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lascvitae · 2 months ago

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❀ ༉ ‧ ₊ ˚ WANNA MAKE YOU MINE²

♯┆ karina pulls y/n deeper into her world, and even though y/n knows she should be careful, it's already too late. she’s falling hard and fast. and honestly? she already did.

part one. part two. part three.

pairing. karina x fem!reader genre. strangers to lovers, fluff, suggestive!!, goodness karina wants you so bad warning(s). making out, (lots of it actually) cursing, underage drinking, scream mentioned 🤓☝️ karina showing her true colors, karina teases you literally like throughout the entire chapter, she’s possessive and obsessive but you like it :shrug:

word count: 11k

❝baby, don’t be scared, want you everywhere

catch you if i fall, i mean it.❞

── ⟢ ・⸝⸝ katty ᥫ᭡: lawd.🧎‍♀️

masterlist.

minjeong didn’t look at you. she just stared ahead, eyes blank and teary, like her mind was somewhere else.

you swallowed, chest tight. “i’m sorry. you didn’t deserve this.”

she let out another bitter laugh. “yeah, well. i did it to myself. didn’t i?”

“no. you didn’t. you had a crush. you were in love and you trusted someone with that.”

minjeong’s bottom lip wobbled, and her eyes squeezed shut like she was trying to hold everything in.

“why would jiwon do it?” you muttered.

minjeong’s jaw clenched. “i don’t know.“

you turned toward her, your voice quieter now. “how long were you in love with her?”

minjeong didn’t answer right away. just curled her fingers tighter into her sleeves.

“too long. i was stupid. especially after i saw what she did to yujin.”

your eyebrows furrowed.

“shit—“

“who’s that?”

“i— she’s— i’ll just let karina tell you.“ she sniffled.

you bit your lip nervously before nodding slowly and curiously. “does jiwon know you’re here?”

another long silence.

then minjeong shook her head. “i don’t think she cares.”

it made your heart ache. because whatever happened between them, jiwon had a choice.

“i’m gonna fix this.” you said.

minjeong gave you a tired look. “how?”

you didn’t know yet.

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

you didn’t know where else to look.

after hearing minjeong crying in the stairway, you needed jiwon. you needed her to look you in the eye and tell you it wasn’t true. that she didn’t hand over minjeong’s secret like it was nothing. so you ended up at the counselor’s office.

you told yourself that maybe jiwon was here. maybe the guilt pushed her into one of the chairs or forced her to ask the counselor for help. but when you opened the door the office was empty.

you sat down on the fake leather couch. it squeaked under you, and you just sat there.

you stared at the wall with that dumb motivational cat poster. the one that said hang in there.

and then the door opened.

you didn’t look up. didn’t need to. you already knew who it was.

karina closed the door behind her. she stood for a second. as if she was debating whether to speak or just look at you.

“i figured you’d be here.” she said eventually.

you didn’t respond. she stepped further inside.

“you shouldn’t have run off like that.”

“sorry, i didn’t realize i needed your permission to walk away.” you scoffed.

“don’t say it like that.”

“can you just… leave me alone? you knew this would happen. and you didn’t stop it.”

karina stayed quiet for a while. “but i didn’t cause it.”

you let out a bitter laugh. “no. you just sat back and let it happen.”

“she told jiwon and jiwon told someone else. that’s not my fault.”

“but you knew, karina. you knew it would blow up like this. and you let it.”

“no i didn’t.” she protested. “how was i supposed to know that she’d anonymously send in a tip on ning’s page? it isn’t my fault that jiwon betrayed her.”

her words stung you.

‘it wasn’t my fault that jiwon betrayed her.’

‘jiwon betrayed her.’

when the words finally settled, karina was standing right in front of you.

“it isn’t my job to clean up someone else’s mistake.” she continued. “you don’t get to stand here and act like i’m the bad guy. i didn’t sell minjeong out. jiwon did.”

“but you could’ve protected her.” you whispered.

“from what? the effect of her best friend’s actions? i told you. that isn’t my job.”

you winced at her tone.

“leave me alone, karina.”

you looked up at her as she stayed silent. then she stepped back.

“stop looking at me like that and maybe i will.”

and there it was.

you locked eyes with her and even though you were upset with her, it was like you were entranced. again.

you didn’t know what to believe.

“i didn’t care about minjeong’s secret. i cared about what it would do to you.”

you stayed silent.

karina stepped closer. “if i had said something, it still would’ve gotten out. and then you would’ve been right in the middle of it. i didn’t want that.”

“so you just let minjeong burn instead?”

“i would’ve let the whole school burn if it meant keeping you out of it.” the words hit you hard.

“you don’t mean that.”

“i do.”

“i care about you. i care when you cry. when you walk away from me. when you disappear without saying anything.”

“that’s not caring, karina. that’s control.” you shook your head.

“maybe. but it’s still real.”

you didn’t know what to say. so you reached out for her.

hell. you didn’t know why you did it.

maybe it was because you were tired of running from the pull she had on you. but you leaned in.

not all the way.

not enough to say i forgive you or this is okay now.

but enough to feel her warmth.

you didn’t look at her.

“i hate that you always make it feel like it’s just us. like the rest of the world doesn’t matter.”

“because it doesn’t. not when it comes to you.” she said instantly.

you winced. not because she said it but because you believed her.

her hand hovered between you two, not touching you. you let your fingers slide toward hers. just enough for them to meet.

when they did, she caught them softly. you looked at her then.

karina’s voice softened. “you’re not like the rest of them. and i… don’t like sharing things that matter.”

you knew what she meant. you knew she was talking about you.

you leaned into her shoulder. it wasn’t because you forgave now, but because you wanted to. and maybe that was worse. she didn’t say anything, she just let it happen. let you rest against her like she was waiting for it.

you couldn’t help but feel like you fell right into her trap.

karina’s house always felt like it was trying too hard not to be a house. it was always too clean. but tonight, there was something different about it.

the low hum of music from ning’s bluetooth speaker and the scent of popcorn filled the air, accompanied by her candy perfume.

you were sitting on the edge of her velvet couch now, tucked into a cushion with a blanket karina tossed over you. your fingers gripped a cold glass of something sparkling and pink, courtesy of ning.

aeri claimed the armchair, legs folded up with her hoodie zipped halfway as she scrolled through her phone. ning was sprawled out on the floor, face down in her phone beside a half empty bowl of popcorn.

karina sat close as she always did. her thigh pressed against yours, arm draped along the arm of the couch behind you. you could feel her fingertips brushing your shoulder every now and then.

“anyway. i still can’t believe jiwon actually cracked. like damn. she really folded under pressure, huh?” ning started, voice casual in a way that meant she was about to say something dangerous. you didn’t say anything. just stared into your drink.

karina shifted beside you. “ning.”

“what? i’m just saying. i expected better. that girl keeps secrets like it’s her job.”

“she made a mistake.” karina said.

“did she?” ning placed a gummy bear into her mouth before chewing lazily.

“kinda seems like she knew exactly what she was doing.”

“okay but that doesn’t mean you needed to go full tmz at lunch. you nuked our table.” aeri chimed in without looking up.

“and yet, no one one got up until y/n did.” ning said, eyes flicking toward you. the silence that followed made your ears ring. your throat tightened.

karina’s thumb found your knee, rubbing slow and soothing circles. “can you not?”

“i’m just observing. she’s here now, isn’t she? you’re welcome, by the way.” ning said. karina tensed next to you.

“maybe now you’ll finally chill out. stop staring at her like you’re crazy.” ning teased.

“shut up.” karina said. it hit like a brick.

you felt it. the shift. the change in karina’s tone when someone crossed a line, even if it was someone she considered a friend.

“relax. you’re so sensitive when she’s around. it’s kinda cute.” ning said.

“i’m tired.” you said.

“you wanna go upstairs?” karina turned to you immediately.

you stared at her.

“we don’t have to stay down here.“

“yeah. upstairs, please?”

she was on her feet before you could even set your glass down. her hand found yours again and you followed her out of the room without a glance behind you.

she didn’t say anything until you reached the stairs. “i didn’t want you to feel like this.” she mumbled.

you looked over and her eyes were already on you. she was concerned. her gaze was protective in a way that felt way too intense for someone you’d only just gotten close to.

“i’m okay.” you lied.

“you’re not.” she said. and her hand squeezed yours. “but you will be.”

her room door opened with a click. you stepped inside first. you hovered near the doorway, unsure of what to do with your hands.

karina crossed the room and sat at the edge of her bed, kicking off her shoes without a word. she pat the space next to her but didn’t look at you.

you sat. not too close. but not too far either. and for a while, neither of you said anything. just sitting in the quiet.

karina turned toward you slightly. “are you mad at me?”

you didn’t look at her. just stared at the soft curve of the candle’s flame. “i don’t know.”

“you have every right to be.” silence again. “i don't care if anyone else leaves. but not you.”

you turned toward her, heart pounding. “why would i leave?” she stayed silent.

karina leaned back on her hands, eyes focused on the ceiling. “because i scared you.”

“what?” she finally looked at you.

“i didn’t want you to think that i was controlling. or obsessive. you’re the only thing i’ve wanted in a long time that actually makes me feel something. and i was scared that if i pushed too hard, you’d run.”

your breath caught. your chest felt full and tight and warm at the same time. “i wouldn’t.” you said.

karina gave you a laugh that was devoid of any humor. “you say that now.”

“i mean it.”

she looked down. her fingers curled slightly as if she was resisting the urge to reach out for you. “then tell me not to hold back.”

“what?”

“if you want me to stop, i’ll stop. but if you don’t…” she finally looked at you again.

“i won’t hold back anymore.” you were suddenly aware of how close you were. you could feel the heat radiating off her skin.

you stayed silent for a moment. “you scare me sometimes.”

karina wasn’t offended. if anything, she was curious. “why?”

“because you always know what you want. and you always get it.”

“that scares you?” a slow smile found it’s way onto her lips.

“no. what scares me is that i think i want to be yours.” you could feel the air change.

karina leaned in, forehead pressed to yours. “you already are.” then she kissed you.

it was slow. her hand slid to your back, pulling you in. your fingers caressed her hair, her cheek, then her jaw. you memorized the way her breath hitched when you parted your lips for her. you pulled away to catch your breath. but only for a bit.

karina’s lips found yours again. it was like she was memorizing the shape of your mouth and the taste of your breath. you didn’t mean to pull her closer. you didn’t mean to sigh against her lips, or let your hands twist in the material of her hoodie. you didn’t mean to pull her down with you as you leaned back.

but she came willingly, moving with you until she was leaning over you, one hand beside your head and the other still at your back. she kissed you like she was starving. like she was holding back for weeks and finally let herself go. and god, you let her.

you leaned into her, melted into her. you let her kiss you like she owned the moment. because she did. her lips parted just enough to whisper. “you have no idea what you do to me.” your breath caught.

and then—

“HELLO?!?” you both froze.

“okay, wow. i knew it! i told aeri it was happening! pay up, bitch!” ning’s voice echoed from the doorway. karina groaned into your shoulder as you jumped back like you were caught committing a crime.

“ning— what the hell?!”

“oh, don’t ning me. i knocked. twice.” she leaned against the doorframe with zero shame.

“anyway. aeri’s making some strawberry lemonade cocktails and i came to get you before she mixes them with that expired peach vodka again.”

again?

you looked at karina, who looked more annoyed than embarrassed. and then ning disappeared. karina sighed, dragging a hand through her hair.

you were still catching your breath, staring at the door that ning had just came through. “should we go down?” you asked eventually.

karina leaned in one last time, brushing her lips against your cheek. “in a minute.”

“hurry up! i want to toast to the sexual tension finally bursting!” you heard ning yell.

karina groaned.

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

karina’s grip on you didn’t even loosen up once on the walk down. you stepped into the kitchen and were immediately hit by the scent of strawberries, citrus, and something that smelled dangerous.

“okay. i don’t know what to call this one yet, but it’s mostly lemonade and like, strawberry puree… and then like, a splash of evil.” aeri said while standing at the counter. “define ‘splash.’” karina said, eyeing the bottle of vodka on the counter that looked more than half empty.

“i’m not a math prodigy. want some?” aeri shrugged.

“absolutely not.” karina said, but ning was already pouring some into plastic cups for you. one of them was immediately put into your hand.

“cheers to tension relief! and karina’s face when i walked in.” ning said dramatically.

“i will murder you.” karina mumbled.

“i’m not judging! karina’s been like, clinically obsessed with you since day one. it’s honestly a relief that she finally acted on it.” you took a sip.

it was surprisingly good. it had just enough burn at the end to remind you that this was probably a very bad idea. “so are we gonna pretend that i didn’t clock the way karina was looking at y/n two weeks ago?” aeri said, sitting on the barstool.

“are we finally past the mutual pining stage?” you nearly choked on your drink.

“we’re not past anything. we’re right in the middle of it.” karina said. that shut everyone up for a second.

“that was kinda hot.” ning giggled for you. you tried to hide your face behind your cup but karina pulled it down, locking eyes with you.

“none of that.” she said in a voice that only you could hear. you swallowed hard. something that you did a lot around her.

“okay. this is where we toast, guys. you left me hanging.” ning rolled her eyes. you all raised your cups and for a moment it felt weirdly… normal. the tension turned into laughter, sarcasm, and increasingly dangerous drinks. karina stayed close the whole time.

you let her. you weren’t scared anymore. you were curious how much deeper this could go. and somehow, you ended up on karina’s balcony.

one of them, at least.

it was quieter out here. the sliding door clicked shut behind you and karina stepped onto the balcony right after you. the breeze was cool against your skin, courtesy of the ocean not too far away.

your head was light and everything felt slower. it was quiet if you ignored the faint noise of playboi carti playing through ning’s bluetooth speaker.

she finally spoke. “i hated that ning walked in.”

“yeah. i noticed.”

“i’m serious. i waited so long to kiss you like that. i wasn’t done.” she said in a lower voice than usual. her words were a little less accurate. you turned to meet her gaze.

“i think you made your point.” you said quietly.

“did i?” she mumbled, tilting her head.

“because i don’t want there to be any confusion. not with you.” her fingers brushed against yours on the railing as a reminder.

“i like you. in the i can’t stop thinking about you kinda way. maybe i’ve done it all in the wrong order or came on too strong, but i’m not pretending.” your heart did something weird at her words.

“i don’t want to pretend either.” you said. karina’s arm brushed against yours again. you could feel her sigh before you heard it.

“i don’t usually say shit like that. like, i never say shit like that. but with you, i can’t not.” she admit in a slurred voice. you turned your face toward her, and she was already looking at you.

“stay tonight.”

you nodded. maybe it was the drinks. or honestly just karina. but staying felt like the only right answer.

the first thing you felt was warmth of a blanket. then the consequences of last night. karina’s scent still lingered on your skin. it was expensive and addictive.

you stirred, stretching slightly before rolling onto your back. the spot beside you was empty, but it was still warm. you blinked slowly so that your eyes could adjust to the light slipping in from the slightly cracked bathroom door. that shit was huge.

but when you looked inside, you nearly forgot how to breathe.

karina stood in front of the mirror, pulling her damp hair into a high, effortless ponytail. her outfit made you sit up.

it was a black cropped tank top paired with a skirt. just tight enough to show off the slope of her waist. she had on the silver rings she always wore with her sunglasses pushed in her hair. and her back was to you. that was when you saw it.

the spine tattoo.

black ink ran straight down her back. you couldn’t read it from here, but it looked like something elegant and sharp. just like her.

it curved perfectly with the shape of her body, disappearing under the hem of her top. it was hot. unfair.

she bent slightly to grab her lip balm off the sink and you caught yourself staring so hard you forgot how to blink. karina caught your reflection in the mirror.

“you’re awake. did you sleep okay?” you cleared your throat, dragging your eyes away from her back like you weren’t just hypnotized.

“didn’t think your bed would be so soft.”

“you drooled on me. that’s how soft it was.” karina smirked and turned slightly toward you. you groaned and dragged a pillow over your face.

“don’t say that to me right now.” she laughed quietly.

“i made you tea. it’s probably not warm anymore now but it’s the thought.” she spoke. you peeked over the pillow to admire her.

“thanks.” karina walked over to you and sat on the edge of the bed, reaching to caress your cheek with her thumb.

“you looked so peaceful. i didn’t want to wake you.”

“you could’ve.” you mumbled.

“next time.” she responded. there would be a next time. you continued to stare at her.

“what?” she asked, lips curving at your attention.

“you have a spine tattoo.” you said.

“yeah.”

“for how long?”

“for a while.”

“you never said anything.”

“you never asked.” she said, slipping her jacket on slowly and hiding the ink from your view. it was a simple line, but it held so much weight. what else was she hiding from you? you sat up slowly, pulling the blanket up with you. “where’s aeri and ning?”

“alive.” karina smiled.

“that’s good.” you replied.

“i guess.” she stood again and grabbed her lip balm from the organizer, applying it in the mirror. “they’re texting like they’re stranded in the sahara.”

“we’re going out by the way.”

“out?”

“yeah. brunch. or lunch. something along the lines. ning just wants to eat.”

“and you? what do you want?” you smiled, pulling your knees up to your chest. karina tilted her head, giving you that look. the one that always made you forget how to breathe. “i want you with me.” she said simply.

it was crazy how one sentence from her could make your whole body feel like a firework. “okay.” you whispered.

she walked back over and leaned down, pressing a kiss to your temple. “take your time. i’ll wait.”

but all you could think about was that tattoo. and how bad you wanted to trace it with your fingers. you were going to ask about it again later. when it was just the two of you and no jacket in the way.

───────── ౨ৎ─────────

the doors of karina’s car swung open like a reveal scene in a drama. it was the kind of car that made people look twice. karina stepped out first with her sunglasses on. then aeri, stretching a little with an eye roll. then ning, dramatically fluffing her hair like she was getting her picture taken.

then finally, you.

karina was there in time to help you out, her fingers wrapping around your hand before you could even close the door behind you. “keep holding my hand. i like when people see it.” she said under her breath, lips brushing your ear.

“see what?”

“that you’re mine.”

you walked past a group of college guys who clearly noticed her, then did a double take when they saw your hand in hers. karina didn’t react. she just tilted her chin slightly and pulled you closer. “i don’t like how he looked at you.” she said flatly.

“i think he was looking at you, karina.”

“exactly. and then he looked at you like he thought he had a chance.”

you laughed. “you’re insane.”

she just smiled like it was a compliment.

and the second you stepped into the store, it was like something changed.

it was all because karina had entered.

it was like everyone noticed her at once. the store wasn’t even that packed, but heads still turned. people’s eyes drifted from clothes to the tall, sharp featured girl who walked like she didn’t need to try. the world just shaped itself around her.

karina wore that black cropped tank top that was still tight and unfair. the silver belt made it look like it was made to show off her waist.

you didn’t notice the way you fell in step beside her until aeri leaned in.

“everyone’s staring. it’s like walking next to an off duty model.”

“off duty? karina hasn’t clocked out since birth.”

karina didn’t care about the compliments. she was too busy scanning the racks like she had a mission. and that mission, apparently, was you.

you didn’t even get to touch a single hanger.

“oh— welcome back miss yu.” a worker said, already straightening up.

“we’ll bring you both something to sip on.”

your eyes widened. “we get drinks?”

“it’s karina. you could get a couch in here if you asked nicely.” ning said from behind you.

karina turned around with a red dress dangling from her finger.

“try this on. she said, it wasn’t up for debate.

“you didn’t even check the size—”

“i looked at you.” karina tilted her head.

“what if it doesn’t even fit?” you said, cheeks warming up already.

“then we buy you the size that does.” she replied as if it was obvious.

