#also do you think shane would ever let that happen.

[littlekingbergara]

im loving reading everyones puppet history theories and theyre great theyre lovely theories and predictions but. you guys keep saying you think ryan is going to get hurt. have you considered this would make me very sad ???

[perotovar]

baby, i'm-a want you — (prologue) "session zero"

gif by me

pairing: javier peña/shane morrissey (just this time. main pairing is still javi/joel) rating: E (18+) mdni word count: 1.6k content: unprotected p in a, one (1) use of the word "daddy" (this is gay porn what do you expect), shane being the biggest goth twink, javier being a good dom, swearing, smoking dividers: @saradika-graphics beta: @qveerthe0ry (ily ♥)

summary: javier peña has been doing this a long time. he's really good at his job. joel miller? not so much. he started doing this to get some extra cash to support his daughters. what happens when they're supposed to do a scene together? aka, the au where most of the ppcu boys are gay porn stars~

series masterlist

Javier Peña was good at his job.

“Fuck, harder–”

Really good.

He got millions of views on his page every month, and made enough to be comfortable as well as spend a little extra if he wanted to. He also got to have sex as frequently as he wanted because of that. He wasn’t bound to a schedule, but he filmed often just because he liked to. 

“J-Javi, I’m gonna come, please.” The cute young thing below him moaned weakly and turned back to Javier, looking up at him with the biggest and wettest eyes. That would probably be the thumbnail of the video.

“Yeah?” He grunted, a smirk plastered on his lips. He lifted a hand and landed a hard slap against the young man’s right cheek, the left one gripped tightly in Javier’s free hand. The young man – Shane – whimpered and trembled below him, arching his back to fuck himself on Javier’s cock. “Mmm, si lo eres,” Javier hummed, rubbing Shane’s tattooed side comfortingly. He landed another loud slap against Shane’s tender flesh and watched the skin ripple with heat in his eyes. (Yes, you are.)

Javier made it a point to take care of whoever he was doing a scene with. Especially if they were pretty green. This was only Shane’s second ever official one, after a scene where he gave Din a blowjob. He leaned over Shane’s clammy skin, pressing chest to back and tangled his fingers into Shane’s sweaty, dyed black locks. “You doin’ okay?” When he asked, the hairs above his lip tickled Shane’s ear a little. His voice was soft enough that the mics or cameras wouldn’t pick up on it. He kept up the pace of his hips, the sound of skin slapping against skin echoing in the mostly-empty “bedroom”. 

Shane bit his lip, eyebrows downturned in pleasure and nodded as subtly as he could. He let out a weak grunt, a single tear falling from one of his eyes. “J-Javi–! There!”

Javier grinned and kissed along Shane's shoulder blades before he gripped the younger man’s hips tightly and started slamming into him, angling directly where Shane needed him most. Shane’s head hung heavily between his arms as he put most of his weight on his elbows. The chains and earrings he wore clanged against each other with every rhythmic beat of Javier’s hips, making him moan and whine louder. 

“C’mon, pretty boy,” Javier grunted, pressing a large hand to Shane’s lower back to keep him steady. “C’mon.”

Pre-cum dripped onto the sheets from Shane’s throbbing cock as it swung between his legs, lightly slapping against his lower tummy. Shane let out one last pathetic whimper before he stilled and came hard, thick ropes hitting the sheets and head thrown back, mouth open in an obscene O. Perhaps a little overdone, but Javier didn’t think the young man was faking anything. He’ll get there.

Shane’s entire body trembled as he looked back at Javier. “I-inside,” he panted. “Please.”

“Yeah? You want me to fill you up, pretty boy?” Javier grinned, hips still moving rhythmically.

Shane’s cock twitched in overstimulation, but he nodded anyway, whining weakly.

Javier knew his own body better than anything in the world, so he knew that it would only take a few more strokes and he’d be finished. “C’mere,” he grunted, gripping onto Shane’s torso to heave him up onto his knees so he could press Shane’s back to his front. Shane wailed as Javier sped up the beat of his hips, now only focused on getting what Max, the director, called “the money shot”. Even if he’d done this a hundred times, it always felt good, and a depraved little part of him loved seeing himself stake a claim over his scene partner.

Javier let out a punched out breath, grunting as his hips stilled, then moved in a slight staccato, pumping Shane’s ass full of his cum. “Fuck,” he groaned, rolling his hips in slow waves until the last drop left his cock. Shane let out a weak sob as a final, pitiful spurt of his own cum landed on the sheets in front of them. Javier hummed and gently laid Shane down on his side away from the mess, and slowly turned him onto his stomach a little.

One of the camera men got closer to zoom in on Javier’s cum trickling out of Shane’s cute little hole, Javier’s big hands spreading his cheeks. “Good boy,” Javier hummed happily, teasingly prodding at the top of Shane’s puffy, used rim. Shane giggled shyly as he looked back at Javier, a blush high on his cheeks. His eyeliner and mascara was completely ruined, faint tracks running down his cheeks.

“Thank you, daddy,” Shane recited shyly, biting his lip.

“And, cut! Very good, boys.” Max’s booming voice cut through the tension like a knife.

Javier’s shoulders deflated a little, a tired smile crossing his features. “You alright, kid?” He asked, voice rough. 

Shane smiled and nodded up at him, that deep blush still present. “Y-yeah. You’re amazing, Javier.”

Javier snorted and held a hand out for him as he stood from the bed. Slowly, Shane crawled off the bed, the cum trickling down the back of his thighs. Javier took him by the hand over to the small rack of robes and handed him one. “Thank you. You weren’t so bad yourself. They’re gonna love that face of yours,” he winked, nudging Shane’s chin with the knuckle on his index finger.

Shane smiled shyly and nodded, eyes downcast. “You’ve got a scene with Joel tomorrow, right?”

Joel. He was an interesting one. Javier had done a scene with him before and it went… really well. It’s one of Javier’s most viewed videos on his page. Javier doesn’t get a chance to bottom very often, and if he does, it’s usually with Pero or Dave. But after Joel… Well, he had to take a couple days off after that one. He didn’t get to talk to Joel much after their scene, but he seemed to… change once Max called cut. He wasn’t quite so… intense. While filming, Joel seemed to shift into a completely different person; he was all grunts and furrowed brows and some of the filthiest dirty talk Javier had ever heard. It was one of the first times Javier actually felt… submissive. Small, but not in a bad way. Like Joel would take care of him. Javier may play the part of the aloof, dominant top, but he likes being held sometimes too. The idea of getting to do that again was attractive to him, but more than that, he wanted to see if he could get a chance to properly talk to Joel. He seemed almost as new as Shane, but showcased it in a completely different way.

Javier cleared his throat and nodded, tying his own robe around his waist. “I do,” he hummed, turning toward one of the assistants, a young red headed girl whose name he couldn’t place at the moment, and motioned for a cigarette. She nodded and took off toward where he left his things.

Shane sighed dreamily, “I wanna do a scene with him.”

Javier smirked and laughed lowly. “Maybe get some more under your belt and you will. Think he’d like you,” he winked.

“Your cigarettes, Javi,” the assistant – Amy, that was her name – said, tapping the yellow pack against his shoulder.

“Thank you,” he nodded once toward her, hitting the bottom of the pack against his hand a few times before turning it around and doing the same thing there. He pulled one out and lit it after he stuck the butt in his mouth. Lighting up, he sucked in the smoke and exhaled, his mind clearing already.

“I feel like I should be flattered,” Shane giggled, sipping on some water as he sat, one leg draped over the other. “Needing a cigarette after our scene. How very 70s of you.”

Javier rolled his eyes, but smirked, roughing up the kid’s hair playfully. “Yeah, yeah. You were good.”

“Javi, can I talk to you for a sec?”

Javier turned to Max Phillips, the director and owner of the website, and nodded. “Course,” he mumbled, the cigarette hanging from between his lips. “What’s up?”

Max pulled Javier to a secluded room, which made Javier raise a brow. Max waved him off and smiled. “Just wanted to tell you that the last scene you did? With Marcus? Just hit 2 mill last night.”

“Shit, really? People must really like the FBI/DEA storyline,” he hummed, part amused, part sarcastic.

“Yeah, so we’re thinking of doing a second part. Like a followup, where–”

“When?”

“How’s tomorrow?”

Javier frowned. This is the part of his job where he got to pull rank a little. He didn’t normally, but he really wanted to do that scene with Joel. He wasn’t going to miss his chance to pick Joel’s brain a little. 

“What about Monday? I’ve got a scene with Joel tomorrow.”

Max exhaled, like he knew it was coming, and rested his hands on his hips, popping a knee dramatically. “You sure?”

Javier nodded. “‘M sure. I know my job, Max. And I haven’t done a scene with Joel in a while,” He paused. “You can’t argue with the numbers my last one with him pulled.” He knew exactly which buttons to push with Max. His relationship with his boss was fine, but Max could be a real douchebag at times. Javier wasn’t afraid of him or anything, but he also didn’t want to get reprimanded at best, or lose his job at worst.

Max chewed on his bottom lip for a minute. “Fuck,” he sighed. “Alright, fine. Still wanna do the one with Marcus?”

Javier nodded, a triumphant little smile on his face. “Course. He’s got a pretty cock.”

“Very true. Alright, go get yourself cleaned up, and I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Javier nodded, sucking another drag off his cigarette. His stomach grumbled and he groaned. Maybe he’ll get Chinese tonight.

[thatfandomslut]

No Matter What

Regine George x Reader

Word Count: 1.1k

Trigger Warning: insecurity

Request:

Valentine's / Follower Celebration Request; Regina George w/ quote 51 and piece of chocolate 5. Or: “In my opinion, the best thing you can do is find someone who loves you for exactly what you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome, what have you.” w/ arguing

Valentine's / Follower Celebration Requests are closed.

"So, what happened?" Cady asked as she passed (Y/n) the glass of water from her counter. What is usually the time that Cady takes to tutor (Y/n) has turned into a therapy session since (Y/n) and Regina are arguing. This was a very rare occasion as they typically settled things in private but Regina brought Karen and Gretchen into it, so (Y/n) has come to Cady. Hence why there was a math book and homework, that was twenty-five percent finished, scattered on the table.

(Y/n) accepted the water gratefully, sighing as she wiped the tears streaming down her cheeks. "I told her I felt uncomfortable with her relationship with Shane Omen. I never said they couldn't be friends. I wouldn't ever tell anyone who to be friends with or they couldn't be friends with. However, she does that for me all the time. That's why I felt like I had the right to at least let her know that the way she was still friends with her ex-boyfriend, the boy she cheated on Aaron with, makes me uncomfortable. Maybe I'm just insecure, but them having a relationship worries me." (Y/n) explained, hoping she didn't sound bitter.

There was a hum that escaped Cady as she listened, nodding carefully. (Y/n) She could see that she was thinking, which made her dread that maybe she had no one on her side. "I understand your worries. I wouldn't feel comfortable either. I think it's actually very healthy to establish boundaries. I also don't think it's fair that Regina has made you unfriend people and then get mad when you express your discomfort with her and Shane." Cady sat beside her, putting a comforting hand on her arm. (Y/n) felt validated by Cady's words, happy to finally have someone who sees the disagreement from her point of view.

"I feel like it wouldn't matter if she didn't cheat on someone else with him. I don't care that she's friends with Aaron or her other exes. It's just Shane." (Y/n) told Cady, leaning back in her seat. She felt a bit embarrassed by how insecure she was, but she knew Cady wasn't judging her. "I just sometimes don't even feel good enough for Regina. Then, I find out she's hanging out with Shane Omen. What am I supposed to think? I know it's bad for me. I'm supposed to trust her. I do trust her. I'm just being insecure. I just really love her."

Cady rubbed her back softly. She understood what (Y/n) was saying. Oftentimes, she felt insecure around the girls herself. But, she knew it was a different level since she was in an actual relationship with Regina. "In my opinion, the best thing you can do is find someone who loves you for exactly what you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome, what have you. I honestly feel like that is the love that you and Regina have. Maybe, you two just need to sit down, and maybe you can try to be vulnerable with her like you were with me." She offered softly.

She was right, too. (Y/n) and Regina did share a love that would overcome this. (Y/n) did love Regina despite all of her moods. She loved her in the morning when her hair was messy, she loved her in the afternoon when she was at lunch looking her most confident. "You're right," (Y/n) said softly, looking at her homework. "But first, I really do need help with my homework." They shared a small fit of laughter before Cady helped her finish her work.

After tutoring, she headed to Regina, wondering what she was going to say. Admittedly, (Y/n) felt a bit nervous. She wasn't the best at confrontation. That's why she sat in her car for ten minutes. Eventually, she pried herself from the driver's seat and made her way to Regina's front door. Before (Y/n) could knock or ring the doorbell, Regina opened the door with flushed cheeks. She stared at (Y/n) for a moment before running a manicured hand through her blonde hair. "I saw you sitting in your car for a while." She confessed, looking away a bit.

There was a moment of silence between the two of them, but there was no tension. It was just a thick heaviness of nervousness in the air. "I'm sorry," the two of them said in sync before laughing softly, a bit of awkwardness lifting off their shoulders. It was nice to see their anger over their last argument has finally worn off. (Y/n) always hated when Regina was angry, and Regina always tried to make sure (Y/n) was never angry. They worked together like that, always trying to protect each other's feelings while communicating and telling the truth. Sometimes, it led to little arguments, but the Shane Omen one was one of their bigger blow-ups.

Regina led her into the house, all the way to her room. "I want you to know that I cut off Shane. I realized that you had every right to feel uncomfortable. I'm sorry for invalidating your feelings the way that I did. I hope that you'll be able to forgive me." Regina said with a soft smile. (Y/n) only saw that smile when Regina was feeling vulnerable with her. Unlike (Y/n), Regina wasn't someone who wore her heart on her sleeve. So, when she apologizes, it means she took a lot of time out of her day to consider the things that have happened.

(Y/n) sighed, noticing that Regina's hand was taken into hers still. She laced their fingers together as she got the words sorted in her mind. "I'm sorry, too. I realized that I was just jealous and insecure. I trust you, and I should've made that clear. Instead, I let my fear control me." She explained, feeling tears brim in her eyes as she began to feel embarrassed again. She grew even more embarrassed when the tears began to fall down her cheeks.

Regina wiped the tears away softly, kissing (Y/n) gently on the lips. "(Y/n), I love you. No matter what I love you. I love so much it's crazy. You were valid to feel everything that you felt. The truth is, I should've cut him off a long time ago. None of this was fair to you." She said carefully, pulling away, but letting her hands stay to rub away any stray tear that continued to cascade down her girlfriend's cheeks.

There was a soft smile that pulled at the corners of (Y/n)'s lips as she sniffed. "I love you, too, Regina. No matter what." She said softly, moving in to kiss Regina once more.

[banquetwriter]

୨୧ distant love pt: 2 ୨୧

pairing: Rick Grimes ♡︎ fem!Reader

warnings: ୭̥⋆*｡ canon typical violence, Rick is low-key a cheater (not on reader tho), not beta read we die like Carl

summary: ʚ basically a filler chapter from the CDC to the prison post-Woodburyɞ

Words: 2002

An: hey babies I wrote this on my phone again 😔 also i haven’t seen the earlier seasons in a very long time so mb if it’s not exactly accurate 😔😔

Part 1 Part 3

You and Rick had kept your distance most of the morning. Looking at Shane’s black eye. “Dad, are you hungover? Mom said you would be.” Carl asks as Rick sits down at the table. You let yourself stifle a giggle at the kids' antics. Rick being drunk last night would explain his forward-ness.

