#Richard Dinsdale

[claudia1829things]

"THE BUCCANEERS" (1995) Review

"THE BUCCANEERS" (1995) Review

Years ago, I had anticipating watching for the first time, "THE BUCCANEERS", the 1995 television adaptation of Edith Wharton’s last novel. After all, I have been a major fan of "THE AGE OF INNOCENCE", Martin Scorcese’s 1993 adaptation of Wharton’s award-winning 1920 novel for years. But my eager anticipating nearly ebbed away, when I discovered that "THE BUCCANEERS" only managed to rouse a lukewarm reception from many television critics.

The five-part miniseries turned out to be an unusual production from the BBC. One, it was based upon a novel written by an American author – namely Edith Wharton. There have been other British television productions based upon the literary works of an American, but they are very rare. Another interesting aspect of Wharton’s "The Age of Innocence" is that the author did not finish it, due to her death at the age of 75. Fifty-six years later, Wharton scholar Marion Mainwaring finished the novel, which was published by Viking. Around the same time, the BBC hired screenwriter Maggie Wadey to adapt and finish the novel for the television adaptation. As a result the novel has two slightly different endings. Another aspect of this miniseries that struck me as unusual was that instead of hiring British actresses to portray four of the five leads, the BBC hired four Amercian actresses – Carla Gugino, Mira Sorvino, Alison Elliott and Rya Kihlstedt.

The plotline for "THE BUCCANEERS" is very simple. The story begins in 1873 Newport, Rhode Island; in which two sisters of a noveau riche businessman and their two friends are introduced – Virginia "Ginny" and Annabel "Nan" St. George, Conchita "Connie" Closson and Elizabeth "Lizzy" Elmsworth. Whereas the Brazilian born Conchita manages to snare Lord Richard Marabel, the dissolute second son of the Marquess of Brightlingsea, the other three girls struggle to find a place amongst the members of old New York society. When a prank committed by Ginny and Lizzy backfires, Nan’s English governess Laura Testvalley proposes to Mrs. St. George that Ginny and Nan have a London season amongst the upper-class British. She argues that their acceptance by the British high society would assure them a place amongst the upper-class New Yorkers. Due to their friendship with the vibrant Conchita, Virginia and Annabel are introduced to Lord Richard’s family – the impoverished Brightlingseas and their neighbors, the equally impoverished Sir Helmsey Thwaite and his son Guy. As they get settled to conquer British society, Ginny and Nan are surprised by the arrival of Lizzy, who has arrived in Britain for her own season.

Although the girls’ original purpose for visiting Britain was to enjoy a London season, a friend of Laura Testvalley has other plans for them. Thirty years earlier, the American born Jackie March had been engaged to a British aristocrat – namely the very young Lord Brightlingsea, who abandoned her at the altar. Miss March remained in Britain and became something of a sponsor/matchmaker for young society girls. It was Miss March who recommended that the visiting Americans rent a villa owned by one of her former sponsors, Lady Idina Hutton. She also recommended that the girls do more than just enjoy a London season in order to impress old New York society. She recommended that they consider marrying into upper-class British society. Miss March’s plans eventually come to fruition:

*Virginia or namely her father’s wealth attracted the attention of Lady Idina Hutton’s lover and Lord Richard’s older brother, Lord Seadown.

*Lizzy ended up marrying a self-made aspiring politician named Hector Robinson

*Annabel fell in love with Guy Thwaite, but ended up marrying the very wealthy Julian Folyat, Duke of Trevennick; when Guy left Britain to find his fortune in South America.

As I had stated earlier, most critics were not initially kind to "THE BUCCANEERS". Most British critics dismissed it as a costumed soap opera of the second-rate kind, with an ending that had been "Hollywoodized" (happy ending). These same critics also accused the miniseries of mocking the British aristocracy. The American critics, at least those who considered themselves Wharton purists, accused the miniseries’ screenwriter, Maggie Waddey, of changing the elements of the author’s story by including topics such as marital rape and homosexuality. Personally, I found all of these arguments irrelevant. Most dramas about personal lives – whether first-rate or not – tend to possess soap-operish elements. This hostility toward soap operas has always struck me as infantile and irrelevant. And why are all Hollywood productions guilty of having a happy ending, when that has not been the case? Other literary works and their adaptations have mocked the British aristocracy. Why was there such a big hullabaloo over how the aristocracy was portrayed in this particular story? As for the additions of marital rape and homosexuality, these elements did no harm to the story, as far as I am concerned. And I must admit that I have become increasingly weary of demands that all movie or television adaptations should be completely faithful to their literary source. Such demands strike me as impractical.

