#and continued to be until she literally threw herself off the roof of the daily planet like

[all-i-do-is-live-in-daydreams]

I absolutely adore clark omg. so excited at the prospect of working with his crush (*ahem* the love of his life), lois, that he completely blanks over her trying (very obviously and persistently) to get clark and superman in the same room together.

[easnuppa]

Secret feelings

Chapter 6

Seven weeks had gone since they arrived at the colony called Haven, and they had not gotten any closer at coming up with an escape plan. They had silently, and thanks to Rosita and Abeˋs effort, settled down at the colony. She could easily see how more relaxed Daryl had become lately, hard labor and hanging out with the guys now and that made his shoulders less tense and it didn't drive him up the wall to be cooped up in the hotel room with her all the time. Their life together had become somewhat of a routine also, in the morning they slept together, then Daryl went to work, while she ate breakfast at Rositas before she helped Rosita out with her son. Laundry, cleaning and what not, in the afternoon they ate dinner together, in silence, before they either played cards that Abe had provided for them, or she read her book for the umpth time and he helped out maintaining the hotel. Then when it was time for bed they slept together again before they both exhaustedly passed out.

Savannah knew she had no reason to complain, this was what she had dreamed of with Daryl. It was almost like they really were together, except that she knew they weren't, and she knew Daryl had no feelings for her other then the friendship they had formed back with the other group. It felt a bit weird now, they were hardly speaking together, Daryl never looked her in the eyes and she hated forcing him to be trapped with her like this. She stood in the bathroom and stared into her own reflection in the mirror. She pulled the wet washcloth over her face and neck, as she was about to run it over her shoulder and down her arm, she stopped and looked closer. Two dark red spots could be seen on her neck and shoulder and she remembered how Daryl had sucked hard down on her skin as he came this morning. She felt the same familiar flutter in her stomach as she thought about him, god she just could not get enough of the man. She continued to wash herself off and then dried her damp skin with a towel, she then glanced back into the mirror, she had really put on some weight lately, her breasts were fuller, her cheeks where rounder, well at least she was eating more healthy now. She retracted her gaze away before she pulled on her clothes, as she straightened up she was hit by a dizzy spell and had to grab the sink to steady herself. This was the third day she had felt weird, dizzy, exhausted and the nausea that came and went. She shut her eyes and breathed slowly to ride off the wave of nausea. If only they could manage to escape this place, find their own people, then things could go back to how it was at the prison. Maybe then Daryl could find happiness with his true love, Beth. Oh god, she thought, Beth..... How in hell was she gonna be able to look the girl in the eyes after sleeping with Daryl for nearly seven weeks now? It was a nightmare, then another thought popped in her head that made tears well up in her eyes, maybe he was fantasizing about Beth while sleeping with her, maybe that was why he always seemed so ready. Oh god, she felt her heart shatter in her chest, never had she ever felt something like this, something that could only be described as a bottomless sorrow. She stumbled out to the mainroom and crawled into the bed, where she buried herself under the covers and wiped her eyes.

Savannah swatted the annoying hand away that was shaking her and making her mind spin and her stomach to turn, she grunted.

"Savannah, you have to wake up, are you not feeling well, hon?" she recognized Rositas voice. She tried to open her eyes and focus but then she felt the nausea roll over her again. She leaned over the bed and luckily Rosita was fast enough to see what she needed and shoved a trashcan in front of her. She dry heaved into the can before she shakingly laid back on the bed, a cold washcloth was placed on her forehead and she looked up at Rosita and gave her a weak smile. Rosita sat down on the edge of the bed.

"Hon what's the matter?" Savannah pushed her palms over her eyes to stop the tears flow.

"I think I might have food poisoning or stomach flu or something," she said and then shakingly told Rosita about the swine flu epidemic that had happened in the prison a couple of weeks before the governors attack, and how it had killed off a lot of their group before they could get their hands on some antibiotics, Rosita pursed her lips.

"Do you have a sore throat or any flu like symptoms?" Savannah shook her head.

“Has Daryl been puking his guts out these past days?" she shook her head again. Rosita patted her shoulder.

"Then we can at least rule out stomach flu, swine flu and food poisoning, because you and Daryl eat the exact same food," Savannah sighed.

