#actually saved someone’s life last night forreal

[twinsfawn]

𖤐

[spider-manholland]

Wrong Person | Peter Parker

Pairing(s): brief Peter Parker x Female Reader, Peter Parker x Michelle Jones

Warning(s): angst, whole lotta sadness, implications of rape, torture, murder, small hints of fluff, major Far From Home spoilers

Summary: Peter Parker’s biggest secret was out to the world and now, it was his job to protect the people he cared for most in the world against the many others that targeted who he loved, both platonically and romantically. But he will soon then learn that he was protecting the wrong person all along.

Author’s Note: I was forreal tearing up when writing this one-shot. I changed the way Peter found out about his secret of being Spider-Man was released to fit this one-shot. Hope you guys enjoy this heartache.

Masterlist

You knew your chances with Peter were over the moment you saw his lips meet MJ’s on top of the London Bridge, feeling your heartbreak at the sight of his wide smile that formed on his face when he pulled away.

You wanted to be angry. You wanted to hate MJ for taking your chance with him away but you couldn’t. She was perfect for him. She was everything you weren’t. Incredibly beautiful, insanely smart and just—perfect. You also wanted to be mad at Peter for not taking the your hints on how you feel about him but you couldn’t. You knew after everything he went through on this trip he deserved happiness and if he was happy, you were okay.

But sadly his happiness didn’t last long.

- - -

“-oh I just can’t wait be king!” You sang along cheerfully as you and Peter watched The Lion King in your room, the half-eaten bowl of popcorn resting on your lap.

“I still can’t believe no matter how many times you’ve watched this you still react like this is the first time.” Peter laughed as you sang loudly, a bright smile on your lips as your tore your eyes away from the television to face him. “Hey,” you scoffed playfully, “You don’t seem me complaining whenever we watch Star Wars over and over again. This week is my turn to choose the movie so deal with it.”

“Alright, touché.” Peter nodded, nudging your shoulder as the both of you laughed. You couldn’t help but feel your heart flutter at the sound of his laugh, sparks erupting in your chest at the sudden touch from him. It’s only been a week since you both came back from your disastrous trip in Europe and this was the first time you two actually got to spend time together...alone. There was part of you that still wanted to tell Peter how you like him, mentally telling you that if you don’t confess to him it’ll eat you up for the rest of your life. But the other part of you was telling you not to say anything, that if you do it’ll only cause problems because he was with MJ and he was happy, and you confessing your feelings to him won’t change anything.

“So how are you and MJ?” You suddenly asked, hoping that hearing him talk about his relationship, seeing up close on how happy he is would help you decide on what to do. “Oh, we’re doing great.” Peter smiled, his mind wandering towards the dark-skinned girl that he had a crush on for months and was now his girlfriend. “Yesterday we went on a date and I took her swinging around the city. She loved it.”

“That’s great.” You smiled fakely, hoping that Peter wouldn’t notice but of course he did. He immediately noticed the small glint in your eyes and the crinkles on your forehead as you nibbled on your bottom lip, tearing your gaze away from his. “I’m really happy for you.”

“Hey,” Peter frowned, placing a comforting hand on your thigh, forcing your softened eyes to meet his concerned ones. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing-” you tried to lie but was then cut off when Peter shook his head, causing you to stop and stare at him confusingly. “Don’t try to lie to me, Y/N. I know when you’re lying.” Peter sternly pointed out. “It’s just me. Talk to me.”

You could feel your heart beating against your chest as you stared down at your hands, trying to put your words together. “Peter I-” Before you could even properly say anything both of your phones suddenly went off, seeing that you guys both received a text from Ned in the group chat the three of you shared. The text saying in all capitals “TURN ON THE NEWS”

Without asking why, Peter grabbed your television remote and turned your guys’ movie off, changing it to the news channel. And that’s when you felt both of your hearts stop. Playing on your television was a video of Mysterio saying how Peter was Spider-Man, the video then changing into a yearbook photo of your best friend.

You turned to face Peter, your heart sinking at the sight of his glossy eyes and the frown on his lips.

The entire world now knew that Peter Parker was Spider-Man.

- - -

It’s been two weeks since the world found out that Spider-Man was none other than sixteen-year-old Peter Parker. It’s also been two weeks since you’ve seen Peter yourself.

When the world found out he was Spider-Man, Peter has been practically attached to the hip with MJ, constantly with her, making sure her she was safe. You could feel your heartache every time you could see him by her side, his hands always gripping hers or having a protective arm around her. You wondered why he never checked up on you, your his best friend and it bothered you. Did he not care about you?

You were so lost on your thoughts that you didn’t hear Mr. Delmar call you until you felt him grab your shoulder, bringing you back to reality. “Hey kid, is Peter coming soon? I gotta close shop.”

“Um,” you glanced down at your phone, seeing that Peter was already three hours later. “No, he isn’t.” You frowned, standing up from your seat and smiling apologetically at Mr. Delmar who was staring at you with sympathetic eyes. “Sorry kid, I’m sure he was just caught up with something—especially after everything that has been going on lately.”

You didn’t say anything other than gave the older man one last smile before leaving his deli store and began to make your way home. As you walked home, you couldn’t help but start to feel angry, reaching for phone inside your pocket and quickly dialed Peter’s number. You then rolled your eyes when you were sent to voicemail, like usual now.

“Hey Peter,” your voice laced with anger. “You missed our dinner plans at Delmar’s, again. You know, the one we made together when you couldn’t make it to our movie night last week.” You didn’t know you were crying until you felt your tears drop onto your arms. “I just miss you, Pete. We don’t see each other anymore, we don’t even talk. You always ditch me at lunch to sit with MJ, you don’t answer my calls and you don’t reply to my texts. Can you-” you paused, hearing a couple footsteps behind you, sending goosebumps along your skin. “Can you just please call me back? Bye, Pete.”

The moment you hung up your phone the footsteps became louder, sending your heart into overdrive as you quickened the pace of your walking.

Thinking you could escape whoever was following you, you jumped when two men suddenly came from the dark alleyway in front of you, devilish smirks on their faces. “So, you’re Spider-Man’s girl?”

“W-What?” You croaked out, taking a couple cautious step back only to have your back collide into someone’s chest. You turned around, your eyes widening when seeing another two men standing behind you. “N-No I’m not. I-I don’t even know Spider-Man-”

“Don’t try to lie to us!” One the other men snapped, one of his hands gripping onto your arm and shoving you into the dark alley, hissing in pain when your body fell onto the ground. “My boys remember that little Spider freak saving you from Adrian Toomes, our former boss.”

“And we’ve tried so hard to find a way to make Spider-Man pay for making us lose our jobs and spend years in jail.” Another man took over, pacing around you, causing your skin to turn pale from fear. “And when his true identity was revealed, it wasn’t hard to find the people he cared for to target.”

You felt your heart drop into the pit of your stomach at his words. “Who else are you going after?” You questioned, your mind being filled with images of May, Ned, and—MJ.

“Right now,” the main man stepped forward, a smirk clear on his face as he pulled something out of his pocket. Your eyes then widened, filling with tears of pure horror when realizing that it was pocketknife, the bright moonlight reflecting off the sharp blade and hitting your face. “Only you.”

- - -

Peter found himself waking up at the feeling of the empty spot next to him on his bed, his mind wondering where MJ was. After a long night of watching Star Wars, May allowed MJ to spend night, only if they promised no funny business and kept the door open. She knew that ever since Peter’s secret was exposed that he became extra protective over his new girlfriend, not wanting him worry if she did leave in the middle of the night.

When Peter got up from his bed he could hear the faint sound of the living room’s television on. And when he entered the room, his eyes immediately landed on May and MJ, who were currently watching the news with tears in their eyes.

“What’s going on, May?” Peter asked out of complete worry, walking towards MJ and taking her trembling figure into his arms. “Hey, you okay?”

“Don’t look at the tv, Peter.” Was the only thing MJ said, her glossy eyes staring into Peter’s confused ones.

“Why-” Peter began to ask but stopping when he saw your photo appear on the screen of television, the next words coming out of the news’ anchor causing his entire world to come crashing down.

“-and onto depressing news, this morning a passing pedestrian came across a female body laying in an alleyway near Delmar’s Deli and Grocery. The police were on the scene at sunrise to collect any evidence that was left. The evidence that they managed to collect revealed that victim was a sixteen-year-old girl named Y/N L/N.  And from an anonymous source, we’ve learned that the girl was friends with Spider-Man himself.  Now we must ask, was this just a normal robbery gone wrong?  Or a violent--horrific act to get Spider-Man’s attention?  We may never know.”

Peter fell down onto his knees as another photo of you appeared on the screen, this picture revealing what exactly happened. Peter felt himself choking on his sobs as tears began to spill uncontrollably down his face, taking in the features of what was now your lifeless body. Seeing the bruises that covered your arms, the cuts that littered your face and clothes you were wearing that were torn apart, showing off your now pale skin. The sound of May and MJ calling out to him went faint as he soon came to realize...

He was protecting the wrong person.

Send in any Peter Parker/Tom Holland requests you guys have.

- Permanent Tags -

@laic2299

[min30am]

Does the music you listen to shape your perception of the world?

Immediately, yes. Definitely, no doubt. I pretty often link songs to different times in my life or places or specific events or people. It’s actually more difficult for me not to do that. 

Hotline Bling - driving back up del Este, or back to the parking lot for mock trial practice at 5pm. It’s the winter months usually, so it’s pretty dark out at that point. Quick snacks from the local Quickly are always a good bet, or Chipotle of course. Bright classroom lights, hearing the rest of the trial drag on in the adjacent room while the pre-trial attorneys hang out doing nothing really in the room facing the street. 

Starboy - we’re in an Uber to the ice rink in Oakland, it’s the evening after Yule Ball. We met at my first ever Halloween party but I’m decently sure I like you; I’d pretty much broken up with someone else that same night, over speaker phone with more than a few friends eavesdropping in our room. Anyway, we’re in the backseat of the Uber and you mention that you really like this song, and you start singing along and it’s cute- cute enough to make an impression. You turn out to be a really really good skater, and you don’t leave my side all night even though I’m an awful one. 

Under the Cover of Darkness - first time hanging out with a few people just having a jam session with our mix of guitars. A slightly condescending guy who’s good at solos teaches me a set and decides he thinks I’m a fast learner. Flattering enough. 

Out of My League - I looped the Fitz and the Tantrums album that this belongs to that summer that I spent painting the house kokong built at Marcy’s. There was a lot of detailed work that went into it, and I sketched the designs meticulously in pencil before going over it with the metallic paint shades I’d picked out. 

You & Me - this particular Disclosure song was really popular but after that one YouTube comment talking about how the highs were screechingly, painfully high, I could never listen to it without being way too aware of that. Thanks, whoever that was. 

Location - this was a song I generally really liked when it was in its hayday, but it’s had a little bit of a different flavor and nice comfortable blue bit of nostalgia ever since Eli told me he associated it with me. 

High You Are - the height of my Youtube playlist days, barring the AMVs with Linkin Park songs. I had another Odesza song that I linked to this one, Say My Name featuring Zyra. Great times, definitely middle school and early high school. 

Tennis Court, Wires, King - all linked to the same person, listening to these songs by the stairs at the far end of the high school on a shared pair of wired earphones after school, blue skies and mild breezes and radiant sun off the metal handrails. 

Fell in Love With a Girl - hilariously coincidental lyrics, thanks for this one. 

Trndsttr - driving back from the hospital, specifically in the morning after drop-offs at work. It’s cold and not too bright yet, but the sun will definitely be in my eyes on the drive back up toward the fountain intersection. My contacts are cooperating at least. 

One Time - that one concert we went to with Kou, pretty spontaneously but it was pretty good. Cool venue too.

My Funny Valentine - listening to this on the bus to Loch Ness, the same trip I believe that we hit heavy traffic on the winding road back toward Glasgow. There’s a beautiful lake at the bottom of the hill that our road spans, lots of the richest green you’ve ever seen in trees. The whole Ella album was pretty popular that trip, and this particular song felt like an inside joke to listen to next to you. 

Love Galore - we’re up by the Sutro Tower parked in a little dusty area by a few other cars that made the winding drive up. The view is pretty clear and definitely impressive, we’re trying to identify things and you’ve already finished telling me a long made-up story about how the tower works- which I believed because you, after all, have a masters in engineering. 

Foreplay, IV. Sweatpants - it’s first year and we spend all our free time meeting up at night just to freeze our asses off because we’re talking and it’s so easy and so funny and we don’t want to go home. It’s the 2am campanile talks at the bench, where we move at the pace of kdramas. It’s sitting by the now-renamed boalt hall, I’ve never met anyone I clicked with better and I still won’t say I’m in love.

Cheese & Wine - bro forreal your dad’s an asshole. seriously.

TALK ME DOWN - senior year of high school, you’re obsessed with Troye Sivan but he’s pretty good so no one in the car complains. Our friend group is hanging out so often at boba and coffee places and just talking nonstop, we have every class together pretty much and so many small things happen in that last year. 

Girls That Dance - that overcrowded, cozy, compact dorm room on the eighth floor. We’re there so often, you always pick me up from mine and we walk or bike down together, sometimes we take the shuttle. Jerry is always there, always greets us and talks to us about his nephew and his life. We have Olay by the mirror near the door, which I discover serves as a bit of a primer and is SPF15. We make ramen and Jess uses your desktop to play games while we watch Netflix movies in your top bunk. 

Cardiac Arrest - I, like the monumental asshole I am, make it a point to finish chemistry lab in the morning as quickly as possible so I can be the first person to leave every time. I always play this song as I’m going up those curved wide stairs to take that little bridge back up to the castle on the hill. I almost invariably get back to my room and waste all the time I saved by finishing early. 

Liquor Locker - chilling at lab, doing what I’m supposed to be doing between classes or meetings. Dilution calculations are scribbled in my green lab notebook. I’m responsible for many colonies of single-cell babies but at least a quarter of my attention is on the bus tracker while I run the math in my head. 

Shutter Island - we’re all at the Vevo Halloween concert together in a gigantic warehouse on the water’s edge. I’m absolutely taken with the singer and thus starts a pretty long infatuation with her music. No one else agrees, they definitely think she was the worst of the night. Fair enough. 

