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anactualcaseofthetruth · 3 years

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Friends Can Break Your Heart Too - Chapter 5 < ao3 link

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Story summary: Mia Flores flees to Santo Padre for one reason and one reason only: her godfather and the man who raised her, Bishop Losa. The last thing she expects is for Angel Reyes to come into her chaotic life and just maybe be the one thing that starts to make sense.

Chapter summary: Bishop gives Mia a talk then Mia and Angel have some fun.

Rated: SMUT. Sex, oral, cream pie, all that good stuff.

A/N: Esai Alvarez in this story is played by Manny Montana with Rio from Good Girls tats! Just a reminder!

Chapter 5:

“Mija?” Mia hears Bishop’s voice travel up the stairs to the bathroom where she’s finishing getting ready for a party at the clubhouse. The boys just got a big payday and that usually means a fun night.

“Bathroom!” she calls back while touching up her mascara, not at all surprised Bishop is the one to pick her up today. Angel was very clear in his text this morning the reason he wasn’t climbing into bed with her was because her godfather mentioned he planned on stopping by. Angel also mentioned that he was tired as fuck and couldn’t wait to see her later.

It doesn’t surprise her that Bishop wants to see her, he always wants to touch base after being gone on a run, and him and the boys did two back-to-back over the last week and a half, with only being home one day in between.

What does surprise her was that Angel texts her when they are on runs. It isn’t frequent, of course, but it is at least once a day, sometimes more if possible. He doesn’t say much, just that everything is going good and everyone is whole, but just the fact that he even tries means the world to her.

Most the time with Esai, Mia didn’t know he was home until she woke up and found him in bed with her, or passed out on the couch, or heard from Bishop that they were home and wanted to get lunch or dinner or something. It was rare for Esai to text her daily on runs—maybe when they first got together or if something particularly shitty was going on with her mom. She got maybe one or two texts over a five-day period, if that.

She hears Bishop making his way through the shopping bags that litter her bedroom floor. “Nice to see you’re spending your money wisely,” he comments.

“You’re the one who said you wouldn’t take anything from me for the first three months,” Mia counters while twisting the mascara closed and giving her face a last once over. “I tried to give you more than half my paycheck because I know I owe you, but you—”

“I know, I know, I’m just fucking with you,” Bishop stops her with a chuckle as he leans on the doorjamb leading to the bathroom. “You’re only doing what I want you to do—rebuild your life. I’m glad you’re making yourself at home, or at least,” his eyes flick back to the mess on her floor, “making a few businesses happy. Took a trip to El Centro?”

“That’s where Letty said the good mall is, and some pretty awesome boutiques. She wasn’t wrong,” Mia answers with a shrug. “I got her a few things too, and I’m not letting Coco pay me back, just letting you know.”

“That’s his fight, not mine,” he responds with hands up in surrender and they both smile at one another. “You look… good,” he settles on after looking her up and down a moment later.

She’s wearing a new pair of Army green cargo pants that hug her ass and thighs but are baggy at her feet. It’s matched with a dusty rose top laced up through her breasts, showing skin the whole way, but has long flowy sleeves. She isn’t wearing a bra, of course, that would throw off the whole look, but is covered up enough that Bishop won’t say anything, even if his eyes do. It should elicit a different reaction out of Angel though.

“I know,” she replies, and he chuckles again, having learned long ago that fighting about her clothes was a losing battle. “Everything went good this week? No problems?” she asks while passing him on her way out of the bathroom and starts digging through the bags for her brand new white Nikes.

Of course, she knows all went well—Angel had told her so, but Bishop doesn’t know that.

“All the drops went good, prisons up the coast and in AZ are flush with enough H to keep our brothers inside on top, and the other charters are making their deliveries,” he informs her.

“And the Chinese? I know their order was a surprise, but it seemed like you all had it handled,” she says while slipping the Air Force 1s on and smiling down at her splurge. Her godfather’s right, it’s nice to have more than a handful of things to call her own again.

“We’re a well-oiled machine,” Bishop assures her and at this Mia chortles.

“You’re definitely a well-intoxicated one,” she jokes, and they laugh once more. “I’m glad everything went well, Bop. You guys deserve this party tonight, you’ve been working your asses off lately.”

“Like we need a reason to party,” he comments, and she grins. “But a big payday does always make the boys more agreeable, and that I’m a fan of.”

“I’m sure you are. I’m ready to go if you are,” she says and slips her phone in her pocket, the only thing she’ll need for the night.

“You, uh, don’t seem surprised I’m here,” Bishop mentions.

“We usually get together when you get home,” she reminds him. “I figured we’d be doing something. It’s past lunch, so dinner,” she adds on with a shrug. “And I’m paying by the way, no buts.”

“Yeah, that ain’t happenin’,” her godfather states easily. “But, uh, wanted to check in, see how you’re doing now that you’re settling in at the job and the house, you know,” he goes on while taking a seat on her bed.

Realization washes over her. He’s not here for their normal post-run hang out, and this whole ‘check in’ shit is just that—shit. He knows how she’s doing with the job and the house, they talk every day, and before she started at the clinic he saw her everyday because she was making money at the clubhouse or scrap yard.

This isn’t just ‘checking in’. He wants to have a conversation about something particular but doesn’t know how to start it.

“I’m having flashbacks to my quinceanera, when you spent an hour talking about how I was about to become a woman,” she mumbles while taking a seat next to him, “but what you really wanted to know was if I was still a virgin because you knew Esai was about to ask me to be his girlfriend and you worried that he was going to deflower me that very night.”

“Did he?” he asks, and Mia looks at him with a raised eyebrow.

“That is none of your business, but no, he did not,” she appeases him, which isn’t a lie.

Technically, because she wasn’t a virgin that night, so when she had sex with Esai after her party she wasn’t deflowered. Not that he needs to know about that, there are some things her father doesn’t need to know. Esai was her first, but she isn’t fan of the word ‘deflower’ nor is she interested in talking to Bishop about the concept of virginity. No man’s dick is important enough to change any part of her identity.

“Good, good,” Bishop murmurs and nods. “My warnings didn’t stop you from slow dancing with him at every chance that night, though.”

“Bop,” Mia sighs and crosses her legs, “why don’t we do what we didn’t manage then? Just ask me what you want to know or tell me whatever it is you want to say, because it took me a good year to realize what you wanted from me during that long, excruciating talk before my party started.”

“I thought I was pretty clear about how decisions you made that night could affect you for the rest of your life, and how you needed to protect yourself, and do what you thought was right,” he replies.

“I was fifteen, Bop,” she reminds him. “Besides that, I knew Esai was going to officially ask me out, so I had a little more on my mind than figuring out what you were actually trying to tell me,” she goes on. “Plus, I was dreading what you all would say during your speeches, which I was right to because it was another hour of men talking about my virginity without actually talking about it and I was mortified,” she says then remembers that this isn’t the conversation her godfather wants to have. “What is on your mind, Bop?”

“Look,” he starts and leans forward onto his knees, his hands clasped together between them. “I know this shit ain’t my business, that we try to stay out of each other’s personal lives, but if it involves my club and one of my guys, I should at least know what’s going on.”

“What are you talking about?” Mia asks as dread trickles down her spine, not sure exactly how dumb to play. She doesn’t want to give away information he doesn’t know while he’s fishing for whatever it is he wants to know, you know?

Bishop continues, “I know these guys, Mia. I know them, I know their habits, their routines, and I know when something is off with one of them. They are my family just as much as you are, I’d die for them, and they’d do the same for me.”

“That’s morbid, but sweet,” she comments innocently.

“I’m being serious, Mia,” Bishop says, his voice booming. “I need you to be honest with me.”

“Then ask me what you want to know instead of trying to trick me into saying something,” she responds, her tone now just as serious.

“When we’re on runs and we’ve reached our drop point and we’re bone tired, we spend the night,” he starts. “But, boys being boys, they don’t always spend their time sleeping, if you know what I mean, and Angel is no exception.”

Mia’s stomach sinks. Does Bishop think she’s dating Angel and trying to tell her he slept with someone else on their run?

Sure, she and Angel aren’t together, but they agreed while they are hooking up to only hook up with each other. Then again, with the clinic opening she’s done little more than eat, sleep, work and repeat in the last two weeks. Maybe since she’s been too busy and tired for sex lately, he started to look elsewhere. After all, that’s what Esai used to do—get his needs met when on a run. It meant she was less likely to run into whoever he cheated with, and it also meant it was with a girl who knew better than to expect anything more from him.

“Okay,” Mia manages after a minute, not sure what else to say, and not sure why her chest feels like an open wound. It’s not the first time the guy she’s sleeping with stepped out on her when on a run.

So, Angel broke their deal, she doesn’t know what Bishop has to do with it, especially since he wasn’t supposed to know they were sleeping together in the first place. If he thinks they are dating does he think Angel just cheated on her? He always stayed out of her and Esai’s relationship—that is, until she brought him into it because she was a stupid, heartbroken kid who wanted her dad on her side, not caring what position it put him in with the club.

“I don’t know what you want from me, Bop,” she murmurs. “You know the rules, what happens on a run stays on a run, and I don’t know what this has to do with me.”

“I want you to tell me the truth about what’s going on with you and Angel, Mia,” he insists as he turns his face to look her in the eye. “I wanna know if you’re the reason why the guy who never makes the smart move and chooses to sleep on a run actually has done just that ever since you moved here.”

Oh. “Oh,” she mumbles and thinks of what to say as warmth blooms in her chest and she fights the urge to smile. He didn’t cheat on her!

Well, of course he didn’t, because they aren’t dating. He’s just the best friend she’s sleeping with.

“I know you two are close, and at the first I thought it was just him actually being tired, but it’s been months and—”

“Angel and I aren’t together,” she cuts him off quickly. “If we were, I would have told you,” she assures him. “That’s not something I would keep from you. I know what being with a guy in the club means, the power it holds, and the weakness it can be. I wouldn’t keep it a secret from you. Angel and I, we aren’t doing anything like that.”

“You sure about that?” he asks with a look of disbelief on his face.

“Yes. We’re sleeping together, that’s it,” Mia admits because there is no point in hiding it now.

They haven’t exactly been discreet. The boys know, Letty almost walked in on them, it’s only been two weeks and a few of the girls at the clinic are already whispering about him. Besides, Bishop’s too smart to think they are just friends; he knows the both of them too well.

“And we’re friends. Good friends, more like best friends, even though that makes us sound twelve,” she mumbles as an afterthought. “We can talk to each other, no bullshit, and he makes me laugh, but we’re just friends, I promise.”

“Friends,” Bishop repeats and then barks out a laugh.

“We are!” Mia insists. “I’m not fucking with you.”

He stands from the bed, a hand attempting to stifle his laughter. “No, no, I know you’re not. I know you believe you’re friends, that’s what makes this funny.”

“Bop!”

“You know, I was friends with your mother once,” he says.

“Ew! No, we’re not—this is not the same thing,” she tells him, standing so she can look him in the eye.

“Your dad was friends with her too,” he goes on.

“Enough, can we go now, please? You got the information you wanted, I’ve been adequately traumatized, I think we’re done here.”

“Yeah, yeah, we can go. Just, be safe, will ya?” he pleads, his eyes much softer now.

Mia groans. “We went over this before my quinceanera too, Bop. I know how to use a condom and have my end taken care of—”

“That’s not what I’m talking about,” her godfather cuts her off. “I mean, I’m glad you’re using protection, but I’m talking about this,” he said and jabs a finger at her chest. “Your heart doesn’t give a fuck what’s going on up here,” he says and now points at her temple. “You have control over a lot in life, what you wanna do, where you wanna live, the stuff you wear and how you show yourself to the world, but your heart? That fucker you don’t have much control of, and it’ll get you every time, trust me. So, you protect it any way you can, you hear me?”

Mia nods and bites her lip. “I hear you, Bop,” she assures him. “But you see what you just said, that’s what you should have told me before my quinceanera,” she says. “That is the straightforward kind of shit a fifteen-year-old needs to hear.”

Bishop grins and leans forward to kiss her forehead. “Shut up and get on my bike, will ya?”

“Sure thing, Papa,” she answers and leads the way down the steps and out the door, completely missing the look on Bishop’s face at her calling him dad, even if only in passing. If she had, she probably wouldn’t be calling him just ‘Bop’ much longer. “But I’m still paying for dinner!” she calls over her shoulder, not caring to listen to his response because she isn’t going to fold on this one.

Hours later Mia tilts her neck to the side, giving Angel room to continue his hot kisses, her eyes trying to focus on the fire in front of them, but everything is getting hazy. “I’m starting to think I shouldn’t have told you,” she murmurs, hoping he thinks her low tone is because she’s trying to be quiet, not because she’s breathless.

“What you mean?” he wonders, his lips now at her ear, his teeth teasing at her lobe.

“You wouldn’t be torturing me like this if I hadn’t told you Bishop knows,” she moans and pulls away when he hits a particularly sensitive spot. “We need to stop. I told you we have to be respectful when he’s around.”

“Baby, this isn’t disrespectful,” he insists, his hands now playing with the lace strings at the front of her top. “If you want to see what that looks like though…” he says and tugs on the knot.

“Angel!” she gasps and slaps his hand away. “Be good.”

He grins and pulls away, leaving an arm around her shoulders and leans back in their bench seat. It’s the backseat of what probably was some kind of station wagon that the boys pulled out of the scrapyard. It fits three, and since they are so low to the ground Angel’s legs are spread out in front of them, otherwise they’d be touching his chest.

“Fuck, it feels good to be home for more than 12 fucking hours,” he sighs while scooting down the seat even more so his head can rest on her shoulders. “Feels even better to know I get to spend tomorrow doin’ nothing but you.”

At this, Mia laughs, and it’s full and hearty. “As long as you make it worth my time,” she comments. “I do only get one full weekend off a month, you know?”

“Mi dulce, have I ever not left you shaking uncontrollably on my cock?” Angel questions while lighting a cigarette, his actions very nonchalant after the sentence he just dropped.

“Hey, there’s a first time for everything,” she teases him.

He shakes his head at her. “Keep talkin’ shit, we’ll see how tough you are later,” he warns as he decides he isn’t comfortable enough and moves so his head is in her lap, his legs taking up the rest of their seat.

“Ooh, I’m scared,” she sing-songs.

“Better be,” he insists as smoke escapes his lips. “I just spent the last week on the road with dudes, busy as fuck, and without tasting my girl for sixteen days because of her job. I have needs, querida.”

Mia rolls her lips together to keep from laughing. “My poor little drug smuggler,” she coos. “Did you have a tough time partying in Oregon?”

“Yeah, fucking right. It always turns into a pissing match up there,” Angel grumbles. “They are the biggest charter next to Oakland, so they think they got bigger balls than the rest of us. The rest of ‘em forget they wouldn’t have any H if it wasn’t for Santo Padre risking our asses in the tunnels, over the border, and riding it up the fucking coast.”

“I’m sure you guys didn’t have a problem reminding them,” she comments with a hand carding through his hair.

“Didn’t have to,” he replies, “E did it for us. He’s still new to the prez patch, so he’s making sure everyone knows their places, that even though his pop isn’t the president of Oakland anymore doesn’t mean they aren’t in control.”

Mia’s movements stumble. “E? E—Esai was there?”

“Yeah. He likes to make himself known on big hauls, says he’s getting his hands dirty too, not just getting rich off our work,” Angel tells her. “Earns a lot of respect that way, and he gets to know everyone, even prospects.”

She nods, her eyes studying the orange glow. “He does have a way of making everyone feel special,” she mumbles. “Did he… did he, um, ask about me?”

Angel inhales deeply. “Asked Bish,” he says with smoke leaking from his mouth.

“What did he say?”

“I don’t know, they were walking away, wasn’t my business to listen,” he reminds her.

“Not your business?” Mia demands. “I’m—we’re best friends, it’s your business if I say it is and it is.”

“Oookay?” Angel says with his voice on the verge of laughter. “What did you want me to say?” he asks while flicking his butt into the fire. “’Wassup bro, you know the only girl you said you’d ever love? Well, I’m fucking her regularly. She says hi’?”

