catasters

[radlegowaffle]

heaven help her

[freshxsturniolo]

GILMORE GIRLS, MARY-LOU & COOKIES - matt sturniolo x fem!reader

hi babies, i just know matt and his little fall heart would love a chilled cosy evening with his gf watching their favourite shows and you all loved my chris fic with jimmy and mary lou so i hope you all enjoy this xxx

you let out a sigh as you lay your head against the back of the couch, a sense of relief finally washing over you.

it had been an awful day of travelling, the airport so jam packed at LAX with people heading out of the state, delays on almost every flight but yours, however it only caused a knock on effect of bad moods across the airport. your uber had not arrived to take you and the triplets to their home in boston and jimmy had had no choice but to come and collect you all, which only added to the awful mood as the triplets had felt beyond guilty, knowing their dad was busy already that day.

so when you'd finally said hello to everyone, had a bowl of homemade shepards pie that mary-lou had had sat waiting for you all, showered and got into fresh clothes, you could finally relax.

"are you okay, babe?" matt, your ever loving boyfriend said as he appeared around the corner, watching you as you closed your eyes for just a moment.

"hmm" you mumbled, not having the energy to speak and look up at him. you heard him chuckle slightly, and you could feel yourself drifting off to sleep when his weight dropped down at the side of you.

"you can go to bed for a couple of hours if you need to" he said into your ear, before dropping a soft kiss to your cheek. you smiled, embracing his warm touch, finally opened your eyes and turning your head to the side to look at him. his eyes were dark rimmed and his hair was a mess, but he was still so beautiful. you were about to open your mouth when you see chris' figure in the doorway, diverting your eyes straight to him.

"we might head to nathans for a bit, are you two coming?" chris said, and you finally sat up as matt turned his position to face his brother.

"yeah, i'll come." and then he turned back to you. "babe?"

you smiled, reaching out to stroke his face. "i love nathan with my entire heart, but would you mind if i stayed here?"

you already felt guilty, but you'd been so overstimulated for the last 6 hours that the thought of sitting with 4 boys who were all going to be hyped from seeing each other felt too much. you wanted to chill, nap, potentially get some work done on your phone and call in an early night.

"i'll stay with you." matt said instantly, like you knew he would, but you shook your head.

"you've not seen your best friend in months, go." you almost demanded. matt cared for you so much, you could see him already fighting with his eyes, but you smiled softly.

"are you sure?" he said, at the same time you saw mary-lou appear in the doorway too, shuffling past chris.

"are you okay, kids?" she said, and you dropped your hand from matts face to look at her.

"do you mind if i stay here, mary-lou? whilst the boys go to nates"

she beamed at you. "of course i dont mind, my love. this is your home now too."

you smiled at her warmingly before turning back to matt, a smile on his face at his moms words.

"im so tired, matt." you said, and he nodded, dipping forward and pressing a soft kiss to your lips. "tell nate im sorry.

"you'll see him tomorrow, im sure." he smiled.

"i dont doubt it." you chuckle, knowing full well nate was joined at the hip with the triplets whenever they were home. matt stands up, going over to give his mom a hug goodbye, closely followed by chris who then comes over to you, kicking your feet playfully. you'd always had a playful relationship with chris, and you go to kick him back but he runs off into the doorway, slapping matt on the shoulders as he reaches him.

"those boys" mary-lou chuckles at the side of you, and you turn around in time to see her sit at the side of you. "are you okay, my love?" she asks now, and you nod.

"im just tired, and the thought of them all yapping is sending me into another dimension."

she laughs at your words, throwing her head back, and you can't help but laugh with her. once a soft silence falls between you both, you reaches over to the arm rest of the couch and picks up the remote.

"so, i've been watching that show you love" she says now, giving you a smile, and you can't help the excited squeal that overcomes you.

"gilmore girls?" you say.

it was your favourite show, especially when you were home in boston. it had a nostalgic feel that couldn't be replicated anywhere else.

"yes" she chuckles, before the familiar netflix sound fills the living area. "im just about to start season two."

you beam. "my favourite season."

and so the work you were going to do goes out the window, as mary-lou grabs you a blanket, throwing it across your legs as she presses play on the last episode she was on. a soft feeling washing over you as you snuggle down, watching your favourite show.

you were asleep before matt came back home. the evening drawing in, the soft glow of the tv and the candles around you, the warmth of the triplets childhood home. the adrenaline from the day had had you tired beyond belief. but mary-lou let you sleep as she sat at the side of you, your head lulled on the back of the couch and the blanket spread across you.

you didn’t stir when the triplets came back home, and mary-lou hushed them as they came bounding into the living area where you both sat. the minute matt saw you, his face turned into a smile.

“how long as she been asleep?” he whispered, taking in your peaceful face. nick bounded across and sat next to his mom, who engulfed him in a one arm hug, and chris took place on the floor, resting his back against the couch and pulling out his phone.

“why am i not shocked you’re both sat here watching this?” he says.

mary lou chuckles before looking back to matt. “for the past hour”

he smiled, before he slowly sat down beside you, accidentally brushing his knee against yours.

you woke with a startle, looking up at him, before looking around the room. all eyes were on you apart from chris, who was sat not far on his phone, and you let out a smile as you stretched out your neck.

lifting up your foot, you reach chris’ hands perfectly and gently knock them with your foot, startling him so his phone falls out his hands. everyone erupts into laughter as chris lets out a ‘fuck’ before he turns around and grabs your ankle, pulling you slightly so you shift down the couch.

mary-lou swats his hand away whilst matt yells his brothers name, and you can only laugh.

“your girlfriends annoying as shit, bro” chris says, a joking grin on his face.

you shift your position back to where you were just a second before, finally turning around to face your boyfriend.

“hey, tired girl” he says, and you can’t help but let out a yawn. he chuckles as he leans forward, placing a soft kiss to your lips.

nick and chris have started talking to their mom, and their voices fill the room as matt picks up the blanket, positioning himself right next to you before his arm comes around your shoulder, pulling you into his side before placing the blanket over the both of you.

“cookies are in the kitchen” he whispers, as you wrap your arm around his waist, leaning your head against his chest.

“thank you” you whisper, squeezing his side slightly before lifting your head again to look at him. “sorry i didn’t come.”

he smiles. “doesn’t matter. are you okay?”

“never better” you beam, before laying your head back down on his chest.

the rest of the evening is spent lazily watching your favourite show, jimmy coming to join you not long after. you’re too tired to engage in conversation, but you can’t help the laughs that escape as you listen to your favourite family chat amongst themselves, your boyfriends hands running strokes up and down your arm the entire time.

