#and i dont think my body doing the whole no clotting thing is helping either so...

[xviruserrorx]

Why the ever living fuck does having endometriosis in your throat, lungs, and your general breathing space area exist!!!???

[pcos-and-endo-awareness]

I think I might have endometriosis and I dont know what to do. Is it worth trying to get a diagnosis? Because I feel like they cant do anything about it either way. On one hand i feel like it would be a relief to hear that it isn't normal and that i am not weak just because I cant deal with some regular period cramps. I dont think its normal to throw up because of the pain and lay on the bathroom floor half passed out because of nausea and pain for hours in the middle of the night, but at the same time muy cramps only lasts for like a day or two so I feel like im just exaggerating. I want to be validated in a way but im nervous about it not actually being anything wrong if that makes sense.

Also i feel like the only thing doctors can do is prescribe birth control and I have been on one kind (one with only one of the ususal substances) and while it have lowered the pain to only very occasional tame cramps I dont really like it because of the spotting because it is so irregular that I have had to wear pads for like a year and i dont really trust that it works, i would like it to get rid of the whole problem and stop all pain. And the doctors wont put me on regular birth control because im fat so my bmi is too high which means a higher risk for blood clots. Is there anything else they can do? I know some people get hysterectomies but I dont want that now at least cause i think I might want to have kids in the future. Is there anything else they can do that makes it worth it to fight for a possible diagnosis since that may take years and be difficult or should i just cope with it since my symptoms isn't really that bad?

(Also i just ran out of birth control and haven't decided what to do so im really scared that my period will come back now and it will hurt)

First of all, I think you should find a new doctor. I am also “fat” and I NEVER had any doctor refuse to put me on regular birth control. BC has risks and it has pros and cons, as long as your doc is explaining all of that to you they should let YOU make that decision about your own body.

If you are in horrific pain it is not normal. If you are puking and passing out because of cramps that isn’t normal. You are not exaggerating or overreacting. You deserve to get treatment. You deserve to be in less pain. You deserve to have more convenience.

I urge you to try to get a new birth control (for example I’m on the depo shot, least amount of pain I have been in for years on this BC) and if your doc won’t do it find a different one who will. Remember doctors are there to listen to you and help you.

There are various home remedies to try for endo but there is no cure. Birth control will help. The only sure fire way to get rid of it is laparoscopic surgery, and this will only help for some time because the endometriosis will just grow back. (And how much it will help depends on the competence/experience of the surgeon doing it.) I believe I’ve read that even a full hysterectomy doesn’t cure endo.

I’m sorry you’re going through this and I hope you can get the care and treatment you need.

[yellowsounds124-blog]

