#also I just wanted to experiment with drawing gold so that’s why tails board is like that

[5h0w1sh]

Roblox eating sound effect

[a-simple-imagine]

Run Away With Me

Synopsis: Every moment shared with Charlie Weasley is an adventure all it’s own. How you wish to spend every moment together and all it takes is to run away. 

Pairing: Charlie Weasley x fem!reader

Words: 6.3k+

A/N - Every year I post a story on my birthday and today’s the day I turn a year older. Usually these stories are pretty sad but this year I wrote something a little softer so here is my birthday present for you guys, I hope you enjoy it. 

1. A Stolen Kiss

A bright-eyed and clueless young student, excited to be attending a school of magic. Nobody else in your family had magic so it was a big surprise when you received a letter alongside a weird lady who looked like she just stepped out of the early 1920s. Sat between your parents, the older woman explained the entire situation much to your excitement and your parents' confusion.

 Diagon alley had been your first experience of all things magical; it had been like stepping into another world instead of just any old street in London. There were book shops lined with all kinds of books, some were bigger than your head while others were tiny. A shop that sold weird and kinda gross jars full of who knows what. There was a place that only sold brooms but according to the list you had read like a hundred times, first years weren't allowed their own brooms. You spent what felt like a lifetime at Madam Malkin's Robes for All Occasions getting fitted for robes. Your parents were utterly fascinated by all the different styles and kept asking questions that made the experience so much longer than it really needed to be. You'd never had a pet before, but after a lot of begging they let you pick out a cat; he was a small Persian cat. Not quite a kitten but not quite fully grown. Checking off each item as you went along, you were exhausted by the end of it. There was even enough time for a trip to Florean Fortescue's Ice Cream Parlour where you had enjoyed a cone of strawberries and cream with sprinkles on top. All that was left on your list was a wand. Peeling gold letters rested over the door of a shop that read: Ollivanders: Makers of Fine Wands since 382 B.C. Stepping inside it was a tiny little store with no costumers. Thousands of narrow boxes lined the walls all the way up to the ceiling. It didn't take long for the weird old man to give you a wand that felt warm in your hand. Unlike the other disasters that came at the result of you waving various wands, a stream of red and gold sparks shoot out the end of this one like a mini firework. The wand chooses the wizard whatever the hell that meant. All ready and packed for Hogwarts, you were really giddy to go. Your mother cried as she waved you off to boarding school but you couldn't sit still. The train ride took hours and it was a little lonely considering you didn't know anyone but as soon as you entered the castle you knew it was exactly where you were meant to be. The building was massive and practically oozed magic and mystery through each brick. The pictures, much to your surprise, were moving on their own. Hogwarts had four houses and each student had to sit on a tall stool, put on a funny talking hat which would decide ultimately where they belong.

The very first friend you made was Nymphadora Tonks but only because she was in all of your classes and by some twist of fate you always ended up seated together. She was a sweet girl with pink hair and a talent for mischief. There was never a dull moment with you two. Then there was Charlie Weasley. Ever since that brisk day in October when he had ridden in clumsily on his white horse to save the day, the two of you had been the best of friends. You were still getting used to all your different classes. Potions class, however, was proving the most difficult. Too many ingredients and types to get used to. Not to mention Snape was just... mean. The task had been to prepare a simple Wiggenweld Potion; a powerful healing potion that can be used to heal injuries, or reverse the effects of a Sleeping Draught. The book was open on the desk as you carefully followed the instructions until.... poof. All the confidence you'd gained since arriving disappeared as Snape scolded you in front of everyone for messing up. Charlie had swooped in to take the blame landing himself in late-night detention. On the other hand, you got to leave with your tail between your legs and a few house points shaved off the total. And yet even his small act of kindness wasn't enough to capture your affection at least not at first. For the little version of yourself was infatuated with another Weasley. An older Weasley.

The nerves of a handful of students could be felt by anyone sat in the great hall for breakfast. Tonks is sat beside you running butter over a piece of toast. Stifling a yawn, Charlie takes a seat across from the two of you sporting a jumper of Gryffindor red and gold.

"Good morning," You flash your cheeriest, half-asleep smile bringing your spoon of Cheeri Owls to your lips. "Nervous?"

"A little," He was looking especially pale today suggesting he was more than just a little.

"You should be," Tonks perks up. "It's only the last game of the season and all hope rides on the seeker,"

"No pressure then," Charlie huffs out a dull laugh. The boy excelled in his position as the Gryffindor seeker but there was no way to determine how he'd play today when he was carrying the hopes and dreams of his teammates and entire house.

"You should eat something," You suggest, pushing a bowl of assorted fruit forward. There was little you could to make him feel better except take his spot but that wasn't allowed. You also probably wouldn't be that good. "Might make you feel better?"

"I'm too nervous to eat," He insisted but he still took an apple; rolling the red fruit between his palms.

"Win or lose you're still number one in our heart, right Tonks?" Elbowing her gently, you shovel another spoonful of 'O' shapes into your mouth.

"Sure," she shrugs. "If you want we can jinx the other team's seeker? I've been practising."

"Or... how much time do we have? I can get one of the older students to brew some Felix Felicis." You play along. "Nothing like a little liquid luck to win a game."

"You both know that's not allowed," Charlie took a large bite of his apple.

"When has Tonks ever cared about rules," Sometimes you wish she did care, you probably wouldn't have ended up in detention so many times alongside her.

"Thanks but no," he took another bite. "We have to win fair and square."

The conversation drifted from nerves to lost spells and planned practical jokes. Charlie seemed to relax a little the more he spoke. Maybe all he needed was a distraction to cheer him up.

"We need to take a trip to Hogsmeade" Tonk announces. "I'm out of dungbombs."

"Urgh- you and that silly joke shop." You can't help but roll your eyes but it was all good-natured. Despite hardly ever buying anything yourself, you spent an awful lot of time at Zonko's infamous little joke shop. "I could do with a trip outside the castle though. You should come too Charlie and maybe... you could ask Bill if he wants to come?"

"You're still gushing over Bill," Now it was Tonks turn to elbow you playfully, her lips curling up into a tantalising smirk.

"I do not gush over him," you state firmly, brows knitting together in a frown. You didn't appreciate being made fun. Bill was older, wiser and always made time to show you kindness. He made your little heart flutter whenever you saw him and Tonks took every opportunity to tease you about it. "I just thought It'd be nice is all. Wouldn't you agree, Charlie?"

"If you want him to come, ask him yourself." He responds, taking a large gulp of his juice.

"She won't because she has a crush."

"I don't have a crush Nymphadora- stop it," It was infinitely more embarrassing talking about this with Charlie sat at the table. "Don't ask him then, I don't care."

"Yes you do," Placing her arm around your shoulder, she pulls you into her side. "Because you're in love-"

"I am not!" You snap, pushing out of her grip.

"I'll see you guys later." The two of you share a look as Charlie disappears without another word. It was probably just pregame nerves.

"You know what? I think I'll get some frogspawn soap too and put it in the prefects' bathroom." Typical Tonks.

You'd come to learn through your time at Hogwarts that Quidditch was the most popular sport among wizards. And each house had their own team who compete for a trophy and bragging rights. Today was the final game thankfully. Gryffindor vs. Slytherin. Apparently, it came down to these two a lot. As the Gryffindor team filter out of the changing rooms, you slip inside to find Charlie sitting on a little bench.

"Guess who?" You sing-song, slapping your hands over his eyes but only briefly. He turns to look at you with an almost sour expression.

"What are you doing here?"

"I came to support you," you reply soft, offering a smile he couldn't even see as he turned away.

"You're not supposed to be in here," Had you done something to upset him? Surely not. This was the first time you were seeing him since breakfast so there hadn't been a moment for you to mess things up and yet, his voice held an icy chill.

"Guess Tonks is rubbing off on me?" You jest, looking around the room. It was empty apart from you two. Bags and clothes scattered across benches or half shoved into lockers. A chalkboard stood in the corner with drawings you couldn't understand. "I just wanted to see how you were doing before the big game, is all. We were worried about you."

"You were worried about me," He repeats slowly, looking up at you. "I thought you hated quidditch."

"I still do," Your shoulders rise in a little shrug. "It's silly. Doesn't matter how hard the team works or how many goals it's pretty much all decided by how good the seeker is so why even have goals?"

"Score enough goals before the snitch is caught and anyone could win," He perks up. "You just don't understand how good and exciting it is."

Your lips curl up in appreciation for Charlie Weasley and his love for quidditch. It didn't possess the sparkle that came along when he talks about dragons but it was still nice to see him liven up. "Then go out there and show me how exciting it is,"

You stand under the spotlight of his gaze as he seemingly takes in your choice of attire; wearing the Gryffindor colours with pride to show your support. You even let Tonks paint your face after she promised not to draw genitalia. "Do you really think we're gonna win? What if I mess up and everyone hates me?"

"Then you mess up and everyone hates you," You shrug a little. "But that's not gonna happen and you know why?" His head shakes slowly. "It's because you're the best seeker at this school Charles Weasley." You place your hands on either side of his shoulders. "And I believe in you."

"How does that help me?" With your index finger under his chin, you force him to meet your eyes.

"Because I'm never wrong."

"That doesn't sound right." He tries to look away but you stop him.

"But it is," You offer a reassuring smile; one full of determination. "You've got this Charlie. So come on before you miss the game entirely."

