#and i can't accept it anymore when i call my mom and she proceeds to tell me all the things i spat at myself when i was depressed

[schizochasm]

I went to the store.

My mom sent me 100sek less than she said. So I had to cut some stuff and accept that I'll not have money for the rest of the week.

I still got 2 6packs though. Cause if I hadn't I would've been even worse off.

I was supposed to start watching SVU while waiting for the bus, but my friend called. They were very upset, but at least it saved me from watching it.

Rant about him and my life

TW: (sc1de talk, abuser, hopelessness, and just horrific shit tbh. Proceed at your own risk.)

Once I got home I smoked 2 ciggies in the bathroom venting at him. About how I don't even care anymore and if I had the money I wouldn't talk to anyone anymore. And just let go of what I "need to do" to keep my life together. Just isolate and go back to being g drunk 24/7. Cause I just don't care anymore.

And I told him how I feel about him. How much I hate him etc. even though I know he knows. He's in my head. He knows all of what I think and feel. More than I do sometimes.

I just needed it said.

That's when I made my last post.

After that it was time to watch fucking SVU.

And I'm not even through episode 1 and already hate him for it. And myself.

I can't. I can't cope.

I hate myself for getting this way. For being sick. For being schizophrenic.

And for not listening to him when I should've.

I hate him for ruining my entire life ever since I first met him. Especially after I got sicker years ago and he came back.

But everyone keeps saying he's technically me. He's part of me. He's from my brain.

But he may be from my brain. But he's not me. Fuck that. He's not me. He's nothing like me and he's just horrific terrible scum.

Yet I can barely muster being mad at him anymore.

It's been years. Years.

I'm more submitted, broken, and scared than angry.

That anger, fight, and animosity... It's almost all gone...

He broke me long ago.

And it only got worse over time.

I'm not even one cohesive identity anymore. Not to me.

I'm broken.

And people with abusers that "are real" can escape. There's hope. Somewhere in there you might escape. It might end one day.

But me with my "not real" abuser doesn't get that. For about 2 years I held on to hope.

"One day it'll all get better." And similar. I heard it so much I believed it deep down. That one day maybe it'll all end.

One day he'll stop. He'll go away again and I can start healing and making a life.

I don't have hope anymore.

Not anymore.

It's been at Least 2.5y.

At Least.

I suck at keeping track.

You break.

You fold.

You lose hope.

I can't run. He's in my head.

I can't go to the cops or a shelter. He's in my head.

The meds aren't enough to make it stop. (Maybe if I had a decent dr it could've worked.)

Therapy can't help me cause I'm Currently being controlled and abused, in every category of abuse.

I wish I were dead.

I wish I could k1ll myself.

But my younger brother died 2 years ago.

And since then I don't have it in me to k1ll myself.

Can't do that to my mom and brother. They can't lose us both.

So I'm stuck living.

In a hell scape that people want to just brush off and ignore. Cause to them it's not real. To them it doesn't matter.

It's real to me.

I experience it as if it were real.

But they don't treat me like that's what I'm dealing with.

And I can't even tell them outright myself.

Cause he won't allow me to talk about it. They know. More or less depending on who. But they don't treat it like that's the case. And they never will.

Cause they can't see the scars, rope burns, rashes, cuts, brandings...

They can't see him. Hey can't hear him.

It's not real to them.

It's not the same to them as if it were in shared reality.

I just wanna die.

I just want out.

I don't have a life to hold onto.

I'm just doing it cause I Have to.

Sorry for the rant....

I just....

I wish I could kms...

Maybe one day I'll mercy k1ll myself ...

Maybe one day....,

[batemanofficial]

time for everybody's favorite semiannual tradition: Jaime Bitches and Dithers About His Mother

fair warning this is just my stream of consciousness so it may be nonsensical and meandering but you knew what you signed up for when you clicked the readmore tbh so proceed at your peril

so real jaimeheads know how my mother is, but for those who don't let's suffice it to say that she is what i might call a "hands off" parent. it was made very clear to me throughout my childhood that my mother did not like children - just, like, as a concept - and only had me because she felt like she had to and/or as an experiment in animal husbandry.

now you may be thinking: "jaime, that sounds really harsh! surely you know your mom loves you." and you're right. i'm sure she does, in her way. but she does not like me, and she does not care to shield me from that reality. i don't know if it's because of something i've done, the fact that the reality of raising me diverted from her expectations due to the extenuating medical circumstances that defined my childhood, or just the simple reality that i possess the requisite chutzpah to tell her to fuck off when necessary, or some combination thereof, but the fact remains: she doesn't like me. simple as.

when i was a kid she always made it clear that i was not to grow up to be "weak" or the place any emphasis on my emotional wellbeing over my ability to reason independently, which has had the deleterious effect on my mental health that you might imagine, so im not going to dredge all that up just for the sake of airing my dirty laundry. but i will say that as a result of being raised with these imperatives, its still very difficult for me to articulate my emotions beyond "i feel bad about xyz" because i always equated "feeling bad" with being overwrought and weak and diverting my energy away from the things that needed to be done in order to allow myself to wallow.

all of the above considered, as ive been living with my parents again after college, it's all been grating on me in a way that i don't feel is sustainable anymore. i don't know if it's the fact that im medicated and can see things a little more clearly, or if living on my own for so long has given me a little more of an objective lens on this sort of thing, but ive noticed that every time i talk to my mom about something that's important to me (and im using the term "important" kind of loosely here, just insofar as whatever im talking to her about has some kind of bearing on my day to day) she either doesn't react at all or reacts with an affect that i can only describe as a combination of mild disgust and confusion. either way, she'll forget what ive said entirely by the end of the conversation. my mother is, without hyperbole, the single most self-absorbed person i've ever met.