“karina—”

“baby. i already made up my mind. this one’s yours.” she said and you swore your soul left your body for a moment.

“fine. but if i try something, you do too.” you mumbled.

“me?” karina raised a brow.

“yeah. fair’s fair.”

she stepped closer. “you just wanna see me undress.”

you choked. “no— i mean—”

“then say that, sweetheart.” karina smirked, taking a corset top and black skirt from the rack like she was humoring you.

you were in the dressing room, staring at yourself in the mirror with a dress so tight it was almost suffocating. it was red, strapless, and it clung to every curve you didn’t know you had.

your thoughts were a mess.

“karina, this is insane.” you called through the curtain.

“does it fit?” she replied.

“that’s not the issue!”

“then it’s perfect.”

you cracked the door open. “your turn.”

karina took the corset top and matching skirt from aeri. she disappeared into the stall next to you without even glancing back.

you tried not to listen. you really did.

but you could hear the rustle of fabric. and the sharp slide of the curtain.

and then—

“y/n.” her voice called.

“i need help with the zipper.”

you froze.

aeri and ning had wandered off somewhere to look at outfits.

so it was just you.

you stepped out of your stall, heart pounding in your chest. “you’re serious?”

“wouldn’t ask if i wasn’t.”

you pulled her curtain aside.

and your brain? it stopped working.

karina stood in front of the mirror in a black corset top that hugged her waist and the skirt hugged low on her hips. she was too hot for you. and your heart.

just beneath one of the ribs in her top you saw something peeking out.

it was a another tattoo.

not the spine one. not the collarbone one.

this one sat just under her chest, printed in fine black ink. it was unreadable but unfair.

your breath hitched.

“zip?” she asked half turned, watching you through the mirror.

you nodded stupidly, stepping in.

your fingers brushed the bare skin of her back as you carefully zipped her up.

“how many tattoos do you have?” your voice was barely above a whisper.

“three so far.”

your eyes glanced at the ink again. “this one’s older?”

“mhm. older than them all.”

your gaze met hers in the mirror.

your body temperature was suddenly too warm.

“your hands are shaking.” she said in a teasing tone.

“because you’re hot!” you blurted.

karina laughed before biting her lip. like she wasn’t currently ruining your ability to form a coherent thought.

she turned to face you fully with that teasing gaze still in her eyes. her voice was low. “so you admit it.”

“karina—”

“i’m buying this. and yours.”

“i haven’t even decided if i’m getting mine—”

karina stepped in until your space was hers. her hand came up, tilting your chin up until your eyes met hers.

“if you won’t wear it for you, then wear it for me.” she murmured.

“i like seeing you in things i picked out. is that so bad?”

you were helpless. and breathless.

it didn’t feel like just spoiling.

it felt like claiming.

“that’s not fair.” you whispered.

she smiled. like she already won.

“you didn’t answer.” she added.

“answer what?”

“do i look good?”

you didn’t even pretend to play it cool.

“you look… insane.” you said in a dazed tone.

karina smirked.

her hand dropped to your shoulder, fingers brushing lightly as she fixed the strap of your dress. it was so gentle that it made your stomach flip.

“you two better not be making out in there!” ning’s voice rang out from somewhere near the jewelry.

karina smiled.

“not yet.” she replied, eyes never leaving yours.

your knees genuinely almost buckled.

karina stepped back, finally giving you room to breathe. but the heat she left behind lingered on you. your hands were still trembling as you retreated to your own stall, trying to steady your pulse and ignore the flush creeping on your skin.

you somehow managed to change back into your clothes, and the red dress draped carefully over your arm like it was made of glass.

when you stepped out karina was already waiting. she was back in her black tank top and skirt, with her phone in one hand. she looked like she owned the store. she probably did.

you opened your mouth to say something just when ning came skipping around the corner with a glass of champagne in her hand and a pair of sunglasses that were definitely not hers.

“are you two done eye fucking in the fitting rooms or should i grab another drink?” she asked, taking a sip.

“it was one sided.” karina was unphased. as usual.

“it was not.” you hissed.

“awh! i love mutual delusion!” ning cooed.

aeri was behind her, holding three bags and a pair of stilettos that looked legally dangerous. “i’m ready.”

karina took both your dress and her outfit, slinging them over her arm.

the four of you strolled toward the register and the moment the cashier saw karina, her expression shifted from professional to terrified to mess up. like she already knew who she was.

“put it on my account,” karina said before the girl could even speak.

“you have an account here?” ning asked.

karina raised a brow. “don’t you?”

“no!”

you stood there, trying not to look out of place in a store where a single price tag could probably pay your rent. meanwhile, karina was taking black card out like it was nothing.

“did you want the jewelry as well?” the cashier asked politely, gesturing to a small tray of necklaces and rings karina had set down.

karina didn’t even glance at it. “all of it.”

your eyes widened. “wait—”

“let me.” karina said without looking at you.

you went quiet. you were stunned. and maybe just a little bit turned on.

the cashier handed karina the shopping bags with both of your outfits folded neatly inside, along with the jewelry in a smaller velvet pouch.

karina handed the pouch straight to you.

you stared.

“they’ll look better on you.” she said.

and then she walked off, sunglasses finally down over her eyes like she didn’t just buy you an outfit and jewelry without blinking.

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

“this is the last one,” ning groaned dragging her feet.

“i’m begging. starving. withering away.”

“you had champagne in the last three stores.” aeri reminded her, adjusting the stack of bags in her arms.

“champagne isn’t food. it’s a coping mechanism.” ning snapped.

“you had two glasses. in every store.”

“you’re not helping, babe.”

the four of you stepped into the final store. it was so clean and so quiet that it felt like even breathing too loud would cost money.

the employees were all beautiful and you were pretty sure you saw someone famous just casually browsing.

karina’s hand was already on the small of your back, steering you toward a rack of dresses.

“you’ll like these.” she mumbled, and she was right.

you glanced over your shoulder. ning had already zeroed in on the drink tray being passed around and grabbed a flute without even asking. aeri followed with no hesitation, sipping something sparkling while fully making eye contact with the most anxious employee nearby.

you, on the other hand, were kind of overwhelmed.

“karina. this is… insane.” you whispered.

“mm. try it on.” she said, grabbing a dress off the rack and holding it against you like she could already picture it.

you hesitated. “you’re not trying anything?”

“i’m not the one getting spoiled today.”

your face heated up. she said it so casually like you weren’t already fighting for your life every time she looked at you.

you disappeared into the dressing room before your knees gave out. and you didn’t notice her grab another dress.

the one she picked was black and silky. you’d barely finished zipping it when she called out softly.

“let me see.”

you cracked the door and peeked out.

karina was leaning against the wall across from you with her hands in her pockets, and it made your stomach do a thing. the look she gave you could’ve killed a victorian child.

“turn.” she said.

you did. slowly.

she tilted her head, biting back a smile.

“walk.”

“karina—”

“please?”

god.

you did. a few steps back and forth, pretending you weren’t walking straight into your downfall.

“what do you think?” you asked, trying to sound unaffected.

karina stepped forward. “it’s not the dress that i’m looking at.”

you were already flushed, ducking back inside. you were halfway into the second dress when you heard the voice behind you.

“need help zipping?” she asked lowly.

you almost died.

you turned to look at her just as karina slipped inside your dressing room like it was nothing.

“you—” you started, clearly panicked.

but she was already behind you, fingers brushing your spine carefully.

her voice was soft. “relax.”

you didn’t.

her hands ghosted up your back before adjusting the fabric with a precision that made you shiver. she wasn’t just zipping you up. she was watching. your every breath, your every twitch, and every timesucked in too sharply.

“you really like watching me suffer, don’t you?” you whispered.

“no. i like watching you fall.” she leaned in.

“fall for what?”

her smile curved against your skin. “you’ll see.”

the door creaked open suddenly.

“okay, i know you’re in there again—“ ning’s voice called out.

you jumped.

karina, who was unbothered, responded.

“we’re almost done.”

“you said that at the last store.”

aeri was sipping again, arms full of designer bags. “ning’s gonna start eating the mannequins.”

“i am!” ning shouted.

you stepped out finally, still struggling.

you watched karina’s expression shift from relaxed to focused. then focused to something darker and hungrier.

she was just staring. “you’re gonna kill me.” she said quietly.

your throat tightened. “it’s the dress, right?”

“no. it’s you in the dress.” she said.

you swallowed.

“you… can’t wear that around people.” she said, voice low.

“why not?”

“because i’m not trying to go to jail.”

“oh my god.” ning said.

karina looked at the nearest employee. “we’ll take this one.” the employee practically bowed. “we’ll wrap it for you.”

when you made it to the counter the cashier smiled, probably thinking you were just another couple with money to burn. but karina didn’t smile back.

she handed over her black card like it meant nothing again, eyes lazily looking between you and the total on the screen.

ning leaned over from behind and stage whispered loud enough for the whole line to hear.

“she was moaning over the price tag earlier but not when karina was practically eating her in the dressing room.”

your soul left your body.

the cashier stared. aeri choked on her gum. karina just smirked.

“oh my god. ning.” you hissed.

“what? i’m just saying. karina spends and y/n bends.”

“stop talking.” you begged, face already ten shades of red.

karina grabbed the bagged clothes with one hand then handed it to aeri.

“let her talk. she’s not wrong.” she murmured near your ear.

you nearly died on the spot.

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

the brunch spot was the kind of place you only visited to take pictures in.

aeri ordered like she’d been here before.

ning ordered like she owned the place.

“and three mimosas. just to start.”

two were for her.

karina didn’t even look at the menu. she looked at you.

“get whatever you want.” she said softly, making you fold instantly.

you were still recovering from the dressing room.

and the walk here. where she held your waist the whole time and dared anyone to look at you too long.

you were just starting to feel normal again, laughing at aeri complaining about her mimosa and taking a bite of ning’s food without asking when your phone buzzed.

jiwon

hey. you should know something before school tomorrow.

your stomach dropped.

there no context. no follow-up.

just that.

your fingers hovered over your screen for a second before you typed fast.

you

what are you talking about?

you stared at your phone.

you didn’t realize your expression shifted until karina nudged you with her foot under the table.

“you okay?” she asked.

you nodded too quickly. “yeah. just— just got a weird text.”

karina didn’t press. she already knew that something was off.

you opened up your text with minjeong.

you

minjeong

jiwon texted me

[one attachment]

your appetite disappeared.

“you sure you’re good?” aeri asked.

“yeah.” you lied, setting your phone face down.

they continued to talk and laugh.

but your chest felt tight.

you tried to stay present.

you really did.

but the second you flipped your phone down, the energy shifted for you. your mind kept spinning. what did jiwon mean? why now? and why send that kind of text without explaining?

karina didn’t take her eyes off you once since you read it.

“you sure?” she asked again, quieter this time.

you nodded, managing a weak smile.

“mhm. promise.”

but your knee was bouncing under the table and karina clocked it immediately.

she leaned back just, draping along the back of the booth behind you. her thumb grazed the top of your shoulder.

it was subtle and protective.

she didn’t touched her food much. she was too busy watching you.

your phone buzzed again.

you didn’t dare to look. not with karina watching. not with her sitting so close.

but she was mid sentence. anxiety was eating you out from the inside and it made you hopeful.

so you flipped your phone over. subtly.

jiwon

i never sent anything in anonymously. that wasn’t me.

your heart dropped.

karina was still mid-sentence, but her eyes cut to your screen for a second.

just one second.

you angled it away instinctively.

but it was too late.

“everything okay?” she asked in a soft voice. but there was something sharper under it now. you couldn’t name what it was.

you forced a smile.

“yeah. just… texting minjeong.”

she tilted her head and the corner of her mouth twitched upward. “minjeong?”

you nodded, thumbs already typing out a quick message before you could stop yourself.

you

minjeonggggg

i need you

the moment it delivered, karina leaned over and gently kissed your temple.

“be right back.” she murmured.

“where are you going?” you asked, trying to keep your tone even.

“bathroom.” she didn’t wait for you to respond. just turned and walked off with the same effortless grace that made everyone stop and stare.

you stared down at your screen. it was still unread.

“she’s gonna find out, you know.” ning said suddenly.

your head snapped up. “what?”

“whatever it is. karina’s not stupid. if anything, i’d say she knows everything.” aeri sipped her mimosa.

“you’re acting like i’m hiding something.”

“we’re just saying. karina doesn’t miss much.” ning sang.

“plus she already saw your screen.” aeri added.

“you might as well just tell her before she finds out on her own. she’ll like it better.”

you weren’t sure if it was a warning or advice.

maybe it was both.

but then you remembered the message.

jiwon’s message.

“i never sent anything in anonymously.”

that meant someone else had. someone who knew.

your stomach twisted.

and before you could talk yourself out of it, you typed to jiwon.

you

who is yujin?

you barely had time to process the weight of what you just sent when you saw the text wasn’t delivered.

blocked.

you stared with cold blooming in your chest.

karina returned a few seconds later, sliding back into her seat like nothing happened. her hand brushed your thigh beneath the table.

“you okay?” she asked, smiling.

and you smiled back.

but you had no idea if it reached your eyes.

the car ride back was thick with silence.

it was too quiet.

aeri and ning had stayed behind for dessert. it was something about a mochi place that was trending on instagram, but ning reassured the two of you that her ‘lil shit’ would pick them up.

karina drove with one hand on the wheel and the other resting idly on the center console like nothing was wrong.

like she hadn’t seen the name yujin flicker across your screen.

you haven’t said anything since. but it was eating at you. the silence. the question. the fact that jiwon blocked you the second you texted.

you looked over at karina, voice lower than you meant. “who’s yujin?”

she didn’t even blink.

her mouth curved, but it wasn’t a smile. it was something quieter.

a knowing kind of tilt.

“i figured you’d get there eventually.” she said softly.

your throat tightened. “so?”

karina turned to look at you briefly. her tone was gentle.

“don’t worry about it, princess.”

the car hummed.

you stared at her, but she didn’t elaborate.

it felt like a promise.

when she pulled up in front of your place, she didn’t say goodbye. she just looked at you.

“i’ll see you soon.” she murmured.

you stepped out with a shaky breath and the door shut behind you quietly.

you bit your lip.

first period felt off from the beginning. karina’s seat was still empty.

you weren’t used to that.

she was usually early on time. but today? the silence she left behind felt heavier than usual. and you were already on edge.

minjeong was two rows ahead, slouched low in her chair. but when the teacher turned to write something on the board, she moved in her seat just enough to glance back at you. then she passed a folded note along the edge of the desk.

you opened it under your book.

"didn’t see jiwon on the bus. she hasn’t answered me either."

your fingers tightened around the paper.

your eyes flicked up toward the door again as if somehow she’d be there now.

no one came.

you pulled out your phone under the desk and quickly typed out a message to minjeong.

you don’t think… karina—

before you could hit send—

the door creaked open.

your head snapped up.

karina walked in with an unreadable expression. her jaw was tight and she handed a late pass to the teacher without a word.

she didn’t even look at you until she was sitting.

she leaned in slightly, voice low.

“you didn’t get much sleep last night.”

your blood chilled.

your stomach dropped.

no one knew that. you didn’t text it to anyone. you just laid there in bed, tossing and turning while your brain tried to put together jiwon’s text, her disappearance, and yujin.

“how do you know that?” you asked.

karina smiled, the corners of her mouth curving.

her thumb reached out, brushing underneath your eye gently.

“the eyebags. they’re kind of cute.” she murmured.

you should’ve laughed.

but your heart was beating a little too fast and your skin felt a little too hot.

she turned her gaze forward like nothing happened.

you stared at her, the memory of her hand against your cheek still tingling.

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

lunch rolled around, but it didn’t feel like a break.

your head was still spinning from history class. jiwon’s name wasn’t called on the roster. at first, you thought maybe she was just late, but the teacher didn’t even pause. like she wasn’t supposed to be there in the first place.

you were walking with minjeong toward the courtyard when you heard someone whisper behind you.

“she moved schools. out of nowhere.”

“i heard her parents pulled her. like, literally overnight.”

you didn’t even realize you’d stopped walking until minjeong tugged lightly on your sleeve.

“y/n?” she asked. her voice was quiet.

your mouth felt dry. “did you hear that?”

minjeong nodded slowly. “something’s wrong. i just… i know she wouldn’t leave like that without saying anything.”

your heart twisted. you knew how close they were, or they used to be. and now jiwon was gone. just like that.

“she didn’t even say goodbye. not even a text.” minjeong whispered.

before you could respond, a familiar warmth grazed your wrist.

karina.

she appeared beside you like she had always been there, her fingers brushing.

there was a small silver chain around her neck that you’d never seen before.

“you weren’t at the table.” she said softly, her smile unreadable.

“we were just— um— walking.”

her gaze moved briefly to minjeong, then back to you.

“come with me.” she said, her tone not exactly a request.

you looked at minjeong, hesitant.

she shook her head before you could speak. “it’s fine. i’ve got somewhere to be.”

you nodded, swallowing your guilt and letting karina guide you by the hand to her table.

“you missed first period.” aeri said to ning.

“i’m in my delinquent era.”

karina rolled her eyes then reached into her bag and pulled something out. a small, velvet box.

your brows lifted. “what’s this?”

she opened it. inside was a delicate silver bracelet with multiple diamonds.

she was still spoiling you.

“i had it made.” she said softly like it wasn’t a big deal.

she was still spoiling you.

you blinked. “karina— ”

“don’t.” she took your wrist before you could react and fastened the clasp herself. her fingers were steady.

“it looks good on you.”

your brain stopped.

“you really didn’t have to—”

“i wanted to.”

ning made a gagging noise.

“you guys are disgusting. in a cute way, but still. disgusting.”

aeri smirked. “she’s just mad she hasn’t gotten her matching bracelet yet.”

“i want a matching necklace, actually.” ning said.

you tried to hide your flustered face behind your hand but karina caught your wrist again, turning it to admire the bracelet on your wrist.

then ning spoke again.

“sooo. did you hear about jiwon?”

karina just tilted her head, her thumb still brushing your pulse.

“what about her?”

“she left. like, gone gone. moved schools outta nowhere. no warning. it’s kinda sus, right?”

aeri raised a brow. “i thought she was besties with that other girl.”

karina gave a light laugh.

“i guess she won’t be getting that rain check.” she said, voice dripping with something too smooth to be innocent.

you tensed.

her words were so casual. her fingers didn’t leave your wrist.

and when you looked at her she was already smiling.

like she didn’t just say something that sent chills down your spine.

“one day she’s here, the next she’s just… poof. there was no goodbye, no story, not even a last-minute rumor. that’s not how people leave this school. not without someone knowing.”

karina let out a small hum beside you, like she was interested but already had the ending to the story.

“she probably had her reasons.” aeri offered.

ning leaned in across the table with a conspiratorial voice. “okay but what if she didn’t leave voluntarily?”

you tensed.

karina’s eyes cut to yours. she was amused.

“why so tense, baby?” she asked.

you glanced away too quickly and caught it.

sunghoon, a couple tables over, was laughing with his friends when his eyes briefly focused on you. and then he smiled.

it was enough to make your stomach flip. it was the type that would’ve felt sweet if you weren’t sitting next to karina.

because she noticed.

of course she noticed.

her hand that was resting casually on your thigh under the table tensed slightly.

you looked back at her, startled by how unreadable her expression was.

“i’m not tense.” you said.

“you are.” she murmured, thumb brushing over your leg.

“it’s okay. i’d be nervous too if someone disappeared right after betraying me.”

you froze.

