#a cog in someone else's scheme

[classpect-sideblog]

Anakin skywalker is a bard of hope.

[tiredandoptimistic]

Radar really is in such an interesting position relative to the 4077. The rest of them are doctors. Hawkeye frequently bemoans his role as "weapons repair" and is clearly uncomfortable with fixing people up so they can go back and get shot, but he's still fundamentally only engaging with the war as a healer. When he's off duty (and even while he's working), Hawkeye is able to focus his energy on "the war against the war" by throwing parties and pulling pranks. He takes every opportunity to show his disrespect for the whole military machine, and only plays by their rules when it goes along with his moral imperative to heal the dying.

Radar, on the other hand, is the motor that keeps MASH running. He helps Hawkeye and the others with their schemes, but he also has to be the one to deal with the fallout. When Hawkeye gets his shift as "Commander Pierce," Radar is the one frantically trying to get him to actually fill out the required paperwork, because Hawkeye's "this is dumb and I won't engage with it" attitude to the army doesn't work for someone in an organizational position. The rest of them turn up their noses at army bureaucracy, but Radar is the one to understand how it all works and get them what they want despite the layers of red tape. He has to be the guy delivering bad news and sneaking around to steal people's stoves, and he isn't choosing to do it but it still has to get done. He's the one who announces incoming choppers, meaning that he basically always has to be the person to spoil everyone else's day. Fun's over, Radar's here. His name is literally a direct symbol of his role as a harbinger. He isn't the one responsible though. If he wasn't there to sound the alarm, there'd be just as many wounded and even less time to prepare.

He's got a bit of separation between himself and the casualties (unlike the doctors who are literally digging around in blood and guts for twelve hours at a time), but his position as company clerk means that he's also unable to truly clock out. Radar literally sleeps in his office, because it's his entire life. He's always going to be the guy with a foot in reality who tempers the officers' wackiness. Even when he got offered a ticket home, his first instinct was to turn it down because he didn't think that the 4077th could function without him.

This is significant to me because of how it reflects on the characters role in the war overall. Hawkeye is able to act like he's separate from the military, but he's sometimes forced to reckon with the fact that he's a cog in the machine like everyone else. Radar is often forced to serve as the hand of the army in the 4077th, but his job of keeping things running smoothly does just as much to save lives as any of the doctors. They're all soldiers who have to play by the army's rules to some extent if they want to keep anybody safe.

[awarmbowlofhomemadesoup]

Transformers One: What They Value and Rely On Split Orion and D-16 Apart

Orion Pax and D-16 are one of those friendships in which they're opposites, and that's not really a problem until a significant change comes along.

Being opposites isn't so bad. At times, they complement each other. It's just that they put value on different things.

(spoilers down below)

Let's Talk About the Life of a Miner

Long before World Wars One and Two started, US miners had already been fighting for their rights against grim conditions. In some cases, they have to pay rent to their employers and buy their own supplies with fake money that they can only exchange in stores owned by said employers.

The life of a cog-less miner is not so different:

They don't own a home.

They are crowded in specialized dormitories in standing, cramped recharging berths.

If Orion can afford a decal for Dee, then it's obvious that they're getting paid, but not enough for them to live independently.

Their options to improve their lives are limited, and they can get fired for accidents beyond their control (Elita-1).

Furthermore, both in real life and in the movie, mining is a dangerous profession enforced by people who don't mine. (Hey, Pinkerton Agency, guess which one of my fingers can transform)

It's no wonder Orion Pax questions if things could be better for them.

What Does Orion Pax Put Value In

Many of these miners have accepted their reality and focused on their function. But Orion wants to help in other ways. If they can help find the Matrix of Leadership, then they don't have to endure such conditions because Energon would flow again.

So, what does Orion value? The betterment of not just his life, but everyone's.

But there's something else he puts value in so much that he relies on it so much.

Throughout the movie, Orion Pax is shown to think quickly under pressure. His quick thinking and improvisation have helped him escape the guards at the archive, free Jazz enough to save the rest of him from the mining accident and get ahead of the race.

But in the movie, it's not his quick thinking that he puts value in so much that he relies on it.

No. That would be his friendship with D-16.

Why does he insist that D-16 come with him to the Iacon 5000? Why does he want Dee to go with him to the surface to find the Matrix?

Because he knows he can't do it alone. He needs someone to watch his back as he would with him.

What Does D-16 Put Value In

D-16 puts value on strength. Not just his own but also the power over him. Dee is a very strong guy, even as cog-less. He's definitely bigger than the other miners and can stop a punch from Darkwing.

Being strong, he can endure a lot of stuff (probably including Orion's tendency to get into trouble finding clues about the Matrix). He had accepted the system that they lived in because he could endure it enough to get to places like being on the top leader board of their sector.

His strength also makes him reliable. He sees things through, making him one of the best miners, as Sentinel has acknowledged, and he doesn't bail out when he complains about things.

But that's the problem, when he complains about things, there's something I've noticed.

Dee is pretty much logical to Orion's idealism. Where Orion dreams about better things for everyone, Dee accepts what is and plays its game to win at life.

But when things go wrong, Dee is quick to blame Orion, even when it's not Orion's fault. I can understand Dee blaming Orion for most likely getting into trouble for entering a race for Transformers. But when they find out the truth, Dee quickly blames Orion because they are in danger for knowing the truth.

It is understandable for him to think that, but unfair in the grand scheme of things when it's the system's fault (also Darkwing's pettiness).

My only understanding, though I may be wrong, is that Dee focuses on power. He's focused on the power of the system that they are in than the need to let everyone know the truth. That they cannot do anything because Sentinel has the power and they don't.

Which is pretty logical, they have to be careful. But Dee isn't focused on caution. He's angry enough to kill him, but he just feels powerless. (Negatron, lol)

And when Dee was given the power, he started turning into a different person. Or rather, what kind of person he would be if he has the power to change things.

The Climactic Breakup

In the later half of the movie, we can see Orion's perspective of D-16 turning into a person he no longer recognizes.

He tried to talk to him after escaping Sentinel's bots but they got kidnapped by the High Guard.

He tried to intervene when Dee beat up Starscream, but Airachneed and co. attacked them.

Finally, he tried to stop him from killing Sentinel. He knows Dee. He knows Dee would see the job through. He's not just going to stop at one. (And he was right, he wasn't just there to see it.)

In Dee's perspective, Sentinel had taken away their power. Dee was going to make him pay and take his power. Power that Sentinel never deserved and stole from Megatronus.

Orion tried to stop him but was blasted. At this point, perhaps saving Orion has become second nature to Dee over the years of their friendship.

But because Dee values power and Orion is becoming an obstacle to it, Dee makes a choice.

And the rest is history.

What Orion Pax Already Knows That D-16 Will Take Millions of Years to Realize

D-16 relies on strength, and Orion Pax relies value on friendship. There's this YouTube short by @EdFormers that shows the parallel between their hands when they save the other.

When Orion saves Dee in Iacon 5000, his hand is already dropped. He has lost his jetpack, and he knows there's nothing he can do about it. But when Dee saves Megatron after Dee blasts him, Orion's hand is up because he has faith Dee will save him.

When Optimus realizes power is more important for Megatron over what they have, he mourned about it. He told Megatron, "We could have built the future together," because he knows what they could do together.

Back when they were cog-less, they were able to save Jazz and almost win the Iacon 5000. Dee was the realist to Orion's dreamer. When Dee sees a dead end, Orion sees a window they can jump through. They have each other's back regardless of the fact that Dee wants to better his life and Orion wants to better everyone's including Dee in a way Dee couldn't see.

Until Dee doesn't have his back.

What I'm saying is that they make a great team, what more now that they have cogs? Optimus sees that. Megatron doesn't.

And he won't, even when the Quintessons would come for both Autobots and Decepticons. And he wouldn't, even after millions of years of fighting each other at the cost of Cybertron itself, that they end up warring on Earth.

Because they rely on different things because they value different things, even if they have the same goal.

But when they will finally be on the same page, I believe Optimus Prime and Megatron would be able to achieve greater things.

In the old comics by Marvel, Bob Budiansky made a bio for Optimus Prime where he described that if he was less compassionate and caring, he would have been a more effective military commander. But then, he wouldn’t be Optimus Prime. 

I know one guy who could balance him out.

[jinuaei]

Idk if you’ve watched Arcane before but in season 2 , episode 7 when one of the characters called Powder danced in like a club, all dressed up and pretty ready to dance with her Ekko

https://vt.tiktok.com/ZSrbSG16E/

Like imagine the reader dressing up, all pdolled up just like that walking towards Tarn, tapping on his pede to get his attention like that:

“So…how do I look? It’s not my best look but I did everything I can to look like this so any thoughts, Tarn?”

Oh boy, he dropped his imaginary jaw on the ground, damn near barking at the sight and plot twist: the color pallet they wear based off of is purple, instead of the blue eyeshadow, it’s purple and it will not help that situation at all because Tarn will think that his little deity is secretly hinting that his affection is reciprocated. Bro was having heart eyes, staring at them silently, wondering if he should take em to pound town now until they ask him:

“I’m having prom tonight with someone. Do you think I look okay?”

Wait, so it’s not for him? Bro went through 7 stages of grief and anger in mere seconds, sad that it’s not for him and at the same time, energon boiling in his vein wondering what foul heretic had stolen his deity’s spark

I haven't watched Arcane unfortunately!

BUT AW THE POOR BABY!!! Imagine it's the same shade of purple as his frame or maybe your whole outfit has the same colour scheme as his. He'd be sooo excited, getting closer to you to closely see your whole get up, maybe make you twirl holding onto his digit. He has heard of couples using colour as a way to match with each other, and he thought it was your way of claiming him.