"Then what the hell is wrong with me?" Rosita gave her a warm smile.

"Ok, take a deep breath," Rosita told Savannah, " you told me that you and Daryl are sleeping with each other on a regular basis right, the guards are doing the same with you guys, like they did with me and Abe right?" Savannah blushed slightly and nodded.

"Ok, thought so, how long is it since you had your period?" Savannah bit down on her lip and shrugged.

"I don't know, it has been pretty irregular after the outbreak and all that you know, lack of food, the stress and all that," Rosita nodded and understood what she meant.

"But you have been eating more healthy now, and your daily routines makes everything a little less stressful for you," Savannah frowned up at Rosita, why was her friend talking in such riddles?

"What are you getting at?" she asked a little annoyed and Rosita giggled.

"I think maybe it is time to have a check up with Dr Pete, I think maybe you are pregnant," Savannah blinked and stared at Rosita, she could not be serious, her thoughts from this morning came crashing down in her head, Beth, Daryl. Oh god, what if she was, what would Daryl say, it would ruin his chances with Beth if they ever found their group again. Tears started welling up in her eyes again and she could not hold back the sob.

"Oh god no, it can't be true, I can't be pregnant," Rosita frowned.

"What's the matter honey, I thought it would make you happy? You and Daryl are having a baby, isn’t that what you hoped and dreamed about, you told me only last week, you love him," Savanna angrily wiped the tears away.

"Yeah exactly, I love him, and of course I would love to have his baby, if this whole shit charade was real," she whispered angrily and jumped out of bed and started pacing on the floor. Rositaˋs frown grew deeper.

"What do you mean?" Savannah turned towards her and threw her arms out in frustration.

"Me and Daryl aren't married, we aren't even a couple, we have been buddies in a weird way, best friends at one time back at the prison, then hunting partners at the most, we escaped the prison together so he was stuck with me until we found the rest of the group. There is another chick in our group that Daryl was crazy about, a blonde petite angel called Beth, everyone adored her, she had a heart of gold, gawd, you should have seen him each night, how he would stare longingly at her, or when she was walking Judith, Rickˋs daughter, out in the yard, his eyes was literally glued on her. She too had a thing for him, she always blushed when he was mentioned," Rosita held her hand up to stop Savannahˋs ranting.

"Beth, the one you told me about earlier? The same Beth that was only 18? She might be an angel honey, but Savannah, come on, how old is Daryl? 34-35?" Savannah sighed.

"He is 33," Rosita nodded and got up from the bed.

"Exactly and what can a little innocent, naive 18 year old offer a 33 year old man? A man like Daryl? Iˋve seen how he looks at you, how he watches out for you, honey you have nothing to worry about, he is totally into his hunting buddy, believe me!" Savannah scoffed, what did Rosita know? She did not know Daryl like she did, she had never met Beth.

"Now come on Savannah, there is no point in waiting any longer, I'll take you to dr. Pete and then Iˋll go and get Daryl so you two can sit down and talk," Savannah pulled on her boots and scoffed again.

"Yeah right, Daryl hasn’t said more then two words to me the last seven weeks, itˋs like he went all caveman on me after we started sleeping together. Only a nod, a frown, a scoff or a grunt, that's all I’ve gotten. He will not be thrilled by the news, believe me, he will freak out, you do not know him like I do," Rosita hooked her arm with hers and pulled her out of the room and down a floor until they were standing outside of dr. Peteˋs office door, waiting for the man to open.

Daryl hammered the last nail into the roof he had been working on the last weeks when he was called down by Abe, when his feet was on solid ground he turned to see why he was called down and with Abe stood Agatha and Gregory. Fucking hell what did those dipshits want with him now? Then the anxiety claws gripped around his stomach and his blood almost froze to ice in his veins. Something had happened to Savannah. He looked around to see if he could spot Rosita, he knew how close Abeˋs wife and Savannah had gotten. He forced his feet to walk over to them.

"What?" he asked and looked at Abe, but the man who he had started to consider a friend, just shrugged, he then directed his stare at the council members. Agatha was the one who spoke up first, with a huge smile she reached out a hand to him.

