Tumgik
#all i had today was apple juice and gummy bears
inkyquince · 3 years
Note
ayup! so lately i have been thinking ab giving the LIs the remote to a vibe inside the PC so I am here to beg for crumbs plz \(u.u)/
my guy you gotta know that's a bad idea. look at your line up. This isn't gonna be a hot steamy piece like you're gonna get for like, the AOT guys or sumn.
content warning. Kylar being a creep, exhibitionism kinda, voyeurism, rough sex, implied dubcon/noncon.
You're gonna get a couple of hot bitches and the rest deserve the death penalty.
For example, Robin? Low confidence means they're gonna be sitting there, sweating their little sweat and SHAKING. Fully won't do it. Maybe turns it on once and quickly turns it off. It's like when the nerd couldn't even sip the tiddy milk. High confidence is more fun, but nothing will happen at school. You ever tried to masturbate next to high confidence Robin? AT LEAST KYLAR AND WHITNEY APPRECIATE THE SHOW, let me touch me peepee >:(((( (Doesn't help that im tryna seduce Winter while im doing it and Robin WON'T LET ME FUCKING-) Best you're gonna get is that you're going to absolutely suck ass when you two play on his console and they turn it way up when you're just about to beat them. Or during the movies. Maybe on a slow day at the stand.
Look, we all know Whitney is hot. Mean asshole, weird obsession with parasites, prime step-parent you hate material, the world's worst ex and partner. Yes I have a soft spot for @angrelysimpping's House Husband Whitney, yes, I love the thought of ex husband Whitney who is the worst, we exist... Where was I going with this?
Anyway, why would you do this. Whitney has one mode and they're also just gonna use one mode with the vibrator. Full speed, fastest mode, it's gonna be jumping around inside of you, its so likely that it'll run out of batteries before the day is out. Worst is when they get a lightbulb over their head on a friday morning and will have it on low during the first half of the lesson and then on fullspeed during the exam.
"What's that fucking buzzing noise?"
Whitney wants the attention on ya, they're gonna be the reverse version of that one asshole kid who reminds the teacher they had homework, except they're gonna be bugging River that they swear they can hear something. River gonna fucking think its your phone and demand you hand it over. When you explain you can't fucking afford a goddamn phone, you have rent due, you better hope that River just thinks Whitney is disrupting the exam instead of even thinking of a vibrator up you. Why? Because they will faint again and they're gonna come down and bust they head. Good work. You killed your FUCKING teacher.
Look, Eden's hot. Eden is also proud. More like your annoyed grandpa with technology. Will put on some half spectacles and squint at your phone when you're showing them a funny video. No, Eden, I don't know this person in the video, just watch the tiktok! Huge technophobe, which is neat cuz if you ever make them in the Sims 3, you can finally use that fucking trait.
Anyway, what are you tryna achieve? Yes, they like looking at you when half naked. No, they hate you getting pleasure from something other than them. Ever tried to masturbate in the spring? They're on that real quick. Smacking your hands away and all. Unless they're the one gripping the dildo that's obliterating your hole, or stuffing ya with anal beads, they're not gonna have fun with this. Unless you've been bad. Cuz then it's a punishment.
Oh, its before the stockholm syndrome era? Every time you fight that hunter, you gotta make a gamble that they haven't heard of sex toys yet. Gonna stuff you with the vibrator and leave you on the leash while doing their shit. Gonna have it on so hard that you're gonna go numb at some point.
After you think they're just lonely <3 it's... Better? You stayed away too long? Well, they're more in love and they just missed ya really. Also their property should stay on their fucking land. Go away too long and they're gonna stuff a vibrator in ya and spank ya and then go hunting with you still on the floor, buzzin away.
Also no, they won't take you with hunting with that inside of you. The deers will hear the buzzing and run away and you'll both be hungry.
Kylar is Kylar. Greasy little rat who asks for feet pics at 3 am, but you're asleep so they break in to take feet pics themselves. Won't even leave money in exchange. Also, sidenote, would pay for your onlyfans.
Anyway, they would almost drop the fucking remote when you give it to them. Dumbass. Probably says some whack shit like "I want to be the vibrator inside of you <3" and now you're thinking he either likes micro/macro or they're gonna break in and paint your vibrator to look like them and you're gonna get acrylic paint poisoning and you're going to explain that this all came from a terrible idea to your goddamn doctor. You want to be bending over for Harper while they stare at a rash that developed from chemical burns? No, didn't think so.
Worst of all, they're going to be a jealous little cunt and turn it way up when you sit with others. It's a reminder of them inside of you so you could be hanging out with Robin or Sydney and then the vibrator sparks to life and makes this the worst lunchtime in the world. It's their way of reminding you that you gave them the remote, that they're watching you.
And it's kinda cute. Until it buzzes to life while you're entertaining someone else in your room. They're watching you after all.
Avery? Babe, Avery has got you covered.
Like, they're not gonna use the vibrator when angry, so while its buzzing away, you know ya safe. When Avery's angry, they're punishing you and it's not a fun, teehee, punishment. They're gonna march you up to your goddamn science teacher and buy whips and flogs and take you back to the hotel and fuck ya up for making them so angry.
Anyway, the vibrator is gonna be switching between all modes at dinner, in the hot tub, on bed sheets, in the car, but not at the party. They're tryna win the goddamn dancing competition and loosing because you stumble over your feet with the vibrator buzz-buzz-buzzing away inside of you would be kinda funny but Avery likes their image too much.
Avery does love the vibrator. Really proves that you're theirs mind and body to play with and you giving the remote to them so readily puts them in a fabulous mood. They own you and they get to prove it with the vibrator.
Alex is busy, so ngl, they might forget about it. You'll be all teehee, they're playing the long game, and the farmer is legit wrestling a pig to stop it from eating their damn shorts.
But it's great payback when you usher him out of the shower when they walk in on you and you give a lil show but won't let them wash you. Also excellent when you give them head while they're on the phone.
Alex mainly gonna abuse that toy when making/eating breakfast with you, when you make them a cup of tea and when watching TV and snuggling. While also suddenly remember it when you're lounging under the tree and just !!! and turn it way up. What an asshole. Does make sure it's off when Remy is around. What a sweetheart.
Sydney, my beloved.
Pure Sydney aint touching that fucking thing. What did you expect. You'd give them the remote and they'd scream and throw it and faint and give it to Jordan to destroy in the fire. Sirris will tell them off, I have to give them a refund for their toy now! But Sydney will have no qualms and snuggle into bed with a clear conscious.
Corrupt Sydney? Fuck yeah. When you're giving them head under the desk in the library, when Leighton spanks you when you share the stolen book punishment with them, praying at the temple, its going to be buzzing away inside of you. Sydney will also be genuinely happy that you did this that they will randomly drop a kissy onto your lips. Asshole will also working their shift at the sex shop and brag to customers that "Yes, this model is very good, it's been inside my beloved the entire day and has yet to run out of batteries!". What a salesperson.
386 notes · View notes
cgmaddie · 4 years
Text
The Play Date (part 1)
nsfw warning: ddlg, piss kink
Tumblr media
"Rise and shine, princess," Maddie says as she nudges Kate, who is only half awake. She rubs her eyes and gives a sleepy yawn. "Come on, let's get dressed."
Maddie giggles at her sleepy baby. "No, baby. You have someone coming over today, remember?" Kate gasps as she remembers her sibby, Cariyana, is coming over for a play date this afternoon. "Now, mama picked you out a outfit  for today so let's get dressed." This time, Kate doesn't argue as she's already out of bed and excited to see her friend. Maddie takes off Kate's pajamas and puts a pink dress over her small frame. Then, she slips her blonde hair into cute little pigtails that reach her shoulders. "All done, baby. You look so pretty," Maddie says as she admires Kate in her dress.
"Hehe, thank you mama," Kate smiles as she kisses her mama on the cheek. "When will Cariyana be here?"
"Soon, baby. I've already made you breakfast so why don't you go eat while mama gets ready."
"Mkay!" Kate rushes down the stairs into the kitchen where a plate of bacon, eggs, and pancakes waits for her. She takes a bite of pancake and let's out a satisfied sigh. "Yummy," she says as she takes a drink of orange juice. Just then, she hears a ring at the door. Kate gasps and shoves the rest of her food down her mouth then rushes to the door.
"Mommy, mommy! She's here!" Kate squeals as she opens the door for her sibby. Cariyana is there and immediately opens her arms for a big hug. Kate is so excited she practically picks up Cariyana as she hugs back, which isn't hard to do as Cariyana is no bigger than 4 feet.
"Alright, little ones," Maddie says walking down the stairs. "I'm gonna run some errands so be good. That means no messes and don't eat too many sweets," she jokes as she kisses them both on the forehead. Maddie tucks a peice of long brown hair behind her ear and grabs her purse. "Call me if you need anything." She hugs her babies and heads out the door.
Kate and Cariyana wait until they hear Maddies car start up and leave the drive way, and then they both give each other a big, mischievous smile. "You thinking what I'm thinking?" Kate smirked.
"Candy?" Cariyana agrees, and then the two run to the kitchen where they find the candy drawer. "Wow, look at all this! I don't know where to start," Cariyana says as she rummages through the sweets.
"I do," says Kate as she tears through the wrapping on a chocolate bar. She takes a bite and savors it in her mouth. "Wanna bite, sissy?"
"Yes, please." They eat the chocolate bar and then move onto the rest of the candy; skittles, marshmallows, lollipops, gummy bears, twizzlers, they ate until their tummies started to ache. "Ow... my belly hurts," Cariyana whines as she finishes her fifth candy bar.
"Mine too, that was so fun!" Kate giggles. She gives her sissy's belly a small kiss. "What should we do now?"
"Hmm." Cariyana scratches her chin. "How about doctor? Or maybe house? Oh, or we could play dress up! We can color!"
"Hehe, sissy you're so funny," Kate laughs as Cariyana rants exitedly. "Let's play doctor first!" They get all of their stuffies and take turns taking each other's temperatures. First, Kate gives Cariyana a pretend shot and then puts a bandaid on her booboo. Then, Cariyana listens to Kate's heart with a toy stethoscope and takes notes on her clipboard.
They play for a couple of hours and then they go get a snack. "I made you a samach, sissy," Cariyana says happily as she gives Kate her plate.
"Thank you. Here's your juice." Kate puts a glass of apple juice on the table next to their plates. "Remember drink it slow so you don't get any accidents."
"Alrighhht," Cariyana groans. Maddie always gets onto Cariyana for having accidents at the table. "I can be a big girl, okay?" She takes a bite of her sandwich and takes a drink to wash it down. Her and Kate talk about what they're gonna play next as they eat their snack. Cariyana feels herself starting to squirm around in her seat, but ignores it takes another big drink.
They finish eating and Kate gets out her coloring books and shares her crayons with Cariyana. Cariyana feels her body becoming tingly as she colors with Kate. She squeezes her legs together as she feels herself starting to dribble. Uh-oh she thinks. "Um, sissy?" she says nervously.
"Yeah, Cari? Do you need the red crayon back?" Kate asks innocently, not yet noticing that cariyana shorts are starting to get wet.
"No, I-I." Cariyana bites her lip as she struggles to talk. She blushes because she's so embarrassed she is having another accident after she said she was a big girl. But before she has too long to think about it, she feels another dribble and snaps back. "I don't think I can make it to the bathroom in time..."
Kate looks puzzled. Then, cariyana opens her legs a bit to show her the wet spot forming. "Oh," she gasps.
"Please help me, sissy. Quick!" Cariyana begs. Kate gives her an understanding nod and helps her take off her pants before she can dribble anymore. Kate places herself at the bottom of Cariyana's chair and in between her legs. She places her mouth over Cariyana's private parts and gives her a look to let her know she's ready.
Without waiting a single second, Cariyana starts pissing in her sibbies mouth. She grabs Kate's head and presses it closer to her to make sure she doesn't spill any of her pee. "Ahh," she sighs in pleasure as she releases all of her fluids. Kate gulps them up as quick as she can, but Cariyana is pissing so fast into her mouth. The warm piss shoots down Kate's throat and she moans as she swallow it all. She gives a muffled enthusiastic moan as it warms her stomach. Cariyana pees until her bladder is completely empty.
Kate gasps for breath as she swallows the last of her pee. She licks her lips to taste the rest of her sisters sweet piss. "That was so good sissy."
Cariyana strokes her hair and wipes the corner of her mouth. "Why don't you clean me up then?" she whimpered.
Kate smiles up at her. "Alright, sissy!" She looks down at Cariyana's princess parts and gives a slow, teasing lick. "That feel good, sissy?" Cariyana tries to say yes but is too flustered to get a word out. "I'll take that as a yes," Kate adds and starts licking again. Cariyana spreads her legs to allow her sis to go harder. Kate spits on her clit and uses her tongue to spread it around. Cariyana begins to whimper as Kate works her tongue around her private parts.
"Oh yeah," she moans. "I'm so close..." She feels the warmth of release building in her stomach. Kate speeds up as she gets closer. "Kate, I'm about to–"
Just as she feels her orgasm building up, the door clicks open. Kate jerks up and sees Maddie standing in the doorway. Maddie looks up and down at the two of them, noticing Cariyana's pants pulled down and Kate between her legs with drool going down her chin. "Well what do we have here," Maddie growls as she unbuttons her blouse.
"Mom-mommy," Cariyana whimpers. "I had another accident."
"Another accident hm? Let me guess you drank your juice too fast?" She taunts as she walks closer. Cariyana nods nervously. "Well, I guess I'll just have to punish you."
12 notes · View notes
angst-king · 3 years
Text
Yucky feels
((this is for my favorite side ship. Kiribakuraka, and their son Zomi...I’m not very good at sickfics sorry)) It was supposed to be a nice papa and son day for Kirishima and Zomi, but...well, that quickly turned out not to be the case when Kirishima woke up feeling sick. He woke up feeling stuffy, tired, and achy. At first he thought he was just tired from yesterday’s hero work but that was until he started coughing. Darn it, did he really just get sick the day he and Zomi were supposed to hang out for the day?!! Seems so, well now he was gonna have to break the bad news to Zomi. He sluggishly gets out of bed and walks to his four year old’s room and knocks on the door before softly saying “Hey Zomi, I’m coming in.” Opening the door, Kirishima was a little confused seeing the toddler was still asleep. Usually Zomi was awake by now but he was still deep asleep under his covers. Kirishima decided to gently shake the small one awake. 
“Zozo, come on buddy, wake up.” Leaning away as talking made him cough, Kirishima tried to wake up the kid. Earning some whining and whimpering. Zomi pushes his papa’s hand away wanting to go back to sleep. Zomi wasn’t exactly a morning person, yet still didn’t sleep in very long. “Come on Zom, gotta wake up for me.” Zomi whined more before coughing, his cough sounded just as bad and Kirishima’s which made Kirishima worry. Maybe he just did this in the morning? Eijirou didn’t usually wake Zomi up during the day, he usually woke up on his own. 