“i didn’t— she didn’t betray me.” you started, voice catching.

karina tilted her head. “didn’t she?”

her stare was magnetic. she was smiling but something behind her eyes sparkled with knowing.

she was still tracking sunghoon’s glance like it was carved into her eyelids.

aeri was unaware. ning, unfortunately, was not.

“you two weren’t that close, right?” ning asked

“i mean, i thought she was tight with minjeong, but…”

“she was. they were.”

ning’s brows raised like she just realizing something. “wait. minjeong didn’t mention anything, did she?”

you didn’t answer.

which was all ning needed.

“oh. damn.”

“let it go. we’re talking about someone who left. let her stay gone.”

ning smiled, slow and shark like.

“right, right. my bad. guess i just love a good mystery.”

“you would be terrible in a whodunit. you would expose the killer just for fun.” aeri said, sipping her drink.

“only if the killer’s hot.”

karina laughed.

then she leaned toward you again, her voice barely above a whisper.

“you’re thinking too hard.”

“i’m not.”

“you are. relax. you’re safe.”

you turned to face her, heart pounding.

“are you saying that because you want me to feel safe, or because you know i am?”

her smile widened, lazy and slow, like she knew something you didn’t. her hand moved up your thigh subtly.

“both.”

then she leaned back like nothing happened.

across the table, ning raised her eyebrows. “damn, i still want whatever weird love potion she used on you.”

karina smiled.

“no potion. just luck.”

and maybe a little bit of control.

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

you didn’t mean to hang out with them after school. really.

but one minute you were walking out with every intention of hanging with minjeong and the next, aeri had her arm around your shoulder while dragging you towards karina’s black car.

you sat on the edge of the couch, guilt tugging at your chest. minjeong had only sent a “k” when you texted about changing plans and it stung more than it should’ve. you felt like you owed her something. but karina was sitting beside you now, watching you like she already knew every thought.

“tell me what’s on your mind.” she said softly.

you tried to shrug it off. “nothing.”

“you can’t lie to me.” she murmured.

you turned to look at her, and she was already closer than you realized.

“i’ll say it again. you don’t have to pretend around me. i don’t like it when you pretend.” she added.

maybe it was the way she said it. or the way her voice was grounding you.

“i’m starting to think you might be insane.”

karina smiled.

it was a soft one this time.

“but you like it.”

you didn’t answer. you didn’t need to.

she reached out and brushed a strand of hair behind your ear. “i’ve never let anyone get this close.”

you swallowed. “that’s not true.”

“it is. not since—”

she stopped herself. and then, instead of finishing, she leaned forward and kissed you.

your eyes fluttered closed on instinct.

it started like a question. gentle, like she was waiting for you to push her away.

you didn’t.

you kissed her back. and when she moved a little closer with a hand curling at the back of your neck, you let her.

the couch creaked under you. her thumb grazed your jaw and she kissed you again, deeper this time. and then her lips trailed to the corner of your mouth, then to your cheek, and then lower.

your breath caught when she kissed beneath your ear.

then under the edge of your jaw.

“karina—“ escaped your lips before you could stop it.

she paused there. lips against your skin, with a ghosting smile.

and then she whispered. “it’s jimin.”

you stared.

“what?”

she pulled back just enough to meet your gaze. “my real name. i thought you should know.”

yoh stared at her, heart still pounding in your chest.

“why now?” you asked quietly.

“because you say my name like it means something. and i want it to be the right one.”

you were still trying to process it.

jimin, jimin, jimin.

then her phone buzzed on the coffee table beside you.

she glanced at the screen.

then declined the call. too fast.

you didn’t get to see the contact.

“everything okay?” you asked, breathless from more than just the kiss.

she gave you a soft smile. “yeah. just my mom. i’ll be right back.”

you watched her disappear down the hallway and past the kitchen. ning was arguing with aeri about “borrowing” a bracelet from karina’s jewelry drawer but it all faded into the background as you slowly stood up.

then you heard her voice again from an almost closed door.

“no. i told you. i’m handling it.”

silence. then softer, almost broken.

“i can’t lose her like i lost yujin.”

your body went still.

you didn’t even realize you were holding your breath until your lungs started to ache.

yujin.

there it was again. that name. that secret.

and now, suddenly, it wasn’t just curiosity

it was dread.

you heard her footsteps before you saw her.

soft and steady.

you didn’t move when she stepped back into the room, but your body tensed. like it knew she was near before your mind caught up.

karina was quiet as she sat beside you again, her perfume infesting the air and claiming the space all over again. her thigh brushed yours, fingers reaching for your hand.

“sorry about that. my mom needed something.” she said softly.

you nodded too quickly. “no worries.”

and that was your first mistake.

because karina turned her head slightly toward you and her voice dropped. velvet and sharp.

“what did you hear?”

your stomach dropped.

“i— what?”

karina didn’t push. she only tilted her head like she was looking through you, not at you.

“it’s not a bad thing.” she said softly.

“you’re just a little quiet now.”

you swallowed. “just thinking.”

that was your second mistake.

her hand lifted and brushed the side of your neck. then her thumb caught the edge of your jaw.

“i know who you’re thinking about.”

your breath caught.

she said it like a dare.

you didn’t nod or speak. but your silence was a yes.

her thumb traced under your eye and you swore she could feel your pulse under her fingers.

“you’re a terrible liar, baby.” she whispered.

“i didn’t mean to— i just overheard—” your voice broke.

“i know.” she hushed you instantly, forehead brushing against yours.

“but now you know how much you matter to me.”

her hand curved around your jaw and tilted your face just so your eyes met hers again.

“i lost someone before. it won’t happen again.” she said, voice barely audible.

you felt her words more than you heard them. you felt it everywhere in your body.

she leaned in and kissed your cheek softly.

then your temple.

then the corner of your mouth.

“i won’t lose you.” she murmured, and this time it felt like a promise with weight to it.

like a vow.

you were still trying to breathe when her lips grazed your ear.

“you’re mine, right?”

your lips parted. “karina—”

“say yes.”

and when you didn’t answer, she kissed you.

it wasn’t urgent.

it was slow.

like she had all the time in the world to unravel you.

when she pulled back, your whole body felt light.

ning’s voice rang out from the living room.

“if no one’s picking a movie, i’m making us watch the notebook again!”

you were still in a daze, heart thudding from the way karina had kissed you like she already owned the part of you you were still trying to understand.

aeri groaned. “i swear to god, ning—”

you stood, slow and little unsteady, your skin still tingled. you didn’t even make it a full step before—

her hand wrapped around your wrist.

“wait.”

you turned.

karina sat there on the couch, legs pulled up and hoodie sleeves too long past her wrists. for once, she didn’t look like the girl who had the entire school wrapped around her finger. she didn’t look like the untouchable center of the universe, or the beautiful girl who whispered your name like a secret. she just looked…

soft?

her hair was a little messy from your hands and her lips were pink and slightly swollen from the kisses you just shared.

and when she looked up at you, there was no teasing glint in her eyes.

it was something she’d never let anyone else see.

“can’t we stay in a little longer?” she asked, quieter this time.

and it wasn’t about the others. it wasn’t about the movie.

it was about you. about the fact that something in her unraveled when it was just the two of you. something she didn’t let anyone else close enough to see.

your heart broke a little in the best way.

she looked down for a second, fingers curled around your wrist. “just for a minute. just you and me.” she added.

you sat back down.

her hand was still on you.

“i can’t say no to you even if i wanted to.”

“you’re not supposed to.”

you didn’t know how to look at her. you didn’t know how to not look at her.

and then she leaned in again, forehead resting gently against yours. her eyes fluttered like this was the only place she could breathe.

you swallowed, barely holding it together.

“you okay?”

she nodded after a while, but it was slow. like she didn’t trust her voice yet. “i just… i don’t get this feeling with anyone else.” her voice broke a little.

you folded. completely.

your chest ached and your hands moved on their own, sliding up to cup her face.

“you make me insane.” you whispered.

karina laughed under her breath. she opened her eyes.

“i win.” she said, quieter this time.

you smiled helplessly. “win what?”

she leaned forward until her nose brushed yours. “whatever game you think we’re playing.”

there was that again.

you didn’t answer.

you couldn’t.

because you knew that she wasn’t playing.

and for once, neither were you.

karina sighed, already standing. but she reached for your hand like it was instinct.

then fingers laced with yours.

“come on.” she said.

you followed her out.

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

ning had already claimed the comfiest spot on the couch, mystery drink in one hand and the tv remote in the other. she was wearing fuzzy socks, phone lighting up every few seconds.

aeri was stretched out across the floor with a pillow under her head, scrolling through tiktok and arguing with ning about everything.

“we’re not watching a movie where the guy literally dies in the rain, ning.”

“he dies in the bedroom, aeri. after loving her for like sixty years.”

you stepped in with karina still holding your hand, and they both looked up for one second.

aeri smirked. “took you long enough.”

karina cut in before you could say anything.

“y/n needed help with something. zippers are hard.” she said, so sweet it made your pulse stutter.

ning choked on her drink. “excuse me?!”

you turned, ready to hit karina with a you did not just say that, but she was already plopping down onto and crossing her legs like nothing happened. she tugged you down next to her, hand still warm around yours. her arm brushed your shoulder like a secret no one else was allowed to know.

ning leaned closer with a wicked gaze.

“you two are freaks.”

“romantic freaks.” aeri corrected.

“lovers.” ning said.

karina smiled, resting her chin on your shoulder like it belonged there.

aeri finally tossed her phone down. “listen! movie time. i’m not sitting through another failed vote.”

“i already said the notebook—” ning started.

“and we said no. too soft. we need violence. blood. screaming.”

“that’s… a shift.”

“i want to see people running for their lives, babes. scream. classic. camp. a cultural reset.”

“i agree. the notebook is too straight.” karina said.

ning groaned. “you are so gay.”

aeri sat up, suddenly way too enthusiastic.

“uh uh. you cannot tell me ghostface isn’t hilarious. and iconic. and hot. scream is literally a comfort movie.”

“comfort?? people die.” you asked.

“exactly. makes my problems feel small.”

“i don’t mind. i’ve seen worse things before.” karina hummed.

ning turned to you with a dramatic gasp.

“is she talking about you?”

you shoved a pillow at her.

karina just laughed, pulling you in. her arm slipped behind you on the couch, fingers lightly brushing against your shoulder.

“let her pick it. it’s her first group movie night.” karina said.

“wait— me?”

three pairs of eyes turned on you. karina tilted her head, curious.

you swallowed. “uhh… something scary is fine?”

aeri smiled.

“this is why i fuck with you.”

“i’d hate to have to hold you if you get scared.” karina laughed.

“you would love to hold me.” you gave her a look.

“guilty.”

ning clicked the remote, scrolling. “okay, whatever, scream it is.”

the movie started and the room dimmed.

you leaned into karina and her thumb was now lazily brushing your arm. she didn’t flinch at anything. of course she didn’t.

halfway through the first kill, you felt her lean in.

“you’re blushing again.” she whispered, lips barely brushing your ear.

you couldn’t help it.

because even while ghostface chased teenagers around in a suburban house, all you could focus on was her.

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

the movie ended in a mess of blood with the credits rolling. ning was laid out across the couch dramatically, half sleeping.

aeri was halfway into her phone, texting with one hand. “that was not scary.” she mumbled.

but karina hadn’t moved.

she was still beside you, elbow resting on the back of the couch behind you. her fingers grazed the edge of your shoulder.

you turned to look at her.

“be honest. you hated it.”

she smiled without looking at you, her eyes still on the credits. “i didn’t hate it.”

you raised a brow.

“i liked watching you more. you get all quiet when you’re scared.” she added, turning to meet your gaze.

“that’s because i’m trying not to scream.” you scoffed.

karina tilted her head while smirking. “you can scream around me.”

your heart was stuttering.

“karina—”

“you always say my name like it’s a question. like you’re not sure i’m real.” she murmured, brushing a strand of your hair behind your ear.

“sometimes i’m not.” you admitted.

that made her pause.

she studied you, eyes unreadable, then sat back a little to really look at you.

and then her hand, the one resting near your shoulder, moved with her fingertips trailing gently across your collarbone like she was drawing a shape only she could see. her thumb brushed the strap of your top.

“you don’t show this side to anyone else, do you?” you asked, half whisper.

karina smiled. “no.”

and there was something about the way she said it. it was honest. and maybe a little scared.

you didn’t even realize you were leaning in until your nose brushed hers.

“i like you like this.” you murmured.

her breath hitched and then her lips were on yours, gentler than you expected.

you could never get enough of her lips.

she didn’t pull away, mouth moving to your jaw, then your neck, leaving soft, slow kisses down to your collarbone like she wasn’t in a rush.

like she was memorizing you.

your fingers found the hem of her shirt, anchoring yourself.

she kissed your shoulder once more then pulled back just enough to meet your eyes.

“you’re dangerous.” you whispered.

karina smiled “i know.”

then ning called out from the kitchen, “if you’re making out again, at least wait until i’m asleep!”

you jumped. karina didn’t react.

she just looked up at you with a gaze that made your heart stop and reached for your wrist.

you stood first, dizzy with affection, and she gently tugged you back.

and of course you obeyed.

you rode with karina to school the next morning.

“you’re staring.” she said, tone light.

“i wasn’t.” you lied. obviously.

she smirked, one hand drifting from the wheel to rest on your knee.

“you were.”

you didn’t deny it this time. you were still a little dizzy from last night. from the way she said ‘can’t we stay a little longer.’ from the way she kissed you. from the way her voice dropped when she called you baby.

karina slowed the car, parking into her usual spot out front because of course she parked like she owned the school. a few students glanced over, taking mental notes who was in the car with her this morning. you weren’t imagining the change in attention.

and then— sunghoon.

he looked up as karina changed the gearshift into park, expression freezing the moment your eyes met. the moment he saw her.

he straightened instantly. paled even.

then bowed.

like a full ninety-degree ‘i fear for my life’ type of bow.

karina smiled slowly with her sunglasses still on. one hand draped casually over the steering wheel. “cute.”

you didn’t even have time to ask what that was about before she was opening your door for you like a chauffeur.

“come on.” she said smoothly, eyes falling to your lips for just a second.

she always made it feel like walking beside her was a privilege.

like being with her meant something dangerous.

and judging by the way people stared as you walked into school with her, they knew it too.

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

you spotted minjeong near the lockers with her hoodie half zipped and earbuds tucked into her collar.

she looked up right as you stepped away from karina’s side.

“i’ll be right back.” you said, already moving.

karina caught your wrist.

her thumb brushed the inside of your pulse as if she was memorizing the rhythm. “where are you going?” she asked, head tilting like a puppy.

except a puppy wouldn’t be wearing tinted dior lenses and a diamond studded earring.

you glanced at minjeong again. “to talk to her.”

“…now?”

you tried not to smile. “yeah. now.”

karina didn’t let go just yet. her pout was so slight and so subtle that you almost missed it. “i was gonna walk you to class.”

“i’ll only be a minute.”

she let your wrist go with a sigh that was a little too dramatic to be serious.

“fine. one minute. sixty seconds. that’s it.” she said.

you shot her a look. “are you gonna time me?”

“i’ve already started.” she said. “fifty nine.”

you rolled your eyes and turned toward minjeong who had absolutely seen all of that.

she didn’t say anything right away. her jaw was tight like she had been holding something in too long.

you leaned against the locker beside hers.

“hey.”

“hey. you still haven’t seen her real side, huh?” she said.

“what do you mean?”

minjeong didn’t look at you.

“you know what i mean.” she mumbled.

“karina doesn’t just let people in. she chooses. and when she does it’s not always a good thing.”

you shifted uncomfortably. “she’s been sweet, actually.”

minjeong looked at you now, finally. and her eyes were tired.

“she’s been obsessive. that’s how it starts.” she said.

you tried to speak but her next question caught you off guard.

“have you heard from jiwon?”

you shook your head, guilt creeping in.

“she blocked me.”

minjeong furrowed her eyebrows.

“she what?”

“she blocked me after i asked her about yujin. i haven’t heard anything since.” you admit.

minjeong looked like she was doing math in her head.

your throat felt tight. “you think karina—?”

minjeong shut her eyes for a moment. “i think you need to be careful. that’s all i’m saying.”

you were about to respond when karina appeared with a smile on her face.

“time’s up.”

you groaned.

“unbelievable.” minjeong mumbled.

the smile told you that she heard all of it.

“ready?” karina asked, already matching your stride without waiting for an answer.

you nodded. and she didn’t take your hand this time. just brushed her fingers against yours.

you glanced up at her, trying to read her face. but she was unreadable in the way that made your chest flutter. calm, composed, and a little too quiet.

“you’re distracted.” she said after a few steps.

“she asked about jiwon.”

karina didn’t answer. not right away. but you could see the smile tug at the corner of her mouth, like she knew you would bring it up. like she was waiting for it.

“i’m gonna stop by the counselor’s office.” she said instead.

“why?”

“finishing something up.”

you stopped walking. she took one more step before turning back toward you.

there was something in her eyes now. the kind of look that made your breath catch even when she wasn’t saying anything.

she leaned in close with a low voice.

“you should tell minjeong to be careful, too.”

your heart thudded once, hard.

“…karina?”

but she just smiled like she didn’t just say something vaguely threatening.

“don’t look at me like that. i’m being good.” she said, brushing your hair behind your ear gently.

“you’re being cryptic.”

“i’m being considerate.” she corrected.

then she leaned in. "you don’t want me to show you what not being good looks like.”

you knew she was teasing. mostly. but it still made your knees weak.

and then, like nothing had happened, she stepped back.

“i’ll see you at lunch. don’t miss me too much.” she said with a soft little smirk as she turned. you stood there for a bit too long, dizzy with affection and dread equally. and the worst part? you already missed her.

taglist — @saysirhc @prologue-ae @yuyuy90 (@spidrgamer @sh1ba100 @1800hotnfunn)

#wanna make you mine — yjm #aespa #aespa imagines #aespa x fem reader #aespa x reader #aespa karina #aespa yu jimin #karina x fem reader #karina x reader #karina imagines #yu jimin x reader #yu jimin #wlw #wlw post #long reads #long fic #divider © to v6lia

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lascvitae · 1 month ago

Text

WANNA MAKE YOU MINE³ ✵ YU JIMIN.

❀ ༉ ‧ ₊ ˚ alt. I WANNA STRING YOU OUT,

I WANNA MAKE YOU MINE .ᐟ

ᝰ.ᐟ y/n plans to flip the power, but karina’s silence isn’t part of the plan. and when she finally speaks, it’s not what y/n expects.

part one. part two. part three.

ᝰ.ᐟ pairing. karina x fem!reader ᝰ.ᐟ genre. angst, fluff, strangers to lovers ᝰ.ᐟ warning(s). cursing, arguing, underage drinking, obsession and possession, manipulation, not toxic if its hot (it’s toxic), y/n is ceo of i can fix her, it’s kinda dramatic for no reason

ᝰ.ᐟ wc 20k (sorry for yapping…)

ᝰ.ᐟ katty hiii guys it’s finally here (pretending like it isn’t 5 am) but i hope you guys like it <3 i rewrote it like 4 times bc i didn’t like it but i’m kinda satisfied w this ending (i lowk feel like its ahh 🥀) also we’re sooo back i graduate monday n i’ll be working on requests next ++ it’s so crazy how i’m close to 900 alr OKAY enjoy

masterlist.

FIRST PERIOD WAS ALMOST A BLUR. you slid into your seat beside minjeong, biting your bottom lip lightly. she looked over at you, brow furrowed in quiet concern. “you good?”

“do i look good?”

