#They're also gilfs

[hydrachea]

Do you think god lives in fear of what they've created.

[etrevil]

breast nibbler and the lady whose breast were nibbled

[eff-plays]

All those ppl who romanticize Astarion living forever without Tav are commendable for their dedication to angst.

Me, though? I like to live deliciously. So ...

DILF Astarion

Different hair are cuz he's got hairectile dysfunction in his old age 😔

[cubey-cube]

@lex-the-lesbiann PLEASE STOP REBLOGGING MY OLD ART PLEASE I'M IN TEARS PLEASE. /J/NM

Autumn and LINDAAA DOODLE AWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!

[quickhacked]

it took me Several Tries to send this ask bc i forgor their names again. BUT 3 & 41 for artyom and sascha!!!

COMFORT FOOD [x] characters >> artyom mikhaylov (oc), callinan tain (oc), sascha kovalevsky (oc) context >> date unknown; the party is visiting myvetal in the west of scayrius, initially there to help out an old friend but now working for archmage marius jahal, whose true intentions have yet to reveal themselves total >> 1.2k words warnings >> food, paranoia

‘Artyom? We’re back!’

Lorelei’s warm voice echoed through the large entrance hall of the house the party had been calling home over the last few months. A much fancier place than any of them were used to– most of their visits to other towns ended with them seeking shelter in the nearest inn they could find or setting up camp in a nearby field– but it was a welcomed break from the leaky ceilings and creaky wooden floorboards they had grown used to ever since they had started traveling together.

Sascha took off his overcoat and tossed it over the back of a dining chair, smiling as he watched Berry and Teacup dart back outside to run around in the rain. It had been going for a while now; not out of the ordinary for the time of year, and he knew from his studies the fields surrounding town could easily turn into a marsh until the heavy precipitation period was over.

They were staying in Myvetal, the largest city in the west of Scayrius. With its cobbled roads, narrow alleyways and tall houses it was surprisingly similar to Zarevsk and Neryugrad back at home– save for some cultural aspects and the significant lack of steep hills and raised districts, that was. A densely populated center with shops and taverns scattered about, small marketplaces creating cozy neighborhoods within the central district and even at the edge of town, where their house could be found, it was still busy enough to feel like you were right in the middle of it.

But despite the similarities to his home country, Sascha did not like it there.

Perhaps it was the way people stared at him, whenever he was outside. He was familiar enough with it to not let it get to him on most days, but the feeling of eyes on his back burning holes through the back of his skull haunted him like the presence of his patron, a dark shadow hanging over him and unwillingly keeping him alert for danger that was not even there.

Or perhaps it was the business they had stumbled into by accident, the second they had arrived in town. Receiving jobs from an archmage of all possibilities– Marius Jahal, one of the most important men of town if not the whole country– without clear understanding why they had to do any of what he was asking from them in the first place.

Sascha did not trust the man. He trusted Lorelei and Vatha’s judgment, of course; and if they did not question Marius then neither should he, and generally speaking the jobs they’d done so far had gone well and he had no reason to believe they were unknowingly on the wrong side of a conflict.

It was mainly the mage’s interest in Artyom that bothered him. The way he tried to get closer to him, to get a look at his research– his offers to become Artyom’s mentor, to help him with his thesis. None of it sat right with Sascha at all, and while he did not have the best intuition in the world the bad feeling gnawing at him from within was enough to make the hairs on his arms stand up straight every time he thought a little too long about it.

‘Oh, you are all soaked. Weather that bad outside?’

Artyom’s voice dragged Sascha out of his thoughts and he looked up to see his partner stand in the doorway of the kitchen, leaning against the post with a crooked smile on his face. He waved him over and when Sascha got within reach he gently brushed some of the wet strands of hair stuck to his forehead out of his face and pressed a kiss on his temple.

He had stayed home that day. On Sascha’s request; Artyom had been studying the days away in Marius’ tower for the past week and had barely gotten any rest in between, and to take him along to exterminate a whole nest of ghouls holed up in one of the city’s warehouses would have been far from the brightest idea.

‘Everything went well here while we were away?’ Sascha asked, smiling softly as he allowed Artyom to wrap his arms around his waist and kiss the corner of his mouth.

‘I should be the one asking you that,’ was the answer, followed by another kiss on his cheek. ‘But yes, yes– all is well. No visitors, no trouble. I made dinner.’