So imagine his shock when you mentioned having prom with someone else! He'd be spark broken! Betrayed! (Not really, you could never betray him!) But then he had the great idea to escort you to this...'prom' that you were talking about. You said yes, perhaps to keep him from being sad, so now you are rocking up to your prom in a literal tank. (He had to visit Pharma again for a t-cog)

Depending on what's funnier, it can go two ways — either he waits outside, peeking in from the windows, which you definitely notice because there's a literal red spotlight on you at all times which you can especially see when it's dark.

OR he goes inside with you, and now there's a whole Decepticon in the corner of the room staring your partner down, so close to adding that organic to his body count. But every time you look back at him all you can see is his puppy dog optics. You may think him cute but your date is close to shitting themselves.

Hey, maybe you'll be kind to him after the party and let him remove your clothes and have your own party ;)

[quibbs126]

Okay, I have…a design for Lux here

Honestly, it still isn’t the best. Probably on me for spending all of today trying to make a design that worked and not taking more time

Probably should have also colored those practice sketches of Megatron and Optimus, and maybe drawn more of them too, probably would have helped in the long run, as well as let me figure out their colors again since it has apparently been a long time since I drew them

But oh well, I have something, so at least now I can tell you about Lux herself

These are the other previous sketches relating to her by the way, just for posterity’s sake

I thought giving her this younger design based on the cogless bots would have been easier than working out her adult, alt mode based design, since the cogless bots don’t have alt modes. But the problem is, their frames are still based on parts of their alt mode, just not to any extent that it’s actual kibble, just alluding to it, if that makes sense. So you know, I had to have an idea of how her normal frame looks. Which I didn’t. So it was harder than I wanted it to be, and this is what I got in the end

I need to figure out a proper full design for her I think. I still have TFA and TFE Megatron for my inspirations, along with some copters, I just need to figure out how to put them all together

She very much looks like a D-16 painted blue like this, but whatevs

Her trapezoid and arm circles are supposed to be the few references to her alt mode I have, that being her front with the trapezoid, and potentially where her propellers go on her body. I don’t actually know where to put them realistically, but I think it’d be cool if she could use them like blades in combat

For now, I think I’m sticking with that blue, grey and black color scheme for her, and the yellow eyes work fine

Design’s serviceable enough for now, but needs work I think

But anyways, on to the real thing I wanted to discuss here, her lore. Or I suppose more accurately, her relationship with Megatron, since that’s most of what I have on her honestly

Okay, so first off, Megatron was the one to carry her, which I’m noticing is a running theme of mine. Now I’m not sure when exactly he would have been sparked, but let’s say for the sake of things, between getting their T-cogs and meeting the High Guard. The main thing is that this would have been just before Orion and D-16 fell out and Megatron was banished

Some weeks or so after, particularly during moments where he’s feeling incredibly distraught over everything that happened and feels incredibly isolated, Megatron started to feel something else around his spark. He couldn’t quite place what it was, it was too vague and small to be able to tell, like a very faint pulse on his spark, but something about it gave him comfort, while giving it back to the strange feeling. He wasn’t sure what this thing was, but he figured he either made it up as a coping mechanism, or it might be because the cog he had used to belong to someone else, and it was affecting him weirdly. But he didn’t really tell anyone, since he didn’t want to admit it made him feel better like some immature child, and again, he didn’t think it was anything important. He just considered it the “little light” on his spark

Only to find out much later, on complete accident, that that “light” he was feeling was in fact, a sparkling. His and Orion’s at that. No one knew he was carrying, pretty much because he had grown too big for it to make a noticeable impact on his body (and anything that did was assumed because of his enormous rapid growth spurt), and because also no one was looking for it. But one accident a bit too damaging led to him needing a full body scan for all his injuries, and a close to fully formed sparklet was revealed to be in his forge

And unfortunately because of how late anyone found it, as well as the fact that the Decepticons are very lacking in proper medical equipment, Megatron pretty much has to carry the thing to term now, much to his frustration. I needed a reason for him to not deletus that fetus. He hates the idea of this at first, hating Orion/Optimus for putting him in this situation, hating the High Guard for being ignorant enough to have not found this sooner when he could have gotten rid of it (which they kind of have to concede the point there), and hating the universe for this fate

But he does eventually start to come around more to the idea, particularly when he realizes that this sparkling was the same thing that’s been giving him comfort in these turbulent times, and when it comes to mind that this is the last thing he has of Orion, not really choosing to see Optimus as Orion, just who came back after his death. The best idea the Decepticons had for what to do with the sparkling after it was born was to just send it to Iacon, making the Prime deal with his mistake, but Megatron grew more and more hesitant of the idea

And then when the day came that the sparkling was born, he was more conflicted than ever, now that he could actually hold it in his hands and see her for himself. While he didn’t give an answer at first as to whether he wanted to get rid of her, he eventually decided that he indeed wanted to keep her, naming her Lux

It wasn’t the ideal option for the Decepticons, sending her to Iacon would have been the best choice, but during the time before the sparkling was born, they figured that since they no longer had an Energon shortage and weren’t being hunted down, it wasn’t impossible for them to care for a sparkling should that be the decision, though the lack of medical supplies would be a worry

But basically after Lux was born, plenty of the Decepticons pitched in to try and help Megatron with her, since he’s their very young leader and now single parent, and again, kind of their fault for not noticing. Also they haven’t seen a sparkling in ages and she’s cute. Thundercracker happens to be her favorite babysitter. Soundwave is another top tier babysitter, but she just likes him more

This is also what gets Megatron to finally properly start opening up and trusting the High Guard, since he knows he can’t take care of Lux all by himself, especially since he knows very little about sparklings. And if they can be proven trusted with her, maybe he can trust them with other things as well

But one other thing, Megatron does not tell Optimus that Lux exists whatsoever, and he doesn’t want him to know. Part of it is to spite Optimus, excluding him from something he too would probably find so precious. But another part that progressively grows bigger is fear; the fear that if he knew, he would take Lux away from Megatron, never to see her again

While part of it is paranoia, it’s not entirely unreasonable either. Optimus lives in a giant city while Megatron lives out in the wild, Optimus has access to everything she might need or want, Megatron and the High Guard are essentially criminals and could be considered dangerous to a young sparkling, and Optimus is the Prime and ruler of Iacon. Even if he might have the decency to consider letting Megatron keep his sparkling, someone else in Iacon might try to fight for Lux to stay in Iacon instead, possibly even taking matters into their own hands. So he won’t tell Optimus, for as long as he possibly can

Megatron does genuinely care for and love Lux, but he’s also not the best parent either. He’s a bit emotionally dependent on her, with her being that last bit of Orion, and someone who unconditionally loves him, and it does feed a bit into his fear of her being taken from him; he also doesn’t really want her to leave. It may be something he eventually learns to grow out of, as it’s really not healthy for either of them, but it could also not. But at least for now, this dependency isn’t too egregious, nor is it something Lux takes notice of, or something the other Decepticons warn Megatron about

I suppose I should actually get into Lux herself. Though to be honest, I don’t have a lot on her anyways, outside of her backstory

I do have that she’s generally a cheery little bot, and she really likes the surface, particularly the animals up there. Thundercracker is her favorite guy, outside of her carrier, and them both being blue possibly has something to do with it. She’s also probably a little too okay with violence for someone her age, due to the company she finds herself in. They may be her responsible guardians, but they’re definitely teaching her ways to kill

She also has this thing of, if she does not understand why a rule exists, she does not listen to it. It made the first few cycles with her very difficult, and a testament to Megatron that she really was Orion’s sparkling. She has a habit of sneaking out a lot, though usually it’s just to watch animals or something harmless

Though this could extend to her being prohibited from ever going to or near Iacon. She may not go now, accepting the explanation that dangerous enemies live there, but that explanation may not hold up the longer she observes it, and she may one day decide the rule’s worth breaking. But will she go to Iacon and what chaos will ensue if she does? I don’t know

I mean I imagine at some point Optimus eventually learns of Lux’s existence, I just don’t know the specific circumstances as to how yet, or when. She could sneak into Iacon as a child, it could be a Quintesson attack mixed with a Decepticon encounter that weeds her out via Megatron trying to protect her, it could be Airachnid kidnapping her, or they don’t encounter until she’s properly grown. I’m not sure yet

But yeah, I think that’s all I have on her lore for now, and honestly it’s getting pretty late, so I should probably just end things here

She needs more working, but I have a lot about Lux, so I just needed to share

[polarislex]

id rather be crazy like you 𓂃۶ৎ

Jisung was never meant to be the villain, yet the weight of his family’s legacy often made him feel like he was one. The son of Mr. Smee, the loyal but quiet first mate of Captain Hook, Jisung was always overshadowed by larger-than-life figures, by stories of grand adventures and brutal betrayal. But Jisung was different from his father, whose loyalty was never questioned. Jisung never saw himself as just a sidekick, just an extension of another’s will.

He didn’t mind the quiet life, but the reality was that as the son of someone tied to the infamous pirate world, he was always going to be dragged into the chaos, whether he liked it or not. Jisung was the dreamer, a quiet observer, and someone who craved simplicity. He’d been raised on the ship, learned the ropes, but his heart was always more attuned to the peaceful moments when the ocean calmed, when the storm passed. He had no interest in the bloodshed, the constant thirst for control, or the petty schemes of his father’s world. But that didn’t mean he didn’t have a part to play in it.

Jisung wasn’t foolish. He understood the power of loyalty—he knew how it kept everything in line. His father’s devotion to Hook was unshakable, but Jisung? He was beginning to question everything. Loyalty was a double-edged sword, and while his father’s blind allegiance had kept him safe, it had never truly set him free.

