#and I get to enjoy life without regretting impulsive decisions bcs

[nocturnalbingo]

I’m 19 now hooray another year of surviving in this economy

[da2supremacy]

Rate Your OC

Tagged by @trage-deigh

Meinrad Thorne AKA Rook

Compassion: 10/10 All of the best and worst decisions of their life were made out of compassion. Or compassion induced rage. They're the same thing aren't they?

Bitterness: 2/10 Do they have some regrets in their life? Sure. Over all though Meinrad is pretty content in their lot in life. They're so impulsive they don't have a lot of time for festering bitterness bc the angry is often excised from their person immediately.

Happiness: 8/10 Life is pretty okay, you know? They've got some existential sadness but they're alive and the sun is shining. Life could be a lot worse.

Politeness: 6/10 Politeness gives social interactions a set of rules thus improving them immensely. However. It doesn't exactly come naturally. Meinrad is an eccentric. They may THINK they're following social conventions without actually doing so. They try tho.

Chivalry: 10/10 More rules! About courtesy and kindness and justice and shit. Yeah! They're so into that. They're well aware that the Wardens are not a chivalrous order but if they're part of an army they might as well pretend to follow it.

Pride: 7/10 They're okay. :3 They're pretty good with their hands and fixing stuff. They're nice. They have made age range and occupation typical accomplishments. They aren't very fond of their body but flesh is a prison, you know?

Honesty: 10/10 They're so bad at lying. My god. They can't lie for shit. they don't even try.

Bravery: 5/10 Mienrad is not especially brave by nature. They're really too passive for that. They have night terrors and god everything going on around them is pretty out of their depth. However. They WANT to be braver and they are part of an organization the fights entropy in physical form so they HAVE to be braver.

Recklessness: 10/10 They are so impulsive it's painful. The impulsiveness is how we get around the bravery. Whether it's terror or anger or desperation to see everyone out alive their moments of bravery tend to be moments of thoughtless impulsiveness as well. Very "By the seat of their ass" about everything important or difficult because if they think about it too long it becomes terrifying.

Ambition: 0/10 They literally do not want anything. They're a nightmare to shop for. Just glad to have you around ass motherfucker. They spent so much of their life sacrificing their own needs and desires that they just kind of forgot that they could want things.

Loyalty: 10/10 Mienrad is only in the Wardens bc they literally murdered a man for messing with one of their loved ones. They will kill for you. You don't even need to ask.

Love: 10/10 Mienrad does not feel any emotions by halves. When they're in they're all in. Love? Friendship? Work Colleagues? Did I stutter? All in.

Sense of Family: 7/10 "It's complicated" is probably the best way to describe their relationship with their actual family. They did love them very much but sometimes love isn't enough. Mienrad is, however, such an easy going kinda dude that they really find a "family' wherever they go.

Attractiveness: 7/10 Gotta take points of for the fact that I tried my hardest to make them look like the last time they had a good night's sleep was in 1984 although I don't think I managed to make them look older than their intended 35 years of age. Obviously, though, I find them attractive bc I made them. Wish I could make them obnoxiously blonder though.

Agility: 7/10 I'd say they're about as agile as a melee mage requires but Meinrad has a larger frame and they have a lot of scars that limit their mobility.

Sex Drive: 3/10 Mienrad is an asexual and tbh if they weren't with Emmrich who I imagine is very much NOT an asexual I don't think the fact that they could have sex would even occur to them. Not that they don't enjoy it, it's just not something on the forefront of their mind often. Probably a great way to get their insomniac ass to actually sleep though.

Taggin @bees-bees-fear this time. No obligation to do anything, though.

[vai3r13]

[ JJK matchup exchange w/ -> @frostfall-matches ]

[ raven | afab, any pronouns | 20s | preference for male match, any character is fine as long as they look mostly human ]

- personality: distant, introverted but not shy (disinterested), generally respectful of others but not necessarily kind/sweet, can be a bit fickle and can easily cut people out of my life if they're no longer someone i want to be around, somewhat apathetic (flat affect, rarely has strong emotional reactions, but a majority of the time mood baseline is content/relaxed), calm under pressure, extremely independent, confident and self-secure (sometimes prideful to the point of arrogance), can take criticism well, straightforward (blunt, sometimes tactless/insensitive), tends to laugh off the severity of a situation, not very ambitious, mildly competitive, a moderate risk-taker (often gets a thrill from risky decisions, but tries to avoid lethal situations).

good/broad sense of humor (often more on the playful/absurd side, less so on the sarcasm), calm but playful around friends, very teasing, mischievous, realist that leans optimistic, curious, nosy and loves gossip/drama (but typically doesn't get involved), a natural troublemaker/rulebreaker but also often unintentionally gets into trouble, comfortable with confrontation (often meets heated conflict with a snarky/condescending smile, a bit combative with authority and those who irritate me) but is generally easygoing, even-tempered, intelligent, logical, unsentimental, surprisingly low impulse control (if i want to do/get something, i will simply do it), does not hold onto regrets, good at self-reflection, generally does things out of self-interest but willingly helps others out occasionally.

- personality/alignment types: INTJ-A ; 7w8 ; chaotic neutral.

- love languages: physical touch and gifts. touch reserved for close friends/partners only, willing to initiate affection.

- date activities: cafés, amusement parks, hiking, indoor dates cooking/baking/gaming.

- hobbies: video games (tactics, RPGs, visual novels, anything with good world-building and characters), anime, drawing (digital), painting, baking, cosplay, writing, reading (fantasy, suspense/thriller, psychological, abstract), taking care of houseplants, home/decor DIY projects, hiking, thrill-seeking activities (a bit of an adrenaline junkie).