My complaints about "THE BUCCANEERS" are very few. In fact, I only have two. The first time I ever saw actress Gwen Humble on the television screen was in a miniseries called "THE REBELS", an adaptation of a John Jakes novel. Although I had no problems with her performance in that particular production, I must admit that I had a problem with her performance as Virginia and Annabel’s mother, Mrs. St. George. I understand that Mrs. St. George was supposed to be a shallow and somewhat silly woman. But I feel that Humble went a little too far in conveying those certain traits. Her performance struck me as exaggerated and a little amateurish. Another problem I had with "THE BUCCANEERS" is a rather minor one. It has to do with Virginia’s husband, Lord Seadown. His father is a marquess – which is ranked somewhere between a duke and an earl (count). As the eldest son, he is entitled to a courtesy title. But what was Seadown’s courtesy title? His younger brother was called Lord Richard Marable, which is correct for the younger son of a marquess. The courtesy title for the eldest son of a marquess is usually an earldom – namely Earl of Something. Was Seadown’s name a courtesy title - Earl of Seadown? Or was he supposed to be regarded as Lord Seadown Marable? If the latter, what was the courtesy title he used? I found it all slightly confusing.

However, "THE BUCCANEERS" has been one of my all time favorite miniseries, ever since I first saw it. And there is so much about it that has made it such a favorite of mine. One, producer-director Philip hired a production crew that did justice to Wharton’s story. The miniseries featured some elegant locations that served as the story’s various settings. Some of these locations included Castle Howard, Burghley House and Newport, Rhode Island. I also enjoyed Remi Adefarasin’s photography. It had a deep and rich color that did justice to a story filled with emotions and passion. Colin Towns provided an elegant and entertaining score that remained memorable for me, since the first time I heard it years ago. But it was Rosalind Ebbutt’s costumes that really blew my mind. She provided exquisitely outfits that were beautiful and elegant – especially those for the lead actresses. More importantly, her costumes not only reflected the fashions wore by the American and British upper-classes during the 1870s, they also reflected the change in the main characters’ status and in women’s fashion throughout the decade, as the following photographs show:

Another one of the major virtues of "THE BUCCANEERS" turned out to be its cast. Wharton’s novel is filled with interesting characters. And Saville and his casting director did an excellent job in finding the right actor/actress for the right role. Aside from Gwen Humble’s portrayal of Mrs. St. George, there were so many first-rate performances in the miniseries that it would take me another article just to describe them. But the supporting performances that stood out for me came from the likes of Sheila Hancock, whose portrayal of the Dowager Duchess of Trevenick struck me as an expert mixture of cool haughtiness, sharp wisdom and long suffering; Michael Kitchen, who skillfully conveyed both the charming and shallow nature of Sir Helmsley Thwaite; Jenny Agutter, who was excellent as Lady Idina Hatton, Lord Seadown’s insecure and tragic mistress; Dinsdale Landen and Rosemary Leach, who both portrayed the Marquess and Marchioness of Brightlingsea with a mixture of class haughtiness, charm and great humor; Peter M. Goetz, who seemed to personify the self-made 19th century American businessman; and Connie Booth, who gave one of her best performances as the ambitious and sharp-minded Jackie March.

Richard Huw gave a humorous, yet intelligent performance as Hector Robinson, the ambitious young Member of Parliament who ends up winning Lizzy Elmsworth’s hand. And Mark Tandy was pretty solid as Lord Brightlingsea’s heir, the mercenary Lord Seadown who marries Virginia for Colonel St. George’s money. I was very impressed by Ronan Vibert’s portrayal of the dissolute Lord Richard Marabel, Conchita’s husband and Lord Brightlingsea’s younger son. But the two male performances that really impressed me came from Greg Wise and James Frain. The latter portrayed the haughty Julian Duke of Trevenick, who manages to win the hand Annabel St. George (much to the surprise of her governess), before alienating her with his lack of skills as a husband. Frain could have easily portrayed Julian as a one-note villain, especially when one considers the act of marital rape that his character committed against his wife in Episode Three. Being the skillful actor that he is, Frain conveyed all facets of Julian’s personality – both the good and the bad. And his assertion near the end of Episode Four that he is "not a monster" may have been one of Frain’s finest moments on screen. Greg Wise probably gave one of what I consider to be three of his best career performances in his portrayal of Guy Thwaite, Sir Helmsley’s only son. His Guy could have been one of your typical handsome, romantic heroes. But Wise did an excellent job in revealing how Guy’s insecurities regarding his lack of funds led him to lose Annabel to Julian. And he also conveyed how in the throes of love, Guy could be a slightly selfish man with no thought to how his "friendship" with Annabel might affect her social standing. Thanks to Wise’s performance, his Guy Thwaite proved to be equally complex.