Big red eyes slowly opening up looking tired and wanting more sleep, Zomi looked at Eijirou and whined. “Hhhnng? T-time to get up?” His voice sounded a little raspy and more exhausted, and Zomi’s face was really starting to look flushed. “Yup it is, hey I’m sorry kiddo but, I don’t know if we can go out today.” Zomi looked at Eijirou confusedly, furrowing his brows. “Why not?-” Zomi’s talking was interrupted by his own painful sounding coughing fit. Hearing the little boy cough Eijirou had a bad feeling, he’d never seen a toddler sick before but. He knew the other didn’t exactly look like his normal self. “Well Zom, I'm not feeling so good today, and I don’t think going out is gonna make me feel any better.” Frowning Zomi pouted a little but nodded, sniffling wetly at his runny nose, he scrunched it up before letting out a soft “Hutt’zziiew!” Strangely enough this sneeze seemed to actually make the ground shake!
Eijirou was rather surprised by this, and Zomi looked the same way. “Wh-what was that?” Zomi asked while wiping his runny nose on the sleeve of his shirt. Eijirou gave a small frown and sat on Zomi’s bed. “Let me check something first kiddo” Eijirou reached out and placed his palm on Zomi’s forehead before quickly pulling a way. “Yikes, I think someone’s not feeling so good either.” Zomi whimpered and held onto his stuffed bear that he slept with tightly. “I feel really yucky Papa.” Hearing his son say that actually made Eijirou’s heart break, seeing his cheeks all pink and pale, eyes looking glassy and tired, and his voice sounding all raspy. “Naw sounds like it lil dude, can you tell me what feels yucky?” “My froat is all scratchy, I can’s breathe through my nose, a-and I’s really cold.” “Alright buddy, I’m sorry you feel yucky, sounds like you and I both had a bit of a cold, don’t worry, Papa’s gonna help you feel better. We can still spend our day together...just not exactly how we planned it.” Zomi nods and then he buries his face into his teddy bear before asking. “Can’s we cuddle Papa?” Eijirou smiles and picks Zomi up and gets up from Zomi’s bed. “Sure thing lil guy, how about we go on the couch, I’ll get up some sickie supplies?” Zomi holds onto Kirishima’s shirt with one hand and his teddy bear with the other. “O-okay” 
With that Eijirou carried his four year old down to the living room and set him on the couch. “Okay you and Sunny can stay here and pick out what you wanna watch on TV, I’ll get us some supplies okay.” Sunny was Zomi’s teddy bear which he loved to death, and never went anywhere without it. It was a gift from Kaminari, he’s had it since he was only 1. The toddler wiped his nose on the stuffed animal as his nose began to run. Eijirou soon returned with some supplies.”Alright, I’ve got supplies.” Eijirou said as he walked into the living room with a small basket full of stuff. He had a few blankets, two boxes of tissues, some medicine, a thermometer, pillows from their rooms, and his phone. Setting down the basket on the coffee table in front of the couch, Eijirou grabbed the blankets and distributed them. Zomi took his own blanket that Eijirou had gotten for him and curled up on the couch. Sitting on the couch, Zomi crawled into Eijirou’s lap and nuzzled against him. “Hey there buddy” “wanna lay on Papa” Zomi quietly says leaning into Eijirou’s chest, at first Eijirou didn’t know what his son meant. Now he knows. Zomi was gonna lay on Eijirou’s chest like a pillow. Zomi wasn’t usually a clingy kid, but it seemed that when he was sick he was a bit touch starved and cuddly. Eijirou didn’t mind this at all, he brushed his fingers through the boy’s hair while he grabbed the thermometer. 
He grabbed both thermometers, the ear thermometer and the oral one. He used the oral one on himself and kept it under his tongue, while keeping the little boy snuggled up to him. Sniffling and muffling coughs until the tool beeped, luckily Eijirou didn’t have much of a fever, so that was good. Now it was Zomi’s turn, so he gently pats Zomi on the shoulder. “Zomi, think you can keep this under your tongue for me?” Zomi looked at the tool confusedly and with a tired look on his face. “Hmm?” His brain was all foggy and having a hard time registering things. He really wasn’t doing too well with this cold. So Eijirou just decided to use the ear thermometer. “Never mind buddy, just hold still for me.” He says before sticking the ear thermometer into Zomi’s ear. Squirming a little bit at this, Zomi whined and tried to bury his face deeper into Eijirou’s chest but he couldn’t go very far.
When the thermometer beeped like the other one, Eijirou frowned. “38.5 C” (101F) “Is that bad?”  Asked Zomi, Eijirou didn’t want to worry his son but also didn’t want to lie to him either. 38.5 is not a high fever so it’s not bad, but it’s not good that he has one in the first place. “Well it’s not a high fever but, it's not good that you have one in general. Though it shouldn’t take too long to get you back to normal.” Zomi nods and wipes his nose onto Sunny again as his nose is becoming very runny and then “Hutt’zziiew! Hutt’zziiew!” he sneezed right into Sunny. Making Eijirou cringe, he grabbed a tissue and sat Zomi up. “Don’t do that to your teddy bear buddy, you’ll get him sick.” “oh sowwy” “it's okay kiddo, here, blow your nose.” Pressing the tissue to Zomi’s nose, Zomi blew his nose into the tissues, earning soft spoken praises from Eijirou. “Good job buddy, good.” Eijirou tosses the used tissues into the empty basket, deciding to use that as the waste basket for the time being. “Alright, Zozo, this is gonna taste icky but I need you to take some medicine. It’s gonna help you feel better.” The father said, opening the child-proof cap.” Pouring the medicine into the little cup, it kind of looked like juice to Zomi. “Ready? It’s cherry flavored.” Kirishima asked. Thinking it would taste like delicious cherry juice, Zomi nodded. His father handed him the little cup, and he began drinking the medicine. Halfway through the cup, Zomi realized it didn’t taste like juice at all! He realized grass tasted better. “Nono! Yucky! Yucky!” Zomi threw the cup on the floor and it spilled onto the carpet. “I know it isn’t the best taste ever-” Kirishima soon had an idea. He picked up the cup and filled it halfway. “If you drink the rest, I’ll give you some candy, deal?” Zomi skeptically nodded, taking the cup. He hesitated before drinking the medicine. “Great job, Zozo!” Kirishima said to his son. “Cany?” Zomi expected a reward. “This is a new kind of candy.” The father handed Zomi a gummy vitamin. Putting the vitamin in his mouth, he wanted more. “Mowe!” Zomi demanded. “Maybe another time, pal. Maybe some orange juice instead?” Eijirou offered. Zomi thought about it before nodding, he liked juice, unknown to him Eijirou offered orange juice because he knows that will help Zomi get better. “Okay then, come on, let's go get juice.” Eijirou says, so Zomi gets off of Eijirou and wraps the blanket around himself and Sunny while the red head man stood up. 
Leading Zomi into the kitchen, Eijirou grabs two cups, a mug for himself and a sippy cup for Zomi. While Eijirou was looking in the fridge for the orange juice another. “Hut’Ziiew!” came and then the ground shook, Eijirou had a feeling that this was Zomi’s quirk just acting  up when he sneezed. It was normal for little kids to have little to no control over their quirk and while sick it went even more haywire. Eijirou had to make sure nothing fell out of the fridge. “Yikes, bless you, Zomi.” Zomi looked at Eijirou confusedly but Eijirou was turned around so he didn’t see his facial expression. Setting the orange juice down he pours it into their cups, screws on the lid to Zomi’s sippy cup. “Here ya go buddy” Kirishima hands Zomi his cup which he takes and starts drinking on the orange drink, his facial expression changed not long after. It looks like he just discovered what a lemon was. “Nuh-uh, spicy.” Zomi complains, sticking out his tongue. Kirishima chuckles a little at this “I know bud...hmmm.” Kirishima had an idea, he took Zomi’s cup, poured out the orange juice, and replaced it with apple juice and then he went and got the little fruit cup of oranges. “Alright kiddo, how about a fruit cup of oranges with some apple juice?” Zomi smiles widely, he likes fruit cups, they always taste good. “Yeah yeah fwuit cup!” Talking loudly made Zomi cough, which in then made the four year old whimper at the pain in his throat. “Owie” Grabs a small plastic spork, and says. “Okay buddy let's go back to the couch” Nodding Zomi and Eijirou headed back to the living room and got to the couch.
Back on the couch Zomi was given his fruit cup and sippy cup of juice while watching cartoons. It was a good distraction for him and even Eijirou who didn’t mind watching cartoons with the kid. Even if they couldn’t spend their day out of the house and at the playground or toy store, this was fine. Eijirou kept Zomi in his lap for the time being, wrapped up in blankets.
Then his phone rang, grabbing it from the coffee table, Eijirou smiled. “Hey Zomi, mommy’s calling.” Zomi quickly looked over at the phone and Eijirou accepted the video call. Seeing Ochako on the screen, his sickly dull red eyes light up with joy! “Mommy!” Ochako smiles and waves. “Hi baby boy, hi Eiji, what are you two up to?” Zomi then answered “Mommy I’s and daddy feel yucky, so we’s at home.” Ochako frowns hearing that her son and husband are both sick, seeing as they’d been excited about spending the day together. “Naaw I’m sorry you both feel yucky sweetheart, I bet Papa is taking good care of you though.” Zomi nods proudly and raises his fruit cup and sippy cup in the air. “Papa gives me juice and fwuit cup” “That’s good sweetie, you two gonna watch a movie or any cartoons?” “Mhm, we’s watching ‘Ready, jet, go!” Zomi responded happily.
Right after he said that, his voice faltered, and Eijirou knew what was about to happen, so he snatched up a tissue with his free hand and pressed it to Zomi’s nose catching the sneeze just in time. “Het’zziiew! Het’zziiew! Het’ziiew!” Those three sneezes really rocked the house, it could be seen through the camera and felt by Eijirou. “Jeez bless you Zomi” Eijirou said while Zomi blew his nose. “Oh wowie, bless you Zozo. You must be sick, your quirk is acting up, poor baby.” Coos Ochako from her side of the phone, Eijirou nods. “Yeah poor kid’s really not feeling so good, he’s a little touch starved and slept in longer than usual this morning, I had to wake him up.” He replied with a bit of a chesty sounding cough while throwing away the tissues into the basket. Dark brown eyes softening with sympathy, Ochako sighed. “How about I go get some stuff and I’ll make chicken noodle soup for dinner. That’ll definitely help with your yucky cold.” Eijirou smiles “thanks babe, stay safe out there okay, tell Katsuki we said ‘we love you.’” “Will do babe, I love you Eiji, I love you Zomi.” “I wuv you mommy” Just before hanging up, Ochako turns around after hearing some yelling and alarms, seeing a villain behind her she huffed. “Gotta go boys, I’ll be home soon hopefully.” She says before hanging up.
When the call had ended Zomi had finished his snack and set his stuff down on the coffee table before yawning. Rubbing his eyes sleepily, Eijirou could tell the toddler was ready for a nap. He really needed it anyway seeing as he was sick and needed as much rest as he could get. “Sounds like someone’s getting sleepy.” Zomi shook his head but contradicted himself by curling up in his dad’s lap, and laying down, closing his eyes. Eijirou sets his phone down and starts to rub Zomi’s back soothingly to lull the little boy to sleep. Eyelids got heavier by the second until it got to the point where soft little snores could be heard. Eijirou was just as tired, and knew this might be his only chance to get some well needed rest, so he took this chance with advantage and laid down comfortably and adjusted Zomi so they could both sleep well. Turning down the tv volume, he closes his eyes and allows himself to sleep.It wasn’t quite the kind of day they planned out, but it was one they enjoyed.
By the time Ochako and Katsuki had gotten home Zomi and Eijirou were still asleep on the couch. Zomi curled up snuggly under Eijirou while still holding onto Sunny. It was so cute seeing the two asleep together, sure they were sick but it was still adorable nonetheless. Ochako always thought Eijirou was cute when he was sick, especially since his reddish pink nose almost matched his hair color. Zomi was just as cute, even Katsuki thought so. The two made sure not to wake the sleeping boys up, as they snuck off to change out of their hero costumes and went into the kitchen to make them some soup.  
Waking up, Kirishima’s sense of smell had been dulled by congestion but he could totally smell the fact that someone was cooking.  Zomi groaned softly and sat up to stretch. “Hmmmm?” HIs throat still sounded scratchy and he still felt stuffy and lacked energy. Eijirou felt the same though he playfully ruffled Zomi’s messy hair. “I think Mommy and daddy are cooking” Eijirou muttered softly, Zomi made an interesting sound as Eijirou moved and shifted the other off of him. Zomi began to whine, which Eijirou quieted by picking him up. They both stayed wrapped in a blanket of their own and Eijirou brought Zomi and himself into the kitchen. Seeing his husband and wife both sitting at the kitchen island while the soup cooked he smiles. So did Zomi who coughed which alerted the parents that someone else was in the room. 
Looking up from their phones they smile seeing the two sickies at the threshold of the kitchen. “Hey there you two, how ya feeling?” Asked Katsuki, Eijirou turned away from Zomi and coughed into his elbow before answering. “Not so good babe, this cold is kicking my butt.” Zomi leaned into Eijirou’s shoulder and pouted at them. “Feel really icky, daddy.” “Aaw I’m sorry you feel icky Zozo” Katsuki says as he gets up and goes over to them. Zomi tiredly looks at Katsuki who reaches to feel Zomi’s forehead. “You’re a little warm lil guy” Then Ochako joins the conversation as she gets up to turn the stove off. “Some chicken noodle soup will surely make you feel better quicker.” Eijirou smiles at the mention of chicken noodle soup and gives Zomi to Katsuki. “Here Zomi, go with Daddy, Papa is gonna get some soup okay.” Zomi whimpered and whines as he’s being pulled off of Eijirou but doesn’t mind being held by Katsuki at all who takes him to the table. 
Zomi is sitting in Katsuki’s lap, with a bowl of soup in front of him. He’s still too tired to do much on his own so Katsuki says. “Hey kiddo, want some help?” Katsuki was a little surprised by the  small ‘yes’ that Zomi let out but helped him eat his soup. The first spoonful, Zomi looked like he’d entered heaven. “Mmmm yummy” Katsuki and Ochako smiled. “That's good” “that’ll definitely get rid of your icky cold faster.” Katsuki says softly playing with Zomi’s hair, Ochako came around to Eijirou and kissed his forehead. “Oh yeah, and you’ll be better in no time.”
1 note · View note
hawkbucks · 4 years
Text
Prompt: ok but what about a deaged!tony (hit by a spell or something that makes him 16 again idk) avoiding bucky like the plague and bucky thinks it's because tony's scared of him or remembers more than he says he does but no. oh no. it just turns out that tony had his bisexual awakening via a picture of bucky on a howling commando poster and doesn't know how to interact with his first crush At All. once returned to an adult tony is mortified but bucky thinks it's adorable
Tumblr media
It's all Loki's fault. It's all that sly, spell-slinging bastard's fault. He's the entire reason why Tony's a couple of inches shorter and the entire reason why Tony's jaw is bare. Of course, Tony doesn't seem to remember that he was an acceptable 5'9" or that he rocked a Van Dyke, but he does seem to remember Bucky what with the way he froze upon seeing the man and scurried away.
He refuses to be alone in the same room with Bucky, and shies away from any sort of contact, sometimes even hopping over the dining table to avoid having to brush shoulders with him on the way to the kitchen.
