#and i told him about the cousin who taught me some things a 4 year old shouldn't be doing but i have sympathy for her bc again

[daedrabela]

sometimes i'll just be chilling with my bf and i start talking about something weird that happened to me as a kid/when i was younger and it turns out that was a whole ass trauma and then we sit there looking at each other like 😮

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Okay so my mother currently has custody of my cousins and has since they were babies, they are now 5 and 7. I still live at home with them. We are all just about blindingly white, but the boys are mixed race, the younger looks white but the older really does not. (This is very relevant)

My sister thought it was funny to try and teach them to "oink" at police officers and I said absolutely not he does not look white he cannot get away with that you're going to get him hurt and she got mad and said I was being racist for saying that.

My mother and sisters father have been teaching them that police officers are good guys and only hurt people who have either "ruined their own lives with drugs" or people who "are shooting at them first". I made some disbelieving humming sounds and my mother yelled at me in the restaurant that that wasn't funny but honestly I wasn't trying to be funny I think it's actively dangerous to be teaching them that nowadays especially to a child who is very clearly not white. My mother and my sisters father think that teaching them that police officers are heroes will make them be respectful towards laws and police officers but I think they should also be wary of them to a degree as they get older, and I understand that they're young and don't really need to know that yet but I think that it's worse to teach them they're heroes and then turn around and tell them the truth of what police do nowadays, and I doubt things will change enough in the next 4 or so years that they won't need to be taught it at all unfortunately.

I have told the boys when no one else was around that a lot of cops now do things they really shouldn't and should not be hero worshipped, but that they need to behave extra well around them. I did not go into any detail.

I feel extremely weird being the one to say it as a white person and am worried I'm going about it wrong, but they really only see the other side of their family a few times a year and I feel like they do need to know to be cautious and pretending they don't could endanger them.

Am I the asshole for this? I understand why they don't want to tell the boys and I do worry im not doing this right as a white person but I feel like it's not safe not to

[latenightbreezeinheaven]

Natal aspects from my natal chart + my personal experiences (planets in houses) *Part-1* ☃️

First of all, these are my experiences due to my personal placements in my natal chart so please take them with a pinch of salt. They are not facts. Every placement has good and bad sides and I’m not an astrologer too.

Saturn in 1st house

🖤Since I was a child, I was taught to be able to stand on my own feet and stay alone. My mother said she tried to stay away from me both physically and mentally as possible as she could because she was afraid that I would be too much emotionally attached to her. I was extremely soft and I relied on my parents at that time, so they didn’t want me to grow up as a weak person. That’s why I never tried again to rely on my parents, mostly emotionally because I know that I am the only one who has to pull myself up again and they aren’t.

🖤I have issues with my self-image and appearance, especially my body, since I was about 12 or 13. I feel like I’m not beautiful and I don’t meet up to this generation’s beauty standards.😐

🖤According to my mother, I started talking at about 3 or I guess even 4. It’s considered a bit late compared to my cousins and my brother. I don’t know if this placement is related to my talking stages but my speech was delayed and it was at the first stage of my life so yeah.🤷🏻‍♀️

🖤I think I’m responsible for every matter that happens around me even though I didn’t cause them.

🖤My parents have expected me to take care of my brother and his needs since I was about 10 and he was 5. I had to console him whenever he cried and I had to feed him, cook for him when they worked etc. They put too many responsibilities on my shoulders from the start so I wasn’t really carefree as a child.

🖤I’m also extremely hard on myself. I want to be perfect in every scenario and I feel this need to come out as a strong and independent person.

🖤My mother told me that when I was a newborn baby, I already looked like a 3-year-old kid. My facial appearances looked mature and till now, a lot of people still think I’m a lot older than I really am.😭

🖤My parents, especially my mom is really strict and they also have very high expectations on me. I feel judged by them quite often even when I’m doing well academically.

🖤They are also conservative, especially my mom. She yells at me whenever I tell her that I want to have a boyfriend but I don’t want to marry him and I will just live together and sleep with him. (It’s quite forbidden in our country and publicly considered as something we shouldn’t do).😂

🖤I am prone to anxiety. I often have anxiety attacks and I bite nails a lot too.

🖤Saturn also conjuncts my ascendant, so people also often tell me that I have prominent high cheekbones and I also think it’s true. But jawline? My jawline doesn’t look Capricorn rising-nish. I’m not also tall and slim. Actually, my body depicts exactly what a cancer rising with a cancer stellium would look like.

Lilith in 1st house

💃I’m not sexualized directly by men but every man I’ve met always wanted to chat with me about sex only. It’s really weird because my friends also have boyfriends but none of their boyfriends treats them like a sex toy. And I feel like a sex toy among those guys. They don’t want to take me out on dates and instead, they just want sex. I can’t tell if that is “sexualization” but I also get comments about my body a lot in both positive and negative ways.

💃Anyways, apart from men, I get stared a lot, not in a sexual way but in a more curious way like I’m an alien or some mythical creature popped out of a 13th century novel book.😂😭

💃I was also outcasted by my friends most of the times because they thought I’m too slutty (they said it themselves behind me). My ex friends bullied me and slut-shamed me so I have become a bad bitch since then. That’s why I don’t really care about friends in my life. They’re not my priority. Normally, I’m really bubbly and friendly but at times, my bitchy side comes up and forces me to stay detached from friends and never trust them.

💃Another thing I experience is I always have problems with authority figures. I hate it when someone uses their power to win something unfairly. But on the other hand, I’m secretly in love with authority and power because I want to own them and use them in a good way.

💃Some people also tell me that when they make an eye contact with me, they feel intense and intimidated but also warm and comforted at the same time (probably my cancer rising again lol).

💃I’m rebellious and I love weird outfits which are different from others.

💃I’m a bit open-minded when it comes to sexual matters (except when some random guy talks about sex out of nowhere for like 3 hours straight). I don’t feel ashamed to discuss about sex education whereas my friends see that as a taboo topic in the society.

💃I hate my body when I can’t fit into some outfits that I love but I love to touch it a lot and I also love to sleep naked (except I can’t sleep naked anymore after my parents found out about that).😭😭

💃However, the room doesn’t go silent when I enter. I’m not that powerful though.

💃I also don’t care about what other people think about me. It’s like “fuck off” vibes coming out from me since I got bullied.

Moon in 3rd house

📚People tell me I’m smart. I don’t get compliments about how pretty I am but I get ones about how intelligent I am. However, I don’t really think I’m THAT smart but maybe almost. HAHAHHAH😝

📚I love to express myself by writing out on a paper or on websites or on apps like this. I just love to turn my emotions into sentences and sometimes they turn into short stories. Writing releases my stress.

📚I love to write and read a lot. A book, a cat and gallons of iced coffee are enough for me in a day.

📚By traveling, I gain knowledge, inspiration and happiness. It’s my stress reliever for all time.

📚I love to ride cars too (I know it’s weird but I even had a childhood dream in which I live in a van and travel around the country).

📚I love my brother a lot and I have a very affectionate and friendly bond with him. I also try so hard to get along well with my cousins and stay friendly with them even though they’re a bit fake.🙄

📚Back to my brain. My primary teachers always complimented me about my intelligence and my grades and I was always the one who got first prize in every year for 5 years straight. Not bragging but it’s true.🤣

📚My moods change very often and my mind is scattered. It’s like a wide field with multiple places to hide and suddenly, a clown shows up from nowhere out of the blue! For instance, at first, I’m on instagram. Then after a minute, I remember to reply dms so I go onto messenger. Then, not even a minute later, I’m on TikTok again. Then, I’m on Reddit. It’s like soooo scattered that I don’t even know how to describe. I think my anxiety attacks also come from this placement.

📚I’m not grounded. I like to meditate but I can’t be consistent about it because of my intrusive thoughts. I jump from one topic to another very quickly when I talk.

📚I’m not a very good listener. I’m always ready to talk about various topics. So if I listen to someone very patiently, then he/she is important to me or I’m going to ghost them soon so I’m being patient in the present time loll😭

📚I overthink a lot and I tend to forget about a lot of things too. On the other hand, I also have a photographic memory about certain events like how my mom breastfed me. I remember what she wore and how she looked very vividly although I was just about 1 or 2 at that time but I don’t remember what I ate as a breakfast this morning. Strange right?

📚I love to learn foreign languages because they challenge me and intrigue me!

📚I’m also curious about everything and often have questions like “how were the oceans created?” “were Adam and Eve real people or just myth?” and my thoughts spiral into a big infinite hole and I get detached from the reality and my eyes are like 💀DEAD💀.

📚I also tend to turn my emotions into a problem to be solved instead of accepting and dealing with them. I observe me and my feelings from the third party view and respond to them logically. It’s not that I’m not emotional but I rationalize my feelings from another perspective.

📚I love to contain full stops, exclamation marks, question marks at the end of every sentence. If someone doesn’t do that, I judge them secretly LMAO.😭

Jupiter in 3rd house

🪄You can say that I’m quite lucky when it comes to education. I stand out among others since I was a child due to my education success. My parents could also support my education financially unlike right now, they’re struggling for my brother’s.

🪄I am a quick learner and I have a large vocabulary. I love to use advanced words in my language (Burmese).

🪄I am also quite talkactive but only with people I’m comfortable with. However, most of the time, I get into trouble for talking too much. I spill all the tea without any intentions but that drags me into a big mess and that’s why I have to control myself a lot when I communicate with someone, not to share gossips or else I’ll be in trouble again.

🪄Most of the times, people think I exaggerate a lot but I don’t.

🪄I hate HATE misspellings. They irritate me Periodt.

🪄I’m also open-minded and not afraid to observe from other perspectives. But my beliefs are so strong like try to attack them and I’ll kick you out of my life forever.🦵🏼

🪄I love learning about various things and I also like to be seen as a nerd. As long as I’m learning something, I feel valuable and precious.

🪄I prefer intelligence to beauty. When I say intelligence, it’s not only about studies but also about the keys in communication, how to eat and drink with manners, how to fight back people with wits etc. I’m quite of a sapiosexual. I get turned off when someone doesn’t know about something they should know. I get turned on when someone is intelligent and knows exactly how to talk to someone. Appearances matters too but not very important as long as they have brains.🧠

🪄I also love to see arguments (not in an aggressive way) and I always guess why they have their own opinions by trying to be in their shoes. And I get turned on when someone I already admire gets passionate in intellectual arguments wisely.🥵

Pluto in 6th house

⚡️I love hardworking people and I also try hard to perform well in my daily routines. I put efforts even into tiny cases.

⚡️I have a very strong will when it comes to my career and I hate being told what to do. I’m still at college so I have zero experience about work places but I think I would be obsessed with my work because that’s how I imagine myself to be.🤓

⚡️When I get emotional, I try to stay as productive as I can and I shift my focus onto my daily routines, my studies and my ambition to suppress them. I know it’s bad but I can’t deal with all of them. Emotions are weakness for me.

⚡️I love and hate routines at the same time. My Gemini sun and 3rd house moon hate them but my Virgo moon and 6th house Pluto love them.

⚡️I get stressed out a lot when my routines are ruined. For example, I even feel like my life is a mess if I didn’t finish some work in a limited time. I want to cry when I’m not productive and I go on self-destruction mode if I feel like that. I waste more time if I know I’m not doing enough. And then I cry. And the cycle repeats. So, the only way to keep myself happy is to stay productive and to be perfect in every work I do.

⚡️I’m also very competitive among my peers (my mars Aries doubles it).

TW: Eating disorder

⚡️I hate diets and workouts (I don’t know if this is related to Pluto in 6th house though). I have three personal planets in hard aspect to Pluto. I also have an eating disorder. I’m trying to maintain my balance again but it falls back every time. Either I binge or I restrict shockingly. There’s no in-between. Right now, I’m in my binging era with inconsistent workouts (even though I HATEEE workouts).

⚡️I love cats but cats don’t love me I guess. Whenever I look in the eyes of cats, they get scared of me and run away without hesitation. But they love to receive cuddles from me and they let me pet them though.🥺

This is the end of this post and thank you for reading to the end. Have a great day fellows!

Part-2 will be about planets in 7th house to 12th house!!✨

[breesays]

My son, my sun

Where did my little boo learn to talk to plants? We take plant babies from Gramma Lita's massive yard, recently started propagating them in water. Nothing for the first couple of weeks. Then Des said, "Mama, let me hold them" - and he took the bulb in his hand, looked lovingly at that little would-be-could-be plant and spoke to it in a way that astonished me. "You are so beautiful" he said. "You are doing such a good job. I am so happy to see you." I died, they thrived.

Four nights ago we unwrapped a fragrant bath bomb and I said, "Mmm, rose" and he started serenading me, from the "wonderful roses" part of "Til There Was You" and who can even do that? I feel like if I want to sing something, even casually, I have to start from the top. He vocalizes the percussion part of songs. Chh chh chh. Probably not revolutionary, but something new for my brain.

Some of the moms who got a spot in TK are reporting back that one of their kids "goals" for the year is to count to 20. Oh. Des can count to 100, and in Spanish. The other day he taught me how to say "knees" in Spanish, which is when I found out he can sing "Head Shoulders Knees and Toes" in a second language. He remembers numbers really well, and has a good grasp of time. He can math way more at 4 years old than I could at like, 7 years old - and that's just because it's interesting to him, measurements and doubling things and how old was his friend Felix when he turned 2? Sometimes I just have to say, "That is a calculation I can't do on the fly, buddy."

