#also i have only ever done the 'homing dash' by accident during the main story gameplay and haven't practiced it on purpose yet lmao

[boomstab-papa]

Been having a lot of fun with Sonic Frontiers in Arcade Mode, practicing for the Cyber Space Challenge. I don't see a lot of people posting their times on tumblr, so here are mine as of today! I'm no speedrunner (no homing dash, no spin dash (yet), etc) but I AM a fan of some casual Go Fast Have Fun

So this is some casual Go Fast Have Fun.

Also say hello to GeodeDude. He was a gift from my brother and he has John Cena arms.

[carryonmywaywardwriters]

One Day At A Time - Jensen x Reader

A/N: It’s been a while. My days off were spent with writing rather than posting. Now? It’s time to catch up a bit. Have an edited version of a story I’d only just begun getting into before I’d left Tumblr at the beginning of the year. As always, feedback is incredible. And, I hope you all enjoy <3

PSA: I am NOT a minor friendly blog. If you are below 18, please come back when you’re older. I don’t want to lose my blog because you were too eager to grow up. If I discover you, I WILL block. 

Also, this is NOT hate against Danneel. It’s a piece of fiction using real humans as the base. There will be NO negativity against her, the Ackles family, or anything tolerated here.

Upcoming Warnings: Widower!Jensen. Angst. Death. Grieving process. Upcoming smut. Age Gap. And more. Each chapter will be labeled accordingly.

Word Count: Roughly 3,700

“How's he holding up?” Genevieve Padalecki was an actual goddess as she sat across from you in the sunken living room. A loose, white tee paired with ripped jeans while resting on the navy blue couch. Even as drawn and tired as she appeared in that moment, beneath the LeMay hummingbird art, she was incredible. Somehow held mostly together even with the circumstances in front of her. You yearned for that kinda strength.

“He's been trying to smile... Laugh for the kids.” You answered quietly, not wanting to wake the napping children. Or, the resting widower.  As if your voice could carry that far in the massive home. But, it was the first bit of real sleep any of them had gotten since the nightmare had begun. You wouldn't chance it. They needed all the rest that they could muster. “It's falling short...but he's trying.” Your own tired eyes met the red rimmed dark orbs in front of you. “How about you and Jared?” She shook her head, slowly. Her actress's facade crumbling all at once.

“God, I miss her.” The once smooth voice cracked as she fought back the tears. Finally giving into the grief a little. “So...so much...It hasn't even been two weeks, yet, Y/N.” She looked so broken. So defeated. “How am I supposed to survive the rest of my life without my best friend?”

You wanted to give an answer. Wanted to be able to tell her it got better. But, you couldn't. It'd be a lie. Nothing was better in a world without the sunny smile the Mrs. Ackles had bestowed, undoubtedly, every time you turned around.

“I ask myself that question almost every second of everyday.” Jensen's deep voice was ragged as he stood in the hallway. His hair was spiked from the tossing and turning he'd done while he'd tried to escape the reality of his new life. Your heart shattered again at the sight.

“Jens-”

“It's okay,” He was gruff, but not harsh as he cut Genevieve off. Too worn to even begin to try to be angry. His jeans and shirt were wrinkled. Beard untrimmed. Eyes red and glazed with grief. “We're going to be okay. Danneel...she'd want that.” If he said it enough, he might just believe it. “Kids still out?” You could only nod. A lump too large for words to pass rested in your throat.“Good.” His head bobbed with that. As if in a trance. “I'm gonna take a walk...head down to the lake.”

He didn't ask if anyone would watch them. That's what you were there for. His pockets were filled with his beefy hands, and then he was gone as quickly as he'd come.

“I don't know if I can stay here.” You uttered when he was out of hearing range; tossing your hand through your tangled hair. Somehow even more ragged from the brief interaction.

It was all too much. He needed assistance with the twins and J.J. You knew that. But, it was terrifying having to face the grieving process head on. To feel the weight of a love lost residing in the air. Having to stand up to it all while losing your friend in the process. Needing to try and fill the void that was left behind after the accident while holding an entire family together. Anyone would strain under that level of responsibility.

Running would be easier. That was a fact you couldn't seem to escape. It always had been. God knows you'd done it enough in your life. Everything inside of you begged you to take the chance. Flee. And yet...you hadn't quite gathered enough courage to actually try it. Leaving yourself in an odd sort of purgatory.

“He'll understand.” Gen didn't even bother to look back at you. Having latched onto an image of the deceased in the corner. A happy little number showing her and her children.

“Will he?” You didn't believe it. Not even a little. She wasn't there to see the worst of his grief. How alone he was. Your fingers ripped at a hangnail as you pondered over it all.

Jensen had lost his entire future. And with that? He'd lost his focus. The undying optimism he'd once held. His charming dash of humor. Maybe once, he'd have forgiven you walking away. But, not anymore. The kids, his job, and the brewery were overwhelming at the best of times. It was unmanageable even with the help, then. He needed you more than ever.

That's why you'd been hired, initially. To break up the load. Or, so Danneel had claimed. In reality? She'd held everything down just fine with a babysitter on the side. She'd just used it as an excuse to draw you in. Now? It was time to live up to the promise.

You were pulled out of your thoughts with a small sigh, “Even if he doesn't?” Your heart ached at the thought. “You have your own life, Y/N...it's your choice.” Her final words went straight to the point. Injuring you with the bluntness of it. “And if there's anything we learned from all this? Life is too short to fuck around with.”

With that, she took her leave. Needing to find some air. Get back into a head space to handle the other half of the grieving family she was returning to.

You craved the same escape. Instead, the twins appeared. Miniatures of their parents clad in Paw Patrol footie pajamas. Hair mused as they crawled into the comfort you could offer. Solemn, as if their young minds could fully grasp the idea of death. Hours later, JJ walked in the large wooden door. A deep frown etched onto the smooth lines of her face. Her bag dragging the ground as she and Jensen joined. The false cheer emitting from the booming voice only made the tension in the air increase. It was cloaking.

As the night went on, things grew worse. A tight hold on the back of your neck crept forward until your entire skull felt as if it was being crushed. Far from the first time. Zep didn't want the lasagna you'd made. His once ravenous appetite long gone. Justice Jay was trying to step up; telling him how he needed to eat. How her mom would have got him to, and that anyone who couldn't get the boy to wasn't trying hard enough. Arrow sat crying, too distraught to take even a  bite.

Jensen had looked so damn lost while sitting in the tan backed kitchen bar-stool that you'd had no choice but to pull out a whistle. Danneel had used it during a girl scouts meeting months before. And then had brought it back around any time the family got to be too chaotic. Another brilliant idea from the lost soul.

Zep settled for a small, microwavable macaroni and cheese that had been reserved for emergencies. J.J was talked down, gently. Not taking away from her grief; simply bringing her back to a softer place. Arrow was able to eat on your lap; settling into the comfort of a woman's touch gladly. The widower watched in a daze. Being the only one in the room you hadn't needed to fix. Until you noticed that he wasn't eating. Leaving you to discard your plate even longer while you coaxed him into following his kids' lead.

Bed time didn't come nearly fast enough. Dishes with two toddlers flinging soapy water across the designer kitchen. Another night of fighting over homework with Justice. All you wanted to do was crawl into bed and never leave.

With a weary sigh, you left the room Arrow occupied to herself. Moving down the stairs as fast as you could to give yourself some distance. Slamming your hand through your hair all the while. Not sure how much longer you could go on, taking care of everyone. You never had time to process. To breathe. God, how you wanted to breathe again.

Your back pressed against the wall after you hit the main floor. Utter relief filling your veins at the lack of noise. Slouching, you turned to look out at the darkened lake. Hoping the peace of it would trail to you. Only to shoot straight up seconds later as footsteps lumbered down the stairs.

“Thanks,” Jensen appeared, looking worse for the wear. Before you could even think to start, he continued, “Seriously, thanks. I don't...I don't know what I'd do...” His throat worked as emotion threatened to spill over. “I know we're a lot.” That was the understatement of the century.

“Jensen-”

“Don't try n' down play it, Y/N.” He kept going. As if he had no choice. Almost as if he could feel your desperation to run, and was trying to stop it. “We're a wreck, right now. But, you? You make...make it a little less chaotic.” His eyes were watery as he talked. The dam threatening to spill over. Guilt snaked through you at the words. And then he pulled out the last batch of words you wanted to hear. “You're a lot like her. You know that?”