- likes: cats, sweets, most fruits, good food, cheese, lattes (a favorite of mine is chai), scented candles (can't burn them for long bc i get headaches), piercings, tattoos, puns and lame dad jokes, cool weather, winter, forests, mountains, traveling, new experiences, learning languages (currently knows/studied: english, french, korean, latin), medieval history, having ample amount of alone time/space, the occasional lazy day, the occasional philosophical discussion, a balance between structure and spontaneity, bantering with others, encouraging my friends' bad/risky decisions (i will even do it with them).

- dislikes: dogs, horses, bitter foods, alcohol, strong scents, hot weather, summer, spiders (other bugs are ok), long car rides, feeling restricted, conformity and blind obedience, having to be responsible for others or lead them, being vulnerable, when others are condescending towards me (makes my pride flare up), when others step in to help without me asking, heavy use of sarcasm, pessimism.

- fun facts: quite clumsy, accident prone ; terrible sense of direction ; enjoys skin/hair care, loves changing up hair often ; used to do gymnastics ; a weird mix between a night owl and a morning person (but afternoons are rough) ; able to pick up new skills relatively quickly ; majors in international studies and french in uni w/ minors in psychology and medieval history ; currently working as a scribe ; studied abroad in korea for 5 months and took to long term travel really well ; prone to bad luck but tries to find the humor in most situations.

- appearance/style: 155 cm / 5’1” ; hourglass to pear shaped ; very pale (burns easily) ; round, youthful face ; single dimple on right cheek when smiling ; big green eyes, long eyelashes ; hair is naturally wavy and light ash brown almost always styled with front bangs, currently mid back length and toned silver ; 5 piercings in one ear, 4 + an industrial in the other, and a navel piercing ; clothing style is more on the masculine side (rarely wears dresses/skirts, but i do love short shorts), color scheme is black/gray/muted green ; loves fishnets, flannels, leather jackets, combat boots ; socks are either black or very colorful/patterned ; enjoys sweatpants and hoodies when lounging at home.

Hello Hello! Your matchup is complete @rav--en / @frostfall-matches!!

written in you perspective

barely proofread + English is not my native language

word count - 1.2k

possible tw - talk of narcissism, gambling, past abuse and addiction

And it's...

Fushiguro Tōji !!

To start off, your enneagram types are one of the most common pairings and come with a great deal of similarities and differences. Independence is a quality both of you share and also something both of you deem as important. You can find common ground in both humor and your overall laid-back personality. Toji is someone who shows a few borderline narcissistic qualities, like a lack of empathy, a sense of superiority, and self-centeredness. Yet those same traits are quite situational and more tied to his background than actual narcissism. That doesn’t change the fact that he is not good with people who seek reassurance and constant validation. You being confident fits very well.

When you talk, playful banter and the absurdness in your humor draw Toji closer, just like your rule-breaking and playfulness. As we can see in any of Toji's appearances,  conformity and blind obedience are not his forte either, which is another thing that makes you similar. Your logic and levelheadedness are needed in a relationship with him.

I headcanon Tojis main love language to be acts of service, he doesn’t like making himself vulnerable with words and in his mind actions speak louder than words anyway. He has a great deal of experience in his mercenary work, imagine him fighting off some guy who disturbs you, carrying things for you, etc.

Toji isn't the person for the most typical and romantic relationship, he disappears for days on end, it's a thing that comes both with his job and personality. When he's around tho, I can see him spending lots of time around you. Inviting himself to your place and just accompanying you through your day. Most of your fond experiences with him would be while doing quite mundane tasks. He gambles by betting on horses, while he goes off of feeling I can imagine you taking a very logical approach, that's something he would appreciate, watching you observe every single horse and their traits, eliminating horses one by one to finally decide the one your betting on if you choose to participate in betting too. Going to small restaurants, spending time together in your apartment, etc.

The first time you two went hiking you had to drag him to said location. Toji being just as competitive as you at one point the hike turns into a race of one of you trying to be faster. Toji being very fit and bigger than you wins after a while of speed walking, - borderline running through the trail. He will absolutely tease you about said hike.

Going to amusement parks is fun with Toji and if you want something he will absolutely try and win it for you, after complaining about the prices, on the occasion that he does lose the rigged game he turns up to your apartment the next day with the same thing that you wanted. Just don't ask what happened to the stallholder :)

He gifts you houseplants, as a mercenary he is an excellent observer so he will instantly notice the pots standing around in your apartment. He'll start researching how to care for them and waters them for you if you ever forget.

Watches you play video games, and laughs when you get irritated. If you invite him to play with you he'll tell you "I'm too old for this.", he will still play with you tho. He mostly enjoys combat and the main plot, but doesn't care much for exploration or side plots. Watches you bake, and asks how long it will take until you're finished, he's a big man and will obliterate anything you make, he makes a ranking with everything you've ever baked and he can and will explain the reason for each place, with great detail too.

You liking dad jokes is a must with Toji, once he notices you stifling a chuckle when he slips one out for the first time, he'll most definitely incorporate them in his speech. Toji isn't one for long philosophical speeches in his free time, but he enjoys listening to you discussing the topic, maybe adding his 2 cents once in a while.

"a balance between structure and spontaneity"

Another aspect that makes Toji a very fitting match, is your more logical and rather disinterested personality makes a perfect match with Tojis more emotional and risky side!

Your dislikes align too, like alcohol, hate of conformity, vulnerability, and arrogance. Toji'll tease you about both your bad luck and situations you get into, he won't make it obvious but he's the type to help you while you're not looking. Be it you just about to hit your hand against a corner and him covering it with his hand, or you almost losing some important document. He'll watch you do your skincare, asking you about the products you're using.