[luvhughes43]

uncle jack | dad!quinn hughes x reader

luvhughes43 masterlist🌷

request: can you write for quinn where you guys have like a 2 or 3 year old daughter together and you guys go on vacation to hawaii with jack and your daughter is OBSESSED with jack like wants to be with him 24/7, takes naps together, he takes her swimming, plays in the sand together, shares ice cream, she makes him play with her barbie mermaids, watches bluey together. but she gets so jealous when fans come up to jack and like talk to him and take pictures with him because she's his number one girl and then she gets mad and cries to quinn about it and quinns sad that she's sad but kinda happy that she went to him because she hasn't been when jacks around. but eventually jack makes it up to her and assures her that he loves her

word count: 1.2k

“‘ack?” your three year old asked as you helped her into her swimsuit. you were vacationing in hawaii with jack and yours and quinns daughter wouldn’t stop asking for him. it made sense, since the youngest hughes never got to see her uncle, but you and quinn were both surprised by how intense her love for her uncle was. if the group was going into the ocean? jack had to be the one to help her swim. when they went to the buffet? jack had to be the one sitting next to her. her asking for jack never stopped.

“were going to go meet him at breakfast baby,” quinn says to the toddler as he fishes the sunscreen out of your bag upon your request. 

after you had made sure everyone had on their sunscreen, you were walking to the buffet. 

“‘ack! ‘ack!” your daughter screams from her dads arm as soon as she sees jack. she leans out of her dads hold, her hands reaching out to signal to jack that she wants him to grab her. 

“princess!” jack smiles at the toddler as he takes her from his brother. 

your daughter starts babbling and talking to jack who nods along enthusiastically to every word. 

“when am i going to get my daughter back?” quinn asks you, pouting slightly as he watches his brother laughing with his daughter.

“she never gets to see him, just give it some time,” you smile softly at your husband. quinn loved that his brothers were so close to his daughter, but they were on day 4 of the trip and it seemed like his daughter wanted nothing to do with him in favour of his brother. 

ynuser

liked by _quinnhughes, jackhughes, trevorzegras, and others

ynuser baby only wants her uncle jack

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trevorzegras damn q she replaced you quick🤣🤣 _quinnhughes 😐

jackhughes my girl❤️

yourbff she’s so cute🥺🥺 need u guys to come home immediately

lhughes_06 jackhughes dont be fooled if i was there she’d only want me

jackhughes sure bud whatever you think

it happened on night 6. you had taken your daughter to the bathroom and by the time you got back to your table a girl was there sitting beside jack. your daughter didn't say anything as she went to quinns side and cuddled in close. it was a long day at the beach, and you were surprised the little girl was still awake. 

“i think we should get this little one to bed,” you spoke to the group as you started to gather your things. your daughter was practically asleep leaning against quinns side. 

“come on, let's go baby” quinn whispered to your daughter as he lifted her into his arms. 

the movement woke her up. “NO!” she protested loudly.

“come on, let's go sleep, you're tired,” you smoothed your daughters hair out of her face.

“unca ‘ack you come too!” the girl whined and jack looked at the girl next to him sheepishly.

“no sweetie we have to go,” you tried to calm your daughter down but it didn't work. 

she started crying, so you and quinn said your goodbyes and made your way back to your hotel room. 

the next morning, the young girl was in a visibly bad mood. the girl from the night before saw you guys at breakfast and pulled up a chair, unknowingly taking your daughters spot. 

the day continued similarly but with other people. fans kept spotting jack and asking for pictures, leaving your daughter confused and upset that her uncle was constantly being pulled away from her. 

you were at the pool when the newest fan approached jack - this time a man in his late forties.

your daughter quietly walked over to quinn with her pool float still in hand. “daddy…” she started, her voice full of sadness. quinn quickly gathered the girl in his arms and leaned back against his lounge chair. 

“whats wrong?” 

“unca ‘ack don't love me!” she whined, leaning her head under her dads chin. 

“what? of course he loves you,” quinn tried to sooth his daughter. “why would you say that?” he questioned. he honestly had no idea where this sudden shift came from. just yesterday the girl literally didn't want to be separated from jack and now she didn't think jack loved her?

“‘ack no want to play!” the little girl explained as she leaned away from her dad to look into his eyes. 

quinn was still visibly confused. they had played literally all day.

“see look daddy! who that!” the girl pushed her hand against her dads cheek effectively making his head turn to see jack and the man from earlier still talking. 

quinn held his daughter a little tighter. “they’re just talking about hockey, baby. jack loves you soo much” quinn reassured the girl, rubbing his hand up and down her back. 

your daughter mumbled something back as she laid her head against her dads shoulder. 

fifteen minutes later, jack was bounding back over to the small family ready to play some games in the pool. “she's sleeping?” he groaned. “i didn’t mean to take that long” jack pouted as he sat in a lounge chair next to you and quinn. 

“she’s tired,” you explained. “she’s been upset too which hasn't helped”

jacks head shot towards you. “she’s upset? why”

quinn sighs, “she thinks you don’t love her anymore”

“what?” jack exclaims which quinn quickly shushes. 

“she’s sleeping!” quinn whisper-yells as he looks down at his daughter cuddled into his chest.

“what did i do?” jack lowers his voice, his eyes never leaving his niece.

“she just wants your attention. she misses you a lot when we're home,” you explain quietly.

jack looks close to tearing up at the news. he hates knowing that his niece is sad even if it's just because she misses him. 

“she’s okay,” you put your hand on jacks shoulder. “she's just young and doesn't fully understand why we can’t see you and everyone else all the time”

“that doesn’t help,” jack pouts.

soon enough your daughter started to stir and jack immediately pulled her out of quinns arms.

“‘ack?” your daughter questioned in her sleepy state. 

“yeah baby it's me,” jack whispered. 

“play now?” 

“yeah lets go!” jack was immediately off of his lounger and into the pool. 

“well it was nice while it lasted” quinn joked. 

“just wait till we get back to michigan and she gets tired of everyone,” you joked, causing quinn to laugh. last summer when the boys would all try to play with her after a long day she’d yell “no playing! no playing!”

as the day went on, you’d overhear jack telling your daughter he loved her. 

“ice cream?” “yeah i’ll go get some. i love you”

“are you tired?” “no!” “okay. i love you”

and so many more i love yous were sprinkled throughout the day.

jackhughes

liked by ynuser, _quinnhughes, colecaufield, and others

jackhughes off szn with my favourite girl🏝❤️

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ynuser she loves you so much😭❤️

_quinnhughes cutie

jackhughes me?

_quinnhughes uh no.

fan01 STOP THIS IS SO CUTE??

trevorzegras okay… now bring her back home i miss her

fan02 jack with a baby?? im cryinggg🥺😭

[rzyraffek]

Could you please do headcanons Slashers (like Michael, Brahms, Billy, The Sinclair brothers) as caregivers for their S/O who is an age regressor

Or headcanons for those Slashers when they find out their s/o is an age regressor?

