#ahhaha only handfuls are able to handle other handfuls

[aceofshitposts]

I saw that you like CATS the musical. What are your thoughts on the movie?

AAAAH AHHAHA oh man oh boy y'all should BUCKLE IN cuz it's a ride

my simple thoughts? it's entertaining if only because it butchered the stage show so badly in an attempt to idk modernize it? Well, modernization is one part of it I think. The other part I'll go into below lol. I don't necessarily hate some of the more modern renditions of the songs (mostly the ensemble sets like Jellicle Song for Jellicle Cats) but then others are just... so poorly done it's insulting.

I've said this at the end of this whole rant too but I'm gonna put it up here in case people don't (justifiably) wanna see me go on and on about it:

The movie wasn't made for fans of the musical. It was made to make money and I believe they choose, at least partially, to do that through making it the weirdest and worst possible adaptation they could so that people would want to go see the train wreck. Which, really, worked! It was all people could talk about for a good while so like... Goal achieved, I guess.

A MUCH MORE COMPREHENSIVE ANALYSIS UNDER THE CUT cuz i don't wanna. flood your dash with... this

ALRIGHT SO. Most of my friends know I'm actually a huge fan of new adaptations of things. I love remakes (provided the people making it are coming at it with some form of heart and not just... cash grabbing which is more often the case) I love seeing other peoples interpretations of characters, or changing settings. It's one of the reasons I like American comics so much, getting to see different writers takes is fascinating.

I think musical movies can be wonderful ways to introduce people to a stage show that might have been unavailable to them otherwise! Chicago, for example, is one of the BEST musical to movie adaptations in my opinion. It kept the heart of the show, it's funny and the song numbers are done really well.

There are of course other famous examples, such as Grease or Bye Bye Birdie. Hairspray was also a wonderful take. These are simply off the top of my head, there are of course more.

CATS in particular has a history. If you go through my CATS tag you may see a few posts from @catsnonreplica which posts photos from non broadway productions of CATS! It's a fascinating read and I love, love, love looking at the other interpretations of the characters! CATS is a musical full of fun and wonderful characters if you take the time to see past the ridiculousness haha and the Korean and Japanese runs of CATS especially have some of my favourites.

How does this relate to the movie, I hear you say well. As you might has noticed the movie's interpretations of the characters is........ lackluster at best and downright uncanny valley at best.

CATS is, at its core, a ridiculous thing. I will fully admit that! But it's fun, it's entertaining and if you pay a little attention you can actually get the plot. (Honestly I don't understand when people complain it has no plot but that's a whole other rant for another day)

The movie was... obsessed with this idea of like... semi realism? Like obviously, as a fan, I think they should have leaned into the over the top character designs but instead we got...w ell:

Bombalurina:

Demeter left and Bomba right. Demeter was actually cut! From the movie which is. upsetting lmao.

Macavity is one of the worst offenders for me:

Macavity was... I wish I could know what the hell they were thinking there cuz it's even in his song? Ginger cat??? THAT IS NOT... A GINGER CAT...... but I digress. I would show more examples but I think you get the point.

So. We've butchered the characters appearances. Okay that's fine but what about their personalities?

ALSO BUTCHERED.

There's... there's a lot to unpack here. Just for context: the Jellicle Ball happens once a year and the Jellicle leader chooses a single cat to be reborn into a new life. In the stage play all the cats who are nominated for this honour are on the older side (Jenny-Any-Dots, Bustopher Jones, Skimbleshanks, Gus The Theatre Cat, and eventually Grizzabella) AND are always nominated by another cat. Not themself, unlike the movie where they all seem to nominate themselves.

Jenny-Any-Dots went from a doting grandmother figure who's celebrated for her selfless volunteering and tireless work into a conceited, vain younger cat who is obsessed with fame.

