#also not posting between the hours of 4-7am for once that is a win for me !!

[changbunnies]

All About You (18+)

♡ Pairing: Royal Knight/Bodyguard!Minho x Princess!Reader

♡ Genre: age gap, royal au, historical au, arranged marriage au (reader only), angst, kind of forbidden love? (maybe more than kind of), basically porn with plot

♡ Word Count: 7.5k

♡ Summary: You, the princess who ran away from the castle after finding out your father, the king, has finalized your arranged marriage. Minho, your royal knight and glorified bodyguard, tasked with bringing you back home at all costs. When found, you hit Minho with a very interesting proposition- for him to be the one you share all your "firsts" with, instead of your inevitable husband.

♡ Warnings: age gap !! reader is ~23 while minho is in his 40s, please don't read if this makes you uncomfortable!, uneven power dynamics, outdated traditions and views on women to suit the setting, brief reference to death by guillotine and death in general, mentions of injury and swordfighting

♡ Smut Warnings (contains spoilers): lowkey corruption kink, loss of virginity (reader), pet names (princess (mostly as a title), good girl), slight sub + dom dynamics, soft dom minho, a lot of kissing (should be expected from me atp), nipple play, oral (f receiving), fingering (f receiving), slight overstim, unprotected piv, multiple orgasms, creampie

♡ Notes: at this point i am determined to write a royal au fic for every member, and my newest offering to you is minho <3 i was literally possessed writing this like once the idea hit my brain i had to get it out asap

♡ Disclaimer: please read responsibly, and remember that this work is fiction and meant strictly for imaginative fun. the idols used in fics are more accurately faceclaims and personality outlines for imaginary characters, and should not be interpreted as factual representations of existing people.

Fuck. Minho was absolutely fucked.

In recent years, he had one job, and one job only, and that was to take care of the princess. Make sure she’s safe, escort her to where she needs to be and watch over her at all times– that’s all. Not always an easy job, but one of vital importance that Minho took with utmost seriousness. In the 3 years it’s been since becoming your royal knight and glorified bodyguard, he never messed up this critically. 

You always had a rebellious streak and challenged authority, everyone in the castle knew that. And part of Minho’s job, apart from keeping you safe, was keeping you in check– and the king made it extremely clear that failing to do so was not an option.

He lost track of the amount of times he uttered the words “Princess, please think rationally,” or “please consider your responsibility to the kingdom, don’t do this,” in a near desperate attempt to get you to listen to reason. 

And today, he fucked up the worst he ever had. He knew you were upset tonight, but he was under the impression he successfully calmed you down, and that you wouldn’t do anything rash. He turned his back to you, thinking the storm had been quelled, and that you’d listen to your father, even if doing so felt like pulling teeth. He underestimated however, just how deep your sadness and anger truly ran, and the very moment you saw an opening, you took it. 

You fled from the castle with blind determination, nowhere to go and with little of value in your hands, fueled purely by the desire to escape your unfair circumstances, and live your own life by your own means. You may not believe it, but Minho understood, and felt for you– he really did. But that didn’t change what his duty was, and even if it made you hate him, he had to do his job to the best of his ability. 

So now here he was, roaming the streets looking for you, the hours passing in a blur. You must’ve done a good job of concealing your identity, because no one he asked had seen a young woman matching the princess' description. And as the minutes ticked by, and sunset turned to midnight, he was at a complete loss of what to do.

He made record time combing the entire bustling town, stopping into places full to the brim with people in the hopes he’d catch a glimpse of you in the crowd, and yet there seemed to be no trace of you anywhere. It was easy for someone to hide their presence in a crowd, or in the rowdy environment of a tavern, and you were more than intelligent enough to blend into a crowd and divert attention away from yourself.

It was entirely possible that Minho had seen you at some point, and simply didn’t realize it, though he liked to believe he’d recognize you anywhere, no matter what you wore. Minho scowled, clenching his teeth as he scanned the dark horizon of the treeline; should he check the outer walls of the town for a clue, or double back and check the streets again?

He doubts you made it out of the town easily, considering you likely had no money on your person and little experience with the realities of the world. You were intelligent, yes, but sheltered; he could easily imagine you quickly getting in over your head, thinking you could make it to the next town without issue, only to end up lost and in need of help, with no one for miles to hear your desperate cries. 

Fuck. If he couldn’t find you, his head would most certainly be meeting the cold steel of a guillotine. He had no family who would mourn his loss, but still, he wasn’t ready to face his mortality. And the king, despite being someone he could call a close friend, would spare no mercy if he failed to keep his one and only daughter safe.

But really, there was more to it than just the threat of death that kept him searching for you. Believe it or not, he genuinely wanted you safe and well, and he'd do anything to ensure you made it back home, even if it made you curse him for the rest of his days. 

As if God himself heard his prayers and decided to grant him a miracle, Minho sees you– there, on the outskirts of town, holding your cold hands up to your face and letting your breath warm them. It’s dark, the street barely even illuminated enough to discern your recognizable features, but he knows without a doubt that it's you standing there in the cold street, because truly, he knows you anywhere. 

By the time you realize you’ve been spotted and recognized, it’s already much too late to flee. Minho approached you with utmost haste, reaching out and grabbing your arm, lest you make the foolish decision to try to escape again. His hold, while not rough enough to hurt you, is firm, and it only takes one attempt at pulling your arm from his hold to know this is it; your escape attempt has failed, and you’ll be dragged back to the castle and reprimanded for your “temper tantrum.” 

Your father never listens to you, no matter how hard you try to make him understand and see your point of view. Maybe if you were born a boy, your opinions would be important to him, and he’d see you are more than an object to pawn off to whatever man gave him the most political power.

“Princess–” “I’m not going home,” you interject before he even has a chance, though you already know it’s in vain. There is no avoiding returning to your glorified prison now that Sir Minho has you in his grasp. 

He sighs, but his face changes to one of sympathy, his grip on your arm loosening ever so slightly. “Can we at least go to an inn room? It’s not safe for a young lady to be on the streets at night,” he reasons with you, as gently as he can manage.

Normally Minho is quite stern with you, but you get the impression that he feels being stern isn’t the right approach tonight. You’re known for expressing yourself very vocally, even when doing so is extremely ill-advised, and he is well aware of how opinionated and fiery you are. 

But treating this display as anything other than a genuine act of desperation, a culmination of years of perceived disrespect and conformity, would be another critical error– one he can’t afford to make. So he will be firm, yes, but gentle in his approach.

You frown as you look at him; you’re stubborn by nature, and part of you wants to fight against him until the bitter end, but he’s not wrong about the streets being unsafe for you at night. You know he won’t let you escape again come morning, but that’ll have to be a problem for later; for right now, you really should heed his advice and go to an inn for the night. 

“Fine,” you concede, much to Minho’s relief. He could’ve forced you to go with him if he really needed to, but he’d rather avoid doing something so unpleasant. He leads you to a nearby tavern, which is still bustling with activity even at the late hour.

He keeps you close as he pushes through the crowd of rowdy drunks to the dual innkeep-bartender, hoping that there is still a room available. The man departs, coming back with a key dangling in hand, “You’re in luck. Last room’s all yours.” 

Minho thanks the man and pulls out his satchel to pay him, leaving a few extra coins as a tip before stashing it back in his pocket, along with the key he was given, and the two of you go up the stairs together.

“There’s only one bed,” you comment as you step inside the room, though Minho doesn’t seem to care much about that fact. “That’s fine, don’t plan on sleeping anyways,” he says as he removes his leather scabbard from his back, resting it against the back of the chair in the corner of the room. 

You frown as you sit on the bed and watch him; he must’ve been in a hurry when he received word you fled from the castle, as he wasn’t wearing any of his armor, strictly in casual wear you’d very rarely seen him in. Probably for the best, you think, because if anyone saw a royal knight desperately searching the streets, multiple alarms would be raised.

He lights the fireplace, hoping to quickly spread some heat throughout the cold room, before he sits in the chair, crossing his arms and watching you carefully. Deserved, you suppose. How is he supposed to trust you’re not going to flee at the first available moment just as before?

You certainly don’t make his job easy for him; he can’t take his eyes off you for a second. The silence between you lingers for some time, the crackling of the fire the only sound either of you hear, apart from the muffled patrons enjoying their drinks downstairs. Minho, despite his relaxed posture, looks like he’d be ready to jump up at a moment's notice should he need to. 

You sigh; should you just try to sleep? It’d feel awkward and uncomfortable to try to fall asleep with someone's eyes boring holes into you, but you really didn’t give him much of a choice. “Do you want to tell me why you ran away from the castle?” Minho asks suddenly, breaking the tempered silence between you. “You already know the answer to that,” you respond, crossing your own arms now. 