Physical aspects he would enjoy would be your height difference. He would show interest in your many piercings too. Toji doesn't care much for style or fashion and he doesn't care what you wear you're gonna be gorgeous for him no matter what you wear and he can fight after all. Your color scheme is similar, so you might even end up wearing similar/ almost partner outfits sometimes. He'll laugh about your colorful socks but will gift you some, with either your favorite character or your favorite food.

While you both fit each other very well there obviously are negative aspects that can't be forgotten in a relationship with Toji. One of those things would be his insane commitment issues or his dealing with past abuse that he still never fully healed from. I can imagine that those things result in occasional outbursts and periods of low-to-no contact with him. Since Toji also has a problem with being vulnerable he won't let himself be helped, not at the start of your relationship at least. He just has to be left alone for a while, in that period your independence and equal need for alone time are part of the reason why you handle each other so well.

Another thing that has to be accepted when in a relationship with Toji is his tough gambling addiction and the way he blows through money. A very tricky aspect of him that will become an important topic at some point in your relationship.

Negatives aside you and Toji would be a very fitting match for each other, in which your negative and positive aspects balance each other and create a strong bond between the two of you.

headcanons

-

Toji taking you out to gamble, and you just watching him or even joining in. You betting on two different horses, he bets off of feeling while you go off of logical aspects like the visible condition of said horses. Finally picking your horse and later on winning! He's just a tiny bit jealous and pissed.

-

Toji teaching you how to shoot a gun just because "It'll make you look like a badass" and he wants you to be safe and able to protect yourself. As you brought up that you're quite quick with learning new things I think that he'll be quite impressed with you.

-

Going out to random small restaurants and trying each other's favorite foods, or trying new ones. He'll absolutely show you his favorite Takoyaki spot.

-

He'll absolutely beat anyone who harasses you to shit, full on dragging said person into an alleyway and bones cracking.

-

I really want hwachae or rice cakes.

Anyway, thank you sm for reading and I hope you could enjoy at least something:)

It was kind of hard for me to match you at first, but after a little thinking, it became pretty clear. My second choice would've been Geto.

I apologize for bad English, it's not my native language.

[youngbeanpole]

A message from BP’s mail-lady

hoo boy here we go. this is gonna be a long post.

hi! im lemon, and i started this blog on april 2nd 2012. and today, april 22nd 2021, im posting beanpole’s last message here. its been one hell of a ride.

how it all started i was 15, spending time on tumblr, when i suddenly started seeing people posting about this movie that was about to be released soon, called the lorax. now, im not american, so i had never really heard of dr seuss, but people were so enthusiastic! so i watched a shitty cam-rip of the movie and joined the fandom. 

and then the askblogs started, the first one i came across being swag, of course. i had run askblogs for other fandoms before, so i wanted to join in on the fun. but regular once-ler was already taken... and green suit once-lers, and audrey and ted too... so i had to come up with something original. 

the movie started with the once-ler leaving home and his family showing just how awful they were, and i started thinking, ‘man, his childhood mustve sucked..’ ‘haha what if i made a blog about once-ler when he was my age?’ 

an impulse decision that somehow gained me 100 followers in a week. somehow relatable tumblr teen once-ler was relatable to 2012 tumblr. who couldve known? 

i get kinda emotional looking back at it, honestly. people were so fun and creative. id stay up late to keep talking to people (bc timezones are hell). and i had a lot of fun just pretending to be a flawed boy, one who seemed nice but could be rather snarky, who would lie and break promises at the drop of a hat, but only because he didnt know any better, not out of malice. and i couldnt have done it without you all. i never wouldve known that he hates tomatoes, or likes celine dion, or wears the same thneed every dang day just because that happened to be his icon. 

was it silly to get obsessed with a childrens movie? maybe. but i had a great time.  (im also happy to see there are still people in the fandom that are carrying on the legacy... you guys rock)

truffula flu i think most people that remember bp remember him from truffula flu’s camp entre, over at youngbeansprout... a blog ive sadly lost the password to. im a big baby so i never thought id enjoy writing about something as scary as zombies, but i saw my friends doing it so i went in blind, without any idea on a backstory for the au or whatever.  ....which is probably why he wasnt always all that prominent in the story, haha. well, that, and timezones. 

it was probably an even wilder time than running this blog was, because there was actual plot. and people would liveblog it. and make fanart. and cosplay??? someone out there? cosplayed my oc to a convention? its one of those things that make you go. huh. i made something cool. probably never gonna reach that high ever again, but it sure is a fond memory. i still have a folder on my computer with all the fanart and it still brings a smile to my face.

also... i never did get to finish zombie au’s story, but i did plan how it would end. so if youve managed to read this far, congratulations! youve hit the hidden deep lore.

