#a B in a bio class isnt the end of the world. a B in a bio class isnt the end of the world. a B in a bio class isnt the end of the world

[bare1ythere]

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[solunova]

hey uh ib is... como se dice... a Fuck. like as someone who is still trying to recover psychologically after graduating and getting my diploma. like i was Smart Good At School and hung out with Smart Good At School and we were all dying the entire time. you may have some issues but like. shit's fucked man

(Another Anonymous said: Hey don’t stress yourself too much with ib stuff, they suck now and are so freaking stressful but they are definitely steps that will help you down the road (coming from someone who definitely credits all the ia and shit I had to write to helping me rewrite a 10 page college paper 3 days before it’s due and get an a on it) these things have their place in you academic journey (also don’t stress the ioc’s too much you have that knowledge in your brain you can do it!))

i guess before i start: thank you two. person 1 for validation in my pain and 2 for encouragement that ill be okay and that it isnt all for naught. i appreciate both of yall! 

but its my birthday at 1:40 am and im fucking SAD cause im up trying to write my entire bio ia due friday after some Complications came up so this is gonna be a mostly negative retrospective of my last two years and the circumstances that ive lived in due to the ib

i refuse to put this under a cut yall scroll past word walls anyways

so heres my hot and absolutely original take: i recognize that ib is extremely beneficial in certain regards. i know from everyone who took it telling me that its good for college experience and all that kind of stuff, both on a knowledge/content level and on, as person 2 describes, an “i cant get off my ass to write this paper in time” level and being able to compensate for that. i agree with that! I am extremely grateful for an increased class difficulty, especially in the fields where i knew what was happening already and spent classes bored until ib. and like! ib english is the first goddamn time ive EVER talked about the evils of imperialism and colonialism in an academic setting. that shit is vital to our future and yet no normal class talks about it!!! its terrible! and ib history is the first time ive ever enjoyed a history class and gotten even a margin of a good feeling out of it. like there are some really good parts of ib that ive written every damn college entry essay ive gotten on. i Know.

but like okay lets start with the fact that going into this that they (as in all ib teachers) were like “oh itll break you out of procrastination! itll teach you to constantly be studying!!! its what you need for college!!!!!” when it has done all of jack and shit to help us achieve that. its just kind of put us in the lions den and let us scramble at the walls for a foothold to get out or at least survive, maimed and depraved. if it sees us stopping to catch our breath, it shoots at our feet. the ibo extorts our misery to feed their mirth

lets also acknowledge that dumb fucks who take full ib, or even worse, those taking pseudo full ib (ie all classes but no diploma cause their extended essay busted and they gave up ie me) mostly take it due to extreme pressure, be it from their schools, their family, or their own psyche, saying they arent good enough if they dont take the highest offered classes, or even more that if they arent doing well in those classes its a product of their own shortcomings and then spend most of the rest of the time in ib degrading themselves because no matter how much time they put in they cant be the best and all that fun stuff. ib kids are put on a sort of pedestal by the school but then left on their own. 

i, of course, see this as a much greater academic institution integrated mindset that needs to be addressed and challenged, but to force it on kids who have to not only go through with it for the next four years, but also because its targeted at these kids that are higher achieving “gifted and talented” fucking whatever, most likely the rest of their lives?

its straight up psychologically damaging to give such a rigorous course load and no help for the effects and self esteem issues from it, no help for the people who dont know how to give up and instead run themselves in the fucking dirt and strain themselves to the edges of their goddamn sanity, spending what little time is left in their adolescence treating themselves like shit

idealistically, ib is wonderful. i think it carries out some of its best traits (integrating global thinking, allowing a more freeform discussion of many things, etc), but i also recognize how absolutely full of shit it is in many corners (regarding encouraging service, intellectual honesty, whatever else), one, and that a lot of people are just.. not up to the task. they may have the ability intellectually, but not mentally. i firmly believe that anyone can do anything if they set their minds to it but i have become the victim of my own philosophy because that came at the expense of my well-being.