i think people are fundamentally selfish at the end of the day, for good or for bad, but my mom just won't engage with anything that doesn't serve her. at this point, i don't feel like i can reach her on any level anymore, which is really what's bothering me. like i used to be able to at least make her mad, if nothing else, but now i just feel like an even bigger inconvenience to her than ive ever been. it's one thing to say i don't care what she thinks of me, and on a purely philosophical level i don't, but like on a purely gut-feeling level it does still hurt my feelings! but i don't feel like i can say that to her in any constructive way because she just doesn't accept that as a valid concern.

anyway. i hate that i can't achieve even a baseline level of emotional intelligence while in proximity to my mom. i just want my mom to be my mom, but the closest she can get is pretending to care and that sucks!!!! it coheres. it fucking coheres doesn't it. UGH

[la0hu]

really pissed off at my mom. i called her yesterday for the first time in a couple weeks. she brought up the will smith oscars thing, and we got into this intense argument over it and i literally had to tell her "i don't want to talk about this anymore because this actually seriously upsets me for all the reasons i already told you. and i'm upset with you over this thing that you brought up." then we talked some about miles and what he got on the ACT, and mom was like "i didn't show my disappointment, i just didn't say anything," and i was like "mom, obviously you reacting to his score by literally saying nothing about it is clearly showing disapproval. why didn't you say something encouraging or tell him it's a good score?" and she said "but it wasn't a good score" like 1) untrue imo and 2) that's literally not the fucking point. then we started talking about my dating life and she kept advising me to not expect to find someone who "agrees with me on everything." and then i explained that obviously i'm not that fucking immature and there's also a difference between a guy not agreeing with my opinion on death of the author and a guy not agreeing with my opinion on something like blacklivesmatter. then she started trying to say like "well you are still very immature and this is a major reason why, because you can't handle people who have different opinions than you" and i cut her off and said, no actually i don't accept that, because i literally am the one out of my friends most likely to be open to people that my friends would ignore or disdain on principle. then when i mentioned that i was talking to some guys from hinge and trying to see how the conversation goes, she tells me actually i'm being childish for that too, because actually she never could talk at length with dad about anything and occasionally he says shit she doesn't like, but they had a functional marriage. and i was like "have you considered that maybe, maybe i could find someone who i like talking to, who is also physically attractive and kind?" and then i pointed out that i LITERALLY live with three prime examples of straight couples where the man is actually a good interesting person. like just because anna found a man who's hot and rich but with whom she can't talk about anything, and he's also lazy and inconsiderate to boot -- just bc she fucked up doesn't mean i'm gonna settle for that. i really @'d her too, i was like "growing up having only you and dad's relationship to reference, and then having anna and mike's as reference honestly made me wonder if relationships were just never going to feel as fulfilling or good as friendships." i literally said that. like i'm not taking the most batshit criticism from a woman who married a man she can't talk to, and i also don't give a shit what my older sister has to say either, because she married a man she can't talk to who ALSO is a useless inconsiderate piece of shit on top of being boring. like i'd rather die alone thanks

[heartxclouds]

Diabolik Lovers: Wrong Blood-Prisonned Bridal;;Part 1

[C]♡. Hello! Welcome to this blog..

This is my first try on writting my DL AU, which is called Wrong Blood-Prisonned Bridal if you are new to it! I think that I am experienced enough in writting so this is why I took the courage to write it! I do hope that you enjoy and follow the instructions clearly because yes, I have a rules in here- It isn't forced but you still need to view the rules. 📄

Rules;; {+ Instructions}

If you click on a OST link, you can hear the music ^^

When something is written in italic, it means that it's a wisper.

I would appreciate it if you have enjoyed the story, that you comment or like! Like that it makes me want to continue! If you need to give me constructive critism please send me a PM (Private Message).

In here there will be some spooky things so if you dislike that a lot, please proceed with caution. PS: Niko is a gypsy, that isn't meant as a slur. Niko is a girl that travels, does fortune telling and dances. So don't worry. I'm not here to offend.

If you see a edit with subtitles, read the subtitles! And if you can't see a image clear? Click on it!

Some edits are old or come from friends! I will credit them don't worry, they will be credited in the section 'Information'. And for the old edits, I'll put old in the end of the post in section 'Iformation'.

Thank you for reading the rules! I hope you enjoy this now. 🎃🍂

...

It was afternoon, at this time.. Many kids were playing. Screams of joy because of hide and seek, sometimes pain because they fell and even tears or joy because they were laughing so much. But there was one little girl that wasn't in the mood for playing. She would rather read books at this time of the day, she had secretly picked out some books out of the small library of her mother. Vampires..What were they? Monsters- Bloodsuckers- Creatures of the night... The little gypsy girl was amazed by these stories but also terrified. Welcome to the world of the small Niko Riverdale.

Winter.. It was cold but fun, Niko turned six years old not long ago. She felt like she could be a adult any second. Niko loved to play as the little adult.. But to be honest, it was scary. People always had some type of disgusted look when they spotted a gypsy, and it was like this everywhere. But on the possitieve side.. Some people could be nice and accept them, even enjoy they're dances. A gypsy was never meant to have a bad view.. Being a gypsy was seen as some kind of culture too. The priest always said that God hates gypsy's.. That if you were one, that a spirit will haunt you.. Kill you.. Destroy you. All kids from Niko's age knew the dark reality already, God? Hah.. When did God help? That's what they were thinking.. But Niko thought otherwise, she believes that God is good.