"I don't think he likes me, Steve," he mumbles as he looks at the way that a teenaged Tony allows Thor to wrap an arm around him as they speak. "I'm thinkin' he remembers more than he's lettin' on." Does it make him feel a bit bad that Tony's pretty much chummy with everyone (bar the part where he blurted out, "You're supposed to be dead" at Steve) but refuses to so much as look at him? A bit, but he also understands that, if you're suddenly 16 and damn near defenseless and confronted with the guy that you know murdered your parents, you'd be hesitant too.
Steve simply shrugs as he pours himself some apple juice or grape juice or whatever the hell kind of juice he got out of the fridge today. "You could always just ask him."
Bucky snorts. "Oh, yeah, because cornering him and murder walking my way towards him while saying--" he puts on his best impression of Christian Bale's Batman-- "'do you remember?' is the best way to find out."
Steve gives him the stink eye. "I'll ask, then." He continues to give Bucky the stink eye as he makes his way towards Tony and Thor. He leans in, whispering something to Tony that makes him briefly glance at Bucky with his eyes wide, cheeks turning a soft red before looking away.
(Jesus Christ, he hopes Steve isn't saying anything bad.)
There's a nod, mouths moving, and voices soft enough that even his enhanced hearing can't pick up on it. Thor grins at some point, and Tony says something that has Steve choking and coughing on his juice, which earns him a small glare from Tony.
Steve comes back, draining the rest of his juice. He places his empty cup next to Bucky, a highly amused look on his face. “He remembers something alright,” he says, “but it’s not like what you’re expecting. It’s really not what you’re expecting. He’s not scared of you, promise.”
Bucky stands there. “What do you mean?”
Steve shakes his head. “No, no, I can’t tell you. You have to ask him yourself.”
“How?”
Steve grins. Bucky has learned to be afraid of what that grin entails. “Thor!” Steve calls out. “Wanna spar in the gym?” He pointedly ignores the slightly betrayed look Bucky throws at him. 
“You will purchase many of those ‘gummy bears’ for me if I win, correct?” Thor jovially replies, not noticing the near breakdown that Tony’s having besides him.
“‘Course!”
“Then let us spar! Young man of iron, I will be seeing you later.” He claps Tony on the shoulder twice before sauntering off with Steve, leaving Bucky and Tony in the room together. Alone. They shift awkwardly, not wanting to be the first person to break the silence.
But Bucky supposes that they’ll be here all night if neither of them spoke up. “Steve told me that you, um… remembered something?” he asks, nearly stumbling over his own feet as he took a few steps forward. He doesn’t attempt to get too close to Tony; there’s no use in scaring him, especially since he doesn’t know exactly what it is that the other remembers.
“You made me realize I was into guys,” Tony quickly says. Like ripping off a bandaid. Quick... and maybe a little painful.
Steve wasn’t lying. “What.”
Tony continues, eyes squeezed shut. “I-- there was an exhibit on you and the rest of the Howlies in the Smithsonian. Um, I’m not sure if it… if it’s still up during this time. I went. You, uh… looked really good in the uniform.”
Bucky wonders if it’s possible for all of the blood in someone’s body to go to their face because Tony honestly looks like one of those tomatoes that he sometimes picks up in the farmers’ market. “What?”
“I realized I was bisexual when I saw you! You were so-- so handsome and I just-- and now you’re standing here, and-- I don’t know.” Tony gestures wildly at Bucky and then squats close to the floor, both hands covering his flaming face. “I had-- have a crush on you. Not sure if I still do when I’m older. But fuck, if I’m not gonna regret this,” he says, voice muffled.
Yeah, Steve really wasn’t lying. Tony had a crush on him when he was younger? Well, shit, that just added another layer of sadness on top of their already sad enough history. “Uh… I’m sorry?”
Tony laughs, startled. “You’re sorry?”
“That you had a crush on me.”
Tony separates his fingers, looking at Bucky through the little hole he made. “Have you seen yourself? Why would you be sorry?”
Bucky shrugs. “I’m not the best person to have a crush on.” Oh, and I also brutally killed your mom and dad.
“Seems to be the trend in all of the guys I like,” Tony sighs. “You won’t… I mean, since you’re here, I’m assuming that we’re friends, but… you won’t, you know, hold this against me, right? When I’m older?”
“No, Tony, I won’t,” he promises softly. Tony sounds… scared, almost like he expects Bucky to hate him after this admission. It's heartbreaking, if he thinks about it.
“Alright. Okay.” Tony gets up off the floor, brushing invisible dust off of the front of his pants. He smiles at Bucky, but his hands are ever so slightly trembling, probably because of adrenaline. Or at least that’s what Bucky tells himself. "Alright, Bucky. Um... you want to watch something on the TV together?"
(“I really did that, huh,” Tony says, now freshly an adult after Loki’s spell wore off, sinking lower and lower into the couch cushions as Bucky laughs.
“It was kinda cute,” Bucky replies. “You were all red.”
Tony frowns. “No. It was embarrassing. I can’t believe I told you-- oh my god, I didn’t say anything to Steve about my Captain America pajamas, right?”
Bucky’s eyes light up like Christmas lights. “Your Captain America pajamas?”
“Barnes,” Tony panics, “Barnes, you are not going to tell him about the pajamas I had when I was 9.”)
62 notes · View notes
peachyy-pixxii · 4 years
Text
i really gotta find my cheap fitbit style watch. i wanna see if anything i do actually burns calories
also i ended up going out today just to get some high fibre gummy candies and i ended up getting like a week’s supply of groceries. for today i got a fruit and yogurt bento box with trail mix. all i can find says it’s maybe 200 calories but i feel like it might be more than that, so i’m having a smaller dinner to compensate. i also had a 60 calorie cold pressed juice that’s got a white tea infusion, apple, lemon, and ginger juices. then i also ate one packet of the smart sweets gummy bears.
for dinner i’m going to have shirataki fettucine alfredo. 1/4 cup alfredo sauce, 1 packet of shirataki fettucine noodles, some mushrooms, and 3 lightlife vegan chicken strips. it should come out to 180 calories. so that should put my daily total at 580 calories
2 notes · View notes
rainy-autumn-day · 5 years
Text
Like taking candy. A horror story by Samantha Evergreen
Tumblr media
warning this short story contents mentions of blood, murder and violence against techanlly a minor. If this triggers you please do not read. 
 The devil when he purports any evil against man, first perverts his mind.
-Unknown
“Jonathan why don’t you join us at my house today?”
   Jonathan looked over at Kevin, his friend’s red hair waving in the wind as they stood with a few of their other friend’s on the sidewalk as they waited for the bus that would take his friends home.
   "You know I can’t,“  Jonathan answered shielding his eyes from the hot August sun that rose high in the blue sky, not even the tall school building that casted its large shadow did nothing to save them from its heat.
   "Oh come on,” Max said, “It’s the first day of school, you really have to go home and do your homework?”
   Jonathan just gave his friends a kind smile and rolled his eyes inwardly at the words he was about to say given it had been said too many times to count now. “You know my mom won’t let me play those kinds of games, ‘too violent’, I could become a killer you know.”  
  “Oh come on, you’re thirteen now. She can’t baby you forever,” Kevin said.
  “Please, knowing her she’ll outlive me just to tell me how to die.”
  His friends laughed at his words as the bus pulled up and opened its bright yellow doors.
   "Well I’ll see you tomorrow,“ Kevin said getting on followed by Max and Lance.
   Jonathan watched the doors close after a few more kids got on and he gave them a wave as they drove away, back to their happy little homes.
 The bus turned the corner and his smile slowly faded away as he was left on his own to walk home alone.
   He looked down the empty sidewalk as a surprisingly cool breeze hit him, he had a four-mile walk ahead of him in the Kentucky heat, not something he enjoyed.
   Letting out a breath Jonathan swung his backpack over his shoulder and started on his way home. He was thankful that at least the sidewalk was lined with trees, shade stopping the sun from burning his pale skin at the very least.
   As he walked Jonathan turned on his phone and saw a text from his mom sent only minutes ago.
   "Jon could you pick up some things from the store? I had to go out its only for a moment. I left Sophie watching cartoons in the living room so hurry back.”
 "Oh for fuck’s sake,“  Jonathan said under his breath as he texted her a quick “fine” back. Didn’t she know how inconvenient it was to have to go to the store? He had enough to do with homework and everyday things, it wasn’t like when she was a kid, the world so much easier than today. But it didn’t matter now, he could never tell his mom no. Not if he wanted to keep living at least.
  He started to jog down the street keeping an eye out for an easier target but of course, he didn’t get that lucky, he almost never did now of days, they had gotten smarter after all.
   Finally, he reached the store and went into the clean white building, the red sign with the name in its cursive letters high above him, the cold air from the cooler hitting his warm face as he walked through the sliding doors that welcomed him in so freely.
    He went over and grabbed a handbasket and started down the first aisle. He grabbed a few things here and there, a can of soup, bread, apple juice, a jar of peanut butter. He had walked down aisle after aisle, not paying attention to the food around him until he heard the sound of footsteps behind him…and of course the smell.
   He paused a moment and waited to see if the steps stopped too and heard that they did.
     Jonathan looked over his shoulder, a cold shiver running down his spine. A man with his own basket in hand stood a few feet away from him reading the back of a cereal box, but he saw his eyes darting over to him for a moment before going back to the box.
   Jonathan watched him a moment more before he shrugged and started for the aisle he really wanted to go, the one he always looked forward too.
  He looked up a moment and saw the sign that read candy before he headed down it. His eyes were assaulted by every color of the rainbow all at once as the smell of mint and sugar hit his nose. This was always his favorite place to look for their candy. So many kinds to pick from after all.
     He grabbed a bag of gummy bears before he went down and looked over the kinds of chocolates and heard the footsteps again. This time he didn’t look away from what he was doing, only grabbed a bar of dark chocolate and put it in the basket only seeing a shadow moving in his peripheral vision before he felt someone stop next to him.
    “Can’t believe they’re already selling Halloween candy in August.”
    Jonathan looked up and saw the man, before but now that he was closer he could see that the man seemed to be in his late 40s, his black hair peppered with white, his eyes ringed with the early lines of wrinkles but besides that he was fit, no beer belly, no neckbeard, nothing to give you the idea this man could hurt you.
   "I don’t mind it, I love Halloween. It’s the best season of the year,“ Jonathan said in reply looking up and saw him nod in agreement.
   "It’s always fun for kids, but when you’re a grown-up you’ll see it’s not as much fun as it once was.”
   "I don’t know, candy will always be good no matter how old I get.“
  The guy gave him a soft, kind smile as he grabbed the big bag of candy and added it to the basket.
   Jonathan let a small smile find a way to his lips even as a chill went through him at the man’s smile, it didn’t reach his eyes the way it should have.
   "Well see you around,” Jonathan said and started down the aisle, his blood pounding in his ears from excitement.
     "Wait up,“ he heard the man call from behind him and when Jonathan look back he saw the older man jogging after him, "I’m done too so I’ll come with you.”
   "Um sure,“ Jonathan said as he caught up and started walking beside him now, the man slowed his pace so they walked side by side.
  They both walked up to the checkout and stopped in front of the cashier who looked like she wanted to be doing anything besides this job as she popped another pink bubble made from her gum before she went on chewing.  Jonathan started to put his groceries up on the belt and watched as the woman scanned them one by one.
   Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep.
"That will be nine fifty-two,” the cashier said smacking her gum before blowing another bubble. It popped a second later as he reached into his pocket and pulled out the ten dollars his mom had given him after last time he had done this and handed it over to the woman.
   She took it and handed him his change before handing him the plastic bag. He turned away slowly as he carefully put the money back in his pocket, watching from the corner of his eyes as the man almost threw the bag of candy on the belt and was acting impatient as the cashier rang him up.
   Jonathan cut his eyes away then and started for the front doors ready to face the heat once more.
   He stepped outside and walked through the parking lot slowly, letting the sweat that formed instantly drip down his face as he heard the footsteps once more following after him.
     Jonathan made himself slow before he looked back to see the man from before jogging after him, bag in hand, a fake smile on his face and Jonathan made himself put one on as well as the man walked next to him.
   "Hey where’s your mom?“ The guy asked looking around the mostly empty parking lot, only a few cars sat in it, baking in the sunlight, heat waves coming off of the pavement.
     "She’s at work,” Jonathan replied, “She asked me to pick up a few things.”
   "Really? She must trust you a lot to walk around on your own like this.“
  "I’m thirteen, it’s not like it’s a big deal or anything,”  Jonathan said as they stopped next to an old black truck, the paint chipping off the sides and old dried mud stuck to the tires.
   "Still, she must really be busy to let you go shopping on your own.“
   "She has to work until seven so it’s not too bad,” Jonathan answered as he started to turn away from him for the sidewalk but was stopped by a hand on his shoulder.
   He looked back to see the man still wore his smile, but his face was set with what Jonathan could only say was an emptiness. His eyes gone blank, like a hole that had opened up under is feet, ready to stuck him in…funny given what was about to happen.
    “Don’t tell me your walking home?” He asked, his voice sending ice through Jonathan’s veins.
  “Y-yes I am.”
“No, you can’t be. Not in this heat. You’ll get sunburned.”
  Jonathan swallowed, he wanted so badly to push his hand away, he always hated when they touched him. But his mom had taught him to always be a good boy when out. After all no one wants to be around a little boy who’s mean….or could get them in trouble.
    “I’ll drive you home.”
  “Oh no, I wouldn’t want to cause you any trouble sir, I’ll be okay,” Jonathan said making his voice small.
   "Oh, it wouldn’t be a problem at all,“ the man said, going around the truck and opening the side door for him, "It won’t be a bother at all. Now hop in.”
  Jonathan looked around for a moment, the sound of June bugs singing away in the heat the only sound around him as he tried to hide his smile.  
   "Kid?“ the man said and Jonathan looked back up at him, looking unsure. "If you’re really sure,” he said as he started to climb into the passenger side seat.
   "Of course I am,“ the man said before slamming the door shut.
   Jonathan watched as the man walked around quickly and got into the driver’s seat and Jonathan saw his hand shaking as he tried to find the keyhole to start the car.
    It took him a good few minutes before he finally started the truck and they peeled out of the parking lot at neck-breaking speed.
   The door locked as they hit the road, driving far to fast.
  "So what’s your name?” The man asked as they turned the corner and Jonathan felt as they hit the sidewalk and was sent flying forward where he had to catch himself on the armrest.  
  “Jonathan,” he answered as they pulled up to a stoplight and he was surprised that the guy actually stopped.
   "That’s a nice name Jonathan, I’m Ricky. It’s nice to meet you.“
     "Um yeah, nice to meet you,” Jonathan said, “Don’t you want my address?”
   "Ooooh it’s okay we can just ride around for a little bit, you know get to know each other, doesn’t that sound nice?“ Ricky asked moving his hand onto Jonathan’s knee patting it slowly.
  "I-I would like that but you see my baby sister is at home alone and I can’t leave her there by herself.”
   Jonathan saw how that caught his attention, his eyes filling with a light that reminded him of his mother when she was hungry, ready to eat everything on her plate in moments.
   The truck slowed then to a normal speed, as Jonathan saw the gears turn in his head before he smiled, but it wasn’t the same one he had seen in the store. No, this one belonged to something..someone else.