You followed the group after breakfast as Jenner explained what exactly was happening to everyone. Why would the dead rise?

You watched as the x-ray video’s corpse re-animated. God that was scary. What was scarier was Jenner locking the doors. You covered your mouth as tears streamed down your face. “Oh my god.” you whimpered out.

You were going to die. You of course found yourself turning to Rick. Who was holding his wife and child? Your heart sinks.

Of course, he would be with them. You were a sidepiece. Why would he protect you? Care for you? He made his choice. It was one that you're going to have to be ok with. Even if you weren't going to live very long.

That's when the doors opened and Rick screamed for everyone else to get their stuff. You ran as fast as you could to escape. Avoiding the shards of glass that spilled everywhere Rick threw the explosive at the glass.

Your eyes rest on Lori and Rick as they sit in the front of the camper. You weren't sure how you could have ever found a real relationship with him. You think back to Lori’s words. Trying to push the two of you together. Your heart burned for her.

How low was she that she wanted her husband to sleep with another woman? You suppose she felt guilty for her and Shane being together. This was a different thought, wasn't it? Rick said he loved you. You weren't sure how much of that you believed.

It was you who saw the way Rick was after Otis accidentally shot Carl. It was you who hugged him, feeling his arms search for a sign that his boy was still alive. It was Rick who begged you to stay with him.

You wanted to, you really did. But that would have been inappropriate and unfair to Carl. This could very well be his last night alive. He shouldn't be confused about why you were there.

You see the color leave his face as he donates more and more blood to his son. Trying to comfort his wife but his eyes linger on your figure unfaithfully. Your curves would comfort him. Your soft skin and happy smiles. That's what he fell for.

He wished this wasn't the way it was. He wished he had met you instead of Lori. Marrying the first girl he could. I mean he did love Lori. As the mother of his children, he would always hold a place for her. She just wasn't you, was she?

You on the other hand shoved your feelings down, deeper than the Mariana trench. Trying to help keep the camp outside on Hershel's Farm going. Doing menial tasks like laundry or cooking. Offering to clean any weapons the group needed youto.

Trying to comfort Lori at every turn, silently becoming almost like a best friend to her. Holding her shoulders as if to say you're sorry for screwing her husband.

You used to help go on runs with Glenn and Maggie until you found them shaking up in the convenience store. It was cute to see young love budding, but seeing them naked was not something you were down to see again.

It made you jealous to see them so in love. You wished you and Rick could be that way. But alas, that's not what life has in store for you. Love. What a joke. A nimbly fickle thing.

You kept a good amount of distance between you and Shane. Not daring to go near him. One night you sat around the campfire with lori and carol. It had been a long day of playing catch-up with chores since Lori had been helping Carl rehabilitate.

“Alright girls, I'm off to bed,” Carol says with a tight-lipped smile. You and Lori talked a little bit about Glenn and Maggie.

“Y/n?” she asks looking up at you. Her gaunt and skinny face looks more and more malnourished these days. “Mm?” you ask, looking at her. “I-I know how he looks at you.” her voice barely above a whisper. You lick your lips, shaking your head.

“Lori, stop,” you ask her. Pleading almost. “You can't keep doing this to yourself, he loves you-” You try to keep your voice down but your heart breaks. “Y/n I'm pregnant,” she says.

For a second your world stops. The fires crackles keeping you grounded. You opened your mouth, unable to say anything. The amount of possible words dying in your throat. “I want it to be Rick’s. I need it to be Rick's,” she says, tears spilling down her face.

Your hands slip up to your face covering it. You let out a low breath. This wasn't about you. This was about her. You think over and over again trying to calm down all the raging emotions going through you.

“Does anyone else know?” you ask slowly, she must be feeling a whirlwind of things none of which you were entitled to have an opinion on. “Glenn does, I needed him to go out n get the tests,” she whispers straightening out her shirt, raising her hand up to her mouth and biting her nails.

Lori is absolutely exhausted, and you know more than ever she should be resting. You stay silent noting that neither potential fathers know she is pregnant. “I don't know what I'm going to do, Glenn has been trying to take care of me.” She gives a pitiful smile.

Her face was tear-stained, the streaks illuminated by the fire. “Well you need prenatal care no doubt.” you said scooting closer to her, grabbing her hands. “I think telling everyone will be the best course of action, when…” you said, pulling her into a hug.

“When you're ready,” you mumble against her shoulder. She thanked you with a sad smile standing up. You didn't sleep well that night. Not that you ever did now. You thought about the women in the next tent over probably also not sleeping.

You thought about the baby that was currently draining her of her energy. You thought of Carl. Recovering from a gunshot wound at such a young age, probably confused and scared most of the time.

And of course you thought of the man also sleeping in that tent. The one that seemed to consume your every thought. You thought of him always. It was a shame. You wished you were Lori sometimes. Sleeping in his arms pregnant with a baby.

You physically shake your head to rid yourself of your selfish thoughts. You were scared of Shane, scared of your feelings for Rick, and scared for Lori.

You were scared of the way your heart wanted to leap out of your chest every time Rick tried to talk to you. The way his rough hands would touch the soft skin of your arms. “Rick…” you breathe out trying to shy away from the older man.

The way he would beg you to stay close to him, his hot breath tickling your neck at his closeness. “This isn't the right time Rick.” you would whisper, eyes flicking up to see his teary ones.

Dark almost permanent circles surrounded his eyes. You pull away from his grasp and run out of the Greene’s house. You stood by Daryl's side as you read him shitty books you found on runs trying to provide him an ounce of comfort as he recovers from the bullet wound that Andrea gave him.

And be would try and provide an ounce of that comfort to you as the barn full of walkers is discovered. Taking all of your willpower not to vomit at the smell. Turning away from the group. Allowing yourself a moment, just a moment of selfish comfort.

As Rick’s arms wrap around you. Breathing in his musky scent. The sounds of the guns firing off still ring in your head. “It's ok, you're going to be ok,” Rick mumbles in your ear. His hand clasped gently in the back of your neck.

As soon as the moment is here it's gone as you see Shane’s angry face peering at the both of you from a few feet away. Your face fills with embarrassment, you rip away from his embrace instead choosing to hug Carol who was sobbing over the loss of her daughter.

You spent the next few days in a constant state of dissasostivate numbness. Unable to feel anything other than fear. Seeing Rick and Shane keep a man locked up in the barn for fear of what he could do.

Even though your group was the one keeping him held, handcuffed, and bound. As soon as he goes missing it seems to bring you out of your state as Shane comes running with a broken nose claiming that the prisoner ran away.

You ran into the house with all the women. Fearing for what was next. Trying to hide in case he came back with his group. Seeing all the panic spread through the group as the barn is set on fire. The horde of walkers attacking your slice of peace.

You barely make it out with your lives. Reconnecting with your group on the highway with everyone. Once again seeing Rick’s eyes falling on you as he hugs you with his family. You turn away from him, finding comfort in Daryl's embrace.

You watched as Rick distended into madness and anger after killing Shane. Demanding that whatever he said went. This was not the man you fell in love with. This was not the human your body craved comfort from.

Revealing how his son had to be the one to put his best friend down after he turned into a walker. Which was bizzare you never took him for type to get bit or even scratched.

That's when Rick reveals the delicate information that you all carry the virus. A crucial piece of information that sends the group into a frenzy of anger. You felt very sick. How could he keep that from you? From the group?

It only went downhill from there. Rick and Lori are always fighting as she grows more and more pregnant. The sheriff was unable to hide his anger towards her. Constantly on the run, even once you find and fortify the prison, the Governor and all of his bullshit wreaks havoc on the group.

It's been 6 months since Woodbury fell, you had a big group. Full of amazing people. A decent farm and garden. Life was decent. Judith was a beautiful baby girl.

You sighed setting your pencil down in the crease of your sketchbook. You had picked it up on a run not too long ago, at first mostly making a few sketches and doodles to entertain Carl.

Although lately, you have been trying to work through your feelings through the pages of the book. Unfortunately, most of them were about Rick. You always observed him when he was working in the fields.

You could almost see the heat radiating off of him. His t-shirt is clinging to his sweaty body. To his strong sculpted muscles. Fuck. He was so hot.

It brought you back to those nights in the quarry. His rough hands gripped your soft flesh. Back arching as you slammed into him. Tongues slipping into each other's throats.

You lick your lips slightly admiring your drawing. It was of a man who looked suspiciously like Rick. His tired haunted face and sculpted body were barely covered. “Hey.” a southern voice took you away from your explicit drawing.

You look up to see the man in your drawing staring right back at you.

[cleolinda]

My sister noticed

Previously on: I grew up in a haunted house and I didn't notice: So I told you a story about how a Count Chocula used to creep behind me at night when I was a child, and I described my very weird childhood home to you. I told you how my sister had Something Dark living in her bedroom, and I told you about the time she and I compared notes and realized that we also had the ghost of a young woman in the house. Maybe.

I asked my sister to read over the draft for me, maybe gather up the fortitude to fill in some details, and she texted back, "Oh, I'll tell you anything you want. But that’s not how it happened."

I am willing to believe her version for two reasons:

1) My memory has been shit after having covid umpteen thousand times.

2) I actually remember her version of the conversation we had, now that it's in front of me.

I also remember my version, is the thing—the one where I told her about Rebecca when we were younger. And that raises some questions about how independent, how uncompromised, our experiences were. But I think those questions are themselves the story. Can I trust my memory at all? I had such bad brain fog the first time I had covid that I could not remember how to scramble eggs. A lot of things are just mist to me now. There's what I remember and there's what actually happened, but what do I even remember? And that's before you even get into the idea that we're talking about ghosts we "felt" in the house. We saw no apparitions, no shadows, no odd movements.

This is not a story where I'm asking you to believe me.

There are things you experience, and things that happen. An example from the winter of 2016:

What I experienced was standing out on our deck one night and looking up at the stars. They were moving in a slight swirl motion, not unlike the painting Starry Night. I turned to my mom and said, "Well, the stars are moving, so if the world ends or something any time soon, here's our first sign." She stared at me.

What happened was, our upstairs heating unit had a leak, and I sustained mild carbon monoxide poisoning. (I like rooms to be cool, so I had used the heater less than most people would, at least.) This was only discovered during a routine furnace check, after my vision had been a little weird and I had been deeply fatigued for two or three months. I have had a CO monitor upstairs ever since.

Did I see the stars swirling? Yes. Were they? No. That's the distinction I want you to make while I tell you all this. Did my sister and I experience things? Yes. Do I know what happened? No.

So what I agree happened was, we were having Grownup Sunday Family Dinner a few years back, maybe 2019 or so. I had been really into Buzzfeed Unsolved, which later evolved into Watcher Entertainment, but my sister was refusing to watch any of it. She's a big fan now, but she only started watching the guys last year. Yesterday, we tried to piece this back together via text.

My sister ["MS" from here on out]: Like I feel like off and on for years you mentioned [Shane and Ryan's shows] and I refused

MS: And one day my argument was to talk about our own house

Me [let's go with Cleolinda Jones, "CJ"]: You said you felt like fake ghost shows were disrespectful to people who actually experienced [hauntings].

MS: YES I FEEL LIKE THAT WAS THE CONVO

I love paranormal investigation shows, whether they're patently fake or not, as long as I enjoy the people investigating, so I couldn't understand why they personally offended her. Pulling at this thread back in 2019 is how the the whole ghost story started coming out.

CJ: And I was like, okay, but here’s one show where they get, like, nothing, but I can promise you that it's real

(Because the Unsolved/Watcher shows pair a believer with an actual skeptic who still, lo these many years later, does not believe in any of it. I truly believe Shane and Ryan would not stage "evidence," for that reason. Shane makes fun of ghosts and people who believe in them, but he's honest about it, and my sister likes that.)

At this point, we go back to the first version of the story that I posted: my sister had told me that Something had lived in the Four Closets Bedroom with her when she was a preteen/early teenager. It felt very dark, very bad, and she had not told anyone else about it until that dinner. The way I relayed it to you, Dear Reader, was that she hadn't wanted to go into detail, and I wasn't sure what it looked like, or if it "lived" in the little witch closet, or what. That night at dinner, I had gone on to tell her that, you know, now that you mention it, I did feel like something used to follow me up there at night. And this was when "My sister started crying. Like just staring at me in wide-eyed horror, her eyes filling with tears" had come in.

1. Something Dark

CJ: So you were telling me about our house being haunted. Something in your room. How would you describe it?

MS: I think it more lived in the attic

(our pal the dark fucked-up attic room)

MS: but would roam the entire floor so I felt it in the peach room [my (Cleo's) old bedroom and then later, my sister's] but more so in [the Four Closets Bedroom] as it was closer to the attic

MS: The best way I can describe it is just never feeling like I was alone. Feeling like something was always behind me. But I refused to turn around to look. It felt like a darkness that almost oozed behind you in a way that was almost suffocating.

CJ: What I find interesting is that we both describe it as Just Feelings, and never feeling alone.

My sister texted me at this point that she used to sense Something upstairs whether it was day or night; "even in the day, it didn't feel safe." But night was worse.

MS: There was one night in 3rd grade when I was reading and had like my first panic attack because I was newer to living upstairs and I felt it come in the room at night for the first time

MS: I also used to feel compelled to keep the AC running all night like it was never cold enough.

Here's the weird thing: when we moved to the house where I currently live and our rooms were on the same floor, we always fought over the thermostat. My sister hated her bedroom being too cool, whereas I get hot. I remember one night, we were arguing over it, and she was weirdly on the verge of tears: "Why do you have to have it so cold?" In 2023, my sister texted me at this point that she didn't want our childhood home to be cold; it was like the thing wanted that temperature, even if she hated it.

You often hear that ghosts make rooms cold, that's a big ghost hunter show thing—but whatever was up there couldn't lower the temperature on its own?

CJ: "If you can’t make it cold yourself, storebought is fine"

CJ: And you don’t have a visual impression of it, I’m not just blowing past that?

MS: I refused. REFUSED to look. Ever. For any reason.

CJ: I did too, so that’s interesting

CJ: I describe it as a Count Chocula, which should tell you how much it didn’t bother me. Which I find weird

(Truly, there is a reason I titled that post "I grew up in a haunted house and I didn't notice.")

MS: I can’t tell if it was truly terrifying. Or if the amount of data I was getting from it was just so overwhelming that that alone was terrifying to a child. I wish I could answer that now.

CJ: Yeah, in some way I think we’re saying the same thing. I was seven years old and I couldn’t comprehend what it was, either, so I just imagined a silly vampire

CJ: like I can’t overstate how cartoonish it seemed to me at the time, while still being very DON’T LOOK BACK

Part of the problem, she added, was that she felt compelled to go turn down the air conditioning... and the thermostat was next to the (carpeted. shag carpeted) bathroom. And then she had to race back to her bedroom... the same way I used to, as quick as she could.

MS: I also felt like I could NOT run. Like the way you shouldn’t run away from a mountain lion. It would create the need for it to chase me.

MS: What is so strange is that [learning about paranormal investigation] has not changed my perception of my experience in the slightest. Whether that’s the reality or not. It is still something I find dark and terrifying.

CJ: I think you would answer this differently now than you did then: what do you think it was?

We discussed this by text for a while. I mentioned being intrigued that Something Dark wanted to be cold (but apparently was not able to make the room cold). My sister—having agreed to be quoted here—said, "I kinda hope to avoid someone being like 'you had a demon in your house,'" as she doesn't really feel like that's what it was. Her gut feeling (and, bear in mind, we are working off nothing but feelings here) is that it was a spirit or ghost: something formerly human. We agree that it seemed male in some way (again: a Chocula).