“I don't want to...to take her place,” Your words were garbled as you swallowed the emotion. Terrified that you'd be trapped into the empty space she left behind. Breaking all the while. “I don't...I don't want to just step into the role.” Your own eyes watered as you aired your fears. Gasping for some kind of air. “I don't know how...how to play mom full time. Or step in as the pretend wife of a TV star. I can't even take care of myself. That's why she brought me here.” The emotional fall had been doomed to show up, eventually. You simply hadn't expected it to be so soon. Or so in his face. But, that didn't stop the tirade of emotion leaving your lips. “I want her back, too. I want her to walk...walk back through the door, like every time she's left. To thank me for looking out for you guys... T..tell me how strong I was for holding down the fort... until she got back.”

Because that's the kind of woman she was. She'd loved her family. Her friends. Her careers. And most of all, life. She'd built everyone up. Having her gone had tore them all down.

A tear trailed down your face as you realized Jensen was openly crying. Silent as the water ran down both cheeks. Drop after drop as he fought back a sob. You comprehended then, the enormity of what you'd done.

“Y/N-”

“I'm sorry!” Cutting him off, you tried to find something to say. Anything else. But, words escaped you again. A gasp left your lips when he brought his hands up to your arms, but you didn't have a chance to pull away. He tugged you close. Breaking you further. His arms encompassed you as you both cried deeply. Letting out everything you'd held back since you'd gotten the call about the accident. “I'm...I'm s...so...s...sorry.” You hiccuped into his chest. No longer feeling the need to be strong. His own body shook as he tried to settle back down. “I'm...I'm such a...such a bitch.”

“You're a good friend.” He breathed out in a broken sigh when he could finally gain enough composure to take a step back. But, he didn't break the contact. Needing the sense of closeness as his world spun. “She would have been...she would have proud of you, you know.” You lost it again at that one. Thinking back to the day that had wrecked all of your lives.

Danneel had been going to the brewery. Just as she had everyday. She should have come back. She should have never have been found on the side of the road. A hit and run. The bastard who was guilty had yet to be found.

“I'm sorry,” You pulled away from his grasp completely that time. Wiping at your face clumsily.  Snot plugged up your nose. Your cheeks were stained from the tears. “What I said...I didn't mean it.”

“You did.” Jensen stated easily, falling back onto the closest couch. His head resting in his hands. “That's okay, though.”

“It's not.” Your eyes landed on the image from the wedding that rested on the coffee table as you dropped beside him. It was the closest you two had been in the entire time you'd known each other. Picking it up, you looked closer. Basking in the bit of joy that still resided inside the walls of the home. “She was beautiful.” Your thumb stroked over the image. “And, funny. Smart as a whip.” You'd thought you were all dried out, but another piece of water made its way down your face. “It was hard to not fall in love with the energy she put out there.” Gen had said Danneel had been her best friend. She'd been yours, too. Even though you'd only held her in your life a short time. “She saved me from myself...did you know that?”

“Kinda,” He answered carefully. His own eyes drawn to the ten year old image. “She never gave me the full details.” He leaned in closer, the pad of his finger brushing away the small piece of dust that gathered in the corner. “She just told me that you needed help...and to pretend that she did.”

“That sounds like her,” You whispered, your lips tugging up in a lopsided smile. Thankful to the ghost in the room. “I'd been kicked out of my boyfriend's place. He got bored, or something. I really haven't figured out the 'why' if I'm being honest with myself. Can't even remember why I was with him.” Your hand came back up to wipe against your face as your mind trailed back. You'd lived down the road. Only for a week or two. A perfect stranger. Your bag had hit the grass as she walked by with the twins. A daily stroll turned into more. She'd watched as you stared at the door in disbelief after it slammed shut. “She asked me if I was okay. I lied and said I was...she didn't believe me.”

“She's...She was good at that.” He caught himself trying to keep her in the present. You didn't bring attention to it. Didn't want to hurt him anymore than you already had.

“Dee didn't think twice. Packed me up and took me to a motel. Took my phone number to check in...” If you tried hard enough, you could still remember her holding out her phone. A simple smile on her face as she waited for you to do as told. Knowing you'd cave. You hadn't expected her to really call. Had been oddly relieved when she had. “I had trouble finding work, so she offered a place at the brewery. I didn't know how to take that kind of an offer.”

“Now that you mention it...” His head dropped to the back of the couch as he got more comfortable. Eyes closed as he traveled back in time mentally. “I remember that,” He looked a little lighter as he thought back to his wife. The frustrated call he'd received while on set about the woman who 'needed to come to terms' with Danneel's assistance. “The more you resisted, the more sure she was that she was going to help you out.”

“She used the twins.” Not that you'd complained. They were great. You'd spent hours making faces, drawing pictures, and the works with two of the sweetest children you'd ever met. “She was working on handling the paperwork, and asked me to play with them for a bit. Reeled me in like a fish.”

It had started with one day, with food as your payment. Then, it was for a few hours daily for food and some cash. Next thing you knew, you were in a small guesthouse they'd added to property. It had been the beginning of the best six months of your life. Helping with the kids, the brewery, and animals. You'd gotten a side job, but your notice had gone in as soon as you'd been able to. Jensen had needed all the help he could get with Danneel gone.

“Do you regret it?”

“She gave me a whole new life,” You sighed out, not quite answering the question. Looking at the animated face that rested in the frame. “And instead of being able to hold up? I break in half of a month...” Shame coursed through you.

“To be fair,” His voice was scratchy, “we're all a bit broken right now, Y/N...” No truer words had been spoken.

“What do we do, Jensen?” Your head rested against the back of the couch as he took the frame. Wishing like hell he could travel back to the day encased in ink, you were sure.

“We take it one day at a time,” It's all he knew how to do. Nothing else made sense. It was all too unpredictable. “It's hiatus...We don't have to worry about the show, for a few months. For now?” He tapped the glass, “For now, I'm going to take care of her babies.” The determined, pained note in his voice made your chest ache. “I know that I haven't been helping much-”

“Don't...” Letting him tear himself down wasn't something you could stand. “You're doing better than anyone would dream.” Your hand reached over and squeezed his. Offering a bit of comfort. Not knowing how else to handle it all. “Take care of yourself, too...Eat. Try to sleep. Take your time to clear your head.”

“You could stand to do that, yourself, Y/N...” He swallowed tightly. His own guilt raising its head. He'd been so stuck inside his own mind that he'd missed all the warning signs. How slow you moved. Raw pain lining your features. All of it amplified by how long it had been ignored. “Go... get some sleep. We can start looking for someone else to take over, tomorrow...if that's what you really want.”

With that, he led himself to his room. Leaving you to rest on the couch. Trying to decide if that's what you really needed.

–

“Morning, sleepy,” You whisked the batter. Working to get it as smooth as you could. Zeppelin rubbed his eyes deeply. The green dinosaur pajamas seemed shorter than they'd been the night before. He was growing fast. He'd need more soon. “Blueberries in your pancakes?” A tired nod was your answer as Arrow trailed behind in her favorite Elsa covered nightgown. “Chocolate chips?” Another sleepy, head bob followed. Justice Jay wasn't quite as easy. She was filled with seven year old independence. Ignoring the clothes you'd set out the night before in a way that only a strong headed child could. Instead, donning herself in a purple top with yellow leggings. Her hair, all but the back, brushed neatly. “Strawberries?”

“I can do it,” Her eyes turned up to look into yours. Demanding independence. After all, she was woman of the house, now.

You simply nodded, handing over a bowl of batter and the strawberries she wanted. They were pre-cut. All she had to do is mix the two together. You even let her flip them; feeling more than generous. It was the weekend, after all. And she needed to feel in control of something. Her mood increased slowly, but surely. Maybe I'm onto something...

“Smells good,” Jensen's lips smacked as he walked into the room, as you served up the first round of food.

His casual clothes were less wrinkled than the day before. He seemed more alert. Less like a bottle waiting to explode. The crying, despite how much everyone hated it, was good at clearing some of the pain. At least, enough to make everyone semi-functional.

“Good,” You gestured as you poured a bit of batter from each bowl onto the griddle. “Eat.”

“What about you?” His brows snapped together.

Gone was the mess he'd witnessed the night before. Mostly. The bags still rested beneath your eyes- something he hadn't noticed until tears had caught on them. However, he couldn't help but to zero in on every detail.

“I'll eat in a minute. I'm almost done.” The spatula waved his way. Killing any hope of him taking over. “Now, you eat.”