-"Mom.. Why do people hate us?"

Niko was holding the hand of her mother while they were walking back home. Reading hour was finished and Niko had hidden those vampire themed books in her bag before her mother got to see it.

-"Ah.. Don't worry about that honey.. You know.. In this world there are people that can hate you without a good reason.. That is why we need to be strong."

Her mother had felt some un-easy feeling.. Excactly, why did people hate them? She didn't know the answer herself... She held the hand of her daughter slightly tighter, they would go to the cathedral before getting back home. She entered the building and went to the small praying spot that was there. She looked at her daughter, she would need to pick a different one.. Niko went to the Maria statue that wasn't too far away from her mother.

-"My God.. I'm here to ask you questions.. I hope that I don't bother you at this moment but..Do you hate me? Or my mom..? My gypsy people..? You know.. Today some kids didn't want to play with me.. They're parents didn't want that.. Even if it was my birtday.. Hmph.. And God, I'm 6 years old now.. That's a lot, right? Hehe.. Will you please answer me..? I now pray this in the name of our saviour. Amen.."

Niko did the quick cross sign before walking back to her mother, that seemed to have finished her praying. Niko held the hand of her mother.. Did God hear her? Will she get the message..? Who knows.. Maybe God, had a surprise.

After getting home, having dinner and having a bath.. Niko was relaxed and ready to read some more about the nocturnal horror creatures.. Curiousity really killed the cat.. And Niko was clearly the cat in this example. The moon was up.. The beautifull blue moon that shinned in Niko's room, Niko could observe those beautifull night skies forever.. She didn't realise that is was already 2 AM, Niko would be in trouble if her parents found out that she was still up.

{[OST|https://youtu.be/9xWi_RkqYiM]}

But strangely a sound ruined the silence.. Crying.. Rather disturbing. A fenale voice? Calling out for help but it all sounded like a echo. For a kid this could be creepy looking, but for Niko.. She was worried.. Not about that sudden visit in her house of a crying voice but she was actually concerned about the feelings of the person.. Did they need to escape? Was there a killer outside? No.. Not at all. Niko got out her room and walked down the hallway.. The wood plancs made a creak sound. The more Niko approached.. The more the crying became louder. She could see now.

A woman with pretty long white hair was sitting on her knees on the floor. Her clothing was white too- She also had some kind of long blue see-through scarf, she also had white gloves, pretty ones that people always wore when they were from a rich family.. Her skin was pale, as pale as porcelin.

-"Umm.. Miss..? What's wrong? What is happening..? Are you hurt..?"

Niko was a child with good manners but it was kinda weird.. How did that woman come in? The door was locked, the windows too.. Who was this woman? Or what is she? The crying didn't stop but when Niko placed her hand on the shoulder of the beauty, then she turned around and held Niko's shoulders tightly.

-"Where is h-he?! WHERE IS HE?! I NEED HIM-?! MY CHILD.. HAVE YOU SEEN MY CHILD?! AHHHH!!!? I WANT HIM BACK! I WANT HIM BACK?! HE NEEDS TO BE FIXED.. HE NEEDS TO BE HAPPY!! WHERE IS HE?! AHHH?!!?? TELL-?! TELL MEEEE AAHHHH!?!"

Niko felt paralyzed.. A random woman just came here and was finding her child.. Her child is broken? He needs to be fixed? That woman didn't look normal at all either.. She was way too pale for a human being.. It was dead skin colour.. She had long fangs too.. And also you could see through her..? A ghost-? A spirit?! Niko's eyes were tearing up- God, can God explain?! Why don't Niko's parents hear this?! Was she crazy?! Niko just got out the grip and ran to her room and locked it, she got on her bed and hid under the covers.

-"God please.. Make it stop.. Make it stop.. I'm scared.. Don't give me to Satan.. Not the devil, I beg you.. Do you hate me? Is this my curse now?"

This was a bad experience for a child, it could be traumatizing.. Niko was praying for this to stop, but then she heard the loud banging against her door- She was screamed.. The woman was still crying and screaming.

-"FIX HIM?! YOU CAN FIX HIM!! FIND HIM!! YOU MUST FIND HIM!?? DO IT PLEASE!!!"

Niko hugged her knees, she was way too scared to say anything or open the door. Niko cried in her sleep.. In the background she could still hear the crying.. The crying of a female vampire ghost..

...

[{OST}|https://youtu.be/NvMROvgMOz0]

[C]...

It was night time, a few nights have passed since that incident and that woman always kept her awake- Screaming and crying.. Niko was hidding under the covers- Hoping that it would stop soon. She held her bunny plush close, it was a white bunny with red buttons as eyes.. It clearly was a old design, but she loves it. The banging on the door soon stopped.. But it replaced with a wisper. Was Niko getting crazy? Hearing wispers in her head.. That made Niko just hug her plush tighter.

-"Go to the forest.. In the forest you'll find a mansion.. I need you to fix him.. Please"

Niko looked down- She letted out a sigh.. Even if her parents forbid her to go out at night- She would do it- Like that the nights without sleep will stop..Maybe. Niko puts on her small brown boots and then got out the house after grabbing her plushie and wearing a yellow jacket, it matched her eyes perfectly. Now, Niko got in the dark forest.. Why did she forget the flashlight?? She hugged her plush tighter.