"It seems like congratulations are in order, Mr. Dixon. Pete just officially confirmed the happy news," she said and Daryl just stared at the woman. Had she just hit her head or something? He heard Abe sigh and cut in.

"Thank you both, Agatha and Gregory, Iˋll take it from here, I’m sure you both have more important things to see to, I will help him with the move," Agatha smiled and patted Abeˋs arm.

"Thank you Mr. Ford, we appreciate everything you do for this community. Show Mr. Dixon to cabin five, will you?" Abe nodded and watched the two walk away before he turned to Daryl. Daryl frowned and looked at Abe quizzically.

"The hell was that woman talkin’ about?" Abe placed an arm around Darylˋs shoulders and steered him in the direction of his and Rositaˋs cabin, he pushed Daryl down in one of the chairs out on the porch before he went inside and got his secret stash of whiskey before he joined Daryl. Daryl continued to stare at Abe as a bottle of whiskey was shoved into his hand and coaxed to take a swig.

"Has Savannah said anythin’ about bein’ sick? Have ya seen her being sick?" Daryl felt all color drain from his face but swiftly shook his head.

"Is she sick? Why would those asshats congratulate me if sheˋs sick?" he hated being this confused, Abe just shook his head.

"Nah sheˋs probably fine, well nothing serious at least, just the regular stuff like morning sickness, dizzyspells, you know the delio that follows when a chick get pregnant," Daryl felt like the breath had been kicked out of his lungs and he had to grip the arms on the chair to steady himself. Savannah was knocked up, how the hell had that happened? He shook his head, he knew how, christ he wasn't an ignorant teen afterall, but how and why the hell had this happened now? They were gonna escape this place. He grabbed blindly at the whiskey bottle and tilted his head back as he took a large swig. He felt the liquor burn down his throat, this was a disaster, she didn’t wanna be burdened with his offspring, the Dixon blood and the Dixon curse did not need to be passed on to yet another generation.

"Looks like the sky just fell and crashed in your head there, buddy" Daryl got up from the chair and started pacing back and forth on Abeˋs porch.

"Cause it ain’t fucking good news, now sheˋs fucking stuck with mah sorry ass! She ain't wanna be stuck with a Dixon kid!" Abe sighed and grabbed the bottle of whiskey that hung loosely in Darylˋs hand as he walked by him and took a long swig.

"Well looks like the damage is already done here bud, and you better get your shit together before you go and meet her. One thing I know is how fragile pregnant women are," Daryl suddenly slid down onto the floor like his feet had been kicked out from under him.

"I’ve been a total shit to her for weeks," Abe nodded and handed over the whiskey.

"I know bud, Rosita told me," Daryl glared up at Abe through his bangs, his friend just shrugged.

"You know how chicks talk,"Abe inhaled, "well you can always change that, the woman is crazy about you and I bet my nuts that sheˋs happy that sheˋs gonna have your kid," Daryl scoffed and glanced over to the forest that surrounded their home. Abe got out of his chair and helped Daryl up on his feet.

"Well, we better get you guys installed in cabin number five. It’s going to be dark soon. And Iˋm not gonna miss out on dinner with my girl and kid."

Savannah and Rosita stood in the middle of the room in her and Darylˋs new home, here it was a small kitchen, two bedrooms and a small living room. It was sparsely furnished, but plenty for them to live comfortably. This was all so overwhelming, she had tested positive on the pregnancy test given by the dr, then a guard was summoned to take the news to the council. Although Rosita had offered to go over to the building site to inform Daryl, but was brushed off by immediately, that was not how it was done at the Haven, it was the council's duty to congratulate the father. She had had a sinking feeling in her stomach ever since, she knew Daryl was upset with her and she dreaded when the time came to be alone with him. Rosita had gotten the heads up from the council to show her to her new home. Daryl and Abe had already picked up their few belongings from their room at the hotel and moved it back to the cabin, now they were sitting outside on the porch drinking coffee. The sun had set about an hour ago, and Rosita turned towards Savannah.

"Are you going to be ok on your own now?" she asked and Savannah forced back the tears and hugged her new friend tightly.

"Thank you for supporting me today," she whispered and Rosita gave her a warm smile and squeezed her hand.