“Yes, ma'am,” He grumbled, sitting down with his children. Muttering about you being a bully to earn little giggles.

Slowly their personalities began emerging for what felt like the first time in forever. Zep was making zooming noises as he splashed his plane shaped- or as close to it as you could replicate- pancake into his syrup. Arrow was humming to herself, kicking her feet. Spreading more than enough butter across her crown shaped breaded breakfast- princesses were her current favorite thing. Dark hair bouncing on her head as she moved. Little J. Bird was telling her daddy about the animals they'd seen on their school outing the day before. And Jensen? He was enthralled. Giving her every bit of the attention she needed.

Your lips tugged up as you pictured Danneel watching over her family in the back. Her little content smile resting on her face as she looked at all of those she loved. She'd be leaning against the counter, ankles crossed with a headband holding back the hair that escaped her bun. Happy as a lark.

With a deep breath, you walked over to the table with the second plate to ensure that everyone got their helpings. When Jensen's eyes met yours again, he mouthed 'thank you'. You sent back a 'you're welcome' quietly before turning back to Zeppelin as he let out a mini roar, seeking the attention on him. In that moment, you understood. You weren't going anywhere...

Part Two

@winchester-ofthe-lord​

Dean/Jensen: @akshi8278​

Forever: @dean-winchesters-bacon​​ @supernaturalginger​​ @lilulo-12​ @awesome-badass-cafeteria-sauce​

[i-dont-want-your-hysteria]

PSA- How It All Went Down On February 10th

Today is the one year anniversary of when I got into Def Leppard, and how everything on this blog came to be becuase of today. Below is the entire story of how I came across Leppard, and how this blog came about. 

Happy one year!

Let me get one thing clear- I definitely grew up on Def Leppard in one way or another.

My dad’s been a huge fan since ‘83, so of course, I heard their music growing up. However, I didn’t exactly know it was them that I was hearing- I just always heard their name from my dad. I kept my own taste in music, and never paid attention to them (since I didn’t exactly know who they were).

So, the road to my current state of Leppard-loving actually began at the beginning of my sophomore year (fall 2016). For some reason I "rediscovered" Sugar (as in I never knew the title or the artist of it but always heard it as a kid) and started listening to it a lot. A lot.

During my sophomore year, I transitioned my music taste into classic rock. I don’t remember how this happened, but it was for the best.

 At the end of my sophomore year, I "rediscovered" Animal (same scenario) and started listening to it a lot, but never listened to any other song by them voluntarily. 

In the summer following this (summer 2017), whenever we burned a fire on our deck, we would always play Weird Al/ Electric Amish (stuff like that) when we were out there late at night. Eventually, one night in July, I was out of ideas of what to play so I asked my dad (a huge DL fan) what I should put on and of course he simply says "Def Leppard." I asked him what song and said to just pick one, so I thought, “oh god I don't really know any of their songs and I don’t know what he likes, what should I pick? Okay, I’ll pick one I don’t know. Let's just pick the first one that comes up that I don't know" and it just so happens that that one was Hysteria, and I put it on and immediately my dad goes "Ahh.. you had to pick this one...” and tilts his head back, looking up at the sky.

He then told me the story of the first time it was played for the rest of the band (which isn’t 100% true, but this is just what he knew) he said that one of the guitarists (it was actually Phil and Sav) played what they had so far for the rest of the band around a campfire like we were doing (which turned out to be some of Sav and Phil's Irish friends).

But it felt really cool being out there with this song playing, and it was the first time I had ever heard it, too. Hysteria was my favorite song within a week. But, still, I could probably only name 3 or 4 DL songs at this point (I apparently did know more, but none by name). Those 3 or 4 DL songs kinda defined that summer for me, funny enough.

October of 2017: I don't exactly know how it happened, (I think I heard it on the radio) but I rediscovered Photograph (I actually knew this one by name) and became OBSESSED WITH IT FOR ALL OF NOVEMBER. Making music videos in my head, writing it into my NaNoWriMo novel, listening to it whenever I could, just wow- I love it. That's when it became my favorite song of all time (and it still is- tied with Hysteria).

It's January of 2018 now, and I'm still cooing over Photograph and Sugar and Hysteria and Animal, then January 14th, 2018 comes around- I almost meet Rick by accident, then a week or so later I'm watching the Metal Mayhem block on MTVC...

A video ends, it fades to black, and then suddenly I hear that "pck......" pluck of a string that echoes away and my heart jumps- “IT'S PHOTOGRAPH OHMYGODOHMYGOD...!!” 

It occurred to me right then and there that I had never seen the music video before (or even considered that there may have been one)

It had ALSO occurred to me that I had never once actually looked at a picture of the band. I'd never seen their faces. 

So I’ve got a favorite song I’ve been obsessed with for a solid two months, I discover its music video, and look at the band who sings it for the first time- and who starts singing my absolute favorite song of all time but an absolutely daSHING young man in a Union Jack tank top and a white scarf.

And then he hit me out of nowhere and I actually said to myself "God... the lead singer's actually kinda cute... like... really cute..." followed by an "oh no" shortly after because I knew I'd eventually fall madly in love with this simply adorable man who sings my favorite song, and I’d remember that that is what started it all (but that's not what started it all. It was simply an “I’ve been down this road before and this is typically how it starts.” I was more shocked than anything that my dad’s favorite band had a pretty cute lead singer- like how was that possible?) I was now, however, teetering on the edge of falling into an obsession... anything could set me off. 

And it finally did- on February 10th, 2018. My dad was taking me to a drama club rehearsal, and Bringin On the Heartbreak came on the radio. My dad turned it up and went "Yes! Old Leppard!" and at the chorus I went "WHAT'S THIS SONG CALLED I THINK I'VE HEARD IT BEFORE"

It was just the chorus I remembered, not exact words, but it just sounded all familiar, the melody of their forces, the screaming of the words, I'm pretty sure I heard it a really long time ago. And thus, it had begun. I went home, I found it on our iCloud and downloaded it.

Then I remembered my dad saying something when he was drunk about how "I nEED ROCK. LIKE ROCK. I'M TALKING LIKE- PYROMANIA. TWICE."

So I thought "I really really like a small handfull of Def Leppard’s songs. I think I should listen to them more. I'll listen to Pyromania- twice." (I’d heard of the album beforehand but never listened to it- or had I?). So I did one day. I listened to it. Twice. And BOOM; there were at least 4 songs on there right off the bat I most definitely recognized. Turns out I did know a ton of songs by Def Leppard- I just didn’t know it was them.

And of course I looked into them a bit more, hearing about all their popular stuff, listening to all of Hysteria, FINALLY looking up that handsome son of a bitch's name (Joe), finding out that one of the main composers of my favorite song went and died before I was born (Steve), and finding their more popular songs, and listening to all albums soon enough. 

I kept going back to tumblr to find pics of them and such, but there weren’t a lot. There wasn’t much on here at all about them. Whatever I did find, though, I reblogged. I was straight up obsessed within days. That week was crazy for my old tumblr. 

However, at the end of the week, on Feb 18th, only a week after it all began, I accidentally deleted my tumblr account (long story, don’t ask). I was honestly devastated because I had it for almost 4 years and all that history was now gone in the blink of an eye. Within the hour, I restarted and created a new tumblr account. I was lost on here and didn’t know where to begin, or get back on my feet. For one thing, I got my old url back ( @mccoys-killer-queen ) and immediately made my background the same pic of the guys as it was before to kind of trick myself into thinking nothing had changed.

I was wrong, and that was a good thing.

I got back into a fresh new blog, and started going around to people and asking them to spread the word on what happened and to hopefully get most of my followers back.

To this day I don’t remember all of them, and that’s been a good thing so far.

While I was doing this, I started talking to @raised-on-radio (whom I had only become mutuals with about a week earlier), 

“thinking about legit starting a def leppard blog tho” I said in the tags of a post I reblogged. She sent it back to me saying that I totally should (thanks, by the way!). And while I wasn’t totally serious about it at the time, I thanked her for the support so early on.

The next day- literally- the next day (Feb 19th), I messaged her and said that I couldn’t help myself, and made a DL blog (you’re looking at it right now). I’d never had a sideblog before, but within a week, I really enjoyed it (and obviously, I still do). Upon looking at this dead/sleeping fandom on tumblr, I realized right away it needed some sort of revival- to become like other fandoms in the modern day. There was no fanfic (on tumblr at least), there were no memes (oh heLL NO there was not), there wasn’t much circulation of posts, and it just felt dead- which I KNEW it wasn’t. It was very far from it.