GOLD - we’re in the backseat of his car and he and his girlfriend are great. We already had dinner all together that one night before the concert- a vibe check - and now we’re in San Jose to check out a viewpoint where you and I just enjoy each other’s company. It’s our first double date(s) really, and it’s pretty great. 

Trois Gymnopédies - honestly, such a great song but I deadass sought it out after seeing it on a sad parrot video. 10/10

Heebiejeebies - definitely love this song but I don’t know if I can listen to anything from this album without remembering how you were so ready to start a fight at that concert. Again. 

If We Ever Meet Again - I have really strong feelings of being on a field trip associated with this song somehow. 

[angel-emmerson]

Processing | Self-Para

death tw, grief tw, addiction mention tw, depression tw

(it’s one of his therapy sessions so it’s a lot <3)

“Mr. Ángel, I gotta admit I was starting to get worried you wouldn’t call me. Beautiful day to be out here though.”

“Sorry Doc, you know I’ve been kind of all over the place. Thanks for coming all the way out here.” Ángel held out his hand to dap Dr. Ramirez up and pull him in for a quick pat on the back. He had been seeing him since he was 15 and Dr. Ramirez had been on of the first latinx men in his life and one of the few male role models that he had as constants. In the past few weeks he had talked to a few of his therapist but he knew that if he asked Dr. Ramirez to meet him out here that he would and a nice drive to Portland had been exactly what he needed to feel like he could finally get a breather from Redwood Bay after all of the chaos. 

“So this is where you almost went pro, huh?” 

Ángel’s smile turned up a bit as he nodded and looked around the Portland State lacrosse field. “Yeah man, I was standing right over there when the scout came down and made me my first offer, after that the fucking letters just came pouring in.” He picked up the lacrosse stick he had brought with him, only just having been cleared for mild physical activity so he didn’t want to overdue it. But he tossed a ball into there and started to move it back and forth in his hands. 

“Do you regret it, not taking those offers?”

“Yeah, I mean, look I don’t live my life in regret but I think about it a lot, you know? I think I was so..eager to get back home after graduation like I had missed something that I didn’t even think about how my life could have been, you know? Fucking traveling and playing, training to be the best, getting myself connected to people all over the world through one sport. I mean hockey was fun but lacrosse?” He paused and from midfield threw the ball straight into the goal. “It was like something no one could touch, you know? Not enough people understand it as it is so I felt like I was just in another world. Where I could be angry and aggressive but strategic, you know? I mean I went home cause I felt like..people needed me but then everyone left anyway,” he added with a sad laugh before he slowly started walking to retrieve the ball. 

“So does that mean you feel resentful of people at home? Since you feel like because of them you gave up this dream?”

He was shaking his head before the doctor finished, knowing he was just asking questions to pull him out of his head, it was how it always went. “Nah I don’t resent them, I mean no one asked me to come home, you know? Only person I could be mad at is me. I mean I came home and two of my friends I lost years with cause of addiction, feeling helpless when it came to them was just..shitty and I mean they’re in better places now and I couldn’t be more proud but all that time is gone, you know? And then Zehra went off to see the world and find herself, my sister went to California, Kai went off to fight a war. Everyone went and did what they wanted. Well, everyone except for Levi.”

The name made his expression falter and it didn’t go unnoticed to Dr. Ramirez but he stayed quiet for a moment as he observed Ángel picking up the ball and avoiding looking at him. “How are you dealing with his passing?”

“I’m not.” A sad laugh fell from his lips and he took a deep breath as he lifted his head. “I mean I don’t...I don’t know man. It feels like everyone around me just can’t handle me being fucked up about it, I mean they say they’re there for me and I know they are but I’ve been in such a good place for such a long time it’s like people can’t fucking...compute it when I’m depressed as fuck. And yeah, yeah I feel that way man. I mean fuck, you see over there,” he pointed at a spot in the bleachers, his eyes already starting to tear up as he said. “Levi used to sit there every fucking game. He’d get here early so he could get his seat, always wearing the hoodie or the t-shirt I got him, he’d save seats for my moms when they’d come I mean, the guy practically lived with me in college. He should’ve been the one in college, I mean my dude was so smart. So fucking smart. He had to drop out cause of his mom but like I wouldn’t have graduated without him. After I rushed, he stayed in the frat house with me. I got him a mattress and we fucking built a frame for it. And no one said shit, I paid extra dues and I mean no one would complain cause he was helping us all fucking pass college, you know? I mean this dude’s brain, the books he’d read, all the shit he’d say, he was destined for greatness, you know? And we spent so much time together, he was the one person that never left, you know? And it’s not cause I asked him to stay it was just like..it was like we understood that if we did this life together, if we stayed strong, if we did what we could for our families then we’d live a good fucking life, you know? But now I’m pissed, I’m pissed cause he’s gone and,”

He could feel his bottom lip quivering as he leaned against the goal and reached up to wipe at his eyes. “Every fucking morning I get up and I-I listen to this voicemail he sent me about two weeks before the fire. I was like two minutes late to picking him up for the gym and he knows I already ride him about time. So he calls me and I don’t pick up cause i”m driving and he’s just fucking singing all by myself at the top of his lungs. Sounded fucking terrible but man I can’t stop listening to it. He laughs at the end and it’s just like,” he paused as he sniffled and wiped at his eyes, “It’s like every day I think about all the shit he’s not gonna be there for, you know? Like my kids being born, like getting married, like man, he was supposed to be there, I was supposed to be there to watch him. For our kids to grow up together, for our lives to just keep growing. And I feel like I took all this time for granted. I feel like the night of the fire was just another day, you know? Like I hugged him and we joked around and he made me drink this actually pretty fucking good organic juice and I was supposed to see him the next week. We were gonna go for a quick morning gym time so then we could finish working on this shit in my garden. And now I look outside and I can’t...I can’t even touch anything cause I just...I keep seeing him there with the dogs an I-.” his words become jumbled as he covered his face with his hand and started crying and when he felt the Doctor’s hand on his shoulder, he turned into him to be embraced into a much needed hug. “He was my best friend,” he repeated a few times as his body shook and he felt that fresh wave of sadness rush through him. 

When he finally managed to calm down, he wiped at his face a few times, not bothering to mumbled an apology because he wasn’t sorry for being vulnerable in front of him. This was what he needed, to be honest, to let it come out of him, to admit that he wasn’t okay. 

“I miss him so much, man. And I..I get so angry at people who like didn’t know him but want to like pretend like they did, you know? And like I get it, people grieve and they sympathize but they didn’t know him. They didn’t know what it was like to be his friend, to hear him laugh, to feel his hugs, to see that dopey fucking smile. And I mean Zehra’s fucking torn up about it and I want to be strong for her, I can’t be this fucking mess. She needs me to be stronger than this so that we can get through this. I mean fuck, she was there, man, how the fuck is she ever gonna bounce back from that? But I gotta be there. I gotta, I can’t, I can’t lose her too. I wouldn’t survive it.” He let out a deep breath and shook his head, “I need to sit down. This is the most I’ve been out since I got home from the hospital.”

He thanked Dr. Ramirez for handing him a tissue and he wiped up his face and blew his nose before taking a seat on the bleachers, right where Levi used to sit. He smiled as he took in the sight of the field, feeling like it was a whole other life now. “I’m turning 33 in a few weeks and I think it’s getting to me,” he admitted after a moment of silence, taking his hat off so he could clutch it in his hands. “Thirty-three, man I mean shit, you and I both know that I didn’t even think I’d make it to 23.”

“Do you feel unhappy with where you’re at?”

He took a deep breath as he thought about it. “Unhappy? No, I mean, aside from right now, I feel like before all of this and the shit with my parents I was pretty happy. I mean I don’t feel like my life is a failure. I-I guess I just thought that by now I’d feel more purpose, you know? I love what I do but I’m no passionate about it, I love my dogs and my house but man I-I want to have more. I want a spouse, I want kids, I want my life to get bigger and I just feel like it’s not gonna happen for me. Not in a fucking pity way but like in a very genuine way. Like Brady doesn’t believe she’s gonna get married which is bullshit but I’ve..I’ve always known that I would, you know? But like lately I’m not so sure.”

“But last time you were saying that you met someone..I mean is that over..how has that been?”

Ángel’s smile turned up for a second before it dropped. “Her name is Leslie. She’s...I mean she’s unlike anyone I’ve ever been with before. She has a really great heart, man. And she suffered this like..huge loss and I don’t think she’s recovered from it either. She’s super fucking smart, funny as hell, kind of crazy and a little mean but not in a like Regina George kind of way. Like I wouldn’t say she’s a mean person, she just says some mean shit to people and even mean is not the word I’d use. I mean she tells ‘em like it is, just not in a sugar coated way. I don’t know, I-” he stopped himself and took a deep breath. “Honestly Doc, I-I think I’m in love with her. Like forreal, you know? Not like in a dream, my heads in the clouds and shit. Like I love her, as a person. But being in love with her? Man I...I feel like I’m there already and it’s fucking freaking me out. Cause I’m not like..I’m not like a guy who just jumps into shit, especially not with someone who couldn’t be more relationship resistant if they tried. But when I’m with her I just...I feel like I feel with you right now you know? Like I can be real, and honest and myself and even when I do shit that she gets annoyed by, it still feels like something that we’ll talk about. She doesn’t lie to me, she’s honest with me about how she feels and I appreciate that. She doesn’t make me feel dumb. She makes me feel like I’m fucking flying man. Like when her eyes are on me, I feel like the luckiest dude in the world. I think she’s fucking amazing. But..”

He paused and took another deep breath, turning his hat over in his hands. “But she’s got a drinking problem and I’m not sure what to do about it. You know there’s no way, there’s no way we could..be together when she’s figuring so much shit out, you know? I mean I want to be with her, I know that for me but I also know that I gotta be patient if she’s who I really want because she’s..I mean she’s kind of all over the place right now. I don’t think there’s been a single time I’ve had her over where she hasn’t been drinking beforehand. I mean I’m not her fucking white knight, you know? I’m not trying to swoop into her life and fix everything, I know firsthand that real change comes from within, comes from what you’re willing to put out there. And I mean I have Quinn and Julian, who I was with side by side as they struggled with their addictions, with drinking and I mean you had to force me to set boundaries until it got too bad. So like I don’t want to interfere but I also don’t want to keep pretending like it’s not happening, you know? Like do I just wait for her to figure it out, do I talk to her mom, do I just try to talk to her about it or do I shut the fuck up and wait for something worse to happen.” The idea got him choked up again and he sighed as he pinched the bridge of his nose. “I keep having these scary fucking thoughts of hearing from her mom that they had to go get her stomach pumped or she fell into the fucking harbor and drowned and it’s extreme but, she already doesn’t feel enthusiastic about being home and being...alive so.” He sighed and dropped his hat so that he could run his hands over his head. “I want to help her, that’s more important to me than being her boyfriend. I care about her, as a person, I always have. I have since I was fucking 13 years old. I want good things for her, even if I’m not it. But where do I start? How do I start without totally losing her? I don’t want to lose her man, I fucking love her.”

“So you mean to tell me you’re carrying all of this and recovering from almost dying? Am I getting that right?” Dr. Ramirez let out a low whistle as Ángel nodded. “First things first, and we’ve talked about this before, but you can’t stop yourself from feeling your feelings. If your family and friends are not equipped to handle you being upset then they have to learn, you don’t have to pretend just because you think it will be easier on them. You’re not doing yourself any good. You lost someone very important to you, that healing doesn’t just happen over night, you know that, you’ve been working on your healing for years. It’s going to take time but you owe it to yourself to give yourself that time, take it day by day and let others be there for you. I can’t be the only person you’re honest with. If you’re not honest then everyone is just gonna assume that you’re fine and you’re gonna have another breakdown that you could have avoided. Another outbursts, another fight. Why have that happen when you could be honest? You are so good at articulating your feelings when you let yourself, that makes you more intelligent than half of the ivy league graduates, Ángel. You can’t let make yourself into a burden when you’re not.” 

“Everyone in your life loves you, and they will hold space for you, even if it pushes them to learn the same skills you had to learn to be there for them. You didn’t wake up this open and vulnerable, or do you forget our first session where you broke about six of my pencils? As for Leslie, well, you said it yourself, you’ve been through similar things with Julian and Quinn and of course it’s different. She’s the woman you love, but if what you say you feel is true than you need to find a way to help before it’s too late. Now, she may not react well to you just asking her directly, she might feel like you’re lecturing her. But something is better than nothing, you know? You have to be thoughtful, and I would maybe ask your friends for what might be helpful, what would have been helpful for them to hear when they were in that space. But you can’t do nothing, you can’t do nothing and hope it’ll go away, you know that. I know you know that and so yes, you have to decide that being there for her, trying to help her find her sobriety, is more important than you wanting to be her boyfriend. And that’s incredibly hard, but it’s incredibly easy to be selfish, it takes a whole lot of cojones to be selfless. But if anyone can do that, if anyone can reach within and find that kindness, that gentleness, it’s you. I believe in you, Ángel. But somewhere along the way you stopped believing in yourself. In your strength. You have to remember that’s there. You can’t give up on yourself, you have to keep going but you also have to give yourself grace, mano, give yourself grace. Remember that, repeat that to yourself. Grace. It’s your word of the month. You’re going to make it to 33! 33 years, man. that’s 32 years more than anyone ever thought, that you though and that is no small feat. You did that.”

Ángel took a deep breath and closed his eyes as he thought about everything Dr. Ramirez had said. He knew he hadn’t failed but he felt like it. Maybe he had stopped believing in himself, maybe he had stopped being proud and trying harder, maybe he had just hit a wall and never bothered to get around it. Tragedy had a way of bringing things to light and he felt like he was looking at his life with a whole new lens. He didn’t feel better but he felt more hopeful, like he had better tools to navigate this grief and confusion. He had to take care of himself, that much was clear, but he also had to stop stressing himself out with taking care of others so much. It didn’t mean he had to stop but he did have to take a different approach, Leslie included. “Give myself grace,” he said finally, and repeated it again as he took deep breathes. “Okay, okay, yeah, I’m gonna give myself grace,” he promised, his head still pounding from crying but the sun was shining so sweetly on the field and he closed his eyes for a moment to feel it on his face. To feel like it could have been any other day and Levi would be bounding up the steps at any moment. The truth was that Ángel wasn’t okay, he was devastated and depressed and feeling lost but he knew that he would be okay. He would be okay. And that had to be enough.