The pirates saw Jisung as weak, soft, maybe even naive. They didn’t see the spark behind his calm demeanor. He wasn’t afraid to make hard decisions when it mattered. He wasn’t afraid of a fight if it meant protecting what little he had left. But he wasn’t one to seek the limelight, not the way others did. His strength lay in silence, in moments when no one was watching, when he could just breathe without the constant push of expectations.

Yet, the more Jisung tried to distance himself from the legacy of pirates, the more the tug of his bloodline seemed to draw him in. He wasn’t his father, and he wasn’t Captain Hook’s heir. But the deeper he got into this world, the more he realized he couldn’t escape the shadows of the people who came before him. His mother’s world had been chaotic, loud, and full of betrayal, and no matter how far he ran, it always seemed to catch up with him.

Jisung just wanted peace. He wanted to know what it was like to be seen for who he truly was, not as the son of a loyal pirate, not as a cog in someone else's machine. He didn’t have the same ambitions, the same drive to dominate. But he knew, deep down, that whether he liked it or not, his past would always haunt him. And in the end, he’d have to decide whether he would follow in his father’s footsteps, live up to the quiet legacy of Mr. Smee, or forge a different path entirely.

ao3 link | masterthread link |

[white-cat-of-doom]

One Idea Is To Be Useful

A lifetime of decisions made for survival, but living is not always impactful if you have nothing to show for it in the end and no one to remember you. Thus, an idea.

My piece for the @namingofcatszine, here formatted to have the italics (to primarily represent an internal thought process) that unfortunately never made it into the printed copy restored, as well as some more breathing room between paragraphs that was not an option with the page limit restrictions.

Thank you to everyone who contributed, to the fellow Moderator team, and to Peach for organizing this and being the lead Moderator, but especially to the six other writers that I had the honour of overseeing as the Writing Moderator for the project. We took up more pages individually than anyone else! ;)

Bravado was a funny thing in hindsight. Everyone wants to be the hero in the end after all, do they not? Jumping in to save the day, perhaps even to rescue someone, with no thought of self-preservation or consequence. Once you had everything under control, the shower of praise and glory cascading down on you in celebration of your achievement would seem like a welcome reward.

All that sounded great in his head at that pivotal moment for Alonzo. It was his chance to prove himself as a valuable protector instead of one of the many henchcats of the Mouser’s Palace he was once a part of. An opportunity to cut himself further free of the threads of the past and to push back against the oppressor that so many had been crushed under, some of which never made it out alive.

How many Cats indeed had he seen erased from this world at the cruel hands of Macavity, or one of the ruthless minions of the Mystery Cat? A good majority of those Cats were subjected to the lottery of suffering, strictly because that they had nowhere else to turn. Life on the streets meant that the fear of being attacked was a real possibility if you stepped foot in certain parts of the city, with the twisted stories of the Mystery Cat permeating throughout the underground circles of the disenfranchised. Macavity’s name carried with it such a weight that you were almost afraid to speak it aloud lest someone be closely listening to what words followed. He had eyes and ears everywhere, if that were to be believed, and few wanted to find out how much truth was held in that understanding. With the rumours, The Mouser's Palace, in theory, brought supposed comradery with an avenue of protection over the uncertainty and anxiety of solitary survival. In reality, that was not quite the case. One not only had to fight to ensure that they were worthy in line with the other rogues employed, but also to keep daily business of the empire going.

A fight for life at all times in the end, as Alonzo would find out. He was a smart Cat, always one to calculate and consider his next move in the chess game he found himself, at first indirectly, involved in life. He had faced the scorn directed towards him for prolonged indecision time and time again, even after joining and working his way up through the ranks of henchcats. Thinking things through was not commonplace in those groups, with the majority taking a more hands-on approach to accomplishing their goals. It was an effective, time-proven method in some cases, after all.

He never felt that anyone trusted his judgement, and realistically why should they? He was no one and had always been. His choices used to only be a cog to turn the machine; one that was redundant and replaceable in the grand scheme of things.

Alonzo never thought that he, too, would have to take the same physical approach that henchcats resorted to at some point. This time, however, it was different. Perhaps that is why he jumped into the middle of that unknown so freely. He simultaneously had nothing and everything to lose, and - at the very least - he had done one thing right in his life if things did go wrong. All he knew was that she was in his grasp, and that Munkustrap could not hold Macavity completely back from accomplishing what he arrived to do. That was enough for him – maybe he did do a bit of thinking then.

The aftermath of his impromptu pas de deux was a fair amount of pain and a familiar red colour once more on his mainly golden fur – a mixture of his and that actual red bastard. Truly a pity; he had looked his best for The Jellicle Ball, trying to smooth down his rougher edges and appearance – almost a new Cat, Bombalurina had teased, with a level of sincerity that Alonzo had not yet determined – and it did not last that long.

Nothing in life is permanent in the end. Everything eventually fades away.

Another part of the aftermath was a trip to The Healer’s Den to get patched up and sent on his way – he might even get a nice treat if he was a good Tom.

And there he sat, staring at the walls lined with vials filled with aromatic plants and liquids that reeked in too many off-putting ways if not well acquainted with them. The pungent odour was all a bit much for Alonzo, and he purposely avoided this den for that reason, but he did not have much of a choice at the moment.

Or did he.

With all the commotion of both the uninvited guest during the Ball and the Jellicle Choice afterwards, he might be able to sneak off. He was not important enough anyway to worry about, he thought to himself. Other Cats needed medical attention as well, and there were plenty of past times he had been hurt; left to grin and bear it without someone to care and ensure he did not make an injury worse.

As quiet as he could muster in spite of the pain, he rose from the bundle of blankets he was told to wait on and made his way towards one of the exits of the den. Everyone else there seemed preoccupied; he could see Coricopat and Tantomile preparing medicines through a slit in one of the curtains, Jennyanydots was in another one of the rooms looking after Munkustrap – he had bore the brunt of the fight with the Mystery Cat and likely needed an overnight stay - and Alonzo could overhear the younger Toms trying to compare injuries while simultaneously also touting how it was lucky for Macavity that they were not the ones to spar with one another – despite Carbucketty being thrown around like he was no more than a mouse. Only a few more turns and he would be free in the early dawn to find another place to rest, away from everyone else.

The touch of a paw on his back stopped him, and he knew exactly who it was without needing to turn around. He was caught by the one Queen he knew that he could not say no to, and she would be all business tonight.

“If it were not for you being injured, I would have scooped you up here and carried you back like a fussy Kitten!” said the familiar voice of Jellylorum.

Was there a hint of nervous fun in that declaration?

“You should be so lucky to have someone to look after you, let alone the four of us, and this is your thank you? Sneaking off without a word?” A biting tone creeped up as she continued.

Ouch, definitely not her cheery self then.

Turning to face his fate, Alonzo could not help but feel guilty as he saw Jellylorum's eyes.

How did she know I would try to leave? Was I for once not quiet enough?

He received the answer soon enough, as if she was already probing his flawed thought process as it happened inside his head, all without his need to speak.

“You should know by now that no one gets past me, Alonzo. I deal with the young ones everyday, and they are very quiet on their feet. I can hear everything when I am the one in charge of looking after them. I cannot afford to lose anyone around here,” she quipped. “And lest you think I am joking about carrying you around, remember who lifted Admetus on their back just last week!”

That was no exaggeration either. Despite her relatively smaller outward appearance, Jellylorum was as strong as a pack of Pollicles. She was also a stubborn one who never danced around a subject too long, a no-nonsense approach that Alonzo appreciated and admired. He knew exactly who Jellylorum took after, after having met Gus for the first time. A couple of firebrands that family is. He also knew that he was not going to be able to charm his way out. Not tonight at least; Jellylorum was busy enough. He was best to return to the blanket pile and not cause any more undue fuss.

Without a word of argument, Alonzo marched back to where he started, feeling the eyes of Jellylorum burn through his body as she escorted him.

She must think that I am so ungrateful.

Having a seat once more on the soft bedding, he again met the eyes of the Queen that he secretly regarded as a mother figure; he was never sure if she had caught on to the affinity he held for her, but was too proud to admit to. Instead of the expected anger he anticipated, Jellylorum looked saddened – a rarity for the stoic Cat that dealt with issues in a practical manner – which only added to his guilt. Still, he had nothing to say that would make the situation better, instead waiting for the verbal scolding that he rightfully deserved for being selfish at an inopportune time.

“Life is hard enough, Alonzo. You understand that possibly better than anyone here in the Tribe, and yet you are always the first to forego anyone helping you,” she started softly. “I appreciate your point of view that you can fend for yourself, but eventually you will need to come to the realization that some of us care for you – I care about you! And I do not think that I need to inform you that Demeter especially cares about you, as I am sure you do her! The poor thing will not stop asking how everyone is doing because she feels that this is all her fault.”

I know, I just feel bad about being a liability. You either are someone who finishes the job or someone who is finished off. There was no room for weakness in any form, in the past.

“You will not be doing anyone a favour if those wounds get infected and you lose a limb! I do not think that you want to force me to be a Protector at my age!”.

With the slightest of grins, she stopped momentarily to show off her physique in dramatic fashion, her cheery disposition shining through to dispel the rare unease between them.

“Although it did feel good to get a few swipes in on Macavity. I bet he did not anticipate me and Jenny giving him that departing gift. I do not need to show you that same treatment to keep you here, do I?”

With that playful threat, Alonzo finally spoke.

“Just let me say thank you before you do, alright?” he sheepishly began, “It is only fair after everything you have done for me. It is hard to admit that I need help. Not exactly what I am used to, being the one that is vulnerable or the one that needs to rely on another. I am lucky to have you. You should know that it truly means the world, even if I never say it."