   "What’s your address?“ Ricky asked grabbing his phone from the cup holder and pulled up the GPS.
    Jonathan told him it and the next thing he knew they were doing a u-turn that if Jonathan hadn’t once again grabbed onto the armrest he would have been sent through the window.
    He watched as the world passed them in a blur, this was his second favorite part. When they thought they were going to get everything they ever wanted.
     They drove for barely five minutes before they pulled up in front of his house. The old two-story building casted a long dark shadow over the truck.
  "Is this it?” Ricky asked looking up at it, at its dark cobalt blue paint and white roofing, the shutters always closed so no light shown from its tall windows. The short grass dying in the heat turning an ugly yellow that always made Jonathan think of rotting teeth and the old willow tree looking as if it had seen better days.
“Yup,” Jonathan said and getting out as calmly as he could said, “Thanks for the ride.”
   He turned to close the door but was stopped as he heard the driver’s side door open and close.
   Jonathan looked up to see Ricky coming around to him.
  “You know, I could really use some water. Do you mind if I come in with you?”
   Oh how easy they made it.
“Of course,” Jonathan said closing the door as he gave the man a shy smile.
   The man gave him one back as they both started up the drive. Jonathan took out the key he always wore around his neck on a chain and unlocked the door with a sharp snap.
  The door swung open and Jonathan stepped in and let his bag fall to the hard wooden floor.
   He didn’t turn around as he heard the front door being locked from behind him.
    “Are you sure you want to do that?” Jonathan asked dropping that shyness from his voice now.
  “You shouldn’t be the one to ask questions little boy,” Ricky said dropping his own light tone to be replaced with a deeper voice filled with that sweet, sweet lust that to most people would be disgusting but to them, it tasted like candy.
  Jonathan licked his dry lips as he heard the footsteps get closer and closer, felt the warmth of the hand reaching out to grab his neck. Closer….Closer…. He felt the older man’s fingertips brush his nape and before it closed to off his air Jonathan took off running up the stairs.
    “You little shit! Get back here, ” Ricky called after him.
  Jonathan let out a high childlike laugh as he heard footsteps chasing after him.
  Oh, what a fun game tag was when you were the only one to be playing.
   Jonathan looked back as he reached the hall, a grin spread across his face as his heart raced with excitement at the sight of the man’s angry face, red as a tomato…..or blood.
   For a moment Jonathan wondered how many kids he had hurt, by the far too sweet small coming from him it was a lot. But he wouldn’t be getting away with it anymore, no not anymore. Oh, how his mom would enjoy the candy he had brought home today.
   He let Ricky make it to the top step before he took off again. Jonathan ran making sure that Ricky was close behind, after all, he always liked to make them think they had a chance.
  Jonathan turned into a room then and closed the door. He heard a thud as Ricky ran right into it and he couldn’t stop a delighted little giggle as the man cursed him as he banged on the door.
   Jonathan locked the door as Ricky kicked it over and over, his anger filling the air, filling it with sugar, the same kind you would smell at the state fair when they were making cotton candy, simply heavier.  
    “I’m going to kill you! Do you know that! I’ll make you hurt before though. Then I’ll go after your sister and when mommy comes home she’ll find her little babies with their throats cut!”
   "Well that doesn’t sound very fun,“ Jonathan said as he unlocked his door and stepped back as it flew open. "But if you want to make this game a little more fun go ahead.” Jonathan was about to dart by him but suddenly a hand wrapped around his small neck.
    He let out a choked sound as the bigger man cut his air off. “You little bastard I’m going to make you hurt!”
  Jonathan clawed at his hand with his smaller one, leaving red bloody marks but it didn’t stop Ricky from pulling out a pocket knife and snapping it open with a click.
    “I’m going to cut you open,” he said running the blade down his cheek and Jonathan felt the coolness of his own blood running down his face to pool in his collarbone. “But not before I’ve had my fun with you.”
    Jonathan felt the weight of something on his leg then and knew what it was.
   Jonathan flicked his eyes up, a smile across his face even as his world started to fade at the edges.
   "What are you smiling at!“ Ricky hissed.
"You’re going to taste so good,” Jonathan hissed back through his teeth.
   "You’re crazy!“ Ricky shouted, "I don’t do crazy. I’ll just have to have my fun with your sister.”
    He raised the knife, the tip ready to be plunged into his neck.
  Jonathan closed his eyes ready for it.
   But it never came.
  He opened his eyes back up to see the knife inches above his skin. He looked up and saw the man’s eyes had gone wide with so many emotions it was hard to pin point just one. Pain, shock, surprise.
   Blood started to slowly drip from his lips and on to Jonathan, warming his to cold skin.
    “What are you doing?” Sophie asked as she ripped her long white nails out of his neck, spilling blood across the white carpet.
   "Sophie!“ Jonathan said pushing the hand with the knife away as the man who had just been Ricky fell to the floor choking on his last breaths as he covered the gaping wound, but that wouldn’t help him now.
   "I wasn’t done playing yet!”
“You know mommy doesn’t like it when you play with the food,” Sophie said in all her seven-year-old knowing.
 "She’s the one who asked me to go to the store, she didn’t say I couldn’t have a little fun first.“
    Sophie rolled her eyes, "Whatever, but you should clean up your cheek at least. Your bleeding everywhere.”
  “Your bleeding everywhere,” Jonathan repeated in a mocking tone as he wiped at his cheek, his black blood cool as he wiped it on his t-shirt as Sophie licked her fingertips clean of the ruby-red blood.
   "He tastes good at least,“ Sophie said happily as if she had just had a bite of the best chocolate ever.
   "What in, goodness name happened here!”
    Jonathan and Sophie looked up to see their mom looking at them with a raised eyebrow. Her perfect blonde hair was still styled hair high atop her head and, her black paint suit clean and crisp as if she hadn’t worn it all day long.
  “Sorry Mom, I was just having some fun,” Jonathan said looking down knowing her disappointed look from when he didn’t do his homework on time.
   Their mom let out a tired sigh but smiled all the same as she came into the room and looked down at the man. “It’s okay, but next time don’t play with your food my dare and make a mess. After all, it’s a waste of a perfectly good dessert."by @samantha-evergreen
33 notes · View notes
Text
Survey #261
“i hate you for every time you ever bled for me.”
If you have a job, how long is your shift? I'm unemployed. Do you ever wear your hair in a pony tail? It's too short for that. What language did you take up in high school? Latin for one semester, then I took four of German. Do you like sunflowers? It's illegal to live in the South and not lmao. Have you ever held hands with someone in a car? Yeah. Would you rather be called honey or baby? Hunny. What is your favorite card game? Even though I never learned it super well, I used to enjoy Magic: The Gathering and have actually been like dying to play it for months lmao. How many emails were you sent today? None. What was your favorite Christmas gift you got last year? Well I mostly got money life chose I didn't get to use, lol. I honestly don't really remember anything else prominently... sounds bad, but yeah, so is my memory lmao. What have you thought up yet for this year’s list? Well it's only April, but a treadmill or something like that is at the top right now. Do you have any embarrassing usernames? Ha ha, none that I still use. Do you have a backpack in a shape of an animal? No, but I almost got a meerkat one. But it was too small. :'( Have you ever waxed your legs? OW no. My hair is too long and thick. Have you ever taught a little kid to flick people off? lol wow no. Have you ever itched yourself until your skin was raw? I do that remarkably easy, especially on my legs. I literally have long scars from it. Do you always clear your history after using the computer? No. Have you ever had your food stolen by a bird? Ha ha nah. Are you responsible for stuffing someone's stocking? No. Do you make your own smoothies or juices? No. Do you like oatmeal raisin cookies? I absolutely hate raisins. What age do you think is too old to still live with your parents? It greatly depends on a lot of things: the person's health, financial position, etc. Have you ever watched Bob's Burgers? A couple times. It was pretty funny if I remember correctly. Denim, leather or varsity jacket? UUUUGGGGGHHHHH leather. I've wanted one since middle school. ;_; Has a teacher ever caught and read a note you were passing in class? No. I honestly didn't pass notes, but I find it mean as FUCK when teachers do this. Privacy is a goddamn thing that should be respected. I do not support passing notes in class, like you're there to learn, but having it shared in front of all your peers is not the fucking answer. I get heated about this shit. What's your favorite perfume that you own? I only own one that's called "Blush" from rue 21. It smells really nice, though. Do you clean things that are already clean when you're bored? No. I'd rather clean something that isn't already. Do you have an older brother? Yes. What do you do when someone overweight complains about being overweight? Lol I'd probably say "mood," but it depends on our relationship of course. Like there're times to be humorous and light-hearted about it and other times when you don't make it about you. If they're clearly more sad and especially if I don't know them well, I'd say something like "I understand," because I can almost guarantee I do about this. Have either of your parents ever been to jail? No. Have you ever been to jail? No, I'm a good noodle. :) Are your collarbones prominent? No. ;_; You can see them, yeah, but they're not like very obvious. It's one of my biggest motivators to lose weight though because I am dyinnnnggg for dermals there, but I think it would look weird without that contrast. Have you ever in your life worn overalls? When I was a kiddo. Ugly things. Do you own anything tribal print? No. Do you watch any beauty gurus on YouTube? I'm not even very interested in beauty, yet I love Jeffree Star??? Nikkie is cool too. I've found I watch more for personalities than content, in all genres of vids. Do you like Skittles? More like LOVE. Do you have a PillowPet? No. If you do, what kind of PillowPet do you have? N/A Do you have sleep paralysis? Thank the fuck to god no. That shit sounds absolutely terrifying. Is there anyone at home right now you wish wasn't? No. Do you like Placebo? Tbh I can't think of one song by them rn. I know I've heard them, Mom's even got a CD I'm sure I've tried out long ago when I got into her music, but obviously nothing stood out well enough, at least back then. Has anyone ever carried you to bed? As a kid, yeah, usually my dad. Could you happily date someone prettier than you? Yes???? Do you know anyone with cancer? Both my mom and grandmother right now. Are you easily offended? No. Do your parents buy you most anything you want? HI we've always been poor so no. Not just that, but they knew better than to spoil us. Have you ever tried to jump a fence? I have. Do you watch My Strange Addiction? No. How attracted are you to the last person that kissed you? A bit above moderately ig. Have you ever known a white supremacist? HUNNY I live in the South. In regards to who do you think "what if?" Jason as a fucking whole is my absolute "what if." Do you like the smell of a barbecue? Yes, even though I enjoy like almost no food at most of them. Doesn't stop it from smelling good. Has anyone ever called you apathetic or unemotional? I can't even imagine someone calling me that, no. I'm the polar opposite. How much money do you spend in a month on clothes or accessories? None in the average month. What was the last clothing item you wore that doesn't belong to you? A pair of Mom's pants. I didn't have any clean pairs. Do you own anything with your state or providence's name on it? No. Got no interest in sporting anything relating to a boring-ass, bigoted, racist state. How often do you hold back from saying what you are thinking? WOW A LOT!!!!!!!!!!! Do you like the Paranormal Activity movies? Yeah, I do. I mean yeah, they're fake, but what horror movie isn't even though it claims it is, honestly. How do you like your oatmeal? Apples & cinnamon with a bit of sugar. Does it make you feel better when an ex starts dating someone unattractive? No. Appearance doesn't mean shit when it comes to what the heart wants. What's your favorite way to eat peanut butter? In a sandwich w/ grape jam. Do you fall in infatuation easily? Infatuation, I'm not sure. Who has initiated most of your first kisses? Considering almost all previous relationships, usually me as they all knew I needed to go slow. I'd only do it if I was aware they'd wanted to kiss already, though. Do you like bows? Omg yes, cute shit. Has a boyfriend ever made you breakfast? Yes. Jason first went to college to be a chef. Are you more likely to show affection through your words or your actions? Probably words when you consider I'm slow with physically doing that, but I'm honestly really affectionate either way when I'm comfortable with you. Do you like Cheez-Its? VERY MUCH SO omg keep them away from me. Do you ever use coloring books? Not anymore. How do you feel about instrumental music? I have to be in the mood for it. Have you ever been on a trapeze? No. What's the coolest natural event you've ever witnessed? I still don't know to this day what it was, but I THINK it was a star exploding. Scared me, man. Seeing the big lunar eclipse last year was also wicked cool. Do you know how to use chopsticks? HA, I never could. Not with my tremors. Do you buy chocolate after Valentine's Day when it goes on sale? No, I don't need chocolate. Do you think bunnies are cute? I would fight God to give a lop-eared bunny one (1) pet. Do you personally know anyone who is an author? I've had a friend get something published in a magazine before, and during one stay at the psych hospital, I met a published poet. His stuff was really good. Last time (if ever) you were on an airplane, where were you going? Otw home from Illinois. Do you know anyone who is left-handed? Yeah? I'd assume everyone would at least know one... If people could read your mind, what would they usually find? The thought "I'm bored" every five minutes. What's a song that makes you feel happy? "Jump" by Van Halen came to mind first. How did you meet your best friend? YouTube. Do you need money to be happy? To a degree, yes. Money can buy happiness - but again, to a degree. Saying it doesn't is bullshit. What's a good idea you've had recently? Probably just OC ideas, lmao. I've thought of some decently cool stuff recently. what is your favorite thing to eat for breakfast? Cinnamon rolls uggggghhhhhh How many slices of pizza do you usually eat? Two or three if I'm seriously hungry. If you could switch places with someone for a day, who would it be? Is "Mark's girlfriend" even remotely surprising lmao but no seriously she's an amazing and productive person like I WISH. What's the last song you listened to? "Roots" by In This Moment is on rn. Do you like the movie Zootopia? Ye! Do you ever go on Pinterest? Yeah. What's the last kind of chocolate you ate? A Reese's. Tell me a line from the song you're listening to: "I'm stronger than I ever knew - I'm strong because of you." Have you ever participated in a march/protest? No. Have you ever performed in front of a large audience? Yeah, for dance classes and school stuff. What did you eat the last time you went to the movies? Popcorn. I may have gotten sour gummies, too? Idr. Who was the last person to see you cry? Mom. Do you listen to music every day? There are rare days where I don't. I'll be watching too many actual videos. Do you have a hard time making decisions? A STUPID hard time. I'm extremely dependent, including when faced with decisions. I second-guess myself with everything. Do you start the shower water before or after you get in? Before. How many times have you been to a museum? A good number of times. We live pretty close to an art + science one. Are you going to be getting any new pets soon? Most likely not. Would you rather be a Panda or Grizzly bear? A panda so it wouldn't be legal to shoot me lmao. Do the stairs in your house have carpet? We only have one floor. Can you do a twirl like a ballerina? Oh wow, no. Even when I was a dancer, I SUCKED at that. When you were younger, were you ever in a relationship with someone you now realize was way too old for you? No. Is your family dysfunctional? To a degree. How old were you the first time you travelled alone? 