He took a deep breath and got to his feet, putting his hat back on as he grabbed his gear and they made their way back down the steps. He paused as he got to the bag he had brought with him and he pulled out a picture of him and Levi from his last championship game. “I have another copy of this, I just..I don’t know,” he stopped himself and instead of explaining, he took the picture and knelt down, digging up some of the dirt on the field with his stick before he lay the picture there and covered it. “Seems kind of dumb but I just..want this place to always have a piece of us,” he admitted. “Levi’s Jewish so the customs are different and I’m not supposed to like talk about him partying it up with the angels and shit but I don’t know, trying to find little things to pay honor in my way.” He glanced up at the sky despite himself, his smile twitching up a bit. “Love you forever, brother,” he mumbled before finally turning away, grabbing his things so they could head back to their cars and get something to eat. 

Ángel stopped short as they got to their cars and offered a soft smile. “Doc, I know we pay you for this but uh, in case I never said it enough, thank you. For doing what you do, for being my fucking therapist, my mentor, my role model, I just...you remind me of why I’m so happy I’ve stayed alive. Of why I’m so happy I get to see 33. So thank you for that.”

Dr. Ramirez’s own smile turned up as he held his hand out for Ángel to take before wrapping him up in a hug. All these years watching him grow, keeping things professional and helping him through but there was no doubt that the man in front of him had become one of his sources of pride. “Hey, anytime, Angelito. Don’t forget, you’ve always got people that have your back.”

He nodded and finally got in his car, feeling lighter and heavier all at the same time but as he started up his truck, he said the words he’d be saying to himself for weeks and weeks to come. 

“Gotta give myself some grace.” 

[xerborgen]

high school shit

i was actually just watching some back to school videos on youtube and oh boy am i inspired to actually write this entry! i’m going into my last year of high school this incoming school year, and this is what i got so far.

things that I noticed/realized/experienced in high school:

1. i wanted to be alone most of the time

2. i developed a liking to studying for exams/doing notes

3. once something slips out of your mouth, you already have a +1 weight on your shoulders 

4. its never good to shut out your friends and expect them to understand it. you owe them an explanation 

5. never get too attached. initially, i’m not a kind of person that gets attached attached, i never really resented anyone who left me or never really missed someone that much and seemed possessive. 

6. things can go incredibly slow, and incredibly fast

7. slice of tasks off your to do list as many as you can. sometimes i do time my working periods whenever i get that random shot of productivity but sometimes that just doesn’t really do the job a lot, especially if i have a shit ton of works to do over the week. try to do better every time.

8. work better, not harder - whenever i’m doing an overnight homework or task and my eyes get droopy real hard that i can’t even focus on what i’m doing or why the fuck i was there anymore, i choose to go to sleep and not strain myself, and pay myself back in the morning. i come to school early as possible - if not, then i try to “cram” into finishing the homework before the subject when its needed starts. LOOK i know cramming is BAD but i kinda powered through it???? for example, if i cant understand the my fucking math homework the night before, there’s no use stressing out and trying hard to understand it. instead, i go to school and before math class starts, i approach a few classmates to teach me how to do it ((or maybe,,,,, , , give me some answers and i’ll just learn it in time)). that literally saved my life in the long run.

9. in line with my previous statement, its good to have a few close friends and a good reputation in class. i realized that acting emo isnt going to magically have someone gravitate to me and help. i had to reach out, go out there, and even if i dread a lot of people and i have only a few i can tolerate I HAD TO GO OUT THERE AND TAKE IT LIKE A MAN !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

10. i’ve learnt how to say no

11. even if my chair is left handed or not my fucking back is still going to hurt like a lil bitch

12. i realized how much i daydreamed about school ending and then like???? whap???? the new year comes and like whoosh??? its my finals already?????

13. value time

14. lo-fi is literally my ride or die, this bitch really was at my side EVERYTIME. but forreal, whenever i study or do stuff i usually put on some lo-fi beats and everything just gets better.

15. jack of all trades, master of none. i have a few well-known classmates whom are known to be all-rounders, and a lot of people envied them and proclaimed how they were good at everything. hearing and seeing these made me feel bad about myself, because all i was really good at  knew was how to edit, design, dance, study - and i was never sporty nor good at any musical instrument which are UNFORTUNATELY the talents that a lot of people consider as “cool”. 

- but, it kinda warms my heart whenever there are video presentations or design stuff that gets put on discussion, few of my classmates turn to me and depend on me about it. its like they knew, they knew they could trust me about it, because they liked how i liked how i do. and that kind of makes me giddy... the thought of giving them unceremoniously something to remember me by.

16. i dont know why didnt i put this FIRST but this is actually my favorite. usually, i tend to want to go home immediately after a long day in school, thus making my dad fetch me after class (side note, i dont know if this is a stigma or not but getting fetched after school lowkey is kinda uncool, because i dont know.......im a grown 15 yo waiting for my fetcher to come pick me up but i powered through it and come to the conclusion that i dont rlly care i just want to go home)

16.5 me and my close friends, S, L, G, A, we like to eat at this takoyaki place near my house (its actually inside a mall of some sort, its just a ten minute walk from my place to there). i usually secretly brought my phone with me to school, so even if these takoyaki dates were sudden, i had no reason to bring the offer down. i usually spend these food trips with my friend S, which with the courtesy of her kind mother, usually considers letting us eat at this takoyaki place while she lets their cute dog shanaia be groomed in the pet parlor. me and S, during these times, have talked a lot about different stuff, and i’m really thankful for her - as well as to my other close friends. although i don’t treat anyone as a best friend, they shouldn’t underestimate how much they mean to me.

- having an older sister is nice... me and my older sister actually had a conflict before. i was at an age where everything was just so emotionally scarring that it inflicted some kind of bitter wound in my heart that i just refused to mend that time. i rarely used the word hate, but at that time, i hated my family. i hated how i was treated, i hated how i was so hopeless, but i clung to any piece of comfort i longed. i guess i was just an emotional mess back then... this was all when i was in sixth grade.

things have changed a lot now. my parents have started to listen somehow. i found out that my sister was actually going through something so traumatizing that i failed to acknowledge because i let my emotions take over me.

- now... i gradually am trying to control my emotions - not the other way around. because once your emotions take over you, you get vulnerable. you get easily bitten. you let your guard down, and in this world, keeping your guard down is one risk that you should be wary of taking. 

its not that i’m preventing myself to feel, to enjoy... but to regulate my emotions and place them where its best. talk when you’re allowed to, or only talk about personal stuff when i’m with my close friends. once a person sees into me... it could be game over. 

i make decisions. and i have to avoid certain circumstances where i could possibly feel a lot of unwanted emotions. although a lot of things are stringed together by fate, and sometimes the scissors are nowhere to be found, and that i was supposed to do something that could blow my cover. its really better if you know yourself, you control yourself. if i couldnt avoid, modify how i behave. how i react. control what i show on the outside.

- i deserve some kind of happiness atleast... i shouldn’t be too hard on myself. i know this, but the pathetic thing is, i can’t do it. sometimes the only thing that deprives me of my own happiness is myself - which is for me, something so pathetic that i can’t even get sick of it.

- if there’s a will, there’s a way

- sometimes its good to look back once in a while... to see how far you’ve gone. if i can still see fragments of my past, then i’ll use that to strive to get further, further away from the demons that haunts me. if i can’t, then... smile, and look forward.

- you can fear things. but don’t let it show on your face. instead, fight it, anyway.

- everyone is just scared as i am.

- i don’t necessarily need to say my stand.

- i can’t judge dramatic people because that would mean i’m judging myself. but when did i have stopped judging myself?

- its good to go out for walks once in a while.

- rainy days elongated with a class suspension are always stuff to look forward for and cherish. the rain only visits me once in a while, i miss it.

- moments are traces of life

- sometimes, you never really see the value of something until they’re gone... 

シルエット

[punkscowardschampions]