The cheers outside were seemingly growing louder by the second. With a deep breath, Charlie stands up, grabbing his broom. "You're staying to watch, right?"

"Of course. Tonks is up in the stands too." Taking his hand, you lead the way out of the tent. "Consider us your good luck charms." Charlie brings the both of you to an abrupt stop before you even reach the opening of the tent, pulling you back to him. "What's up?"

The peppering of freckles that covered Charlie's face was even more vibrant against the rose pink blush. You squeeze his hand a little hoping it makes him feel better. And then it happens. The crowd grows silent in your ear but only for a moment as Charlie's surprisingly soft lips crash clumsily against yours. "For good luck," his whispers; his hand slipping from yours as he leaves you dumbfounded.

"He okay?" Tonks asks as you return from your trip.

"Yeah... still nervous," You reply, sitting down beside her. "It's his first big game after all."

"Are you okay?" The crowd erupts into cheers as the Gryffindor team flys in first. You're almost too embarrassed to look for Charlie; worried about what you might find so you keep your head down. "You look like you've just seen a troll or something?"

"Mhmm," you hum, forcing yourself to watch the Slytherin team as they enter. Why had Charlie kissed you? Did it mean he liked you or was he just messing around? Your head swirled with possibilities.

"You want a sweet?" Your friend offers as the game finally starts. It takes you a second to register but you smile, reaching into the little bag she was holding only to come to a stop.

"They're not gonna burn my tongue off or something are they?"

"No," Her chuckle sounded a little too innocent but you trust her for some reason. Taking a piece of confectionery out of the paper bag.

"Charlie... kissed me." You announce, throwing the sweet into you mouth; face scrunching up when they turn out to be sour. Ten points to Slytherin as they take the lead.

"He what?"

"He... kissed me."

2. Together

Who was Bill Weasley but a distant playground crush after that day. And your time of classrooms and magic lessons came swiftly to an end; how bittersweet it felt to leave a place you loved dearly. A once naive little girl stepping into the unknown now called the Wizarding World Home. Now you would go on to be a healer which was simply a magical doctor although your parents strongly disagreed with the comparison. However proud they were of you there would always be some part of them that wished you had chosen to become a lawyer or 'real' doctor.

Bathed in the warm embrace of the setting sun, you ponder the tranquility in a bed of green grass. The youngest Weasley lay beside you, struggling to keep still as often children do. She was similar to her brother in that way who now paced back and forth a mere few steps away. The invitation had been for dinner but you arrived a little early. The burrow was always such a welcoming place like stepping into a home you used to live in many moons ago; it was cosy and warm and there was no doubt that many lived there. You found your house to be almost the opposite, it always looked like nobody lived there. Immaculate. Polished. Cold.

"Will you stop pacing, you're making me nervous." You call out to your boyfriend, opening your eyes only to squint at the bright light. "What's wrong with you?"

Charlie comes to a stop as you sit up; Ginny mimics you in sitting up but the boy's eyes stay on you. The longer he stared, the more the pit in your stomach grew; what exactly hid behind his blank expression. He normally possessed such a playful warmth but it seemed to have vanished as of late. Plucking a stray purple flower, you enclose it in the palm of your hands. "You know I love dragons right?"

"Of course," Since meeting him, he had probably managed to slip dragons into every conversation you had ever had. It was at a point where you knew far more about dragons than you ever really cared to know. Many found his obsession annoying because that's what he so obviously was, obsessed but you found it enticing. Charming, even. Opening up your hand, a small butterfly with deep plum-purple wings flutters into the air and onto a giggly Ginny's nose. The innocent glee of a child; how those days were gone for you. "What's that got to do with anything?"

"Promise you won't be mad?" It would be foolish to make such a promise when there was no way to guarantee your reaction. Whatever it was must be bad, if he was this worried. Your shoulders rise a little then fall.

"I make no such promises- just tell me."

Charlie took a breath that travelled on the wind to your ears before he blurted out.  "I'm moving to Romania."

"Okay," Is your first reaction while your brain tries to make sense of something it didn't want to hear. "Wait- what?"

"Charlie is moving away to work with big scary dragons," Ginny announces playfully, baring her little hands like claws.

The once small pit grew into a mighty black hole of uncertainty and sadness that threatened to swallow you whole. There had been conversations shared between friends of Charlie wanting to move away to a foreign land, just to finally see a dragon but you had never taken it at face value. Always so convinced it was but a dream rather like those of when you were little and you wished to be a vampire. Technically back then you didn't know they actually existed but still, even now it was never going to come true. Eyes cast upon the second eldest Weasley, he kicks up the grass with his hands buried in the pockets of his pants. "It's the nearest Dragon reserve."

That was something you already knew but it didn't make the decision, at least in your eyes, any less confusing. Instead, it prompted water to well up in your eyes for this was something that affected not only him and his family but your life too. "I... I don't know what to say,"

"Hey Ginny, can you go check if dinner's ready yet?"

"No- why can't you do it?" The bark behind her words was very in character for the fiesty young Weasley. Blinking away the tears, you plaster on the best smile you can muster.

"If you go check on dinner I promise we can play a game later, okay? Exploding snap maybe?"

"Really?" She eyes you suspicious probably because it was a promise you had broken before. Not always for the right reasons but this time it was genuine. Charlie clearly wanted this to be a private conversation or perhaps he was just saving you for the inevitable moment where she asks why you're crying. Ginny scrambles to feet when you nod and skips off towards the gravity-defying house. It still amazed you that the building hadn't fallen yet. Rising to your feet you brush yourself off.

"You know I want nothing more than to work with Dragons and this is the only way I can do that," There was no mistaking the serious tone that came along with his words. It didn't matter what you said there was no changing his mind but you wouldn't do that anyway. It seemed cruel to even try to get him to give up on something so precious and you would never want to do that to him. "I have an opportunity to do something I love and I won't waste it to get some boring job at the ministry."

"I don't expect you too..." You wanted nothing more than to tell him to stay; beg him even. You were fighting against the selfish little devil that was stabbing you in the heart. It was a dull, deep pain in your chest. You wanted Charlie to follow his dreams, you just never expected them to not include you. "It's just a lot to take in."

"I know," The red-headed boy walks ever so slowly over to you, taking both hands in his. His hands had always felt a little rough ever since Hogwarts. You used to complain back then and insist he needed to moisturise but over time you had grown fond of the familiarity. How you wished this tender moment could last forever because it very well might be your last. You're caught off guard when he yanks you forward. You stumble into his chest where he wraps his arms around you like the big teddy bear he was. You breathe in every inch of him like it was the last time. The intoxicating aroma of an early walk in the woods; that fresh earthy smell that really makes you appreciate where you are. You could almost picture the pine trees.

"I feel like I'm losing you," Your words but a whisper, lost on the breeze.

"You're not," His grip around you tightens and suddenly your in the air, spinning around. "You could never get rid of me that easily.

"Charlie," You fight back a smile as you return to the ground; burying your face in the nook of his neck. "What's gonna happen to us?"

"About that-"

"Because I don't know if I can do the whole long-distance thing? So do we break up?" The tears threaten to fall once again as you pull back to get a good look at him. You never wanted to forget the emerald of his eyes or each and every freckle that called his body home. The unusual scare that adorned his eyebrow that was always amusing to look at. If that was his true purpose to break up with you then there would be no stopping the tears when they finally burst through the damn.

"No, I-"

"Because that's a little mean Charlie, you could have at least waited until after dinner. Should have done it first actua-"

You words become mumbled by the palm of his hand which he's placed over your mouth like a seal of protection. "Shush for a minute."

It's hard to resist so you simply don't; sticking your tongue you deliberately lick the palm of his hand but it seems to not phase him whatsoever.

"I'm not breaking up with you, silly," You meet his gaze. "I was kind of thinking you could come with me?"

Reaching up, you yank his hand away. "To Romania?  You've got to be joking."

"Why not?"

Did you even know how to answer that? There were so many reasons why one should not just up and leave to go live in a completely different country with the boy they dated through high school. "I can't just up and leave my family- my mum will be devastated."

"I'll talk to her about it," Charlie hums softly, placing a delicate kiss upon your forehead. "Your mum loves me and she wants you to be happy."

"Dinner's Ready," For such a small girl, Ginny had one big mouth. There was no mistaking her call. However, this whole situation now felt a little... off. Could you even sit through dinner without it all becoming weird?

"We're coming," Charlie yells back; offering up his hand which you reluctantly take and he leads the way back to the house. "You want to be a healer right? You could do that in Romania."

"I guess," You weren't exactly worried about not finding a job.

"You don't have to decide right now," He tells you before you have a chance to speak up again. "Just think about it. I mean the invitation is there and for what it's worth, I'd really like you to come."  

3. Creeping doubts

It took a lot of convincing but despite everything you decided to follow Charlie into the Unknown. Your parents weren't thrilled with the decision but they respected it; they were just worried about what would happen if something went wrong. And as their only child, they would obviously miss you. A lot of time was spent at the burrow that summer before moving to Romania; you were beginning to feel like an honorary Weasley only with the experience of having been a muggle for the first eleven years of your life. It was but a three-hour flight to Romania and your mother had sobbed at the airport. It made you think back to your first time stepping onto the Hogwarts express, leaving your parents behind to go to a magical boarding school in Scotland. It was a peculiar thought but a nice one. One you wished to cherish. Now in a foreign land with no support system behind you other than a boy you had been dating for years, you were ready for a new adventure. And there was officially no doubt in your mind that you would do just about anything for Charlie Weasley.

