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lala-pipo · 4 years

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(1/18) *peeks from behind the wall* I hope I am still welcomed here hahaha cricket anon is here! <3 I am very sorry for making you worry last time O.O, for sure no matter what happens to the story, I'm going to be right there to read it! Huehuehue, I literally was not lying when I mentioned that this story is bringing me lots of joy this year :3 Cricket anon is fine now! hahaha my last work place was really bad, kind of black-company-level-bad, and it really took a toll on my mental health…

Dear cricket nony, I already answered one of your non-anonymous asks privately because I was so overwhelmed by the sheer amount of email notifications I got from tumblr and Ao3 that I had to thank you right away, but I still want to do it publically because even after days I’m still overwhelmed that you took so much time to write me a whole essay. I’m still all soft and wobbly and squishy on the inside. Your notifications really made my day, week, probably month – so thanks so much again. It really means so much T___T

(2) so, I kind of took two months? break from social media and just literally try and figure out my life lol basically quarter-life crisis also happening, but yeah slowly getting better now! I hope you are doing fine as well, sending you lots of hugs and love ~^^~ Firstly though!! I wanted to say sorry too that it took a while for me to reply hahaha… BUT!! Let me tell you omg during my rest of 8 weeks, I have managed to re-read ALL. SEVEN. CHAPTERS!! So many things to share!!

I’m so sorry to hear that your last workplace took such a toll on your mental health and I really hope that you are going to get better. I cross all my fingers for you and send you good vibes only. Please don’t feel pressured to comment at all. I mean everyone loves receiving comments, but it shouldn’t feel like a chore. So if you feel like sharing your thoughts I’m always glad to read them, but if you don’t feel like sharing them, please don’t feel bad about it. <3

(3) However, since my comments were a grand total of 4,000 words lol, I inserted them in AO3 under "cricket anon" in every chapter! :3 You might get confused as you read them because I take notes as I read the chapter lol hahaha I hope my comments might bring some joy <3 Ahh! By the way! These anon messages are partly not anon since anon asks are limited to 10 per hour? I didn’t know that! :( But since I accidentally have revealed myself to you lol I think it should be okay!

I’ll also try to answer your comments on Ao3 in the upcoming days because (if I remember correctly) you had some questions and I hope I can answer some of them. ^^ But I’m impressed that you went through all the chapters again. We’ve reached 150k now, which is quite fascinating to me because there are still quite a few chapters left. I wonder how long the story will be in the end *hides* I didn’t know that either! I’ve been on tumblr for so long and yet this 10 ask limit is new information for me, but it makes sense in some way – if I think about spam accounts or people going around spreading hate or something.

(4) Also, I think I’m going to make my snorts reactions straight onto AO3 from now on, rather than spamming your ask box with 10+ anon messages hahaha but I’ll still come here to share you my overall reactions and analyzations huehuehue and also to possibly warn you about the length of the comment lol something I noticed, from chapter 1 to chapter 7, the comment got longer lol more things to discuss about, I guess!? But yeah!! Let me reply to your reply to my previous ask here!!

LMAO I admire your dedication. Do whatever is most comfortable to you, I will be happy either way ^^ I think it makes sense that someone can comment more on later chapters because the painted picture gets fuller and fuller with details, there is more information about the different characters, the storyline is more developed and so on… ^^

(5) Is the sad scene in chapter 6, you were referring to the conversation that Jong-Taem were having, and then Jong tried to diffuse it into another lighthearted banter, and Taem is just. tired. of. Jong avoiding the conversation? and despite all that, Taem still let Jong come into his room and cuddle to sleep? idk... I find that scene really heartbreaking :( or maybe it was another scene?

For me it was the shower scene tbh. I don’t know, but it always struck something inside of me (is it weird that I’m saying this although I’ve written it?) There is something very fragile about Jonghyun in that scene and Taemin does feel a little helpless and is so caught up in his own thoughts, in his own needs, what he wants (and doesn’t get from Jonghyun) and yeah – it always makes me go :( but yes, the follow up scene is sad as well because you sit there and think – you two are just so damn dumb, which is something most people, who read this story so far – seem to think constantly, because yeah, they are very dumb – each in their own way. ^^

(6) I think I mentioned in the AO3 comment somewhere that even I started to feel like Taem can just leave Jong because Jong is not trying to understand Taem, I mean, nothing to do with his mood swings or his claim that Taem will get bored of him, just that he isn't trying to see things from Taem's perspective whereas Taem is trying! so! hard! and he even tried to ignore the fact that Jong avoid the vital conversations for like the 10th time already :(

Feelings are a very difficult topic – and while chapters 1-9 are very focused on what Taemin does, thinks, wants, needs, wishes etc. the focus does shift a little over to Jonghyun starting from chapter 10. So the reader does get an inside of why Jonghyun might have acted the way he did. If his behavior makes sense is up to the reader (and Taemin as well) to decide – but I think it shines a little more light onto Jonghyun, who the reader doesn’t know much about – feeling wise –, although he’s one of the main characters of the story. ^^ It’s the onion layers that get peeled one by one. ^^

(7) Yeah, re-reading this definitely showed me muCH MORE parallelism in Jong-Key and Taem-Jong dynamics. Even with Taem's mood in a sense? Like how Jong used to be really upset when Key has a new friend, and then suddenly okay when they do sexy times. Before, I only noticed the puppy-love-ness parallel, but then there is more to it, like I said, Taem's mood affected by Jong a lot, just like Jong's by Key, and also the way Jong claims that Key doesn't understand his feelings,