and the fact that when i tried to tell my coordinator this she a) did not let me just NOT do the ee despite how strained i was(which i didnt end up doing, lick my whole dick mrs kurtz) and stole my summer from me because between being depressed as hell at gsp i was a nervous wreck about what they could do to me or how i was going to accomplish anything that i needed to, and that i havent had a proper break from school in three straight years, that im still running on empty essentially and b) that when i told the other ib coordinator, 4 months later, theres not a souls chance in hell that i was gonna fucking do it, that she lectured me and made me cry in class about how “you cant see the forest for the trees” “thisll help you later in life” “youre throwing away jobs” all that fun stuff like

its evil

the lack of care that often goes into it

the extreme magnitude of work that, sure, is feasibly possible for a 16-18 year old to do, but here theyre expected to

the fact that the classes fall in a time where gpa is so absolutely vital to colleges and scholarships (and given that its these ib kids’ personality and intellectual dispositions, even more so - both in esteem and necessity)

the fact that so many of the classes and so much of the coursework is empty, ultimately

its kind of a bad system

not even to MENTION the egotistical complexes, both inwardly as addressed and outwardly as in being the most godawful kind of people that manifests in these people that think theyre gods gift to the world cause they took ib and “if you spend time bitching about ib you deserve to fail because that was time you could have spent working” like you sound like the worst kind of person and i dont fucking care. theres a girl in my classes who is so upset every time someone doesnt listen to her because she thinks everything she has to say is the goddamn gospel and ib really attracts these kinds of people and its the WORST

[chickpeabinch]

just a dumb ramble about me worrying about life/career/future stuff its super long so ill spare yall and put it under a read more 

for most of my childhood i was like, im gonna b a doctor!!!! like i said it once when i was very little and my mom REALLY liked that so she definitely encouraged the idea and she still does now. she doesnt force me or anything but she like.. drops hints that she still wants me to become one. she’s like “oh you gonna buy me a house/car/other expensive miscellaneous things when you’re a DOCTOR??” and im like haha yeah..also for this christmas she went ahead and bought me.. a doctor barbie. a barbie. just bc she wanted to enforce the fact that YOU ARE A DOCTOR!!!!!!! like ugh) but to be completely honest i’ve def been having second thoughts especially after my first semester of college. im a bio major which means a LOOOT of math and science classes (two things im god awful at) i think i handled it kind of okay like i got for the most part bs and b minuses (the only reason i got a b- in chemistry is bc there was like a HUGE curve LOL) but still ive realized that science in general im just like.. not that interested in it. like of course science is VERY VERY cool and important but im just not SUPER interested in like.. doing it. esp as a career. its not even just that its hard as fuc (which it is) but most of the people i know who are in, say, like, chemistry are either good at it or are okay with it and are interested in it at least a little bit. ive tried caring but i just DONT like its not interesting to me in the slightest. but the thing is, i dont know if im just being lazy or whatever bc i do feel like i didnt work as hard this past semester as i couldve. but how can i excel in something i dont care about?? how can i study something i dont care about super hard?? so having that on my shoulders in ADDITION to my adhd getting worse has really taken it’s toll on me and it sucks. the money that comes with being a doctor is literally the only thing that really appealed to be about being one. i grew up pretty poor and it fucking sucked and it still sucks. i went through this stage where i was extremely money hungry and just wanted to do what would make me the most money, and not what would make me happy. i usually argued like oh, but money would make me happy that’s all that matters. which yeah money WOULD make me happy but after a couple of years of being stuck in something i wasnt passionate or happy doing like?? what would i even do???? i dont know i really dont know

lately ive been interested in switching from majoring in biology to early childhood education. i wanna be a kindergarten teacher (or maybe even a child psychologist) bc i really love kids (and ive been told im pretty good w them too) and i just feel like i would be happier in it. not only does it sound like an enjoyable job for me but it also doesnt take up all of your day like being a doctor does. like i would want a career that would let me still like.. have a life like i would still want time to do the stuff i love like drawing, baking, maybe even having my own garden. the only thing holding me back is that kindergarten teachers dont really get paid a lot. the pay isnt terrible, especially considering it’s more than what my parents currently make. i think i could make it as one, but im just scared that in the future, if i do make this huge decision now, i’ll end up regretting in and be stuck. another thing is what my mom will think. ive told my dad and hes chill w/ it and wants me to be in something that allows me to have the kind of life i want, and i dont think my mom would be mad at me or anything but i know she’ll be disappointed in me. and i told my sister and she was like “omg no i have friends who went into teaching and they HATE IT and they cant afford anything!!! be a doctor!!!!!” and that just made me really upset. i DO want to be living comfortably but the medical field isnt something im really interested in nor do i want to do for the rest of my life. but i dont know if i’d end up ALSO regretting becoming a teacher. aghh i have no idea im gonna give it one more semester of being a bio major and seeing if i like it any better i guess but i feel? most likely want to change my major to early childhood education w maybe a minor in psychology??? IDK