"It's not much," Charlie sets his suitcase down on the table. "Best I could do, for now, I'm afraid."

"It's fine," It was an old apartment in a building full of what you assumed were muggles. There was a small living room area with an ugly pea-coloured couch nestled against one wall. Beside it was a small coffee table and on the other side of the room was a TV, you weren't convinced actually worked. Then there was the kitchen which was attached to the living room. It had a fridge, a cooker and some cupboards. The only other room was a bedroom that literally only housed a bed in at the moment, then there was a door that leads on to the bathroom. It definitely wasn't much but a crappy apartment was just part of the experience, right? At least that's what you were telling yourself. "it'll feel like home soon enough," You had everything you needed to make this place feel like home right in your suitcase; oh the joys of magic. Patting yourself down, you search for the key to easy unpacking. "Uh... have you seen my wand?"

His head shakes and wears an amused grin. "You remembered to bring it right?"

"Yes," you huff. "I was gonna unpack," Falling back against the wall, you slide down onto the floor which you imagine hasn't been cleaned in a while considering the dust. "It's gonna take so long without my wand- which may actually be in the suitcase now that I think about it."

"Did you forget I'm a wizard too?"

"You do it then," You drop your head back against the wall. "I'm starving."

"actually have you seen my wand?"

You giggle to yourself "You're an idiot,"

"Hey- you lost your wand too." His shadow lingers over you as he comes to join you against the wall. Taking up a seat beside you, your head falls to rest against his shoulder.  

"Can we get pizza? I saw some of those leaflets when we came in so we could order some?"

"Whatever you want, my love."

As time ticks on the pizza box is left discarded in the kitchen as the two of you retire for the night. Who knew not actually unpacking but simply thinking about it while eating pizza on the dirty ground could be so much work. You struggle to hold back a yawn as you snuggle up to him trying to absorb as much of his body heat as you can. All that lay across the two of you were a blanket and this building was next exactly the warmest. "Do you think we'll be okay? "You ponder aloud; it was a question that had been on your mind since agreeing to follow him to Romania. For not many people stay together with their high school loves. What if things fall apart now that you're in the 'real' world? What if this was all just a huge mistake?

"What do you mean?" Always such a simple boy; you wonder how he deals with his anxieties. Did he actually not know what you meant or was he merely putting on a brave face? A once proud Gryffindor suggested that he always looked to be brave above anything else.

"Do you think we'll be okay?" You repeat as if that somehow answers his question but it must have done something because even in the darkness you can just tell he's smiling.

"You worry way too much." Charlie laughs.

"You don't worry enough,"

He lays a kiss upon the top of your head, his hand moving up and down your arm. "It used to be the other way around."

"I was young and reckless back then. "How you missed the days where you ran around the halls of Hogwarts with reckless abandon. Well, not entirely reckless that was more Tonks but things had definitely felt simpler back then.

"You're still young and reckless now, I just have to hear you stress about it afterwards." Charlie taunts, pinching your arm. You recoil at the sharp pain.

"Shush."

"Being in Romania doesn't change anything," He expresses; his voice sounding louder in the quiet darkness. "I loved you back home and I still love you now. I'm really glad you decided to come with me."

Hoping to distract yourself from every worrying thought that clouded your brain you decide it's time to change the subject. "Are you nervous about tomorrow?"

"Getting to work with Dragons all day every day? that's like dream come true."

"A dangerous one," Dragons were perhaps the most vicious creatures around other than humans. As captivating as they were and as much as charlie adored them, you couldn't help but worry about his safety. It seemed no matter the topic this evening you'd find a way to stress yourself out.

"I'll be fine, I'll have you there to patch me up," That he will for you had taken on the role as a healer willing to help out with all the injuries that inevitably come from dealing with dragons. You wouldn't admit it but you weren't quite convinced you were up to the task; you had never actually dealt with dragon-related injuries so this was like diving headfirst into the ocean when you only just learned how to swim in a training pool. "and if not- well, we had a good run."

"Don't joke about that," Nuzzling against his chest, you finally let your eyes close. Today was the start of forever with the one and only Charles Weasley and here he was joking about his ultimate demise.

4. The perfect day

It's peculiar how life can just fall into place. Your odd little world of dragons and leaky apartment buildings just became the norm. You had come to love your work at the reserve, Dragons were actually incredibly cool up close. Not to mention getting to see Charlie work with them after years of never shutting up about them was truly a sight to behold. Every day, it was like taking an excited little boy to his first day of school. His eyes simply lit up whenever he was at work although it was hard explaining his injuries to the neighbours when they were being nosey. You also had to be careful when using magic since you were basically living with muggles and it would be a headache if they ever found out.

With your site blocked by a thin piece of fabric, Charlie guides you carefully forward with his hands skillfully placed upon your arms to steer. This was the first day off the two of you have shared in a long time. Little information was given about your destination other than it being a surprise. With Charlie that could mean just about anything which wasn't always a good thing but you trusted him enough to believe he wasn't leading you into a dragon's den or something. A gentle breeze nipped at the skin of your neck and the ground felt soft under your feet. The gentle singing of a symphony of birds filled the air and the sun beamed down with remarkable easy. All this suggested you were somewhere withdrawn in nature. Charlie had always been one for the great outdoors. There were countless times you had found him sneaking in or out of the forbidden forest back at school.

"Am I going to like this surprise?" You inquire; your anxiety building with each step. You would much prefer to simply know what was going on rather than experience some dramatic reveal especially today of all days. Every year the boy seems to forget that he agreed not to make a big deal.

"I sure hope so," You practically slam into him as she comes to an unexpected standstill. "Because I don't think I can return it."

"Return what? Oh god- can I take my blindfold off?"

As the flimsy fabric skims the length of your face to settle loosely around your neck, your eyes take a minute to adapt. You don't know quite what you were expecting but this was not it. Before you stands a small cottage surrounded by nothing but a wide-open field full of a rainbow of wildflowers. It was a beautiful little house with as much charm and beauty you'd expect from a place out in what seems like the middle of nowhere. It could be described as the perfect place to settle down.

"Surprise!" He was redder than a cherry tomato when he stepped into view. Both arms in the air as a sign of celebration but you were just rather... confused? Whose house was this and why had he brought you all the way out here?

"I don't get it?"

"We've been here for a while now so I thought we should get our own place or like, a better place. One where we don't have to worry about anyone else." His confidence appeared to develop with each word but his face was still powdered in a deep shade of pink. S this was your house? He'd decided to up and move without even consulting you? "So I got us a little cottage in the middle of nowhere. It kinda reminds me of the burrow only, y'know, smaller."

"It's ours?" His excitement is clear on his face and he quickly takes your hand. Pulling you along with him. "And that's not all."

"There's more?" Surely a whole house was enough. You were quite proud of Charlie for picking such a beautiful little place. Come summertime, you could already see yourself sitting among the flowers painting little pictures. You also wouldn't have to worry about muggles. Coming up on the front door, your boyfriend delivers you a little golden key. And with just a tiny degree of fear about what could be on the other side you unlock it. Much to your astonishment and disappointment, nothing is behind the door except the hallway leading inside. Charlie enters first and even as you follow, you half expect someone to jump out.

"I know I agreed not to make a big deal but how could I not?" He opens a door at the end of the hallway that leads to the kitchen. It's not a massive space but it's assuredly not small either, the whole place was already furnished but you recognise the surprise was truly what sat on the table. It was a two-tier cake covered in blue frosting including the words Happy Birthday scrawled across the top followed by your name.

"You... baked?"

"Mum sent it actually," Charlie chortled lightly as he wanders up behind you. Tossing a package of red with multicoloured polka-dots onto the table. "Sent this along too. Reckon it's a jumper or something."

"That was nice of her," You weren't sure of how to react to it all. Birthdays had never really been your thing but you appreciated that Mrs. Weasley had gone out of her way to make you something special.

"And from me..." He trails off and the sound of tiny tracks echo off the walls attended by an adorable yelp. Up to your feet slides an ash grey puppy who was more legs than anything else. It had bright blue eyes and floppy ears.

"You got me a dog?"

"I got us a dog- thought we needed a pet around here. I debated getting a crup but that'd be a disaster if your parents ever decide to visit." Crups were notorious for their dislike of muggles. You never understood why but he was right in his decision. The gesture was sweet but rather odd all things considered but still you smile. It was hard to be mad at something so cute and you weren't just talking about the dog. The puppy sits at your feet, wagging its little tail a mile a minute. There was no denying how adorable it was and at least it wasn't a dragon. Or a murtlap for that matter, those things were ugly. "You don't seem happy... do you not like him? I can take him back?" Kneeling, your hand drifts over the soft fur of the puppy's head. In response, the dog jumps up in an attempt to lick at your face. Your smile grows as you try to get away. "I think he likes you."

"What's his name?"

"Whatever you want? He's a Great Dane by the way." The puppy had calmed down a little and you stare as you ponder the perfect name for an ash grey Great Dane. "How about... Arlo?"

"Arlo?"

"Mhmm," You hum standing up straight. "And I'm plenty happy if not a little overwhelmed. You know how I feel when it comes to my birthday."

"I do," He nods casually. His palms snake around your waist drawing you flush against him "But I never want you to forget that someone cares about you- that I care about you so bloody much."

"I know you do," You give him a quick peck on the lips. "And I'm thankful for that and for all of this."

