#Shared values in relationships

[prefer-unique]

Why I Don't Recommend Online Dating: A Personal Perspective

Online dating has become a cultural phenomenon, with millions of people swiping, matching, and chatting in hopes of finding love. As someone who spent years navigating the world of online dating, I can tell you firsthand that it’s not all roses and rainbows. While some people do find success, my personal experience—and the experiences of many others—paints a less glamorous picture. If you’re…

[m4jesty-love]

Why I Don't Recommend Online Dating: A Personal Perspective

Online dating has become a cultural phenomenon, with millions of people swiping, matching, and chatting in hopes of finding love. As someone who spent years navigating the world of online dating, I can tell you firsthand that it’s not all roses and rainbows. While some people do find success, my personal experience—and the experiences of many others—paints a less glamorous picture. If you’re…

[t-u-i-t-c]

"You'll triumph someday, as long as you never yield. I'll take you on any time." "You never fail to piss me off, Geats."

[skywalkr-nberrie]

One of the biggest arguments I’ve seen used by the Ob*d*l*s against Anidala, is that scene in the ROTS novel where Padmé says she could trust OW with the secret of the rebellion and was hesitant to tell Anakin and I just wanna say:

Padmé wasn't an idiot. She was an extremely intelligent and competent woman, perfectly able to understand that loving Anakin and thinking that he could be trusted with a certain politic-related matter were two very different things and reducing her choice regarding who to trust with an important political matter only on the basis of her feelings of romantic love diminishes her professionalism, and this is why I say y'all could never understand her.

Padmé didn’t have to "love" OW or even like him at all to know he was the perfect Jedi to ask for help in a secret political matter.

That's the point being made in the novel, she’s hit with the realization that Anakin in this particular moment could not be told this piece of info because of his relationship with Palpatine, and Padmé specifically mentions in the Junior ROTS novel that she didn't want to make Anakin “keep a secret” if he didn’t agree with their stance because it’d be “unfair.” So this also played a part in why Padmé didn’t think it best to inform Anakin about the Rebellion. It honestly had little to do with her actually lacking trust in him, and more to do with the circumstances she was in not allowing her to be open with her husband and her not wanting to make him choose between his wife and his “father figure.”

However, Padmé knows OW’s political ideas aren't tied to ONE particular person but to a philosophy, one which is closer to her own, at that point. None of this was ever meant to be hinted as “romantic” or even remotely insinuated as romantic. It’s strictly professional and even the tone of the scene makes that so abundantly clear.

All I’m saying is that, some of these proshippers are doing the most out here to try and prove their ship, like my loves? You forgot a very important thing called �� context ✨ and regardless of her rational thinking, Padmé still went out of her way to try and talk out all of this Rebellion secrecy stuff with Anakin when she confronted him in the scene where she asks if he ever thought they were “fighting on the wrong side.” Padmé didn’t trust OW in the same way she trusted Anakin (with her entire self and being) she had the level of trust and love for Anakin that was only meant for him.

Mixing up her unwavering faith in Anakin as her husband with her trust in OW’s devotion to duty as her comrade/ally is purposely deluding yourself, because the two aren’t the same and therefore can’t be compared. An example of this is: Padmé constantly putting more value to Anakin’s words over OW’s in the end of ROTS when he came to tell her of Anakin’s “crimes”. She completely disregarded what OW had claimed about her husband and instead made her way to where Anakin was herself, to ask him directly. Despite what the truth was, this is proof of her trusting Anakin unconditionally, and I didn’t even think I had to spell that out because it’s as clear as day.

In conclusion, Padmé didn’t trust OW more than Anakin, she just knew the circumstances she was in didn’t exactly make it easy for her to openly talk with her husband about these matters and that’s part of what played into the issues they had in ROTS, it’s exactly what Sidious wanted. This scene in the novel doesn’t exist to imply some hidden romantic undertone that George was intending all along. No, far from that. George was always an “open, , clear and easy to understand” type of storyteller, so if the former was the case, this scene wouldn’t be any different if there was some hidden message or subtext the reader should be made aware of, George would make it obvious. Fact of the matter is, the one and only reason for this scene in the novel to exist is only to show to us as the “reader” that the narrative is tearing apart the Star-Crossed-lovers (Anakin and Padmé.) and visibly putting the two of them on different sides in the story because the consequences of this narrative choice is what will foreshadow and play into the inevitable and great fall of the couple and character in the future. Even the novel makes a very purposeful and clear distinction between “love and trust” in this chapter where all this occurs. Padmé’s dilemma in ROTS was overtly “Love vs Duty” and both GL and Natalie Portman have said so in ROTS features and a perfect example of this is the fact that Padmé loves Anakin, but knew she had to trust OW with the situation at hand. And if you want to talk “narratively” Padmé needed a reason to keep the Rebellion a secret from Anakin, thus leading to Palpatine to sense “betrayal” in Padmé later on, and using that to his advantage to manipulate Anakin even more into getting him to “suspect” her. It’s all spelt out for us and it’s not hard to miss. All it takes is a little media literacy and understanding context.