He's growing his hair out long so he can make it curly, like his friend Vienna and his cousin Emerson. I wish he liked to read books together more, but maybe that will come later. It's OK if that's an interest we don't share. We make up new words until we're too tired, me channeling the IKEA catalog. Sometimes he says, "I have an idea - let's count to the highest number we know" to which I reply, "That does not sound like fun to mama, can we play a word game instead?" He also loves blowing up and popping balloons. Actually, he loves doing a lot of things with balloons - keepy uppy, birdy-flying, inflating then deflating, using them as stamps, talking about them on his imaginary YouTube channel...

He likes to eat seaweed snacks and will basically try any food at least once. He loves tomatoes, so much so that he will eat them like an apple. He steals my sushi and told me the pumpkin seeds needed "more paprika."

He makes funny observations. I took him to my work party recently and I told him Erica was in charge. When we looked back at photos from that night he asked, "Does Erica ever go home?" I said "Yes, of course, she has two kiddos of her own - why do you think that she doesn't?" He said, "Well, she's in charge."

My therapist is retiring at the end of the year, and then I won't have anyone to tell me what's healthy or adjusted anymore. I told her that sometimes Desmond says, "You know, Mama, I love Dada more than you." I respond: "That's OK, my love for you doesn't change." It doesn't hurt me, it makes me curious - what is he trying to accomplish? That non-judgemental curiosity they tried to summon from the depth of my cold being during the "can we save this marriage?" time - there it is! Therapist said: It's remarkable that he even vocalized this. It's called secure attachment.

For awhile I also wondered - does Des need therapy during this transition? He has asked why we don't live together anymore and I said, "not all families live together" - but all the families he knew of, did. So we got a couple books. Representation. Therapist said: Unless he is acting out, or it's disrupting, he is ok. Again, the fact that he's even asking these questions is GREAT. I do a value a good question-asker.

I'm still writing my book of essays and I've recently hit 38K words. I've considered publishing under a pseudonym, because I don't want to FIGHT about asexuality. I just want some previously unlearned people to know that it EXISTS. I publish most of my revelations and feelings about being Ace on my Medium. The blog that upset him was titled "Ace Week 2023" - and posted on Medium. I didn't have the time or mental capacity to react at the time. I just chose not to. Spiral, if you must - I will not add any fuel. But I did feel mad, when I unboxed that compartmentalization --

Sometimes I want to be kind and gentle and empathic because, wow we didn’t know anything, did we? There wasn’t the vocabulary for what I was experiencing. There were no alternate storylines to draw inspiration from. But sometimes I am furious, violated, underestimated. 

If you just light the path, everyone will find their own way there, right? I’m the deer in headlights, then I run towards the inevitable crash. Scampering off into the unlit wild was somehow more intimidating. So, blind yourself. Numb yourself. Anything to get to the other side.

[kingedmundsroyalmurder]

Blue Castle chapter 24 and 25

Cissy is the daughter the Stirlings wish Valancy had been. Pretty, sweet, meek, innocent in the ways of the world, eager to please and quick to forgive. Someone who would do as she was told and look pretty in church without outshining Olive. And, of course, Cecilia Stirling would have had no need to go out to work, and thus never would have met her child's father.

I'm struck in particular by the juxtaposition of these two passages:

From chapter 24: " And I—didn’t know—some things. I didn’t—understand. Then his father came and took him away. And—after a little—I found out—"

Back in chapter 11: " Poor Mrs. Frederick was almost in a state of collapse. She had believed—or pretended to believe—that Valancy still supposed that children were found in parsley beds."

Cissy was raised by a single father who knows perfectly well how sex works, to the point where it likely doesn't even occur to him that people aren't just born knowing where babies come from. Her other main influence was her church community, made up of people who, one assumes, do not talk about these things publicly, and certainly not to Cissy Gay. It's implied that Cissy's mother, had she lived, would have (or at least should have) taught her these things. Clearly she never learned on her own, until it was too late.

Valancy, meanwhile, knows perfectly well where babies come from, to the point where she's embarrassed to even think about wanting them. Wanting to be a mother is perfectly respectable, even laudable for a woman in Valancy's position. Wanting the process of becoming a mother is most certainly not. It's not said where Valancy learned about sex and how it works, although my vote is from Olive, who has had boyfriends and been engaged.

So meek, innocent Cissy Gay might well have been better tolerated by the Stirlings than odd, never quite fitting in properly Valancy. (Cissy would, most likely, have been utterly crushed by the Stirlings in a way that Valancy never quite was. But then again, Olive wasn't. Maybe a Cecilia Stirling who was pretty and clearly had some marital prospects because of her looks would have been treated better by the extended family, if not Mrs. Fredrick and Cousin Stickles.) And, in contrast, Valancy might well have thrived as Abel Gay's daughter. Without discounting the impact of Abel's neglect, Valancy is clearly more outspoken than Cissy, and stronger willed. She grew up in a stifling and domineering society and the second she got out she not only knew her own mind but had no fear speaking it. If she'd been left to raise herself, I think it wouldn't have taken the promise of imminent death to set that part of her free.

I have AUs in my head now. Moving on...

Other thoughts about these chapters --

I did a little bit of research into the Canadian turn of the century education system back when we learned about Olive's engagements. She graduated from college at 18, and from what I could tell, it seems like College was for students roughly 15-18ish. So if that's correct and college is the word LMM uses to mean high school age students, with University being for 18+, then Cissy's young college student would have been a teenager. Probably 18 or 19 at oldest, possibly (likely?) younger.

And Cissy went to work at the hotel "4 years previously". At 25 or 26 at time of death (since she's three years younger than Valancy, who just turned 29), she would have been ~21 at time of boyfriend. So probably older than the boy.

Given that, it's likely that the boy was probably just as surprised and horrified by the pregnancy as Cissy was. I can't even be mad at him -- he screwed up and tried to make it right by offering to marry her and Cissy turned him down. Just a bad situation all around.

Even just reading about Cissy's funeral makes me furious. No wonder Valancy hated it ad Barney refused to go.

"her slanted eyes smudged with purple" -> Another purple mention. Is LMM subtly foreshadowing that Valancy has no intention of going back to her mother's house?

[thisissite]

I was a shy girl who was afraid when anyone even raised their voice to her. I immediately became hysterical. Someone always lived with us; my parents rented out a room so that we could have money. I also clearly remember going with my mother to her temporary job. She then worked as a nanny and cook in a rich house and took care of other people’s children, and my brother, who was 4 years older and at 7-9 years old could only feed me a burnt egg. Therefore, the days when she took me with her were amazing, because they fed me (with leftover food), I could watch cartoons, although in a foreign language to me.

When I was 5 years old, another brother was born, and there were three of us in the family. I dreamed of a brother because I knew that he would protect me and I was happy about that. By the way, it’s funny that they told me about his birth when I was watching the series on TV and I didn’t care at all, the main thing was not to miss the episode. Back then I was already addicted to TV series. My joy over his birth faded a couple of days after he was brought home. He didn't really scream, at least I don't remember that. Didn't interfere with sleep. He took all the love from our parents. They didn't care about me. Then I stopped eating and started raising my body temperature, pretending to be sick. As soon as my parents paid attention to me and hugged me, my temperature immediately dropped and I felt better. But I didn't eat. I'd fall asleep at the table if I couldn't separate my food into fibers. And then dad came up with a game so that I would at least drink milk, we would run to the refrigerator in the evening, take a carton of milk and drink it in a race. Summer came, I spent it with my grandparents. They lived in a private house, sharing it with their son's family and a tenant. Almost immediately, my cousin and I got bored and started pestering the tenant. He had an office in his garage and we would go in there to see what he was doing there. He had a production of pirated discs. Our curiosity led us to the fact that he taught us how to create such disks and we got a job with him. He paid us about $0.50 a day, but we were happy that we made the game discs ourselves! At the beginning of the day, my cousin was given a list of how many and what kind of discs needed to be made. We turned on the radio and started creating. Who knew this was illegal? One summer day my parents and brothers came to visit us. That day, my brother #1, me and four of my cousins started going crazy all over the neighborhood. Our adventures took us to a construction site, which we climbed onto. The guys were all 2-7 years older than me and treated me not like a fragile sister, but rather like a burden. We ran on the walls of the first floor (owner only managed to bild half the floor) and reached the place where, obviously, the front door should have been, because the abyss was deep and far away. All the guys calmly jumped up and started shouting to me: “S, we won’t wait for you! Stay here! And we will run home, tell your parents that you are jumping around the construction site, and they will scold you!". I cried because I understood that I didn’t have enough strength to fly to the other end, but I couldn’t go down either, there were some construction rods below, and it was high, but the guys really abandoned me. I stepped back and, trying to speed up, jumped up, imagining myself as the Spirit from the cartoon (Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron). Unfortunately, I didn’t succeed as well as he did, and, hitting my chest hard, I caught on the bricks on the other side. I pulled herself up, stood up and, in tears, tried to catch up with the guys. In August they took me home. At that time, I had been dreaming about a skateboard for more than a year and told my parents how much I wanted it and how glad I would be if they bought it for me. They didn’t buy it for me, we didn't have money, my dad made it himself, but it didn’t look like a skateboard. If you're interested, I can make it look like in 3dsmax, but for now I'll describe it. A piece of wood (maybe oak), 2 long pieces of wood were screwed to it, on which there were wheels. My dad gave me this dadboard and I was glad he let me try it out on the street. I hugged him, ran outside, laid him on the ground, sat on dadboard and drove off.

We lived on a hill, so I drove down the sidewalk. But as soon as I realized that I was approaching a busy intersection with traffic lights, I realized that it was time to brake. I’ve already picked up speed, there are no brakes on the dadboard, I can’t lean back like on a skateboard, because the wheels are screwed too close to the end of the board. I couldn’t think of anything better than to brake first with my toes, fortunately I was wearing sneakers, but quickly enough I wore them down to my toes, at which point I connected my palms, knees and elbows. I managed to slow down, I walked home along the hill and still walked up to the 4th floor. Where brother #1 and dad met me. They examined me, sat me on a chair and began to treat my wounds with everything that was at home, even what was not allowed to go into the wounds. I screamed furiously in pain as long as I had the strength, and they tried to shut up and told me to be quiet, because my mother and brother #2 were visiting the neighbors and they didn’t want her to hear. Need I say that it was a miracle that I didn’t get hit by a car then?

[cleocatrablossy]

I’m sorry, but it’s oddly terrifying how concerned my brother is with death and more so heaven. My dad is barely even religious and my stepmom is but in a witch way and doesn’t talk to my brother about it, and I’m an atheist and will not talk about religion with him. He’s four and keeps talking about how he doesn’t want to go to heaven and is worried about it. I think it’s because he goes to a “pre-school”(i add quotes because I dunno if preschools are typically government owned like elementary through high or not, but this one is definitely not.) that’s religious(more specifically, Christian). They did a reenactment of Jesus riding a donkey a week or so ago so they definitely learn some things about Christianity. And he has no other way of knowing about what heaven is. But really the thing that weirded me out was last night when we went to a restaurant and some kid gave him a toy car, saying he could keep it forever. To make sure he wasn’t just stealing some kid’s toy my stepmom told him to go make sure. And then he comes back and says he can keep it forever and ever until he goes to heaven. A few times of going off and coming back later he says the kid gave it to him because he wants to go to heaven. And??? Like maybe it’s just that I’m from California and they’re in Texas so it’s sorta a culture shock thing but it is so weird to hear a 4 year old talking about being scared of/not wanting to go to heaven and that another like 4-5 year old giving a toy away saying they did so because they want to go to heaven. Like they’re not even in elementary school yet?? And it’s not even like I’m in a family where we’re completely separated from religion either, my brother and I were both baptized, my cousins go to church for holidays, my mom and grandparents do lent, we celebrate the Christian holidays, my mom has religious things around the house, I went to church at least once since I asked who ‘the man on the T’ was(it was a crucifix with Jesus on it), we have a holy text collection, and I was raised with Greek Mythos. But it’s just still so fucking weird. Like I know my brother doesn’t actually have context on Christianity or what heaven is or anything like that unless he was taught it at his preschool, but he’s still so concerned about it??

[redrobin-detective]

love language

“Ben,” the voice said softly, “wake up.” It was familiar in a way Ben couldn’t put his finger on. 

“No, mom,” Ben groaned, “five more minutes.”

“Not Mother,” the voice said with an amused huff. “Been longer than five minutes, worried now,” it continued on awkwardly. Ben frowned, confused by the situation. He opened his eyes and sat up to assess what was going on. At least that was what he tried to do.

“Woah,” he gasped as he found he couldn’t move much at all. He didn’t really have sensation or form, there was nothing around him to see and no eyes he could use to see anything with. Ben felt like his brain was spread thin, like cream cheese on a bagel, making every thought feel strange and disconnected. “Where am I?”

“Safe,” the voice soothed and Ben couldn’t help but believe. “Always safe with me. We’re away from attack now, recover here for Grandpa Max or Cousin Gwen to find us.”