"Arlo is the perfect name, Happy Birthday" Your lips connect in a beautifully slow embrace that fills your body with warmth and as he pulls away, his forehead comes to rest against yours.  The dog barking as it explores the kitchen. "I'm just so grateful that you decided to run away with me."

[fandomlurker]

A Ponderous Rewatch: Opportunity Knox and Cameo

We’re treated to something a bit special this episode! No, not the art and animation quality, as that’s…kinda weak this time. Or maybe I should say Brain is drawn and animated kinda nightmarishly in a lot of parts? Well, you’ll see.

No, the special thing about this episode is that it’s written by Tom Minton, the writer at Warner Brothers who was the original inspiration for The Brain! The general idea for Pinky and the Brain as characters and as a show came from Tom Ruegger having an office close by to Tom Minton and Eddie Fitzgerald, two writers and storyboard artists who he would often hear laughing and joking around together but usually couldn’t make out what exactly they were saying. Minton usually spoke low and quietly and was more introverted, while Fitzgerald was much more outgoing and loud…basically already like a cartoon come to life (Eddie actually did exclaim things like ‘Narf’ occasionally in reality, which was an aspect that was added to and exaggerated in Pinky’s character). The fact that these two guys who were viewed as total opposites by their colleagues were good friends and spent so much time working together in secret lead to everyone joking that they were secretly trying to take over the world.

That isn’t to say that Pinky and Brain are 100% cartoon copies of Eddie and Tom—our mouse duo definitely veered off into their own distinct personalities very quickly—but the basic bones of their characters came from these two real life men. That makes me wonder about how surreal it must have been for Tom Minton to write for episodes starring Pinky and the Brain. He only did so four times in Animaniacs (and Eddie Fitzgerald never directly worked on Animaniacs or Pinky and the Brain, to my knowledge).

In any case, let’s move on to the actual episode.

We open to a multitude of bubbling beakers of mysterious liquids and one scientist working alone at night in the Acme Labs. She sneezes a few times, and then exclaims that she’s only a few steps away from curing the common cold.

…Man, Acme Labs is a total shitshow when it comes to their work, aren’t they? In addition to all the blatantly cruel experiments on animals that they do, just look at how lax this scientist is about lab safety. I’ll give her props for at least wearing her lab coat properly and tying her long hair up, which is something most media usually gets wrong. The fact that she’s doing this medical experiment while not wearing gloves or proper eye protection or a mask is very troubling. Not to mention that she’s doing all this while being very sick, if her violent sneezes are anything to go by.

Hmm, that cage is looking suspiciously empty.

Well, well! Looks like our mousey duo is up to something.

“Ahehehehe, oh this is gonna be great, Brain! Narf!”

“Quiet, Pinky!”

OH LORD, SHE JUST CHUGS IT HERSELF! Lady, PLEASE! The fact that this “cure” is piss-coloured only makes it worse.

Sweetie, I think this needs more peer-reviewed, double-blind tests before you can truthfully say that you’ve made a cure for the common cold. You have no proper safety gear on and you’re doing this experiment all alone at night with no one to check up on you.

Oh no. Boys, what are you doing?

So they catapult some powdery substance on her and she goes into a more violent sneezing fit than before. She leaves the room to go “back to the drawing board”, but honestly I’m hoping that she just goes home and isolates herself for a while.

“Success, Pinky!”

“Egad, Brain, what is this stuff?!”

“A new strain of pollen I created myself, Pinky. It causes a temporary but uncontrollable fit of allergic sneezing in man.”

Pinky looks very disturbed by this (although I suppose it doesn’t help that Brain has that very smug and devious look on his face) until Brain says that the effect is temporary. It’s a nice little detail that shows us approximately where Pinky’s lines of morality are. Brain makes his own strain of pollen to cause humans to have severe sneezing fits? That’s amazing but horrifying! Oh, it’s only temporary? Well okay, then. It’s fine if it doesn’t cause any lasting harm.

“No human is immune.”

AAAAAAHHHHHHH! Holy fuck, show, don’t give me a jumpscare like that!

“Do you realize what we will do with this pollen, Pinky?”

“Umm… Open a boutique?”

GAH! I told you to stop doing that! Seriously, what’s up with the way Brain’s draw in this episode?

“Yes, that’s it. We’ll open a boutique and sell ladies’ clothing and pollen.”

“Egad, Brain, what fun! I like this idea, I do! Hehehahahaha!~”

Of course he would. Of course he’d like working in a more domestic setting and selling ladies’ clothing.

…Say, now that I think of it, I think this might be the first time we get a hint as to Pinky’s love of what’s stereotypically thought of as women’s clothing. Hmm.

BONK!

“Focus, Pinky, FOCUS!”

Brain, sweetie, not everyone goes into tunnel-visioned hyperfocus like you do.

“We shall do no less than go to Fort Knox, Kentucky: keeper of the nation’s gold supply. There, we will expose the guards to our pollen…”

Despite the general awkwardness of the animation this episode, I like the way Brain is drawn here from over the shoulder. Very nice work.

Also…”our” pollen? Brain, you made that yourself. I guess this is just another example of Brain subconsciously including Pinky in everything.

“…and while they’re sneezing uncontrollably, we’ll move into the vault and take the gold!”

Brain’s plan blueprints are such a treat. Gold! Gold! Gold!

“For he who controls this nation’s capital, controls the nation!”

Okay, this close-up is a little better.

“Off to Fort Knox!”

“Oh! Wait! But isn’t the nation’s capital in Washington, DC?”

BONK!

“Capital as in money, Pinky!”

Oh come on now, Brain. It was an easy mistake to make. Also “capital” in this instance can mean more than money if you want to get semantic about it.

Brain grabs Pinky’s tail to drag him away again. It’s a wonder that Pinky’s tail isn’t as kinked up and injured as Brain’s is by now.

Ooo, improvised tools time!

“But how are we gonna get to Fort Knox, Brain?”

“We’ll simply borrow one of the lab’s technological resources:”

“The minivan!”

Pinky, are you mildly swooning over Brain acquiring a minivan? I…

This does bring up a point I wanted to make, though. Sometimes fans will question why Pinky and Brain stay at Acme Labs despite being put through so much inhumane and humiliating bullshit. While it’s true that Brain doesn’t much like the experiments he’s subjected to (Pinky is…another story entirely), I’m pretty sure he keeps the labs as his home because it’s incredibly convenient for his world domination plans. These are ACME labs, after all, and regardless of how terrible the experiments are, Acme has access to just about every bit of technology in the Warner Brothers cartoon universe. Brain can find or order whatever parts he needs for his latest world domination plan whenever he wants, and no human bats an eye at mysterious bits and bobs showing up because, well, it’s Acme. Acme is in the business of doing absolutely everything. No matter what daytime tortures Brain goes through, the lab is an incredible asset to him, and he’d be foolish to give that up.

Hello again, Warner siblings! I hope you’re having fun tonight.

That’s an awfully tiny sack of pollen to take for this trip…

“Won’t we get in trouble, Brain?”

“’Get in trouble’? Pinky, we’re going to take over the world!”

I just like the tiny silhouettes in this screencap.

“Besides, we’ll have the van back here by 8 am.”

“Oh! All right, then!”

[Quickly googles how long it would take to drive from Burbank California to Fort Knox]

…Are you sure about that, Brain? Are you really, positively sure?

Oh my goodness, a little winch and pulley system! That’s a little convoluted, but it’s adorable.

“Oi! Nice threads, Brain! But, err, why the disguise?”

“If we are to succeed in our mission, I must pass for an average, non-descript motorist, Pinky.”

I agree, Pinky. Brain always looks good in a suit.

Also he’s on a literal soap box, holy shit.

“So while we’re driving, call me Mr. Perkins.”

A trillby?!? Put it back! Putitbackputitbackputitback!

“Say no more! Brilliant, Brain!”

“Mr. Perkins.”

Oh no, he’s threatening to punch the audience now!

“Ooo, right, right. Narf! Heh, Mr. Per-kins.~”

“Pinky, start your engine!”

So Pinky tugs on a rope tied to the car keys to start the minivan, and I bet we can all already tell that he’s going to be doing most of the hard work for this roadtrip.

“Now depress the brake!”

I half expected a joke here where Pinky would say depressing things to the brake, but that didn’t happen. It’s just as well, I suppose. Pinky’s not usually the type to be mean to anyone or anything.

Instead, he pushes himself into the brake.

This made me curious about how strong real mice are. According to this scientific article, the average mouse can lift approximately 70 g in weight.That’s not a lot compared to us humans, of course, but seeing as the average weight of the common house mouse is 19 g (and common wood mice are on average 23 g), that’s really impressive! Still, for Pinky to be able to depress the brake is quite a feat that’s worlds beyond what the average real-life mouse can do.

Yes, yes, I know. It’s all cartoon logic and physics. That’s not going to stop me from having the headcanon that Pinky and the Brain have both been modified so much by Acme Labs that in addition to becoming sapient and intelligent, they’re basically little mouse superheroes in strength, too.

“Yes! Now I’ll shift the transmission into gear and…you give it the gas!”

Man, Pinky just slams his entire body onto the gas pedal with all his mousey might! You can hear him physically strain against it. Well done, Mr. Paulsen!

“Now Pinky, let us, in the vernacular, ‘take this hog out on the road and see who’s boss’!”

Oh lord, Brain’s on a slight power trip just from being able to drive a vehicle. If he ever does rule over the world one day, I fear he may explode from the sheer ego-high of it.