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I have something I need to share. Not with you, with someone else but that'll never happen, its simply not possible, but I need this off my chest and dont have a safe place for it. With your stance on abortion, I figured you would be a good place, sense you wont see the fetus in this story as a "clump of cells" Growing up, my dad was not okay. He was abusive. It took me years and years to say this because through all the running away and calling the police, not going home- I was told over and over that it was fine because he wasnt raping me or punching me in the face. The pushing, screaming inches from my face, tearing apart my stuff, throwing things at me, making me change in front of him, refusing to be by me in public if I didnt look good enough...didnt matter. I was told I was being ridiculous and should be greatful. My friends.. I would beg them please dont leave me alone with him if he ask you to leave the room. But they always would what were they suppose to do? I wouldnt be allowed to talk to anyone to go out for months at a time. So there was a huge foundation of fear, and protecting myself. At some point, i met this guy (brother of my friend), and I just loved him, and he loved me to. He was a POC, once we started with each other his sister hated me for some reason, which made his mom hate me. And my parents hated him (I later figured this was a race and class thing for my father) so being together involved a lot of sneaking around, a lot of giving up, a lot of trying again, the sneaking around would get me in more trouble, especially if it was known it was with him. At this point, I didnt tell anyone how bad it was, I started self mutation. If I wasnt with him (we will call him Kay for the sake of thevstory) I would do any drug I could get and have sex or mess with whoever showed interest (well almost). It was how I would cope as I didnt think I could tell anyone. How could I say anything about what I was going through when I had a friend being raped by her brother, a friend who's dad just up and left, a friend whos mom called her fat and made her diet? I was literally a wreck and the worst part of the cycle was being this wreck made him more angry, he'd treat me worse, and I'd further wreck myself. So about Kay, we went on and off for years, then he moved in with a friend who was only a street away, I wasnt at a 8-3 school anymore and he graduated do it was really easy to be together. I immediately broke up with this other guy I was seeing (we will call him Colin) that my dad liked so I would use him to be able to leave the house ect so I could be with Kay. It was only a month and a half of perfection before it started falling apart. Kay wanted to talk to my father, he didnt know what things were like except that he didnt like him. He thought he could talk to him about how much he loved me and make things better, and I freaked out. He knew I was hurting myself, a few months before my father** had saw the marks and yelled at me asking if I was crazy, asking what the hell was wrong with me, telling me it was disgusting and I stayed in a padded room for a night before being released sense I wasnt suicidal, and Kay saw on my body that I had found a new more hidden place after that incident. He thought he could save me, and we would get married and be happy, but I knew if he went to talk to my father that my father would send him off and I would pay for trying such a thing. * That's when I made multiple huge mistakes that I havent shared with people, 9 years later. First, i broke up with him and told him i didnt even like him and needed time to discover myself,stuff like that. I never stopped loving him. To this day, I'm sure I'd still fall apart at his touch. *Within that same week, I missed my period, I again wasnt able to leave the house, I bought a tested while at the store with my mom, was caught and ordered to take it as soon as we were back. This was bad because if it was negative, I was going to be in trouble for basically no reason. And again this "trouble" wasnt normal. It meant my things wouldbe torn apart. I would be held down and screamed at, spit on not allowed to talk. But it wasnt negative, it was positive. And my mom was waiting downstairs, and I knew this only had a small handful of outcomes. Either they would send me off and have me give the baby up for adoption while being under close watch the whole time, or they would make me get rid of the baby. Abortion. So I did the first thing that came to mind, I called Colin. I told him I was pregnant and it was his. And that I couldnt talk right now. Then I told my mom, and immediately told her that Colin knew. To me, this was security. If he knew, someone would be checking in on me, he would tell his parents, another adult would he involved, if I disappeared there would be questions. And I knew I was right because I told my mom he knew and immediately she was upset I did that. I went in for an ultrasound, found out how far I was, quickly gave Colin a photo and shut the door on him. And the problems started. The dates dont match up, Colin said. I told him hes wrong. His parents wanted a paternity test, I said that's not possible itll hurt the baby. They claimed it wouldnt. I convinced Colin it was his and I just knew. He knew i had been seeing Kay but took my word.Then i heard from Kay, he heard I was pregnant. If he even thought it was his he would be at my door, trying to figure things out, trying to talk to my parents. But my father would not respect him the way he would Colin, so if anyone knew it was Kay's, I would be hurt, punished, sent away. I was terrified, I cant even explain the level of panic I had for my safety. I told Kay it wasnt his, there was no single way, and to leave me alone forever. It hurt so much to tell him that, it felt so wrong and I hated it and I knew it hurt him and I was so broken over it. After that, i was still stuck. The dates didnt match, Colin's parents wanted a paternity test, *the baby was partly a POC and might not come out white, so I wouldnt be able to pass them off as Colin's. I couldnt sleep. My father wasmt speaking to me and wasnt even around, really. I stayed in my room. My parents were pushing for me to get an abortion. "Were just going to the clinic so you can see what its like" my mom said when she took me to the abortion clinic. It was down a stair case, there were no protesters. They took my blood, they walked me through everything and asked when they could set up an appointment. They asked me one time if I wanted to do this, in front of my mom who stared me down. When she brought me back, she paid extra for them to put me to sleep. While I waited with the IV and the last ultra sound pictures I'd have done, I started crying. My mom wasnt there for this part, a nurse asked me why I was crying, she was so angry about it. I said sorry and tried to stop. She didnt ask if i wanted to do this, no one told me that i was at the point where the baby was like a small miniature looking baby, only slightly misshapen. No one told me it had tiny hands and feet, or what they would do with it afterward. And no one made sure i wanted this. When I went in the room I was alone with a Male doctor, and I remember how unusual that was as I had always been asked if I wanted someone else in the room if left with a Male doctor. And I laid on the doctor bed, and I remember think I should say something, this is my last chance, and then I was asleep. When I woke up I was given pads, they told my mom, not me, even though I was 17, that I would bleed for a few days. I never went to the check up appointment. I stayed in my room, I scanned every blood clot for a piece of the baby. I slept and cried, when I heard from Colin I told him that I lost the baby. That's all. I lost the baby. People spread rumors it wasnt ever real. I didn't care. I didnt leave my room. I didnt shower, I barely ate. I gave up Kay, and all my friends connected to him, Colin started dating my bestfriend and they talked shit about me, I lost everyone connected to them. I was just alone. My father came back and was around more. They never talked to me about it, never asked if I was okay. I was like that for months, before finding friends online, forcing myself to listen to happy music, go out, pretending. Fake it till you make it. I met two people, we will call Slw and Ice- who helped me in that time more than they will ever know because they didnt know about it. Slw once asked why we didnt hang out with my friends and I got really upset with him but they both helped me so much. Ice reminded me it was okay to hurt and not be okay, he just didnt know what about. I made more friends, I am so greatful for every single one because they are the only reason I dudnt take my own life in those following years. Things got bad again. I got bad. I am better now, I have kids. People say I am a good mom. But ever sense "getting better" I think about that baby everyday. I worry life will take one of my babies that are here because I let that one die. How can I be a good mom when I let that happen? And I dont deserve them. And I am so sorry to that child. I could have found another way. I could have spoke more. That childs dad would have loved them and had no choice. I hate myself for this, every day. And again, have no where to go to talk about it. Like I said I just needed to get it off my chest because it eats me alive, everyday. Regardless of if people think abortion is right or wrong. To me, I know I got rid of a baby with a future, and its minimalized.

