#Ravi is my baby and if anyone takes this seriously just don’t

[1doesnotsimplyhavejust1fandam]

Hot take that isn’t actually a hot take so much as it is a joke: EddieAna is all Ravi’s fault because he said the q word and started off the “Jinx” shift of insanity

[what-do-1000-swords-look-like]

So I have to just talk about this episode for a second and how out of sorts it felt to me. I have a lot of feelings and I just need to get them out and throw them into the void. I still have my rewatches to do, of course, but I truly am trying to connect some of these events to the characters' overall stories and basic logic.

Let me just start out with I think we're in a very good place with Buddie. But everything outside of that? Whoa.

I'm not saying the episode was bad. It was meant to be intense, a closeup to the chaos arc, and a lot was going on. But did anyone else feel like some things were...not fitting well? The resolution we got to Athena's situation with Hudson and of course thankfully Harry is safe, it all played out well I thought. Though the circumstances around it felt a bit odd to me.

For example, Michael who was married to Athena for such a long time knows she's not going to wait at home, but didn't once think that during a blackout, it might be a good idea to keep track of who is walking in the front door? I get it, be helpful to your neighbors, a very nice thing to do, but how do you know someone walking around the neighborhood won't take advantage of that fact? And not even in the whole they'll eat your food or possibly knock off something kind of way but in a this-person-could-be-potentially-dangerous-to-everyone kind of way. That felt like an odd choice of common sense to not only have Michael being dismissive of but to then call attention to it twice, once of Harry being the one to call Hudson out on not knowing who he is and then showing Hudson helping himself to a drink while Michael and David are having a drink in the background, laughing and talking, only paying attention to each other. And then to have Michael turning around and getting angry at Athena for not telling him that Hudson was on the loose (when she only figured out mere minutes beforehand that she might be a target) so he would have been on the lookout and wouldn't have let their neighbors in...it just felt so off to me. Not that parents wouldn't snap at each other in that situation, not that Michael wouldn't feel guilty and was probably lashing out, but I don't know how else to put it, it just felt off. The only thing I can think of is that due to the writer being Kristen Reidell is that this situation will be revisited at some point with Harry and Michael.

Then you have Maddie's disappearing act. I get that JLH is taking time for her family behind the scenes but I guess I'm a little confuzzled as to why they chose to do it this way? What was wrong with Maddie being checked into a treatment center to get the help she needs? And when I say being checked into, I mean her checking herself in. Leaving Jee-Yun at the station with Ravi and taking off, not even talking directly to Chimney (I get it, his phone was dead, but still) or Buck, that just feels incredibly off. And her leaving like that is really off for her character. I get it, she is suffering from PPD, but still. It would have been a more positive message I think to have her check herself into a treatment center, with the support of Chimney and Buck and those who love her, rather than have her dump the baby at the firestation and run. I'm sure the writers have a plan and I do trust in it, but I do wish they had thought about the message choosing that action sends. This isn't the 50's, there are multiple resources to help mothers suffering from PPD. But ever since it was confirmed Maddie had PPD, it kind of felt like we were back in the 50's and no one talks about it. I just didn't care for the way that was handled if I'm being completely honest.

Eddie and Ana's breakup. While I'm not too broken up over this, no pun intended, I did find their handling of it to be a bit odd. Don't get me wrong, it was a very good scene for Eddie and it was more emotional than I expected it to be (I think some of us have been where Ana was in a relationship and can be somewhat empathetic to her plight), but Eddie not talking to Christopher? Us not seeing Ana saying goodbye to Christopher? It's almost as if Christopher got relegated to the background. I mean, I get it, this was about Eddie and his relationship with Ana, and of course he threw up the Christopher shield again. "Chris loves you so much." But to have Christopher there in the beginning, to have Eddie say that to Ana in front of Christopher but then try to back track, then to move right in for the kill after closing the door, I don't know man, it just felt off to me. It was good to see Eddie make his decision, a decision we all saw coming to be quite frank. But the way it did, I don't know, it just felt extremely off.

Buck and Maddie - where tf did this sibling relationship go? Like seriously. We never saw a phone call or a text (which didn't require both actors to shoot) when Eddie got shot. We only see Maddie interacting with Chim about it. Then we never see Buck finding out about her PPD (that we know of). During the chaos, Buck never even asks about her (that I can remember). The only mention we get of Jee-Yun is during the power czar scene in 5x02. I get it, Buck is in a new relationship, but as we've seen so far, it's not all it's cracked up to be and he's not twitterpated so to speak. He still has a life outside of Taylor and vice versa. So wtf? (this is why I usually binge everything once it's aired btw for all other shows, I can't watch some of these live but I couldn't wait, I needed to know how my 911 faves are doing!!!)

The only thing I can think is that we've seen Bobby's earthquake (I think it really hit this episode with Harry's kidnapping and Athena's standoff with Hudson), Chim's bombs hitting (with Maddie running off), and some of Eddie's mudslide (I have a feeling that there may be a reaction from Christopher, maybe not a strong one, but something after this episode, especially since we didn't see Chris' reaction this one or Eddie even talking to him about it). The only people we're still waiting on is Hen's having an emergency (which if people's predictions for 5x07 are right, then there you go) and Buck's tsunami. This is truly going to be the season that shakes this team up. The ransomware attack and blackout may be over but I don't think the chaos is if I'm being honest. Not in our characters' arcs for this season.

Even though Buck's reaction to Chim in the promo for 5x04 about Maddie is hurting my heart, I'm hoping Chim tells him then and that snaps things into perspective really quick. And of course, I'm looking forward to more Uncle Buck time. <3

[onewfantaesy]

In prankster au, Taemin spends a good amount of time with Luna and Onew. Luna is stil close with their father, and she gets along well enough with her step-mother, and Taemin has just adored her since he was born. She was 23 when Taemin was born, so she’s been the go-to babysitter his entire life. Taemin absolutely loves her, and Luna has been dating Onew since before Taemin was born, so he doesn’t know any different.

“Luna, Luna, Luna,” Taemin sings when Onew unlocks the door. Taemin usually stays at their house after school until his mother gets off work and comes to pick him up.

“Taemin, Taemin, Taemin,” she sings back from where she’s folding laundry in the living room. “How was school?”

“Terrible because Onew was mean to me.”

“What?”

Luna looks shocked, a little concerned, and then just sighs.

“What did you do this time?” She asks.

“Nothin’!” Taemin whines, flopping onto the couch to cling to her side. When she gives him a pointed look, he pouts and mumbles, “M’teacher found fake bugs in my backpack.”

“Again?”

“But I didn’t do anything with ‘em!”

“Did you get detention again?”

“No,” Taemin mumbles, fiddling with Luna’s shirt. “But I gotta sit on the bench at recess the rest of the week.”

Luna sighs and puts a hand on his head, “Oh, Taemin.”

“Mommy ‘n Daddy gotta sign a slip ‘cause of it.”

“Well they need to know you got in trouble again.”

“But it’s not a detention!” Taemin clarifies, sticking a finger up as if to prove a point. “So Daddy can’t take my Pokémon games away!”

“That’s up for Daddy to decide,” Luna tells him.

“Tell him not to,” Taemin whines. “Tell him I wasn’t doing it to be bad, it was for my friends!”

“Why don’t you tell him that yourself?”

“‘Cause he’ll believe you more.”

“Tell me everything that happened,” she coos, smoothing back his hair and sending a quick smirk to Onew when he scoffs and passes behind the couch to go change in their bedroom.

“Well it started with Chanyeol being a jerkoff during PE-”

“Don’t say jerkoff, that’s not nice.”

“Chanyeol’s not nice!”

“Not saying bad words will help you get your point across that you weren’t being bad,” Luna explains.

“Fine, it started with Chanyeol being a meanie during PE.”

“That’s better. Tell me the rest.”

Onew comes back a few minutes later, and Taemin is already done telling his little tale. Before he forgets though, Onew leans over the back of the couch and taps Taemin’s head.

“Hey, you,” Onew says, waiting for Taemin to look up at him. “Go get that bag of fake bugs. Now, please.”

“Why?” Taemin whines, but he pulls his backpack up and pulls out the bag of fake cockroaches and centipedes. When Onew takes it from him, Taemin whines even louder. “Hey! What’re you doin’ with it?”

“These bugs, wherever you got them from, have only gotten you in trouble the last couple weeks. They should have been confiscated a long time ago.”

“You said you’re not a teacher when we’re at home!” Taemin accuses. “Give ‘em back!”

“I’m not confiscating them as the vice principal, but as a concerned family member.”

“You’re not my dad, you can’t take my stuff!”

Taemin is kneeling on the couch now, reaching up to try and grab the bag from Onew’s hands.

“Give it back, give it back!”

“Why are you getting so upset?” Luna asks, trying to get Taemin to sit back down. Then she turns to Onew. “And you! Stop antagonizing him!”

“These bugs have been nothing but trouble!”

“They’re mine!”

“Don’t yell at me,” Onew warns him.