Okay I acually went and educated myself on this topic for you my dear anon🥰🌼

if your uncomfortable with topic of age regression pls dont read that😭

So basically as far as I understand age regression means that somone acts like child due to some traumatic event??? And like they act childlike and participate in child typical activies (such as drawing with crayons, speaking like a toddler, drinking from bottles ect) if i make headcanon that don't make any sense im sorry! I have no experience with this topic! ALSO this is pure platonic! Age regression isn't a kink or a fetish!!

Slashers with age regressor y/n

Brahms Heelshire

Tbh y/n acting childish kinda woke up his inner child, CUZ HE LITTERALY GOT LOCKED IN WALLS IN AGE OF LIKE 10 so he kinda missed out on some fun stuff

100% plays hide and seek! Or tag! My man loves some good round of hide and seek, this place is huge! *insert british accent* "oh you little scallop... if I find you I will tickle you so hard..."

Question: age regression is like temporary or like forever thing? Like regressor acts like that when they are in bad metal state or just always? Bcs if always then it might be hard with Brahms, see he kinda.... has mommy's issues has huge need to be taken care of, probably similar to y/n's, he kinda wants a person who will just pamper him and make him feel like he's the single child yknow? All the attention on him? Yknow what i mean??

If y/n draws him something nice, dude will put it on a fridge with a magnet and be proud

If thats like temporary thing, he acaully will ask a lot of questions: how should he act? Do you remember anything? How does it work? Can he get some cuddles? Do you still love him while regressing? (Ofc you do, but he doest understand)

Billy Lenz

You guys vibe

Dude won't see any difrence😭

Yay one more reason to watch cartoons together! (His favorite ponny is rarity and fluttershy)

If y/n babytalks and uses toddler-like vocabulary... dude will mimic it😭 he just thinks that will help with communication😭 its not like you guys struggle with it or anything, Billy is just build like that

Yall draw together, his artstyle already looks like toddler drew it (not in cute way)

Plays dolls with y/n (but he acually makes it interesting! Like he makes it all dramatic and the tea is just jawdropping)

Also don't bother explaining what is age regression, just say "sometimes I act like kid to cope"😭

Micheal Myers

Judges

But kinda likes it, not in weird way! He enjoys taking care of y/n, but he has his own ways of doing so

He won't play with them or let them cuddle him too much

But he accepts little drawings and stickers that y/n gives him

He is still stalking them, making sure noone tries to bully them or anything

He is very protective, for example if y/n cuts their finger while making food, dude is all over them: Oh no no dont cry! Uhhh.... uhhh oh! See a pretty bandage? With puppies! Pls dont cry...

On rare days he is acually around (phicially i mean, cuz hes always around just not interacting with y/n) and it happens for him to be in good mood too, he will let y/n nap on him or put some stickers on his outfit- he never takes them of btw, the only reason that stickers wash of is the field he 'works' in? Yknow a lot of mud blood and water. He also holds y/n hand if they are spooked

And he fucking loves fluttershy and applejack

Steals some cute shirts and socks for them!

Sinclair Bros

Bo is the least understanding, tbh he will lisen to y/n only if they have very good relationship

Vince is just 👍

And Lester is acually very open to the idea

Drawing and playing dolls with Vincent

Going on cool drives with Lester

And napping with Bo

Whole fridge is covered in drawings and cute magnets

All Vincent's notebooks and Lester truck covered in stickers

Even Bo gun didnt escape the sticker apocalypse

Vince made special wax figurines for y/n

Lester calls them "kiddo" 😭😭

Bo puts his hand on their head and rubs it till their hair goes all puffy

They all act like older brothers who have to take care of younger siblings while perents are away😭😭

Vince acually vents to regressing y/n and they are just like: "man I just wanna pet the dog"

Bonus round! Added few more!!

Bubba Sawyer

Bestie vibes

Yall just spend time playing with dolls and drawing together

Absolutely lets y/n nap on him

He totally combs their hair and puts them in nice bun (or if y/n has short hair he will just brush it)

He kinda sees age regression as lil break from reality? Like you two can just vibe and act they way you want to😊 he enjoys, cuz tbh he do be acting like child(not in bad way!) And his happy that you both can do all those child-like activities without being judged by other person

Bit y/n once

Asa Emory

Ew a child

I mean

Idk he gives me "the dad that never has time for u cuz he has too much work"

Like yep he will read y/n a bed time story and he will tell them all about bugs and nature. But hes busy most of time

OMG ABOUT BED TIME STORIES Asa will read you one but he is so exhausted that he acually falls asleep first

He trusts them and knows that even whilr regressing they wont do anything dumb, but he still bans them from his 'workroom' theres... well some photos and drawings of victims and i doubt y/n wants to see it

Lets them sit on his lap while he reads newspaper like middle-aged man he is

Gives lil head kisses before sleep

Bug themed plushies and figures

Makes y/n watch animal planet and bbc nature with him

When he's out for longer periods of time he will buy them McDonald's as an apology

Welp

Done. I hope it makes sense! I never witnessed anyone age regress so idk how relatable it is!! I used x reader tags only to reach bigger audience

[forestryfae]

chaos lord hcs i consider canon cus thats what hc means lol

chaos lords tend to take a few traits after their familiars.

klarions pupils work the same way cats do. slits when hes relaxed, big and round when hes excited. he may purr on occasion but its usually only directed at teekl when shes snuggled into him. he likes to push things off of tables but thats not a familiar trait thing, he just saw teekl do it once and thought it looked fun.

child is cold to the touch and if the light hits her right her skin seems opalescent. her bones are partially transparent and looks like its made from opals and white quartz despite being solid bone

chaos lords need their familiars to be concious to stay properly on the mortal plane. thus, they need to sleep when their familiar is asleep. e.g. klarion wont ever discorporealize from teekl taking a catnap but he has the option of phazing in or out of the mortal plane for a while (annoying but harmless), waking her up (worse) or taking a nap w teekl (best choice)

in fact pretty much all chaos lords (and lords of order if the shoe fits) revolve their daily schedules around their familiars sleep schedules, despite familiars sleeping far less than normal animals

child cant sleep because of flaw. this does not affect her in the slightest.

sometimes klarion (specifically) will just drop dead. you know when cats loaf and suddenly their head just drops so theyre loafing face down and asleep? yeah, teekl fell asleep and klarion didnt notice and now hes fallen face first on the floor and is snoozing away. he could fall off the empire state building and not notice until after teekl wakes up

you cant wake him up. hes dead to the world until teekl wakes/is woken up and even then he might keep snoozing for a while before he wakes up on his own

vandal has, more than once, had to deal w his snoring during a meeting

his snoring isnt actually that loud if hes lying down properly. he tends to sleep like a cat tho. literally Wherever

lords of order generally dont have to be on the mortal plane very often and actively avoid it, unlike chaos lords who delight in being able to go, so its rarer for them to need anchors or familiars. nabu was basically their get out of work card

chaos/order lord language is mostly consistent of loud humming, hollow noises, and clear tones. the way electricity sounds, ice cracking, thunder rumbling, tuning forks, and so on also appear on occasion, and its easy to compare the noise they make to the sound of a planet spinning. there is a mild telepathic aspect of it used to convey mood and feelings as well. its like body language but psychich, and no actual words, thoughts or images are spoken psychically

its common to choose what noises are used based on favourite sounds and tones, hence the need for the telepathy. telempathy?? yeah thats a word now. gender is also linked to noises.