“Us?” Ben fumbled as he added up the words in his head. “Wait, you’re the Omnitrix, aren’t you?”

“Yes,” the voice - which now that he was listening Ben recognized as his own just a slightly different pitch and intonation - said happily. “And you are Master, Ben Tennyson.” 

“So wait, am I inside the watch?” Ben asked. That would explain his lack of a body, his whole brain was just floating around inside the alien device. It was weird and a bit scary, no wonder Ghostfreak didn’t like it. “Are you in my body?”

“Sorry,” the Omnitrix said almost apologetically, “was necessary. You were unconscious, your life threatened. Had to access your nervous system to get you to safety. Switch back now?”

“No wait, not yet, I wanna talk some more,” Ben pleaded. “Could you always do this? I feel Azmuth would have shadowbanned me ages ago if he knew he could.”

“This was an emergency, we will always do what is necessary to save the Master’s life.” the Omnitrix responded, it’s words coming more naturally now that it was getting used to it. Ben could practically feel the device flicking through his knowledge language and vocabulary to better communicate. It should feel invasive and yet somehow wasn’t. “And Creator does not get an opinion on the Master.”

“Harsh,” Ben responded back, “what do you got against Azmuth? He did make you, helps fix you when I mess up even though he doesn’t have to.”

“Creator tried to separate us,” the Omnitrix bit back harshly. “He lied to Master, drugged you and attempted to remove me from your person. It did not ask either of us, simply decided a child could not handle the responsibility.”

“Woah,” Ben had gone to Galvan Prime many times, fallen asleep quite often. How many times had Azmuth tried to take the device from him?

“Only once,” the Omnitrix chimed in as if reading his thoughts which, oh, it probably was. Weird. “We shocked him to unconsciousness, to prevent him from trying again. We will not be separated.” 

“Protective, aren’t you?” Ben chuckled awkwardly. It was one thing to know Azmuth wanted to remove the watch, it was another to realize the watch wouldn’t let that happen.

“You are the Master,” it said fondly, “We love you, more than anything in the omniverse. We would watch it all burn if it meant keeping you safe.”

“What?” Ben asked flustered. His parents said they loved him constantly, same with Grandpa and Gwen. But this felt different. “Why? Like seriously, why me? I’m 16 years old and I’m just as much a mess as I was at 10.”

“We...” it paused as if thinking. There was a vague feeling of moving and Ben wondered what the watch was doing in his body. “We can’t explain, Master was just right.” 

“Many wanted to claim us,” the Omnitrix continued. “For many Earth years, we were pulled across the universe, searching for the perfect host. Creator grew tired of the debates, the lies, the deaths that followed and eventually abandoned us. It told us to choose wisely who could use our power. Kings and warriors and scientists demanded it and still we did not relent. None were worthy until you.”

“Seriously?” Ben questioned, “I was like a C student with unmanaged ADHD and about 4 complexes stuffed in a trench coat. Plus we met on accident, Xylene was trying to send you to Grandpa.”

“We like Grandpa Max,” the watch hummed, “but he is too much of solider. Sometimes he even forgets your his family. When the pod opened and we scanned you, we only found your curiosity and wonder. You were the first being to look upon us without ulterior motives. It was, nice.”

“I get that,” Ben mumbled to himself, more than used to everyone in his life expecting something or other from him. 

“We, too, were curious about you. Creator did not add human DNA in our storage. He only cared for relevant species at the time, Earth and it’s people were as alien to us as we were to you.”

“Is that why you latched on?” Ben asked again. 

“Partially, we knew were under attack and needed some manner of escape. It wasn’t going to be forever but we found we liked you; your bravery, your creativity, your love... it inspired us. You went from Host to Master and we bonded more permanently.”

“Huh,” Ben said thoughtfully. “I never really realized you were alive, that you chose me.” He chuckled sadly, “I turned out to be kind of a disappointment, huh?” 

“No,” the watch responded forcefully, enough to startle Ben out of his dark thoughts. “We love you, all of you. All your successes and failures, flaws and strengths, we love them all. We are one in the same, bonded in entirety. We will spend the rest of your days together and when your natural death comes, we will die too. There will be no Master after Ben.”

“So even when I’m just messing around...” Ben asked, changing topics from that heavy comment.

“You taught us how to play and we learned,” The Omnitrix teased. “You ask for Humongosaur too much though, we can have our own fun.”

“Oh so you’re the reason I always get the wrong alien,” Ben laughed. “You’re gonna get me killed one day!”

“Never,” the Omnitrix said warmly but with a steely protectiveness in there. “We will always protect you.”

“Hmm, I guess so,” Ben hummed. “What’s going out in the real world?”

“The battle is over as far as we can see. No sign of Cousin Gwen, Friend Kevin or Partner Rook. Grandpa Max was still in the satellite orbiting the planet last we heard. Do you wish to return now that the danger has passed?”

“Nah, not yet,” Ben sighed, enjoying a few minutes without someone needing him. “I know my body is in safe hands. Tell me more about some of the bozos who tried to wear you.”

“Aurius the Magnificent was one of the more annoying,” the Omnitrix said in the tone Ben used when he was feeling petty. “Just put me on and demanded that I chose him. He did it in front of his whole court and was so frustrated when I would not attach. His concubines laughed at him.”

“Oh man, how embarrassing,” Ben cackled. He let go of his worries, of his responsibilities, of everything and just basked in the familiar tones and the omnipresent love around him. 

[variousqueerthings]

okay okay some trans guy daniel vibes

1. pre-California

1. he was one of those kids who talked very adamantly about being a boy early on in his life, so both of his parents knew, with the limitations of the 70s in terms of language and context

2. even with the limitations of the 70s it's not like there was nothing, although I don't think they knew much in terms of like... finding a wider community of people. there was just enough of an idea that there was precedence and they could be supportive of him with the doctor to track down what kind of medical stuff might be necessary in future - I think the larussos to a one have always been stubborn about things!

+ I'm headcanoning them as one of those far-reaching families where they're like "oh yeah, just like great great uncle louis who came over in a suit and tie at the turn of the century to settle in America, we always knew about him, this isn't any different" and so they just roll with it and nobody even really remembers after a couple of years

3. besides, most of his hand-me-downs were from male cousins, so he never even wore dresses in more than 2 or 3 family photos before lucille and his dad said they only needed boys' clothes from now on

4. his dad wasn't a conventional kinda guy either -- he was daniel's original model for how to be a man, and he was kind and a bit sensitive and never yelled. that being said he taught him how to punch him on the chin too (took this from a story billy told about his dad teaching him to punch)

5. he'd obviously accompany his cousins when they were fighting rival punks -- always had someone watching his back, because families do that, and it was one of those tacit acceptances of him occupying a masculine role, although, like his father, he wasn't the kind to seek out fights

6. obviously we know, he was also terrible at ever backing down, but that's partly because he's known that you can be judged for not being "man enough" at the drop of a hat. he's not insecure in his masculinity, but he also knows he has to defend what he's got a lot harder than the others

7. because there's a bit of an outsider's eye looking in, he's also always been able see some of the ridiculousness in masculine posturing -- it's not that conscious, but he's never felt the urge to perform. he's got the knowledge of being a boy. he doesn't need to "play-act"

8. but the thing is... right around the time he was feeling like everything was fine, like he was just a boy like any other boy... that's right around the time his dad got sick.

and in a lot of ways he can't draw a distinct line between his dad dying and growing into boyhood (he told daniel that he was gonna be the man of the house now, but it meant something different between them than the age-old outdated adage. it meant his dad was making sure to tell him that he was seeing him, but it was just as much a goodbye. being seen and saying goodbye meant the same thing now)

and after his dad died he wasn't just like any other boy anymore

9. they never had a lot of money - on some level he sort of thinks he knew, but his parents always made an effort to hide that from him, and besides, a community like theirs looked out for each other

but after his dad died it was like all the little things that you usually didn't notice became much more noticeable, including himself. people didn't avoid them really -- they were just... careful. kinda weird. adults would look at him funny and pat him on the cheek a lot and there would be long adult talks with his mom that always stilled when he entered a room -- in a lot of ways the things that hadn't been problems when he'd become a boy were problems now

10. puberty came and fucked everything up, just like it tends to do to people. but just like when his dad died, it was something that made him feel different... it was around this time his mom had some serious talks with him about how his body was changing and how he had to be more careful. some people might get the wrong idea

but he's a smart boy. she knows he can take care of himself. and when he's a bit older, she's got some numbers for doctors who can help out if that's what he wants, because hey, it's the 80s now -- brand new exciting times, don't worry kiddo, we've got this

obviously he's known things were different for him (he doesn't use the same changing rooms as other boys, even if he's on the boys' soccer team. he's still flat as a board though, so he runs around without a shirt in the summer)

11. all the other boys are talking about girls at this point and he's sort of joining in. he likes girls sure, they're real pretty. but he likes boys too and he can't really tell the difference, and he thinks the difference is what kinda stuff you say about girls and boys. crude things he kinda doesn't really wanna say... and is this something that's wrong about him as a boy? he figures he doesn't really care. if he gets to choose what kinda guy he is, then he's gonna be the kinda guy that doesn't say mean things about girls (the thing about the boys... he's not sure about that)

12. judy thinks he's a real nice guy. not like the other ones... softer, you know? like she can really talk to him (they kiss once, like teenagers who've never kissed someone before -- daniel is pretty sure he got it right? he's enthusiastic anyway)

13. and then, suddenly, not long after that, except it's not so sudden, because he's kinda known they've been struggling... he's heard more of the hushed conversations between his mom and relatives (them telling her that they'll sort it out and her telling them that she can't stop seeing him everywhere and besides she's got opportunities, not like up here, no she doesn't need them to get the heating bill) and it's been real cold in the winter these last two years, and she's been saying things like how a warmer climate might be good for them and then...

he's promising everyone he'll be back soon, because he will

there's nothing waiting for a boy like him in California...

[wonhoarctic]

mother's day | lee minhyuk

request: hii i love your writing 🥺 could i request a drabble fic with minhyuk? just a bit of some warm fuzzy fluff tgt with creampie / breeding smut with bf min if thats ok?

genre: fluff, but with some smut at the end

word count: 1569

pairing: minhyuk x fem!reader

a/n: hi bub!! you didn't specified the gender of reader, but as you said about breeding, i assume it's fem!reader, but i hope this is what you wanted!! it's not exactly a drabble fic bc it's a bit longer, but it still have all the things you've requested, hope you like it! please, take care, and you can always request something here! <3

contains: a fluffy mother's day in which you and your newly-married husband go to visit his mother in a family dinner and spend the day playing with his nephews and godsons, which leads both of you to want some babies, smut contains fingering, oral (m. receiving), nipple play, missionary position, creampie, and filthy language, basically, a breeding smut

mother's day, so it means that we were going to see my mom at lunch, and we would dinner in his mom's house, which is a place i've ever loved going to, his parents are the sweetest couple alive, they've ever treated me as their own daughter, and i love to spend some time with my mother-in-law, who've taught me to cook his favorite plates, always showed me his baby pics, told me stories about min and her stories about being in love with his dad, and she always supported me on whatever i did

we came back from my parent's house, and after my shower, my husband, minhyuk, went to take his, while i put a dress, fixed my hair and put some makeup on, nervous and wanting to cause a good impression, because there would be some of his relatives i haven't seen for a while

"you look gorgeous, baby" i felt hands on my waist, and a little peck on my cheek, which made me blush, and he laughed slightly, smiling to me "are you nervous?" i nodded "don't worry, love, they probably love you more than me, y/n" he laughed more

minhyuk was fast to dress up, and i wore my heels, so we could finally leave home, after he got the gifts for his mom

when we arrived, i felt myself tense a little, seeing his family after a while — after we went on a 3 months honeymoon — was a little strange, we missed the first months of our little niece, and we couldn't be on the eldest twins birthday party, and yet, here we were, smiling brightly after coming back to korea, and seeing them

"happy mother's day, mom!" he exclaimed, smiling to her, going to get her gifts on the bag "our trip to italy was amazing, i have a lot to tell you, but first, i have to give you all the gifts i bought there with y/n, she was the one who helped choosing them"

after he spent some time with his parents and brother, he came back to me, who was speaking with his brother's wife all the time, finally being able to see our little niece, younghwa, who was turning 5 months old now

"she's grown up a lot... i remember when you were pregnant" i felt hands on my waist, hugging me from behind, a soft and warm voice while speaking with his sister-in-law, who was holding the baby

"minjoon is younger than you, and we already have twins who are 4 years old and a newborn daughter... i wonder when you two are going to have a baby too..." she spoke, laughing a bit

"it might seem a little early to want babies, but y/n and me are currently trying to have babies, right, love?" he turned out to me, who nodded shyly "we had very nice tries of having babies during our honeymoon..." blushing, i slapped his shoulder lightly, escaping from his embrace

"that's not the type of thing we use to say when we're in public, minhyuk!" i screamed in a whisper, still blushed, and he laughed, apologizing

"but it's funny to see you blushing, love~" he grabbed my hand "come here, let's play with the kids"

we came to the playing spot our nephews and godsons did, quickly getting into the 4-5 years old games

"uncle min, when are we having a cousin to play with us?!" our niece asked with sparkling eyes, her brother quickly nodding, asking him for a baby, and i laughed — is it a signal for us to finally have our much-dreamed-off baby?

