#Shrewella de Vil

[voxpeople]

Suella Braverman Plans New Policy to Deter Refugees: Bomb Eritrea

Home secretary Suella Braverman (left) intends to push a radical new policy as part of her aim of net zero migration to the UK. Insiders believe she will push for the destruction of the east African country, annihilating the entire population to prevent them from ever becoming refugees to begin with.

[gowithyou]

My husband and I have been catching shrews (alive and unharmed!) in our apartment lately, and of course they needed names. Today I drew portraits to remember them by. 

[voxpeople]

Suella Braverman Begins Hibernation for Winter

After a long, busy year spent pursuing policies to rid the last remaining rights to refugees and homeless people among others and exploring extremist rhetoric, former home secretary Suella Braverman (pictured) has entered into hibernation - a state of minimal activity to preserve energy throughout winter months - along with all the other mud-dwelling rodents that live in the UK.

[voxpeople]

In Short: Ben Ainslie Faces Deportation from UK

The competitive sailor - winner of four Olympic gold medals for Team GB - has become one of the first to fall victim to the government's new laws stating that people found crossing the channel in a small boat will be banned from ever re-entering the country after Ainslie was found sailing off the Hampshire coast.

[voxpeople]

Migrants Land in UK Unnoticed While Government Busy Calling Out Gary Lineker

While the government lay in to the Match of the Day presenter for what they saw as an unfair assessment of their policy regarding migrant crossings, they missed another boat full of migrants that reached the UK shores. The passengers were not met by anyone upon arriving and headed to the mainland undetected and without challenge.

[voxpeople]

Suella Braverman Begins Hibernation

After a long year spent pursuing and denying human rights to refugees, Home secretary Suella Braverman has begun hibernation - a state of minimal activity to preserve energy throughout winter months where they would be at risk of colder weather and food sources becoming scarce. While other creatures, like mice, bats and racoons, hibernate throughout winter, Braverman's state will last only until she is due back in Parliament on January 9th 2023.