It's an incredibly strange dichotomy. I don't doubt some of it isn't the result of the uh people playing the characters honestly. I do think some of them did the best they could! I don't really blame Jason Derulo, for example, for Tugger. And honestly, Tugger was probably closest to his stage version (while being a trouble maker, he's shown to show Deuteronomy an immense amount of respect)

Speaking of Tugger! This will bring us to one of the biggest grievances with the movie and that is how they handled Mr Mistoffelees.

So... Ugh. So. We have Victoria as the pov character, which imo is like whatever in the grand scheme of things, and then we have Misto who they have decided will be get live interest cuz... Of course. Misto is shown throughout the musical to be awkward, unsure of himself and well. Really, kinda incompetent. Which is Wild cuz in the stage show he might be aloof but he's fairly confident in his powers.

So, Old Deuts gets kidnapped. In the stage show Tugger is the one to bring Misto forward! It's really quite sweet, imo, and I'm showing myself as a Tuggoffelees shipper here, but again Tugger is previously shown to be pretty conceited but then here he is boosting and hyping up Misto to bring Deuteronomy back. My friends and I have lovingly dubbed this the boyfriend hype song.

SOMEHOW. The movie manages to make this, easily, the MOST BORING number in the whole thing. Which, again, WILD. Misto awkwardly stumbles through his whole song, which again is... Boasting of his supreme magical powers which movie Misto clearly. Does not have or believe to have. The song, to me, feels super awkward and unnecessarily drawn out in the movie which sucks cuz it's one of my favourites in the show.

The declawing (heh) of Mr Mistoffelees actually reminds me strongly of how they changed Gaston in the live action Beauty and the Beast movie. He's gone from a beloved figure in the animated movie to someone so disliked in the town that Le Fou has to pay people off to say nice things about him. It's just. Wild character choices were made!!

Skimbleshanks the Railway Cat is probably my favourite in movie non ensemble number. It feels the most... Genuine? Compared to the other nomination songs.

Other problems include but are not limited to:

The inconsistent size scale of the CATS which throws me off constantly.

The weirdly overt sexual overtones added to MANY of the songs (Jenny and Bustopher being the worst)

This is just a personal gripe and opinion but I don't like that they used the UK version of Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer. The American version is both better known and tbh way more fun. Teazer's giggle? Adds ten years to my life every time.

Victoria's added solo song, Beautiful Ghosts, while I like the song as a song it doesn't fit the style of message of the musical. In the movie she's singing directly to Grizzabella who's being an outcast for years that she should be grateful she even has memories of being part of the tribe?? What?? But I know they had to add an original song to be able to be nominated for awards in like the Grammys n shit (which is why all musical movies will have an original song, fun fact!!) kinda funny they went to the effort though considering........... I don't think anyone could have genuinely believed CATS 2019 was gonna win anything but golden rhaspberries.

Movie Mr Mistoffelees has made repeated appearances as my sleep paralysis demon

The various cut characters, shout outs to Jemima, Demeter and Jellylorum especially

Bombalurina being a henchman to Macavity rubs me the wrong way

God I've written... So much. You probably get it by now haha. Like I said at the beginning, I try to go into any adaptation with an open mind but... Let's be honest, this movie wasn't marketed to people who are fans of the musical.

It was marketed, and made, to make money. And they choose to do that through, I think, intentionally making the worst possible version ever. Bad press is still press and the more outrageous people said the movie was the more people wanted to go see exactly what kind of train wreck it was.

Which is a disservice to the stage show, honestly, and all the people who've worked on it over the years.

But what can we do, right?

And besides all that, I do... Still own the movie version and I do still rewatch it on occasion. It is entertaining even if it's in a train wreck kind of way. I usually end up watching the 1998 version, then 2019 and then various tour runs that are on YouTube. (I highly recommend the 2016 tour, it's very good)

So in conclusion. It's fun (?) to watch. I enjoy picking things apart and doing analysis (if you couldn't tell!) so like... I don't hate it?

It did what it set out to do, I guess, and I can't fault it for that but. It's not a fair metre with which to judge the stage show imo. But I know it's not everyone's cup of tea, haha.

