#advantage of ebooks

[ebookselibrary]

Advantages of Interactive Ebooks In Education

[bucephaly]

Ive gotten four new books in the last 2 days, when I was already in the middle of reading 2 and I still have like 2 or 3 others I had gotten before I havent touched

Whoops

[thetransfemininereview]

Wishing everyone I know a very “go take advantage of the free Haymarket books about liberation movements deal” right now:

[svetaofbelinsk]

I know that a lot of people probably won't see this, but I've been thinking about it a lot lately, so I thought I'd say something.

Libby should be your new best friend.

This app is an incredible resource for everyone (at least in the US, I don't know if other countries have similar programs). It provides direct access to digital resources offered by practically every library in the US. These resources include:

eBooks

Digital magazines

Audiobooks

Movies (this is actually through a different app called Kanopy, but there is a link to it through Libby)

There is a wealth of topics included in these resources, and it is completely free.

The only things you need to access this are a device that can use the app itself and a library card.

I know that I'm biased because my Master's is in Library and Information Science, but libraries have been an invaluable resource ever since they were established, and they will continue to be valuable resources in the coming years. So please, take advantage of these incredible free resources.

[aaronstveit]

so you want to read more this year!

i answered an ask about this recently, but i thought i would make a post about it so i could (hopefully) be a bit more clear and helpful. i specifically wanna help people who used to read a lot, but have fallen off for a while now. obviously everyone is different, but i hope at least a few of these tips can help you.

let yourself read slowly. you don't have to speedrun every book you read; in fact, it's usually better if you don't. forget the way that you used to race through books when you were younger. let yourself take time with them now. especially if you haven't read much lately, it's going to take you longer to read now than it used to. and that's okay! a lot of stories are better when they are experienced slowly, so you can absorb them more.

stop viewing reading as a competition. you aren't trying to win a pizza party or special field trip now, so there is no need to compete with other readers. so what if someone else read 10 books in the time it took you to read 1? other readers have nothing to do with you. the only person you should be "competing with" is yourself.

that said, setting goals and challenges for yourself can be a life-changer. i'm not just talking about a goodreads goal, although setting a numerical goal is often helpful. but i mean setting more broad goals, like reading more books of certain genres, or more books by authors of color. setting goals without specified quantities can help you because it's not a pass-fail situation, it's just a personal challenge. there are also all sorts of reading challenges you can try, like reading a book for every letter of the alphabet. you can find any sort of reading challenge on the internet; the storygraph has a whole section dedicated to challenges, both site-run and user-run. you can even create your own! popsugar also runs a very popular year-long reading challenge.

experiment with book formats. physical books, e-books, and audiobooks allow several different formats for people to try out! figuring out which formats work best for you help you to enjoy reading and gain more from the experience. don't listen to people who say audiobooks aren't "reading." if you enjoy audiobooks, listen to them! the only person you have to answer to is yourself.

experiment with different genres. even if you think you know exactly what genres you like and don't like, try branching out and trying books outside of your comfort zone, especially if you haven't read a lot lately. you never know when your tastes might change!

don't be afraid to DNF or pause a book. the thing about reading as a hobby is that it's supposed to be fun. yes, you should read books that challenge you, but this doesn't mean you have to make it to the end of every book. if you're hating a book, if you dread picking it up, if it bores you: just quit. that way, you can find a book you actually enjoy to read. trying to force your way through a book you're hating just usually makes you read less in the long run.

utilize your public library if you have one. this one always feels obvious, and yet people always seem to forget it. libraries exist for a reason! a lot of libraries have apps where you can check out e-books and audiobooks, so definitely use those if you have them. if you want to read a physical copy of a book that your library doesn't have, you can probably request an interlibrary loan! and if they still don't have it, you can usually request that your library order a book.

take advantage of books in the public domain. most classics are now in the public domain, which means that you can read them for free on Project Gutenberg, and if you use apple products, you can usually find them as free ebooks on Apple Books as well. if you're looking for audiobooks, Project Gutenberg also has those. you can also check out LibriVox, which is a volunteer-based organization that provides free audiobooks of public domain books. you can find a lot of their books as free podcasts on spotify!

reread old favorites. this is my personal favorite way to get out of a reading slump. familiar favorites are great for getting your brain back into reading mode without having to introduce yourself to a brand new story. you can also take the opportunity to annotate, if you're into that! speaking of which:

don't let the idea of annotation intimidate you. if you're not being graded, you can do whatever you want with annotations! i know some people who choose specific themes and tab them in their books, which is cool. some people just highlight favorite quotes and passages, and that's good too! you can pick out foreshadowing, make notes on things you find funny or interesting, even draw on the pages! if it's your copy of a book, then you can do whatever you like with it.

challenge yourself to write reviews. even if it's only a few sentences, it makes you engage more with the story, which is a good thing! you don't have to share these reviews, you can keep them in a private journal or document if you like. but it's good to make you think more about the book you've just read.

check the trigger warnings. if you have any triggers whatsoever, you definitely want to check trigger warnings before you read a book. you can usually find them by scrolling through goodreads reviews, or by googling "[book name] trigger warnings."

let yourself get distracted sometimes. i know this sounds counterintuitive, but hear me out. if you're in the middle of reading and suddenly you start thinking about scrolling through social media or something, finish your chapter and then let yourself scroll for a few minutes. it's better to give yourself a few minutes to scroll and then come back to your book, rather than continue "reading" while just thinking about scrolling. i'm not saying to put down your book and devote yourself to your instagram feed for the rest of the day; just take a few minutes, then get back to your book. do it between every chapter if you have to. or, if you decide you want a snack or something to drink, go get it! you don't have to sit still for hours on end if that doesn't work for you.

find someone, anyone, that you can talk to about books. it can be a person irl or online, a friend or coworker or family member. you can join a book club or a discord server. just, if you can, find someone to talk to about the books you're reading. this is another way to engage more with your reading material, because you're thinking about it in conversation, and it's also a way to get more excited about the things you're reading! you don't even have to be reading the same books. you can also recommend books to each other, and discover new favorites this way.

try reading more than one book at a time. mix and match genres, time periods, and styles so that you have different books going for different moods. that way, if one book isn't holding your attention, you have another one that will.

social media is cool, but don't let it control you. let social media bring you new book recommendations and friends, but don't let it dictate what you read or how you organize your bookshelves. just because everyone else is reading something doesn't mean you have to, if you don't want to; just because everyone else has a picture-perfect reading nook doesn't mean you need one, too. you aren't less of a reader because you don't spend hundreds of dollars on new books, or because you don't read the most popular genres and authors. you also aren't less of a reader for reading what's most popular! again, you aren't in competition with anyone else. don't let bookfluencers steal your joy.

obviously, this list isn't all-encompassing or universal. this is just the advice that helped me get back into reading after years of barely touching a book. i hope there is something on this list that can help you, if you need it. happy reading!