“Is marrying Sir Jin really so bad?” he asks, and you scoff, rolling your eyes. “Yes, obviously. I don’t want to. Not that you or my father care about me or anything I think.”

Minho’s brow furrows, the frown on his face growing. “Princess, you know that’s not true. I do care about you.”

“Do you? I haven’t been able to tell in the slightest,” you counter a bit harshly, “and you could help me if you wanted to, you know. I’d be fine out there if I was with you.”

Okay, maybe you’re not being fair to Minho right now. You do know he cares, but realistically, what is he supposed to do? If he disobeyed your fathers orders, he’d be lucky if his only punishment was a swift death.

He was assigned to you because your father trusts him to do the right thing and follow orders dutifully, a trust that is usually not misplaced. But he has to admit, the more and more time he spends with you, the more he feels for you. 

Minho never knew your father, the king, to be an unreasonable or cruel man, but in your eyes, he might as well be the devil himself. And maybe he is cruel– because how do you strip someone of their freedom and choices for your own gain, and not see the harm it causes, the wrong in it?

You are more than a pawn, more than a subject, more than his daughter– you are a person. A person with thoughts, feelings, and opinions as real as any mans, who did not deserve to be treated lesser than for the simple crime of being born a girl. 

But what is Minho if not an upholder of the status quo? He was just a single man, and even if he recognized how unfairly you were treated in comparison to the golden child that was your elder brother, what was he supposed to do? He always performed his tasks dutifully and without question, and it wasn’t until he met you that he began to struggle with what he should do, and what he wants to do.

And maybe he could get you out of this town, help you live a quiet, modest life somewhere new, away from the watchful eye of your father. Where he could be your protector, same as now, but without the guilt, burden, or threats.

You know you shouldn’t take your frustrations about your life out on Minho, but he’s really all you have. You trust him with your life, and he’s shown you multiple times that he cares about you beyond the duty he has to you, or to your father. He's your only confidant, the only person in the world you can rely on. 

Your eyes linger on the scar across his nose– he got it protecting you, the other man’s sword barely missing his eyes and cutting just across his face, and it was only one of many scars he obtained in his service to you. He’d pick you up and run with you in his arms when you were injured, he’d fight off attackers without breaking a sweat, sustain injury after injury all to make sure you were safe.

You’d watch his back, always stunned and mesmerized at the ease at which he cut down your enemies, as if they were nothing but paper. When he’d turn back to you, breathing heavy and sweat only just starting to trickle on his brow, his eyes would turn from the harshest winter chill to the gentle warmth of a spring morning.

He was quiet, stern, but his care ran far deeper than one would think just by looking at him, and all you had to do to see the true depth of his feelings was look in his eyes. So you knew it was unfair to accuse him of not caring about you, to expect him to go above and beyond for you, to ask that he go against your father to give you what you want. But you were just so sad, frustrated, angry, that you couldn’t stop yourself.

“Maybe you’ll grow to love him if you give him a chance,” Minho suggests; you both know that’s never going to happen, but what else can he say? He never married, and had no children, dedicated to his duty as he was; he had no real advice to offer someone when it came to love, romance, and the like, but he imagined it wasn’t impossible to fall in love if you just met Sir Jin with an open mind.

But as stated, that’s never going to happen. You’re stubborn to a fault, and once you’ve decided something, there’s no changing it. The best Minho can ever manage to do is get you to reconsider, but even then, you’re still likely to go about things the way you originally wanted to, with no regard for consequences or keeping up appearances. You’re a fiery woman, there was no doubt about it, and you don’t let go of things easily. 

“The mere thought of giving that man all my firsts makes me sick, it’s vile,” you scrunch up your nose, making your distaste for the man very clear. Minho doesn’t even think you’ve actually met the man yet, but you’ve already decided you hate him– you don’t want to marry him, and so you’ll be firmly stuck in your opinion, no matter what anyone says. 

“Maybe this isn’t advice I should be giving you, but.. You don’t necessarily have to. To give him your firsts, or love him. Find someone you do love, even if you have to keep it a secret, and hold him with all you’ve got. It still wouldn’t be ideal, of course, but.. Well, it’d be something, at least.” Really, Minho is supposed to encourage you to be an obedient daughter and listen to your father without question, but he knows you well enough to know that’s a fool's errand. 

You’re never going to listen, never going to be obedient, never going to stop being opinionated. So what’s the next, most realistic piece of advice he can give? Lie, of course. Make your father and inevitable husband believe you’re a good, obedient wife and daughter, and then go live the life you really want behind their backs.

It's dishonest as all hell, and there would be consequences if you got caught, but if you’re going to be miserable no matter what you do, you might as well try, right? It’s what Minho thinks he would do if he were you, anyways. 

“What about you?” you ask and Minho raises a brow in question. “What about me?” he asks, and what you respond with makes him feel like the air has been punched out of his lungs. “What if I gave my firsts to you?”

Did he hear you right? There must be some mistake with his ears, there’s absolutely no way you said what he thinks you did. “You– what?” Surely you can’t be serious about this. You’re the princess, and he’s just the man who happens to be your guard; a man who is your fathers age at that.��But the way you look at him, he can tell you’re not joking in the slightest.

“Princess, I couldn’t possibly accept that,” Minho says sternly, his arms no longer crossed but instead resting on the arms of the chair, hands beginning to grip tightly so he can ground himself and try to make sense of this insane situation.

“Why not? I’d be happier if I gave it to someone like you. I trust you,” you say so nonchalantly it makes his head reel. What the fuck is happening right now? 

And truly, Minho was the ideal man; at least in your opinion. He was handsome, mature, realistic and practical, knew how to reel you in without disregarding the root of what you feel or being disrespectful to you.

He never dismissed how you felt, made you feel over emotional or like a fool who overreacts; he’d ask you to see reason, sure, urge you to think more before acting, but he never, never made you feel like your feelings were invalid. And he genuinely cared about you, and you liked him, were attracted to him, so if the opportunity presented itself then.. Why not take the chance? 

Fuck. Minho was absolutely fucked.

You were just freshly 20 when Minho first met you and became your guard, and hard as he tried to never see you beyond the platonic, he’s always viewed you as an attractive young woman. He liked your fiery spirit, liked how you had the bravery and gall to challenge authority, a skill that in recent months he felt he was sorely lacking. Your attitude was refreshing, and despite your circumstances, you never acted like a damsel in need of his help. 

In a different life, in another world, maybe you two could have met as equals, not painfully stuck to the rules of an unfair, unforgiving reality. You’d be each other's foil; you, the impassioned dreamer with as many thoughts and ideas as there were stars in the sky, and he the realist, who didn’t dim your light but tempered it into a steady, sustainable flame.

You’d take him out on adventures, out of the strict box of his comfort zone, and he’d ground you more firmly to reality, never discouraging your dreams but making sure you took the necessary steps in the right way, responsibly. You'd match one another perfectly, complementary and meant for each other. 

But that’s not your reality, and you both know it. There would never be any coming back from this if you go through with it, and there’s no ideal, happy future for you two to share. “I’m not so disillusioned to think this would be anything other than sex for you,” you continue, and he swallows, mind still racing impossibly, “but it’d be much more meaningful for me with you than some bastard I don’t like in the slightest.” 

You’re wrong. So wrong, and you don’t even know it. It would never be “just sex” with you. You mean much, much more to him than you even realize. “You won’t regret asking a man like me? There’d be no taking it back once it’s done,” Minho can’t help but ask, rationality and reason desperately trying to gain control. 

Despite what your father may believe, you’re a grown woman capable of making your own decisions. And this is a decision you make with full knowledge of what it means for you, more than willing to accept whatever consequences may arise for committing such a sin.

In an ideal world, you’d be allowed to love who you wish, live where you wish, do what you wish. But this isn’t an ideal world, and if there is only one thing you can ever be granted in this life that feels as if it isn’t even your own, it would be this– to have one night, just one night, where you can be the person you want to be, with Minho by your side.

“You’re free to reject me if you’re not attracted to me, but.. My only regret would have been not trying. So I ask, are you not attracted to me?” He looks you over carefully following your question, grip on the armrests tightening.

Admitting that he’s attracted to you may as well be a death sentence. But he can’t lie to you, completely at your mercy. Fuck the king, it’s you he’s really loyal to. All he’s ever done, all he ever will do, it’s always for you. He’s always tried to act in your best interest, to do the right thing, to keep you safe and protected. But does keeping you safe even matter if you’re miserable? 