Jazz hands. I'm more than happy to elaborate or just chat about CATS if anyone wants! I grew up listening to the Broadway CD since I was a toddler so it's been! A very long standing obsession haha. Probably the only other thing on par with CATS is my obsession with Jurassic Park which I've also been a fan of since I was 3 (but that's a whole story in and of itself)

[border-spam]

Leech Lord - What's your poison?

Troy

Only has two modes when alcohol starts entering his system:

Rare glimpse into his magnetic, genuine self

Troy.exe

It's usually the latter, sadly, and he's learned to spot the telltale signs over the years and stop drinking before they spiral. Going down that pit in private is fine, no one's going to see the spiteful hatred and self aggression he can reach, but he doesn't like other people being around for that. Not followers, and certainly not people he cares about. 

He's ashamed enough of the moments of it that sneak past his defenses - the tantrums in front of worshipers, the violent breakdowns around Saints and High Priests, so he won't let it happen when he has a choice. Troy will just stop drinking at times, regardless of if it's mid public event or only half way through a night of relaxation safe in a friend's home. That shadow passes over him briefly, it's hard to spot and he hides it well, but he puts the can down and shakes the blur out of his head. He tips a shot into someone else’s glass, and he lets the practiced mask slide back on.

The other times are rare but surprising. Sometimes it doesn't happen, sometimes the whispers in the back of his skull don't get louder, sometimes his skin gets warm instead of beginning to crawl, and those are the evenings everyone remembers. Those are the nights when people just.. want to be close to him. Where the laughter comes easy, and he radiates something few can hear, and even less can see. The shrieking sound harmonises, he hums on a silent frequency, shimmers in a halo of light on a spectrum eyes can't catch. 

They say people are drawn to Sirens, but when you ask why, no one ever has a real answer.

If you're there, next to a man who can't quite remember if he's Calypso or DeLeon, who's loosened with whiskey and stammering happily through a story recited through a flawless memory of childhood campfires and sitting in a mother's lap, you'll get it though. It's a feeling.

Tyreen

Ty can't really consume alcohol in general, it's very rare she's able to actually keep it down long enough for anything to happen, but she does like the taste, and that means once in a blue moon.. it hits her.

Whiskey, Vodka, Tequila, anything fire hot and hissing on the swallow is her palate, she can taste it a little! It doesn't matter if it goes down smooth or rough, she's.. expecting it to come back up again anyway, but when it stays in her stomach?

She's Tyreen.

The filth of God Queen Calypso just melts off her shoulders, her eyes relax , her mouth smooths out of its pointed sneer, she smiles. She runs hands through her hair and fluffs it into messy curls as she rolls out belly laughs from where she's sat crossed legged on the floor, bending almost in double as she cackles at Troy's stupid fucking jokes.

The woman radiates warmth. She's a born performer, all eyes lock on her and not out of fear as she climbs on top of one of the great feast tables and squelches through plates of food, not caring how stained her coat is going to be as she lets it drop. 

She commands attention, hundreds in the dining hall rapt and following her every word as she acts out adventures, gives voices to each character, brandishes a dinner knife like a saber as she fights off invisible foes and narrates with booming theatrics the plot of that movie they watched till the file corrupted as kids, the one about the dragon and the princess. The one he can still recite word for word.

He watches her from the massive ornate chair next to her empty one at the head of the tables. Rests his cheek in his left hand and smiles.

Tyreen turns into their father sometimes. The good parts of him, the parts Troy would give anything to see again, and his sister would loathe knowing she resembled.

Seifa

Sei handles booze like a close friend. An intimate close friend. A close friend who makes her... 😏

And that's basically how she reacts. She 😏 in a spiritual way. Alcohol strips her armor away like wet sponge cake - that shit splats onto the floor around her and all you have left is a bourbon soaked bitch who loves you, ok? Loves u. Oh my god 🥺 She lovessu??