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Hey Derin, can I ask you a question or two about publishing? (If no, close your eyes for the next bit and click near where you remember the delete button was.)

I'm writing something with the dream of publishing it one day and I'm considering all avenues at this stage. What led you to publishing serially online? What are the pros of your experience doing that?

Asking you because I was looking over your site earlier today and thinking about how comfortable a place the internet feels - less of a big step than traditional publishing, or even putting out a whole story at once for self-publishing.

I've never pursued trad publishing and have no plans to ever do so, it was immediately obvious that it wasn't for me, so I can't give you like, comparisons. I only even got into indie publishing because my readers were demanding ebooks and paperbacks so I just shrugged and got them made. Sometimes I get asked trad vs. indie publishing questions that I do not have the experience to answer.

This question, though, I can answer. I didn't sit down and go "how should I publish these? Online, or through a trad publisher, or what?" I approached web serial writing directly as a career without considering publishing my writing as books at all; that was never on the radar until the readers wanted them. And the reason I started writing a web serial was simple -- it was a hobby that suited my lifestyle.

I'd written serial fiction before; fanfiction, some r/hfy stuff, just whatever I felt like, and I had a serious problem experienced by many casual writers -- I tended not to finish stuff. The stuff that had never made it to the web was even worse; I had so many novels in progress on my hard drive that I'd gotten to the end of the first act of, before moving onto a new idea. I needed something to do with my time (I'd moved back to my hometown to spend time with my dying grandfather and was unemployed) and posting a web serial with a strict schedule and a patreon seemed like the best way to force myself to actually finish my stories. If a handful of people were giving me a couple of buck a month, I wouldn't be able to just drift off to something else; I'd have to finish the story.

And it worked. I got a new job and wrote Curse Words on my off weeks, then that job ended and my Patreon was paying my new mortgage and suddenly this was just kind of my job now. And then enough people were asking for ebooks and paperbacks that I had to figure out how to make those happen. And this is kind of my life now I guess.

In terms of pros I would say:

Low barrier to entry/small steps of progression: You can just start publishing on a website for free whenever you want. You can make your own website for free and publish on that (I did). It takes five minutes or less to learn how to do and you don't need to buy anything. Your time commitment is mostly Writing The Story, which is presumably what you want to be spending your time on anyway. If you do it for 2 months and decide you hate it? You can stop. No harm, no foul.

No boss: You're beholden to your patrons and nobody else. You can write whatever the fuck you want, wherever the fuck you want, however often you want. The only deadline is the schedule that you yourself set, and you can set it to suit your lifestyle.

Payment model: The patreon/ko-fi sponsorship model is vastly superior, in my opinion, to making money via book sales. There's too many factors involved to really say if you make more or less money on Patreon, but what it has is predictability. Patrons come and go, but slowly. I can predict my monthly income from my supporters to within a hundred dollars or so. This is a massive advantage when you have bills to pay. Book sales surge unpredictably, and while you can bank on things like advances if you go the trad publishing route, these are few and far between.

Time: There are minimal delays in web serial publishing. No waiting months or years at a time for your book to chew through the machinery of a publisher, no long delays as your agent works or contracts are negotiated. Indie publishing is faster but still has far more delays than web serial publishing; most notably, you have to write the entire book first, often with little idea of how well it's going to perform. I don't do well with waiting periods or having to coordinate timing with others, so web serial publishing works best for me.

Marketability: Web serials have a far smaller audience than books, but they're also easier to market to that audience. For one thing, they're usually free, and it's a lot easier to convince someone to try a free story instead of buying one. For another, their one-chapter-at-a-time nature feels like less of a commitment and less intimidating to some people, even though they are traditionally much longer than books tend to be. Also, their chapter-by-chapter nature allows speculation and jokes and fanart and stuff to be spread while the story is still going, which is great marketing, especially when readers end up talking about it far longer than they would talk about a book (because they're reading it chapter-by-chapter for far longer).

But the biggest advantage in marketability is what I call 'rolling weight enthusiasm'.

When you're pushing a cart or something, it takes a lot of effort to get started, but once you're cruising at a consistent speed, you can rely on momentum to do half the work for you. You can build more and more speed with the same effort, because a rolling weight is maintaining that momentum. Writing a web serial is a lot like that; the consistent release schedule means that if you can get people invested, it's much easier to keep them invested, because they're waiting a very short period of time (a few days to a week, depending on your release schedule) to get more of the story. If you're releasing books, there might be more than a year between releases; you can keep a dedicated audience interested for that long, but it's much harder to hold onto the casual readers. There are so, so many book series that I've only read half of because at some point a new book was released and I didn't notice. If you write and publish books, you have to do a big part of the marketing all over again to let people know that the next one is out. Web serials don't have this problem. When's the next chapter out? soon enough that the previous chapter is still fresh in your mind. soon enough that you probably don't have time to finish the fanart this one made you think of.

Immediate feedback: Another great thing about web serials is that you can watch the audience reaction in real time. Not only that but, unlike with a book that people read all at once, you get very detailed feedback specific to each chapter. I don't mean people telling you about the story; reader suggestions and 'constructive criticism' is almost universally useless and can generally be thrown out. If you trust somebody's writing and editing skills enough to take feedback from them, you should ask that person directly; random readers are unlikely to be experts and unlikely to have accurate advice.