We finally come to our five leads in the story – the four American heiresses and Annabel St. George’s English governess, Laura Testvalley. I have noticed that whenever someone brings up Cheri Lunghi, he or she inevitable brings up her role in "THE BUCCANEERS", the Anglo-Italian governess Miss Testvalley. I certainly cannot blame them. Lunghi proved to be the glue that held the story together, skillfully serving as its eyes and narrator at the beginning of each episode. Rya Kihlstedt gave a charming and solid performance as the blunt and level-headed Lizzy Elmsworth, who seemed more impressed by Hector Robinson’s ambitions than any aristocrat. She and Richard Huw managed to create a very credible screen presence. Alison Elliott’s Virginia St. George proved to be one of the most complicated characters in the story. Thanks to the actress’ excellent performance, she conveyed Virginia’s haughtiness and obsession with being connected to an aristocratic family; and at the same time, garnered sympathy by expressing the character’s love for her husband and disappointment upon discovering that he had only married her for money. And less than a year before she won her Academy Award, Mira Sorvino proved just how first-rate she could be as an actress in her portrayal of the Brazilian-born Conchita Closson. Her Conchita was a delicious and complicated minx torn by her desire for the luxurious and glamorous lifestyle of the British aristocracy and her contempt for what she deemed as their cold personalities. If Cheri Lunghi’s Laura Testvalley was the story’s eyes and narrator, Carla Gugino’s Annabel St. George aka the Duchess of Trevenick proved to be the heart and soul of "THE BUCCANEERS". Thanks to Gugino’s superb performance, the actress literally transformed Nan from the childish and naïve sixteen year-old girl, to the bewildered nineteen year-old bride and finally to the weary twenty-one year-old wife, disappointed by a failed marriage and in love with another man. There are times that I wondered if any other actress could have accomplished what she did. It seemed a pity that none of the major television and critics awards organizations never acknowledged her performance with a nomination.

Many critics have heaped a great deal of scorn upon Maggie Wadey’s adaptation of Wharton’s novel. Frankly, I believe this scorn was undeserved. I may not have been that impressed by her other works, but I honestly believe that "THE BUCCANEERS" was her masterpiece by far. Many accused her of failing to adapt Wharton’s "spirit" or "style" by including marital rape and homosexuality into the story. Since both topics where added without any tasteless sensationalism, I had no problems with these additions. And Wadey also made sure to give the story’s happy ending something of a bittersweet edge. Despite leaving Julian for the man she loved, Guy Thwaite, Annabel found herself ostracized by society and especially by her sister Virginia – as was proven at the Marquess of Brightlingsea’s funeral. Annabel and Guy’s elopement also left the latter disinherited by his father, Sir Helmsley. And her assistance in the elopement left Laura Testvalley rejected by Sir Helmsley and unemployed. So much for the "happy ending". Because the story revolved around four American heiresses marrying into the British upper-classes, "THE BUCCANEERS" also proved to be an interesting study in culture clash between two Western nations in the mid-to-late nineteenth century. But in all of the articles I have read about the miniseries, I find it surprising that no one has bothered to noticed that the topic of the continuing decline of the British aristocracy was also mentioned . . . more than once. It almost became a secondary theme. The Brightlingseas’ interest in the St. George family certainly seemed an indication that they were more willing to marry money – regardless from where it came – rather than find a way to earn it. This seemed like a far cry from Guy Thwaite, who preferred to create his own wealth with two years in South America, rather than marry it. And the character of the Marquess of Brightlingsea literally became a symbol of the aristocracy’s decline in scenes like a heated conversation between him and Hector Robinson; and a speech by Guy Thwaite to the House of Commons during a montage that featured of his death.

Now that I think about it, why should I care what others feel about "THE BUCCANEERS"? Every time I watch it, I always fall in love with the miniseries over and over again. Maggie Wadey wrote an excellent adaptation of Wharton’s novel – probably her best work or masterpiece, as far as I am concerned. Led by the likes of Carla Gugino, Cheri Lunghi, Greg Wise and James Frain, the cast proved to be first-rate. And Philip Saville did justice to both the cast and Wadey’s screenplay in his direction of the miniseries.