---

so the thing with truffula flu was that entre made the trees fucked up, right? and those spores would turn ppl into zombies. and of course you could become a zombie from being bitten, but it also traveled through the air...

everyone in camp entre (who wasnt immune or already infected) wore a gasmask, a bandana, something to cover their mouth. bp, who wandered into the apocalypse by accident, did not. he didnt even know. 

so little by little, the spores gathered in his lungs, until he realized. oh no. im getting sick. oh no. oh no oh no oh no. he messed around audrey’s equipment to confirm he was infected, and he got scared. he was a scared kid and he was going to die.

except. ted had handed him a cure for safe-keeping. a cure bp had sworn to protect with his life. but it could save him, right? in a moment of cowardice, he uses it on himself... only to find out there never was a cure.  (now heres the part where my memory gets fuzzy but) the ‘’’cure’’’ was given to ted, who was already slightly rotting, meant as a mercy kill. the people who gave him the cure assumed he would use it on himself.

except ted was a good kid, who wanted to use the cure to help others. and beanpole? his lies and broken promises came back to bite him in the ass, and he died sudden and alone. the end. :)

ANYWAY

the end of an era ive wanted to wrap this blog up for several years now but i never knew how. younger me wanted to give him a happy ending, which back then i thought was getting him a girlfriend. 

but as i got older, i realized... not everything can be fixed with a relationship. he’d have to learn to overcome his flaws by himself, learn his lesson about honesty and sincerity and the dangers of greed. and then, maybe he’ll have a happy ending.

so as he rides into the sunset on this day, imagine. maybe he’ll end up cutting down a forest and regretting it the rest of his life. maybe he’ll become a rock-star. an inventor. a teacher. a gentleman. a cannibal? okay, maybe not that one or maybe he’ll continue traveling forever, singing songs about boredom.

who knows? there’s infinite possibilites out there.

--

and with that, im logging off too. if you ever need me, ill be over on twitter as his deoncelerized self, bean. 

<3

[arcticrxt]

Some dream smp mbtis and enneagrams bc I love it!!!

@dreamsclock here it is!!

Characters:

Wilbur

Ghostbur

Tommy

Dream

Tubbo

Quackity

Karl

Under the cut bc they’re kinda long. Keep in mind this is the characters and not the content creators :]

WILBUR

Personally for me I’d type c!wilbur as ENFJ which is interesting for a villainous character. When he spirals into madness, you can see his dominant function (Fe) become more unhealthy, leading to him being very manipulative. He shows Ti-grip when his Fe is left to burn out, becoming critical of others and their methods, preferring he do it instead (seen with tommy during their exile). Ni auxiliary is shown in his ambition and drive for his goal of L’manburg.

For his enneagram, i know wilbur said he based c!wilbur off of the song eight by sleeping at last, but hear me out,,, I was thinking maybe a 3w4. The 8 characteristics could be seen in a tritype of 368. Type three is named the achiever which in itself stands for his vision and ambition of L’manburg. 3w4s are often working towards personal growth and professional success. When unhealthy, 3s can get extremely competitive and prone to one-upping others. May reject their sense of self and develop intense mood swings. At worst they can backstab ruthlessly (tommy and the whole of L’manburg and pogtopia) and destroy others reputations solely for their benefit (“if i can’t have this no one can”). The tritype Im a bit if-y on but I’ll say 368 because it focuses on working hard, achieving personal best and developing a winning image. They will want to protect others from those they perceive as a target (dream, Schlatt), they will warn and caution others and seek “worthy” authorities they can respect.

GHOSTBUR His Si is incredibly high so imma say ISFJ. His main motive (id say) is wanting to collect stories of his past and the history of the nation he built, his “unfinished symphony”. Fe auxiliary is very strong as well as he shows a lot of compassion to others, offering them some blue in times of need and also not wanting anyone to feel sadness like he feels it. Ghostbur ignores his own feelings in order for others to feel safe. His Ti is shown through his need for gathering knowledge to understand alivebur and i could also see it through his internalised logic that the blue will help people. Not sure on inferior Ne, maybe through not wanting to see other possibilities in regards to his resurrection, however he was under a lot of stress since his home just got blown up, and friend died, so I can’t blame him.

He clearly doesn’t want conflict so I’ll say type 9. Needs peace and harmony (he gives out blue to help people). Soothing voice, and collected (except when Phil blew up L’manburg but that’s reasonable). He’s complacent, and humble, and will go the extra mile so long as to not rock the boat. Appreciative of the small things in life and enjoy simple pleasures.

TOMMY For Tommy I think ESFP which is probably one of the ones I’m up for more opinions on bc I’m not completely sure of his type. Se as dominant as he thrives on living in the moment but in an unhealthy way (unnecessary conflicts) He’s got a strong Fi auxiliary and you can see that through his personal morals and the way he usually makes decisions based off of emotions rather than objective facts and logical reasoning. He’s good at planning, but not at thinking out the longevity of it. Eg when heady exile and found technos house and lived under there, thinking techno would find him, this all shows Se-Te loop. He gradually develops an unhealthy Fi which leads to him disregarding external relationships (his friendship with tubbo) and commitments to maintain his internal love of the discs.

Enneagram wise, I’m definitely leaning towards 7w6. 7s are usually jumping from one thing to another and are constantly getting bored. The wing 6 brings loyalty and protectiveness. When unhealthy, sevens become narcissistic in their actions and presentation (see his confrontation with tubbo after tubbo thought he was dead, and the “the discs are worth more than you ever were” granted he quickly realises what he said but the mentality was still there).

DREAM I think he’s a fairly obvious stereotype unhealthy ENTJ. He has a very low Fi. When we see him driven by emotion (usually anger) it’s terrifying and we have no context about it at all except that it’s for a need of control. He knows how to manipulate people through his charisma and power in an ENTJ fashion. He lost attachment to his things very quickly (using Te and Ni to go forward logically while also showcasing his inferior Fi)

Dream is a very painfully obvious 8, probably an 8w7, but he is defined an 8. The eight has fiery passions and is usually stubborn and headstrong, they are serious about control over their environment. They are goal-oriented and self-competent. Eights are direct and aren’t shy when taking the lead and making tough decisions. They are often seen in leadership positions. The eight type is part of the “body based” triad and they often act impulsively. They crave respect and enjoy being likes by the group. When unhealthy, eights can become tyrannical and intimidating, scaring off others at first glance. They become addicted to the pursuit of power and will destroy anything blocking their path. Feelings and emotions become insignificant (spirit :’)) challengers become stone-cold and take an antagonist stand to anyone who questions them or their motives. This is the one I’m most most sure of out of every typing I’ve done bc it seems painfully obvious.