"I will stay, if only for you.”

[5-7-9]

Bruce admires and envies Harvey because he’s the perfect embodiment of justice and a good life. Despite Harvey’s tragic past, he seemed to be moving on. That’s why Bruce could never let go of Harvey. He believed in Harvey.

The variations go multiple ways but Harvey appreciates Bruce’s unwilling support. In a world where his father didn’t believe in him, in a city where the system and its cogs don’t believe in him, having someone actually believe in you is a breath of fresh air. Not in theory or in concept, someone that knows you and validates you because you are you.

Harvey loves Gilda for being his anchor of peace in his life. When everything else goes to fire, Gilda is there through it all despite it all. She doesn’t care about all the chaos and dangers if it means being with Harvey. Harvey’s flaws don’t seem like a big dealbreaker even if Harvey thinks otherwise. Every problem seems inconsequential and answers seem so simple. If it means being happy, Harvey will gladly go with Gilda.

But despite my own likes of Harvey, I struggle in figuring out why Gilda would care for Harvey. It’s not like Bruce where they believe in the same cause, she’s a sculptor and mostly unbiased in the grand scheme of politics. What Harvey gives to Gilda is certainly not to the same levels of what she gives to Harvey. Not in my personalized opinion anyways. I get that Harvey has a bunch of mistakes he will own up to in his redemption, like actually being there spending time with Gilda without running away, and I’ll never see that because that’s his end. But was Harvey seriously worth all that stressing about??? There have been variations where Gilda just leaves Harvey for another man, and I can’t blame her. There’s something so simplistic about the way Gilda views Harvey’s “bad side” that could explain her easy humanization and complete disregard of having the same betrayal angst Bruce has. Maybe she just doesn’t see it as a betrayal, just a huge breaking point that Harvey needs to recover from. Whatever she saw in Harvey literally didn’t change her opinion of Harvey. “He’s just a little sick for a while, I hope he gets better soon.” It’s kinda incredible how her lack of political reason makes her choices. I’ve always found stories where characters disregard political reasoning to do what they think is right in their hearts very endearing. Society thinks there’s always a correct choice, but there are always exceptions. Society is made up of humans, not some statistical robot after all.

[pjs-art-cosmos]

Beloved - Blaze Family

“They’ve been calling me that for the last two weeks.” Drake sips his coffee, listening to his wife’s plight. She sighs, and sips her own tea.

Their table rattles as Hilbert slings against it, pulling up a chair with his own coffee.

“Wait, what? What’s the issue?” She taps her tea cup while he pours the entire bottle of creamer into his coffee. Drake gags, Jo only scoots closer.

“Beloved. They’ve been calling me that.”

“And who?” She stirs her tea, perplexed.

“Fox and Lori. They’re up to something, I know it.” She sips at her tea again, glaring at the tea ripples.

Drake and Hilbert glance at each other, before shaking their heads. “Those two never scheme though, Jo.”

“Uh, are you sure it’s not just a term of endearment?”

“What?” She stares at them crazy, as if they just revealed some outlandish information…. Have they used the word endearment around Jo before?

“Ah. Jo, it’s another nickname.” Drake chirps.

“Oh…” The cogs start turning as she stares at her tea. He elbows to stop his brother-in-arms from laughing.

“Are you sure Lori-“

“Beloved!~” Speaking of the mermaid, she skips over and squeezes her best friend. “How are you today?” Finishing with a peck on the cheek. Jo doesn’t respond, still processing this new yet vital information. “Jo?”

“Give her a second Lori.” He mutters to himself. “We need to get out more.”

Hilbert only smiles. “Nah, we’re perfect.”

The other deadpans. “No, we’re not.”

Lori shakes her head at the two. “Wait, Jo you didn’t know what beloved meant?“

“No…. It’s strange.”

“Well, it means that you’re someone special to me, and I am delighted when I spend time with you. I would love almost nothing more than be by your side, Jo.”She flashes her signature smile that could warm any heart. Her friend shivers.

“Ew.” She wants to spend more time with her? Really? All she does is do chores, care for her family, and occasionally look at rocks…. and build snow-globes. Other than that, why would anyone want to spend time with her? Is she that interesting? Or is there nothing else to do? Another mystery Lori gives her to think about.

However the mermaid shakes her head, grabbing one of her hands.

“Can’t I cherish you?” Tea goes down the wrong hole, leaving Jo a coughing mess.

“Wait, you think I’m going to die???” Her mind flickers to when Jake found an injured bird that was on the brink of death, Drake told him to simply “cherish it” before it passed away the next day.

“What?? No!”

“That’s not how that works, Jo.” Her husband sighs, pinching the brim of his nose. Hilbert hands her a napkin. “You can cherish people whenever, it’s not just imma die thing.” She wipes her mouth.

“Oh…..” Lori couldn’t help but smile again, Jo’s such an odd person. It’s like she could say ten new words to her just by chatting about her day. And yet, she isn’t judgmental in the slightest and willing to learn. It’s so earnest. She couldn’t contain her giggle.

“Don’t you love it when Jo learns something new?”

“Ehh…” Drake keeps sipping his coffee, but Hilbert laughs, nodding.

“Oh! What did she learn new???” Fox trots over, hearing the commotion. One at glance at a blank-stare Jo leads him to smirk playfully.

“It must be life-changing, I can see the cogs turning in her head.” His finger spins in a circle.

“Oh and good morning too you beloved.” Fox and Lori exchange peaks on cheeks, flashing smiles at each other. “Sorry I’m late.”

“Awww, no problem beloved. Good morning too!”

“Huh????” Wait Fox is a beloved too??? He can be?? This is too much, a headache starts to form as Jo rubs her temple. No amount of tea can fix this.

“You can cherish multiple people, hun.”

“I’m going to cut down a tree now.” She takes off, her too beloved friends trail after her, both shouting.

“We’ll come with you, beloved!”

It’s quieter now, but Drake could only sigh. Maybe Fox and Lori did have a ploy against his wife.

A ploy to cherish her, no matter if she understands it or not. He shakes his head, though Hilbert was cheesing, entertained to the fullest.

“Well then. What do you think about that, beloved?” He props his head up on his cheeks. His brother in arms sips the last of his coffee.

“That I love this family and you all lost your damn minds.” He squeezes his hand before drinking the rest of his own coffee.

“Awww cheer up, beloved.”

“Ew.” Drake gags, though is unsuccessful in hiding his smile.

[trisshawkeye]

Dear Good Omens fandom, let's talk about SPACE

Did you know that the number of star-forming nebulae (otherwise known as H II regions) in this galaxy alone, ignoring all of the other galaxies out there, is over 8000 at least? Of which we know that Crowley was involved in making at least three (the Pillars of Creation i.e the Eagle Nebula, the one he looked at in S1 i.e. Eta Carinae I believe, and the Horsehead Nebula)? The latter of which he worked closely with Saraqael, another angel, to make (as well as 'closely with upstairs' with the Pillars of Creation), so it wasn't like they were all solo projects?

Did you know that outside of star-forming regions, which seem to be Crowley's area of expertise, there are hundreds of billions of stars in the Milky Way alone (which in the GO-verse come 'pre-aged' and, from my own interpretation of how Crowley says it, are likely someone else's department)? One of which is our Sun, which Crowley definitely didn't seem to be involved in the creation of, given his ignorance of the big plans for that quadrant and its inhabitant 'people'?

And did you know that outside of our own galaxy, there are estimated to be hundreds of billions of galaxies, all of which I imagine do actually exist in the GO-verse given how Crowley talks about 'trillions of stars' being out there? Which, yeah, he might have some minor involvement in making, but given how much care, attention, and recognition he gives the individual nebulae he's been involved in creating, I'd consider this very unlikely.

Space is really, really, really, really, fucking big. No, far bigger than that. And I propose to you that Crowley being involved in making space stuff doesn't actually make him much more important than the almost certainly millions of other angels also working on making space stuff, and certainly not an archangel.

Someone taking that much joy and excitement and love in the creation of a single star-forming region in the grand scheme of the universe is no less a tiny cog in the giant machine of Heaven than Aziraphale is. And I'd have it no other way.

[merryfortune]

I'm In Love with the Other Woman

Written for the Rarest of Rare Pairs Fic-a-Thon

Prompt: Any/Any - femslash - 5 times she thought about kissing [the other woman] and the 1 time she did

Title: I’m In Love with the Other Woman

Ship: Celica/Faye

Fandom: Fire Emblem Shadows of Valentia

Rating: T

Warnings: None

Word Count: 3,488

Tags: Post-Canon, Established Alm/Celica, Past/Referenced Alm/Faye, Infidelity, Internalised Homophobia, Incompatible Orientations, Unhappy Ending

   If anyone was going to have an affair in this relationship, surely it would be Alm.

   Men were allowed much more leniency with how monogamy was understood, after all. Chastity only seemed important for those who were women. Men evaded all of that, somehow. Permitted harems, concubines, and mistresses. Alm even had easy access to someone who would throw away all virtue for him and yet… he was entirely uninterested.

   Celica, meanwhile, had begun to view that person in a different light. Faye.

   She was a close childhood friend to not only herself but Alm as well. She had played a pivotal role in Alm’s campaign with the Deliverance as a healer but was unafraid of taking up bow and arrow either. She was sweet and earnest and Celica adored her. She hadn’t realised how robbed she had been of Faye’s company until separation turned to reunion.

   There was something about Faye which caused Celica to much fascination as the hypothetical other woman. A rival to her affections for Alm but that’s not what it was at all. Celica’s fascination with Alm was not as someone who ought to be regarded with suspicion but entirely different.