Instead, watch them discuss it amongst themselves. What did they get right away, and what are they confused about? what did they react most strongly to; is the dominant emotional reaction to the various characters vaguely in line with what you intended? Check the theories; how well are they predicting future events? (If everyone is guessing the Big Twist, then you need to put more effort into selling it so that it's not a let down; the less surprising a twist is, the better the writing has to be to pull it off. But if nobody is guessing the Big Twist, then you have insufficiently foreshadowed it. You're looking for a very high population of readers being accurate about the information they're expected to have gleaned, and a small population being accurate about twists and stuff, and you want that small population to grow as they get closer to the twist.) Checking these reactions can give you a better idea of what you need to emphasise, clarify, or foreshadow in the text.

[dduane]

Just a quick reminder...

For those of you who may want to take advantage of this very reduced price for the Ebooks Direct Whole Store bundle: it's about to go away.

So if you want it, grab it now!

[toothsalad]

i hate enforced scarcity in ebooks and audiobooks at libraries. hey you know how the one advantage of digital media is that endless copies can be distributed simultaneously? what if we didn't do that.

[miabbh]

Baekhyun and the reader have a big fight because Baekhyun thinks she's being unnecessarily jealous. He unintentionally says hurtful things to the reader and she cries a lot. But the real thing is that when Baekhyun goes to apologize to her, she says, "You're not ashamed of making your pregnant wife cry, are you?" and shocks him with this news.

I would be happy if you could write such a story. Thank you and have a nice day! 🩷

Don't Make Me Wait ⌛

husband!baekhyun x reader

Genre: slightly angst, jealousy (by the reader), pregnancy | ~2,6k words

The apartment was quiet—too quiet. The kind of silence that wasn’t peaceful nor heavy, stretching between them like an unspoken truth you didn't want to acknowledge. You sat curled up on the couch, staring at the untouched dinner still warm on the table, the candle you had lit hours ago flickering weakly.

Baekhyun was late again.

Not that he had done anything wrong—not really. He had texted earlier, saying work ran long, apologizing like he always did. But lately, the apologies felt routine, like a script he repeated without thought. And maybe that’s what hurt the most—not the lateness itself, but the growing feeling that you were becoming an afterthought in his life.

Not that you could make yourself blame him anyway—although maybe it could explain the feeling punching in your chest in an easier way. He was just doing his job, being the hardworking man you felt in love with and were perfectly aware of the consequences when you said I do. And if you were realistic, he was practically sent home to rest since the new company, so you really have a lot of time together.

The last weeks, though... you just barely saw each other awake—the biggest frequent glince you had of him was his cute and serene pouty face as he whines as you moved away from his arms, the morning starting early to you; and his soft smile through your heavy eyeleads as he carried you to bed whispering something your mind couldn't quite understand. Besides that, some calls, texts, some silly and cute selfies; some teasing angles of him proving he was giving his best on getting ready for the new season.

But.... his best was when he arrived home, announcing himself and just wait long enough for you to greet him back before looking for you around the house if you took a too long time to answer, and then kiss you like he needed to, like you were the oxygen that he did not breathe all day.

He was breathing lately, it seems. Breathing the sandwiches he ordered because a dancer of his said it was good; breathing the horrible green drink that allegedly helps to eliminate toxins because a dancer of his other dancer said was extraordinarily efficient; breathing the short documentary he watched during the break with his friend; breathing very deeply the last tiktok trend with his choreographer and staff.

It was bitter, the taste of all this at the end of so many days—or it was simply some change in your taste buds that made everything but tasty, as you read this afternoon in an ebook about pregnancy and maternity.

You wanted to tell him today, taking advantage of being so thoughtful and nervous about that that sleep would surely not come before he arrived. You knew him, you really did, and you were not scared of his reaction; still, your heart was beating so fast at the thought of him seeing you—really seeing you—again, even though it was not exactly because of you, keept you in check.

The sound of keys and the door opening took you from the thoughts, and you had to take a deep breath, reviewing all the words you thought about saying.

He wasn't alone, though. No, he was alone—but he was talking on the phone. He walked in, his eyes widening as he saw you awake sat on the couch. He murmured a "hey, love" under his breath, leaning in to kiss your forehead before signaling he was going to the bathroom.

Okay, okay. Sometimes business come home.

As he came back, though, typing something on the phone, a bumpy smile on his face, it was a bit too much. You sat on your seat on the table, following suit as he took off his jacket.

"We're going out tomorrow morning with the boys." he said, his tone betraying the enthusiasm for the plans. "We finally managed to get matching schedules after like- a month and an half?"

You hmm in response.

"But are you going to come home earlier, then?" you asked, the food in your plat untouched.

Baekhyun frown, chewing. His phone buzzed on the corner of the table.

"Probably not, babe, I still don't feel a part of the choreo and Kasper is stopping by to help."

You nodded, lips pressing into a thin line as you stared at your plate. His answer wasn’t surprising, but it still stung. But still, you didn't have the heart to confront him about it. You just couldn't, somehow... not like this, not right now.

“I see.” you murmured, poking at the food with the fork.

Baekhyun glanced up at you, sensing something off in your tone. His phone buzzed again, and you caught the flicker of hesitation in his eyes before he reached for it. He unlocked the screen, quickly typing a response, that same shadow of a smile on his lips—but if the plans were getting great, he didn't say a thing. You exhaled slowly, trying to steady the weight pressing against your chest. And the table trembled again, and you couldn't help back.

"Is Kasper going too?" The question slipped out before you could stop it, quiet but sharp enough to make Baekhyun pause mid-chew.

He blinked at you, caught off guard.

"What?"

You shook your head, setting your fork down, looking at everything but this eyes, wishing he couldn't see you fighting the tears. The heat went up through your cheeks, warming the ground for your almost inevitable crying. No, you would hold back!

“Never mind.” you managed to say.

“No, hold on.” He put his phone down, sitting up straighter. “What do you mean?”

You hesitated, feeling ridiculous now that the words had left your mouth. But it was too late to take them back. It was not like you, to get.... jealous of how time with other people.