"Of course, honey, that is what friends are for," she said before she walked out to her husband and her son. Savannah sunk down on the couch and a tear slipped. As soon as she heard Daryl walk in the front door she hurried to wipe it away before she rushed over to the kitchen.

"You’re probably hungry, Iˋll start on dinner, the council sent over some supplies earlier," Daryl grunted his usual response. She poured some pasta in a pot and put it over the oven, and then she poured some tomato sauce in another pan. She stirred it a bit harshly and drops of tomato sauce splashed on her shirt, she wiped it away with her finger which she stuck in her mouth to suck clean. It did not take long until the food was prepared and she filled two plates and placed them at the table and slid down to her chair, suddenly feeling exhausted again. She hid a yawn with the back of her hand as she picked at her food, Daryl shoved his mouth full as usual, nothing could kill his appetite, it was adorable. She sighed, was better to get this over with, they needed to talk. She knew, well at least she needed to.

"Iˋm sorry Daryl, I didn’t mean for you to find out like that, I swear I didn't know until this morning either, I just thought it was food poisoning or a stomach flu or something," his fork froze mid way up to his mouth, he continued to stare at his food.

"S’ alright," he said and continued eating, she sniffled slightly, he was clearly not happy with any of this.

"Yeah I guess youˋre right, it will be alright, we just have to make the best of it, afterall we fixed the Judith situation just fine back at the prison," she said and a scoff could be heard from Daryl as he finished off his plate. She inhaled sharply, his response hurt her all of a sudden and she cursed the damn hormones inside of her. She stared through blurred eyes onto her plate, she placed the fork down and pushed her plate over at Daryl. This caught Daryl's attention and he looked up at her with quizzical eyes.

"I’m not hungry," she explained, the lump in her throat to big to get any food past it.

"Ya gotta eat Savannah, gotta think about," he paused, "ya know, the kid an all," she just shook her head and got up from her chair.

"Just leave the plates, I'll get them done in the morning, I'm gonna go lay down," she said before he could stop her and briskly walked into the bedroom, sunk down on the bed and buried her face into the pillow so that Daryl would not hear her crying.

Daryl sat on the chair in the dr’s office, his eyes were glued to the floor, he could not look at the sleazy drˋs hands poking and prodding at Savannahˋs now very visible stomach. This was about the eighth check up, Daryl knew it was only a matter of weeks until their kid was born. Where had the time gone? He had really screwed shit up with Savannah, their relationship had not gotten any less strained since the day he found out she was knocked up. Now he wasn’t even sleeping in the bedroom, he did not eat any meals with her at all. He usually stayed out working until past dark, then to just return home, scoop up any cold leftovers and pass out on the couch. He knew that his behaviour was taking a toll on Savannah, it was visible in her dull eyes, silvery eyes that used to sparkle when they were out hunting. It was like he killed her inner light. The reason for his behaviour was guilt, plain and simple. He felt guilty for ruining Savannahˋs life, for tainting her with this thing that grew inside of her, the thing had his blood. He could hardly look at her belly any longer, it was a reminder of his yet again failure.

Every night he woke up panting, a loud yell trapped in his throat, drenched in sweat. Each night he had the same dream, or nightmare was a better word for it. The thing clawing and biting its way out of Savannahˋs stomach, Savannahˋs lifeless body laying on the bed in a pool of crimson red blood. He could hear his dadˋs taunting voice, that the thing was the spawn of satan, that's what the Dixon blood did to you. Savannah had tried to ask him what was up, but he just ran from the questions, how could he explain that the thing inside of her would most likely be the death of her and that it would be his fault? He had tried to talk to Abe about it, in a drunken state, but the ginger haired man had just burst out laughing and told him it was just the first baby anxiety. Everything was going to be fine, he just needed to wait and see. Giggles and laughter interrupted his thoughts and he from better judgement looked over to where Savannah was laying flat on the back on the bed, her shirt pulled up and her stomach. He could clearly see how her stomach was moving, and the bile started rising in his throat. Daryl got out of the chair and swiftly walked out of the door.