TUBBO I’d say probably an Fe dom so maybe ENFJ/ESFP but I’m leaning more to the ENFJ side. Tubbo realised after he thought tommy had died that, without tommy he was himself. Something Fe doms struggle with the most is self worth and personal identity. They’re caught up in wanting to help others that they don’t tend to their own needs. He’s careless and self sacrificing when it comes to the needs of others (him giving up his life so that tommy could have the discs and be happy) and bc he has such low self esteem he doesn’t realise that that’s not what tommy wants. The reason I’m more leaning to ENFJ is because of his inferior Ti. Though he didn’t want to due to dominant Fe, he was lead to believe exiling tommy was the best possible solution. You can see he regrets it after tommy and dream had left. When he was working under schlatt we saw his remorse and guilt even though he knew it had to be done. We see his dominant Fe during his time as president when others push him to do things and he usually agrees. He was manipulated through guilt by dream which is very unhealthy ENFJ.

(I wrote this before the ghostbur one so sorry for any repetitive language) For enneagram, type nine: the peacemaker. Type 9s are motivated by their need for peace and harmony (tubbo was manipulated into believing that getting rid of tommy would achieve this). They have a calm demeanour and are agreeable. They’re hardworking, friendly, and modest but also more serious and diligent than expected. (I’m not too sure on his enneagram which is why this is so short)

QUACKITY Estj imo. Like dream, he’s unhealthily obsessed with power, (unhealthy dominant Te). He abandoned L’manburg because schlatt wouldn’t let him have any say, and he was shoved to the side, despite it being a coalition government. He is very logical and controls others. He makes sure he comes out as the hero and that his hands are clean, learning it from past experiences (Si). He quickly finds ways to get out of situations through the use of tertiary Ne. Doesnt show a lot of Fi and he usually underestimates his opponents abilities and/or strength due to his overconfidence. He’s willing to kill anyone who goes against what he thinks and is stubborn and argumentative. He doesn’t like it when people are lazy and don’t contribute.

Also, similarly to dream, I’d type his enneagram as 8w7. The same with his obsession of power, and his strong/weak mindset where he thinks the world is made up of protectors and those who need to be protected (see him taking it upon himself to execute technoblade for the better of L’manburg) which is all very textbook 8. The opinions of others don’t have much effect on him. Eights are concerned with justice, combating oppression, and protecting the weak. He takes the lead in making tough decisions (he’s the butcher army leader). He becomes more antagonist and villainous with his actions against technoblade, believing he’s in the right. (I didn’t want to just copy out what I said for dream so this is a shortened version)

KARL Torn between ENFP and ESFP but leaning toward ENFP. He’s time travelling because he believes it’s the right the to do which is more so Fi, but could be Fe wanting to help others at his personal cost. But also the Fi-Te pair keeps him going and he won’t stop until it’s fulfilled (which is pretty Te imo). He is creative and good with imagination and ideas (Ne) (at the masquerade, although it was a comical excuse, he came up with minecraft streamer quickly, he was also able to answer billiams questions pretty quickly).

Even though it’s now canon he doesn’t choose when and where he travels to, which would have been a stronger argument for a type seven, he’s still enthusiastic at the times he travels to. He’s optimistic (with the mentality everything will go right for him because he believes it has to, even though he’s loosing a lot of memories atm). He’s got childlike energy and curious eyes. He wants to bounce from one place to another, he created two towns already, although one technically no one knows about gogtopia except for the founders and tommy who travelled through it. He’s well like and popular, which is often a 7 trait. The type 7 is part of the “heart-based” triad, and we can see him act through this with the way he seeks excitement as a means to distract himself from the darker, and more painful things in life. He ignores his fears in favour of positive experiences. For a wing, probably a 7w6 in favour of 7w8, the same as tommy. He’s loyal and a strong leader over being tough and more career-driven. If he was to turn unhealthy in the future, we might see him loose his groundedness, and start to live in a perpetual fantasy instead of reality.

Sorry for any typos or bad grammar :]

[verobatto]

"Break the jar, and do it again." The slow construction of Canon Destiel

Ok people the hiatus is gone and the new chapter aired so we have now time for interesting thoughts…

This is another Destiel meta, sorry again if anyone already talked about this ideas, you can share your opinions here!

We want Destiel become canon. That's law. But how you get together two characters with such defectives inner issues? Like Cas and Dean? Are they ready to be together? I know we are just NEAR to... But we need just a little big step for that...

Before we start to break things here... I want to discuss about one of the most important tool used by Supernatural writers... And bc I like symbolic titles... I'm gonna title it like this...

Supernatural and the Phoenix Complex

Spn must be the most mortal series, and we have memes of our beloved characters's taste for dying over and over again throughout the entire series and reliving in the same season or in the next.

Like the Phoenix, they reborn from their ashes renewed. And that's the meaning from this.: "I'm giving you this so many chances to change your point of view, so you can see with new eyes."

Is the same concept with the breaking point trough lost, pain and tragedy.

Moving this idea to the slow construction of Canon Destiel, we had witnessed how they broke Cas and Dean over and over again, just to develop their characters into a renewed and healthy ones, only in this way, they'd be able to love each other in a plenty way.

So .. let's keep the concept about "breaking the defective jar, to make the jar again." A new one, a better one...

We need new Cas and new Dean, loving themselves, growing in self acceptance and learning about communication.