‘Hmm– it smells lovely.’

‘Come on, of course it does. I made it.’

Artyom’s confidence had to be one of the most charming things about him to Sascha. And he was right, too– Artyom’s cooking was the best of all of them without a single doubt, and possibly the best food Sascha had ever eaten in his whole life.

‘What did you make?’ he asked, taking Artyom’s hand and allowing him to drag him into the kitchen where Callinan was already peering into one of the pans on the fire. He hadn’t even needed to ask; was able to tell from smell alone it was a wolf roast with honey and glazed onions, with baby potatoes and asparagus on the side. A meal that had been his comfort food for many years now– and considering they had known each other since the age of 12, of course Artyom knew about that.

‘You said we were having stew today!’ Callinan dramatically pointed out, the disappointment in their voice obviously fake and they only barely managed to dodge Artyom’s incoming swatting hand with a suppressed smile on their face. ‘I trusted you!’

‘That was your first mistake,’ Artyom playfully replied, managing to land a hit on Callinan’s wrist and effectively stopping them from trying to taste some of the still simmering sauce. ‘No, butcher had fresh meats in so I changed plans. We will have stew tomorrow.’

‘Well alright. Holding you to it.’

‘You are welcome to do so.’

Sascha stopped paying attention halfway through the conversation, leaning back into the furniture as he watched Artyom douse the fire with a single flick of his wrist and Callinan take out plates and utensils to set the table. The quiet moments were always his favorite; no danger lurking around the corner, just him and his friends in the safety and comfort of their own space finally getting the rest they deserved.

And perhaps one day his whole life could be quiet moments such as that. He was still young, of course– but with everything happening in the world, the unexplained rifts they had continued to run into, and Cthulhu’s influence gnawing away at his entire being, the thought of settling down brought him comfort like nothing else could.

His gaze wandered to the window and his eyes locked onto the dark storm clouds hanging above their heads. He could feel something tightening deep within his stomach– as if he was hungry, starving, and despite it being around dinnertime he knew very well that the hunger wasn’t his, and no meal would be able to sate it either.

A flash of lightning startled him, and he suddenly realized he was left alone in the kitchen.

For a second he could’ve sworn he saw the silhouette of a tentacle reaching out of the sky.

[toxicanonymity]

Joel Miller Masterlist - NSFW

And other Pedro characters

Version 4/5/24 (new: free use masterlist)

Blog FAQ (updated 4/15/24)

⚠️ I do not give permission for any of my work to be copied, reposted*, translated, made into bots, put into AI, etc. *reblogging is encouraged, using the 🔁 in the bottom right corner.

A reblog of this post will not stay up-to-date. Follow @toxicfics if you want notifs and @toxicrecs for fic recs. If you can't decide where to start, Buzzfeed quizzes are at the bottom 😅

18+ joel x f!reader unless otherwise noted. Darkness ratings (D - Darkish to Dark, DD - Extra Dark, DDD - ultra dark) are subjective and don't automatically mean it has dubcon (DC) or noncon (NC). The NC I write is physically enjoyed by reader. DC is often situations that diminish the ability to truly consent. Like drugs, captivity, or power imbalance, but in many DC fics, reader is willing or even enthusiastic.

🍒 innocent reader | 💤 somnophilia | 👴/🧔‍♂️ explicit age gap

MASTERLISTS - AUs, Collections, and Series

Night walks (AU) 👴 D, DC (drugs). hot, older pothead neighbor who talks dirty.

Raider Joel DD. NC (at first, via implicit threat), DC (stockholm syndrome). This is a big AU with lots of lore and interaction.

Silence can never be bought (dbf, AU)👴⭐ You catch him in a compromising position.

Left in Lincoln (dbf x virgin) 👴🍒 DD Your dads trust him to look in on you while they're gone.

Stepdad 🧔‍♂️D You catch him perving on your insta and start toying with him. You seduce him.

Slasher Joel DD DC - You're DTF but end up fcking for your life when you offend him.

Vampire Joel DC - he's been waiting for you for centuries and can't let you go once he finds you.

The Raid DC - Javi and Steve find you on a drug raid and take you under their wing, so to speak.

Speakeasy (Collection, no plot) - Exhibitionist one shots and drabbles.

Thighs out (bf's dad) - Your bf strays and his hot, slutty dad makes you feel better, much better.

Brotherly Sharing - Several pairs of miller bros. including uncle tommy & leopard print.