(8) well, it applies to Jong not really wanting to understand Taem's feeling? by just brushing it off as Taem will get bored of him or Taem doesn't know what he is talking about. I mean as a reader, I am also not sure, if it’s either Jong doesn't care or he is scared to show himself or both or maybe there is another reason? Hahaha ^^;;

This is true and done on purpose. ^^ This knowledge doesn’t play a key (haha) part in the storyline, but it is there to show how blinded one can get by one’s own feelings. After adapting to his new life in a dorm Taemin sees through Jonghyun and Kibum’s relationship quite well, but later when it’s about his own relation to Jonghyun he’s completely blindsided and doesn’t see how unhealthy it is at first – him going back and back and back over and over again in the hope that Jonghyun’s behavior towards him might change.

(9) You mentioned that there will be more Jongtae drought, and honestly, I think they need it? I think some space for them to think about things and you know do other things and talk to other people about other things lol maybe it will clear up their heads hopefully? Ahh!! You said the beginning of chapter 5 is for your own sanity lol I totally understand ;), it was a very sweet scene, soft, and kind of endearing compared to what is coming in the next chapters TnT

It depends on how we describe the drought. The hard cut was done in chapter 8. I went in like a warrior and just cut all the strings, not showing any mercy. ^^” I don’t want to spoiler anything, but yeah – the hard drought will continue throughout chapter 9 – soft drought from chapter 10 …… till ….. *closes mouth* 6v6

Working on chapter 8 made me write two lovey-dovey JongTae oneshots because I couldn’t stand seeing them fight in my own fanfic, in front of my salad. T_T so yeah, the beginning of chapter 5 was for my sanity. While writing chapter 8 I also realized again while I never really write angst, fights – anything dramatic really, because I’m a very chill person in real life, and I like my fanfics to be very chill as well – so writing this was completely out of my comfort zone. For others it’s writing smut for me it’s writing angst lmao. I usually want to wrap up all the characters in fluffy blankets and make them tea, and yet here I am – letting Taemin suffer for so many chapters. I’m a monster T_T

(10) Yeahhh, about the fact that we don't see Key so much since it is in Taemin's point of view, and also the fact that our (the audience)'s perception of Key is very much influenced by how Taem sees Key, right? I think I even mentioned somewhere in the comments, that in a way, a Rashomon effect is present as the readers read the story right, since they are all on accounts of Taem's witnessing, but then also maybe I am just reading too much into this lol

It would be the Rashomon effect if I wrote the same fic out of Jonghyun’s perspective and Minho’s as well for example. In this case Taemin is just a very unreliable narrator and we don’t (well I do :’D) but the reader doesn’t know what’s really going on, if everything Taemin is experiencing is true or if it should be taken with a grain of salt. Considering that everyone in the dorm, except for Taemin, gets along well with Kibum, we might want to believe that Kibum isn’t the bad guy Taemin wants to make him out to be. ^^

(11) Honestly, I could hear my English Lit teacher saying "maybe that is not the author's intention" hahaha xD Yes yes yes!! more chapters for Taem's development!! I am ready for it!! I mean the end of chapter 7 marked the sign of the broken vase, and paired with the JongTae drought, I am looking forward to the next part of the story!! Some character development at this point is perfect I think!! And also!! About the advices, I think I commented a few times on some of the chapters.

(12) I didn't notice that before! And after you pointed it out, I think I made some comments on Minho's, Key's, and Onew's advices to Taem and definitely, based on how the events unfolded, we could argue that the advice was bad - in a way though, I can't seem to tell (yet, maybe?) if the advice giver was genuinely trying to help or do they have ulterior motives? hmmm but either way, I like how you placed a lot of thoughts in the story, even on things such as advice.

(13) Because for sure, in reality, people tend to give bad advices, and act on bad advices. It is true that most fics tend to focus only on the good advice and then the story ends happily ever after. Real life is most definitely not like that :3 your "slice of life" tag is holding up to its name ;) Thank you so much for your hard work!! You added 10,000 words for chapter 7?? omg… huhuhu (insert a bowing LINE sticker)... yeah, for sure, the way the story unfolds in my head,

(14) probably is different to other readers, right? And for sure, very different to you, the author! There are probably a lot more instances, scenes, implications, interpretations? that we as readers are unaware of! Thank you so much for all your hard work TnT, as readers, having more context into the story does give much more clarity on the flow of the story and the feelings of the characters, etc. Thank you for all your hard work! (bow bow bow)

That was something @hwarang-number commented on as well while betaing the story. What if Minho has ulterior motives?!?!?!?!? In Minho’s case it does make sense to give out bad advice to lure in the innocent lamb haha but for example what would Jinki’s or Kibum’s ulterior motives be? Sometimes people want to give out good advice, but in the end it just turns out to be bad advice – unintentionally – humans are just humans after all – and none of us is all knowing, we all perceive things differently, and what might work for one person might not work for the other. I did add 10k to chapter 7 and 25k to chapter 8 – because chapter 8 felt like the most incomplete out of all the chapters in this story.