-"It's you and me mister carrots.. We will finish this.."

You could hear in Niko's voice that she was scared- She planned to get back home and get the flashlight.. But it already was too late- Her house wasn't visible anymore. Was she lost-? Niko started to tear up, she felt stressed and she could sense that there was danger close by. Niko didn't trust the sound of breaking twigs and leafes that were being crushed.. Without further hesitation, she started to run- She didn't care that she could see nothing- Her mind told her to run. And she was lucky that she started running now, because the hungry wolves were out now, howling and groaning, they wanted the eady prey that was there now.. And the prey was Niko. A girl her size and her age was as easy as catching a mouse.

{ [Wolf howling|https://youtu.be/66HKBdZe_WA]}

-"HELP!! PLEASE SOMEBODY!! WOLVES!! HELP!!"

Niko was screaming while running- But nobody was there to save her- But God must have heard her wish.. The mansion- It was there- Right infront of her! Niko quickly openned the door and got in. She heard the wolves outside, they were howling and sniffing where she was hidding. There was a moment of silence soon.. Were they gone? Niko peeked through the window to see if those carnivores were still there and it seemed that they dessapeared.

-"Hehe!! No dinner for you guys!"

Niko giggled happily, she was happy to stay alive- But soon after her short victory dance, she felt something.. No.. Someone behind her- She gulped and then slowly turned her head to see a tall man.. His eyes were some type of dark pink and his hair was purple- He also was wearing glasses. Niko stepped back as her eyes were wide from how scared she was- Will he hurt her..?

-"Entering the house of someone like that is really dissrespectfull. You need to learn some manners."

The male was getting straight to the point- His expression was serious and he clearly wasn't happy with Niko's action from before. Niko quickly openned the door and ran out- This was unexpected. She never knew that someone lived there.. No wonder that it looked so clean.

The man with glasses sighed as he watched a albino with the corner ofhis eye.

-"Oh.. So you did decide to come for dinner. I am waiting for your apologize. The dinner is cold and everyone is back to their rooms."

The purple haired man walked away, slightly annoyed. He puts his gloves on in a more comfortable manner as he was walking. The albino narrowed his eyebrows as he gave off a 'tch' noise, he just got back from the garden not long ago. Who was that girl though? How did she find this hidden mansion? He wondered.. But he won't think about it too much. He went to the dinning room.

Meanwhile, Niko had ran away from the mansion.. Fear was described in her eyes. But then- Her house, she saw it.. And yet, she didn't run far away from the mansion. Magic? How? She turned around.. Only trees were seen. How in the world? The small brunnette ran quickly to her home and her parents waited for her.. Crying tears of relief and ordering her to never ever do that again but.. Will she keep that promise-?

✧.*ೃ༄9 Years later...

The sound of the flutes and tambourines filled the streets, the gypsy's were there.. And it seemed that Niko and her sisters were the ones to dance. The same thing happened once again, for some the disgusted look and for some others there was the look of enjoyement. The gypsies how flexible and gracious moves- They always had a beautifull performance in mind. After the dance performance, niko and her sisters earned some money.. They will use this for food and clothing... And for Niko's mother, Rei. She was doing fortune telling to get money for the small house that they have.

The golden eyes of the brunnette spotted a animal..A cat..A white one to be specefic. She stared at it for quite a while- The cat looked at Niko and purred before walking away. Niko sighed a bit as she furrowed her eyebrows. Then Niko realised that her siblings were already going back home- She better quickly catch up with them.. Niko openned the door of the house and watched her father, he was laying on his usual dark blue couch.. She sighed and went to him, seeing that he was sleeping for bow. Niko smiled softly and puts a blanket over her father.. You could sleep better if you were cozy and warm. Niko remembered that she needed to handle something quick- She went to the door and openned it.

-"Where are you going?"

Her big brother John saw that she was planning to leave..Even if it was almost dinner time. He placed the wood in the fire, it was spring and yet it felt like it was still winter.

-"I'm going to the church.. I'll be back home soon though, see ya..!"

Niko got out once more and step by step made her way to the holy building..To be honest, the church was scary.. All dark colours and paintings of suffering- Even some god statues were scary. But Niko always felt much calmer when she saw the Maria statue. She closed her eyes and held her hands together.

-"God.. It is already nine years and three months that this ghost is haunting me.. The cries, they scare. Please help me..Give me a sign to freedom. In the name of our saviour. Amen.."

Niko could not live forever with this kind of ghost that visits her each night. Each time begging to save her child more specefictly her son.. What was this all about? She letted out a sigh- A sad one.. A concerned one. Was this all in her head? Was Niko getting crazy? Her parents and siblings didn't realky believe her.. Her mother did but she didn't know what to do. She rubbed her forehead and just went back home after doing the little cross sign. Niko really believed that god exists.. That someone is watching you.. Sins, Actions, Desires..Wishes. It was scary and yet so releaving in her opinion. After having dinner and a family talk, it was time to prepare for bed. Niko took a shower to refresh herself, she brushed her teeth, got in a fresh nightgown and then finnaly got in bed.

{ [OST|https://youtu.be/aG-39UWA4u0]}

Niko knew what will be going on tonight, she just hoped that it will stop. Each time, she repeats that hope. 12 pm.. It's almost time, Niko's eyes stayed open- She probably won't be able to sleep this night again. This was a punishement.. Was it really though? Niko didn't know but it was horrible to go through.