[motionpicturelover]

"Hamlet" (1996) - Kenneth Branagh

"February Film Favourites" 8/28 (1/2)

Full film on Archive.org.

[randomrichards]

THREADS:

Small town feels effects

Of nuclear explosion

A Cold War nightmare

[kwebtv]

The Guardians -  ITV  -  July 10 - October 2, 1971

Sci Fi / Political Thriller (13 episodes)

Running Time:  60 minuutes

Stars:

Edward Petherbridge as Christoper Hobson

Derek Smith as Dennis Norman

John Collin as Tom Weston

Cyril Luckham as Sir Timothy Hobson

Lynn Farleigh as Eleanor Benedict

David Burke as Dr. Benedict

Gwyneth Powell as Clare Weston

Robin Ellis as Peter Lee

Robert Morris as Inspector Arnold

Peter Howell as Geoff Hollis

Joan Heal as Miss Joan Quarmby

Dinsdale Landen as Dr. Mark Thorn

Anthony Bate as Raymond Barry

Graham Crowden as The Dirtiest Man

Richard Vernon as Dace

Michael Culver as Paul

Richard Hurndall as Sir Francis Wainwright

Robert Russell as Gibb

John Bryans as Bullmore

John Rhys-Davies as First Guardian

James Grout as Hobbs

Peter Barkworth as Quarmby

Ken Hutchison as Second Guardian

Windsor Davies as Shop Steward

[ludojudoposts]

RIP Eric Chappell

[fourorfivemovements]

Films Watched in 2019:

70. Rasputin: The Mad Monk (1966) - Dir. Don Sharp

[thegeeksideofthemoon]

[rp-kat]

Sacrilege

1998

Thrash'em All  #5

[davidosu87]

[thenighttrain]

books read in 2020

i’ve been keeping a list and decided i want it on my blog too! everything is on my goodreads too. follow my book blog @thesonofneptune​! bolded are my favourites 

Middlegame by Seanan McGuire ★★★★

Stardust by Neil Gaiman ★★★

Into The Drowning Deep by Mira Grant ★★★★

Heart of Flames (Crown of Feathers #2) by Nicki Pau Preto ★★★★

Reverie by Ryan La Sala ★★

Crown of Feathers (Crown of Feathers #1) by Nicki Pau Preto ★★★

Soul in Darkness by Wendy Higgins ★★★

The King’s Dragon (Fire and Valor #1) by W.M. Fawkes ★★★★

Blue on Blue by Dal Maclean ★★★★

The Calculating Stars (Lady Astronaut #1) by Mary Robinette Kowal ★★★★

The Watchmaker of Filligree Street (The Watchmaker of Filligree Street #1) by Natasha Pulley ★★★

The Lost Future of Pepperharrow (The Watchmaker of Filligree Street #2) by Natasha Pulley ★★★★

The Bedlam Stacks by Natasha Pulley ★★★

Gods of Jade and Shadow by Silvia Garcia-Moreno ★★★★

Girls of Paper and Fire (Girls of Paper and Fire #1) by Natasha Ngan ★★★

The Prince’s Dragon (Fire and Valor #2) by W.M. Fawkes ★★★★

House of Salt and Sorrows by Erin A. Craig ★

The House of Binding Thorns (Dominion of the Fallen #2) by Aliette de Bodard ★★★

The House of Sundering Flames (Dominion of the Fallen #3) by Alliette de Bodard ★★★

The City of Brass (The Daevabad Trilogy #1) by S.A. Chakraborty ★★★

The Catch Trap by Marion Zimmer Bradley ★★★★

The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes (The Hunger Games #0) by Suzanne Collins ★★★

Of Dragons, Feasts and Murders (Dominion of the Fallen, #3.5) by Aliette de Bodard ★★★★

The Last Smile in Sunder City (The Fetch Phillips Archives #1) by Luke Arnold ★★★★