Over the next month or so, it seemed now that I was involved with the fandom, it was starting to awaken in some ways. There were people actually posting content, more people were making blogs, memes got involved (I’m taking the credit for that, lmao, it seemed no one else posted memes except me and @stupidpicturesofdefleppard ). I don’t want to say I caused this awakening, but it just seems that it happened around the time I got involved with everything. A divine coincidence.

The year that followed was amazing in so many different ways. In a year, I went from not even looking at a photo of the guys and not even knowing their names, to interacting/having one of them and their official twitter interact with me on Twitter a few times, to meeting one of them in person (and putting my arm around him and having him call me ‘darling’), to having a year long obsession that’s still going strong, to knowing much more songs by them than any other artist, to knowing more facts and history about them than anything else, to being able to recognize them if given the slightest detail, and to being absolutely in love with every member and everything Def Leppard has done (not in that order!)

One year later, here we are! The past 365 days since I first heard Bringin’ On The Heartbreak in my dad’s car has been one hell of a story that’s taken me months to completely type out, and I can’t thank everyone enough for somehow making me gain 364 followers in the past year for something I never thought would get off the ground! If I told myself a year ago that I’d be where I am now, I don’t know what I’d think of it. I’d think it absolutely crazy- which it is!

But I wouldn’t change a thing about the last 365 days, that’s for damn sure. 

Rock on, guys!

[lupizora]

Curiosity

This was my piece for the @thebnhaspacezine! It was an honor to work together with so many amazing artists and writers to raise funds for The Trevor Project! I enjoyed the whole process greatly, and it was fun to indulge myself into writing about Mecha suits and space with no other than the kickass Kendou (she is one of my favorite BNHA girls in the series). ^w^

Also, a big thank you to my lovely beta readers, @kacchansass and @myloveistoblame for their tremendous help into polishing this story. 

This fic wouldn't have been the same without you~ ♥

Genre: Science Fiction/Adventure

Pairing: Gen

Rating: G

Word Count: 1996

Summary: Satellite Maintenance Leader Kendou Itsuka has faced several challenges during her duties in the past. When an accident occurs, Kendou's choice brings her a step closer to the answer they had been searching for all along.

“Ground Control to Major Tom. Do you copy?”

Kendou smiled as her T-5 mobile suit came to a halt in a series of tremors. The crew never stopped finding new ways to joke about her promotion for the past six months. It didn’t bother her though. Kendou considered it endearing that they indulged her when she was blasting classical music during work. It made the routine of the Satellite more bearable.

She flicked the intercom switch over her head. “Major Tom to Ground Control. How are you guys?”

“Same old, same old.” Fukidashi’s voice wavered through the speakers, the volume rising and lowering as if he was underwater. It was a common characteristic of his species as their heads were an ever-shifting liquid. “Anything new to report, Major?”

Kendou glanced to her right. Floating like a pearly white lance in front of Beta, the Satellite continued its orbit around the planet. Her mobile suit clung on the third crescent structure that circled around the main shaft. Its slow rotation always allowed Kendou to see Alnitak Aa in the distance. Despite several parsecs separating them, her home planet was not able to hide the blue supergiant star. It reminded Kendou of a permanent sun rising behind an invisible horizon.

“Nothing out of the ordinary,” she said. “Dunno if the others have anything else to report.”

“Aren’t they with you?” he asked.

“I’m on my way to them.” A cold feeling traveled along her spine, and Kendou restarted the suit. “What’s wrong?”

Fukidashi took a lot of awful seconds to reply. “We haven’t been able to reach them for fifteen minutes now.”

“And their marks?”

“They are all glitching except yours. I thought it was another interference honestly.”

She sighed. “No need to panic. Make sure backup is on standby and wait for my signal.”

“Roger!”

The T-5 gained speed, its legs thumping against the surface of the Satellite. Her heartbeat pounded as if Kendou was the one running, and her link with the suit wasn’t the only thing responsible. Even the slightest deviation from the routine amounted to a threat. That was the nature of working on nothing remotely Earth-based.

The construction site came into focus along with the bright red TALOS suits of her teammates. They were under attack. Bots swarmed over their every direction as if the surface had come to life. Whatever they did must have been serious to receive such a massive reaction. Kendou didn’t want to point fingers at the moment. She wanted them safe. With a powerful jump, she landed on a robot that threatened the T-6 of Kodai Yui.

“You okay?” Kendou asked.

Kodai gave her a thumbs-up with the suit.

Kendou pointed in the direction she came from. “Communication works that way. Tell them we need reinforcements.”

Kodai seemed hesitant but lead the T-6 away nonetheless.

Up ahead, the rest of the team took a stand against the onslaught. Kendou dashed to their aid, tearing a robot from the T-13’s back.

“Nice save!” Tetsutetsu shouted through the intercom.

They stood back to back, striking down any blue light that moved. The security robots were quick on their four legs. Graced with sharp teeth and claws, they were set on tearing the TALOS suits apart.

The last member with his T-1 was kneeling a few meters away. “Care to explain what’s going on?” Kendou asked him.

“Malfunctioning,” Awase said, panic coloring his words. “Give me two minutes.”

“That’s no simple malfunctioning. What did you do?”

“Nothing! I swear!”

“It all started after we cut that damn cable,” Tetsutetsu grumbled.

“You did what?!” she yelled.

“It snapped on its own! The thing was at least a hundred years old for fuck’s sake. Whoever thought the TALOS suited this job is beyond me. I mean, look at these!” Awase rattled his suit’s burly arms. “You’re putting them to better use now.”

Kendou punched a robot out of the T-1’s range. “Stop complaining like an old man and tell me the plan.”

“I say we punch the thing into oblivion,” Tetsutetsu said.

Awase cursed under his breath. “I’m trying to glue these things together and bypass the security protocol on this delicate equipment. And this is your two cents?”

Kendou didn’t disagree with his reasoning. They strived to maintain a balance with this ancient machinery in the hope that it’d reveal its secrets. Violent approaches were frowned upon for that reason. They had to do something though. Damaging one small part of the Satellite wouldn’t be too troublesome. After decades of human space exploration, the technology still needed a good whack from time to time. Tools don’t make craftsmen; it is how they use them.

“Tetsutetsu! We’ll go with your plan!”

The T-13 turned around mid-punch. A jumbled mess of vowels came through the intercom as its owner tried to object.

“You serious?!” Awase screamed instead. “What part of ‘This is delicate equipment’ you didn’t catch?”

“We are running out of time! I’m gonna do it,” she said. “Just get out of the way.”

“Are you sure, boss?”

In the past, Kendou would have never done anything this reckless. She would have analyzed every variable and form a cohesive plan. They were in space, the most dangerous frontier humans had ever crossed. One thoughtless action and her life would have been at stake. But she would do anything to protect her team. After going through a lot together, their bonds ran deep enough for her to consider them as family.

“Yes! Now take him out of here!”

Tetsutetsu grabbed the T-1 from behind. While Awase struggled to free the suit from his wrestling hold, the T-13’s thrusters led both suits into the darkness of the cosmos.

The moment they were out of reach, Kendou slammed her fist on the control panel. Cracks spread on the Satellite’s surface beneath her feet. She felt rather than heard the rumble it produced, waiting until it stopped to pull her hand back. The suit’s fingers opened with ease. Nothing seemed damaged. Whopping cheers resonated through the intercom as she looked up to reassure them. Then all hell broke loose.

The explosion was soundless, as everything in space should be. So the T-5’s speakers only received Kendou’s screams. The destroyed arms unraveled outside her broken windshield like puzzle pieces floating away to join the stars. Numb and in great pain, Kendou plummeted helplessly under the crescent. Beta’s sole star appeared before her. Together with Alnitak, they cast a crown of light over the planet. Blues and reds and yellows spread around her like spilled watercolors over a dark canvas. Despite her desperation, Kendou was still wishing to protect this breathtaking view with all of her heart.

As she continued her descent into the planet’s shadow, a slice of light remained flickering outside the suit. Slowly, it transformed into a figure much alike Kendou’s. The celestial woman’s fair skin gave off a golden glow, bright enough to conceal the details of her features. Her long midnight hair blended with the cosmos; constellations dancing among the strands.