Out in the hall he leaned against the wall, gasping for air. His heart was racing, his pulse beating like drums in his ears, sweat dripped into his eyes. He rubbed the heels of his palms in his eyes, if only this was just a part of a very bad dream. One of those dreams that started all hot and heavy and turned into some kind of a twisted sick nightmare, if he could just wake himself up, he would be back at the prison and everything would be back to normal. And he would keep himself as far as possible and his tainted blood away from Savannah. He forced his legs to start working and he more or less stormed out of the hotel and over to the building site. Abe looked at him as he started to climb one of the ladders.

"How did the check up go? " he called out to him, Daryl froze midstep.

"Fine," he growled and continued up to the roof of the second cabin they had started on, he knew he should not be too hard on Abe, he was dealing with his own shit. Their second baby, a little girl had been still born, and because of complications during birth Abe had convinced the council to give his wife some time to heal before they were forced to try for a third baby. Daryl knew that Abe and Rosita were running out of time, life at the Haven was fucked up. How was he supposed to deal, why could not things be as simple as it had been in the prison? They survived, they were happy, or at least content. Now everything was twisted and scary. He was scared shitless, the only good thing about the whole fucked up situation was that the guards left them alone, it gave Savannah her much needed space from him. How she had endured screwing him twice a day for over a month was beyond him, his stomach turned again, and the guilt filled him yet again. He had enjoyed it, he could not lie to himself, he had actually looked forward to each time he could bury himself deep inside of her, touch her and taste her. He cursed himself, he had turned into his sick horndog of a brother, Merle, getting a hard on with just a glimpse of her pale skin. Another proof that he was just as sick as his olˋman and brother. He needed to be ready for when the thing was born, ready to kill it before it could kill the only good in his life, the only other person he actually cared about, Savannah.

"How are you holding up, honey?" Rosita walked into the cabin, Savannah had just finished cleaning up after yet another breakfast she had eaten by herself. She was propped up on the couch with the pillow that Daryl had used the last eight and a half months, his blanket draped around herself. Her lower back was hurting something fierce and her stomach cramped up, but she had felt somewhat of the same type of pain the last three months, so she just reckoned it was normal. She rubbed her stomach as it cramped up again and got rock hard, she had felt her child move around something awful all night, kicking her bladder and spine every five minutes. She just gave Rosita a smile.

"I’m doing just fine," Rosita sat down next to her on the couch and placed her hand on Savannahˋs stomach, it had become a ritual of theirs ever since Rosita had lost her little girl, her friend had taken comfort in Savannahˋs pregnancy. Rosita had given her full attention all through the almost nine months, something Savannah was indescribably grateful for, since Daryl could not seem to stand being in the same room as her.

"Are you sure, sweety?" Rosita asked with sorrow filled eyes, both Rosita and Abe knew of the struggles between herself and Daryl, Rosita had also forced Abe to have a little talk with Daryl, but as usual, the man was as closed off as ever.

"It’s stupid, really. I should be the happiest woman in the world, I’m expecting a baby with the one I love," Rosita sighed and brushed a strand of blonde hair behind Savannahˋs ear.

"No sweety, its not stupid, he is the one acting stupid, one thing is nerves for everything going good, from what you told me happened to Judithˋs mother and what happened to my daughter, but Daryl takes this to a whole other lever, avoiding you, running out of a check up, that is not only nerves," Savannah nodded, what had she expected really? That Daryl would come to terms with her pregnancy and suddenly declare his undying love for her? She scoffed, that shit only happened in fairytales, and this was definitely not one of those cute disney movies. Savannah struggled to push herself off the couch. Damn this was getting difficult, she had gotten so big, Rosita had not been this big on her last month, but the dr had told her that the babyˋs growth was just as expected. Rosita jumped to her feet and supported her side.

"Do you want anything to drink? I made carrot juice this morning," Rosita nodded.

"I can get it sweety, just sit back down," but Savannah shook her head.

"Nah, Iˋll get it, I need to stretch my back. My legs and lower back keeps cramping up, it's starting to get so annoying," and Rosita giggled and nodded knowingly.

"I know sweety, the last months are no walk in the park," Savannah joined in on the giggle.

"I wish the guys could feel how it was," Rosita giggled while Savannah filled two glasses.