Northern Wrath (The Hanged God Trilogy #1) by Thilde Kold Holdt ★★★

The Unspoken Name (The Serpent Gates #1) by A.K. Larkwood ★★★

Infernal by Mark de Jager ★★★

The City We Became (Great Cities #1) by N.K. Jemisin ★★★

Gideon the Ninth (The Locked Tomb #1) by Tamsyn Muir ★★★

Deathless (Leningrad Diptych #1) by Catherynne M. Valente ★★★

The Poppy War (The Poppy War #1) by R.F. Kuang ★★★★★

The Dragon Republic (The Poppy War #2) by R.F. Kuang ★★★★

Foundryside (The Founders Trilogy #1) by Robert Jackson Bennett ★★★

Rivers of London (Rivers of London #1) by Ben Aaronovitch ★★★

The Pearl That Broke Its Shell by Nadia Hashimi ★★★★

The Deep by Rivers Solomon ★★★

Ashes of the Sun (Burninngblade & Silvereye #1) by Django Wexller ★★★

The Century’s Scribe (A Fantastic Decade #1) by Brendan Walsh ★★★★

Red, White & Royal Blue by Casey McQuistonn ★★★

The Four Profound Weaves by R.B. Lembergg ★★★

A Very Large Expanse of Sea by Tahereh Mafi ★★★

Blazewrath Games by Amparo Ortiz ★★★★

The House in the Cerulean Sea by T.J. Klune ★★★★

The Sword of Kaigen by M.L. Wang ★★★★★

Jade City (The Green Bone Saga #1) by Fonda Lee ★★★★

Jade War (The Green Bone Saga #2) by Fonda Lee ★★★★

The Night Tiger by Yangsze Choo ★★★

The Rage of Dragons (The Burning #1) by Evan Winter ★★★

The Goblin Emperor (The Goblin Emperor #1) by Katherine Addison ★★★

The Conductors by Nicole Glover ★★★

The Wolf of Oren-Yaro (Chronicles of the Bitch Queen #1) by K.S. Villoso ★★★

When The Moon Is Low by Nadia Hashimi ★★★

The Ten Thousand Doors of January by Alix E. Harrow ★★★

Each of Us a Desert by Mark Oshiro ★★★★

White Silence (Elizabeth Cage #1) by Jodi Taylor ★★★

The Rook (The Checquy Files #1) by Daniel O’Malley ★★★★

The Vicar and the Rake (Society of Beasts #1) by Annabelle Greene ★★★

Lava Red Feather Blue by Molly Rinngle ★★★★

The Bone Shard Daughter (The Drowning Empire #1) by Andrea Stewart ★★★★

Alif the Unseen by G. Willow Wilson ★★★

Carter & Lovecraft (Carter & Lovecraft #1) by Jonathan L. Howard ★★★

A Good Girl’s Guide to Murder (A Good Girls’ Guide to Murder #1) by Holly Jackson ★★★★