(Mind you, hypothetically, if this scene existed for literally any other reason, it would’ve been brought up again, but it wasn’t. It’s only mentioned once and exists for only one moment which was meant to serve a certain narrative and then it was done. There’s not much to make of it since the context of the scene is so clear.)

[altschmerzes]

i need to stop shadowboxing the concept of romance when i write. i need to make my brain go to a world where romance doesn’t exist when i write because feeling its constant presence and people’s expectations of its presence and reading in of its presence is making me a worse writer.

like. thinking a lot about that post that’s going around rn about Books That Are Clearly Afraid Of The Reader. been thinking about how fear of being interpreted or perceived or whatever permeates a Lot of what i do and always has, creatively, and frankly compromises it, especially in terms of fear of people reading romance into my stuff because of how much i write about interpersonal relationships and intimacy and reliance and vulnerability and intense emotional situations.

i need to stop trying to build a boat with my main priority being ‘i dont want people to insist to me that this is a car or make people feel tricked into seeing a car etc etc’ when there is actually no part of this boat that needs to be made with cars in mind at all i could just Build The Damn Boat. this metaphor got lost.

point is i need to stop letting romance take up space in my stories at all. even if it's just as something i'm doing backflips over and around. i need to just start writing about platonic relationships - friendships, queerplatonic relationships, familial relationships, etc - without feeling like i need to first disprove romance as an automated and inherent assumption. romance should have no quarter here, even in feeling forced to deny it.

[fromtheseventhhell]

Another reason that Stansas hate the idea of Arya and Dany being friends (outside of them wanting to demonize Dany) is that they've convinced themselves that Dany and Sansa are the only main female characters, so if a Stark sister is going to have a significant relationship with Dany it has to be Sansa. Arya being constantly downplayed and treated like an accessory to Sansa has generally led to the consensus that her relationship with Dany will be defined by whatever Sansa's relationship (positive or negative) with her is. That's why Arya is always being left out of the "we were robbed of [x] female character friendship" conversations and why theories about Dany/Arya getting along are treated as Sansa hate; Arya, as a character, is seen as secondary to Sansa by a lot of people

[bumblingbabooshka]

[Tuvok & Janeway: Control, Distance, Duty & Connection.] Sources: St Voyager Transcripts / Mitski 'First Love Late Spring' / Disco Elysium

[aidenwaites]

"Why did she marry ricken" ricken comes off as someone who is air-headed and sort of pretentious, but in a way that is so bumbling and ultimately well-meaning that he's seemingly harmless. People laugh at him when he walks out of the room but he's still good-natured over it, doesn't hold a grudge about it. He's also still honest that it hurts him. Devon clearly finds something about him charming, and while she's also rolling her eyes at some of his idiosyncrasies, she's tolerant of them, and it is like.. an effort. It might be silly that he believes a child needs all three of their beds in their bedroom as they grow up or they'll be deeply traumatized, but he went through the effort of putting together their child's bedroom, and overall wants the best.

It doesn't detract from the fact that he is still thoughtless and short-sighted, and selfish. That he didn't learn from or realize or acknowledge how his little charity scheme was condescending. That he's getting so easily drawn into Lumon- a place he knows is actively harming Mark and possibly Gemma- and is willing to suddenly backtrack from his principles to sell out. That's the core of their little argument, I think-- Devon mightve found some of his writing silly, but she supported him all the way until he decided to let someone else take control of it. Maybe even compounded by the fact that a lot of the You You Are seems to involve mentions of Devon and Mark and Gemma, and the bond between them, and the legacy Gemma left behind. Butchering his book is butchering what he wrote about them, too.

[commsroom]

thinking again about how underexplored hera & minkowski are as a dynamic, considering how close their relationship is, and i think there is some synergy between minkowski's "i can't think of a decision in my life that wasn't already determined by someone else. but, even then, there was always a choice, and i always made it." and similar sentiments expressed by hera. and this exchange with eiffel in ep 48: "no. this isn't even a choice for me." / "yes, it is. it's a sucky ass choice, but it is a choice." while hera & minkowski were the two people who initially argued to stay...

it's true that all of the main wolf 359 characters have an element of regaining control / autonomy present in their arcs (lovelace's conflict with the dear listeners + choosing to be isabel lovelace, and eiffel's need to take responsibility for himself as a full person and an autonomous actor in order to move forwards), but i think there's something about how hera & minkowski share this fear of losing control. that they must perform perfectly, be better and do more than everyone around them in order to earn the same amount of respect as anyone else, without knowing why they feel so... deficient.

i think a lot of their early conflict stems from this shared insecurity clashing against opposite priorities and relationships to authority - minkowski believes that the way to prove herself as a person is to attach her worth to her job and excel at it, while hera's worth as a person has been tied to her job by external forces and she struggles to be seen as more than that. it's an important job to minkowski, and an important role, but she doesn't initially realize that she's not just arguing with hera as an unruly subordinate, but as a person for whom that is the unwilling totality of her existence. like in let's kill hilbert, where hera says "try to sound a little less patronizing" and she replies "i'm not being patronizing, i'm being critical" - i think that's the primary disconnect in their perspectives.

over time, as minkowski learns to separate herself (and her self worth) more and more from that idealized role of commander, i think those shared insecurities become a point of connection more than discordance. minkowski is sort of a defender by nature, and devoted to the people she cares about, but i think there is still a personal element in some of the ways she most ardently advocates for hera - in the way she demands hera be respected for her efforts, and, notably... minkowski has a lot of personal baggage around being made fun of for how she speaks. i think it's worth considering that in the context of lovelace mocking hera's stutter, and minkowski later turning "count to ten" back on her.