“Stop acting like my dad, you’re annoying!”

“You know what’s annoying?” Onew asks him. “Having your little brother-in-law get in trouble almost every other day and having to discipline him constantly. You’re in fourth grade, Taemin. You shouldn’t be getting in this much trouble.”

“I’m not in high school!” Taemin snaps back. “I don’t have’ta be responsible yet!”

“Why don’t you both just calm down?” Luna insists, pulling Taemin to sit down and look at her. “Why do you want these bugs so bad?”

“Because they’re mine,” Taemin cries, his face turning red.

“Where did you get them?”

“From the pier! They were just throwin’ them out!”

“Oh jeez, the ones from the balloon popping game?” She asks. When Taemin nods, she sighs. “I thought they looked familiar.”

“Can I have them back now?” Taemin whines.

“I think,” Luna says carefully, not wanting to upset him, “that you can live without them for a week or so. When your mommy comes to pick you up, I think we’ll talk about it with her.”

Taemin whines and falls against her lap.

“Will you just tell me why you’re so upset?”

“I don’t want Daddy to take my games away,” he whines, rubbing at his eyes. “It’s not fair.”

“If Daddy said you would get your games taken away if you got in trouble again, I think that’s very fair,” Luna says.

“That’s ‘cause you’re a grown-up.”

“What does that have to do with it?”

“Grown-ups are all mean and stupid and have no fun and make everything boring,” Taemin snaps.

“That’s not very nice,” Luna teases. “You’ve been getting in trouble a lot lately. Daddy gave you a warning about what would happen if you got in trouble again so soon. And you didn’t listen, or you didn’t take it seriously, and now that’s coming back to bite you in the butt. The only person you have to be upset with is yourself.”

“And Chanyeol.”

“You should have told a teacher he was being mean to your friends when it was happening,” she tells him. “You can’t punish him yourself. That’s not how it works.”

“But then I’d be a snitch.”

“Taemin,” she sighs, running her fingers through his hair. “There’s just no pleasing you, is there?”

“No.”

“Will you tell me what else has got you so upset?”

Taemin pouts and looks towards Onew before whispering, “Only if he isn’t listening.”

Luna turns to Onew, shares a confused look with him, and then shoos him out of the room. Once he’s gone, Luna looks at Taemin with a very worried expression on her face.

“What happened?” she whispers. “Did he do something to you? Did he hurt you?”

“No,” Taemin mutters, moving to lean against her side and play with her hair. “I dunno. Sorta.”

“Tell me what happened.”

“It’s just,” Taemin stutters, a catch in his voice. He won’t look at Luna. “He always - he’s meaner to me than he is to anyone else and it’s not fair and it’s just ‘cause - ‘cause he knows me and it’s not fair and he didn’t have Ravi or Kai or Moonkyu in his office as long as he had me in there and it’s not fair and he didn’t even have Chanyeol in there as long as me and why does he think I’m so bad?”

“Oh, baby,” she sighs, holding him close and trying her best to comfort him. “It’s not that he thinks your bad. You’re not bad at all! You’re just a little bit of a troublemaker, that’s all. And he probably kept you in there longest because he knew he could get the whole truth out of you. It’s not that he thinks you’re bad, honest.”

“I wanna go home.”

“Well you’re stuck with us for another couple hours,” she teases. “Come on. Do you need help with your homework?”

“I only want you to help me,” he whines.

“That’s fine,” she says quickly. “Get your homework out, okay? I’ll be right back.”

Taemin pouts at her, looks like he wants to argue, but he doesn’t. He just gets his homework out and pretends he doesn’t hear her go tell Onew off for making Taemin so worried.

[exoplvnet]

Would you really make that for me?! Omg that would be so helpful *-* I already watched some eps and I'm really enjoying it. Also can I be🐰anon then? I'm the anon that asked for ateez in case you don't know hehe

yes, absolutely ! ! ! 

so I mean I can just like…..have the members and names and some fun facts I guess or? also my opinions and all ofc ? a lot of the info will probably just be from their profiles ahaha

this might be long so click to keep reading…

MEMBERS

HONGJOONG/KIM HONGJOONG 김홍중

leader, lead rapper, vocalist, center, composer

dad of the group

born november 7th, 1998

multitalented as hell – rap, vocals, and composition 

something I really admire about him and I noticed from the beginning is how confident of a leader he is? like even with their shows you can see he’s very comfortable delegating tasks and all but also listening to others

his facial expressions are INSANE – he’s all about stage presence, 100%, I always notice his face because he pours a lot of energy into his expressions

he’s one of my bias wreckers, though ngl….really not feelin’ the mullet

SEONGHWA/PARK SEONGHWA 박성화

vocalist, visual

EVERYONE NEEDS TO STOP WHITEWASHING HIM, THAT’S THE TEA

born april 3rd, 1998…mom of the group

he’s the oldest member and tbh I feel like he’s just 100% done with everyone

visual king? legit looks like a statue

like literally a mom 

his expressions are also really fascinating – he’s a talented dancer and singer and all, but honestly…acting skills on point

he needs more lines

YUNHO/JEONG YUNHO 정윤호

main dancer, vocalist

T A L L . TALL TALL TALL. 

born march 23rd, 1999

big ol potterhead, would probably die for Harry Potter while I die for him

dancing king – he and wooyoung are like insanely talented dancers

he’s a complete dork, honestly, I adore him

he has insane coordination, especially for someone so tall lmao

needs more screentime imo

YEOSANG/KANG YEOSANG 강여상

lead dancer, vocalist, visual

not to be dramatic but his birthmark (by his eye) give me a will to live

born June 15th, 1999

where are his LINES

he seems really dedicated towards his goals and I admire that like crazy

former bighit trainee

roommates with wooyoung

another rude one with stage presence – he’s overlooked often but goddamn look at my mans go

SAN/CHOI SAN 최산

main dancer, lead vocalist

one of my biases, he kills me on a daily basis

born july 10th, 1999

somehow isn’t the maknae??? literally acts like it, he’s a sunshine baby

really loves plushies – has a plush named shiber that’s with him like 24/7

crazy talented vocalist and dancer – he moves super fluidly and is very flexible, like legit it’s insane. I compare him a lot to ten from nct (kinda visually?) but just with how fluid his movement is, he’s graceful as HELL

roommates with yunho

like it is physically impossible to frown while looking at him

HE HAS LIKE 2 VERY DISTINCT PERSONALITIES THOUGH – offstage he’s a sunshine child, will hug anyone, giggly, happy baby. onstage it’s like…hi who the fuck said you could be hot? who told you? he goes full hoe mode and looks like he could punch you, I live for it???

MINGI/SONG MINGI 송민기

main rapper, lead dancer

tall big boi with that deep ass voice – I think his rapping reminds me a lot of Ravi from vixx ! 

born august 9th, 1999

similar to san in that his offstage and onstage presences are opposites, he ever seems like he knows what’s going on imo, I love him

roomies with jongho

this is gonna sound so random but when he was bare-faced at some point he has some acne on his cheek and ??? god I ?? love idols without makeup like this sounds WEIRD but it’s ADORABLE imo ? like he seems really human idk

another one of my bias wreckers

WOOYOUNG/JUNG WOOYOUNG 정우영

main dancer, vocalist, visual

one of my biases! and one of my ult biases tbh I’d die for him

born November 26th, 1999

he’s dangerous as hell – cute, smart…and capable of being ridiculously sexy. the worst part? he kNOWS it.

really loves bts, especially jimin, and he used to be a trainee in bighit

roomies with yeosang

something I admire about him is how sincere and humble he is? they all are (like there was this one clip of them answering like would you rather questions and he had some really insightful responses – they always put effort into how they answer questions and they come across super eloquent), he just proves to me often how he’s a lot more than just a pretty face

will bite anyone without provocation, don’t test him

he caught my eye immediately because of how he presents himself? he knows how to shoot the camera winks and sexy looks and just….its dangerous, he’s rude, I wanna sue him constantly 