And you're probably thinking, This is total bullshit. And it probably is! I'm not claiming any of this to be real evidence! I just find it interesting that we somehow came up with the same bullshit.

CJ: It just fascinates me that I did not experience 90% of this, and yet I got a strong enough whiff of it that I’m like, yeah, I can see it

But what about the female presence, the one I went off to color with in the middle of the night?

2. Rebecca

MS: I didn’t find out you had done the ouija board until we were adults. You didn’t tell me when we were kids

MS: That’s why I was SO shocked when we talked at the dinner table.

See, I was convinced that I had told her about my ouija adventures when I was a teenager, and "What about Rebecca??" flowed really well in the first post. That conversation was already a bit fictionalized in order to condense it from what I remembered—that's how memoirs work, really, unless you have actual transcripts of your life and room to include them. You're telling a story. I thought I was telling a condensed version of a true story. And yet, I do remember how shocked my sister was at dinner that night. And she would have only been seven or eight when I was messing around with that shit. Those two things do support the idea that I wouldn't have told her.

MS: You did tell me skeletons lived in my closet tho

I told you I was kind of a shit.

CJ: when I told you about Rebecca, what was your reaction?

MS: That’s when I went white. Bc I realized we had had a similar experience and I wasn’t just crazy

CJ: The thing is, I WOULD HAVE SWORN I had told you about Rebecca when we were younger

MS: If you did you didn’t name her and that’s why it was nuts when I realized 2 decades later we pulled the same name and we both remembered it.

We did it again, too—I posted briefly about putting this whole saga together, and how my sister asked me to give the ghost a pseudonym (ghosts deserve privacy too). And in trying to think of a good replacement, we both came up with "Rebecca."

CJ: so how did you know the [original] name?

MS: Ouija board with [best friend, redacted] in the playroom when I was like 13. She cried the whole time. We both thought the other was moving [the planchette].

You'll remember the weird, windowless, sky-blue playroom with the scary door from the previous post.

MS: But she was crying so she wouldn’t have been. And I would have never pulled out the name [Not Actually Rebecca]

MS: There was part of me that wonders if I did it but I would have NEVER chosen Rebecca

CJ: So did I bring Rebecca up first in this conversation [at dinner in 2019], or did you? I did?

MS: You said it first. I would have never [told you first] cuz I would have thought you were placating me. Like I’d never really know if you weren’t just agreeing with me

And that's when my sister had "stared at me, saucer-eyed, pale. Like I'm not sure I had ever seen anyone 'go white' until that moment." And I had told her about getting up at midnight and going to color in the weird playroom, and someone else being in there with me, no big deal.

After all this discussion, we do think that Rebecca was briefly my "imaginary friend," but our mom told me to stop talking about that. Not because our mom was spooked, but because she felt like it was rude for me to talk about someone I was presumably making up in front of company. So that stopped. Thinking back on it, I just felt like someone was sitting next to me on the couch. I didn't feel anyone next to me; when I looked, I felt like I could see where... someone was not? The space that someone invisible was taking up? It felt like something reasonably friendly. "Chill" is the word I keep using. Not super eager or possessive, just like a girl who was a bit older, maybe a teenager, a babysitter age, who liked me well enough. There was some dark shit in the attic, apparently—it did feel very oppressive in there—but I would get a sense that a metaphorical desk lamp had been turned on. A presence that stayed back, relaxed, but emanated "hey, I'm here."

What my sister and I agreed on was that we remembered how these "feelings" were both vague and memorable. I can't remember events or chronology accurately, but I remember the actual sensations and presences very, very clearly. They resist reinterpretation. I can't sit here and say, "Oh, Rebecca was totally a guardian angel, I see that now." The Something Dark sounds functionally demonic, but my sister doesn't feel like that's accurate. (If anything, she gets a sense that this could have been a malicious uncle—not father—of some kind to Rebecca, if the two beings were related: particular in their vagueness.) These two presences just... were. My sister says she primarily sensed Rebecca outdoors in our backyard, when we were pretending (were we?) to play with fairies. I didn't sense Rebecca there—but then, I wasn't aware that what I sensed was a someone, not for another thirty years or so. My oblivious ass was up at midnight filling in my She-Ra coloring book with a ghost like, "Yeah, I'm alone in the dark for no reason, this is normal." It's only in retrospect that I recognize atmospheric feelings as things that actually took up space, and I don't know how I didn't see it at the time. I can't explain that, and I can't ask you to believe it. All I know is that my sister still feels very traumatized by her experience of it—and I can't explain why I don't.

I think one of the reasons paranormal investigation shows don't scare me a whole lot is because so much of the "evidence" is random knocks and creaks and movements and vibes, and I'm like, yeah, I've lived in two houses now like that. The door of my current bedroom opens and closes on its own all the time. It's probably a draft from the ventilation system (which does not have CO leaks anymore) (probably). I've seen something at this house that a lot of people might call a shadow person, but I was probably imagining it. So many of these ghost shows just have things that I grew up with and didn't even think a whole lot of at the time; I seem to be protected by a +3 Sphere of Sure, That's Fine. Is my current house also haunted? I honestly don't know. Would I notice if it was?

[stardew-shitposterino]

Stardew Valley Random Shane Headcanons

Since I’m incapable of thinking of any other bachelor in the game, here are some random headcanons for our best chimcken boi

-slight nsfw at the bottom- -MINORS DNI-

-Shane broke his nose on multiple occasions. Gridball field, college party or bar fight, you name it. Therefore, he has a big bump on his nose. But it suits him and who is he to care too much about his looks.

-Him and Emily briefly dated in college but broke it off fast as they realised they just care about each other platonically and not romantically, not to mention sexually. They remained friends though as it ended on good terms and are best buds still, almost 10 years after they’ve met. Now Emily is more a sister to him than anything else.

-this man LOVES affection, but he won’t admit it for the life of him, at least not right away. Banter, gifts, hugs, cuddles, CUDDLES, he is in for it. Even when you just met and he tells you to fuck off, deep down he hopes and aches for a decent soul in this god-forsaken town that he reluctantly calls a home, but his inner critic tells him to get wary and keep his guard up. It takes a lot of persistence and time till he finally decides to ignore his fears and let someone into his life, let alone admit that he likes someone’s company.

-speaking of hugs, he gives the best god-damn hugs for someone who pretends to hate physical affection. Hands down no one can do it better. Especially if you’re shorter than him (which can be a challenge since he’s a certified short king), he loves to drown you in them, quite literally.

-he’s quite the connoisseur when it comes to extraordinary food combinations, especially when it’s spicy. He usually eats his same microwaveable meals out of laziness, but he won’t say no to visiting new restaurants or trying new recipes with you. Sometimes the combinations he comes up with are quite frankly abominable, but he enjoys it, and he can take your criticism by calling you “uncultured” in return.

-should have been up there with the hugs one, but he is a soft boi. He has let himself go quite a bit since his gridball days, but his muscles restore fairly quickly once he does anything remotely physically challenging. So in other words, he has some bigger muscles still (especially from stocking shelves all day), but they are covered in a generous layer of pudge. He’s build like a mini fridge with cushioning, and it’s perfect.

-huge metal head. He also loves punk and post punk music.

-on that note: he was a huge subculture fanatic in his youth but kept it under wraps as he feared to become an outcast in his jock circle of friends. He never gotten the chance to express himself the way he wanted to till Emily’s clothing therapy session.

-He rarely speaks about his special interests, and he has quite some next to chickens. Once you get to a comfortable closeness with him, he will babble on about his favourite things once they are brought up and shyly smile to himself as he explains to you why he loves them.

-this man FUCKED back in the day. Even before the incident with Jas’ parents, he always struggled with his mental health and self esteem, so getting wasted at college parties and taking home random women was no rare occurrence. He would do that till he moved to The Valley and had to take care of Jas. Abstaining from it was a necessary evil at first, but receiving endless love and admiration from that child made him realise that none of his flings amounted to the joy he feels when Jas laughs at one of his dorky uncle antics or when she tells him that she loves him before drifting off to sleep.

-He’s bi…yeah that’s basically canon but he only ever acted on it once when he secretly visited a punk concert. It was a pretty man with long hair who told him that he’s very cute. That night threw him in a confused bi crisis and he never felt anything like that for a man again, at least till he met your farmer if they happen to be male.

[hotxcheeto]

Hey girl, how are you?, I would like to ask for an fluff Headcanon on how Shane from The L Word would have a crush on the (G/N)reader, sort of how she would act with the reader and how she would declare herself to the reader, only do this if you feel comfortable , W love <3

━ 𝐒𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐄 𝐇𝐀𝐕𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐀 𝐂𝐑𝐔𝐒𝐇 𝐎𝐍 𝐘𝐎𝐔

𝙥𝙖𝙞𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜(𝙨) - Shane McCutcheon x G/N!Reader

𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨 - Cursing, slight angst?, pretty much all fluff

𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙤𝙛𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙 ? - Yeah/Nope

𝙖𝙪𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙧'𝙨 𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙚 - so sorry this look so longgggg!!! threw me back into my L Word phase though lmfaooo watching it as I write this.. much love!! &lt;3

Shane has a reputation, let's begin with that

you’re friends so I mean you already knew that part, you didn't have to friends with her to know that either, but it's also what kind of worried you about your growing crush on the girl

It's also what made you keep your feelings at bay, even going so far as to outright ignore them but what you didn't know is that Shane also had them

She isn't clear when her feelings began to arise though, just that the day your ex cheated on you was the day that something changed, obviously, but it didn't have to do just with your breakup

She realized how seeing you talk about your crappy ex and complain after she brought over every breakup remedy she could find to your house made her feel

It made her feel like she could do better because you deserved so much better, you were an amazing friend to her and you were always there and ready to comfort her when she needed

You were so amazing.. and a beautiful person.. and awesome... and oh shit she's attracted you

Like really attracted, and it's pretty obvious to everyone but you

It's like a switch is flipped and suddenly she can't stop staring at you, admiring you, smiling all cheesy when you do something mundane but she just thinks it's so adorable

Imagine folding laundry while Shane eyes you from the other couch while talking, yeah, she's down that bad

You and Dana are probably the only two that can't hear Alice screeching, always the last to know

Smiles so much around you it's insane, and Shane already kind of has this resting smirk face but with you it's not a smirk... it's a corny, wide grin that makes her cheeks hurt

She usually doesn't smile like that either

God it makes her feel dumb

Alice knows and so does Tina who randomly starts pushing you towards romance and trying a bit too hard to figure your type

Alice even made a questionnaire for you to get you back into dating but everyone shut it down as soon as the first three questions came out

Shane is also naturally touchy, but with you it's like it rises to a thousand

If you all ever sit down, she's sitting beside you even if she's gotta pull up a chair, making an excuse that she doesn't feel like walking around the table

The excuse is for you, everyone just raises their eyebrow

Shane will then probably put her hand on your leg whether it be your knee or thigh, doesn't matter and she does it sweetly without a second thought

Or maybe there's a million thoughts and she's internally panicking to read your reactions and glancing over at Alice a thousand times who only shrugged

You acted normally, Shane felt defeated, like a fucking toy soldier, or at least that's how it was described to the rest of the ladies

She also sits extremely close to you, like shoulders hitting each other type of close but that's just because she likes seeing you get flustered and giggle when she whispers shit to you to tease you or make fun of someone in public

She'll even talk to you before her morning shot, that's when you know it's serious

Shane also likes to pay for you, kind of forces it on you if we're being honest, she just throws the money on the table and grabs you to leave while your not even sure what's happening until you're out the door

She just wants to take care of you, you're her sweet, pretty, thoughtful friend after all, mind as well make sure you're well taken care of

You sure take care of her when she's having girl troubles, which makes it even harder for her to tell you

Besides she likes seeing you get fake angry about her always covering the bill

Will platonically hold your hand, because y'know, you're besties, everyone in the group does it, obviously you guys would do it too

But something happens during all the hand holding and hang outs and Shane starts getting closer, testing the waters if you will, she's confident

But she's also terrified of fucking up your friendship cause y'know, she adores you

Taking a chance though is something she specializes in and so she does, getting more romantic and breaking away with the platonic friendship bullcrap

Kissing your cheek when leaving, always having an arm around you ( more than usual ), giving you little kisses on your forehead or neck while laying in bed while just 'hanging out'

It was a small affectionate habit but becomes more frequent and you definitely notice but much to Shane's displeasure you don't say a thing

At first you think it's just Shane being Shane until the other ladies start asking if you guys are a thing and you just think they're being ridiculous, Shane acts like she has a thing for everyone

Doesn't help you both are so close all the time but that's because you're best friends

It makes you really confused and you even start to accidentally distance yourself from her to try and help to feelings ease

Whatever feelings those are because you're still not entirely sure what you're feeling

So Shane does what Shane thinks she should do

Panics and calls the entire group together because who the fuck else is gonna tell her to shut up and get her act together

She wants to ask you out but let's be honest, it's you and not some random hook up that went too far, you're her best friend and if this gets screwed up...

In her mind it's make or break

Alice leads the entire conversation by telling Shane to just ask you out because the worst you could say was no

So there Shane goes, ready to knock on your door with an entire speech made up in her head but as soon as you open it she just blanks

Completely forgets what Tina and Bette told her to say, all of Dana and Alice's advice and every detail Kit had added to sweeten it up

Blushed when you laughed and invited her in and then it all just comes out like a mess of words

You're just nodding along until the weight of what she was saying really fell on you and you just go silent

It was an entire declaration wrapped up in a few seconds before you both just stared at each other wide-eyed

You don't talk about either, it just kind of turns into a really messy make-out session that ends in a fit of giggles and a small chat about her little hype sesh before she got there

Let's just say you found that amusing

[bluecollarmcandtf]

Guard Duty

I caught Shane dozing off at the security desk while working late one night. He was the night guard I hired after the building was broken into. Needless to say, I was not happy.

"Shane!" I roared.

He almost slipped out of his chair as he jerked awake.

"Napping? Is this going to be a problem?"

"No, Mr. Isaac," he jumped to his feet, "I'll walk the building right now."

My pathetic excuse for a guard scrambled to collect the flashlight and keys I issued to him, but I wasn't convinced. In my experience, guys that were unreliable once would be unreliable again. Guys that were especially young and attractive like Shane were even more likely to be slackers.

"No," I snarled.

The new hire looked at me wide-eyed, clearly afraid he was about to be fired.

"Get over here," I tapped my foot.

The young man reluctantly stepped up, standing before me with a pitiful expression.

"I'm not going to fire you, Shane."

"Thank you, sir," he sighed in relief, relaxing with a dopey grin, "It won't happen again."

"No, it won't."

I pulled a long chain out from beneath my button-up shirt, revealing a heavy ruby pendant that caught all the light in the dark building. Shane had no idea that the gem on this necklace carried a certain quality with it. People who find themselves staring at it too long left their minds open for anyone to go poking around in, and I was intent on poking around in Shane's.

The young man was wide open within seconds of gawking at my pendant. Anything I told him would be accepted by his brain as undeniable truth.

"Shane, you are going to take this job as night security very seriously," I instructed his subconscious, "This job is your identity now. You think of yourself as the security guard here, even when you're not on a shift. It is just the perfect encapsulation of everything you know about yourself. Isn't it?"

Shane's mouth drifted open as he took my words in. It wasn't long before some drool spillee out dumbly onto the uniform shirt.

"Since this job is the primary point of your life, you don't let anything get in the way of it. That means you make time to sleep 9 hours during the day so you come to work rested and alert. You're not going to doze off ever again when you're on watch, and you're not going to get distracted by anything either."