Ok .. now we're ready for the jam here...

... Let's brake some jars ...

1) Breaking Castiel

Well... We have this millennial Supernatural been with a very hard to break settings. A program that every angel have: Obedience, castity, submission and complete the mission. How do you break a program like that? We need a really good hacker... Maybe one with green eyes? 😹

Godstiel.

Godstiel was the result from a desperate decisions coming from Cas to protect Dean from another Apocalypse. Cas couldn't manage the immensely of having thousands of souls and the hug power corrupted him.

But this traumatic experience didn't help Cas to improve. This experience gave us a depressing Castiel for the following two seasons. So this... Just depressed him deeply.

Human!Cas

Human!Cas was the breaking point for the character. This was the improvement he needed. Being human guide him to a brand new Cas. Changing his perspective about humanity and make him fell more in love with it 😉 if you know what I mean. This was the remarkable, tragic, but blessed situation that brought him to the bottom of himself. Yes. He was broken but still learning and growing. This was good for the character.

Empty!Cas and AUCastiel

Empty!Cas was another very important impulse for the character, at the beginning of the s13, where Cas talking with the Empty, was like "looking himself in the mirror" but not really, was more the meaning of it. Cas faces himself, his fears and feelings, he embraced all of that, and knowing he already was saved, he came back with his family. Closing this meaning by the end of the same season when he faces now AUCastiel, another "looking himself in the mirror" and he embraces his family, the Winchesters. Knowing AUCastiel helped Cas to reconciling with himself. And the meaning of killing that part of him, big development of the character. Cas killed all that lack of emotion, lack of fee will. Now he knows he don't regret chose Dean, humanity, and fell for it. That was huge for him, and prepared us to close his character issues. Now that he can love himself, he could freely love Dean.

But... We still have that miscommunication factor that is the last step. Aaaand the little, tiny big detail that he already confessed his love to Dean and he felt rejected? Well yes... That's bad...

Mourning!Cas

Mourning!Cas, the actual arc, came to sell the character giving him the last lesson trough pain and loose. How this Cas, whom tasted corruption, depression, redemption, humanity, reacts now facing AUMichael!Dean. Facing lost. Facing this "bond in pause" as I mentioned in my other meta, as Dean faced it in s13 with Castiel's death. Well I'm not very sure about if he is into a soldier mode? Or depressing mode? I'm gonna choose the second one... When he talks with Jack and said WE ARE GONNS FIGHT AND GET DEAN BACK AND KILL AU MICHAEL and etc, etc... He is talking with himself, and he is almost in tears... Emotional... He looks more human in his facial expressions. So yes .. Cas is being very human... He miss Dean... The bond is in pause.... Sigh... I hope he become more determined and aggressive to get Dean back... Let's wait and see... But this episode 1 Cas sounded me like... "I just wait here, then" please come back Dean. 🤷 I'm clueless...

2) Breaking Dean

Dean had always the height from being the first born, the obedient son, carrying on his shoulders with the oppressive idea of a toxic masculinity, the responsibility for being the older brother, toxic codependency and last, but not less important, fighting against his repressed feelings and desires. This whole defective jar needs a lot of breaking.

His years in Hell

Well, we have a very heavy past here, Dean have been trough so many traumatic experiences, he had suffer the lost from his father and Sam. The pressure of being responsible of his father death and not being able to save his brother, consumed him I'm despair, and that led him to make that deal with the cross road demon.

Once in hell he breaks... And when he come back, he just talked about it once with Sam. And that's it. Bc Dean .. and here is the big growing up impediment of the character... He's the Master of Disguise.

(And we have symbolism here again, bc Dean loves disguise, we had seen him in many chapters playing with it... He use disguise as an scape for fun... And for self protection. We could said he disguise his body and his feelings... And that's it)

So he pushes all those feelings again deep down his soul. This feelings and trauma doesn't' exist if I don't look at them. I'll be just fine!

So Hell was a traumatic experience, but it didn't improve the character for good. He remains as constipated emotionally as when he started. So... Not good.

Purgatory

I had already talked about how Dean facing his pure and true feelings in this place. This traumatic experience was positive for the character, bc how I said before, in Purgatory Dean realizes that he is in love with Cas when in his soul remains just what was pure in him (without others humans necessities). Maybe he wouldn't use the 'L' word here, he used the "Need" word as a love confession, then he felt rejected by Cas and decided locking his feelings again, but yes... Now he knows.

Yes... Season 8 was good... 😏

The mark of Cain and Demon!Dean

This was very traumatic for Dean and for us! Dean become a monster. Literally. He hit bottom here... A very good breaking point! But again... He continued doing the same "put down the feelings, and everything will be just fine".

The only good thing here was this inner realization...

This is what Dean learns going through that traumatic experience.

Cas showed him that he knew him very well, and even so, he accepted him. That was scary for Dean. That's a feeling he wasn't used to manage.

Something is growing up slowly in his mind, the idea of sharing his life with someone else...

Gif from @veryamooseing blog

I like that seed that was planted and become to release a little bud...

And this idea is settled when Dean felt he was about to change and die. He was a monster that was about to kill his own brother. When he become in what he hated and hunted all his life, he breaks again and in that huge situation, he become to reorder his priorities. Love, family, retirement? Settled down with a hunter? Building Dean' cave and watch movies with Cas?

Mourning!Dean

Dabb's era brought us a recurring fact: Dean goes crazy when Cas isn't in the bunker or don't answer the phone.