JONGHO/CHOI JONGHO 최종호

main vocalist, maknae

HIGH NOTES KING

born on October 12th, 2000, he’s the only teen

literally ?? is ?? so strong ?? has done push-ups with Hongjoong on his back, he’s infamous for singing really high notes while breaking fruit in half with his bare hands

his voice really suits passionate and emotional singing imo, like ballads? remarkable, his voice is super rich and multi-layered

he doesn’t act like a maknae at all, like legit…I thought san was the maknae. he’s super mature?? like?? I’m older than him and he seems 8000x more put together than I’ll ever be

very athletic 

GENERAL THINGS

again, I’ve said it, but they don’t seem like rookies. stage presence? on point. rapping and vocals? on point. dance? AMAZING. they work together super well, and I’ve noticed some rookie groups don’t seem like a cohesive whole for a few comebacks? they came out with predebut dance videos (if you haven’t seen those lemme know and I can post links for you), and immediately it was like hi holy shit these boys are a TEAM

they’re very hard-working, humble, and eloquent. I mentioned it with wooyoung but all of them but so much effort into how they respond to things, they take things seriously? it’s really amazing to see, honestly, it’s obvious they care a lot

they’re gonna be BIG, I think. they’re already gaining ground with popularity, sold out their first US tour only a few months after debut (they debuted in October btw), and they even had to change venues with a few concerts so they could accommodate more people after tickets sold out 

one thing I’m sorta concerned about is line distribution? like this isn’t a huge deal with them as it is with other groups (cough nct cough) but…I dunno, it’s obvious their concept is very rap-based (they’re known for beat changes and drops that kinda hit you outta nowhere? amazing content) and I’m a bit worried that hongjoong and mingi will be overworked. like I don’t wanna compare but idk if you know nct – mark and taeyong get ALL the attention? kq has been doing a really good job of being aware of it and giving everyone chances to shine but I don’t want to see ateez become too dependent on those two and not give vocalists opportunities to show off in title tracks. AGAIN I LOVE THEM AND THEY’RE DOING GR8 BUT IT’S A CONCERN OF MINE LOOKING FORWARD/SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT YKNOW

also just in case…here are their dance videos, they’re INSANE

PERFORMANCE VIDEO I

PERFORMANCE VIDEO II

PERFORMANCE VIDEO III

YUNHO SOLO (dancing king GODDAMN)

GROWL COVER VIDEO

THIS ONE KILLS, LONG STORY SHORT – talk about presence (wooyoung and san especially, they’re rude)

lmao Tumblr won’t let me add the video so I’m putting a link HERE

aaaaand lastly, to learn the members….

I use sporcle quizzes (they’ll give a pic and you type in the member name) try

one and two and three (this one is a click the member)

hopefully this was helpful, lemme know if you have questions ~ 

[hakyeonsmelanin]

Prisoner (Ravi x reader)

Hades au and Persephone au!

The god of the underworld took you as his prisoner. Little did he know your heart belonged to another.

warning: character death, sex, a little bit of gore, Ravi being a fucking creep and obsession?? Enjoy anyways x

Sorry y’all I can’t help bringing Hakyeon in 💀 he’s my bias and he owns my ASS sksksksk

He was so tender, so gentle at times that you almost forgot where you were and who he was. Soft sweet nothings were often whispered into your ears, kind caresses consoled you in your times of sadness.

“What troubles you so, little one?”

“I want to go home, Wonshik.” You pleaded tearfully, clinging onto the silk of his shirt. His long fingers threaded themselves into your hair.

“You are home, my love.” He answered simply.

“No, I am not. I am mortal, I am not meant to dwell in a place as dark as this. You know this best above all yet you still keep me here! Im begging you, I wish to go back to my real-“ he cut you off, his voice booming through the air.

“SILENCE! Your home is with me. I decide where you dwell, where you go and what you do! Tell me? Are you not provided for here? Do I not give you, my Queen, the finest of everything?”

“Yes, you do.” You looked to floor, scared to endure his wrath. The last time you had pressed too hard, it hadn’t ended well, it took weeks for your bruises to heal.

“ I do not want to hear of this again. You would do well to remember that.” Hades released you from his grip and walked out of the throne room.

What could the God of death know about a mortal’s sadness?

What could the God of death know about love ?

~

You were the most divine thing he had ever seen. Your smile was radiant, your eyes were beaming and your nature was like that of a child. Always laughing, always happy...were you unaware of the darkness in the world? The corruption, the pain, the death...were they foreign concepts to you?

He had seen you by mistake. A tear in the veil between the worlds had caused him to gaze upon the mortal realm and of all things, he came across you. Once he first looked at you, Wonshik found he could not stop.

There you sat in a meadow, nonchalantly braiding flowers into your hair, creating a crown of the sorts. An assortment of petals; vivid reds and azure blues ; soft pinks and purples were knotted sweetly into your locks.

If it was a crown you wanted, Wonshik would give you one.

If you wanted to be a queen, Wonshik would make you his.

~

“I love you, little one.” He poured some wine into the golden goblet in front of you before placing a kiss on your head and sitting in his own chair, a dark and intricately crafted thing. You would expect nothing less for the God of death.

Despite not needing to eat himself, Hades arranged for you to have dinner every evening. It was something that gave you peace of mind and allowed you to feel closer to home. Maybe if you did normal things, you could feel more normal. But nothing about this was normal. Nothing about this was right.

One who breathes has no place in the land of the dead.

“I love you too, Hades.” You lied before taking a sip of the wine. It was delicious as always, and left a sweet aftertaste on your palette.

“I have told you many times, beloved, address me as Wonshik.” He seemed to be in a good mood today.

You sat in silence after that, with you digging into your food and Wonshik watching you lovingly.

“Tell me of your life before you came here. I want to know all there is about you.” This caught you off guard. He was normally so uptight about you mentioning the life he stole from you on the mortal realm. It had been two years since he brought you here and not once did he allow you to speak of such matters, they were almost considered taboo. But looking up at him, his expression was earnest. He was serious.

“ I...come from a poor family. My father works at the markets, he sells cheap cloth and linen. My mother sews. My brother is younger than I and I was very close to him.” Wonshik smiled at that, making a hand gesture as if to say ‘continue’.

“...my fondest memory of him and I was at the age of eleven. He was nine. We both went to the markets with my father and tried to help him sell his merchandise, competing with each other to see who could make the most sales. He won, of course, being smaller and cuter although I made my fair share of sales too. In order to get my revenge, I tied his feet up when he fell asleep that night and left him. He didn’t notice until he had to get up in the morning and fell down, falling straight onto his face. It took him a whole year for his tooth to grow back.” You laughed at the giant, gaping hole where one of your brother’s front teeth should have been. He didn’t take it too seriously, he just pranked you back.

That was something you loved about your brother, his unwavering cheekiness.

“My love, I hadn’t known you were so mischievous. What was your brother’s name?” Wonshik chuckled at your antics.

“Sanghyuk. He’s not my brother by blood, my father found him as a baby, crying outside of a brothel. But he was still very dear to me.” You missed him more and more every day.

“Mmm, did you have anyone else who was dear to you?”

Before you could stop yourself, the name fell from your mouth. You had gotten too caught up in remiscising but the memories you had with the boy who had dark eyes and golden skin were so precious to you, you couldn’t help but say his name.

“Hakyeon.” Oh no, what had you done.

Wonshik, observant as always, realised the slight widening of your eyes, the small gasp from your lips.

“Hakyeon. Who is this hakyeon?” He leaned forward, all the softness in his expression gone now.

“...Just a boy that I used to play with as a child.” He was so much more. Hakyeon, although a mortal, had something Wonshik could never have. He had your heart. Once upon a time, he was your betrothed and you dreamed of a future with him.

Then Hades stole you away.

“Just a boy?”

You gulped your food down, trying to keep your voice as steady as possible. If he got to Hakyeon, you would never forgive yourself.

“Yes, Wonshik.”

No more was said about the matter.

No more was said that night.

~

The clothes you wore now were fit for a queen-no, a goddess. In your own realm, you wore simple dresses made of cotton and sandals created from weak leather. In the underworld, you wore the finest crushed velvets ranging from shades of deep maroon, hazy greens and blues and sometimes, jet black. Your hair was always in an intricate up-do as requested by Hades, who loved to see as much of your face as possible.

Putting on the clothes, no matter how beautiful, felt like a lie.

Taking them off, felt much worse.

“Come closer to me, little one.” Hades gestured with his index finger to the bed he sat on and you followed hesitantly, coming to a halt in front of him.

You were now in nothing but your undergarments, shivering lightly at the cold. Your captor placed his hands on your waist and began placing soft kisses on your stomach.

“I had never felt love before I met you,” His kisses moved upwards, from your navel onto your breasts and chest. He removed the lace confining your breasts and sucked lightly, eliciting a groan from you. His digits on the other hand moved to your nether regions, slipping over your clothed heat.

“I had not felt anything before I met you, do you know that, love?” His lips moved to your ears now, whispering gently.

“N-no.”

“Well, now do you know. You are my most prized possession, my shining jewel. I am lucky to have you as my wife.”

Hades lay you on the bed now, climbing on top of you. How you hated yourself for enjoying this so much. He was evil, he took you from everything you knew based on the delusion that he loved you and still, you yearned for him at times like this. What would Hakyeon think? Would he be disgusted at you? You wished it could Hakyeon ontop of you instead, the way it should have been.

You closed your eyes in an attempt to banish all thoughts of your childhood love. Luckily, Hades helped you with that through the quickening pace of his fingers.

“Tell me you love me, Y/N. Say it like you mean it, this time.”

He removed his fingers, positioning his member at your enterance.

“Say it.”

“I...”

“Say it.”

You moaned when he entered you slightly, only to remove himself. Didn’t he want you right now? How was he stopping himself from losing all control? He ground his hips up against yours and you gave in, the more wanton side of you taking over.

“I-I love you, Wonshik. I love you so much.”

He kissed your lips and entered you roughly, causing you to yelp into his mouth.