His eyes remained glazed and his body continued to hang limp, but I knew his brain was accepting every word.

"Since this is your career now, you are going to have to make some changes to better represent my company. That scruffy hair of yours will have to go. You keep your hair trimmed short and your face freshly shaven from now on. That's a better image for this position."

I began to imagine what he'd look like all cleaned up. He'd be a real guard for one thing, but he'd also be a hell of a lot more attractive: at least to me.

"You also always do what Mr. Isaac says without question. He is your boss so he tells you what to do. It doesn't matter if it's embarrassing, unpleasant, or impossible. You obey the man, and that just makes sense since you're his security guard."

I was starting to get a little worked up. The idea of this young guard obeying my every whim was giving me all sorts of fantasies. Every bone in my body was telling me to reach out and grope the dazed man through his uniform. I wanted to get to know the guy I hired a little better.

"But you prioritize your work. You love being a night guard. It gives you purpose. This is your life's calling after all, and there's no other job you'd rather have."

I can't resist any longer. My hands dart out and begin to feel his soft muscles beneath the shirt.

"But the job also turns you on. Nothing gets you more excited than protecting people: guarding them. You get hard putting on your uniform every night, knowing you're a good little security guard. You get hard the entire time you patrol the building because you are doing your job, and nobody is more passionate about it than you."

I was barely holding back anymore. My hands had migrated all the way around him to feel the ass beneath his slacks. Meanwhile, I began shamelessly kissing his parted lips. He had no idea any of this was happening, but I think he would've been happy his boss was paying this much attention to him.

"Alright, Shane," I continued between kisses, "You're going to wake up in a moment and forget everything that just happened, but the commands will stay."

I reluctantly pulled myself away from the new night guard, and tucked the pendant back into my shirt. With a snap of the fingers, Shane's eyes fluttered to life and he awkwardly wiped the drool from his lips.

"Mr. Isaac, like I said, I'm sorry about the slip up," he affirmed, "I can't tell you how important this role is to me."

"I think I get it," I answer, "Now get back to your guard duty!"

"Yes, sir!"

Glancing down I see his excited package straining against the fabric of his uniform pants. The tenting erection seems to not bother the guard as he marches down the corridor to begin his patrol.

I was looking forward to seeing a lot more of him around the building at night, now that he was so much more excited to do his job.

[bobbyseyesmile]

Attitude | Part 2

Summary: You learned your lesson to never run your mouth again. Or so Shane thought.

A/N: This is literally pure filth ok? And I love it. Also anal sex isn't as easy as it's portrayed in smut, pls don't forget that. This is purely fictional. Never ever have anal sex without proper preparation. also the lovely @angel-litter inspired me to write a third part so yeah, there’s more Shane coming ya way!

Characters: Dark!ShaneWalsh x Reader

Word count: 4k (sorry not sorry)

WARNINGS: age gap (reader is 18+) / explicit sexual content as in anal, oral (F receiving), swearing Trigger warning: dub-con | 18+ 🔞 MINORS DNI below the cut! 🔞

➻ Part 1 [M]

Weeks had passed and Shane couldn’t have been happier: Rick finally agreed to clean the barn from the walkers, everyone learned how to handle their guns properly and some of them, like Andrea, were actually pretty good shooters. It was good to have trained people around in case of an emergency.

And, of course, there where you; currently the most well-behaved angel there could have been. After the lesson Shane taught you a few weeks ago you barely looked in his direction, did everything when someone asked you to do it and remained quiet. Not one snarly remark or side-glance. So yeah, life’s been pretty good lately, or as good as it could be in this shitshow of world they lived in.

“Y/N?” your mother called and you turned around to see her standing at the porch of the white farmhouse. She just found out that she was pregnant and now her and your dad slept inside the house instead of the tent. You stayed back, happy to have some privacy for yourself as your mother got on your nerves more than ever. You were sure it was Shane’s child, everyone probably knew, even Rick.

Lori waved her hand to get your attention and you yelled a quick “Be right there” before she disappeared inside the house again. When she was out of your sight you let out an annoyed groan and rolled your eyes but as soon as you turned your head you saw Shane leaning against the RV, his arms crossed in front of his broad chest and he cocked an eyebrow when he noticed your disrespectful behavior. You gulped and quickly finished your chore before sprinting towards the house.

You did a good job avoiding him, too afraid he would keep his promise of teaching you another lesson. Even though you never experienced Shane like that before and the whole incidence was disturbing, to say the least, there was something that had changed; the way you looked at him from now on. Was he always that well-built? Did the veins on his arms and hands always pop out as soon as they were physically strained? And whenever he spoke, didn’t matter the words, you felt a slight tingle in your stomach area.

Disgusted with yourself you shook your head to organize your thoughts before facing your mom in the kitchen. “Yes, mom?” you asked and she turned around. “Baby, could you please gather everyone for dinner? Your father and Glenn are still on their supply run but I figured you could go with Shane to look for them, it’s getting dark.”

You stepped from one foot to another and rubbed the back of your head. “Why can’t Daryl go?” Lori noticed the reluctance in your voice but she just figured you were in a bad mood, typical for a young person.

“Because-“ she continued to chop the vegetables “Daryl’s still recovering from his wound and shouldn’t strain himself for another few days.”

Oh yeah, you forgot… He fell from a horse and put an arrow through his shoulder. A snort escaped you as you remembered when he told you what happened, you felt bad for him, you really did, it was still kinda funny to imagining the Daryl Dixon falling off a horse.

“Okay but I don’t think Shane’s going to like the idea of another two people going out after dark…” you tried once again and saw as she stopped in her motion. “It’s your father, Y/N.”

She couldn’t see it so you rolled your eyes once again. Sure, the man you cheated on and got pregnant by his best friend. Mother and wife of the year…

“Fine-“ you sighed “I’ll ask Shane.”

The mere thought of being alone with him again made your stomach turn. He acted like nothing ever happened except giving you here and there a warning glance before returning to his old self. Asshole…

“Shane?” you said when you walked towards the open RV and heard a grunt from within. You stopped in front of the open door not wanting to be alone with him in such small space once again. “You in there?”

“Yeah.” Seconds later he appeared in front of you, his blue shirt unbuttoned and you quickly licked your lips when you stared at his exposed abs. “What is it?” he asked impatiently when he noticed your stare. Your eyes fluttered shut before looking up to meet his. “Uhm… Lori wants us to go look for dad and Glenn.”

“Thought I told ya not to call her Lori, didn’t I? She’s your mother.” You withheld the urge to roll your eyes at him and gulped to suppress the anger pooling in your stomach. You’re not my fucking father and I also fucking hate you, you thought to yourself but none of those words went over your lips. You just nodded and asked a small “So?” instead.

“Yeah, lets go.” He sighed before grabbing his gun and walking towards the car. ”Got ya gun?” you replied with a bored “Hmmm” but flinched when Shane suddenly stopped to face you.

“Use your damn words, girl. What are ya, five?” he grunted and grabbed the gun from behind your pants. “And I fricking told ya to put it in the holster, not your goddamn pants, you know what could happen if it goes off?”

“As if you cared…” you mumbled but bit your lips when you saw his annoyed expression. “Shut it, I don’t have time for your hormonal whining, this is grown up business. If ya can’t handle it then go back inside and chop some veggies with the others and I’ll go alone.”

Shane studied your face and saw the tears forming in your eyes but he simply couldn’t care, this was life and death and not prom and Friday-pizza-nights or whatever shit ran through your mind. He need to keep you safe and alive; he didn’t matter if you hated him for it. “I got it.” You answered through clenched teeth and he stared another five second at your before finally giving the gun back and getting into the car. You took a deep breath and tried to remain as calm as possible but the truth was, your blood was boiling.

You drove only for about ten minutes before you ran into your father and Glenn as they were on their way home. Rick gave Shane a small nod and Shane turned the car to drive back to the farm. You let out a small sigh and were glad when Shane didn’t notice it but your eyes kept staring at his fingers around the steering wheel; the same fingers which painfully grabbed your hair and kept your head in place as he fucked your face.

Shane noticed your glance and turned his head to meet your eyes; you didn’t look away but continued to stare at him like a doe that got caught in spotlight. He couldn’t make sense of your behavior towards him; some days you seemed almost scared and avoided him completely (just as he thought you would react after what he did) and other days you practically couldn’t get enough of him, always staring or biting your lip whenever he caught you. Only thing missing was the drool coming from your mouth.

“Want a picture? It last’s longer, princess.” He snorted and as soon as you saw the smirk around his lips you quickly looked away. “Shut up-“ you mumbled embarrassed and tried to hide your reddened cheek from his sight.

“Aw come on, ‘was just joking, don’t be like that.” He laughed and tried to poke your side. “Stop!” you squeaked and swatted his hand away which made him chuckle even more.

“You’re actually pretty cute when you’re not a bitch, ya know.” Your head snapped towards him and he grinned when he saw your angered expression. “You have no idea what I’m like when I decide to be a bitch.” You spat and made him snort in return.

“Actually, I caught a glimpse of her a few weeks back but strangely she’d never appeared again. Hm, don’t know why.” You felt the heat in your face and ears as he nonchalantly hinted on the incident in the RV and held back from striking the back of his head, he probably would have killed you right then and there. Shane notice the way you clenched your fist in a pathetic attempt to hide your anger.

“I think you should stop or else I’m going to tell my dad.” You said calmly before quickly exiting the car as soon as he stopped at the farm. Shane watched as you slammed the door shut and took fast and long strides towards the house, probably too afraid of his reaction. Coward, he thought and got out of the car as well.

“What happened?” Rick asked and turned to look after his daughter who seemed aggravated.

“Ah, you know. Probably that time of the month.” Shane answered calmly and his best friend nodded in return. “I heard that women adjust their cycles if they live together long enough.” Glenn mumbled and earned himself some looks from the older men. “What?”

“Ya know, boy-“ Shane spoke and put an arm around the younger one “You’re so lucky that you’re one of the last fellows around and Maggie likes you.” Glenn raised his eyebrows and Rick laughed in return as the walked towards the house to finally eat dinner.

Everyone sat around the huge table and chattered to their hearts content except you who only picked in the food on your plate. Shane sat across from you and gave your knee a soft kick under the table. You looked up and he mouthed a silent “Stop that” signaling you to behave and to eat your food like a normal person.

“Bite me.” You whispered back but it was loud enough for your mother to hear. “Y/N! I don’t want you to talk to anyone like that. Apologize.”

“I’m not a kid anymore, mom. I apologize if I want to.” You answered and an uneasy silence spread in the room. “Y/N…” Rick spoke softly and your expression turned soft. “But dad, it’s true. I’m so sick and tired of her treating me like a child!”

“Yes, I know, honey but-“ your fathers soft spoken words were cut off by Shane’s harsh ones: “Then maybe act like your age instead of a bratty and whiny little kid.”

You turned around and gave him an infuriated look. “Excuse me but this is family business and you are not family, okay? Just because you fucked and impregnated my mother doesn’t make you family so back off!” The last words came out louder than you intended to but it felt so good to finally acknowledge the elephant in the room. You saw the hurt in your fathers eyes but it was time for him to learn that literally everybody knew. “Don’t gimme that look, dad. Everyone knows. We all knew way before you came back to us… I caught them in the woods a few times.”

“That’s enough, Y/N!” Lori suddenly yelled and you cocked an eyebrow. “That’s something we can agree on, mom.” You spat back before slamming the fork on the table and walking out the door, towards your tent.

You set up your camp inside the barn, it would be your retreat for the night, also it had a good outlook in case of some unwelcome guests. You were a pretty good sniper and were sure you could handle some walkers wandering around in the open field if they decided to come to close to the farm. Neither one of your parents tried talking to you after what happened at the dinner table and you were glad to be alone; all the rage still inside your guts.

You nestled inside the hay and closed your eyes after checking your surroundings one last time soon afterwards falling into a deep slumbers. Your precious sleep was disturbed as soon as you heard rustling noises outside the barn and the hand that grabbed the gun was immediately in position to put a bullet between two walker eyes if necessary. “Daryl?” you whispered because you remembered that he sometimes wandered around to check the areal but there was no answer. “Hello?” you asked once again and looked outside but everything was quiet. Maybe it was just the wind or some animal you thought and as soon as you turned around a giant hand grabbed you from behind, firmly pressed against your mouth to silence the scream inside your throat. You frantically tried to free yourself and remembered the gun in your hand but it was quickly taken from you.

“Sh-“ you suddenly heard and relaxed a little bit as you recognized Shane’s voice. The relaxation wasn’t long-lasting when you stared into dark pupils, his lips slightly agape and his right hand still grabbed the back of your head as his other hand kept your mouth shut. Shane saw the shift in your eyes; first there was the relief to recognize a familiar face but when your brain finally processed it, he could see the sheer fear in your eyes and honestly? He lived for it.

 “Just came to talk-“ he mumbled softly. Too softly. You gulped and blinked a few times, trying to come up with a plan; a way out of here but Shane knew exactly what you were thinking about and smirked. “Oh, princess, don’t be afraid-“ he spoke with false concern, his voice still as soft and smooth as butter but the grip of his fingers told you otherwise. Shane slightly moved his hand over you mouth when you started mumbling. “Hm, what was that?”

“I-I’m going to scream, Shane, if you’re-“ your words were cut off by his huge hand, once again firmly pressed over your mouth. There was a glimmer in his eyes and it made your stomach turn as he bend down, his lips softly hovering over your ear as he said:

“Oh, I know you will.”

Shane turned you around so your back was against his stone hard chest; while the hand over your mouth never left its spot his other arm wrapped around your frame like a boa constrictor pulling you harshly against him. A small whimper escaped your throat and Shane stopped in his tracks. “Was that a fucking moan I heard?” You reluctantly shook your head but he knew better, your body reacting almost on its own as it melted against his own. “Look at you, pressing your little ass against my dick, you fucking want this, huh? Where you a little bitch because you wanted me to fuck you?”

This time you didn’t shook your head nor nodded; truth was, you were confused on what you wanted. Your feelings for Shane were mostly pure hate but his body was to die for.

“Fucking answer me-“ he growled next to your ear and you immediately shook your head; no, you didn’t do it on purpose, he was the one that went too far meddling in your family business. You just told him, simply as that. “Bet you thought I wouldn’t repeat what I did to you before, bet you thought you were safe…” you felt his lips against your neck and closed your eyes. “But I also bet you liked sucking my dick. Tell me, how many nights were you lying awake playing with yourself wishing it was me?”

You remained quiet as you didn’t want to give him the satisfaction that he was absolutely right. Shane removed the hand over your mouth but grabbed your hips instead. You slightly turned your head to look towards the big barn door, trying to calculate if you could be fast enough to run but he just chuckled. “Come on, try running. I’m just going to fuck you in the grass so everyone in their tents can hear you.”

That was something you definitely didn’t want, inside the barn there was at least some privacy. Your thoughts were interrupted as you felt Shane’s hand reaching inside your jeans, slipping inside your panties and your breath hitched. Maybe this wasn’t so bad, you were hot for him after all and something told you that Shane wanted you as well, not only to teach you a lesson but because he had it as bad for you as you had it for him.

Shane felt your body relax as his fingers dipped into your already wet folds, giving your clit a lazy swirl making you moan in the process. “Shit, you’re such a little whore for me.” Your head nodded on its own as you rocked your hips against his fingers, relishing in the fact that Shane actually touched you.