The Bear and the Nightingale (Winternight Trilogy #1) by Katherine Arden ★★★★

The Girl in the Tower (Winternight Trilogy #2) by Katherine Arden ★★★★★

The Winter of the Witch (Winternight Trilogy #3) by Katherine Arden ★★★★

The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue by V.E. Schwab ★★★

Tower of Mud and Straw by Yaroslav Barsukov ★★★

Mexican Gothic by Silvia Garcia-Moreno ★★

Every Heart a Doorway (Wayward Children #1) by Seanan McGuire ★★★

The Changeling by Victor LaValle ★★★

Ring Shout by Djeli P Clark ★★★★

The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid ★★★★

The Year of the Witching by Alexis Henderson ★★★

We Are Okay by Nina LaCour ★★★

Dead Man in a Ditch (The Fetch Phillips Archives #2) by Luke Arnold ★★★

The Nightmare Thief (The Nightmare Thief #1) by Nicole Lesperance ★★★★

A Time of Dread (Of Blood and Bone #1) by John Gwynne ★★★★

Sleeping Giants (Themis Files #1) by Sylvain Neuvel ★★★

Dry by Neal Shusterman ★★★

Black Sun (Between Earth and Sky #1) by Rebecca Roanhorse ★★★★

The Searcher by Tana French ★★★★

Ink and Bone (The Great Library #1) by Rachel Caine ★★★

The Burning God (The Poppy War #3) by R.F. Kuang ★★★★

The Drowning Faith (The Poppy War 2.5) by R.F. Kuang ★★★★

The Henna Wars by Adiba Jaigirdar ★★★

Long Bright River by Liz Moore ★★

The Devil and the Dark Water by Stuart Turton ★★★★

Smoke and Stone by Michael R. Fletcher ★★★

A Memory Called Empire (Teixcalaan #1) by Arkady Martine ★★★

In Other Lands by Sarah Rees Brennan ★★★★

Piranesi by Susanna Clarke ★★★★

The Familiars by Stacey Halls ★★

A Man Called Ove by Fredrik Backman ★★★★

Kings of Paradise (Ash and Sand #1) by Richard Neil ★★★

Red Sister (Book of the Ancestor #1) by Mark Lawrence ★★★★

The Midnight Library by Matt Haig ★★★★

The Kingdom of Back by Marie Lu ★★★

Not Even Bones (Market of Monsters #1) by Rebecca Schaeffer ★★★

Real Life by Brandon Taylor ★★★

Godshot by Chelsea Bieker ★★★

The Toymakers by Robert Dinsdale ★★★

The Humans by Matt Haig ★★★★

My Dark Vanessa by Kate Elizabeth Russell ★★★★

The Travelling Cat Chronicles by Hiro Arikawa ★★★★

A Conspiracy of Truths by Alexandra Rowland ★★★

The Empress of Salt and Fortune (The Singing Hills Cycle #1) by Nghi Vo ★★

The Survivors by Jane Harper ★★★★

The Dry (Aaron Falk #1) by Jane Harper ★★★★

The Lost Man by Jane Harper ★★★

[motionpicturelover]

"Hamlet" (1996) - Kenneth Branagh

Films I've watched in 2022 (106/210)

[moschicane]

the adventure zone: graduation // summer and bird by catherine catmull // richie tozier's obituary // youth - glass animals // glue by richard siken // the toymakers by robert dinsdale // sheep - mt. joy // this must be the place - the killers // beartown by fredrick backman

[releasing-my-insanity]

Before season 4 started airing I felt like making a list of ACGAS 2020 characters who have appeared in four or more episodes as of the end of season 3. (Sorted by number of episodes as of s3, information from IMDB.)

I also put mark next to the characters who are on Radio Times' list of characters appearing in season 4. (This doesn't mean that anyone not marked won't appear. Just that Radio Times hasn't heard that they will. (The Radio Times list is already missing a new character that PBS put in their article.)

James Herriot: (21) * Helen Alderson Herriot: (21) * Mrs. Audrey Hall: (21) * Siegfried Farnon: (21) * Tristan Farnon: (20) Jenny Alderson: (16) * Richard Alderson: (14) * Maggie: (9) * Gerald Hammond: (8) * Tricki Woo: (8) [Oddly not on the list, but known to be there.] Mrs. Pumphrey: (7) * Hugh Hulton: (7) Henry Dinsdale: (6) James Herriot St. and Hannah Herriot: (5) Francois (Mrs. Pumphrey's butler): (5) * Tom Chapman: (4) Dick Rudd: (4)

[cherryyharryy]

I’ll Be Okay

WC:1k

Warnings: Smut

The interpretations of Dreams, Sigmund Freud. Big Sur and the Oranges of Hieronymus Bosch, Henry Miller. The Grapes of Wrath, John Steinbeck.

It looks like the books are moving. The bed is creaking, an awful, rusted squeaking sound that I’ll remember for years. Sweat is building up in the same places as when I wake in the middle of the night in August. But I can’t get up to stumble across the room to turn the fan on. It looks like the books are moving, but it’s just me.

When I look down I can hardly see my body; he’s covering up so much. I wonder if my sweat bothers him. I guess not, because then he might get off.

Moby Dick, Herman Melville. The Order of Time, Carlo Revelli. A Journal of the Plague Year, Daniel Defoe.

It’s like the books are shaking now. And he’s grunting now. When he stops and pulls out, I realize how dehydrated I am, because it takes too long for relief to register in my brain. And then once it does, it’s too late. I’m flipped over like a doll.

It’s almost two AM. I watch the second hand for an entire revolution. What time was it when I got here? How did I get here?

He said, “I’ve been watching you all night.”

I said, “I just got here.”

I remember the drink he gave me. I poured it out. I pretended to take a sip and then poured it out. And you might think I was being too nice to a guy who thought complimenting my eyes was enough, but it was done out of habit. He couldn’t even see my eyes.

The Persecution and Assassination of Jean-Paul Marat as Performed by the Inmates of the Asylum of Charenton Under the Direction of the Marquis de Sade, Peter Weiss. The Hound of the Baskervilles, Arthur Conan Doyle. The Holy Bible.

He’s good at what he does. He’s patient. He starts with sweet names. Then it’s a hand on your knee. And you think, it’s just my knee, I’m okay. Then a hand on your back, rubbing your neck, thumb on your cheek. I’m okay, I’m okay, I’m okay.

He brought up his apartment like it was a new idea. Like people didn’t visit other people and he’s the first one to think of it. He tugged me off my stool, and I forgot how to say no.

The wallpaper is torn by the door. It’s some God awful print from the 70’s. I smell alcohol. His mouth is by my ear. No, I don’t like that you bastard. I’m okay. I’ll be okay.