She loves everyone who is remotely kind to her. She loves her crews working hard in the Mechanicum overnight and makes sure they know by slurring it out across the fucking broad-speakers that echo through the great hangar at 4AM.

She loves her friends, her real friends that she never had before, has she told them that by the way? That she never had friends before, not proper ones who stuck with her? Well she has now. 3 times in a row.

She loves Tyreen you know, she wishes she was here. It would be great if Ty was here wouldn't it? The real Ty. Do you remember Ty, the real one? She does. Ohhh the stories.... they'd melt your face. She's telling them now - you don't actually have a choice in whether she does or not.

She loves Ven so much, and Eli. And Jacko. Ol' Jacko da blade, c'mere. All of ff yee. She gives loving contact as freely as words, wrapping arms that can barely span any of the men's shoulders around them and practically wrestling them into chokeholds as they laugh and either knowingly try and detangle from her or just accept it for what it is and hug back. She's not going anywhere anyway, where's her other shoe? Ah fuck it it's grand.

She loves Troy, and it doesn't matter if he acts all annoyed cause she’s saying it, ahhaha look everyone he's so embarrassed, ah c'mere you idiot, hold still. She loves him. She hopes he knows how good he could be, underneath. 

She presses her cheek against the ridge of his and wraps half numb arms around mismatched shoulders, tells him in a hushed slur that she'll always be there for him, ok? She's his friend, she'll always be here if he needs her.

He'll wait for her to stop crying before he carefully peels her away from his chest and tries to get her some water. She always cries when it's Troy's turn to deal with her like this. Always, and only with him for some reason. 

It's hard to not notice, and sometime he's worried the other's know something he doesn't.

Asks are open!

[krreader]

something to remember

pairing: jeon jeongguk x reader fandom: bts warnings: / genre: fluff

summary: it was supposed to be a fun weekend trip filled with nice dates and fancy dinners. but jungkook had more in mind and you honestly hadn’t been prepared for it.

a/n: @glorisit​ THANK YOU BB I HOPE YOU ENJOYED YOUR TRIP AND I LOVE YOU TOO!!!!! I just wanted to say that I honestly didn’t know where I was going with this and just kept writing and then I was done and was like… this is.. kinda good? I love when that happens ahhaha. anyways, hope you all like this ♥ (also, I reALLY wanted to use a gif from the GCF video, but since JK never really films himself, this was the best I could do. so imagine this is you and not jimin lol)

ask box | masterlist | fandoms | faq | multifandom reader blog

Up until you were sat on the plane, you hadn’t even noticed that he had been filming you. He had started the second you two left the apartment, all the way to the airport, when checking in..

It was only when you turned your head from the window to face him, that you noticed he was holding his camera to film you.

“What are you doing?” you chuckled.

Even though he had his hoodie on as well as his face mask, you could see it in the way the corners of his eyes wrinkled, that he was grinning happily.

“Filming you.”

“I can see that. But I don’t understand why you’re doing it.”

“Because you’re pretty?”

You gently pushed the camera down, but only so you could press a kiss against his nose through the face mask, “You’re cute, you know that?”

From the way he was giggling like a ten year old, he seemed to have enjoyed that.

The truth was, this trip was so much more than a casual boyfriend/girlfriend weekend trip. This was something he wanted to remember. He obviously would even without the camera, but he wanted to be able to watch it again when he was old and wrinkly and you and him were sitting on the porch of your house with fifteen grandchildren.

He literally filmed everything.

You arriving in Tokyo, arriving at the hotel, having breakfast, lunch, going on a sightseeing tour. If he wasn’t filming you, he was filming the city.

He documented every little thing and every time you so much as smiled, the camera would be on you and he’d capture the moment.

You went from one date to the next, up until that same night when you had dinner, before retreating to your room. It was only then, that he finally turned off the camera for the night.

“So what’s really going on?”

“Huh?” he took off his shirt and crawled into bed with you, immediately raising his arm, so that you could cuddle into his side.