Your breath was suddenly squeezed from your lungs as he harshly pushed you onto a nearby table, bending you over. “Shane-“ you gasped and heard him hum in return. Shane quickly pulled your jeans and panties down and stared at your small ass; it was pure perfection to his eyes. Art. Your eyes fluttered shut as you felt the rough skin of his fingertips on your sensitive skin, softly caressing and kneading the flesh in is hands. “So perfect.” He leaned over you and gave you a small kiss in your cheek making your heart melt in return; it wasn’t only hate you felt for the older man, the butterflies in your stomach made that pretty obvious.

The first slap on your ass took you completely by surprise and you let out a small shriek. There was a short pause before his hand curled around your neck, pushing your face deeper into the surface while he gave one harsh slap after another. You tried to scream but could barely breath, your fingers clawing into the wood beneath you desperately trying to hold onto something for support. Tears formed in your eyes and ran over your heated cheeks as Shane continued to abuse your already sore behind; one slap harder than the other till you were a sobbing mess underneath him.

“Shane, please-“ you managed to breath out but he didn’t care.

“Fucking told you what happens if you run that mouth again, told ya I would come for that sweet ass of yours.” He chuckled and finally stopped the abuse of your behind. He softly caressed the reddened and swollen skin, helping you relax a little bit. Your eyes were shut with tears still escaping as you silently cried. You were sure he would continue any moment but instead Shane kneeled down, spreading your cheeks and buried his face against your dripping cunt.

You gasped once again as you felt his tongue down there, turning you into a writhing mess. Shane licked, sucked and tongue-fucked your sex as he continued to merciless eat you out. “Fuck, Shane…” you moaned and felt him hum, the vibration sending shivers down your spine. It was almost too much; your ass that hurt like hell, his stubbly chin against your sex but his tongue that felt like heaven giving you a bittersweet experience you never felt before.

Shane could tell you were close as your hips began to quiver and your moans became more intense. His lips found your clit and gave it a strong suck as you came all over his face. He continued to eat you out even when you tried to get away from him but his fingers dug into your hips holding you into place.

You let out a relieved sigh when he finally let go. You couldn’t see it but Shane’s face was covered in your juices, making him lick his lips. “You taste so good, princess, almost came into my pants.” You tried to get up but Shane pushed you down, his hand resting on your back. “Oh, baby… we’re not done.”

“Shane?” you asked as you heard rustling noises as if he undressed himself all while holding you into place against the wooden table. Was he still going to fuck you? Was this really the night you’d lose your virginity?

You felt as he pulled his rock-hard member out of its fabric prison before poking it against your entrance but he didn’t enter yet, not before sliding it a few times through your throbbing pussy to gather enough slick. “Shane-“ you whined once again and heard him grunt in return. “Please-“

Just as your body started to relax his cock was suddenly gone from your throbbing entrance and positioned at your asshole. Your eyes widened in shock as realization hit you; he would fuck your ass.   “Shane, what are you doing?!” You asked panicked and felt the weight of his body on your own. “Teaching you another lesson. But this time you’ll remember for sure…”

You wanted to protest, to push him away as you were definitely not ready to take it there.

“Shane, wait, I never-“ His member slowly pushed into the tight ring of muscle as he covered your moth once again, this time to mask your screams for sure. His fingers found your clit as he drew circles over the still sensitive nub from your previous orgasm. “Fucking shit, so tight-“ he growled and your nails dug into the wood once again, this time you were sure it made you bleed. It took a few soft thrusts before the pain turned tolerable. Shane pulled slightly back before delivering a harsh thrust that knocked the air out of your lungs.

His cock entered you with such a force it literally threw your forward and your feet lost contact with the floor. You tried to grab something but your body just didn’t obey, your brain in a foggy haze as he kept fucking in you from behind.    

“Shit; how can it be so fucking tight?” he groaned and his fingers dug into the soft skin at your hips. It would leave marks; you were sure but couldn’t care less for now. With every harsh thrust his balls slapped against your throbbing clit making you close your eyes in pure bliss. You weren’t even sure how it was possible for him to be this deep inside you; his length made it seem impossible but your body proved you wrong as your hungry hole swallowed him; the grip around his dick so intense Shane felt his own release approaching.

Your eyes rolled to the back of your head and your mouth hung open for a silent cry, drool dripping down your chin and neck and for Shane it was the most beautiful sight; there you were, a drooling, moaning and writhing mess as he fucked your tight virgin hole. Your orgasm washed over you in intense waves; blood rushing in your ears as you came all over his dick. “Fuck!” Shane closed his eyes as well before his grip on your waist increased, threatening to break you in half as he fucked you through both of your highs. He gave one final thrust before he came hot and heavy, painting your insides white.

You didn’t know how long you stayed like this; heavy panting as Shane’s fingers still dug into your skin, his cock turning slowly soft. Shane pulled out and licked his lips as he saw his own cum dripping out of your ass and down your legs. Your legs felt like Jello and if it wasn’t for Shane, you surely would have collapsed. Shane bend down to give you an intense kiss, his teeth colliding with your own as his tongue dominated your mouth. You let it happen while your hands rested against his chest.

As he pulled away you let out a small whine and he smirked. “Hope ya learned your lesson.”

“Well…” you cleared your throat, voice all raspy. “Just because I made you cum doesn’t mean it wasn’t a lesson, ya know.” He spoke firmly but there was a hint of a smirk around his lips.

“Besides… you won’t be sitting for at least a week.”

You’ll only find my work posted here and and on my AO3 blog. I don’t give consent for my work to be re-posted (in any language) onto any other platform, even if it is with credit. Thank you.

[thosewildcharms]

If Lori had lived do you think Rick and Michonne would’ve still fallen in love? I’m sure most of us do but I’m curious as to how you see an alternate universe like that playing out? I feel like either Rick mirrors Lori and tries to sticks with marriage (either a broken or healing one) and as such it takes even longer for him and Michonne to connect. Or having Lori’s presence actually forces whatever grows between Rick and Michonne to be uncomfortably brought to the surface and instead accelerates their realization of their feelings. What do you think?

hey anon! these are all really interesting questions to think about.

i mean, i definitely think rick and michonne would have fallen in love anyway, and that was before the ones who live came into my house and said yes, definitively, they are soulmates and michonne is the love of his life.

i liked lori, and i think the amount of hate she gets can be unfair and sometimes uncalled for, but i also think she and rick were fundamentally incompatible and that michonne or no michonne, wouldn't have made it in the long run either way. in the very first scene of the show, rick tells shane that he and lori have been having a rough time, that she always seems pissed at him and he doesn't know why. this lack of understanding between them only seems to build over seasons 1 and 2, no matter how hard they're both trying.

that being said, i do think rick had every intention of trying to work things out with lori. he said as much when he was talking to her (to himself) on the phone after she died. specifically, he was going to get them safe first, and then he would "put it back together" as in, work on fixing their relationship. he was angry with her, and extremely hurt, but he still loved her, and at no point do i think he had ever really given up on her. that, i think, is part of why she haunted him for so long and why he felt so much guilt. he never really had a chance to tell her all of that before she was gone.

i don't know how long it would have taken them to call it quits had lori survived childbirth but i do think the chemistry and connection with michonne would have still established itself pretty quickly, and i think rick would definitely feel that innate understanding and connection in sharp contrast to how out of sync he and lori have always been. and i think lori would probably clock it as well. BUT, rick is no cheater - in fact, he's so honorable in that regard that i think as long as he was still focused on working things out with lori he would never let himself even think about going there with someone else. and for her part (and, from what I know, unlike her comic book counterpart but don't quote me on that) michonne would never get within a hundred feet of that situation - romantically - until it was completely resolved. this show doesn't really do love triangles (even shane/lori/rick wasn't so much a love triangle as it was a vehicle for rick's growth) so i think rick and lori's relationship would end and resolve itself on its own without any interference.

so with all of that in mind, i think rick and michonne would still have been a slow burn that matched pretty closely with what we saw in canon, except this time instead of rick having to get past the grief of losing lori, it would be just be the decline and resolution of that relationship that had he'd have to work through. while that was happening, i think rick and michonne would still naturally build their relationship, which would be platonic until it wasn't, just like in canon. for example, i think they'd still find it very easy to open up to each other, still be like-minded in most areas, michonne would still bond with carl. they'd still like being around each other and understand each other in ways no one else really could. and then they'd realize they were in love once they were safe and available to examine their own feelings. i think they'd still have been quietly and subconsciously in love with each other for a long while, but unready and/or unable to do anything about it until suddenly they were. so they could very much still mirror canon in that regard.

as for exactly how it would happen beat by beat, well. i'm no fanfic writer lol but i think there could be some subconscious yearning in there as well. as a treat.

[kyleoreillylover]

Ryan Bergara x Fem!Reader Headcanons

Summary: What’s it like being best friends with Ryan Bergara?

A/N: In my Ryan mood and I can’t resist not writing him anymore! I barely see any Ryan x reader fanfics so I had to write one myself!

If you were not already a Boogara, he would absolutely do anything to try and convince you to become one.

Sends you videos and calls you at 3 am to share “evidence” that he had.

“Ryan, I am trying to sleep!”

“I’m sorry, I just needed to show this to you before I forgot to!”

You forward the videos to Shane and he always responds either with a “😂” emoji or just full on making fun of Ryan.

It is funny either way.

Shane is your shared best friend.

He likes to tease you and Ryan.

But he loves when you gang up on Ryan with him.

And you both tease him.

Ryan acts like he hates it but he secretly loves that both his best friends get along and are besties 🥹🥹

Shane sees you like an annoying loving sister.

Ryan is definitely the more protective out of the two of you.

You are super chill, and one thing everyone can agree on is that you are one of the sweetest people ever.

But it does lead to you letting people walking over you sometimes.

But you have Ryan!! And he does not let that happen. He doesn’t hesitate to step in and check a bitch if he sees you uncomfortable.

He hates seeing the people he cares about being hurt or treated like crap.

When you are with Ryan you both feed into each other’s recklessness. You might be calm and chill, but when you are with him, it is like all your fears go away and you can let go of responsibilities and common sense!

It also helps that you trust each other with your life, so you know the other would never lead you to getting hurt.

It does lead into both of you doing stupid shit, though that Shane makes fun of you for.

One time you convinced him to do the handcuffed for 24 hour’s challenge for a video, and you both lost the key within an hour 😭

You are also the scriptwriter for Buzzfeed Unsolved/Watcher, so Ryan sometimes will come to your house with the both of you and staying up late until 2 am searching for information about a case/ location and cracking stupid jokes

You once woke up to him laying on top of you, you in his arms and laptops and papers scattered across the desks, and your legs tangled together and him snoring in your ear.

You grabbed your phone, took a picture, posted it on your story maybe knowing the internet would explode, then snuggled into him and went back to sleep.

You are not on camera that much, usually you are behind it with the crew, but Ryan begs you to at least do the Postmortems/Debriefs with him and Shane.

You are hesistant at first, what is the fans don’t like you? Or they think that you are trying to get in between the ghoul boys?

Ryan assures you that they will love you.

And he is right!

They end up loving you and your dynamic with Ryan and Shane!!

Which gives you the confidence to go with them to ghost and crime sites.

Every time Ryan felt anxious and fearful, he would look at you and see you behind the camera and that makes him feel 1000 times better.

And if it got to the point that he was freaking out and panicking(like that ep where Ryan was laying on the floor and Shane was trying to comfort him) you’d get out from behind the cameras and hug and comfort him.

Because you can’t stand to see him like that

“Breathe Ryan, you’re good. You’re safe. Just breathe.”

If you were staying at a haunted hotel, if everyone was sleeping in separate rooms, he’d FaceTime you the whole night

There’s no way in hell he’d sleep through the night, and Shane would make fun of him if he called hum throughout the night

You didnt even have to talk to each other, your presence was enough for him

He’d wake you up randomly though if he thought he heard something in his room 💀

“Y/N! Y/N, Are you awake??”

You groggily woke up, moving your phone away from your ear at Ryan’s screams.

“What?? What happened?”

“…”

You let out a sigh at his silence. “It was your shadow, wasn’t it?”

“…..Maybe? But I swear I thought I saw something move!”

You rolled your eyes at the camera. “Go to sleep Ryan.” You ignored his voice as you went back to sleep.

The internet ships you guys a lot

They tend to do that with most male and female friendships online tbh

And it doesn’t help that the both of you can’t help but be naturally affectionate to one another.

Whether it’s wrapping an arm around the others shoulder, jumping on Ryan, scaring him and forcing asking him to give you piggyback rides and him throwing you onto his shoulder as revenge, the fans will eat up every moment.

You guys just find it hilarious 😭 It becomes a game between you guys to try and make the fans go insane 😭😭

You guys are honest with each other all the time and are open books with each other. If you are feeling down, he can tell just tell, no matter how hard you try. If someone is not good for Ryan, you will straight up tell him. He trusts your judgment because he knows it’s coming from a place of love and you rarely steer him in the wrong direction.

You tried to teach him to cook once and he almost burned your house down 😭 So he just randomly comes to your house to eat your food because he swears your cooking is the best.

Makes fun of your height. You're taller than him? It doesn't matter, your still getting attacked lol. You're shorter than even? Even worse for you, you can't make fun of him at all without him calling you a dwarf at least once.

He is a gymhead (He's not Biceps Bergara for nothing) and makes you go with him all the time. He claims you need to get stronger in case someone tries to attack you but you think it's cause he likes to see you suffer.

You take the ugliest pictures of him known to existence. He tries to delete them but you just keep getting more (Shane sends a lot to you but Ryan doesn't need to know that)

Acts like he hates your music taste to annoy you but secretly loves it

He drives you everywhere because you are quite literally the worst driver he has ever seen.

"Slow down, slow down, you almost hit that car!"

"It's not my fault they were in the way!"

"The light turned red and it was their turn!"

You force him to do Tiktok dances with you, and he's surprisingly not that bad at them?!! 😭

Whenever one of you needs comfort, no words are needed. You just wrap each other in your arms, the hugs and comforting presence silencing the outside world for as long as you both want.

All in all, Ryan would be a loving, playful best friend who holds you and your friendship close to his heart. He'd do anything for you to see you happy, he would make fun of you ( he is the only one allowed to do that) but would defend you in that same breath if anyone messed with you. He is truly grateful for you, and even though you guys joke and make fun of each other all the time, he makes sure you know it every single day.

[remi00]

☕️Harvey Headcanons☕️

Note: I know that the “Too Sweet” Hozier thing is happening right now and I LOVE IT! As an OG Harvey romancer it’s great to add more people! Hozier has also been my #1 musician for a few years now so it’s all perfect!!!

__________________________

-Harvey has an irrational fear of Sebastian. This was spared when Sebastian came in for his annual checkup and Harvey realized just how much Seb rejects his body (smoking).

-Harvey takes his coffee as bitter as humanly possible only because he says sugar “makes his tongue burn.”

-Harvey (in my head) is 6’2” and 32 years old, and has those use tiny grey patches on the sides of his hair, which he will let you play with!

-Harvey absolutely HATES Pam because she walks in smelling like shit and looking even worse.

-I feel like Harvey smells like hand sanitizer and oak, maybe that’s just me tho?

-Harvey definitely isn’t muscular like someone like Alex, but he definitely isn’t dad bod material like Shane, so I like to think he is somewhere in the middle, with a lot of muscle and some chub!

-Harvey would definitely let you help trim his bread, since he really doesn’t want ANY stubble, he doesn’t like the texture.

-I feel like Harvey’s an only child, I don’t know why, maybe just me putting myself in his character a bit!

-Harvey is Pansexual. I was gonna stay straight, but no straight man grows his mustache like that until they’re balding.

-I think Harvey is also a bit autistic! He really likes planes and would definitely geek about them for hours to you!