✨Free Use - D, DC, 💤 👫

for survival (2003)

For Survival (1.4k) - Joel, a stranger, saves your life, you fuck during evacuation.

For Survival 2 (1.4k) - fucking in your sleeping bag trying to be silent.

dark mode!Joel ULTRA dark - DDD, 👫

Dark mode (knife)You activate Joel's dark mode for your own enjoyment.

Clicking (horny! joel -> dark mode) He won't stop when a clicker appears. You try to punish him.

just the tip D, DC (power imbalance) 🧔‍♂️🍒

Just the tip 🍒 he coaxes you into full piv.

surveillance (imagine) he watches you.

Just the tip (really) you've been trying not to fuck him and this time it's really just the tip.

VIRGINS

Aches, thoughts, and needs 👴🍒 outbreak

Night Talks 🧔‍♂️🍒 D, DC best friend's dad

Patrol - pt. 1; virgin patrol 👴🍒 DD, DC

Virgin sex worker (v loss) D 🍒

Ready for her ( part of Miller Bros)

See also, Lincoln series and Just the Tip above.

⬇️ ONE SHOTS, miniseries, misc⬇️

Post-outbreak

you almost die then get used D, NC, 👫

Possessive cum play D, 👫

Secret breeder!Joel Refuses to pull out D, 👫

Jealous of you/Tess (degradation) D, DC mean

Bone broth (consensual noncon) 👫

non-con while you sleep D, NC 💤

movie night (in public) 👫 Under a blanket

Caught DDD very mean Joel, ✨At the table

Lazaretto (NC. sex pollen)👴, PART 2, DC

caught masturbating (300) D

the old fashioned way (1k) D He breeds you

Pre/Non-oubreak/AUs

pawn shop (GILF Joel) ��D

canopy, pt 2 (caught) ��🧔‍♂️ dbf in your old bed

Fucking Joel at your dad's house dbf

Breeding couple ; Pregnant , 👫

in the ass like a good girl anal drabble

Window (peeping tom) pt.2 date next door D

caught Drinking ( DDDNE) 🧔‍♂️DDD, NC sarah's friend is punished

sleeping Beauty 👴💤, 👫 CNC.

that's the spot (masseur!Joel)

gas station skeeze (300) 👴

packing: butcher!Joel DD, DC

personal trainer , part 2 D, DC

daddy Joel ��🧔‍♂️, a day in the filth

miniseries: jalbird - cellmate's nephew

dark nurse!Joel (sex pollen imagines)

✨locket - DC best friends dad x dark! reader

HCs, imagines, other

Free Use / Objectification HCs - you can put Joel in different modes for your enjoyment.

Your Dirty Little Mouth - talking dirty in Spanish in public to get Joel all riled up. Reader is not a native Spanish speaker.

Therapist (Dr. Rock), pt 2 D - meta (x writer)

Brothel Reality Show

Multi-Joel Art & Misc

Lmk if yours is missing, ✨section in progress✨

Joelkémon cards by @gasolinerainbowpuddles

JOELS AS CATS by @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog

Joel's as cats pt. 2 not-a-unique-snowflake-blog

Dick HCs - size, appearance, and more

random hot things from HBO canon

Joelkémon astrology by @wannab-urs

Mood board of joels by @milla-frenchy

joels as texts by @iamasaddie

Buzzfeed Quizzes

by @missannfairy & @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog

Which Joel are you most compatible with?

Which Joel are you?

Which Joel to spend the holidays with?

Compatability: Valentine's Edition

Other pedro characters

Javi G. - Watch you watch him fuck his wife. Nick watches. You're Javi's wife.

Ezra - Sleep time: pt. one (250), two 💤(850) D You bait Ezra pt.3 Ezra strikes back. DC

Javi P.

hunt and peck (2.7k) 6/30

THE RAID ongoing series

[lizzaneia-elizalde]

Yandere! Sugar daddy x "pure"! Reader

EEEEEEEEE Time to write my baby, the fruit of my dark rofan loins (jk) Basically, this yandere is my first yandere OC and when I gave life (lol) to him in Char/ai yesterday, I just knew he had to be next.

Also, I contemplated what title to give him since he's also a mafia boss, but I decided to go with Sugar daddy since it's the most integral part of his story.