"as soon as possible, bubs" he smiled to the kids, who returned him the cutest smiles ever

we spent the whole day playing with the kids, and telling his parents about our honeymoon trip, but when we were coming back home, he pressed me against the car

"y/n, today everyone talked a lot about we having a baby, right?" he got closer to me, his lips pressing against my ear "don't you think this is a signal, hm?"

"i think so..." i laughed, wanting to see how far he'd go

"why don't we take this to the bedroom, then?" he started to leave some open mouthed kisses in my neck, not caring if they were going to bruise or not, i tried my best not to moan, trying to focus in other things, but when he kissed and licked at my weak spot, i couldn't help but moan, feeling myself getting wetter by any second

"let's go home, baby, someone might see us here" i spoke, and he stepped back, letting me get in the car, because i was the one who would drive home

when we got in, we removed our shoes, and he lifted me from the ground while we were in an intense make out session, easily carrying me to the bedroom, gently placing me on the bed, sliding the zipper of my dress

"so, you're wearing the lingerie set i bought for you in dolce & gabbana... you're even sexier than usual, love" minhyuk pointed, his hands lowering one of the straps of the black silk balconette, leaving wet marks all over my collarbone, making my breathe heavier than before

"s-stop teasing me... please" i begged, and he looked at me, smirking, easily getting rid of my bra

"you want me?" i nodded, and his smirk grew "where?", before i could say something, his lips got attached to one of my nipples, sucking and licking gently on the hard bud, which was becoming more and more sensitive, and me, wetter by any second

tired of waiting, one of my hands went to remove my satin laced briefs, but he stopped my hand, pulling it away just to use his own hand

he didn't had to rub my clit or whatever, i was already so wet, that he just started to finger fuck me, and he didn't had any mercy, fingering me in an incredible speed, making me moan out loud, my hips jerking wildly to more contact, desperate to cum, and it had passed only 5 minutes since he started to finger fuck me

"you're already that desperate to cum, y/n?" he chuckled, low and dark "i have that much effect on you?" his thrusts were painfully slow now

"p-please, min, let me cum, i'll do whatever you want me to do" i moaned, and before i knew, his thrusts became faster again, and i was finally cumming "you said you'd do anything i wanted if i let you cum, right?" he sat against the headboard, looking at me lustfully "come here and suck me off like the good slut you are" he ordered

as if he asked me to do, i took him in my mouth, sucking and licking him like i could, using my hands whenever i had problems of fitting him entirely in my mouth

minhyuk was a moaning mess, he jerked his hips against my face countless times, but then, he removed me from his dick, gently laying me down on the bed, he was being rough, but yet soft, and i couldn't deny — i was loving it

before giving me any previous advices, he entered me, making me yelp in surprise, just a bit sensitive as the waves from the last orgasm were still there, thrusting in a medium pace so i could get used to the stretch, and once i did, i moved my hip slowly, moaning loudly and asking him for more silently

and he seemed to get my message, starting to slam his hips against mine faster, but being incredibly gentle, not applying much force, and he kissed me so he could swallow my moans, none of us wanting to get expelled from our apartment, because we're both a loud couple

"you're going to take my cum very well, right? you'll need it a lot to grow our child, darling", he started to get sloppier in his thrusts, his breath heavier, and i knew minhyuk was close, especially when his long fingers went down to abuse my swollen and aching clit, increasing the flames in my stomach

"m-min" i moaned "i'm s-so close", and his fingers gained as much speed as his thrusts

"come for me, princess, come all over my cock" he said, and not much longer, as he continued his ministrations on my body, i reached my second high, cumming on his cock

and the new tightness seemed to have effect on him, as he thrusted a few more times before cumming, his hot seed coating my walls, and he pulled out of my slit, pressing a chaste kiss on my lips

"i love you" he said, before pulling me closer to his chest "let's just stay like this, please, i don't want to let you go"

"okay, but can you just help me to clean this mess? i'm sure you don't want me to stain the sheets with your cum, right?" i laughed, and he mimicked me "and min, i'd never let you go, after we clean up this mess, we can even sleep naked, that i'll make sure to be in your arms all night" i smiled, and he pulled me closer, kissing me again, grabbing some tissues to clean us

"i love you too, hyuk, and i hope we can have a baby soon"

[simonsrosebud]

the one where someone doesn’t know who kevin day is, pt. 4

part one two three five

extra content linked at the bottom!!

the cousins are all on the bus.  they’re the first ones there, but kevin hangs behind to wait for dalton.  apparently it’s obvious.

nicky hangs out the open bus door.  “he meet wymack yet?”  and goes bug eyed when kevin shakes his head.  “you haven’t introduced your boyfriend to your dad yet?!  this is the first time they’re meeting?!”

and jesus, he didn’t think it was a big deal.  it’s just the banquet.  but he also knows he’s never had a father before.  or a boyfriend, really.

“is... should i have done that before?  why- it’s not some big deal.”

nicky shrugs.  “first impressions are important.”  and goes in the bus.

and now kevin’s trying not to get overwhelmed.

abby’s in charge of the headcount, but wymack still climbs out of the bus when the dates get there.  dalton is the first one. 

he goes right to kevin- still waiting outside the bus, and gives him a quick kiss before grabbing his hand and continuing on his way to wymack.

he sticks his hand right out.  “i’m dalton.  it’s nice to meet you, mr. wymack.”

wymack nods.  “you as well.  heard good things.”  kevin hasn’t really said things about dalton, but he lets it go.  probably just being polite.

“hell, hope i can live up to them.”  he laughs.  “i would’ve made it a point to introduce myself before, i apologize.  i feel like i’ve been grading finals for weeks, now.”

wymack gets talking, and kevin honestly feels like a third wheel.  dalton was doing a better job at talking with his father than he did sometimes.

kevin sends dalton onto the bus eventually, and wymack holds him back.  “you told him shit?”

“yes.  not the yakuza.”

“but he knows you’re kinda fucked in the head?”  kevin almost frowns.  he’s not wrong.  wymack adds as a second thought, “not to say the rest of those idiots aren’t.”

“he knows.”  he normally wouldn’t care to mention it, but he really wants wymack to like dalton.  “he helped me with a panic attack a little bit ago.”

“riko?”  he nods.  every time it happens it makes wymack look beaten down.  kevin almost regrets telling him, but wymack purses his lips and after a moment shoves his shoulder towards the bus.  “he’s a good kid. stop your worrying and get your ass on the bus.”

it’s as good as a compliment as he’d hoped for, honestly.

this years banquet is in virginia.  it’s a six hour drive, and kevin had already explained why they don’t fly if they don’t have to, so dalton’s kind of made it his mission to get along with some of the foxes.

kevin would rather he not.  it’s not like the last time dalton spent time with the foxes they spilled his life faults in front of his new boyfriend.

that would be insane.

matt, dan, and dalton talk the most on the ride.  renee joins the conversation at some point and matt and dan butt out.

kevin’s busy talking to wymack about exy, and horror sets in his eyes when he sees neil talking to his boyfriend.  “we’re three hours in, kevin, he’s made it this far.”  as in, neil won’t break him.  but kevin’s nervous anyway.

until he hears what they’re talking about.

math.

“that’s disgusting.”  kevin leans back in his seat and watches them talk.

renee smiles.  “you’re dating him.”

the foxes are sat on the opposite side of the court of the ravens, as has become routine ever since neil and riko’s encounter.  instead they’re sat with the trojans and jeremy, jean, and alvarez sit across from them.  kevin smiles when jeremy comes around to say hi, but he smiles just a bit wider when introducing dalton.

jean and kevin have this thing.  they don’t talk often, but when they do it’s more of a check up.  so when jean asks him in french how he is, dalton grins.  “do all exy players just speak french?”  it’s more of a remark to jeremy, who laughs and tells him jean said he taught kevin french when they both lived at edgar allen together, which makes dalton feel a little bad.  kevin had told him how he knew jean, and about living at edgar allen with riko’s abuse.

later, dalton grabs his hand under the table.  “is french triggering for you?”  and, what?  “jeremy said jean taught you french, and you’ve told me about your time with jean.” oh.

dalton was a graduate student, sure, but he was more intuitive than kevin thought.  “french was an escape because no one but us understood it.  i like speaking french to you, because you like it.  it helps to take away the meaning behind why i learned it in the first place, i think.”

“okay... can i kiss you?  would you be okay with that?”

kevin raises a brow.  “i mean, jesus, i came out for a reason.”  he starts to turn away with fake annoyance, but dalton snorts and turns his chin back before he gets away.  it’s just a small peck, but it’s enough to make dalton smile so kevin doesn’t care.

jeremy circles back.  “volleyball, guys?”

dalton snaps his head back to kevin.  “oh, i’m going to dominate you.”  and takes off.

“be on my team!”

“nope!”

normally they’d drive back that night.  the first banquet after the disastrous one last year was the fall one (which kevin went to with renee because he was still scared to introduce dalton), and they’d gone back that night since it was only a two hour drive.

wymack wasn’t sold on it at first, but after getting multiple confirmations from everyone that it’d be okay, he booked rooms so they could drive back sunday morning instead.

the foxes are all drunk- save for renee, andrew, neil, kevin and dalton.

they gather in matt and dan’s room for hours.  at one point, kevin’s so out of it and tired that he doesn’t notice dalton leave for a moment.

it’s because of andrew.

but all must go well because dalton makes it back alive and unfazed.  he settles behind kevin and kisses his cheek.  “wanna head back?”  he drops his head into the crook of his neck.  “you look really good, baby.”

that’s a new nickname.  he thinks he likes it.

ahaha.  aha.  you know what happens.

dalton asks kevin if he would want to come to maryland, his home, for a few days during winter break.  kevin says sure before he realizes that it probably includes him meeting dalton’s family.

kevin does a google search once he’s settled back in his bed at palmetto.

when do people normally say i love you in a relationship?

he deletes it almost as soon as he searches it.  it’s a stupid thing to search.

dalton sends him a text.  a funny twitter post, and a message under it.

the banquet was so much fun, i’m so glad you asked me to go w you❤️❤️

kevin sends a heart back.

ALL EXTRA CONTENT ALL HERE BABEY (aka a dalton/kevin directory so i don’t have to keep updating on this post hehe)

there’s so much extra content and it just keeps coming so keep an eye out for updates on that link^^

dalton finds out how famous kevin really is

dalton/kevin at pride

what does dalton look like?

first fight aha

what did andrew say to dalton?

dalton & wymack’s perspective of meeting each other

AMAZING DALTON X KEVIN ART!!!

kevin meeting dalton’s friends

[moral-turpitudes]

Silver Linings: Part 1

Masterlist | Rules | Peaky Prompts

A/N: Excuse any of my terrible math skills and if this seems rushed. This is the best I could come up with lol, I hope you all like it though!

Trigger Warnings: Swearing, Angst, Slight Fighting, Descriptions of Drug Use, Drinking, Familial Drama, Fluff, Mentions of Adoption, etc.

Word Count: 3,972

Characters: Alfie Solomons x Adopted Daughter!Reader + Michael Gray x Alfie’s Adopted Daughter!Reader

Summary: After growing tired of hiding, Y/N decides to venture out from the back of her fathers shop, not knowing she’d quite literally fall for one of her father’s enemies who happened to be lurking around the corner. But with tensions growing between the two families, one decision could change the course of their lives as they know it, for better and for worse.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | *Part 4* | Part 5

“Alright Y/N, now when you aim you gotta line yer eyes up with the sight. Take a deep breath, and on that exhale of yours yer gonna pull that little trigger right there.” Alfie said, the teenage girl only coming up to around his chest, her hands shaking slightly as she aimed the small hand gun for one of the flour sacks in the back of the shop. With a small exhale she fired, the bullet whirling through the air and into the target she’d helped draw on it the day before.

“See that’s not so hard innit?” He asked, smiling at the new light in his life.

Y/N heard her father calling for her upstairs, bringing her out of her daydreams from years ago. That was during the first week she’d lived with him after he adopted her from the nearby orphanage. She had no adoptive mother, and no other friends except their dog Cyril, seeing as she had to be practically hidden away on a daily basis. The only time she really went out was to work in her fathers shop, where she’d do her best to avoid being spotted by her fathers business partners-some of which who had strained relationships with him and his men.

Shaking the memory from her brain, she hesitantly walked up the stairs, the creaking of the wood announcing her arrival.

“There you are love. Listen...I’m having Mr. Shelby come by soon so you’ll have to work in the back alright? I know you’ll get me for it later but I’ll make up for it mmkay?” He said, looking his now 21 year old daughter in the eyes. People often found him intimidating, but over the years she grew used to him, knowing deep down he was a sweet person. With every interaction she observed, she could see the pain in his eyes over not being able to really introduce her, knowing it would put her at risk. But deep down there was a mutual understanding between them that it was going to be inevitable that someone would find out, but neither of them thought it would be so soon.

With a sigh, she reluctantly walked towards the back where the other “bakers” worked the ovens and inspected shipments. While she organized bricks of cocaine for shipment, she felt her stomach drop as she realized she’d left her gloves in the front of the shop. She often hated the texture of the bricks as she packed them away, the fabric gloves being her only solace when she was given the task.