Anyway, on the way to Fort Knox they get stuck behind a rather slow transport truck. Well, Brain can’t have that! He’s got to get back to the lab by 8 am after all!

“Pinky! Prepare to pass a slow-moving vehicle!”

“Righty-o, Brain!”

Again, Pinky, I’m pretty sure you really aren’t supposed to stick your ass and chest out while saluting. You’re supposed to keep your posture straight.

…What am I saying? Pinky can’t do anything straight.

“Call me Mr. Perkins! Activate left turn indicator now.”

Aww, a little hop!~

Unfortunately it’s the wrong lever.

“…Let’s try that again, Pinky.”

“Narf! Wrong switch.”

He sits down to think and of course he gets it right that way.

Anyone else enjoying a lesson on how to drive from Pinky and the Brain? No? Just me? I mean, I already know how, but this is super cute.

“Exemplary work, Pinky!”

Brain, he just…he just pulled a switch. By accident. The fact that he’s so sincere about complimenting him for this is very cute but also very odd. I guess Brain’s in a good mood tonight.

“But we’re slowing down. Quickly, step on the gas!”

“Gas, check!”

Pinky, no!

Oh lord, he just lets himself fall directly on the gas pedal. You okay there, dude?

“Maintain pedal pressure, Pinky!”

I don’t think he has much of a choice, Brain.

So they get beside the freight truck and the driver of it picks up his CB radio mic.

“Hey, breaker breaker one nine, this here’s Big Red. Eh…what’s your handle, good buddy? Over.”

“The name’s Perkins. MISTER Perkins. Just an average, non-descript motorist.”

Wh—Why is there a CB radio installed in the Acme Lab minivan?

Pinky chooses this moment to lift himself off the gas pedal and then jump back on it in a weirdly showy, semi-acrobatic way. The first screencap has the tip of his tail almost in the shape of a heart, so I had to include it.

Our duo pass by the freight truck. Needless to say, the truck driver is still pretty rattled by his run-in with “Mr. Perkins”.

“I gotta quit eatin’ them double onion chili dogs!…”

Usually people just run with it on this show, but this is one of those rare moments where a human being doesn’t inexplicably fall for one of Brain’s horrible human disguises.

The minivan’s grill looks like teeth here and it’s almost menacing.

Uh oh, Brain’s getting dozy.

“Pinky…I’m in need of some music to keep myself raptly alert. And use the cruise control this time so we don’t lose speed!”

I don’t know why I’m so charmed by Pinky pressing the cruise control button like this, but it’s very cute.

“Cruise control on, Br—aaaerr—umm, Mr. Perkins!”

He is trying his best. :3c

“[yawn] Stellar, Pinky. Now see if you can locate a local radio station frequency.”

“Narf! Wrong knob…”

Smacking the hell out of the right knob make the radio explode into a loud yet incredibly mild generic rock tune. I’m surprised Pinky’s so alarmed. I wonder if Brain—

JEEZUS FUCK! You gotta stop giving me a heart attack with these sudden messed up close-ups of Brain, episode!

“Turn off the radio, Pinky!”

“Heeey! This knob’s loose!”

Aaaand there he goes.

“Oohoo ahaha! What’d’ya know? The lighter works!”

I wonder if Pinky knows what that’s actually for at this point, considering his utter disdain for smoking later in the spin-off?

“The radio, Pinky!”

“Ooo, right. Almost forgot!”

Uh oh.

“Whew. Suddenly I feel downright feverish, I do…”

Pinky has become a Charmander, and he’s not happy about it.

So he’s screaming and shouting his verbal tics all over the place and what’s Brain’s reaction?

“There’s no need for you to entertain me personally, Pinky. I’m quite awake now.”

BRAIN! You wipe that smug smile off your face right now, you little jerk! I know Pinky will be okay because he always is, but still.

One screen wipe later…

“Kentucky, Pinky! We made it!”

“All right, Brain!”

“Mister PERKINS!”

Brain, I think Pinky’s just not into this roleplay tonight. Or it might be your trillby. Lose the damn trillby.

“Fort Knox is mere miles away. Nothing can stop us now!”

Well, looks like you jinxed yourself.

I’ve got no love for cops, but his “what the fuck” expression here is choice.

“Good evening, officer. Was I exceeding the speed limit?”

“By about a hundred miles an hour.”

Oh, is that all? They’d need to be over by, like, a thousand or so miles an hour to make as good of a time as they did getting here.

Maybe this guy is going to arrest them for breaking the laws of time and space.

“I’m sorry, y’see—“

Shining a flashlight directly into your eyes? Yup, this is definitely a cop.

“I’m Mr. Perkins, an average, non-descript—“

“Can I see your license and registration, please?”

And then Pinky immediately interrupts the shakedown with a happy, matter-of-fact “We don’t have any! Zort! :D” and now my mind wanders off into let’s-overanalyze-the-shit-out-of-this-joke-scene territory because… Look at this. A cop pulls over a vehicle from Acme Labs doing about a hundred miles over the speed limit and finds Brain, a mouse in a suit trying to pass as a human driver. Then Pinky, who is dressed in no such disguise because why would Brain ever think of an obviously important detail ever in one of his plans, pops up to say that they don’t have a driver’s license.

…So what does this scene look like at this point from the cop’s perspective? Besides the very rare outlier like the truck driver from before, humans usually take Brain’s word for it that he’s also human, no matter how shoddy his disguise is. There are a few possibilities here, and I honestly can’t decide which is funniest:

1.      The cop can see through Brain’s poor disguise just like the truck driver from earlier can, and knows that these are actually two mice that have stolen a truck and have been speeding down the highway with it.

2.      The cop thinks Brain is a very odd-looking human without a driver’s license who’s been driving down the highway at insane speeds with his loose pet talking mouse by his side.

3.      The cop believes that Brain really is an odd-looking human who has no license and has been wildly speeding down the highway and also there’s an equally odd-looking human man with him who is stark naked for some mysterious reason.

I’ll let you decide which one is the most likely canon scenario as we continue as Brain tries to clear up this scenario.

“If you must know, we are two lab mice out to control the world by seizing its gold assets. But when we assume power, rest assured our budget will result in substantial new funding for law enforcement.”

…

Leave it to Brain to truthfully spell out his global domination intentions for no good reason and then lie his little mousey ass off to try and bribe his way out of going to jail.

Also, again, it’s “when we assume power” and not “when I assume power”. Hmm.

“…Oh.”

“Bwuhyuube… Be--best be on your way, then.”

“Thank you, officer.”

I’d say I was surprised that white privilege extends even to white lab mice here but…that would be a lie.

“Oh man, I do miss them witless teenage speed demons…”

So they finally make it to Fort Knox.

…And I guess the Warner siblings do, too!

The two mice have parked on a hill overlooking their target and gosh Brain, you’re looking extra pudgy here.

“It’s time to make our move, Pinky.”

Judging by the look on his face here, I think Pinky just noticed how thicc Brain’s behind has suddenly gotten.

Nevertheless, they begin their pollen assault on the guards.

Finally, the moment has arrived!

Brain’s head is shaped like a football and is almost as wide as Pinky is tall here, but besides that this is a cool shot.

This bit was also used in the spin-off’s theme for some reason, but now it will forever remind me of the absolute chaotic laughter that erupted when I got some friends to sit down and watch an episode of PatB. The stream decided to stop on this specific shot for buffering and they all just lost it. Most of the reaction was through voice on Discord, but luckily there were some friends using text chat too:

I live for moments like these when we’re streaming shows and movies.

“Egad! This is even better than a Ducktales episode, Brain!”

That’s pretty high praise, Pinky. I love the shadowing done on him here as well.

“Pinky… Are you pondering what I’m pondering?”

“Wha—I think so, Brain, but balancing a family and a career? Oof, it’s all too much for me!”

Pinky did…did you see all this gold and immediately begin envisioning yourself using the money to settle down and start a family?!? And so far in this series you aren’t dating anyone and you probably don’t even know anyone besides Brain and…

Okay, listen, I know it’s established later on that Pinky has wishes and daydreams about having a very domestic life, culminating in that one “Somewhere That’s Green” parody fantasy where he and Brain live together like a 50s couple in the Elmyra spin-off but… But…!

Well, you’ll kind of get a family along with your world domination “career” in a few years, Pinky. It’s probably not going to be quite how you envisioned it, though.

“The gold, Pinky! It’s all ours. Let’s move it out!”

Umm…

“One…two…three…and lift!”

I just realized that out of context the poses and faces in this screencap could look, uhh, questionable. But will that stop me from sharing it? No.

“I believe my plan has a…fatal flaw…”

About 27.4 pounds worth of a fatal flaw. You two might have super strength in comparison to other mice, but it looks like you both have a hard limit.

“I am in intense pain, Pinky.”

“Ditto, Brain. Zort!”

Well, okay, I guess it’s good that you are both cartoons, then. You boys should be able to shrug this off pretty quickly, especially Pinky.

OH GOD!

Is this what all those nightmarish close-ups of Brain were preparing me for?!?

“Fear not, Pinky, for the unwieldy atomic weight of gold will not thwart us tomorrow night.”

“Why? What are we doing tomorrow night, Brain?”

“The same thing we do every night, Pinky… Try to take over the world!”

You know, most cartoons would settle for them just being covered in bandages. Not Animaniacs, though. In Animaniacs were have to know that their removal from under the gold bar was so difficult and painful that fur was pulled out and they were left with bare, raw patches of skin. T-thanks, Warner Brothers?