-"Go..Go.. Go back to the mansion.. He needs you.. You need to make him happy. Please. That's my only wish.."

-"W-Why can't you just leave me alone?"

-"Go..Go.. Go back to the mansion.. He needs you.. You need to make him happy. Please. That's my only wish.."

This repeated over and over again. Niko tried to get a other answer but it still was the same the "Go..Go.. Go back to the mansion.. He needs you.. You need to make him happy. Please. That's my only wish.." was always repeating. Niko had enough, she will go back there, early in the morning to not get wolves or other wild animals after her.

And she really did this plan. In the morning, around 5 am, she got up and got in her red gypsy dress and she wrapped a yellow scarf around her waist, she also puts on her yellow bandana after that she had brushed her long brown hair. She took a quick toast from the kitchen and frowned. She will return back home like last time, she was sure that it would happen as planned.

-"Let's get done with this"

Niko mumbled after getting out and going to the forest. Niko could see now where she was going. It wasn't dark, it was sunny already. The brunnette tried to find the mansion, but it was nowhere to be seen. It really annoyed her, she wanted to not be haunted by that woman anymore, she didn't want to struggle anymore with it. This was going to be the end. Did she really need to wish for the mansion to appear out of nowhere??

Niko ran through the bushes but that caused her to trip, she shook her head and got up after wiping some of the dirt away. But then.. When she lifted her eyes back up to normal. It was there- The mansion that she searched for for hours long. Niko stepped towards the gates-

Niko gulped when the gates went open on it's own. This was..Magic? No way. She must be dreaming. Niko slapped her cheeks with her hands.

-"Gah.. Niko-chan.. Wake uppppp..! Owie-"

Niko stopped slapping her cheeks and took a big inhale before taking the courage to enter the territory of the mansion. A certain stress overwhelmed Niko, it was uncomfortable... As if she was going in some type of haunted mansion. The crows were watching Niko, some letting out their loud bird noises.. These type of birds were mostly around graveryards. Which made this give more of a creepy atmosphere. Niko knocked on the door and waited- She learned last time that shouldn't just enter a house/mansion out of nowhere.. But hey she had no other choice. Niko saw that the door openned.. But weirdly nobody was behind it. Anyone would be running away from this already..No? Niko would have loved to do that but she really wanted to get the spirit away from her. So- Niko got in and looked around..

-"Helloo?? Someone here..? Uh.."

{[OST|https://youtu.be/_iF7lkXKHlA]}

Niko wanted to check first of course. And yet, there was no reply.. Maybe they weren't home? The brunnette wanted to know what the woman meant. 'Make him happy' 'Fix him' 'He needs you', her only wish. The spirit meant a person? Of course- Niko facepalmed. The brunnette still felt that same uncomfortable feeling, that feeling of being watched. This place wasn't safe.. It wasn't safe at all!! Niko had shivers running down her spine. Blood.. Blood running down the walls, Niko's visions made her think that.. This mansion.. It had bad secrets.. Secrets that nobody should ever know about.

Run..

Niko's mind kept telling her to run. Run for your life. Run for you freedom before-

Niko had ran back to the front door, it won't open?! No no- This wasn't the plan. God, what did Niko end up into?! Tears ran down her cheeks as fear took her over once more, was she trapped? Was this a prank??

Niko felt a hand on her shoulder.. She hesitated to look behind, but after some seconds she did. A albino man, right there..Glaring down at her with his intimidating look. Niko could not take it anymore.. She fainted. The man catched her in time and groaned.

Run for your freedom before it's too late..

It's too late...

He snarled when he saw her exposed neck with her black chocker necklace. He seemed to hold back something- He seemed to control it for now. The man openned his lips to speak out his words;

End of episode 1... 🍂

Information section:

Time taken: Started on 6 oct 2020- Finished on 14 oct 2020.

Credits;; Story (@me); Edits (@Me) Niko at the gates (Old edit)

I hope that you enjoyed! And I also hope that you would like to follow my journey of Wrong Blood!

See you soon... 🎃

I had posted this long ago but I wanted to share it here too♡

[dominaecaede]

Tomorrow Never Comes

Chapter 4 results: 65% chose to see who it is

〘 twitter 〙

The following story will have themes such as blood, gore, situations that may cause anxiety and major character death. If you are sensitive to any of these, please do not proceed.

Chapter 5: It's A Small World After All

They watched the knob shake and jangle and the door banging in. Beads of sweat rolled down the side of their foreheads as their brains pounded with what to do. If they let this mysterious person continue, those creatures will hear the knocks and they'll kill him. If not, then they could save a life. The life of someone they don't know whether they were trustworthy or not.

"We... We have to let him in," Kirishima stood up. "Those things are gonna get him if we don't!"

Enji only grunted. He was always hard to read but surely his inner conscience knew it was the right thing to do. The man took out a hunting knife he had holsted in his belt and held it on guard, using his other hand to unlock the door.

"Try anything funny and I'm gonna slice your damn head off," he spoke firmly before holding the door wide open.

The hooded figure immediately ran in, followed by Enji slamming the door closed and locking it. He held up his knife at the stranger's head point. It prompted the figure to raise his hands up.

"Alright. Now take off your hood and show your face."

The figure nodded and obliged. When he put his hood down, a face was revealed that Enji would never forget. That thick spiky black hair and stapled scarred flesh were unforgettable. It made Enji hostile.

"...! You damn villain...!" Enji snarled and charged at him.