"Think of all the cursing and complaining if our guys went through the same thing, can you imagine Daryl and Abe being in labor?" Rosita bursted out into a full laughter and it was so good to see her friend finally smiling so genuinely, but then a soaring pain went down her spine and her stomach cramped up worse then she had ever felt and she could feel something hot and wet pulling down her thighs. She dropped their drinks and the glass shattered around her feet and she had to grab the counter to steady herself, she whimpered from the searing pain. She then turned to Rosita who was carefully stepping over the broken glass on the floor to rub her back.

"I think I just pissed myself," Savannah mumbled, feeling her face heat up in embarrassment, Rosita kept rubbing her back and it felt so nice she could have moaned.

"No sweety, I think your water just broke, I guess the baby is coming," Savannah gasped, her eyes wide in terror.

"No it canˋt be, Iˋm not ready!" Rosita shook her head apologetically.,

"Iˋm sorry to say sweety, the baby doesn’t care if you are ready or not, he or she will come when they are good and ready, and he or she seems to be ready now. Tell you what, I will help you into bed, then I will go fetch Pete, then I will run over to the building site and let Daryl know. Iˋm gonna kick his ass over here whether or not he wants to, he needs to be here when his kid is born," Savannah just nodded and let Rosita lead her into the bedroom and up into the bed. Rosita propped her back up with huge fluffy pillows and helped her out of her sweatpants and panties, Savannah was blushing through it all, she was not used to letting others see her naked, it felt awkward and weird.

The pain had gotten worse as the dr rushed into the room, Rosita was right behind him. Savannahˋs eyes went expectantly to the door, waiting for Daryl to come through it behind Rosita, but as she waited she saw nothing, no Daryl. She looked a bit panicky at Rosita.

"Did you tell Daryl?" she asked, her voice high pitched and at the end it broke from another wave of pain. The dr placed a hand on her shoulder and pushed her back against the pillows.

"Lay back mrs. Dixon, I need to see how far along you are, how long have you felt the pain?" he asked, Savannah breathed heavily through her gritted teeth, annoyed over the fact that Rosita had yet not had answered her question,

“It started last night," she panted, both the dr and Rosita stared at her a bit stunned.

"The contractions started last night? Did you tell Daryl?" another contraction rolled through her body and she literally howled out her pain.

"Pfft" she said finally, when she was able to breathe again, "he ran like he had the devil up his ass at the last check up, do you really think I’m dumb enough to tell him I was in pain? Besides, I thought it was one of those regular things I’ve felt through the last trimester. I had no clue it was contractions! Now where the hell is Daryl?! Did you tell him or not?" she turned her furious eyes at Rosita, who crawled up on what should have been Darylˋs side of the bed.

"Yes, sweety, both he and Abe are on their way, I told them to wash up first, don’t need any filth around the baby," she said and Savannah nodded and was once again pushed back at the pillows. After the dr had given her a quick but thorough check up, he smiled at her.

"This certainly will not take long at all, you are almost fully dilated, if I did not know any better I would think you had done this before," Savannah scoffed, then she felt the urge to get out of bed, the cramps in her back was killing her, she pushed the dr aside and scooted her legs over the edge of the bed.

"Rosita, go get me one of Daryl's shirts, I'm not gonna stand here bare assed for the whole world to see," Rosita hurried out of the room, the woman knew very well where they had their clothes after months helping out with laundry and cleaning. She came flying through the door with one of Daryl's shirts in hand, she helped Savannah get into it. She could not button it up because her stomach was too big, but at least it covered her ass, and she could lean on the windowsill without flashing Rositaˋs husband if he were tempted to peek inside the room.

Another contraction ripped through her body and she cried out loudly, gripping so hard on the windowsill so her arms were shaking. Rosita and the dr placed themselves on each side of her and held her up. When it felt like her legs where giving out underneath her, heavy running footsteps could be heard out in the hall, and Savannah turned her head just in time to see Daryl burst through the door, his eyes looked wild and haunted, his hand was tightly wrapped around a hammer, so tight his knuckles were white, she pushed her hair behind her ear.

"What you doing with that hammer Daryl? Are you planning on beating your kid out of me?" she said and glared at him. His eyes went down to the hammer in his hand, then he looked up and met her eyes again, before he could answer Abe was there, pulling him out of the room.

"Thatˋs right Dixon, do what you do best when I need you the most, fucking asshole!" she yelled after him.