Let’s end with a somewhat longer cameo appearance, as I suspect at this point Tumblr will have another fit if I try to combine two full episodes again.

The very next episode of Animaniacs has a skit called Hercule Yakko, which is a vague parody of Hercule Poirot mysteries. We get a good handful of cameos from the stars of other Animaniacs skits as passengers on a luxury cruise boat on the Nile.

The basic premise is that the Marita, one of the Hip Hippos, awakens in the middle of the night to find her comically large diamond necklace missing. The Warner siblings are a detective team who happen to also be onboard the ship and offer to help the hippo couple find it.

Before you ask, yes, this is the same episode as the infamous “fingerprints” joke.

Eventually the Warner siblings begin to go around knocking on the doors of the other passengers’ rooms to ask questions. They come across Slappy Squirrel first, who knows nothing about the missing diamond and just wants to be left alone to sleep. Then they meet Minerva Mink and, well, you can guess how that went. Then Yakko knocks on the last door.

“YES?”

Smol.

Look at them in their matching lederhosen! That’s absolutely adorable. Bravo to whichever of the mice had the idea for these “disguises”.

“Did you steal a big diamond?”

“No. We are Swiss hikers on holiday.”

Okay so maybe I’ll deduct a few points for wearing lederhosen, which is more associated with Bavaria and Germany, but claiming to be Swiss. Not that people in Switzerland didn’t also wear it, but you’d probably want to make your cover story as unsuspicious as possible, right? And that’s not even going into the idea of wearing a garment made from leather in hot, hot Egypt. These mice must be drenched in sweat…

“Look at me, Brain! I’m Heidi! Yodelehe-NARF!~”

Well at least someone in this duo is trying his best to reference things from Switzerland.

…Brain is the one that fucked up the lederhosen cultural background thing, isn’t he? Goddammit, Brain.

He just bonks the hell outta Pinky and silently slams the door in Yakko’s face.

After briefly talking with Marita, Yakko exclaims that he knows where the diamond is and asks that everyone assemble together in the state room. And so they do!

Aww, they’re sharing a chair because they are so, so tiny. :3c

“You’re probably all wondering why I called you here!”

“To reveal the thief?!?” says everyone in unison.

Minerva, you’re looking kind of weird in that second pic.

“No. It’s because you can’t play charades with three people.”

“That’s it! I’m goin’ back to bed.”

“So am I. I didn’t take the diamond!”

Man, Minerva really got a raw deal in the 90s. She only has two episode skits of her own and makes a few tiny cameos elsewhere, like in this one. I get that she was put on the back-burner as a character because her skits were considered “too suggestive”—and to be honest they were a bit over the top—but there are certainly ways that you can write a character who uses their sex appeal for comedic effect without it being disrespectful. It’s a shame they never tried to tweak the tone of her episodes just a tad.

But anyway, mice!

Brain is looking at Minerva with…worry? Concern? Confusion? Which is a very atypical reaction to Minerva. Gee, I wonder why.

Pinky is Looking Respectfully.

I’m never going to get over how cute they look in these outfits.

“I also am innocent.”

“Umm… I may have done it! I walk in my sleep, you know.”

Pinky, sweetie, I know you’re trying in your own odd little way to help but there’s no way you’d be able to carry a diamond of that size.

BONK!

This is the very last clear shot that the mice are in and it’s not very significant but I liked the angle of it.

Oh, you’re asking who took the diamond? No one did. The diamond was lodged in Marita’s butt fat the entire time. It’s the typical style of “humour” from skits with the Hip Hippos. Now you all know why no one is clamouring for their return in the reboot.

That’s it for this post, though. I should have the next episode that I promised would go with this one up in a day or two.

See you next time, folks, when we go off to the races!

[year-of-art]

365 Days Of Art 2018

First off, this is going to be a long post.

I have decided to make a drawing challenge list for an entire year. Ya sounds crazy but I’ve always been a bit eccentric.

This is also going to be my New Years resolution, so starting January 1st I will be picking a subject at random every day. Just need to find a big jar ^_^

I will be working in any media, not just pencil. The great thing about this challenge is that I can experiment with different media. This also takes me back to my College days, where we did a lot of experimenting e.g with sticks, feathers, I even made a printing tile out of form I found in a Pizza box.

Why am I doing this? I want to start drawing and painting again and I’ve always found it very therapeutic.

I will be posting each piece on my new art blog and in my Deviant Art gallery.

Feel free to use this list yourself and enjoy ^_^

A Flower

Hands

A Cartoon Character

Hearts

A Video Game

A Cat

Something Scary

Favourite Fruit

In The Garden

Favourite Movie

A Pokemon

A Bird

A Feather

An Umbrella

Rain

Favourite TV Show

A Butterfly

A Dream Catcher

Favourite Comic

Favourite Season

The Seaside

A Doodle

Something Pink

Dream Holiday

A Dog

Something Old

Favourite Book

A Piece Of Jewellery

Wonderland

Something Red

Home Comforts

A Bug

Favourite Hobby

Your Eyes

An Old Camera

Your Parents

Can't Live Without

Tea And Biscuits

Favourite Place

An Old Bottle

The 1980s

Fireworks

What Inspires You

An Old Phone

Keep Putting Off

An Ordinary Day

A Vampire

Favourite Musician

Something Green

A Cherished Item

Your Star Sign

Favourite Anime

Mandala

Something Blue

Steampunk

Your Countries Flag

A Logo

Landscape

The 1990s

A Sunset

Some Clothes

Your Birthstone

An Old Key

Favourite Fairytale

Monogram

What Upsets You

A Wish

The Milky Way

Something Blue

A Tiger

A Tree

An Old Light Bulb

Fictional Couple

This Month

A Place You’ve Visited

Someone You Admire

8 Bit Video Games

Something Yellow

A British Garden

Tea And Cakes

Something You Hate

A Plant

Favourite Disney Movie

Charms

An Old Sewing Machine

Stars

A Cityscape

Something Orange

An Anime Character

A Fashion Designer

The 1960s

A Robot

A Dragon

Zentangle

A Musical Instrument

Under The Sea

Sugar Skull

An Old Clock

What Makes You Happy

The 1950s

Artist You Admire

Mythical Creatures

Rainbow

Something Purple

Favourite Food

A Leaf

A Cupcake

Favourite Holiday

Dream Job

Favourite Country

An Old Teapot

Harry Potter

Something New

Favourite Sweet

Favourite Mug

Medieval Mayhem

An Old Bicycle

Marvel Movies

Favourite Manga

16 Bit Video Games

Sci-Fi Landscape

Something White

A Lion

Anything You Want

Favourite Colour

Final Fantasy

A Pokeball

Your Name Meaning

A Fish

Checkerboard

A Chess Piece

Fantasy Landscape

Self Portrait

Lips

A Dandelion

The 1920s

An Owl

Favourite Biscuit

Street Art Graffiti

Balloons

An Old Building

Celtic Knot

A Wolf

Flower Faces

Sunflowers

A Glass Of Water

Sliced Fruit

Year 3000

Piece Of Lego

Fictional Rivals

Something Cute

Optical Illusions

Cyberpunk

A Bat

A Phoenix

Stripes And Spots

Favourite Quote

Tropical Florals

Candles

Something Silver

A Journey

Art Deco

A Vase Of Flowers

A Spiders Web

Night and Day

Day At Comic Con

Stamps

Draw It Again

The Olympics

A Pack Of Cards

A Movie Scene

Manga Panel

An Old Stone Bridge

Something Gold

A Puzzle Box

Old Perfume Bottle

Abstract Flowers

Another Doodle

Board Game Pieces

The 1940s

Star Wars

Sun And Moon

A Sliced Vegetable

A Dragonfly

A World Of Books

First Toy

Fairy Tail

Steampunk Hat

Filigree Heart

A Rabbit

Keep Calm And…?

Clouds

Diamonds

Jewellery Tattoo

Something GOT

A Modern Bridge

Butterfly Faces

Queen Of Hearts

Silhouette

Ghost In The Shell

The Year 2000

Falling Apart

Abstract Butterfly

Good Morning World

A Werewolf

Disney Character

City Lights

New Life

Sonic

Sword Art Online

Under Water

A Black Cat

Original Character

Crystals

Anime Angel

A Butterfly Tattoo

A Necklace

Stone Castle

How R U Feeling?

Crosshatch Flower

Day Of The Dead

The 1930s

A Mermaid

Tomb Raider

Chinese Zodiac

Abstract Dragonfly

Favourite Junk Food

A Mountain

A Witch

Candy Land

Last Book You Read

Healing Magic

A Sea Shell

Angels & Demons

A Knight

Frames

English Breakfast

Fire And Ice

Water And Lightning

You've Cosplayed

Apocalyptic World

An Old Shoe

Geometry Art

Water Lilies

A Pair Of Earrings

Anime Eyes

An Elephant

The Rainforest

A Fictional World

Waves

Time Travel

Tassels

A Ring

A Dark Wizard

How R U Feeling?