“you look like you got hit by the karina train.” she said, making you groan. you folded your arms on the desk and dropped your head. “i don’t know how much longer i can do this. she has a comeback for everything, minjeong. it’s like she studied me before i even got here.”

minjeong didn’t laugh. she just sat quietly for a moment before speaking. “she probably did.” you lifted your head up enough to look at her. “not helping.”

“i’m just saying. she has a phd in obsession but you know that by now. girl is trying to own you.” she shrugged and you sighed. “she’s already halfway there.” minjeong leaned in, resting her chin on her hand. “so… you’re gonna fold?”

you hesitated. “no. i wanna flip the script. i know she’s hiding everything.” that got her attention. her eyebrows rose. “you wanna make karina blush?”

“i didn’t say that. i just want her to… i don’t know. i wanna see what happens when she doesn’t have control.” you paused. “i need her to show me who she really is.” minjeong tilted her head slightly. “what do you mean?”

you looked down at your desk, voice softer. “i want to know what happened. with jiwon. with yujin. with everything. i can’t ask her. she’d twist it or avoid it. but if i make her slip… maybe i’ll finally get the truth.”

“so you’re not just trying to win.”

“no. i just need her to be real with me. i think part of her wants that too, but she doesn’t know how.” minjeong’s expression softened. “that’s… kinda beautiful.”

“don’t get soft on me now.” you joked weakly.

“sorry— okay. then we flip the script around.”

“and if she falls?” you asked.

“she will. but when she does, you gotta look her in the eye and let her feel it.” minjeong said quietly. you felt your chest swell with something warm and electric. “i want her to actually like me. not just want me.”

minjeong watched you carefully. “she already does. she just doesn’t know how to say it yet.” you exhaled.

“okay.” you whispered.

“alright. if we’re gonna do this, you need to stop acting like you’re surprised every time she breathes near you.” you rolled your eyes. “i’m not that bad.”

“you stuttered when she handed you a napkin. first rule. don’t react first. let her flinch. let her look for your reaction and find none. you stay calm and mysterious like you already know what she’s going to do next.”

“you mean act like her?”

“exactly. be the mirror. let her see herself and it’ll drive her crazy. second, start giving her what she gives you. the little touches, the looks. but make it obvious that you’re doing it on purpose. following?”

“like when i fed her that one time?”

“yes, but crank it all the way up. you want her to be the one biting her lip this time.”

“okay. got it.”

“third, don’t be afraid to pull back sometimes. make her come to you. show her she’s not the only one who can leave someone wanting.” you paused at that, glancing down at your notebook full of notes. “you’ve really thought about this.”

minjeong shrugged. “i had to learn it the hard way.” you looked up at her. “how do you know her so well?”

“i used to be in love with her.” she said as if it were obvious.

“oh. right.” it kinda was. “yeah. it was back when she didn’t know what to do with someone who actually cared. i was dumb. thought i could be the exception.”

you felt guilt and understanding stir in your chest. “i’m sorry.” you murmured.

“don’t be.” the teacher begins the lesson before you can reply.

──────────౨ৎ───────────

the bell rings. you barely register it until minjeong nudges your arm.

“hey. study session at my place after school?”

you nod. “yeah. thanks, minjeong.“

you gather your things with calm, measured movements. no rushing. no nerves. you already know she’s waiting.

you step into the hallway and there she is.

karina’s leaning against your locker arms crossed and phone in one hand. her expression is unreadable but the second her eyes meet yours, the corners of her mouth twitch. you slow your pace just enough to make her eyes narrow.

“hey, stranger. only took you one period to forget what i look like?” she says. you try not to smile, keeping your face calm. then you tilted your head.

“you’re hard to forget.” you said lightly. you stood in front of her now. closer than you needed to be.

“were you waiting long?” you asked.

“long enough.” her voice was smooth but something behind it had shifted. there was a pause and her eyes dropped to your mouth and you caught it. barely. before they flicked back up.

“walk me to class?” you asked, almost teasing. “…unless you have other plans.”

“no. i don’t.” she said slowly.

“then let’s go.” you started walking before she could say anything else. and this time, she followed. the hallway moved around you in waves. everyone was noticing karina but you both ignored it. she walked beside you, composed as usual. she always looked like she was heading somewhere important. even when she was just following you. you didn’t rush. you just walked steadily.

“you’re quiet. thinking about me?” she said, glancing over. you hummed. “you want me to be?”

“always.”

you turned your head just slightly, your expression unreadable. and then without a word, you reached over and slid your fingers between hers. you didn’t look at her, didn’t squeeze her hand. you just held it like it was nothing. karina’s eyes were on you now. you felt the sharp heat of her attention flickering across your face. she didn’t say anything.

you finally glanced her way. “no comment?”

“you don’t usually do that.”

“maybe you don’t know what i usually do.”

you felt her smile before you saw it. “is this a new phase?”

you looked ahead again, unfazed. “maybe i’m just tired of playing it safe.”

“careful. i might start thinking you’re in love with me.” she murmured.

you shrugged. “is that a bad thing?”

“for everyone else.”

you bit your lip. “good thing i just want you then.” karina let out a soft laugh. it was barely more than a breath, but it was real. then, like nothing had happened, she kept walking with the same pace, grip tightened just slightly around your hand.

“careful. you’re starting to sound dangerous.” she said again, her voice lower now.

"guess i’m finally learning from the best.”

“hm. so you admit it.”

“i never said i didn’t.” she hummed again, but it was different this time. it was warmer.

“don’t think i won’t test you.”

“don’t think i won’t pass.” and she smiled. but she didn’t let go.

──────────౨ৎ───────────

the lunch bell came sooner than you expected. aeri was sitting across from you, already mid rant. "i swear, i hate school. especially lunch. it’s always the same. same food, same people, same boring ass conversations. i’m ready to just skip it and go home.”

ning rolled her eyes dramatically. “you’re just mad because your salad is a sad excuse for one. i told you to get the chicken wrap but you never listen.”

aeri glared at ning. “whatever. i don’t care! i’m about to leave.” she searched for her car keys. karina didn’t seem interested in the conversation. she wasn’t even looking at aeri or ning. she was watching you with the same calculating gaze, the one that made you feel like she knew every thought in your head before you even thought it.

“every time i try to get closer, you pull back.” she said. her smile was barely there but it was undeniably sly. you could feel aeri’s eyes darting between you and karina. you leaned in slightly, enough to close the gap between you. “maybe i’m just trying to figure you out. you’re not exactly the easiest person to read." karina’s gaze flickered at that, but she didn't say anything yet. instead, she leaned back in her seat like she was studying you, waiting for you to make your next move. so that’s when you did it.

without warning, you slid your hand across the table to barely brushing her fingers. she raised an eyebrow. "nevermind. i take it back. i love lunch. god bless private schools.” aeri chimed in. karina was now looking at you with a little more intensity than before. there was something unreadable in her gaze. then after a moment, her curled into a subtle smirk. something in her was definitely interested now. and maybe, she was starting to wonder how far you were willing to take it. for now though, you’re gonna keep her guessing. just like she kept you guessing.

──────────౨ৎ───────────

the final bell rang but your brain had already clocked out twenty minutes ago. you barely had time to shove your stuff into your bag before you stepped into the hallway and saw her. she was leaning against the lockers like she had been waiting since second period. her bag was slung over one shoulder and her hair was perfect. expression unreadable but so her.

“walk with me?” she asked, already turning like she knew you’d say yes. you did. of course you did.

“i was thinking… you should come back to mine. we can study. or not.” she said casually as the two of you made your way out of the building. her tone was light, but her eyes? not so much.

“actually— i’m meeting minjeong. study session.” and there it was. the shift. it was tiny, but you saw it. the slight pause in her step. the lightest twitch in her jaw. it was jealousy.

“oh.” she said, smiling like it didn’t bother her.

“she’s helping me pass, not planning my wedding.” you said half teasing, but karina wasn’t laughing. she was looking at you like you just slipped through her fingers.

“you can come by after. i’ll wait.” she said, reapplying lipgloss. you were about to respond when aeri popped up out of literally nowhere. “wait for what?”

you raised a brow. “karina invited me over.”

“okay? say yes.”

“i have a study session.” you said.

“she’ll still be minjeong tomorrow. but karina’s house has an elevator. have you seen it?”

“she’s not wrong.” karina muttered, arms crossed now.

“i saw i—“

“besides! karina can help you study. she has snacks too. gourmet ones. the fridge talks.” you turned back to karina, whose expression was neutral but her eyes had darkened just enough to make your stomach do a flip.

“fine. but i’m not staying late.” you said.

karina smiled. just barely. “you say that every time.”

“this would only be the second time.”

“and yet it’s starting to feel like a habit.” she said, already turning towards the parking lot. hou rolled your eyes but your heart was already racing.

yeah. you were in too deep. and you kinda liked it.

karina’s car was already purring in the lot, sleek and black. you had barely opened the passenger side door when a shriek came from behind you. “shotgun, bitch!” aeri shoved past you like this was mario kart and not a luxury vehicle. “are you serious?”

“deadass. my knees hurt.” she said, already buckled in and adjusting the seat. ning raised an eyebrow. “karina isn’t gonna let—“

“let her sit up here.” karina’s voice cut through.

“ugh, she really does get everything!” you slid into the passenger and aeri looked personally victimized by karina’s favoritism. “she’s not even trying and she still wins. i hope your spotify crashes mid song.” aeri muttered, dramatically slinging her legs over ning’s lap.

karina didn’t respond. she was busy driving like she had people to run over. but her hand was flexing on the wheel every time you leaned a little too close to the window. or when your phone buzzed and she saw minjeong’s name flash across the screen. you saw it too. she didn’t say anything, but her jaw did that thing again. and just as you passed the back exit, you spotted her. minjeong. she was talking to someone, her eyes locking with yours through the window just long enough to make your stomach twist.

“oh shit. that was minjeong, right?” aeri said under her breath. “she’s chill.” you muttered. but ning leaned forward between the seats with a smirk. “she looked mad chill. like she was upset or something kinda chill.” karina didn’t look back. just gripped the wheel a little tighter and hit the turn signal. the ride started off normal. well, as normal as it could be with ning trying to pick a playlist.

“i’m playing doja.” she declared, phone already connected.

“if y’all make me listen to doja one more time—”

“respectfully, shut up. it’s woman hour.”

“i am a woman!” aeri yelled back.

“not like doja is.”

“karina! can we get cold stone?” aeri chirped. karina was just silent. her hand on the wheel and her eyes were forward, but you saw the faintest twitch in her lips. amused. or maybe something more dangerous.

“karina! cold stone? please?” aeri repeated, dragging out the please. karina still didn’t answer right away. she just changed lanes.

“wait— what about min—” you started, already pulling your phone out.

“i want cold stone too. and i’m not about to third wheel y’all studying about cells and shit.” ning cut in. “we wouldn’t even be stu—” you paused, caught yourself, and then gave karina a look. “we’re not even gonna study, are we?”

karina finally glanced at you, eyes sharp and unreadable. “i don’t know. depends if you’re a good girl.” aeri made a noise that might’ve been a gag. “oh my god. please send her to jail.”

ning cackled. “nooo, let her have her moment. let them be weird.”

karina’s hand slid from the wheel to the center console, fingers brushing yours like it was casual. it wasn’t. “so? cold stone?” she asked quietly. you exhaled, letting your phone drop into your lap. “fine. but nothing crazy.”

“that’s what victiorian children say before they try my order and see god.”

“you put gummy bears and marshmallows in it.”

“it’s texture.”

ning rolled her eyes. “it’s giving diabetes.” karina didn’t say a word, but when the turn signal clicked again, you realized she had already taken the exit.

and yeah. maybe minjeong would be pissed. but as you watched karina change lanes like she owned the road and felt her fingers barely grazing yours again, you couldn’t find it in yourself to care. the cold stone parking lot was mostly empty, late afternoon sun casting long shadows over the building. karina pulled into a spot and looked over at you.

“stay close.” she said.

aeri was already halfway out the car, yelling something about birthday cake remix and how “cookie dough is a lifestyle.” ning followed behind her. you stepped out and felt karina’s hand brush yours again, then linger for just a second too long. you glanced up at her. “you always like this about ice cream?”

“only when you’re involved.” she said, walking ahead like she didn’t just throw you off guard. you caught up fast. inside, the cold stone was blaring early 2010s pop. aeri was already at the glass, pressed up against it like a child, pointing aggressively at mix ins.

“that. and that. and— yes, extra sprinkles.”

ning was pulling out her phone to take a picture of her nails in front of the rainbow display. you looked over at karina. she wasn’t looking at the ice cream. she was watching you.

“what?” you asked.

“what do you want?”

“me?”

“mmhm.”

“uh… coffee ice cream. brownies. fudge. maybe caramel…”

“why are you looking at me like that?” you laughed nervously.

“just figuring you out. you give strawberry energy but you order differently.” she said, lips twitching into a smirk.

“is that a bad thing?”

“not at all.” you were about to say something back when aeri waved you over, two samples already melting in her hand.

“taste test. now.” karina just stepped back, letting you take your time. and when you finally got your cup — caramel dripping down the side and way too many brownies packed in — she paid without asking. you opened your mouth to protest but she just raised a brow.

“habit.” she said simply. you didn’t argue. not this time. maybe you were getting pulled deeper into something you didn’t fully understand yet. but you were warm, full of sugar, and karina was walking next to you like she’d always been there. and for now? you let it happen.

you stepped outside into the gold drenched dusk, caramel already threatening to drip down your wrist. aeri and ning were arguing about who would win in a cage match between taylor swift and doja cat, both talking at the same time. karina walked beside you in silence, but it wasn’t awkward. it was heavy. intentional.

you stole a glance at her as you walked. perfect posture. gaze straight ahead. one hand tucked in her jacket pocket.

and that’s when it hit you. this was the plan.

the detour. the ice cream. the quiet touches. the eye contact. even letting aeri and ning come along, keeping it casual. giving you space, but not too much. you were never going to study with minjeong today.

you paused mid step, and karina noticed. of course she did. “something wrong?”

you looked up at her, heart racing just a little. “you knew what you were doing.”

karina blinked, slow and deliberate. “elaborate.”

“you changed the subject. distracted me. gave me sugar so i wouldn’t be mad.”

she tilted her head. “did it work?” you stared at her, at the way her smile ghosted across her lips like she already knew your answer. and maybe she did.

“you’re insane.” you muttered.

“so i’ve heard.” you didn’t pull away when she brushed her fingers against yours again. because deep down? you already knew this was the plan from the moment she said 'walk with me.'

karina’s place was quiet when you walked in. the kind of quiet that felt designed. she casually kicked her shoes off by the door and you followed suit, already feeling the marble under your socks like it was judging you. aeri flopped onto the couch like she paid rent there. “okay so. what’s the plan.”

“we literally just got here.” you said, setting your cold stone cup on the table.

“yeah and i’m already bored. can we do something? like a movie? or a game? strip uno?” ning looked up from scrolling. “girl. we are not doing strip anything with y/n and rina.”

aeri rolled her eyes so hard you thought they might get stuck. “oh my god, i meant it casually. like not full nipple. just a vibe.”

“we’re not playing strip uno, we need a better plan.”

you settled into the arm of the couch, spoon halfway to your mouth. “what happened to watching a movie?”

“that’s what people do when they’re boring.” ning said, crossing one leg over the other. “we should do something new. like— break into the community pool?” karina, who had been quiet this whole time, finally spoke. “we’re not breaking the law.”

“ugh, fine. then…” ning sat up straighter, eyes flicking between the three of you.

“let’s throw a party.”

“what?” you asked, spoon now frozen mid air.

“friday night. here. exclusive.” she said it like she was offering you a gift. karina didn’t even blink. “ning.”

“what? come on. you haven’t hosted anything since halloween and that doesn’t even count. i blacked out.”

aeri looked interested now. “i’m down. i’ll make a playlist. we can do a dress code. like hot but scary?”

“okay but—” you glanced at karina.

“you’re just gonna say yes to this?” karina tilted her head like she was studying you. “you don’t want to?”

you opened your mouth, paused. “i mean. i didn’t say that.” ning grinned. “so that’s a yes. party on friday. hosted by our very own karina yu.” karina just leaned back into the couch, spooning a piece of your brownie into her mouth like this was exactly how she wanted it to go.

aeri clapped. “yesss. i’m texting people. hot but scary, byob!” you watched as karina used your spoon again, completely unbothered by personal space. “you’re just gonna eat mine?”

“you said you didn’t want anything crazy.” she said, chewing. “this is crazy.”

“you’re insane.”

“you like that.” karina smiled with her whole face this time. you muttered something under your breath that definitely wasn’t denial and ignored how aeri and ning exchanged a look behind you. and when your phone buzzed again, another unread message from minjeong, you turned it over without checking. because suddenly, friday didn’t feel that far away. karina fed you some of your ice cream and you were starting to realize everything always went exactly how she wanted.

friday morning, the school hallways were buzzing in that weird, overstimulating way they always were after a party was announced. and a scandal. and even though you hadn’t caused the latest scandal (yet), walking in next to karina still made you feel like a headliner. she was close. closer than usual. one hand brushing the small of your back like a warning and a claim all at once.

“you slept okay?” she asked like it wasn’t 8:06 a.m. and you weren’t actively trying to survive.

“barely. someone kept texting me party theme ideas at 2 a.m.” you muttered, adjusting your bag.

“aeri’s passionate.”

“aeri’s insane.”

“and you’re invited to be insane with us.” she said, glancing sideways at you. you were just about to respond when you saw her — minjeong. heading down the hall. she stopped a few feet away, eyes flicking between you and karina. “morning.”

you hesitated. “hey.”

karina was the one who stepped forward, expression unreadable but voice light. “you coming tonight?” minjeong looked confused. “to what?”

“party at my place. ning’s idea. hot but scary. you’d fit.” karina said, tone smooth. you glanced between them and minjeong raised an eyebrow. “you’re inviting me?”

karina smiled. it was tight lipped and dangerous. “sure. we’re all friends now, right?” minjeong didn’t respond right away. “...i’ll think about it.” and just like that, she walked off.

you turned to karina. “was that necessary?”

“completely.” she said, already walking again. and of course you followed.

first period felt slower than usual. maybe because you were hyper aware of the way karina sat next to you, ankle lightly brushing against yours under the table. your mind wasn’t on the teacher. it was on her. and the fact that today... maybe you were going to initiate the plan. so when karina leaned over, voice low against your ear, "you zoning out?" you didn’t flinch. instead, you turned your head just enough that your nose almost brushed hers and smiled sweetly.

"you’re watching me again."

“i am.” she said simply, looking back at the board. you glanced down at your notebook. “you’re not very subtle.”

karina didn’t look at you, but her pen stilled. “you think so?”

“i know so.” she hummed. you flipped to a new page in your notebook, letting your pen hover.

“you look very pretty today.” now she looked at you. briefly.

"mhm?”

“yeah. i really like your hair.” karina didn’t respond. she just glanced down at your hand resting near hers and went back to writing like she didn’t hear you. but you saw it. the slight curve in her mouth, the slow drag of her pen. it was amusement. maybe interest.

“thanks.” she purred, eyes flickering down to your lips. you didn’t push. and for the rest of class, she didn’t say a word. but she didn’t move away either. when the bell rang, she stood first. cool and unbothered. “let’s go.”

by the time lunch rolled around, you found yourself walking beside minjeong again, the two of you weaving through the courtyard like nothing was weird. like she didn’t disappear right after karina’s invitation.

“so. you gonna come friday?” you said, nudging her lightly. minjeong just looked ahead. “you want me to?”

you shrugged. “i wouldn’t hate it.” she let out a quiet breath. not quite a laugh. “that’s the most lukewarm invitation i’ve ever gotten.” you smiled but didn’t say anything. there was a pause. you were about to speak when—

“y/n.” her voice. smooth. always at the wrong time. you turned to see karina already approaching, like she didn’t just interrupted something. no, like she didn’t care if she did.