“I am,” Minho swallows, answering honestly despite his better judgment, “You have no idea how attracted to you I am.”

“So why hesitate?” you ask, fingers trail down your lap, over your knees, to where the very bottom of your dress lies. He watches you, eyes darting from your hands back to your face. You’re watching him too, carefully, considering his every reaction before you make your next move, impressively calculated. 

You take the hem of your dress in your hands, pulling it up leisurely, getting it halfway up your thighs before Minho rises from his chair. He's is in front of you in an instant, his hands grabbing your wrists and stopping you from lifting it any further.

“You’re playing a dangerous game, Princess,” he breathes, voice low and strained; he can’t lose control of his desires, but fuck, you’re making it so hard. You look up at him, meeting his gaze with the same fiery determination you always have, but there’s more there than just that this time. Desire, want, need– all for him.

Fuck it. He’s going to get burned, but maybe it’s worth it. You’ll be his funeral pyre, engulfing him in your flame until all that remains are the ashes of the man he was supposed to be. And what a beautiful way to end his life it will be, lost between your thighs, feeling your nails dig and claw at his skin.

He lets go of your wrists, one of his hands coming to cup your face, thumb tracing over your bottom lip. “Has anyone ever kissed you, Princess?” he asks and you give a slight shake of the head, breathing a soft “No..”

He hums, and there’s a twisted sort of pleasure he derives from knowing he’ll be your first in every conceivable way. You’re not “innocent,” he knows you’re not, but there’s something about being your first kiss, your first cock, your first everything that makes him crazy. 

“And you want me to be the first one to kiss you?” he follows up with another question, corners of his mouth threatening to twist into a smile when you nod, a soft, honest “yes” leaving your lips effortlessly. He leans down towards you, keeping your head tilted up so he can easily meet your lips.

He does so softly, treating you with care. His lips are softer than you expected, and the feeling of them against your own fills you with butterflies. He carefully tilts you back, and you let your body fall back onto the mattress, head hitting the surprisingly soft pillows.

Minho crawls over you, spreading your legs apart just enough to get between them, your dress now hiked all the way up your thighs. He’s hovering over you, looking down at you with so much love and lust and that it leaves you speechless. “I’ll need you to listen to me tonight. Can you do that for me?” he asks, pressing light kisses to your jaw, under your ear, your neck. 

You can, because it’s Minho. He’d never hurt you, never try to control you, never make you feel lesser than. So you can listen to him, because you trust him with your care; he’ll take good care of you, you know he will. He smiles when you nod, and you see him smile so rarely that it makes your heart skip a beat; his role always requires him to be so stern and straight faced, that seeing him smile down at you like this is enough to melt you into a puddle. 

“You’re a good girl when you want to be, hmm?” he hums against your neck, resuming his trail of kisses against your skin, and you can’t explain why, but the words and tone he says them in makes your stomach flip.

If you were in a different world, and didn’t have to return home to the castle tomorrow, he’d take his time marking your neck, filling it with pretty shades of blue, purple, and red, sinking his teeth into your soft, supple skin. He just knows you’d look so pretty like that, and the way you react when his breath tickles your skin and his lips linger, tells him you’d like it too.

His fingers trail down your body, finding the hem of your dress and pulling it up over your chest. You lift your back off the bed when he separates from your neck, pulling your dress off the rest of the way and discarding it to the floor. He kisses you as he fiddles with the straps of your bra, effortlessly unhooking it in the back and pulling it down your arms and off your body. 

He may have never married, but he’s no stranger to being with and pleasuring women. And he’ll make sure he makes this a night you’ll always remember for all the right reasons. Capturing your lips in another kiss, his hands take in your now bare breasts, gently kneading and squeezing.

You try to squeeze your legs together, but his place between your thighs stops the act from happening, and he chuckles against your lips when he realizes what you’re doing. “Be patient, Princess, I’ll take good care of you,” he whispers before kissing you again, and you let out a small whine, not knowing exactly what you want but knowing you want something.

You gasp when he takes your nipples between your fingers and pinches them, not too hard of course, but enough to give him the chance to slip his tongue into your mouth. Your body shudders, you feel dizzy with pleasure and excitement, and the feeling of his tongue circling yours is impossibly intoxicating. 

One of his hands travels down, over your stomach, coming between your bodies to feel your heat over your panties. He’s barely even begun and you’re already soaking the fabric, your eager anticipation for more of his touch palpable beyond all else. He nips at your bottom lip, gently tugging it between his teeth before soothing the sting with kitten licks, his hand slipping inside your panties to feel how slick you’ve gotten directly. 

Your body jolts when his fingers run between your folds, and he barely has to move them at all to get his fingers completely coated in your arousal. He pulls back to look at you, taking in the sight of your flushed face and swollen lips, pretty and perfect.

You’re panting, breathless, overwhelmed in the best way possible. You keen when his fingers rub over your clit in circles, your teeth sinking into your bottom lip as you lift your head from the pillows to watch. “Feels good, doesn’t it?” he asks, suppressing a grin when you whine and quickly nod your head.

“Want more, want you,” you mutter, the most timid you’ve ever been in regards to a man. He coos, giving you a sweet kiss as he continues his stimulation to your sensitive spot. “Remember what I said? Patience, Princess, you’ll get what you want. We can’t rush and have you getting hurt, can we?” 

You pout as you concede, and God, he finds that so cute; he’s never seen you actually act shy and pouty before, and it makes him want to give you the entire world. He’ll give you everything you want, anything you ask for, but he’ll have to remember to tease you first so he can see that cute expression on your face before he gives in to your whims.

“I’ll make sure you’re nice and ready for my cock, so just be a good girl and follow my lead until then. You can do that for me easily, can’t you?”Another shy nod, another adorable flushed look that makes his cock throb in his trousers.

It was a little intimidating for you, knowing how experienced Minho must be due to his age, and feeling like you must fall short in comparison to other women– women who knew what they were doing. But really, that was just your own insecurity talking. He didn’t mind at all that you were inexperienced; in fact, it excited him for reasons he didn’t entirely understand. 

Maybe it was the knowledge that he was the first to touch your skin, or maybe that someone as determined and fiery as you are is allowing yourself to concede control, to let him be in charge of your pleasure, trusting him to bring you to utmost bliss. What bigger display of trust could you ever show him? Your glassy, pleading eyes, begging him for more but still waiting for it just as he asked– you’re too good for him. He’s going to ruin you. 

He takes his fingers away, and you have to physically stop yourself from whining at the lack of contact, lest he remind you again about “being patient.” “Open your mouth for me,” Minho requests, and though you are a bit confused, you do as he asks immediately, obeying without question.

Fuck, that’s hot; the image of you, mouth open, tongue slightly sticking out and waiting to receive whatever he gives you is something he never wants to forget. Minho slides two of his fingers into your mouth, instructing you to lick, to get his fingers nice and wet.

Truthfully, you were more than lubricated enough to take his fingers without this step, but he couldn’t resist the urge to see you this way. He pushes his fingers in your mouth down to the knuckle, and you persist with coating them in your saliva even as you gag and tears prick the corners of your eyes. 

He showers you with praise, slipping his fingers out of your mouth when he feels satisfied with the work you’ve done on them, kissing your cheeks, feeling the heat of your face on his lips. Slipping his hand back inside your panties, he presses the tips of his wet fingers to your hole, and you instinctively suck in a breath, body unconsciously tensing from the anticipation.

“You have to relax, Princess, it won’t feel good if you’re tense,” he explains sweetly, shaking his head when you mutter a soft apology. “Don’t be sorry, not for that. Just focus on me, hmm? On this,” he whispers, his lips lingering on yours in a deep, impassioned kiss.

His fingers stay completely still until he feels your body start to release its tension, heeding his advice to focus more on his kisses than the motion of his fingers. He keeps kissing you even as the first of his fingers finally starts to push inside you, and you moan into his mouth, hot pleasure licking your skin. 

He moves his finger in and out slowly, making sure you’re well adjusted before he pushes in another one, hooking his fingers to find that delicious sweet spot he knows will have you crying his name in no time. You gasp loudly when he finds it, your hands twisting the sheets beneath you between your fingers, your entire body trembling.

It feels so good you almost can’t breathe, and when he picks up his pace, hitting your spot over and over as he brings his thumb to your clit, you know you won’t last long at all. “M-Minho, I’m– 'm gonna–” you try to warn him, but the words die in your throat, the pleasure too overwhelming to continue to try and form a sentence.