Dabi was prepared, though. He dodged Enji's attack and pulled out a gun he had in his belt, using it to wack the knife out of his hand and point it at him effortlessly. He chuckled, and the group knew full well that this man wasn't intimidated in the least. Midoriya watched. His reflexes were fast and swift.

"Now, now," Dabi began. "I know I have quite the reputation, but the world's gone to shit. Without quirks, should I even be called a villain anymore? Since without quirks, I don't consider you a hero anymore, oh powerful Endeavor."

His tone of voice was mocking, the smirk on his face as the cherry on top. It pissed the man off. Todoroki stood up and was in front of his mother as he held up his metal baton in a protective position.

"You killed people even before this happened," Bakugou spoke up. "Why the hell should we trust you?"

"I killed heroes who weren't worthy of that title, not random people on the streets," Dabi clarified. "And I may just so happen to have information you'll need, so put your weapons down, or kill me and you'll be left in the dark."

There was a moment of silence as everyone darted their eyes around the room. When the group came to a silent agreement, they put their weapons down. However, Enji still had his weapon up with fierce eyes. Dabi blinked.

"You really think I'm stupid enough to put down my weapon for you?" Enji barked.

Dabi only sighed. "Whatever. You were always a bitter old man, anyway."

Todoroki sat down next to Rei again, who was quiet the entire time. The woman didn't seem scared by the former villain. In fact, her storm colored eyes only observed Dabi from where she was. Dabi sat down in the chair not too far from the door. Midoriya took his spot back on the floor, crossing his arms at him.

"Okay, so start talking," Todoroki spoke. "Why'd you come to this room specifically when you could've escaped the hospital?"

"For the same reason you all did," Dabi answered and looked up at Rei. "To see her. I just didn't expect a full party here."

Todoroki got defensive. "But why? What the hell do you have planned with my mother?"

Dabi snorted. "Relax, kid. I came here to see if what I heard was true, only it turns out it wasn't."

"...?" Todoroki blinked. "If what was true?"

Enji sighed, in which caught everyone's attention. The man looked down. "... If Clearnox got to her."

Dabi raised his brow at the man and gave an amused smirk. "So you and I thought the same thing, huh?"

"There's that name again. Clearnox...," Midoriya muttered. "What did they want with Todoroki-san?"

That's when Enji stood up to look out the window, having an almost visible concerned look on his face. Those who knew him would be surprised to see such a face. "Back to when everything wasn't like this, Clearnox contacted my agency. Yura Hana was seeking subjects for their upcoming project and that Rei was chosen among the 'lucky people' who would take part in it. Rei was under strict protection under me, so I assumed Yura discovered this. 'She would be a completely new person than before,' she said. 'It's not good to keep her cooped up in a hospital room knowing she has so much potential to be something more.' It seemed sketchy but then it seemed... tempting when she put it that way."

"But you declined her, right?" Todoroki raised his brow.

"No, but I didn't accept her offer either. I told her that I'd think it over," Enji responded. "But... Something wasn't right. So I sent spies to their company and see what this project was all about. What I found out was... beyond words."

Midoriya furrowed his brows. "And what did you find out?"

Enji turned his gaze towards the greenette and then the rest od the group. "That they were actually experimenting on people."

Their breath hitched. Kirishima winced. "Experimenting?"

"Yes," Enji nodded. "My associates sent pictures they took of people strapped into these beds and these people in suits injecting something in them. I didn't know what it was but I kept the photos as proof to warn others and to intentionally bring their organization down. From what it looks like, it seemed to have been going on for a while. Here, take a look yourselves."

He tossed three photographs onto Rei's hospital bed where they could see. They were hidden photos of people screaming, deteriorating and dying. That would explain why her name was on that list. Todoroki was horrified. "And... They wanted to experiment on my mother? To do this to her? But why?"

"That I don't know," Enji responded. "But after one of my associates reported to me, something happened. I remember his breathing began to get heavier and he screamed... Then there was silence. The same thing happened to the others. Only one survived long enough to send this last photo to me."

Enji then tossed the one last photo and Midoriya picked it up to examine it. He gasped. It showed the face of one of those creatures, blurred out as if the photographer was running for their life in the process. "Those things were people? What the hell?" Bakugou whispered.

"When that happened, I didn't hesitate to make my way to Rei's room. But by the time I got to the hospital, it was already infested with those things. I can only assume that the hospital was one of the first buildings to go down."

Todoroki was in disbelief. "That's... That's insane. So... Clearnox caused this to happen..."

"That's so fucked up," Kirishima blinked. "Who would do something like this?"

"Someone who probably thought that they'd make a big profit for themselves," Dabi spoke up as he reloaded his gun. "From what I've seen on the way here, those things are contagious too. There was this survivor running away from one of them. They got her, but not even a couple minutes later she began making those deafening noises."

"Are you fucking serious?" Bakugou huffed. "If we get bit by one of those things, we become one?"

"Seems like it," Dabi shrugged.

"I'm still confused though," Todoroki stood up. "You didn't just come to this room specifically just to see if some rumours were true. What's my mom to you? Why are you really here?"

Dabi didn't respond at first, but he didn't want to answer that anyway. However, he didn't have to after all. Rei stood up and began walking towards him, in which made the former villain stand up as well. Her hands reached up to touch his face and the woman's eyes began tearing up.

"... Because you never forgot about me... Like I never forgot about you...," Rei whispered. "Isn't that right... Touya?"