Mia shrugs. “You coulda gone without ‘the only girl you’d ever love’ part, I feel like that’s a little blow the belt,” she offers, and he chuckles.

“You’re alright with the ‘fucking her regularly’ part then?”

“I mean,” she starts with another shrug, “I’ve heard enough about his exploits, he can hear some of mine.”

Angel takes her free hand and links it through his. “You miss him. Just call him, querida.”

“He didn’t talk to you at all?” she asks, ignoring him, and his suggestion, as she does every time she thinks of it herself.

“We spoke, I guess? Said hi, asked how shit was, I said good, asked how his shit was, he said good, we laughed at something dumb Pac said—”

“Pac was there?” Mia questions, her voice sad as it tapers off. “Of course, Pac was there, he’s Esai's El Pacificador,” she mumbles to herself. “What’d you laugh at him for?” she demands with a punch to the chest with their connected hands.

“Ow! Nothin’! It was a joke. We weren’t laughing at him, geez,” Angel defends.

“Pac’s the fuckin’ best, he was always being made fun of by assholes when we were kids, but… he did it on purpose. That way they weren’t teasing anyone else,” she tells him. “Then Esai came around and a fight would break out. I was the look out,” she says with both nostalgia and pride splashed across her face. “We were the three musketeers.”

“Did that extend to when you and E started dating—stop fuckin’ hitting me!” he exclaims in a laugh.

“No, it did not,” she answers anyways. “But Pac felt left out so I’d make sure to plan stuff with the three of us,” she goes on. “He used to get upset because girls were afraid to date him knowing if they hurt him I’d fuck them up.”

Angel stares up at her and licks his lips. “Call them, baby, I know you miss them.”

“It’s not that easy—”

“It is. Especially with Paco, you think he’s gonna bring up what happened? He’s just gonna be happy to talk to you. He’s like a fuckin’ puppy with a gun.”

At this, Mia laughs. “You’re not wrong, but if I talk to Paco, he’s gonna tell Esai and—”

“So fucking call them both,” he cuts her off again. “Esai’s fucked you over enough times that he definitely owes you one. Call, you don’t have to say you’re sorry or explain shit if you don’t want to. If he’s fuckin’ smart he’ll just pick up wherever you left off.”

“Owes me more like a hundred and one,” she mumbles. “I’ll think about it, okay?”

“Alright,” he replies easily.

“That’s… that’s it? You’re not gonna keep pushing me or tell me I should do it or anything?” she wonders.

Angel sits up and gives her a shrug, “Ain’t my place. I said my part. I think you should reach out. You’ve never given Esai your new number, so he can’t do it. If you want me or Bish to pass your number along, just say so. Otherwise, it’s on you.”

Mia leans forward and presses a kiss to his lips. “You’re cute, osito,” she whispers.

“Don’t spread it around,” he murmurs, then kisses her again.

“Imma spread something later,” she says and Angel chuckles against her lips. “That sounded better in my head,” she admits and drops her head to his chest.

“To be fair, I didn’t think we were spreading mulch around,” he replies while wrapping his arms around her shoulders. “Fuck, that reminds me, I told Bish I’d cut your grass tomorrow.”

“You just volunteered for this?” she asks as she lifts her head enough to look him in the eye.

“He was about to make EZ do it, and I didn’t want him at the house—I’m tryna keep you naked most the day tomorrow—so I said I’d do it, that I was dropping by anyways,” Angel explains. “Now that he knows we’re fucking he knows that was a lie, but,” he stops with a shrug. “Imma still do it.”

“You’re trying to keep me naked tomorrow, huh?” she says with a smile. “Then how am I gonna give you a beer dressed in a tiny bikini top and my shortest shorts while you mow the lawn?”

Angel pulls her by the back of her neck until they are kissing. “That ain’t happenin’ unless you want me to take you right there in the grass.”

“Only if you’re on the bottom,” Mia counters, “I feel like grass would rub in a bad way, you know?”

He laughs as he drops his head to her shoulder. “So, you want my ass on fire?”

“Better than mine!” she replies. “And you get to stare at my boobs, so no complaining.”

“Never,” he murmurs, about to go into another kiss when they are interrupted.

“Either of you need a beer?” they hear over their heads and look up to find EZ.

“If we fucking did you look real empty handed,” Angel tells his brother, then grimaces when Mia smacks him once again. “Fucking stop that,” he mutters and rubs his chest. “It’s the same spot every fucking time.”

“No, we’re good Ezekiel, thank you,” Mia answers for them after a pointed look at his older brother.

“We are?” Angel asks with crinkled eyebrows.

“If you plan on driving me home, yeah,” she tells him and he pouts, but doesn’t speak up because he knows its code leaving soon.

He does, however, stand up. “Alright, if we’re heading out I gotta take a piss,” he says, taking her hint. “You should too, you know, for what I got planned for you,” he says while sending a wink Mia’s way before sauntering off.

“You know,” EZ starts while plopping down next to her. “He’s heading into the clubhouse like he hasn’t whipped it out in front of us all week on the road.”

“Yeah, most the girls have probably seen it too,” Mia agrees, and EZ laughs in agreement. “Woulda saved him a trip.”

EZ looks to see his brother disappear into the clubhouse. “Look, I, uh, wanted to talk to you real quick before Angel comes back.”

“Should I be nervous about this?” she asks, racking her brain for something EZ would need to talk to her about, but comes up with nothing.

“No, I just—” he stops and lifts his butt up as he reaches for his wallet. “When we were teenagers, Angel was real into art. He was really good at it too, it was something he and our mom did together.”

Mia nods, not wanting to tell him she already knew this, but is intrigued all the same. What could he have to tell her?

“But, uh, back then he doodled on everything. It drove our parents nuts. It would be all over the mail, the newspaper, his homework, everything,” he goes on. “He, uh, he stopped when Mom died, and as far as I knew he hadn’t gotten back into it,” he stops and looks to make sure Angel isn’t on his way back yet. “But, uh, before we left the motel at one of our stops, the guys made me go in to check the rooms, to make sure we didn’t leave anything. I saw this and took it without thinking,” he says and pulls a folded piece of paper from the wallet to hand to her.

She opens it with eyes crinkled to find a sketch of her done in pen.

“When I looked at it closer later I thought you should have it,” he finishes.

“I… um,” she stutters, her eyes glued to the paper. It’s only from her shoulders up, and it is rough, but undoubtedly her.

“You’ve brought out a part of my brother Pop and I haven’t seen in over eight years,” EZ tells her as she studies the sketch. “He’s not as angry or closed off. He actually even mentioned our mom the other day and we never talk about her.”

“EZ, I—”

“You don’t have to say anything, Mia. I know you guys are just friends, but I know that my brother feeling lighter, and it’s all because of you. I just wanted to thank you and give you this. It’s of you, so you should have it,” he insists.

“Thanks,” she murmurs while refolding it and putting it in her pocket. “He’s my best friend, the best I’ve ever had.”

“You’re the best he’s ever had too,” EZ tells her and stands, then offers her a hand. “Just don’t tell Coco, a fight might break out.”

Mia shrugs as he helps her up. “I don’t know, I think I could take him, he’s small, you know, and I have training.”

“I’d pay to see that,” he replies and they are laughing when Angel comes back.

“Aye, get your own girl best friend,” Angel jokes while slipping both arms around her shoulders from behind, making his little brother shake his head and walk away. “You ready to go?”

“I don’t know, but I am ready to cum,” she says then laughs at her own stupidity.

Angel turns her around and looks at her as if embarrassed for her before shrugging and lifting her over his shoulder.

“Ah! Angel!” she laughs with hands on his hips to steady herself as he heads for his bike.

“I’m just giving you what you want, mi dulce,” he insists. “Better yell bye to Bish, you’re gonna be busy for the rest of the weekend.”

Mia tries to take in her surroundings between the strips of hair blocking her vision, looking for her godfather in the upside-down masses. When she can’t find him, she just takes Angel’s advice. “Bye, Bop! I’ll call you tomorrow!” she shouts and the people around her laugh, Angel included.

“Alright, be safe!” she hears and raises a hand in acknowledgement at his double-edged meaning, but he has nothing to worry about. She’s on the pill and while Angel is in her heart, it’s not in a bad way, a way that would end in heartbreak like all her relationships do. He’s just her friend because anything more would fuck everything up and she isn’t going to let that happen.

Angel is too important.

It had just been a joke the day before, a flippant comment.

Mia had no real intention of putting on a bikini and teasing Angel as he mowed the grass, but—well, she did just buy one and it is hot outside and Angel isn’t one to turn down a beer, ever.

Him outside in a light pair of gray sweatpants and t-shirt with the sleeves rolled up didn’t help, his skin glistening in the California sun, hair free of its usual gel and so blowing gently in the breeze, and those dark shades on his face—it’s enough to make any girl weak in the knees.

Seconds later she’s running up the steps and digging through her shopping bags searching for the bikini Letty insisted she buy the day before. It’s a warm yellow with long strings that wrap and crisscross underneath her breasts before tying at her back. Instead of matching it with the bottoms, she jumps into her shortest black shorts that barely cover the slope of her ass. She throws her hair up into a messy bun before putting on some lotion, so her skin is extra soft and glowy, and envelopes her in a flowery smell, which she knows Angel is a sucker for.

Mia takes a beer from the fridge, cursing him for not buying twist offs as she searches for a bottle opener just as the lawnmower cuts off.

“Fuck!” she curses and decides to forget about opening it. If Angel actually decides to drink the beer while she’s wearing this they are going to share loud words.

She opens the door to the backyard to find Angel on his knees, his hands on the lawnmower, looking at something. He doesn’t look at her as pushes his sunglasses up into his hair before reaching for his phone and, she guesses, sends a text.

“I ran out of gas,” he calls over, his eyes trained on the cell phone screen. “Do you know if Bish keeps a gas can around?”

“No idea,” she answers while patiently waiting for him to look up.

“He doesn’t,” Angel confirms as he stands, his thumbs flying over the screen with a look of annoyance on his face. “He’s gonna send Creep with a gas can in a little bit, what’re you—” he stops as he finally lays eyes on her.

“I thought you might be thirsty,” she says innocently and holds the beer out, but makes no move to get closer.

His eyes look her up and down. “Are you fucking kidding me?” he asks with no heat.

“What’re you talking about?” she questions and shakes the beer a little. “Do you want the beer or not?”

“Fuck no,” Angel answers. “But if you don’t get in the house right now we’re gonna find out if grass really does burn.”

Mia drops the bottle when Angel starts after her, and she shrieks with laughter. He catches up with her in the living room, grabbing her around the middle and lifting her off her feet.

“You think it’s funny to tease me, hm?” he asks in her ear, his hands splayed across her abdomen now.

“You were teasing me first,” she counters and bites her lip as his hands attempt to feel every inch of her. “Wearing those sweatpants low and showing off your arms. I’m only being fair.”

“You think this is me teasing?” Angel demands of her as he makes his way to the couch, pushing her down onto it. “Nah, I’ll show you how I tease, baby,” he warns before getting on his knees.

In retrospect, she should have known Angel would take this as some sort of challenge. He always does, even if they are just playing around.

Later, she might think he does it as a way to prove himself, even if subconsciously, to show he can do anything she puts him up to because his parents never expected anything out of him the way they did EZ.

But now, as his buries his face between her legs, the psychology of it is far from her mind. Except maybe her own, how she’s a glutton for punishment, but instead of falling into old habits of shitty boyfriends she does this. It’s a healthier outlet, that’s for sure.

“Angel, baby, please,” she pleads when he pulls away after edging her for the third time.

“You think you deserve to cum, mi dulce?” he asks as he wipes her wetness from his beard and starts to leave wet kisses up her stomach and chest.

“Yes,” she breathes and gasps when he nips at her nipple after having pushed aside the cup of her bikini.

“But you haven’t been good,” he tells her before switching to her other breast, teeth scraping and tongue swirling, making her moan and mewl. A moment later he slips two fingers inside her and she sighs at the feeling of something filling her up, even if it’s not as big and thick as what she’s craving.

“I—I have,” she stutters out as she cradles his face in her hands.

“You think?” he asks and his fingers crook inside her just right making her tremble.

Mia nods. “Please, I want to cum for you,” she whispers and pushes her forehead against his. “Angel, let me show you I can be good.”

He smiles at her, it’s easy and carefree makes her heart skip a beat. “Do as I say and I’ll let you cum as much as you want, okay?” he starts and she nods up and down over and over until he starts rubbing slow circle on her clit as his long fingers slip in and out of her. “Say it.”

“I’ll do as you say,” she moans, her eyes struggling to stay trained on his.

“That’s my girl,” he murmurs with a quick kiss. “You’re not going to cum on my fingers or my mouth, you’re not allowed to,” he tells her, and she wants to whine, but knows it won’t help her case. “Soon, I’m gonna get on the couch and you’re gonna ride my dick,” he says, and she nods once more, this time appreciatively. “And you’re gonna cum as much as you can when I’m inside you. I wanna feel you cum on my cock, you hear me? I want to feel every single one of ‘em. I want you to cover my cock in your cream.”

“Yes, yes, okay,” Mia agrees with her hands threaded into Angel’s hair.

“Then, when I think you’re done, you’re gonna get on your knees just like I am now and lick it all off me until I cum down the back of your throat,” he finishes.

“Yes, please. Angel, yes,” she pleads and pulls on his shirt in an attempt to get him on the couch, but all it does is make Angel remove his shirt entirely.

“Oh, baby girl,” he says with a lick of his lips. “I said ‘soon’ we’re gonna do all that, remember? I’m not done tasting you,” he tells her. “Until last night I went sixteen days without this, and I hated it,” he mumbles as his fingers start to play with her slit again.

Mia just closes her eyes and enjoys the feel of his fingers inside her, playing with her, torturing her.

“You’re so fucking wet for me, baby,” he mumbles against her skin. “Look at me,” he orders, and she forces her eyes open, but her eyelids remain heavy. “Feel with me,” he says, his voice much softer now, and takes her hand in his and brings it down to her opening. “Put your fingers in.”

She does as she’s told and her much smaller fingers slide in with no resistance, coating her skin in her slick juices. She moans at the feeling, but it’s nothing compared to Angel’s long fingers, and not even close to his thick dick.

“I want you,” Mia whimpers as Angel guides her fingers in and out of her. “Not me, I want—”

“I know,” Angel cuts her off. “Here, see why yours is my favorite,” he insists and brings her wet fingers to her mouth to taste. She opens for him and he smiles. “Good girl,” he murmurs as her lips close around her own fingers.

“Mm,” she moans at her taste and Angel smiles at her.

He leans down and takes a swipe up her slit and mimics her ‘mm’ before getting up on the couch and shucking his sweatpants off. “C’mere, baby,” he offers, and she jumps at the chance to swing a leg over his hips and settles down on his dick. “Fuck, I missed you,” he sighs as she sinks down on him. “I know I said it last night, but it’s fucking true,” he insists with his hands on her hips.

“I missed you too,” she replies as she starts to move frantically on top of him, chasing the release he’s been keeping from her. Her arms wrap around his shoulders for leverage, and she leans her head to rest against his. “Please, please, please,” she chants as she practically impales herself on his cock.

“C’mon, you can do it. I wanna feel the way you shake around me,” he says and it’s like a switch goes off inside her and she does exactly as he says.

She cums and her body shakes as her pussy trembles around him, but rather than let her come down Angel starts bucking his hips up inside her. “Fuck, fuck, fuck,” she swears and buries her face in his neck as she comes again, not as strongly, but it still makes Angel cuss as she clamps down around him.

Mia’s still trembling when Angel shifts to lie down on the couch, his hands undoing the knot at her back so her bikini becomes slack. He slips it over her head and tosses it to the side before lifting her chin to look at him. “You done already, mi dulce?” he asks while pulling at the back of her knees so he’s even deeper inside her.

She moans, but shakes her head.

“You sure?” he wonders with a thumb circling her clit. “All you gotta do is tap out and get on your knees to finish this, baby.”

“I’m not done,” Mia says once she composes herself, then with a twinkle in her eye stands, hating how empty she feels, even if for only a moment, before turning around and settling back down on him in reverse cowgirl, knowing it’s one of his favorite positions.