We thought wen Cas come back Dean would be able to recognize his feelings for him and maybe... Tell him??? Or change a little about it? But no. What we get after all this mourning was again, the pushing down emotions and more fear. Yes... A disaster! Dean keeps locked into this emotional prison and he can't get out himself for it. He doesn't advance. He is stuck. And now that he's afraid of loosing people he loves (Castiel) and now that he realizes he's in love with Cas... Well more and more fear... Sigh...

Michael!Dean

Well this is so interesting plot and opportunity for Dean's character development. We have AUMichael talking with two people about LOVE, PEACE, PURITY AND SAVE THE WORLD. If this isn not a mirror for Empty!Cas then idk what it is... And yes .. this is AUMichael talking indirectly to Dean...

"You think you want peace? But you bring war all the time with your actions... You think you want Love? But you lock it down and ignore it. You think you have purity in your heart? But you are just lies. You think you save the world? But you can't even save you from your own hate for yourself.

Yes, this is a huge opportunity for Dean to begin once for all to grow up in self acceptance and in love for himself, facing as it was in Purgatory, the purity that remains in his heart and soul. He can reach peace enjoying retirement with Cas and Sam. He can love Cas romantically and he can love his family in a healthy way.

This is the new Dean we are expecting to find through S14. This is the kind of breaking point, phoenix complex, new and improved jar, we were waiting for Dean. Let's see what happens.

So slow, slow, slowly but with sure steps we hope the construction of Destiel Canon wait for us at the end of this journey.

Sorry... This is so large!! Did you really read this mess? I really sorry... But if you did, please feel free to discuss.

I'm tagging for debate...

@magnificent-winged-beast @sactownbrowns3 @lovemesomecas94 @naruhearts @thedogsled @dimples-of-discontent @lykanyouko @mrsaquaman187 @evvvissticante @agusvedder @navajolovesdestiel @destielhoneybee @castiellover20

And everyone who want to discuss!

[svtwish]

❥ ҉   ; yuta | lost in japan

a/n: after much consideration, i’ve finally decided to start writing for nct :-) i recently got way too invested in them & this kinda happened! i hope you enjoy my first nct fic ˃̵ᴗ˂̵ also this isn’t bc yuta is japanese i genuinely thought he’s the type of person to do this

≫ words; 1454

≫ genre; fluff

≫ au; friends-to-lovers!au

≫ pairing; idol!yuta x fem!reader

↳ in which he can’t remember when he last touched you and he suddenly wants to hold you tight.

inspired by; shawn mendes — lost in japan

When was the last time Yuta saw you in person?

He stared at the white ceiling of the NCT dorm, trying to recall how long it’d been since you both had a conversation not over text, but face-to-face.

nakamoto yuta, 09:18 pm

; it’s been really long since i last saw your face

(l/n) (y/n), 09:20 pm

what are you saying, i facetimed you three days ago

nakamoto yuta, 09:20 pm

; no, as in in real life

  i can’t remember when i last heard your voice without the static

(l/n) (y/n), 09:21 pm

nakamoto what are you up to

nakamoto yuta, 09:21 pm

; you’re back in japan, right?

(l/n) (y/n), 09:21 pm

yeah, why

[ all it’d take is one flight we’d be in the same timezone ]

Instantly, he got up from his bunk bed, climbing down the ladder to rummage through the wardrobe.

“What are you doing?” Taeil asked from the comfort of his pillows, raising an eyebrow at the frenzied boy suspiciously.

“I’m going to Japan,” Yuta mumured, pulling out two sets of clothes suited for the season along with a black bag pack.

Taeil’s eyes widened. “You can’t do that.”

“Yes, I can,” he ran off to the toilet to pack a few of his toiletries, coming back to check his phone. “Tomorrow’s a rest day. Japan’s a few hours away. I have time.”

(l/n) (y/n), 09:27 pm

yuta, what are you doing

don’t tell me you’re coming here

[ and i know it sounds crazy

i just wanna see ya

oh, i gotta ask ]

nakamoto yuta, 09:31 pm

; you don’t have any plans tonight, do you

(l/n) (y/n), 09:31 pm

yeah i do it was to sleep

don’t you dare think about coming here

please, you’ll get into huge trouble

nakamoto yuta, 09:32 pm

; too late, i just booked a ticket

“How are you gonna answer to Taeyong? To the manager?” Sicheng looked at Yuta as if he’d gone insane, blocking the exit.

Yuta didn’t reply, just stared at the younger boy, his mind drawing a blank.

“It’s because of Y/N, isn’t it,” Taeil sighed, shaking his head.

“So what if it is?”

“You’re crazy,” Sicheng commented, eyebrows furrowing.

“Yeah, well, I just booked my flight that leaves in two hours, so please move.”

Yuta’s two roommates exchanged looks before coming to a silent conclusion.

“Fine. Just be sure to come back in time,” Taeil threw his pillow at the fellow NCT member, making Yuta flinch.

“We’ll try our best to cover for you, hurry up and go,” his Chinese roommate moved aside, causing a small smile to spread across Yuta’s face.

“Thanks, guys.”

Just before he left the room, Taeil called him one last time.

“Say hi to Y/N for us.”

Yuta smiled at the sound of your name. “Will do.”

[ i could feel the tension

we could cut it with a knife

i know it’s more than just a friendship

i can hear you think bout’ it, yeah ]

nakamoto yuta, 09:47 pm

; yay i got taeil-hyung’s and sicheng’s approval

(l/n) (y/n), 09:48 pm

you still don’t have mine >:(

yuta please go back i don’t want you to get into trouble

nakamoto yuta, 09:48 pm

; i won’t, they’re covering for me

(l/n) (y/n), 09:48 pm

it might not work you dumbass

& i kinda really wanna sleep

turn around and go back home please

nakamoto yuta, 09:49 pm

; i can’t get you off my mind i just want to see you

(l/n) (y/n), 09:49 pm

i’m not your girlfriend, nakamoto

nakamoto yuta, 09:49pm

; we’re not just friends either

Yuta flagged a cab and climbed into the backseat, telling the driver to head to Seoul Incheon Airport.