He simply hums, continuing his motions until your eyes are rolling to the back of your head, sharp, shuddery gasps and moans tumbling from your lips as your orgasm takes you. “That’s it, just let go, just like that, I’ve got you,” he praises, pressing kisses to your hot skin, helping you ride out your high.

Before you can even fully recollect your breath and get your racing heart back under control, he’s pushing a third finger inside, the trembling in your body intensifying from the addition. “You need more to get ready for me,” he tells you, and in your fucked out state all you can do is nod, taking his word as gospel truth, “need to stretch you good to make sure my cock fits.”

All you can do is lay there and take the onslaught of pleasure, unable to think of about anything other than how full and good his fingers make you feel. You don’t even register that he’s moved your down your body and tugged your panties to the side until his tongue is meeting your clit, swirling around it in expertly practiced circles, making you desperately cry out his name.

Your fingers tangle in his hair, tugging harshly as your hips buck up to keep feeling the delicious sensation his tongue provides you. He flattens his tongue and lets you grind against it as you want, the motions of his fingers not stuttering or ceasing despite the movement of your hips. 

You feel the familiar heat pooling your stomach, another orgasm approaching quickly, the sounds you release turning into desperate whines and whimpers as you chase the feeling. It only takes a few more rolls of your hips and thrusts of his fingers to have you releasing all over his face and gushing around his fingers.

He sits up and pulls his fingers out when your body falls limp, chest heaving and ears ringing as you try to recover from the mind-blowing experience you just had. Your eyes are closed, and you can feel his weight shift, can hear the soft clink of his belt unbuckling, followed by the rustling of clothes.

You open your eyes to see Minho’s cock is now out, his hand lazily pumping it and spreading the pre-cum that accumulated and dripped over his time focusing on you. You reach a hand out to touch it, to replace his hand with your own, but he grabs your hand before you can, instead making you intertwine your fingers. 

“Tonight’s all about you, Princess. Don’t worry about taking care of me,” he says, kissing the back of your hand and then holding it down right above your head. You’re not quite pinned, easily able to snake your hand out of his hold if you wanted to, but you have to admit, you like the feeling of his hand keeping yours held down.

He rubs his cock between your folds before he lines himself up with your entrance, though you didn’t miss the subtle smirk on his face when you whined from the feeling of his tip rubbing against your clit. “Squeeze my hand if you need to,” Minho tells you before taking your free hand and bringing it up to his shoulder, “and hold onto me.”

Your heart squeezes in your chest; the hidden romantic in you yearns to tell him you love him, to thank him for taking such good care of you, to express how you never want this night to end, but you know that would be a mistake. Neither of you can afford to let your emotions spill out, so you swallow them down the best you can, deciding to just live in this moment, to experience it for all that it is and all that it means for you.

The initial push is slow, and thanks to his diligent preparation, there is little physical pain or discomfort you experience from the stretch of his cock. A slight sting, sure, but nothing you can’t easily handle, and it’s barely even recognizable when compared to the pleasant fullness you feel. So when you squeeze his hand, and your eyes well with tears, it’s not because you are pained; it’s because you finally have something you want, a happiness you thought would forever elude you.

He takes his free hand and wipes away the tears from your eyes, a soft look of concern on his face. “Hurts?” he asks, but you shake your head quickly.

“Feels good, I just– I..” you struggle with the words, knowing you can’t express how you actually feel about him even if you felt you could. “I know. You don’t have to say it, I know,” Minho speaks to you softly, and the kiss he gives you very nearly makes you sob.

There’s still a few inches left before he’s fully inside you, and he pushes the remainder in slowly as he continues to kiss you, his free hand now rubbing soothing circles on your hip with his thumb. Minho does well at maintaining composure, staying firmly in control of himself and his body despite the way your walls squeeze and suck him in, despite the way you whimper when you feel him throb, or cry out against his lips when his tip kisses your deepest spots.

“That’s a good girl, taking all I give you, doing so well,” he praises you some more, and you love when he tells you how good you’re doing if the way you clench around him is any indicator. “Fuck, Princess–” he groans when he finally starts to move, pulling out and pressing back in much more slowly than he normally would, but the wet friction you provide him is delicious.

“Minho, I–” you start, interrupted by a sharp gasp when he finds your sweet spot with his cock.He looks at you as he stills his hips, patiently waiting for you to continue in case what you have to say is important, or a request for him to stop.

You swallow, face heating up but determined to get out what you want to say. “J-Just this once, I don’t want to be the princess. Call me by name, please–” Oh, that’s what you want? He can do that, easily; he’s already groaned your name countless times in the privacy of his room, stroking his cock to the thought of you.

The sound of your name falling from his lips as he resumes the thrust of his hips has you clenching hard, stars erupting in your vision as he picks up his pace, beginning to quickly and mercilessly hit your spot, over and over again. He takes one of your legs and props it up over his shoulder, allowing more of his cock to fill you up, the creaking of the bed and the sound of skin slapping beginning to overpower the noise from downstairs.

Taking his other hand away from yours, you’ll have to forgive him, he licks his fingers and then brings them to your clit, wanting nothing more than to see and feel you release on his cock. It only takes a few more thrusts and circles from his fingers to have you crying out his name as you cum, fingers digging into the sheets beneath you as your body shakes and legs tremble.

But Minho hasn’t cum yet, so he’s not quite done with you– not that you mind in the slightest. You’ll let him chase his pleasure as long as he wishes, even if it leaves you a drooling, fucked out mess in the end.

He pulls out of you, just long enough to sit against the headboard, and then he’s pulling you on top of him, guiding you to sink back down on his cock and sit fully in his lap. The new position has you rolling your eyes to the back of your head, Minho guiding the movement of your hips with his hands as he thrusts up into you.

He’s quite literally doing all the work, but that’s perfectly fine; this night is supposed to be about you, after all, and he doesn’t want you to lift a pretty little finger. Just let him use you a little until he cums, that’s all he needs.

You’re panting against his neck, head laid on his shoulder and nails digging into the skin of his back beneath his shoulder blades. The sting of your nails in his skin is just how he imagined it to be, and his head is falling back against the headboard, low grunts and groans of your name leaving freely as his cock throbs and twitches, getting closer and closer to his release.

He uses one of his hands to grab your face and lift it up to his, crashing his lips to yours in a desperate, impassioned display of love and lust. A few more snaps of his hips and you feel his cum spurting inside you in long, thick ropes, the sensation sending you forward into yet another orgasm of your own, your desperate sounds muffled only by Minho’s mouth on yours.

Your body collapses against his when the moment slows to a stop, both of your chests heaving and breaths heavy as you lie against him. His arms wrap around you snuggly, and keep you upright against his chest. You can hear the quick, erratic beating of his heart as he catches his breath, looking up at him to see his eyes closed and sweat trailing down his brow towards his cheek.

He looks beautiful like this, you think; you hope he thought the same of you. Even as his cock starts to soften, neither of you move, and though your legs protest and beg to be stretched out, you refuse to leave your spot on Minho’s lap.

“Are you alright, Princess?” he asks once he’s collected himself, pushing your hair from your face and wiping the sweat from your brow.

“Mhm, just want to stay like this,” you reply, and Minho smiles softly, rubbing over your shoulders and down your back in a sweet gesture of comfort. You’re silent like this for some time, just simply enjoying the feeling of him, the sound of the crackling fire, the warmth he and this room provides you.

“Does my happiness really have to end here?” you can’t help but quietly ask, and Minho is quiet for a moment, carefully considering before he speaks.

In a different world, in a different time, in a different place, maybe the two of you are meant to be. There’s comfort in imagining yourself there, truly happy with Minho, letting him care for you while not snuffing out the flame that is your pride, ambition, and spirit.

It’s not meant to be, you both know that to be true. To be with each other required great risk, sacrifice, hardship. But again he has to wonder, is being safe worth the cost of happiness? Would you even truly be “alive” if your every moment was spent miserably?

He doesn’t want to see the very core of what makes you you be snuffed out by selfish, idiotic men and their expectations of what you should be. You’re much younger than him, and it would be impossible for him to be there for you for the rest of your life, but he can be for the rest of his, at least.

“Maybe not,” he answers, unsure of what the future holds for the two of you, but not entirely ready to give up so easily. He could accept his fate, accept that love is something out of his reach, but it’s your happiness on the line that makes him want to fight for it. 

There’s a lot he could lose by helping you escape this life you feel trapped in, but he’d rather see you happy than wasting your days away in the castle, subservient to a man you loathe. Your love isn’t meant to be, but that’s okay; he’ll help you all the same.