The woman entered the cockpit as if nothing was there to stop her. With no further resistance, her hands cupped Kendou’s face. They were warm, anchoring Kendou against the crippling cold that wanted to consume her whole. Her breath fogged the glass of her helmet. Still, the celestial’s eyes remained visible like two pools of endless night and knowledge. Leaning close enough for their foreheads to touch, the brightness of the lady’s form consumed Kendou’s line of vision. Her consciousness followed as everything faded to black.

Voices called her name. Someone shook Kendou’s shoulders. Opening her eyes, a blue light greeted her from above. It bounced on Tetsutetsu’s rigid hairdo, giving it a metallic glint. Tears shined on the keratin spikes around his eyes.

“Are you all right?” he shouted.

A cane smacked him on the shoulder. “She will be, if you give her some room to breathe.”

Tetsutetsu stepped back to reveal Shuzenji Chiyo, the space station’s head doctor. Behind her Awase and Kodai observed the scene, visibly relaxing after a good look at Kendou.

They were in the station’s infirmary. Screens stood in place of windows, usually running diagnostics on the current patients—Kendou in this case.

“Boss…” Awase started, clenching his fists on his sides. “We… I’m sorry for what happened! I’m ready to receive my punishment!”

“Wait a minute, man! It was my idea. You should punish me!” Tetsutetsu said patting his chest.

Shuzenji smacked their shins with deadly accuracy. “What are you younglings saying? The woman just woke up. Leave this for a later date.”

Raising her arm, Kendou returned their attention to the bed. “It’s okay... Granny.” Her voice sounded as scratchy as it was on her throat. “It was.... my call to make.”

“But-”

“No buts. She needs rest so get out!” Shuzenji pushed all three through the door and sighed when the opening closed again. “How are you feeling, dear?”  

Kendou stared at her arm. Every part of her body felt sluggish but she could move without thinking. This shouldn’t be possible. In the back of her mind, she still remembered the agony of being trapped inside her own body.

“Thank the stars something disconnected you or the damage would have been significantly worse. Your nervous system is still in shock,” Shuzenji said as she checked Kendou’s vitals. “Security robots and mines? Millennia might separate our civilizations, but we think alike. Such a shame.”

“Granny. I saw one of the Ancients.”

The old lady looked up from the tablet but said nothing, prompting her to continue.

“I wasn’t disconnected. My hands didn’t budge. I couldn’t do anything about the controls. Then she appeared.” Kendou’s breath dropped as she replayed that moment. “Like a ghost in space.”

“People hallucinate many things during a situation like this. Our radars caught no other heat signature than yours.” Shuzenji clasped her shoulder. “This was probably only a vision.”

Kendou nodded reluctantly.

While listening to the rest of the doctor’s report, her luck became apparent. Other than the lack of limb-coordination, she had minimal injuries. Two weeks of rehab and she’d return to her duties without a problem.

The reality of going through it turned out less simple. Her feet refused to step one after the other. Her fingers wouldn’t hold onto anything. However, Kendou had faced similar problems when she first applied for the space program. Truths which had shaped her entire life didn’t apply on zero gravity. This gave her hope and before long, Kendou stood inside the hangar again.

“How does it feel being back?” Awase asked from her left.

Kendou finished securing her long auburn ponytail inside the helmet. “I didn’t expect much and you know what? I wasn’t disappointed.”

He snorted. “For one, I’m glad you’re back. These past few weeks were hell.”

“Monoma can’t be that bad of a commander.”

“Just a shitload overzealous. Not gonna lie. It was a nice change of pace but it’s different with you, boss.”

“Yeah, I’m more likely to save your butt.” She punched him playfully on the shoulder.

“Truer words have never been spoken!” Tetsutetsu said as he enveloped both into a tight hug. “Let’s go, Red Oni Team!”

“Please don’t call us odd names,” Kodai said as they boarded their suits.

Stepping outside, Kendou was pleased to find the same void and stars. The Satellite was in the same spot too; its presence reminding her of an old promise.

“I’m gonna find what you are...” Her nine-year-old self vowed, stargazing from their front porch.

Kendou knew she had only a slim chance of learning the Satellite’s true purpose in her lifetime. It’d be too much to ask for the universe to reveal the rest of its many secrets. But maybe everything was more connected than it seemed. So, if she continued down this path, would it be possible to meet her savior again?

Although the cosmos remained silent, some stars flickered a little stronger than before.

A/N: For those that have purchased the zine, you might have noticed the ending here is kinda different from what's in the zine. The truth is I overestimated my word count and ended up with two additional pages. It resulted in me changing the ending to be fair for the rest of my fellow colleagues. But I really liked my original ending so this is what you see here. You could say the zine ending is exclusive to those who bought it in a way XDD

[springbender-blog]

RULES: Always post the rules. Answer the questions asked, then write 11 new ones. Tag 11 people to answer your questions, as well as the person who tagged you.

I was tagged to do this FMA-centered tag by both @greedoda and @ladywiltshire, thank you soooooooo much!!

I kinda don’t want to do this twice though, so I’m going to take my favorite 5 questions from each of yours and answer those - I hope that’s okay! There are also two questions you both had that were the same so I’ll do those too - a total of 12! You lucky nuggets.

Okay, so, the questions under a read more!.......I WROTE WAY TOO MUCH and there’s a lot of analysis....I got really really carried away. :B

Greedoda’s questions:

1. Which two characters do you think have the best dynamic in the series?

Personally, I have to say I love Ed and Ling’s dynamic? They make a great team and they’re such dorks! The couple of episodes where they’re stuck together in Gluttony’s stomach are two of my favorite episodes. As well as just, how they go from Ling pissing Ed off monumentally (I mean, he does set his “goons” and/or “lackeys” on Ed during their first meeting XD) to being just the closest bros, looking out for each other to the end (which I guess definitely includes Greed as well)! It’s a dynamic I wish we saw more of in the show, if I’m being totally honest. They’re two of my favorite characters, and all of their interactions were hysterical.

2. Would ed like milkshakes?

Actually I think it’s canon that he does!! During the episode where he’s trying to get Scar’s attention by going around and fixing things with alchemy, he’s shown afterwards drinking a milkshake with Al and laughing about how he’s “pretty sure everyone in Central knows his name by now”.

3. Favorite character development?

SCAR’S. OKAY??? SCAR’S. Don’t even get me started, holy shit. We, as the audience, start by thinking of him as just this cold blooded murderer, then we realize he’s Ishvalan, which gives him motive, but we still don’t particularly like him, you know? But that’s only in episode five! 

Throughout the whole show we learn more and more about him, we watch him falter for killing Ed when he throws himself in front of Winry, remembering his own brother doing that for him. We see him bring along Yoki, for apparently no reason at all?? Like, Yoki just runs after him and he could kill him, especially since Yoki caused him trouble! But, he doesn’t? And then May comes along and you can see him accepting her and starting to care about her and listening to her and making sure she’s safe. You see him fight alongside Ed and Al because he HAS to, You see him bring along Marcoh despite all the things Marcoh had done to his people - despite Marcoh begging him to kill him. You see how Winry’s binding of his wound (though not forgiving him) affects him because he doesn’t think he deserves it. You see how his attitude is changed further by Miles, until, by the end, he’s honestly one of Ed and Al’s strongest allies. He rallies a group of Ishvalans to help during the Promised Day. And then joins Miles in trying to reform Amestrian’s view of his culture - HOW CAN YOU NOT LOVE SCAR I DON’T EVEN. !!!!???

4. Favorite villain?

Okay, I’m honestly not sure if Greed counts, so other than him, definitely Envy. I just love that good-for-nothing garbage lizard. *shaking head* They’re so complex!! I think a lot of has to do with their attitude - the sarcasm and condescending yet cheery tone of voice they always sport makes them oddly endearing and funny, despite how much a terrible person they are. And then to find out all of this hides tons of insecurities because they’re jealous of humans. They pretend to be so much and so powerful and unstoppable but they feel like the most inferior worm (and they are - literally). I just...yeah I love their character!

5. What fma merch do you want, or wish existed?

I REALLY WANT AN FMA BLANKET. Like, just something simple, like red with the main crest on it, or something. I know they exist! I also really want a poster!

And now for the Lady’s:

1. Do you remember your first time watching or reading Fullmetal Alchemist? What was your first impression? 

I remember the first time I ever saw it (not watched), I was passing my sister on our home computer. I distinctly remember seeing a young girl in pink with a lot of braids and a tiny panda bear making something glow like blue lighting (*choking noises*) and I asked my sister what it was and she said “Fullmetal Alchemist” and I was like “Oh” and brushed it off because she’d talked about it before but I wasn’t interested? (wtf was my problem??). But maybe a few months later my friend watched it and at that point I just had to. The hype was real when I finally started, and the hype was even bigger for Brotherhood. I remember being halfway through 03 and watching the first FMAB opening and just getting chills, I couldn’t wait to get to it, and boy did it live up to my expectations and more from episode one.