“The whole filming thing.. I doubt you’re going to be able to publish this, or ARMY will go crazy. They’re okay with us now, but if you post this, they’re going to flock me.”

“They won’t flock you..”

“Remember when you accidentally hinted that you and I have had sex before? Remember that debate?”

True that. But what exactly did everyone expect? That he was still a virgin? That he would be till marriage? Like, sure, he could have been and he wouldn’t have minded if you hadn’t been comfortable with it, but you’ve been with each other for more than three years now. It was only natural that it had happened eventually.

“It’s not for ARMY. It’s for myself. And for you.”

“As like a birthday present?” you looked up at him with shining eyes and he instantly down at you.

“I’m not going to tell you, or it won’t be a surprise anymore.”

“Oh, come on. At least give me a hint.”

“Stop this,” he laughed and pressed a kiss against your forehead, “Now sleep. Tomorrow is going to be a long day.”

You hadn’t actually known what he had planned, since he hadn’t given you any details beforehand. But like the day before, it was one date followed by the other, one amazing thing that topped the one before. You honestly hadn’t expected a vacation like this, especially because this was usually only something a guy would do for his girlfriend on her birthday or an anniversary. But it definitely wasn’t either of these things, you had already checked. Twice.

The camera was always on, especially that night before your flight back.

Jeongguk had decided the best way to end this trip was to go to Disney for a couple of hours.

You were first looking around the park for a bit, going on a couple of rides, before having dinner in the Blue Bayou restaurant (which was really romantic, by the way). Again, he did not turn the camera off for a minute, always kept it on you to capture every single moment.

But it was never on him.

Well.. not until the end anyways.

You had just wanted to go to the bathroom before the firework would begin and he took that opportunity to set up the camera, crouching down in front of it and smiling happily.

“I hope you’re still with her when you’re watching this. She’s the best thing that’s ever going to happen to you, understood? Treat her right, for the rest of your life and give her all the love she deserves. Or I will come to the future and kick your ass, Jeon Jeongguk,” he grinned, “But for now.. wish me luck.”

“What are you doing?” you laughed as you came back out, “The firework is about to start, come on..”

“I know, I know..,” he rushed to your side and stopped you from walking away when you wanted to, “We can watch it from here.”

“What.. without the camera? You filmed me having breakfast twice, food staining my clothes, but you don’t want to film this?”

“But that’s just one of the things I love about you,” he wrapped his arms around your middle and you yours around his neck, “I love when you’re eating much, because then I know that you’re okay and healthy. I love the sounds that you make when it tastes good, because then I know that you’re happy. And I love it when you tell me you’re full, because then I don’t have to worry about you.”

“What is this?” you laughed, your eyebrows drawn together in confusion, though.

“It’s just me telling you things that I never really told you or not told you enough, but I should have. You know, like how beautiful you are.”

“Jeongguk,” you giggled, “You’re making me flustered, stop this.”

“I haven’t even started,” he quickly kissed your forehead, before looking back into your eyes, “You know.. I used to think that I wouldn’t meet my soulmate until I was much older and not in this industry anymore. I never thought I’d meet you by coincidentally sitting on the same park bench one day and I couldn’t tie my shoe laces together because my hand had been injured. I remember how I immediately fell in love with your kindness, when I only had to look at you with my pleading eyes and you instantly tied them back together. I remember how I fell in love with your eyes when they lit up as you smiled. You know how they always say you meet the love of your life when you least expect it.. and that’s really the truth. The more days you and I spend together, the more I realize that I don’t want to spend the rest of my life without you. And even when we have little fights or arguments, I still never, not once, want you to get out of my life. Because no matter how much my future might change, there’s always one fixed point. And that’s you, (Y/N).”

The more he spoke, the more you began to tear up.

Jeongguk wasn’t necessarily someone that never talked about his emotions or feelings, but never in that sense. Never so deeply. You were truly touched by his words, but even when he was saying all of this, you didn’t think, not even for a second, that he would do what he did next.