“hey.” you said, slower this time. karina’s gaze flicked to minjeong for a second, unreadable. “can i steal you?”

minjeong crossed her arms, subtle but still not that subtle. you glanced between them, heartbeat a little too loud in your ears. karina tilted her head, a small smile playing at her lips. “i brought you something.”

“what?” karina held up a small brown bag. “double chocolate muffin. the good kind. from the café off main.”

you stared at the bag, then at her. “you left campus?”

“i was early.” minjeong let out a low scoff just under her breath. not enough to cause a scene, but enough to register. karina didn’t react. just held the bag out to you again. “you coming?” you hesitated, but only for a second before taking it.

“thanks.” you said, voice quiet. karina nodded once. then you looked back at minjeong. she didn’t say anything. didn’t stop you. she just watched you walk away. and as you followed karina across the quad, hand curled around the still warm muffin, you tried not to think too hard about the fact that she always, somehow, pulled you back to her.

you ended up at the usual spot, half tucked under karina’s arm on the bench while aeri and ning fought over something across from you. karina wasn’t saying much. just slowly picking the chocolate chips out of the muffin she bought you like it was hers now. you didn’t call her out for it.

“okay, okay. tonight.” aeri said suddenly, slapping her hands down on the table. “tonight.” ning echoed, mouth full.

“i’m thinking. we start hot but scary… and end with hot and scandalous.” aeri continued, lowering her voice like she was about to reveal a fbi level secret. ning laughed. “girl. you just wanna make out with someone.”

“no shame in that.” ning shrugged. then looked right at you with a glint in her eye.

“you’re bringing a costume, right y/n?” karina’s hand stilled against the muffin and you just stared. “costume?”

“duh. you can’t just show up ‘normal.’ it’s gotta be scary or hot. preferably both.” ning grinned. karina finally spoke. “she’ll figure it out.”

but ning wasn’t done. “i’m just saying. people are gonna go crazy tonight. last year, someone hooked up in the upstairs bathroom.”

aeri fake gagged. “in the pink guest room?”

“yup.” you raised an eyebrow. “wait. upstairs?”

ning nodded. “you’re allowed up there... if you’re invited.” karina’s fingers tapped the table once. sharp. deliberate.

“ning.”

ning smiled wider, like she loved being warned. karina turned to you, voice softer now. “you don’t have to worry about that.”

you looked at her, curious. “why not?”

karina tilted her head slightly, a slow smile curling at the edges of her mouth. “because you’ll already be where you’re supposed to be. with me.”

ning let out a groan. “god. you two are insufferable.”

“you’re just mad you’re single.” aeri laughed.

“single by choice!” ning shouted. you just shook your head, laughing under your breath. but when you glanced back at karina, she was already watching you. and she didn’t look like she was joking. not even a little bit.

the rest of the day dragged the way it always did when something bigger was happening. you barely processed half your classes and aeri yelling something about "outfits" across the parking lot. because you were thinking about tonight.

by the time the final bell rang, you needed air. you found minjeong near the side entrance. she looked up when you approached, face shifting through about five different emotions before she settled on neutral.

"hey.” you said.

"hey.” she echoed. for a second, neither of you moved. then you both started walking at the same time, falling into step without needing to talk about it. it was easy with minjeong. easier than it should’ve been, considering everything.

"you should come.” you said, breaking the silence. it felt refreshing to finally have a conversation with her today. but your voice was too gentle. you heard it and you hated it. minjeong looked at you like you were impossible. like you didn’t get it.

"you’re not gonna be able to fix it. not with me there.” she said.

you shoved your hands into your pockets. "maybe not. but i don’t want you alone, either."

minjeong just shook her head, stepping back onto the path. "i’ll think about it." it wasn’t a yes. but it wasn’t a no, either. you stood there for a second after she left, staring at the spot where she’d been, feeling heavier than you should. and when you finally turned, when you finally made your way to the front of the school—

karina was waiting. leaning against her car with her arms crossed and eyes hidden behind dark sunglasses. you almost laughed. almost. until she pushed off the car and walked over.

"busy?" she asked, voice casual. too casual.

"talking to minjeong."

karina tilted her head like she was pretending to think about that. "hmm." you raised an eyebrow. "what?"

"nothing. you’re loyal. it’s cute.” she said, stepping closer and lowering her sunglasses enough that you could see the glint in her eyes. you flushed, hating how easily she could still make you react. the plan wasn’t going very well yet.

karina smiled then reached out, tugging your backpack strap like a leash, pulling you one step closer. "don’t worry. you won’t be thinking about her tonight.” she said, voice low, only for you. and then she let go, walking around you to the driver’s side like she didn’t just set something on fire between you. you stood there for half a second. then you followed. because somehow, even knowing everything you knew, you were still walking straight into her arms. and maybe you wanted to.

the drive was quiet at first. but not the awkward kind. karina lazily kept one hand on the wheel, glancing at you every so often like she was thinking things she wasn’t saying. you stared out the window, pretending not to feel it. halfway to your house, she finally spoke.

"what are you wearing tonight?"

“what?"

"for the party. you can’t just show up in a hoodie.” she tapped the wheel once, nails clicking.

"thanks for the vote of confidence.” you muttered, crossing your arms. karina just smiled, unbothered.

"i’m serious. it’s a theme."

"i’ll figure something out." karina didn’t respond right away. she just kept driving.

"i sent something to your house."

you turned your head, eyebrows lifting. "what?"

"you’ll see." you stared at her but she just smoothly pulled up in front of your place, putting the car in park.

"i’ll see you tonight." she said simply, fingers drumming once against the wheel. you hesitated, halfway out the door.

"karina—"

"tonight." her voice cut you off. soft but firm. "wear it." you didn’t say anything else. you just shut the door and stood there, watching her drive away. and sitting there on the doorstep like a warning was a black box, tied with a silver ribbon. your name in her handwriting. you untied it with shaky fingers, peeled back the tissue paper and stared.

lace. straps. the outfit wasn’t just hot and scary. it was a problem. and you were going to wear it.

──────────౨ৎ───────────

you didn’t text her you were coming. didn’t say a word in the group chat. just got ready slowly like you weren’t already an hour late.

you wore the outfit karina sent. every strap, every inch of lace. but you added your own twist. a little jacket she didn’t pick. cat ears. eyeliner whiskers. and a thin black ribbon around your neck like a collar. you needed a costume and that was the point.

the uber dropped you off just past 10:30. the bass from the house hit before the front steps did. lights flashing behind the windows. laughter spilling out onto the lawn. someone was already throwing up in a bush. you didn’t go to the door right away. you took your time. karina had made you wait before and you were returning the favor. by the time you walked in, the party was deep. and the moment you stepped through the door, people turned.

you were late. and you were seen. someone gasped — maybe ning — and somewhere across the room, aeri shouted “OH my god.” but karina was near the stairs. leaning against the wall like she hasn’t been checking the door all night. glass in one hand, with an unreadable expression. but her grip on the railing tightened the second she saw you.

you felt it, but you didn’t go to her. not yet.

you let her watch you walk through the crowd. let her see someone stop you to talk. and when you finally made it close enough, just barely within arm’s reach, she stepped forward — quiet but intense.

“you’re late.”

“am i?”

her eyes dragged down your body like she paid for it. and, technically, she did.

“you wore it.”

“you sent it.” there was silence before karina spoke again. “take off the jacket.”

you raised an eyebrow. “you don’t wanna say hi first?”

“hi. now take it off.” you held her gaze. then slowly tugged at the jacket on your shoulders.

"holy shit." aeri said before you could even take your jacket off. ning was behind her, eyes wide with her drink in hand. karina disappeared in an instant. “okay, you were holding out on us.”

you shrugged like you didn’t know exactly what you were doing. “was i?” aeri circled around you like you were on display, grabbing the edge of your jacket sleeve. “karina’s gonna lose her mind.”

"you say that like she hasn't already.” you muttered, eyes flicking toward the stairs where karina had just gotten pulled into a conversation by someone too rich and too loud to ignore. her eyes stayed on you as long as they could. but eventually, she had to look away. ning noticed it too. “...you planning something?”

you turned, expression calm but playful. “depends. you two wanna help?” aeri smiled immediately and ning leaned in. “always.”

you glanced over your shoulder, making sure karina was still busy. she was. but not for long. “okay. so. karina. she always watches. but she never really moves. she stays two steps ahead. like it’s a game she already won.” you murmured, turning back to them.

“because it is. and she always wins.” ning said.

“not tonight. tonight she’s gonna chase. i don’t want any of that. just... her.” you said. aeri raised an eyebrow. “you sure you can handle that?”

“not the point. i want her to feel something. enough to drop the act.”

“I’m in. what’s the plan?” you leaned in. “simple. we make her jealous. curious. we make her wonder. and when she’s finally about to snap? that’s when i pull her upstairs.”

“and then?”

“then we see who she really is.” you were three sips into your drink when aeri leaned closer, fake casual.

“you know she didn’t used to be like this.” she said like she was commenting on the music. “like what?” you asked, already knowing the answer.

ning leaned her elbows on the counter next to you, swirling the drink in her cup. “like… karina.”

“possessive. obsessive. scary hot but scary scary.” aeri added.

“she was always hot. but she used to be fun.” ning said.

“she’s not fun now?”

ning gave you a look. “i mean… she’s fun.”

“but not in a ‘would lose a game of truth or dare without threatening someone’ way. she used to let people win.” aeri sighed. you raised an eyebrow. “so what changed?”

they exchanged a glance. you caught it. “what?” you asked.

“nothing. just… you kinda right. she used to be different.” she waved a hand. “before freshman year?” ning’s eyes narrowed like you were too clever for your own good before shrugging.

“it’s just… she wasn’t always like this. before freshman year, she was—” she paused. “different.”

aeri shot her a look. “ning.”

“i’m not saying anything bad!” ning insisted. then looked back at you. “just… there was someone before. yujin. and i think she lost her because she didn’t show how much she really wanted her until it was too late.” you frowned. “what happened?”

“ask her. but maybe don’t bring up yujin’s name unless you want a whole thing.” ning said, suddenly breezy again. you took another shot and spun in a slow circle. “well now i need to know everything.”

“you’ll get your moment. because she hasn’t taken her eyes off you since you walked in. even now. especially now.” ning said, nodding towards karina. you looked at her.

“she hasn’t even moved. i thought she would come over by now.” you said, sipping whatever mystery drink aeri handed you.

“oh, she’s watching. she’s doing that thing where she pretends not to care.” aeri muttered, eyes flicking past your shoulder. “which is funny considering the way she acts like she owns you in public.” ning added.

you raised an eyebrow. “does she?”

“babe. she bought your outfit, picked your earrings and threatened that one guy that looked at you. she’s claiming you.” aeri said, smiling. “well, she’s gonna have to prove it.”

you weren’t sure if it was the alcohol or the music or the adrenaline from knowing karina could walk up at any second, but your skin buzzed. and you didn’t have to wait long. you turned your head — and there she was. karina. still in that dark wine colored dress that clung in all the right places, dipped low in the back and slit high on the side. her hair was pulled back, earrings catching the light. it was the kind of look that made everyone in the room aware of her without her saying a word.

she stepped in close. close enough to make your heart pick up but not enough to make it obvious. her eyes moved slowly. the cat ears, the black ribbon tied like a collar, the slick fabric of your dress that she bought, shortened and sharpened into a sexy little costume. she smiled. slow and warm. but not soft.

"where was i?" karina’s eyes flicked to your neck, then back to your mouth. “you’re a problem.”

“you like it.”

“i do. maybe too much.” she didn’t hesitate. a moment passed, heavy in the air. then her voice dropped softer, only for you.

“i can’t decide what i like more. that you wore something i picked or that you made it look like this.” she murmured, eyes dragging over you again. your skin buzzed and aeri cleared her throat.

“okay. we’re gonna go… anywhere else.” she said loudly, grabbing ning’s wrist. they disappeared into the crowd again, half laughing. karina didn’t look away.

“come find me later?” she said, like it was both a question and a guarantee. you raised your brows, voice light while you pouted. “you’re leaving me? what if i don’t wanna?”

her jaw tensed just enough. but then she smiled again, tight lipped. “don’t make me come looking for you.”

and with that, she turned and walked back towards the hallway, already being pulled into conversation by someone else. but you felt it. her eyes? they never really left.

you settled at the kitchen counter once more, nursing a cup in your hand while you allowed your head to shake to the beat.

that was when a guy slowly approached you, oblivious to the pair of eyes burning onto your skin.

he was tall. broad. the kind of guy who wore chains he probably didn’t earn and smiled like he expected the world to swoon.

“hey. you new around here?” he said, already sliding into your space like he was invited.

you raised an eyebrow, sipping your drink. “do i look new?”

“no. but you look like something i want.”

you laughed once at his boldness.

his smile widened. “i’m yeonjun.”

of course he was. you knew him. everyone knew him.

you let him talk. let him compliment your costume, call you the hottest catgirl he’s ever seen, try and touch your hand while you adjusted your ribbon.

and across the room, karina was watching.

she wasn’t pretending anymore.

aeri and ning came in from the kitchen with drinks in hand, glitter everywhere, and both of them already yelling.

“hello?? did you get a fan club?” aeri shrieked.

“oh my god. is that yeonjun?” ning said, mouth open.

“it is.” you muttered, barely glancing at him.

“he’s so hot but so dumb. literally everyone wanted to fuck him last year.” aeri whispered.

yeonjun, entirely oblivious, smiled at you. “they your friends?”

“sort of.” aeri smiled, looping her arm through yours.

yeonjun tried to say something else but was immediately ignored.

“okay, now turn your head three inches to the left. karina is locked in.” ning said, sipping her drink dramatically. you didn’t even have to look. you could feel it.

“she hasn’t blinked in like a full minute. she’s either gonna die or commit a crime.” aeri said.

“so same as usual.” ning shrugged.

you turned back to yeonjun. “so, what are you supposed to be?”

“uh, myself. ‘cause you know…” he said, flexing slightly.

“god. he’s so lucky he’s pretty.” aeri whispered behind her drink.

you smirked and leaned a little closer to him, letting your hand rest on your own hip. not his. not yet.

you were about to respond until you saw minjeong in the corner of your eye.

leaning against the archway like she was standing there for a while. cup in hand and gaze fixed on you.

your smile dropped.

yeonjun was still talking but you couldn’t hear him. you murmured something to him, an excuse maybe, and slipped away before he could stop you.

the noise of the party dulled the closer you got to her.

“hey.” you greeted.

“hey yourself. so this is what happens when karina plays dress up.” she said, eyes scanning your outfit.

you smiled faintly. “don’t start.”

“not starting anything. just making an observation.” she said in an amused tone.

you both stood there for a second, the party pulsing behind you. then she nudged your cup with hers.

“so. how’s the plan going?” minjeong said a little quieter. your throat tightened slightly.

“still intact.”

“good. keep it that way.” she nodded once.

you stared at her. “you sound like you think i’m gonna slip up.”

minjeong shrugged. “no. i know how she works.”

your silence said more than it should’ve.

minjeong offered a small smile. “i’m not here to scare you. stop doing that.”

“what did i do?”

“you keep going silent on me.”

“what am i supposed to say?”

“i don’t know. what are you thinking?” minjeong shrugged.

“i want her but i want the truth.”

“i think you can get it. just be careful. i like you and i’d rather not watch her snap you in half just because you forgot she’s not playing fair.”

her eyes softened.

“just don’t lose yourself in her. not all at once.”

before you could reply, she was already walking away to the sound of someone calling her name.

you stood there for a moment, letting minjeong’s words settle.

then—

“HELLO? y/n??”

aeri appeared in front of you out of nowhere, cheeks flushed and glitter in her lashes. one hand on her hip and the other was holding a drink.

“we lost you to hot boy #3. and then we lost you again to the corner.” ning added.

you blinked, a little dazed. “just… catching up.”

aeri raised an eyebrow. “with minjeong?”

“she gave me a pep talk.” you said, vague on purpose.

ning grinned. “that sounds fake but okay.”

“is she still in love with karina?” aeri asked bluntly, sipping her drink.

“no? i don’t know!”

they exchanged a look. one of those unspoken ones.

aeri leaned in. “whatever. we need more shots.”

“absolutely. and dancing.” ning added, grabbing your hand.

you hesitated. “i don’t know if—”

“don’t care. you’re wearing lingerie and fake ears, you gotta give into the sluttiness.” aeri said sweetly.

“and. you know she’s watching. has been. not even blinking.” ning sang, already pulling you into the living room.

your stomach flipped. but you didn’t stop them.

the music hit harder as you stepped into the crowd again and ning handed you something you thought was vodka. you downed it with the kind of attitude that came from being halfway in control and halfway over it.

you were laughing, dancing, spinning under lights you didn’t recognize when yeonjun reappeared, hand brushing your waist like he belonged there.

“miss me?” he asked.

you didn’t answer yet.

but you didn’t stop him either. one hand brushed your hip like he had a right to.

“i thought you gave up easy.” you said.

he smiled. “i don’t give up when i want something.”

you rolled your eyes but didn’t move away. the liquor hit harder in your veins and your body swayed, loose and untethered. you let your arms drape around his shoulders. not because he deserved it. but because you knew she was watching.

somewhere in this house. somewhere behind you.

you didn’t need to see her to know. you could feel it. it was like a thread winding tight around your ribs. pulling you in.

yeonjun leaned closer, bold now, mouth near your ear. “you’re gorgeous.”

you laughed. and just before he could speak again, something shifted.

you turned your head slightly, enough to catch her.

karina. at the edge of the room.

she wasn’t leaning. she was moving. her eyes were locked on you and didn’t stray. not once.

you smile twitched.

yeonjun noticed none of it. “come upstairs with me?” he asked.

you looked back at him. “you think I’m that easy?”

“what?”

you stepped back just out of his reach. “sorry. not interested.”

he frowned. “you were just—”

but you were already turning. already walking away. and behind you through the crowd, karina was following. you didn’t rush or run. you wanted her to catch you.

each room you passed, you felt her closer. then a hand caught your wrist.

you stopped, turned, and she was there.

“don’t do that again.” her voice was low and calm.

“what, dance?”

“flirt with him.”

you tilted your head, feigning innocence. “you weren’t there.”

“i’m always there.” karina stood there, eyes locked on yours. too still. too composed.

you tilted your head, gaze tracing her silhouette. “you gonna keep staring, or were you gonna say something?”

“didn’t want to ruin the show.”

you sipped your drink, letting the music pulse between you. “but you like watching, don’t you?”

karina stepped closer. “only when it’s you.”

a breath caught in your chest but you didn’t let it show. you just rolled your eyes.

“you should be careful.” karina finally murmured, voice almost gentle.

you smiled. “everybody says that.”

“you didn’t listen to them.”

“because i want you, jimin.” you sighed, exasperated.

you could hear her suck in a breath.

“then let me have you.”

you didn’t let the shiver show. but it was there. “not until you learn how to be honest.”

karina’s expression cracked just for a second. before she could speak, a voice called your name.

you stepped back without looking away.

“come find me later. when you’re ready to stop treating me like something you can keep in your pocket, jimin.”

and then you were gone, slipping back into the crowd.

but karina? she was still standing there. like she just lost something she thought she already owned.

“where have you been?” ning asked, stepping in front of you as soon as you entered the kitchen. you didn’t answer right away. just took the bottle from aeri’s hand and drank straight from it.