Rio & Buster

Rio: So, I'm having a hard time getting her to move but Rio: Quinn's being pretty decent considering Rio: Saving her from total embarrassment Buster: Well, that's something Buster: Do you want me to come help? Buster: I can always carry her out Rio: Nah, you're okay Rio: She'll clock it ain't working in a few and don't reckon either of you wants you to be there for that Buster: True Buster: And I don't need her trying to fight me Buster: She already knows I lied about why I trashed my room even if she can't catch me in it Buster: Things are weird enough, like Rio: Exactly Rio: Best to avoid unless you want your truths coming into question 'cos she's outed herself Buster: At least this does answer our question of whether she really did like the girl or not Buster: Type not so set in stone Buster: And if nothing else you've earned yourself yet more fruit Rio: Least she does now Rio: Even if she reckons the teach was her first love, Quinn was other firsts so, shit matters too Rio: Just trying to get my five a day, obviously Buster: I'll feed you grapes later, no need to go so hard with the heroics, babe Rio: What can I say? Rio: You inspire it in me, clearly Buster: 'Course Buster: How is she really though? Rio: Drunk, jealous and sad Rio: but she'll be fine Rio: No need to worry, honest Buster: She's had plenty of practice at wanting someone she can't have Buster: Honestly same Buster: Shame we can't bond over it, but Buster: I don't reckon she'd appreciate my success story at the moment anyway Rio: Yeah, somehow not seeing that as what she wants to hear rn 😏 Rio: Don't worry babe, always the fam to fall back on Rio: 😬 Buster: That just sounds like you wanna set Nance up with another cousin Buster: Good try, but I don't reckon she'd go for it Rio: I mean it's Billie or nothing really Rio: slim pickings Buster: Rude Buster: Don't worry I won't tell her you said that Rio: Good luck explaining if you did, babe Buster: 😂 Buster: Are you going home or staying out? Rio: We moving, compromise Rio: I'll probably bring her back with me when we leave Rio: or throw her at nan and granddad, like 👋 enjoy Buster: As long as she ain't on her own Buster: Take her phone too, that girl don't need to be all the texts too Rio: 'Course Rio: she's gonna have enough morning after regret to contend with Rio: this is so awkward Rio: this pub too quiet for this tension Buster: I'll take her breakfast 'cause there's no way she'll be going to school Buster: Imagine Rio: That'll be good Rio: This place [Insert] does a good veggie equivalent of a fry-up Rio: Gonna need it Buster: 'Course you know that Buster: Cheers, babe Rio: In this fam? Duh Rio: Just don't tell my Da I'm sending business away, like Buster: Your secret's safe Rio: Cheers, babe Buster: I miss you Buster: Not a secret, but Rio: Same 😔 Rio: If I gotta be dragged away, wish it was for something a bit more fun Buster: I appreciate it though, even if Nance can't right now Buster: So I'll make it up to you Rio: I don't mind really, aside from aforementioned awks and not being with you Rio: but not gonna pass up on the offer Buster: Don't, I've got nothing but time to think of ways Buster: Do you reckon I should talk to this girl, can I be that twin, like? Rio: Oh no, babe Rio: Nance would die Rio: Noble and cute but no Rio: Save that 🧠 power to thinking of all the ways Buster: I know you're right it's just like me and Nance are in a contest of who can fuck up the most right now or some shit Buster: It's such a mess Buster: I actually almost feel bad for mum and dad Rio: Not a 🏆 they want in the cabinet Rio: But really, it's bad but like, nothing REALLY bad happened Rio: Once she goes to Uni this will be so forgotton, like Buster: You reckon? Buster: I don't know, I'm not gonna forget about you when I go Rio: Bitch, like I'd let that happen 😤 Nah 😂 Rio: There'll be new girls and so much new shit in general, she'll be loving life, trust Buster: Maybe Buster: At least there's nothing stopping her from going anywhere she wants Rio: Yeah Rio: World's still your oyster, baby Buster: Don't worry, I'm not trying to swap with her Buster: I'd rather have you Rio: Good Rio: 'Cos can't say I'd be above a bit of slight stalking Rio: even though I'm seeing how well this is going, like Buster: Good 'cause I ain't been above it before either Rio: Should I be concerned or? 😉 Buster: Please, you've shown yourself right up, loving that 50 shades bloke Rio: If you're gonna buy me an Audi you can do what you like Buster: Well, if that's what you want for your birthday, I'll take everything I've bought back Rio: You're a fool Buster: You love it Rio: Yeah Rio: You better not have gone crazy with the gifts though forreal Buster: Shhh Rio: 😑 Rio: Babe Buster: I'm giving you them in secret so they don't count Buster: Besides, it's your 18th I'm not just gonna buy you a drink, am I? Come on Rio: Is that what we're saying now? Rio: Convenient if none of this counts isn't it 😏 Rio: But I didn't do a good job don't out-do me 😖 Buster: Yes you did Buster: You know I had the best birthday with you Rio: I just wanna treat you like you treat me Rio: like you deserve Buster: Baby Buster: You do Buster: Look where you are and what you're doing right now. You're so good to me all the time Buster: Above and beyond Rio: I just love you Buster: I love you too Buster: If it was about what you could buy me I'd be with Chlo like she wants Rio: Don't Rio: If you wanna motivate me to get my 💰 right, there's SO many better ways to do it Buster: I'm just saying Buster: It's not about that Buster: She wishes Rio: Least mine's my own 😒 Buster: You're doing better than me on that score Rio: Not being a bitch about you Rio: just her Buster: That's welcome any time Rio: Have you spoke to her since the last time? Buster: Nah, she must be complaining to one of her friends instead Rio: That's something Rio: She accidentally liked one of my pics the other day Rio: Hey babe 👋 Buster: I doubt that was an accident Buster: She's all about you Rio: You wish Rio: Get her off your hands, like Buster: Don't Buster: I never need that mental image Rio: 😷 Eurgh Buster: Besides, it's your family that she's changed her mind about, you've got hers made up Rio: What? Buster: Your parents are alright, shit ton of kids and all, 'cause they've got that clout of their jobs and cash Buster: You're letting the side down though, babe Rio: Why were you even talking about my fam Buster: She loves talking about you Buster: But I had to tell her your mum got her figure back 🙄 Rio: 🙄 Of course Rio: She better get my name out her mouth though Rio: She don't know me Buster: I don't think she's ever said your name Buster: You're always like THAT cousin or whatever Rio: Not the point Rio: that's even worse, like Buster: Don't worry, babe I'd never let her bad mouth you Rio: Whatever Rio: not like you can defend me Buster: Of course I can Buster: I always do Rio: Does that not get a bit Rio: risky, like Rio: I'm always so paranoid when anyway starts talking about you Buster: It's fine, I'm not an amateur and I swear she barely listens to me anyway so Rio: I hope so Rio: don't be chatting to her so much yeah Buster: Trust me, it's not something I wanna do Rio: I know, I know Rio: Ugh, can't even blame current company and drama but I will to save face, like Buster: You don't have to worry about Nance, she ain't gonna remember much of this, surely Buster: Feel how you feel Rio: I don't wanna Rio: I'm not used to being jealous Buster: Then don't be Buster: Not of her Buster: It's stupid Rio: Don't call me stupid Buster: I'm not Buster: I'm saying you're acting stupid if you think Chlo's anything to be jealous of Rio: Ugh forget it Rio: You don't get it Buster: Then explain it to me Rio: It doesn't matter Buster: Yes it does Buster: Just tell me Rio: I don't know it's just Rio: she's got something over you and it's fucked that she does and I'm not saying I want something as well but Rio: fucked or not, it's still true and there Rio: you know Buster: Babe, she's clutching at straws Buster: That's how much she doesn't have Buster: You're the only one who's got me Rio: I know it's stupid Buster: It's not, really Buster: I shouldn't have said that Buster: I just don't want you feeling any kind of way 'cause of her Rio: It's alright Rio: Not trying to make this about me when you're the one really getting fucked over Buster: It still affects you though Buster: I'm not gonna be that selfish Rio: I'm sorry Rio: Sometimes I'm alright and I feel like we know what we're doing Rio: then others, my head is just fuck Buster: Don't ever say sorry for this Buster: You're handling it better than I could've asked, not that I can or would Buster: I don't deserve you Rio: What am I gonna do? Rio: Not letting you go Buster: I really want you to mean that Rio: I do mean it Buster: Yeah now, but you're always saying things are gonna be different when the kid's born Rio: 'Cos your priorities are gonna be different Rio: they just will Rio: that doesn't mean I don't mean it Buster: Maybe your priorities will be different Buster: If I'm not around as much or whatever Rio: You saying I'm going to get bored? Buster: You could Buster: If I'm up all night not sleeping but not with you, like Rio: What are you saying? Buster: I'm just saying if we reckon I'm a moody cunt now wait until I'm trying to juggle school with keeping a kid alive Buster: Only so many fruit baskets I can order, babe Rio: Yeah Rio: 'cos I'm that much of a bitch Rio: Tah Buster: Shut up Buster: That's not what I'm saying Rio: Yeah, it is though Rio: It's fine, if that's what you reckon Buster: Fuck that Rio: I'm not that much of a slag Buster: Stop Rio: Seriously Buster: Seriously, stop Buster: I don't know how we got here but you're stressing me the fuck out Rio: I'll leave then Buster: Don't Buster: Fuck's sake Buster: I'm not calling you a slag and I don't want you to go anywhere, I can't believe I have to spell that out right now Rio: What else would saying I'm gonna get bored possibly fucking mean Buster: I just meant it's gonna be hard for both of us, not just me Buster: Christ Rio: The real concern here is you clearly think you're gonna be doing night shifts so that clearly leaves me out the picture Buster: What are you talking about? Rio: You've so obviously got an idea in your head of how it's going to be Rio: and I'm not a part of that Buster: Bullshit Buster: How are you getting that from literally anything I've said? Rio: You said you're not gonna be with me Rio: so where are you gonna be? Rio: With your kid, and her Rio: and that's okay Buster: It's not fucking okay that you'd say that to me Buster: I'm obviously not gonna be with her, am I? Rio: I know you Rio: you're going to want to be with your kid, to look after it and the only way you can have it all the time is to be with her Buster: Fuck off Buster: I'll tell you like I've already told her, I don't need to be her boyfriend to be a dad to my kid Buster: What century are we in? Rio: Don't chat to me like I'm her Rio: so you're gonna be a weekend dad then, yeah? Rio: and that'll be fine Buster: How is it not? Tommy's kids from before didn't become serial killers, like Rio: You don't do anything by half Buster: Yeah well I don't have a choice this time Rio: You're not going to like it Rio: it'd be so much easier for you Buster: I don't know how you can say that Buster: I wouldn't like being with her and neither would the kid growing up in that Buster: Be real Rio: I'm not saying it'd be true love Buster: It'd be another mistake Buster: And I'm not doing that Buster: So shut up Rio: You can't say your brain hasn't gone there Rio: all I can think about is all the different ways to make this work Buster: It's gone there in her dreams and my nightmares Rio: I know Buster: Then stop Rio: I want to Rio: it's not that easy Buster: Yeah it is Rio: Bullshit, babe Buster: Why isn't it enough that I want to be with you? Buster: Why do we have to keep doing this? Rio: It is Rio: but it doesn't make the rest of this shit disappear does it Buster: Well, I can't do that so what else do you want from me? Rio: Don't make it sound like I asked Buster: I'm so fucking tired of this Buster: I don't even know if its my kid yet and I'm tired Rio: I know Rio: Just forget I said anything alright Buster: I can't Rio: Sorry Buster: Don't Buster: Just come back, yeah? Rio: Okay Rio: Might take a while to sort Nance but then I'll be there Buster: Okay Buster: Bring her if you have to, I don't care Rio: Really? Rio: Alright Buster: Not that much of a slag myself, babe Rio: Shut up Buster: No Buster: I just need you here, that's what matters Rio: I didn't mean it Rio: pretend I'm drunker than I am Buster: Babe Buster: We have to keep talking, even if it goes to shit sometimes like Rio: I don't wanna make shit harder for you Rio: I really don't Rio: even though I keep doing it Buster: Well, I don't want you not to tell me things Rio: sometimes I don't know what I'm saying though Rio: or how to say it Buster: And I do? Buster: You thought I was calling you a slag for the longest time Buster: Just keep trying for me Rio: Okay Rio: I promise Rio: we're in the cab Buster: I love you Buster: Just so you know Buster: In case I don't get to say it with Nance around Rio: No telling Rio: gone from not being in the talking mood to telling the cabbie her life story so Rio: love you too, pray for me, like Buster: Fucking hell Buster: I'll give him a tip when you get here then Buster: And get on my knees for you, of course Rio: You really had to phrase it like that Rio: when we gotta be good 😒 Buster: We never have to be that good babe Buster: She'll crash and we'll be quiet Rio: Promise Rio: 'cos I really need to unwind Buster: I know Buster: me too Rio: Yeah Rio: owe you that, like Buster: You don't owe me anything, but I still want it Rio: Good 'cos I still wanna give it Buster: Yeah? Rio: You know I do Buster: Shit, hang on Rio: ? Buster: Proof yet again there isn't a god Buster: Getting a call from satan Buster: Hold up Rio: Seriously? Rio: Ignore it, it'll be nothing but a booty call at this o'clock Buster: But what if it's not? Rio: Then she'd call someone in the country Rio: or go to the hospital Rio: Don't be stupid Buster: Don't call me stupid Buster: So much for trying to unwind with this hanging over my head, like Buster: Come on Rio: Whatever Rio: Do what you want Buster: Don't be like that Rio: Nah Rio: this actually takes the piss Rio: I'm going home Buster: Don't Buster: Whatever it is I'll have it sorted by the time you get here Rio: It's nothing, Buster Rio: it'll be nothing Rio: Jesus Rio: really got you trained already though Buster: If it's nothing it doesn't have to ruin anything, does it? Buster: Just give me a second Rio: Take as many as you like Buster: Fucking hell, Rio Buster: What happened to not wanting to make things harder for me? Rio: I'm letting you deal with the most pressing issue here Buster: Fuck you Buster: Don't do that Buster: If this is how its gonna be every time you don't get your own way Rio: Then what? Buster: I can't do this right now Buster: Forget it Rio: Of course not Rio: Chloe's on the phone Buster: Why do you have to be such a bitch when I already can't win? Jesus Buster: Go where you want. Do what you want Rio: Yeah, that's what you like about me Rio: So easy Buster: Give me one break Buster: Please Rio: Done Buster: It doesn't have to be THIS difficult Rio: No, it really doesn't Rio: any chance to play the hero though Buster: Fuck off Rio: Going

[actualltr4sh]

alright its time for another of these

1. describe yourself. i’m 5′4. i’m goofy when i feel like it. i’m pretty sarcastic or condescending depending on the mood of the receiver. i’m smart, but not on paper. i’m creative. and i’m a hot young ebony. *finger guns* 

2. if you could go anywhere for a week all expenses paid where would it be? antigua & barbuda. it’s where my dad is from and i neeeeed to be an island girl for like two seconds pls.

3. do you have siblings? 4 sisters 1 brother.

4. what is your favorite constellation, why? do not have.

5. favorite color. black.

6. what kind of music do you listen to? i like R&B, early 2000′s or that shit that’s pretty mainstream but everybody swear is lowkey (SZA, Kelela, Daniel Caesar, whoever idk). i like pop punk or alternative a lot too. florence & the machine saved me. or modern baseball, the front bottoms. whatever.

7. favorite flower. (you can name as many as you want cause flowers are awesome) i like roses. i literally have one one my arm so.

8. if you could do magic, what is the first spell you would learn? probably an invisibility spell. it seems simple and like the first thing you should do lol.

9. favorite childhood memory. wow i’ve never thought about this. there was this one christmas where they let me open all my gifts at 12. i got my nintendo DS that year and i remember hearing ‘you are my rock’ by beyonce for the first time.

10. have you ever been cheated on? ish. it sucked. he broke my heart lol.

11. if you could describe your perfect room, what would it be? it’s currently my living room. it’s really cool. actually it’d be more perfect if there was more shit on the wall. but it’s a couch and a playstation and a big tv. it’s lit.

12. favorite animal. owls. ravens. crows. i’m terrified of birds though lmao.

13. what was the last photo you took of? a board in a classroom for this project.

14. do you believe in soul mates? absolutely. i’ve had the pleasure of meeting a few.

15. do you hang toilet paper over or under? i let that shit do what it do.

16. your go to place to eat & your favorite thing to get there. i love texas roadhouse but i try something new whenever i go. chilis i get cajun chicken pasta though. no tomatoes cus i’m not a crazy person.

17. do you believe everything happens for a reason? sometimes. i do think shit just be happening though.

18. guilty pressures? what?

19. favorite mythical creature, why? witches. although i want to believe they’re real. cus they be changing shit. and shit be needing change.

20. something most people don’t know about you. i can’t drive. i’m like a C+ driver lmfao. like we won’t DIE but i’m not who you suggest to do it.

21. where did you grow up, what was it like? detroit. straight as hell. coney slaps lmfao.

22. do you believe aliens exist? that would be narcissistic of me as a human to think that we are the ONLY species to exist.

23. what was your last google search? “how to poop better.” i bullshit you not LMFAOOOOO.

24. what did your last relationship teach you? BITCH. it taught me what i needed in a relationship. what i didn’t need. to put my healing first before anyone else. that love does not always conquer all. to never put a significant other before a friend. to give myself the same love & forgiveness i would forgive anyone else. bitch, i got nothing but lessons lmao.

25. would you relocate for love? i would do anything for love with my dumbass.

26. do you hold grudges or forgive easy? i forgive, not easy, but i forgive. i also don’t hold grudges, but i don’t forget.

27. favorite book. many. eleanor & park is a easy one to say though. i’d have to think forreal. 

28. do you consider yourself an extrovert or introvert? bitch i am introverted as hell. i go days without speaking to people lol.

29. have you ever kept a journal, do you now? i have kept a diary/journal religiously since i was 5.

30. top 5 favorite movies. paid in full, bring it on, halloween, stepbrothers, horrible bosses.

31. do you believe that everything happens for a reason?: didn’t i already answer this? sometimes, nigga.

32. what is your greatest fear? falling in the oven. or never being happy.

33. favorite alcoholic beverage. crown royal vanilla. or anything. i’m that friend lmao.

34. most embarrassing thing you’ve done. be born probably.

35. do you believe in ghosts? all of that.

36. what is the best and worst part of your personality? i make a joke out of everything. the good shit, the bad shit. i’m making fun of it.

37. should you split the dinner bill? if y’all struggling, sure. if you feel like it, sure. money doesn’t matter to me honestly idc lmfao.

38. are you a good liar? ish. i try not to tbh because i don’t really know if i can pull it off lol.

39. what keeps you up at night? i be knocked out forreal LMFAO but anxiety. if i’m not asleep i’m panicking. about.. anything.

40. would you rather go without your phone or music? i truly only use my phone for music. give me an ipod i swear i’d be good.

41. do you believe in god? i believe so. i think so. maybe. yes. i’m the worst christian LMFAO

42. how do you relax when frustrated? i don’t. i have anxiety. jk. ish. lmfaooo. i shower. i write. i watch tv. i sleep. i cook.

43. what’s something that offends you? hearing people talk about mental illnesses in a way that doesn’t accurately depict the experience.

44. favorite food nachOOOOOS

45. if you were on a 10 hour flight and could sit and talk to any person the entire time, who would it be? my ex :/ he was really my best friend LMAO

46. when do you feel the most confident? lowkey, when i’m naked. i got abs and my titties sit. lmfaoooo

47. what do you do on your free time? sleep or watch tv or write.

48. is there anyone who has completely lost your respect i be looking at people differently but i don’t think i don’t respect anyone.

49. have you ever broken someone’s heart? doubtful.

50. did/do you play sports in school? yeah lol i cheered and did gymnastics.

51. when are you happiest? writing or escaping with a tv show.

52. coffee or tea? CAFFEINE ME PLS!

53. what is one possession you own you wouldn’t want to live without? as of late, my camera. i love my baby.

54. what is the first thing you notice about a person? idk. haven’t met anybody new lately.

55. what is your favorite season, why? spring or fall. spring is rainy, fall is gloomy.

56. what makes you laugh? trauma.