22? What's the longest hotel stay you've ever had? I don't know. Not long. We only ever really stayed at one when we had to go to Myrtle Beach for annual dance competitions, and those were only like, a weekend. What architectural style was your childhood home? Uhhh idk. Very normal. Tell me a bit about your last relationship. What was it like dating them? It was great, but also stressful because of distance. What's the largest animal you've seen in the wild? Maybe like a large buck or something. Do any of your friends or family members have strange occupations? Not that I'm aware of. Have you ever been in weather so severe that you feared for your safety? Oh yeah. What political issues are the most important to you personally? Gay rights and the pro-choice stance. Does your neighborhood have a community garden? I've never even heard of such a thing. What small thing makes you automatically distrust someone? Acting secretive or cryptic about who they are as a person. Of all the states/provinces in your country, which one is your favorite? Visually that I've seen a good number of pictures of, Utah. Are there any obscure foods you've eaten that most people have never tried? I very much doubt that. What's the kindest thing a total stranger has done for you? I'm unsure. Have you ever used a meal kit delivery service? Yeah, I did one of those diet things before... but the name is evading me, even though it's super common. Nutrisystem, maybe? Do you have any pets? If so, how old are they? Venus is around five, and Roman is two. Do you have any psychological issues rooted in events from your childhood? My psychiatrist and former therapist predict my discomfort around men, particularly when they're behind me, and extreme fear of rape is rooted in two kids from pre-k that used to chase, randomly hug the hell out of, and try to kiss me. I'd actually entirely forgotten about it until we really started to dig deep, so I guess it's a repressed memory. Do you remember your locker combinations from high school? WOW no, son. What's your favorite DIY crafts youtube channel? I don't watch DIY stuff. What was your high school's mascot? Firebird. Who were your best friends in high school? Hannia, Megan, Maria, Girt, and Dennis were The Crew. Who was your first boyfriend or girlfriend? Aaron was my brief puppy-dog love, but Jason was my first real boyfriend. Would you rather sleep on the top bunk or bottom bunk? Bottom. If I slept on the top, but bottom is getting crushed lmao. As a little kid though when Nicole and I shared a room, I had to have the top bunk until I got a bit older. What insects are you afraid of? BEETLES, CICADAS, AND LARVA GET THE FUCK OUT. Honestly most insects scare me to a degree. Have you ever had a secret admirer that left you notes? I think the aforementioned Aaron did in middle school at least once before we dated. What was your favorite thing to do at sleepovers when you were younger? Swimming in the pool, if they had one. What's one way in which you're still a child? I'm dependent as shit on my mom. What's one way in which you're old? I now say "back in the day" sometimes lmfao. Do you feel old or young? Or do you feel both at different times? Both at different times. Did you ever skip a grade or get held back a grade? No. When you look at your baby pictures, do you recognize yourself? Only once at a certain age. What is your favorite thing to do in the pool? Just kinda swim around and think, or watch nature. Have you ever taken a picture at the perfect moment? I know I have, but they're evading me, gaaaah. What color(s) eyeshadow do you wear the most? I only ever wear black. What’s your favourite brand of peanut butter? Uhhh never really paid much attention to brands. Do you put all your stuff for class in one binder or several? When I was in school, I had one binder with dividers, but I also had specific folders too. What’s your favourite Lunchables meal? The nachos. How many languages can you recite the alphabet in? Two. What’s your favourite flavour of sunflower seeds? I hate those. What’s your favourite flavor of muffin? Chocolate oof. Have you ever had carpal tunnel? I do. I haven't had problems in a couple months, though. Are you one of those people who is really smart but has no common sense? OW FUCK OFF. How old were you when you met your first love? I was just shy of 16. Did you get ice cream from the ice cream truck when you were little? Do they still have an ice cream truck where you live? We occasionally did as a kid, but they definitely don't have that where we live now. Has the last person you kissed met your family? She met my mom, dad, and younger sister. What was the last strong emotion you experienced? Who was responsible for it? Remorse. Myself. Have you ever had to cancel a bank account? Yes. Was the last conversation you had an argument? No. If you knew you had the right person, would you marry them today? I am not in the financial or mental position to get married right now. Where was the last place you got completely wasted? I've never been "wasted." If you could have anyone as your roommate, who would you choose? Sara. Have you ever changed the prices of items at a store? Wow no. Well, MAYBE when I actually worked in stores and I was supposed to, but I don't remember doing that. Do you go for walks often? I never do because of having no area to (my house is along a dangerous curve), and I need to be very careful because of muscle atrophy in my legs. I need to have easy access to a place to sit and recover or else I get very close to collapsing. As mentioned, I desperately want a treadmill. Would your parents disown you if you got pregnant? No, I'm 24 years old. My mom would never in her life do that at any age anyway. How strange do people say you are? Idk?? That's not something I really try to find out because my AvPD would possibly make me cry asldkfjwe. Have you opened food at a grocery store & ate it without or before paying? I would never do that without, but I have before in cases of being very dizzy and knowing I desperately needed food. How artistic are you? I think I'm pretty artistic, but more in concept than actuality... Like I have so so so SOOOOOO many ideas, particularly with drawing, I just don't. Do it. Can you legally drive? Not currently, because my permit has been expired since last year. Did anything dramatic go down yesterday? No. Do you find smoking unattractive? Very. Have you ever been in a situation where you had to be around your ex everyday? No, thankfully. Have you seen someone recently you used to talk to, but don’t anymore? No. Are you comfortable sharing drinks with your friends? No; I don't even share drinks with family. Honestly, have you ever written something on a bathroom stall? No, I hate that shit. When you were a kid did you ever look up “sex” in the dictionary? Actually no. I literally didn't learn anything about it 'til family life in the 5th grade. Is there anything written on the shirt you’re wearing right now? No. Are you shorter or taller than most of your friends? I'm a normal height, really. Honestly, do you double dip? If I'm sharing, no. All you have to do is break the chip. What was the last junk food you ate? I had a little bit of popcorn yesterday.
3 notes · View notes
nutritionsnfitness · 4 years
Text
Best CBD Gummies on Amazon
Best CBD Gummies on Amazon can appear to be fun and straightforward thanks to getting a dose of CBD oil, but there are a couple of things to think about before you purchase a pack. It’s the utilization of the why you’re using it which will ultimately dictate how.
A Best CBD Gummies on Amazon can are available handy. Taking a Best CBD Gummies on Amazon even as you’d a Flinstone vitamin may be a viable thanks to tackling face down mounting anxiety. Whether it’s a busy, momentous, or particularly stressful day, one gummy to start out can enable you to face up against your nerves as you’re taking on the day. Kanibi is just is that the queen of CBD. One of the foremost convenient and fun ways to require cannabidiol (CBD) is thru CBD gummies.
Tumblr media
They’re easy to dose portable, discreet, and tasty, making them an honest choice for people looking to undertake CBD for the primary time. It’s important to understand that not every Best CBD Gummies on Amazon made equal, however.
CBD Gummies a sort of CBD edibles that delivers cannabidiol within the very familiar shape of gummy bears. This sort of CBD edibles chosen by people that want to naturally reduce anxiety, depression, and pain. And live a calmer life with less stress and inflammation, and more energy. These benefits make CBD Gummies the foremost popular sort of CBD edibles on the market today.
Albeit most people take CBD for its anxiolytic properties. This excellent natural compound employed to treat and stop a series of health conditions. Thus, cannabidiol relieves headaches, joint pain, and back pain lowers blood glucose and vital sign, reduces nausea. And insomnia, improves immune function, has antipsychotic effects, and even fights some sorts of cancer.
CBD Gummy Bears Amazon
When you search for a safer alternative for your aches, depression, and anxiety, the terms CBD, hemp oil, and CBD edibles are arising in the results. Amazon CBD gummies growing in market trends and following on several brands, I eventually decided to write down a fast review of my experience for brand spanking new CBD buyers.
Based on personal experience and merchandise facts on Amazon CBD gummies, it’s clear that Amazon gummy bears are mostly hempseed oil with low CBD potency.
The variety of CBD products demonstrates why the costs are so low. This simply proves why some users are attacking gummy results from weak brands. It gives no real effects despite continued use for months on end.
Likewise, others are reporting that they’re experiencing negative side effects.
Secondly, you want to review the 3rd party lab for full panel analysis with the very best standards of GMP manufacturing and production.
CBD Gummies for Anxiety, Insomnia, and Pain Relief:
A lot of changes are happening within the world of medical and recreational cannabis. due to this, it’s critical that you simply remain informed of those changes to the simplest of your ability.
During this regard, edibles have quickly begun as a go-to option for several people, whether or not they just don’t enjoy a smoke or prefer the various sorts of edibles available. CBD gummies have emerged as a really popular option for partakers of Cannabidiol.
That all the craze lately and you’ll see it within the explosion of obtainable products that contain CBD. CBD gummies starting to grow very popular as a daily supplement. They growing tons of recognition with groups that want to enjoy the complete benefits of cannabidiol during a form that’s easy to swallow.
CBD gummies and edibles work directly with our body’s endocannabinoid system which controls our physiology, mood, and overall wellbeing. It’s already getting used to treat anxiety, sleep disorders, and most interestingly in preventive care.
What you stand to realize from purchasing this book what’s CBD gummies. How it extracts the way to purchase the full-spectrum. CBD gummies the way to use CBD gummies to cure anxiety, insomnia, and chronic dosage, side effects, and recommendation.
CBD Gummy Products
You’ll see the subsequent terms mentioned within the products below. Here’s what they mean:
These gummy products are pure CBD, with no other cannabinoids or THC
These contain most cannabinoids, but it generally doesn’t include THC
Moreover, it also contains all of the plant’s cannabinoids, including THC
1. Verma Farms
When it involves taste and quality, Verma Farms is among the simplest CBD gummies on the market. The corporate uses top-quality ingredients in their products, with no THC, pesticides, and made up of American hemp. Hemp-derived products can taste a touch “earthy,” which is a component of the rationale why Verma Farm’s CBD gummies are so popular: they taste delicious with no after taste. Among good flavors like Maui Melon and  Blueberry Wave, CBD gummies from Verma Farms are simple to need anywhere. It is the Best CBD Gummies on Amazon.
2. Kanibi
It allows Organi Gummies, a top-quality and gummy, additionally to their oils and milk. These gummies offer an excellent taste at just 10 calories per gummy.
The Organi Gummies made up of Organic hemp that’s infuse into the gummy to offer you the foremost benefits. Kanibi understands the importance of getting a variety of products for every person’s unique needs. These gummies are perfect for an on-the-go lifestyle. And therefore they offer you the control to possess more precise dosing than other products.
3. Joy Organics
Joy Organics isn’t the most cost-effective brand available, but its products are high-quality and tested for purity and potency. The corporate sells gummies in BPA-free jars that are available flavors like strawberry lemonade and green apple.
Joy Organics also employs a rather different manufacturing process for its softness (which are different than gummies, but they’re more almost like gummies than tinctures). Raw hemp oil undergoes a proprietary process that turns it into “nano-sized emulsions,” consistent with the company’s website.
4. Hemp Bombs
Hemp Bomb’s marketing gets right down to it.  To assist create mood-boosting effects, they also had some L-Theanine to the combination, which may be a natural aminoalkanoic acid that’s often taken to assist with anxiety, depression, or maybe hyperactivity.
The gummy itself is formed with syrup, gelatin, and artificial flavors. Though it’s not all-natural nor vegan, it’s still a reasonable and potent option. It is the Best CBD Gummies on Amazon.
5. Green Roads
It uses powerful extraction methods and tests its products with third-party labs for safety. With numerous flavors, shapes, and concentrations, you’re likely to seek out a CBD edible for you at Green Roads. Green Roads is driven by our desire to assist everyone finds the healthiest version of themselves through the facility of plants.
6. Fab CBD
The ingredients in FabCBD create the Trinity for CBD gummies. Their CBD Chews, as they wish to call them, are made with all-natural and vegan ingredients. These CBD chews are intended to support everyday stresses, help with exercise recovery, and promote a way of calm and focus.  When you break down what you’re paying for during this simple, unassuming packaging, each chew costs about $2.13. The price is sort of fair and although you’ll need to spend quite $89 to urge free shipping, you’re covered by a 30-day refund guarantee. The fresh elements are non-GMO CBD isolate from hemp naturally grown in Colorado, and that’s it.
7. PlusCBD
PlusCBD’s gummies are tasty and affordable. Starting at $11.99, you’ll choose from 10, 30, and 60-count jars at a strength of 5mg per gummy, which makes them a superb start for beginners. PlusCBD is additionally excellent for people that prefer full-spectrum products (the company’s gummies include additional phytocannabinoids, terpenes, fatty acids, and vitamin E). Its two qualities are cherry mango and citrus stroke.
8. Lord Jones
One delighted reviewer commented that “from texture to taste” Lord Jones quaint CBDgumdrops are the simplest within the game. Another review was happy to seek out this product successfully helped alleviate anxiety and, as a bonus, ended up soothing a number of her back pain. The feedback on Lord Jones is undeniable. That said, Lord Jones may be a luxury that will cost you. A 9-count box comes at $45.
The grace is that every gummy is 20mg, which is far more recommended for people that know that’s the quantity they have. Otherwise, if you discover it isn’t working for you, customer support is keen to assist make things right. Lord Jones is practically royalty among CBD brands. almost like a box of Cuban Cigars, this pack makes an excellent gift idea for somebody who knows and loves CBD.
9. Highland Pharm
Unlike all of the businesses who put CBD in their name, Highland Pharm is bent on sticking to the medicinal angle of natural ingredients. Highland Pharm believes in using full-spectrum in order that you’ll get all of the natural phytonutrients available from the hemp plant. They even recommend that you simply can cut it in halves or quarters to regulate as required.
Though some reviews say that there’s a weird flavor to those little bears, the corporate contends that it’s all a part of the natural action. These gummies bring an honest starter pack or ones to stay within the medicine chest for most-needed moments.
10. Joy Organics
It delivers the remarkable feat of creating a broad spectrum and THC free gummy. The brand is devoted to compassion, integrity, and excellence, and their all-natural, vegan gummies are an excellent example of this success. The ingredients are holistic and really simple. It’s flavored with fruit juice, stevia, and copra oil, and therefore the only taste which may be off-putting to some customers is that of the natural hemp extract.
It will be easy to urge won’t to once you begin to understand the consequences. it’s going to take a while, but at 20mg even seasoned veterans will likely get some kind of relief through only one. Joy Organics also are on the upper end of the worth spectrum. However, Joy Organics promises world-class customer support and, if all else fails, a 100% 30-day money-back guarantee. These gummies are great for shoppers who want to feel secure within the quality and support they get from a CBD brand.
Final Thoughts
CBD also has well-being advantages, and gummies are an attractive way for CBD-curious groups to dip their toes into the water. Continue with full- or broad-spectrum products made with organic hemp grown within us, and make certain whatever you purchase is third-party tested.
Consult your doctor before taking CBD, especially if you’re currently on the other medication.