“y/n. what happened?” aeri tilted her head, brows furrowed.

“karina happened.” you muttered, tossing the liquor back. the burn was dull and familiar.

“did yall fuck that quick?” ning widened her eyes.

you choked slightly on the drink. “what—no!”

“then why do you look like you just got slammed against a wall?” aeri said, tilting her head.

“she followed me.”

“duh.” ning muttered.

“what did she say?” aeri asked, stepping closer. you could smell the alcohol on her lips.

“told me not to flirt with yeonjun.”

aeri stared. “that’s it?“

“she said she’s always there.” you muttered, grabbing the bottle again and drinking straight from it.

“the obsession spiral. she’s so back.” ning sighed, fixing your hair.

you drank again. “i told her no.”

both of them stared.

“i told her she can’t have me unless she learns how to be honest.”

“she might lose it.” aeri said.

“she said ‘let me have you.’ you exhaled, remembering the words.

ning actually put a hand on her chest. “i love when she getd dramatic like that.”

“that ain’t drama, that’s delusion. and the way you walked back in here?” aeri corrected.

“she just looked at me.” you said quietly.

“karina doesn’t… deal with rejection. not from people she wants.”

“and she wants you.” ning said, no teasing this time. but you all knew that.

you stared down into the bottle. “so what do i do?”

aeri shrugged. “the plan still on, isn’t it?”

you looked up at her before shrugging.

“then you need to dance. right now. before she finds you again.” ning said.

you tilted your head back and downed another one. “okay.”

ning grinned while dragging you to the living room. the music thumped louder and you wiped your mouth with the back of your hand.

the moment you began to dance aeri shoved a drink in your hand. ning grabbed the other. you were being moved like a doll, but you didn’t care. it was no different than being with karina.

“she’s watching.” aeri whispered in your ear.

you didn’t have to ask who.

“good.” you muttered, sipping the drink.

“that’s the spirit.” ning spun you into the center of the crowd like it was a runway.

you danced. it wasn’t graceful. it was sloppy, confident, and all hips. you were letting the liquor take over. aeri pressed behind you, light hands on your hips. phones were out and

for a second, you forgot about karina. you forgot about the way she said “let me have you” like it was a prayer.

ning cackled, slipping another shot into your hand.

“i think i’m already drunk.” you said. but you threw it back anyway.

you turned your head and there she was. she was across the room with her back to the wall, arms crossed, eyes locked on you. cold and possessive.

you smiled at her.

“she looks like she’s gonna murder me.” you muttered.

“she wouldn’t. you’re her favorite toy.” ning shrugged.

another shot. you lost count.

someone grabbed your hand. you danced harder.

karina was still watching you like she wanted to kill you. or kiss you. or maybe both.

you blinked up at ning. “i think i’m gonna throw up.”

“nah. you’ll be fine.” ning said.

“she’s coming.” aeri whispered.

you didn’t look.

“what do i do?”

“let her suffer. that’s the plan, right?” ning said. it wasn’t.

but you laughed anyway. loud and drunk.

karina took one step forward. you took two back into aeri’s arms before continuing to dance.

and when you felt a firm grip on your wrist, you knew it was karina. it wasn’t painful, but it was enough to remind you that she wasn’t asking.

you didn’t fight her. you were too dizzy. too tired. too done.

she pulled you through the house like a thread, past rooms full of people, eyes flicking towards you with quiet curiosity. a drunk girl was being dragged off by her maybe girlfriend. or maybe not.

the moment the door shut behind you, karina finally let go.

“you’re drunk.”

you laughed. “really?”

karina didn’t laugh back. she stepped forward, arms crossed and jaw tense. her expression was unreadable.

“you shouldn’t be drinking like that.”

“you shouldn’t be controlling.”

her lip twitched. “i’m not trying to control you.”

“bullshit.”

“y/n—”

“don’t ‘y/n’ me. can you just be honest? just for once? if you were honest and did this the right way, then we wouldn’t even be here.” you snapped, stepping back.

karina stood across from you, chest rising and falling. the room was too quiet, and the bass from the party outside thudded faintly through the walls.

“you’re drunk. you’re not thinking straight.” she said again, quieter this time.

“stop using that as an excuse. i’m drunk, not stupid.” you dragged your hands down your face. “god, you’re so hot it actually pisses me off.”

karina stared. “what?”

“you— you walk around acting like you don’t actually care and everyone’s telling me not to fall for it but then say shit like ‘let me have you’ and stalk me around parties and get all possessive. like— i don’t know what’s real.”

“it’s all real. everything i’ve said. everything i’ve done.” she said, stepping closer. her voice dropped, softer now.

you laughed bitterly. “even the controlling part?”

“i’m not controlling—”

“you are. you want me close but only on your terms. you get jealous, you get weird when i talk to other people, you talk like i belong to you, karina.”

she didn’t deny it. she just stared at you, expression unreadable.

“i just want honesty. even if it sucks. even if it hurts. stop trying to play me.” you said, voice softer now.

“i’m not playing you. but you want honesty?” she paused. “then let’s be honest.”

you watched her warily.

“my mom told me. about the transfer.” she said.

your stomach turned.

“she said your dad’s affair got out. that your mom wants a fresh start. how quick they pulled you out.”

the silence that followed was suffocating.

your throat burned. “you had no right—”

“she’s the counselor, y/n.”

“yeah? and you had no right to use that against me. i don't have to tell you everything.” you backed up, bumping into the velvet chair behind you. “what, you’re just gonna throw my worst moment at me when you’re losing control?”

“i’m not trying to win or lose—”

“yes you are!” you raised your voice. “you always are. this is a game to you. a way to get people to obey you.”

karina’s jaw clenched. “no. you’re different.”

“then treat me like i’m different! you keep saying that but all i get is secrecy and obsession and manipulation. and— i think i like it. fuck, i think i like you so much it’s fucking me up, but i can’t keep doing this if you won’t give me anything real.”

the silence stretched long in between you. karina didn’t move.

“i could be good for you. if you let me.” she said, almost in a whisper.

you exhaled. “i don’t want the version of you you think i want. i want the real you. even if it’s ugly. even if you’re scared. i don’t want to be someone you collect and protect and keep quiet. i want to matter.”

“you do matter. that’s why i’m trying so hard.” karina said.

“then stop using what you know to control me. stop hovering. stop acting like knowing me means owning me.”

she scoffed. “i only know because i care.”

“and i’m telling you right now— you’re gonna lose me if you keep going like this.”

she didn’t respond.

“it’s been a month of being dragged, watched, and decoded like i’m just a new file in your brain. don’t you think i’m tired?”

and then quieter, you added. “i’m not yujin.”

karina froze.

your voice trembled. “i don’t care who she was. but i’m not her. you don’t get to rewrite what you lost with someone else through me.”

she stepped forward again, slower now. “i know.”

“do you?”

“i do. you’re not her. you’re you.” she said.

you shook your head. “then let me be me.”

“i keep trying to convince myself you’re just intense. that this is just your form of affection.” you said slowly, eyes on her. she stayed quiet.

“but sometimes i look at you and it’s like you already know how this ends. like you already planned ten steps ahead of me.”

her silence was confirmation.

“and that scares me.” you admitted quietly.

karina’s eyes flickered with shame, maybe. or guilt. or something colder underneath. the calculation that she always tried to hide behind softness.

“i didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“maybe not. but you did. you treat me like a replacement for whatever you lost.”

karina swallowed. “i never wanted that.”

“then why do i feel like i’m being studied?”

she took a step forward and you took one back.

“don’t. not this time.” you said.

her head tilted. “then would you rather i ignored you? like your parents did? like your friends did back home when everything fell apart?”

you froze.

that was a low blow. and she knew it.

she saw it in your face. and still, she didn’t take it back. she only stepped closer.

“i’m the only one who’s seen the whole you and stayed. doesn’t that mean something?”

you stared at her. “you’re not staying. you’re watching. waiting to see how i break so you can catch the pieces before anyone else.”

her lip twitched like she wanted to deny it. but she couldn’t.

“i didn’t ask for this. i didn’t ask for the secrets or the way you make me feel insane or the fact that i still want you even when i know i shouldn’t.”

she moved again. you didn’t.

“you still haven’t told me the truth about yujin. about what happened. why you can’t let go.”

“i didn’t want to scare you.”

“you already did.”

the words hung between you, heavier than anything else.

karina’s voice dropped. “you think i’m too much now. but you didn’t seem scared when you kissed me. or when you stayed the night. or when you begged me not to stop touching you.”

you flinched.

she stepped even closer, now inches from you. “you weren’t scared then. you liked it. you liked being known.”

“don’t twist this.” you whispered.

“i’m not. you’re the one running because i care in other ways people can’t.” she said.

“that’s not love, karina. that’s control.” you said, backing away.

“you call it control.”

you almost laughed. “karina. you’re on your own planet.”

but she didn’t answer. instead, she stepped forward. and then, without warning or hesitation, dropped to her knees.

you froze.

“karina.”

she looked up at you from the floor, eyes locked on yours like you were the only thing keeping her down to earth.

she didn’t look pathetic. she looked intentional. poised. like she thought about this before. she didn’t reach for you right away. just stared up, head tilted slightly like she was memorizing you from this angle. her eyes were clear. soft in a way that made your throat burn.

“you scare me.” she admitted, voice barely above a whisper. “the way you see me. the way you make me want to be different.”

you hated how that made you pause. how it made you ache.

“i know i come off cold. calculated. maybe i am. maybe that’s what happens when you already lost someone once and promised yourself you’d never feel that again. but you—” she looked up, slowly. “you make me feel like i don’t have to be that version of myself.”

you looked away, afraid of what was happening to your resolve.

“i don’t want to own you,” she said and her voice cracked just slightly. “i just want to keep you. to protect the only thing that’s made me feel real again.”

god. she was good.

you wanted to believe her. you almost did.

“karina…” your voice trembled. “i don’t know if you’re saying this because it’s true, or because you know i’ll stay if you do.”

her smile was sad and quiet. “maybe both.”

and somehow, that honesty hurt the most.

she reached up slowly. her fingers ghosted over your wrist like she was asking for permission without words. you didn’t pull away.

“don’t leave.” she said it so quietly that it cracked something in you.

you swallowed. her hands moved slowly, reaching for yours like they were something sacred. she waited, and when you didn’t stop her, she slid her fingers over your palm, lifting it gently. her lips pressed against the back of your hand, soft and slow, lingering like she didn’t want to let go.

and for a moment, you almost faltered. you almost fell again. that was how she worked, sweet enough to confuse you, but sharp enough to keep you in check.

but before you could respond —

knock knock.

the door creaked. “yo.” ning’s voice cut in. too casual. “am i interrupting… something?”

you stepped back instantly. like you had woken up.

karina didn’t even turn to look. “leave.”

“okay damn.” ning’s voice faded as the door shut again.

but the moment had cracked. fractured in the way that all glass eventually does.

“i have to go.” you said, your voice small.

karina stood slowly, no longer trying to stop you. but she didn’t look surprised. only calm again. composed. a little sad. which made it harder to leave. her silence was the cruelest part.

but you did anyway. and your hands were already shaking as you texted minjeong.

you woke up slow. heavy. like the night before had pressed its whole body against you and never really left.

there was sunlight pouring in through the curtains, soft and too gentle for how you felt. the sheets were warm and unfamiliar but they didn’t smell like her.

your throat was dry. your head was pounding. your chest? worse.

because it remembered everything.

you laid there for a long time in the quiet. wrapped in the comfort of someone else’s house and the ache of your own mistakes.

minjeong’s guest bed. in her extra blanket.

not karina’s arms. not karina’s bed. not karina.

you hated that that mattered.

the scent of lavender came from the pillow. there was a water glass beside the bed, half full, and two advil on a folded napkin.

your phone buzzed under your pillow. you ignored her.

your body still remembered her. the grip. the way she’d looked at you like you were the most infuriating thing she had ever wanted.

you rolled onto your back, staring up at the ceiling. your body ached in strange places—your temples, your chest, the hollow spot behind your ribs where her voice used to echo.

you didn’t know what time it was. you didn’t care. you just existed in the hangover and the heat of her memory.

then the buzz came again. 6 texts. 2 missed calls. 1 voice message.

none from her.

but you opened it anyway.

ning

ummmm she ended the party

literally pulled the aux mid song.

likeee everyone out

no yelling n no emotion

your chest tightened.

aeri

girl when i say SCARY…

haven’t seen her like that since the thing with yujin

she didn’t even say ur name but we all knew

the blood drained from your face.

aeri

she went upstairs after

didn’t even look at anyone

you stared at your phone. you knew she was upstairs probably replaying every word you said. probably memorizing the exact angle you looked at her when you told her she was controlling. probably blaming herself. probably blaming you more.

you imagined her sitting on her bed, scrolling through something that reminded her of you. or maybe nothing at all.

you could still hear it from last night:

“you weren’t scared then. you liked it. you liked being known.”

and fuck, maybe you did.

maybe that was the worst part. that she looked at you like she already knew how this ended. that she kissed you like she built the ending to your story herself.

“morning.” minjeong’s voice came soft from the doorway.

you turned your head but didn’t speak. she walked in, still in sweats while holding a mug of tea.

“i thought you might need something warm.”

you didn’t answer. just reached for it with a quiet nod.

she sat beside you, watching the way your hand curled around the mug.

“you look like you’ve seen a ghost.” she said.

you laughed under your breath. “i think i might’ve dated one.”

minjeong tilted her head. “you didn’t date her.”

“i know. she ended the party. didnt say anything. she’s probably not even mad.”

“she’s probably hurting. in her own twisted way.” minjeong said. you finished the tea, feeling your body start to thaw.

you finished the tea in a few gulps. “she always been like this?” you asked.

minjeong leaned back, stretching her legs out beside the bed. “kind of. not always in the scary way. back when we were freshmen, she was… a lot more normal. we were close.” you glanced at her, the word close sticking.

“you know she was captain of the volleyball team. people liked her, but it wasn’t… like now. she was just kind of cool and serious and good at stuff. intimidating, sure, but not on purpose. she laughed more.”

minjeong smiled faintly at the memory. “sophomore year, she bleached her hair and suddenly half the school had a crush on her. everyone started looking at her different. like she was untouchable. even the teachers. i think she liked it.”

you tilted your head. “what about you?”

minjeong shrugged. “i liked her before that. when she still let herself be soft. when it wasn’t all about control. i guess i just fell into it? she used to let me hang around after practice. we would talk. sometimes she would drive me home. it wasn’t anything, but at the time it felt like everything.” you nodded slowly.

“i think i mistook her attention for affection. but karina gives her attention very… strategically. and you start bending around it.”

“she hurt her shoulder junior year and stopped playing. she didn’t tell anyone at first. i found out, told jiwon, and i guess she figured out eventually.” minjeong continued.

“that’s why you guys stopped talking?” you asked, quietly.

“yeah. she doesn’t handle that very well.” she said, voice low. but you knew that.

“but hey. i got a text from jiwon.” minjeong changed the subject, making your ears perk up. “she said that her parents couldn’t afford the cost anymore.”

“just like that?”

“yeah. she’s already packed and ready to leave wednesday.” there was a pass of silence between you two.

“she got on her knees.”

minjeong looked at you. “what?”

you stared out at the grass. “last night. when i told her she was controlling.”

you took a slow breath, unsteady. “she just… dropped. right there. like it wasn’t a performance. like it was a decision. like she knew what she was doing and still wanted me to see her that way.” minjeong was quiet.

“she didn’t touch me, not at first.” you said. “just looked up at me like… i don’t know.” your voice cracked a little. “and then she reached for my hand.”

minjeong nodded for you to go on, eyes careful. “she kissed it. twice. once like she needed to remember me. and then again like she wanted me to forget everything else.”

“and the way she said things… like she wasn’t trying to win me over. just trying not to lose me. she told me i scare her.” you let out a breathy laugh, bitter. “me. like i’m the one with power.”

minjeong looked down, biting the inside of her cheek.

“she said i made her want to change.” you said softly. “but it felt like a test. like she wanted me to forgive her just because she knew how to sound honest.”

you stared down at your hands. they still felt like hers.

“then ning came in.” you added, voice distant. “door cracked open like a fucking movie scene. she saw us and dipped so fast.”

“and you left.” minjeong finished for you.

you nodded. “i told her i had to go. she didn’t even stop me.” your eyes stung.

“i still wanted to stay.” you admitted. “i think that’s the worst part.”

minjeong looked at you then, eyes soft but firm. “no it isn’t.”

“it makes me hers.”

“don’t go back. not yet." she said.

you leaned into her shoulder just slightly. and this time, when your phone buzzed, you didn’t look.

the second you stepped in the school building, you felt it.

that weird tension that came when something major happened and the walls were still pretending nothing changed.

students were moving around like normal, laughing, running to class, shoving lockers shut, but everything felt too loud. and then you saw her.

karina was leaning against the lockers, phone in hand. she was standing between ning and aeri like nothing had happened. like she didn’t look you in the eye three nights ago and say things you can’t unhear. like she didn’t ask you not to leave her, and then let you walk away anyway.

you didn’t even get a glance. not a twitch. not a blink in your direction. just her mouth curling at something that ning said. her arms crossing in that familiar way, eyes locked on anything but you. you slowed down.

“don’t.” minjeong said softly, already seeing the shift in your face.

you turned towards her like you haven’t been staring. “what?”

she looked at you for a second too long. then she opened the front door, holding it long enough for you to pass through. the main hallway hit you with a mix of perfume and the citrus floor cleaner the janitors used.

you barely noticed. you were still focused on karina. “she’s pretending like i don’t exist. did you see that?” you muttered once you were both inside.

minjeong walked in step beside you, adjusting her backpack like she was trying to stay casual. “i saw it.”

you passed a group of juniors huddled by the vending machines. someone laughed too loud and your stomach flipped.

“she didn’t even acknowledge me.”

“she’s doing what she thinks keeps her in control. that’s kind of her whole thing.” minjeong said, glancing sideways at you.

you kept walking towards your locker, not really focused on where your feet were taking you. “well it’s working. i feel like i got erased.”

minjeong sighed. “how do you actually feel?”

you leaned against your locker, the cold metal grounding you. “like i miss her. which is stupid.”

“it’s not stupid.”

“i thought that she really liked me. and now she won’t even look at me.”

minjeong gave you a long, quiet look. students passed around you, some bumping shoulders, some glancing curiously. but you didn’t care.

“she does. that’s the problem.”

you swallowed hard. then you opened your locker with shaking hands.

“she’s just not good at liking people in a… normal way.” minjeong added softly.

you didn’t respond. you couldn’t. because she was right. and you still wanted to be destroyed.

you weren’t ready for first period. you told yourself that you were, that you could do this — that it was just another class, just another morning, just another girl.

but it wasn’t. not when the girl was her.

you stepped through the classroom door like you didn’t spend the walk building yourself back up from the pieces she left you in. like you weren’t still thinking about friday.

you looked up — and there she was.

karina.

already seated, back straight, posture perfect, like always. she was angled toward the window, sunlight catching the edge of her cheekbone, making her look carved from marble. her expression was calm and composed. bored even. her fingers tapped against her notebook, idle and distracted.

she looked like someone who had never broken.

who had never begged.

who didn’t kiss you like you were air and she was drowning in an endless sea.

and that was when the first crack formed in your chest.

you slowed your steps. something in you was still hoping that she’d feel you. tbat she’d turn. that some invisible thread between you might tug hard enough to make her look.

she didn’t. not even a flicker. just stayed there, perfectly still, like you were nothing more than another body passing by.

you took your seat beside her — the same seat you filled for weeks now, the one she used to glance at before class, used to lean toward mid lecture, and used to brush her fingers against like it was an accident.

now? nothing. she didn’t shift away from you. but she didn’t acknowledge you either. and that absence was worse than if she’d flinched.

you glanced at her hands. you wanted to speak. you wanted to say her name. to whisper it the way she used to whisper yours when no one else was listening.

so you did. quietly. barely.