2. Tell me about a scene that really touched your or made you realize something about yourself.

My first thought is immediately the episode “Interlude Party”. I mean, I know that episode is pretty much just a summary of what’s happened so far, but the bits in between with Hohenheim talking to Pinako, to baby Trisha, to especially the part with Hohenheim getting overwhelmed by Father, who stands there laughing at the “puny foolish humans” who live only to die, so they may as well use them - and we can see the shadows of the dancing morphing and turning into something...else - followed by Trisha interrupting this train of thought by that’s what makes humans strong. The fact that we die. The fact that we change. And the fact that that’s what makes us so undefeatable, because we don’t give up. And this is followed up later with Envy being jealous of humans, because of this very same reason - our resilience and determination against all the forces against us, including ourselves. 

And I think that that’s so true. And that gives me strength to keep going.

3. Funniest headcanon you’ve ever seen. Go!

Okay this is definitely a tie. The first is the one where huge rumors sprout up about Ed after the Promised Day and everyone bombarding Fuhrer Mustang about all these far fetched things until Mustang finally says something like “Edward Elric is a 30-something-year-old-man living in Resembool teaching his daughter how to make apple pies” or something like that. The other is the one where Ed is in Xingese history books as “the man who fed the emperor a shoe”, for obvious reasons. That’s just. GREAT.

4. What spurred you to join the fandom?

Actually, it was totally on accident! There was a long, long part of me and my tumblr experience that believed FMAB was NOT my favorite anime. And then I started realizing, I posted a lot of it on my blog? Like, instead of random FMAB between the multifandom mash of cringe and zero tagging systems, it started to become FMA that I saw the most of on my dash and blog. And I realized, like someone had flicked me in the face, that wtf, this show is actually so important to me and where would I be without it??? 

5. Have a fandom meltdown here and tell me why you love your fandom or show/comic so much!

AAAHHH everyone here is SO nice and I’ve managed to keep my dash (mostly) discourse free! Everyone is so supportive of each other and have the same passion as I do for this show. There are SO MANY talented artists, including musical artists, which is amazing, and SO MANY funny things and funny memes that come from this fandom. I’m honestly so glad I’m a part of it, even if I don’t contribute much myself other than screeching in my tags!

And here, the two you both asked!!

1. OTPs! Who are they? Edwin is top of the list!! I’ve shipped them all the way from the beginning, and to see them come together in canon - and in such a NERD WAY - I just love them so much. I also ship Lingfan, Almei, and Royai!

2. Favorite opening/ending number and why?

My favorite opening is Opening 3, Golden Time Lover, for a L O T of reasons. The way it goes from the soft melody in the background to the much harsher tones above just convey all my feelings for it, because this opening is both soft, and rough and to me it just perfectly conveys the stories’ struggle, and the journey forward. The elements of the zooming in and out, the sweeping camera angles, and the sudden changes in the action between teasingly slow and choppily fast. There is SO much contrast in this song, and in the animation to match it. Literally, this opening is a masterpiece and thinking about it makes my heart race.

My favorite ending is Ending 2, Let It All Out. GOD THIS SONG. Wow. It just, tears at my heartstrings a little. A lot. First of all the animation is stunning. Secondly, the lyrics are just, amazing. “There’s no need to pretend you’re so strong” and “Let’s turn our pain and tears into stars”??? Jesus christ, how lovely is that?! And how it changes from half screen to full screen with the climax of the chorus. The emphasis on Ling, Lan Fan, and Fu, and  then on May, as well as Ed and Al and Winry. The way it STARTS with Winry. It just symbolizes strength in such a simple way - through the fear of what living has done, what it could do, and still being able to move forward. It’s a very powerful song to me.

OKAY! And since that took me over an hour to answer (I regret nothing and thank you both so much for giving me the opportunity to gush without restraint...) I’m not going to tag anyone or make new questions myself. Frankly, I’m too tired and my imagination is spent. XD 

I hope you all enjoyed reading this! Thanks again! Love you all!

[devourer--of--books]

blinking in the starlight

I am so excited to tell you that I actually did it. You may ask yourself, what is this crazy bitch up to now?

So, as some of you might know, during Tagatha Ship Week 2016 I originaly had planned to do a Tangled AU one shot. It turned out messy because I had to rush the whole thing to be able to write it in one day, so that draft was deleted. However, I decided to go down this road and write an actual multichapter story. I think it will be about 12 chapters long? Maybe a few bonus chapters along the way? Not sure yet. What I do know is that updates will be slow, perhaps once a month? I keep all information on progress and updating on my profile at FF.net (https://www.fanfiction.net/u/4592257/), so if you wanna know what I’m up to or when the next chapter will be posted, check it out.

Disclaimer: I do not own The School For Good And Evil series and all characters belong to Soman.

Warning: As always, language, because I have a sailor’s mouth. Not half as many as in “if you’re not the bride”, but stil.

- Cece

Caged Birds Don’t Sing

Happy ever after is a little more boring than Sophie thought it would be.

As she finished another book, the blonde young beauty couldn’t help but frown. Yet again, the princess rode off into the sunshine, with a dashing prince, to a ginormous diamond castle, and guess what, “they lived happily ever after, the end”.

How… unoriginal.

Sitting at the big chair placed at the center of the library, Sophie let mind wander around a bit. How about a plot twist? “Princess decides to travel the world”? Or maybe “princess makes new friends and throws the sickest party ever after”?

Not that she was ungrateful.

Sophie had everything one could wish for. She lived in a magnificent luxurious tower, with maids that attended to her every will, all kinds of beauty cosmetics to make sure her wellbeing was a hundred per cent perfect, and she had the most handsome prince in the world.

She had fancy groom-rooms, tons of jewels and dresses, all the shoes a woman could ever hope to own. She was beautiful, rich, charming and she lived the dream. She was a real life princess.

It’s just… When she read about in her fairytale books it always seemed a little bit… greater? After all, she couldn’t even remember most of her own story. She was just a child when it happened.

“Lady Sophie?” her personal maid, Kiko, called by the door. “It’s time for your bath”.

Kiko had been assigned to her a few years ago. She was a little darling thing and definitely an upgrade from that annoying Beatrix girl that used to occupy that position. Beatrix always had that small smirk on her face and the only thing worse than her attitude was that look she sometimes sent Sophie. It made the princess’ blood boil.

Blue eyes filled with pity. Ugh.

Yes, Kiko, the sickly sweet maid that could never look her in the eye was definitely an upgrade.

“Oh” Sophie raised her eyebrow, slowly looking away from her book while lazily uncrossing her long legs “Is it lavender or enchanted bubbles?”

“W-which one would your highness prefer?” Kiko asked quietly, eyes looking downwards to Sophie’s velvet pink heels.

“Both” She answered uninterested, dismissing the shy maid.

The same thing, every day.

Wake up, morning routine, breakfast, free time, lunch, free time, lessons, free time, afternoon routine, free time, guard switch, dinner, free time, night routine, sleep. Wake up, morning routine, breakfast …

Ugh.

You would think that for someone with so much free time, Sophie would have found something to do with it. The thing was, it was called free time, but there was a surprisingly lack of freedom involved.

No matter how many times Rafal explained it was for her own safety, Sophie couldn’t help but wonder what could lie beyond the enormous walls of her tower.

It was a dangerous world, all kinds of sorcerers and black-magic-users could attack her, bandits could get her, she could even end up as a meal to some savage beast, bla bla bla. She got it, really.

But she had already read and re-read every book on the library, no matter how many books her prince would bring her. Her maids took care of the tower, no need to cook, or clean or anything. The gallery could only fit so many portraits and Sophie knew every single detail by heart.

She would ask him when he got home. After dinner, tomorrow.

But tomorrow seemed so far away…

“Sophie?!” The rude exclamation echoes from the main room, and Sophie’s mood turns south very fast.

Aric, the main general of her guard.

Also known as the bane of her existence.

How many times she complained to Rafal about him? Her prince would always dismiss her frustration, presenting her a new jewel as a peace offering, and while Sophie appreciated the gifts, she would trade them all for a chance to kick Aric’s sorry behind all the way down from her tower.