I think I’ve mentioned it before but hwarang_number is super attentive while reading and figured most things out that I’ve implied – even smaller details which I thought might get lost in the chapters – which I’m still impressed by, but I also said before that everyone reads stories differently, and some aspects that might not be important to me as the author of the story might be important for the readers and the other way around. For the past chapters I just tried to fill in the gaps that might confuse readers unnecessarily. In the original draft of chapter 8 Taemin is doing the deeds with Minho far more spontaneously because he’s so frustrated with Jonghyun – it made sense like that as well – but I think his frustration got more depth through the added scenes. :)

(15) Ah!! By the way!! Please don't feel like you are forced to reply to all of my messages! Having you read them already makes me happy! I don't want to make it feel like an obligation to you because... well omg my comments like super loooooong hahaha ^^;; And yeah!! Take your time with the next chapter by the way!! I am rooting for the development of the story no matter how it will go :3 I will be waiting for the next update (though no pressure, just want to put it there haha)

Dear cricket nony, if you write me 50 message I will still try to answer all of them ㅎㅅㅎ I might just take a little longer. I hope you will like chapter 8 as well, despite the drought ^^

(16) Next time, this cricket anon will bring some more noise ~ I hope your real-life stuff works out well too :D Once again, thank you for answering all of my messages, and for writing this awesomely written fanfiction! While I wait for the next chapter, I think I'm going to re-read songs of siren hehehe :3 Please stay safe!

Please do! Song of Sirens is definitely a story I would have loved to treat like “Dorm Life” in a sense that it would have turned out better if I had worked on it longer, but I’m still a fan of the big brain energy I had running through my veins when I came up with the mythological aspect of the story…lmao So I hope you will enjoy re-reading it. ^^ Chapter 8 is longer than Song of Sirens (just as a side note haha)

(17) Ah!! I forgot to mention!! After I re-read it, my most favorite literary device that you used in this fanfiction (lol this commentary is beginning to sound like a Literature essay) is the Biblical Allusions? I am not sure if this was your intention, but the juxtapositions of Bible verses or reference to God, in Taemin’s thought reminds me heavily of Taemin’s songs, particularly Heaven? It be a sexy time song if you look at the lyrics, but the composition is that of a choir church song

(18) I find the contrast chilling, and maybe you were trying to invoke that feeling to the readers? Orrr maybe I am perhaps, indeed, reading too much into this hahaha ^^;; but really! I really enjoy reading your fanfictions and coming up with analyzations, it’s very fun, and the fact that I can discuss or ask you questions about it is just makes it even more fun – since in Literature classes we can’t actually ask the author of their true intentions right hahaha okay!! I am done :3 Thank you!! <3

It was my intention and still is, so I’m glad you picked up on that. ^^ I always wanted to write a fanfic in which Taemin’s religion plays a role – even if it’s just on the side – I always make some references to Dante’s circles of Hell (when Taemin is being dramatic again) or I also made a reference to Hieronymus Bosch’s painting The Seven Deadly Sins and the Four Last Things in chapter 8. (I’m a big fan of his work – that dude was wild – the way he painted blows my mind every time I look at one of his paintings). So yes, dramatic Taemin talking about religion and throwing around with biblical references is my brain being wild. ^^

I would say that ‘Dorm Life’ is not a really deep story, but I did put a lot of thought into it to not make it your regular smut/romance fanfic. I mean it took time, still does – but I’m glad when people, like you dear cricket nony, appreciate it. So thank you so much for your kind words and sending me all your thoughts and interpretations. <3 I hope you will have a lovely December – please stay healthy and please take good care of yourself. <3

#cricket nony #non-fic post #dorm life #Anonymous

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wannawrite · 7 years

Text

Can’t Tell If It’s An Imitation

who?:Wanna One’s Lai Guanlin

genre: 🌸

type: bullet point

blog navigator.

with pressure from your family, friends and the public, you sign a contract to have a fake boyfriend

i didn’t think I’d enjoy writing this AU so much tysm anon!! omg this got so out of hand i’m sorry!!

- Admin L

you aren’t one for fakes

growing up in a rather well-to-do family with both parents always hard at work and an older brother to take care of you in your penthouse, real luxury goods were all you knew

since your parents are such significant people in the business realm, your family is bound to have powerful allies

in fact, your best friend is the eldest daughter of the Lai family

if you want to know how important the Lai family is….if you don’t know them, you probably can’t get a job in the field

it’s always your family and the Lais'

every time you step out to go shopping with your best friend, there’s at least a couple of paparazzi following you

it kind of only worsened when your brother went and became an idol, debuting under the globally popular WannaWrite Entertainment

or when you signed to be a model with them too

but that is a story for another time

your whole life, you’re swarmed with attention

from your brother

your nannies

‘friends’ in school

and the media

it’s irritating, to say the least

one day, your parents come home and announce that they’ll be meeting up with the Lai family for dinner the next day

it excited you because, at dinners like this, you usually need to dress up but you don’t exactly have to act princess-like in front of people you call your second, unrelated family

it’s always banter and one of the more pleasant events you enjoy

also because you kind of want to see Lai Guanlin, the only son, all suited up

and probably wearing his huge circular glasses

you’ve grown up with Guanlin, you two have known each other for your entire lives yet, you aren’t the closest

most of the time, he is deep in conversation with your brother

you feel bad if you interrupt

it’s always a rare and blessed moment when Guanlin talks to you

currently, he’s in Taiwan and you suppose that’s the reason you’re going out for dinner

Guanlin was in Korea for a few years to train as an idol

he still goes back and forth periodically

which is why you haven’t seen him in a while

great, now the royal family will have two idol members in their midst

excited chatter fills the limousine as your family makes your way to the restaurant that probably cost your entire life savings to furnish and run

you’re a regular at that place and the staff don’t even need to be told to usher your family into a private room

the other family hasn’t arrived and you take that time to talk to your parents and brother

ah yes family bonding time :“)

you and your mum exchange a normal conversation before she asks “do you have a boyfriend?”