gender isnt really a thing the way it is for humans. sex as well, but genetics are. lords of whatever reproduce by deciding "i want a kid actually" and then manifesting a soul for that child. ideally you want between 2-5 lords manifesting at once so theres a variation in the powers used to bring them to life, if you only manifested a child from one lord youd just get a badly made copy of that lord.

manifesting a child is not seen as sexual, its more like witnessing a birth, so its not uncommon for children to just pop up out of nowhere in public. generally this has few reactions from others beyond congratulations. the knowledge of how to do it is still kept from children and young lords to prevent bad copies or irresponsible duplications from inexperience. not to mention that parenthood is kind of a big deal, you dont want a lord who was born last millennia try to make a shit duplicate, fail, and essentially rip themself in half, erasing them from existence

it is seen as. vulgar. to ask someone to help create a child. you generally say out loud "i want a child and need help" and suitors will offer their help. after that its pick or choose.

biological sex isnt a thing due to the way children are created, but gender still is there to some degree. some dont have one at all, while some have very strong feelings of it. its linked massively to noises and is seen as an accessory, like wearing a favourite bracelet or a cool tshirt. for some only hollow and humming tones is the perfect gender, for others low thundering rumbling with highpitched tones is excellent, and some might prefer using all the noises or stick to just one, and some may change periodically

physical bodies tend to be malleable enough to fix if they dont like what theyre given or alter if they change their mind, but they generally view genitals and sex characteristics as aestethic functions and do as they see fit based on what they feel looks nice and is more useful for them

nabu views the host body as just a host and therefore does not ever alter the host body. hes content w whatever he gets, he just lives there after all

lords of chaos and order have different dialects. its unclear to everyone else what the difference is though.

lords may take the soul of a mortal and turn it into a chaos lord/lord of order. this is called adoption :)

due to personal reasons, klarion may or may not be adopted depending on what backstory i want to use

(born as a chaoslord sometime between the beginning of the universe and roungly 5000 years before meeting vandal and was never human or anything else VS born in Limbo Town 2; The Adaption To Make It Less Lost Tribe Of Roanoke And More Homo Magi + Fae Cross Species From A Place Called Limbo Town, became a very powerful but chaotic magic user, chaos lord said "i want that one" and approaching him, klarion accepting and upon his death hell ascend, got murdered in cult ritual, became chaos lord and adopted by his mother (he has 2 now) and some time space power shit happens so he ascends into the past where his new mom who knows time chaos adopted him)

chaos lords are always red and lords of order are always yellow but the hue and saturation varies. some are more pink, some are kinda orange, some are blood colored, some have specks of different colors or ombres or stripes, some are very light or very dark, and so on etc etc

klarion has more than once refered to lords of order as "piss rocks from space"

[nanis4thewin]

Imma be honest…right now quackity seems like a busy man, meaning he doesn’t have so much time to spend with u so every moment u meet up with him, he makes sure he cherishes it.

very long happy and sometimes chaotic FaceTime with him while he travels

After a long week of travelling and jet lagged naps, he makes sure to give u all his attention and love

cuddling u and him ranting about how much he missed you even though you two facetime multiple times, everyday.🤷🏻‍♀️

sending each other silly pics of random things

if u know how to cook he’d beg to help you cook…and u say yes even if you have a bad feeling about it😍

ur instincts were somewhat correct and now your kitchen is messed up😭 it’s ok tho cus he helps u clean up💗

idk about u but I remember quackitys gingerbread stream with his tiger costume so just imagine that…but u two have matching onesies‼️‼️ (Yes I’m kinda in the Christmas mood already)

your gingerbread house either looks like a perfectionist made it, or it’s like a sequel to quackitys gingerbread house…

ok wait now I’m in a halloween mood

pulls up with a ridiculous costume but I feel like he would ask you to match him him during halloween

he would be very lowkey about it and hopes you say yes even though he knows your gonna say yes💀

if you and him are at the point where you’re both comfortable with sharing each other online then he’d definitely post you on his story🤗

uhhhh yah that’s all, sorry if it sounds rly clustered😭😭

quackity would ur little sad stinkin face as he gets ready to leave on a trips. Like u look like sat cat just looking at him not saying anything he’d just be like “🥲”. When he comes from trips he ALWAYS tries to give u his attention even if u dont ask for it.

defiantly he thinks u look so pretty on the computer laptop if u use a laptop <3 sososososo maybe pictures of u 2 doing dumb faces or sometimes when one of u guys say something weird. u guys make a ‘😟’ face. and alex would take a picture of it, and when u guys text and u say something rather concearing, he’e send that picture of u making that ‘😟’ face. Like using u as a reaction meme

this is how i’d imagine ur messages together <3 he’d totally want u to send him pictures of u, so he can see u everyday he’s gone.

if u cook with him on a stream or something. U’ll be doing all the cooking. Alex would just being watching say “look what i did guys!” while ur working ur butt off as alex just said “I made that :D!”

he’d think u look adorable in ur onesie. If u have s little tail on ur butt, he would tug on it , amd then giggling when ur like “WHAT THE HECK?!”. He would hug u around ur shoulders from the back because he liked to the the fluffiness of the onesie (and he likes hugs)

HE’D SHOWED UP IN THIS AND THE CONVO BETWEEN U GUYS WOULD GO LIKE

quackity:do u like my costume

you: yea its cute

quackity:…u know i have another one in the room if u like it so much 😚😚

and you’re like “jm good thanks 😙”. he wouldn’t ask u directly to put on the costume but small things he does woukd kinda make it obvio.”hey look! this couple did matching costumes! aha…. u know maybe we can do that to 🫣🫣🫣”

[janitor-figure-a]

transcript that might not be up to code under the cut

Austin: um

Ali: I just want to say, I'll probably edit this but, this is an important thing for Keith. The quarters is like a game thing that everybody can use during the down time and not a special place to describe your bedroom which is what i also thought it was

Dre: mmm

Keith: Oh no! Mine doesn't describe my bedroom mine describes that i become a bedroom

Austin:  oh okay, sure sure sure, okay 

Sylvi: (overlapping) oh cool!

Keith: yes

Austin: and a modest library

Many overlapping

Ali: (overlapping) people can enjoy it

 Keith: and a modest library, yes. 

Janine: wait what, a bedroom that,what

Keith:   Everyone is free to enjoy..

Janine:  a bedroom that people can what, i need to know

Keith:  do whatever there's a breakfast nook, there's a bookshelf

Austin:  Ali: Keith laughing

Austin:  you can't! 