Three minutes, and still no reply.

[ do i gotta convince you?

that you shouldn’t fall asleep?

it’ll only be a couple hours

and i’m about to leave ]

nakamoto yuta, 09:59 pm

; hey don’t sleep yet

  it’s not even that late

(l/n) (y/n), 10:01 pm

yuta i’m tired

nakamoto yuta, 10:01 pm

; so am i but i’m coming to see you

(l/n) (y/n), 10:05 pm

i didn’t ask you to did i

nakamoto yuta, 10:05 pm

; don’t lie to yourself, you want to see me too

(l/n) (y/n), 10:07 pm

for the love of everything that’s good please turn around and go back home

please, i don’t want you getting into trouble

nakamoto yuta, 10:07 pm

; no

(l/n) (y/n), 10:14 pm

that’s it i’m going to sleep

good night

nakamoto yuta, 10:14 pm

; which hotel are you staying in

 which room

(l/n) (y/n), 10:19

i really hate you right now

hotelbooking_roomnumber.jpg

The Japanese boy smiles as he takes note of your hotel and room number, committing the address and room number to memory before handing the taxi driver the payment and heading to the check-in area of the airport.

(l/n) (y/n), 10:58 pm

have a safe flight, dummy

nakamoto yuta, 10:59 pm

; see u soon

  don’t fall asleep, sleepyhead

(l/n) (y/n), 11:01 pm

just get on the plane already

[ do you got plans tonight?

i was thinking i could fly to your hotel tonight ]

Two and a half hours later, the plane lands in Haneda airport.

“Thank you for flying with Japan Airlines.”

He retrieves his bag from the overhead compartment a little too excitedly, slinging it over his shoulder.

nakamoto yuta, 01:35 am

; i’m half an hour away :)

(l/n) (y/n), 01:37 am

yeah and my eyes are gonna close soon

nakamoto yuta, 01:37 am

; you better not lock me out of your room

(l/n) (y/n), 01:38 am

just get your ass over here

Tucking his phone in his back pocket, he walks off the plane and through immigration with a small bounce in his steps.

[ the only thing i’m thinking ‘bout is you and i

‘cause i can’t get you off my mind ]

nakamoto yuta, 02:00 am

; you’re not asleep, are you?

sorry, the queue for the taxi is really long

(l/n) (y/n), 02:00 am

don’t worry i’m wide awake

i’m re-watching toradora

nakamoto yuta, 02:01 am

; … okay

After ten minutes of being stuck in a long line packed with tourists and locals alike, Yuta manages to get a cab. He says the name of the hotel a little too quickly, watching the moving scenery through the window, wishing the vehicle could go faster.

[ do you got plans tonight?

i was hoping i could get lost in your paradise ]

“Thank you!” Yuta collects his change from the withered old man by the wheel, checking for his belongings before leaving the taxi.

He practically runs through the lobby, not noticing the concierge shooting him an irritated look. Jamming the up button at the elevator, he pulls his phone out for the millionth time that night.

nakamoto yuta, 02:44 am

; i’m coming

(l/n) (y/n), 02:44 am

the door’s open just come in when you’re here

The metal doors of the elevator open with a ding! and Yuta steps in, touching the button with 18 on it.

The number lights up, and suddenly his heart is racing.

[ the only thing i’m thinking ‘bout is you and i

‘cause i can’t get you off my mind ]

His hands are clammy. Will you smile when you see him? What will you be wearing?

Do you miss him as much as he misses you?

The elevator doors open with another ping!, this time a little too soon for his liking. Yuta was starting to regret his impulse decision, nervousness spreading through his body like wildfire.

[ i can’t seem to get you off my mind ]

The lovestruck boy follows the sign and makes a right turn, walking straight ahead while looking out for room number 127.

He notices the door hanging slightly ajar with the help of a doorstopper, the sound of the TV blaring with some anime opening playing.

Closing his eyes, he takes a deep breath before knocking and opening the door, a soft smile playing on his lips when he spots you in an oversized shirt paired with sweatpants, staring at the TV with your head against the pillows.

“Hey,” Yuta breathes, watching as you turn your head and as your lips turn up into a smile that mirrored his.

“Hey.”

He drops his bag onto the floor, kicking off his shoes before striding towards the bed and tackling you into a hug.

You laugh into his shirt, your hands automatically moving to run through his hair.

Relief spreads through his chest, followed by happiness and another not-so-unfamiliar warmth.

“I missed you,” he mumbles into the sheets, lifting himself up a little to get a good look at your face.

His eyes flicker to your lips, and you definitely don’t miss it.

“Just kiss me already, you idiot,” you cup his face, suddenly aware of his body caging you, pinning you onto the comfortable hotel bed. You giggle, noticing Yuta’s face turn red.

He presses his lips onto yours, your hands moving to wrap around his neck with a sigh.

 [ let’s get lost tonight ]

“Ah, Doyoung found out,” the boy comments, scrolling through his messages.

His chest was pressed against your back, his head peering over your shoulder at his phone as you laugh.

“I told you not to come — you’re going to get a beating from them,” you run your fingers over his wrist, glancing at the screen and shaking your head and the angry emoticons sent to Yuta by Doyoung.

“You’re happy I came, though,” Yuta states, and you find that you can’t argue.

“Yeah, okay, I am.”

[ and i can’t seem to get you off my mind ]