And the Hippos Were Boiled in Their Tanks, Jack Kerouac and William S. Burroughs. History of the Rain, Niall Williams. Eleven Poems, Seamus Heaney

The lights are off and there’s a lava lamp on his desk. All my clothes are on the floor. His are still on. My arms are weak, and I fall onto his bed. My face is pushed into the sheets. Not even the pillow. I don’t even get a pillow.

More sweat, accumulating on my skin, like swarms of mosquitoes landing and sticking to me. More and more. I can’t breathe. It hurts. I hate him. I want to die.

He studies English. He wants to travel. He went to Japan three years ago and he’s never been the same. He’s thinking about going vegan. It’s amazing how many facts a man will tell you about themselves when they can’t take their eyes off your breasts. And apparently, I feel so fuckin’ good. I wouldn’t know

I like to read too. Why did I tell him that? Why did I offer anything up? Checkmate. He had me. I opened the door for him. He plowed through before I could step out of the way. You should come over and see my collection. I think you’ll like it.

The Hobbit, J.R.R Tolkien. War and Peace, Leo Tolstoy. Lolita, Vladimir Nabokov.

A very boring city sits outside the window; I have a view now. I’ve been placed ever so delicately on the edge of his bed. The squeaking is worse now. And the headboard bangs against the wall. It’s an old, chipped gold railing type. I’ve hit my head three times so far. I said shit each time and he said nothing.

It’s so dark out I can pretend I’m anywhere. Just a skyline of buildings. New York, London, Paris. I’ll be okay. Paris. I’m in Paris. If I squint, the water tower can be the Eiffel Tower. The power plant...the Leaning Tower of Pisa. I’m in Italy now. Maybe—

“I’m so close.”

Nevermind.

The sounds he makes when he’s finally finishing, are, without exaggeration, revolting. And then as he’s zipping his jeans he’s humming. Rocket Man. I’ll have to remember to delete it off my playlist. I’m surprised—dumbfounded—when he tosses the condom in the trash. I hate that I can’t remember him ever putting it on.

The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time, Mark Haddon. A Christmas Carol, Charles Dickens. Amusing Ourselves to Death: Public Discourse in the Age of Show Business, Neil Postman and Andrew Postman.

I pick up my clothes piece by piece. They burn when I slide them on.

Television: Seeing by Wire or Wireless, Alfred Dinsdale. Watership Down, Richard Adams. The Midnight Watch: A Novel of the Titanic and the Californian, David Dyer.

“You weren’t lying,” I say, scanning the bookshelf now that they’ve stopped moving.

“‘Course not.”

The Stories of Anton Chekhov, Anton Chekhov. The Sun Also Rises, Ernest Hemingway. A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man, James Joyce.

He moves past me, the bathroom door shutting a moment after. I step back to see the top shelves.

The Odyssey, Homer. The Brothers Karamazov, Fyodor Dostoyevsky. The Divine Comedy, Dante Alighieri.

I said yes. To everything. I can’t really blame him for hating myself. I reach up and slip Heart of Darkness, Joseph Conrad, off and fan the pages under my nose. The bathroom door starts opening, and I shove the book into the waistband of my pants.

“You wanna stay? Smoke a little?”

“No, I’m just gonna go.”

The Sound and the Fury, by William Faulkner. To Kill a Mockingbird, Harper Lee. The Trial, Frank Kafka.

He says something else, but I’m already passing by his couch. “Thanks for the book,” I whisper. “I’ll add it to my own collection.” You should come see it sometime.

[mo-torious-mo-blog]