You hated him for controlling you like this.

But you hated yourself more for enjoying it.

~

“Y/N?” No. No. No. It couldn’t be him. Your senses had to be decieving you.

“Hakyeon?” He knelt on the floor as Hades stood over him. His skin was bloody, eyes glazed with tears and lips quivering. This had to be a nightmare.

“W-Wonshik, what is the meaning of this?” You stood up from your throne and moved closer to the two. The God grabbed Hakyeon from the collar of his flimsy shirt and dragged him backwards before flinging him onto the ground completely.

“You love this man.”

Your eyes snapped up to Hades in shock. His expression was viscious, his chest puffed out as though he was a wild beast but the look in his eyes told you he was hurt, he felt wronged. Now you would pay the price for it. Hakyeon would.

“No! No, I don’t! I told you I played with him as a child but that was a long time ago! I never loved him!” Your chest was pounding and the sides of your head were stinging. This couldn’t be real.

Hakyeon sobbed on the ground. His shoulders shook and his breath was heavy. How you wished to embrace him, tell him it would all be okay.

“Little one, do not take me for a fool. I saw the look on your face when you spoke his name. You care him, deeply so. You love him. But that is not acceptable, when you are wed to me.” He walked to you and gripped your hair tightly.

“Ah! I- I swear to you, Wonshik, I love you! I have no feelings for this boy! I have not seen in him years! It’s you, my love, it’s always been you! You are the one who owns my heart, my soul and my body!” Your exclaimed, tears falling from your eyes.

Wonshik’s eyes widened at that and his grip on your scalp wavered. His voice was a deep whisper when he spoke to you next.

“In the two years, you have been here...not once have you told me that you love me without myself having to say it first. Not once have you ever called me any term of endearment. Now...now, I know you love this man.” He released you and walked over to Hakyeon, whos eyes were stuck on your hysterical form.

You chased after him, grabbing at his back but it made no difference.

“Please! Wonshik, it doesn’t matter how I feel for him when I only have you! You’re the only one in my life! He hasn’t intruded once! We can forget him! We can carry on and live our lives together, our eternity! He doesn’t matter, j-j-just return him to his realm! You and I live here peacefully, there’s no reason for him to even be here!”

He picked up Hakyeon, as he weighed nothing and didn’t even acknowledge you. Hakyeon’s eyes widened as he looked at you, opening his mouth to speak.

“You are the one who has ruined my marriage. The scum who has taken my wife from me.” Hades growled into his ear before raising his arm and pushing him further up. Hakyeon was dangling in the air now, eyes filled with pure terror as he struggled. He looked at you lovingly, knowing you would be the last sight he would ever see. He could’ve spent his whole life looking at you.

Hakyeon often dreamed of finding you again, after your disappearance.

Not like this, though.

“Y/N! Look awa-“ he never finished his sentence. Hades wrapped his fingers across his neck and you ran forward but it was too late. You heard a gruesome crack.

Blood seeped from his mouth, his eyes were cloudy.

You screamed.

His body fell limp on the ground and you scrambled towards it, nuzzling your chest into his chest. Wonshik was silent. You cried and cried and cried into the body of your love, feeling the warmth leave it with every touch. His hair fell over his eyes just as cutely as it did in your childhood and you moved it to the side to pepper kisses on his forehead, cheeks and eventually his lips.

He was gone.

Gone.

Gone.

It was all that monster’s fault.

Looking back at Wonshik, you saw him standing with a blank expression although you knew he was hurt at what he just witnessed. Your true feelings, your love for a mere mortal when Hades himself, a powerful God meant nothing to you.

“You...you...devil! You fucking monster! Look at what you have done! Everywhere you go, everything you do causes such pain! If you thought this would bring us closer, you are mistaken...because I will never, ever even come close to loving you. You miserable, jealous, pathetic excuse for a creature there is nothing I would love more than to see your demise.” You seethed, the anger you hid for two years finally erupting. Your voice was a hoarse, ragged and vengeful sound. It was aged and seeped with hatred. You couldn’t recognise it.

“Because you’re right! I don’t love you, I never have and I never will. You REPULSE me!” You roared at Wonshik whilst cradling Hakyeon, hoping somehow that he would just come back to you.

Wonshik’s eyes were glossy now. A river of tears fell onto his cheeks but he said nothing and left the throne room, leaving you alone once more.

[gold-from-straw]

Help me choose what to write!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

In the interests of trying to be consistent, I figure I’ll do my round-up of what I’ve been writing this month as my blog post today, but first, I wanted to flail a little about @stardustloki who sent me messages AS they read Zero Degrees! It literally made my New Year’s! If you’re supposed to spend your New Year’s Eve doing things you want to represent the whole of the following year, I feel pretty damn positive about that ^_^ I’m also going to write all the comments up on post-it notes and stick them in my own copy of the book so I can make myself happy whenever I want!

This month has been relatively quiet, actual-writing-wise. I’ve done quite a lot of fanfic stuff, a bit of planning, but mostly I’ve been editing Zero Degrees to publish on the 21st. I’m really pleased with how it turned out, but I’ve also decided to start sending it, and the next two WIPs I’ve got (The Willing and Not Broken) to publishers and agents because I SUCK at marketing. So bad. Like every now and then I’ll hold up a copy of my book and say ‘hey, guys, I wrote a thing AHHH RUN AWAY!’

Needless to say, that’s not a particularly successful strategy.

I’m also trying to work out what books to get started on for next time. I’m trying to aim to have at least one book in each stage of the process – drafting by hand, typing up, editing and formatting ready to publish, and right now that first column is empty. I’m going to choose two books to work on. I’ve already chosen the first one, a queer romance set in 1920s colonial Kenya because I at least vaguely know my history in that area! Hopefully my family won’t be too horrified that I’ve made the family history gay...

I now just have to choose from the following for my second WIP:

I’m Not Here: About two kids (late teens) who don’t realise they’re part of a network of magic users because their parents die before they can explain it all to them. Not being able to use their magic causes mental health issues. There’s some cool stuff I’m looking forward to with antipodes (places that are exactly opposite each other on the Earth) because I’m a total nerd. Seriously, I spent an hour working out 6 antipodes which should create a good network over the Earth, it was very satisfying... I also learned a lot about French Antarctic territory, which I didn’t even know existed...

Passing: About a young person who’s spent their entire life passing as something they’re not. They look white, but they’re mixed race. They sound English, but they’re Kenyan (hello, I will write what I know thank you very much!). They appear as a straight man, but the story is about them realising that they might not be either straight or male. It’s got the potential to be really angsty, but their (ex)girlfriend/(always) best friend is awesome and I’m looking forward to writing their complex relationship. She’s also a grown up June from The Forest Hotel, for no reason whatsoever other than she wanted to be involved... The main character isn’t exactly based on me, but I have a lot of identity issues based on passing for things I’m not, and feeling guilty about it. I’m also hoping to bring in a lot of discussions about heteronormativity and the kind of bullshit that passes for acceptable in het relationships

Changeling: A child gets lost in the forest and comes back not quite the same. The fairies have stolen the first one and sent back one of their changelings because fairies are creepy as hell and just like to screw with people. This is about two parents who don’t care how their child acts, they’ll love them all the same and try to guide them to learn how to behave kindly. The child isn’t used to this kind of treatment at all, and starts to become guilty about taking the place of someone who was so obviously loved. The entire thing was triggered off on a tangent when I was writing Living the Dream, and I’m planning to have a set of young punks in there, influenced by my Cre and Mal in that story, but also the Rowdy 3 from Dirk Gently, to guide the changeling girl and help the parents when they launch a rescue...

Ripples: Two people at the end of their endurance meet by chance and stop each other from making a terrible permanent choice. Twenty-something Li is panicking about her new baby and single-motherhood, and 17 year old James isn’t sure he can cope with his dad’s beatings any more, or the fact that his boyfriend is terrified of them being found out. When James gets thrown out of his home, Li puts aside her own problems to give him a place to stay, and they help each other get better. James meets a lovely boy, Ravi, and Li makes friends with Ravi’s mum. The romance is slightly influenced by Wicked Boys and Stop Me in Hours of Darkness, where Ravi is kind of like Harry, and James is kind of like Credence. Or at least that’s where they started, but they’ve become so completely their own people in my head now...

I still haven’t fully decided which one of those to go ahead with… I’m up for a vote, if anyone wants to have their say? 

Also just in case Tumblr gets too overrun with porn bots and spontaneously combusts, I also blog about all my original stuff on Wordpress! Come find me if that’s your thing!

[missarabellla]

Top 10 Bromances

I was tagged by sweet @thedarkbathtub 💕 Thank you madam, it was a pleasure to talk about my favourite bromances :')

Goblin of course...

I mean, this should not be a surprise, right??? One of the most funny, cutest and adorable bromances kdrama world can ever seen.