“Yes,” Angel groans in pleasure, his hips bucking to get deeper inside her.

She leans forward with hands on her knees and gets her hips going, throwing her head back as she grinds down on top of him. Suddenly, she feels a tug at her scalp, and she’s pulled back against Angel’s chest, her back arched perfectly in the air.

With one hand in her hair, Angel uses his other to reach around and rubs his fingers into her swollen clit. “Where am I, baby?” he asks in her ear, his voice low and full of gravel.

“My stomach, holy shit,” she cries and cums, this time feeling a gush and she knows she’s creaming his dick like he wanted, and it only makes her hips move faster. “One more, one more, please,” she pleads with both Angel and herself.

Angel lets her hair go and both arms move to pull at the back of her knees so she’s folded in half, lifting her in the air as his hips buck up into her pussy. “You’re so fucking tight, baby girl,” he says with each plunge inside her.

Mia completely let’s go, letting Angel take the lead and relaxes the best she can in his arms, her pussy clenching on his cock as she readies to cum.

“Go, go, go,” he chants, and she does with a spasm, her whole body shaking as it does when Angel is deep inside her, pleasuring her over and over again.

She hears him grunt behind her and knows he’s painfully close, he has to be.

When he puts her down, she doesn’t hesitate. It takes all the energy she has left to get off him and turn on her knees, doing as she’s told and takes all of him in her mouth in one go.

“Fuck,” he swears with fingers threaded into her hair so she doesn’t move. “You taste yourself on my dick, querida?” he asks, and she nods as her head bobs. “Suck it all off, baby.”

It’s not even a minute later that Angel is emptying himself down the back of her throat as promised. She opens her throat and takes everything he gives her, swallowing his white heat.

When she lets him go with a pop, she finds his face looking completely blissed out as she wipes her lips.

“Wanna know a secret?” she asks while lowering herself on top of him, his arms automatically wrapping around her, holding their sweat slicked bodies close.

“Mhm,” he murmurs with fingers carding through her hair.

“Your dick is my favorite too,” she admits and hears him chuckle against her hairline.

Before her can respond they hear the loud roar of a motorcycle pulling up. “Fuck, that’s Creep with the gas,” Angel groans and flips so she slides down the side of him onto the couch.

“Have fun finishing the grass,” Mia sighs and feels a blanket being placed over her, making her smile.

“You think you’re real funny, huh?” he asks while hopping into his shorts.

Mia shrugs, then squeals when he tickles her side.

“Aye, Angel, you in there?” they hear as the door starts to open.

“Yeah!” her best friend exclaims and runs for the door before Creeper can come in. “Lemme take you ‘round back,” he says and stops the other Mayan from coming in.

Mia just smiles against her blanket thinking she’s a lucky girl. She’s got a best friend who can fuck her then get up and cut her grass. He’s definitely a keeper.

Taglist:

@joalsglasses @mrsamaroevans @justahopelessssromantic @mrsjaxtellerfan @rosieposie0624 @starrynite7114 @proudlittlewitchbitch @luckyharley1903 @miss-nori85 @thesandbeneathmytoes @jasminee97 @jakiki94 @superhoeva

IF YOU WANT ADDED TO THE TAG LIST LET ME KNOW!

#mayans mc #fanfiction #angel reyes x oc #angel reyes x mia flores #friends can break your heart too #chapter 5 #mayans smut

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pigeonp0st · 4 years

Note

Kara x reader married life? Lots and lots of fluff? 🥺

Kara Danvers x Reader #4

Words: 1,163

Warnings: Cuteness

Notes:

You ask and you shall receive! I hope this is fluffy enough for you (sorry for any spelling mistakes). Also, eat your vitamins people. People don’t usually realize when they’re low on a vitamin and it can cause some serious issues! Getting enough Vitamin D is especially important now that winter is coming. So do it. Maybe check in with your doctor to get a blood test and make sure you’re okay on your vitamins too..okay i’m done.

——

Kara Zor-El isn’t one to be tested. She’s the most stubborn person you’ve ever met, and back when you first met her it used to be something that drew you in. Now though, it seems to be bringing you a lot of problems.

A lot of them.

“Lift up your tongue, Y/N, or I swear to Rao,” Kara threatens you, looking down at you from where you're seated on her bed. Your bed.

She keeps bothering you about taking your vitamins, like you’re some type of child (yes, you may have just been revealed to have vitamin d deficiency, but still). “Doctors are stupid, Kara. They don’t know what they’re talking about,” you grumble.

You’re stubborn too, Kara has come to find out, but she’s always been up for a challenge.

“If you don’t swallow that supplement right now you won’t get any kisses for a month.”

The only reason why you believe her is because she’s in her Supergirl suit, using her Supergirl voice, and sounding all threatening. “You wouldn’t,” you say anyways, resulting in one of her ‘Supergirl looks.’

“Do you really want to test whether or not I care about your kisses more than your wellbeing? I doubt the answer will surprise you.” Kara says, looking smug when she sees the defeat on your face. “Swallow and lift your tongue.”

You do, with no small amount of reluctance, and wait till Kara double checks with her X-ray vision (she could have done that to begin with).

“Happy?” You grumble, burying yourself back into your blankets.

“Very,” Kara assures, grinning and pressing a kiss to the top of your head, the only part visible with the blankets.

“Well, you know what they say. Happy wife; happy life.”

—

“Kara!” You yell into the empty apartment knowing that Kara is always listening to you.

When she told you that the first time it was a bit unsettling, but then she reassured that she’s only ever listening to your heart, and only pays attention when she hears her name.

“Yes?” Kara asks after zooming in. It’s a new record.

“What were you doing?” You ask,

Kara blinks at you, somehow feeling like she’s become your assistant ever since the two of you have gotten married. “Is that why you called me?”

You pause, trying to recall why you wanted here other than the fact that you were missing her. You remember. “I need you to get me some water,” you admit, only feeling slightly guilty, “it’s too far away.”

Kara watches you for a moment, then asks, suspiciously, “are you pregnant?”

If you had the water you asked for you’d be spitting it out. As it is though, you just choke on nothing. Kara moves closer to pat your back. “No, Kara,” you finally breathe out. “Thankfully that’s the one thing your superhuman body isn’t able to do to me.”

Kara lets out a relieved breath, as if for a moment she genuinely did believe you were pregnant. You think you should be offended.

You can’t bring yourself to be when Kara finally gets you your water and then says, “I was at the fortress talking to my mom.”

Your features soften almost immediately, like it always does when Kara talks about her mom, or krypton at all. You pull her into a hug and she lets you. “Did I interrupt?”

“No,” Kara assures, “I was just about to come home to you.”

You nod against her head. “Do you want to go to the zoo tomorrow?” You ask after a pause.

Kara gasps, pulling away to look at your face. “Are you asking me out on a date?”

You shrug, “who would’ve guessed? I like spending time with my wife.” You smirk. “I know. I’m the best wife ever, you don’t have to say it.”

Kara laughs, and her laugh has no right to still make you as free and happy as it does. Kara has no right. “You are,” Kara tells you when she’s done, kissing you with enough force to steal your breath away and then leaving for your bedroom right after. “Let’s go to sleep, baby,” she suggests smugly.

You're whipped for your alien, what about it?

“You still haven’t accepted my date request!”

“I’ll accept it if you promise to take your vitamins everyday.”

——

You concede to Kara’s condition bitterly—because somehow you know you’ll be taking them every day anyways, whether you like it or not—and now you’re at a wildlife sanctuary (you both figured i’d be both a more fun option and a better place to support.)

Kara ends up asking someone if she can touch the lions and gets a very firm no from both you and the worker.

Kara pouts at you, “why? I’m indestructible.”

She’s not, not really, but she definitely can’t get harmed by a lion. It’s not her you’re worried about though. “The lion deserves it’s teeth,” you tell her, patting her arm comfortingly.

Later, you ask the same worker if you can pet the tigers. You try to do it away from Kara but she hears, of course she does.

When you sulk back over to her after your rejection she throws an arm around your shoulder and squeezes you to her side. “You deserve your limbs connected to your body,” Kara laughs.

You try to hide your smile but fail miserably. You know she wouldn’t even let it come to that, so really she’s just being petty.

They let you both touch a baby bear some time later and Kara looks absolutely in love. It’s almost enough for you to threaten committing arson if they don’t give the bear to your wife, but you figure the other animals don’t deserve to suffer. Oh, and neither do the people.

—-

When you leave the sanctuary it’s evening time and you’re exhausted, but Kara’s rambling about how much fun she had so you force yourself to stay awake on the drive to listen to her.

She’s beautiful when she’s excited, and beautiful when she’s happy, so it’s hard to not want to be awake anyways.

Unfortunately your wants don’t align to your bodies needs and you end up falling asleep halfway home, much to Kara’s amusement.

She carries you up the stairs to your shared apartment, helps you change into new clothes while you’re groggy and sleepy, and then, when you’re on the verge of sleep again, she whispers; “I love you. Thank you for being the partner I've always longed for, and the wife I'm still not sure I deserve.”

You grumble and shake your head, mumbling quietly, “You, Kara Danvers, deserve the multiverse, that much is obvious.”

Kara will always be amazed with how much love you give, even while half asleep.

“Wow. You’re very sappy,” she teases.

You push her face away with a frown, “let me sleep. I’ll get back to you in the morning.”

“Okay. I love you,” Kara repeats.

“I love you, too, Wife.”

#kara danvers x reader #kara zor el x reader #supergirl x reader #kara danvers imagine #kara zor el imagine #kara x reader #supergirl imagine #imagine #fem reader #supergirl #kara danvers #kara zor el

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percywinchester27 · 4 years

Text

A lot like ‘Us’ (Part-2)

Word count: 4.3K

Pairing: Sam X Reader AU

Warnings: Depression, some fluff, the usual

Series Summary: Y/N Y/L/N is eager and honestly, still in awe that she managed to get herself an acceptance from Stanford Law School. On the face of it, her life seems as put together, mysterious and independent as one might hope for. On the insides, she carries the burden of past that haunts her till date. Seemingly, she’d left it all behind; that is until she sets foot in the class of the Law School’s youngest, most promising professor.

A/N: The story employs two different timelines from now on. The present timeline for the story takes place in 2014. Fingers crossed that you guys like this part :)

Beta: The sweetest @deanssweetheart23. I don’t know what I’d do without you, Athina <3

Read part 1 here

It was, at least, a couple of hours before you found the courage to step out of the bathroom stall and walk out of the campus. With every turn you made, it felt that Sam might be there around the corner. On every bend, you were afraid that you might bump into him. But it wasn’t just that. Every colour looked brighter, every sound seemed sharper. It was as if the bubble of numbness that cocooned you had suddenly burst open and flung you in the middle of the world- raw and naked. Every sense felt more severe.

You were completely and utterly disoriented and exhausted when you turned the key of your apartment and entered. The inside was a brand new mess of boxes and pile ups. You flattened yourself against the wall.

“Hey!”

You looked around the box to see a brunette in all black sitting cross legged on the floor with a vicious cutter in her hand.

She saw that your gaze had landed on the cutter and waved it around. “This is just for the boxes,”

Meg.

It had completely slipped your mind that your roommate was supposed to move in today.

You whispered a quick ‘hey’ without looking at her, and rushed to your room. Locking the door, you slid to the floor, wishing for the sharpness to go away, willing your safety bubble to come back. It did not. And the senses, the memories kept assaulting you over and over.

*********************

13th July 2008

“Happy average birthday, Y/N!” Jo squealed in your ears, and you flinched back.

“Happy average birthday to you, too. Also, don’t shout!” You said. “ Do you want to announce it to the whole bar? You’ll get me kicked out

“You’re 19!”

“Exactly!” You pointed out. “The legal drinking age in Kansas is 21.”

Joe rolled her eyes. “Seriously, Y/N? Anyone ever told you that you need to loosen the hell up? One beer isn’t going to hurt.”

You gave her a sly look. “You would know, wouldn’t you?”

Jo grinned back.

“Here!” She slid across a fake id. “I already got you the entry pass if anyone asks. But let’s just stick to beer, shall we? Don’t want you throwing up all over the place in case you can’t keep your liquid down.”

“What if Aunt El finds out?” You whispered.

Jo squinted at you. “Mom will not find out what she doesn’t need to find out. You shut up and I shut up. That’s all there is to it.”

Ellen, Jo’s mom had been your mom’s sister. You didn’t want to get in trouble with anyone here, especially since you were here just for a few weeks.

“You have that look on your face again,” Jo said. “The one where your eyebrows all scrunch up and you worry the hell out of that tiny little brain. I never know what you’re thinking Y/N!”

You smiled a little at her whiny tone. “There’s not much going on here anyway,” you said, pointing at your head.

She jingled the little frill on the tight, body hugging one piece she had put you in. “Maybe something will go on after tonight!”

“Hey,” you protested. “You’re the one who’s tango-ing with Dean Winchester… or whatever you two have going.”

“Dean Winchester is the one who wants to Tango with me!”

You rolled your eyes. “As if you’re not interested in him at all.”

She gave you a superior look. “He doesn’t need to know that. Who knows? Tonight he just might get lucky.”

You had been here for a little over a week, and were somewhat familiarised with the people of the town: Langdon Wheeler, the guy who sold old cars next to the fire depot; Sheriff Johnson and Old Rufus living outside the barn, but nothing had drawn you in like the story of the Winchesters. Ellen had told you about it over dinner on your second day living with them. John Winchester had been her friend. He and his wife had died in a house fire years ago. Their four year old boy, Dean, had barely ran out of the house with his 6 month old brother when the first floor blew apart, killing the couple. It was the tragedy of the town, repeated over and over on drunken nights in every bar. The boys had both lived with a friend of their father’s and his wife in Sioux Falls, Missouri before Dean was old enough to live by himself and move back here. Secretly, you had believed that it was good for the boys to have lived away from this gossip mongering town. You’d been here barely for a week and everyone was up Ellen’s nose asking for everything there was to know about you.

Besides, Dean Winchester had made a reputation as the town’s playboy since he’d arrived. Apparently, there were middle aged women knocking on his door every morning with Casseroles and he’d turned them all right back. You knew first hand how miffed women talked, so no wonder Dean was turned into the badboy overnight. It didn’t help that he was extremely handsome- you had seen him a couple of times with Jo- and obviously unachievable. Honestly, you didn’t blame Dean. If those women were gonna snoop into his business and make everyday a funeral for his parents, they got what they deserved.

Jo had put on a stoic face when you had voiced your opinion at the dinner table, leading you to assume she wasn’t a big fan of the man. It wasn’t until you were laying in bed next to her that she’d gone all out on an epic rant about how the town needed to treat those boys better! Dean was an honest man, who made his living by running the only good auto-body shop in three towns and being flirty wasn’t a capital offense. Snooping into other people’s business should have been though, according to her.

Jo had dozed off after a while, but you’d stayed up, looking at the cracks in the ceiling of her room, not thinking about Dean Winchester, but about that little boy, who was only 6 months old when a fire took away everything that he had, save one person. Sam Winchester was lucky that he had an older brother to look out for him. God knew, you had always wished for an older sibling even when your parents had been alive. But like Dean, you remembered what your mom looked like, you remembered the sound of your dad’s voice. Sam didn’t have that. It would have been awful growing up without the reassurance of those memories.

The next morning, you had asked Jo about Sam, and earned her sly smirk. “Getting into the story, aren’t you?” She’d said, but told you anyway. No one knew much about Sam except that he went to Stanford and then Yale to become a lawyer. He showed up during the summers but wasn’t seen out and about much. Though that was about to be changed because this had been his last year and he was coming back to Lawrence this weekend for good. Jo had seen him a couple of times at their diner where she helped Aunt El, but that was all she would tell you.

It was like some epic karma. A lawyer from an Ivy League? You didn’t care if it took hounding this poor unsuspecting dude, but you were going to get it out of him how he managed that? He clearly didn’t have influence or money.

After badgering Jo some more, she had agreed to let you tag along to Dean Winchester’s place when his brother got back.

“Hey!” Jo swooshed her hand past your face. “Earth to Y/N?”

“Sorry!” You said quickly.

She looked like she was praying for your awkward social skills. “I’m gonna get us some beers, and you are going to try to get lucky. Capeesh?”