Aric was rude, bad mannered, scary as hell and his only joy came from working the other guards to death and annoying the daylights out of her.

“Lady Sophie, Aric” she gritted her teeth, forcing a polite smile, as she entered the room. “Know your place, will you?”

“My apologies” he smirked, mock bowing, violet eyes never leaving hers.

As always, Aric was dressed in his sweaty black and green uniform, wolfy smile in place and looking at her with that superior attitude that pushed her buttons in all the wrong ways.

Sophie suppressed the instinct of backing away from him, knowing that acknowledging his attempt to intimidate her would only serve to amuse him.

“Apology accepted,” She granted eyeing the general cautiously. “What are you doing here?”

“Master Rafal sent a falcon today. He’s coming for lunch tomorrow, so the guard switch will be done earlier” Aric explains, toying with the small dagger he carried in his sleeve. “Didn’t he tell you, lady?

"No.” Sophie answers, crossing her arms while transferring her weight to one leg “Why would he do that?”

“Does it matter? Ask him yourself.”

“You should stop this attitude, Aric. A little bird by the window told me you were late to work yesterday. Careful, or…”

Aric tensed up, his right hand gripping the silver dagger.

“Or what? I’m pretty sure where I go is my business. You, however, should watch your step…”

“Is this a threat?” Sophie asks, her voice low and incredulous.

A shiver goes down her spine as in a swift movement Aric throws the dagger.

The sharp blade shatters the window, the shards barely missing the blonde waves of her hair and the general smirks while admiring his work.

“I thought I saw a bird. They’re common at this time of the year. Interesting, I keep seeing them near the windows, don’t you agree that they should know their place and mind their business? Accidents do happen, could be dangerous.”

Sophie doesn’t say a thing, green eyes glaring at him.

“Don’t forget to close the curtains; It will take a while to get that window repaired and Master hates birds inside the tower” Aric taunts her in his way out.

Kiko and some other maid appear to clean up the shattered glass, but Sophie doesn’t stay to see the damage. It’s everywhere, and the curtain is probably ripped. Great.

She’s partly furious and partly terrified, her hands shaking like a leaf.

That tended to be the effect Aric caused every single time he went within a ten-meter radius from her.

Not that Rafal would ever let anything happen to her. He promised.

And soon enough Rafal would be back home. Then she could ask him.

Ask him to take her with him the next time he left.

.

.

Sophie is hopeful.

She always is this time of the year. Is near her birthday (tomorrow) and Rafal always visits on her birthday. Ever since he rescued her he visits every two months or so (running kingdoms must keep him busy), but he always stays an extra day or two for her birthday.

Usually she goes straight to bed after her night routine, but today, Sophie sits by her bedroom’s window.

It’s a beautiful view. The forest that surrounds the tower looks emerald green during the day, but Sophie liked it better during the night, when the moon and the stars color the trees in shades of grey and silver. Beyond the trees Rafal told her there are kingdoms, full of evil kings and witches.

Sophie doesn’t doubt him, of course not, but she can’t help but think that it was quite a waste for such beautiful woods to be infested with beasts and bandits and for such evil kingdoms to produce such an alluring light.

Oh yes, the lights.

The beautiful lights that came into view a few days after her birthday, at the beginning of spring. At night, one by one, the lights colored the sky, orange, yellow and gold lit up the sky, irradiating warm and comfort.

Rafal told her it was a festival. The witches set fire to the sky so all the birds would be burnt and fall to the ground.

And that’s why she should stay in her tower, where she was safe. So no harm would ever come to her.

My little bird, Rafal called her.

Because Sophie was a princess for a reason, you see.

She could sing.

But unlike any other singer, she did not sing songs. Oh no. Sophie sang people.

Rafal, mostly.

Everyone had a special tune, an essence. Her prince asked her to sing his at least once every time he visited. He told her that his tune reminded him of the birds that sang every day outside his window when he was a child.

That it made him feel young.

Sophie did not understand what kind of bird could sing such a melancholic melody. Rafal would laugh and then whisper in her ear:

“Blue falcons, Sophie. They are native from my kingdom.”

She wanted to ask more.

But she didn’t, and the information wasn’t offered either.

Tonight, sitting by the window, bathing in moonlight, Sophie tried to remember.

Rafal’s song was slow and husky, in a dark and dangerous pace.

Her mother’s song used to be soft and sophisticated, like an expensive velvet dress.

But Sophie couldn’t remember her own song.

She sang it every day as a child. But, like magic, she forgot.

Rafal told her it might have been a scar from pos-trauma. From her fairytale.

Sophie doesn’t remember when it was exactly, but she might have been around ten.

She lived in a luxurious house in a big estate. Her mother had inherited from a wealthy uncle or something. She loved Sophie’s voice, told her to sing every day. Her father wasn’t much of a fan.

One day, a dark old wizard attempted to kidnap her, so he could sell her voice for money to buy more ingredients for his potions. Rafal was passing nearby and heard the fighting between her father and the wizard.

Her mother hid her in a closet. Told Sophie she should stay there.

Sophie remember screwing her eyes shut and singing her song quietly.

After what felt like hours, someone came to her rescue.

A dashing young man, with shiny white hair and intense eyes greeted her. Told her that her parents were dead, but he was a prince and could keep her safe.

Even back then, Rafal was gorgeous.

And she lived happily ever after ever since.

Tired, Sophie decided that maybe she should have gone to bed: Now, she was tired and Rafal liked her better when she looked her best.

.

.

Stupid Aric.

Sophie’s high heels clicked against the expensive dark marble floor as she paced back and forth, her hand gripping the hairbrush hard enough that her knuckles were turning white.

He should already be here.

The guard switch was done earlier. Aric was supposed be here already. If Rafal arrived and he wasn’t here, his mood would be ruined.

Then, there was no way for Sophie to ask him her birthday gift.

To leave with him.

Oh, she was going to kick Aric out of this tower.

As soon as he got here.

Distracted by her angry-pacing Sophie did not hear the sound of the door opening.

A cold hand gripped her shoulder and she screamed on the top of her lungs, tripping on her heels. Instinctively, Sophie pointed her hairbrush to the stranger, wielding it like one would a sword.

“Woah.” Rafal exclaimed, backing away, hands up in mock surrender. His serious composure was intact as always, but his eyes looked amused. He offered her a hand.

“Hello.” Sophie answered, taking up on his offer “What do you find so funny?”

“Your brush” He told her, brow raised “What would you have done if I was actually an intruder? Get back or I’ll brush your hair?”

“Well, if the intruder was you, it would have worked. Your hair looks like it hasn’t seen one in weeks.” She noticed, taking up on his appearance.

As always, Rafal was dressed in a black outfit, detailed in gold and red, the huge cape trailing behind him, made out of grey-ish feathers. However, his hair was a mess, differing from the usual soft spikes it was usually sported in.

Rafal lifted a brow.

“Really?”

He walked in the direction of the giant mirror in Sophie’s room. His hands fondled with the white locks, sealing them in place.

“Aric usually remembers me to do this before I come inside.” He tells her, frowning “Where’s Aric?”

Sophie can feel the dread of telling him the general is not there and she decides that no, Aric isn’t going to ruin this.

“He must be checking on something since guard switch was done earlier. You can look for him later.”

“Sophie” Rafal narrows his eyes “Where’s Aric?”

Plan B it is then.

“You haven’t even wished me happy birthday yet.”

Her prince seems to calm down a bit.

“I’m sorry, my little bird.” He approaches “Happy birthday.”

“It’s quite alright” She answers, the fake tears drowning her green eyes.

“Please, don’t cry, Sophie.” He hugs her close and whispers compliments on her ear. “I have a gift for you”

“Do you? I was thinking about asking you…”

“Later, my little bird. For now, I’m hungry.” Rafal says, backing away, and Sophie follows him on his heels.

“It’s kind of important, Rafal, and…”

Her prince does not hear and she stops trying to catch up with him.

.

.

“So, you said you had a gift for me?”

The two of them are sitting in the library; Rafal is sipping his coffee (as he always did after lunch), seated at the big chair in the center of the room while Sophie nervously plays with a book, not quite looking him in the eyes, but standing directly in front of him.

“I do” He answers.

He reaches into his pocket and takes out a small box. A ring box.

Sophie eyes go wide.

“Yes”

“I’m afraid, my little bird, this is not that kind of ring”

Sophie’s excitement dies when she notices her prince’s serious demeanor. He puts the mug down, leaning forward, not once breaking eye contact.