MarkJin

Yes, to me MarkJin is the cutest bromance in GOT7 🤷🏻‍♀️ I love JJ and Markson too but from the first moment I watched first IGOT7 episode, I found markjin so adorable. Their cute bromance might be the biggest factor for my bias situation in goy7 actually... (Mark as my bias and Jinyoung as my bias wrecker lol)

BTOVIXX

Both groups are funny, both groups are extra, both groups are talented. Btob and Vixx everyone! I love their close friendship, especially between Hakyeon and Minhyuk since the program they had become close, Romantic Idol. I remember one time Minhyuk said when N having a hard time from his leadership responsibilities he tells things he can't tell anyone to Minhyuk. They're just so sweet :')

Sandeul & Jin & Ken

These three talented vocalists and cuties! They are all same age and they don't hesitate to show their close friendship, through social media or on camera, dosen't matter. They spent new year together, they went snowboarding and they talked about each other a lot. I love them all <3

Taemin Squad

(Taemin & Jongin & Sungwoon & Jimin & Timoteo(Moonkyu) & Kwonho & Ravi)

This group makes me feel so emotional :') Because I remember the times we were babying Taemin since he's the cute maknae of SHINee. Through time he became a senior to many idols and he had many friends and eventually he created this group of precious friendship. I remember they even have a logo representing their friendship, showing 6 people (Kwonho is a non-idol friend btw). I think Ravi got into to their group last because of that, I'm not sure but dosen't matter because their friendship is so fun to watch!

N & Leo

Mom and dad of their group~ Hakyeon might seem as a clingy leader sometimes but that's because he loves his members so much and even though Leo is really shy on camera, he tolerates to Hakyeon most hahha when you watch them often you seriously can fee their close relationship, it's really cute.

Lee Jong Suk & Kim Woo Bin

This is the only actor bromance on this list but they deserve to be here. I love School 2013 and it was so nice to watch Jong Suk and Woo Bin's friendship developing :') I think Woo Bin invited him to act together in his drama Uncontrollably Fond but Jongsuk was shooting W at that time so they were kind of rivals hahha

Monteen

Of course this is not a surprise either. Surely this list wouldn't be complete without our other two extra funny groups :') I love how they get hyped in each other's performances during awards shows~ What a great friendship they have!

Mbleast

This is probably the oldest bromance in this list and that's why it makes me so nostalgic... I miss seeing these guys together so much T_T They were the only close bromance during those old times where K-Pop was not well known yet. Their interactions were always the funniest, especially during the legendary variety show 'Oh My School'. I'll never forget Lee Joon and Gikwang's dance battle :')

Changlix (Felix & Changbin)

Yes, I know they did not even debut yet and I'm already putting them to my list. My top 5/10/20 lists always change anyway and this shouldn't be a surprise too because I'm obsessed with Stray Kids these days ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ But seriously, Felix and Changbin's friendship is so precious. Felix always seems to hug or cling to Changbin in one way or another and not just in their shows, this mostly can be seen in their Vlive videos as well. I was actually going to put the moment Felix got eliminated as a gif because their hug and their moment in there seems so special but my heart just can not take that 😅

aaand this was it! It was so difficult but fun to choose among many precious bromances hahha

I taaaag @svt-textss, @sunmoon-star, @marksonbiased, @leesey30 and whoever wants to do it! ^^

[jhsdaydreams]

warm coffee (bff birthday drabble)

pairing: raven x yoongi genre: realistic fluff count: 800

summary: preparation for comebacks are always difficult and yoongi knows this better than anyone; typically holed up in his studio laboring over his music in order to meet deadlines. but it’s always important to take breaks! especially when it’s your girlfriend’s birthday.

triggers: none

a/n: happy birthday to my baby sis, @herspilledink !! i hope your special day is absolutely amazing and that this drabble can bring you a little more happiness! i’m really really really glad i could do this for a second time (especially considering how crazy last year was). BUT yeah ily and s&s will be my favorite ship until the end of time ;A; PS! this is why i’ve been mia from rp things lol sOrRy! replies are coming! i swear!

Go away.

The cheeky rug stared Raven in the face and she couldn’t help but chuckle at the white cat’s knowing smirk and brazen double middle fingers.

“Yeah. Why don’t you go away,” she mumbled slipping off her shoes and reaching for the studio door handle.

It was locked. Of course.

A heavy sigh escaped her. All this time they’d been dating and he still refused to leave the door unlocked. Even when he knew she was coming over. And the door passcode? She didn’t even allow her mind to go there.

Her tiny fist rapped on the door and was greeted by stoic, empty silence.

Come on, Yoongi. Of all days.

Lips pressed into a tight line, she fished her phone out of her bag and tapped a quick message.

     open the door pls

She waited, patience waning, arms crossed. But despite simmering agitation, the staccato vibration in her palm sent her heart into a frenzied flutter.

Raven peeked at the screen, tucking a curly tress behind her ear.

     just wait a minute, small fry

Her eyes rolled. Does he really think a nickname is going to mollify me at this point? She huffed - the lone sound echoing through the barren hallway - but felt her frigid, glass heart melt a little.

Only for you . . .

Leaning against the wall she gazed up at the ceiling. Panels overhead grew fuzzy as her mind wandered into treacherous seas.

Wonder what everyone did today? I can’t believe the comeback is already coming up . . . She bit her lip, brow furrowing. Should I have even come over? I know it’s my birthday, but he’s probably so busy . . .

Question after question cascaded like a waterful, flooding her ears, deafening the surrounding world until she jumped at the quiet click of the door opening.

“Alright. You can come in now.” Yoongi’s voice was nonchalant. He stood in the doorway, eyebrows raised and a triumphant twinkle in his eyes.

As her stomach did somersaults, she drank him in - comfy in his dark hoodie and jeans, but it was impossible to ignore the even darker circles under his eyes. Pulling at a strand of hair, she questioned her presence again.

I don’t want to be a burden . . .

Noting her hesitation, Yoongi took a step towards her. “Are you even listening to me?” He tugged on her sleeve, pulling her reluctant form into his arms. The smaller girl sank into soft cotton, fragrant violet waves washing away her unforgiving turbulence.

“Yeah. I heard you,” she mumbled into his chest.

“I missed you,” he said before placing a gentle kiss in her hair. She stayed quiet, giving him a firm squeeze in return.

“Now come inside,” he insisted, forcing their tangle of limbs into his small studio and nudging the door shut with his foot. “So . . . are you gonna stay like this or actually look at what I’ve spent hours slaving over?”

She pulled away, expression blank, mind overflowing. Yoongi gestured to room around him with a light shrug.

She let her eyes adjust to the dim lighting before feeling them widen. “Oh . . .” Mouth slightly agape she surveyed the room that had been transformed into a birthday wonderland. A plethora of pastel blue balloons danced along the ceiling. The cerulean arc of a sign tacked on the wall that read, HAPPY BDAY RAVI. Twirling tinsel that was draped over everything, spilling onto the floor. A tiny potted orchid next to a cake topped with azure frosting and a small Ponyo figurine.

“I don’t know what to say.” She laughed, eyes still glazed over in childlike wonder, smile irremovable.

“Then don’t say anything.” Yoongi reached for her, his arms encircling her waist, pressing the soft plush of his lips against her neck - leaving a small trail before meeting the blissful curvature of her own. Raven relaxed, diving into him. He tasted like the allure of aromatic coffee, warm and stimulating. Energized, her hands entwined with the recently dyed obsidian of his hair. 

But sensing her urgency Yoongi pulled away - always wanting to keep a teasing upper hand. He cocked his head at her, eyes probing. “Hm. Can’t get enough of me? I don’t blame you.”

She gave him a tentative, jesting whack on the arm. “Don’t ruin the moment.”

“Fine. But seriously . . .” His smile faltered, fingers meshing with hers. “I know I’ve been busy with . . . everything lately. I just wanted today to be special.”

Raven’s eyes softened. Her love was always working hard to make his dreams come true. She was just happy he took the time to think of her.

Squeezing his hand, she gave him a true smile - one filled with every ounce of affection she could muster. “Thank you. For this. But don’t you know by now? My days will always be special as long as I have you.”