Abe pushed him hard into the wall, and had his shirt balled up in each fist on his chest.

"What the hellˋs wrong with you, bud? Stormin’ in on your woman in labor with your kid with a goddamn hammer, get a grip on yourself!" Daryl just blinked up at Abe, the man was taller then himself.

"Gotta be ready for when that thing comes," Abe slammed him into the wall again.

"What are you talking about, thing? For fucksakes, it is your kid, not a fucking thing," Abe took a breather and let go of Darylˋs shirt and forced the hammer out of Daryls death grip. Another scream went through the silence of the cabin, followed by a string of loud curses directed at Daryl. He slid down against the wall and pulled his knees up, Abe let out a short laugh.

"You better polish that nutsack of yours to get back in to her good graces, bud," Daryl looked up at Abe, he shook his head.

"I screwed up, she ain’t never gonna forgive me," he mumbled and he felt Abe sliding down next to him, nudging one of his knees,

"From what I’ve seen of Savannah, sheˋs a good woman, reasonable even, if you lay the shit out for her, I’m sure she will forgive your stupid ass," The door to the bedroom flew open and Rosita ran out of the room, hurrying over to their bathroom, both of them looked after her with worried eyes, she was running back after only a couple of minutes later with a bucket of water and a load of towels. Daryl looked frantically at Abe and Abe took the hint to call after Rosita before she disappeared into the bedroom again.

"Gorgeous, are everythin’ alright?" Rosita turned and glared at them.

"Yeah, peachy," she said and blew Abe a kiss. Daryl leaned his head back against the wall and squeezed his eyes shut as another wail reached out to them. He couldn't believe what an idiot he was, then suddenly a weak cry reached them, it was not Savannahˋs voice. Daryl snapped towards the bedroom door and he was up at his feet in an instant. His legs moved on their own and he found himself standing in front of the closed bedroom door, but he couldn't get himself to open the door, Abe was at his side and placed a calming hand on his shoulder.

"Sounds like your kidˋs got a healthy pair of lungs, congrats, bud," he felt Abe squeezed his shoulder. He didn’t know what to say or think. His kid was born, and it was alive, the kid was alive, but what about Savannah? He strained his ears, but could only hear the kid crying, the panic was back, was she dead? Had she died like Lori? He felt his legs buckle beneath him and felt Abeˋs arms around his shoulders steadying him, he heard Abeˋs voice, saying something to him, but he could not make out the words in the haze. Then the door opened and the dr walked out. He stopped in front of Daryl and reached out his hand

"Congratulation Mr. Dixon, itˋs a boy, healthy and strong," Daryl just stared at the outreached hand, but did not attempt to reach out his own hand, he was in shock, he had a healthy boy, but Savannah was gone. Had the dr ended her or was it Rosita, or did they leave that for him to do? How could he, he knew what he had said in the past, but this was Savannah, the only person that had been there for him through thick and thin. She was by his side when he had to put Merle out of his misery, she had silently given him her never ending strength. Then Rosita was in front of him, giving him a trying smile, he had no clue where the dr had gone, but he was lost in his own head. "Do you want to come in and meet your son, Daryl?" he heard Rosita ask, and Abe gave him a little nudge forward, but he placed his hands at the doorframe and shook his head.

"I canˋt, I canˋt do it," he stuttered frantically, he could not go in there and see Savannahˋs dead body laying in a pool of fresh blood, watching her turn into a walker. He didn’t have the strength to end her, if she went then he would join her, he would let her corpse sink its teeth into his flesh. He did not deserve to still be here when she was gone, where was that fucking hammer when he needed it? Somebody needed to bash his head in.

"Get your stubborn ass in here, Daryl, and meet your son, I swear to god if you don’t..." the threat was left unsaid, but he heard her voice clear as day, walkers didn’t talk. She was alive. He almost ran over Rositaˋs small frame on his way into the bedroom. He hurried over by her side and sunk down on his knees as he grabbed her warm hand and pressed it against his cheek, burying his head into her side, mumbling over and over "yer alive, yer alive," he heard her snort a short laugh.