“karina.” she didn’t move. didn’t blink. didn’t even breathe differently. you felt your stomach drop. like something sacred had been lost. you said her name again. a little louder this time. like maybe she didn’t hear you. like maybe this was all just a misunderstanding.

still — nothing.

you sat there, hands folded in your lap, chest aching in that awful, familiar way. the one that doesn’t come from heartbreak, but from the silence that follows it. the teacher started talking. something about metaphor. something about illusions. something about how language can hide pain. it was almost funny. like the universe was in on the joke now.

you didn’t take notes. you just stared down at your paper, eyes unfocused, hands still. the urge to cry was heavy behind your eyes, but you didn’t let it win.

not here. and especially not next to her. not when she wouldn’t even give you the decency of a glance. your throat felt tight.

you turned your head just slightly, enough to see her in your peripheral. her mouth twitched at something the teacher said. the little smirk that was always on her face when she caught an inside joke that the rest of the class missed. you stared at her profile, memorizing it all over again. the sharpness of her jaw, the way her lashes curled slightly up at the ends, the way her lip twitched when she was holding something back.

but you didn’t know what she was holding back now. you didn’t even know if she cared anymore. maybe she never did. maybe she did too much.

god, you missed her. missed her so much you wanted to scream. but instead you sat there, painfully still, biting the inside of your cheek just to feel something that wasn’t her absence.

halfway through the class, your leg brushed hers. just barely. not enough to matter. not enough to be anything but coincidence.

but still. your heart stopped. but she didn’t move. she didn’t shift. she didn’t do anything. and that was the cruelest part. because even her nothing felt like a decision.

when the bell rang, you jolted. you looked at her before she could stand, desperate just for a moment. for something. for a glance. for a word. for proof that this wasn’t a dream.

she stood up, packed up, and walked away. no hesitation and no goodbye.

the second you stepped out of the classroom, you let out a breath that you didn’t even know you were holding. your heart had been holding out for a glance, a twitch, any sign — and you got absolutely nothing.

it was forty eight minutes of pretending you weren’t sitting right beside her. forty eight minutes of her not looking at you, not speaking to you, and not even acknowledging you existed in the same dimension.

and still. still, you found yourself staring at the way her fingers tapped the edge of her notebook. the way she pushed her hair behind her ear when she was focusing. you could practically recreate the sound of her sigh when she was bored. you hated how you noticed all of it. but you hated even more how you missed it.

you didn’t even realize you stopped walking until minjeong showed up beside you, sliding into your space like she had been watching you the whole time.

“you okay?” she asked.

you blinked like you were just waking up from a long sleep. “no.”

minjeong nodded once and leaned against the lockers. “she didn’t say a word. she didn’t even look at me. like i was never there.” you muttered, leaning beside her.

“she’s the goat at acting unbothered. it’s how she wins.” minjeong said, standing beside you with her arms crossed.

you scoffed. “well congrats to her. she’s winning.”

“i shouldn’t care this much. i really shouldn’t.” you said suddenly.

“maybe not. but you do.” minjeong said.

“i feel pathetic. i know she’s manipulative. i know she plays games. i know she’s probably never been in something real and i’m stupid for thinking it was.”

“i—“

“and i still want her.” minjeong hesitated, then nodded like she expected that answer. “i know.”

“it’s so dumb, right?” you laughed. “like, she’s probably already moved on. she has ning and aeri and her whole little kingdom and i’m over here acting like i just got ghosted by the girl i thought i’d get married to.”

minjeong turned fully to face you. “you’re not dumb. she’ll come back.” she said quietly.

“she already left.” before minjeong could respond, the classroom door behind you swung open. karina stepped out with her head high and face unreadable. she didn’t even scan the hallway. like she already knew exactly who was watching.

ning and aeri somehow followed behind. aeri was fixing her lip gloss in the reflection of the fire extinguisher case and ning said something that made karina smile. just barely.

you stood straighter before you could stop yourself and karina walked right toward you. your heart thudded. and then—

she brushed past minjeong’s shoulder. it wasn’t hard, but it wasn’t subtle either. minjeong went rigid beside you. you just froze.

karina didn’t even glance at you. didnt slow down either. just kept walking. “wow.” you whispered. minjeong exhaled slowly, eyes on karina’s back. “she’s annoying.”

you didn’t say anything. because you were too busy thinking about how the smell of her perfume still lingered in the air like a ghost.

“don’t say it.” minjeong warned but it was too late.

“i still want her.”

minjeong looked at you like she wanted to throw something — but then her face softened. “okay. then we’ll figure it out. together.” you looked down the hallway again.

you knew better. but you still wanted her anyway. and that was the worst part.

──────────౨ৎ───────────

lunch felt like detention. you and minjeong sat at her usual table near the back where the sunlight filtered through the trees and made everything feel a little too pretty for how awful your insides felt.

your tray was untouched. you picked at your food but mostly just peeled the label off your water bottle. minjeong was halfway through a fruit cup, watching you like you were going to die at any moment.

“okay.” she said finally, chewing slow. “what’s going on in that head of yours?” you didn’t answer right away. just stared out across the lawn where karina sat with ning and aeri. she had her sunglasses pushed up on her head and was sipping from a little matcha bottle.

you wanted to scream. or cry. or maybe just lie down with your face in the grass.

instead, you spoke. “i want to talk to her.”

minjeong paused mid bite. “no.”

“just for a second.”

“no.”

“i just want to—”

“no.”

you tore your eyes away from karina to look at her. “you don’t even know what i was gonna say.”

“you were gonna walk over there and say something stupid like ‘can we talk?’ or ‘was any of it real?’ or ‘why are you acting like i’m invisible?’ and then she was gonna stare up at you with those bambi eyes and say something cryptic that makes you feel like you’re insane.”

you stared. “okay, that’s… exactly what I was gonna do.”

“i know.” minjeong muttered. “because i did it. twice. and both times i ended up crying in the art room and texting my ex from eighth grade.” you dropped your head onto your folded arms and groaned into your hoodie sleeve. “why is she like this?”

“because she doesn’t know how to just like someone.” you turned your head to look at her. “it’s not even that i want her to explain. i just— i don’t know. i just want her to look at me. like i matter. like i’m not some phase she already grew out of.”

minjeong’s face softened. “you do matter.”

“not to her.”

“that’s not true.”

“the why hasn’t she said anything? why is she pretending i don’t exist?”

minjeong looked down at her tray for a second. “because she’s scared.”

“of what? me? i’m literally the one crying into my lunch.”

“she’s scared that if she looks at you, it’ll undo her. and she’s spent years building a version of herself that doesn’t fall apart for anyone.”

gou sat back up, arms wrapped around yourself. “so what? i’m just supposed to sit here and wait for her to be brave?”

“i’m not saying wait. i’m saying… don’t walk into the lion’s den. with raw meat.”

you frowned. “what if i don’t care anymore? what if i’d rather be hurt than ignored?”

minjeong shook her head slowly. “that’s not power, y/n. that’s a slow motion heartbreak.”

you didn’t respond. your eyes wandered again, almost involuntarily, back to karina. she was laughing at something that aeri said. her hand rested loosely on her knee. she hasn’t looked your way once.

“i miss her so much i feel sick.” you whispered.

“i know.”

you didn’t speak for a while after that. the wind moved gently through the trees, scattering cherry blossom petals onto your table.

“i think she misses you too.” minjeong added after a long pause.

you looked at her. “then why won’t she say it?”

“because if she does, she’ll have to admit she messed up. and yu jimin doesn’t apologize. she rewrites the narrative.”

you pressed your lips together. “i want her to miss me. but not like this.” you said.

minjeong reached across the table and squeezed your hand. “remember. don’t go to her yet.”

you hesitated. swallowed down everything desperate sitting in your throat.

“okay.” you whispered.

but when karina stood up a minute later, tossing her hair back and laughing at something that ning said, your eyes followed her all the way across the courtyard.

and when she didn’t look back? it hurt anyway.

the day dragged. it felt like being underwater. every class was a blur of muffled voices and moving people, and you were just floating through it. you kept checking your phone even though you knew there’d be nothing from her.

you were used to the intensity. the eye contact that burned, the touches that lingered, the possessive glances from across the room. even when she was being cold, it was calculated. a push and pull. a game.

but now it was absence. silence so loud that it made you ache. she hasn’t looked at you once. not in the hallways. not in any period. not when she passed by your locker with aeri, close enough that you could smell her perfume.

not once.

you caught yourself turning around too quick when you thought you heard her laugh. you stopped breathing every time someone said her name in passing. you wanted to hate her. but really, you just miss her.

by the time the final bell rang, your chest felt hollow.

you stayed in your seat after class, pretending to dig through your backpack just so you wouldn’t have to walk into the hallway crowd yet. just so you wouldn’t have to see her leaving without even looking back. again.

eventually, you forced yourself up and wandered down the hall with your head low and hoodie up. your phone buzzed once in your pocket, but it was nothing that mattered.

minjeong found you by the benches out front, sitting on the concrete with your arms around your knees like a sulking child. she didn’t say anything at first. just plopped down beside you with a loud sigh.

“is she still pretending you’re air?” you nodded. the two of you sat in silence for a while, watching cars pull in and students walk out. the sky was starting to go gold at the edges, the sun bleeding into soft pink. you used to love this hour. now it just made your stomach hurt.

“i thought maybe she would chase me. or at least try.” you admitted. “she will. but only when she realizes she doesn’t know how to win without you.” minjeong said.

you swallowed. “and what if she doesn’t?”

“then that’s not someone you want to spend your heart on.”

that sentence settled between you both. it was heavy and real. you nodded slowly. “okay.”

minjeong stood up and held out her hand. “come on. let’s get food before you start crying.”

you let her pull you up. you didn’t feel better. not really. but at least you weren’t sitting alone anymore. at least someone still looked at you like you mattered. you take one last glance toward the student lot. karina wasn’t there.

she left without you. again. and it still hurt. even though you knew it would.

two days. forty eight hours. one hundred and forty four thousand seconds. you weren’t counting or anything. it was terrifying how quickly pain could become routine. you walked into school with minjeong like nothing was wrong. like it was just another day. like the ghost of someone you used to mean something to wasn’t standing ten feet away, laughing at something ning whispered to her.

the worst part? you were still trying to get her attention.

you shouldn’t have put this outfit on. you told yourself that like three times in the mirror before leaving the house. you told yourself that it didn’t matter. that she wouldn’t care. that she wouldn’t look.

but you still wore it. your top was a little shorter than usual, hem brushing just above your waistband. your hair was done and you even had on makeup. it wasn’t full revenge dress level, but it was enough to make your pulse quicken when you walked past a window.

minjeong didn’t say anything at first when she saw you that morning. she just raised an eyebrow. “you tryna be subtle, or…?”

“shut up. i didn’t even think about it.” you muttered, cheeks already warning. she gave you a look. “mhm.”

karina looked good. of course she did. she always did when you didn’t want her to.

minjeong’s hand brushed yours as you froze halfway through the doorway. “keep walking.”

“i wasn’t gonna stop.” you muttered but your voice sounded fragile.

“uh huh.”

you forced your feet to move.

“she didn’t look at me.” you said once you passed by, low enough that only minjeong could hear.

“she hasn’t looked at you in two days.” she replied. it wasn’t unkind.

“yeah. well… it still sucks.”

minjeong didn’t say anything for a moment. you could feel her glancing at you sideways, but you didn’t meet her eyes.

minjeong finally spoke, voice softer now. “you know this isn’t really about you, right?”

“what?”

“she’s not ignoring you because you did something wrong. well— i know for a fact she’s ignoring you because she’s trying not to fall apart in front of you.”

“then why does she look so fine?” you snapped, louder than you meant to.

a freshman walking by gave you a weird look. you bit your tongue.

minjeong touched your arm gently. “because that’s her thing. she controls the narrative.”

you stopped at your locker. “well she’s doing a damn good job.”

“she’s watching you, you know. she just waits until you’re not looking.”

you laughed bitterly. “i am looking. constantly.”

minjeong smiled. “i know.”

you didn’t say anything. you just leaned your forehead against the locker, trying not to feel every emotion pressing against your body.

“she’s ignoring me like i never meant anything. i feel invisible.”

minjeong’s voice dropped. “you’re not.” you pulled your books out and closed the locker too fast. the bang made you flinch.

“i just want her to talk to me. even if it’s just to say she hates me for walking away.” you said quietly, but minjeong didn’t respond. you walked toward first period with the girl you couldn’t stop chasing ignoring you like it was her job.

──────────౨ৎ───────────

first period was the same as yesterday.

you wanted her to look at you so bad it hurt. you wanted her to lean over and whisper some sarcastic comment under her breath. you wanted her to bump your shoulder again and let it linger. you wanted anything. but she gave you nothing.

and when the bell finally rang, she stood up smooth and fast, like she was escaping a crime scene or something. she walked out without a single glance back. and you sat there wondering how the hell you were supposed to keep surviving this.

you didn’t even wait for the bell to stop echoing. the second the door opened, you were on your feet, grabbing your bag and slipping into the hallway like you could outrun the ache sitting in your chest.

but of course minjeong was already waiting outside, leaning against the wall with her arms crossed and that quiet concern all over her face.

you didn’t even say anything. just walked straight into her side and sighed so hard it felt like your lungs gave up. she straightened a little. “that bad?”

you blinked at the ceiling. “she didn’t even blink.” minjeong nodded slowly then nudged your elbow. “wanna walk?”

you did. so you walked, blending into the current of students flowing through the hallway. you were pretending your stomach wasn’t doing somersaults every time someone passed by who even vaguely looked like her. it was stupid. but everything felt kind of stupid now.

you cleared your throat. “i’m even starting to miss ning and aeri.” minjeong laughed. “you hated ning. she scared the hell out of you.”

“she still does. but at least she talked to me.” you said. minjeong raised her eyebrows like she was trying not to laugh again. “talked to you or tormented you?”

you cracked a weak smile. “same difference.” there was a moment of silence for a while before you spoke again. “i don’t know. i just… i miss them. like, their weird dynamic. the whole table. it was dramatic and terrifying, but it felt like something. and now it’s just gone.”

“because karina made herself the center of it. and she’s decided to disappear, so that means everyone around her does too.” minjeong said. you didn’t respond. you couldn’t. because she was right.

karina wasn’t just ignoring you. she was deleting herself. from your days, your space, and your routine. like she was trying to leave a karina shaped hole behind just to see how long it would take you to collapse into it. and it was working.

the warning bell rang and you both slowed in front of your lockers. minjeong opened hers and looked over at you. “do you wanna skip lunch? just us. outside. behind the gym or something.” you looked down the hallway.

somewhere, karina was laughing at something ning said. walking too close with aeri. replacing you like it was nothing. and still, some part of you wanted to chase her down the hall and just ask her why.

“no. i think i wanna be here she can see me.” you said. minjeong looked at you for a second. “you sure?”

“no.” you admitted. but part of you still had hope.

but now, walking into the cafeteria beside her, that hope felt heavier. especially when you caught sight of them. her table. karina was already there, leaning back in her seat like she owned the air. one arm was hanging lazily across the backrest, fingers tapping against the table in some rhythm. ning was mid story like always. karina didn’t look at you. but ning did.

her eyes flicked over your outfit, brows rising with an amused kinda interest. she leaned toward karina to say something, and you saw karina’s fingers still for half a second. her jaw twitched. but she didn’t turn. she didn’t look. you hated that it still got to you.

“she saw you.” minjeong said under her breath, walking just a step behind you now. “she didn’t.”

“she did. i know her. she noticed you the second you walked in.” minjeong insisted. you kept your eyes on the empty table near the windows. “then why won’t she look?”

“because looking at you would mean admitting you still have that effect.” you didn’t respond. just sank into the seat and tried not to look back. tried not to give in to that aching part of you that wanted to know if karina was still leaning back or if she had shifted forward. if her arms were still folded or if she crossed her legs like she always did when something made her tense.

you picked at the edge of your tray, your food untouched. minjeong watched you for a long moment before sighing. “y/n.”

“what?”

“you look hot. like hot hot.” you stared. “okay?”

“and you’re sitting here acting like the world ended.” you cracked a small smile. “it kind of did.”

minjeong didn’t answer. but a moment later, her foot tapped yours under the table.

“she’s gonna break. i don’t know when, but she will.” she said. you nodded like you believed her but your eyes drifted back towards karina anyway. just for a second. that was enough. because she still wasn’t looking. and you still couldn’t stop hoping she would.

lunch went on without her. without them. without ning’s loud laugh echoing off the walls or aeri’s sarcastic commentary. without karina’s voice saying your name like it was always supposed to be hers. you hated that you noticed the difference. that the silence at your table felt too huge in contrast. you hated that you were still hoping she would look over.

you saw karina shift in your peripheral. she was standing now. her tray was picked up and ning was still talking while aeri followed behind. karina walked slowly as if she had all the time in the world. as if you weren’t holding your breath without meaning to.

she passed by your table. and for a second — a millisecond — her shoulder barely angled toward you. you could’ve sworn that she hesitated. that her fingers clenched around the tray just slightly. but she didn’t stop. didn’t look. minjeong kicked you lightly under the table. “you okay?”

“i’m fine.” you whispered. you weren’t.

you waited five more minutes after they left before standing up, pretending to throw your trash away. minjeong followed and you both drifted towards the side hallway that led to the vending machines. and that’s where it happened. you turned the corner too fast. so did she.

karina. it was just you and her.

she froze a step too late, nearly walking straight into you. her tray was gone now. she had a bottle of water in her hand and a blank expression on her face, but her eyes finally landed on yours for the first time in days and everything stopped.

you felt your heart slam hard against your chest, like it forgot how to beat without her. like you weren’t just pretending to be okay minutes ago.

she didn’t say anything. but you didn’t either. you could hear minjeong’s footsteps slow behind you, like she was giving you space but not too much.

karina looked at you. not past you. not around you. at you. and you, pathetic, hopeful, and still down bad, looked right back. it was silent between you two. you opened your mouth, not even knowing what to say but just knowing that you needed to say something.

but she was already moving again. her shoulder passed yours like nothing happened and her perfume hit a moment later.

you didn’t turn around. minjeong caught up, her voice low. “y/n…” you just shook your head, barely breathing. “i’m fine.” you weren’t.

you stood there for a few seconds longer, staring down the hallway. “i literally can’t take another day of this.”

the final bell rang like an afterthought. you didn’t move at first. you just sat there, staring at the front of the classroom as people scraped chairs and zipped backpacks and sprinted into the hallway with that end of day energy. it all felt far away, like you were watching a movie of your own life, stuck in the scene where nothing really happens. minjeong gave your arm a light nudge. “you good?”

you nodded, too quickly. “yeah. yeah, i’m fine.” you stood up, legs a little too heavy, spending the entire day dragging around a version of yourself. one that still thought karina might look your way. one that still thought maybe you would brush hands in the hallway. or maybe that she would stop pretending. she didn’t.

not during first period, not in the hallway, and not at lunch — especially not at lunch when you almost walked straight into her and she barely blinked. and still, your heart jumped at the memory.

you hated how badly you wanted her attention. how you still checked the hallways for her. how you still remembered exactly how she looked leaning against your locker two weeks ago like she owned the air you breathed. now she didn’t even want to share it with you.

the walk through the hall felt slower than usual. you followed minjeong silently, walking on your usual route home until you both ended up outside on the bleachers behind the school. it was quiet out there.

you dropped your bag and sat down while minjeong sat beside you, breaking the silence first. “she’s trying so hard not to break. but she’s close. i’ve seen her like this before.” you hugged your knees to your chest. “why is she even doing this? i’m the one who should be mad.”