“Capeesh.” Fat chance of that!

You watched her walk towards the bar, sashaying her hips. How did girls do that? How did girls do anything even remotely sexy for that matter?

Then there was you, dying to get out of this dress. It was off shoulder, and you were starting to feel hella cold. Jo or even Ellen for that matter didn’t have to know about your weird cold sensitivity. Should have brought along that sweater.

“You mind if I sit here?”

You looked up to see this really tall guy standing over you. It was a Friday, and the place was bustling full. There was no other place to sit, while you had three chairs empty right next to you. It would be rude to turn anyone around. Besides, when Jo came back, she’d sush away a stranger, anyway.

“Sure,” you smiled nervously.

He sat down, and you were left to gather your wits for a few moments. The boy was hot. There was literally no other way of saying it. He had long brown wavy hair that fell below his chin, and beautiful hazel eyes.

“Thanks,” he smiled, and dimples appeared at the side of his cheeks.

Speech. You had to actively remember that you had that ability so you could respond… even if it was just a noncommittal shrug.

Oh, what it must be like to be cool. You wanted to keep looking at him and that was exactly why you concentrated all your energy on looking anywhere but him.

After a while of total silence, he asked, “So you’re from around here?”

“Uhh… no,” you said, “I’m just staying at my aunt's place for a bit.”

“Oh, hey! Happy birthday!” He said, holding up the little placard on the cupcake sitting in front of you.

“Thanks,” you replied, hugging yourself, not wanting to explain that it really wasn’t your birthday. It really was getting cold out here. You saw his eyes flicker towards your hands catching your elbows.

“Celebrating by yourself?” He asked, and you felt a little bad for him trying to make a conversation with you out of decency. He could have used the time to hit on a waitress who could have gotten him a seat by the bar… or more. The least you could do was tell him the truth.

“Actually, it’s not my birthday today. It's in October and I’m here with my cousin whose birthday was in April. Since I’m just visiting for a few weeks, we decided to average it out and celebrate our combined birthday now. She’s here somewhere…” you said and found her in the shadiest corner of the bar, hands wrapped around someone in a leather jacket. Then, discreetly she pulled him towards the back exit with her.

Mr. Hazel eyes followed your stare and groaned. “Uhh they’re gonna be in there for a while.”

You wanted to bang your head against the table. Not that you begrudged Jo her alone time with Dean, but you really didn’t know anyone here.

“I’m sorry about that,” he said apologetically, running his hand through his hair. It looked so soft. You wanted to touch it. And his eyes were really kind. It made you a little mad that he was sympathetic about the fact that your cousin had ditched you on your combined birthday outing.

“My brother can be an idiot sometimes,” he shrugged, and you realised that he truly was apologising and his words weren’t judging at all. “I can keep you company till Jo gets back.”

Then it hit you.

“Wait! You’re Sam Winchester?” You blurted

He raised an eyebrow. “I can see that my reputation precedes me.” He laughed nervously and you immediately felt contrite. Way to make him feel spied upon.

“No, no,” you explained. “Jo told me about you, is all.”

“Something good I hope,” he mumbled, looking down.

Suddenly you could actually feel your heartbeat, and the blood rising to your cheeks. Here was the one person you had been wanting to meet and he had just walked into a bar and found you instead! Looking like that.

“So you’re Jo’s cousin?” He asked, clearly making the link that Ellen was your aunt. “How’re you liking Lawrence?”

“Not so much,” you answered honestly. “I’m tired of the pitying looks I keep getting.”

“Yeah, I can relate,” he said.

Of course he could. The bar was crowding up further and more than a few stray glances were making their way towards you. It made you uncomfortable.

“Hey, you wanna get out of here?” Sam asked, then clarified realising how that sounded. “I mean there’s this park right outside. We could wait there till... you know…” he waved his fingers vaguely towards where Dean and Jo had disappeared, light blush creeping up his cheeks.

“Yes!” You said jumping out of the chair. The realisation hit you afresh, how short your skirt was. That’s it, you were never wearing Jo’s clothes again.

Sam stood back and let you pass before him in a true gentleman fashion. You tucked your hair behind your ear, walking ahead, and then out of the bar.

The cold air hit you hard in the face and your naked shoulders, making you shiver.

“Here,” Sam offered you his jacket. He had shirked out of it as he’d walked behind you. “Take this.”

Ordinarily, you’d never had accepted, but it was either that or freezing your fingers off.

“Thanks.” You reached for it shyly, pulling it on and rolling up the really long sleeves. The jacket was so big that it was just barely shorter than your dress. It was pleasantly warm and smelled wonderful.

You had the sudden, maddening urge to move closer to Sam. Of course, thanks to the tiny logical part of your brain that wasn’t short-circuiting, you did not act on it.

Now that he was walking next to you, you noticed what he was wearing- A dark flannel open over the well-worn brown t-shirt and jeans. They were about as ordinary as clothes went, yet he managed to make them look so good.

“Hey, can I ask you something,” he said hesitantly. “Why did you say you were tired of the pitying looks?”

You glanced at him and blurted the truth. “I’m the new attraction, I suppose. My parents died in a car crash when I was five and I’ve lived with my grandmother in a small town a hundred miles south of Topeka since. I really don’t have any other relatives except aunt Ellen and Jo.”

“I’m so sorry,” Sam said, sincerely. He was keeping up with your slow pace. “That sounds awful.”

You shook your head. “No, all things considered, I’ve had a good life. Grandma loves me, and she has always reminded me that I am important to her. I know of kids who’ve lived with a full family and felt neglected, like they were never needed.”

When Sam didn’t reply, you turned to see that he was regarding you thoughtfully. “That’s one way to look at it,” he said after a while.

“You would know.”

He shrugged, acknowledging the obvious- you knew about his childhood. You had already reached the park bench. It overlooked a lovely little pond with ducks resting on the fringes.

You huddled in the jacket, drawing all the warmth from it.

“So, you said, you were staying with Ellen just for a while?” He asked, turning to face you with his undivided attention, like it was somehow vital for him to know the answer to that. Meanwhile, you were having a hard time concentrating on the conversation when he was looking at you like that.

You trained your eyes on your fingers which rested in your lap. “Yeah, I’m hoping to hear from a few colleges.”

Sam perked up. “Really?”

You grinned up at him sheepishly. “I was actually hoping to run into you.”

He looked surprised at first, then his gaze turned skywards. “Well, will you look at that, my stars have finally aligned. This really is my night,” he said with a wink and you couldn’t help the giggle that escaped your lips.

His eyes softened.

“I’m hoping to get admitted into pre-law for the winter semester. I’m still applying to a few places. And you… well, you seem to have managed to do well for yourself.”

Sam laughed, but there was nothing conceited about it… if anything, he looked slightly embarrassed.

“C’mon,” you goaded, “What’s the secret to making it big?”

He narrowed his eyes, as if choosing his words. “I don’t know if there is a secret. My brother would tell you, I got in because I am the geekiest nerd to ever exist… and as lame as it sounds, he might actually be right.”

You laughed. This was the most that you had laughed in ages. It was just so easy to talk to him.

“You know, I’ve always wanted to be a lawyer. For as long as I can remember.” It was the one thing you had wanted with a burning passion.

“And you will be,” he said, simply.

You rubbed your palms against each other for friction, to imbibe some more warmth. Sam’s fingers moved, like he was reaching out. Then he pulled back, as if he thought better of it.

“I know you must have crazy high school girls running after you all the time, but if it’s not too much, will you take a look at my application essays? I don’t know anyone who’s done this before- the whole college thing, I mean- so this would be great help.”

He licked his bottom lip, then gulped. “Of course. It’s the least I can do. You can come by the house anytime you want.” Then he made a big deal of looking behind his back. “I don’t see any crazy high school girls though.”

Laughter sounded behind you, and you immediately recognised Jo’s voice. She must’ve come looking for you.

Sam looked in the direction of the voices, then let out a nervous huff before reaching out for your hand. His palm was rough but also very warm. “Happy average birthday, Y/N,” he whispered. “I’m so very glad to have met you.”

*********************

There was a loud bang and you woke up with a start, your heart hammering out of your chest. You had fallen asleep on the floor right next to your door.

“Sorry!” A voice yelled from outside the door.

You looked around bewildered. Where were you? What was happening?

Oh, this was your new room at Stanford. One easy breath later, it all came crashing down. The class, Sam standing there on the podium, looking at you with shocked eyes.

It had all happened, really happened.

Your hand flew to your chest. You were simply incapable of comprehending this situation… everything was still sharper and clearer… and Sam was here.

There was a knock on the door. “Hey, you alright?”

“Yeah,” you called back. “Just tired.”

“Whatever,” Meg said, and you heard the sounds of footsteps walking away.

You dragged yourself to the bed and lay on it, wishing that you could just zone out, wishing that you could just go back to being numb. It did not happen.

You spent most of the night blankly staring into space, only falling asleep when the sun came up again. In fact, if you didn’t have to use the bathroom, you wouldn’t have left the bed at all, even on the day that followed.

By Friday evening, the emptiness was eating at your insides so much that you finally decided to dress up and step out of the room. The door to Meg’s room was closed. A small part of you wanted to knock on it and apologise for being so rude, but most of you just wanted to run away from not just yourself but from existence itself.

Stepping outside the apartment and into the meadow seemed to liven your senses in a good way, so you walked out onto the street. It wasn’t to clear your head, more like to fill it with something to think about that wasn’t Sam or the absolute horror you felt about going back to classes.

You had worked your ass off for the past several years, both to earn the money to move, and the LSAT score and scholarship that let you into Stanford, and now you were simply blowing all that off by not attending the classes. In fact each minute of Thursday and Friday had felt like a heavy stone of anxiety slowly lowering itself in your stomach… Each minute that you had missed the classes. However, the thought of facing Sam after what had happened, absolutely petrified you.

Somehow being on the street amidst people who didn’t know you or didn’t care, quieted the storm in your head enough to think things through. You had two options. First to go back to College, and pretend like Sam didn’t exist for you outside the persona of a professor, that he was nothing more than a person you saw each day. That seemed absolutely impossible.

Second option was to run away, far from all of this, far from Sam. Again.

You mulled over to two options again and again, roaming around aimlessly till you were back in front of the apartment gate. Sighing, you pushed it open and found yourself looking at a jolly sight.

Along the parapet of the fountain, sat Kevin with Jack and a couple others. They were laughing about something, in fact, Jack seemed in hysterics. You stopped in your tracks.

Kevin noticed you standing there.

“Hey, Y/N!”

“Hey,” you said, over conscious of the state of your appearance. Your clothes were faded and thanks to the humidity, your hair stuck to your face, greasy and rough at the same time.

“Cas,” Kevin said to the one guy you didn’t know, “This is Y/N!”

“Y/N, this is Castiel,” he added. “You, of course, know Pam.”

Pamela Barnes was the landlord, so you had met her before. What you didn’t know is that everyone just hung out in the evening with her. She lived in one of the ground floor apartments. Easy to keep a watch on everyone like that. From what you knew, she was a bartender in one of the more popular bars in the town.

You said your hellos shyly. The awkward interaction was thankfully interrupted by a pizzaman.

“Oh, wonderful,” Jack exclaimed. “Right on time.”

“I’ll see you guys then,” you said, slowly backing away.

“Hey, where do you think you’re going?” Kevin exclaimed. “The pizza is for everyone.”

“Oh, I can’t possibly intrude.”

“You’re not intruding,” Pam said. “It’s our ‘welcome to the apartment’ free pizza ritual.”

“What?” Cas gave her a look. “I didn’t get one!”

Pam kicked him in the shin, and it made you smile. “Of course you did. I just decided to keep it for myself.”

“C’mon, in,” she said, turning towards her flat.

You considered making a run for it, but didn’t see how it would work. Kevin kept you company, prattling on about everyone. Pam had two apartments to herself on the ground floor. With all the walls knocked down, it made one cool living room and three spacious bedrooms. It was a dream house of sorts. The third apartment on the ground floor was empty.

The first and second floor were either university kids or people who worked in the town. There was one married couple who was grossly in love with each other and did not interact with anyone else. And then the three apartments on the third floor. Kevin and Jack Kline, who was majoring in literature from University, lived in the first apartment. Then you and Meg in the flat next to them and opposite to you, lived Castiel Novak, Third year of Med school.

“So, Y/N, how’s Stanford treating you?”

Like a punching bag.

“It’s been good for most part,” you said, tucking your hair behind your ear.

Maybe it was because you were in proper company for the first time in a week or because you hadn’t eaten anything in two days, but the pizza tasted good. The tang of the tomatoes was perfectly balanced by the gooeyness of the cheese.

An involuntary moan left you as you took in another bite and four pairs of eyes turned towards you. You could feel the blood rushing to your face.

“Now that’s how you enjoy pizza,” Jack said. “Y’all don’t know anything about enjoying food. Maybe Y/N could bring some culture to this place. You heathens need it!”

Everyone laughed at that. The knot in your chest loosened.

“Hey, Cas,” Pam called. “Grab that 6 pack on your way from the kitchen.”

“Sure!”

You took another tentative bite of the pizza. It really did taste great.

“Y/N?”

You looked up to see Pam holding a pint over you.

“Er- “

“Here,” Kevin said, handing you a can of coke. “Y/N isn’t much of a drinker.”

“Oh, cool!” nodded Jack. And just like that everyone was okay with it.

You reached out to take the can. “You remembered,” you said through a strangled voice.

Kevin brushed it off with a raise of his shoulders, like it was nothing. “Of course I remembered. We are all so glad that you joined us for dinner, Y/N!”

And he meant it. He really did.

You felt tears press the edges of your eyes. You didn’t know if Kevin noticed, but if he did, he didn’t show it and the conversation flowed around you.

So the second option was out. You couldn’t run away from this. You had yearned for seven years to finally be here, to feel little things, little joys like these… and there was so much more to experience.

That left you with only one alternative… facing Sam. Maybe, just maybe you could manage to live your life without him affecting you like that. Afterall, he was only your professor now, you weren’t expected to interact with him on any level. It was only a matter of two semesters.

“More pizza?” Cas asked kindly and you nodded.

That decided it for you. You were going to take your life in your hands and you were going to walk into that class on Monday morning and never look back.

*************************

A/N 2: The blankness and the bubble that dulls all senses; that’s how I’ve experienced depression. And the sudden sharpness of senses is how I recognised that the worst of it was behind me. Have you guys experienced it differently?

PLEASE let me know what you think of this story?

If you want be tagged, you can send me an ask or add yourself to the taglist here.

Or here’s my side blog @percywinchester27-writes. You can give that blog a follow and turn the notifications on to know about updates.

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@feelmyroarrrr @gabavaldman @im-a-light-child @cosicas-cuquis @bllyjianne @hoboal87 @i-is-for-inspiring @daughterleftbehind @wackiekebab @mylovelydame21 @dancing-the-hellfire-rumba @superbadassnatural @bellastellaluna @babypink224221 @badlittlehabit99 @anathewierdo @sams-bubblegum-bitch @damnitnowimobsessed @fandomoverdose666 @superstarmarvel @atc74 @transparentfestivaltiger @rebel-author-chick @death-unbecomes-you

#sam winchester x reader #reader x sam fluff #sam winchester x reader fluff #lawyer!Sam #professor!Sam #sam winchester AU #Sam winchester fanfiction #spn fanfiction #Ana writes ALLU #ALLU part 2 #Ana writes Sam #anawritesspn #anawrites #q

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everyhowlmarksthedead · 4 years

Text

“SHOULD I TRY?”

GILLY LOPEZ X READER

SERIE INDEX. Chapter 4.

WORD COUNT: 1.7k

Thanks to my lovely beta reader @STARRYNITE7114 💘

AUTHOR COMMENTS: I hope you all enjoy. English isn’t my first language, I’m sorry if I have some mistakes with grammar. The gif isn’t mine.

Tag list: @STARRYNITE7114 @CHIBSYTELFORD @MARA-MPOU @DAZZLEDAMAZON @SAMMSKELLINGTON @ARVEDUA 💥 (if you wanna be tagged, send me a message!)