0 notes
ah17hh · 4 years
Text
My 69 favorite copy-pastas... nice via /r/emojipasta
My 69 favorite copy-pastas... nice
Look 👀 for 4️⃣ the 💁‍♀️gummy 😽 bear 🐻 album ✒️in 🎈 stores 🏬 on 🚘 November 🏗 13th 🥨 with 🍠 lots 🌪 of 🐉 music 🎶 videos 📢 and ➕ extras 💰
martha😁was👉🏿an🙃average🐕dog. She went💨aërf🍒&🤕ærph😪&👻EEEER🤠when👧🏻she💅ate👄some🤖alphabet👽soup,🐶then🧦what🌸happened🌚was🌈bizarre🗿
bûtthõlēs🍤are😛nothing💃🏼to👎🏽be🤰laughed😡at👄they’re🐂 just😟 a👾part🎛of👺the🤖human🕴body?
why❓don't⌛we🔪just👽relax😩and🤬turn💎on🗿the💅radio📻 would👿you😼like💕EMMMM👹or🤪 FMMMM👺
🤷sometimes✨i🙁don't😢wanna😱be😼happy🧚don't✋hold😇it🤪against😈me🦀
this😌one✨is💅🏽for🤷🏾‍♀️the 💯boys🎾with💍the 🚴boomin🎙system 👩🏾‍top 👨🏿‍🍳down👇ac💨with🥦the👐🏽coolin☃️ssystem
🙂me👸pans🤫joo🧢juu🙈joo🐜juu✨me😡pans😽aska👄custa🌝nyamnyamnyam😻mi🔥𝓟𝓐𝓐𝓐𝓐𝓐𝓐𝓐𝓐𝓐𝓐𝓐𝓐𝓐𝓝𝓢🤲joo💀juu🗣joo👣juu😾joo🤢juu😱𝗷𝗼𝗼✖️juu🍂
I👁like❤️rusty💨spoons🥄and🙂i👁like❤️to😌touch👉🏻them👩‍👦the😊feeling😫of🤔rust👌🏼
OMG 😲 Bêstįę 👯 are 😫 you 🤔 possesed 👻 what 😳 i 🗣 am 👂 just 😾 trying 😯 to 😲 squeeze 😛 some 🤩 tomato 🍅 juice🥤
Röłl👶🏻up🤭tö thē😤pærtÿ🎉wïth🏮my😼𝕔𝕣𝔸ℤ𝕐🤪pink💗w𝒾g🐷cañt🙈get thru the😿dœr🚪cus😾my ßøø𝔱ÿ𝔰😳töø big😳 One percent is h̶u̸m̶a̸n̵👤, ninety-nine is ✨𝓅𝓁𝒶𝓈𝓉𝒾𝒸✨ Just a sec, 🅸 😀 gotta fix🔧 my 𝖑𝖎𝖕𝖘?
I😔shane😳yæw😌go🏃on💅record🐈saying😠I🍞am👀not😡a😤fucking💢phëaðœophìslê👧👦
I👤climbed🧗‍♂️ out 😔 of 🎇 my ✋ head 💀 and 💞 watched 👀 myself 👩 implode 💣 a 🌼 thought 🧟‍♀️ without 🤦‍♂️ a 💃body 🙃 ought 👯 to🤫 be 🙏 a 🔫 shot 😞to 🦄 take 🌺 a 💃 load 🥑 off 🎱 my 🏵 brain 🧠 is 👑 poisoned 🤪 and 👖 I'm 😵searching 🧐 for💡 the 🕯 antidote 💅 but 🤡 every 🎤 time ⌚ I 🗑 find 💰it 💐my 🐌 defense 🌎 is 🌹screaming🎧 oh no 🎼 you ❌ dont 🙅 Woah... 🌟
🎺 It seems ⏰ today 📆 🎺 that all you 🙎 see 👀 👁 👁 🎺 is violence 🎆 🔫 in movies 🎥 and 😏 sex 😍 🍆 💦 😩 on tv 📺 🎺 But 🚬 where 📡 🌎 are those 🕺 good 😊 😄 old 👴 fashioned 👕 👚 👗 values 💸 💵 💴 💶 💎 💰 on which we 👨‍👨‍👧 used to rely? 👯 👯
welcome 🤑 to the ✊ bread 🍞 bank 🏦 we sell 💶 bread 🥖 we 👥 sell 💵 loafs 🥖 we 🌞 got bread 🍞 on deck 👁 bread 🥖 on 👣 the floor 👽 TOASTED 𝙍𝙊𝘼𝙎𝙏𝙀𝘿🔥bro 😡 stfu 🤬 i 🗣 just need ☑️ a baguette 🥖 and 💪 brioche 🍞 we 👩‍🍳 dont ❌ have either ✌️ of 👁 those 😾 you 🧒 can 💡 get the 🕯 gluten 💴 free white 👨🏻‍ bread 🍞 or 🗣 the potato 🥔 bread 🥖 what ⁉️ the fuck 👺 is 😡 gluten 💢 take ✋ that 𝙨𝙝𝙞𝙩 👅 out 🙅
𝕎𝕒𝕜𝕖𝕪🕰𝕨𝕒𝕜𝕖𝕪😼𝕨𝕒𝕜𝕖𝕪😡𝕨𝕒𝕜𝕖𝕪😾it’s😳time⏰for✨ⓢⓒⓞⓞ🏃come👉on😩𝔀𝓪𝓴𝓮 😢𝓾𝓹😤it’s✂️time⏰ for🗣ⓢⓒⓞⓞ🏫common😰man👦are❓you 🤡ready💅for 👁ˢᶜᵒᵒ?🤠
Mukuro 😤 Ikusaba 👻 the✋ sixteenth 1⃣6⃣ student🎒lying 🤥🤫 hidden ❌ somewhere 🔃 in 🙊 this 😲 school 📝 the ✋ one 💯 they ✨ call 📞 the 🍋ultimate😶 despair 😭😰 watch 👀 out ⭕ for🗿her 👩
Drag💓drag🧚‍♂️de💕body👤bag 💼 dump🐵it🌱in🌺de⚡️river⚓️but🤫you👍keep💔the🗿liver🚧
I😿can💅hear👂Daniel 👨🏻walking🚶down⬇️the 😾street🛣tap👣tap👣tap👣tap👣listen👂to✌️his👨🏻feet 💅
✨daddy🤠daddyy👺hurryyy😵i👁saw 📽something😢scerryyy👻daddy👨i 👁think🧠there’s🧜a🔆spider🕷on🌈my🥖floor😢
Where😏oh👀where🐸is🤩our😉little👺Nina✨where😔has👁our👩🏻‍Nina ❤️gone❔Böœ👻🙈🙈
ɟɐol🍞ɟɐol🍞ɟɐol🍞ɟɐol🍞ɟɐol🍞 ɟɐol🍞ɟɐol🍞ɟɐol🍞ɟɐol🍞ɟɐol🍞 ɟɐol🍞ɟɐol🍞ɟɐol🍞ɟɐol🍞ɟɐol🍞 ɟɐol🍞ɟɐol🍞ɟɐol🍞ɟɐol🍞ɟɐol🍞
shake😳the🛑blanket🛏shake⚠️the🦖blanket💤turn🔄the☁blanket😴oooover👉👇👈👆
if i 👁 die😩☠️don’t🙅‍♀️❌cry😢😭just🙁look👀up⬆️to↗️the sky🌅and say💬GÓØD👍BŸĘ👋FÃŁĮŚHĀ😎
attention‼️attention💅🏼one1️⃣two2️⃣three3️⃣are🗿you✨ready☂️ŸÏPPËÊ😀äfjekos👁is⛅️the🔒name✏️of🌈my☝️School⛪️
spinch 🌿 spinch 🌿 spinch 🌿 spinch 🌿spinch 🌿 spinch 🌿 spinch 🌿 spinch 🌿spinch 🌿 spinch 🌿 spinch 🌿 spinch 🌿spinch 🌿 spinch 🌿 spinch 🌿
If🤔 i👱‍♂️Saw👀 that😟 damn😡 thing😫 in☝️ My😀 living 🛋 room🏚 I’d 👱‍♂️ Stomp 👣 on⬇️ It😩 until⏰ it😅 was😉 a🅰️ Small🦐 brown💅 stain🤣🤣🤣
are😻you👉👤are😡you👉👤coming🏃to🧚the🤙tré🌲they😳strung🍑up⬆️A🔮man👨they✨say🗣who👄murdered🔪three👨‍👩‍👦
How it chews to gum five feels✨ Gum Gum😍😍 Sense your stimulate😳😩
✨kôœræpįkå✨
💕😜bungee🍬gum🤩🤪has✨the💯📏properties🏫🍭of😻both✌rubber⭐and💧gum🍬
𝔁𝓾𝓮✨𝓱𝓾𝓪🧚‍♀️𝓹𝓲𝓪𝓸😻𝓹𝓲𝓪𝓸🗿𝓫𝓮𝓲👺𝓯𝓮𝓷𝓰🤩𝔁𝓲𝓪𝓸😼𝔁𝓲𝓪𝓸👣
have🤔you😒ever😔been😡snaked🐍by🙃a🤨 friend👧then😪just😾for 🤦the🗣️clout👀they'll😈do😣it😕again🙄
i😱cUt😳mY🤡fInGeR💗oN🙄mY😞mOmS😅rInG👿i 💅hOpE💔i✌🏼cAn😘sTilL😇dAnCe😣
it’s😌jesus✝️say🗣hello👋jesus✝️B̷̻̄Ö̸̤͙͚̰̈́A̷̹͊̓Ḩ̸̥̼̥̅̈H̶̗̯͇ yeah😏, city🏬! Sity won🏅, shity too🌚, city treee🌲, city for🐚, city fye🔥, I never stanky bye🙋🏿‍♀️! Yeah🚼 heyyyyy! 😫
Farting 💨 is🚶 so💇‍♂️ funny🤣releasing 😝 flatulence 😤 is🌙 definitely 🤪 humourous 🙉 it ⛲ releases🧐 endorphins💅in🤤 my😃 brain🧠this🚱 making🤭me✌️laugh🤣
THIS 😌 SCHOOL 🙉 IS 👀 MINE 😡 I 🗿 AM ✨ THE 😍 KING 👑 KOKICHI 🐭 OUMA↪️
I😏will👨🏽‍✈️sacrifice✈️my⚔️own🥄life⚰️for😈Pakistan🇵🇰🍇🔫
chicken 🐓 wing chicken 🐓🐣 wing hotdog and baloney chicken 🐓 and 😈 macaroni chillin ❄❄ with 💘 my 😋😎 homies 🏾
🙅‍♀️ Frick meat lovers 🙅‍♀️😡🚫 All my homies 👯‍♂️ eat the grass 😩 from the central plains 😝😏🌿🌱
I 👈 put 😏 my 🌠😤 😫🧀 right 🏿🙀 👌 foot 👞👣 in 🚪😋 and 😲 🚨🤷 take my right ✔ ✅ foot 👞 out 🅱🤔 🏎 then 😝👱 😥 put 🔥🏻 my 👧 👖🗼 left 🍒 🍒👈 foot in and 🏿✊ shake 🤝🤝 🤝 it 💯😩 all 🥜💯 💯 about. 💦💦
Imagine 💭💡 your 👏 card 💳 declines ⛔👎 at 😂 the 👏💦 tattoo 💉👨‍🎨 shop 🏬 and ➕🍽 they bust 💣🕐 out 💯 the 👏 sand ⛱ paper.. 😳🤦
Rawr🐲🐊 x3😋 nuzzles how are you😉🙂 pounces on you😛 you’re😃 so😄 warm🤒😈 o3o😏 notices😯 you have a bulge🍆 o:😯😮 someone’s happy😃 ;)😉😜 nuzzles your necky wecky😈😗~ murr~ hehehe😊 rubbies👋🤚 your bulgy🍆 wolgy you’re😌 so big😯😮 :oooo rubbies👋🤚 more on your bulgy🍆 wolgy it🚫 doesn’t stop🛑 growing ·///· 😐kisses😚😘 yo
I 👤didn't 🐈 fuck 🤬 my 👽 cat. I 🌸 didn't 👁 cum 💦 on 😳 my 💋cat. 😻 I 🧒 didn't 💋 put 👸 my 🌈 dick 🍆 anywhere 🧚‍♀️ near 🍺 my cat. 😽 I've ❌ never 😡 done 👉👌 anything 🏀 weird 🧘‍♂️ to 🎨 my 🏅cat. 😸
🌽come🌽today🌽and🌽get🌽some🌽Ć̷̭͚̟̱́ö̷̺̻̙͔́̄͑̚͜r̵̢̢̲̖͍̊̏̎̄n̵̡̧̹̥͖͘🌽or🌽we🌽will🌽sacrifice🌽your🌽n̴̡̪̈́̆͝͝ę̵̠̝̣̒́w̷̧͔̓͝ḅ̴̳̍̀͑o̷̯͈͔̽ŕ̷̡͇̦̯́n̷̝̦
my✨vâğîñå💕is🦋named🗿řōńàłð💋and🐬theres😹nothing😼you👋🏽can👁️do👂about🧚‍♀️it
bəąňß✨bəąňß🌞bəąňß⭕️bəąňß👣bəąňß😳bəąňß💕bəąňß❌bəąňß⛽️bəąňß☁bəąňß🥌bəąňß🖲
Ever 😆see 😱 me 👊 fighting 👍🏾in 💖a 🍯Forest🌲with✌🏾a 😠 grizzly🐻Bear? 👄HELP 💔THE😔BEAR💯
ӨЦΛΛΛΛ 🗿 Λ Λ Λ Λ Λ 🗿 ӨЦΛΛΛΛ 🗿 Λ Λ Λ Λ Λ 🗿 ӨЦΛΛΛΛ 🗿 Λ Λ Λ Λ Λ 🗿
oh 😮 geez 🙊 what 😟 a 🧚‍♀️steep 📉 hill 🏞 i👀 sure 🤖 hope 🙏🏼 i 🌱 dont 🚫 drop 💨 my 🤭 beans 🥫 woah �� aragahha 😖 my ☠️ beannns 😫
I 😌 was 🤡 a 🤨 girl 👩 in✨a 🏠 village😑doin🤓alright 😳 then 😵 i 👹 became 👀 a 🧚‍♀️ princess 👑 overnight 😴
the 👄 name 🙈 game 👩 JUDY👾 judy🌶 judy💞bo 🎶 budy 🎵 boanna 💅 fanna💋fo🎂fudy🌈fe🌂
👽⟟⏁⋉⟒👽⟒⋔⍜⊑👽⍀⏃⏁⏃⌿⏃⍀⏃⟒👽⎅⍜⍀⟟⋔⟒👽⏃⋔⎍⋔⎍👽⏃⋔⟒⋏⍜👽⍀⏃⏁⟒⎅⏃⟒👽⌰⏃⏁⟒⟒⎅⏃⟒👽⋔⍜⟒👽⎅⍜⍀⟟⋔⟒👽⏃⋔⟒⋏⍜👽⍜⌰⋔⟒⋏⏃👽⎅⟒⌿⏃⎅⏃⍀⟟👽⏃⋔⟒⋏⍜👽 ⎅⟟⋔⟒⎅⏃⟒👽
säçrįfïćë👹säćrîfįčé👹sáćrįfîčé👹sàčrìfîçë👹 sâćrìfïčê👹sâçrīfïçë👹sâćrìfįčê👹säçrîfįćę👹
yæw 💕 yãêw ✨ yàáw 😻 yaw 👁 yãēw 🗿 yåėw 😬 yąęw 💅 yæ 🚿
this😚is😿the👄best🤪burrito🌯i’ve🤩ever♦️eaten💞yum🔓yum🗿yum😢
I 😳 don’t 💕 see😌 how 👁 you 👽 can🤦‍♂️hate 😜 from🧚‍♀️my ✨ side👄 of 🖤 the😈 club😹 you 🗣 cant👅 even 💅 get 🕴🏽in 💞 💁‍♀️
ÿoú tákë thę mœn🌚ÿøū👁takê thė šüń🌝yōu täkè 𝖾⋁𝖾𝖗𐒦tꜧĺ𝛈𝚐✨thät sèе𝙢Ꚃ lïkè 𝗳𝑢በ😹ÝƯ ştΐṛ〰️ï𝙩 𝐚ʟʟ ƯᎮ án wꜧ𝚎ņ🕑ÝỨṛ𝚎 ᵭņ𝚎 ṛᥲԂԂᥲ😝ṛṛᥲԂԂa
Hi, 🤚 you're on a rock 🗿 floating in space. 🌖 pretty cool, 😎👍 huh? 😕❔ some of it's water. 🤽‍♂️ fuck it. 🚮 actually, most of it's water 💦 ⛲ i 😀 can't even 🌒 get 🉐 from here 📍 to there without buying 🛍 a boat. ⛴⚓ it's sad. 🙍 i'm sad. 🙁😭 I miss you.