Swallowing hard, she nervously crept around the corner, eyeing Thomas Shelby and some of the other blinders in her fathers office as she continued, not noticing the man she collided with as she stumbled back slightly.

“Oi! I’m so sorry sir...wasn’t even fuckin’ looking.” She said, brushing a stray hair from her face and tightening her apron around her waist.

“No problem love, you alright?” He asked, looking concerned as he adjusted his well tailored suit.

“Y-yeah. Just looking for my gloves. I have to go.” She said, knowing she wasn’t supposed to be out for long while the blinders were there, yet trying to not look the dashing man in the eyes.

As she walked away, his eyes followed her to her station where she usually rolled dough and decorated pastries, grabbing her gloves which were tinted white from the previous cocaine shipment she handled earlier in the morning.

“Hey...miss? Before you go...what’s your name?” He asked, a crooked smile spreading across his features as she neared him.

“Uhm...it’s Y/N. What’s yours? You don’t look like you’re from ‘round here.” She said.

“I’m Michael, Michael Gray. I’m with the blinders.” He said.

“Oh....um, well I have to get going. It was nice meeting you...Michael.” She said, awkwardly putting on the gloves as he recognized the powder falling off them.

“What do you around here anyway? I know that’s not flour on those gloves.” He said with a smirk. She swallowed hard before answering, her eyes flicking to the window of her fathers office.

“Um...I bake, and...I organize things. Listen...I really do have to go. I’ll see you ‘round sometime, yeah?” She asked. He followed her gaze to the window, noticing the nervous look on her face.

“Alright. See you around, Y/N.” He said with a wink, walking back to his lookout spot in the corner.

She smirked slightly as she passed him, reluctantly heading straight to the back, the other workers paying her no mind as she resumed packing the bricks.

As she worked, she could hear shouts coming from her fathers office, her stomach tightening in knots at the tension she could see forming in the room. Thomas and him standing close to each other, most likely mumbling threats under their breaths. A few moments later, she saw the men exit the tattered room, putting their razored caps on and storming out the door. Michael ultimately leaving with them, but catching her staring as he looked back towards the room she was in. She smiled lightly as he smirked, shutting the door behind him.

She shook her head as she turned back, getting the rest of her packing done while shaking away the thought of someone like him ever taking an interest. She knew her father dealt in dangerous business, so she wasn’t afraid of the blinders and her father doing business necessarily, but she couldn’t deny that them feuding terrified her, knowing even one slip-up could put her or her father at risk. Blowing their years-long cover.

As she was lost in thought, Alfie walked down after they left, smiling as he grabbed a bottle of rum from one of the crates and locking it back.

“You don’t have to organize all those love. How about we go call it a day aye? I know you’re probably wanting summing’ because your old man made ya work back ‘ere all day.” He said. His words annoying to her ears as of late as she grew bored of her life at the shop and at home. One question forever buzzing in the back of her mind as she continued her monotonous tasks.

“I was wondering something....” She said, taking her gloves off and turning towards him.

“Yeah? Wondering about work or what? I’m all ears now you know.” He said, taking a swig from the bottle in his hand.

Her stomach tightened again as she looked her loving, yet over-protective father in the eyes.

“I was uh...wondering how you would feel if I moved out?” She asked, the thought barely working its way through her anxious mind before spewing out of her mouth.

“What?” He asked, his eyes squinting as he cocked his head to the side.

“I-I just think since I’m an adult now, I’d like to have a place of my own. That way I won’t come between ya and the business as much. I’m tired of hiding, dad.” She said, throwing the gloves on the table as she sat next to him.

“What devils gotten into your bones? Have you been sniffing the snow or drinking me rum?” He asked.

“No dad....I just...I just want to be more independent that’s all.” She said.

“I’ll tell ya what...if you pack the snow for the next month I’ll up your pay so you can get you a place. I’ll chip in some too but getting it on your own will be good for ya. I taught you to shoot but I didn’t teach ya about life aye?” He said.

“No not really. But spare me the lectures. Let’s get home. I’m starving.” She said.

“Alright. Let’s get on with it then.” He said, walking with his cane as they made their way to the car.

As the next few weeks passed, she found herself going into work with a smile. Knowing she’d get to work towards her own place, and for the chance to see the dapper blinder who’d been making regular appearances lately, and to her surprise, for more than business reasons.

He’d been sent by Thomas to crunch numbers and talk bets with Alfie, knowing that he was sent to handle more of the legitimate business than the illegal stuff.

But if Y/N learned anything throughout her years, it was knowing when to make herself known.

She waited until Alfie closed his office door, watching Michael walk down the creaky steps as she did a small whistle.

He turned around and grinned, walking towards her, as was becoming their habit recently.

“Y/N, didn’t think you were here, love. Must’ve been in the back again aye?” He asked, quietly. She nodded and led him to one of the women’s lavatories.

“W-why are we in here? I haven’t even taken you on a date.” He asked, a mischievous grin on his lips.

“Shh. There’s no other place right now for us to go. I haven’t told him.” She said.

“Told who?” He asked.

“My-my father. Alfie.” She said, nervously biting her lip as she removed her hand from his. Crossing her arms over her chest.

“Wait...your father is Alfie fucking Solomons?” He asked, his face hardening at the fact. His usual happy demeanor fading.

“Well, adoptive father. He uh adopted me when I was 16 from an orphanage ’round here. He wanted to protect me...from uh...people like you. I guess he’s had some bad history with the blinders and other groups so I’ve been most my life, just working here to pass the time.” She said.

“People like me? What...are you afraid of me?” He asked.

“What? No! I’ve been around dangerous men all my life. I’m just saying that your blinder cousins may not take a liking to me and neither will my father to you. I just have a bad feeling about it.” She said.

“So...what are we to do? Fucking talk in the bathroom every week or what?” He asked, a small smirk playing at his lips.

“We’ll do what I do best. We’ll have to hide.” She said. He looked at her with a confused expression as he put his hand on her hips.

“I get off at 4pm and my father won’t be home until late at night. I usually go straight home, but meet me at the warehouse later around 7pm, yeah?” She asked, seeing him smirk.

“Michael I’m deadly serious. If Thomas or my father finds out we’re as good as dead.” She said.

“Fine...I’ll meet you, but I want you to bring some of the snow. Can you sneak it out?” He asked.

“Yeah. Alright, now go, the workers are coming down the hall.” She said, hearing the plethora of Alfie’s men stomping down the dark hall, making it easier for Michael to slip out un-noticed.

“See you then, Y/N.” He said, pecking her cheek before he left.

She rubbed the spot, her cheeks flushing at the brief contact.

“Y/N?” Alfie’s voice rang from the hall, making her heart race as she thought of all the reasons he could be asking for her, internally praying that it wasn’t because he caught Michael leaving.

“Yeah dad?” She asked, quickly stepping out of the restroom.

“Thought ya ran off love. I was just gonna remind ya I’m working late again.” He said.

“Alright, how many nights are you working late?” She asked.

“Well, probably every day for this month. Thomas and the rest of his blinders are damn near making me lose me mind.” He said.

“Oh...ok. Well I’ll keep an eye on Cyril then. Is it ok if I go out to the shops later? Been wanting to stock up for the new place, for whenever I get it.” She said.

“I mean I’m not going to be there so I can’t stop ya can’t I? You can but remember your gun and that knife. You remember how to use it aye?” He asked.

“Yes dad, I can’t really forget stabbing a man for you, nor can I forget putting a bullet through his head.” She said, shivering slightly at the memory of when things got tense at the shop with a disgruntled employee. Alfie had beaten the man unconscious and dragged the man to the back, telling her that it would be good practice. And it was, but after it was done, she vowed to herself that she’d never use such weapons unless she had to.

“Right, well I have to go deal with some business. I’ll let you off at 4 like usual alright?” He asked.

“Okay, thanks dad. I’ll see you...I guess tomorrow depending on how late you get in.” She said giving him a hug before walking back to her station.

The last few hours dragged on as she reminisced over the past couple of weeks. Her heart skipped a beat thinking about how they’d secretly talk and make out behind the shop where her dad couldn’t see, and how on days like today she had to drag him into the restroom as her heart beat out of her chest at the rebelliousness of it all. It was nothing compared to what she planned to get away with tonight, and for hopefully weeks to come, but it was a small step towards her independence, even if they had to hide their relationship from the world.

As the clock struck 4 she headed towards the back of the building, snagging a bottle of rum from an opened crate and replacing it with one that had just came off the line for the night. Shoving the bottle in her purse as she grabbed a rather small brick of cocaine, it being one of the various runts in the pile they’d received that day.

With quick steps, she went out the door and down to the car that was waiting for her. The purse growing slightly heavy as she continued on. Her father didn’t want her walking home alone of course, and so he arranged for one of his men to routinely take her home, ultimately becoming a blessing and a curse for her independence she was so desperately trying to achieve.

“Hello Tim, I have an odd request today.” She said, counting the huge wad of cash in her purse she’d managed to save up well before asking about apartments

“What’s that Ms.Solomons?” He asked, hid old face wrinkling with a smile.

“Can we stop by the housing department? I’ve had my eye on an apartment for a few weeks. Don’t worry though, I’ve already gotten my fathers approval.” She said, pulling off her biggest lie yet.

“Alright, after that do you wish to go home? He asked.

“Yes please.” She said, watching as the streets zipped by.

Once at the housing department, she told the landlord where she’d like to stay and she followed her to the requested location. Her eyes lit up as she saw the rather grand place. It was just close enough that her father needn’t worry too much while also being just enough of a distance away from the shops she loved going to. It was a rather safe area given the town and her fathers plethora of men protecting her, but she enjoyed the new sense of independence as she gave the woman a cash deposit, along with enough for the years rent.

The woman’s eyes lit up as she saw the amount of cash, Y/N rather un-phased given her fathers business.

“Are you sure Ms.? This is so much in advance.” She said.

“Yes. When shall I move in?” She asked. Checking her watch and seeing it was just after 5pm.

“Oh I’d say ‘round any time next week. Here’s your key, just drop by before you begin moving in.” She said with a smile as she got in her car and left.

“Alright Tim, I’m ready to go home.” She said, a satisfied smile on her face.

“I’m impressed. You got this place yourself? Alfie must be proud.” He said.

“Mhmm.” Y/N said, nervously fidgeting with her hands as she remembered the lie. He’d have her neck if he knew she’d already bought the place earlier than he would’ve liked. But what could it hurt?

The minutes passed rather quickly as she was dropped off at her house, walking inside to see Cyril’s tail wagging as she came through the front door. The house was dimly lit and quiet, just as she’d left it that morning. She played with him and made sure his water bowl was filled, seeing as the maid would help feed him later, but she still loved helping wherever she could.

“Ms. Y/N, I have your dress ready. I’ll feed the dog later and make sure the house is kept before leaving. I hope you enjoy your date.” The older woman said, a genuine smile on her face.

“Thank you so much. I can’t tell you how much you’ve helped me these last few weeks. Here.” She said, giving her a few slips of cash from her purse.

“Just as a thank you. I’ll be moving in next week to my apartment. Dad doesn’t know though so I’d appreciate it if you didn’t tell him.” She said.

The maids eyes widened at the cash in her hand, agreeing with a small smile and a quick nod before returning to her duties. As much as she loved this house, she wanted to do things on her own terms. She wanted to meet people on her own terms, and finally not hide herself. To make more friends than just the maid. To start actually living.

With an excited smile she ran up the stairs, putting the casual dress on and doing her makeup, deciding to leave her hair as-is, then anxiously making her way outside. The purses weight tugging at her shoulder as she walked down the quiet streets, her gun in her purse and her small knife in hand.

Once she neared the warehouse, she sat around the back, taking a swig of the rum before Michael got there to calm her nerves.

She watched the sun set over Camden Town, the birds songs ending as the insects buzzed about, the air turning a bit colder as she looked at her watch. It was just after 7pm, her heart sinking in her chest as she thought he’d stood her up. But after a few moments, she heard footsteps, making her panic slightly not knowing who was behind them. She carefully drew her gun, aiming at the man as he walked closer, his hands soon up in surrender.

“Y/N? It’s me. Michael.” He said, a smirk on his face, lowering his hands.

“I figured you were ‘round back, didn’t think you’d try to shoot me though.” He said.

“Sorry. You never know out here.” She said, putting her gun away and retrieving the cocaine and rum.

“You carried all that here? I’m impressed.” He said, inspecting the cocaine as she opened the bottle, taking another swig from it. She cringed internally as the liquid burned her throat. She’d only drank a few times, not to any huge extent, but now that she was older and more capable, she figured she at least could drink how she pleased.

“How’d you score this rum?” He asked, taking a swig from the bottle as well.

“I stole it from my dads stash in the back. And that coke is one of the runts of the batch, it was too small to pack in the big crates. Figured I’d bring the whole thing since you seemed to know about it a couple weeks ago.” She said, smirking at the memory of their first awkward meeting.

“Have you tried it?” He asked, leaning back against the wall of the warehouse.

“No.” She said turning away from his gaze as she nervously brushed a strand of hair behind her ear.