-Dad Snores, enough said💀

-Harvey would treat you like a king/queen. To him, you are the most perfect thing that has ever walked this earth and he wakes up every day thankful you ACTUALLY chose him.

-Some nights, Harvey comes to you in tears, thinking about the patients he’s lost. He usually takes comfort from just sitting there and hugging, and kissing as he cries, since he knows if he talks he won’t stop crying.

-If you’re sad, he will so small things like gently massage your shoulders, draw tiny complicated shapes on your palm.

-Harvey would rather die then have you go into the Skull caverns, literally, he’s not joking when he says this.

-(if your a farmer with kids after marriage) Harvey would wake up early to take care of the baby, letting you sleep a bit longer.

-Harvey would kill for you, literally, he will never admit it, but he would.

-His love Language is Physical touch and acts of service!

-He’s actually a good cook, just worries he’ll suck so he lets you cook most of the time.

-You get free clinic visits!

-Harvey doesn’t get drunk easily, but if you do, he’ll for sure take care of you.

-Harvey, Shane, and Elliot go out every Saturday to just drink and catch up, and while there, he bombards Shane with health concerns.

_________________________

[arsenicalikat]

Thoughts on episode 3?

Jadis is kind of delusional. Did she really expect Rick to thank her for trapping him? And Rick pleading with Pearl to save Michonne for Okafor??? Is it manipulation, or is he serious? He was never really the manipulative one, so that is kind of startling.

The conversation with Jadis and Rick reminded me of Shane a little bit. Rick is at a point where he will do anything to protect what is his. Not that he isn't usually, but this time, it's tinged with helplessness. Rick was grasping at straws, and Jadis is... again delusional. At least she knows Michonne and Rick are a major threat.

Michonne can not for the life of her not be a badass. Throwing that head was such a bad decision. Like she could have let the soldiers take out the walkers, but she couldn't. She had to keep the others safe. It is who she is.

Also, Rick's name on the wall. He really made an impact and knows that if Michonne does the same, she will be in the same boat as him.

Pearl really cared about Okafor. I don't know why I find that surprising, but it did stun me. Her promotion was to be expected, and I don't think Rick will ever get it. And Michonne being on Beale's radar could be a huge fucking problem for everyone involved.

Rick really did clear a path for her. He went all the way so she could get out, meaning that he could too, but didn't. He made a choice. Then, so did she. He expected her to leave him behind, but that shit was never going to happen. He made the decision for her, and it would have gone a lot smoother if he had just spoken to Michonne.

I love how she threw Jadis and Negan's words in Jadis's face. It was pretty freaking hardcore. A hero with a shit haircut- sassy boy. Also, of course, she came back.

Rick pleading with Michonne broke my damn heart. He didn't tell her the danger they were in, and Michonne coming across the iPhone sketcher to give her hope was beautiful. Also, the etcher knew Michonne and Judith's names. Rick trusted that man.

Rick pulled his gun at the chance of Pearl attacking Michonne, which shows you where he stands, even if he spun it when speaking to Pearl. Pearl telling Rick and Michonne that all the brass will be in one place is a bad decision, even if she doesn't know it yet. I feel like Michonne is going to want to kill them all.

Again, kissing out in the open is such a bad fucking decision. And again Rick should have told her about Jadis and the danger of leaving.

Pearl pointing her gun a Michonee; she has lost her fucking mind if she thinks Rick wouldn't kill the entire team to prove a point.

I spoke too soon about the promotion... It's not a good thing.

Then he yelled at her like that and still did not explain anything. What the fuck, Rick?

Are you fucking shitting me? Fucking hell? That ending! Holy shit! She kidnapped her husband. She tossed herself and her husband out of a flying helicopter.

[kasperbunny]

i wrote this back in september, but i think im finally gonna post it here. lil thing for shane and my farmer elfie. a little bit angsty but fluffy in the end <3 (and if anyone wants a reference for how elfie looks here ya go)

this fic can also be found on ao3 as well.

Shane was crazy. He had to be. There was no possible way that any of this was even real to begin with. He was deluding himself, like he always did, trying to convince himself that anything good could ever happen to the likes of him. He was just stupid. He was always stupid. She didn’t, and couldn’t love him.

The sound of the glass bottle being sluggishly placed back on the table echoed against the walls of his untidy room. At least it was on the table, unlike so many of the beer cans and assorted alcohol bottles littering the floor of his room. He always said he would eventually pick them up, but he supposed he said that about everything in his life. I'll pick up those bottles tomorrow, I'll start to cut back on beer tomorrow, I'll finally fucking do something with my life tomorrow.

Shutting his eyes, he groaned and leaned his head back against the wall he was sitting against. His thoughts were still swirling in his head even after consuming more than half the bottle. He knew he shouldn't drink the whole thing, but how else would he get rid of these thoughts of insecurity, of self doubt, of…her? 

She was so beautiful. Not in a human way, her teeth too sharp and her eyes having that animalistic instinct to them. Her long, dark hair shimmered green in the bright sunlight as her small horns poked out of the top of her head. Shane couldn’t help but think she was ripped straight from his dreams. Maybe an acid induced dream, but a dream all the same. She always seemed so ethereal, yet dangerous. Like an otherworldly being with the power to turn him to ash with just a glance of those wild eyes.

And what was he? A human? A pathetic one at that. All he ever did was drink, work, drink, work, and drink again. Occasionally he would interrupt his schedule to head over to her little cabin on the farm so she could have her fun with him. Not that he wasn’t grateful for it, oh how grateful he was to even have a woman look at him, let alone allow him to pleasure her over and over, but is that all he was good for? Sex? He couldn’t even wrap his head around the idea. Why was she wasting her time with him, of all people? Shane was convinced she pitied him, that’s what it had to be. She could have anyone she wanted, multiple people if she so wished. She was so heavenly and enticing, why was she screwing the town drunk? Did she enjoy toying with him, luring him into a false sense of security and then crushing his already fragile heart?

“Fuck,” Shane’s head was spinning, not just from the alcohol, but from all the thoughts rushing back to him. He drank to get away from these feelings, not to accelerate them. Groaning under his breath, he struggled to steady himself against the wall so that he could stand up. Maybe I need some fresh air, he thought as he stumbled his way out of his bedroom. Anything beats rotting inside my room. 

Thankfully, Marnie and Jas were nowhere to be found as he made his way into the kitchen. He grimaced at the thought of Jas having to see him this way, and he hated to think of what Marnie would say about her good for nothing nephew being drunk again. Sighing, Shane managed to grab a can of cold beer from the fridge before making his way outside into the evening sun.

The crisp, cool autumn air was at least a small relief to his burning face. Alcohol always made him feel so warm, but never in a pleasant way. He always loved this time of year, when the leaves turned different shades of gold and burgundy and the hot, humid summer air finally subsided. Every year autumn hit the sleepy little countryside of Stardew Valley and every year Shane asked himself why he never went outside more and enjoyed the weather. Depression would do that to you, he supposed.

Somehow he managed to stumble his way to the edge of the forest, the large pond coming into his sight. The old dock creaked and wobbled under his feet as he made his way to the very end of it, plopping himself down so that his legs dangled off the edge. Cracking open the beer, he leaned himself back on his other hand, taking a sip and looking out at the clear, blue water in front of him. He always loved coming here when his head was clouded, somehow it put him at ease even if just for a little while. For a moment he closed his eyes as his head continued to spin with his intoxication, but it didn’t stop him from taking another large swig of the beer in his hand. At least his head was swirling because of the alcohol and not because of all the thoughts and doubts he had about his…relationship. If he could even call it that.

Shane thought that if he fell asleep right here on this dock, he wouldn’t mind it at all. In fact, he felt himself starting to doze off until his peace was interrupted by a terrifyingly familiar voice that immediately snapped him awake.

“Shane!” Elfie’s always excited voice came from behind him, causing him to straighten from his relaxed posture and tighten his grip on the can of beer in his hand. Shit, he thought, Of course she’s here. Another reason to hate living in such a small town. Can’t a drunk man spiral in peace?

He hadn’t even turned around at the sound of her, too scared to even face her right now. The silence from him didn’t deter her at all though as she plopped herself comfortably next to him at the edge of the dock, her legs so long that the ends of her dirty work boots dipped into the water below them and caused a ripple.

“Hey!” She was grinning that too sharp grin at him, her canines seeming to be even sharper than her other teeth. Usually the sight of them caused Shane’s stomach to flip in delight, but all he could think about at the moment was throwing himself into the pond and to never be seen again. Wishful thinking.

“H-Hey…” He finally muttered back at her, only half meeting her gaze before he looked out into the water again, making sure to chug the rest of his beer as he did. He was definitely going to need it.

“I didn’t see you today! You’re usually always at the bar so I went there looking for you,” She smelled like sweat, Shane noted, but somehow the smell of her perfume still lingered on her skin despite how much labor she put into that farm, “But you weren’t there, and Emily said she hadn’t seen you either, so I thought you’d be home,” If Shane had been looking at her he would have noticed how animated she was as she rambled, always using her hands to talk and map out exactly what she was feeling. Not to mention how her tail swayed absentmindedly, another reminder that she was so wholeheartedly not human, and that Shane was way in over his head. 

“So here I am! And I found you!” She was beaming at him, her feet swaying as they hung off the edge of the rickety dock. Shane had only half been listening to her, mostly because of the alcohol fogging his brain, but partly because he just didn’t know what to say to her. He felt petrified, starting to sweat as all his racing thoughts came back to him full force.

What did he want to say? What could he say? Would she even care how he was feeling? They weren’t dating, after all. At least he didn’t think so. Why would she put any thought into how her latest fling felt? Is that what he was to her, a fling? That had to be it, that’s all he was to her. Just a fun little toy to play with until she inevitably got bored of him and realized what he really was. The town bum, a drunk, a depressed, lazy sack of shit that was only good for pitying. She didn’t return his feelings. He would never be enough for her to be considered anything more than a fleeting thought. He would never be good enough for anyone. Never, never, never, never, never…

“Shane?” 

He realized he had taken too long to reply as his thoughts suffocated and consumed him. He squeezed his eyes shut for a moment, exhaling loudly as he tried to compose himself, apparently forgetting to breathe in his haste. 

“Are you okay?”

He swallowed thickly, allowing himself a glance over at her despite knowing it would be a mistake. She was looking right at him with those beautiful, big brown eyes that shone golden as they reflected the setting sun. Concern traced her features as her thick brows furrowed slightly, causing Shane to look away quickly in shame. He couldn’t handle her looking at him like that. Like she actually cared.

“I…Yeah. I’m fine, just…” He couldn’t breathe, he felt like his chest was going to explode as his heart raced. His hands were sweating, “Can I ask you a question, Elfie?” 

Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, why was he so stupid? 

“Oh, yeah! Anything,” She didn’t seem to be picking up on his absolutely earth shattering anxiety, simply smiling softly at him and giving him all her attention.

Shane's mouth suddenly felt like sandpaper, his tongue too heavy in his mouth and his throat feeling like it was going to close up. His heart was beating so fast he could feel it thump-thump-thump in his ears, making his head pound. He should have brought more beer.

"Do you even care about me? Like, really care about me?" His voice broke slightly, tears stinging at his eyes but he refused to let them fall. He hesitated to say the word love instead, not being able to take the heartbreak if she said no.

"We sleep together, don't we?" She cocked her head slightly to the side, her eyebrows scrunching a little as she attempted to understand Shane's question.

"What? Yeah, but…" He avoided her gaze, his grip on the can of beer in his hand tightening so that it had started to dent. "That's not what I mean, and you know it."

"I don't know it," Her tail was twitching curiously as she watched him, trying to understand what he meant. He seemed upset, angry…but why? Didn't she show that she cared about him? They hung out all the time, they kissed, they were intimate. Isn’t that how humans were supposed to act when they cared about each other? Hadn’t she been doing that for months now? She knew he had been drinking, and she only hoped this was a spout of drunken stupor. Elfie wished that humans would just say what they really meant, instead of making her guess.

"You…" he huffed a frustrated sigh, his patience being strung even thinner than it usually was,"You do know. I know you do," He couldn't stop his hands from shaking, "I just want you to treat me like a real human being. I'm not just some toy for you to play with. I'm real, Elfie!"

She was quiet for a moment, only staring at him as his words washed over her. 

"But I'm…not a human being," Her words were laced with confusion. She didn't understand, but a pang of guilt shot through her chest nonetheless. She finally looked away from him, trying to find an answer as she glanced down into the rippling blue water below them, "I'm sorry, Shane. Is that what you want? A human?"

"Fuck," all the effort of holding back his tears was in vain, as they finally started to burst from his eyes and roll over his reddened cheeks. They felt hot on his face, the anger and sadness bubbling up inside of him and boiling over in the form of tears. 

"You don't understand," he didn't think he had ever felt so disgusting. Sure, he had endured countless nights of sobbing and drinking himself to sleep, but never had he felt so pathetic, so hopeless, so useless. He couldn't even look at her, he was too embarrassed. Here he was, a thirty year old man, crying his eyes out in front of the woman of his dreams. If she didn't already pity him and find him pathetic, she would now, seeing him in this state. 

Not being able to form words, Shane buried his face in the sleeves of his hoodie. He wished he could just disappear, or at least pretend that they had never met. Maybe his life would still suck, but at least he wouldn't have to torment himself over her.

She didn't know if she should touch him, but she did anyway, gently placing a hand on his back and rubbing in careful, soothing motions. Elfie realized that she had never seen Shane cry in the months that she had known him. He was always so calm, if not standoffish, never emotional like this. Then again, somehow she had never been around him when he was drunk either. She wanted to kiss his tears away.

Shane flinched away at her touch, "Don't pity me! Please, please don't fucking pity me," he pushed her away, attempting to push himself up to stand despite how liquid his whole body felt. Somehow he managed without slipping off of the dock, "I'm sorry. I just…I need to go. I'm sorry," He was still crying as he turned from her, his whole body shaking and feeling like it would fall apart at any second.

"Shane!" Elfie was quick to stand and follow him, not that it was very hard to catch up to a drunk man. She had reached out to grab him by the arm before realizing it would be a bad idea, so she kept it to herself, "Shane, please. You're right, I don't understand. Please tell me." 

Maybe it was the alcohol, maybe the depression, maybe the months of never knowing if his feelings were reciprocated and never knowing where he stood with her. Probably a mix of everything as Shane couldn't stop himself from shaking and his tears just kept coming. Thick streams of liquid poured down his cheeks and dripped onto his already stained hoodie. He was so sad, so angry. Angry at himself, at her, at the universe. They had such a good thing going for all these months, why did he have to overthink things and make a mess out of himself like he always did?

He was still standing away from her, not daring to look into her eyes out of fear of completely breaking down. His chest felt so painfully tight, like it would just combust if he breathed the wrong way. His own arms came up to cradle himself in a last ditch effort to provide any kind of comfort to his aching body. He wished so badly that they were her arms instead. 

"I…" He took a shuddering breath as he tried to calm himself enough to talk. His voice was shaking, "What are we, Elfie? Why do you waste your time with me?" He hiccupped out another soft sob, "I'm nothing. I'm fucking nothing to you. You're so beautiful…" Shane felt fresh, hot tears wet his face once more. God, he was so drunk right now. He felt like he was going to pass out, "If you don’t want something serious, or you just want sex, then fine, but just tell me now so I can get over you."

Elfie had never fought the urge to hug anyone so hard before. Not out of pity like Shane was so convinced of, but out of genuine care. Even if their relationship was a mystery, they were at least friends and Elfie wanted more than anything to take care of her friend right now. Even if she was the reason he was in pain in the first place.