It's been a long time since you last seen your brother. Maybe six or seven months has pass. You call him every month to talk about how you are, and he knows about Gilly since you met him. He was good with the idea of finding someone who treats you as you deserve, even if he's part of a MC. So, when you called him to arrange the meeting between them and the Mayans, he was ready to approve your full transfer to Santo Padre, if the ‘new’ charter approves it too. You're waiting for them at the entrance of the city, supporting your back against the welcome sign. You're nervous. You know that Marcos will always loves you, and the Coyotes are happy for you, after what you have had to live with your ex. The roars of the motorcycle engines push you out of your thoughts. You can see the six men coming, with a small black van behind them. You know they're bringing you your motorbike. You'll need it probably. And you missed it since you left Tijuana. As soon as they stop, your brother runs towards you, holding your body between his strong arms. He's taller than you and that fact makes it difficult for you to kiss him on the cheek at times. “¿Te tratan bien?” (They treat you well?). He asks with his hands on your cheeks. “Sí”. (Yes). You nod lively. “¿Estáis bien con esto, de verdad?” (Are you truly ok with that?) “Nadie merece la felicidad más que tú, mija”. (Nobody deserves happiness more than you, mija). The oldest member of Los Coyotes, Alejandro, walks towards you to leave a kiss on your forehead. “Hemos preguntado a nuestros contactos, es un club leal. Estamos de acuerdo en transferirte, aunque siempre serás parte de nuestra familia”. (We asked to our contacts, it's a loyal club. We're ok with the transfer, although you'll always be part of our family). “Tú nos diriges”. (You direct us). Marcos says, before hearing the roar of your motorbike. Your old red Harley. You're fucking excited. The ride to Santo Padre, with your hands on the handlebar of your bike, is really awesome, even if you feel like you're going to the slaughterhouse. Gilly has not answered your calls since that night three days ago. Bishop told you to give him some time to think, but that he also knew everything would be fine. You take a deep breath before crossing the front door of the ‘Romeros Bros, Scrap and Salvage’. When you finally arrive to the clubhouse' yard, your heart skips a beat. The whole crew is there, including Stockton and Yuma. You heard about them, but you didn't expect they were coming too, even if it has no sense 'cause they're Mayans too. You stop your motorbike, as your charter does. Bishop walks next to you, with a soft and confident smile on his lips. “Awesome baby”. He says, referring to your bike, you nod smiling, before being hugged by him. “You ready?” “Is it Gilly?” You look for him, between the men away, till you find him. He's there. And you're not sure if it's something good or bad. “I'm Marcos, the president of Los Coyotes de Tijuana”. Your brother offers him a hand. Bishop narrows it. “Thank you for taking care of my sister, even if you didn't know who she was”. “She’s a good girl. With two big balls”. “You don't have to insure it”. Your brother laughs, the president of the Mayans laughs too. “Well, I hope this is the start for something big”. “Family and businesses, sounds good to me too”. You're surprised. There's no hostility between the mexicans, seeming to know each other for a lifetime. It's a good omen after three days of a painful pressure in your chest, that didn't let you sleep.

After all men are sitting at the table, and the prospect of your charter has served beers for all, the meeting starts. Your behind your brother, standing up with your hands on his shoulders. “Club decision”. Bishop says loud. “Do we approve the transfer of (Y/N) to Santo Padre, even if she will not be an active member at first?” “If she's, in da' future, the statutes will have to be changed”. Oscar, the Stockton president, adds. The Mayans and Los Coyotes raise up their right hand. Gilly is doubting. You beg to him in silence. He sighs raising his hand too. “Done”. Bishop hits the table with the gavel, with the right he earned being ‘El rey de los Mayas’. “We will take care of her as one of us. You don't have to worry about”. “I know”. Marcus is sure about that, nodding in agreement. “You can count with Tijuana and Mexico DF for whatever you need. We control that part of the border and the MCs around”. “SAMCRO knows what we’re doing, they're good too. And they, as us, will help you with whatever you need to do in Cali'”. Canche, Yuma’s president, talks supporting his arms on the edge of the table. “Yo! Man! This looks like an arranged marriage!” Angel speaks provoking laughter from everyone. His funny comments always on point, even if you don't laugh. “The party starts now, we hope you're hungry”. Taza says getting up of his chair. Laughs floods the room again. As you thought, they leave you alone with Gilly, the only one who is sitting yet. He has his eyes on the cigar consuming in the ashtray. You walk slowly next to him, having a seat by his side. You don't know what to say. Your heart is beating fast and you're more nervous than ever before. The last three months you've been together almost everyday. You missed him. “I'm sorry… I didn't tell you before. I was scared”. You swallow hard, licking your inner lip. “Gilly, please… Say something”. “I don't know what I should think”. “It's ok if you don't trust me. I'll make you do it again. I'm here. I have brought them, I asked for a transfer, risking me to receive a negative answer from the charter. Risking losing what I know as a family. And I did it for you”. You're trying. You're trying hard, 'cause he's the only man who treats you with love and kindness, without asking for anything bacl. “I missed you these days…” He sighs putting down his head, till his chin meet his chest. “I did it too…” Gilly says in a whisper, before lifting up his head at you. “I promise I'll do everything to make you trust me again”. You raise a trembling hand, holding one of his. “What happened with your ex, uh?” “Gilly, I d…” “No more secrets”. He begs you, entangling his fingers with yours. “I met him when I was sixteen. Bad guy, motorbike, tattoos. Older than me five years”. You start putting your eyes on both hands, looking for the strength you need to continue. “At first, everything was perfect. You know… dates, presents, travels. But then, I don' know how it happened. It started with a punch and an ‘I'm sorry, baby, it will never happen again’. But it happened again”. He's listening in silence, seeing on your face the pain that provokes when you talk about it. But you're doing this effort to prove him that you don't want to have more secrets. “My brother found… me drowning in my own blood”. You have to take a deep breath, holding in the tears that wanna run all over your face. “They brought me here. The last prospect knew the principal of the preschool I work in”. “Did they found him?” He asks referring to your ex-boyfriend. You shake your head with a snort in your throat. “Do you… think I could do the same that he did to you?” You didn't expect that question. And you have to answer with the truth. “It's a… thought that never leaves you, once you live it”. You say pursuing your lips before licking them nervously. “But I trust you, Gilly. You're not like him. And I'm not the stupid girl I used to be”. “Yeah, I'm pretty sure about that, before seeing you kicking that bitch's ass”. He tries to smile softly just for a second. “Gilly…” “Maybe we could start from scratch”. He proposes. Your eyes find his, with some confusion and surprise. “Are you gonna buy me another iPhone? 'Can it be red? 'Cause I look hotter than hell with a leather vest and all its patches”. Gilly laughs loud, and you feel like happiness is coming back to your life. He shakes his head and you can't avoid to laugh too. It was a good point. He releases your hand, offering his again. “I'm Gilly. I was looking at you the whole meeting”. “I'm (Y/N)”. You say narrowing it with a soft smile. “Yeah, I have felt a little observed”. “I'm not good with words, but, did you smell me? People say I smell good”. “Uh, let me see”. You lean towards him taking a deep breath from his neck. You let your nose rest there for a while, before he wraps your waist with his strong arms forcing you to sit on his lap. “No more secrets, ok?” He whispers in your ear, leaving a kiss on your head. “No more secrets”. You nod, looking for his eyes. He presses his lips against yours, softly, eyes closed focused in how much you missed each other. Your hands traveling to his nape, leaving some caresses there, while your mouths make up for the lost time. And it feels better than ever. The pressure in your chest disappear when the kiss finishes some seconds after. He licks his lips, forehead against forehead, keeping his eyes closed. Yours are open, seeing the minimal gesture on his face. “I'll protect you at all cost”. “I know. And I'll fight all those bitches who dare to talk you badly”. He laughs, finding your orbs like they were the most beautiful thing he ever saw.

#mayans mc imagine #mayans x reader #mayans mc x reader #mayans mc #gilly lopez x reader #gilly lopez imagine #gilly lopez

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mysteryofren · 4 years

Text

Think About What I Said

part 18 of So Happy Together

17: https://mysteryofren.tumblr.com/post/617193359827664896/tomorrow-is-another-day

Note: ive spent all day making star wars themed food and desserts! now its time for your treat here kids!

The next morning you felt sick. You would have to see them. At least after today you wouldn't see either of them for a week. You listened as your alarm rang out. You stayed in bed staring at the ceiling. Listening to it blare. Elaine got up, and turned the light on. She looked at you while you stayed still.

“Are you going to tell me about what happened with Rey?” she asked while going over to you.

“Soon. I still can't wrap my head around it.”

“Did she at least tell you what was happening with them?”

“She thinks there's someone else.”

“What a fucking dog. Someone else on top of you two? What could possibly be wrong with him.”

“El…” you said hoping she would catch on.

“What?” she asked while she laid next to you to comfort you.

“It's me.” she wasn't saying anything. Why wasn't she saying anything?

“That night. The night of your game a lot of things happened.” you explained holding back tears.

“You're not with him are you?”

“No, he wanted to cheat on Rey with me. I can't be someone's second choice El I just can't.”

“I know. You shouldn't have to be. You should never be. You deserve to be with someone who loves you and wants to give you the world. What did you and him do that night?”

“We practically made out in my car. He told me he needed me. I ignored him. I've been ignoring him since then. He texts me everyday to apologize and ask me to talk to him, but I just can't hear it.”

Your second alarm went off. Elaine turned it off and got up. “C’mon.”

She held out her hand and you took it. She helped you up, and looked at you.

“You don't need him. I know it's hard. You never liked someone like you liked him, but you’ll feel this again. One day you will find a nice man who loves you. You'll love him too. You two will fall in love, and have a fairytale wedding. You'll have beautiful kids. Then one day they'll ask about your first heartbreak. Then you’ll tell them about Ben, and it wont even hurt.” she was right.

“I love you.” you whispered to her. She hugged you, and you hugged her back. She always knew what to say. She knew what you needed to hear. Once you two let go of eachother you both got ready quickly. You both talked about what she did with Matt the night before heading out the door. They just played video games like they always did, but you still loved hearing about it.

You walked out the door together and walked over to the main school building. Once inside you both said your goodbyes, and went your separate ways. First period always went by in a breeze. It was english a subject you liked, and on top of it Phasma was there with you. Once you arrived Ms.Sloane informed everyone what their spring break reading assignment would be. You had to read the entirety of The Tempest by William Shakespeare. It wasn't a long play so it wasn't that bad. Apparently it was going to be the spring play so she wanted everyone to know it, or at least some of it.

Phasma and you talked the entire period. You told her about what happened with Ben and Rey the night before, but you didn't tell her about the kiss. It's not that it wasn't good enough to talk about, because by the stars it was the most amazing thing you've ever experienced. Its that you knew if you talked about it you would start thinking about him again. You were about to go to Italy for a week, and you didnt wanna whine and moan about Ben Solo the entire time. You wanted to pretend you were worlds away from all his drama.

Sooner or later the time would come. It was 3rd period. You got there early so you could put your head down and avoid eye contact with Ben. or worse. Rey. After some time of having your head down you heard laughing. You decided to look up and see who it was, and of course it was them. They were back to holding hands, and looking happy. Too happy, you thought. They took their usual spots upfront, and you put your head back down. About 20 minutes into class there was a knock on the door. Windu opened it and a student handed him 2 notes.

“Miss Kenobi;” he called out. You stood up and looked at him. “It seems your grandfather is here to take you home for the day.”

Huh. that's weird. He was supposed to be getting you at 2 it's only 10:30. You packed your bag quickly.

“And Mr. Solo. it seems you are wanted in your uncle's office.” you walked towards the door when you heard Windu call out to you.

“Have a fun trip to Italy Miss Kenobi I'll see you when we return.”

“Thank you Mr.Windu.” you said before quickly ducking out trying to avoid Ben. you practically ran once you walked out the door. You were sure he wasn't far behind you, but just in case you picked up speed. Once you reached the office you stopped for a moment to collect your breath. You opened the doors, and stepped in. you made your way to the office where you saw Luke and your grandpa talking.

“Ahh Miss Y/N, I was hoping I could see you before you left.” shit. What was this about. You ran through anything that you could have done to get in trouble. You nodded at him, and he motioned you to follow him. Your grandfather stretched his arms towards your bag and took it for you while you talked to him. You followed behind Luke and you both made your way into his office.

“So,” he began. “I've got a few problems, Y/N.”

“Like what, sir?” you asked with shaking breath.

“Don't worry kid you're not in trouble. Someone is Though.” shit. What was this about?

“I'm not following you sir.”

“You see. I have a bunch of students complaining about screaming between a few students. I've always got a hole in the wall of one of my dorm rooms.” OH THANK THE STARS YOU REALLY WEREN'T IN TROUBLE.

“Oh. Yes, I know what you’re talking about now.”

“So, I have Rey's story. Ben is going to give me his story. I just need yours.”

“I apologize, but why do you think i'm involved?”

“Rey said you went in her dorm after they got in a fight. she also said you helped her.”

“Well, there's not much to tell. I heard a bang then some yelling. I got worried that someone was hurt, so I ran over.”

“When you saw that nobody was hurt why didn't you just go back to your room? You could have gone back to studying, or hanging out, but instead not only did you talk to Ben. You got Rey out, and talked to her.”

“I'm not sure what you're trying to imply.” ok just act stupid and deny, deny, deny.

“Listen, our families have known each other a long time. I've seen how Rey treats you. I know how badly Ben hurt you. What I'm asking is. Why is it that you helped them? You could have pretended like nothing was happening, but instead you chose to step in and stop the situation from escalating.” Was he really asking why you helped? And did you really not know the answer?

“I guess i'm an idiot. I know they hurt me. I know it will happen again. I just was worried about them and I went over.”

“You're not an idiot. You're just kind hearted.” you weren't sure how to respond. You both sat in silence for a few seconds before he broke it.

“Tell me Y/N, what college are you planning on going to?”

“The Pratt Institute.”

“I'm very grateful for everything you've done for my nephews. When you apply to Pratt. I assume you will need a letter of recommendation.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Once you're ready to send the application. I would very much like to write one for you.”

“That's very kind, but I don't want you to feel obligated.”

“It wouldn't be an obligation. It would be an honor.” is it appropriate to cry in front of your principle?

“Thank you so much, Luke. you have no idea how much that means to me.”

“It's no problem. Now let's get you out of here so you and your grandfather can start your vacation.” he walked you out of the office, and down the hall. You saw your grandfather sitting with Ben. They were whispering about something. As you and Luke walked into the waiting area Ben looked up at you. He stood and smiled at you. You turned your attention to your grandfather.

“Are we ready to go?” you asked him.

“Yes, I thought I would pick you up early so you could spend some time with Gideon before we left.” you grabbed your bag from him and turned to leave when you heard him say something. It wasn't to you though.

“Think about what I said, Ben.”

“I will, sir, thank you.” Ben sounded so happy it made you sick.you still loved him. You just knew ignoring him would be the best choice in the long run.

You and your grandfather walked out. He went to your dorm with you, and helped you gather your bags. You wrote a small note for Elaine telling her you would miss her, and wishing her luck on both her date, and her NYU tour. You grabbed your camera and headed to the car. It took everything in you not to ask him what he had talked about with Ben. Did he give him advice on what to do about him and Reys situation? You tried shoving the thought of him to the back of your head. You found yourself doing a lot of that these days. It seemed like no matter how hard you tried he always weaseled his way back into your mind. You decided to try talking to your grandpa to try and keep your mind occupied. You both talked about the trip and what you both were looking forward to doing. He told you about the hotels you would be staying at. You were excited. A change of scenery could help you tremendously. You remembered something all of a sudden.

“Do you think we can stop somewhere for breakfast? It's a bit far out, but I've wanted to go for a while.”

“Of course do you know where it is?” you handed him a piece of paper and he looked at it.

“This is 2 hours away. What if we head there before the flight so we can go to the airport after.”