Also, "pure" just means that you dress light, really. But in Rowan's eyes, you were like an angel, a pure being that he needs to taint (oops spoiler)

Yandere! Sugar daddy name: Rowan Silas (Yes, he even has a last name)

notes: Rowan is not old, OLD. He's not a Dilf/Gilf level sugar daddy. In his lore with my other OC (his love interest), he's older by five years. Also, reader has a womb, due to mentions of pregnancy (why did I do this pregnancy shit twice? Dunno really.)

TW: noncon pregnancy, trackers, nsfw stuff

ALSO, REQUESTS ARE OPEN <3 (I don't even know if people will request but LOL just in case.)

The man only knew pain and crime all his life.

He never experienced anything good, apart from gunning down his enemies alive if that even means the same as what people deem as "good".

His life of crime was because of his adoptive father, who picked him up from the slums to become one of his personnel.

He was only seven by then. But his hands stained with blood as he killed the other kid who drowned his precious pet kitten in the lake. That's where his father knew that Rowan is not normal.

I mean, who would sport a smile while choking his fellow kid alive?

All Rowan said was "He deserved it though."

"He took what's precious from me."

That was enough to make his father set him straight to become the heir of the mafia family.

He grew up battered and bruised yet the vices he only knew is his smoking from his precious churchwarden pipe, and violence.

He told his father that it was enough for him.

Yet his body raged on, wanting more and more as greed consumed him for more.

Yes, he's a greedy man who wants more.

After all, he had nothing, then had one precious thing, then lost that thing. And then, when he eliminated the person who stole his precious thing, he got everything.

Did that make sense? To Rowan, it didn't.

He already got everything, but why does he want more?

So with a clean shot to the head, he killed his father and immediately inherited the family.

Now, he can spend the money and the resources as much as he wants. So he did. He went to casinos, brothels, luxury hotels and cruises. Everything he thinks that he needs.

But he still wants more. He still needs more.

And by god, he did get more.

He bumped into you one day, with you in your soft outfit of creams and pastels. Your pure, clean eyes made his heart skip a beat as you said sorry to him.

His greed triggered.

He wanted you so bad.

When he learned you needed a job when he saw your folder filled with resumes, he felt like he won the lottery.

"How about becoming my sugar baby? Don't worry, I won't ask anything. Much."

And as your cute figure pondered what to do, he smirked. You, in the middle of his dim office, in light clothing and an innocent face, was such a contrast in the dark office filled with his smoke from his beloved churchwarden pipe. You stuck out like a sore thumb, and he liked it.

He loved it.

And as your lips dropped the answer he wanted to hear, he shivered and gave you a lopsided smile.

"Good. Now, what do you want, love?"

Rowan sat down on his office chair, he cracked his neck and sighed.

He was bone tired. He just finished a cartel mission that he himself as the boss had to interfere. It was annoying because it was due to his incompetent new recruits.

At least they're sleeping with the "fishies", as what you call the finned sea creatures.

He grabbed something from his pocket and brought it up to his face. It was an intricate jeweled choker with a lot of rose gold arcs, jewels that match your eyes, and a diamond encrusted opal centerpiece.

He imagined you wearing it. Wrapping the choker on your neck himself, seeing your eyes flash in wonder and amazement. He imagined you also getting shy and saying that it was too expensive, and him saying that it was okay, and he wanted to give you this entirely by his own volition. And he got excited.

...In one way or another.

He chuckled and shook his head, swinging on his swivel chair as he dialed your number.

After two rings, you picked up.

"Love, come here. I got a gift for you."

You whined, getting shy again. He chuckled.

"You know what I say, I don't want to hear you say no. So come here now."

So you did.

Once you got there, he smiled and kissed your lips softly, bringing you close to him by your waist and lifting you up easily with his tatted arms.

"Come, I'll give you the present myself."

You got curious naturally.

He settled you in front of the floor length mirror which also saw... Much more intimate and sensual things you both did other than this gift giving thing he's doing.

Rowan slowly grabbed your hair and raised it, making you shiver with goosebumps from the action. He smirked, seeing you so flustered from the simple act of him grabbing your hair.

Well, that, and he also liked to grab your hair a lot while fucking you senselessly. There's that too.

You closed your eyes when he told you too, and you felt the familiar cold sensation of jewelry resting on your neck. But this time, it hugged it, making you open your eyes. It was the beautiful choker he was admiring earlier.

"Do you love it?" Rowan asked, looking at you through the mirror as he rested his chin on your shoulder. You nodded enthusiastically and said yes. He smirked.