its 😔 gluten 💡 free 😰 ion 🤬 care 🤖 if its 👎 free 🎁 swear 👁 on ur 👱‍♀️fucking 𝙔𝙀𝙀𝙕𝙔𝙎 ⛸⛸ if you 👤 wanna fight 🤬 we🙎 gon 👄fight 👎🏽you 🦁 tryna 😠 be 🐝 on worldstar ⭐️ what ⁉️ you ✊ gonna 📹 record 🤳 it 🙊 yea 😼 i got🚶‍♂️ my 🙇 dollar 💵 store 🏬 camera 📸 *on* ✅ 𝙒𝙃𝘼𝙏𝙎 👀 𝙏𝙃𝙀 👁𝙁𝙐𝘾𝙆𝙄𝙉 😼 𝙎𝙄𝙏𝙐𝘼𝙏𝙄𝙊𝙉𝙉𝙉 ✨✨the 😼 fuck 🤬 do 👏 you 👿 want ⁉️im ⭐️ the 🚶‍♂️ motherfuckin💎M̸̦͔̜̖̳̼͚̱͚̮͍̱̘̰̲͂̃̚A̴̧̢̮̫̼̟̳̭̩̪̟̾̋́̌̀̔͐͒̔̾͗̚͜͝͝N̴̫̭͇̹̍́̾̿͒̈́́̄̏A̵͚͓̥̿̍͊͛̎̂̀̀͠͠Ǵ̴̖̭̭̺̣̭̺̈́̅̏́̓͜ͅÈ̷́͠R̶̖͈͈͐͜❗️❗️at the 💢 bread 🍞 store ❓𝘽𝙍𝙀𝘼𝘿 tell 🤖 him 🗣 to take 👌 the 😾 motherfuckin 🤡 gluten 😷 𝙤𝙪𝙩 🙅‍♀️ 𝙏𝙃𝙀 𝘽𝙍𝙀𝘼𝘿 🥖 imma 🧚 need 🤚 you 👶 to shut 🔇 that 💪 bullshit 👄 up 👆 chief 💂‍♀️ we 👬 cant 🙅 take 👌 shit out 👾 the 😷 bread 🍞 why❓ put 👿 it in 🤲 in 👁 the 👅 first 1️⃣ place🚪 i 🧑‍🎨 know 🧠 yall 💢 𝙨𝙢𝙤𝙠𝙞𝙣 🚬 that 👉 𝙥𝙖𝙘𝙠 💅
A🌑 duck walked🚤👳🏽 up↪️ to📵 a🍉 lemonade stand And💘 he📮 said🏰👸🏼 to📰 the man,👏🏻 running🐖 the👋🏿💿💕 stand "Hey! (Bum🚵🏼 bum🎓 bum)💦 Got😁 any🕗🆖 grapes?" The👦🏻✔️👲🏼 man⏫ said "No😪 we📂 just🚥 sell🐣 lemonade. But👨‍👨‍👦‍👦📀 it's cold And👧🏾🔣 it's👌 fresh And🔳🌕🚿👆🏾 it's all home-made.🙆🏽🛀 Can🍍 I get🚥📅 you Glass?" The duck said, "I'll👣 pass". Then👃🏻 he waddled👵🏻 away. (Waddle🌂 waddle) 'Til😢👒 the💂🏻😐🙅🏿 very📍 next♊️ day. (Bum bum bum👳🏾😇 bum👮🏿🌜 ba-bada-dum)🕐👮🏽
Shawty’s💖✨like🌟😌a⌛️👑✨melody💞🎀🌟 🪐That💫 I 🌏can't 🌍keep 🌵out 🌟Got 🌟me ✨singin' ⚡️like⚡️ 🔥Na na na na 🔥everyday🌪 It's🌈 like ☀️my 💫iPod ❄️stuck 🏚on 🤠replay, 🤤replay-ay-ay-ay🦁 Shawty's🤤 like 🤖a 🤑melody 😻in 😽my 🤲head🧠 That 🤚I 💢can't 💋keep 💄out👀 Got 🤙me 🙏singin' 🙏like👅 Na na na na 💄everyday💋 ⌚It's 💎like 💪my 📱iPod 👋stuck 👋on 🖖replay, 🤚Deluga 🤘Heights (replay) 🤟Hey ✊🏾over 👏and 🤝over 👐o_O ||if 👁I'm 🆓tipsy🔰 or ♻️sober💯 I 💖got ❤️lil' 💔momma💗 on 💝rewind❣️like the ❤️deck 👥in 😻my 😺Rover 👾On 💀my 🤑mind, 🗿shawty☁ fine, 😯meditate 🤒her 👩 like 🧘‍♀️ 🤒So 🤕down 🤐on 😵the 🙄line 😤make 👉me 👈want 👍🏾a 😈cold 👹soda👺 👻Hey 👽baby 🤡be 🤤my 😈radio 📻 😶Hear👂you ✨ everywhere 😏I 😉go 🙂Music 👩‍❤️‍👨in 😇my 😚head🤪 🤨Know 😋your 🤪melody 🤩in 😔every 😭note😏 Girl 😍you 😍incredible😚 🤪Make 🤩yourself 🗿available😏Na na na na🤪 😘That 🎶tune 😚so 😊exceptional☺️ 😍Smexy 😍like 💗a 😚piano 👸give 💥you ♉️my 👩🏿‍✋ hands 👀if ✊🏾you're 😈ready💀 ✨We 😜can 😀make 🙃plans😚 get🗿 body 😋stand😍 if ✊🏾you let ☄️me😩 Girl I'm a…😳
Shawty 👄 had 👉 them 💯 apple 🍎 bottom 🔽 jeans 👖 boots 👢 with *️⃣ the 🔟 fur 🐈 (with *️⃣ the 🔟 fur 🐈) got 🐲 the 🔟 whole 🙄 club 💒 looking 👀 at ☮️ her 👠 she 💃 hit 👊 the 🔟 floor 🔽 (she 💃 hit 👊 the 🔟 floor 🔽) next 👉 thing ♈️ you 👤 shawty 👄 got 👣 low 🔽 low 🔽 low 🔽 low 🔽 low 🔽 low 🔽 low 🔽low 🔽 them 🦮 baggy 👜 sweatpants 🩳 and ➕ the 👁‍🗨 Reeboks 👟 with ➕ the 🎶 straps ↩️ (with ➕ the 🎶 straps ↩️) she 💃 turned 😛around ↩️ and 👊 gave ✌️ that 👁 big 🥵booty 🍑 a 🌶 smack ✨ she 💃 hit 👊 the 🔟 floor 🔽 (she 💃 hit 👊 the 🔟 floor 🔽) next 👉 thing ♈️ you 👤 shawty 👄 got 👣 low 🔽 low 🔽 low 🔽 low 🔽 low 🔽 low 🔽 low 🔽low 🔽
Today 📅 my 12 😣🕛 year 📅 old 👴 son 👦 and I 👥 walked 🚶 into harvard 👩‍🎓 to sign 🚧 him 👴 up ☝ for college 🚌📚. The dean rudly asked ❓ what a 12 😣🕛 year 🗓 old 👴 was doing signing 🖊 up ⬆ for such a prestigious 🎖🏆 institute like 👍 harvard 👩‍🎓. My son 🙎‍♂️ took 👫 of to reveal 💡 his 🤦 Rick 👨🏻‍🔬 and Morty 😡😵 shirt 👕 and proclaimed "Well 🖕🖕🏻🖕🏿 you 👆 see 👁 sir 🤔 I 👁 watch 👁 Rick 🥒 and Morty 😡😵". A look 👀 of confusion ❓🤔 came 💦 over 😳🙊💦 the deans face 😀 and I 👁 have never 🚫 been so proud 😤. The dean quickly ⚡ made 👉 sure 💯 to appologize to my son 👦 but 👆🍑👀 it was too late 💤, the police 👮‍♂️ rushed 🏃‍♂️ in and dragged him 👨🏾 out. My son 👦 passed 📆 all 🙌 his 🤦 classes 📒 with 4.0s and graduated 🔝 top 🔝 of his 🤦 class 📒 in the first 🥇 day 📅 of college 🏘👱📚.
Number🔢 1️⃣5️⃣: 🅱️urger🍔 Ki🆖🤴 foot👣 lettuce🥗. The last🥉 thing you'd👉 want in👇 your👉 🅱️urger🍔 Ki🆖🤴 🅱️urger🍔 is someone's👤 foot👣 fu🆖us🤢🤮. 🅱️ut🍑 as🍑 it turns↩️ out, that might 🅱️e what you👉 get. A 4️⃣channer🍀👤 uploaded a 🅿️hoto📷📸 🅰️nonymously👤❓ to the site showcasing his🚹 feet👣 in👇 a 🅿️lastic bin🚮 of lettuce🥗🤮. With the statement🗣: "This👇 is the lettuce🥗 you👉 eat 🅰️t 🅱️urger🍔 Ki🆖🤴."😱😱 🅰️dmittedly, he🚹 had shoes👣👟 on. But🍑 that's even🤭 worse😱😷. The 🅿️ost went live at 1️⃣1️⃣:3️⃣8️⃣ PM on July🎆🎇 1️⃣6️⃣, and a mere 2️⃣0️⃣ minutes🕤 later, the 🅱️urger🍔 Ki🆖🤴 in👇 question❓ was 🅰️lerted👂 to the rogue👤 employee👤. At least, I👁 hope he's🚹 rogue. How😨 did it🤔 happen🧐🧐? Well, the 🅱️K🍔🤴 employee👤 hadn't🚫 removed❌ the Exif data🤓 from the uploaded photo📷📸, which suggested👀 the culprit👤 was somewhere in👇 Mayfield Heights, Ohio🇺🇸. This was 🅰️t 1️⃣1️⃣:4️⃣7️⃣. 3️⃣ minutes later🕘 at 1️⃣1️⃣:5️⃣0️⃣, the 🅱️urger🍔 Ki🆖🤴 branch🌳 address📭🏠 was 🅿️osted with wishes🙏 of happy😄😁 unemployment😨😰. 5️⃣ minutes later🕚, the news stati🔛 was contacted🗣📞 🅱️y 🅰️nother 4️⃣channer👤🍀. And 3️⃣ minutes🕒 later, at 1️⃣1️⃣:5️⃣8️⃣, a link was 🅿️osted: 🅱️K's🍔🤴 "Tell us 🆎out us" online🌐 forum. The foot👣 🅿️hoto📷📸, otherwise known as🍑 exhibit 🅰️, was 🅰️ttached. Cleveland🇺🇸 Scene Maga🇺🇸zine contacted🗣☎️ the 🅱️K🍔🤴 in👇 question🤔❓ the next⏩ day🌞. When questioned🤔❓🧐, the breakfast🌞🍽 shift manager🧔 said "Oh, I👁 know😱 who🤔 that is. He's🚹 getti🆖 fired💥🔫🔥." Mystery🧐 solved👍, 🅱️y 4️⃣chan🍀👥. Now we👥 can🛢 all go 🔙 to2️⃣ eati🆖🍽 our fast🏃‍♂️💨 food🍔🍟🥤 in👇 🅿️eace☮️😀😃😁👍.