“Sounds good to me.” you both eventually got to his house. You greeted Gideon at the door, and took him outback to play a bit. Your grandfather sat outside with you spending your time talk, and playing with Gideon. He loved that dog as much as you did. Part of you is glad he got Gideon, not just for you, but for him. Ever since mamas passing hes been alone, and the thought killed you. Now that Gideon was around there was always someone there for him. Someone to talk to. Someone to mess around with. Someone to come home to. you told him that too. you wanted him to know how much you love Gideon, because of what he does for your grandfather.

it felt like you two had been talking for a few minutes. in reality it had been hours. It was time to go. Time to start a new adventure. First though, there was someone you had to see. You packed the car with his bags, and he started driving to the city. A few hours later he parked in front of the small strip mall.

“How did you find this place?” he asked.

“A friend works here.” you got out of the car and waited for him to follow after you.

The smell of coffee was the first thing that got your attention. You weren't really a coffee drinker, but it smelled heavenly. You walked over to the small display case that held baked goods. You could tell it was all fresh as it was fogging up the glass a bit. The cafe wasn't too full, but it had a few people at tables. You could tell they probably came here to work. You looked up at the drink menu with your grandfather next to you. A few seconds went by before a familiar face walked out from the back room.

“Sorry about that, I just had some stuff come out of the oven.” she said while redoing the knot on her apron.

“It's alright.” you replied. She looked up and smiled at you.

“Y/N it's so good to see you again!” she walked around the counter and gave you a hug.

“Pop pop remember Amilyn? She's the woman who helped me that night after the dinner at the Skywalkers.” he took her hand and shook it.

“Thank you so much for helping her. I have no idea what I would've done had something happened to her.” she shook his hand back.

“It's no problem. You have an amazing daughter, sir.”

“Oh she's actually my granddaughter.”

“Either way she's very sweet. Now what can I get you guys.” She took your orders and made them. When she was done she called someone from the back and asked them to watch the register. She grabbed a few cookies from the case, and walked with you and your grandfather to a table. She sat down with you both, and you all talked for about an hour before it was time for you guys to leave. She sent you guys with a few snacks for the flight. You thanked her and both you and your grandfather hugged her before leaving. You walked out and your grandfather automatically asked you to remind him to tell his employees about her shop. Part of you wanted to visit because you hadn't gotten the chance to go. Another part of you wanted to visit, because you knew bringing your grandpa would bring her a lot more business since your grandfather was guaranteed to tell all his friends about it. It sounded weird, but you know small businesses don't tend to do so well for long. You knew if he told his friends they would try it, and then tell their friends. It wasn't much of a thank you, but you knew there was nothing rich people loved more than supporting local businesses for popularity. If anyone deserves it it's her.

You both arrived at the airport. There was only about an hour before departure. You guys rushed to your gate with your bags in hand. By the time you made it to the boarding area there was about 10 minutes left. You guys sat and waited. You sent out a final text to the first order letting them know you were about to board. You sat there anxiously waiting to get on. Finally they had called your flight number. You and your grandfather got on and went to your seats. This was going to be the best week ever.

Tags: @wondering-wishing-well @wumboho @pylopenpolo @duty-isnt-always-honour

#ben solo fanfiction #teen!ben solo #ben solo #bensoloxreader #ben solo x reader #teen!reader #reader insert #kenobi!reader #obi wan kenobi #star wars tros #star wars tfa #star wars au #star wars fanfiction #star wars #amilyn holdo #oc #luke skywalker #mace windu #may the fourth be with you

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iminyourhandskara · 5 years

Text

A Second Schott At Love - Final Chapter.

Kara almost jumped outside the elevator, clearly impatient to hear all about Eve’s version of the date night: obviously, she was a bit scared that she misread everything and that she wasn’t happy with how it went, but she wanted to be faithful in her match making abilities. “Oh, Eve isn’t here yet.” Kara whispered to herself, looking around the office. James’ staff reunion was about to begin, when the sound of Eve’s heels clicking on the floor echoed in Kara’s super-ears; she waved at her enthusiastically, perhaps a bit too much, but they couldn’t even get close because all the employees were now walking towards the boss’ office. “We’ll talk later.” Eve mouthed from a distance, and Kara replied with a thumb up.

“Sooooo?” Kara slid at Eve’s side. “How was it?” “It went really well.” She smiled, “I had a lot of fun.” “Aw, I knew it! Tell me everything.” “At the beginning, I was terrified because I don’t do small talk, but then I felt really comfortable and relaxed, we talked about our jobs, our lives in general, we both like blue, technology, books, Harry Potter specifically, and chicken nuggets.” Kara laughed, that was Winn in a nutshell. “But I have something to say, promise me you won’t get mad.” She suddenly felt alarmed, “Of course.” “The dinner was delicious and the restaurant was so nice and elegant, but..we were still hungry after eating there. So, we drove to Big Belly Burger right after.” “You had two dates in one night?!” Her voice went a little higher than the usual. “Shh, technically it was one big date, but I have to admit that the second part was even more fun, we ate a lot and I didn’t feel judged once. My cousin doesn’t even eat carbs in front of her dates, I have no idea of how she does that. Are..are you mad?” “No, it’s the complete opposite! I’m so happy for you two, especially after those previous dates, you deserve all the fun.” Eve smiled at her friend, “Thank you for arranging this.” “No problem, actually I apologize for not thinking about this before. So, are you gonna see each other again?” “Oh, yes, I forgot to mention we already exchanged numbers…and we texted a lot..and that might be the reason I was late today.” “Woaaah.” “I don’t even know how we managed to text until 5 AM. I haven’t felt this traumatized by my alarm clock since the college days.” “This definitely exceeded every expectation I had. Also, I should probably text Mike that if Winn isn’t replying to his calls, it’s because he’s still asleep. He should be up by lunchtime, though.” The two girls laughed again. “Like I said already, I’m extremely happy for you,” Kara said going in for a hug “but we should get to work, now.” “Right, do I look too disheveled?” “No, you’re perfect.” “Oh, I almost forgot to tell you one last thing..” “What is it?” “…I might’ve kissed him..” Her voice was lower than a whisper, Kara’s mouth was now agape. “Eve!!” “I could not help it, he was so sweet to me..” She was now as pink as her blouse. James called his assistant, she winked at Kara and then walked into the office.

Mon-El was afraid that calling Winn so many times could’ve made his phone explode—it was his first smart phone and he didn’t want to break it after just a few weeks, Kara would’ve definitely killed him. He was about to push the call button again, when he suddenly got a text from his girlfriend: “Winn is still asleep, he spent the entire night chatting with Eve ;), you’ll see him later at the DEO I think” “Oh, that explains it! So, does she like-like him?” “YESSS! We’ll talk about it later, are you going at the bar now?” “Yep, I’ll see you at the DEO as soon as I’m done L” “Ohhh..okay, I’ll see you later babe” “Later, babe!” Mon-El grinned at the screen, she called him babe again and he still couldn’t believe it.

Mon-El and Kara arrived at the DEO and immediately noticed that Winn still wasn’t there. “That boy sleeps like a rock.” “I’m here! I’m here!! Mon-El, 75 calls? Seriously?” “Good morning, champion!” His friend joked, “About time. How long did you sleep?” “Less than you think.” Kara walked into their conversation, “Go straight to the point, how was the date?” Winn smiled gleefully, scratching the back of his head, “It was..awesome, honestly one of the best dates I’ve had, though the bar is pretty low. But I have to thank you, guys.” He chuckled. “Ah, don’t mention it..Eve told me you went to Big Belly Burger!” “Oh, yes, sorry about that.” “You don’t need to apologize, Winn, it’s great!” “What did you guys talk about all night? I can’t even hold real life conversations for that long.” Mon-El wondered. “Literally anything, it was like a third part to our date. It’s great that we share the same sense of humor, look, we sent each other memes.” Winn picked his phone from his pocket to show the two aliens the funny images: too bad Mon-El looked perplexed and highly confused, “You’ll get it one day, my friend.” Winn said with a pat on his back. “One day I’ll show you all the vines you need to know.” “Aren’t those in India? Or was it Africa? I can’t fly you there like Kara.” Winn covered his disappointed eyes with his palm, “Hey, is Eve a good kisser?” “Really good- She told you?!” “She’s good, from what I remem-“ Mon-El had just learned a new fact about his super girlfriend: apparently, she could throw flames with her gaze without heating up her eyes. “I shouldn’t have said that.” “Anyways..Kara?” Winn interrupted the awkward couple exchange. “Yes?” “Did you tell Alex yet?” “No, I didn—wait, you told him?” “Oops, yes. I forgot to mention it, we were so invested in this date that I completely removed that from my brain..I’m just gonna go to the bathroom before I mess up even more.” Kara bit her lower lip and then looked back at Winn, who despite his past crush for his best friend, was now looking at them with so much love and support, “Not that she needs more confirmations, because you know, Alex Danvers always knows everything, but you should tell her soon.” “Tell me what?” Silent as ever, she walked closer to the three friends. Kara and Mon-El became red as tomatoes, Winn just found the scene really funny, “Whatever it is, it can wait until later: there has been an attack near the fire station.” With a perfect timing, J’onn interrupted the big revelation. “Ahh, I think I’m gonna tell her tonight.” The girl of steel thought. “I guess I’m gonna have to hold my pee for a little longer.” The hero in the making sadly realized.

Kara invited Alex to her place to eat some pizza and watch a movie, and of course, tell her the truth about her and Mon-El: now sitting on the couch, munching her slice, Kara interrupted the silence: “Hey Alex, I wanted to talk to you about something..” “Is everything okay?” “I know that the past weeks have been a wild rollercoaster, for both you and me, and we’ve talked about it on my Earth birthday, but then I told you things weren’t as easy as they seemed..” “Go straight to the point!” “I’m dating Mon-El!” “Oh, thank goodness. Finally!” She let out an exasperated sigh. “And I know about your bet with Winn, he owes you 30 dollars.” “So who else knows? Me, Winn, and?” “Eve. That’s it.” “Wasn’t she going out with Mon-El?” “Now she’s dating Winn.” “Okay, what? When did that happen?” “Well, we set them up this weekend.” “We?” “Me and Mon-El.” “Ahh, right. There’s already an ‘us’, I see.” Kara grinned, she was really happy she didn’t have to hide her relationship to the most important person in her life. “I’m so glad I finally told you.” “It didn’t take a lot to see the chemistry between you two, I’m glad you finally got together! You know I’ve been rooting for you.” “So am I obvious too?” She asked her big sister, referring to when she told her about his confession. “Eh..Sorry. But changing subject, how was it?” “How was what?” “The sex, Kara.” “Alex!!” She covered her face, red as the tomato sauce on the pizza and then she started giggling. “I’m taking that as a good sign.”

6 months and 12 double dates later, the two couples were hanging out at Eve’s place for a game night: “Guys, can I please have your attention?” Winn called Mon-El and Kara “I wanted to tell you something, uhhh, it’s not really that much of a big deal to me because it doesn’t change much—“ “We’re moving in together!” Eve squealed excited, seeing that her boyfriend was now taking too long to reveal it to their friends. “Yes, we found a place that’s pretty close to the DEO and not too far from CatCo, however this little genius right here might have a new job soon..” “You’re leaving CatCo??” Kara seemed to dread her future days at work without her favorite colleague, her eyes went wide. “I sent my curriculum to the DEO.” Now both Mon-El and Kara were shocked and pale, thinking about what it would mean for their superheroes identities. Winn started talking to save the situation: “If you guys didn’t already know, my girl has an impressive brain and a even more incredible resume, even J’onn was impressed. And I know what you’re thinking about—“ “Your secret is safe with me.” Eve took Kara’s hands in hers. “And yours too, Mon-El.” She looked back at who she used to call ‘Mike’.

“He told you.” Kara’s voice was still a bit shaken. “Oh, no, no. I figured it out about a month ago, I only told Winn last week and he just confirmed my suspicions.” “You really are full of surprises.” Mon-El spoke, getting over the initial stupor. “Can I ask how?” “A few months ago, I found myself in the same place as Supergirl and she had just saved something or someone, anyways..I was looking at her hair and I was like ‘Wow, to get those waves you either use a curling iron everyday or you keep your hair braided all the time, like Kara.’ And then I just connected the dots.” “Jeez, I’m starting to believe Alex when she says that glasses aren’t that good of a disguise.” Kara shook her head. “Well, then, if the secret is safe, I really hope the DEO hires you: we would be really lucky to have your brilliant mind in our team.” “Thank you so much, Mon-El. I have my fingers crossed.” “Let’s have a toast, to Eve!” Kara passed the beer bottles to everyone, who echoed her toast. “Cheers!”

Mon-El leaned in to whisper something to Winn: “Hey, are you sure you’re not going a little too fast? Moving in so soon?” “Haven’t you been living with Kara since you started dating, literally?” “Hey! It’s different! I was living at the DEO and it’s not a really comfortable living situation.” “Whatever..I know you’re concerned, but trust me when I say this..She’s different, my life has been different since I met her and I love her, truly. So I have no doubt in my mind.” Mon-El smiled, knowing exactly what he was feeling, “I trust you. For the record, if I’m not your best man next year, I’ll be really offended.” Winn laughed heartily, “Of course, of course.”

Little did Mon-El know that it was exactly what was going to happen in a year. There was no other choice for Winn and Eve than to have him and Kara next to them at the altar; after all, none of that would’ve happened if it wasn’t for their best friends who let them give a second shot at love.

#schottmacher #schottmacher ff #schottmacher fanfic #karamel #karamel ff #karamel fanfiction #karamel fanfic #eve tessmacher #winn schott jr #kara danvers #mike matthews #kara zor-el #mon-el #eve x winn #winn x eve #kara x mon-el #mon-el x kara

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familysides · 6 years

Text

A New Friend Approaches

((Yo yo yo! Spacey here! Big shout out to @sanders-trash-4ever for helping me so much with this! Please head the warnings! This chapter depicts a flash back, and an abusive scene! I won’t be upset if you can’t read it, take care of yourselves!!! Also! Drayke is the dragon witch and the section in the middle that is all italics is the flash back))

Warnings: Child abuse, depictions of child abuse, flash backs, bullying, swearing, yelling, fighting

Words: 1813

Patton did not enjoy school. Now, he wasn’t one to say he ‘hated’ anything, but he was getting pretty close to using the h-word when it came to school. He was a freshmen, which wasn’t too fun, and most people didn’t exactly enjoy his sunny disposition, which was also okay! He didn’t need people to like him, but he would appreciate if they wouldn’t be so mean because of it!

In middle school it had been easier to hide getting picked on. Roman only saw him when he picked him up, but now he saw him everyday in the halls. He knew he could just join his brother and not have to worry about it, but that felt so invasive. Roman didn’t get much of a life outside of him and their younger brothers, so it felt awfully mean to take away his only time free of them.

He almost wished he could be more like Roman. Roman had several friends from the theatre department who had been his friend since middle school! Patton just didn’t have the easiest time making long term friends with people. He did what he could whenever anyone asked, but after that they were done. He couldn’t blame them, he couldn’t exactly hang out much or have people over without stressing Roman out, so he tended to just not. It was easier, everything he did that kept him from home or brought more people home made it more difficult on Ro.

Which is why he hated that he was stuck in mandatory after school tutoring.

Not only did he feel dumb, but it meant Roman had to come back to school after picking up Virgil and Logan, which wasn’t fair to any of them. It usually took Roman until four to come get him, which was fine! He didn’t mind waiting, but since tutoring ended at three-thirty, his bullies had plenty of time to tease and taunt him. Patton could handle that, their words weren’t anything he hadn’t heard before, but sometimes they wouldn’t attack him and that’s when he couldn’t handle it.

“God your just as stupid as your brother,” one of the juniors snapped, “Don’t even know when someone is insulting you.”

Patton tried the best he could, but he couldn’t stop the anger rising in his chest. No one insulted Roman! Roman was an amazing;y smart person who did a lot for everyone he met! He jumped from the bench he was sitting on and glared at the taller boy in front of him, “I don’t care if you’re mean to me, but don’t you dare be mean to my brother you-you witch!”

He could feel his rage growing as his outburst was met with laughter from the older kids around him, before the ring leader raised his hand and Patton was suddenly thrown into the past.

Virgil was standing in front of their dad, tiny fist clenched with Logan right behind him. Patton desperately wanted to run out there, but fear kept his feet rooted in place. He was fighting against everything in him he could, while silently begging for Virgil to just shut up and for Roman to please just get home.