“It’s easy. Watch.” He said, unwrapping it and shaving off a sliver of the white substance with her knife. He sat it on top of the brick and made sure it was all crushed, forming it in a straight line.

He handed her the brick carefully as she held it up towards his face, him inhaling the powder through his nose in one fell swoop.

“You want me to shove that shit up my nose? Are you mad?” She asked, giggling as she took another swig from the rum.

“Yeah. Can’t hide from everything love.” He said, his words hitting home probably more than he realized.

“Alright, if I die, my fathers gonna have your head on a spike.” She said.

“That’s a risk I’m willing to take.” He said, preparing a smaller amount of the drug and holding it up to where she could inhale it through her nose. Her nostril burned as she did so, the foreign particles lacing their way through her system.

She laughed and shook her head, wiping her nose of any excess powder as she looked up at Michael who was chuckling slightly.

“That was so odd. I’m not doing that again. Not right now anyway.” She said, handing him the bottle of rum as she curled up next to him. It had only been about a month since they’d met, but even then, their interactions became more frequent.

Over the next few weeks, it was as if they’d known each other for years the way they got on. His aunt Polly eventually seeing a spark in his eye that wasn’t there before, and the same went for Alfie.

“You’ve met someone. I can tell.” Polly said one night, catching him coming in drunk on more than one occasion.

“Yeah I did. Tommy can’t do anything about it. It’s not his concern so don’t go telling him.” He said as he stumbled into the house.

As Michael grappled with the weight of seeing an adversaries daughter, Y/N had gradually moved things into her apartment with the help of her driver, all under her fathers nose. But she knew that once her room was more vacant, he’d catch on. Knowing if the blinders didn’t anger him enough, her leaving suddenly surely would.

One night after a drunken date with her mystery boyfriend, Alfie confronted her. Holding the small brick they’d chipped away at over the previous weeks.

“Oi! You wanna explain this? No daughter of mine is going to be sneaking drugs in me house. Do you really think I’m dumb? Cuz I guarantee you I’m not. This can’t happen. Not under my roof.” He said, lighting his cigar.

“Well if you didn’t want to pack it anyway I thought I might as well put it to good use. But uh, I’ll be sneaking it under me own roof from now on. I’ve bought a place if you couldn’t already tell from barging in my room to find that.” She said, folding her arms like she often did when she was frustrated.

Alfie stepped closer to her, his eyes not leaving hers as she barely flinched.

“I’ll find out who you’re doing all this for. Once I do, you’ll wish ya never stole a thing.” He said, walking towards his chair he usually sat on in their grand living room.

Y/N shook her head and chuckled to herself, stomping off towards her room. Her mind raced as she thought about what to do, grabbing what was left of her clothes and hurling them into her suitcases, deciding to leave the house for good in the morning.

Alfie sighed and sat back in his chair as he heard Y/N rummaging around upstairs. The sweet girl he helped raise all of a sudden wanting to leave the nest. 

It seemed like everything was fine in their lives until the peaky fucking blinders waltzed into his shop. Not caring who they destroyed as long as they got their money, their rum, or their drugs.

[alwaysahiccupandastrid]

This Sarah Everard case is so terrifying for women. But not only am I terrified - I am furious.

⚠️ tw for mentions of r*pe, sexual assault, violence against women, murder etc. ⚠️

She was just walking, including walking by busy roads and not dark alleyways. She was dressed in winter clothes. Even if she HAD walked down a dark alleyway or been wearing something short or “revealing”, she still wasn’t doing anything wrong - she was just walking somewhere.

Her murderer - a police officer named Wayne Couzens - plotted to murder a woman to live out his perverse fantasy. He didn’t plot to kill a specific woman - he knew he would murder a woman, any woman he thought he could abduct, any woman who would be out at night on her own. Sarah was just there.

Not only did he drive miles and hours to kill a woman, not only was he a police officer… he used his badge, police belt, handcuffs and credentials to fake arrest her to get her into his car. If a police officer tells you to go with them, we’re told to not resist, to be obedient or we will be in even more trouble. Even if she HAD done what the MET have just said women should do - “question non uniformed officers!” - it wouldn’t have helped her because he was a police officer. He had the credentials. Why would she run away and resist a police officer? And if women do resist, the police commit violence against them (like at the Clapham Common vigil for Sarah).

He handcuffed her, drove her for hours, then raped and murdered her. This fucking monster strangled her with his fucking police belt. He burnt her body and disposed of her in a pond.

A police officer did this - a fucking police officer, a MET officer, the MET we’re supposed to trust. And you want women to trust them?!!

And I don’t want to hear that “don’t judge the whole profession based on one bad apple”, because guess what? This is not the first time a police officer has harmed a woman. There is misogyny rooted deep in the MET that needs to be addressed. Wayne Couzens was literally nicknamed “The Rapist” by other police officers and had offended in the past by flashing people, and that’s just what we know of - and yet not a single person did anything. The police joked about it. Several officers gave character references supportive of Couzens during the hearings for his sentencing, and female officers told the press that they did not feel as if they could report concerning behaviour by male colleagues.

It’s thought that at LEAST 15 serving or former police officers have killed women in UK since 2009, and HUNDREDS of UK police officers have convictions for crimes, including assault. There are many cases that do not go reported, and so it’s likely the numbers on both counts are actually higher. Why are they still allowed to serve? Why is our government giving them more power and freedom to arrest whoever they please? “It’s not that many” - IT SHOULD NOT BE ANY.

If you can’t see why there’s a huge problem with our police force and why we say “fuck the police”, you’re part of the problem.

And the fear and anger we feel isn’t new - this has been a problem for literally all of our lives.

At 11, I learnt to come home before dark, and if it was dark in the winter on my way home (meaning: every night in winter), I was taught to not go down any dark lanes, and if I was walking the dark lane I had to go down if I got the bus home, I was to walk as fast as I could and to not have earphones in because i wouldn’t hear attackers. Every day from September 2009 to July 2014, coming home from secondary school, I was told to either wait for my dad or grandad to pick me up or to walk down the busiest road that ran near my house and had constant cars on it. I couldn’t take the shortcut down the public footpath on my way home from sixth form college because it was too dark and isolated - I had to go around it and through the village instead, which took more time but was vaguely safer. Since university, I’ve made a point of waiting for the hourly bus that stops just round the corner from my home and on the busiest road, even though I have to wait up to an hour for it usually, because getting the bus that comes every 15 minutes means walking up the dark quiet lane.

At age 13, I learnt not to talk to even very friendly men, even not in broad daylight, even with a female friend, when some old man approached us and started complimenting us, telling us we had “nice smiles” and “I can hook you up with someone who can help you get into acting” and “here’s £10, you go down to the garage down the road and get whatever you girls want”.

At 14, I learnt not to sit in trees in the park by the gate, not even during the day when it’s sunny, when an old man entered the park, took one look at me, and said “you’ve got a nice arse”. I couldn’t prove he had said anything, and I would see him on my way to school sometimes and panic.

At 19, I learnt that I could not trust friendly men online. Apologies to any decent men I have spoken to online - there’s a few who are nice and not weird, I’m not talking about them. I learnt this when a guy I was speaking to on my old blog - who had for weeks just been generally nice and checking in on me - started to send intimate and sexual messages that started with “*hugs you*” and became “*spanks your ass*”, “takes your clothes off”, “f*cks you hard”, just to name a few (and these were the milder ones). When I asked his age, he merely said “older” than me - “more than twice as old as you”, actually. I learnt to not talk to men online, and if I did then I had to set very clear boundaries in a way that wasn’t too obvious - not say it outright but make it clear I am “unavailable”.

I have to carry a rape alarm on my keys, just in case. I could go out to bars if I wanted to, I could have at university when all my peers were - but doing it meant risking the chance of being harmed while intoxicated or on my way home. I have to send my location to my mother if I get any Ubers, if I go out to theatres or cinemas in the evening I have to text my mum to say I’ve arrived safe. I only feel safe out at night if I’m with a man that I trust like my dad or grandad - I got very lucky at Uni because not only did one girl make sure I got home safely at 1 in the morning by calling me a cab, but one boy even stayed with me on another night until my dad arrived to pick me up, because he knew leaving me intoxicated at 2:30 in the morning was dangerous. I have even phoned my grandmother while walking home in the dark because being on the phone to someone means you’re less of a target to an attacker.

Men do not have this experience - or, if they do, it’s nowhere near the fear and worry women feel every day. Women can’t even walk somewhere without being worried of being attacked - we cannot go anywhere without asking ourselves “am I safe?”. Are we wearing the “correct” clothing, so as to not give off the wrong idea? Are we walking down the well lit roads where it’s busy? Are we aware of our surroundings, of every single person nearby? Do I have my keys in my hand, ready to defend myself if I’m attacked? Women are blamed if we are attacked - not men, but women. “She was dressed slutty” “she was passed out drunk” “she was walking down a dark lane” “she was out late”.

When doing safe guarding training at my current TA job, I came across this phrase: “always think it can and will happen”. Just as a teacher or TA should not think “none of my students will be victims of abuse”, women should not for one second believe that they are safe and “it will never happen to me” - every day we have to think of how to prevent our own assault or murder, just in case.

Every time I’m walking home in the dark, I have the fleeting wonder of “what picture(s) of me will they use if I’m attacked or go missing?”. I was not really surprised when I saw that other women said the same thing. Women wonder it so often it’s almost a joke, an absent minded thought. But it’s not a joke - it’s real life for us, every single day.

Sarah Everard is not a one off case. Sabina Nessa, a 28 year old primary school teacher, was murdered on 18th September this year, her body discovered the next day by a dog walker. So far in 2021, 110 women have been murdered in the UK by men (or men are the prime suspects). Only a handful get national attention because at this point, violence and murder against women have become normalised in this country.

I am not only heartbroken for all of these women and their families - I am scared for my own safety; I am scared for the safety of my mother, my grandmother, my aunts. I am scared for the safety of my 20 year old sister, the safety of my 17 and 14 year old cousins, for the safety of my older male cousin’s two daughters who are only 4 and 1. I am scared for the safety of every single girl and woman I have worked with, the safety of every woman I have ever spoken to.

But I am also furious and filled with rage. Women should not be scared to go out or have fun, we should not have to take such precautions or measures that still won’t completely prevent our assaults or murders. I am sick and tired of the victim blaming when a woman is murdered, of the indifference of “oh another woman”, of this being how women are expected to live their lives.

I’m tired of this problem being ignored by our government, tired of no one giving a shit about us or our safety.

[fanficsandthings]

Through the Years, Ch. 6

A George Weasley Fanfiction

A George Weasley x Slytherin reader story.

Each chapter shares events in one year of George and reader’s life together.

Word Count: 4k

Author’s note: This year is going to be split up into 2 chapters, so ch 7 will be more of 6th year. I’m going on a short break after this chapter tho, so ch 7 will be posted April 23rd

Year 1, Year 2, Year 3, Year 4, Year 5 

Year 6:  Camping

The campsite was overcrowded and loud as you pushed your way past wizards decked out in green and white. Making your way past overly decorated and way-too-obvious tents, you kept your eyes out for a certain red headed family. You hadn’t seen George in nearly two months, and you were ready to tackle him on sight. 

As you neared the end of the campsite, you were starting to think that you might have missed the Weasley’s tent and would have to start your search again. A familiar voice caught your attention, and you turned to see a red headed girl coming out of a tent on the very edge of the campsite. Ginny was saying something over her shoulder as Hermione followed her out of the tent. 

“Ginny, Hermione!” you called, waving your hand in the air to get her attention. Both the girls turned to look in your direction. 

“Hey!” Ginny called back as she caught your eye. 

You rushed up to meet them outside their tent. They were both wearing the green and white colors of Ireland. 

“You two been having an exciting day?” you asked them. 

“Hermione taught dad how to light a fire the muggle way earlier,” Ginny told you. “It would’ve taken him hours to light one otherwise.” 

“Wish I could’ve been here to see that,” you said with a laugh. “At least he’s trying to blend in. Some of the wizards here don’t seem to care at all.” You gestured vaguely to the gaudy tents around you; the tent Ginny and Hermione came out of being the exception. 

“I feel kind of bad for the muggle at the entrance, Mr. Roberts,” Hermione said. “All those memory charms can’t be good for him.” 

You thought about how he had been Obliviated after he had said something vague about the events being held today when you paid for your campsite. “I hope it doesn’t affect his memory permanently.” 

A tall figure came out of a tent behind the girls’ tent. His long red hair was pulled back into a ponytail, and you could assume that he was another Weasley. 

“Have you met Bill?” Ginny asked.

“I haven’t,” you said. 

Ginny led you and Hermione over to Bill, who was beginning to clean up the remains of the fire. Ginny called his name, and he turned to face the three of you. 

“This is--” Ginny started. 

“George’s girlfriend,” Bill finished the sentence for her. You looked at him slightly confused as to how he immediately knew who you were. “George has talked about two things in the last few weeks that I’ve been home: Weasley Wizard Wheezes and the Slytherin girl that he finally got to kiss after over 4 years of having a crush.” 

You could feel your face burning red at the thought of George talking about you that much. 

“I’ve seen every one of those muggle pictures of you two at least 5 times,” Bill continued with a laugh. “He loves to show them off.” 