   She was who Celica wanted to be with more and more. Beyond that of simple companionship and beloved friendship. She wanted to be with Faye more and more. She wanted to kiss her.

   That first thought of impulse reviled Celica. It came from nowhere. She was literally sitting next to her husband at this feast for old friends and yet, her eyes fixated on Faye’s cupid bow lips. She relished the song in her laughter and her brown eyes. She had mellowed out somewhat in the last couple years so far away from the war.

   That’s how Celica felt anyway as she observed Faye over dinner. She sat close to Alm and adjacent to herself at a fancy chair in the long table of the royal dining room. Her voice was quiet, underneath the loud thrum of everyone else as they celebrated the embarking of a new era: the second year of Alm and Celica’s marriage, the birth of a new country, and much, much more.

   Though marriage might be stretching it considering Celica could already feel herself growing cynical to the honeymoon phase as she considered Faye’s demeanour all too carefully. Everything from her table manners to how and what she ate, it was far more interesting to her than anything else no matter how people tried to converse with her.

   And so, where Alm was firmly committed, Celica could feel herself wandering astray from her marital vows of fidelity and chastity.

   She wasn’t sure why though. This was the life that she had been destined for. Born into the lap of luxury, thrust with great expectation upon her, she had burned brighter than the flames around her and could entrust herself, body and soul, to a husband whose fate was the other half of her own and yet…

   A simple farm girl, with dirty knees and fingers pricked from efforts at sewing gone awry, had begun to unravel all which fate had once spun for her on the thread of the universe. Oh, Faye… Celica’s heart broke for her and yet, it beat on.

   Faye came from nothing and despite her role in Alm’s army, she would be returning to nothing. It just didn’t seem fair. She was humble and hard working, a cog in the greater scheme which allowed food from the country into the plates of the palace and yet, her thanks would be to be forgotten by history. So, both Celica and Alm did their best but she knew her place.

   Her crush on Alm was plain as the nose on her face. She knew that she had lost that race and so seemed to have backed down of late, moved on from her feelings. It was admirable. Though the problem was that Celica hardly considered it a competition, especially now that the winners and losers and spectators shifted roles and positions. She married Alm, sure, and Faye was moving on but Celica was falling out of love with her kindred flame because that’s all it was.

   Fire. Scattering embers which dissipated in the void. It was quick and heated and not at all tamed for the dull and tedious. Alm was simply not that person. He didn’t have a head for politics despite a heart for the people. He was trying though. May the gods bless him because he was trying. Because the gods had to know that Celica wasn’t.

   She should be. She did have that head for politics but her heart was in it for one person and one person alone. That rogue thought of Faye, of kissing her, had been aberrant but it was not the only one.

   Swathed in malcontent after another trade negotiation which had gone as swimmingly as dropping a hammer in the ocean, Celica retired for the night in a private chamber. She knew Alm needed the alone time as well as her. She collected a blanket and swirled it around her like a shawl, she sat in a reading nook attached to a bay window and looked out over the gardens of the royal castle.

   She truly could not want for nothing and yet, her thoughts meandered back to that home she had known for only minutes: she thought of Ram Village. She recreated it vividly in her mind. The shambling stone walls, the smattering of houses, the beaten path that wound through it, and the orange trees that shaded it. She imagined it so well, she swore she could taste its pleasant air.

   But then she made the mistake of imagining someone there. Someone who was waiting for her in Ram Village. Not Gray or Tobin, not Kliff either but Faye. She thought of Faye and her family’s homestead that she was going to inherit as sole child of the household. 

   Celica imagined its insides. She never had been inside it but she was going to assume it had a cosy fireplace and a spinning wheel for weaving next to it. A comely kitchen that always smelt of baked goods and a little bed. She thought of Faye welcoming her in, taking her by the hand but not giving her a tour. This was theirs to own, theirs to honour, theirs to christen in after a honeymoon with… a kiss.

   Celica didn’t even begin to deny in her internal monologue this time that the thought was intrusive. The dress setting to her fantasy was far too thick and rich to pretend her story hadn’t been coordinated up to that point in time exactly. Even going so far as to imagine the sensation of Faye’s lips against her own.

   Just what was happening to her? A princess seduced by the idea of another woman. A commoner, no less. How gauche, surely. Yet this fantasy of a farmstead became her companion through many a dull night where she couldn’t sleep.

   Even next to Alm.

   Already, he seemed like such a legendary figure. Wrapped up in blankets and rumours, mythos which was grander than the man could ever be. He embodied all of them as he slept like the dead, feeling like a cold brickhouse beside Celica in their bed together.

   Despite his firm physique, the muscle and presence he exuded, lying next to Celica late at night, she felt as though he were hardly there. Maybe that was her fault. Maybe she was haunting him and that she was fit to slip away with the blink of an eye, becoming another shadow in the corner of their bedchambers rather than a source of warmth. 

   His wife. 

   Or heaven forbid, his trophy. Arm candy. 

   Her wistful gaze elsewhere even as she clung to his arm and allowed both himself and her to be paraded around the gala. Celica had already forgotten the occasion - Charity? An excuse to be pompous? To network with foreign dignitaries? - but she did know that it called for a ballgown and a gossamer raiment to be threaded around her arms.

   She looked into the sea of people and saw only strangers. She kept Alm out of her periphery for this reason. She tried to search for someone she knew, someone she could make small talk with and whom she did find, any hopes of actually chatting were dashed.

   They revealed themselves as the crowd ebbed and flowed. From a distance, Celica was initially uncertain but their matching blonde hair was unmistakable even from afar. 

   Clive and Mathilda… Oh, they were so darling. They were wearing matching outfits in navy blue. Together, in mind, body, and relationship they were so strong. Magnificent inside and out with kindred spirits of aflame with justice. Mathilda was with child now. Surely that meant people would begin to wonder when she and Alm were going to commit to such a role, to make heirs, even.

   Her heart ached with jealousy. She saw them kiss. Even here, in public, in the middle of the royal ballroom, they felt free to kiss so steamy. Lips pressed hard against one another. She and Alm hadn’t kissed like that in months and yet here they were, these two lovebirds were doing it as naturally as breathing.

   Though there was someone whom Celica thought she might like to kiss like that. She shouldn’t think such things, however, but when she closed her eyes, looked away, not wanting to be caught staring at Clive and Mathilda, she still thought of that other woman.

   Faye…

   What would she be like here? Would she enjoy it or was she more introverted? Celica felt like she hardly knew her hypothetical lover since she didn’t know the answers to these questions. Her childhood companion was just that. Left in past even though their encounters in the present had been charming enough, there was more to dig deep into this relationship but she really shouldn’t.

   It occurred to Celica, she was just like her father in this way. Her vice was what she could not have beyond the marital bonds. At least she only looked and never touched. Though, she was a fool to think that she was being discreet about her affections for someone who was not husband.

   “Is everything okay, Celica?” Alm asked.

   Oh, here we go. Celica immediately fired up, irate, ready to chew him out. They had been going on like this for months and he waits until the royal night of nights to bring it up? Ridiculous.

   The gala had long since come to a close, it was well past midnight. They were the only ones to remain as this was their home. As icy and frigid as it was.

   Celica huffed and wrapped her raiment around her tighter so it was more akin to a shawl than a flowing piece of silk. 

   “Celica.” Alm demanded of her.

   Their budding argument was about to take place against the inky night behind them at the balcony where they perched with leftover wine and champagne and the empty hall of glittering, white-and-blue tiles. His face was concerned but there were no lights behind his eyes. He was going through the motions of husbandry as much as Celica was going through the parallel of it with wifehood. 

   “I’m worried about you.” Alm insisted. “You’ve been acting weird. Have I done something wrong? You’ve been really distant. I-I know we both have a lot on our plate right now. We’re both new to this whole being king and queen thing but I can’t help but think it's more than that.” 

   His voice cracked and Celica’s heart dropped. He came to the wrong conclusion but that was more than enough to stab Celica in the heart. He licked his lips guiltily and made useless hand gestures which amounted to nothing of substance.

   “I saw you, looking at Clive and Mathilda…” Alm said. “Are you… are you jealous? Do you want a baby or something? I know we’re not super active anymore but I thought it was because you were too stressed.”

   “No, Alm. That’s not the problem.” Celica interrupted.

   “Then what is? Please, tell me.” Alm said and he took her hand.

   He was so sincere. Earnest to a fault. It made Celica sick. Sick with herself. 

   Alm gently encased her small hand inside his own. He brought Celica’s hand closer to him and he kissed her delicate knuckles. He closed his eyes and he silently begged for forgiveness, prayed for Celica’s mood to improve but all it did was worsen it. The tempest of Celica’s contradictory emotions raged inside of her and at the eye of such a storm was the cause. The calm. The other woman.

   She wished, ever so fleetingly, that it was Faye kissing her hand.

   Celica quashed such a thought. What a nasty, two faced thought to have about her kind, loving husband. To be thinking of another woman, of someone else entirely for that matter, when he was affirming his commitment to her. Celica looked away and her facade cracked. She shed a tear.

   “I’m sorry, Alm. I cannot tell you simply.” she murmured. “I am lost in my thoughts. I could not begin to tell you for they are so strange and  tangled.”

   Not a lie. That was not a lie, Celica told herself. But it wasn’t the truth either.

   Alm’s eyes fluttered open and with all the misguided good intentions in the world, he replied, “I understand. Take your time.”

   He, truly, did not deserve someone so duplicitous. Someone who so regularly contemplated infidelity. And someone who would commit said infidelity in a heartbeat.