[shouldering-space]

Listen, I’m just getting my theory on so I’m going to list all the junk I noticed in the bio inc video today...

I can’t put it together very well yet, so just some little things I noticed that could mean something, but maybe not.

 Anti claims to have been running the channel this entire time so we can infer that before Schneep came in, “Jack” was really just Anti acting. But why would he choose to “save” Jack? He could of played off killing him as a joke.

“Jack” ran off camera due to seeming sick. Was that because Schneep was taking control, a fight for control between Anti and the doctor, or was it actually Jack getting sick just like his character in the game?

 We’ve only really seen Schneep (i really cant spell his name im sorry) kill his patients before. In the description of Bio. Inc. Redemption #4 it even says that he is a “true doctor of death” so why is he suddenly saving Jack of all people. I mean sure he tried to save Peter (peetahhh) because it seemed like he genuinely liked him/his accounting skills, but in the same episode he refers to Jack (that last guy) as a sham and a travesty, but in the new episode he’s desperate to save Jack and calls him his friend many times.

In the beginning of the video Schneep puts his mask on saying that we “can’t see his beautiful face” but takes it off soon after and later removes his hat. He also complains about the heat, what’s making him so hot (bow chikka bow wow) is it Anti? Is he removing everything because Anti is taking back control?

 Schneep says that Jack is sometimes one person sometimes a completely different person, Anti is mostly known as the complete opposite to Jack. But the way it’s worded kind of makes it sound like Schneep wasn’t under the impression that he’d been talking to Anti. Maybe he never actually knew that Anti got control in October and was fooled just like we were. Or maybe he was talking to Jack and the “mood swings” were just the other egos showing through, but if that’s how it works then how would Schneep be able to talk to Jack at all? It’s an interesting line that I would love to examine more.

“I am a very smart doctor, as you all know. I saved Peter from the brink...” or “I am a very smart doctor. As you all know, I saved Peter from the brink...” The comma is pretty important to me because as far as we have seen Peter is dead. In the Dr. Septiceye Power Hour Schneep clearly lost Peter while operating and in bio inc #4 he said that Peter was “long dead and buried” Now with the comma in the second position shown it implies that we all were aware that Peter is not dead which a major theory I have could explain which is that I don’t think that was Schneep at all. The whole time it could have been Anti which could explain this particular line and how such an obvious mistake could be made, it feels very intentional as well. Showing the doctor failing would definitely give Anti the attention he needs which is why I really don’t think that was Schneep. I could really go more into this and bring in the glasses, the costume, the accent, the missed pronunciations, and other changes but i dont really want to flood this post TOO much.

“I saved my very good friend, Chase. Chase Brody. He went back, he saw his family. Did they take him back? We may never know.” This is another big flashing light line, First of all because we don’t know HOW Schneep saved him. Did he save him from the “suicide” he had at the end of the bro average video, from Jack’s play of bio inc #2, or from something else like an attack from Anti? If this is the doctor talking then should we infer that Chase is dead, like Peter and Schneep has just altered his memories? Is Chase’s family dead as well then? Also it’s important to point out that it’s his “very good friend” Chase just like his “friend” Jack, it’s pretty interesting to think when paired with point #5. And then if we consider that it ISN’T Schneep and it’s Anti then maybe we should assume that Chase is dead or “gone forever” because of the whole “we may never know” bit.