You Fucked With The Wrong Nigger

DSM-IV TR: A Suggestion After having read the book three times now, I have a suggestion for the DSM-V. Utilize COLOR CODED GRAPHICS to delineate the LOGIC underlying diagnoses rules, and make them INTERACTIVE: A Decision Tree The DSM-IV TR is otherwise poorly written and organized, and my current “prescribing physician” cannot find her way to outside of a circular argument. — Re: Order to Show Cause Medication Over Objection Mental Hygiene Unit No: 300902-B Hon Justice Carl J. Landilino Pursuant to 22 NYCRR 1380-1.1., the undersigned, KENNETH G. ELLISEN, an attorney admitted to practice in the courts of New York State, certifies that, upon information and belief and reasonable inquiry, the contentinos contained in the annexed document are not frivolous. McALOON & FRIEDMAN, P.C. Attorneys for PETITIONER 123 William Street New York, NY 10038-3804 212.732.8700 212.227.2903 —- Filename: ‪http://www.nyc.gov/html/mail/html/mailhhc.html‬ Alan D. Aviles President, HHC Message Type: Complaint Topic: Information About hospitals Contact Info: Yes M/M: Mr. First Name: Wole Middle Name: M Last Name: Fayemi Company: Accelerated Sciences LLC Street Address: 280 E21st Street Address Number: 1B City: Brooklyn State: NY Postal Code: 11226 Country: United States Work Phone #: 347.404.7037 Email Address: wfayemi@live.com Message: To Whom It May Concern,This is to reiterate my previous message that I am filing a civil lawsuit against Kings County Hospital, specifically naming Dr. Jenardinan, Dr. Kinyamo and Dr. Mustafa.Details can be found on my facebook page.Regards,Dino, LLC: Accelerated Sciences, LLC40 Fifth Avenue, NY, NY 1001115 Francine Court, White Plains,NY 10607c/oWole M. Fayemi cc: ‪http://cqc.ny.gov/contact/submit-complaint‬ —- Filename: GROSS NEGLIGENCE (* cross reference Filename: HEAP OF CRAP; NYC HRA Home Energy Assistance Program *) Invega® 6mg tablsets: $1,900.00 for 100 tablets i. proscribes operating a motor vehicle or heavy machinery *) ii. interferes with cognitive processes iii. tachycardia Dr. Kinyamo, During the initial medication override meeting, you asked me to give you a ‘complete’ list of persons you could call to verify my claims about the existence of my company, in order to refute your nonsensical claims about my “grandiosity”, which only reflect your complete lack of knowledge, education and insight into the world of buisness, financial services (including the insurance industry, both from the standpoint of government funded as well as private insurers), intellectual property, contracts, research & development funding, advanced database and record keeping initiaties, corporate governance, public offerings and private placements, strategic consulting, distribution strategies (of both products and se4vices, including pharmaceuticals), as well as an alarming lack of facility with concepts surrounding molecular biology and biochemistry, pharmacokinetics and pharmacodynamics, the difference between hard and soft endpoints, and your propensity, like your predecessor, to lie, or PERJURE yourself while under oath. That notwithstanding, in the interests of not wasting my time, which, based upon my NET WORTH exceeds yours by several orders of the magnitude (* translation: DO NOT WASTE MY FUCKING TIME *), I am providing you with the information you request, in order to facilitate your dude diligence calls, as the burden of proof is yon you to substantiate your claims of “grandiosity”, as the judge in our previous hearing for my discharge made it clear, and a matter of record, it behooves you to substantiate my claims. For your information, my outside counsel will subpoena records of my current and previous hospitalizations in this institution, as well as copies of the transcripts from all court proceedings (“sealed” or not) which will become part of a civil suit against this institution which is being prepared, as I documented to the admistrator of this hospital IN WRITING moths before my most recent admission. This is SEPARATE from the deposition I was asked to sign by Sara Rotkin and her colleague upon my first admission here years ago (some class action lawsuit against ALL NYC HHC psychiatric insitutions). In any case, (some of) the names you requested are as follows: Stefan Krause David Ebersman Richard Bruck Gregory A. Busch Eugene Freedman Stewart Reed Mark Stehrenberger Roland Graefr Lillian Chou John Goodwin Douglas A. Doi Bradley Otoupalik Simon Atik Henrik Fisker Steven Atneosen Jeremy Glantz Eric M. Lerner Shahan IOslam Kevin DeVito Norman Heyman Jean Robert LeShufy Martin Marion Richard Allen Schwartz Martin Marion Steven J. Swain Janet Yehle Gloria Marquez Peggy Fahnestock Charles Sockett Jeffrey King Richard Shanley Janet Moran Jihad Antakli Daniel Panoz Dele Atanda Michael C. Carmichael Clive Hawkins Charles Taylor Leland F. Wilson David Nance Lapo Agnelli Coleman Lindsey Bell, III Robert Fertitta Thomas Dinsdale Carlton Rounds If you have any trouble contacting any of these people (many noted public figures), I will be happy to show you how to look up a phone number, and help you dial the phone if you so choose. A friendly reminder that the hospital has failed to respond to my complaints in writing: IT IS AGAINST MY (first amendment right) RELIGIOUS BELIEF to take psychiatric medication, particularly when I don’t suffer from any disorder. Kindest Regards, Dino, llc cc: Dr. Mustafa, Treatment Team, Kings County Hospital, apa@psych.org, reintegration@reintegration.com Fiat Heir Wakes From Coma After Overdose (Offered Lapo Elkan 5% Equity Stake to Join Management with letter of Recommendation from Henry Kissinger)