[flyingangelofblueislands]

Flower Boy Prince pt. 5

VIXX Leo (Taekwoon) X You X VIXX Ravi (Wonshik)

genre: fluff (and a slice of baby angst, i think?)

a/u: college friends

Bias X Reader

After your roommate, ran interference via request by text message in the middle of the movie theater, Wonshik took her home and you left the theater with Taekwoon. You had walked down just a few blocks to a small hole in the wall “mom and pop” type restaurant. Sliding into a seat next to a wall, you waited for someone to come up and take your orders. After placing them fairly quickly because it was a specialty food shop, you sat grinning at each other. You dipped your head and looked at your lap out of overwhelming shyness all of a sudden. Taekwoon chuckled and leaned forward as he lightly tapped the table. “What is it? Why are you acting like that all of a sudden?” “It’s nothing, it’s just….” You looked back up at him, “You’ve been so different since yesterday. It’s hard to believe. Feels like it came out of nowhere.” He smiled and sat back in his seat and glanced to the side a bit unsure about how to say his next words. “It’s not really out of nowhere…I’ve just never had the chance…found the time to tell you…” You nodded because you knew the very feeling and found it quite ironic. But mostly, relieving. You hadn’t been crushing on him in vain. You weren’t just imagining the glances he would give you on nights out with his friends. Or the nervous pitch in his voice the first time he called your phone after you exchanged numbers. Taekwoon continued, “I’ve liked you for some time now. Ever since we met in Costume Design…” You stifled a scream at the memory. The day he transferred into your professor’s class from a different costume design class, your “model” had been out sick, so you were busy showing your draft to some other class mates on yourself. You were mid-unnecessary spin with your arms spread out to the sides moving up and down, when he came in the door and you whacked him in the chin. He stumbled backwards and your classmates half laughed, half gasped. You rushed him with apologies and helped him get his balance back. You ended up following him to an empty seat to make sure he wasn’t bleeding or bruised. You had recognized him from other classes before, but that was your first time actually meeting.  “It really didn’t even hurt. I just liked the attention I was getting from you after it happened.”  Your mouth dropped open and eyes widened. He smiled smugly, “It was worth it.”  After that day you didn’t talk much per-se besides a standard greeting on entering the classroom or leaving for the day or questions about the coursework. Until one day you had to pick reading partners and he waltzed up and picked you. “I knew you were serious about work, so it was a plus.” “That’s the story you sold to me!” You  both laughed at the memory. You crossed information in your mind and started to see all the tiny hints he had laid out all along. Shaking your head you commented,  “This is unbelievable.” “I didn’t wanna ruin anything. We were becoming such good friends. I wanted to wait until I was sure..” “Sure about what?” “Sure about my feelings…I liked you, but I didn’t know how much. though it would fade over time. But it’s been a year and now it’s like–I felt like I was going to explode if I didn’t tell you soon. I wanted to tell you at the cat cafe yesterday…” He sucked his teeth with regret, then reached over the table and took your hand. Stroking the backs of your hands with his thumbs softly, he looked deeply into your eyes and asked, “Y/N…I like you. As more than a friend. I want to walk you home from work and meet you on our lunch breaks, and take walks on the weekend and eat food together. I want you to wait for me after class and walk me to the train before I go to work. I want to kiss you good night…” You could feel your breath quicken. You blinked rapidly to make sure you were really awake. Taekwoon’s voice drifted across the table softly and tickled your whole body. You couldn’t help but smile at the warmth spreading inside you. “Will you give me a chance? We’re already such good friends, I know I can take good care of you and you of me.” As much as you crushed on Taekwoon, you couldn’t help but feel a string of hesitation plucking away in your brain. You were great friends, yes. You secretly crushed on him for the last couple of months and apparently he had liked you from the moment you officially met each other. But romantic relationships had a way of changing people. Had a way of layering expectations that one would never put on a friend. Even though you both had been great friends all through and until now, how could you be sure your relationship would live up to expectations and maintain your friendship at the same time? You didn’t know Taekwoon as a boyfriend. He had given you very minute snippets in these last 24 hours, with his gentle worrying and careful demands. But what if, like it was said to, the things you liked so much about him became the things you hated? What if the same happened to him? What if his heart changed after seeing more of you than before? You wouldn’t be able to be friends again, and you would lose someone who was now very close to your heart. In the face of this real proposition and not a mere crush fantasy playing out in your day-dreaming head, you were actually scared. Taekwoon noticed your hesitation and stroked the backs of your hands with his thumbs. “You don’t have to answer me know. I just…needed you to know my feelings. Whatever you decide though…I don’t want our friendship to change…” “Me either, Taek…don’t take this the wrong way..I’m just..I’m just a bit..apprehensive about all this–not that I hadn’t thought of it myself!” You blurted out not wanting to give the wrong impression. Taekwoon’s facial expression suddenly brightened at your words. His eyebrows raised as he asked you,  “Really? You’ve thought about us before?” “Yeah…” You nodded shyly. “I’ve had a crush on you for a couple months now…but I couldn’t bring myself to tell you. I was scared I was overthinking things and confessing to you would ruin our friendship.” Taekwoon shook his head as he laughed softly. Sitting back in his seat he ran his hands through his hair, pushing it out of his eyes. Before looking at you seriously, “Our friendship is important to me, too. Very important. I wouldn’t even bring this up by chance of ruining it but–” he leaned forward and folded his arms on the table as he looked into your eyes. he seemed so determined and sure. “I’ve never felt this strongly about anyone before. I dream about you. I wake up wondering what you’re doing. I can’t wait to get to school and see you. I walk down the street and think I’ve heard your voice or smelled your perfect scent and lose my mind–” Leo exhaled harshly and sat back again, restless. “I feel like I’m going crazy, Y/N–I know I’ve gone crazy–crazy about you.” You baulked at the surety in his tone. His words spinning your head around. “Taek…” You breathed out. Taekwoon took your hands from across the table again.  “Just promise me you’ll think about it some more. You thought about it before..think about it again, won’t you?” You nodded silently, and looked into your lap where your phone was vibrating. Wonshik was calling..

**********************************************************************

part 5 yeahhh!!! So my Marshmallows, where ya’ll at right now with this? Fed up? Stressed out? :D

I’ll wrap it up here,huh? Their stages seem to be abruptly finished (and so this fic will be, too).

All the other comeback eras ended with a neat little video addressing the wrap-up but this year nothing? I guess because we got some videos for their anniversary (which were so cute btw). Anyway. Don’t hurt me! XD! Think of it as an open ending for you to make your decision! A/N ** they eventually posted a "wrap up" video for their Shangri-La promotions. But this is it for this series still. lol

Love, Peace, and quick Fluff reads!

-admin Fluffintine

[sueboohscorner]

#iZombie Season 3 Episode 6 "Some Like it a Hot Mess" Recap/Review

BITCH SLAP

This episode begins with a glimpse at Liv's next meal.. An extremely annoying woman-child, attached to her headphones, and acting very much like many girls I have worked with (baby voice and all), is late for work. She is the type that seems to get away with everything with a head tilt mixed with an insincere “I’m soorrryyyy!” and a pouty lip that's selfie ready. But, she does seem to have fun every moment of every day no matter what. I am a little jealous of that. When little miss drama gets bitch slapped at work, we have our case! She is obviously murdered but we will have to wait on the why and when.

Meanwhile at bromance pad-well, I hate to say I told you so but to my friends (actually I think most of them agreed)-I knew Major wouldn’t lose his memory. We join Ravi and Major the next morning after the intense Liv-Major (Lajor? Miv?) love scene and proclamations from the night before. Ravi is quizzing him on his memory as he shoves every bit of food his mouth can contain. Zombies really miss eating! One of the memory flash cards he quizzes him on has a picture of Minor! I forgot about Minor! I hope he is happy and found his forever home!

Liv is happy but has to get home not quite ready to have the talk about last night. It’s complicated.

TEAM BLEYTON

Over at the girl’s place, Peyton and Blaine are full on domesticated.

She’s cooking him bacon!

That’s love people! Liv still has her Viagra Visions which leads to duty being called, and she heads to the crime scene where Yvonne, our party girl, lies dead in the bathtub. There is a hair dryer in the tub, but it’s no suicide. Clive notices a piece broken off the dryer and a chipped tile which indicates someone threw it in. They talk to the homebody roommate who seems to be the complete opposite of our victim. She shows them Yvonne's messy room (which looks a lot like mine) and explains she was living soap opera with this girl. Good luck with these Drama Queen brains Liv! (And to everyone around you)!

Back at the lab, Liv does her thing and the techno music starts. It might not be techno but I am old and cannot differentiate between all this new dance music that sounds the same. So, Ravi and Clive now get to deal with Club Girl brain. Liv can’t find her cell phone so she asks in an ultra-whiny voice for Ravi to call it.

It literally rings in the dead body they have sewn up!

Liv and Clive visit the victim’s work to watch video of the earlier bitch slap, but Liv is only concerned to learn Yvonne was a DJ. Seems like everyone is these days!

“…hashtag my kind of cool bitch!”-Liv

Major and Ravi play video games and discuss girls etc. Liv arrives and Ravi gives her an update but she is distracted.

“This case I’m solving, I think she was killed for being AWESOME! Murdered by haters, literally!”- Liv

Ravi informs Liv  Major isn’t remembering certain things and then asks Liv is she ran her errand earlier.

Ravi, are you dense? Why would you ask Liv on these brains to run an important errand right now?

We head over to The Scratching post where Don E, (I’ve been spelling it Donnie this whole season but someone just corrected me…thank you Mary), is trying to console a customer about his new zombie life. The guy is willing to pay a million dollars for a cure. Don E is intrigued.

Liv heads to her new spot…da club! Really, they are there for questioning but it’s more like Liv has been called home to the mothership. Clive asks the owner some questions and wants to talk to his wife, Trish who might know more but she is out running errands.