This was the first time you didn't say to take the gift back with such a flustered apprehensive look. You're starting to get greedy.

He loved that. A lot.

"Now, how about you kiss me in return, hmm?" You rolled your eyes and gently kissed him. You know this day is not just going to end in a kiss.

But you didn't mind.

And he knows that.

You went home that day with Rowan driving you. He gave you more gifts that you shyly accepted once more, making Rowan shiver in glee. Again, you didn't reject them at all.

You're slowly getting tainted by his greediness.

And hopefully, you will be greedy enough to bring up your relationship to him, and tell him that you wanted more to this.

That you wanted his love.

Oh, he trembles at the thought.

It's not a question of if, but when, after all.

But now, he's just slowly moving forward with your relationship. Slow and steady wins the race, after all. Despite him living such a fast paced life, he knows he's patient enough to wait for you.

But if you backtracked and got out of his tight grasp...

Let's just say that the tracker he planted on your laptop, your phone, and now your precious choker will help him find you if you ran away.

You were the light to his dark, dreary life.

He'll be crazy enough to let you go.

And he's already crazy about you.

That's why he's making you addicted to him also. Showering you with gifts and love. Praising your body, worshipping it, pleasing it until you reach the heavens like the angel you are.

And if you still didn't want him... Let's just say the condoms with holes in them that he himself poked will do the trick.

It was a dirty tactic. But who cares? He's a mafia boss for god's sake. Dirty tactics aren't new to him.

And if you still somehow didn't end up pregnant and got to run away, he'll use his influence to find you.

You got no escape.

Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide.

You were his love. His greed.

With a drag of his churchwarden pipe, he drove off to plan your wedding.

You were going to be his after all.

No matter what.

I don't know if I did my baby Rowan justice i'm going crazY FUCK.

Can you guys tell I have favoritism? Because I do LOL

[gojo-mochi]

Open Collab For December/January (Since I posted this late haha!)

What's Dilfcember?

Dilf or (Dad I Like to Fuck) is a month for Dilfs of course! All and any kind of Dilfs are invited. Even if they're not technically a dilf, if they have daddy energy they're invited.

Rules and Outline:

❥Daddy Long Dick is landing down in December/January and I want you to help me greet them~

❥Any length of writing is fine~

❥Have to be a Dilf! (Even if it not canon) Gilf are also encouraged...

❥NSFW/SFW/DARK CONTENT is all Allowed! Just make sure to tag accordingly~

❥Open to any Dilfs from JJK or OP~

❥Open Limit for any characters~ Go wild!

❥Does not have to be Mutuals with me to Join!

❥Joining Ends Dec 31st

❥Submission deadline will be end of January/Start of Feb~ (to give people some time)

How to Join:

Comment or Message me with the Dilf you want to bag and a small outline/plot of the story. Include if it going to be NSFW/SFW/DARK CONTENT.

❥Snippet of a submission:

Hello! I would like to write for Toxic!Dilf!Shanks, it would dark content theme, and it would be about Shanks secretly fucking his son's best friend

The Current Line up!!!!!

Softy~ (@gojo-mochi)

ᥫ᭡. Single Dads AU W/Neighbor Reader: Starring~

ᥫ᭡. Choso with little bro Yuji and getting lost in the snowstorm (SFW)

ᥫ᭡. Geto with Mimiko and Nanako taking them to see christmas lights (SFW)

ᥫ᭡. Gojo with Megumi and Tsumiki (SFW) TBA LATER (IMSORRY)

ᥫ᭡."Working hard or hardly working?" You keep running into the hot apartmnet Dilf right after he's done working out... Gym!Dilf Zoro (NSFW)

ᥫ᭡."You're the father?!" You were supposed to babysit Yuuji today but instead you found a stranger in Choso's house...Dilf!Kenjaku (Dark Con) (NSFW)

ᥫ᭡. "Tell me your secrets, & I'll give you my heart" Toji scambling to find the perfect Christmas gift for you but things keeps going awry Dilf!Toji (SFW)

Cille~ (@bby-deerling)

ᥫ᭡. "Meeting your best friend's deadbeat dad for the first time~ Dilf!Buggy (NSFW)

ᥫ᭡. Read here!