She cautiously took a few steps towards him, her voice soft and laden with concern, "I do care about you, Shane," She tried to choose her words carefully, knowing he wasn’t in a right state of mind, "I thought…I thought I was showing you that," her hands twisted anxiously behind her back. She was never very good at communicating her emotions, much preferring them to shine through her actions, "I liked you, so…When you came over that night…and we kissed…I thought…" she trailed off slightly, hoping she was making sense, "I thought this was how it was supposed to work. I'm sorry. Did I hurt you?" She was fighting back her own tears now, her eyes blinking rapidly to try and ward them off. 

She had never intended to hurt him, she would never want to. She was inexperienced, still young for her species, and still trying to figure out what it was that she even wanted. When she had moved into that dilapidated farm and met the townspeople, met Shane, she was happy. She thought she made him happy too.

Shane felt his anger start to bubble again, quickly coming to a boil and spilling over the top, "Did you hurt me? Of course you hurt me! Why else would I be here crying my eyes out and looking like a fucking idiot!" He didn't mean to raise his voice at her, he didn't mean to, but he couldn't contain his emotions as easily as he could when he was sober. He couldn't even think straight, his head now pounding and his entire body shaking against his will. Why was he so worked up? Why was he even hopeful in the first place that maybe, just maybe, something good would actually happen in his miserable life?

"Do you want me to leave?" She didn't fight the tears starting to shimmer in her eyes. Her voice was unusually quiet and small. She didn't know what else to say. What could she say? She liked Shane, she liked all the humans around this small town, she never wanted to cause any harm or hurt anyone. Was she just stupid? Sometimes she felt that way, not picking up on their emotions and not knowing what the right thing to say was. She cared so much, yet never knew if she was doing enough.

Finally turning around to face her at the question, all of Shane's anger melted away and instead was replaced with a sting of guilt shooting right through his already aching chest. She looked so sad, so pleading. Like she was genuinely remorseful, like she genuinely didn't understand what she was doing. Shane had seen her cry before, but only over such small things. Like the time she had caught a frog outside in the rain, and she had hurried inside to show him. She acted like he hadn't seen a frog before, but she was so excited to open up her cupped hands and exclaim about it to him. She had been crying then (Shane! Look how small it is!), but out of pure joy. Now…she stood there, sniffling with tears rolling down her cheeks. Shane noted how she was still so, so beautiful even in her sadness.

"Elfie I…" He ran an anxious hand through his already messy hair, cautiously taking a step toward her. He was staring at the ground, the sight of her crying because of him was too much to bear, "I'm sorry. I'm drunk, I can't…" He squeezed his stinging eyes shut, wanting nothing more than to just lay down. He needed the biggest nap of his life right now, "I can't…Think. I'm sorry."

She could see him now, as he faced her. His handsome face now stained with tears and his eyes puffy. Had she done this to him? Had he been hurting this bad for so long, and she hadn't even known?

"Can I please hug you, Shane?" 

She didn't get a verbal response, Shane simply closing the space between them in a heartbeat. As quickly as she had asked, he was already there, his face pressed against her chest and his shaking arms wrapping themselves around her waist in an embrace. She returned it, holding him tight against her and leaning down a little to nuzzle her face in his dark hair.

He felt so safe in her arms. All of his sadness, his tiredness, his anger, melting away at her embrace. She was so warm and soft and wonderful, like nothing bad could ever happen to him as long as he was wrapped tight in her arms. 

"It's okay. I have you," Her words came out in a sweet whisper, one of her hands trailing up his back and up into his hair to stroke at it softly. He shivered at her touch, starting to cry again. How could she be so sweet, after he had just yelled at her for doing nothing wrong? He had made her cry, and yet here she was, comforting and cradling him like he even deserved an ounce of her kindness. Sometimes she seemed like Shane’s only saving grace. An angel fallen to Earth, bestowing upon him her unconditional compassion.

"Please don't leave. I don't want you to leave me. I love…" Don't say it, don't say it, don't say it you drunk fucking idiot, "I love…being around you," Shane hiccupped softly against her, whining as he struggled to form words. He had never felt more pathetic, but somehow he was at ease as she held him. Maybe he was just too tired at this point to care.

She shushed him, sensing how much he was struggling with his words. If she hadn't been holding him, he probably would have collapsed to the ground in front of her.

"We…we're so different. How are we going to make this work?" Shane sobbed, his fingers digging into the small of her back, "Do you want to make this work…?" His voice cracked, his tone pleading with her. Please, please don't leave me after this, he rattled off in his head, I'm sorry.

She didn't feel like she could answer at the moment, not even knowing how she felt. She liked him, she knew that, but he was right. They were so different, they were different species, sometimes they didn't even understand each other. But she wanted to try, if only to make up for how she had made him feel.

Elfie placed a soft kiss to his forehead, keeping her lips there as she spoke, "You need to lay down…do you want me to take you to the farm?" Her voice was even lower than a whisper, as if her sweet, soft words were a secret for Shane's ears only.

"Y-Yeah. Yeah," He let out a shaky sigh, "Thank you…" He wished he could stop crying, but her never ending kindness just overwhelmed him over and over again. She was such a good person, even if she didn't always understand the people around her. Shane envied her for that.

"Okay. Take my hand, come on," With that, they finally untangled from each other and interlocked their fingers as she led him up the path to her humble cabin. Shane tried his best not to stumble, but it was so difficult when his legs felt like they were made of jelly. It didn't help that his heart was still beating out of his chest as they held hands the whole way. He was sure they had held hands before, but this time felt…different. It felt so genuine, and he never wanted to let go.

Finally making it, Shane attempted to stumble up the three little steps before reaching her door. Elfie kept a hand against his back the whole time, stabilizing him and making sure he didn't fall. He practically collapsed into her bed, the familiar softness bringing him comfort as he finally felt his body relax. He couldn't stop a heavy sigh as he rolled onto his back and closed his eyes, the exhale making his chest feel less tight.

A sudden dip in the spot next to him caused him to lazily open his eyes back up, only half lidded now. She had sat next to him, her hand back in his disheveled hair and her nails lightly scratching at his scalp. It felt so heavenly, her hands always did. He made a small noise of approval as he looked up at her. She smiled as they made eye contact, her thumb stroking across his forehead in a loving gesture.

"I'm…" He let out another shuddering breath, trying to still his shaking body, "I'm sorry that you had to see me like this. I…" he squeezed his eyes shut so he could focus on talking, "I tried for so long to not drink in front of you…I don't want you to be scared…" 

"Shh. It's okay, Shane," She cooed at him, "I'm not scared. I could never be scared of you," She flashed her teeth as she chuckled, "You just need to rest, okay?" Suddenly she was getting up from the bed, much to Shane's disappointment, but quickly surprised him again as she walked to the end of the bed and started to untie the laces on his sneakers. 

"Let me get these off for you so you can sleep, okay?" Shane stared at her as she removed his shoes, then quickly removed her own boots and dropped them to the floor with a heavy thud. His heart was beating fast again.

"Why…Why are you being so nice to me, Elfie?" He was looking up at her again as she seated herself next to him once more. The gesture was still replaying in his head. He couldn't remember ever being taken care of like this, "I yelled at you…I…" I'm not worthy, he thought, "I'm an asshole."

Her smile was always so cute, so charmingly sweet, like she had never been mad at anyone in her life.

"Sometimes…" She teased. She remembered when they first met and he had been so rude as she introduced herself. It never deterred her, only making her more ambitious to befriend him. Maybe that did make her stupid, but she guessed it had all worked out in the end, "But…we're friends, right? And…friends take care of each other. So that's what I'm doing. Now, move over."

Struggling to move over, Shane gave her ample room to slide in next to him. They were facing each other now, able to look into each other's eyes with how close they were.

"Is this okay?" Elfie brought a hand up to cup Shane's tear stained face, rubbing a thumb gently over his cheek, then across his lips, "Can I kiss you?"

A smile finally cracked its way onto Shane's face, quickly twitching into a full on laugh at her question. A sleeve of his hoodie coming up to hide his face, trying not to offend her.

"What?" Her pointed ears twitched, her smile fading from her face as she looked at him confused, "Why are you laughing?" Did I say something wrong? 

"I'm sorry, I just…You don’t need permission to kiss me," He hadn't meant to laugh at her, but the question was just so absurd to him, considering how physical their relationship had been up to that point. He welcomed the laugh though, at least he wasn't feeling completely miserable now, “Elfie, we’ve…done a lot worse than that.”

"Well…!" She slapped him playfully on the shoulder, a toothy grin spreading across her face, "You…You said you wanted me to treat you real, so…I was thinking about your feelings!" She was mirroring his laughing now too, "So is that a yes…? I really want to kiss you."

"Y-Yeah. Please…" he gave a short huff through his nose as his laughing died down and her lips connected with his. He eagerly welcomed it, his eyes closing again as he leaned into her touch. Wrapping an arm around her waist, he pulled her in against him so that their bodies were flush with each other. He never wanted to let her go.

"Mm…" She sighed happily, smiling against the familiar feel of his lips against her own. She was purring, the noise startling Shane a little before he realized what it was. He didn't think he would ever get used to the fact that she could even do that. 

She was the one to finally pull away, still stroking her thumb against his cheek as she spoke, "Do you want to…talk? Um, about us, I guess. That's what you wanted, right?" She was trying to choose her words carefully as they looked at each other, anxiety now making a home in her own chest. She wasn't good with serious conversations. She had no idea where to even start.

Shane dipped his fingers underneath her shirt, just to touch her hip, just to feel her warm skin underneath his touch, "Yeah, I want to. I just…" His head was still spinning, but he seemed much more relaxed than before, "I'm drunk, babe. I can't…I can't right now. Tomorrow…" His voice was soft, sleepy, as his eyes fluttered shut once more. It felt impossible to open them again, his exhaustion overtaking him as he leaned into her.

She was still purring quietly, looking down at his tired face, wanting nothing more than to give him anything he needed.

"Okay. It's a promise," She was whispering again, causing Shane to shiver, "Get some rest, Shane. I'll be right here."

"Thank you…for taking care of me…" He managed to mutter out before dozing off, pressing his face in against her chest as he used it like a pillow. She giggled at that, returning a hand to his hair and petting him as he slumbered.

She hadn't meant to fall asleep, only meaning to ease him to sleep and then get up and do a few chores that she hadn't gotten to that day, but it couldn't be helped. It was already dark outside, and she had such a warm and soft man right next to her, holding onto her so sweetly as he snored quietly. She felt her eyes flutter shut, not even fighting to keep them open as she joined him in his sweet dreams. 

[sinsandsweetness]

Attitude (sex and zombies- chapter 11)

pairing- {Shane x fem!reader}

summary-You and Shane have something in common.

warnings- 18+ content, MDNI!

notes- flashback/ bonus scene for a Shane request. lets say set in between chapter 1 and 2.

“What the hell is he doin' over there? Gearing up for world war three? Jeesus.”

You were successful in holding in your laugh. Though a tiny smirk escaped that Shane unfortunately happened to see. 

You were standing with him and Rick at the picnic table. Gearing up for the days search party for Sophia. Switching the route up and sending people out in pairs. You’d hoped for Rick as your search companion but Dale was weirdly insistent on being his partner. And so you got stuck with Shane. 'Stuck' might be a harsh word. You got to pair up with Shane. 

“He’s just well prepared I guess.” You shrugged. Also watching the hunter from across camp, geared up with an incredible amount of leather on. Fixing up arrows and cleaning several of his guns. The tying of his shoelaces around his pant leg was what sent Shane over the edge. Prompting the rude jokes about his overpreparation and dedication to the cause. 

“It’s smart! No mice can get up in there.” You tried to defended the man, though still chuckling at Shane’s jokes even at the expense of Daryl. 

“Yeah well he’s still an idiot.”

“He’s just trying to help, Shane.” “You don’t need to be such an asshole,” You and Rick both spoke at the same time. He looked over and gave you a sweet smile at your silent agreement. Both sticking up for the man you were beginning to befriend. Shane huffed a quick ‘whatever’ and continued cleaning his gun. 

You let Rick run over the game plan once again. Paying extra close attention to the veins in his hand and the way his long fingers pointed at the map, and definitely not enough to the words he was actually saying. 

“You ready?” Shane tapped your hip with the back of his hand, grabbing your attention away from the dirty thoughts about what Ricks fingers could be doing to you. 

“Yup. Gun. Knife. Phone. Wallet. “ You joked, patting down your pockets. Your face dropped at his lack of reaction, “Just kidding...” 

He rolled his eyes and let himself smirk at your awful attempt to humour him. “I’ll meet you in the truck,” and lightly smacked your bum. Sending you off towards the driveway. 

You watched him and Rick talk from the window of the vehicle. Lot's of eye rolling from Shane, and a clear argument between the two. His head still shaking as he entered the drivers seat. 

“What?” You asked. The obvious shift in his attitude from before. He shifted the truck into drive and peeled out of the driveway. 

“Is everything ok?” You asked after a moment of his heated silence. 

He looked over while driving, contemplating what to tell you. 

“Rick. He just- I don’t think he gets it. I mean come on, you 'n me both know we ain’t ever finding this girl.”

“Not with that attitude,” You joked.

He glared again. Serious written all over his face. You straightened up. 

“Wait you actually want us to leave? To give up?” You looked at him. Honestly shocked at his forwardness. “Would you do that if it were Carl? Or Lori? Or me?”

“I wouldn’t have let any of you run off in the first place. Rick's too focused on the what if's. What he needs to focus on is the reality. She’s dead. Gotta be. There’s only so much ground to cover here. Hell we coulda been in Fort Benning by now."

“Rick is doing everything he can. He's trying to find a little girl who is scared and alone, surrounded by crazy flesh eating monsters. And you want us to leave? To Fort Benning? You really think that’s gonna be any better than here?”

“Yeah. I do.” 

You scoffed a little. Rolling your eyes and turning to watch out the window. 

The rest of the ride was quiet. You parked and walked the section that Rick had you two searching. 

While you trekked through the forest, Shane began shit talking again. He started by complaining about Daryl, then Dale, then going back to Rick. Which normally you’d love to listen to since it involved Ricks name. But with the condescending tone Shane was speaking with, you were just irritated. 

“-n everyone always has to listen to Rick. Take sides with Rick. Doesn't help that you and that redneck won’t hop off his dick-"

You whipped around quickly. Getting fed up at his bitching.

“Ohmygod Shane. What is your deal? Are you jealous or something? Is that what this is all about?”

“Jealous?” He scoffed. “I need him to get his head out of his ass, and start being a real leader. Focus on his family-” 

“All he does is focus on his family!! You’re just mad that he’s doing a better job leading than any of us could.” You looked up at him. Not shying away from the scowl burning into you. “Or does this have to do with the fact that you're obsessing over his wife.” 

He pulled at your collar, tugging you real close. 

“I am not obsessing over anyone,” He hissed, nose almost touching yours. 

“Well you’re not being very subtle about wanting to fuck her then.” No emotion could be read from your voice. 

He thought for a moment. 

“And you’re not very subtle about wanting to fuck Rick either.”

What an ass. 

“Looks like we got something in common then.”

You tugged yourself out of his grasp and turned around, returning your focus to your search. Checking the ground for prints and hair and clothes. Anything that could have signalled Sophia’s presence in the woods. Looking for everything that Daryl had tried teaching you about. 

“Hey! Get back here. We ain’t done yet.”

“Shane, I'm trying to find Sophia can we please just focus on-“ you were interrupted by his hand turning you by the shoulder and abruptly crashing his mouth against yours. What the fuck is he thinking. 