57. are you a clean or messy person? messy normally, clean if i’m manic or suddenly tryna shape my shit up.

58. what is important for a successful relationship? COMMUNICATION.

59. what was your upcoming like? fine. rocky. confusing. okay i guess though.

60. favorite holiday? halloween :)

61. what is the first thing you’d do if you won the lottery? pay off my all my debt. student. medical bills. all of it. i don’t wanna owe shit.

62. what’s the best pizza topping combination? bacon and ham is all i get.

63. favorite outdoor activity. going back inside, the fuck lmfaoooo.

64. how are you? honestly. i’m drunk right now so.

65. would you rather go camping in the woods or stay at a beach resort? i hate outside in general. but beaches. less bugs.

66. what is the most beautiful thing in nature? the sun/moon.

67. favorite type of candy? sour patches watermelon or swedish fish or carmello chocolate bars.

68. if your life was a book, what would be the title? ‘pieces in print’

69. what movie quotes do you use of a regular bases? oh god, do i use any?the first thing i thought of was “cha feel? cha definitely feel.” from 21 jumpstreet and i rarely even say that lol.

70. what was cool when you were young but not cool now? webkinz.

71. what’s the craziest conversation you have ever eves dropped on? i don’t remember her words exactly but something about fucking a monkey my freshman year of highschool.

72. what’s the most interesting documentary you’ve ever watched? they’re all pretty interesting. that abducted in plain sight shit was DUMB tho.

73. what’s the worst hairstyle you’ve had? bangs in the 7th grade like anybody lmao.

74. what do you like to cook? all of it. i love cooking!

75. what’s the coolest animal you’ve seen in the wild? ...in the wild? i saw a rat in the street once.

76. what’s the funniest tv show you’ve ever seen?: bitch this is hard. schitts creek. arrested development. the office. misfits. idk tv is funny as hell.

77. do you usually follow your heart or your head? both. once someone told me i made calculated risks and i will never forget it. if i want to do something i WILL do it. but before i do it i think about the best, worst, and most realistic case scenario lmao.

78. what is your favorite quote? “if you are neutral in times of oppresion you have chosen the side of the oppressor.”

79. what’s the weirdest crush you have ever had? my after school teacher in 5th grade. he actually reminds me of jim halpert now that i think about it. makes sense.

80. what’s your love language? quality time and words of affirmation. so literally hang out with me and tell me you love me.

81. do you ever feel alone? yeah. this time last year was the worst of it. i don’t feel like that too much anymore though.

82. ever been bullied? yes nigga. shit sucks.

83. are you usually early or late? on time or late. i can’t be early for the life of me you asking for too much lmfao.

84. what kind of art do you enjoy most? writing. poetry. stories. you know.

85. what do you wish you knew more about? myself.

[punkscowardschampions]

Ali & Carly

Ali: this is why i don't wear shoes Ali: i have lost one??? Ali: rescue it if you see it Carly: what do they look like Ali: just a kinda tan sandal thing Ali: just a penneys special so not the end of the world, should chuck the other one so someone can have the pair Carly: come & bring me food & then youll be here to reunite them Carly: but yea k will lean out my door & see if its there Ali: love the enthusiasm, babe 😜 Ali: can feel your come down from here Carly: dont barely remember the come up Carly: wtf happened last night Ali: not in a much better position myself but uhm Ali: mayhem, that's for sure Ali: i think you might've gone home with the wrong cousin Carly: shit Carly: my bad Carly: better read my txts Carly: who did you go w ? Ali: didn't go that far with anyone Ali: 💍 remember and such a 😇 Ali: ronan was in a mard though and i weren't up for listening to that so 🤷 Carly: aw Carly: sorry baby i'll calm him down Ali: it's chill 😂 bless him Ali: no need on my account tho i'm sure he'd be down, despite protests otherwise Carly: my inbox is Carly: cba w this rn Ali: oh baby, want a bacon sarnie and a secretary? Carly: yea Carly: gonna throw my phone w your shoe Ali: i woke up to a mystery dickpic on my phone Ali: is it rude to ask which one it belongs to because lads, sorry, not that memorable that i'm picking it out of a line-up Ali: you'll know, been more recent, i'll come over with food and lucozade for real and ruin your day with that lovely image and the actually rather creative sexts that went with it Ali: 10/10 for effort, sir Carly: cant put it on the cv or school report but my memory for 'em is good Carly: if ive seen it i'll id it Carly: ill laff if its the large ginge cousin whose name i never got Carly: sounded like a cough Ali: that's a talent and if the man can't see that, fuck him Ali: and his job in tescos, like Ali: i mean, shouldn't have a preference but i hope not 😂 Ali: soz honey but Carly: thanks baby Carly: I hope its that token english Carly: he was fit Ali: can reply if you like Ali: worse ways to waste a sunday morning than messing with boys Ali: sounding like a priest Ali: oops Carly: ha Carly: i found some fucking funny vids of us so maybe the phone shouldnt go out window before youve had a look Ali: yes, i need to see that Carly: [sends her fave of the vids] Ali: aww Ali: we're fun drunks Ali: love that for us Carly: yea Carly: im a messy bitch tho Carly: no wonder i went w the hero cousin Ali: meh, things happen at parties, everyone knows that Ali: not like you're proper attached is it Ali: though he's gonna be annoying now probs but day in the life when you're irresistible, yeah? Carly: youd know babe Carly: he wont be on site long never is Carly: so idc Carly: saved me for a nite boy youre welcome Ali: duh Ali: hottest couple in town Ali: one for the wank bank anyway Carly: yea & he is fit Carly: give him that Carly: esp when i dont understand what hes saying Ali: the best kind Ali: a boy you don't have to speak to 😜 Ali: if that's all it takes like, whip out the Gaeilge Carly: youve got the giggles but yea Carly: true Carly: but on site id just have all the oldies chatting at me if i could Carly: not trying to make them go weak Ali: they ain't daddies? boo 😥 Carly: some got many kids but thats it Carly: say something to me then Ali: [sends voice memo, probably has dirty words she'd recognise from site life and lots of loling] Carly: k Carly: so hot Carly: if your gf is mad at me for stealing you last nite you can smooth things over w her like that Ali: might have to Ali: though it ain't you she's 😤 with Ali: poor ronan, shoulda done more than snog him if she comes for him, not even worth it for that Carly: ill protect him when he lets me back near Carly: cant stay mad at this Carly: sure your girls the same Ali: She's mad 24/7 babe, just gotta hold on, like 😂 Ali: we want different things now but that's not a convo for this morning like jesus Carly: whos got the energy Carly: cba w angry Carly: yea you want a sarnie Ali: exactly, and i wanted to have fun last night but may as well have said i want his dick in or around my mouth k bye babe Carly: ha Carly: that would be fun tho Ali: tell that to past you, dashing his threesome dreams like 🤷💔 Carly: still time Ali: not me you need to promise baby Carly: yea but id rather talk to you Ali: 💚 Ali: you cute Carly: all you Carly: how you look so good coming from band? wtf Ali: psh please Ali: it was all about you 🙇 Carly: if that was true why is every memory i got from last nite just you Carly: facts Ali: had to get you away from that mirror somehow, like 😉 Ali: it was fun Carly: ha Carly: cuz your talents got me like Carly: yea it was Ali: helps when the canvas already beautiful babe Carly: aw Carly: youre sweet Ali: 🍓 Carly: gonna make me cry Ali: don't cry lil one Ali: the bacon is coming Ali: got roped into doing a shady kid swap, where is my ma, take this demon child Carly: you can bring him if you want Carly: ill put clothes on before Ali: cockblocked again 😉 Ali: nah, he needs to go get shoes Ali: ironically and unlucky, twat Carly: what size is he Carly: i can ask around when i look for yours Carly: lads flog everything and anything here on sundays Ali: his feet are big man Ali: he's only little but he's lanky af, unlike me Ali: that's fun tho Ali: imma go shopping Carly: aw Carly: yea wish i was taller Carly: ffs ma and da Ali: literally Ali: least neither of my sisters are model tall or i'd be more raging Ali: we make it work, babe Carly: & i dont have any sisters Carly: well done on that one tho ma & da Ali: speak for yourself Ali: i'm gutted Carly: oww Carly: trying to replace me like the vows were no thing Ali: you know you're my one and only Ali: but a woman got needs Carly: thats what your gf is for Carly: no Ali: yeah but i'm allowed wishful thinking too Ali: damn Carly: ive given you the mental image of me naked Carly: what more you need Ali: are you jealous of your hypothetical sister? Carly: yea if you like her more Ali: aw baby, 'course not Ali: she's a ride, yeah, but bit of a bitch too, like Carly: ha Carly: takes after our ma like Ali: sadly, straighter than you Ali: 👎 Carly: like theres a ranking Carly: just straight or not yea Ali: I mean, it is a scale but I'm not gonna try and bond with your Ma giving her the test for it, like Ali: could we tie her down for a sec, obvs Carly: hit her when shes washing up Carly: takes long Ali: okay, i'll dry 😉 Ali: what an offer Carly: trying to make me vom now Carly: take crying or blushing over Ali: soz babe Carly: her & my da dont fuck but still dont reckon youre her type Ali: don't know what's worse, that, or knowing they do Carly: im good w them not Carly: sound carries Carly: no secrets in the caravan Ali: sure there's a toilet block they could go to Ali: keeping it sexy Carly: sure my da's there doing his cry wank Carly: while my ma checks the talent Carly: we got that to look forward to in our marriage in a few years Ali: who's scouting who's cranking Ali: because frankly, i refuse either Carly: im the biggest slag so probs me Carly: sorry Ali: and I'm not Ali: igloo sisters how many times now?! 😂 Carly: ha Carly: but youre loyal Carly: me and my ma dont kno the meaning like Ali: am i Ali: you miss the part when i got on ronan Carly: o yea Carly: i forgot Ali: idk what i'm gonna do about that Ali: instant gameover but its literally so irrelevant Carly: hes a ride Carly: you should be excused for it Ali: she's a 6 on that scale, yeah, massive gay Ali: so she ain't seeing that, never mind the other shit Carly: shit yea Carly: dont tell her Ali: does that make me the worst? Ali: i should hm Carly: hes not gonna speak to her Carly: and if he brags you can call it that Ali: Yeah Ali: I don't know Carly: its that or tell her Carly: & say youre sorry Carly: we were all wasted Carly: not like you have feelings for him Ali: You're right, obviously Ali: like that's the truth but yeah Ali: might leave it unless I need to go there Ali: soz God, swing by confession later Carly: tell her youre a bi cliche Carly: she'd love it Carly: use the scale Ali: she would tho Ali: validate everything she's ever sneaky or not so thought about me Ali: soz, i need a constant stream of p n v or i die Carly: a girl has needs Carly: what am i a 1? Ali: its like dis Ali: 1- all straight 2- mostly straight but lil gay 3- equal/bi 4- mostly gay but still lil into opposite 5- total gay Ali: but not gonna resist the urge to tell you you a 10 Carly: 🥇 Carly: i like that you're 3 tho. 3's a lucky number Ali: and a magic one 🔮 Carly: yea cuz youre magical Ali: believe it baby Carly: i do Ali: right, finally leaving, be like 10 Ali: doing the opposite to a walk of shame rn, strutting back in like what's good Carly: you gotta Carly: own it baby Carly: havent found your shoe tho sorry Carly: maybe ronan took it cuz he loves you so bad Ali: 😂 oh my god Ali: like a horny puppy Carly: yea Carly: building a shrine to you rn probs Ali: or he wanna play cinderella Ali: such a ridiculous fairytale, as far as they go Carly: how wasted was the prince that he cant remember what she looks like Carly: k been there but not trying to wife anyone Ali: right?! also, sure plenty of bitches a size 5, like??? Ali: was it a magic shoe Ali: no explanation, frankly Carly: yea like me and you have the same size Carly: ill take your prince for a ride bitch Ali: 😂 Ali: he cool with that Ali: that's the tea Ali: boy gives no fucks, long as it ain't a man in drag Carly: he hasnt met your brother tho Carly: boy looks good Ali: eww Ali: stop that thought right there Carly: dont get jealous Carly: not gonna go there Ali: not jealous, but repulsed 😷 Carly: k babe Carly: if you say so Ali: trust, you wanna see jealous you'll see it soon enough if you go there Ali: 😂 bea don't fuck about Carly: have to go for one of your other hot brothers Ali: trying be my sister in law and wife Ali: kickin it country Carly: you kno Carly: been on site too long Ali: forreal, not gotta hang with the traveller lads that hard baby Carly: after last nite not gonna be hanging w them for a while Ali: let 'em fight it out amongst themselves Ali: defs for the best Carly: yea Carly: hide w me babe Carly: gonna be so bored Ali: gonna Ali: i'll peep their wares another day Ali: not a euphemism Carly: sounds dirty tho Ali: yeah, regretted it as i said it but hey Ali: love me a sale and a gypsy boy Carly: no regrets boo Carly: they love you too Carly: esp whoever send the dick pic Ali: the real mystery Ali: soz everyone else with your drama but we gotta know Carly: i do need to be knowing Carly: thats my wife lads Ali: awh you gonna defend my honour n delicate sensibilities Carly: yea Carly: youre an angel Ali: you're so cute Carly: its you Carly: my parents came back Carly: gonna have to run Ali: oh no i am en route Ali: where you going boo Carly: i'll catch you and we can find somewhere theyre not Carly: ha church Carly: can you eat there cuz im not looking to die for jesus Ali: yeah for sure, not in the pews like its the cinema, like Ali: can go park if you wanna Ali: or up the mountain if you can hack it, like Carly: youre so smart Carly: like your mouth Carly: but yea Carly: date time Ali: awh yeah Ali: this picnic ain't goals i'm so sorry babe Ali: least the weather's looking up Carly: idc Carly: get to be w my boo Ali: 😍 Carly: i look crazy Carly: havent got dressed faster w out getting fucked before since idc Carly: idk Ali: i like crazy Ali: and beside me you'll probs look totally normal 😉 Carly: you look hot every day baby Carly: facts Ali: all these compliments got me feeling 🔥 obvs Carly: thats how i want it Ali: gonna have you flying high too Ali: top of the world, baby Carly: aw Carly: whats in the food like Ali: 😂 Ali: just faith n trust n pixiedust, of course Carly: you can snort pixiedust yea? Carly: k Ali: you gon' be mad when i've got nothing but sandwiches and half a donut Carly: nah Carly: cant be mad at you Carly: too cute Ali: and donuts are life Carly: true