‘Nope. why?

‘hmm, just checking…..what about Lai Guanlin?’

‘…mother, why?’

she smirks and sighs, ‘why not? he is a fine and good looking young man. i would definitely support your relationship.’

‘Besides, half the boys in your grade aren’t even good looking?’

your jaw drops and giggles fall from your lips

Mum shrug, “just keep an open mind. he’s always an option”

then, there are two polite knocks on the door and Mrs Lai steps in, greeting you with a smile

thank God, she’s busy with other things now so she won’t pose any other strange questions

your mother runs over to envelope her in a tight hug

they kind of knew each other back in college and finally reunited again

“my son has returned from his journey to Korea!”

at the mention of Guanlin, you can feel the heat rising to your face and your heart starts beating madly

especially after what your mother has said

me and Guanlin

Miss Lai brings you in for a loving hug

despite the age gap, you two never felt awkward.

Guanlin strolled in a few seconds later, warmly welcomed by your brother and family

you gulp and is unable to even look at him

of course, his father follows suit and once again, the power families are together

dinner continues as per normal

questions, small talk, savouring the good food

after some time, your best friend points out that your parents have been conversing with her own for quite awhile now

lowkey you’re worried because of the serious looks etched on their faces

is it about me…..

suddenly, Mrs Lai clears her throat and turns to you, silencing all previous conversation

“Y/N darling,” she says “have you…started seeing anyone?”

you were just counting the number of minutes it took for someone to pop the question

so far, the record was 86 minutes and 17 seconds

the last time, it was your cousin who asked you about your tragically non-existent love life

you dabbed your napkin onto the sides of your mouth and smiled before replying, "no, I’m not dating anyone at the moment”

a knowing smile dawns on her lips while your mouth falls open at her next sentence

“what about my son?”

ASDFGHJKL WHAT’S IT WITH THE PARENTS TRYING TO GET US TOGETHER

Guanlin’s chopsticks are set down on his chopstick rest and he wants the floor to swallow him up

his parents were talking about that matter earlier that day

‘ma, please don’t be like this,’ he reasons and shoots you an apologetic smile

the blush on your cheeks is your response

“I’m just putting you out there since you aren’t doing it yourself Lin, I’m not getting any younger…” she shoots back

friendly reminder that Guanlin is still a minor and sexualising him is disgusting

“you two would be perfect for each other,” Mr Lai adds. “its good for your wellbeing, it’s only a bonus its good for the press”

your brother - seated next to you - can’t hold in his snickers and tries to cover up with a cough

his acting is pretty awful but no one pays him any mind

you open your mouth to reply but your father holds up a hand

“give it a thought sweetie, taking chances never hurt”

then all reverts back to normal but your life doesn’t

the next week or so, your parents keep bringing it up over meals or just giving you that look

it’s driving you mildly mad though the thought of having Guanlin as your boyfriend does sound very appealing

but if he isn’t comfortable with it, you won’t have even if you’re forced t

there’s enough stress and pressure from the media about your life and you really don’t need your parents to worry about it either

after one supper of constant discussion about that matter, you give up, flop on your bed and call your best friend

she answers right away, already suspecting what the call is about

“h-”

“hANG ON I NEED TO SCREAM”

your rant is a mixture of emotions that have been pent up and unable to be released. you spend the next hour filling her in on all the details. how your parents have been leaving more hints and encouragement to date, someone

*cough* Lai Guanlin *cough*

she reveals that things in the Lai mansion have been about the same as yours. it is kind of pissing everyone off but no one has the heart to crush their parent's hearts like that

“it’s better than last time when my dad tried to arrange my marriage with some dude. it got called off, in the end, thank God.”

you’re about to YELL when she stops you, “Lin and I have been talking and…I think we have a solution to at least get the family off your backs. Come over.”

well, you clad in your comfy pyjamas and it’s 9pm, you want to sleep but this is a life or death matter so you find yourself pulling on another outfit and dashing out the door

“bye mum, I’m going to the Lai’s house!”

“okay! sure sweetie!” she replies “don’t even think about coming home for the night” she nearly adds

your chauffeur is wondering why you’re hurrying there so late but she doesn’t mention anything as the car arrives outside the mansion

the Lai siblings are already running out to receive you

“shall I wait for you?”

you stare at the mansion’s daunting double doors and then back at your chauffeur, “it’s fine, you can head back. thanks, see you!”

‘my parents are probably in the sitting hall so….be prepared,’ Guanlin whispers as he ushers you inside, his sister checking the foyer

you hastily greet them before the siblings make a noise about your purpose of visitation and bundle you upstairs to Guanlin’s bedroom

the interior hasn’t changed much since you were last in his room, just a bit more messy and maybe a couple more of gleaming basketball trophies displayed

his sister snatches a manila envelope of documents off his desk and hands it to you

you peel it open to reveal a fifteen-page contract

Guanlin and Y/N’s fake relationship™ to be specific

“i hope you’re prepared to be up all night establishing contracts and signing them. this is just a rough draft.”