“You might remember me-I used to come here, Eighties Remix night? Oh, and also, we’re the police!” -Liv

Liv “questions” the bartender…

While Clive gets some history on Yvonne’s work habits…Liv decides to pump up the volume.

Don’t quit your day job Liv…seriously. Liv starts to get her  party on which is making Clive extremely anxious. Possibly because she is drinking Vodka straight from the bottle and proceeds to empty it? While searching in the stockroom for more booze she comes across the elusive Trish, who also happens to be the slapper from the store camera.

“Hashtag case closed!” -Liv

Trish claims her innocence and says she was only hiding in the stockroom because she knew they would recognize her from the slap. Reason for the slap? Apparently, party-girl Yvonne slept with her husband, the club owner. Not cool club dude! He does have an alibi, a girl called Jen, specifically “oops I forgot my bra-Jen.” Trish has an alibi also- involving a little revenge sex of her own.

Liv shows up to check on Major. He is in the middle of writing letters to people in case his memory doesn’t stick. She reminds him to write to 2 people I don’t know. His parents?

“This is so totally a moment, right? And you won’t even remember…” -Liv

After they kiss, Major tries to tell her something but she wants to preserve the moment with no words; with silent purity.  But then she takes a selfie. OMG!

Major boards a bus to Walla Walla. I guess that’s where he is from. Are people really from Walla Walla? So, wild guess- he is going to see his parents.

Back at Bleyton land, Blaine is cooking for Peyton now and Peyton is working on the dominatrix case from last week. Liv remembers she needs to get the blue juice ingredients for Ravi and prints it out on Peyton’s printer. Liv gets a vision of Yvonne’s nice coworker yelling at her and rushes out to question him without her print out, which puts it in the hands of Blaine.

Hmmmm….

Back at the lab, Ravi is still waiting for Liv to get it together when he gets a surprise visit from Don E whom tells him about the customer who wants the cure for a million dollars. Ravi reminds him the cure has the memory issues and Don E offers his “Blaine’s a faker” theory we have all been musing over forever. He happens makes a heap of sense-weirdly. Blaine’s problems DID all go away after he “lost” his memory. Ravi continues to try to reach imprudent Liv when Peyton shows up to discuss the dom case. He actually tries to hide from her from a second. Poor Ravi!

After about a nano second of thought, he decides to tackle the Blaine faking theory with Peyton even though he just blew it off with Don E. But, he does give her something to stew on. If Blaine IS faking that means the cure works and that would mean everything; especially to her best friend. Peyton’s not having it though, or she’s enjoying her denial.

“I just wanted you to hear.” -Ravi

“And I did.”-Peyton

Hashtag Awkward! Oh great, now I am starting to chatter like Liv…new brains please!

Back at the station, Clive is checking alibis and Liv is carping about creepy nice guys. Liv gets another vision of Yvonne dumping out her purse. Just like her room, her purse looks just like mine! Yvonne was at a pawn shop trying to sell a collectible baseball.

Back at the lab, Ravi still seems to be attempting to count on Liv to get the ingredients for the blue solution. Ravi, get it yourself!!!

Liv is supposed to be watching Major as well so they rush over to their place to check on him but realize he and his bags are gone.

In Walla Walla a police officer knocks on a woman’s door and informs her a young man was wandering around the bus station. It seems he doesn’t know who or where he is. Oh no! Major is in the police car and the woman recognizes him.

At the funeral home, Peyton brings Blaine food. They really do revel in the eating! Peyton imparts her conversation with Ravi to an unphased Blaine who quickly changes the subject. She also tells him that Major took the cure which definitely peaks his interest. Peyton says she is so happy with him, she doesn’t think she would care even if he had gotten his memory back. Blaine comes clean.

“Major’s gonna get his memory back…and the good news doesn’t stop there. This is me.” -Blaine

Bombshell! Blaine HAS been faking. He tells her you do lose your memory at first but then it snaps back fairly quickly. So, my theory was wrong. I really though he had only gained it back last weekend. He’s a good actor! He tells her he did it so he could change his life, change who he was and the way people viewed him.

“Well it worked, you’ve made a fool of me.” -Peyton

Back is Walla Walla, Major awakes in his childhood bedroom. He recognizes his mother so Blaine was telling the truth.

Peyton goes to tell the news to Ravi and Liv, that Major will be okay because he will get his memory back soon. The cure works!

“So, what do you say Liv? Ready to be human again?” -Ravi

Of course she is!

Back at the lab there has been a break in. Of course…Don E anyone???

Clive is still at the police station questioning the co-worker which this leads him to the mousy roommate. Who cares who killed Yvonne??? I want to know about the cure whereabouts! Anyway, all roads lead back to the valuable baseball. Kind of saw that one coming. It’s always the quiet innocent ones, isn’t it? Yvonne pawned her roommate’s baseball and replaced it with a fake one. So, she killed the bitch because of it-plus she annoyed the bloody hell out of her. I think a light sentence is justifiable. Hashtag minimum sentence in a low security prison?

Back at the lab, not soon enough I might add, Peyton suspects Blaine, Ravi suspects Don E and Liv is just tremendously depressed. WAIT! Ravi remembers there is still one dose left! The one he gave to Major just in case. He never used it!

Clive arrives with his confession thanks to Liv’s vision which leads me to believe Clive will not be happy losing his best asset. But I am wrong…Clive is a good guy and just wants Liv to be happy and get her life back.

Back to Blaine, he doesn’t seem to have cure syringes- but he does seem to be drowning his sorrows and using Liv’s print out to make the blue juice complete with his forgotten little smirk. What are his plans now I wonder?

Major returns and they attack him for the final dose! But, oh no- he doesn’t have it. He gave it to someone. To who? We shall find out!

FIND OUT NEXT WEEK!

Episode grade: 8 1/2 It was remarkable, as always, but Liv’s brain did get a little much and the case they worked on was pretty lackluster.

[what-do-1000-swords-look-like]

Holy crap this episode was funny as hell until it wasn't and then we were plunged right back into the intensity. But great episode!!! I don't lb so I don't get spoilers but man I had a lot of reactions as I watched. Ngl, a lot of cursing and caps ahead but damn was this such a good episode:

“One minute before the blackout” - now we’re to 1 minute from 1 week last week

“The place where this heart’s from, it was a tragedy. But once we land, it’s gonna turn into a miracle, right?” “Yeah, I like that” -- so once we land and settle after all of this craziness, a tragedy will turn into a miracle? I like that *looking at you Eddie*

EDDIE GET OUT OF THAT CHOPPER RN, DO NOT DO THIS TO ME AFTER SEASON 4, DO NOT!!!

Bobby going in to save the heart, hmm...

Oh, thank God - Eddie, Hen, and Bobby are all safe

Dr. Salazar - we need more of her. I love her so much.

4 Days later - hmm...

Wow, they’re really bringing Harry to the forefront here, this whole kidnapping thing is going to happen isn't it?

Harry charging neighbors and Michael and David in a sort of co-parent situation - first of all, Harry you are a GENIUS and love that Michael and David with Harry are being focused on in this episode, ahem, is there possibly a reason...?

Lou survived!!!! THANK GOD

Nearly 5 days Lou was in hospital

5 day head start for Hudson - is there something with 1, 3, 4 and now 5? I'm keeping track here, Tim

Buck is the power czar LOL - omg I love this man so much

Ravi!!! We need MORE Ravi!!! but where is Albert???

CHIMNEY!!!!! OMG I LOVE YOU - "Give me a charger or Uncle Buck will never see his niece again" - "Give him a charger" - "Well played" - "Let this be a lesson, never give that man a clipboard" - "Excuse me for being efficient" - "That’s one word for what you are" - okay #1 I will forever be in love with Chimney, probably one of my top favorite characters on this show & #2 LOVE this whole brothers interaction, Albert may not be there but Buck and Chim are still going with the whole older-brother-is-exasperated-with-the-younger-brother's-shit vibe

Oh God, here comes more cringe, yay... not so much

Eddie kisses Ana on the cheek AGAIN (Eddie, can you hear me? This is your subconscious speaking, when are you going to end this, my man?)

Ana says going to visit was Christopher’s idea since he missed Eddie and thought he was hungry - muy interesante

Buck rushing over to greet Christopher and hugging him tight is a moment I live for - outside of the whole Buck and Eddie story, I LOVE this relationship with all of my heart, I am so glad Christopher has Buck, he really is his second dad (with or without Eddie being involved)

Eddie not introducing Ana to Ravi (nor Buck saying hi) - Buck’s expression - “You must be Eddie’s wife” Christopher: “Not yet” I FUCKING LOVE THIS KID, OKAY!!!! Buck’s smile, he loves Christopher, too - love how Ana and Eddie don't say anything to dispel or clarify this

SAME FUCKING TRIGGER AND THIS TIME BUCK SEES IT!!!! OMG (Eddie, this is your subconscious again, you need to listen! The universe and I are trying to tell you something, please before any more shit hits the fan like me having to watch more uncomfortable interactions between you and your placeholder friend!)