   Celica tried to assuage her conscience that fantasy was not planning. That thinking about something was not the same as doing it. Especially since her contemplation of such activities - running away, kissing, and more - were entirely contained within the vessel of unrealistic yearning. That it was simply incompatible with reality on account of her infidel headspace being so unrealistically charming and homely farmstead but as soon as she saw Faye again, she felt a throb inside herself.

   It had been a year now since their last meal together.

   Alm wanted to make it an annual thing, a banquet to commemorate the tenure of all the different folks and soldiers who had made up the Deliverance army. Yet their company was so gossamer thin despite the bonds of war. They had hardly been in contact with any of these people after the dust had settled. Lukas and Python and Forsyth or Saber and Genny and Atlas. Least of all Faye and the rest of their friends from Ram Village and yet.

   Once they gathered, the ice melted and it was as though mere hours had elapsed since they had seen each other last. It was nice. Comforting, even. They ate, drank, and made merry amongst themselves in the dining hall. Courses of food never seemed to ease up, entrees and mains and desserts all mixed amongst one another with free flowing wine and other nectars. It was hearty and hedonistic.

   Which is why it might have gotten to Celica’s head. It was the first time in a long time where she felt mirth inside her veins, the blood got pumping and for all the wrong reasons. 

��  She hung onto every strand of conversation that Faye was apart of desperately. She was spoken over so frequently, her input usually little as with more men at the table, they discussed more men’s business than not but even so. Faye tried to have her voice heard and Celica tried to hear her.

   Celica wanted to get to know her more. Probe her for how her life was going after the war and if she had found her peace and prosperity. Celica was all but manic as she tried to befriend Faye harder than she ever had before because she needed to know.

   Did Faye match her daydream or was she merely in love with an overwhelming urge to run away?

   Either way, Celica got the answers to both when Faye decided she needed a breath of fresh air and since the grounds were so large, even the cloistered gardens poised hidden threats when unguarded, she needed an escort. Celica volunteered all too quickly and so, they were farewelled by the main crowd of the party - and including Alm. He waved them a short goodbye and looked forward to their return ten, twenty, maybe thirty minutes later.

   Faye was awkward as she walked side by side with Celica. Neither woman could recall a time they had actually been one-on-one with each other and so, the atmosphere was as cold as the night air between them. A frosty breeze blew through the gardens, rustling the camellias and evergreen plants that made up the elaborate courtyard. Together, shoulder to shoulder, sneaking glances at one another, they ventured further into the labyrinthian depths of the maze, attempting to make small talk.

   Celica could hardly hear Faye over her thoughts. Faye was going through the calendar, giving Celica the low down on the various crops her and her family were raising at the moment. Or so she thought. She wasn’t listening when all she could hear was her blood drone in her ear.

   Oh, Faye was so cute. Oh, Faye was so hard-working. Oh, Faye was so kissable. The thoughts burned on Celica’s lips.

   “We’ve made it.” Celica announced out of nowhere.

   “So we have.” Faye replied, blinking.

   They rested themselves on a stone bench underneath a gazebo at the centre of the royal maze. Being a fairy tale aficionado, what was a castle without its gazebo hidden in a maze? That’s what Faye joked anyway or tried to. She fidgeted with her fingers.

   “I-I’m glad we’re friends, Celica.” Faye said. “It’s nice.”

   “I’m glad as well.” Celica replied and her mouth dried. Her heart hammered. She didn’t want to be just friends.

   They had all the privacy in the world. They were surrounded by flowers and shrubbery. There was nothing more romantic than a gazebo on a moonlit night. Celica lost her head and so, she swooped on Faye and kissed her, unable to resist her thoughts.

   She kissed Faye and Faye stiffened at the sensation. She could practically taste Celica’s desperation on her breath and she hated it and yet, for Celica, it was everything she dreamed and more. Faye’s lips were soft and supple, she tasted of their joyous meal they had shared at dinner. 

   “Cel-Celica.”

   “Yes?”

   “What are you doing?”

   Faye’s words vibrated on Celica’s lips but her tone of voice… It tugged on Celica’s heartstrings. She sounded scared. Frozen.

   “I-I’m kissing you.”

   “You’re married.”

   Was she though? She hadn’t kissed Alm in months at this point. She was too caught up in her private life inside her head wherein Faye was her heroine of heroines. She tried to kiss harder, she believed deeply against the grain of reality that if she kissed harder, Faye would kiss back.

   “We are both women.”

   “That doesn’t matter to me.”

   That was the nail in the coffin though. Faye recovered from her initial shock and she melted into disgust. She ripped away from Celica and her expression gnarled. Her eyes burned, reviled with Celica’s inappropriate behaviour.

   “I have a boyfriend.” Faye snarled.

   “I-I didn’t know.” Celica replied and she began to break down.

   She hunkered over, hid her face and began to cry. Her heart had stopped in its break. She apologised through tears and reluctantly, Faye patted her shoulder.

   “He’s from another village, he’s tall and burly and makes me laugh.” Faye explained gingerly.

   “He… He sounds lovely, Faye.” Celica said through hiccuping sobs.

   This was humiliating yet illuminating. Her crush had blinded her to reality and what was left of it? The silver lining? The opulence and luxury of being a Queen, she had to be the iron fist inside of a velvet glove, guiding a country forward yet here she was, as a person, brought low by her own stupidity. The idealisation was, well, there was a reason why Faye couldn’t look at her directly and it was not because she thought Celica was pathetic. No, it was all too familiar to her. The proof was in the quiver of her lips. 

   “I-I hope whatever you and Alm are going through… you are able to do something about it. Fix it.” Faye told her.

   Celica heaved. The sob came from the bottom of her throat. Faye, of all people, did not need to comfort her and wish the best for her in her relationship with Alm but she did anyway. That spoke volumes to her kind heart inside her chest but Celica agonised all the more.

   She had no idea how to start over with Alm even now it could not be more than apparent that it was over with even the idea of Faye. 

[froyocorps]

talking abt the cog ocs i posted today bc aughhhuu (<- has excitment that cannot be contained) putting it under the cut bc its long but heres the basic run downs of em all bc i never said anything abt em

baggage handler aka porter shes like my Main cog oc ig. she runs a hotel called the cutting suite floor in acorn acres and shes both the head of vacations for the company and their budget therapist. Therapy includes her going "awe :( that sucks. heres a free check in for a relaxing day at our hotel ^_^ Can you get back to work now" she is ALSO shipped with erclaim bc im a loser and i think he just stays in her hotel "haunting" it after being fired. she loves his pathetic swag

the bellhop boys aka moe larry and curtis are all walking stooges references. theres not much more to them theyre like porters very own satellite investors and they all annoy porter very much

goldbricker aka riley is a liar !!! scammer !!!!!!! his storyline is that he steals jellybeans from the toon bank and is trying to sell them back to toons at a higher price, as well as selling them to cogs as they are valuable (to toons. Not to cogs.) hes trying to run a ponzi scheme but no ones buying it rlly. hes also got the midas touch thing going on i legit think he actually can turn anything into gold bars so any attack he'd hold an item with, the model is golden & the attack is buffed

crown prosecutor aka princess marilyn no im not typing out her full name Shes just based on mary sue culture but i mean it so lovingly. shes a cog princess from "suitsor" and shes probably definitely 100% british. shes like a glorified name dropper as in she knows every manager somehow from past work or past schooling. she rolls her R's also shes so himedere so queen deltarune coded

aaand copyeditor aka tina shes so small so tiny so cutes. its one of them its/hers, has a cane, and is mute but in a cog way - her gimmick is she wouldn't have her own sfx! if shes speaking dialogue, its other cog's sfx and dialogue (eg., it would do an attack but say a holly voiceline - "oh looketh, a burnt boor" - and then next attack do a dave voiceline - "better not dance cold on my floor") she could probably stitch together voicelines like a tf2 old sfm. i cant pin down in my head if she hates toons or is neutral about them, as it never gives opinion unless it can parrot what someone else thinks that she agrees with at that moment, so i think its funny to think no one knows how well she performs bc shes so quiet

[maxschulz]

❛❛ 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐈𝐒 𝐇𝐄𝐋𝐋'𝐒 𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘 , and I'm beholden to no gods. You kneel before my throne unaware that it was born from lies. –––––––––––––

BIRTH NAME. Maximus Alexander Rothschild

CURRENT ALIAS. Max Schulz

NICKNAMES. Max

GENDER & PRONOUNS. Cismale + he/him

AGE. Thirty 6

RESIDENTIAL AREA. Saugatuck

OCCUPATION. Conman parading around as a Fisherman

LENGTH OF TIME IN WESTPORT. One Month

ABOUT | CONNECTIONS |  PINTEREST

STATS ––

BIRTHDAY. March 28, 1988

ZODIAC SIGN. Aries

PLACE OF BIRTH. Tbd

SEXUAL ORIENTATION. Heterosexual

RELATIONSHIP STATUS. Single

FAMILY ––

MOTHER'S NAME.Selina Roth

FATHER'S NAME. Victor Roth

SISTER'S ALIAS. Daphne Schulz

BROTHER'S ALIAS. Cole Roth

CHILDREN. none

PERSONALITY TRAITS ––

MBTI. Entj

MORAL ALIGNMENT. Lawful Evil

ENNEAGRAM. Type 8

SKILLS & ASSETS ––

Charm & Persuasion: Max is excellent at talking people into things, whether it’s persuading them to invest in a “business venture” or simply manipulating them into doing what he wants.

Quick Thinker: He can think on his feet and come up with solutions (or lies) on the fly, a skill he developed during years of running cons.

Disguise & Deception: Although he's trying to live a more "honest" life, Max is still very capable of putting on different personas and assuming new identities when needed.