“she’s scared.” minjeong shrugged. “scared that she let you in and showed you too much.” you went quiet. then you let out a quiet, bitter laugh.

“you warned me.”

“i did. but i also get it in a way.” she said gently. suddenly, you felt stupid for expecting it to be easier for you.

“you think she ever really meant it?” you asked. “all of it? the way she held my hand and the late night texts. the stuff she said on the rooftop…” minjeong was quiet again. then she nodded. “i think she meant every word. i also think she’s terrified of meaning anything. so when it gets too real, she either pulls you in harder or pushes you away.” she added.

you swallowed the lump in your throat. “feels like she chose the second one.”

minjeong nudged her shoulder against yours. “she always chooses both. just never at the same time.” you didn’t respond. because even if that was true, it still wasn’t enough. you were still waiting for her to prove it.

you were so tired. not just sleepy tired. not just i stayed up too late tired either. you felt like your body was dragging itself through the morning on autopilot while your mind somewhere far behind. you barely remembered what you picked to wear. just that it was comfortable. not cute. not for her.

you made it through your front door and into the school building without looking around. no scanning the halls. no pausing at the entrance to see who was by the lockers. you didn’t want to see her today. well maybe you did, but not like this. not with your heart willingly cracked open and your face obviously drained.

minjeong found you by your locker. she didn’t say anything at first. just leaned beside you. “did you sleep?” she asked eventually, quiet enough that only you could hear. you shook your head in response. “kinda. not really.” minjeong studied your face. “you look like you’ve been thinking too hard.”

“i’ve been trying not to think about her.” you muttered. “i’m not even mad anymore. i just miss her. and that feels worse than being ignored.” you added.

minjeong leaned her head back against the locker, staring at the ceiling tiles. “missing someone who’s still around is the worst kind of heartbreak.”

the hall was slowly filling up. you didn’t look for karina. you told yourself not to, repeated it like a mantra. but your eyes still drifted down the hallway anyway. she wasn’t there. and that was somehow worse.

you sighed. “i feel like i’m dying a little.”

“don’t say that.” she nudged your side. “come on. we have first period.”

you stood up straighter, grabbing your stuff. the ache in your chest didn’t shrink, but it felt a little less harsh with minjeong beside you. you didn’t know how today would go. if karina would look at you or not. but for now, you followed minjeong down the hallway. and you didn’t look back, even though you wanted to.

first period felt like a joke the universe was playing on you. you walked into class a little later than usual and you didn’t even realize how much hope you still had until it immediately deflated the second you saw her already in her seat.

same posture. same blank face. same casual lean in her chair like nothing was different. she didn’t look up. you moved to your seat beside her, careful not to bump anything or make a sound, like she was a deer and you didn’t want to scare her. not that she was scared of you. she just didn’t seem to care anymore.

you sat down. your bag hit the floor and your elbow barely brushed the edge of her desk as you settled in, and there was nothing. she just stared ahead while waiting for the teacher, perfectly unaffected.

“alright. pair up. group work today.” your teacher said, clapping his hands once like it would inject energy into a room full of barely awake teenagers.

you didn’t even process the assignment. didn’t really care what the topic was. all your brain registered was pair up and the panic that immediately followed. because she was right next to you. because of course you’ll be paired with her. that’s how the seats worked. you’ve been next to each other for weeks. you’ve been sharing pens, stealing glances, breathing in sync. you kissed her. you slept in her bed. and now you couldn’t even ask her what page you were supposed to be on.

you glanced over. she was already turning towards you like she had been prepared for this. her expression was unreadable. it was blank, smooth, and calm. the kind of mask she wore when she didn’t want you to know what she was thinking. you hated how much you still found it pretty.

you sat up straighter, trying to match her energy. “page sixty four.” she said flatly, not looking at you as she flipped open the book. her voice hit you harder than you expected. you haven’t heard it in days. at least not directed at you, and not this close.

you tried not to react. “okay.” you said, as flat. just as empty. she slid her copy between the two of you without asking. your eyes flicked to her hand, resting on the edge of the page. her nails were painted the same shade they were the last time she touched your face.

the assignment was something about literary analysis, metaphors or whatever, but you couldn’t concentrate. you were still waiting for her to break. to say something. but she stayed quiet, jotting notes neatly in the margin of her textbook. you stared at the same sentence for a full minute.

“i can handle the first half.” she said without looking at you. you nodded slowly, even though she wasn’t looking to see it. “i’ll finish the second.”

it was silent again. the clock ticked too loud. your heart ticked louder. you leaned your cheek against your hand, slouching a little. it wasn’t fully because you were tired. you just didn’t want her to see the look on your face. you didn’t want her to see how much you missed her.

you peeked at her one more time. and for the smallest second, she was already looking. your eyes locked. it wasn’t long. half a second, maybe. but it was enough.

enough to make your pulse trip. enough to see the tiniest crack in her expression before she looked away, jaw tightening. you stared at for her a moment longer, wishing she would do it again. wishing she would speak. but she didn’t. just kept writing like it meant nothing. like you were nothing.

so you turned back to your own notes.

──────────౨ৎ───────────

you didn’t even wait for the bell to finish ringing. the second class ended, you slammed your laptop shut and shoved it into your bag before grabbing it. minjeong was already waiting in the hallway, leaning against the wall with that soft look of concern she wore just for you now. you barely reached her before it all started spilling out.

“she literally looked me in the eyes for and a second. half a second, minjeong. and then nothing. just—cold air. like i’m delusional. like i imagined it.” minjeong started walking beside you, already nodding. “i figured. you looked like you were about to die.”

“i was about to die.” you huffed, crossing your arms. “she spoke to me once. one singular time. just to say the page number like we’re coworkers or something. she doesn’t even call me by my name anymore.”

minjeong side eyed you. “you want her to call you what? baby?”

you shoved her arm lightly but it didn’t wipe the frustrated look from your face. “i want her to stop acting like we weren’t all over eachother two weeks ago. like i didn’t— like we didn’t— god.”

“i’m going insane. i would literally take crumbs. a nod. anything.” you tugged on your sleeve. she didn’t say anything, but you knew what she wanted to say. you couldn’t survive on crumbs. but you still looked for them. you still watched the cafeteria doors just in case karina walked through first. you still wanted to be noticed.

you nodded along to whatever minjeong was saying now, but your eyes kept flicking to the door like they had a mind of their own. it was automatic and you hated that you were still hoping she would look for you too. then the doors swung open like some movie cue.

karina stepped through, light from outside catching on her hair, making it glow. ning and aeri trailed behind her laughing about something you couldn’t hear. karina didn’t laugh, but her lip twitched enough to tell you she was in it. existing fully in a world that did not include you. minjeong slowed down like she was bracing for it before it happened.

karina looked up and saw you. just for a second. a single second. her eyes flicked up and locked onto yours.

your breath caught. it was nothing but everything. she didn’t look surprised. she didn’t look angry. she didn’t look away. but she didn’t smile either. she just blinked and then turned. ning glanced at you mid laugh then quickly looked away.

“she saw me.” you said quietly, voice barely audible over the cafeteria noise. “i know.” minjeong replied just as quiet. you blinked hard and sat down before your legs gave out. you had no appetite and no energy to fake it. your heartbeat felt like it lived in your throat. you swallowed once. then again. “i thought maybe today…” you started and then shook your head. “doesn’t matter.” but you kept looking and karina never turned back.

first period felt louder than usual. the classroom was rowdy and your teacher was over it before 8:10. he vaguely waved a hand and told you all to “be productive.”

she didn’t look up when you sat beside her. just kept typing something on her laptop, hair tucked behind one ear and the sleeves of her sweatshirt pushed up to her elbows. her expression didn’t change. not even when your knees knocked gently under the desk.

“hey.” you offered quietly. “morning.” she replied without looking. it was already more than you got the day before. pathetic how you counted that as progress. she was still karina, though. you watched her scroll through a shared doc and for a second, your brain was like, this is the same girl who kissed you with her hand around your neck three weeks ago.

around the room, your classmates were already giving up on focus. someone was blasting tiktoks at full volume. someone else was recording them. karina finally spoke. “we should move.” you turned. “what?”

“it’s loud in here. let’s go the library.” she said simply, still not looking at you. you nodded. maybe a little too fast. “okay.”

she shut her laptop and slid it into her bag and you followed her out of the room without saying a word. the walk down the hallway was quiet. tension crackled between you like static, unspoken and unbearable. karina moved ahead of you and for a second you wondered if she was doing it on purpose. staying far enough that your shoulder couldn’t brush hers. you hated how much you wanted it to brush hers.

the library was half empty and you picked a table in the back, out of sight, tucked behind a bookshelf. she sat across from you and pulled out her laptop again like this was any other day. like she wasn’t breaking your heart in silence.

you opened your laptop and stared at it. karina didn’t say anything for a while. eventually, you broke. “i can’t focus when you’re like this.” her fingers paused on the keyboard then resumed. “like what?”

you looked at her. her face was unreadable, perfectly neutral, but her jaw was tight. “like nothing happened.”

karina didn’t meet your eyes. “we have a project.”

“karina.” that was when she sighed, finally glancing at you. her voice was soft but cool. “what do you want me to do?”

“i don’t know. look at me like you used to?” you whispered. her lips parted for half a second and then they closed. she leaned back slightly, watching you now. “i’m trying not to.” she admitted.

“why?”

“because if i start, i won’t stop.” the air stilled. her voice was too calm. like she was keeping herself from revealing everything she’s been hiding for the past five days. you stared at her, voice barely audible. “is that a threat or a promise?”

karina exhaled sharply. it was almost a scoff. but it wasn’t mean, it was just tired. “don’t tempt me right now.” and for a second, it was like the old current ran between you. electric, familiar, and addicting. you looked away first. she leaned forward, fingers tapping back at the trackpad like nothing had happened. “we need to finish the outline.”

you nodded, swallowing down everything else you wanted to say. but beneath the table, your feet brushed. and this time, she didn’t pull away.

this wasn’t fair. because she shouldn’t have been able to sit across from you like this, calm and composed, while your insides were on fire. she shouldn’t have been able to pretend like none of this was a big deal, like she didn’t know exactly how to get under your skin with one look. “i hate this.” you blurted again before you could stop yourself. karina tilted her head. “hate what?”

“you. this. the whole ‘barely speaking, but sitting two feet apart’ thing. i—” you stopped yourself, rubbing your temple like it might smooth over the emotional blowout. “it’s driving me insane.” her expression didn’t change right away, but something in her posture softened just slightly. her hand stopped hovering over the keyboard. “you think it’s easy for me?” she said quietly and you looked at her, annoyed now. “you’re the one acting like none of it mattered.”

“it mattered. that’s the problem.” she said, voice steady but low. she closed her laptop slowly, folding her arms on the table. “forget me and move on.“

“i don’t want to move on.” you whispered. she finally held your gaze and that was the end of it for you. you pushed your notebook aside and stood up before your thoughts could catch up. she looked up at you, confused for half a second until you came around the table and sat next to her. closer than you needed to. closer than you should’ve. her breath hitched. just a little.

“i know i shouldn’t.” you said almost to yourself. karina didn’t move. “then don’t.”

“i miss you.” you said and she closed her eyes for a moment, jaw tight. then she opened them slowly, eyes scanning your face like she was trying to memorize it. “you’re really not making this easy.”

“you were never easy.” you said and when she let out the softest laugh, you felt yourself fall all over again. you didn’t kiss her. but you wanted to. your knee pressed into hers beneath the table. and now, neither of you pulled away.

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you didn’t say much as the final bell rang. just packed up your things and let the weight of everything settle over your shoulders. outside of the classroom, minjeong was already waiting, leaning against the wall like she had been there for a while. she raised an eyebrow when she saw your face. you both stepped out into the afternoon sun, squinting a little. the light was too golden and too soft for how tired you felt.

the air was warm in that almost summer way, cicadas were humming in the distance, and minjeong nudged your elbow lightly. “you look like you just got hit by a truck.” she said, falling into step beside you. you scoffed under your breath. “it was more of an emotional car crash, actually.”

she laughed. “let me guess. she said one thing and now you’re freaking out.”

“she cares. she told me not to move on.” you said and minjeong made a face. “that’s so karina coded. saying just enough to keep you around, but not enough to actually say anything.” you knew she was right, but still. you couldn’t stop replaying the look in karina’s eyes when she said it. it wasn’t manipulative. it was like she really meant it.

you didn’t realize you were smiling like an idiot until minjeong groaned beside you. “oh my god. you’re literally happy about crumbs. like— dust. emotional lint. she gave you a vague ass sentence and you’re glowing.”

“i’m not glowing.”

“you’re glowing pathetically.” you elbowed her. “shut up.” but the truth was that you were glowing. just a little. it was embarrassing how much you missed her. how her silence felt like a punishment and a safety net at the same time. how the smallest bit of softness from her made you feel like maybe you weren’t crazy after all. you were halfway across the parking lot when you heard someone call your name.

“y/n!” you turned, blinking into the sunlight. it was sunghoon. he was standing off to the side near the bike racks, leaning casually against the metal frame like this was a totally casual encounter. he was obviously waiting. “hey.” you said in an uncertain tone, slowing your pace.

minjeong instinctively stayed close, watching him with an unreadable expression. he pushed off the bike rack, shoving his hands into his pockets. “i was hoping i would see you today.”

“oh?”

he shrugged. “yeah. i, uh… i’ve been meaning to talk to you.” you raised an eyebrow and minjeong shifted slightly beside you, silent but very much tuned in. “i just— look, this might be a little random… but i always thought you were cute. since, like… the first week.” he said, suddenly less smooth than usual. that made you pause. “what?”

“i mean, i didn’t say anything because karina was… you know. karina. she was clealy on you. i figured i didn’t stand a chance.” he smiled, but there was a flicker of hesitation in it. your pulse jumped. not because of him, but because you could feel eyes on you. you didn’t even have to look to know who it was. you felt the shift in gravity.

karina. you glanced over your shoulder, and there she was. across the lot, standing by her car with her keys dangling in her hand. aeri was saying something to her, probably teasing or talking about weekend plans, but karina wasn’t listening. she was locked onto you. not just looking — watching. like a lion behind glass. composed but far from calm.

sunghoon kept talking, oblivious. “anyway. i just figured… i don’t know, maybe things were different now. with you and her. are they?” he asked it so casually. but it echoed like a gunshot in your head. are they?

you didn’t answer right away. you could say no. you could say yes. you could pretend like this didn’t mean anything at all. but karina was still staring and your heart was beating in your throat. it made something inside you want to do something stupid inside you wanted to make her feel it. so you tilted your head before smiling. just barely.

“maybe.” you said softly. minjeong shifted beside you. sunghoon smiled like he just scored. but your eyes never left karina and hers never left you.

the hallway buzzed with post lunch noise. you were walking between sunghoon and minjeong and you could feel karina watching. you didn’t even have to look to know she was. sunghoon was saying something stupid about the vending machines always stealing his change and minjeong hummed beside you, arms crossed and suspiciously quiet. you tried to laugh along, nodding at the right times but your eyes kept flickering across the hallway.

she was leaning against the lockers, arms crossed and black sleeves pushed to her elbows. one ankle was crossed over the other. her eyes were unreadable from this distance, but you didn’t need to see them to feel the burn of her gaze.

so when she pushed off the wall and started walking — towards you — you genuinely thought she might just pass you by again. but instead, she stopped right in front of you. sunghoon faltered beside you, brows rising slightly. minjeong stiffened. “y/n.” karina said, like it wasn’t the first time she said your name a thousand different ways in her head.

“yeah?”

her voice was calm. a little too calm. “you wanna go to the library?” youstared at her for a second too long.

“right now?”

“yeah.” she paused. “for the project.” you glanced over at minjeong who just blinked once. it was one that said don’t look at me. sunghoon shifted beside you, awkward now.

“…sure.” you said. too quickly. karina nodded once. no thanks, no smile. just turned and started walking like she already knew you’d follow. and of course you did. you trailed behind her as the hallways noise faded behind you, the distance between you and the other two widening with each step. you didn’t say anything. you couldn’t. your heart was loud in your ears and karina’s silence felt heavier than anything you’ve ever carried.

she didn’t lead you toward the library.

you noticed the detour around the back staircase instantly, but you still followed. the moment you saw the door to the rooftop ahead, something in you twisted. “karina.” you said softly.

she didn’t look at you. she just opened the door and slipped through like this wasn’t completely, obviously not the library. you hesitated then stepped through.

the door clicked shut behind you, city buzzing quietly below. the rooftop was empty and the sky was a wash of soft blue and silver clouds. karina stood by the railing, facing away. her hands were gripping the edge. you didn’t speak. for a long minute, neither of you did.

you swallowed hard. “why are we here?” you asked finally. your voice sounded too small and you almost frowned when she didn’t turn. “because i couldn’t do it anymore.”

“…do what?” your fingers tightened on the railing. “pretend i don’t care.” she said, but her voice was shaky around the edges. the silence that followed was sharp and you couldn’t help but step closer. “then why did you?”

she was still facing away from you. “because i care too much.”

“i don’t know what you do to me, y/n, but you’re the only person who makes me feel like i don’t have control. everything is just a reflex with you and i— i don’t trust what i’ll do next.” you could see her posture shifting slightly, crossing her arms. your teeth found the inside of your jaw and pulled.

“and seeing you with sunghoon? god, i really wanted to text his coach. i don’t know if he thought i was joking when i warned him the first time.” your eyes widened slightly. that’s what that one day was about. you tugged on your bottom lip.

“but i knew you wouldn’t have liked it and i didn’t wanna mess this up even more. not when i’m aching to hear your laugh again. and not just now, even when i’m trying not to. even when i’m lying in bed, forcing myself not to text you. even when i know i don’t deserve it.” she admitted and your throat burned.

you wanted to search her face — for guilt, for games, for anything that would make this feel safer. “i’ve never felt like this. i’ve never wanted someone like this. it’s terrifying. i think about you more than i think about anything else.” she said.

you exhaled shakily. “that’s not normal.”

“i know. but it’s you.” she said and your hands curled into fists at your sides. “why now?”

“because if i don’t say it now, i might see you with him again. i might lose someone who makes me feel something again. and i can’t.”

you looked down, overwhelmed. “karina…”

“i know i don’t deserve to ask you for anything. but i’m still going to.” she said, stepping closer. you looked up and her eyes met yours like it hurt her.

“come back. let me try again. let me do it right this time.” she whispered. she looked at you then and you didn’t think anyone has ever looked at you like that. like she was seeing something she’s been searching for in other people for years but never quite found until you. you wanted to believe her so bad. so bad that it hurt.

so you did, and she waited. not for a dramatic moment. not for control. just for you. and when you didn’t step back, didn’t say no, didn’t leave shut the door behind you and walk away, she smiled. slow and sure.

“i win.” she whispered. your heart stopped.

“what?”

“whatever game you think we’re playing.”

taglist — @saysirhc @m00nqvv @yuyuy90 (@spidrgamer @sh1ba100 @1800hotnfunn @hopeless-y)

#wanna make you mine — yjm #aespa #aespa imagines #aespa x fem reader #aespa x reader #aespa karina #aespa yu jimin #karina x reader #karina imagines #yu jimin x reader #yu jimin #wlw #wlw post #long reads #long fic #karina x fem reader

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