Both Enji's and Dabi's eyes widened. He instantly walked towards the woman and the former villain and put a hand on her shoulder. "Rei, that's not Touya. Touya is gone... He's been missing for years. He's never coming back."

"And why do you think that is?! You made my child disappear!" Rei snapped back, causing Enji's hand to fall off her shoulder. "But a mother never forgets her child's face, no matter how many years have gone by... And that is my son. That's my Touya...! He came back! Just look at his eyes, Enji! Don't you dare deny that truth!"

The large man looked back up at Dabi to see for himself, and the villain stayed silent. In fact, Dabi's expression changed. He looked sad. Enji's own facial expression began to change in realization, followed by disbelief.

"No...," Enji shook his head. "You can't be..."

Rei began sobbing and took Dabi in her arms, holding him tight and not letting go. The former villain didn't do anything, however. He stayed silent and let it be, but he began blinking rapidly as if he was going to cry as well. He couldn't form any words.

However, their time of sentimentality was cut short. The screeching noises seemed to be getting louder and closer towards the door, with the sound of their feet making loud thuds on the floor from running. Bakugou backed up.

"Shit, they're coming...!"

"Dammit...!" Dabi's eyes darted every corner of the room for a way out, but the only way was through the window. He snatched Todoroki's metal baton and broke the window open, then looked out of it. "There's a shade over the second story window and a large patch of grass underneath. It'll hurt but it's our only way out. We have to hurry!"

But by the time anyone could make a choice, those things were already at the door trying to break it down. Enji darted towards it and used his strength to keep it closed. Eventually the door broke open, but Enji was still pushing through and forcing it closed. The group had begun lunging out of the window; Bakugou was already down, Todoroki carefully guiding Rei out and Midoriya was soon to follow.

"Shit, it's not gonna stay closed...!" Kirishima darted to help Enji keep it closed, trying to find anything to barricade it but he couldn't find anything within reach. Enji grunted and looked back at the group before looking at Kirishima.

"You have to get out of here, boy! Or else you won't make it!"

"But then you'll die!" Kirishima shouted.

Midoriya was already at the edge of the window to jump down, but when he heard both Enji and Kirishima shouting in the back, he knew they weren't following. The greenette rushed to look behind. "BOTH OF YOU, COME ON! WE'RE RUNNING OUT OF TIME!"

"SOMEONE HAS TO STAY BEHIND TO KEEP THESE THINGS AT BAY WHILE YOU ALL ESCAPE. YOU HAVE TO GO, BOY! NOW!!"

Who should stay behind?

• Enji?

• Or Kirishima?

[erijonarexhepis-blog]

STAY STRONG, MAMA

SEASON FOUR, EPISODE SIX

Masterlist

Today is April’s first day at Atwater And Steele, a law firm associated with Jorge Castillo. April exits the elevator, and the room she enters is filled with lawyers. "Dr. Coleman."

Marian makes her way over to April with a smile. "Marian." She shakes the lawyer's hand. "It's good to see you again."

"Likewise. Walk with me." April nods and starts walking next to Marian. "After you accepted the offer, I looked more into your background, and I'm impressed. You've achieved so much academically, which is impressive considering your age."

The two enter Marian's office. "I already knew how smart you were because of the case we worked together." Marian sits by her desk. "I mean, bachelor degrees, masters degrees, PhDs. Fluent in seven languages."

April nods a little, brushing off the impressed look on Marian's face. "I would get bored and learn a new language." She takes a seat opposite Marian.

"Photographic memory?"

"Eidetic," April corrects her. "I remember everything I read, basically."

Marian nods. "That's something that's going to come to use when we work on cases. We have a client, and I'm leaving it to you to do a background check on her. Find out everything you can on this woman- where she likes to hang out, who she is friends with and related to. Everything."

"Yes, ma'am." Marian grabs a file from the desk and hands it to April.

"Your new desk has your name on it, so it's easy to locate. Get started."

"Yes, ma'am." With the file in hand, April walks out of the office. Her desk wasn't far from Marian's office, and she found it almost immediately.

////

When April sees Marian exit her office, she grabs the piece of paper from her desk and approaches her. "Marian."

"What did you find?"

"Jennifer's parents are Allen and Megan," April starts. "Jennifer took over her father's company after he passed away due to natural causes, and her mother works in law enforcement. She usually hangs out at Shot Tower Coffee with her good friend, Leslie Doyle."

"Good." Marian smiles as she grabs the paper from April- she then proceeds to hand her the folder she was holding. "I want that on my desk at the end of the day." She doesn't give April the chance to respond because she walks away.

April goes back to her desk, sitting down and placing the folder on the table. Before getting started on the assignment, she emails Eddie Tate- Caleb's friend. April writes that she is a law student looking to clear Caleb's name, and she wants to meet.

The email is sent. April grabs the folder but gets a text before she can open it. It's from Mark- he wrote that the plan is in motion.

////

Michaela opens the door, letting April into Wes' apartment. Michaela called her earlier and told her everything- their plan to leak the files and get Jorge arrested. She told her that Jorge got Wes killed. "I couldn't keep this a secret anymore," Michaela says. She sits on the bed, next to Laurel.

"I had a feeling he was involved," April tells them. "That's why I took the job at Atwal and Steele. They're associates."

"Wait," Michaela speaks up in surprise. "Are you serious?"

"I know I said I would let it go, but my mom is dating this guy. They're both bad people."

"She is right," Laurel tells Michaela, agreeing with April.