Sylvi:  oh yeah man x2

Ali: the midnight sunset fanfic inside of Phrygian 

Janine:  oh god

Dre: oh boy

Keith:  on top of, around, i mean, i don't know, within??

Austin: on top of!

Dre: oh yeah i'm sure who’s on top is a very important part of that fanfic bud

Austin:  no one does it like us, i just wanna say

Sylvi:  also i feel 

Austin:  Im sorry yall have a tactical map but no other show has a character who can become a bedroom you can fuck in, soooo… That's probably not true somebody is probably doing it harder than us ill be honest

Dre: yeah that's in transformers for sure

Austin: god. Transformers, i dont go here, i don't go to transformers but transformers seems truly next level these days

Sylvi:  um, i have distinct memories over a decade ago my friend, my dear friend mike finding bad transformers fanfiction that had this basically happen 

Austin: shout outs

Sylvi:  with R2D2 and optimus prime 

Austin:  oh my fucking god

Janine:  what…

Austin: they could make it work

Keith: but did they transform into a bed or where they just..?

Janine: R2D2 can't transform,

Sylvi: i don't know how much i should get into honestly on the show, we’re already pushing it

Austin: we’re gonna move on

Keith: I just meant you could have cereal there! if you wanted, is what i meant

Austin: in the bedroom??!!!

Keith: There's a breakfast nook!

Austin: ah there's a breakfast nook

Dre: yeah yeah yeah, it's important

Janine: this is a studio apartment you could be a studio apartment

Keith: it’s a studio apartment, yes

Janine: okay

Austin: I do, I mean, here's the thing. The blue channel did not have a studio apartment in it before. This is serving a social function like, you know, sometimes you wanna hang out in the studio apartment. I live in a studio apartment. It's nice to be here, you know?

Keith: Everyone desires to take a nap in a weird bed. Right? Like a hotel room or ah, you go to an air bnb. 

Everyone loves spending a night in a bed that's not their normal bed. I think that that's, nearly universal

Austin: and that's one of the services we offer here, 

Keith: the blue channel has a extra bed that anyone can use

Austin: and it can change! It can presumably change the bed from day to day. It’s you!

Keith: yeah, it's like a mood ring

Austin: ah interesting

Keith: the genres on the bookshelf change

Austin: that’s fun

Keith: oh don't catch me on a non-fiction day 

Ali: laughs

Keith: oh do not, you do not wanna mess with Phrygian when the shelves are stocked with like, 

biographies

Austin: bad yeah bad mood i got you

[batshikns]

Check-up List #22

Daily To-Do's:

-Got to school with in a tolerable mood: ✔️

(Got up in a tolerable mood: N/A)

-Laughed and made someone laugh today: ✔️

-Didn't get/make someone mad/upset: ❌️

-Got home in a tolerable mood: ✔️

(Went to bed in a tolerable mood: N/A)

-Showered:✔️ (highscore: 15!!! )

-Took a walk: ✔️

-Planning to go to bed soon: ✔️

-Eat breakfast: ✔️

-Eat lunch: ✔️

-Eat dinner: ✔️

Today's To-Do's:

-Try my best on the math quiz: ✔️

-Tolerate school: ✔️

-Play BAD END THEATER: ✔️

Overall:

12/13

+ XP: Check-in with Dad and Pop: ✔️

+ 2× XP: Spend less time on the computer(phone): ❌️

+ 0.5 XP: Spend time out of your room: ✔️

13.5/13

Notes:

School was great, though i didn't do my WW work that is overdue now. I was able to get three games I really wanted; Signalis, ANNO: mutation, and BAD END THEATER.

I played BAD END THEATER with Pop and Dad, but I got a little overwhelmed and wanted to go to a game I've been really wanting to try(Signalis), but Pop didn't like those type of games(<- understandable) so he and Dad hopped off.

(I don't know if that's what made me upset and which made me upset more: I made Pop upset, or I didn't even ask in the first place and quit playing BAD END THEATER. Dad said he'd like to hear my experience from the game, but i dont Get It.)

Pretty sure I'm having a depressive episode right now(it's been a while, wow...), so i think i need to have some distractions and a cup of water, so I'll see what i can do ig.

Hope Pop and Dad are okay. I hope Pop wasn't upset. I hope I'll be okay.

I'm really tired.

Goals:

-Play BAD END THEATER with Pop and Dad

-Work on interview more(<- get slides 2-4 done)

-Take a nap

-Keep in mind that you're trying, even if Mom, Dad, or even yourself don't realize it yet and urge you to speed up the process

-Extra points: Check-in with Dad and Pop

-Double extra points: Spend less time on the computer(phone)

[ifthiswingscouldfly]

hello!! supporting ur matchup event. 💕 tysm for taking the time to do this- i love ur work hon!! ❤️

Outside Look: I am female (biologically as well). I am 5’4, brownish-blonde hair. I have blue eyes, pale skin, freckles on my face and dotted on my body. I am decently curvy- smaller chest but massive thighs lol.

Personality Traits: For the positives, I am generally very motherly. I dote on all of my friends and usually take the role of mediator. I am very creative and artsy- and love telling and recieving jokes. I’m always up for a good laugh!! As for my negative traits, I can be a bit sensitive. Not overly, but a bit. I am very emotional, and need reassurance sometimes. Once again I’m not a case but I def need it. I will eat massive amounts of food which is not at all good for anyone credit card. I zone out a lot and have the coordination of a brick. 😍🙌

Likes: BANANA BREAD 🙌, picnics, naps, just chilling, history and reading, and rain/snow 🩵

Dislikes: Large insects, hot weather, humidity, anything having to do with Joanns Fabrics. Idk why i hate that store so much

MBTI: INFP-T

Zodiac Sign: Pisces :)🩵

Love Language: Quality Time + Physical Touch (giving), Words of Affirmation + Physical Touch (recieving)

Aesthetic: I dont have a specfic one, but anything to do with messy beauty and/or plants. 100% plant mom.

oo i forgot but nsfw and sfw head canons please!! i am 19. :)🩷

i hope this is plenty of info, good luck going through any of it, and thank you!!! have a wonderful day ❤️❤️

°•☆°•☆°•☆°•☆°•☆°•☆°•☆°•☆°•☆°•☆°

Hello @aeripq ❤ I hope you're doing good.

I appreciate your support and kindness btw. Thank you for being patient.

I match you with......

Leonardo

Pre-relationship (SFW)

Well, in the beginning Leonardo acted like a tease towards you like in everything but not in a bad way. Whenever you see him around he would joke and try to light up the mood because he loves doing that.

He also was light-hearted when you took his jokes well. In order to gain your trust he had to make sure you're not afraid of him and this would include taking you to town so you can see Paris in that time period.

Also he wanted to make sure that everywhere you exist he would be there. Like if you're in the library cleaning he would be there. Etc...

He just wanted to make sure that you get to use to him and his presence.

Confession (SFW)

Obviously you both grow to like each other because of your similarities and because Leonardo at some point caught your attention as well.