“He almost went through two of my camera’s last year,” you said. “Errol got lost delivering one back to my parents, and George was a few hours away from going out and looking for him himself when he showed back up with a letter from my mom confirming that they got the camera.” 

“Hey that photo of Snape asleep at his desk, drooling on his papers would’ve been worth the search if Errol really was lost,” Ginny said. 

“That picture has a place of honor on the mirror in my dorm room,” you said, turning to Ginny. “It gives me motivation to go to potions every morning. I’ve enchanted it so none of the other girls can take it down.” 

“Please let me see that picture sometime,” Bill said to you. “How did you even get into his office without him waking up?”

“That’s a secret between Fred, George, and I,” you told him. You turned to Hermione and said in a whisper, “I printed another copy to give to Harry as a thanks for letting me borrow his cloak. Don’t let me forget to give it to him.” 

Hermione’s face formed an expression you were very familiar with. “How do you know about--”

“Anyway!” you cut her off, turning back to the rest of the group. “Where are George and Fred? I have some words for them.”  

Bill opened his mouth to speak, but a rustling was heard from the tent that he had come out of. Everyone turned their attention to the entrance of the tent as two heads popped out. 

“Is that who I think it is?” George asked as he stepped out. 

“George!” you yelled, half in excitement, half in faux anger. Jumping at him, you both fell hard onto the ground. Luckily, your landing was softened by George. 

George was trying hard to catch his breath as he looked up at you. “I can’t tell if you’re happy or angry.”

“A bit of both,” you said while standing up. “My hair was green for almost two weeks before I figured out the counterspell.” You thought about reaching out to help him up but decided against it. “I helped you invent that potion, you’re not supposed to use it against me. I was excited that you sent me sweets only to end up with that.”

George struggled to his feet, rubbing his shoulder where he had hit the ground. “You look good in Slytherin green, so we thought we’d add a little more to your everyday flare.” 

You turned to Fred quickly. “It was your idea, wasn’t it?” 

“I may have suggested it, yes,” he said, not bothering to hide his smirk. 

“You’re lucky it did look good,” you grumbled, reaching into your bag. Pulling out a photo, you handed it to Fred. “Proof that you finally got it to work. Only took you two and half years.” 

“Perfection takes time,” Fred said, smiling down at the photo. “We’ve figured out green, pink, red, and blue so far.” 

“We’re working on yellow next,” George said as he moved to look over Fred’s shoulder at the picture of you. Your hair was the same color as the winter scarf hanging on the wall behind you. 

“Can I have that back then?” you asked, reaching your hand out for the picture. 

Fred pulled his hand away quickly. “No, we need it to show clients that it really works.” 

You narrowed your eyes at him before rummaging through your bag. “Test it on yourself next time.” You handed the twins the rest of the sweets they had sent you. Two more of the hair changing sweet and five of one kind that you were too afraid to test out without knowing what it was. “Start with that one there. I’d like to see what it’s for.” 

The twins’ faces lit up as they looked at the bag you had just handed them. George’s quickly changed to anger as he took in what was in the bag.

“You sent her the Ton-Tongue Toffee!” George yelled angrily at his brother “We decided we wouldn’t test that on her!”

“Oh boy,” Ginny whispered beside you. 

“Ton-Tongue Toffee?” you turned to ask her, the twins continuing their bickering in the background. 

“It’s an Engorgement Charm stuffed inside the toffee,” Ginny explained. “They actually just tested it out on Harry’s cousin. Mum was super mad. She confiscated the rest of their stock.” 

“She knows the counter-charm!” Fred yelled over his brother. “She’d be fine!”

“We agreed we wouldn’t test the more dangerous ones on her!” George retorted. 

“You agreed to that,” Fred said, crossing his arms. “I never said I wouldn’t” 

“Hey!” you yelled, catching their attention. “You tested this on a Muggle?” 

“Yeah,” Fred said, a proud smile on his face. “It worked perfectly too. Swelled his tongue up to about 4 feet long.” 

“Dad fixed him though,” George continued. “After a bit of arguing with Harry’s aunt and uncle.”

“They’re sure to think all magic users are the devil now,” Fred said, laughing. 

“From what I’ve heard, they already thought that,” you said. “You probably just made it worse for Harry now.”

Hermione cut in to say, “I tried to explain that to them, but they wouldn’t listen to me.” 

“You guys are idiots,” you said, causing the twins’ faces to fall just a little bit. “I’m glad you’re figuring out your stock though. Tell me more about it so I can give you more criticism.”  You walked towards the boys and took George’s hand. Looking up at the sky, you noticed the sun was starting to set. “I’ll have to get back to my family soon. The match should be starting in about an hour.” You started to walk with the twins a little bit away from their campsite before turning back to Ginny, Hermione, and Bill. “I’m sure I’ll see you again after the match. Nice meeting you, Bill.” You gave a small wave with your free hand as George pulled you towards the edge of the forest nearby. 

Once you were out of earshot, Bill leaned down to Ginny. “I like her. Fred and George have a deep disdain for most Slytherin’s but apparently not her.” 

“They taught her their evil ways before the other Slytherins could teach her theirs,” Ginny said, laughing. “It suits her well, I think.” 

The three of them watched you and twins for a minute. It looked like you were shoving one of the sweets in Fred’s mouth, and all three of them held their breath, hoping it wasn’t the toffee. Fred’s hair very suddenly burst into the Slytherin green color, and you and George both bent over laughing. Fred brought out his wand, presumably for the counter-spell, but George grabbed it from him before he could cast anything. George pulled his green-haired brother into an awkward hug as you pulled the camera out of your bag. The twins both smiled widely as you took a picture of them, Fred only pretending to be annoyed. 

Fred finally snatched his wand back from George as he pulled away from the hug and quickly changed his hair back to his natural bright orange. He reached his hand out towards your camera, and you handed it to him. He pushed George towards you, and you wrapped your arms tightly around him. You kissed George quickly on the cheek as Fred took a picture. When you pulled away from George, he pretended to be annoyed with the kiss as he wiped his hand on his cheek. As you shoved your camera back in your bag, though, George took advantage of your distraction and kissed you back. 

The rest of the boys came out of the tent, Arthur telling them that they should start heading to the stadium. 

“Fred! George!” Charlie called loudly, causing the three of you to stop your conversation about the Canary Creams the twins had started working on this summer. “It’s time to go!” 

“Hello, Charlie!” you yelled towards the group, waving. “I’ll stop by after the match again. I’ll see you guys then!” You said a quick goodbye to Fred and gave George one last chaste kiss before heading back towards your own campsite to find your dad and uncle. 

-----------------------------

You were woken by a sudden, loud crash outside your tent, causing you to jolt up in bed. At first you assumed the sounds outside were sounds of celebration, caused by the Irish winning the World Cup and celebrating all night long, but the closer you listened, the more you could hear screams and chaos. 

Your father came rushing in from outside. “Get up, we need to go.” 

“What’s going on?” you asked him, rushing to find your boots and pulling them on.

“It’s the Roberts family,” he said, trying to push you out of the tent. “They’re being attacked. Your uncle went to help them. Go find the Weasleys; you’ll be safe with them.” 

Your feet hit the grass outside the tent, and the scent of smoke filled your nostrils. The sky, once alive with green and white, was now grey and filled with the reflecting lights of the fire. Screams could be heard in every direction, while people rushed by in a panic, not knowing what way to go. You could see the Roberts family being suspended in midair a couple hundred yards away. The tents around them were going up in flames as the masked wizards carrying them incited more fear in everyone. 

Your father started to head in the opposite direction that you were about to go, so you turned to him. “Where are you going? If someone is attacking muggles, they might be after you too!” 

“I’m going to help the other Muggleborns and Muggle spouses. I know more about magic than most of them,” he said, stepping towards you again. 

“You have no way to defend yourself against dark magic,” you informed him. 

He grabbed your hand. “I’ll be okay. I promise. Now go, before you can get hurt.” 

He let go of your hand and ran off. You quickly turned around and headed towards the opposite end of the campground where you knew the Weasley’s tents to be. 

The crowd was hard to get through with people pushing you in every direction, and you lost your balance more than once, barely catching yourself each time. If you fell, you were sure to be stepped on by everyone rushing by. 

By the time you got to the opposite end of the campground, your lungs hurt from running, and your hands were covered in dirt from the ground. The group of masked wizards holding the Roberts hostage were slowly making their way over, and you knew you needed to find the Weasleys and escape into the woods to be safe. 

Searching around frantically, your eyes found the Weasley’s tents, and you ran towards them. Not bothering with privacy, you rushed into the larger of the two. 

“Hello?” you called out, looking around the apartment-like interior, but you heard no response and saw no sign of movement. Taking that to mean they had already left, you rushed over to the girls tent to make sure they were out too.

“Ginny? Hermione?” you shouted as you ran. Looking in the tent, it seemed to be empty too. 

With no one in sight, your best option was to head to the woods, and hope they all made it there safe. Your eyes still searched frantically over the moving crowd as you hurried towards the trees. 

“George! Fred!” you called, hoping to see any sign of bright red hair. You could feel your heart beating frantically in your chest. Your lungs felt like they could collapse at any moment. “Anyone!” Your voice was showing the first signs of becoming hoarse as your breath got caught in your throat as you yelled. 

“They headed towards the trees!” a familiar voice called from behind. You whipped your head around so fast you weren’t sure how you didn’t fall over. Standing a few feet away was Bill, wand at the ready, a mixed look of fear and anger on his face. 

“All of them except you?” you asked, rushing towards him. 

“Dad, Percy, and Charlie went to help stop this madness,” Bill informed you. “I heard you calling, so I came back to help. I should go join them now. The twins took the younger ones into the woods to hide. You’ll be safe if you go there too. Keep your wand ready, just in case.” 

You suddenly searched frantically for your wand, feeling stupid for not having it out before now. You found it tucked in a special pocket in your boot. “Thanks for the advice.” 

“A boot pocket?” Bill said, sounding impressed. “I might need to get me one of those.” 

“Comes in handy in situations like this,” you told him. You squeezed the end of your wand in your hand, the memory of the first day you got it suddenly rushing into your mind. It was the day you had met Fred and George. You suddenly looked from Bill to the trees, thinking about the rest of the Weasleys in the woods. “I have to go. Thanks for helping.” 

You hurried off without waiting for him to say anything, too focused now on finding other people you knew. People that you needed to make sure were safe more than you needed yourself to be safe. Hopefully Fred and George were looking after the others, but four bodies is a lot to keep track of. With you there, the three of you could do a better job at it. 

Reaching the treeline, you stopped for just a moment to look back at the chaos in the campsite. The group of masked wizards seemed to have come to a halt from being surrounded by Ministry workers. The shouts of all the people running around you, also looking for loved ones, were too loud to make out any conversation from the large group. 

“Ron? Ginny?,” you shouted into the woods, looking for a clear path to run down. You quickly decided that a path would be impossible to find in this situation, and started stepping over bushes and sticks before breaking out into a jog.

Your eyes scanned the trees around you, hoping to find a familiar face or six. The more you searched to no avail, the more it hurt to breath again. Your breath felt ragged in your throat, whether from the running or the yelling of names, you weren’t sure.

You weren’t paying too much attention to where you were going, besides making sure you didn’t trip over anything. Turning around a rather large tree, you jumped over the roots, but your body came to a very sudden halt when you hit something full force. You fell to the ground, all the breath in your body leaving you. 

“Jesus Christ,” you breathed out as you lay on the ground. 

“Are you alright!?” a familiar voice asked as they reached down to help you up. 

“George!” you shouted, pulling him down to you instead, hugging him. “Did I just run into you?”

“You did,” he told you, pulling back to look you in the eye, “but that doesn’t matter. I know you’re safe now.”

You looked behind him to see Fred and Ginny “Where are Harry, Ron, and Hermione?”

“We don’t know,” Fred said. “They got separated in the rush.”

“But Hermione knows enough to be able to protect all of them,” George added quickly when he saw the panic on your face. “I’m worried about you.”

“Don’t worry about me, worry abo--” you started, but were cut off by a sudden flash of green appearing in the sky. 

The light lit up the entire woods, and through the trees you could make out the shape of a giant skull. People all around you began to scream again, scattering to run as far away from the light as possible. It was then that you saw the snake coming out of the skull’s mouth. 

“A Dark Mark,” you whispered, clinging onto George’s shirt even tighter. Your body seemed to tense up at the words you spoke, but you couldn’t seem to tear your eyes away from the skull. 

“Hey, look at me,” George said, but your eyes remained on the sky. He placed his hand on your cheek and softly turned your face to look at him. “Don’t look at that. Just look at me, and everything will be alright. 

George’s brown eyes scanned your face quickly. You knew he was waiting for you to give any more indication about what you were feeling. The tears behind your eyes suddenly ran down your face. You quickly pulled yourself into George, hiding your face in his shoulder. 

You felt a hand gently pat your shoulder, and you looked up to see Ginny looking down at you. 

“It’ll be alright,” she said softly. You knew she didn’t know too much about your situation, or even exactly what the Mark meant, but you greatly appreciated her trying to comfort you. 

“You and your dad are welcome to stay in our tent for the rest of the night,” Fred offered. “I’m sure dad won’t mind.” 