Pris~ (@sleepymarimo)

ᥫ᭡. "white christmas" Little megumi has been asking for a baby brother or sister, while you’ve been wanting a white christmas. toji thinks he can do both this year! Dilf!Toji (NSFW)

ᥫ᭡. "under the mistletoe" Little brother yuji has been wanting you to get with choso for a while, so he takes matters into his own hands. (SFW) BigBro!Choso

Honey~ (@honeysworld-offanfiction)

ᥫ᭡. You find out your bf cheats on you. Crying is how your father’s friends, Rayleigh & Edward, find you. Since your dad is away unable to console you, his friends help you instead. Dilf!Rayleigh & Dilf!Edward (Dark Con) (NSFW) (Incest Play)

Stephis~ (@stephisokay)

ᥫ᭡. You’ve never visited your friends home before, he’s always so hesitant. But when he does for a friendly game, you find his dad. DILF!Sukuna (Dark Con) (NSFW)

Poison~ (@anystalker707)

ᥫ᭡. Reader is down but Crocidle is here to try cheer you up~ Dilf!Crocodile (SFW)

ᥫ᭡. Read here!

Instagram Banner by@cafekitsune

[angry-brony]

VAMPIRE HUNTER D-ILF

i mean technically they're also gilfs but point is they're hot and old shhhh

[piosplayhouse]

Outline for modern genderbend svsss au where they're all trans milfs (except for Binghe who is trans still but not a milf) cinematic universe:

[Act 1] Shen Yuan was on his path to a teaching degree at age 22~23 and began shadowing high school tenured teacher Shen Jiu (no relation, they just have the same last name and hate it) where he changes a young Binghe's life by protecting him from bullying and just generally being a better teacher than sj. Right before Binghe's last year of school, sy's health takes a sudden decline, he's hospitalized, and he has to postpone his degree. Through a miscommunication, Binghe believes that sy was fired for having too much contact w Binghe and is now somewhere else- devastated, he enrolls at the prestigious, yet secretly abusive, uni that sy had pushed him to apply to, with the goal of becoming successful enough to pull strings and give sy whatever he wants

[Act 2] While hospitalized, Shen Yuan staves off boredom by being terminally online. Through this, he meets and quickly becomes unlikely friends with 40 something year old mid tier author Shang Qinghua. Sqh offers sy an admittedly unglamorous job as her editor since he's pretty much given up on his degree at this point, as well as a place to stay away from his family when he gets out of the hospital. Sy accepts and after moving in, gets to know sqh, who is a trans woman who transitioned in her 30s when her first big book deal put her in a stable enough position to do so. Sy realizes she is also trans; the two gradually make sqh's newest work a bestseller and she's suddenly inundated with publishing and movie deals. Happy times. Meanwhile, Binghe becomes a demon (frat boy)

[Act 3] Sy hits 30, now comfortable in her cushy job as sqh's editor/agent. Unfortunately, she is tragically diagnosed with breast cancer shortly after her birthday. She undergoes a double mastectomy and luckily fully recovers with a strong support network, but the stress has taken its toll on her and her health and she begins going grey early. Binghe, now also a girl yippee, received unexpected inheritance money sometimes during uni and used it to become a highly successful businesswoman with connections throughout the education, political, and publishing spheres (because she remembers shen yuan was a big reader and wanted to be a lit professor). Now on the hunt for her old teacher, she's tipped off to her new life by business partner gilf-fucker Mobei Jun (38) who recently started seducing sqh

misc: in her 20s sqh made some quick cash by donating sperm, so biologically she is actually probably a grandma at this point

[rainbowmothed]

︵︵ MISC. HAZBIN HOTEL HEADCANONS

╰ ⋯ ➢ just some random hcs i thought of off the top of my head!! ♡ as always, reblogs and likes appreciated! includes both main cast and heaven hcs. :3

𝜚 ₎ MAIN CAST HCS

Vaggie says stuff like “rad,” “dude,” etcetera unironically and definitely gets made fun of for it. Mostly by Cherri and Angel– Pentious says it is ‘hashtag trending awesome sauce.’

Vaggie sets 6 alarms in the morning, all with custom minute intervals between the snooze alarms to make SURE she doesn't sleep through it. Charlie doesn't mind, though, mainly because she wakes up at four in the morning to work on projects anyway.

Charlie has made playlists for everyone in the hotel on hell's equivalent of spotify; Vaggie's is the most well thought out, but they all describe them very well. Alastor never listens to it due to his dislike for modern technology/apps, but he appreciates it– or at least acts like he does– nonetheless.