“I know we’re young.. and many others are going to think that I’m crazy for doing this. But I honestly do not have a single doubt about it. I know that this is what I want and I want it to last forever.. so..”

“Oh my god,” you breathed out as he pulled out the ring box and got down on one knee with a smug grin.

You didn’t know if he was confident, but he sure as hell loved that he was able to surprise you like this, because you really hadn’t expected this tonight.

“I don’t want you to be my girlfriend anymore, (Y/N). I want you to be my wife. I want to call you mine forever.. so..,” he opened up the ring box, a shiny engagement ring staring at you, “Will you marry me?”

Three years you have been with him. Three years, were you cherished him each and every day as much as he cherished you. And like he had said, there was not one single day, that you wanted your future to be without him. Yes, there were obviously arguments and fights, but they were normal and the important thing was that even during that time, nothing changed.

You loved him, more than anything in the world.

And you wanted to spend the rest of your life with him.. you just never thought he would be as serious about this as to asking you to marry him at this age.

But you could see it in his eyes. The sincerity, the earnestness and the love he held for you. This wasn’t just a mood, something that would pass in a couple of weeks and then he’d regret it.

No, he was dead serious about this.

And fortunately for him, so were you.

“I do,” you finally answered and as cocky as he had been, the second the question was out in the open, he had held his breath, now finally able to let it out with a big grin.

“You do?”

“I do,” you repeated and leaned down to kiss him happily, the first tears rolling out of your eyes.

Jeongguk slowly got up from the ground, only stopping the kiss so that he could put the ring on your finger, before he wrapped his arms around you like before and pulling you against him like he’d never let you go again.

“There’s one more thing,” he said after a while of kissing/you crying (it was just really wet and you didn’t know whether that was the kiss or the tears, but probably the latter).

“I don’t know how much I can handle, to be honest,” you laughed, while you tried to dry off your face with your sleeve.

He pressed one last kiss against your nose, before letting go of you, only to wrap his arms around you from behind when the fireworks began.

At first there were a couple of normal ones, big ones, that reflected in your eyes like stars.

And then there was one that had you gasp, laughing a couple of seconds later. Because there, in the sky, midst all of the random colorful fireworks, it said: “She said yes!”

“Glad you didn’t say no, or this would have been awkward,” he chuckled, as he kissed a spot behind your ear.

How could you have ever said no, when he truly was the love of your life? Age didn’t matter if you were as sure as you two were.. this was the right thing to do, without a doubt.

And while you were amazed by the fireworks, Jeongguk turned around to the camera and winked, giving a big thumbs up.

That would be a good way to end the video.

[hap-hazard]

study tips for a procrastinating mess

as a self-admitted chronic procrastinator, i have decided to post ALL my stupid tricks that help me! hopefully i can internalize them through text *insert heavenly sound here* (chronic procrastinator as in I, esther the idiot, literally stayed up till 4:30 am writing a position paper that i got stuck on and sat in front of for an entire 14 hours. straight. i need help.)

drink with a straw. saw this somewhere, it helps, basically if i have like a cup of water or something i need to constantly pick it up and put it down and it just stops my hands from moving and my mind from thinking aiya. BUT you know I constantly need something to do with myself or i find something to do (aka tumblr and boredpanda) which is why i study snack like a grazing animal omg and also why my hair is always messed up after sitting down in the library for an hour ugh. SO: straws ftw.

similarly, tie hair up. if my hair is down. i will play with it. and that means i WON’T be typing. it must. be. up.

don’t die studying for assessments! briefly review with vocab! this may just be me but really when it comes to tests and quizzes it’s usually not what i studied independently that counts, it’s what i fully learned in the first place. so listen like a really attentive 5 year old in class (cuz that’s basically what you are in relation to a knowledgeable teacher) and then before a test just review vocabulary and dates so you can make sure you’re able to revive that dead information in your brain from 5 days ago. i use vocabulary sheets as knowledge defibrillators. 

