#also think a lot ab how adults should respond to it? bc in my experience nothing really works

[padfootastic]

harry started smoking shortly after the events of the secret camera, he probably found the cigarettes in Uncle Vernon's things . He probably doesn't tell anyone, at first there were just a few but those of thinking that his father's "assassin" is trying to kill him,the tasks in goblet of fire, Cedric's death, the almost death of sirius here sirius is alive so after all this, it became a habit that not even sirius remus anyone in the order knows i can only imagine them discovering molly surtan...

did this get cut off towards the end? 👀

regardless, i love this sm!!! harry being full of rage and conflicted feelings, not knowing/being taught how to deal w them. he finds a cig and tries it just for the heck of it (can’t get any worse right?) and lo and behold, things don’t suck as much for a few minutes. he can peacefully float away from all his troubles if only for a small amount of time (genuinely this line of thinking leads me to more substance use hcs like harry’s had the most terrible life and it lends itself very much to those) and over the summer he gets used to those. takes a few packs to hogwarts w him, sneaks off for a smoke every now and then when things get too much, tries to hard it from the people around him.

and like, the thing with cigarettes is that they’re such a slippery slope lol so i can totally see him going for riskier and riskier smoke breaks until he’s finally caught one time. maybe at grimmauld place where there’s only so many places u can hide?

molly will definitely lose her shit, like no question. she’ll be the kind who’ll assume unwanted responsibility and berate him without giving him space to breathe imo (ik she’s much softer when it comes to harry, but i can def see her w the potential to do this). remus would probably pull another ‘your parents didn’t sacrifice their lives for u to kill urself this way harry >:(‘. arthur would bumble around a disappointed, well meaning, but ultimately useless ‘this isn’t the solution’.

sirius, though. here’s my bias coming in. i think he’d be the best equipped to deal with that bc i hc him smoking from a young age as well, for similar reasons. so he gets it, unlike literally everyone else, but most importantly he gives harry the space to talk about it. he’ll be interested in knowing what happened, why he feels the need to rely on cigarettes, and then gently GENTLY help harry come to terms with the fact that his grief is valid without having to resort to damaging substances AND help him find new coping mechanisms. generational healing and unlearning harmful things ftw amirite?

(alternatively, im also just here for a harry who started smoking super young and never stopped ngl)

[fairycosmos]

this is random but like obviously we're in an internet culture or whatever where mental illnesses are basically being glamorized under the guise of "awareness" like it's cool to brag about depression/anxiety now and I absolutely hate it like I feel like we're sometimes moving backwards but also with that has come this weird "anti-recovery" stance a lot where like people completely disregard like meditation or going on a walk because they're like "OH YEAHHHH thankksss my depression is cured now 🙄" and like obviously no one is saying depression goes away by doing that stuff but it also makes life more enjoyable?? like going on a walk on a sunny day definitely brings more happiness to you than laying on your bed in the dark that can't just be disregarded because it's not a full on cure (also, meditation has quite a bit of science surrounding it about it's effects on the mind). i saw a tweet earlier that was like "students with anxiety should not be forced to present in class" and I understand the sentiment (and I also understand it's not the same thing as my example before) but as someone who had severe anxiety since childhood, like literally would cry before presentations, being forced to do presentations is what made me slightly less anxious. ofc it's not the same for everyone but almost every job requires presentations and life in general requires you to speak to people and the whole point of recovery is to be able to function a little bit better in life. idk I feel like the purpose gets ignored so much in the name of accomodations. I'm not saying accomodations shouldn't be made (they absolutely should in many cases) , but I feel like being in that fixed mindset that you're life *can't* be changed for the better is such a dangerous idea prevalent on the internet. sorry for this random rant I just needed to get it out lol

omg yessss >:( lets Dis Cus this bc it irks me too and i can’t sleep. to be honest throughout my teenage years i feel like i’ve noticed this very weird mentality just continue to develop online when it comes to mental illness. on the one hand it’s clear that most ppl esp kids can not afford or do not have access to the treatment they need  - like they don’t have any real world support so they just turn to the internet without thinking too much ab it. but because of that it’s a well of misinfo with literally no boundaries or critical thought. there’s definitely this self pitying competitive almost passive aggressive, even infantilizing, aspect to the way the topic is approached. like most therapists will give you these same standard self help techniques - go for a walk, do some meditation, breathing exercises - not to cure the mental disorder but to alleviate the effects of it in the moment. and i think teenagers or even ppl in general just like brushing that off bc it makes them feel like their pain is just simply too unique and deep to be confronted lmfao. also they often make their depression and anxiety a whole personality trait which causes them to take any well intentioned suggestion offered as a personal attack. when it comes to presenting in class, i’m kinda on the fence. i don’t think anyone should be forced, i think it should be a case by case sort of thing. maybe modifying for each individual child’s needs. for example, if a kid is really anxious over presenting in front of the class, the teacher could perhaps allow them to present in front of a smaller group instead so they still get the experience of public speaking without that much pressure, you know? and then they could work on building up to going in front of a bigger crowd bit by bit. i only say that bc i know different ppl respond differently to that sort of thing and i used to miss a lot of school out of pure (mental illness induced) fear which was just overall bad for me LOL. like you said accommodations come in handy when necessary i totally agree w that. anyway yeah like it doesn’t surprise me that a group of ppl dealing with often untreated mental illnesses can’t see any hope/ don’t believe in self improvement, but it’s super harmful rhetoric to spread as a universal truth bc like. the majority of mental illnesses absolutely CAN be controlled and you CAN live a whole healthy life if you learn how to cope with the specific makeup of you own brain. it’s sad to see children thinking they’re beyond help or a lost cause like that’s truly practically never the case :( theyre not even done developing, nothing is final you know. but ig it really feels that way in the moment and i totally understand that so i won’t undermine it. it just sux to see !! and adults should def be more mindful of that :( dw about the rant i gave you one back lmfaooo x