“Nothing.” you said again, forcing a small smile. Nah, it was the hormones, you silently blamed. “Forget I said anything.”

Baekhyun wasn’t having it.

“We don't know yet. But you have any objection on Kasper going too?” His voice wasn’t defensive, but there was an edge to it—like he was trying to make sense of something that hadn’t even crossed his mind.

“It’s not about that.” you admitted, rubbing your temple, the tears seemed to sisappear fast this way.. “It’s just…” You sighed, searching for the right words. “Lately, it feels like you have so much space in your life for everyone and everything—except me.”

Baekhyun frowned, his gaze softening.

“That’s not true.”

"Isn't it?" You let out a quiet sigh, almost a mocking laugh with it, shaking your head. “Looks like it."

“Babe…” He reached across the table, but you leaned back instinctively, putting just enough distance between you that he noticed.

"You don't see it, do you?" You exhaled, eyes locked onto his. "You come home, kiss me, ask how my day was, but you're not really here. You're thinking about work, about schedules, about dances, about—" You swallowed hard, forcing yourself to calm down. "I don't doubt that you love me, Baek. But lately, I feel like I'm just… part of your routine."

Baekhyun’s expression shifted, frustration creeping in.

"That’s not fair." he muttered. "I’ve been working hard, trying to balance everything—”

"I know that!" Your voice cracked slightly, emotion bubbling to the surface. "And I’m proud of you. I always have been. But when was the last time you asked me how I felt and actually listened? When was the last time you noticed that I’m not okay, or that I want more kisses, and that I need your help for—? I never had to ask and now I struggle in front of you but you do nothing until I have it almost done!"

Silence.

His brows knitted together, as if he was about to say something—but he didn’t. And that silence said more than words ever could.

You inhaled sharply, feeling your chest tighten. Don’t cry. Don’t cry.

Baekhyun rubbed a hand over his face, exhaling deeply.

“I didn’t realize you felt that way.” he admitted, his voice quieter now. “But… babe, I can’t constantly reassure you. I need you to trust me. We're married, I literally carry proof of that daily. I can't just– check on you all the time, you know how to ask for help when you need it, babe.”

You froze.

The words hit like a slap, not because they were cruel, but because they implied something that made your stomach turn—like you were being unreasonable, overreacting.

Baekhyun must have realized it too, because his eyes widened slightly.

“Wait, I didn’t mean it like—” But it was too late. Your throat felt tight, and before you could stop yourself from actually crying, you stood up.

“I think I’m done.” you whispered, your voice unsteady pushing your plate away. “Good night, Baekhyun.”

And you walked away before he could even say another word, blinking back the sting of tears as you made your way to the bedroom with a blurry vision.

Baekhyun didn’t follow you. His footsteps didn't rush to get to you before you closed the door. For the first time in a long time, he let you walk away. And somehow, that hurt even more.

Baekhyun sat frozen at the dining table long after you disappeared into the bedroom. The plate in front of him remained half-eaten, but he had lost his appetite completely.

The silence in the apartment felt heavier now, suffocating. The buzzing nerve wracking by its sound and the constant shake of the glasses on the wooden table.

He ran a hand through his hair, exhaling sharply. What the hell just happened?

It wasn’t like you to get upset over something like this. Sure, you were sensitive sometimes, but you always talked things through. This time, though… this time, you had walked away.

And the worst part?

He had let you.

Baekhyun rubbed his temples, feeling the weight of regret settle in his chest. He replayed your words in his mind—your voice, tight with emotion, the tears swelling in your eyes, your cheeks red as you tried to hold them back. The way you had looked at him, like you were tired of fighting… of fighting for his attention.

"When was the last time you noticed that I’m not okay?"

His stomach twisted. Had he really been so wrapped up in everything else that he failed to see you slipping away? You we're more tired lately, that's for sure: the weird positions in which you fall asleep speaking by themselves. The cause behind it, though? He really didn't know, but he should.

He pushed his chair back with a quiet scrape, glancing toward the bedroom door. The light was off.

Maybe he should give you space.

Maybe—

No.

He needed to fix this. Now.

Baekhyun stood up, making his way to the bedroom. He hesitated just outside the door, hand resting on the handle. For the first time in a long time, he felt nervous about stepping inside.

Still, he took a breath and pushed it open.

The room was dark except for the soft glow of the hallway’s light filtering through the open door You were lying on your side, facing away from him, curled up beneath the blankets.

“Babe?” His voice was quiet, hesitant.

You didn’t answer. He sighed, rubbing the back of his neck.

“I know you’re awake.” he whispered.

Still nothing.

Carefully, he sat on the edge of the bed, close but not touching you. He wanted to reach out, but something about the way your shoulders were stiff, the way you held yourself so still—it told him you weren’t ready.

“I’m sorry." he murmured, staring at his hands. “I wasn’t trying to make you feel like you don’t matter. That’s the last thing I’d ever want.”

Silence.

Baekhyun swallowed hard, pushing forward anyway.

“I didn’t see it.” he admitted. “I didn’t realize how much I’ve been neglecting us. You’re right. I’ve been so caught up in work, in making sure I do everything right there, that I didn’t notice I was doing things wrong here.”

You shifted slightly under the blanket, but you still didn’t speak.

“I love giving you smooches. And hugs. And help you although I know you can do whatever it is on your own—most of the times, sometimes another pair of hands are really needed…” his voice grows quieter, his chest heavy with scenarios of you feeling so lonely, even when he was there. It reminded him of the past, when nothing seemed right nor fair in his life—he wasn't alone, but he felt like he was. You living the same feeling? He couldn't have that. “I'm sorry…”

Baekhyun sighed.

“I’m an idiot, huh?”

Finally, you exhaled a soft, humorless laugh.

“Sometimes.”

He smiled a little at that. A small victory. Encouraged, he turned toward you, placing a hand gently on your shoulder.

“Can you look at me, please?”

You hesitated before finally rolling onto your back, blinking up at him. Your eyes were puffy from crying, and Baekhyun felt his chest tighten with guilt.