A big thing I noticed was all of the mispronounced words in the video. At first I thought it was just Jack having some trouble because there’s a bunch of weird medical terms, but then at 4:48 it got a bit weird. First of all the way he said “blood clots” was really strange, maybe that was just him trying to do the accent or maybe it was just a weird tongue slip, but it seemed kind of deliberate, it might have been to show the doctor getting infected by Anti as well. And then right after he VERY deliberately and clearly says that they needed to be treated with “antiCOLGATE” (anticoagulants) Now first of all it has Anti straight up in the name so it seems a bit weird that Jack would mess up the word so much, but then it gets weirder because later in the video he says the word correctly. That whole situation feels sketchy to me especially because I don’t know what it implies.Possibly that he only pronounces the word right later because Anti can and Anti is taking back control? He also says that the anticoagulants are the ONLY way to prescribe victory in the face of certain doom which can further imply that Schneep isn’t in this video.

Schneep claims that he is the only way to deal with things in your body that want to destroy you. So that one felt pretty obvious for why he is the first ego that we actually see Anti target, but it also implies that Chase did not turn evil as we previously thought because then Schneep would have “dealt” with him and not saved him wouldn’t he?

The whole I feel it in my own arm bit also implies that as Jack gets hurt Schneep gets hurt and that the game did actually kill Jack in the end. But it also implies that Schneep IS in the same body as the others, but it really confuses me how Jack had “mood swings” if Schneep was IN his head becoming friends with him, wouldn’t Schneep have caught on to what was happening, if so, why didn’t he act sooner to save Jack?

Listen, I’m not saying that the glitches after “I hear your heart, it beat for me. It beat for Schneep.” Were Anti saying it beats for him instead buttttt..... or maybe it was just Anti saying the heart beat was his but I like the first option.

“I will not have you die. Not again. I will not lose you.” So does this mean that Jack came back after Anti killed him last October? Was it a resuscitation kind of thing or maybe it’s impossible for an ego to die hence Chase’s possible survival. I do remember Jack mentioning somewhere that he thinks of Jack as an ego and that the real him is Seán.

“Tell me what to do” Why would Schneep think that Jack knows what to do? It could just be a tell me whats wrong and i’ll fix it kind of thing but maybe not.

“I need your help! Save him!” This was interesting to me because Schneep probably knows that we wouldn’t be able to help since the video wouldn’t be uploaded in real time so maybe he means that we still have time and need to save Jack before whatever goes on tomorrow.

Also it’s interesting that Schneep resisted the attempt Anti made to make him strangle himself whereas Jack succumbed to slitting his throat in the end, though Anti was pushing for like a whole month sooo.

The voice doubled at the line “I’m trying my best” made it sound like both Schneep and Anti were trying their hardest to complete opposite goals, I don’t really have a theory, I just thought that was a cool detail.

Anti saying they all follow him is weird too because if that was Schneep then he was clearly pretty against Anti and Jack also wasn’t very keen in October, maybe Anti is referring to someone other than the egos when he says that.

I don’t think we’ve seen Anti curse yet or at least in a way THAT emphasized which tells us that he is pretty pissed off at us and probably the egos against him too.

Also he referred to Schneep in the past tense (thought) so either Anti is confident that Schneep lost hope or more likely Schneep is dead/unavailable right now.

“That doctor thought he could save him but he was mine.” So was Anti mad because Schneep was messing with something he, in a sense, claimed?

“He was weak just like the rest of them.” Of the egos? Are they all down right now?

He calls us powerless but doesn’t he get power off of our attention? If we went away, wouldn’t Anti go away too?

Are we his puppets or the egos or...??

“There are no strings on me” there are a lot of things that line could mean but im also pretty tired and hopped up on some medicine so i don’t really have the motivation to go through a bunch of those theories.

Favorite boy.... Chase? Schneep? Jack? Seán? Anti? Jackieboy Man? Marvin? One of Jack’s friends? I don’t know about you guys but im pretty sure he means Jack. and i am excited even though i once again will be gone for a while and might see the video late.

Hope if anyone actually read all of this they enjoyed. I haven’t really read many other people’s theories so if any of these sound copied please tell me and I can delete it or credit them or whatever needs to happen. Happy Theorizing Friends.