[punkscowardschampions]

Rio & Buster

Rio: didn't know you had mates who weren't total twats, McKenna Rio: cheers though, was alright, actually Buster: You and me both, babe Buster: Don't waste your time telling me though, I'm sure he'll love it when you add more praise to his review Rio: Let's not go crazy with the self-indulgent gold star giving yet Rio: Though I know you posh boys love that unwarranted gratification 👌🍆 Buster: You already did from what I heard Buster: And yeah, he did love it by all accounts Rio: 🙄 Like he's never been to confession Rio: Awks Buster: No need now Buster: It's well off his chest Rio: Generous of you to be that sounding board Buster: Didn't give me a choice Rio: Gotta take that up with him, not me, babe Rio: can only ask I get my reviews back firsthand, like Buster: Been there, done that, cheers Rio: can imagine how that went Rio: take it it ain't same time next week like Buster: Ask him Buster: He's bound to be up for another crack at you Rio: Will do Rio: if he's done chatting to you, like Buster: He is Buster: Made sure of that Rio: Charming as always Rio: Oh, you boys Rio: just ask him out next time, it's obvs what you really wanted Buster: Not a homewrecker either, like Buster: Obviously more of your type than mine, babe Rio: Well, you saw him first, claim that dibs, babe Rio: I said he wasn't a total twat, if that counts as a ringing endorsement, then I worry for ya, boy 😂 Rio: Soz you wanted me to have a shit time and I made best with it 🤷 Buster: Whatever Rio: Moody Rio: Take it your date isn't down for round 2 Buster: Fuck off Buster: If I'm in a mood it's 'cause of that cunt telling me all about how up for it you were Buster: Nothing to do with her Rio: Alright Rio: But there ain't nothing I can do about that Rio: not like I told him to tell you Buster: I know Buster: You've already opened your legs for him now so it's done Rio: Shut up Buster: Too late to be touchy about it Buster: I told you not to fuck him Rio: And I told you you don't tell me what to do Rio: or not do Rio: and just 'cos he's running his mouth doesn't mean you can too Buster: I can do what I like Rio: Why do you like being a dick? Buster: Why do you like being a hoe? Rio: Feels good Buster: If that was true you'd pick your lads better Rio: How would you know Rio: know you've not actually fucked him yourself Buster: I have all the details I need and didn't ask for, remember Buster: And I know he's a pussy Rio: I'm so sure he saved his post-shag cry for you Buster: Shut up Buster: You're welcome for the 'feel good' and we're even so you can go Rio: Had nothing to do with you Buster: Fate was it? Buster: Christ Rio: Oh, piss off Buster: Gladly Rio: 👋 Rio: Grab a coffee forreal, you need the pick-me-up Buster: Such an expert on what I need Rio: Doesn't take a genius Buster: Lucky for you Rio: Whatever Rio: Least I know how to have a good time Buster: Yeah? Buster: When Buster: If last night's what you're leading with I almost feel bad for you Rio: Always Rio: Believe it or not, don't actually need you to organise my social life Buster: Nah, just bail you out when it goes to shit Rio: Even if that were close to the normal Rio: we're even now Rio: so you can't be bitter about that anymore Buster: I ain't Rio: What are you then? Buster: Right now, I'm fed up Rio: Why? Buster: You'd usually reckon you know Buster: Losing your touch? Rio: Nah, but you know, you're meant to let people talk their way to the solution Rio: not hand it to 'em Rio: #psych101 baby Buster: Says you Buster: I got these cunts in my ears talking and talking, sick of it Buster: My solution is gonna be to throw their arses out in a minute like Rio: You already know you need better friends Rio: just French exit for now Buster: And where are you that's so fucking desirable? Rio: Nowhere yet Rio: Some overpriced bar Rio: it's actually criminal Buster: So take your own advice before giving it to me Rio: go where? Rio: can't be arsed getting a room so I'm staying out 'til I go back home Buster: Don't be stupid Buster: There's loads of space here Rio: You're alright Rio: Like you said, your shit friends are there Rio: I'll see where the night takes me Buster: And I also said I'm sick of them Buster: But fine Buster: Come out with me. Show me that fun you're always having apparently Rio: Alright Rio: [Sends location] Buster: I'm not bringing your boyfriend Buster: If you want him, ask him yourself Rio: Like I said, let's calm down Rio: sounds like he's having a better time bragging than repeating and idc Buster: Yeah Buster: I'll be there in like 20 Buster: Think of somewhere better Rio: Way ahead of you Rio: Seriously, better pre-drink with these prices, boy Buster: Way ahead of you Buster: Behave and I'll sort you out with something to change the mood Rio: 😇 Buster: 😈 Buster: How hard do you wanna go? Rio: I better take the hardest Rio: you need to keep it fun and light over there 😜 Buster: I haven't left yet, I can change my mind Rio: Your mind's made up and we both know it Buster: You reckon? Rio: Know so Rio: But I'm down for whatever you bring Buster: You'll be regretting saying that when it's just me Rio: You reckon? Buster: You don't? Rio: Come find out Buster: On my way Rio: [One tense cockblock later] Rio: Well, no idea you and him were so serious about each other Buster: Shut up Rio: 😂 Rio: Bless Rio: Glad someone's checking up on you Buster: Besides you, like Buster: Stalking my feed Rio: Yeah, yeah Rio: message received, like Rio: never try and take their place again 😉 Buster: Is it? Rio: You tell me if I've got my wires crossed Buster: I don't need to tell you what you already know Rio: Worth a shot Buster: I know what it'd be worth Rio: You sure? Buster: Yeah Buster: Aren't you? Rio: Hmm Rio: Pretty sure Rio: Need a bit more convincing though Buster: Where are you now? Rio: [Airport selfie] Buster: What am I meant to do with that? Rio: You don't need the suggestion Rio: just saying Rio: 'til next time, McKenna Buster: Fuck's sake Rio: I know Rio: life's a bitch Rio: but work calls Rio: gotta get my account back in the black somehow after London prices Buster: Shouldn't have been so quick to ditch after one date, like Buster: Say what you like about that boy, he spends Rio: Can always get back in touch Rio: ask for his old man's deets, get me an ACTUAL daddy Buster: [Sends a photo of the lad and his dad] Buster: That's ended me Rio: 😷 Oh no Rio: Mr. Grey he ain't Rio: rather work at the shithole still Buster: Unlucky babe Buster: Plenty more rich old pervs in the postcode though, I'm sure Rio: Like you don't know Rio: giving me the naff deets Rio: c'mon Buster: I'm out as standard if I hear any old man's ride pull up in the drive Buster: Bad enough when they try and call me daddy I don't need to meet the actual for comparison Rio: 😂 Rio: That accent, just feel like you're getting shook down for pocket money or a new pony, right? Buster: Makes me miss your ends Rio: 🍀 Rio: no denying its a pantydropper of an accent Buster: Yeah Buster: Tempts me to show my face about Rio: Should Rio: much as you LOVE being the host with the most Buster: Might Rio: Why not Rio: Always some cunts Birthday, if you're looking for an excuse Buster: I don't reckon I need one Rio: Fair Rio: Not a total tourist Buster: Too right Buster: Proved myself many a time Rio: I mean Rio: Not getting away with it that easy Buster: Am I not? Rio: Definitely not Buster: I don't believe you Rio: We'll see if you come thru Buster: Reckon I need more convincing before I make the trip Buster: Dublin ain't that special, like Rio: Lies and slander, first of all 😏 don't let the fam catch you saying that, like Buster: They don't catch me doing anything, it's all good Rio: You better 🙏 they don't Rio: Me too when I work out how to convince you Buster: If you want me on my knees, only gotta ask Rio: Don't Buster: Just saying Rio: Well I'm JUST in public rn Rio: rude as always Buster: Well nobody's forcing you on that flight Rio: Only reality Buster: Fuck that Rio: Usually, I'd agree with ya Buster: Until next time then Rio: Yeah Buster: Safe travels, Cavante Rio: Mind how you go, McKenna

[punkscowardschampions]

Ronnie, Bronson, Charlie & Bea

Ronnie: I'm going on a run Ronnie: who wants? Bronson: My stash is depleted for some unknown reason 🤔 please stock me up Charlie: Ooh, new year new you babe? Charlie: couch to 5k is it aspirational af 😍 Bea: ✋ me Ronnie: fuck off i just dont need you pussies crying when you can't scav my gear Ronnie: what'll it be princess? the usual Charlie: c'mon, we've always shared everything, nothing is your own #carekidlife Bronson: Ha! That'll be why the lock on my door never sticks Bea: yep, not decided to get heavily into crack since we last spoke, just lots of amphetamines in any form you find 'em, tah, got exams coming up Ronnie: Shame Ronnie: reckon I'd like you more on the hard shit Charlie: just in case you missed the old place, man, giving you that nostalgia for when you had to padlock anything that wasn't bolted to the floor 😜 Bronson: Good times! 😀 Bea: Shame I'm not trying to be your type then, I guess Bea: soz darling, spoken for 💋 Charlie: Truly, missing that tenner a week pocket money, LUXURY! Ronnie: fucking am Ronnie: pissing jobcentre Bronson: I'll add it to your tab if you're desperate as Charlie: gotta learn to play their game, babe Charlie: not throw the board in a hissy Ronnie: 🖕 doss cunts Bea: catch me here fanning myself with sweet, sweet debt for future me to give a shit about Bronson: I'll wipe it out if you use some to keep me sweet Bea: sweet enough sugar 😘 Bea: but forreal, if you could manage that I would be your sugar mama for LIFE 🙏 Bronson: It's student loans not the feds Bronson: Easy peasy Bea: true, like all branches of the gov, pretty fucking useless Bea: but I'm an immigrant as far as they concerned so they treat me SO good 😋 Bronson: Same, but we can always stretch our hands out a little further Ronnie: To jack it and pat yourself on the back at the same time, yeah? Ronnie: calm it down Bronson: New year, new look too! Green looks ace with black 😄 Bea: Clearly do not have natural rhythm Ronnie, that's really not that difficult Bea: You're not a drummer, are you? 😕 Ronnie: get off my tits all of yous Ronnie: do you want gear or nah? Bronson: 🤐 Bea: I thought you'd already gone tbh Ronnie: not trying to score that weak gay shit Ronnie: hitting up a more reliable source like Charlie: rude, i'm RIGHT here Ronnie: are you even gay fitzy? always in my pussy lad Bronson: 😷 Bea: 🤢 Charlie: idk, ask ur man 💖 Ronnie: that'll be why me and Bron's dads did a bunk Bronson: Get yourself locked up at the same time just for the d, did you? Romantic Charlie: if the porn n the stereotypes n the rate of STIs are anything to go by...love is in the air always in cell block h Ronnie: princess'll have some handcuffs to get you on your way to that good loving Bea: 🚿🧠 anyone got any bleach? Bea: Charlie isn't worth the 💰 use cable ties, more authentic Bronson: 99 🚔 My fingers are on the button....Stop for the love of god Ronnie: Bron can help you out there Fitz Ronnie: 🤓 Bronson: Take that over a thicko label Charlie: Look, babe, know you wanna tie me down forever but do it yourself, don't involve the kid Charlie: 💍 diamond or no D, soz Ronnie: Bring a needle I'll snag a gem Bronson: Don't go there, C, I'm still riding the ear infection wave Bronson: It's been 84 years Ronnie: yeah cause you're a mong that can't turn an earring Bronson: In my defense I was a legit child Bea: nothing screams low-class like stabbing your friends for the bants Charlie: and i already scream homo loudly enough, don't need another reason to be hate crime-d, a thank you Bronson: If I didn't know you I'd guess bisexual Bronson: You can have that for free Charlie: what a smooth-talker! thanks babe 💖 Charlie: and if i didn't know you, i'd guess you were trying to see my dongle Bronson: Been there, repressed the trauma o that Ronnie: get a fucking room benders Charlie: why you being so homophobic when we all know how bad you want on princess? cliche stuck in the closet much Bea: shut up Ronnie: in your wet dreams Charles Ronnie: fuck off Charlie: oh the delicious tension Charlie: too much for either to bear Ronnie: I know where she's been Ronnie: fuck that Ronnie: like you wish you could gayboy Bronson: Wait, you fancy Fraze, Charlie? Ha Bea: Bron can you not encourage either of them Bea: thanks Bronson: Sorry my mind's just blown I thought he was out of his straight boy phase Charlie: What? Its a compliment for you, he's adorable, why else would you be with him? Ronnie: they're both annoying cunts Ronnie: match made Charlie: and never out of that phase, bro 😍 #daddyissues Bea: get his name out of your mouth bitch Ronnie: oi get your mouth off his dick Fitzgerald you heard her Ronnie: princess is raging like Ronnie: when your mans a slag and youre a prude Bea: As if Bea: Only one McKenna fucked up to go near you Bea: #singletear Charlie: Children, enough Ronnie: Bron do that final 9 she's going off 😂 Bronson: Walking away Bea: know you're hard up but as per we're all funding you getting your rocks off so run along and do it, no need to bore me trying to get your kicks Ronnie: know youre a snobby cunt but I don't work for you Bea: you don't work for anyone, not even JC gonna fund your lack of a life Ronnie: 🖕 mad cause I don't need reddies to fund myself Bea: yeah fuming Bea: if only I'd have thought of selling my body, wouldn't even NEED to be at cambs rn omg Ronnie: nailed it Bea: 😂 Bea: whodathunkit Bea: talking to the cure for cancer stuck inside a waster here Bea: and I'm the snob, okay Ronnie: fucking hell Ronnie: devvo like Bea: We can tell Bea: you don't need to shout about it, you've got the energy of a walking wasteland Ronnie: can't wait until you take some more speed and get more smug Bea: Right? Bea: Must sting, better only getting better Bea: why don't you get something to numb the pain- Ronnie: let you know how it feels when the lads come up Bronson: A rare compliment, you hitting it already? Ronnie: you'll have your share calm the fuck down Charlie: i don't want any, i'm busy Charlie: glad you all noted my silence, feel so listened to usually! hmpf Ronnie: so now you're a little bitch too Ronnie: fuck's sake Bronson: PARTY TIME, am I right? Really in the mood now thanks everyone Charlie: who's in who's pussy, dollface? Charlie: keep your shirt on, Bro 😂 got enough with the two angry feminists here Charlie: I've got previous plans, if you're really so hurt, you can save me some, no? Whaddya mean that'd hurt more? 😏 Bea: you're alright, I personally rather you weren't there, suits me 😘 Bronson: Shirts already off, too late 😜 Bea: Standard 👌 Charlie: you big man whore Charlie: when i'm not around to be predatory, too, tuttut Bronson: I'd wilt under your stare, you know you aren't missing out Charlie: our beautiful wallflower Charlie: I bagsy being a red rose, lil trashy but iconic Bronson: Thorn in our sides Bronson: accepted Bea: Nice one, babe Bea: i'll be an orchid, because i'm beautiful, ornamental and high-maintenance Bea: getting in there before any of you fucks can Charlie: though your silence IS noted, wonwon Charlie: don't be cross at me 😘 Ronnie: fuck off Ronnie: you're not the only one who's busy Ronnie: got a dick in my mouth too like Charlie: such a skilled multitasker Charlie: teach me your ways Bronson: in private please Bronson: not a lesson I want to learn Bea: we're not living in that teen movie Ronnie: On my way Bea: 👍 getting cash out, meet you there Bronson: Doors on the latch