“My love…” his thumb gently runned down your cheeks. “I am really sorry. I'll be managing the next week differently, alright? Make time to have dinner together and hear you complain about everything everyday. I promise you. Share the tea too, while some shitty show plays on TV...”

You nodded slightly, your eyes still glassy, but you can't help but roll them.

“You’re not ashamed of making your pregnant wife cry, are you?”

The words slipped from your lips softly, but they might as well have been a right twinge. Baekhyun froze, the colour of his cheeks ghosting for a moment.

His brain completely short-circuited.

“W-what?” His voice cracked, eyes widening.

Your expression was unreadable, but your fingers instinctively rested on your stomach—a small, almost unconscious gesture. Baekhyun followed the movement, his gaze locking onto your hand. His heart pounded.

Pregnant?

His mouth opened, but no words came out. A thousand thoughts crashed into him at once, but none of them formed into anything coherent.

“You… you’re…” He swallowed, looking back at you, completely overwhelmed. “You’re pregnant?”

You nodded slowly.

Silence stretched between you.

Then—

“Oh my god.”

Baekhyun surged forward, pulling you into his arms before you could say anything else, the cool air on the room cooling your back. His grip was tight, almost desperate, as if the reality of your words had just hit him full force.

You felt him exhale against your shoulder, his body trembling slightly.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” His voice was muffled, thick with emotion.

You hesitated, then whispered.

“I wanted to. But we kept missing each other. And then… we started fighting.”

Baekhyun pulled back just enough to cup your face, his thumbs brushing away the remnants of your tears. His eyes were glistening, filled with something raw and unfiltered.

“I’m so sorry.” he breathed. “For everything. For not seeing you, for making you feel alone—God, baby, I should have been here. I will be here.”

You searched his gaze, and for the first time in weeks, you saw him—fully present, fully yours.

“Promise?” you asked, voice small.

Baekhyun leaned down, pressing his forehead to yours.

“I swear.” he murmured. “You and our baby… you’re my whole world.”

His hand slid over your stomach, hesitantly at first—like he was afraid of breaking the moment. When you placed your hand over his, guiding him, his breath hitched.

A tear slipped down his cheek, but he didn’t care.

“I love you." he whispered. “Both of you!” a smile illuminated his face. “I'm taking friday as a day off. I will need to rotate but I will take a day off to do the deep cleaning of the week. And tell me about the appointments, okay? I'll go with you.”

And for the first time in a long time, you felt truly seen—with Baekhyun mentally rearranging the schedule, making plans for you both, a conversation of something you both could look forward to, while resting in each other's arms, feeling every touch.

[earlronove]

It's almost been two years since I started self-publishing and in that time, I have 7 books out! Wow!

So, hey, if you're new to me (or haven't picked up anything yet), take advantage of my new itchio bundle! 7 ebooks for $7 USD! A steal! 🌻 Get a whole handful of genre and moods, showcasing what really makes my books well, mine!

Happy Reading! Find the sale here! And if you're curious what all these books are about? Either check the sale link or click the read more below for short summaries!

🌻 Hymn of Memory is the story of Morgan whose sacred duty eats away his memory so much so, he decides to run away from it all and tries to remember what all he's forgotten.

💀 Forevermore is the story of Nezael, an up-and-coming necromancer shut up in an old tower who begins to want more than what his life will give him. Then he spies a handsome woodsman from town...

🕯️ The Devil in the Woods is the story of disaster teens trying to debunk an urban legend of the woods in their sleepy town only to find out it might be real when one of them disappears in the dark.

🌠Born of Scourge is the tale of a personified fallen star who seeks to destroy humanity as revenge for the other fallen stars who have already been sacrificed. Except he has to act like he has their best interest at heart and then he begins to grow soft for his human companions...

🚀Wherever the Stars Call is the space adventure of two runaways from the federation who accidentally save and team up with a vampire in space to find a new life for themselves living life their way.

🔮The Magician & The Bard is the first compiled book of the fantasy misadventure web serial featuring a magician new and naive to the world below and a wandering bard who needs to stay on the move at all costs.

🕊️Errant Wings is the story of Asher who grows angel wings instead of the devil wings he expects and how has to contend with his entire life in disarray and a city who wants to decide for him how his life is going to be from then on.

[jokeringcutio]

Abijah Fowler x (f) Assassin Reader Drabble [ Warnings: Smut]

AN: On popular demand, another Abijah Fowler x Reader. You are an assassin set out to kill Fowler. It doesn't go according to plan.

Warnings: Non-con/dub-con content, SMUT (not as detailed as you're used from me, sorry, I'll give the prompt a retry in the future, possibly as a consensual forbidden love fic >D ), Not beta-read. Quick Drabble. ~~ Masterlist - Request Box - Ebooks&Website - Support me on Ko-Fi ~~

You watched him through the slats of the ceiling, your heart a drumbeat in the silence. Abijah Fowler, the man with the soul of a serpent, was seated at the head of a long, dark table. Such an outlandish habit. His fingers, stained with the ink of sin, traced the lines of a map that plots downfall and destruction. The other men, shadows in the dim light, nodded and murmured their assent to his vile plans — willing puppets dancing on his twisted strings.

Corrupted souls, all of them. But they weren’t your concern.

Your grip on the hilt of your dagger tightened. You had memorized the layout of this place, moved through the corridors like a ghost, unseen, unheard. Now you hovered above them, an angel of vengeance poised to strike. Your mission was clear: end Abijah Fowler.

He was explaining something, his voice a gravelly melody that carried tales of violence and power. His strong and broad shoulders moved, dipped backward as if he tried to loosen the muscles in them. His oddly colored hair captured your attention, thinking it had been a color akin to bronze or perhaps even gold once. But streaks of grey made him seem more like the other old men in this country. If it hadn’t been for his distinct facial features, the pale color of his skin, and the large shape of his bright-colored eyes.

An angel of death you saw in him. Anyone else called him a demon.

He regaled them with stories of conquests past, painting pictures with words dipped in blood. They laughed, a chorus of discordant notes, and you felt the bitterness rise in your throat.

