I was just reading a pjo fanfiction (as one does) and Will was scolding people on not getting enough sleep. And I realised that lots of the the time Will is portrayed as the only character who sleeps. Like.
NO.
This boy gets no sleep. At all. He watched his older brother get slaughtered. And most of his cabin died. And he was forced into a leadership role at a young age. And he lived through two wars. And he’s a healer.
is it weird to feel more safe in your own misery ? i dont want to recover for me being « normal » is losing my identity and my character. when i used to be drained mentally i knew what i wanted. i had real desires and things that makes me happy i had things that makes me sad but not im completely numb and boring like now. i hated life so much but yet it was my only source of warmth. my mental issues make me feel miserable but yet it brings me comfort and whenever i find myself getting a bit better i sabotage myself so that i dont feel empty and numb.
it's not weird or uncommon, people find comfort in sadness, you can even flee certain responsibilities. people around you stop expecting you to make an effort. it all depends on what kind of life you want. but being sad is not your identity. it can be part of who you are (currently, or forever) but there are many other things that define you.
i have my own little corner of hell, i know what you mean. it takes so much effort to even try to get out, it's sometimes easier to give in, get cosy. but you have to try, for the sake of the people around you.
Guys, if I see a boosty link in your profile, I won't communicate with you. Because boosty belongs to my.com, and my.com belongs to vkontakte - a prorussian social media which belongs to kremlin. I heard, about 10% of income which artists get from boosty, goes as tax from this company, therefore, by financing through boosty, you finance genocide and rapes.