Eddie sending Ana and Christopher on a tour with Ravi IN THE DARK at his work place so he can put SALADS AWAY

Buck’s expressions the entire time - Buck knows something's up

Ana’s expressions the entire time - she KNOWS

Thank God Bobby wasn’t around - hear me out, I have a reason for this that I am still working on in this long ass meta

Buck makes sure to not make eye contact with Ana (except quickly when Ravi is waiting to be introduced), even when Ana laughs at his “Constantly”

Eddie being a probie when Shannon came back in season 2 (and Eddie pulled her into the locker room to talk) & Ana being left to tour the station house with Ravi aka Probie - hello parallels & contrasts, my old friend

“I don’t want these things to wilt” - interesting choice of wording there, Eddie (newsflash, it's already wilting, Eddie)

I almost feel a little bad for Ana here because she did do something nice and she gets the brushoff and some discomfort/embarrassment in return (I mean the woman brought three salads in the middle of a blackout that she most likely made herself, come on - I'm sure some people think salads are easy to make but to those of us in the inexperienced/uninitiated cooks' club, it's not that simple)

Lila dead - hmm...are we surprised? (Hudson didn't give a fig about her and what's sad is Lou would have saved her)

“I think she was smitten like those other fools. I think she saw him being led away in cuffs and she intervened on his behalf” - interesting line there, Athena...

I need more scenes with Athena and Elaine - I know Elaine is the captain and Athena is on her own with no partner but I gotta say I am enjoying this

Athena! Why are you not warning the survivors!!! I mean I get it but still!!!

OMG “He takes Christopher all the time, he’s got the place memorized” - BUCK LISTENED TO EDDIE IN 3x03 - OMG!!!

Oh Buck my poor baby, he knows what they’re walking into - I LOVE Hen’s line of “Just smile, Buck” and then Eddie and Chim both smile wide at him - OMG I AM LIVING FOR THESE SCENES WITH THE 118

“Welcome to the Jungle” - nice touch 911

OMG Buck you are cracking me up - no animals are getting past him

1 hawk or eagle or raptor maybe? I’m not good with bird species okay!!!

3 emus again

1 bird I have no idea what kind (wondering if that’s what we saw the back of last episode near the emus)

Giraffe again

3 wolves

3 camels

Elephant

“The animal makes a move, control it” - YOU GOT THIS BUCK (yes we are finally getting that scene we saw filmed!!!)

Buck’s expression when the camel runs by is KILLING ME 'yeah, that's right Camel, back up, back up, you don't want any of this, yeah that's right'

Stuffed animals in the souvenir store, interesting

2 for $5 sign - even more interesting

1 alpaca

I guess I kind of wonder why Hen didn’t become a vet at one point in her life? Like I’m glad she’s a first responder and about to be a doctor but damn she knows so much about animals, she’s like the 118’s resident animal expert, that’s my girl

“We were gonna get one” - um...what? Hen...

“I wouldn’t” LOL oh Bobby you slay me

Is it just me or do we hear ET almost type music in the background as Hen lays chips down for the alpaca? Bobby mentioning the Reese’s Pieces, the flashlight shining on the Alpaca when it steps into view...are we getting an ET reference?

“It’s calling its friend!” *another Alpaca appears through coats “Clever girl” - a Jurassic Park reference - It’s a fucking Steven Spielberg reference, holy shit!!!!

Okay so that scene was Eddie looking over at Bobby, got it, near the fire trucks

Oh Buck I love you so much “So you ran from an Alpaca?” “Two Alpacas and no one was running” - both Buck’s and Eddie’s faces and then laughter are freaking hilarious

Chimney: “After careful consideration, I have decided not to endorse this park” - OMG I have not stopped laughing for like five minutes straight, can you imagine a Jurassic Park AU for this team? - shot of T-rex above Ripley’s Believe It Or Not (nice one, 911)

Weird looking bird that I've never seen before and 2 emus and 2 vulture, 1 hawk/raptor bird, 1 rhino

May is awesome!!! And so are those neighbors!!!!

Eddie in the tank top!!! Buck with a clipboard!!!

“Hey are you sleeping or just pretending?” Buck is taking no prisoners today

Buck is trying to make sure he’s not having any symptoms, omg, seriously how do you not love this guy???? Eddie you better make an honest man out of him soon, I'm not sure how much longer I can take this

“You don’t give up, do you?” Oh Eddie you did not just say that, to Buck of all people, come on man (hello season 3 Eddie, my old friend)

Get him, Buck! Get him!

“Since when do you panic?” “That’s what I said, I don’t panic” Buck once again out there proving that he knows Eddie better than anyone else

Oh wow!!! Eddie came right out and said it “If I’m being honest with myself I think it was Ana”

And there it is folks “She’s been a constant through all of this, staying with Christopher”

“Somehow we became a ready made family and I don’t know if I’m ready for that” - wow, this is an excellent scene, he’s totally letting that wall down to talk candidly with Buck, nice - and him being stripped down to a tank top for this scene just reiterates that fact, he's baring some things

“I think I’m gonna stick it out. Ana’s the first woman I’ve wanted to spend this much time with since Shannon” - oh Eddie, you really need to shit or get off the pot my friend, this isn’t good for you, Christopher or Ana - how can you sentence all three of you to this? come on

“My kid loves her” but YOU DON'T - okay my heart is breaking, Eddie is making the same goddamn mistake all over again just like we predicted - Eddie please, what did Carla just say to you three episodes ago? Where the hell is Carla btw????

“Stick it out? That’s not the way you talk about someone you’re in love with” “That enough?” - thank you Buck, seriously THANK YOU

Okay my heart just broke again but for Buck this time “Eddie, I have been Ana” - aww =( I love my chaotic firefighter son with all of my heart

And of course Denial!Eddie aka repressed!Eddie are back, sigh - 5x03 has to be where it all comes to a head, it has to be, now even Buck is forcing him to face what he's trying so hard not to - word of advice Eddie, my repressed firefighter son, you can try to deny it mentally/emotionally all you want but it will come out one way or another, just like it's coming out in panic attack symptoms and anxiety - you have to end this, sweetie

And I think it’s very interesting that Eddie looks right at Buck during “If I’m being honest with myself” *looks away then right back at Buck* “I think it was Ana”, “staying with Christopher”, then right after “I don’t know if I’m ready for that”, “I think I’m gonna stick it out”, “Ana’s the first woman I’ve wanted to spend this much time with since Shannon” “My kid loves her”

OMG Eddie’s expression when Buck says “I know what it’s like to be in love with someone who’s not all the way in and deep down you know it and it hurts. It hurts worse than the truth” — RYAN WHERE IS YOUR GODDAMN EMMY??? If anyone ever doubted that Eddie was in love with Buck, there’s the freaking proof written all over Eddie’s face at Buck’s line!!! It’s not something he thinks he can have and it hurts

Okay seriously, Eddie saying “Ana’s the first woman I’ve wanted to spend this much time with Shannon” — VERY PURPOSEFUL MENTION OF A WOMAN HE’S WANTED TO SPEND TIME WITH, EDDIE PLEASE, CAN YOU HEAR ME!!!!

Then they go right to Chim calling Maddie, uh huh, I see you 911

I really love Hen’s full support of Maddie btw & I love how Chim is able to talk to Hen about it all

Oh no!!! Maddie please don’t fall asleep!!!

Oh thank God!!!! It’s going to be okay, Maddie, you got her, it’s going to be okay - I seriously want to give my girl a hug and tell her it's going to be okay

Omg Jee-Yun is so cute!!!

Day 4 or day 5 hmmm - I'm still keeping track, Tim

“Why is it every time the world ends, it ends some more?” “It just keeps us on our toes” “More like knocks us on our asses” - Universe is that you?

Awww Bobby just called Athena “baby” <3 I'm not crying, you're crying

YES more Athena and Elaine

Lou is awake!!!!

Awww Lou =( I may or may not be ugly crying rn

I cannot tell you how relieved I am that Lou is alive

Oh God!!!! Athena get the cops there now!!!!

Yeah you should have let Harry charge them Michael lol, of course they were there to just use the generator power (though I love and appreciate the contrast they gave us in the neighbors who helped the boy with the ventilator so we know not all people take advantage)

OH NO GET AWAY FROM HARRY YOU BASTARD!!!!

On a side note, it’s nice to see more Michael and David but at what cost, Tim? Can we please get more of them and especially David in a more lighthearted episode for crying out loud? Is that too much to ask???

Go Bobby!!!!

Good for you, Athena!!!

Omg this is practically Athena’s nightmare come to life, shit

Omg Hudson unplugged the goddamn generator, THAT FUCKING ASSHOLE!!!

HARRY!!!!!!

I’M SORRY BUT ARE YOU TELLING ME THERE’S NO BOLO WITH A PICTURE ON THIS GUY?!!? - oh right, no power, but STILL

Okay that was super intense, I really hope Athena is the one to take Hudson down, just like Bobby said

I have a few more rewatches to do before breaking things down but damn, I think I need a drink after that one.