Guanlin scans the pages over and immediately makes a couple of changes

“consensual skinship and other intimate actions such as hugging and kissing” is added

“to make it more realistic…you know” he mumbles in embarrassment

but you kind of feel the same way so you add “cuddling” in there too

it’s nearly 12am by the time the contract is finalised and printed

there’s no way you can call your chauffeur now so you decide to sleepover

besides, it has been awhile since you and your bestie had a sleepover

you get confused when she shoos you off to Guanlin’s room but hands you an oversized shirt and a pair of running shorts

you change in her room then venture to Lin’s

“goodnight!”

Lin isn’t in his room but you find him in the gaming/lounge room where there’s a mini bar, many game consoles, a television, a sofa with a chaise lounge and even a pool table

He is playing a game on one of the consoles, Overwatch, you think it is

wordlessly, you sit next to him and scroll through your IG feed, unsure of what to do since you literally got thrown out of your sleeping place

thanks a billion bestie

“so we’re a couple now,” Guanlin breaks the silence. “we should act like one.”

he leans closer such that his mouth is close enough to brush your cheek and murmurs, “We need to act like one. Let’s make it believable. They’re watching us through the security cameras”

you chuckle, “oh god. I know all about security camera footage.” you reminisce you rebellious teenage days when your parents installed a camera outside your room door to track what time lights went off

like a professional, you tuck your legs under you and lean your head on Guanlin’s shoulder, taking note of how his breathing abruptly stopped when you wound your arm through his

you would have opted for holding his hand but he’s holding onto the gaming controller

it’s so comfortable you can almost fall asleep in that position

“…by the way, you look really good in my shirt…”

a hot blush creeps its way to your face and you stammer back an incoherent reply. “O-oh, s-sorry. Your sister gave it to m-me. B-but t-thanks.”

thANK YOU BEST FRIEND

you should have known he was a Thrasher kind of guy

get you a man who lets you sleep in his Thrasher shirts

“hmm, let’s get to know each other. I think the last proper talk we had was in 8th grade and clearly, things have changed.”

Guanlin snorts. “Yeah, who would’ve thought we’d date.”

you have to constantly remind yourself it’s a fake relationship. It doesn’t feel like one and you don’t want it to be one

the convo lasts till 2am and Guanlin decides that you need to sleep. pretty much forces you to take his bed while he sleeps in the gaming room’s chaise lounge

but the bed is foreign to you and you have a hard time falling asleep so you wander back and join him on the other side of the couch

at least, you have that assurance that your ‘boyfriend’ is beside you

no one questions your new attire or manila envelope when you arrive back home after a long night

Guanlin insisted on walking you up to your penthouse, he pecked you on the cheek before bidding you goodbye

on Monday, you’re really confused when you emerge from your room, clad in your school uniform and find Guanlin sitting at your dining table, talking to your parents

when he sees you, he beams, like an actual gummy smile you can’t fake

“good morning bao bei. did you sleep well?”

chemically combusts @ bao bei [宝贝, baby in chinese]

you rush to pull him into a warm embrace

“why are you here? what is happening?”

‘i’m sending you to school today”

throughout the ride, there’s small talk and it makes you feel very…refreshed and excited

there’s so much adrenaline pumping in you, at the end of the ride, you lean over and press your lips to his

“bye! thank you! see you later babe.”

djskdhkss wow yes totally a fake relationship

also your first kiss wAS WITH YOUR CRUSH KIND OF BOYFRIEND

Guanlin so shocked he can’t remember how to drive and nearly reverses into the driveway pillar

after school, it’s like a scene from a Kdrama

“hey, whose man is that?”

Guanlin is casually leaning on the bonnet of his expensive, shiny car with his sunglasses up and is fully suited up - minus his jacket hanging in the backseat.

yOU WANT TO DIE

RUN ME OVER

but at the same time, you kind of want to show the world your 'boyfriend’

Lin Lin isn’t the kind of guy who shies away from you, though he does feel his insides churning with the entire school watching him

you feel your backpack being lifted off your shoulders just as you were about to hug your friends goodbye

‘babe!”

gasps and whispers break out from the other students, your friends can die of laughter

Guanlin waits for you to catch up, slipping an arm around your shoulder while the other carries your school bag

“how was school today? did you miss me?”

“you’re doing this because of the contract aren’t you?”

a look of confusion crosses his face but he tries to conceal it with a nod. “You know I’m not one to break contracts”

but you’re one to break my heart….

the relationship comes to the light on Friday

the family is freaking out and congratulating you like it’s your wedding day

you even set reminders on your phone saying

'your boyfriend isn’t really yours’

it kind of hurts but it also reminds you not to immerse yourself too deeply into this situation

you find that your phone is always chiming with notifications from Guanlin, much more than usual

he wants to know if you’re eating, sleeping and staying hydrated

you feel touched until you realise it’s on page five of the contract

on Saturday, an event is arranged for the two of you to go public

you’re going out shopping in the hottest part of town where you KNOW cameras will be

they don’t fail to meet your expectations

other than the annoying flashes, you’re genuinely having a good time with the 'boyfriend’

he buys you an ice cream and holds all of the shopping bags

nothing seems forced or fake, it’s like a real relationship

BREAKING: Power families have joined forces through blood, Y/N and Lai Guanlin confirmed to be dating

[ JUST IN ] Lai Guanlin and Y/N spotted enjoying a shopping date downtown. New celebrity couple on the rise?