[ancient-bruises-ancient-moon]

ok SO I got an anon I wasn’t gunna respond to but I'm enjoying a vegan chocolate banana cookie dough thc/cbd infused smoothie I invented so fuck it, let’s do this

this isn’t gunna be eloquent at all and I hope what im intending to say comes off correctly. may not, my brain is mush- but here we go!

so last night/technically this morning I reblogged a lot from this brilliant intersexism blog. (highly recommend giving a follow!) which led to...a bizarre ass anon this morning (I'll make another post linking to her blog so ya’ll can follow. she doesn’t need to deal w/ this post after everything else she deals w/ on here- unless u want to ofc!! hi ur cool! ANYWAY...)

I don’t remember the exact wording but it was something like “so ud rather have sex w intersex ppl over trans ppl??”

ummm. I literally never said shit about sex w/ intersex ppl?? like, ever.

was that supposed to be some huge “gotcha!!” ??

‘cause it didn’t work, at all.

1. my body is not a democracy

2. why r ya’ll obsessed w sex as validation

3. ur rly gunna ask me, essentially, if I'd rather be intimate w a deranged narcissistic reality denying manic OR a person with an intersex disorder...and u rly think I'm gunna be like OH NO I’D RATHER HAVE SEX W A MANIAC???

like...it’s rly not ab sex at all but did u RLY think that was gunna work in ur favor somehow?? and if u did, why did u think so? could it be bc u use intersex ppl as pawns for ur arguments but then don’t actually consider them ppl that can be in loving and intimate relationships? do u rly think this is activism? do you feel no shame?? you should be fucking embarrassed. this is so embarrassing for you. 

something ya’ll don’t realize: I worked at a center that offered therapeutic services, std testing, & peer activity groups for lgbtiapqbdsmnlmnop folxxxx

I know how ya’ll speak to your therapists, to your peers when you think no one is listening, I watch ya’ll take credit for things u did NOTHING for, I've watched your violence against anyone who disagrees with you (INCLUDING about tv show characters...like, come on..) Adult trans women using fake IDs to try to get into youth events...and then get MAD AT ME when I have to kick A WHOLE ASS HALF DRESSED MAN GRINDING ON THE FLOOR out of an event for CHILDREN... this is beyond just Tumblr. you’re also like this irl. and often, somehow, even fucking worse.

I had far less intersex clients BUT ya know who wasn’t throwing tantrums, being violent, trying to take credit for things they didn’t do, starting fights, sneaking into events to get near minors?? my intersex clients! NOT ONCE. AND  let’s be real...my intersex clients had good fucking reason to be furious and there were absolutely times that I would not have blamed them in the slightest for slapping tf out of someone...but they didn’t. not once. (ngl tho if they did I would have “not seen” what happened tbh bc I am a very responsible adult lmao- I can say this now bc I left the field so it matters not at all for my career)

ya know who would stay after hours, silently crying in rage bc of the shit trans clients said to them? my intersex clients (the big one was trans ppl telling them they’re lucky they get to ~~choose~~ their sex)

ya know who took the time to use open activist hour to build presentations to teach the LARGELY ENTIRELY INEPT staff (myself included, more below) about intersex issues so the people who come after them can get better help than they were able to receive?? I'll give you one guess. 

I left academia and working in the field w/ ppl bc of my experiences at this place & the direction this tender gender trender shit is taking academia. Intersex people deserve so much fucking better than even having to HEAR this bullshit. I would only go back into the field to work with women & intersex individuals. Probably as a volunteer though, but I digress

I worked there when all these new words were coming out too like demisexual android identified diaper baby or whatever the fuck lmao and the trans clients would be FURIOUS when anyone didn’t know wtf it meant

and in contrast our intersex clients were constantly explaining shit to staff/interns/volunteers about their conditions that they should never have had to explain TO THE PROFESSIONALS WHO WERE THERE TO HELP THEM. and I can’t even lie and pretend I fucking knew much, I didn’t. I was hired without even knowing i’d be working w intersex clients- I just needed to show I knew some trans buzzwords. but I put in the time to learn, I read every book any client recommended, any article they emailed me- but honestly that STILL ISN’T GOOD ENOUGH!!!! I should NOT have been hired!!! MY BOSS should not have been hired!!! Actually, the only staff members that actually deserved their job was an gay intersex man. OT but he was so cool and smart and hilarious and like FUN ANGRY like idk how to explain that better lol he was good at getting u pumped up ab shit & good at getting ppl worked up enough to DO something. The only other staff member who actually cared and knew anything was a lesbian woman (of course) but she had recently had a baby and became so afraid for the welfare of her wife and daughter that she went along w trans shit that she KNEW was delusional and unhealthy bc we SAW these trans clients being violent on the Regular. we were legally obligated to call the cops several times. she wasn’t wrong to be afraid but I do think she should have tried to work elsewhere if she could no longer do her job with integrity but that’s a conversation for another day.

agh im just gunna end this post now bc I can rly go on and on but I'll leave the post with this question that I'd very much like an answer to:

how can we as activists be of better service to our intersex sisters? this issue is becoming more and more pressing and I can’t sit back and do nothing for them anymore. does anyone know of intersex only orgs that need volunteers or have suggestions?? PLS LET ME KNOW. I won’t go back to where I was but there’s GOTTA be SOMETHING I can do for the intersex community. let’s figure it out <3 this issue very seriously needs the attention of radical feminists tbh so...let’s do something.