“Agh- Shane!” You pulled away. Confused and surprised.  

“Aw come on baby. You just said it. We have something in common. You’re pining over him... I ain’t getting over her. Let's take this out on eachother.” 

“Shane I told you I-"

“Don’t even try and tell me that you're saving yourself for someone else cause I know that’s bullshit. He's married. And loyal. Now take your jeans off.”

You could feel your cheeks turn red. Getting turned on by the way he ordered you around. And the way he wouldn’t take no for an answer. 

“We’re in the middle of the woods-" you kept your voice low, trying to pull away but he shushed you, moving in on your frame and pushing you against a tree. 

“You afraid Rick's gonna see us? Huh?” Shane started kissing down your neck as his hands fumbled with the button of your jeans. Tugging the fabric down your ass cheeks. 

You couldn’t think of an answer. Yes. Kind of. Definitely. fuck. 

Not only did you not want Rick seeing, but you really didn’t want Daryl seeing. He might actually fight you if he found out.

“Just like last time baby, just relax,”

He palmed at your breasts, and you could feel the wetness pooling in your lace underwear. 

“That was supposed to be a one time thing Shane-"

He shut you up with his tongue in your mouth. You groaned, feeling him hum against your mouth. There wasn’t much you could do except give in to his grabby hands, pulling at your jeans and moving on to your flannel. Not caring about the search and rescue mission anymore. Just the possibility of getting bent over a tree stump and fucked into oblivion. 

You were no better then any man. 

You kissed him back as your hands went to his chest, pulling on his t-shirt, fingernails digging into his skin. You could hear him undo his belt.

“Fuck,” You whispered as his head dipped back to your neck, kissing down to your shoulder. You kicked your pants off to the ground beside you. Flannel unbuttoned and hanging open with his reach going for your panties, tugging them to the side. 

“Up,” he tapped twice on the backs of your thighs. So you threw your arms around him and held on as he lifted you up. Pulled your legs around his waist and pushed you up against the tree. 

“Atta girl.” He moved his mouth back over yours. Kissing you rough and messy as he lined himself up with your slit, the head of his cock running through your slick a couple of times before he pushed all the way in. 

You let out a groan. From the stretch of practically zero foreplay, but mostly just the pleasure of being filled right up. 

“Fuck baby. So wet and ready for me.” He said against your lips. You only moaned in response.

He fucked you into the tree, your back scratching against the bark and his hands holding tightly at the skin on your thighs. He wouldn't stop talking, spitting continuous praise, and occasional mocking.

“So fuckin' tight for me,”

“You like that? Getting fucked out here for anyone to see?”

“Damn baby you always this loud?”

“Bet I'm takin' care of you better than Rick ever could. Don’t you agree sweet stuff?" 

He kept on going until you were an incoherent, moaning mess. 

“Shane!” You could feel yourself getting close, digging your fingers into his biceps. 

“Yeah princess? You close for me?”

“So close-” 

He lifted you up a little further, bringing your legs up and over his shoulders. Unsure of how he was even holding you up at that point. But the new angle made you cry out. Hitting a spot so deep inside of you that it borderline hurt. The sounds you made were unavoidable, not that he minded. If anything it just boosted his ego and made him try even harder.

"That's right, come all over my cock baby. Fuck. Such a good girl for me." He fucked you through your orgasm. Hard and fast and destroying your cervix. Eyes rolling back with his name on your tongue. 

As soon as your breathing shallowed, he lowered you back down to the ground. 

“On your knees,”

You happily complied. Getting down and taking him in your mouth, hands pumping at the base as you finished him off. Didn’t take long before you were swallowing every drop. 

You looked up at him with swollen lips and half lidded eyes. 

“Goddamn. You really are something else.”

He did up his own belt as you adjusted your thong, and buttoned up your shirt. 

Shane helped you up and started to pull your jeans on. Being sure to cop a feel of your ass as he did. You chuckled at his predictability.

“Hey,” he grabbed your jaw tipping it up. “Feel a little better now? Get some of that attitude fucked out of you?”

"Did you?"

His eyes darkened. "Do we gotta go another round or are you gonna smarten up?" He joked. Mostly anyway.

“You’re still an asshole.” You shook your head and tried not to smile.

He laughed and grabbed your ass again, pulling you in for one last kiss. 

“We should get going. Get the rest of this region checked.” 

You nodded and grabbed your weapons off the ground, following closely behind him. 

-------------------------

"Nothing?" Daryl jogged up the driveway as you hopped out of the truck. You shook your head.

"You?"

He shook his head too. Disappointment flooding his face. "Fuck."

"We'll go again tomorrow. We did all we could for the day." You let him grab at your shirt, pulling you towards the camp. Only looking back at Shane for a second, to see him smirking at you from the truck. What a shit head.

"Rick was asking for you." Daryl said as he kicked a rock down the gravel.

"Really?!"

"You don't have to sound so excited about it." he grumbled.

"Shut up."

"Seriously. I'm just glad you weren't paired up with him today."

"Why?"

He almost laughed in response until he realized you were serious.

"Cause you're way too fuckin' easy. Woulda made a cheater out of the poor guy the second you got him alone." 

"I would not!" You shoved his arm gently. Couldn't help but feel a little hurt at him calling you easy. Mostly because you knew it was right. And while Daryl may have been relieved about you not being paired up with Rick, he probably didn't realize he should've been worrying about Shane.

If he knew how truly easy you'd been in the woods, he'd have you over his knees for sure.

[hannahssimblr]

As the sun sets and the waves glitter in the pink light we four sit on the crest of the dunes, obsessed by our attempts to open the crown seals of our beer bottles with Shane’s keys. It's been twenty minutes and nothing has happened, we just watch him, bored, as he fumbles it over and over again.

“There’s a knack to it,” he keeps saying, “You'll see,” and then makes a big show of trying to prove himself as the key lamely flicks off the glass neck and barely dents the cap. 

“We can try using a shoe,” Joe suggests. “I did it before at a party, like. You’re meant to put the bottle inside it and then thump it on a wall and then the cap just, like, comes right off somehow.”

“How would that work?” Jen tuts, “The cap is bent onto the thing, you’re not going to knock it off by ramming it into a wall, are you? Think about the science of it.”

“We also don’t have a wall,” I point out and flick the little aluminium cap with my nail. I think about the consequences of opening it with my teeth and wonder what kind of fit my dad would have if I chipped a tooth, pierced my ears and shaved my head all in one day.

Joe shrugs, “I’m just throwing out suggestions here, lads. And if you’ve no better ideas then-”

“I’ve almost got it,” Shane grunts just as the key flies out of his hand and lands somewhere in the sand beside us.

“Ugh! Joe,” Jen cries with resignation, “Just go up to the surf shack and ask Anthony for a bottle opener. Let’s admit defeat here. You can tell him it’s for lemonade or some shit, I don’t care.”

I cringe, “Oh God, don’t send him up there, if Anthony knows we’re hanging around up here then…”

“Then what?”

“Like, do you think he’ll send Liam up to hang out with us again?”

Jen hesitates, “Well, maybe he won’t. Maybe he’ll be too busy to come this time.”

I groan, “When is Liam ever busy in the evening though?”

“Well I feel sorry for him.”

Joe scoffs, “For Liam? Do you guys remember that time that we told him we’d rolled him a special joint but it was actually just bits of grass and herbs from Jude’s kitchen? And he thought he was high and started rolling around on the carpet and everything?”

I smirk and Jen thumps my arm hard because I’m the only boy she can reach. “Youse are all mean,” she says, even though she wasn’t there so she doesn’t actually know how funny it was. “Liam is nice, he’s just trying to make friends.”

Joe laughs, “Here I’ll go up to the surf shack and tell him we’re playing truth or dare again. Dare him to talk about something that’s not surfing or that time his da brought him to Australia, for once.”

“Piss off Joe, just go get the bottle opener. I don’t care if Liam comes over. You can all challenge yourselves and be nice to him for once, you dickheads.”

When he leaves I prod her knee, “Since when are you so nice, hm?”

“I’ve always been nice, I don't know what you’re on about.”

“Yeah Jen,” I roll my eyes, “You’re an angel.”

A bottle cap suddenly flies down the dune between us, followed by a satisfying pop. “Got it,” sighs Shane. “Finally.”

A short time later Joe comes back with the bottle opener, but is perplexed to find us already drinking. 

“Shane got the key thing to work,” I explain. “But thanks for going anyway.”

“Aw what? I had to talk to Anthony for ages when I was there. He asked me about school and everything.”

“Oh no,” Shane hands him an open bottle as he plonks onto the sand, “and Liam?”

“Dunno, wasn’t there. Didn’t see him anyway.”

“Good,” I mutter, and Jen elbows me sharply in the ribs and hisses, “Well he would have been welcome if he was there, right Judie?”

“Right.”

“Wait I forgot something,” Joe digs around in his hoodie pocket and pulls out a little bag, “I ran into my brother on the way to the shack, he was coming back from work. Gave me this,” he flicks it and dangles it in front of us as though it’s something more exciting than the three euros worth of the worst quality hash that money can buy. 

“Giz that,” Shane snatches it out of his hand and peers at it closely, “Man that’s basically just weed dust.”

“Enough to feel something off it though.”

“Hardly.”

“Well either you want some or you don’t.”

Shane flicks the dregs of his beer onto the sand and then launches the glass bottle into the marram grass, “Yeah, fine so.”

Joe glances at Jen, “You in?”

“Yep.”

“Jude?”

I hesitate, “Nah, man, I’ll just stick with the beer for now, thanks.”

Shane laughs, “Jude gets sick off weed.”

“Seriously?”

I cringe, “Not all the time.”

Jen is laughing then, “Jude gets sick off everything. Once we were inhaling permanent marker fumes in first year and he went and got sick out the changing room window, and there was that time that he had a shot of tequila-”

Bile rises immediately in my throat at the memory, “Yeah, thanks, I don’t want to think about it.”

She cackles, “Oh come on, and that time in the playground when we-” I dive toward her to push her into the sand and start poking her ribs where I know she’s ticklish so that she has to stop talking about it. 

“Stop!” She shrieks, “God, stop!”

“Are you gonna shut up? Huh?”

“Yes, yes I swear!” and as she lies there gasping for air I fidget with the laces of my shoes and the frayed thread of my shorts with jerky, trembling fingers. I don’t want anyone to know about the things we used to do in the playground. They wouldn’t find it as funny as Jen does. Or, in a worst case scenario they might be intrigued and want to know more about all of the things that I hate talking about the most. 

“Do you get sick off beer too, man?” Joe says, “‘Cause my brother says that Americans can’t hold their beer at all. That they get drunk off nothing. Is that you?”

“Your brother? What does he know? Didn’t he get his head stuck between the railings on Wexford bridge and have to be cut out by the fire brigade?”

“Twice, yeah,” Joe laments, “He’s got big ears, like.”

“I heard he got his head stuck in the window bars of the boys school in town too,” Shane pipes up, and Jen starting giggling into her collar until she can’t hold back anymore and collapses in a fit of raucous laughter, and then Shane does, and I do too, while Joe protests and tries to explain to us that his brother was just doing it to be funny, and how there’s actually nothing wrong with him despite what we may think. Tears blur my eyes with laughter , and every time I think I can stop I’ll catch eyes with Jen or see Shane’s red face and I’ll laugh all over again, and so Joe huffs and plonks onto the ground with us and starts to roll a clumsy joint in silence. 

“Hey guys, what’s so funny?”

A familiar voice causes Shane to jump to rigid attention and bring a self conscious hand to smooth down his cowlick, and it’s from looking at him that I know that Clóda is here. Everyone springs to attention whenever she shows up.

She stands at the bottom of the dune like some kind of vision with her straight blonde hair swishing around to her mid back and slim legs extending out from the shortest denim shorts that I’ve ever seen on a girl, and yet they don’t look tacky on her. Nothing looks tacky on Clóda, and I’m so busy looking at Clóda in her non-tacky shorts that I don’t even notice her friend until she introduces her. 

“This is my friend from school, Rachel,” She says. Rachel has blue makeup on her eyes. That’s all I notice, because my eyes have slid back to Clóda again and the way her mouth moves when she says, “We were just going for a walk. Are you guys up to much?”

“Smoking a joint if you want some,” says Joe.

She pulls a face, but Shane jumps in quickly, “We’re not actually, he got some shit hash from somewhere but none of us want it. Here, we’re just having a few beers and talking and stuff if you want to hang out.”

And Joe throws his hands up incredulously and mutters to himself as he stuffs his wonky, unlit joint back into his pocket in defeat and disappointment that nobody wants to get semi stoned on the accumulated remnants of the dust from his brother’s friend’s weed grinder tonight.

But it’s okay for everyone else, because Clóda and Rachel do want to hang out, and they scale the dunes to sit with us, and luckily by now Shane has perfected the art of popping bottle caps off with his house keys so that he can impress them both and be equally impressed with himself. I consider starting a bet with Jen to guess how long it will take for him to slip the fact that he plays centre field on his local football team into the conversation but decide against it in case she accuses me of being mean and the girls hear her.

“Nice earrings,” Rachel sits down to my left, and I know that she probably intends it as some sort of insult, maybe even a flirtatious insult but I don’t really care about what Rachel, Clóda’s friend from school, thinks about my earrings. 

“Thanks,” I say, “they’re from Claire’s Accessories,” which makes her laugh, and she scoots in closer to me, “What’s your name?”

“Jude.”

“There’s a girl in my school called Jude.”

“Right, well I guess you’ve found two of the girliest things about me in the first minute of meeting me.”

She laughs again even though it wasn’t that funny, and Jen, to my right, laughs privately to herself too. “Hehe,” She imitates in a high pitched voice as Rachel turns to take a beer from Shane. “She fancies you.”

“I don’t care.”

There’s a gust of cool air on my head as my cap is whipped from me, “I like your hat,” Clóda says. She puts it on and leans down to rub her hand over the surface of my shorn head, “But I don’t like your new hair. When did you shave it off?”

I peer at her and smile. I don’t care about Rachel, but Clóda? Clóda does wild things to my insides. “Are you saying you liked my old hair?”

A shrug, “Yeah it was alright. I just preferred it.”

“I might have left it how it was if I’d known that.”

She blushes and giggles, and Shane looks at me, and as I look back at him a muscle twitches in his cheek. I shrug. What are you gonna do? I can’t help it if the girls I like usually seem to like me back. I’m lucky like that. 

Rachel grabs the hat to distract her and puts it on backwards, and she pulls a stupid face and then they giggle and wrestle each other for it while Shane and Joe watch them with fascination. 

“Oh, okay, they both fancy you,” Jen hisses, “surprise surprise.”

“Are you jealous?”

She rolls her eyes, “Please, I’ve lost all hope of finding one single lesbian in this whole town. I’m the only gay for ten miles. I’ll just die alone this summer as I predicted.”

I jut out my bottom lip, “poor Jen.”

“Yeah, piss off.” 

Rachel whoops abruptly and loudly near my ear and snatches my beer bottle from the hollow I made for it in the sand. “I’ve your beer now,” she points out, and dangles it in front of my nose. “I’ve your hat and your beer,” 

“I can see that.”

Jen hisses at me, “she just wants you to flirt back. Just go wrestle her for the stupid beer. Don’t embarrass her.”

Clóda thunders down after her, grabs my hat and waves it triumphantly in the air. “I have it now! What are you gonna do?” I get up for her. 

“Hey, now, give me back my hat,” I say, and I wink at Jen, and she winks back, and I chase down the beach after them both. 

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