its just, when i think about becoming a kindergarten teacher INSTEAD of a doctor, and how that is 100% an option for me right now, the world feels so much lighter and i feel like i can actually breathe

[malusvio]

Libertarian Socialist Synthesism

My name is Rose, I am a Libertarian Socialist Synthesist. I fuse ideas from Communalism, Anarcho-Communism, Council Communism, and Marxian critique of capitalism 1) Libertarian Socialist A)  Against all forms of tyrannical and/or centralized authority and replaced instead with de-centralized direct democracy. Opposed to authoritarian socialist tendencies such as Leninism, Marxism-Leninism, Trotskyism, and Maoism. B) Workers should democratically own their workplaces. Rather than having shareholders, a CEO, and board of directors decide what to produce, how to produce it, where to produce it, etc. those will be decided by the workers who work in the workplace C) Elimination of producing things to be treated as commodities. In a world where we are driven under capitalism by profit, resources should rather be distributed according to need 2) Communist A) Abolition of the state, which is a centralized institution ruled by a small elite who govern a bordered area and claim a monopoly on violence inside (and even outside through imperialism) those borders, and replaced with individual de-centralized communes B) Abolition of social classes, where we live in a world where, instead of privilege and status where the few rule over the majority, instead everyone will be equal without privilege. There will no longer be proletariat, lumpenproletariat, landlords, peasantry, bourgeoisie, or petite bourgeoisie, there will only be us, humans. C) Abolition of money in place of Mutual Aid, as proposed by Pyotr Kropotkin, Russian evolutionary scientist who proposed the best of the species survived, not by Darwin’s idea of survival of the fittest, but rather by those who help each other in mutual aid. In a world where we are ruled by profits, we must, as said in the socialist section, distribute resources according to need, not profit

3) Anarchist A) The idea that any hierarchical structure that cannot prove it’s legitimacy must be dismantled and replaced with something else, including the state, capitalism, and landlords, and that hierarchies should be replaced with horizontal organization instead of vertical B) The idea that consent is important in an economical system and social relations