Stealth: Years of avoiding his family’s prying eyes and law enforcement have made him adept at slipping in and out of places unnoticed.

TLDR ––

Maximus "Max" Schulz comes from a long line of con artists, grifters, and swindlers who have perfected the art of deception for generations. His family made their fortune by taking advantage of the naïve, the trusting, and the unsuspecting, with a knack for long cons and scams that often left people with nothing but empty pockets and shattered dreams.

Raised in the shadows of the con world, Max never had a chance at a normal life. From the age of six, he was taught the art of the grift — how to lie, steal, manipulate, and play on people's emotions.

His parents pushed him into these schemes, using him as both a tool and a pawn in their elaborate scams. They saw him as nothing more than a future asset to their operations, a cog in the machine of their criminal empire.

Over time, however, Max grew weary of the constant hustle and lies, and eventually, he developed a deep resentment toward his parents for forcing him into a life of deception.

He hated being controlled, and the very thing that once seemed like a thrill now felt like a prison. By the time he reached adulthood, he had begun to rebel against his family's expectations, finding ways to break free from their grip — even though the family continued to pull him back in with promises of wealth, power, and status.

Tired of the constant manipulation, Max has finally cut ties with his parents and moved away from the bustling cities where his family had done their work to follow his younger sister, who did the same but for different reasons.

Westport stands as a small, quiet town, far from the life he once knew. The town's slow pace and tight-knit community offer him a sense of freedom he's never experienced before, but he can't quite shake his instincts.

The skills he's honed over the years still remain sharp, and while he tries to live an honest life per his sister's "rules", the temptation to pull a few small scams are always there, lingering in the back of his mind.

However, living in Westport is a double-edged sword. While the people are more trusting, they’re also quick to notice anything out of the ordinary. Max has had to learn how to lay low, blending in with the locals while keeping his past a secret.

Deep down, he struggles with his identity — is he the man his parents forced him to become, or can he be someone else?

BIOGRAPHY ––

Maximus "Max" Schulz (born Rothschild but shortened to Roth) is the sort of devil that will disguise himself as a God. He will appear in one's life like an angel, make them feel as though they're in heaven while he's with them but in reality, he is hell dressed in leather and branded in tattoos. Much of Max's life has been saturated in lies, suffused in crime and ruled over by deceit. He didn't ask to be born into a family of con artists but, it's the hand he's been dealt regardless. And he's mastered the art of playing Chess with his victims all too well, while the rest of the word is steadily playing checkers all around him.

Nobody really knows who he is or where he comes from outside of the "Six Spiders". A group of conniving misfits hellbent on doing jobs their families have forced them into without getting caught. To the rest of the world, he presents himself as whoever they need him to be in order to expand his bank account. There isn't a job he wouldn't do for the sake of the beloved others. But more specifically, for his sister whom he's followed to Westport after she tried to get away from the life they have lead to start a new one without telling anyone. Had he any say as to where they went next, it wouldn't be some small town in Connecticut with nothing to do and no rewards to gain.

Unfortunately, his over-protective nature won't allow him to stay away from those he loves for too long. Which includes not only his blood relative but, the few others that he considers 'family', and the one girl he claims not to love despite how deeply she's burrowed herself under his skin. Sey's the one thing he can't have and he's not supposed to want. Not only is their love doomed to fail, some would say it's forbidden altogether. That being with her, his younger sister's best friend, would be a blatant act of betrayal. It would be like a con falling for his con. Shit like that doesn't happen where he comes from. Least of all not to someone like Max, who swears off relationships and romanticism and wouldn't know what either were even if they smacked him dead across the face. Does he care to build a life here? Not really. Is it impossible? No. As they always say, nothing's impossible.

PERSONALITY ––

Apollo is a charming, charismatic individual, with an easy smile and a way with words that make him incredibly persuasive. It's how he was coined the "silver tongue" of their group. He's used to getting what he wants through manipulation, but he’s also smart enough to know that in a small town, people value trust and loyalty above all else. As a result, he’s learned to hold back some of his more con-artist tendencies, though they still flare up when the opportunity presents itself. He has a deep distrust of authority and figures of power — especially his parents — and is very protective of his independence. Max is also deeply conflicted; while he resents his family's life of deception and control, he can't fully shake the skills they've instilled in him, nor the part of him that craves the thrill of the con.

Despite his moral grayness, Max has a soft spot for those who are vulnerable or overlooked, as he knows all too well what it’s like to be exploited. He often feels like an outsider, unsure if he’ll ever truly belong, but he’s determined to make a life for himself, even if it means making difficult choices along the way.

HEADCANONS ––

He's trained in Krav Maga

He has a High IQ and something called Hyperthymesia (People with hyperthymesia can recall almost every day of their lives in near perfect detail, as well as public events that are personally significant. Those affected describe their memories as uncontrollable associations, so when they come across a date, they "see" a vivid depiction of that day in their heads.)

His experiences doing cons over the years have helped to hone his instincts, making him adept at reading people and situations, which serves him well in his pursuit of the job.

He's in Westport because he tracked his sister and her best friend there. He knows something's up and is determined to get to the bottom of it. At whatever cost necessary.

He has this irrational fear of being alone but at the same time, treasures his quiet time and can't stand people who overstay their welcome or constantly invade his personal space (and privacy).

He once had a pet pigeon as a child that was killed by the neighborhood cat. Because of this he hates all cats now lol.

He respects honesty and has no patience for liars or injustices even though he's guilty of doing both himself. (It's giving ✨ I can do this but you can't ✨ energy)

Hasn't told anyone why he didn't show for the job that ultimately scared his little sister away out of fear of the truth coming to light and him having to face the consequences of his negligent actions. Oop.

[sortyourlifeoutmate]

Like, I am aware that we are all at the mercy of the cruel, iron cogs of The Economy and I am aware that, for The Economy to crush us less (not stop crushing us, crush us less) we need this vaunted 'growth' we all hear so much about and I am equally aware that in order to foster this 'growth' what is required is basically a supine, submissive, prostrate position before those who already have all the money. I'm aware of that.

It's just that I don't like it. I don't like that, in order for our life here in the Space Future to suck less we have to create an environment where the worst people - people you would shoot yourself in the head before getting stuck in a lift with - need to be placated by having the world turned into a playground where they can exploit everyone to the fullest without consequence.

Where every venture isn't what it appears to be, but is instead a vessel for speculation and making a return. Houses are not for living in, they are for selling to someone else to sell to someone else to lease to someone who'll then rent them out and the whole thing is part of some greater scheme to make the numbers go up. And every step along the way is also part of its own scheme to make more numbers go up. That people live in houses is neither here nor there. That's not the point. Housing is a solid return.

Or whatever, I don't know. I'm not an expert. I'm just pretty confident that the people with the greatest say in how things should go are the same people who should be far, far, far away from anything important. And also far away from us. Maybe just in the sea.

Oh I'm creating jobs blah I'm an employer growth blah blah WELL DO IT BETTER, CUNT. Get paid less!

Remember when P&O Ferries dismissed all those people so they could hire cheaper people? And it was illegal? And they did it anyway? And...that was it, basically? Oh well?

What a fucking time to be alive!

[cynicalalpaca]

Okay okay I've been thinking more because I have permanent homestuck brain poisoning. Here's lunar sway, Lands and some of their quests. And a bonus at the bottom

Astarion is a Derse dreamer. If he's romanced and remains a spawn, he switches to a Rogue of Blood, stealing bonds (and blood) for others instead of himself. His Land is tentatively the Land of Chains and Arteries. I could see Cazador being his denizen, but I'm not fully sold on that idea. Don't know what else his denizen could be though

Shadowheart is a Derse dreamer. She's tentatively on the Land of Night and Spirit with Shar as the denizen. The spirits are fragments of her previous identity and memories, she has to both realize that (she thinks they're hostile at first) and then use them to banish the black, shadowed night that Shar has covered the Land in, bringing moonlight

Gale is a Prospit dreamer. If he becomes a professor- romanced or otherwise- he switches to a Seer of Light, using his knowledge to guide and educate students. Land of Myth and (something. Glow?Revelation?) with denizen Mystra. His quest involves searching for clues of ancient myths the consorts speak of and discovering the truth behind them, bringing knowledge to the consorts

Lae'zel is a Derse dreamer in the Land of Oath and Dragons with Vlaakith as the denizen. Someone on reddit also suggested that she could be a Knight of Space, as her story line has her growing to see the big picture rather than just being the cog she starts as. I especially like this because if Tav/Durge is a Time player, it creates a valid session. If this is the case, she's in the Land of Frogs and Dragons

Karlach is a Prospit dreamer in the Land of Flame and Release with Zariel as the denizen. The consorts and underlings are at war and Karlach has to help the consorts win, teaching them to release their pent up rage in the battles. She also learns to allow herself to feel negative emotions, rather than hiding them away (my interpretation of her character)

Wyll is a Prospit dreamer in the Land of Contracts and Souls with Mizora as the denizen. The consorts have all entered convoluted contracts with the denizen for protection (and so has Wyll, as soon as he steps onto the planet he's forced to sign one) and he has to save their souls by finding the loopholes in his own contract, which lets him void all the others as well, bringing Hope and freedom to the consorts for the first time since the denizen appeared. Also he has a bunch of side quests defending consort villages from monsters, some of them given directly by the denizen

Minthara is a Derse dreamer in the Land of Betrayal and Spires. I imagine a land full of tower of scheming consorts all trying to be the strongest, the most feared, the most politically powerful (they aren't very good at it compared to the Drow, but they try). Minthara has to 1) learn that scheming and backstabbing is bad and 2) stop the consorts trying to overthrow the denizen. Maybe Lolth is the denizen? I'm not sure

Halsin is a Prospit dreamer in the Land of Vines and Bars, a forested planet filled with jails he has to free the consorts from. Again from reddit, it was suggested to make his Title more reflective of the Shadow Curse. I would make him a Bard of Void in the Land of Shadows and Bloom. Bard because he allows the player to destroy the Shadow Curse, and Void because the Shadow Curse is largely associated with Shar (who is absolutely a Muse of Void). His quest on LOSAB would be similar to Shadowheart's on LONAS, banishing a curse from the denizen and bringing light to the Land

Jaheira is a Prospit dreamer in the Land of Growth and Memory. I struggle with Jaheira a bit because I've only played BG3, so if someone has a better idea, comment it

Minsc is a Prospit dreamer in the Land of Trust and Justice. Again, open to suggestions here bc I don't know Minsc super well.