He’s loyal to you, and only you, he’s decided– so if you make your future husband, your father, or even the entire kingdom your enemy, then they’ll be his enemy too. And it’ll all be worth it just to see you smile for a little bit longer.

[missnewtuti]

Ok Woso fam, I feel like a lot of uswnt fans should get into softball.

The quick run down:

Softballs back for the first time since 2008. The US lost to Japan in the final gold medal game, and two of those players are on this roster (and this year will probs be a rematch)

Softball is basically faster, more fun to watch baseball. For the Olympics they have a bunch of “pace of play” rules that make sure the games average ~2 hours

A+ uniforms. Some have shorts! Some have pants and belts! Hats, visors, headbands, and braids galore.

Tall Amazon ladys throw ball real good

No fans means you get to hear the teams cheer for their batters and that’s real fun too

The US plays Japan in their final opening round game tonight at 9pm ET / 6pm PT. The gold medal game is 7am ET on Tuesday morning.

Ok, you in? Here’s the full scoop

The History

Softball hasn’t been in the Olympics since 2008, but it’s back this year. It probably won’t be in London in 2024, but it’s likely to be back in LA 2028 (LA has some great softball stadiums and has some of the best college programs).

The US won gold ��� in 2004 and were favorites to defend their title, but were upset by Japan 🇯🇵 in the gold medal match, walking away with silver 🥈

The US has two olympians from 2008, Canada has four, and Japan also has two. You can read more about them here.

The Format

6 countries are in this years tournament. They all played each other once, and the top 2 will play for gold. 3 and 4 will play for bronze.

So far, most teams have played 4/5 games. And with US and Japan both undefeated, they’re locked in for the gold medal game.

The Rivalry

So now the script is flipped from 2008. Japan - the host nation - is defending their gold. Japan has a professional softball league too, so a lot of folks play over there.

Two of the Americans from that 2008 team are back (more on them coming up next), looking to get some redemption.

Like c’mon this is one of those times we can root for the USA with some underdog vibes. Well ok maybe not full underdog, but at least we don’t have to do insane mental gymnastics to have a chip on our shoulder for this one.

The Amazons

Cat Osterman and Monica Abbott are both 6’3” pitchers who have been racking up strikeouts, and are looking to come away with gold after being upset in 2008. Osterman actually unretired when softball was announced for the Tokyo games.

They both still have a ton of impressive college records and some of the current team grew up watching them so that’s fun too. Apparently their coach calls them Fire and Ice.

Here’s an article about the fantasy draft new team every week league Osterman was a player/coach in. She always looks like she won’t take any of your shit and I dig that vibe. Apparently some of the team calls her Momma Cat which is adorbs.

I guess softball is less terrible for human bodies than baseball so these two ladies start every game, and so far Abbott has pitched 2 complete games and was the closer in Osterman’s two starts.

Softball is fun

So, first off, softball is a lot of fun to watch. You get all of the good stuff from baseball - hits and running and stealing bases and strike outs - but it doesn’t feel like watching paint dry.

It’s seven innings, and there’s a ton of rules to make sure the game doesn’t drag on. Pitching changes are quick, and they move between innings so quickly they don’t need to cut to commercial.

The pitchers all have their own little pitch dance they do, like I have no idea what’s going on but it looks cool.

Oh also, this is neat. They don’t make you throw the four balls for an intentional walk. You can literally just say nah, I’m not pitching you, just head over to first.

Some pitchers even hit, which is super neat. This post is gonna be mostly US focused, but here’s Sara Groenewegen, a Canadian pitcher who also hits (she’s usually their DP when she’s not pitching).

The Fashion

Ok, so not to be gay (don’t worry, that’s coming up in the next section) but holy shit softball uniforms are great. So much variety but all just really work (baseball should be taking notes).

I’m biased, but the US has some of the best uniforms. They can go full red, white, or blue, or they can mix and match. The USA on the pants is a nice touch, and I’m a sucker for a good belt.

But there’s a ton of variety. Japan wears shorts! And long sleeves. And hats. I couldn’t find any great pics but here’s one.

And the headwear - the glasses, the visors, the hats, the hairstyles. In my very scientific observations, softball seems to have the highest braid to player ratio of any sport. I guess soccer has buns and softball has braids.

Personally, I’m a fan of some good headband game, I’m sure JJ fans feel me. Some ppl wear face masks and others don’t and there seem to be a bunch of different helmet shapes and styles. Most teams seem to go with visors (I’m thinking so they have more real estate for the braid designs) but some teams go with hats.

Go Gays

As Pinoe once said, you can’t win a championship without gays. It’s just science. All three of US softballs gays (at least based on my cursory Instagram search 🕵️‍♀️) were involved in the US’s extra innings walk off win against Australia. (Chiddy hit the walk off, scoring Haylie and Ally).

Haylie McCleney

She’s the US lead off hitter and has an absolutely insane .727 batting average so far. She also recently got engaged, so that’s cute. Every team has that insane iron man - and apparently McCleney is that for the US. The center fielder leads a bunch of the teams trainings and workout stuff.

Ally Carda

First baseman Ally Carda has also been having a good tournament and is (dating? Engaged? Married? Idk it wasn’t in the Instagram caption and I didn’t feel like digging in) to a former US Softball Olympian (2004, 2008).

Amanda Chidester

Finally, we have Amanda Chidester, an outfielder (and sometimes DP). She secured the US spot in the gold medal match with her eighth inning walk off, earning the US a 2-1 victory over Australia.

She also has the arguably funnest Olympics storyline because she actually played a game against her fiancée, who plays shortstop for Mexico. (She had a sweet Instagram post about it).

The chaos

Softball gets rid of a lot of boring stuffy baseball rules. Rosters are smaller and players can re enter the game under certain circumstances so there can be fun shenanigans with pinch runners.

Also if there’s 2 outs and a catcher up on base, someone comes and runs for them so they can go put on their catcher outfit. Softball appreciates an efficient costume change.

In CAN vs JPN, the umpires messed something up and weren’t gonna let a Canadian pitcher re enter the game and the whole Canadian team just walked off the field like we’re not gonna play til you get your shit together.

So, in conclusion, women’s sports are fun to watch and softball is neat. Hopefully they get some hype these Olympics and we see some investment in professional leagues.

[sneakers-and-shakes]

Local Night Owl Tries To Be Morning Person

As you have probably figured out from the title, I’m not a morning person. I have seen more sunrises from staying up all night than waking up early in the morning and I love it. So naturally, I decided to challenge myself and wake up at 7 am everyday, for a week. Twice.

Let me explain. Mornings for me have always been very functional, I get up at the time I need to in order to be on time.  So around forty minutes to do my stretches, get ready, eat something real quick, and get out the door for work which runs me mostly on time.

It’s a habit I’ve carried on from high school when I would get maybe four hours of sleep, so in order to maximize my shut eye I would get up at the last possible minute that still ensured I got to school on time.

Now, this isn’t my life anymore, I don’t need to be maximizing sleep. So I thought maybe I can actually try and make the most of my morning. Maybe. I started by creating some goals, what I thought/want to get out of waking up early:

I realize this is a hefty list for someone who is the epitome of a night owl, but this is genuinely what I want to accomplish, and these are goals which means they are meant to be worked towards.

And then I decided to wake up at 7am for a week. Back in May.

Since you’re reading this in June, clearly it didn’t go well. The main reason was because I had to unexpectedly move last month and that threw everything for a loop so I ended up dropping the already failing challenge to focus on the move.

But I still want to share that experience with you because it was my honest first try at this so here’s my journaling from the 3 days I tried the challenge:

Journal Entry Day 1: Sunday:

I failed. I could not get up at 7am even though I was conscious enough to turn off my alarm. This is a probably a mixture of the fact that I stayed up till 3am the night before and I always sleep in on the weekends and can’t motivate myself to get up if I don’t have any plans. I actually got out of bed at 12:30 pm today and am so disappointed in myself. This is not a great start to this week and I’m debating starting over next week instead. I wanted to do so many things and not being able to do them they way I wanted is very discouraging.

As you can see the first day didn’t go well at all. In fact, I failed so spectacularly that I almost scraped the whole idea for this week and considered doing it the following week instead. Then I thought that I shouldn’t let this stop me and if this is going to be an honest post of my true experience, I need to share my failure. And so even though I wasn’t happy with myself, I decided to keep pushing on.

Journal Entry Day 2: Monday:

Well something is better than nothing, got out of bed at 7:40am. I stayed up till 3:30am the previous night reading (this is really quite a trend I’ve adopted) so getting up today was harder knowing that I could actually be getting more substantial sleep.