[ NEWS ] Your new OTP! Y/N recently went public with boyfriend, Lai Guanlin and they are the cutest couple we have ever seen!

it’s the only news the tabloids will report about

it is brilliant news though, even the reaction’s are positive, the world loves you guys so much

all is well for months

you really warm up to having Guanlin as a boyfriend

dates with him are never boring, it’s always something new and enjoyable

once it was ice skating

you found out that while Lin was athletic beyond words, he wasn’t the best at skating but the two of you still had a blast

the number of memes you got from him falling was amazing

another time, you took him to see a ballet, Romeo and Juliet to be more specific

it was nice to see him all suited up, just for you

ballets could be boring when you went by yourself

so you were glad Guanlin was there to accompany you

he kept his hand in yours throughout the entire 3 hours

during the intermission, he purchased a $4 bottle of mountain springs mineral water for you

how sweet

you got mad because that water is SO overpriced and he shouldn’t be making reckless financial decisions just because he’s rich

Lin just ruffles your hair, other arm slipped around your waist

“babe, you worry too much about me,”

“weLL AS YOUR GIRLFRIEND I SHOULD BE” a hand flies over your mouth after you realise what you blurted out

his eyes widen significantly yet he doesn’t correct you about the 'fake’ part, instead, he holds you close to his side and waltzes back into the amphitheatre

other days, it’s either you’re at his mansion or he’s at your penthouse

just fooling around

in a cute way, like hide and seek around the house

which leads to nearly knocking over a ton of expensive house decor

wh00ps

baking goods following Buzzfeed recipes

“wait, this actually tastes edible…?” Lin says tentatively

you laugh, “maybe it’s because you made it.”

‘it’s the best”

then again, you’re a biased adjudicator

Lin is that kind of chef who tries to play a prank and make things taste terrible but unknowingly, he adds ingredients that make the cookies taste much better

then you guys cuddle on the couch snacking on cookies and watching Netflix shows

and you’re entering Autumn as a 'couple’

you can’t wait to do seasonal activities with him, you even made a list

suddenly, Guanlin suddenly asks, “….when do you want to terminate the contract?”

then, your heart shatters into pieces

you stopped the reminders on your phone and making mental notes that it was a faux relationship

you stopped wanting it to end

and that was your biggest mistake

you might as well just scrap all the dates you planned out since this is ending

instead of crying, you crack a smile and tell him you’ll bring your manila envelope over to his place the next day to review the contracts

“get home safe,” he wishes and leans in for a kiss which you dodge but hug him

hurt and puzzlement flashes in his eyes but you know he’ll understand

the tears finally fall in the car, way past his front door, and your chauffeur pulls over to pass you tissues

everything was just too good to be true

no one could tell it was fake

in your penthouse, you ignore the files and ponder about burning them in your fireplace

nothing was real

you just tricked yourself into believing so

perhaps he found someone else, someone else he could be with happily, with no extra baggage tagging along

he deserved that freedom and a joyous, legitimate relationship

it hurt, it truly did

it was like everything you did or said in the last half a year meant nothing

tears cloud your vision, you throw yourself onto your bed and sob

regardless of your puffy face or tired eyes, you’re at the Lai mansion the following day with your document

the silencing is deafening as you two are going through the contract and a new set of documents is printed

you decide not to involve your best friend this time

you can’t bring yourself to tell her anyway

she had high hopes for the two of you, despite knowing that this day would probably come sooner than she expected

the sniffles won’t stop and the tears are filling up your eyes, with every flick of your paper, one threatens to fall

the silence can strangle you, you aren’t used to quietness with Guanlin at all - there was always something to talk about

“…is this your first breakup?” he questions

you shoot him a weak smile and nod, scribbling your signature on the second last page of the document

every time the tip of the pen touches the paper, you feel it pierce into your heart

why do you want it to end?” you whisper, voice barely above a mutter

Guanlin sighs and looks down at his hands, he hangs his head in shame

“you know it has to, we can’t go on like this forever”

what he says is true, you find yourself agreeing to it

“but-but I don’t want it to,” you retort softly despite it all

he spreads his arms open, inviting you for a hug which you instinctively respond to. crawling across his bed to settle in his comforting embrace

“i-i know this is tough but believe me, it’s for the better”

you can’t tell what’s 'good’ for you anymore

maybe you shouldn’t have agreed to this in the first place

first heartbreaks are unforgettable

your life is just too centred around contracts, paperwork, it’s all you have ever known since the start

Guanlin rocks you in his arms for probably the last time ever and tears drip down your face

“ahh, don’t cry! i’m sorry, but i have my reasons,” he coos as he swipes the tears away with the soft sleeve of his sweater you lost count of how many times you have fallen asleep in

“i can tell you one of them”

you don’t know if you can take it

a billion thoughts swarm your head

“i hope you’ll still take me back”

nothing registers anymore

you realise you really liked Guanlin

and now, it’s coming to an end

“y/n” his hand encloses yours, the one that holds the pen

the pen that paused on the last sheet of the new contract

Guanlin grins at you, cupping your face in his hands

you force the tears to stop

“I just want us to be real, no contract, no paperwork, just us”

the dilemma between killing him and kissing him is extreme

“ Lai Guanlin! How dare you! I wasted all this pen ink on you!”