Charlie definitely rides on Alastor's shoulders like a little kid bro IDC WHAT U SAY

Vaggie has cried ONCE in front of the rest of the hotel after being genuinely dogged on repeatedly on one of the worst days of her life, and they all just stared at her in shock. They hate on her so much because it never impacts her– or so they think so, because Vaggie always shrugs it off. They refuse to talk about it.

Vaggie's spice tolerance is unmatched.

Each night, Charlie visits Pentious’ memorial and wraps a weighted blanket around it, saying that maybe it'd remind him of the Egg Bois and the way they snuggled around him in the afterlife.

Vaggie is a huge Hunger Games fan. 90% of her personality derives from Katniss Everdeen.

Adding onto the last one, if Charlie and Vaggie were to have a child, I feel like it'd have the personality of Lucy Gray Baird.

Niffty definitely writes strange fanfiction. Also has BL as her header on the Hell's equivalent of Twitter. She's a little twisted, but we love her.

Cherri is an absolute menace. That is the best word to describe her.

Angel and Cherri did the “screaming in public restrooms” prank once.

Everyone assumed Charlie was mid-20s until she dropped the bomb that she's over 200 years old. They were all flabbergasted (minus Vaggie, who already knew. Angel also called her a “gilf lover.”)

Angel asked Vaggie about her body count once to tick her off, and she answered “around 1,000 or so, roughly estimated,” thinking he meant kill count. Charlie was shook.

Vaggie is a Paramore, Flyleaf, Evanescence, etcetera fan. Proud listener to 2000s emo girl music.

Charlie's guilty pleasure is punk/metal/rock music. She says she only listens to “Taylor Swift and musicals,” but she has a hidden playlist with KORN, PTV, and all of those bands on it.

Angel wakes Husk up by blasting Ayesha Erotica songs into his ear occasionally since Husk is a heavy sleeper and refuses to get up sometimes.

Pentious calls himself a “semi-proud father of the Egg Bois.”

Charlie ran a hate page about Katie Killjoy. She has since moved on from it... probably.

𝜚 ₎ HEAVEN HCS

Vaggie definitely played about 100 sports back in Heaven. Fencing, soccer, and, bare with me here, she definitely did ballet. She refuses to admit so, however.

The exorcists actually aren't brought into the world as adults. Instead, they're raised by volunteer parents of Heaven their entire lives, starting fighting training at age 6 or so. They claim that “children's brains are easier to mold.” Basically, they're taught to be murder weapons from a very, very young age. It's also instinctive, but it's the training that truly brings it out.

Each exterminator is based on a different bird breed, but the most common are eagles, falcons, hawks, and generally predatory avians.

The Exterminators are also very fast flyers, and they establish the quickest flyers through racing. Vaggie was formerly the fastest until she was cast down to Hell. Now, the fastest is Lute.

Adam also referees these races, and instead of a gun or whistle to start them off, he uses his guitar.

[gleniferskydays]

between phileaux's voice and mutt's autistic swag these boys also completely own even if they're not beefcake gilfs

[zal-cryptid]

i can kinda see what Krampus meant by "They'll never be the same"

Some aspects of what happened to them stays, like Eleanor still missing her eye and Paul seeming to retain his altered figure.

(I hope I'm not misreading this)

Mhm. At the end of the day, those toy bodies aren't separate bodies - they're still their bodies, just in a new form. Whatever damage or alteration done to their toy bodies would carry over if they hypothetically turned back. Eleanor wouldn't grow a new eye, and all those years of female toy hormones pumping through Paul would definitely change something.

The only thing that wouldn't change would be their ages. Because aging is a biological process, they would simply snap back to whatever age they were at when they were first transformed. Can you imagine all 170+ years catching up to Eleanor at once? Damn, that'd be brutal. But we would get a GILF Paul out of it.

Another interpretation of "never be the same again" could also include whatever character development they've all been through.

[natjennie]

"I love that she felt the need to lie on her cover letter and also- grendan is here" ahdslkfjsdf drawtectives.. literally grendan is THE character of all time. he has a sunhat and a walking stick. she's been to space and interviewed a bunch of ghosts. they're a dog walker. she goes by grendan g-ma and grandma. she uses any pronouns. they crush up leaves from their hat and say it's medicine. he's a sentimental drunk. she's actually a great detective. he solved a high profile murder on their first job. their best friends are a gilf private investigator who they refer to as their collective mom slash ancestral ghost, a half-orc model who has limited understanding of human culture, and a millennial thief with anxiety. he's the blueprint.