But at least I woke up earlier than usual and did have time to do both my morning stretches and a ten-minute core workout. I also managed to journal for a little bit, including this entry, but I definitely feel the pressure of time and can’t really take things as slow as I had hoped. Nonetheless, despite feeling rushed, this is progress from before.

I used to get up at 7am when I had to actually drive to work, but in the month or so I’ve been in quarantine, working from home has pushed that time by at least an hour (and usually more). I was able to get some things done on Day 2 despite the late wake up. I know this was heavily influenced by my 3:30am bedtime, but there were times (as my alarm periodically woke me up) where I could have gotten up had I pushed myself but I couldn’t do it, feeling the need for more sleep winning over.

I knew this was a mental hurdle but it felt all the more prominent as I had trouble convincing myself that it’s worth it to get up instead of keep sleeping.

Journal Entry Day 3: Tuesday:

Well I got up at 7:30 today, almost by mistake. It’s become second nature for me to ignore my alarms but somehow I happened to check right at 7:30. The tug of sleep is real. I had a hard time opening my eyes and getting myself to actually get up and move. I wasn’t even that tired, I just really wanted to sleep…

Somehow I’ve gotten myself up, it wasn’t bad five minutes into it when I was doing my stretches though. And from there I managed another ten minute workout and have been able to journal too. It’s definitely nicer to have more time today than I did yesterday. I don’t really feel the need to pick out my outfit (since I’m quarantining) so the next 15-20 minutes or so have opened up.

Adding an extra half hour to my normal forty minute morning routine was something I had been tossing around in my head as I started this. That was what I was actually going to implement into my life after this week long challenge was over. Mistakenly, I was able to test it out on Day 3 to see if I would have enough time with the extra half hour to accomplish the things I wanted.

It turned out alright, but I was aware of the fact that I am still mostly running on time with the added workout and journaling and still didn’t have the leisure time to take things slow the way I had hoped. However, my focus and goal for this challenge was to actually wake up at 7 which as of Day 3 I had not done. But still it was progress compared to the previous two days.

As you can see it was not successful. But it taught me a lot about myself and the habits I’ve created that are the hardest to fight.

-I stay up late most nights, the true night owl shining through, and that prevents me from waking up early

-I still hold on to the mentality that if I can sleep more and still get things done then I should sleep more (hence me running on time even though I was able to get things done)

-Actually getting out of bed is the hardest part, once I’m up and active I’m okay, but that first act is the hardest

-I expect myself to snooze, always have which is why I set alarms before I’m supposed to get up so I can snooze them, but it’s created the habit of me not getting up immediately which is probably why getting out of bed is so hard.

Keeping these things in mind I decided to try again, a week ago, to see if maybe I could do it better the second time around. But this time I decided to focus on only the work week, keeping the challenge to 5 days. I also decided to couple this with a morning routine of sorts to make me feel a little better, things I’d let slip since quarantine.

Now a lot of those probably sound obvious, but small things, intentionally done, create big differences. And I just needed to create a routine to hold myself accountable too. Plus. I work really well with lists so I thought this would be beneficial.

And now, for round 2:

Day 1: Monday:

I was conscious enough at 7am to know I should get up but ended up sleeping an extra 25 minutes. I went to sleep at 2 in the morning so that might have been a factor. But even then I know it has more to do with knowing I didn’t HAVE to get up that early. But I was able to get all the things on my morning list done.

Day 2: Tuesday:

Went to sleep at 3am so really couldn’t get myself up at 7am. I wasn’t even truly awake until 7:45 and didn’t make it out of bed till 8. I was still able to get my morning list done though.

Day 3: Wednesday:

Got up at 7:25 this morning, remember being somewhat conscious of my 7am alarm but once again couldn’t get my self out of bed earlier than I needed to knowing I could still accomplish my list without getting up at 7am.

Day 4: Thursday:

Got out of bed at 7:35 this morning even though I woke up at 6:30 wide awake because of some noise outside. But once I realized I had half an hour left, I went back to sleep and this happened. Once again was able to complete my morning routine.

Day 5: Friday:

I don’t know what I did yesterday that made me so tired that I just could not get myself out of bed. I became conscious at 7:45 and didn’t get out of bed till 8:10. I was so tired, even more so than what I usually feel when I wake up. I didn’t got to sleep that late, around 1:30 or so but I really struggled this morning. Today is the first true flop of the week. I got my morning stuff done, after I started working and if I hadn’t been working from home I would not have been able to do more than just my stretches. It’s actually really disappointing.

(Note: I ended up staying up till 6am, had there been a day 6 I would have failed even more)

As you can see, I fell back into the same patterns. True that I’m (for the most part) able to consistently get up early, but only early enough to accomplish my routine. What I haven't accomplished is the "taking it slow" thing that morning people do.

While there are some parts of my morning routine that do force me to slow down, it's not quite what I had envisioned. And I know this is because my morning is still very functional. I've listed out my morning routine and while it's definitely more positive, I'm still only getting up early enough to do those things.

Then again, I’m not a morning person and I don’t think a week can change that. I still view the night as my area of enjoyment where I can relax, read, write, do whatever at my own pace in comfort.

And that’s okay. I don’t think this needs to completely change me as a person. I know that I don’t want to give up the night the way I would need to to wake up early and while my heart and mind lay in the night I will never be able to truly become a morning person.

Your mindset and intention has everything to do in developing new habits or changing old ones and I know that where I’m at and what I’ve accomplished is what I could given those two things.

So yes, I did fail this challenge, but I’ve still walked away with a better, more positive, lifestyle experience. And moving forward, I will find a compromise between sleeping in and waking up early, perhaps some days I allow myself to stay up late and sleep in the next morning and other days go to bed on time to wake up early.

And there you have it, a night owl tries desperately to be a morning person and…somewhat succeeds? It’s not a white or black answer but a shade of grey as most things in life, and it’s been my honest, real experience.

I hope you guys enjoyed! This was a long one I know, but regardless I hope you got something out of it! If you’re a night owl and want to try this challenge out then please share with me your experience! And if you’re a morning person, please share your tips!

As always, thanks for reading!

See ya in the next one!

[bandaids-not-groupies]

Get to know me uncomfortably well - tagged by @livewiredroger ❤️ sorry this took so long to post!! 

1. What is your middle name? 

Janie

2. How old are you? 

21, gonna be 22 in a couple months

3. When is your birthday?

December 4th! A day after Ozzy’s

4. What is your zodiac sign? 

Sagittarius

5. What is your favourite colour? 

Light purple and black

6. What’s your lucky number?

I don’t actually know

7. Do you have any pets?

No but I did have a dog!

8. Where are you from? 

Chicago!

9. How tall are you?

5’0 lmao

10. What shoe size are you? 

6

11. How many pairs of shoes do you own? 

Too many to count lol

12. What was your last dream about? 

I don’t remember 😅

13. What talents do you have?

None lol. I’m boring af

14. Are you psychic in any way? 

Nope lol

15. Favourite song? 

I’m a believer by the monkees (I’ve always loved that song)

16. Favourite movie? 

The Godfather

17. Who would be your ideal partner? 

Keanu Reeves. He has my heart and soul

18. Do you want children? 

Yeah but only like 2

19. Do you want a church wedding? 

Yeah but nothing too big

20. Are you religious? 

Kinda but not really. Like I acknowledge that there could be a God. But I don’t practice it that much. So basically I’M SINNING AND I’M WINNING

21. Have you ever been to the hospital? 

Yeah. Twice. Once cause I had a bad ear infection and then another time I had pneumonia

22. Have you ever got in trouble with the law? 

Nope!

23. Have you ever met any celebrities? 

Yes I have! Back in my emo days I meet Christofer Drew from Never Shout Never, which was actually pure luck! NSN was in town for a concert, but I couldn’t go because it was a 18+ venue so I couldn’t get in (I was in 8th grade at the time). So my family and I decided to go out to eat at a restaurant which was coincidentally across from the venue. So we were walking down the street and I see this huge tour bus right outside the restaurant. My heart starts racing and i thought “how cool would it be if I bumped into someone from the group” well lo and behold as we are coming closer to the bus, Christofer Drew turns the corner and walks towards the bus. So I stop in my tracks and just say “Christofer Drew?” And he stops and he says hi! He asked if I was going to the show and I said no and he goes “well you gotta promise you’ll come to the next one!” Of course I made the promise and I didn’t break it! He came back that summer and I got to see him ❤️ I also met two groups called Breathe Carolina and Crown The Empire. I also met Evan Peters and Sebastian Stan at Comic Con a couple years ago. I also met Corey Crawford. The goaltender for the Chicago Blackhawks, my favorite hockey team.