Bead Art

Another Mandala

Steampunk Weapon

A Disney Princess

Yin And Yang

Paris

U In An Anime

Favourite Actor

The Colour Wheel

A Bracelet

The Alphabet

Pirates

Filigree Leaves

A Chrysanthemum

Peace

Medieval Buildings

A Chair

Another Zentangle

Mario Bros

A Seahorse

Spoons

Infinity

Anime Fan Art

A Dark Fairy

An Old Car

A Sword

Tropical Fish

Create A Outfit

Tribal Art

King Arthur

A Birdcage

Black & White

A Mask

A Doll

Mecha Anime

Experimental Draw

Found Objects

Anything U Want

A Fairy Door

Ice Cream

From The £ Shop

World Map

Hair

Dragon Eyes

Typography

A Fox

Treble Clef

An Anchor

Believe In Yourself

The Mad Hatter

A Hedgehog

A Dancer

A Peacock

Pocket Watch

Coca Cola Bottle

Old Jars

A Lollipop

Paint Brushes

A Bowl Of Fruit

Lavender Fields

A French Breakfast

Cute Donuts

A Panda Bear

Little Big Planet

Anime Crossover

A Unicorn

Peter Pan

Street Lights

A Cartoon Ninja

Storm In A Teacup

Wing Tattoo

A Compass

A Goldfish

A Penny

Animal Kites

A Ladybug

An Orchid

Needle & Thread

Watermelon

A Cute Alien

Magic Wand

Magic Potion

Steampunk Goggles

An Anime Ninja

Neo Victorian

Hippie Art

A Spaceship

Philosopher's Stone

Greatest Fear

Actress You Like

Surname Meanings

Chibi Party

Koi Fish

Game Boy

An Old Bench

Escape

Light & Shadow

Pens & Pencils

A Lighthouse

Harbor

Ninja Turtles

Egypt

Swirls And Spirals

Tree Of Life

A Dinosaur

The Deathly Hallows

Dream Home

You As A Pokemon

Greek Mythology

Coral Reef

[vivaciouswordsmith]

Chapter 8!

Chapter 8 of Four-Legged Fiend is up! As always, you can read it here, or beneath the cut. Enjoy!

Chapter 8: Fake AH Crew Rises

Bit by bit, the newly dubbed Fake AH Crew climbed the criminal ladder. 

A trickle of lowlifes and down on their luck youths came to them over time, and they painstakingly took little bits and pieces of other gangs’ territories. They still had to be careful, and worked more often in the shadows and the sidelines than not. If not for Geoff’s almost constant reassurances and dreams of standing atop Los Santos as rulers of the entire city, they’d have burned out and given up long ago.

Still, the first year was rough. There were several run-ins with the police, quite a few of which ended with someone spending the night in lock-up. Three attempts to capture some new turf resulted in firefights that the crew was forced to retreat from, tails between their legs. Exasperated by the crawling pace of their city takeover, Geoff started looking for more outside help. Anybody or anything that could give them a better, sharper edge over their competition was eagerly sought out for recruitment. No price was too much for Geoff, but even so, there were many candidates who either didn’t meet the mark, or simply checked the Fakes out and deemed them to be not worth it.

Some months later, Geoff finally got the bite he was looking for. A sniper up in Liberty City named Ray got in contact with him, expressing a desire for a change of scenery, and perhaps an apartment bigger than a bedroom that didn’t cost several thousand dollars a month. Geoff offered him a place to stay and a steady paycheck, and that was that. He was in Los Santos within the week.

With five men and one wolfdog in their crew, their ascent through the ranks turned into something that could only be called meteoric. They grew bold enough to pull off bigger and riskier jobs, and each take grew larger and larger. Soon enough they left the Los Santos slums behind and eyeballed the chrome and black apartments, and especially the penthouses. Sadly they weren’t quite up to penthouse levels of money, but Geoff remained optimistic.

With more and more money rolling in, their tastes became more and more refined. Stuttery, ancient cars were traded in for sleek super machines with purring engines and leather seats. Weapons were clad in every color of the rainbow, and ranged from practical to completely outrageous. Nobody in their right minds knew when the occasion for an accurate reconstruction of an 18th century bayonet might arise, but that didn’t stop the entire crew getting one apiece. Expensive and rare liquors soon sucked away a large chunk of Geoff’s money, not that he particularly cared. They were finally rising above the usual Los Santos grime, and that was more than enough reward. His heart swelled every time he saw their name headlining every paper in the city.

In a year and a half, they left their fancy apartment behind and finally made it to the penthouse of their dreams. It sat right in the heart of their city and spanned nearly ten thousand glorious square feet of building. It had three floors, ten bedrooms, God only knew how many other nooks and crannies, and, most importantly, a full bar. In the true fashion of the newly rich, they gave Ryan his own room, complete with a doggy door and closet full of toys.

They didn’t let the luxury get to their heads. While they were off the streets, they knew the carpet could be ripped out from under their feet at any moment. The LSPD was less dangerous to them now, yes, but they were still somewhat of a threat, not to mention the fact that they were now drawing the attention of the FIB and the nearby military base. There were also the numerous gangs who badly wanted their heads, and not in a sexy way. They were still criminals, and they still had their jobs to do. The difference now was that they were the ones near the top fending off desperate bottom feeders.

Still, the Fake AH Crew had plenty of opportunity for leisure, and they were content with their new place in the underworld. The good times stretched into the horizon, and they thought the party would never end.

It came as a bit of a shock, then, when Ray told them he was leaving the crew. Complacency was not for him, so he packed up and moved on to a new life. He promised to stay in contact, and the crew offered support if he ever needed it, and that was it. Only a week after the announcement, his things had been cleared out of the penthouse, and he was gone.

This left the crew in a bit of a pickle. Five main members could tackle almost any heist, and the varying skill sets left everyone feeling confident and sure in their positions. Four felt a little too vulnerable, plus their long-range awareness had dropped quite a bit. Several heist ideas were put back on the drawing board for the time being, and other jobs were called off, to the disappointment of the other various members of the crew.

In the meantime, Geoff started putting out feelers for a new number six. He hoped he’d be able to find one within his own crew, but in case nobody made the cut, he made sure to keep his options open. Six months later, he’d made no progress on that front, and the crew settled back into their four-man band.

They’d be okay. They’d survived much worse before.

Jeremy was excited. For the first time since he’d signed up with the Fakes, he’d been summoned to their main HQ. A year of grunt work and near misses had led to what he was sure was moving up the ladder. His sometimes friend Matt was a lot more skeptical, as he’d never heard of promotions being given out from the penthouse, but Jeremy remained optimistic.

“I’m telling you, this is it,” he said. “We’re gonna make it so big, Matt!”

“I don’t know.” Matt fiddled with the wire of his headphones and huddled against the gold-tinted wall of the elevator. “Nobody’s ever been summoned to the penthouse before. It doesn’t fucking happen.”

“Then this has to be a special case, right? Right?”

Matt just shrugged.

“God, I hate you sometimes.”

The elevator dinged, and the doors rolled open at that moment. A lone door stood at the end of a short hallway. Jeremy rocked on his heels and grinned. “This is it!” He walked to the gleaming mahogany door, and ignored Matt humming the funeral march along the way. He knocked on the door, and it swung open without further ado.

They were almost immediately confronted by the gigantic expanse of the main crew’s penthouse. A vast white couch sat in front of one of the biggest flat screen TVs Jeremy had ever seen. Both sides of the couch had tiny chrome mini-fridges next to them. Directly in front of them sat a set of stairs leading into another room, but they couldn’t make out any details. A kitchen stocked with silver appliances lay behind an island and a bar stocked with an insane amount of liquor bottles. Several abstract paintings Jeremy was sure had just been on display at the museum two months ago rested on the walls.

“Where the fuck is everyone? And why the fuck did the door just open?”

“I, uh, I don’t…really know.” He wandered over to the couch and glanced down at the papers scattered on the table. He squinted, but he couldn’t make out what the designs were supposed to be. “Boss said to be here at two.”

“And what time is it?”

Jeremy pulled his glove down and checked his watch. “Two o’ five.”

“Well…shit.”

They stood awkwardly in the room for a few minutes. Matt moved his headphones onto his ears, and music soon blasted from the cheap red headset. Jeremy took out his phone and fiddled with it. He read the message again, and confirmed that they were supposed to be at the penthouse at two. So where the fuck was everybody? Had they been duped?

‘Probably shoulda figured that out before coming here,’ he thought.

A jingling around the corner made Jeremy nearly jump out of his skin. He put his phone away, and elbowed Matt in the gut. He huffed in annoyance, but the music died immediately afterward. They straightened and made an effort to look at least somewhat professional.

The jingling moved around the corner, and Jeremy felt a thrill run down his back. He’d only seen the Fake AH Crew’s pet wolfdog once, and that was from pretty far away during a B-Team debriefing. Seeing him from about five feet away was a different experience altogether. His long black claws clicked on the varnished wood floor, and his maw clamped around a large bone. The markings around his eyes and muzzle really did look so much like a skull, to the point where it was chilling.

The wolf froze the moment he saw Matt and Jeremy standing in the living room. His bone thudded to the ground while his fur stood on end. Black lips pulled back to show off long white teeth. He moved forward with the careful steps of a predator ready to kill, still growling. His blue eyes burned with an animal ferocity.

Matt’s hand flashed to his waist. “We are going to fucking die here. Oh my God.”

“Don’t…do…anything,” said Jeremy. “You’ll just make him mad if you pull your gun.”

“Make him – it’s a fucking wolf!” Matt pointed at him and gestured wildly. “It’s already mad!”

“I hear he’s really smart, though. Maybe I can calm him down!”