"We have the chance to take them both down now. Two birds, one stone." April crosses her arms. "You get the idea. Besides, they can't get married in prison."

Oliver barges in, startling Michaela and Laurel. "Hey, I have good news!" He closes the door.

"God, Oliver, you need to knock!" Laurel exclaims.

"I'm sorry. I-I'm too excited." Oliver looks over at April, who is leaning against the desk now. "H-hi, April."

"She knows."

Oliver seems surprised by Laurel's statement. "You're in?"

"To take down Jorge and my mom? Obviously." April walks up to a confused Oliver. "What were you going to say when you barged in?"

"Huh? Oh yeah, right. I spoke to Lazlo," he tells them.

"You outed us to the ponytail guy?" Michaela asks.

"All I.T. guys are the same. You get them talking about the size of their hard drive, and they can't shut up. The only access to it is completely air-gapped."

April scoffs. "Of course it is."

Michaela glances at her girlfriend before moving her attention back to Oliver. "English, Oliver."

"Air-gapped means it's walled off from the outside world, which means it's totally unhackable. I would need a security badge specially coded for the room, and only four of those are given out in the entire firm- Lazlo and the three senior partners on the Antares case."

Michaela is quick to protest. "No."

"Tegan is our only way in," Laurel tells her.

"Then we need to find another way in. I'm not sabotaging her entire career for this."

"You just met her."

"She could end up dead like that nerdy accountant."

"Well, Wes is already dead!"

"Whose fault is that?!" Michaela immediately regrets her words. "I-I-I didn't mean that. I didn't. I-I'm sorry." Laurel turns away.

Michaela walks around the bed to face Laurel. "I'm- I'm upset. But Tegan has been good to me and generous and nice, supportive. So I'm destroying one of the very few good people in my life."

"But we can't have come this far to just turn away. We have to be strong. We have to stick to the plan. That is what we all owe Wes."

"Laurel is right, Michaela," April speaks up. "Jorge and my mom need to be locked up, and if Tegan is our way to do it then I'm willing to take that risk."

"April-"

"I don't see another way here," she interrupts Michaela. "If there was another way to get in, we would take it. But there isn't."

Michaela looks at her for a moment, before looking away- not responding. April looks down on her phone and sees that Eddie has responded to her email- he wants to meet.

////

Eddie sent April his address in the email. He lives in an apartment. She knocks on the door and waits for him to answer, which doesn't take long. "You must be April," is the first thing Eddie says. "Come in."

"Thanks." April walks into the apartment, and Eddie closes the door. "Thank you for agreeing to meet.”

"No problem. Let's sit."

"You've got a nice apartment." They sit in the living room area.

"Thank you. I was surprised to hear from you."

"Really? How's that?"

"Well, you being a law student. And I've seen you on the news."

April gives him a tight smile. "That was a long time ago. As you know, I'm here to talk about Caleb."

Eddie nods. "Right. What's there to say? He was a good man, and, unfortunately, he died. He was way too young."

"You say he was a good man. In what way do you mean?" April tries to stay calm, not wanting to blow her cover.

"Well, Caleb was a cop, and he loved to help people," Eddie says. "He would go out of his way to make sure people were safe. He was good like that."

April nods at his answer, silently disagreeing. "I see."

"A lot of people hated Caleb because he was a cop, but they didn't know him like I did. I'm not just saying this because we were friends. Caleb was always there for people he cared about."

"So, you don't think Caleb would do any harm to anyone?"

Eddie shakes his head, finding the questions ridiculous. "Absolutely not. That's not who he was."

"Okay," April gives him a slight nod. "Then we just have to make people think that too. It's not going to be easy. People already don't trust cops, understandingly."

"How so?"

"History," April shrugs slightly. "Police's treatment of black people and the way they support rapists over rape victim. I mean, it's not that hard to understand."

"Something tells me you're speaking from personal experience."

"I guess I am."

"So, what's the story?"

April lets out a slight chuckle. "This isn't about me."

"I want to hear it."

"Nope. Sorry."

Eddie chuckles slightly. "Fine. I'm going to get us some tea, and then we'll continue." He stands up.

"Oh, you don't have to."

"Of course I do. I will be right back." Eddie makes his way to the kitchen, leaving April alone.

"Tell me about Caleb and Cassandra," April says before taking a sip from her tea.

"They met randomly in some park. I don't remember where," Eddie starts, his cup of tea in his hand. "Caleb called me right after they met. Told me they had this long conversation. It's like they clicked immediately." He smiles at the memory. "He talked about that day a lot. Their relationship was great. I mean, they had their arguments, but what couple doesn't?"

"What did Cassandra think about the rumors that were going around about Caleb?"

"She didn't believe them. She knew Caleb. Loved him."

"Killed him."

Eddie sighs. "I loved Caleb, but if she killed him, then I know she had a reason. Cassandra isn't a violent person, so I believe that she wouldn't have done it unless she thought it was her last option."

April is surprised by his answer. "You're not upset that she killed your friend?" She puts the cup down, feeling a little lightheaded.

"I was upset at first, but I understand now." Eddie tilts his head slightly to the side, observing her.

April is trying to focus on Eddie, her vision getting blurry. "You okay there?" He chuckles.

"Uh," April mumbles, confused. Not knowing what's happening. She rubs her forehead as her vision continues to get worse.

"Don't worry," Eddie tells her. She feels weak and sleepy- and somewhat, it feels familiar. "You're just going to sleep," his voice sounds like a whisper. Slowly, her vision goes dark.