Boo, if we're seeing him as his own character, is a Derse dreamer in the Land of Judgement and Destruction. I don't know what could possibly be a denizen for Boo, as what could possibly scare him?

AND WHAT KIND OF HOMESTUCK POST WOULD THIS BE WITHOUT QUADRANTS?!

Astarion

Gale

Karlach

Wyll

Shadowheart

Lae'zel

Minsc

Jaheira (also Boo. He has two moirails)

I should post this here too, shouldn't I?

Explanations under the cut

Astarion: Thief of Blood.  Along with the obvious fact that he steals literal blood, his initial plan is to manipulate the player into liking him, “stealing” a bond with them for his protection.  And that was basically his m.o. for 200 years.  If he Ascends, he would turn into a Lord of Blood

Shadowheart: Maid of Heart.  I imagine that she’s spent most of her life inverted as a Bard of Mind, allowing her mind to be destroyed by the Sharrans.  The Maid of Heart is, well, made of their own identity.  It’s a creation class, and Shart is spending the rest of her life creating herself.  If she became a Dark Justiciar, she would remain a Bard of Mind

Gale: Mage of Light.  The active understanding class and the knowledge aspect fit the resident nerd of the group, don’t you think?  He’s probably the smartest party member (in terms of academic/theoretic knowledge) and uses that knowledge to power his magic.  In addition, Light is associated with relevancy and acknowledgement and boy oh boy was he desperate for Mystra’s.  If he becomes the God of Ambition, he would turn into a Lord of Light

Lae’zel: Prince of Breath.  I know the general understanding of Prince is that they destroy the aspect, but I understand them as also being able to destroy through use of their aspect.  Lae’zel is destroying Vlaakith’s empire by freeing the githyanki people and leading a revolution.  Maybe a bit of a stretch, but I was trying to avoid overlap for the origin characters.  I could also see her as a Knight or Prince of Blood

Karlach: Knight of Rage.  She’s a berserker, she fights by utilizing rage.  And the popular idea that Knights start out lacking in their aspect is pretty apt too, she’s an extremely positive person while Rage is all about more negative emotions.  I think she might ghost her inverted class- Rogue of Hope- but never fully inverts, just toys with distributing hope and positivity.

Wyll: Heir of Hope.  I fully admit Wyll kinda got the short end of the stick as he was the last character I did, but I do think it fits.  Heirs passively manipulate or inspire their aspect in others, and Wyll fights for the people as the Blade of Frontiers, inspiring Hope in those he protects.  I could also see him as a Blood aspect, as so much of his story deals with his bonds- to his father, Mizora, Baldur’s Gate and the people of the Coast

Minthara: Maid of Doom.  This is where I stopped caring about overlap lol.  Minthara is your most “evil” companion and one who approves of killing people in your way.  Doom was a pretty clear choice for her, being the Aspect of death, but also dealing with systems and authority, like the Cult of the Absolute and her place in its hierarchy.  As for her class, Maids create their aspect and make it a core part of themselves.  Minthara has been surrounded by death and hierarchies her whole life, having been born to a high ranking noble house in Menzoberranzan, leading to them being a very core part of her being.  I can also see her vacillating wildly between Maid of Doom and her inverse, Bard of Life, because she’s just that chaotic.  They both deal with death, but the Bard is a bit more passive about it, allowing others (the Cult, the player) to take lead on the killing

Halsin: Knight of Breath.  Again running with the “Knights lack their Aspect” theory, Halsin starts the game lacking the freedom he desires.  He’s literally imprisoned by the goblins, but he’s also constrained by his role as Archdruid, almost toying with his inverse of Rogue of Blood.  He craves the freedom of nature and jumps at the opportunity to gain it.  You could also argue wildshape is a form of freedom (both of form and of self) that he uses to fight.  There’s also his talk of polyamory and how he doesn’t want to be tied down.  Freedom is a recurring thing with the guy

Jaheira: Witch of Life.  Life is a pretty clear choice for a druid, as Life deals with flora and fauna.  Witch is the active manipulation class, and Jaheira is introduced manipulating plants to hold the player.  Additionally, she’s shown nurturing life by caring for various children in Baldur’s Gate, sorta like how Feferi took care of various marine animals

Minsc: Knight of Hope.  Okay this was the hardest one for me because I don’t fully get Minsc.  I’ve only played BG3, I don’t know him from any other games or comics or whatever.  But from what I do know, he was obviously one of the more offensive and active classes and Knight seems to fit him best.  He utilizes Hope- usually in the form of others’ trust in him- to fight.  Without that trust, he wouldn’t be as effective, he always fights best with his companions.  He’s also just a happy, up-beat guy, and Hope is largely focused on positive emotions

Boo: Lord of Doom.  BOO DECIDES THE FATE OF ALL.  HE HAS ULTIMATE SAY OVER LIFE AND DEATH

[sublime-beyond-loss]

Narrator Ambience/ASMR For All Of Your Narration Needs

I got a request to make some Narrator ASMR using the ambiance videos I've been pulling from the game, and at first I thought the idea would not pan out, and I'm still not sure if it did, but here are the results.

At first I didn't know what to use because the dude is at an 11 for like 99% of his dialogue and that would not make for good ASMR. So then I thought I'd go with the bucket endings, but even if the narrator isn't personally insulting you and your entire bloodline in (most) of the bucket endings, these endings still get batshit insane at times and thus still would not make for good ASMR. So I eventually settled on repeated loops of the main story line with several minor variations that are already present in the game, since I figured if a certain somebody was going to do ASMR, he'd want to read his damn story like it's a meditative gift from god.

Since I usually go into these trying to capture an eerie/haunting vibe, something which I find soothing and nice to put on in the background but a lot of people do not, I did my best to dial it back a bit for this project and hopefully made something genuinely nice to listen to.

While I was putting this together, I couldn't help but wonder how and why it is that some people take comfort (myself included) in this game that, when you get past all of the jokes and sillier moments, it is innately hostile toward the one playing it. I can only speak for myself, but as someone whose entire personality can largely be summed up as 'Ongoing Existential Crisis', I think it's the fact that the game doesn't shy away from the existential questions it poses, and in a way acts as a medium to confront these questions in a society that demands we act like we are okay at all times or face repercussions, and where you are not allowed to ask big questions about this insane reality we inhabit outside of approved religious constructs. There is comfort to be found in that.

And I think one of the most interesting aspects of this game is that the deeper you dive, you only find more questions with very few answers, because the game refuses to give up anything to the likes of you, and this over time causes the freedom ending to go from an unfulfilling, hypocritical story to something surprisingly meaningful. Sadly, there is no grand storyteller coming to narrate us an escape from this clown car of a society before it smashes into a wall, but it's a nice sentiment to think that Stanley can be happy. That is what I tried to capture in this ASMR project.

But of course, even the narrator thinks he's just a temporarily embarrassed millionaire, when he really is nothing more than another cog in the workings of this perpetual motion machine. I think if he were capable of understanding that, maybe he would not have erased Stanley's co-workers and instead created a narrative of collective empowerment. Maybe it would have given them a fighting chance against something so much bigger than any one of them, but this game will always remain a reflection of real life, where everyone thinks they are the main character of their own story, at the expense of everybody else. Maybe I can't help but project my own ideals upon it out of the hope that a destructive loop can be broken, because the way I see it, if nothing matters and all of our actions are meaningless in the grand scheme of things, giving up and not caring is the easiest thing in the world, but, if nothing truly matters, then it is a radical act to care about the well-being of your fellow humans on this tiny, blue dot in a vast, infinite universe.

Sure, it can be said that everything is predetermined, but something that everybody misses about the confusion ending is that, even if he doesn't remember it, the narrator did break the cycle by refusing to reset. The rest of the confusion ending does not play out. The stalemate he creates forces the game into a hard reset to keep the status quo going. He may have more power than it seems. Even Stanley has more power over the cycle than what it seems at face value, considering that he too has the power to reset at literally any point within the game, and of course, he can shut it all down at a push of a button. Maybe shutting the game off is a breaking of the cycle, or maybe shutting it down is the system getting a last laugh and saying that if you end it, it will take everyone and everything along with it. If TSP has taught me anything it's that I don't know anything and can only rely upon my own interpretations. So, hey. Who can say that within these infinite repetitions and infinite instances of these characters that there isn't a loop where the narrator figured some shit out and instead of using his position in the hierarchic to blow Stanley up in petty displays of power the second his position in the system is questioned, maybe he instead helps Stanley and his co-workers seize the means of the parable. Maybe the system is too powerful to bring down, maybe it can't be taken down without it self-destructing and taking everyone with it, or maybe it can always reset everything back to a baseline and halt any progress made, or maybe there is a loop out there where everything works out for the better. Who can say.

….Thank you for coming to my TED Talk about how we as a species need a Comrade Parable. (lolololol, you came here for narrator ASMR and got a commie reading of TSP too)