“Logan’s just little leave him alone! You’re just mad ‘cause he’s smarter than you!” Virgil screeched with all the power his small eleven year old body could muster.

Everything froze when their dad started laughing, quietly at first before erupting into a massive roar. Patton rushed forward, feet finally un-frozen, and scooped Logan up as their dad’s eyes were closed. Just as he was about to grab Virgil’s hand, their dad stopped and everything froze again. Only to come alive when Patton felt their dad’s hand on his wrist yanking him forward.

“Did you teach him how to joke? I know you used to like those stupid puns,” their dad mused, before pulling on Patton’s arm again, “Well?”

Patton bit back a whimper, gaze focused on the hand locked around his wrist, “I-I-”

“Spit it out!”

A yelp escaped Patton’s throat as his dad yanked his arm up, causing him to drop Logan, “Sor-sorry! I-I guess I did-”

Another cry escaped his throat as their dad tightened his hold and hoisted him up so he was stuck on his tiptoes and staring him the eyes.

“I don’t want to see any of you for the rest of the night got it? And don’t think I won’t be telling Roman how you couldn’t handle watching your helpless baby brothers for twenty minutes.”

With that, he dropped Patton’s wrist, allowing him to crumple on the floor by his little brothers, before he stormed away towards the living room, not sparing a glance back at his crying son who could only think of the kind man he used to be.

Remy couldn’t believe what he was seeing, a group of kids were surrounding the cute flighty kid from his math class who was laying on the ground and- was he crying?! Oh no, this was not going to be a thing at all. He’d go get a teacher and- Wait. Did Drayke just kick him?! Crushes aside, Remy was not going to let this go on for another second. Besides, teachers were next to useless at this school.

“Hey!” He yelled, adjusting his shades and sauntering forward, “Don’t know if you guys care but there’s a teacher headed this way and frankly y’all look a bit guilty of putting the biggest teacher’s pet on the ground. Don’t think I’d stick around if I were y’all.”

He watched, feigning uninterested as Drayke’s cronies booked it around the side of the school, leaving just him and the asshole who started it all.

“I’m not as stupid as them,” Drayke spit, throwing his thumb back to gesture to his ‘friends,’ “I know the teachers never come over here, not matter what.”

“Next time you might wanna tell that to your buds, ‘cause right now this is reminding me a lot of a highschool cliche,” Remy went on, trying to ignore the boy whimpering by his feet, “Bully gets taken down a peg by the much more handsome protagonist, that’d be me by the way, who then kicks the bullies ass for fun!”

Drayke snorted, rolling his eyes, “You used to be my friend, but now it’s like you think you’re so much better than me.”

“Oh sweetheart, that’s cause I am better than you,” Remy laughed, before booping Drayke on the nose, “Shouldn’t you be lettin’ your ‘crew’ know how you bested me by now?”

A growl rumbled from Drayke’s throat, reminding Remy of a dragon, before he turned around and stalked off, no doubt thinking of how to make this whole encounter seem like he won.

Remy shook his head before turning to see two big brown eyes staring up at him. Shit.

“Oh uh, glad you’re awake.”

Smooth Remy! Now all you have to do is actually shove your foot into your mouth.

“You stopped them,” Remy watched in horror as Patton’s bottom lip began to wobble and fresh tears fell from his eyes, “You helped me.”

“Um, yeah?”Shit, no, don’t make him feel bad like it’s obvious you’d help! “I mean, Drayke’s a real piece of work, and not one you’d find in a museum.”

Patton’s hand shoots up to cover his mouth as he giggles, and Remy can’t help but notice how his entire face lights up at the lame joke.

“Wow,” Patton grins, rubbing at the tears making their way down his face, “You came up with that with ease-el!”

“Was… was that another pun?”

“Uh huh, sorry it was a bit sketchy! I’m not sure I framed it right,” Patton’s smile grew even wider as Remy began to chuckle.

“You just got beaten up, probably forced into a flash back, and here you are making jokes. I can’t even top that,” He went on, crouching down beside the lower-classman, “Honestly, where have you been all my life? I need some sunshine.”

Remy smirked as a blush covered the other boy’s face and he pulled his knees up to his chest, “I mean, if I can make you laugh after you saved me I think it’s the least I can do.”

“Hey, hun, look at me. I look great, so it shouldn’t be hard to for just a second,” Another lame joke, rewarded with a small smile from Patton as he turned his head, “There yah go, now listen. I helped you because I wanted to. I’ve honestly wanted to talk to you for a while, but I never could find a reason that didn’t seem weird, so in reality I should be thanking you for not making me actually have to work up the courage to talk to you.”

“You-I- you wanted to talk to me?!” Patton squeaked, face turning beet red.

God, how much cuter could this dude be?

“Of course! Look at you! You’re nice and funny, and god people are so mean to you and girl let me tell you, you do not deserve it, but you take it anyway. Hell, I’d say I admire you for everything you do and I bet I don’t even know the half of what you go through.”

Now, normally, Remy is pretty good at predicting what’s gonna happen when he talks. He thought that after this little speech Patton may be a little creeped out, but he’d still say thank you and offer him another million dollar smile because he’s a gentleman god dammit, but no. Instead, Remy ends up with this freshman practically tackling him into a hug.

“Hey! Not that I am not loving this, like seriously you give amazing hugs, but take it easy. I don’t want you getting hurt anymore today.”

“Sor-Sorry,” Patton sniffled as he pulled away, causing Remy to wince internally, he didn’t mean to make him cry again! “It’s just been a bit since someone who wasn’t my brothers complimented me. I didn’t realize how much I needed a friend.”

“Well, I hope you don’t mind cause you’re stuck with me now,” Remy vows, throwing an arm around Patton, “Sucks if you do cause I’m like a parasite.”

“Don’t call yourself a parasite! You’re much cuter than a parasite!” Protested Patton, lightly swatting Remy on the arm, much to his amusement.

“Okay, okay, but um,” Remy coughed, nodding his head to the front circle where cars were showing up to pick up their kids, “Do you know that angry guy stalking towards us? Cause if not we may need to book it.”

“Oh! No that’s just Roman! He’s my brother,” Patton grinned, lifting his hand and waving, leaving Remy to wonder in mild horror about how he had managed to get a crush on Roman Sanders’ little brother and not realize it. No way was he gonna survive Sophomore year at this rate.

#tw child abuse #tw flash bakcs #tw swearing #tw fighting #tw yelling #tw bullies #sanders sides #brothers au #roman sanders #patton sanders #Remy Sanders #sleep sanders #story

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byerly-strange · 7 years

Text

Survivors Guilt

Here is a little one-shot I just wrote. It is 1:35 am so I will probably have to come back tomorrow and proofread it but I am gonna post it anyway. Sorry if it is rough. I will also put it on my ao3 which is Nearchild. I will probably post it there tomorrow after I proof read it all.

Will sat, eyes darting back and forth between his friends, everyone’s eyes had changed after the incident with the Upside Down. Dustin’s once curious eyes sees to have had their fill, like they no longer yearned for that same sense of adventure they once did. Lucas’ eyes were strained. Will wouldn’t say they were sad but they looked like they could break at any moment. They reflected the feelings of someone who felt that he had failed as a friend. Mike’s eyes are what hurt Will the most.

Mike used to have eyes like a little puppy dog. Big and brown, full of nothing but love and wonder. Those were the eyes Will sought when his dad called him weak, when Troy called him a fag. Those big brown eyes had always given Will hope that tomorrow could be better, because Mike believed that in his souls, and anyone could see it reflected in his eyes. Now though, his eyes looked sad, broken, beaten down. They looked like the eyes of someone who had lost someone he cared about so many times that he couldn’t count anymore. Will still loved those eyes, those sad brown eyes. He knew he would always love those eyes, something about first loves being everlasting, but Will couldn’t help but feel responsible for breaking the eyes that were full of wonder.

Eleven, the girl that Mike had come to care about, she was gone because of Will. That had to be why Mike’s eyes no longer looked at him with the same sense of wonder and happiness that they once had. Will had killed Mike’s first love, his first kiss, but now she was gone forever because weak William Byers couldn’t take care of himself. Will was surprised Mike’s eyes didn’t show pure contempt for Will, because if someone had taken Mike from him Will would hate them for forever.

“Will?” Mike brushed his shoulder, but he cowered away from the touch. “You okay, you look like you’re over thinking things again.” Mike gave Will a small little smile, he wanted to seem welcoming and humorous, but all Will could see was the broken eyes.

“Yea, I think I am gonna go home. I don’t feel great.” Will averted his attention away from the group and went to gather his stuff and head up stairs to call Jonathon. He didn’t even hear Mike follow him upstairs, but he felt hi grab his arm when he reached for the phone.

“What gives man? I thought you would stay here tonight?” Mike looked hurt, Will hated hurting Mike but he should really be used to it by now.

“I know, I...I just can’t. It...this...” He gestured all around him, “it is all to much for me.”

“Why? We are your friends, if you need to leave I understand but I am tired of you not talking to us about things.”

“I can’t tell you. I will just be hurting you again and I can’t do that, I hate hurting you.”

Mike starred at him a little baffled, surprised by the small boy’s words. “What do you mean again? Will,” He grabbed Will’s face trying to get him to make eye contact, “Will...Will, can you look at me for God’s sake?” Will finally stopped fighting Mike and stared into his eyes, Mike’s beaten down eyes, noticing the extra bags that had developed under them from the last few months of not sleeping.

“I can’t. Jesus Mike, I can’t look at your eyes. It kills me.” He looked back at the ground. Will’s own gaze had seemed to be glued to the floor a lot more since he came back.

“Why?” He couldn’t see Mike’s face, but Will could hear his tone well enough to understand it. Mike’s eyebrows were probably slightly raised, his gazed focused on the top of Will’s bowl cut, his mouth would be turned down, not in a frown but close. Will could see it just perfect, the look of worry, and hurt.

“Because,” Will’s eyes began to burn, they were just watering but Will had cried so much recently that it hurt. “Every single time I look into your eyes all I can see is the sadness I’ve caused. I took away your first love, and first kiss.”

“Will, no yo-”

“Yes, Mike I did. Eleven is dead because I couldn’t take care of myself. I see it every time I look at you. Your eyes which used to just see what was best in this world now look like someone took everything from you. And I can’t stand that it is my fault. I love you so much,” The tears were now streaming down Will’s face forming puddles on his chin, dripping on the floor, as the rivers flowed from his eyes. “I can’t understand why you don’t hate me. How you can’t just scream at me what I scream everyday in the morning. How you can’t tell me that I should’ve died instead of El. I don’t understand because if someone took your from me that’s what I would do.”

“Will...I...I don’t know what to say.”

“You don--”

“Oh never mind, I figured it out.” Mike grabbed Will and pulled him into a hug. “You are such a fucking idiot. Like seriously you are too short to be this dumb.” That made Will giggle but his tears still began to stain Mike’s shirt. “Eleven didn’t die because of you first of all. Eleven died protecting me, Dustin, and Lucas. So you can’t blame yourself for my first kiss leaving me. Next, you can’t blame yourself for my first love leaving me, because they haven’t. They are right in front of me. They have this ridiculous bowl cut that I love, and have the sweetest heart. They are so smart but also so dumb, and they have the most beautiful eyes. Their eyes show pain, love, worry, hate, happiness, and kindness, so so much kindness.” Will was crying even more now he was sure Dustin, Lucas and the whole house could hear him as he bawled into Mike’s shirt.

“Will, no one, and I mean no one, even a tenth as kind as you could ever deserve to die. And next time you think you deserve to die I am gonna tickle you until you stop cause that is such a ridiculous thought it could only be followed by laughter.” Will laughed at this. He began to stop crying and gained enough composure to look up at Mike.

“Thanks Mike.” He wrapped his arms around the much taller boy and squeezed as tight as he could. Reminding himself that Mike was holding him, and was in front of him and for the first time in a long time he felt content. Not happy, but content.

“Any time.” They stood there for a bit before all of Mike’s words hit Will at once.

“Wait did you say you loved me?”

“I-uhhh dont recall?” He gave a smile though that seemed to say the opposite.

“You totally did!” Mike began to blush at the beaming smile Will was giving him.

“Yea, like I love Lucas and Dustin too...” Will’s smile faded a little but he was still happy. Happy that Mike loved him, and happy that Mike looked to his left. Which was where his big brown eyes looked when he lied.

#stranger things #Will Byers #mike wheeler #byeler

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fandammit · 7 years

Text

Bitchin’

[A/N: Oh, you know. Just 2000 words of Nancy hanging out and interacting with Hopper, Mike and Eleven because I love her. Also, she invites El out on a shopping trip because she deserves clothes that weren’t once her dad’s.]

On Ao3

It’s ten minutes until five-thirty when she pulls up to Hopper’s cabin, which means she has roughly fifteen minutes until Mike will even begin to start being persuaded to leave El. She fully intends on just waiting in the car for him because while Hopper’s cabin is cozy and cute for him and El -- especially so after she and Joyce had descended on it last month and helped clean and decorate it -- it’s still small enough to feel crowded when there’s three people in it.

Plus, Mike only gets these Tuesdays after school to spend time alone with El since the rest of the gang all head over on Wednesday and Thursday is just barely controlled chaos at the Byers house. She thinks he deserves that time with her after the year the two of them have had.

But then she sees Hopper standing on the porch, smoking a cigarette and staring off into the woods like he does, and it feels rude to sit in the car like he doesn’t exist, so she grabs the stack of clothes in the seat next to her and gets out of the car.

“Hey, Hopper,” she says, smiling because she’s finally glad that it doesn’t sound weird any more -- leaving the Chief off his name.

(“You don’t work for me and you don’t report to me,” he’d said one day at Thursday night dinner. “Just call me Hopper.”)

“Hey, kid,” he says, nodding at the bundle of clothes in her arms. “What’s that?”

She climbs the steps slowly and holds out the stack of clothes for him to see.

“I was cleaning out my closet and I wanted to see if El wanted any of these.”

He smiles, the expression softening the harsh lines of stress on his face.

“That’s great. I’m sure she’ll love them.” He takes a drag of the cigarette, making sure to blow the smoke away from her. “You can go on in. They’re probably in her room doing multiplication tables, but I make ‘em keep the door open, so nothing to worry about.”

She tilts her head in confusion.

“Why would I be worried?”

He huffs out a laugh.

“Really?”

She squints at him, her brows drawing together in confusion.

“Well, they’re fourteen.” He raises his eyebrow.

“And your point?” He says out loud, though his expression says something different, something about fourteen year old boys alone and behind closed doors with his daughter.

She wants to jump in and defend Mike, say that he’s a good kid -- because he is -- and that he really cares about El -- because it’s obvious to anyone within a five mile radius and working eyes that he does. But then she thinks about the boys that she knew at fourteen, and then thinks a little bit longer about the fact that she really doesn’t want to think about her brother also being a fourteen year old boy.

So she points out something that’s equally as true.

“My point is that El could throw him across the room without even laying a hand on him if he ever tried anything that she didn’t want.”

He blinks at her and then lets out a small chuckle.

“Touche, kid, touche.”

She smiles, satisfied, before resting against the railing next to him.

“I’ll go inside in a few minutes. Jonathan picked up an extra shift, so I’m here a little earlier than usual.”

Hopper frowns.

“Again? That’s the third one in a week.”

She sighs.

“His car needs repairs -- again, I know -- so he needs the extra money.”

Hopper tilts his head at her, a look of confusion on his face.

“Joyce didn’t mention it.”

She looks away. Crap. She forgot that he hadn’t told his mom.

“Oh, well, um, it just happened a few days ago.”

Hopper raises an eyebrow at her.

“And I have lunch with Joyce basically every weekday. It seems like something she would mention.”

Now it’s Nancy’s turn to raise an eyebrow. Lunch everyday, huh? She tucks that bit of information away before clearing her throat and turning towards Hopper.

“Oh, well, he hasn’t exactly told his mom.”

Hopper takes a drag of his cigarette and shakes his head as he blows out the smoke.

“He hasn’t exactly meaning he hasn’t at all?”

She huffs out a laugh.

“Yeah, but -.” She glances over at him and then shrugs. “He just doesn’t want her to worry.”