Bea: Morning sweetness 😴 Bea: manage to recover your good vibe/night? Bronson: is it? 😪 Bronson: Until now it wasn't too bad Bronson: Do you get to say the same or is it pure suffering? Bea: Wow, when you hit bae up with that morning text and he's like day=ruined 😰 thought we was forever 😉 Bea: Decided to get off with someone around the same time I lost track of yous, so it was fucking awful, don't tell me you coulda told me that Bronson: It's only the comedown I wanna dump you're welcome to come and nap 💗 Bronson: Not to be that know it all Bea: Molly's such a cruel, cruel mistress, she wants you to miss her when she's gone 💁 Bea: Poor bubba, better than waking up next to that pushy bitch from last night though, Jesus, what was her damage? Bea: I reckon he'd actually gone out and had his drunken kebab and THEN PAID TO GET BACK IN Bea: No sir, not alright Bea: Why do I bother? Bronson: But I'm shamelessly smitten, only girl for besides present company like Bronson: Whatever it is she's not the first or last sufferer Bronson: Thanks for the bail out and sorry I wasn't there to do the same with kebab Kev Bea: N'awwh 💞 glad I hold more appeal than Tina, don't need to be going down that route Bea: It's an epidemic! Basic bitches who can't get a man willing, yeah take that out on innocent onlookers who ain't buying and talk about how your ex ain't shit for being a creepy letch Bea: We see you sweets 💅 Bea: Any time, even if you weren't there to take that donner breath bullet Bea: I'd never ask that of anyone, even Ronnie, though she'd brag about not being arsed, I'm sure 😂 Bronson: Next time I'll carry gum and throw it at whoever you deem worthy Bronson: Give me the nod Bronson: It was all over her socials like we had a good night together until I got there first Bronson: Rather take out Tina and all her mates Bea: as if you don't already Bea: if only little miss would-be-rapist knew that strong jawline was from gurning up a storm 😉 Bea: not so sexy now Bronson: there's nothing in my pockets I'm just pleased to see you Bronson: Seriously though, some of those selfies had to go for that unflattering reason alone taking into account none of her other antics Bronson: I looked a state Bea: 😂 not fallen for that one before but i'll make an exception for you boo Bea: catch me in my duvet cocoon, please don't look at me 'cos same Bea: I dread to think Bea: kept off my accounts for that reason and many more, some of us have reputations to uphold, skank Bronson: want me to check Bronson: clean up the carnage Bronson: Then brunch, your treat Bea: please Bea: roleplay my IT bitch and I'll be feeling my boss best in time for a liquid lunch Bea: will have to damage control my face first, enjoy watching me lovingly whilst I turn a -2 to an 11 Bronson: Never get bored of staring at you, you know that Bronson: Make my hair great again Bronson: Thanks Bea: when you shoulda been Trump's campaign manager 😕 Bea: sort the weave, clean up that twitter Bea: what a wonderful world it coulda been Bronson: Last night proves I can't stop him pussy grabbing Bronson: Need you for that one Bea: This pussy bites back 😼 Bea: its not your fault, girls like that, if you tell her to fuck off, and rightly so, it'd be made like YOU were being a prick to her Bea: gotta bullshit these hoes sometimes, tis the only way Bronson: Or playing hard to get...they fire that one at me loads Bronson: 😦 Bea: 🤢 gross Bea: got that one myself a fair few times, when I'm not being accused of being a prude by Ronaldo, hilariously Bea: People are the worst Bea: 'cept us Bronson: It's only because she likes you Bronson: Flattering, isn't it? Bronson: Being called broken is my fave Bronson: "Who hurt you?" You are right now, fuck off before you get a slap yourself to feel the pain of Bea: Wouldn't that just be the perfect solution in their simplistic little world? If only Bea: Save myself the feelings of disgust not brought on by kebab breath Bea: Though, if you think that that's love coming from Ron, then you do have an answer to their riddle right there, not real but the masses'll take one look at her and buy it 😜 Bronson: No arguments here Bronson: Your socials are sparkling now so that's real comfort to take Bea: 💖 yay Bea: the world never need know Bea: as long as I didn't drunk dial or text Fraze, this day is looking up, tah babes Bronson: Not to be a know it all again so quick Bronson: but I'm going to go ahead and guess the answer to that one Bea: BITCH DON'T KILL MY VIBE Bea: I'm sure I'd have angry ranting in my inbox if I had Bea: or a passive indirect on the socials, come across one perchance smartiepants? Bronson: Might've Bronson: I'll spare you Bea: Noooooooooooooooooooo Bea: Coulda had it all Bea: Really sours my Bloody Mary Bea: Fuck sake, now he's going to think I FUCKED kebab kev and enjoyed it meanwhile I sit here virginal and scrubbing my mouth out with soap Bea: How's this game fair again, please remind me Bronson: It isn't Bronson: But I can't tell you to stop playing Bronson: All yours Bea: you're meant to be a superwhizkid Bea: can't you think up a strategy so I win Bronson: Thinking cap is on Bronson: Because my hair still looks shit as much as Bea: I'll fix your barnet Bea: Between you and Charlie, honestly Bea: Never known boys like it 😂 Bea: blatant lie, have you seen how particular Fraze is but he doesn't really have much hair to be stylin' so Bronson: 👴 awkward Bea: you fool Bea: not like that 😂 Bea: though I'll keep it in my backpocket for when we inevitably row later Bea: #malepatternbaldnessBITCH Bronson: Freebie to kick your day off right again Bea: if you refuse to tell me what to do, could you use your skillz for good at least and fucking disable my phone when i'm fucked Bronson: Last time I tried you tried to fight me like Bea: Look, I didn't say it was a task for the fainthearted 😉 Bea: and yes, you would be the first to succeed too Bea: but if anyone can, its my man 😘 Bronson: Ego boost before eggs Bronson: Whoa Bronson: Today is looking up Bea: Gotta keep you sweet with all the bitching I'll no doubt do at brunch Bea: such a Carrie move, like no one cares bitch, write it in your column or books or...what did she even write? Or was she just monologuing at her computer, like all been there babe but don't act like its buying you all that designer Bronson: Her real true love was that laptop Bronson: Solved it Bea: 😲 Bea: but Mr. Big Bea: clue in the name Bronson: Could be his wallet Bronson: explain the designer gear Bea: Exactly Bea: Just my type Bronson: I'd go in for it if I can spend and send him the receipts Bea: you must be aware there are websites for that Bea: get on it boy Bronson: It all gets too sexual for my tastes Bea: set out boundaries Bea: different strokes for different folks Bea: i'm SURE there's a millionaire out there that just wants to chat Bronson: 🤔 There's enough fighting off advances in the club Bronson: Shelving that until millionaires become good people Bea: not bad people by default Bea: just a bad system they profit from more than you Bronson: Getting deep in here Bronson: Truth though Bea: real talk take #2 Bea: where do you think charlie was last night? and who or what was he doing? Bronson: Good questions that I have no answer to Bronson: If he had a job we'd all know Bea: I need to know, suspense is killing me Bea: I didn't think anything beat drugs in his book Bea: somewhat encouraging? Bronson: You could ask but I doubt you'd get far enough into the real Bronson: It is Bronson: Boy's growing up? Bea: Full of the #bants them two Bronson: Since day 1 Bronson: I'm coming to get you, Barbara Bronson: Ready yourself Bea: *falls over gravestones like a dumb bitch* Bea: i'm good to go and looking fly Bronson: I'll do the coded knock Bronson: Made up rn Bea: Helpful Bronson: That's my thing Bronson: Soon, my love, soon

[punkscowardschampions]