"Course I am, youˋre not the only stubborn ass, Dixon, I thought you knew me better," she pulled her hand out of his grip and brushed his hair out of his face. He looked up at her, her face was red and she looked exhausted, her forehead and neck sweaty, her long hair a mess sticking to her forehead. She was wearing his shirt, although it was open, she was still covered by bundle laying in her arm, close to her chest. He felt Rosita lay a hand on his arm, he glanced up at her, but his eyes went straight back to Savannah.

"Take a seat and Iˋll hand him over to you," he met Savannahˋs now sparkling eyes, the light was back in them and he felt the fear that had filled his inside evaporate. She gave him a nod and he slid onto the floor against the wall, and watched as Rosita lifted the little bundle out of Savannahˋs arms and moved over to him. She squatted down next to him, she carefully placed the featherlight bundle in his waiting arms and pushed the blanket aside so the little face appeared. His blue eyes were glued to the little thing in his arms, he remembered the feeling holding Judith for the first time, but this was different, this was more of an earthmoving feeling. His heart was filled with an unrecognizable feeling, it warmed his insides. The little bundle opened his eyes and stared up at him, his eyes were the same shade of blue as his own, he let his thumb run along the soft skin on his cheek, and pushed the blanket further back, brown hair as soft as silk could be spotted on his son's head. He was definitely his son, not that he had ever doubted the fact. The little bundle started squirming in his hold, his little mouth started to search for food, when he could not find what he was searching for and did not smell his mother he let out a frustrated snort, and Daryl could not hold back the happy laughter that bubbled up his throat. Oh yeah, he was definitely a little Dixon. Rosita was there in an instant, lifting up the little bundle.

"Looks like the little fella needs his mommy," he watched as the little woman expertly placed his son against Savannahˋs breast. He crawled closer to the bed, mesmerized by the sight of Savannah feeding their son, he had never seen anything so peaceful, something more beautiful. He did not register Abe and Rosita taking their leave, but Savannah as always was on top of things and waved to them, before she choked back a yawn with the back of her hand. He saw her nudge her head against the empty space next to her on the bed.

"You can come join us up here Daryl, you donˋt have to sit on the floor, just take those dirty boots off, I doubt I’ll have time to change the sheets on the bed the next few days," he did not have to be told twice and he kicked his boots off as he crawled up onto the bed. They sat in silence watching the little boy, it did not take long until the little boy was sound asleep. Daryl cleared his throat that suddenly felt thick, and he noticed something wet on his cheeks, he dragged his hands over his face before he looked over at Savannah.

"I’ve been a real asshat, haven't I?" he didn't exactly need to ask, he knew the answer to the question, Savannah hummed agreeingly.

"I could have used your support throughout these months, it has been pretty lonely, especially since I didn’t know why you were acting like that," Daryl felt his ears heat up and he started chewing on this thumb.

"I was shit scared to be honest," he then admitted, "every night I had nightmares of the kid dying and turning inside of ya, killing ya, I just..." he let his breath out slowly, "I was just so scared that what happened to Lori, would happen to ya too," he felt how Savannah slid down and leaned her head against his shoulder, another yawn and she sighed.

"I’m fine Daryl, as you can see for yourself, all I need now is my friend back," she said before her eyes closed and she fell asleep. He watched her sleep for a while before he carefully pushed her head back against the pillow, he brushed a stray blonde hair from her forehead and leaned down and kissed her now cool forehead. He carefully lifted the bundle of his son out of Savannahˋs arms and scooted off the bed and took the two steps over to the crib that was placed in their bedroom, he carefully placed down the little boy. He stood still and just stared at the sleeping form of his son, then he sighed.

"I haven't really been there and helped yer mama through these months, so the least I can do is give ya a name, and don't worry, ain't gonna give ya a hick name that the other kids gonna tease ya about, itˋs bad enough that yer last name will be Dixon. Lucky for ya, ya got yer moma's blood running through yer veins too, prolly what’s gonna save ya, cause yer moma, she’s somethin’ special. Yer one lucky lil guy, ya know that? So I was thinkin maybe Dean is a good name for ya, Dean Dixon, that has a good ring to it, dontˋcha think?" he kept his voice to a low murmur not to wake the now two most important people in his life, his mission in life now was to protect these two with his life, even if Savannah only saw him as a friend and hunting partner.To him she was his queen, and he would spend the rest of his days on this earth to serve her.

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