“You want to try that, Dr. Doolittle? Be my fucking guest. I am not going to be eaten by a wolf.” Matt backed toward the door, hands slowly rising like the wolf held him at gunpoint. Another growl made him freeze in place.

“Hey, uh, it’s okay, boy.” Jeremy crept forward and held out his hand. “We’re part of the crew. We’re not here to, uh, to take anything, or hurt anybody, okay? We just want to talk to Geoff.”

“If you die, I’m going to put ‘Killed while trying to talk his way out of being eaten by wolf,’” said Matt.

“Shut up!”

Meanwhile, the wolf edged closer. Its jaws parted, and a few strands of saliva dripped onto the floor. Jeremy pulled his right glove off and offered his naked palm to the wolf. Either it would smell his hand, or it would bite him. He sure as fuck hoped it wouldn’t bite him. The smelling thing worked with cats, surely it would work with dogs too, right?

The wolf drew even closer, and Jeremy swallowed. The wolf’s shoulders reached his midriff, and his open jaws looked wide enough to take off his hand in a single bite. Dread edged into his stomach and threatened to weigh it down. He fought against the feeling.

For a few torturous seconds, the wolf’s nose skimmed over his palm. Hot breaths ghosted over the skin, and the horrible weight in his stomach grew heavier. Despite his earlier bravado, he was about ninety percent sure the wolf was about to make him a one-armed bandit at this point.

The beast huffed loudly and moved to inspect his chest and stomach. Jeremy slowly held up his hands and looked over at Matt.

“What? The fuck do you think I could do?”

“Good point.” He looked back down at the wolf, and met his bright blue eyes. “Gotta admit, I’m this close to pissing myself. Holy fuck.”

The wolfdog’s nose returned to his hand. He tensed and waited for fangs to rip into his flesh. However, it didn’t seem that was the case. The wolf grunted and got the bridge of his muzzle into Jeremy’s palm. He shifted the hand up and flipped it onto his head. He blinked. The wolf looked up at him and flicked his good ear. He moved his fingers behind the ear and scratched the thick hairs there. The wolf grinned up at him.

“Holy shit, you’re not dead.” Matt walked back over to them.

“I guess I smell friendly or something.” He moved his other hand behind the wolf’s ear stump and scratched there, too. The wolf’s eyes fluttered shut, and his white foot lifted off the ground and kicked once or twice.

A door opened behind them, and they jumped again. Upon turning around they saw Geoffrey Ramsey himself descending one of the staircases. He grinned when he saw the two of them standing in the living room.

“Oh! There you are. I was…wondering…when…” He trailed off when he saw the wolfdog begging Jeremy for pets. “You’re petting Ryan?”

“Uh…Yes?”

“Ryan never lets anyone he doesn’t know pet him.” Ryan’s ears twitched when Geoff said his name. He pulled away from Jeremy’s hands and wandered over to the Fakes’ boss. He gave the wolfdog a few pats on the head, and the pacified pup trotted down the hallway. “Seriously, never.”

“He’s not that friendly?”

“Not if he doesn’t know them.” Geoff flopped down on the couch and propped his heels up on the coffee table. “Anyway, back to business. You know why you guys are here?”

Matt and Jeremy looked at each other and said, “No,” in unison.

Geoff let out a breath. “Fuck. Well, as you know, we have an open slot on the main crew.” They nodded. “I’ve been looking for a replacement for a while, and ideally, I’d like to pull someone from the crew.”

A thrill zinged down Jeremy’s spine. “So…?”

“So, I’m going to be keeping a close eye on the B-teams for a while.” Geoff raised his eyebrows and smirked. “Maybe if one of you assholes does really well, I’ll try you out with the main crew. And if you continue to impress…” He gestured around the penthouse with one hand. “All this could be yours.”

God, that was more than Jeremy could have ever dreamed of. Barely a year ago, he’d still been on the streets, watching the Fakes from afar with nothing short of admiration, wondering if he’d ever even break through the bottom ranks. Now he stood in front of the boss of the entire crew and was offered the opportunity of a lifetime. Sure, it wasn’t given to him directly, but he still had a chance. And he was the one learning it straight from the source. That had to count for something, right?

Matt, ever the realist, decided this was the time to pop Jeremy’s little dream bubble. “And you decide we’re all fucking morons and not worth dealing with?”

“Then it’s straight to plan B. Hire someone outside the crew. Fuck, I haven’t researched this much in goddamn years. I’d rather not have to start up all that shit again.” He gave the two of them a serious look and straightened his bow tie. “You fuckers better impress me.”

“We’ll do our best,” said Jeremy. Privately he hoped he didn’t sound too eager. He’d get nowhere if they thought he was an asskisser.

“Good. Now get out of my house.” Geoff turned away from them and flipped on the TV.

“Uh…okay. Thanks for having us?”

A squeak from behind them made Matt and Jeremy jump about a foot into the air. They turned and saw Ryan standing behind them. A bedraggled, raggy brown cow toy hung from his mouth. It was missing one beady black eye and a good deal of off-white fluff escaped its body from a hole in its side. He stepped forward and dropped the toy on the toe of Jeremy’s boot.

“Uh…thanks?” He pinched a flimsy hoof between his thumb and forefinger and lifted the cow into the air.

“He wants you to throw it,” Geoff said. “He’ll annoy you until you do it.”

“Oh, uh, okay then.”

Jeremy cocked his hand over his shoulder, and the pup put his rump in the air and wagged his tail. He pretended to lob the toy down the staircase and quickly hid his hand behind his back. To his surprise, the wolfdog stood upright and growled. He lifted a paw and scratched at Jeremy’s jacket.

“Yeah, he doesn’t fall for that one anymore.”

“Really? He must be really smart, then,” said Matt. He reached down to pat the wolf’s head, but withdrew when he gave the shabby criminal a withering glare.

“He is and he isn’t,” said Geoff.

Jeremy finally relented and tossed the toy down the stairs. Ryan’s ears stood on end and he careened down the stairs to get it. His black-and-white tail waved once, and he was gone.

“Okay, so let’s get this straight before we go.” Matt toyed with the wire of his headphones and glared at his boss. “You only called us here, to the penthouse, where only the main crew works, the most prestigious place the Fakes own, where the rest of us fucks haven’t even stepped foot, because you wanted us to tell the guys you’re recruiting and you’ll be watching us extra close.”

Geoff turned around and gave them a look. “Do you have a problem with that?”

“Geoff, you have a fucking phone! Why didn’t you just call us?!”

Geoff snickered and turned back to his show.

“Did he just call us down here just to make us come down here?” Matt asked Jeremy.

“Probably.” Jeremy shrugged and turned back to the door.

“Of course he did. Fuck me, how much time have we wasted?”

Jeremy opened his mouth to answer, but a litany of squeaks drowned him out. Ryan ran back up the stairs and dropped the cow toy at his feet. He squatted down again and wagged his tail. His tongue flopped out of his mouth and dribbled on the floor in between his paws.

“Sorry, Ryan. We gotta go.” Jeremy and Matt moved toward the door. Ryan picked up the toy and squeaked it again. “We’re leaving.”

“C’mere, Ryan. The boys’ll be home soon, and then we’ll take a W – A – L – K.” Geoff’s offer went unheard. Ryan bumped Jeremy’s hand with his nose and whined. “Jesus, Ryan, come here already!”

The wolf stood on his hind paws and put his front paws on Jeremy’s shoulders. Jeremy couldn’t help but swallow nervously. The beast was fucking humongous, definitely much taller than he was. And he was heavy, too. Jeremy staggered under his weight, but managed to keep himself from falling by grabbing Matt’s jacket. He got a face full of snuffling, whining skull-marked muzzle leaving a cold nose print on his right cheek.

“Ryan! Down!” He whined again and leaned more of his weight into Jeremy. “Ryan, get down right now, or you can kiss your treats goodbye!” The wolf’s good ear flattened against his head, and he dropped back down onto the floor. His tail hung between his legs, and his eyes were downcast.

He looked so sad and forlorn, Jeremy just had to do something. He knelt and scratched the wolfdog behind his half-ear. “We’ll be back, okay, buddy? We’ll see you again.” He rubbed the markings between his eyes and smiled. Then he grabbed the toy and tossed it into the kitchen. The pup turned on his heels and trotted off into the kitchen. They took the opportunity and left.

“‘We’ll be back,’ huh?” Matt asked. He grinned and waggled his eyebrows at Jeremy. “Do you seriously think you’re going to be picked for the new number six?”

Jeremy shoved his shoulder and scowled. “I don’t think anything. I’m just going to do my best and hope.” He reached out and pressed the button to call the elevator. “Fuck me, I hope this doesn’t cause too much chaos.”

“It’s the fucking Fake AH Crew, of course there’s going to be chaos.”

A loud howl sounded from behind them, followed by a burst of swearing. Matt let out a chuff of laughter. “Jesus, he must really like you.”

“That has to be good, right? Geoff said he doesn’t like anyone outside the main crew.”

“Oooh, it could be a sign.” Matt shook his head and pulled his phone out of his pocket.

Jeremy kept quiet. His mind went to the job he and the other members of B-team would be taking that Saturday. In all likelihood, it would be fairly routine, but even so, the fact that the main five would be watching made his stomach roll. The pressure would be on to really nail each and every little detail.

Still, he’d rise to the occasion.

He’d do anything if it meant he could stand beside his heroes.

(Also, as a side note, my new laptop skin comes courtesy of @asking-ask. It’s adorable.)