24. Baths or showers?

Showers! I don’t like the idea of bathing in your own filth.

25. What color socks are you wearing? 

I’m not wearing any!

26. Have you ever been famous? 

Nope lmao and I probably never will be

28. What type of music do you like?

I like oldies. Mostly from the 50s-80s. Anything from Dean Martin to Motley Crue. I do like modern music too. I still listen to some of the bands I listened to in middle school lol (like the ones i mentioned before and others like All Time Low, Pierce The Veil, Sleeping With Sirens, Of Mice & Men, Asking Alexandria, and a couple more.) I also like Greta Van Fleet and 5 Seconds of Summer. I also like spanish music. Like Maluma, Bad Bunny, Becky G, etc. 

29. Have you ever been skinny dipping? 

Nope lol 

30. How many pillows do you sleep with? 

It depends. It could be one or none. Sometimes i don’t use a pillow

31. What position do you usually sleep in? 

On my tummy! 

32. How big is your house? 

It’s a two bedroom apartment. I’m not complaining tho, its very cozy. 

33. What do you typically have for breakfast? 

If I wake up early enough lol it’ll usually be eggs (over medium), some coffee, and some bread 

34. Have you ever fired a gun? 

Nope and i don’t plan on it! 

35. Have you ever tried archery? 

Yes! I tried it when I was in Girl Scouts in elementary school 

36. Favourite clean word? 

Groovy 

37. Favorite swear word? 

definitely FUCK

38. What���s the longest you’ve ever gone without sleep? 

like a day? I got like four hours of sleep the night before. Got up at like 6am, went about my day. Then I stayed up until 7am working on a research paper for class (college is a BITCH). 

40. Have you ever had a secret admirer? 

Nah cause your girl is hella ugly lmao

41. Are you a good liar? 

Not at all. People can tell when I’m lying cause my voice gets high lmao 

42. Are you a good judge of character? 

Eh I do my best 

43. Can you do any other accents other than your own? 

I try to do a posh British accent and I try to do a Steve Irwin Aussie accent   

44. Do you have a strong accent? 

People say I have a strong chicagoan accent but i don’t hear it!

45. What is your favourite accent? 

I’m a sucker for aussie accents 

46. What is your personality type? 

just took the test..i got ISFP-T (adventurer) 

47. What is your most expensive piece of clothing? 

hmmmm all I can think of at the moment is my Doc Martens. They aren’t really clothing but it’s all I can think of lol

48. Can you curl your tongue? 

Nope!

49. Are you an innie or an outie? 

outie :(((( i hate it 

50. Left or right-handed?

Right handed! 

51. Are you scared of spiders? 

YES YES YES

52. Favourite food? 

Pasta! I could eat it all day, every day 

53. Favourite foreign food?

Tamales and Pozole. That’s my shitttt

54. Are you a clean or messy person? 

I try and be a clean person and stay organized but it only lasts for a bit then I go back to my messy ways lol 

55. Most used phrase? 

“that’s a mood” and “no mames guey” (Mexican slang)

56. Most used word? 

Dude and Darling

57. How long does it take for you to get ready? 

Depends. If I wear my hair natural, then an hour. But if I gotta style it, then like an hour and a half or two hours( I got a lot of fucking hair, dude). 

58. Do you have much of an ego? 

Hell no lmao. This bitch has a low self-esteem so 🤷🏻‍♀️

59. Do you suck or bite lollipops? 

Suck 🤪

60. Do you talk to yourself? 

All the time lmao 

61. Do you sing to yourself? 

Yeah sometimes 

62. Are you a good singer? 

Nope lmao but I still do it anyways 

63. Biggest Fear? 

A lot of shit. Spiders, Holes (trypophobia), tearing my achilles or getting them cut (ever since I saw Pet Sematary), dolls, bugs crawling under my skin, throwing up...and i can’t think of anymore on the spot 

64. Are you a gossip? 

you bet your ass I am. Soy una chismosa lmao

65. Best dramatic movie you’ve seen? 

Titanic  

66. Do you like long or short hair? 

On girls, long but not too long. Maybe like mid-back. And guys, long, like ear length and longer 

67. Can you name all 50 states of America? 

Yeah but i couldn’t point them out on a map 

68. Favourite school subject? 

Biology/Human Anatomy. I’m a sucker for science 

69. Extrovert or Introvert?

Definitely an introvert. No doubt about that lol 

70. Have you ever been scuba diving? 

Nope!

71. What makes you nervous? 

Meeting new people, class discussions, and presentations

72. Are you scared of the dark? 

If i’ve just seen a scary movie then yes lol  

73. Do you correct people when they make mistakes? 

Sometimes. For instance, if one of my friends from ecuador uses a word wrong in a sentence, then I would tell them the right way to say it to help them learn more english. i never correct someone to seem like i’m smarter or to be rude. It’s simply to help them. 

74. Are you ticklish? 

Yeah! In some places like my feet, neck, and my back, 

75. Have you ever started a rumour? 

No way! That’s terrible 

76. Have you ever been in a position of authority? 

Only when babysitting my little cousins lol 

77. Have you ever drank underage? 

Yeah lmao. When I went away for college

78. Have you ever done drugs? 

Once, when I hungout with a guy at school we smoked some weed

79. Who was your first real crush?

One of my friends from college. I met him Freshman year and I still like him...I’ve liked him for four years but i’ve never had the guts to tell him 

80. How many piercings do you have? 

6! I have four on my left ear and two on my right ear. I have the standard lobe piercings, then the upper lobe on both sides. Then on my left I have one above the upper. And then I have my helix pierced on the left side. (i hope this all made sense lol) 

81. Can you roll your R’s?

Nope

82. How fast can you type? 

Eh I would say pretty average 

83. How fast can you run? 

Not at all. I hate running 

84. What colour is your hair?

Dark brown! 

85. What color is your eyes? 

Dark brown

86. What are you allergic to? 

Some ingredient in the Banana Boat sunscreen. And some type of plant. I don’t exactly know which one cause I went to the botantic garden one time on a field trip and I don’t know which plant caused my allergic reaction but when I got home I had hives all over me. 

87. Do you keep a journal? 

Nope, never did 

88. What do your parents do? 

My mom is an ortho technician and my dad is a delivery man

89. Do you like your age? 

Yeah I guess. I mean I can buy my own alcohol so that’s pretty neat 

90. What makes you angry? 

Everything 

91. Do you like your own name? 

Eh it’s alright. Pretty boring 

92. Have you already thought of baby names, and if so what are they?

I like the name Elena for a girl and Jonathan for a boy 

93. Do you want a boy a girl for a child?

Doesn’t matter to me

94. What are you strengths? 

I’m a ride or die bitch.

95. What are your weaknesses?

I don’t really share my emotions so I keep things bottled up 

96. How did you get your name? 

My cousin picked out my name 

97. Were your ancestors royalty? 

Not that I know of. But what I do know is I have family from Spain. 

98. Do you have any scars?

Yeah, one on my arm from when I burned myself with my straightener. And another at the place where my nose meets my forehead, between my brows. When I was in elementary school, I was running out on the playground and I tripped and I slide across the cement and scraped my nose and my whole forehead. THERE. WAS. BLOOD. EVERYWHERE. 

99. Colour of your bedspread? 

Light pink 

100. Colour of your room? 

White! 

I tag: @tommyleeownsme, @babe-mustaine, @waycooljunior, and @universal-scorpio ❤️

[survivormyanmar-blog]

Ep. #12 - “Get Over Yourselves and Play The Damn Game” - Ashley

Immunity was posted and it was Back and Forth which involves cutting your fellow tribe mates in order to advance.  Sam and Ting Ting were both targeted early in the challenge and Ashley went on to win Immunity.  After Immunity, Ashley approached her alliance of Amanda and Tommy to vote off Sam with the help of Leah.  Little did she know that Tommy was not actually with them and was working both sides and went to Ting Ting and Sam to vote off Leah.  The three of them were able to convince Linus to work with them to get majority and took out Leah in a 4-3 vote as they thought Leah, Amanda, and Ashley were a tight threesome.  With that, Linus was the only fan remaining.

do these people know nothing about subtlety? at least I won't go on that immunity run like jay said.

So Jay is finally freaking gone. About time. I even got Linus in on the vote somehow. So that is pretty sweet. I am going to try and look into that relationship more because I definitely think something is there. I still have my idol. I was really contemplating using it but at the last second I decided to have some hope for once in my goddamn life. And look where we ended up! I am still alive!