4) Communalist A) Social Ecology, the socio-historical analysis of the development of hierarchy and freedom. It espouses a reconstructive, ecological, communitarian, and ethical approach to society and advocates for a reconstructive and transformative outlook on social and environmental issues, directly democratic confederal politics, and evnisions a moral economy that moves beyond scarcity and hierarchy toward a world that reharmonizes human communities with the natural world while celebrating diversity, creativity, and freedom, and that the roots of current ecological and social problems can be traced to hierarchical modes of social organization, and hierarchy cannot be resisted by individual actions alone such as ethical consumerism but must be addressed by more nuanced ethical thinking and collective activity grounded in radically democratic ideals. The complexity of relationships between people and nature is empasized, along with the importance of establishing more mutualistic social structures that take account of this B) Dialectical Naturalism, the ethics and philosophy of communalism that follows a dialectical pattern through the lense of nature rather than Hegel’s Historical Dialects or Marx’s Dialectical Materialism C) Libertarian Municipalism, the idea that we should have local assemblies within a municipality (town, city, village, tc) where citizens are encouraged to participate in directly democratically making decisions, where those assemblies can unite toward a common goal under confederations, and elected delegates that can be immediately recalled at any point for any reason by those who elected them as well as frequently rotated, and those delegates carry out additional tasks to the ones they already carry out. For more information on Libertarian Municipalism, please read here https://theanarchistlibrary.org/library/murray-bookchin-libertarian-municipalism-the-new-municipal-agenda D) Automation should be encouraged to replace menial and rather boring and harmful jobs that no one wants to engage in, giving us more leisure time to enjoy with our friends and family and engage in hobbies we enjoy F) The idea that any hierarchical structure that cannot prove it’s legitimacy must be dismantled and replaced with something else, including the state, capitalism, and landlords, and that hierarchies should be replaced with horizontal organization instead of vertical 5) Council Communism A) The workplace should be directly democratic with worker councils consisting of the workers within a workplace electing delegates that can be immediately recalled for any reason at any time and the position is frequently rotated. For more information on Council Communism please refer here https://malusvio.tumblr.com/post/177301953987/council-communism-councilism and here https://libcom.org/thought/council-communism-an-introduction B) The idea that revolution is a process. As Antonie Pannekoek wrote quote: ”The revolution by which the working class will win mastery and freedom, is not a single event of limited duration. It is a process of organization, of self-education, in which the workers gradually, now in progressing rise, then in steps and leaps, develop the force to vanquish the bourgeoisie, to destroy capitalism, and to build up their new system of collective production.” C) parliamentary debates and propaganda during election campaigns could be used to ‘enlighten the workers about their class situation’. However parliamentary debates and worker unions should not be the main focus in developing class consciousness, as the workers must take action themselves D) Organization and class consciousness are linked through a dialectical relationship. New forms of struggle and organization arise spontaneously, in the sense that they are not planned consciously in advance, and they arise as a practical response to the problems faced by workers in the course of their struggles. Once these new forms have arisen, however, they can be made more widely known, and other groups of workers can begin to act on their example. 6) Marxian (as opposed to Marxist) A) Criticisms of Capitalism including the idea that workers are alienated from their work when the fruits of the worker’s labor ends up in the hands of the employer; The idea that workers are exploited and extracted for their surplus value, the amount of labor that one puts into a product has a portion of the worth of the product they built taken from them and given to the employer, creating further alienation; that Capitalism is a contradiction-laden system with recurring crises coming from tendency of the rate of profit to fall; Capitalism is another stage in the evolution of economic systems; and many other criticisms.

7) Other A) I oppose a violent revolution, as appealing as it sounds, instead I support Democratic Autonomy as a method to achieving a socialist society. I’m not saying I oppose all violence. I support violent resistance to fascism, but a full-blown revolutionary war would kill millions and wreck havoc on the environment. Violent revolutions are a distraction if you have well-developed tech and infastructure. Just build an alt-government on anarchist principles and ignore what the state and capitalists are doing and build good things. I will support the revolution everyone fetishizes if it happens but theres risk of it failing, degrading into fascism or reverting back to capitalism. So what we must do is normalize socialism, organize socialists around mutual aid and charity works to improve our image and accomplish more than LARPing, build power inside and out of the existing power structures, institutions, unions, and organizations, engage in mass strikes and non violent demonstrations. Police attacking non-violent protestors or demonstrators is a bad look, makes us look good. Modern revolutions are won in the arena of public opinion. When 75 million people decide to back something, fighting it with violence isnt possible. The reason for 75 million is that the civilian casualties would run into the tens of millions if bio or nuclear weapons were used. 75 million is ¼ the US population and you arent gonna win revolution without that much support. The state is going to smear us as terrorists when we get violent, and use that as justification to impose all kinds of evil legislation. The United States alone has over 350 million people. Are we really willing to let that many people get slaughtered, and have our hometowns look like what Afrin looks like today? Are we willing to provoke nuclear war and wipe out the entire continent? Dust thrown into the air would block the sun, radiation would contaminate food and water. Instead I support, as I said, setting Democratic Autonomy, in which Libertarian Socialists infiltrate the nation-state’s government alongside Libertarian Municipalities and Worker Councils being set up immediately, ignoring what the nation-state’s government says, setting up counter-power, while simultaneously leeching off of it. This is a non-violent revolution. For more information read here http://daf-sd.org/assets/daf_supporterintroduction.pdf B) Prefigurative politics is important. It is important for us to act in a way in our current capitalist society as we would after it. If we are to have a violent revolution that succeeds, we need there to be no leaders during it, just as we would after it Influences Karl Marx Antonie Pannekoek Joseph Dejacque Pierre Joseph-Proudhon Mikhail Bakunin Pyotr Kropotkin Nestor Makhno Emma Goldman Lucy Parsons Murray Bookchin Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel Various Twitter & Discord Users Libertarian Socialist Rants Anarchopac My friends