"Of course," Fowler's voice sliced through the laughter, "it all depends on eliminating any... unexpected threats." His eyes, predator green, suddenly fixed on you, turned upward to the ceiling and straight at your hidden person. A cold smile curled his lips. "Isn't that right?"

The room fell silent. Every muscle in your body tensed, ready to spring, to fight. But you remained still, barely breathing. There was a chance this was all just a bluff, that he hadn’t seen you. But then you saw his unwavering gaze, saw the unnatural bright green eyes that rested firmly upon you, and you knew that you were exposed, the advantage lost. You cursed inwardly, waiting for his next move, knowing the game had changed.

"Come now, don't be shy," he coaxed, his tone mocking. "Join us."

You dropped down gracefully despite the hammering in your chest. Standing before them, outnumbered but unflinching, you refused to let them show any fear. Stoically, you faced them, thinking of all the lessons and all the training you had. The men stared, their gazes ravenous, but it was Fowler who held your attention. A dangerous dance awaited, everyone could feel it in the air. But you knew his moves, knew how he could react, knew you stood little chance in a hand-on-hand combat.

Especially if he brought his demon guns.

You needed a distraction, something that could increase your chances of survival. Your heart raced, a wild drumbeat in the cavern of your chest. Words, like poisoned arrows, flew from your lips as you stepped closer to Abijah Fowler.

"I've heard tales of your prowess," you murmured, voice a silken thread designed to ensnare. "They say no man can match you in the dark arts of war and pleasure."

Fowler's green eyes glinted, a predator basking in the glow of his prey's admiration. He let out a low chuckle, the sound rumbling through the tension-thick room. "Flattery will get you nowhere, my dear." His words were honey-laced with venom.

One step. Another. Close enough now that you could count the lines etched into his weathered face. You felt the heat emanating from his broad frame. Fowler's hand shot out, swift as a striking snake, clasping your wrist in an iron grip. The trap snapped shut.

"Gotcha," he whispered, a taunt wrapped in a victory.

Instinct took over. Your body remembered its training before your mind caught up. You twisted, a flash of movement, wrenching against his hold. The element of surprise was on your side, for a heartbeat or two.

"Feisty," Fowler observed, almost admiringly.

The dance of death began. A ballet of blows and blocks. You lunged, struck, kicked—each move a desperate plea for freedom. Fowler countered, effortlessly, his strength overwhelming. The other men watched, wolves observing their alpha.

"Should we help?" one ventured, doubt lacing his voice.

“No, he can take her, easily,” another one guffawed.

You hated him for the comment and wanted to punch his face in, but you knew he was right. Fowler was bigger than you, broader, heavier, and more skilled in combat. You were trained to be a silent creeper, someone who brought death without being seen, a shadow of mercy, or an anger of hell.

Another heroic block of his attack, but your underarm was smarting. Pain shot through you, your body feeling sore. When he finally landed a blow that sent you staggering back, you tasted the copper tang of defeat.

"Never send a child to do a killer's job," Fowler sneered, advancing on you, the space between you charged with the promise of pain and something darker still.

Breath short, chest heaving. His presence loomed, an oppressive shadow eclipsing your tumultuous thoughts. Abijah Fowler's green eyes glinted with a predatory gleam, the corner of his mouth twitching upward in a macabre grin that set your nerves on edge.

Was he studying you? The feeling that settled in the pit of your stomach was unsettling. Abijah Fowler was an attractive man, despite all his oddities. And hadn’t his character been so devilish, you might have fallen for his charm. But he was a demon. And in his eyes, you now saw demonic thoughts rise as he studied your features, eyes roaming your skin as if you were unclothed.

You felt the grip of his hands around your wrists, squeezing just a bit tighter. Felt the calloused skin of his thumb as it brushed gently past the mouse of your palm.

"Outside," he commanded, voice low and laden with dark promise. The men hesitated, exchanging leering glances that spoke volumes of their wretched character. "The lass and I need privacy."

"Seems Fowler's got himself a new plaything," one of the men chuckled, coarse laughter bubbling up from the others as they filed out, their intentions thick in the air like a miasma.

Your heart thrummed against your ribs, each beat a silent drum heralding doom. He was close now, too close; the heat from his body mingled with yours. You could kill him—if only you could reach your weapon. But he had smacked it out of your hand with the first blow, it had clunked to the wooden floor aimlessly. You couldn’t even tell where it was from where you stood. Your fingers twitched, betraying the urge.

"I'm not some doll for your amusement," you managed to say, words edged with a defiance you didn't feel.

"Oh, by the time I am done with you, you will wish I’d killed you sooner,” Fowler murmured. You could smell the odd sourness of his breath and wondered what had caused it. His grip on you tightened.

“Who sent you? And why would they send someone so young and unqualified," Fowler murmured, cruel satisfaction seeping through his tone. His breath caressed your ear, sending involuntary shivers down your spine.

The room cleared, the door clicking shut behind the last man. Silence fell heavy, punctuated only by your ragged breaths and the pounding of your pulse. Then, movement. Fowler's hands were upon you, guiding you with unwanted familiarity—a predator toying with its prey.

"Let's see what you've made of," he said, pressing you down forcefully over the table that dominated the center of the room. Your cheek met cold wood, and you flinched as the ink from the maps smeared beneath you, staining your skin with the blueprint of their vile machinations.

"Consider this a different kind of battle," Fowler whispered, his voice a serpent's hiss as he leaned over you, his weight an unspoken threat.

Fowler's hand slithered up your leg, rough fingers catching on the fabric of your clothes. A tug, a deliberate pull, and the material gave way to bare skin, your exposed calf a pale contrast against the darkness of his touch. His breath hitched ever so slightly, a sign of his burgeoning arousal not lost on you.

You struggled on instinct, but stilled when you felt the bulge against your thigh increase. This didn’t actually arouse him, did it?

"Fight me," he growled, a low rumble in his chest as you twisted beneath him, struggling for leverage. "I do love it when you struggle like that."