Hopper sighs as he puts out his cigarette.

“Christ, that kid just needs a new car,” he says, shaking his head.

“Hence the extra shifts,” she replies with a wry smile.

He makes a humming sound in the back of his throat, a contemplative look on his face, before he motions towards the door.

She picks up the stack of clothes, following him into the house just in time to hear Mike say, “Quiet please! El is about to start a practice test.”

She sits down at the table, amused as Mike starts a stopwatch and El begins running her pencil furiously over what looks to be a serious of multiplication problems. She glances over at Hopper and sees how closely he’s staring at El, muttering encouraging phrases that are too quiet to be heard. She looks over at Mike and sees almost the exact same expression on his face, and it’s frankly so adorable that she wishes desperately that she had Jonathan’s camera with her to capture the moment.

About two minutes later, El puts down her pencil.

“Done,” she says with a triumphant grin, pushing the paper towards Mike. He grabs a pen from next to him on the floor, checking off each problem quickly before looking up at her with a wide grin.

“100% El! You’ve officially learned your multiplication tables!”

He makes a move like he’s about to reach out and hug her, then glances over to where Nancy and Hopper are sitting and quickly shifts it into an awkward pat on her shoulder instead.

El, on the other hand, seems to completely disregard both her and Hopper, and leans forward to kiss Mike on the lips before grabbing the paper and jumping up from where they’re both seated on the floor.

Hopper makes a sound deep in his throat, but doesn’t say anything. And honestly, given the look on Mike’s face right now as his eyes dart between El and Hopper, it doesn’t seem like he really needs to.

She bounds over to where Hopper’s standing and shows him the paper.

“100 percent!” She says, practically bouncing on her toes, a wide grin lit across her face as she reaches out and wraps her arms around him.

He smiles down at her, wrapping his arm around her as he drops a kiss in her curly mass of hair.

“Nice job, kid, I knew you could do it.” He gestures over to Nancy. “Nancy’s got something you might like -- why don’t you take a look while Mike cleans up.” He pushes El towards her bedroom, gesturing for Nancy to follow her.

El settles on her bed, looking at at Nancy with curious expression her eyes.

Nancy sits down next to her and pushes the stack of clothes onto her lap.

“I was going through my closet and I wanted to see if you wanted any of these.”

El stares at the clothes, her fingertips gently brushing over the folds of fabric.

“Pretty,” she says quietly, turning her head up to look at Nancy with something that resembles awe. “For me?”

Nancy smiles.

“Yeah, it’s for you. I mean, whatever you want.” She casts a critical eye at the clothes. “And you don’t have to take them all - just whatever you actually like. It won’t hurt my feelings or anything.”

El looks at her, uncertain, but Nancy just smiles at her in a reassuring way, trying to encourage her to look through the stack.

She unfolds each piece of clothing one by one, running her hands over the fabric, turning it this way and that before she sets them down. Slowly, she splits the clothes into two different piles. The one closest to her -- the one Nancy assumes she wants to keep -- is filled with cooler, more dulled tones, maroons and mustards and faded pinks. She takes a jean jacket that Nancy bought once on a whim and never wore, a tartan skirt that never really seemed to fit her style. She notices that El shies away from anything too bright or too loud, and wonders if a lifetime of trying not to be noticed has somehow bled over into her fashion choices, too.

When she’s done, she hugs the new stack of clothes to her chest and smiles at Nancy, a little shy at the edges, but a real smile nonetheless.

“Thank you,” she says, a little bit of that awed look sneaking back into her eyes.

Nancy smiles.

“You’re welcome, El.” She pauses, and realizes that she’s never outright spoken her name aloud to her face for all that she’s thought it in her head. Mike and the boys still call her El, while Hopper and Joyce have taken to calling her Jane. She doesn’t really belong in either group -- just hears Mike call her El enough to go along with it. She tilts her head in the other girl’s direction. “El or Jane? Which one do you want me to call you?”

El stares at her for a long, intense moment, and Nancy can see her considering the question carefully.

“El,” she finally says, her tone resolute as she glances between Nancy and Mike.

Nancy nods before getting up off the bed, taking the discarded pile of clothes with her.

“See you at Thursday night dinner?”

El nods, her arms still wrapped around the newly acquired clothes. She’s wearing an oversized men’s flannel that can only once have belonged to Hopper over a small grey shirt that she feels like must’ve once belonged to Will. Nancy frowns, and glances over at the open door of El’s closet -- sees one dress hanging amidst a jumbled mishmash of men and boy’s clothing.

She furrows her brow as she leaves the room, chewing on her lip as an idea comes to her.

She glances over to where Hopper is cutting vegetables for tonight’s dinner, then walks over to where Mike’s waiting by the door, his backpack slung over one shoulder.

“Hey, go ahead to the car, I’m gonna ask Hopper something.”

Mike squints at her, his placid expression melting into look of deep suspicion.

“About what? Why? What are you going to ask him?”

She rolls her eyes and pushes him towards the door.

“Nothing about you, I wanna ask something about El.”

It’s apparently the exact wrong thing to say, because Mike’s frown just deepens even further and he actually plants his feet and crosses his arms as he turns to face her.

“What about El?”

She lets out a heavy sigh and puts her hands on both his shoulders.

“I’m going to ask him if I can take El out to get some new clothes this weekend because she deserves to have her own clothes, not just hand me downs from me and Hopper.” She shakes her head just as he opens his mouth. “And no, you can’t come, because she’ll need to try on clothes and it might be awkward if you’re there and I want her to get things she wants and that she thinks look good, not things she thinks you want.”

She keeps her hands on his shoulders until he relaxes, his arms hanging loosely at his side as he nods.

“You know you don’t have to protect her all the time, right? She can take care of herself.”

He looks abashed at that, scuffs his foot against the floor.

“Yeah, I know - I just - I don’t know.” He blows out a puff of air, glancing helplessly at the door like it’ll have an answer.

“Hey, I get it,” she says, because she does. There are times when she wants nothing more than just to wrap her arms around El, who has those wide brown eyes that have seen too much, that tattoo on her wrist that means she’s suffered more than her fair share. And she doesn’t even have half of Mike’s experience with her.

Still though -- she knows the frustration of not being taken at your worth, the resentment that can build at the feeling of being smothered. She doesn’t want that for her brother or El.

She squeezes his arm. “It’s not just you and El against the world any more, you know? You have people on your side -- both of you.” She tips her head down to meet his eyes. “You know that, right?”

It’s not a rhetorical question, though she wishes it could be. She knows she hadn’t been there for him in the last year, just when he’d needed her the most. She’d promised him no more secrets, then let them both retreat into each of theirs for a whole year.

She wants to make sure she doesn’t make that same mistake again.

“Mike?” She asks, brushing away that long thatch of hair that’s forever getting in his eyes.

He finally meets her gaze and nods, gives her a smile that’s as awkward as it is genuine.

“Yeah, I know, Nancy.” He runs his hand through his hair. “Ok, I’ll meet you in the car.”

He looks past her shoulder one more time, back into El’s bedroom, before turning and heading out the door.

She turns to where Hopper is standing, walks over slowly and clears her throat.

He glances over at her but keeps cutting the carrot.

“Everything ok with you two?”

She nods, then realizes he can’t see her.

“Yeah, we’re fine. Just sibling stuff.” She looks over to El’s bedroom, sees the younger girl trying on her old a grey and blue sweater with light pair of jeans and smiles. “I was wondering -- and I know that we still have to be really careful -- but I was thinking that it’d be nice to go out and get El some clothes of her own.”

Hopper stops cutting and sets down the knife, an indiscernible look on his face. It doesn’t seem like an outright no at least, so she continues. “All she has are these hand me down clothes from you and Will and now me, and, I don’t know, I think it’d good to get something just for her, you know? Something that she really wants to get. Something - something unique, distinct.”

“Bitchin’,” she hears El say behind her, a touch of amusement in the words. She sees the corner of Hopper’s mouth twitch, like he wants to smile but is trying not to, looks over at El to see a similar expression on her face.

“Yeah, um, bitchin’,” she says, her own mouth turning up at the word. She looks over at Hopper.

“I could take on a Saturday, somewhere far out of town, like Columbus or Bloomington. I mean, those are big enough cities that no one’s gonna notice two girls out for a shopping trip. We could leave early and be back by mid-afternoon, and I’d make sure that -- .”

“That’s fine with me,” Hopper says, interrupting her. He leans back against the counter and flicks his gaze between her and El. “I think it’s a good idea.”

She blinks rapidly. She actually expected more of a discussion, but when she looks around and sees how El is beaming at Hopper, the way her entire body is lit up with excitement, she understands why it was so easy.

Nancy grins up at him.

“Perfect! We’ll talk details at Thursday night dinner.”

He rolls his eyes.

“If we can somehow manage to be heard over the chaos at the dinner table, sure.”

Nancy laughs, and turns around to find herself facing El. The younger girl hesitates for a moment before wrapping her arms around Nancy.

“Thank you, Nancy,” she says quietly, squeezing her once before stepping back with an awkward look on her face.

Nancy smiles.

“Get ready to pick out some bitchin’ outfits, El.”

#Nancy Wheeler #Jim Hopper #eleven #Mike Wheeler #Stranger Things #Stranger Things Fic #my fic #if you're about the nancy hate then i'm not about you #this season ROBBED US of wheeler sibling interactions and also just positive female interactions and i'm mad about

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4deveryoung · 7 years

Text

This is My Rape Testimony

Ever wonder why victims of rape don’t go forward with pressing charges? Well I had always wondered this, until it happened to me. It was a hot and muggy August day. I woke up excited because I was getting my hair done, and for all you girls out there, you know how exciting this is. I also had my last workout of the summer at the gym I had been going to. I went to the hair salon and spent probably a good 2 hours there. I had been texting one of my close friends the whole time, who had just started her new job in the city. It was a Wednesday. She was going out after work for sips at the uptown beer garden, and I had made plans to go down to the city and meet her after I got my hair done. It was around 5 o’clock when my hair was finished, and my mom came to pick me up. I felt pretty and decided I definitely had to go out because I had just gotten my hair done. I asked my mom to drop me off at the 69th street terminal so that I could take the El right into the city to meet M. Of course my mom drops me off and says “Remember, text me when you get there, who you are with, when you are coming home, and how AND don’t drink too much!” I replied back just by saying yea ok mom I won’t forget! I get on the EL and head down to the city. It was around 6:30 when I got there—still light out. The uptown beer garden was packed, but it did not take me long to find M. M, her friend C and I started drinking, and we thought “hey let’s just start chugging our drinks, and ordering 3 at a time” And that is what we did. We were having ourselves a ball. Eventually we decided to go back to a hotel right across from city hall, where M’s work friends were staying. We started to drink again when we were there and around 9 o’clock we were deciding to go to a bar close by. This is where everything turns black. There’s a part of time where I just don’t remember up until I realized I was lost from my friends in the city by myself. I was texting and calling to find them, but just couldn’t make sense of anything, and neither could they, but I was determined to explore around the city until I found them. I am very familiar with the city and have been in this situation before so I didn’t really think anything of it. I’m a very outgoing and talkative person if I do say so myself. Usually this isn’t a problem, but August 17, 2016, my friendliness got me into a bit of trouble. A man approached me, probably in his mid-40’s or 50’s. He was wearing a Phillies hat. A black man probably the same height as me. He had facial hair. We started talking and he was being very friendly so I just told him that I was looking for some friends. Then things started to get a bit weird. I will spare most of the details for you, but he eventually led me down an alley where he then forced his penis into my vagina. I was raped. Luckily I was eventually able to get away and by the Grace of God there was an uber 1 minute away that I was able to get in right away at the place where I ran to. My head was spinning. I was confused. I was in denial. I had no idea what to do. I ended up ubering to my friend B’s house. I probably got there around midnight. I cried and cried and cried to her. She hugged me and just let me cry. Eventually, she drove me home where I went right to sleep, hoping I would wake up and it would all just be some crazy nightmare. I woke up the next morning, wearing exactly what I was wearing the day before. My mom was downstairs in the kitchen making breakfast, and I walked downstairs and just started bawling my eyes out, apologizing to my mom when I saw her. I told her what had happened and she just hugged me and cried with me. Eventually I calmed down and I told her that I didn’t want any police involvement and I didn’t want to go to the hospital. Long story short, we decided that was what I had to do. I spent half of August 18th in the hospital, and the other half, in the SVU department of Philadelphia speaking with detectives. Telling every little detail that I could remember of what had happened, close to 10 times. It was by far one of the hardest, most exhausting days of my life. Flash forward a month or so, I get another call from the detective. They had found someone matching the description I gave 6 times that night on camera. They needed me to come into the SVU again and look at a photo array. This is a lineup of 6 photos they showed me, in which I were to identify if any of them were the man who had assaulted me. I ended up identifying him, which made it possible for them to get a warrant for his arrest. Now after this, I just waited and waited to hear from them. One day I decided to call and ask for an update on my case. The Detective said that she was actually just about to call me because they had to bring me in for more questioning. Probably the last thing I needed at that time. I went back in for more questioning and waited and waited. I ended up forgetting about all of it for a little. Besides the nightmares and flashbacks I was able to convince myself that I am ok. I had been wondering when I would get an update, and if they had even done anything. I really had no idea what was going on. Eventually in the beginning of February, 2017 I received a call saying that they had arrested the man. I felt an immediate sense of relief, but the more I thought about it, I realized this meant I had to face him in court. The day came where I received my witness subpoena in the mail. The court date was set for February 23, 2017, a day I will never forget. We got there at 10:30 and waited until my case was called around 2 to go into the courtroom. I saw many girls there for the same reason as I was. Everyone had tear filled eyes, but there was still a strong sense of bravery radiating off of every girl sharing their testimonies. Facing this man in the court room, and having to be re victimized was sickening. Testifying was the hardest and worst thing I ever had to do in my life by far. This is the reason why girls don’t end up pressing charges and testifying. It all comes down to he said she said. And that is exactly what happened. The judge discharged the case for burden of proof that I did not consent. I did all of this for nothing. Had to face this man again, had to feel him staring at me as I was up on the stand, had to be cross examined and almost forced to believe that it was my fault this happened, all for nothing. The criminal justice system had failed me. How do I feel most days? I feel dirty, worthless, alone, confused, overwhelmed, damaged, unlovable, scared, stupid. Did I deserve this? I know that God didn’t make this happen to me, but why me? Why anyone? Why are people like this? Why are there bad people? Where is God? When will I forget? Will I forget? I know I am doing the right thing by reporting it but why is the right thing so hard to do? These questions, plus hundreds more constantly cross my mind. Some days I wake up and have to call my mom to ask if something bad happened to me because it doesn’t seem real. Nightmares and flashbacks have become a part of my life. I smile and act goofy on the outside, but inside by body is quivering in fear and broken heartedness. This attack is now a part of my life. I know that it is not who I am and I am not defined by this but I am a victim of rape. I have been trying to run from it and pretend like it never happened the past few months, numbing myself to life, but the reality is that it did happen. And I think that is what my recovery depends on. Realizing that it did happen, and facing it. This chapter must be in my story book for some reason, and one day I hope that God shines his light upon its purpose, or the road leading me to help others in similar situations in the future. I think that another important step I need to make towards my recovery, is facing Jesus and inviting him back into my life. When I am feeling the weight of evil, remembering that He promised us good. He will help me to fear no evil, and he will walk with me through this storm. There is a Bible verse that I have been thinking of a lot recently, and that is “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you. For I will be with you” (Isaiah 43:2). Just a reminder that no matter what struggle you are going through, whether it is something small, something large, or something in between, God is with us always. He will help us get through these deep waters. He will help us to be brave and do hard things every day of our lives. He promised us good, and he will make sure good is what we get. Easier said than done, and trust me, it has been extremely difficult for me, but all we have to do is open our hearts to him and ask. I still question myself everyday wondering if I had said or done something differently would any of this have happened? Would my case have been discharged and all of the charges dropped? But in the end I have to remind myself that I did all that I could. I was as brave as I could have ever been, and I told the truth. At least I know the truth and I want the rest of the world to know the truth and how the criminal justice system has failed me, along with so many other girls.

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