That night around 8 p.m after having dinner and helping sebastian with the chores you felt a bit of unease so you went to the garden of the mansion to have a walk and think of how much your life changed since you came in here. And as expected Leonardo followed you there and asked if everything is alright. You told him about what you felt and he hugged you to give you a sense of relief it was all sweet and dreamy at first but then you realized how hot your cheek was. Of course the genius knew. And to ease that he tried to change the subject and talk about other things but obviously your eyes didn't leave him alone.

You literally was talking to him through eye language of how much you like him and giving him the I want you and I want to be with you look.

Ex.

It was obvious for him what you want but he really was in a denial state because of the intense feeling he felt towards you. "Cara mia your eyes saying it all" he said " Saying what?" You asked in husky tone of voice, like you didn't already know that. "You're making it seem like it is easy for us" He said exchanging the same look you give him "Well, it is" you lowered your voice looking at the green grass shyly. "You don't have to hold back" you told him looking up at him. " I don't want to". And then he broke the distance taking you in his arms and kissing you right on your lips. Your hands was on his chest and to reach his lips you had to stand on your tip toes. You smiles to him as he said "I love you" and it was the most beautiful thing you heard in your life.

Relationship headcanons (SFW)

Quickly, Leonardo understood your personality and your behaviors after just being with you for a short period of time. He became fond of your every little detail. How you eat, walk, sleep and even your reactions. He just can't stand a day that passes without spending a little bit of it with you. Not in a clingy way of course but he'll just make sure that both of you spend time with each other and courage you to be the best version of yourself.

He would really appreciate your motherly behavior and the way you're friendly with plants and animals. Also he would be around when you bake the banana bread to help you. Or maybe he will just make it as a surprise when he is out in town and picking some for you "Hey Cara mia I just found your delicious meal, here's it". He have no problem in dragging you everywhere with him or taking you on picnics to enjoy the nature together.

At night he would enjoy the discussions you make with him about any topic tbh because he is knowledgeable and know almost everything, while you both in his bed cuddling and just enjoying the warmth together.

Leonardo 100% will be aware of your phobia of insects and he will try to make sure that you don't face any.

Another thing is he won't mind you playing under the rain/snow. It is just so attractive that you enjoy life in every detail.

And the fact that you're a motherly girl is so soothing and reassuring for him that he would never leave such a treasure.

Relationship headcanons (NSFW)

He is so skilled ommgg. He can turn you on and flip you around like a coin. And when he is in love he is so damn horny. Anything you do will just make him amazed. And don't get me started on how much he get jealous but he won't even say. Because he doesn't want you to think that he is possessive or anything.

Well, I can see that bath sex is a thing here to be honest. One evening you were tired because you got involved with a party sebastian throw up for Napoleon's birthday and went to your room to rest. For a brief moment Leonardo already was behind your back and asked you if you want him to help you relax. You agreed and he suggested to take a bath with him. In the beginning it was so innocent you both took your clothes off and set enjoying the hot water. And then the fun eventually started. He started to massage you back and then his hands went from you back to your breasts and you started to moan. One hand on your breast massaging it and the other circles your sensitive bud between you legs and after that you turned your back and started a make out session while you ride him. Both of your moans and groans became so loud that you both had to deal with the teasing next day.

Also I can see that he would be into cock-warming and morning sex but the second one won't be daily.

He is yearning whenever he don't spend enough time with you and sometimes you both will get used on quickies because of not having enough time with each other.

Another thing is he is really into doggy position and is a huge turn on for him. Being exposed and vulnerable in front of him so he can take the lead is so enticing.

Obviously, he is the dominant one in the relationship and the bedroom as well. But if you prefer taking the lead he would like that.

At first both of you was kind of shy and awkward but you grew to like each other more in a sexual and physical way.

Possible conflicts:

Well it is known that he is a pure-blood vampire and you're a human so it would be difficult for him to turn you into a vampire. What if you don't want to? What if you hated him for doing it?. What if the eternity wasn't enough to love you?. What ifs killed his poor mind and the negative thoughts kept going back to him.

Possible match:

Le Comte De Saint Germain and Vincent Van Gogh

°•☆°•☆°•☆°•☆°•☆°•☆°•☆°•☆°•☆°•☆°

☆ Note:

Thank you for reading my match up.

The ask box will be open until 20th/Jun/2023.

Comment your thoughts below and inform me if you want specific things.

*Follow me for more

M 🤎

[blushingdread]

Some fun facts about my oc Guy!!

Guy is mostly made up of people in their 30s-40s but they dont have a real age. Usually they just say they're middle aged and leave it at that

Due to mostly being made up of men Guy is very chill with being referred to as he, the "they" part of his pronoun set doesn't refer to being multiple people it refers to the female parts of him

Guy is very much more than the sum of their parts, due to having so many different perspectives their view of themself and the world is colored by all of them

None of the parts that Guy is made up of have all of their memories intact so if he gets flashbacks or memories or anything they're usually bits and pieces that don't have all the details colored in

Guy is technically a collection of most of the more stable parts into one person, but there still are plenty of fragments around that sometimes comment on what Guy is doing based on their own view point. They're usually a quiet mumbling always in the back of his head, but they can get extremely loud or silent

Technically due to the fact that Guy is mostly liquid with only a very solid outer casing, if a part of them really wanted to leave they could. I have thought about that happening if Guy has to pick Pat over revenge, because not all of them would agree with that, but they would return. Not because revenge is bad, but revenge at the detriment of others and yourself is bad

Guy has an extremely scattered thought process and mind, that's at it's worst when he is first freeded and slowly gets better as Guy becomes less of a collection and more of a single person. But due to this depending on his mood he takes a while to understand things and is generally kind of foggy. Things that have a lot of memories attached to them can trigger this as well

Most of Guy's parts were parents and they always kinda are wishing to go back and get their kids but they can't really remember them and they aren't the same person anymore, Guy is constantly feeling guilty at thinking that they're filling a hole with Pat, but then they remember that Pat is a unsupervised child in a hell hole and goes back to being the world's most over protective dad

Guy gets hella mood swings and is constantly a buzz with emotion, he's usually annoyed about it and can control it easily but in tense situations he tends to think with his heart

If Guy had access to a note book they'd probably keep a list of everything Pat has told them in there. Guy is very attentive because Pat is literally a babie and they have SO many dad instincts they instantly kick when Pat so much as sneezes

Guy knows a lot of random shit due to being a mix of multiple different people and has a lot of random skills. He barely understands it himself

The only reason that Guy doesn't carry Pat everywhere is because she asked him not to and that's literally it

Pat calls Guy dad and they start crying because the baby

Guy ends up stealing anything soft from wherever in the labs so Pat has somewhere soft to sleep

Guy is pretty self conscious about the way they look but only when it comes to the idea of children being scared of him