“This is a safety ring, Sophie. It’s not a toy. You’ll wear it every day, 24/7. You won’t be taking it off for showers, for beauty treatments or for sleep. If you take it off, I’ll know you’re in danger and I’ll show up immediately. You’ll most likely never have to, but just in case, so we won’t have a repeat of today’s hairbrush incident”

He pulls Sophie’s hand away from the book, and slowly, slides the ring up her finger.

The piece itself was probably one of the most beautiful pieces she ever got from him, and that’s saying a lot. The ring shines in pale gold, dark reflexes running along the metal. Underneath, the words “True Love” could be read in silver. It was very light and delicate, but, somehow, Sophie felt like it yet another thing weighting her down.

“Happy birthday, my little bird. Now, how about you sing me my song again?”

“Thank you, Rafal”

Sophie finds herself singing his song four times in a roll. She quite enjoys the pleased look on his face, as he closes his eyes and lies back on the chair, expression twisted in the rare form of joy.

“Now, my little bird, I need to talk to Aric.” He excuses himself, heading to the door.

Sophie gets up from her chair so fast Rafal actually stops walking. She throws herself in front of him, blocking his way, sheepish smile and hopeful eyes.

“Remember that thing I wanted to talk to you about?” She batted her eyelashes at him, pouting.

“Oh, right”

“Well, since it is my birthday, and I now have a way to stay safe 24/7” She told him carefully “I was thing that maybe you could take me with you when you leave this time? To see our kingdom. I thought it might be a good experience for me, since one day I’m going to be a queen and…”

Rafal’s stoic expression and unreadable eyes were killing her.

“No.”

“But I…”

“No, Sophie.” He said firmly, trying to walk around her.

“Why not?” She asked, grabbing his arm, pulling at his sleeve.

“Are you not happy here, Sophie?”

“Of course I am…”

“Because if you’re not, I can arrange for you to live in a half-assed cottage in the middle of the woods, living out of nothing but berries and water, vulnerable to every single wizard and beast on the forest!” Rafal snapped.

Sophie suddenly lets go of his sleeve, her face losing color as real tears threaten to roll down her face.

“You wouldn’t”

“You’re right; I wouldn’t, because you can’t handle yourself out there. You’re weak, Sophie! Weak like a freaking chicken waiting to be somebody’s next meal! Don’t you understand, no one will ever care for your safety the way I do!”

She lets him walk around her, and as he finally reaches the door, Rafal signs, not once looking back:

“I won’t be home for dinner. Tell Aric I’ll be back in two weeks.”

She’s quiet.

“And Sophie” He adds, “I don’t wanna hear another word about you thinking about leaving this tower ever again”.

The door closes with a soft noise. Almost as soft as the quiet sobs she lets out as soon as he leaves.

.

.

Sophie spends another night sitting by her window.

She warns Kiko to let Aric know Rafal’s message, but after dinner, her maid tells her Aric never showed up to work. She also asks if Sophie need anything but the blonde doesn’t feel like dealing with Kiko’s over sweetness at the moment.

As she stares at the forest, Sophie wonders if it would be best if she left.

Not forever, of course. Just for some time. Away from Aric, from Kiko, from her maids, from the guards…

From Rafal.

Her ring shines in the moonlight.

“Happy fucking birthday.”

Language, Sophie. She can hear Beatrix’s voice taunting her in an old memory of her etiquette lessons.

This is her mouth. Her window. Her bedroom.

Her cage.

She’ll curse as much as she wants.

…Besides is not like anyone can hear her. The walls are thick and it’s late. The only ones awake are the guards posted on the staff levels and in the forest.

A quiet song is audible, and Sophie turns her head down to look at the small bird that sat by her window. She opens it with extra care not to scare the bird away. Upon closer inspection, she can tell it is tired. It’s night after all. Birds are usually day-time creatures.

The song is sad and Sophie can feel it tugging in her heartstrings.

She tries to touch the little animal, but as soon as she reaches for him, it flies away.

Sophie tries not to feel jealous.

It’s a bird. They’re supposed to be free creatures. That’s why Rafal won’t let her built a cage for them to keep her company.

Then why don’t you ever let me go…?

Sophie shakes her head. Nonsense. Rafal is just protecting her. He loves her.

She retracts from the window, deciding that yes, just for today she’ll leave it open. Rafal wouldn’t approve, but if Rafal wanted the window closed then he could come home and close it himself.

Looking back, if Sophie had indeed closed the window, our history might have gone in a completely different direction. Fate has a funny way of intervening in our lives.

.

.

It’s four AM when Sophie hears it.

It’s not very loud, but the soft sounds reach her ears and wake her up. She looks around for the source of the noise, when her eyes lie in her open window.

There’s hook on her window sill. Probably linked to a rope. With an evil bandit coming up to her bedroom, where no one could hear her.

And if he climbed up the tower and got through the guards, what could she do…

Her eyes darted to the ring.

She could call Rafal, he would protect her!

… but then he would be completely right, wouldn’t he? She was just some damsel in distress, like a princess in her fairytale books.

She moved her hand away from the ring.

“You’re weak, Sophie!”

No, this is something she could do by herself.

She walked slowly, making no sound, to the other side of the room, crouching near beauty supplies where the shadows were darker to help blend her blonde hair in the moonlit place.

Finally, after what felt like forever, the intruder sneaked into the bedroom.

Covered in a dark cape, hood covering most of their features the intruder drew a bow, arrow in position, while scanning the room. Sophie held her breath, not daring to move a single muscle.

The bow was put down a few seconds later, returned to their back, as was the arrow. She noticed the intruder carried a big satchel and walked around in heavy hunting boots.

Then, they signed.

“Finaly”

To Sophie’s surprise, the intruder was apparently a woman. At least, they sounded like one.

With all her attention on the so-called woman, who was now walking around the bedroom, Sophie nearly missed a new character’s arrival.

“I don’t think so” the new voice said.

It belonged to a man, about as tall as Rafal. But there’s where all similarities ended.

This man wore a military based uniform, much like her guards’, but instead of black and green, his was light blue and gold, a glowing sword attached to his belt, his feet covered by hunting boots. His features, while still immensely handsome, were rounder than Rafal’s and the strangers hair was several tones darker than her prince’s was, more like her golden sun-kissed tresses.

“You simply don’t know when to let it go, do you?” The first intruder questions the man, arrow ready.

“I told you I would hunt you down. I’ve been told quite a few times that I am a great hunter.” He answers, wielding his sword.

“By whom? Your fangils?” The caped woman mocked.

Despite drawing out weapons, they didn’t show signs of attacking any time soon, the banter between the two getting to a level Sophie would almost label flirty.

This was going too far. If these intruders decided to go at each other’s throats, then Sophie would be doomed. Again, she felt tempted to take off the ring…

No, she just had to do some quick thinking.

The first stranger was a priority, she had a long range weapon and was closer to her, so Sophie had to take her down first. But how…

Her eyes laid on her beauty supplies. Of course!

As quietly as she could, Sophie sneaked her hand to grab a small jar.

Imported from Maidenville, sleeping-rose’s petals.

Great to get rid of under eye bags and it’s tea had anti-insomnia properties.

Also, good for knocking people out in a few seconds or so through inhalation.

Please work.

The jar collided with the front of the hood, knocking the woman to her knees, shards of glass everywhere.

“What the actu…alll…?”

She tried to get up but the petals did their magic. Limp on the floor.

On the other side of the room, the man lowered his sword.

“If this is a trick, it won’t work, witch.” He threatened, but worry was clear in his voice. “Witch?”

He was coming near and Sophie started to panic. He would see the petals and it wouldn’t work unless he got really close to the woman’s face.

Okay, now what to do, what to do, what to…

Is that a brush?

“What would you have done if I was actually an intruder? Get back or I’ll brush your hair?”

Sophie would show him.

With all her might, she threw the hairbrush at the stranger. It hit the center of his forehead and Sophie swore she could see his blue eyes roll back as he too fell down, face first on the floor.

So. That happened.

She did it. Holy… she actually did it.

Who’s week now, Rafal? I’ve got two intruders in my bedroom, and you know who neutralized them? Yours truly!

Oh, god, she couldn’t wait to take off the ring and summon Rafal! He would be so…

…Angry that she didn’t take it off when he expressly ordered her to do so.

And if Rafal got angry with her again then he would not even notice her skills. He would probably double the security and then her tower wouldn’t even have windows!

What to do then?