“…you’re worried about pen ink?”

you fold your arms and huff in frustration, the tears melting away like ice and anger frosting over

but he shoots you a gummy smile and apologetic puppy eyes and once again, your heart has warmed

Guanlin pulls out a Tiffany & Co. box from his desk drawer, offering it to you

inside, captured between plush velvet cushions is a gleaming gemstone ring

gasps and splutters of words leave your mouth

“ADOSISODJSJSNDJSPSDJ WHAT”

“it’s a promise ring. I promise we won’t have to 'act’ like a couple but we can be a couple”

you want to yell

he kinda just does that husband thing and slips it on your ring finger

you still can’t believe your eyes, your jaw has numbed off from being open for too long

“is-is this real?” you squeak, marvelling at the promise ring

Guanlin winks, “you know I’m never one for fakes”

you groan, poking his cheek. “I told you to stop making reckless financial decisions!”

he just shakes his head as he chuckles

“babe, when it comes to you, you’re worth everything. trust me, this isn’t an imitation. I hope you love it,”

you lean closer and capture his lips with your own, kissing him with that passion and adoration that can’t be faked

#Admin L #wanna one #wanna one scenarios #produce 101 #produce 101 scenarios #lai guanlin #yoon jisung #ha sungwoon #hwang minhyun #ong seongwoo #kang daniel #kim jaehwan #bae jinyoung #park woojin #park jihoon #lee daehwi

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subetaspeaks · 7 years

Text

Clarifications and Facts from Latreia

Hello, this is Latreia. Sorry for the essay ahead -I need to straighten out and clarify a few facts in reply to my first shit/flame post because seriously please make your complaints/comments credible with context and facts: FYI: I did NOT ask every single person who slotted. Please also feel free to check comments to see how I asked. I did not realise that it would come off creepy/stalkerish/shitty to ask people whether they would be willing to sell/trade the eyepatch (mind, I only asked each person I contacted once, and if they say no I did not try further - and I did not beg to get it for free), so it is refreshing to know that even asking could be an annoyance. If you are not comfortable with me asking, please just let me know. I like being straightforward and that is my personality. I missed the slotting time of the eyepatch due to being in a different time zone, and I have seen enough cases of people slotting on things and then selling/trading it almost immediately due to whatever reasons you can think of - so I thought, why don't I try asking politely? The worst reply I can get is a no and/or a block. I completely understand why people won't part with something, but my experience tells me that asking directly about a CW is the best if you are interested in it. Regarding lowballing: I noticed that standards vary A LOT on this issue. For me, it's the attitude that counts. I usually ask for item prices first and if I'm told to offer I am usually conservative in my offers when I'm unsure because I over-offered many times in the past and lost out a lot. I'm however always happy to up my offers if I can afford it when people think my offers are too low, or I'll decline when the prices given are out of my budget. Would simply offering Varsna Wow, I wish you told me directly about how much you hate me and your pent-up anger. Funny how your complaints are so exaggerated and inconsistent though - such a slander. I did NOT "ask you almost non-stop over three months" regarding the lunar marbles. Also, when did you say 'no' to me the '5th' or '6th time'? In a 9 February 2017 post you also accused me asking you 4 times in the last 30 days, while actually I only asked you twice in your board since late December 2016. Check your facts, given below for your reference: FACTS (forum search ftw): -My first post to Varsna on the STATUS of a few lunar marbles was on 17 March 2016 (then I went on hiatus and forgot everything about subeta) -My second post to Varsna asking if he would let go of ANY lunar marbles is on 17 January 2017 -My third and last post to Varsna on AN CW TRADE OFFER FOR ONE MARBLE was on 3 February 2017 (I said explicitly that I wanted to try tempt him) Varsna, you complained about me not asking you about the sell/trade status of the marbles - and then complained I asked you about the marbles too many times. Wtf what do you want? I was trying to be polite and not be an annoyance :c CONTEXT for everyone else regarding me being "lowkey being shitty about Varsna not selling marbles (in Varsna's opinion)" - this can be found through a forum search: All my relevant posts: "@Ursa: Actually I have wanted to ask for a long time - is there a no sale/trade policy with the lunar marbles released privately? I know for some private CWs the releaser doesn't put any restrictions on the items (=the items can be sold / traded), and so I thought the same goes for the marbles c: would appreciate it if you can answer my question, thank you very much! ♥" "@Ursa No worries, thank you so much anyway! ^^ The reason I'm asking is because if there is a no sell/trade restriction I can definitely stop being so desperate lol. Varsna has told me that he will not auction off any more copies/ sell his own copies which I perfectly understand, so the only way to obtain the private marbles will be by: 1) buying the public copies, 2) buying from those who have the marbles (if there is no sale/trade restriction). So far I haven't gotten a definite answer on whether the marbles have any restrictions, but I have seen people who are looking for them asking holders of the marbles as well c: As long as I don't have a clear answer I guess I'll be haunting around for the private marbles XD" "@Varsna Ahhhhhh I apologize if I come off as that to you :x to me I was just stating what information I learned from you...I asked you two times on your board if you would let go of the marbles since late Dec and therefore didn't want to bother you anymore with further questions! I felt like further questions would be hounding you :c" PS: It's ridiculous to suggest that I would hand pick YOUR friends to ask about the marbles. I treat each user as an individual, not by tagging them 'XXX's FRIEND'. And I actually don't know who is on your friend list o___0 Sometimes people do trade owned CWs for CWs they really want and there are topics in r200 like 'look through my owned list/wishlists and offer csc/trades'? It just so happens that I'm asking your friends through this method - but way to go re: your imagination. Takeaways: 1) Asking is not a sin. Begging is a completely different matter. But by all means feel free to tell me you don't like being asked about 'x'. I won't know how you feel if you just post Anon on subetaspeaks. Anon, just block me - I don't really like your style. 2) If you don't like me, go ahead and tell that straight to my face. If it's something I can't change your opinion on/ resolve with you/ you find me unbearable for whatever personal reason, do block me. Don't give me all the smiles and hearts in our conversations if you don't like me (i.e. n_n and ❤️) because damn that is two-faced and way creepy. Okay, Varsna? 3) Do not make false accusations without any context or facts. That is slander. (I wonder if that is reportable.) And anyhow the Subeta community guidelines: "Statements that are crude/verbally abusive are uncalled for, no matter whom they are directed toward." Thank you very much for taking the time to read this.