Well I won immunity! This is a really nice feeling. I am guaranteed a spot in the f6. AND I STILL HAVE AN IDOL. I am screaming rn. Like on cloud nine. This shit is great. Hopefully next tribal isn't as freaking frustrating, which of course it shouldn't be; Jay is gone ;) Maybe targeting Sam? Maybe even Ting Ting. Cuz after looking at her moves with our last challenge, she definitely targeted Amanda and I, even before we were ahead of the rest of them, sooo I don't exactly know her business but I sure as hell am gunna get all up in it.  

YAY IT WORKED! JAY IS OUT! So now I just really have to rely on Ting Ting and Sam voting with me from here on out. I also have a pretty unique relationship with Linus and an alliance chat with Amanda/Ashley from the Christian vote. So this round I would ideally want out Leah because she's kind of a goat and if she doesn't go soon everyone will want to go to the end with her. Also out of everyone left in the game I feel she is the least likely to talk game with me.  Lastly, long term people will want to go to the end with Leah and nobody will be willing to take her out in a few tribals from now so they'll continuously not target her and that can be fatal to my game. Also Amanda is a much bigger target to keep in the game and keeping Amanda in will keep Linus more likely to vote with Ting Ting, Sam, and I which will work to our benefit.   My plan for this vote is to talk with Ting Ting and Sam and keep us all together but by doing that we have to keep the secret bond between Sam/I's bond to Ting Ting a secret from everyone else so none of us go and have a majority on the numbers come Final 5. So Ting Ting and I put in a plan that we can get Linus to vote with us by me approaching Linus and myself saying we need to break up the fearsome3some of Ashley/Amanda/Leah. I think this plan has a good chance of working out tbh. Leah going this tribal would be fantastic. If this plan works out Final 6 is Ashley/Amanda/Ting Ting/Sam/Linus/Myself. I would ideally want Ashley out next because she has won 3 individual immunities, has better ties with people than Amanda (especially Linus which is the most concerning), and her smart strategic plays, and social bonds. If we are able to pull of a blindside on her next it'd be great. We'd need myself, Ting Ting, Linus, or Sam to win immunity though. If that plan works out Final 5 is Amanda/Ting Ting/Sam/Linus/Myself would be left and ideally we want Linus to still be against Amanda. We'd need myself, Sam, or Ting Ting to win immunity. Then I think this would be the perfect time to get Amanda to vote for Linus and Linus to vote for Amanda, and cause a 3-2 vote with Linus getting the majority of the votes because he's less of a jury threat than Amanda and way better at comps and I think he can totally rock that Final Immunity if he can get there, if it's a Final 3. If that plan works out the ideal Final 4 is Amanda/Ting Ting/Sam/Myself. This way if we look at the jury Amanda has Steffen, Christian, Leah, Ashley, and possibly Jay which I think Ting Ting and Sam will be able to see by that point and consider Amanda a major jury threat and would win in any Final 3 scenario with us 3 remaining which would give us the reason to give her the boot. We'd just need for Sam, Ting Ting, or Myself to win immunity and cause a 3-1 vote with Amanda leaving which I think is possible. Final 3 I'd ideally want to be sitting next to Sam and Ting Ting whether that it's Final Tribal or the last tribal before a Final 2 because I feel I've made good connections with both of them and been so close to both through out the entire game. If it's a Final Tribal I feel I have an okay shot at winning next to them. Honestly, just getting to the end will make me relieved. For now I just need to continue on my bonds and plans and make sure people don't go after me, turn up the comp skill, and make my way to the end.  

Okay so I am immune and we have tribal in 4 hours AND NO ONE HAS SAID A THING. At the point I am just throwing out Sam's name cuz I think it is about time for him to go. I know I probably couldn't beat him in the end and therefore I kinda want him gone. I am taking a leadership role in this vote and I think I will hate myself in the future for it but shit needs to get done. It is like no one has the balls to say anything so they don't hurt anyone's feelings. Like come on. Suck my dick, get over yourselves and play the damn game. Also omg I think I am starting to like Leah because she is fucking insane like me and we are essentially the same human.

Trevor: *Sends confessionals link to tribe chat* Haven't gotten any!!! Me: Bish I literally just sent one.

*lowkey don't care about this tribal cause I know the 7th place chat is lit and I would be content going there lmfao*

Ashley and Tommy like to laugh at me for sleeping too much when they wanna strategize. ITS NOT MY FAULT THEY WAKE UP AT LIKE 7AM I'm basically nocturnal I cant help it. At this point they should call me Sleeping Beauty and call it a day

Okay y'all this Sam vote has been too easy, I am feeling a little sketched but I am immune soooooo. I just don't want someone close to me to leave. I don't quite trust Ting Ting 100% because she targeted Amanda and I in the last challenge, and then Amanda mostly. So I am a little confused as to why. Linus might be close to Sam so we might have just risked Sam finding out. From what people are saying, it seems like the vote would be a 6-1. But is Fucking Sam plays an idol whoever he chooses will be screwed. So I am thinking someone might have to throw out a vote on someone like Ting Ting or Leah just to be safe. But I just have to find someone willing.

okay so ting ting told me that ashley is pushing for my name which doesn't surprise me. she has immunity so she's probably trying to call some big shots. i'm working on linus to try to get him, myself, tommy, and ting ting to vote for leah. if all works and there's no idols, i'll be in the final 6 for the first time ever! but anything can happen, so i'm going to keep doing all the work i can.

"No one mourns the Wicked! No one cries they won't return. No one lays a lily on their grave." -Wicked (2003 musical) So Jay is gone :( . I'm kind of torn on how to feel about this. Sure she was shady as hell to most people in the game and a huge flipper, but like, she was always honest with me about where her head was at. Now on one hand my closest ally is out the door, but on the other I think multiple groups are seeing me as a possible extra number for them. In the Challenge Ashley teamed up with me  (She made deals with other people too, but at least I think that means Im not at the top of her hitlist) and she also somewhat tried to revive the "The only goddamn trustworthy people left chat". On the other side I have Tommy who I talked to for over an hour with yesterday in a skype call who wants me to side with him. Right now my play is Im trying to solidify a final 2 deal with Ting possibly. I know shes lied to some people, so Im hoping the trust isn't misplaced on my part, but I think I can play it up like with Jay gone I'm just going to become her extra vote. As it stands I think this round Im siding with Tommy and Sam, and hopefully Ting votes with us. Ashley's saying she hasnt heard anything about the vote at all, which is usually a red flag, but with her you never know since she's said that to me every round until like 2 hours before the vote :/ . I really do feel like there could be a f3 deal with her, Amanda and Leah so I want to get to strike while the iron is hot. The biggest problem with going against them though is that it seems like Tommy, Sam and Ting would most want to target Leah. Getting Leah out is kind of a mixed bag for my game. In one sense, Im pretty sure shes been going for me for a while, and if I make the end I can say that I was the fan who did what none of the others could. Thats also the problem with it though. If I become the last fan standing (Get it, like the famous saying last man standing but with an f instead of an m, Im so funny) then maybe others don't want to take me to the end so much since it possibly increases my shot at the end. On top of that, Leah is clearly been the least influential player so even with her wanting me out there hasn't been a vote cast against me since the Steffen boot.

Alright first, alliances and such: Ok it just makes me laugh so much that no one knows how close Tommy and I are in this game. Like omg. We literally swap info daily about the going ons. Like he's close with Ashley and Amanda and I got Linus it's great. Also Linus is nice and he's in a good strategic position for the remainder of the game. Like if he swaps, then boom there goes a vote. Sam is cool. He's really good at comps so he'll probably get immunity for like the rest of the game if he makes it through this vote. Leah is chill, I definitely think she's more focused on BB which is cool. Ashley and Amanda like don't trust me which i'm like fine whatever. Next, this vote: So basically Tommy, Sam, Linus (hopefully), and I are going for Leah this round because there's that Ashley, Amanda, Leah like final three alliance going on that needs to break up before final 6. Like strategically having three people in the game that are really close is bad because that's basically a majority right there going into f6. Ashley thinks that it's gonna be a 6-1 on Sam and he's leaving but... ;). Anyways, my only goal is to get to f5 to figure out what that legacy advantage is (shoutout to Steffen). Hopefully i can make it there. 2 more tribals. Also the cave can go to hell along with the hosts because they are evil people.

ashley actually thinks imma vote for amanda i cannot wait to SHAKE her geez if this all works it's gonna be amazeballs.

my heart my heart my heart that was so awesome. so awesome. i just i omg that was amazing amazing. ashley left that chat so fast!

yikes ashley like you were pushing for me to leave why am i supposed to tell you things