[melonteee]

ooooo is it garp hating hour? i know i know, grey morality and all that but i just literally cant fathom 'raising' a kid (well mostly throwing them at other people to raise just to come rough em up every few months), having them at one point ask if they deserve to live WHEN THEYRE NOT EVEN 13 YET because of someone elses actions, and then like. blaming them for their impending execution when they finally find a purpose that brings them happiness. and still acting like you loved them or truly cared for them.

especially when ace found HUNDREDS of people who loved him enough to put their lives on the line to save him AS A PIRATE, while his surrogate marine gramps literally sits there and watches.

pirates who then had enough love and honor to then ensure aces beloved little bro survives even after ace himself dies

bro. he wasnt happy at all under you. youre now THREE FOR THREE, no marines. the problem is you, garp. (and the system, but obviously)

i try to be impartial and understand where characters are coming from, but garp just... he knows too much! seen too many of the atrocities commited by marines and the world gov! he should 100% know better by this point!

garp is my breaking point baaaaaby!

(sengoku is also on thin ice but eh)

No fr you're right about all of this, Garp has an extreme victim complex to me.

"Ohhh why does my own son hate me?! Why does my grandson defy me!! Oh woe is me!! They just need to be marines!!!"

Maybe you're being a cunt towards them with your own bootlicking beliefs you STUPID!! STUPID GILF!!!! Sexy outside but a YUCKY INSIDE!!

However I think the point of Garp is he doesn't want to BELIEVE the marines are so bad to the point they're unfixable. Garp DOES see bad things in the marines, and he WANTS to fix it - but in doing so, he's made Koby! Who is now ALSO deliberately blind to the filthy ways of the marines. Koby HAS seen it (such as Captain Morgan and Akainu), and because he's following Garp's example, Koby believes he CAN fix the system from the inside with some elbow grease.

We KNOW the marines cannot be fixed from the inside, we have marines like Smoker who also know this and marches to the beat of his own drum due to how much he hates the marines and their false, taught sense of justice. Garp is even a VICE ADMIRAL and he STILL can't change whatever the hell he wanted to change!

Garp truly believes there IS justice in the marines, or justice in BEING a marine, and this is why he's such a bootlicker. He's an old man stuck in his old ways, and instead of seeing merit in or UNDERSTANDING the revolutionary army his son has started - he's decided that's the WRONG way to go about justice.

Garp believes old people are not worth saving or not welcome in the future, and in doing so, he's internalised this as an old man HIMSELF and refuses to change. It's kind of sad, but to me, Garp just doesn't want to realise he's been in the wrong his entire life.

[olderthannetfic]

The rumors of Discord moving to ban content being thirsty about minors gives me pause simply because the simplified style of the anime fandom I'm most active in renders all adults and teens other than the very elderly looking the same. It would be very easy for an anti to stumble onto fanart I've done of a character or hear me discussing a character, Google them and see what they perceive to be a child and slam the report button. It wouldn't even need to be a fictional minor, just a sufficiently shoujo one could lead to issues.

Which I bring up not to go, "Oh no, I, one of the good ones, will get caught in the crossfire!" I bring it up to say, as my mother always said to me, "Grenades are not precision weapons." This would screw over far more people than the intended targets, who aren't really doing anything wrong to start with if they're thirsting over fictional characters (or real people your own age; I see you, teens, and I support you). It's also never good when we don't get told what "fetishitic content" or "suggestive poses" are. Whenever rules are suggested that are so vague and so lacking in examples they could be replaced with, "I'll know it when I see it!", alarms go off in my head.

Considering this has happened with several other sites, I'm curious: do you think this same pattern of adopting stricter and stricter rules about content pertaining to minors and "minor looking" characters is going to continue for the foreseeable future? I've had hentai sites I use suddenly ban everything set in a school, even when the hentai is about a sexy substitute who seduces DILFs and GILFs at every school she goes to and the minors are about as sexualized as the lightbulbs and about as important. This pattern of "I'll know it when I see it and I've decided I see it where it isn't" appears to be more prevalent than I'd previously given it credit for.

--

Yes, I think this pattern will continue. The more money something is trying to make, the stronger the pattern will be.