#subeta #user #submission

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esselley · 8 years

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Have you ever received a hate comment? If yes, and you don't mind me asking, what was it about? I wonder how other writers cope with negative comments.

I’ve never received a hateful comment on my work directly – knowing how the internet is, I count myself pretty fortunate in that regard (knock on wood).

The most negative experience I’ve had was during my time spent writing for a budding, tiny fandom, during which I started out writing one pairing, but then wrote some stories for a couple other pairings (kinda rarepairs) later on.

After I wrote a couple of those fics, a friend found one of those confessional blogs… Fandom Secrets or whatever, and the tag for our fandom had just been spammed with “confessions” about my writing. It was like a guilt/intimidation train, with me in the headlights. How I’d abandoned the fandom, how my new fics weren’t any good, how I should get back to writing the original pairing because no one cared about the new stuff… so I wrote my pièce de résistance for that main pairing, posted pics of each “confession” on my blog and roasted them for not having the guts to say their shit to my face, and then left the fandom entirely. Shady, manipulative assholes make me lose my chill real fast.

That being said, hate comments can go right in the garbage for myself and anyone else who receives them, because in a majority of cases, nothing usually warrants the hate – there are just worthless people out there who want to make other people feel worthless, too, and it’s a fucking waste of everyone’s time.

Popular or unknown, writer or artist, small or big fandom, having people deposit hateful words on something you created for nothing but your own happiness, because you love it, is flat out shit. You are the person making something of your own creation. They are the person who got mad enough over some OOC-ness (or whatever) to type “this sux go die” on someone’s efforts to create and improve. Again: FUCK THAT NOISE! Those people are losers and probably smell like sweaty socks 24/7. Put them out of your sparkly, inventive mind.

I also want to distinguish between the different types of “non-positive” comment, because there’s a big difference between hateful and negative. I thought about this, and think maybe I would separate it into 4 categories:

Con-Crit (commentary meant to educate and encourage improvement)

Criticism (commentary discussing positives and negatives in a work)

Negative (commentary that focuses mainly on flaws/things the reader disliked; usually more personal than analytical)

Hate (unconstructive bashing)

Con-crit is usually the most acceptable option, with hate being the least (like, just don’t! do it!) but I want to say off the bat that unless a fanfic writer has asked for con-crit/criticism, or discussion about what readers didn’t like – IMO, none of the negative types above are necessary to leave on a work. This doesn’t apply to published work, because those are authors with publicists, editors, and most of all, experience in putting their work out under the public eye. They also get paid to do so.

Fic writers and fan artists have no one checking their work but themselves, and are uncompensated save for (sometimes) getting positive feedback. A lot of us have no experience in publishing or exhibiting professionally. So unless someone is looking for critique, it is okay to just… skip telling someone that you thought they could be better. Chances are, they’re already worried about it. They most likely know that – and they’re trying to get better already. People aren’t submitting their work to Tumblr or AO3 or DeviantArt to be critiqued, they’re just posting to contribute to a fandom, to make friends, because they see other people doing so. Because it’s community, and it’s fun.

If you really feel like you want to let a writer or artist know about something, don’t just drop the comment and leave – ask if they would mind talking about their work and some points of improvement, so they aren’t blindsided. Message them somewhere private, instead of posting about their shortcomings in a public comment/reply. Especially for newer/less well known writers or artists. It takes some people a lot of courage to post something publicly. The need to create and share can help overcome those anxieties somewhat. But seeing a notification or comment pop up when you don’t receive a whole lot of feedback, only to find out it’s someone telling you “Hey, here are some things I think you need to work on,” can be really discouraging.

And some of the fics people like to point and laugh at, or leave mean comments on because of things that do not hurt or inconvenience the reader in any way (other then maybe having to hit the back button) are the exact kind of fics I proudly posted on FF.net when I was 10 or 11. If someone had slammed me with a bunch of hate back then, maybe it would have tanked my confidence enough to cause me to stop writing – for a short period of time, or to this day.

Who the hell knows? Who knows what other nameless fic writers out there could have improved, but didn’t, because of some stupid anon telling them their very first fic sucked?

So if someone is enough of a fuckface to try that shit with you, my friends, you’ve got two roads: delete the comment, or slice and dice their sorry ass into next week – I support you in both efforts (just know that the first option is usually better, unless you like to FIGHT, in which case, go for the second). But just know that, while there is no real way to avoid those kinds of comments getting under your skin, you are better than the one who left it.

You don’t owe them the dignity of a response, but you do keep writing, because while they are using their keyboard to shout into the void, you are using yours to further your creativity and art, and that will not be lost.

#writing advice #i think #writing advice: community #rambling discussion about polite commenting/critiquing under the cut #literaryalexis #esselle replies #negativity

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