throw your phone across the room! this is probably why my screen protector has so many cracks. but yeah i leave it across the room or in another room where i can’t see the screen.. if i don’t see it it’s usually out of sight out of mind. oh and if i need to use my phone i don’t check any other notifications because if i read a text i always feel obligated to reply so just leave that gross red notification hanging there for a while.

things to do after hitting the wall/when feeling really stuck in a rut: shower. do chores. walk the dog or run errands to get out of the house (but not longer than half an hour). refill water and stretch while doing it. play guitar but limit it to 20 min. check in on a family member and ask hyd. braid hair or retie it. stand up and scream a little. dance around the house and sing. give yourself a pep talk about all the stuff you have to do in order. sit somewhere new even if it’s in the same room and DECIDE it is now a new beginning because you shifted two seats to the left.

music is to block out sound, not to entertain. my house is almost always noisy; dad on the phone, mom talking to my brother, sister practicing traditional chinese instruments, brother singing along to the entire freaking hamilton soundtrack, dog barking, grandpa snoring... earbuds are savior. at cafes too. people say to only listen to instrumental and i tend to agree, but sometimes listening to my usual chillhop playlist just makes me sad and unmotivated so i alternate between a few playlists just to switch it up and keep ME AWAKE. heck i even listen to white noise, anything to drown out distracting interactions

ALSO earbuds are good even if there’s no one else around because they prevent you from getting up to do random stuff (cordsssssss hallelujah for annoying cords). ESPECIALLY keeping you away from mindlessly checking your phone.

get out. really just leave the house or wherever you normally study. i go to a different cafe every time i need to hardcore study just because being in my house makes me feel relaxed. if i pay for a starbucks coffee, i am NOT going home until i use that starbucks time well and do something productive. also this gives me a conscious reminder of my time because i have to go home at a certain time etc. etc.

when in midst of a break-down, tell someone. not in the “oh no you’re going to hurt someone or hurt yourself” sense, but because it helps you finish that break-down up and feel re-motivated. crying to my mom about an assignment may or may not help with the assignment, but at least i cried and now i don’t need to agonize for another hour over the stress. text-spamming a friend may be stupid in retrospect but as long as you go “HEY I’M DYING LISTEN TO MY STUPID LIFE CHOICES FOR 5 MIN” and then get right back to work it will help you move past the stress and get back in a grind.

for exams, just make a list of things to know better then attend after school hours. at our school the teachers have after school hours or free periods and they are *usually* very happy to engage with a student and answer questions regarding material during this time. for finals, i usually don’t try to cram everything. i look over all my notes and vocab and just make a super basic list of things i dont know well (or highlight the terms in my notes). making an entire comprehensive study guide of these things takes too long. then i go to the teacher and talk it all out. just make sure i understand and then while talking scribble down a couple words so i can remember. after doing this sometime during the week before the final exam i can HANDLE ITTTT and i don’t need to cram quite as much. (this probably works because i’m an auditory learner.)

BONUS TIPS FOR STUDYING LATE AT NIGHT! all-nighters are scary; try to get at least a couple hrs of sleep or your days will all seem like one and you’ll lose your sense of time and school and classes. food gives energy. hot drinks keep you awake. if you are tired you will feel colder (idk why but everything is always colder if i’m underslept). DO NOT expect a comfortable aesthetic night; if you get any blankets more than necessary you will fall asleep.

there’s probably more but i really don’t remember it ahhaha i’ll add it later if i think of it. and i know there are so many good things that i don’t do while studying like making a schedule etc etc etc... it’s just they don’t always work for me, these are my fail-safes haha.

also here are my spotify playlists (either that i made or that i listen to):

for when i am SAD:

the songs that make me happy

Reggae Infusions

String Theory

for when i must BLOCK OUT NOISE and get in that study mood you know:

new chill

Jazz Vibes

heiwifjejdj

Ocean Escapes

for when i am TIRED:

electro swing

qoidnsdv

*when i'm tired i also listen to my normal music and sing along a little