Your muscles coiled, ready to spring, but he was a slab of stone pinning you down. The heat of his body radiated through the thin barrier of your clothing, igniting a reluctant fire within. You hated how your body betrayed you, responding to his proximity despite the storm of loathing raging in your heart.

His hand wandered with more audacity, venturing into forbidden territory. A gasp tore from your lips, unsanctioned pleasure sparking along your nerves. Fowler chuckled, a sound laced with darkness, as if he relished in pulling these reactions from you.

"Good girl," he purred, his breath hot against your ear. "Let go, just for a moment."

You fought against the tide rising within, but the dam broke under his relentless pursuit, waves of reluctant ecstasy crashing over you. Your climax hit with the ferocity of a tempest, leaving you shuddering and vulnerable in its wake.

He wasted no time, freeing his aching long cock, the size and girth you had never seen before. A gasp tore from your lips as he sheathed himself inside of you, bottoming out with little mercy. He set a grueling pace, showing little care for your pleasure or well-being at this point. But your core was slippery, your walls fluttering around him with passion, and you had to bite your tongue to keep from moaning loudly with each and every deep thrust his foreign body gave you.

Was this how it had been for every lover he had ever taken, forced or otherwise?

A second orgasm wracked through your body. You’d find an excuse for this later on, if you were to survive this ordeal. You would find a way to condone the liquid that dripped from your core and onto the table below, the way the stained ink brushed past your nipples, the way your body pulsed with pleasure after Abijah Fowler found his release.

You felt a hot palm on your naked back, gently caressing the skin there, and heard the low hum that came from his lips. He sounded pensive, as if he were determining your fate. Your thoughts slid back to your weapons and the many ways to get your hands on them, but his body still kept you trapped underneath him.

As you lay there, trembling, Fowler's voice slithered in your ear once more. "There's a task I need done," he murmured, the words vibrating against your skin. "A certain individual who needs to be...taken care of."

His implication was clear, an order veiled as an offer. "Do this for me," he continued, "to my satisfaction, and I shall spare your life."

"My life..." you rasped, your voice laden with the weight of reality. There was no choice, only the illusion of one. You nodded, sealing a devil's pact, while inside, a lethal promise took root. Fowler had ignited a vengeful blaze, and from its ashes, you would rise—his destruction, your sole aim.

This was not the end. It was a twisted beginning, and you swore to yourself, to the silent gods of retribution, that you would have your revenge.

Abijah Fowler would pay.

~ AN: I want to do this character more justice (and the smut). But quite frankly, it is a bloody miracle I have been writing anything at all. Things don't go well health-wise, but we'll know more at the end of this month. I hope to feel good enough soon to write a better drabble for Abijah and Reader.

[erintoknow]

2024 reading roundup

i managed to read over a 100 books this year, which is, personally nuts, for me as a pace, especially when i feel busier then ever. the joys and benefits of downtime at the desk job, i guess? the bulk of what i read is YA which is ostensibly for professional reasons as a ya librarian but i was still able to sneak in a few decent adult grade books at least

this is probably also the most trans fem authored fiction i've read in a single year (hooray), in large part things to having a resource like @thetransfemininereview now whereas before i just kinda out in the woods poking at rocks with a small stick, praying the library will pick things up

so like, here's a sampling of some books and a few thoughts; trans fem authored books listed first ofc ofc:

These Fragile Graces, This Fugitive Heart by Izzy Wasserstein

goodreads says i read this in december but i swore i picked it up over the summer - anyway, transfem protag, transfem author, sorta cyberpunk noir murder mystery deal. really enjoyed this book, especially with how it played with cyberpunk genre conceits while still feeling like it's not just importing stuff unchanged from the 80s.

The Raven Tower by Ann Leckie

i'm still stuck waiting for a library to get the Translation State ebook in so i thought i'd give Leckie's fantasy novel a spin; this was great. i'm uncultured swine apparently (joke) so i didn't pick up on the very end that at least half the book was a twist on Hamlet but i was on board from pretty much first page. the use of 1st and 2nd person with the narrator being a character in the story telling the events of the novel to another character in the story was great. loved the world building and finished the book hoping Leckie will come back to this concept for another go in the future

might be my top book that i read in 2024?

The Sapling Cage by Margaret Killjoy

i really want to talk about this book, but i'm not sure what to say. i didn't realize going in that this would be YA (just because the protag is teen doesn't always equal YA and all) but, yeah, it's very YA. it feels like a gender flipped tamora pierce novel and i gather that was extremely intentional. our trans girl protag trades places with her best friend who was promised to a coven of witches and 'disguises' herself as a girl so she can do so

i liked the book and i'm looking forward to the continuation but the whole thing kind of feels like a dream on review after reading, specific details are hard to grasp onto. the narrative voice of protag feels a lot younger to me then 16, more like 12 or 11 maybe, which felt off? but didn't overly detract from the story which gets into some pretty high stakes!

the ending felt weirdly forced with the big-bad duchess just deciding not to press the advantage and go for the throne after everyone else is exhausted from fighting the big climatic battle, but sure, okay, this is a world where an entire country just collectively agreed to live by anarchist principles so clearly human cognition works differently in this setting

Magica Riot by Kara Buchanan

i read like three different magical girl books/novellas this year which feels wild. anyway, this was great cotton candy treat of a book. a solid entry in the 'everyone is nice to the trans girl for once' genre of trans fem fiction, our protagonist gets to become a magical girl, make friends, and save the day, hooray! it looks like this is going to be a series, which yes, sure, i'm sold

A Little Vice by Erin Elkin

i picked this up on a whim without really knowing what i was getting into and ended up really enjoying it. trans fem egg protagonist is stuck on the sidelines while the plot of a magical girl show plays out at her school with her best friend as one of the lead members. lotta angst and big feelings in this one. i understand this was originally a scribblehub serial? it certainly seems to follow in the scribblehub tradition of 'make as oblivious a headcase of a trans fem egg as possible' but whereas i've bounced off of that before the combination of addressing dsyphoria/angst/and sunk cost fallacy got me hooked - you know i love my sunk cost fallacy characters. also, i wanna add: the metatextual conceit with how each chapter is framed was a really cute touch and really completed the whole vibe

and a sampling of some non trans fem work i chewed through this year:

A Magical Girl Retires by Park Seolyeon, translated by Anton Hur

i picked this up after seeing it get a lot of positive press and... i don't know? maybe it's because i'm missing something about the culture context the book was written in / released into, or because magical girl stuff largely missed me as a kid (i got sucked into digimon instead of sailor moon), but this really fell flat for me. like, i wouldn't call it bad but it felt stale and kind of a surface level take? maybe i would feel better about this book if i hadn't been lead to believe going into it that it was saying something deep and profound

Compound Fracture by Andrew Joseph White

this book fucking rocked, let's be clear - it might be my top non-trans fem authored novel of the year? our protag is a trans boy in an old appalachian mining town who's family has been in a generations long bloody and violent feud with the sheriff's family dating back to a coal miner strike. YA gets a lot of rightly deserved derision i think (i've read enough stinkers this year) but White knocks it out of the park every time and this one was no exception.

Old Wounds by Logan-Ashley Kisner

horror story where a trans boy and his ex, a trans girl while running away to california get stuck in a small town where locals sacrifice a girl every year to the local monster - so who in this scenario gets to decide who counts as a girl?

this was a really fun book, full stop, no notes. easily in my top 5? 10? for the year and not just because i share a name with the trans girl.

The Girl in Question by Tess Sharpe

the sequel i didn't know i wanted, or existed - a follow up to Sharpe's previous book, The Girl's I've Been, which was a fasted paced thriller that kept you engaged even has it jumped back and forth between past and present. The follow up here is more of the same, and while i don't think it follow recaptures the magic, it manages to take the same basic premise and both up the stakes and add a new twist on events that i still came out with a pretty good time

Against Technoableism: Rethinking Who Needs Improvement by Ashley Shew

surprise non-fiction entry - this was a really great and thoughtful little book on how we currently approach ability aids and technology and how we might do better, if you see it, i recommend picking this one up

Some Desperate Glory by Emily Tesh

what if ender's game but not by a homophobe? okay, that's a bit reductive. Some Desperate Glory follows Kyr, a child solider who grew up in a fanatical fascist cult on her painful and reality bending journey to learn empathy. Kyr never really becomes a 'good' person by the end of the story, and she's aware of that, but her journey through self deprogramming her monstrous beliefs set to a backdrop where humanity lost the war (and their homeworld) against an alien empire was way better executed then i expected going in. this book is going to be peak 'your mileage may vary' but is absolutely worth giving a shot

[lemonadeandlanguages]

not saying that ebooks don't have certain advantages over print books, but it's absolutely bonkers to me that some now cost the same (or almost) as their print counterparts

[rosie-chan92]

Best wishes for a happy Easter to everyone 🕊️ May you spend wonderful days with your family and your loved ones 💚🫶🏾

I was drawing a little animation about my trip to London when suddenly I realized that Easter is like three days away 😱 Time flies lately, so I took advantage of it to practice with a pose ebook I just bought. The idea came to me from @fictodreamer's post where she dressed Bruno as a rabbit one Easter past 😂 I was more discreet, even if Bruno doesn't seem to like it completely anyway 😜 Poor darling, what does he have to endure every time for love 🤭💚✨

[trapastrology]

Songs that explain 12H synastry (house pov)

This song explains 12H synastry to a T from the perspective of the house person. Now, there are many different feelings & thoughts that the house person can have. This pov is when the house person is still toxic & scared of surrendering to real love. They tend to self sabotage heavily as well.

Die 4 U- The weeknd

"I'm findin' ways to articulate the feeling I'm goin' through I just can't say I don't love you 'Cause I love you, yeah It's hard for me to communicate the thoughts that I hold But tonight I'm gon' let you know Let me tell the truth"

~The represents the confusion the house person goes thru. They are usually so used to being so closed off to the point where they find it jarring when they start to find themselves feeling these deep & true feelings for the planet person. They also find it hard to express these feelings to the planet person. They are terrified of rejection & getting taken advantage of so even when they feel these feelings & have found a way to articulate them, they'd rather keep it to themselves (which is detrimental to the relationship). This song shows the pov of the house person realizing what they've been doing to sabotage this perfect relationship with the planet person & finally wanting to put all their feelings on display before it's too late & they lose them for good.

"I'm scared that I'll miss you, happens every time I don't want this feelin', I can't afford love I try to find a reason to pull us apart It ain't workin' 'cause you're perfect And I know that you're worth it I can't walk away, oh!"

~This shows how the house person fears vulnerability to the point where they are scared of of even missig the planet person. They are the same ppl who only want true love but at the same time due to what they've been thru they are completely terrified of it. They try to test the planets persons love with ridiculous tests which only tiers the planet. House may try to always look for holes & doubts in the relationship, but they are the ones creating these holes. House starts looking for red flags that aren't even there. & in the end the house person tries to do everything they can to fix the parts of the relationship they can before it's too late

"Even though we're going through it And it makes you feel alone Just know that I would die for you Baby, I would die for you, yeah The distance and the time between us It'll never change my mind, 'cause baby I would die for you"

~When they are having difficulties in the relationship caused by the house person the planet person can indeed feel alone but chooses not to speak about it. Either way it goes, houses feelings are so strong & so pure for the planet that they would kill, steal & lie for them with no hesitation. Most times, they wont even disclose those feelings with the planet person. One day if the time comes the planet sees thru actions how much house truly cares & feels. No matter the circumstances good or bad, the houses feelings rarely change.

"'Cause I can't take this pain forever And you won't find no one that's better 'Cause I'm right for you, babe"

~At the end of the day, the house person thinks (& is most times correct) that no one will love the planet person the way that they do & no one is a better match for them. Most times they just have a bad way of showing it or they choose not to show it at all. They just have to remember that not everyone is their enemy.

~Stay tuned for more stuff like this in my upcoming ebook about the complete ins & outs of synastry! There will be an entire chapter dedicated to dissecting songs from different perspectives of this synastry. Love yall!!!!!!!!