[prefer-unique]

Modern Dating Struggles: How to Find Genuine Connection in a Digital World

Dating in the modern world can feel like navigating a maze. With endless swiping, ghosting, and the pressure to present a perfect online persona, it’s no wonder so many people feel overwhelmed and disconnected. While technology has made it easier to meet new people, it’s also created new challenges when it comes to building authentic relationships. In this post, we’ll explore the struggles of…

[m4jesty-love]

Modern Dating Struggles: How to Find Genuine Connection in a Digital World

Dating in the modern world can feel like navigating a maze. With endless swiping, ghosting, and the pressure to present a perfect online persona, it’s no wonder so many people feel overwhelmed and disconnected. While technology has made it easier to meet new people, it’s also created new challenges when it comes to building authentic relationships. In this post, we’ll explore the struggles of…

[gxtzeizm]

Lando Norris and Max Fewtrell for Quadrant Originals behind the scenes [x]

[pangyham]

GAH LONG POST..

xingqiu and chongyun have insanely good potential for angst my god. xingqiu in particular is so fun to think about in the context of chongyun. what do YOU know about chivalry boy

thinking about how he and hu tao kinda operate on similar notions of justice and all that shmick except hu tao is more strictly averse to disrupting the Natural Order (incredibly vague and generalized concept rn sorry) whilst xingqiu sets his principles more arbitrarily. chongyun's presence somehow foils a lot of his notable character traits. gestures hands vaguely in the air but sth sth hu tao would not approve of xq's moral infractions

perhaps im just reading too deep into this but shrugs ill admit something's changed in Me the last 2 years and coming back to xq and cy has me like. scratches head now hold on im not entirely sure if i even like the way xq treats cy. its kinda one of the main points of their dynamic- the whole.. pranking this oblivious guy who i really adore etc. but its deeper implications leave me a little unsatisfied and a little troubled (?).. in the long run i personally dont really see anything substantially appealing about their (leaning towards romantic in this context) relationship other than like ?? the tropes that mhy imposed upon them. they were created as a compatible Duo ykwim. they reference each other a lot in their lore and even in-game but.. idk maybe i just view them separately instead of a joint unit that anaylzing them individually revealed a lot of crevices and cracks in their ship that's built upon their mainstream appeal

but anyway i've thought a lot about them as a duo and is it nuts to say i like them as a romantic ship but if they were unrequited. i can see them working out but it necessitates a complete subversion and reconstruction of xingqiu (chara development basically LOL) on my part that i would totally invest myself in but im not entirely sure how to execute it

i like xingqiu a LOT as a flawed character. i wouldnt go as far as to say hes toxic, just very conflicted and insecure. hes a fun character to think about. re: the hu tao bit i mentioned above, i think they would have a really fun, witty, and transformative friendship

but anyway. yes i like xq and i still like xy. theyre just a bit more complicated now aha. im still capable of enjoying fluffy ship dynamics but lately ive been in a Character Study Mood ... mmm.. ive yet to organize my chongming thoughts

[talisthighs]

I feel like Jayce’s brilliance isn’t acknowledged enough in fics or meta. He’s an engineer, he’s great at drawing, he’s a craftsman and knows how to forge, he’s Extremely adaptable to situations!! Hes a problem solver, he picks a direction to go and sprints towards it. He’s brilliant in so many different ways!! I actually think social politeness is like…his weakest area lmao. I’m not saying he isn’t good at it. I think He’s an extrovert and a ppl pleaser too but I feel like he just doesn’t connect v much with ppl more like he’s more capable of the illusion of connection by performing a bit… if that makes sense. But I feel ppl emphasize this trait the most when it’s like the least true. I feel like he would get tired of socializing after awhile if it’s with people he doesn’t truly have a genuine connection with, kind of like a masking thing.

[prefer-unique]

Signs of a Healthy Relationship: What Every Couple Should Strive For

#Love should feel safe, fulfilling, and uplifting—but how do you know if your relationship is truly healthy? In a world where social media romanticizes everything from grand gestures to toxic “passion,” it’s easy to confuse unhealthy patterns with love. A strong, healthy relationship isn’t about perfection—it’s about two people who are committed to growing together, communicating openly, and…

[m4jesty-love]

Signs of a Healthy Relationship: What Every Couple Should Strive For

#Love should feel safe, fulfilling, and uplifting—but how do you know if your relationship is truly healthy? In a world where social media romanticizes everything from grand gestures to toxic “passion,” it’s easy to confuse unhealthy patterns with love. A strong, healthy relationship isn’t about perfection—it’s about two people who are committed to growing together, communicating openly, and…