im 😂 not gonna 😻 show 👈📺 you 🤙 🤖 the 🍁🌷 facts 📚 📚 and 👏👏 💰 the 👑⚕ 🏽 evidence 📰 🔨📃 beacuse im 😂 😂😂 29 fucking ♀😡 🎮 years 📅📅 old 🍆 and 💻 🌬 in 👄📥 not ⚠🤚 gonna ♂ sit down ⬇👇 and ➕👏 💰 make 💰 🖕 a video ♀📹 📹📸 with 👏👈 👩😫 screenshots exposing 👐 👐 my bullies 😎🖕 🖕😎 these 🈴 💁🚟 are 🏾 👏🏼 bullies these 🤤 are 🏿 highschool fucking 🙏 bullies and 🍀 👏📡 they 👥 👈 wanna 🙇❤ come at 😍👸 👅 me ❓ 📩✌ and 👏🍞 🅱🏼 say 😅🚃 ✋ your ⬅ 👏👏 29 years 📅 old how 👏⚖ your 🍆🏻 👉 acting fuck 😤👦 🍆 you 👆 your 🍆 🙄 in 👏 〽 your 😩 fucking 👉🍆 30s almost 😲 👀😲 all 💯 of 💦📆 😤 you 😤 😘👆 attacking ♂ ♂ me 🏿😭 👈 and 👏😵 😭 im 👌 👌 not ♂🚫 saying 🗣😡 a fucking 👉 work 🏢 🔨 to 🙅 💦 anybody and 👏 👏🙏 your 💯👉 going to 💦 👆💰 say 🤐 🏿 im 👀 😂🏻 panting myself 🔪 👩🐱 as the 🔝👏 🕘⚕ victim and 👏💦 im 👌😂 trying 😔 to ask 🤗😩 😥🙋 for 💰👨 attention i 😂👀 have 👏🏋 😤💰 not 🚫🙅 said 💖 😑 a 👌😂 fucking 😛💞 👈 word 🔚🔚 ✊ publicly until 💦 🅱 another 👯👣 video 🎥 📹 was ☠ 💯👏 made 💰😶 👆 about me 😩👤 the 👏 🅱👏 week 📅 ❗😱 i was 👏👏 👏 putting 💯💯 out 💰▶ 🏼🏍 my 👨 fucking EP you 👉💬 😭👧 wanna ❤ 😻🏿 ghost 👻👻 👻👻 the 🕸 internet 🌐💻 for 😎🍆 five 🕔 fucking ➡ months 🏽 and ✝ im 😂 promoting ↗ my 😩 😘 project ↗ like 😏❤ 😄 crazy and 😇👏 ➕👏 your 👏 ☝ gonna 👏🅱 🔥 put 😏 my 👨 name 📛 in your fucking 🎮😫 🖕🍑 thumbnail bringing up ❤✋ a 🅰💰 🏠 fucking 🚟 ➡ dramatic lie 💬❎ ❎😱 a hate 💯💯 campaign that 🦃 🔪 you fucking started 😁 🙄 5 👪 🛐 months ✌📆 🙄🏽 you 🏻👏 dont 😡🙅 👀 post 🏾📌 🗒🙄 but 🤤 💏🍑 im 👌🅱 posting a 💰☝ 💰 project ⬆⬅ ⬅⬆ and 👏👏 you 🤖🅱 have 💪👏 👏 to say 🗣🗣
You 👆 useless 👩🏻 piece 🗿 of shit 💩. You 👆 absolute 💯 waste 😵 of space ⭐⚫ and air 🌬. You 👆 uneducated, ignorant 👌, idiotic 😜 dumb 🤪 swine 🐽😂, you’re an absolute 💯 embarrassment 😣 to humanity 🕴 and all 🤠 life 💓 as a whole 🕳. The magnitude 🔍 of your 👉 failure 👎🏽 just now is so indescribably massive 🐘 that one ☝🏻 hundred 💯 years 📅 into the future 👨🏼 your 👉🏿 name 🏷 will be used ♦ as moniker of evil 😈 for heretics. Even 🌃 if all 💪 of humanity 🕴 put 👏 together 👮‍♂️🐕 their collective intelligence 🧐 there is no 🚫 conceivable way ↕ they could have thought 🤔 up ☝ a way ↕ to fuck 🤬 up ⬆ on the unimaginable scale ⚖ you 👉🏻 just did
How 🤷🏻 ba-a-a-ad 🤡👺👹 can 🛢 I 👉👁👄👁 be? 🐝🐝I'm 💁🏻‍♂️just🤷🏻doin'🙆🏻‍♂️what comes ☀️🌈✨𝓃𝒶𝓉𝓊𝓇𝒶𝓁𝓁𝓎✨🌈☀️How💁🏻‍♂️ba-a-a-ad🤡👺👹can🛢I 👉🤡be? 🐝🐝 I'm💁🏻‍♂️just 🤷🏻following👉➡️➡️my ➡️➡️🎀 𝒹𝑒𝓈𝓉𝒾𝓃𝓎 🎀 How🤷🏻ba-a-a-ad🤡👺👹can🛢I👉🏿be? 🐝🐝 I'm💁🏻‍♂️just🤷🏻doin'🙆🏻‍♂️what comes ☀️🌈✨ 𝓃𝒶𝓉𝓊𝓇𝒶𝓁𝓁𝓎 ✨🌈☀️ How🤷🏻ba-a-a-ad 🤡👺👹 can🛢I👉👹be? 🐝🐝How 🤷🏻💁🏻‍♂️bad🥵👺💁🏻‍♂️can🛢💁🏻‍♂️I 💁🏻‍♂️possibly🙋🏻‍♂️be?💁🏻‍♂️🐝🐝Well, 🤷🏻 there's a principal 💡⏳of nature 🙈🙉🙊(principal of nature) 🗣👥🙋🏻‍♂️🙋🏻‍♀️🙋🏻That almost👌every 🐶🐱🐭🐮 creature🐹🐰🐯🐸 knows💡💡Called survival🏋🏻🤸🏻‍♀️of the fittest💪🏻💪🏾 (survival of the fittest) 🗣👥🙋🏻‍♂️ 🙋🏻‍♀️🙋🏻And check✅it ➡️this is how it goes🚶🏻🚶🏻‍♀️The animal🙈🙉🙊that eats🍌gotta🤼 scratch🏋️and 👄bite 🦁and💪punch🤼And the🐷🐨animal🐥🦇 that doesn't, well the 🐼🦁animal🦉🐙that doesn't, winds🔁 up🆙⬆️Someone else's 💁🏻‍♂️💁🏽‍♂️💁🏿‍♂️🙋🏻🙋🏼🙋🏽🙋🏾‍♀️lu-🍔lu-🥙lu-🌮lu-🥪lunch!🍱(Munch Munch Munch Munch Munch👁👅👁) 🗣👥🙋🏻‍♂️🙋🏻‍♀️🙋🏻I'm just saying'...💁🏻‍♂️
𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓻𝓮𝓼🌙a 🙄𝘣𝘶𝘻𝘻🐝𝘣𝘶𝘻𝘻🤣 buzz✨ïṅ 😨m̸e̸a̸d̸o̸w̸🤷🏻‍♀️t⃨h⃨e⃨r⃨e⃨s⃨👾ᗩ😈ꌃꀎꁴꁴ💩 🐝乃ㄩ乙乙😂【b】【u】【z】【z】💕 b̆̈ŭ̈z̆̈z̆̈🌹the 😅 ፕዪቿ̂🌳Շɦεɼε��😣a 🤯b̶u̶z̶z̶👽 b̠u̠z̠z̠🤖 ḃu̇żż👻ᏰᏬፚፚ 💀in 👃the😷 ᶠˡᵒʷᵉʳˢ🌺ꅐꏂꋪꏂ😹so 🤟乃ㄩ丂ㄚ🗣 b̑̈ȇ̈ȋ̈n̑̈g̑̈👓᥇ꪊɀɀꪊꪗ🥽b͛e͛e͛z͛ 👁ẇєяє👄ɓմςςψ 🗿ℬUℤℤℐℕᎶ🌿with🐚♭ṳℨℨ♭ḙḙ✺🥓bͦͯuͦͯzͦͯzͦͯbͦͯeͦͯeͦͯ🌍is 🌟b˟˚u˟˚s˟˚y˟˚🎰with 🧠m͙e͙🐽Ᏺᾀᑬᑬẙ😀 as 😉a સଇกกϓ Ъ૯૯🍯 can 🙇‍♂️be🧚🏻 w̤̮e̤̮r̤̮e̤̮🦷βUSΨ😴b̾u̾z̾z̾i̾n̾g̾🤐with 🤡b⃠u⃠z⃠z⃠b⃠e⃠e⃠👺 t̺͆h̺͆e̺͆🎃ṧ✺ℵ🌞!✘a͎l͎w͎a͎y͎s͎🦄s͜͡h͜͡i͜͡n͜͡i͜͡n͜͡g͜͡👨‍🦳🄸🅃🅂🧒great😖t̶o̶😪b͟e͟👐🏻ḁͦl̥ͦi̥ͦv̥ͦe̥ͦ🔪 ሠዘቿክ💄you’re ♭ʊʐʐ😻βUZZ😮ℬʉᏃᏃ🐣乃∪乙乙🥶Ъμzz😸b˟˚u˟˚z˟˚z˟˚i˟˚n˟˚g˟˚🤬ᏜᎥʈ⋆🤧ЪμzzЪ૯૯🤔i͓̽n͓̽🚀Ꮖℋℰ👱🏻‍♀️ʰⁱᵛᵉ🍟
I 👁 don't 🚫👎 know 💭 what 😂 I 💰💰 was 👏👏 thinking 🤔 Leaving 🚪🍃 my 👨🌭 child 👾 behind 👟☢ Now 🎅🙅 I suffer 😱😤 the 👏🔝 curse ⛓ Knowing 💭🤔 now 😭🤗 I 🤠 am blind With all 👩😩 this anger, 😡 guilt and sadness Coming 🏻🏃 to 😷 haunt me 👸 forever 🕜 I can't 🔫 wait for the cliff 💦 at 🗽 the end of 💦 the 🦉👑 river Is 😤 this revenge I am seeking Or seeking someone 👥👤 to 💦 avenge me Stuck in 〽👏 my 🏻 own 😎🏻 paradox I 👀👨 wanna ♀ set ➿ myself free Maybe I 😏 should 👑 chase and 👏 find 🔦 Before they'll 👧 try 😐 to 💦 stop ⛔ it 💯 It won't be 🍆💚 long before 🐝🔙 I'll 😩 become 🏽 a 🆒 puppet It's been 🥜 so long 🔨 Since I last have seen 👁 my ♂ son 👦 Lost to 💰 this monster 👹 To 🍅 the 🍁 man ♂ behind the slaughter Since you've been 📹 gone 😠😡 I've been 🚟👦 singing this 🏿 stupid song 🎵🎤 So I 👨 could 👌✊ ponder The 😫 sanity of 💦🔴 your mother I 👟👏 wish 😢😢 I 💯😎 lived in 👉 the 👏😈 present With the 😫👏 gift 🍆 of 🚋🤔 my 💋🤔 past mistakes But the 🌜 future 💞 keeps luring in ❤🍆 like 👏💖 a pack of snakes Your 🙄👉 sweet 🍬 little 🐭 eyes 👀👀 Your 👨👉 little 🏽 smile, ⭐😁 is 💦 all I 🏻 remember Those fuzzy memories mess with 👌 my temper Justification is killing me But killing 🔪 isn't justified What happened 🤔🤔 to 💯♀ my 💝 son, ♂👦 I'm terrified 😲😲 It 😳 lingers in 👇 my 💩💪 mind And 🌰👏 the 🏻 thought 🤔🤔 keeps on getting 💦 bigger I'm 😻 sorry my 👬 sweet 🍬 baby 👦👶 I 👀♂ wish I've 🏾😭 been there 💦✔ It's 😠🍝 been ✊😎 so 😮 long 🕑📏 Since 💦💦 I 🤔🙋 last 🕞❗ have 😑 seen 👀👁 my 😤 son 🏻👦 Lost 🍆 to 💦 this monster 👹👹 To 😉 the 👏👏 man 💂 behind ↩ the 😂🚗 slaughter Since 💦💦 you've been 🤤😎 gone 😭 I've 😠 been 👑 singing 👩 this 💋 stupid song 🎵🎵 So I could 🚫 ponder The sanity of your mother
What the 🅾🔪 fuck 👌🍑 did 🌼 you 👏👉 just 👏 fucking 🏻⚔ say 🗣🎙 about ✨💦 me, you 👧💦 little 🍑😫 bitch? 🐩☘ I'll 💵🤢 have you know 👏 I 💬♀ graduated 💯 top 👚🔼 of my 🖥👌 class 🥇😛 in 🏢 the 👏 Navy Seals, and I've been 🥜💫 involved in ⏳ numerous secret raids 👈👤 on Al-Quaeda, 🍒🅾 and 💰🌈 I 💰👁 have 🎁 over 😈♂ 300 confirmed kills. ☠ I am trained 🏻🏻 in gorilla warfare 💣 and I'm 🚫 the 😱 top 🔝🔼 sniper in the 👩 entire 😂🏼 US armed forces. 🍆 You are 🏃 nothing to 🅱🗝 me but just 👏 another 🔁 target. I 👁👣 will 🅱💰 wipe 🤤 you 😤😑 the 👏 fuck 🏻 out 🍻 with 👏😏 precision the 🌫😫 likes of which 👏 has 👏 never 😤 been 📷👏 seen 👁 before ⬅💰 on 🤤 this 👈 Earth, 🌎🌎 mark ✌ my 👯🕶 fucking ➡👉 words. You ❌❤ think 😠🤔 you 👈 can 💦 get away with 👩👏 saying 💬🗣 that shit 👌👻 to ✌🅱 me over the Internet? 🌐 Think again, fucker. ➡ As 🍑🍑 we 🏼🤝 speak I 👀👈 am contacting 📞👈 my 😽 secret 😱😱 network of spies across 👉 the 📉 USA 💖 and 🥁 your 👉👉 IP is 👉💦 being traced 📈 right ❤ now 👋 so 😴 you better 🤔😚 prepare 👉 for the 👏🎆 storm, maggot. The storm 🌀 that 🍆👏 wipes out the 👌🔥 pathetic 😂👋 little 👩 thing you call 📱 your life. You're 👈 fucking 💯 dead, 🔥😂 kid. 😎👶 I 👁👁 can 💦 be anywhere, anytime, 👉💵 and ♂😫 I 👏 can 🔫🔫 kill 👻🔫 you 😏😏 in ⬅👏 over 😳😈 seven hundred ways, and that's 👆 just with 😉😗 my 👍🆕 bare hands. 👏 Not 👏♀ only 😤 am 👦💦 I 😶 extensively trained 👨🏻 in 💊👇 unarmed combat, 🗡 but I 👩😍 have 😑 access 🔖 to the 👏 entire 👏🙋 arsenal of 👨 the 👍👏 United States 👌 Marine Corps and 📡👏 I will 💦 use it to its full 🈵🌕 extent to wipe your 🏻👏 miserable ass 🍑🍆 off 😡👏 the 👏 face of 💦❤ the continent, 👤 you 👨👈 little 👌 shit. 🎃💖 If 🤥 only you could have known 💫 what 😧 unholy 🙏 retribution your 👏 little 🏼 "clever" comment was about 🎩⭐ to ⚠ bring ➡⬅ down ⬇ upon you, maybe 😿 you ♀ would have 👏 held ✊ your 👈👈 fucking 💯 tongue. 👅 But 🏼 you couldn't, you didn't, 😘 and 💯 now 🎅🔫 you're paying the price, you 🙄🖕 goddamn idiot. I 👁🅱 will 😘 shit 👌 fury 😡😡 all over you 🤓👉 and 💰 you will 👏 drown in it. You're 😊🤖 fucking dead, kiddo. 🔥💲
Submitted September 18, 2020 at 11:56AM by Putins-Uncle via reddit https://ift.tt/2RESOdY
1 note · View note
Text
Today’s foods x2
Didn’t post yesterday so I’ll add that too. Gained weight I think... 5 days in a row now? Despite not even netting any calories at all most days. I know it’s water weight, I know, but it will not go away. I’m beyond dismayed. I had lost 6 lbs and now I’m back over my starting weight. 142 was my highest this week and it looks like things are about to get a bit unhealthy :) :) :) I’m not working the next three days so I can restrict more freely and not worry about having the energy for a high pace retail job. Still trying to cut back on salt but having trouble dealing with cravings for it in this hot weather.
7/2/20 foods:
Breakfast
Brewed coffee (I think it was Green Mountain brand Dark Magic Keurig with a splash of vanilla almond milk and stevia): 15
Peach cup no sugar added: 30
Morning snack
2 Biscoff cookies: 120
Lunch
Ranch flavored tuna packet with extra ranch dressing: 140
Vanilla pudding cup: 100
Afternoon snack
Chocolate belvita pack: 120
Salami and provolone: 440
Dinner
1 cinnamon gummy bear, not worth it: 30
Blueberry pomegranate Ice drink: 0
Apple juice: 80
It was at this point I decided that after 4 straight days of gaining weight, no matter how many calories I ate it wouldn’t matter. I’d had 1075 up until this point, then had: Little Caesar’s zesty cheese bread: 1400
Burned 1392 calories from work, errands, and chores and still had around 18 calories left over for the day even with the cheesy bread. Still managed to gain 1/10th of a pound the following morning.
7/3 weighed in at 138.6
Breakfast
Green Mountain’s Dark Magic coffee, Keurig cup, with some vanilla almond milk, stevia, and caramel syrup: 20
Peanut toffee buzz Clif bar: 260
Lunch
Peach cup: 30
Turkey jerky: 50?
Apple juice: 80
About 12 multigrain crackers with honey almond butter: 130
Vitamin Water dragonfruit energy drink: 0
Lemon pepper tuna: 80
Dinner
2/3 fillet of grilled tilapia: 100
Total calories consumed: 750. Total burned: 1365. Total remaining: 1716.
0 notes