Jimmy & Janis

Jimmy: 💕 Janis: feeling the love 'cos corporate making ya, hey? Janis: how many holiday drinks you made today Jimmy: feels like billions Jimmy: not the kinda wrist action to be #buzzing about Janis: here's hoping you working commission lad Janis: is any? 🤔 #hotdatewithjane Jimmy: Tam's been in and out all day earning you those kicks you desire Jimmy: #notsosecretadmirer Jimmy: can't stay away on this special day Janis: Christ, you'd think she wouldn't wanna be seen DEAD outside her house, single, on this most sacred day Janis: gotta be stringing her along with lingering just a little too long when handing over the caffeine, good job babe 👏 Janis: think Grace is lowkey in hiding Janis: too late to even frantically swipe right on tinder now ladies Jimmy: Tell her Bobby'll be round Jimmy: He would if date night wasn't past his bedtime like Janis: 😂 bless Janis: all got our cross to bear, kid Janis: can't get my date out without a leash and promises of treats 🤷 Jimmy: Speaking of bitches, I seen Mia's timed her latest for the stockholm syndrome to kick in right on time Janis: look, i know you're bitter 'cos i've chucked you for better but don't bad mouth the bae, ok? Janis: forreal tho, they have schedules, like clockwork Janis: a new man for every occasion, this one won't last 'til her bday Jimmy: Keeping my hands where Tams can't see or cuff 'em Janis: 😏 tmi Janis: and unhygienic to boot, you serve lattes with those hands Jimmy: filthy 🧠 Jimmy: it's the company you keep Jimmy: Twix's gone from trying to shit in my dad's shoes to humping 'em Janis: whoa now, i didn't teach her that Janis: but think about it, from a scatological foot fetish to just a bit of vanilla pre-teen humping of inanimate objects Janis: it IS a step in the right direction Jimmy: But you are about treating 'em mean to keep 'em keen Janis: Your kicks are safe, dun' worry Janis: if she's taught me anything, not the way into the good books 😇 Jimmy: If you wanna aim for my work shoes I won't complain Jimmy: A day off is a day off Jimmy: Warn me first though, unless you're into those kind of surprises Janis: Best not to be seen with each other today Janis: don't wanna give everyone the wrong idea Janis: but nice try, you'll have to stick to burning yaself and the like if you wanna bunk Jimmy: Tammy's bound to help me with that Jimmy: #likeagiraffeonice Janis: She's beauty, she's graces Janis: wants you to cum all over her face Jimmy: fingers crossed she'll melt mine off first Jimmy: Better with that Janis: fair Janis: no way you've got the reach Jimmy: 💕 #whenbaebelievesinyou Janis: what, you want me to offer help with target practice? Janis: nice try dickhead 😜 Jimmy: Romance isn't dead there's the proof Jimmy: What are you doing today, aside from belly rubs for the bae Janis: gotta do something, don't I? feel bad like Janis: slayed the gift game and I really phoned it in so obvs gotta give out those sexual favours Janis: nowt though, trying to avoid seeing all the lovey-dovey couples making me wanna vom Janis: letting Tam work her magic in peace 😘 welcome like Jimmy: 💔🐶🎻 Jimmy: Making drinks with my eyes closed 'cause same Jimmy: Crack on Tam #tallgirlsneedlovetoo Janis: any barista will do 🎶 Janis: wanna hang when the madness is over Jimmy: The way this queue is going there isn't gonna be goodies left to bring you Jimmy: But I'm sweet enough😎 Jimmy: So yeah Janis: Bummer Janis: guess I can't kick you outta bed for that alone Janis: let you tot up negatives throughout the day, standard Jimmy: Got a pen behind my ear Jimmy: Come at me Janis: never could resist a challenge Janis: 🙄 walked into that one Janis: can we do something not shit Janis: don't need to see you slurping down spaghetti lady and the tramp stylee Jimmy: 💔 I'll shoo away all the strays I've gathered Jimmy: Only one dog for you like Jimmy: But of course that's how we stay goals Jimmy: any old shit won't do 💪🏆 Janis: 🎻 Janis: okay good Janis: play your cards right and get it right Janis: i'll spring for the motel 😉 Jimmy: Challenge accepted Janis: for once i'll be rooting for you Janis: my parents are unbearable at the best of times Janis: 🤢 Janis: actually cannot deal Jimmy: My dad and his girlfriend are still early days enough that they can bear to be in the same room Jimmy: I won't fail Janis: oh the honeymoon period Janis: disgusting Janis: thank god we got that out of the way with a fake relationship so you know my true feelings 😏 Jimmy: yeah thanks mate Jimmy: 👍 Janis: welcome, buddy o' pal o' mine Jimmy: Done Jimmy: I've worked it out Janis: taking a particularly difficult shit? Janis: again, don't need these intimate updates honey Janis: not #goals Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: No, what's goals is what we're gonna do, babe 😏 Jimmy: Keeping you outta the house 'til there's no cringe factor left Janis: Ahh Janis: colour me intrigued Jimothy Janis: what's the dress code? Jimmy: 🤔 Jimmy: Nothing Tam would be seen dead in Janis: Alright, no body con that shows all my worst bits, gotcha Janis: do I get ANY clues? Curious 🙀 right here Jimmy: You might just make yourself a new bae Jimmy: But pace yourself mate Janis: 😳 Janis: i don't own any PVC clothing, you know that, yeah? Jimmy: I do now 🎻 Janis: 😂 can literally hear Gracie in my head asking me what i'm like rn Janis: letting ya man down on vday Janis: honestly Jimmy: when one twin's a giver and the other's a taker 😂 Janis: tbf, we BOTH told you you'd got the wrong one but Janis: cloth ears you Jimmy: Down for the challenge Jimmy: Too late to not be a stubborn dickhead, me Janis: looks like we're both stuck then, lad Jimmy: there's that #realtalk mate Janis: can't say we didn't both give it a fair go Janis: #longdistanceloveinskerries #teenagerunaway Jimmy: You'll always have Twix 💕 Janis: gotta have someone to rely on init Jimmy: #tea Janis: #scaldedagain #jobhazard Jimmy: [Sends a selfie of an actual burn/on the job hazard] Jimmy: Stuff of fantasies that Janis: Poor baby! Has Tam not offered to 💋 it better? Janis: #slacking Jimmy: She's got her 👀 a bit lower down Jimmy: I'm just a piece of 🍖 Jimmy: The real hazard Janis: start a # about it Janis: 'cos can't blame her Janis: part of the problem, truly Jimmy: Will do Janis: being all distracting there with your apron and that Janis: asking for it Jimmy: I thought it was the shoes Jimmy: Sexy from head to toe like Jimmy: 🐶💗 Janis: 😋 something certainly got tongues n tails wagging Jimmy: 😎 Jimmy: The company I keep, I think 😉 Janis: valid, the bitches love me 😍 Jimmy: Alright, save it for the 'gram Jimmy: #humblebrag Janis: Twix is a busy lady, only got you scheduled in so far Janis: guess the fans will have to make do with your mug 😜 Jimmy: unlucky lads and lasses Janis: they love it Janis: 'til some other cunt is unlucky enough to be enrolled in our school, you're gonna stay flavour of the month 🍦 Jimmy: 💪🥇 Janis: meanwhile, i gotta wait 'til the next fam scandal 'til I'm relevant again Janis: such is life Janis: not that its ever THAT long 🙄 Jimmy: Whip up some fake drama for you to hide in if you want Jimmy: Crack 'em out with the lattes Janis: I don't doubt you're capable Janis: just getting over sinkgate 😏 Mr. Lucas never will 😉 Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: He's one of the only dickheads who hasn't been in today Jimmy: Still time 🤞 Janis: think a milky earl grey is his shout Janis: get it ready, really impress him Janis: more than you did, obvs Jimmy: The coffee breath and forehead vein says espresso though 🤔 Jimmy: Man o mystery Janis: 🤤 Janis: so hot Jimmy: More competition is it? Jimmy: 💔🎻 Janis: Using you as a ploy to get him hot under that starched collar all along Janis: soz babes 😘 Jimmy: I should've known your real goal was to get under that lumpy jumper Janis: 😂 Janis: know he's got the goods under it Jimmy: Can't fight the feeling Janis: s'a real shame the hottest female teacher we've got is that TA with the wonky fringe and clompy shoes Janis: who you got your sights set on next? Jimmy: always been about a wonky fringe meself Jimmy: Clompy shoes are a massive bonus when Twix is being a mad bitch underfoot too like Janis: draw the line there pal Janis: gotta get the dog in the divorce like Janis: not letting that hipster bitch anywhere near Jimmy: 🥊 Jimmy: going down swinging Janis: if she doesn't scream cat lady as is, she's defs into weird pets like fucking Janis: stick insects Janis: hope you're soooo happy together like 🖕 not even mad Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: nice to have your blessing, mate Jimmy: be my best man on the day Janis: literally fuck off Janis: only just got rid of the lesbian rumours and you wanna put me in a suit WHILST friendzoning me Janis: nah 😤 Jimmy: spoilsport Jimmy: found a challenge she won't accept Janis: only way i'm showing up is if you invite all your exes and put us on a table so we can chat mad shit on you Janis: be a man about it, boy Jimmy: card table at the back, couple of chairs so you can place your bets 👍 Janis: more like it Janis: hook up with your actual best man Janis: pure spite and alcohol fuelling me Jimmy: It'd probs be Cass so best not Jimmy: no good for the rep Janis: 😡 Janis: same tho, if i ever got hitched (ignoring the unlikeliness of that) i'd have to hit up the sibs for those bridesmaids and ting Janis: least my fam is good for numbers if not company like Jimmy: Grace has used her twin senses and is moodboarding somewhere rn Jimmy: Unlucky Janis: 🤢 don't Janis: vietnam flashbacks rn Janis: you know how many fake weddings of hers i've attended Jimmy: I can imagine Jimmy: And am Jimmy: Cute 😂 Janis: Fuck off Janis: shame your dad don't wanna be bffs Janis: can't hit him up for embarrassing pics and stories to use against you Jimmy: Another win to my name Janis: 🖕 Janis: sincerely hope you get a beverage thrown in ur face Jimmy: 💕 Janis: Wish you'da got me some earplugs Jimmy: Come on over mate, I've got loads Jimmy: #whenyourdadisdating Janis: literally Janis: at least you know its the same woman to avoid when she runs to the bog to clean herself up Janis: Pablo already on 2nd of the day Janis: Need a way to let 'em know Jimmy: Gotta have a sleepover with your real bae Jimmy: Twix'll sort 'em Jimmy: Sticking her nose in, literally like Janis: Oh that sweet curious girl Janis: some things she never need see 🙈 Jimmy: #nosybitchproblems Janis: getting dirt on enemy #1 anyway she can Janis: those bribe bones coming her way Jimmy: Happy v-day to her Janis: Maybe you and wonky fringe can have a fuck-off Janis: bet she's a right goer when you get the hair down and glasses off like Jimmy: Invite you and Mr Lucas for the post shag debrief Jimmy: Give you a /10 Janis: Naturally Janis: so curious to know how I rank 😒 Jimmy: Always a 10 with Twix Janis: 🙌 Janis: that'll help with the rep Jimmy: Me and Killer'll take the heat off with our new relationship shine Janis: yeah it loves you Janis: daft fucking dog Jimmy: Pity I can't turn the 💕 into 💰 Jimmy: Loads of lattes no will to keep slinging 'em Janis: Looking for a career change? Janis: fame getting too real? Jimmy: Got me looking like a deer in the headlights Jimmy: Tammy's livid Jimmy: There can only be one Janis: 'bout to be a bloodbath in CG Jimmy: Place your bets, mate Janis: hmm Janis: Tams got the reach like but reckon she's mostly talk n neck Janis: nan's not been in has she? 😉 Jimmy: She's serving me that 💔 while I crane my own neck looking out for her all day long Jimmy: no sign yet Janis: Gutted Janis: even she's feeling the lurve today Janis: literally no place to go Janis: so tragic Jimmy: About to eat my feelings like a proper flat white squad member Jimmy: Speaking of feeling that l.u.r.v.e did you hear how many cards Cass got sent? Jimmy: 7 Janis: WHAT Janis: get it gurl but also fuck off lads she's too lil Jimmy: walking about like its nowt Jimmy: 😎 Janis: thank god Janis: no one needs that ego boost Janis: fuming tbh Jimmy: Bobs made one at school Jimmy: guess who for Janis: Aww, bless him Janis: she does need that boost Janis: he gonna hand-deliver? Jimmy: He's insisting Jimmy: So be about Jimmy: You got one too Jimmy: moving in on my lass Janis: we in, have to kick the empty ice cream cartons out the way like but find us in front of bridget jones or similar Janis: i'm honoured like 😊 Jimmy: Yours is bigger but hers has more glitter Jimmy: Can't call a winner Janis: size matters Janis: #facts Janis: soz Gracie, gotta fight you or you'll get too comfy Jimmy: Just don't let her vlog it Jimmy: Don't need porno style #s going viral Janis: MY TWIN ATTACKED ME!?!?!?! (NOT CLICKBAIT) Jimmy: Haters, on this sacred day Jimmy: #savage Janis: Glad to keep her in #content Janis: who's the real ⭐ baby Jimmy: 🤩 Jimmy: Better than 💝 chocs Janis: the calories! 😱 Jimmy: who needs food when you can exist on ☕ and even hotter goss 💋 Janis: diet of champions that 🙄 Janis: mia be bullshitting them that she doesn't run on sheer cuntiness Jimmy: Mia? A bullshitter? 😲 Jimmy: Nope Janis: awks 😕 Janis: did you think you was forever? Jimmy: she was my fucking cinnamon apple Janis: 😂 Janis: at least i've got an excuse to fight her again Janis: try not to get in the way this time Jimmy: Will do Jimmy: 2nd rule of fight club, get out the way dickhead Janis: brad pitt in that film Janis: mwah 💋👌 Jimmy: Alright Jimmy: I got no retort because Helena, not the one like Janis: crazy bitch not your type, eh? Janis: think the masses would have to disagree 😏 Jimmy: Start a # or I'm not listening, sorry everyone Janis: he's a modern man Jimmy: 💪😎 Janis: wonder if anyone will get pregnant tonight Janis: wanna make a bet? Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: I'll put today's wage on it Jimmy: No tips Jimmy: Need them for our big 💕 plans Janis: alright, you're on Janis: here's hoping its only the tip for all the other lads like Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: Walked into that one Janis: 💁 Janis: shame we're not a hardcore catholic school #upthebuttforjesus Jimmy: I'd have to pray meself if I'd made a bet under them conditions Janis: what can i say? just like me, showing faith in our peers Janis: ur so negative, babe Janis: like dem tests 🤞 Jimmy: don't need to be an optimist to wait for those positives Janis: we'll see Jimmy: what to I get when I win this one Jimmy: quite a streak now babe 😏 Janis: 😣 Janis: on the off chance you manage to scrape a win Janis: what do you want? Jimmy: 🤔 Jimmy: Escape route for longer than a night for starters Jimmy: Lovebirds doing my head in Jimmy: I'm thinking a weekend break that isn't #cursed like Janis: Always down for running Janis: up for it not being away from you this time 😉 Janis: bringing the kiddos or? Jimmy: Depends if they kick off Jimmy: Got time to work on bribes Jimmy: Dad's Valerie might wanna play happy families 😒 Janis: 😬 Janis: that'll be fun Janis: can't have you dealing with that Janis: at least their tales of woe whilst you were gone will be packed with that #scandal and #drama Jimmy: might be easier to take 'em amount of SOS's we'd get Jimmy: Cass blowing up both our phones before we're out the door Jimmy: fuck knows Janis: Eithers cool Janis: just leave the hardcore whips n chains at home like Jimmy: Damn Jimmy: Alright done Jimmy: If we stick 'em on their own does that make us the mccanns Janis: not if we don't drug 'em Janis: stick to sweets and other such bribes and we'll be alright Jimmy: Gonna be enough of a plan getting there without adding a murder cover up Janis: honestly Janis: not on the agenda Janis: not a nice pretty white doctor like, never getting away with it Jimmy: not the 💕 american films'd have you believe either I reckon Jimmy: Surrounded by a cloud of smoke already cheers don't need a hail of bullets Janis: yeah if #blacklivesmatter taught us anything Janis: not the ideal way to spend a weekend Janis: also, still creasing at her name Janis: such middle aged hot piece of ass vibes Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: definitely can't promise you any of that Jimmy: but if you win, I'll 🚭 and hopefully run like less of a middle aged dickhead with a dad bod Jimmy: less of an evidence trail an' all Jimmy: win win Janis: whoa, that's awful big talk from the resident chimney Janis: you are sure you're gonna win 😉 Janis: but i accept the full Ts and Cs Janis: you should train with me Janis: not just an excuse to 👀 the dad bod Jimmy: Deal done then Jimmy: Trying to see me in my short shorts Jimmy: You'll have to catch me first like Janis: wouldn't even be fair to make it a competition like Jimmy: If you're too shit scared, mate Janis: just curious why you wanna lose so bad Janis: thinking you might love what punishment i have in mind? Jimmy: Wondering what it feels like 'cause it never happens Jimmy: You seem to be about it with all your repeats Janis: I'm going to enjoy making you suffer Jimmy: 😏 Jimmy: Gonna start a club with Mr Lucas? Janis: any time i get to spend with him like Janis: not like I wanna think up new cruel and unusual ways to get you but Janis: needs must Jimmy: 💕 cute Jimmy: I'd tell him to get his 🎻 out but we know what those hands are busy doing Janis: eurgh 😂 too far Janis: my 'rents reckon he's an actual predator, like, there are stories Janis: do not wanna commit so hard to this bit that I become his next victim forreal Jimmy: Not gonna happen babe 💪😎🐶 Jimmy: Squad got you covered Janis: My heroes 😍 Jimmy: If Twix isn't up to it my bae'll come through Jimmy: Named for it literally Janis: Reckon that was the idea Janis: or they were being ironic with it Janis: #sojokes Jimmy: either way I'll knock him out before its a drama Jimmy: as long as you don't get in my way naturally Janis: don't worry, got the sense I was born with 😜 Janis: dickhead Jimmy: Lucky you were born with it Jimmy: Some of us have neither Janis: 🎻 Janis: so what part of pretty woman you looking to recreate this time Janis: what's your artistic vision? 😏 Jimmy: I haven't seen it Jimmy: Bound to be an aesthetic montage though, isn't there? Janis: don't let my sister hear you Janis: roped into GIRLS NIGHT! before you know it Jimmy: Get the popcorn in Gracie, mine's salted Jimmy: Shout you a diet something if you keep the noise down, hun Janis: #romanticvdaynightplans Janis: i get why she got confused, you have #boundaryissues mate 😂 Jimmy: Living up to that dating a twin stereotype Jimmy: The people in my comment section DEMAND it, alright? Jimmy: #gottagiveemwhattheywant Janis: Nah, bitch, you can only play that if we're identical Janis: its not like whoops thought it was u Janis: on ANY level 😤 Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: Oh shit the boss is the embodiment of that emoji Jimmy: Yours not mine Jimmy: Gonna have to get a room Jimmy: Ban him, that's not how I'm earning employee of the month perks, sorry lad Janis: Convenient 😒 Janis: lemme catch u in her inbox boi 🥊 Janis: jk, get to work slacker, catch you in a mo Jimmy: 🐊 Jimmy: In a bit 💕 Janis: 🖤