He is actually very soft!! Their body is fairly tough but kinda like a water bed?? What I'm saying is that he's nice to nap on, pat can confirm

They eventually end up owing a #1 dad mug from Pat, they adore it

Guy's body is pretty stretchy so they can lengthen their arms or open their shoulder mouth to swallow a guy whole or use their tongue to catch someone. He is very malleable

Guy's vision isn't the best because the way his eyes form they're just kinda blurry. It's not bad enough to stop him but he does struggle to read anything far away or small stuff

They don't need to wear clothes but they like to. The normalcy of clothes is comforting to them

Only the mouth on Guy's shoulder can be used for eating, the one on Guy's face is only used for talking and it is filled with the thick black liquid substance that makes up most of Guy's body. Guy could stick something in there if they really wanted to but it would be like pushing a pencil though barely softened clay. It's difficult so he doesn't bother

[flashdrivegarbage]

My youngest sister is nine and she’s cooking and its a beautiful experience because she loves it and she doesn’t have to she just wants to and she’s having fun and gaining new experiences and learning about a new aspect of the world that we live in in an environment that is safe and friendly and nonjudgmental where there are no consequences if she fails other than maybe some laughing about it and a lesson on how to fix it next time and a hug from mom and dad

But all i can think about being eight years old and having to learn how to make pancakes on the griddle and scrambled eggs and pancakes and grilled cheese and pasta and having to make dinner for my siblings and if i failed then i had to try again because my mom was never home and my dad was in pain and tired and in a bad mood and taking a nap and if i got a burn i ran cold water over it and ignored it unless it was bad enough to actually be unbearable and if i didnt succeed me and my siblings didnt have dinner that night and im so happy my sister gets this experience but im mourning the fact that i never got it myself and that i dont think ill ever be able to enjoy cooking because of how i was introduced to it and how my passion for it that i had as a kid was spoiled by the heavy weight of responsibility thrust onto me when i was way to young to bear it

[predoom]

ohoneohone

Sunday, October 23rd, 2005 9:42 am you see that kid... its not me, its you. blow out the candles on caring. encounters yesterday: went to paul walls jewelry shop. pretty insane. then when we played jared leto came over and watched. radio shows are wack. encounters today: the gold medal gymnast from the 2004 olympics is coming to hang out with me. pretty insane. why would you ever want to meet a boy like me. i am boring. you make it easier to make the decisions that i do. i turned off the switch that cares. i watch lots of movies and take lots of naps. cause i am a baby. i am gonna be in the academy video for black mamba. i can't tell you how excited that makes me. Wednesday, October 19th, 2005 11:48 pm ill be on time for that, i cant think of a line that rhymes with that blue looks better than jealousy. im awake but not up. you know what i mean. blew the speakers out like a candle. drowned out my sorrows in a wet dream. i miss you but only in flashing moments. new stuff over at buzznet. people been asking about the prices. honestly we charge what it costs us to make. alot of the stuff lately has been cut and sew or requires hand stitching which is expensive. so we try to keep the stuff really limited, so that it stays special. the bags sold out in a day. we won't be making anymore of that particular bag. but we will be making more limited bags and other items. Tuesday, October 18th, 2005 4:48 pm i, peter lewis kingston wentz, solemnly swear... im trying to figure it out. my head moves way faster than my mouth. i went to a party at chris from nsnyc's house for a party. it was about as good/bad as you would think. except dirty was there. so factor that one in. always up or down, never down and out.

the new nightmare of you record is fantastic. it makes me think of winters at home. love it or leave me. Sunday, October 16th, 2005 12:45 pm baby, im just bad news i don't know if it feels real been watching halloween movies lately to get me in the mood taking lots of naps its easier this way she wont ever love you the way she loves me youre not pretty enough and you dont make her heart beat been hiding messages in morse code and anagrams banging my wrist against the edge of the keyboard until it turns black and blue we're all settling all the time panic! at the disco makes me want to start this all over again coversations with you make me want it to never have begun at all nick plan and william beckett are on the list in one form or another always if you dont have your friends than you dont got shit and my friends are gold halloween is gonna be the best this year i think ive never been in california on halloween- it once was, but it hasnt been for a really long time spent most of the morning on the phone with my mommy cause she can always slow my breathing down you can get used to anything after a while even this, pete pretty boys for secret girls later skater Wednesday, October 12th, 2005 12:02 pm ill make you shake so hard you might not make it through the night new york city is fucking insane. get me. bruisa. fall makes me remember and want love.

okay okay cause i should:

1. you say crazy shit in your sleep, like about us living in old milwaukee. 2. right this second "wonderwall" sometimes star wars. 3. i dunno cherry coke flavored. 4. sugar tail, freckles in your eyes, basement windows, braces 5. new years on the windowsill. 6. uh kind of in a weird way the retriever head on the beagle body. just the nicest dog ever. 7. that one bane lyric, im pretty sure its a question. but mostly lately- what happened to my best friend?

nick york city. the clan party last night was rightious. im kinda going other places. feeling it. quit sleeping on it cause im the life. from the back of my legs to the back of my neck- im so glad there are people out there who won't let me fall off the face of the planet.

young.

panic at the disco at the knitting factory in new york tonight- 5pm. Tuesday, October 11th, 2005 12:57 am you remind me of this one movie. it makes me smile. but not with my mouth and way too many teeth. but with my eyes. trouble loves me. but you do way more. im dreaming on highway lines and phone hang-ups. just happy to be me. for one second.

i got a sweet vest and some teddy bear shoes. im good for cuddling. youre gonna have to trust me on that one. Sunday, October 9th, 2005 7:38 pm sometimes its hard to remember the great moments. but you remember everything to a detail the moment everything goes wrong. your ims are crazy: i am still not dead or married. im bringing home on the road.

silly. never ccccchhhhange. 12:12 pm you could almost make me an honest man. what i have spent the weekend thinking:

good friends in nyc sometimes my eyes are red and green but not like christmas. just kind of a mess. even when the worlds underwater you're rowing in my wet dreams. everything you know about me is totally wrong because it comes from choruses and camera flashes. you come in flashes in the middle of the night or in the morning. fix me in fourtyfive. everything she thinks you know about me is totally wrong because i can't say anything i mean ever. i say things just to hurt you. i get the job done but it doesn't look pretty. Saturday, October 8th, 2005 12:24 am you win some, you lose some sometime you wake up in the morning and everything is just different. moodcontroller gets turned off. probably on by someone else. the bottom of my pants are wet from running through puddles. the streets of albany got let in on some of my secrets. swoon. its weird how when you stand next to the sun you cant notice anything else. then the lights go out and all of a sudden there is beauty everywhere. im always too little, too late. one day everyone finds something they can hang on to. the bottom line is im all wishes and luck. and thats how its always been. in the tides of the streets. dreaming about beautiful babies. with batting eyelashes and huge eyes. we were never supposed to know. im the golden boy. you are my golden ticket. but the tides always going out. and two months turns into two years. in the blink of an eye. youre never home. the stars look the same from the gutter. pens running low just to keep up with the tolerance. ive got big plans for new years. and thats a way off but its the only way to keep my mind off of the way things go. just know "you're not the lifeforce" pete and thats what keeps heartsbeating at night. i only thought you were someone else. a simple case of mistaken identity. romantic fraud. new york city. im always on. Wednesday, October 5th, 2005 4:40 pm hateitorloveit-theunderdogisbackontop sickest afterparty in newyorkcity. hopefully i can fly a friend or two in so i dont hide out in the corners all night. nick thinks my lj entries have been kinda wack lately. i can't say i dont agree. i am a total baby. but not a baby like usher sings about. we're making some super sick limited bartskull nikes. im tired as usual. rumor of the day: i pretty much only like sxe girls. you make me laugh too much with the stuff that gets written on the internet sometimes. my life is radical sometimes. maybe ill really update this later. i dont even know. congratulations to panic at the disco for having the sickest first week numbers ever. that band is the new everything. late at night thats pretty much what i have to listen to or i dont feel okay. this morning i got a strange phonecall to end a strange dream. bane. Tuesday, October 4th, 2005 9:22 pm "someday we'll be nostalgic for this second..." im tired. red thread. baby blues. im a mess. lovable, not that likeable. lemme hum you a sweet one. i know ive been in a rut. the underdogs back on top. im writing this story. but i wouldnt bet on the ending. sometimes this thing has become too big to even think about. but sometimes i wake up in the morning and it feels like something is missing. youknowyouknow. 6:57 pm the secret to my suckcess pinchme. dear friends, you let me fall off. i forgive you though. if you forgive me. i am out of my head. me and nick have cooked up the sickest idea ever. i am writing a movie with patrick. my tummy hurts most of the time. major disappointment, reporting for duty. wtf. sometimes OMG! i heart the drama. sometimes OMG! i do not. like emeralds just past the sun- green but not the sick inside more like the film warming up to you. the camera is waking up. little boys and girls- get up. the trouble has lifted. youre gonna be okay. "tell me that you're alright". i like wearing your clothes. they are like a bulletproof vest. mostly i miss my friends and chicago. i want to bring you all out on the road.

"...idonthavetobethekingoftheworld, as long as im..."

peace out. i need to take a nap and eat some icecream. i bought nicholas scimeca a present. im tired. act suprised, even if you're not. fake the words. say i love you hard like you hate me. Saturday, October 1st, 2005 4:48 pm life on mars by david bowie reminds me of you the dreams i have for me are just for us. i am not sure i even know what this means. the pros and con are the same. legs tangled. its the kid you loved forever. i got a feeling what they're all saying. under the spotlight you think about the inside of wedding rings. in dark bunks you think about the inside of zippers. make me yours. make me come to life. honestly. black hair and batted eyelashes. dont give up im not sure where this is all going. right on reds and at altars. thinking about the way you are with the little pudgy boy. im getting this sweet tat. she knows what im talking about. Sunday, September 25th, 2005 7:29 pm the spaces in your hand were designed to fit my fingers dear world,

i have actually been sleeping late. i think it's not cause i am depressed. rather i just need to catch up on a couple of years. i think that the last while of my life is perfectly represented in the movie "closer". not to have a whine tasting... but. the point of saying that is more- i got the chance to show some of my friends our new video the other day. and in watching it, i am really stoked that one story comes through. there is this girl in it and she loves this guy just for who he is. and they aren't the prettiest or the coolest- but the thing they have is awesome. and perfect. it made me smile to see it come across. demar for pres. 2008. my bestfriend left town yesterday. totes devistation. summer bummer. blender is throwing a little afterparty that william beckett will be djing. if youre on the g-list you will be dancing. i am going to corpse bride tonight. i lost my crackers seeing p!atd live. they gave me the balls to make some decisions. im thinking about having all my body hair waxed off because it seems particularly offensive. you dont even wanna see what ive got planned for halloween.

preview: www.infect.buzznet.com bi curious: www.clandestine.buzznet.com

my body isnt yours anymore so you dont have a say in what i do with it. im this creature that resembles me but im something different.

[aitian]

1/29 3:37pm

sitting in dad's office after class. feel like trash. better to say it here than keep complaining to ppl.

struggling so much w rumination & anger after all these bad experiences. i dont even think abt things from the past. it's more abt anticipating current & future problems. my brain turns into a puddle of thoughts trying to prepare me to perform. it doesn't help.. just makes me more angry & sad. brings down my mood so much & i can't get work done. dad tried to give me a pep talk today that its best to accept things for what they are when we hit a wall, & truly get interested in the things we have to do. on one hand it feels stupid to me to love the bullshit, & on the other hand ik im shaming & disrespecting my own life if i hate what i do.

reddit says rumination an ocd trait. theramintrees youtube videos say its a symptom of abuse. reddit also says my sense of alienation is an autism trait. i think these r just normal responses to my living conditions.

feel rly sad & don't want to do my work. take a nap.

[echoloading]

rant about helpfulness

I’ve recently been napping a lot and a friend of mine is saying that it’s bad for my sleep schedule. On the one hand, yes, it keeps me up longer at night, but on the other hand, I’m going to sleep when my body tells me I need to?? And so sure I’m napping bc I’m up late bc i napped, but it’s like… wtf do you want me to do??? I am not going to labor through being on the verge of sleep mid-afternoon, I’m going to lay down and take a nap, and then eat when dinner is ready, and then do homework until too late and then go to sleep, wake up, go to school, come home, repeat. It’s not like I’m like having a debate in my head about why i should or shouldn’t take a nap. I’m falling asleep so I nap. And I don’t really wanna fucking hear it, i know my sleep schedule is fucked and I’ve resigned myself to that until I can rearrange my room. (These are connected I promise.)

idk i guess its like… okay yeah what do you want me to do about it. ???

yeah it’s not helpful for my sleep schedule but with homework I don’t have the capacity or willpower to fix it, so if you have a better idea THROW IT AT ME. But everything is interconnected and so i need to reorganize my room bc rn i dont have a desk but I need to clean to put the desk in and i need to move stuff and once the desk is in then I can do my homework right when I get home so then I can sleep earlier so I’m not tired all the time so I don’t need to take naps so I won’t stay up late.

and I don’t have the TIME to rearrange and clean my room because I have to do HOMEWORK and I have to be in the right MOOD and I can’t get comments from my family about it because that’ll make me not want to DO IT and AGGHHHHHH.

so yeah. I love her to death and she’s awesome and i know she’s coming from a place of trying to be helpful, but sometimes it really gets on my nerves especially with something like this. It’s already a topic that puts me on edge because it’s so difficult and frustrating for me, and so to then get criticized for something that helps me get closer to enough sleep altogether it’s like. Just let me have this.

[ayakinari]

you ever just

[bisexual-ashe]

.