Finally backing away from George just a little, you looked at his face again. You could tell that he was trying not to cry himself, his feelings for you overtaking him right now. You leaned in and softly kissed both of his cheeks.

“Thank you,” you whispered to him. You turned to the other two. “Thank you so much.” 

“Let’s go see if the campsite is safe now,” George said, standing up. He held out a hand to help you up. You gladly accepted it. 

The walk back was stressful; you were worried that you might run into one of those masked wizards. When you reached the treeline and stepped out into the campground, you could tell that that group was gone, but another group of frightened-looking witches and wizards was beginning to form. They were looking for answers about what had just happened, but having no answers for them, you squeezed through them and made your way back to the Weasley’s tents. 

Your father had shown up looking for you just a few minutes after you had arrived. He was fine, just a little shaken from seeing the Dark Mark again after so many years. He chose to stay with your uncle in their tent, and you promised you’d meet up with them again first thing in the morning. 

The rest of the night was restless, and the hour or so of sleep you ended up getting did little help to make you feel better. The next two weeks before the start of the school year would be hard to get through, knowing that You-Know-Who supporters were becoming active again. 

You said your goodbyes to the Weasleys in the dim light of the morning, telling Fred and George that you would be waiting for them on Platform 9 ¾ in two weeks. 

“You better have those Canary Creams ready for testing by then,” you said, trying to lighten the mood of the day. 

“You offering to be the guinea pig?” Fred asked with a smile. 

“No,” you said, “but I have a few people in mind. We need some form of entertainment on the train.” 

The conversation lulled for a second, and George took the opportunity to grab your hand. 

“Be safe, okay?” he said. 

“You know I never am,” you said, trying to continue to joke. George looked at you with his eyebrows slightly raised, and his eyes pleading with you. “Okay, okay. I promise I’ll be safe. It’s only two weeks.” 

“I’ll see you then,” he said, pulling you into a hug. He whispered softly so only you could hear, “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” you whispered back, squeezing him tightly. 

You walked back to your tent slowly, taking in the destruction of the campground and watching the other families pack up. You didn’t know why, but you had a strange feeling in your stomach the whole walk; a feeling that usually only happened when you were absolutely furiously angry at something. You thought you were more afraid from last night than angry, but you couldn’t get the whirl in your stomach to go away. 

The sun was fully peaking over the horizon by the time you made it to your campsite, your uncle having just finished packing everything up. A day that was supposed to be a joyous occasion had turned into the most disastrous event you had ever witnessed. You hoped that the coming school year would bring more joy than anything else.

[mooshs-crack-headcanons]

Hello if the request is still open. Could I get headcanons that if dante has a daughter how would she get along with dante, vergil and nero (post dmc5)? Thanks!

Hello! Just a heads up for the future! This was a very different type of request for me to write and next time I get a request like this in the future I'm not going to accept it! But I really hope you liked this one anyway!

Well, it's kind of a given that either way that she's going to be one; be a devil hybrid and going with the tread I'd say that she would hold the family trait silver hair, and two; have Sparda's blood through her veins which in turn makes her a dignified badass. 

I would say that most likely that her mother would be a human making her a quarter demon just like Nero, and for the sake of this request I'm going to have her age be around Nero's. 

His daughter would most likely work at the office, since you know 'family business' and all and would work on phone duty while her father's out on jobs and take in small jobs on her own just to try and keep the electric and water from getting shit off (dad just has a talent for not paying bills after all) 

I'd say despite being the overgrown man child Dante is, he'd be a good dad. He's fun and super easy to hang around, but he can get awkward as hell when certain topics come up; ex dating/love advice, and if his s/o, Lady, or Trish is around he'll most likely push it off on them to deal with. 

He does go on quite a few jobs that last him over a few days quite often, so I can see him taking her to Fredi's out to eat and have some quality father-daughter time. He also likes to take her on jobs (that he knows for a fact aren't world saving) with him and hunting together is another bonding exercise. 

All of the awkward bad dad jokes. All of them. 

He likes telling her stories about her grandmother and all of her teachings she taught him and Vergil, because he knows she would've been proud of the fine woman his daughters become like he knows he is. 

Dante has told his daughter quite a few stories about Vergil over the years, nothing too specific in his death or ever mentioning his corruption at Mallet Island, but enough for her to know that her uncle was a stubborn asshole who lost himself in lust for power. So when it came time to meet him after he and her father returned from hell was...weird. She knew that her father and him were twins but seeing it in person was off putting, even if a normal person couldn't tell by just glancing at them, she can tell that even if one has clearly aged more than the other that they're still if fact identical deep down. 

Vergil deep down feels really guilty after every he'd down up to the ending of 5 and he's made an attempt (keyword: attempt) to get a connection going with his family again, he made amends with his brother (though still sharing the rivalry) and is trying to get into his son's life, so of course he's going to try his best to at least get to know his niece but given this is Vergil and communication isn't exactly his strongest suit so it's going to take quite some time. 

Vergil himself originally thought as V that Nero was Dante's son, so seeing his daughter for the first time isn't that shocking to him. What is shocking to him is how...nice she treats him. With her being Dante's spawn he would've expected her to be more - how would he put it? More like Dante's spawn? (Vergil please stop calling children spawn) But no, she's more calm and collective and even brings up a conversation about Blake's work with him from time to time and it completely baffles him to no end but deep down he really appreciates it.

Like most things, Vergil finds hunting to be where he feels his best so it's no surprise that in his 'connection attempts' that he goes on jobs with his niece. Going on jobs with Vergil is very different then going on jobs with Dante, she quickly comes to realize. On jobs with her father, they'd tend to stick together as a team and he'd show off all of his stylish skills just to show her that: "Her old man still got it." Vergil on the other hand tends to like going on jobs alone, and even the first few times when he has 'agreed' to let his niece tag along at first he always keeps his distance to do his own thing but he doesn't travel far enough so that he can still see what she's doing, she has the blood of Sparda after all so she should be able to impress him. But after they've bonding for a bit Vergil doesn't travel off as far, far enough so that both of them have their own proper battle space but close to where if need be he can quickly trick over if the chance if she is about to have a fatal call with a demon and he can come to her rescue. But from what he's learned about his niece is that she's learned what Dante has taught her by heart and is very skillful at what she does so instead they can have friendly banter with one another during these missions. Vergil is very proud of his niece. 

Even though the thought confused the ever loving hell out of him that the old man somehow, Nero and Dante's daughter were friends before they found out they were cousins, they knew they were somehow related with Sanctus' confirmation to Nero during 4 but they never knew how far it went. At that time no one but Dante knew, and Lady would joke about Nero just being a kid that Dante forgot about or something but of course with Dante being Dante he chilled it out saying if he had another kid he would know about it and saying nothing about it further. 

Nero would hang around the shop for a good while after the events of 4, still feeling lost and confused about how his whole life was a lie with the Order and wanting to get stronger with his inner demon to protect the most important person left in his life at that point; Kyrie. Speaking of which, Kyrie would also tag along to the shop feeling confused and lost as the brainwashing of the Order slowly would fade away as she grieved for her brother's life. I'd say this is where Dante's daughter would pitch in and try to help out the both of them the best that she can whether it be by training for hours with Nero or being a big emotional support and a shoulder to cry on first Kyrie, which all earns Nero's respect. 

Because of that respect, during 5 she actually spent the whole game in Fortuna with Kyrie and the kids. Deep down she was so upset and angry at herself that her father's somewhere lost in that fucking tree Redgrave after seeing his defeat first hand when she went with Nero (who at the time she was visiting after Kyrie called her about Nero's lost arm) and that 'mysterious bastard' V. For the whole month she spent beating herself up over it, she knew her father wasn't dead; he defeated three demon overlords in his lifetime! Three! But seeing him actually fall to an enemy...terrified her. She'd wished to go back to Redgrave the agreed time but Nero asked her to watch Kyrie and the kids in his place and she just...couldn't refuse. 

Nero's easy to make flustered and embarrassed and it's hilarious if you just make simple jokes about how dorky he gets around Kyrie like how he does that scratch/rubbing at his nose thing with a big dumbass grin on his face. Both Dante's daughter and Nico both enjoy flustering the shit out of him, and because of that Nico and her are good friends (and once she leaves Nico makes it very clear to Nero that his cousin is hot, which again gets Nero's goat) 

Nero and Vergil of course still have a very rocky relationship even after 5 (which again understandable when your parent yanks off your arm and all) so since him and his cousin have a good relationship, he tends to go to her for advice, after all she's had her entire life with her dad and he's only had a dad for the last few months tops. 

Either way this family might be hella dysfunctional, but I'd say she'd wouldn't rather have it any other way. 

If you like what you read please consider reblogging! It means the world for writers and artists!

[arent-you-scared-lil-human]

Bølger (2)

Merman!Kae x Reader.

Words: 3,183

bølger means waves.

Chapter 1.

Merfolk were almost divine to your eyes, living near the coast gave you the blessing of discovering these amazing creatures, well, or the thought of actually seeing them. 

You were 7 when your mother gave your guard to your aunt Betty, your mom grew sick and she wanted to be sure you would be cared for when she passed. But it took her cancer to reach stage 4 to allow you to live with Betty. 

The thing was, your mother hated the coast, the town, and the ocean.

When Betty went to visit you, she would take small cards with fairies, merfolk, werewolves painted on it. She would tell you to believe in magic and accept that we aren't alone on the big blue planet.

Which made your mother mad because she hated the mere idea of mermaids, so much that the little mermaid movie was never allowed. But she had to swallow her revulsion to be sure you would be cared for and not thrown on the orphanage in the end.

So you went to live on Walrey Coast with your aunt. She was a good woman, a bit light-headed but good nonetheless. She taught you how to cook, even though you hated it, taught you how to work in her small restaurant and how to read and love Julio Verne's work. 

The house was small but notably comfy and colorful, each room had a color and somehow it didn't get overwhelming. Your bedroom had fairies painted on the walls, and a lamp with a mermaid painted in gold.

But you never saw a mermaid or a merman in your life.

And since your city was a small place each person ended up knowing another.  You were homeschooled till your 11, but Antony -your aunt friend- told that his nephews were your age and that his sister could teach you too.

Antony's nephews were three, a girl called Hope, and two boys, Archie and Hunter. Hope and Archie were twins, and Hunter was a year younger but their mom taught them the things at the same time so they could always be together if they ever went to a "normal" school.

So, with your 20's and seeing Archie leaving the town to persuade his dream university made you happy, but sad in seeing Carla's tears, after all, she always wanted her kids together.

"C'mon, Y/N, I consider you like a daughter so let us re-form your brother's bedroom..." Carla tried to smile through her tears, Hunter hugged you and Hope rolled her eyes at her brother's trial of reaching your interest, the poor boy has been crushing over you for 6 years already.

You kept your routine of woking at your aunty Betty restaurant, Antony tried to coax you to leave town and go to uni -as every elderly person tries to tell us to-; But something held you in Walrey Coast, maybe it was the trauma of the last time that you left your home was due to a loved one passing, or maybe Betty being abandoned in her big picturesque house... or who knows, perhaps something else, something unseen, or forgotten.

Hope didn't want to go to university, she craved to open an auto-shop, Carla said she didn't mind, but everyone knew deep down she wanted her small girl to be the perfect wife-to-be. And Hunter wanted to become a biologist, the boy adored the sea more than the air he inhaled and after years and years of Antony pulling his ear telling him that the idea of being a professional surfer was as idiotic as his hair, he swallowed down and picked another profession that connected the sea, too.

You loved them, and the town, but you were lonely. You had your first kiss, and even that you studied in "not a homeschool but it was basically one" you knew the other people in town, the men in their 20's that lived near and also the visitors that came and go. And working in the restaurant you saw lots of people, soldiers, biologists, families, even sailors, travelers, wanderers, et cetera. 

So you had your 'first times' but nothing serious, and even that Hunter tried several times to date you, you couldn't see him farther than a brother. He was attractive, smart, polite, liked animals as you do but he was... a brother. Through and through.

So your life was based around this minimalist and simple presence. Waking up, helping Betty at home, go to the restaurant, visit Carla and your dear friends, go back to the restaurant, sit in the pier where Antony lived while you ate your dinner looking at the sea, go home, shower and sleep.

Antony tried to make you go swimming or try to surf with Hunter, but you were terrified of the ocean, you loved it, it was fascinating and very very beautiful, but scary.

Dangerous.

Yet, gazing at it brought you a level of peace that couldn't be accomplished in any other form.

So finishing your meal and making sure to set any trash inside a bag so you could throw in the trashcan later, you stood up and gave one last look at the dark waters and went home.

Deep in the waves, stood Kae, gazing at you leaving your favorite spot in the docks, each day you went there and in each one he approached the surface to make you company, a silent one.

Sometimes you hummed a song, one that of course he had not heard before. And sometimes you would put music to play in a small black device he saw humans carrying around all the time, the music was a mixture, but he enjoyed them, and loved when you sang along.

Merfolk took singing into high consideration, it was important to lull food, to find a good partner, to... well, everything!

And he hummed back with you, but he knew you didn't hear him. You didn't remember him.

It was funny how different worlds that co-existed, should know about another, should collide.

Humans are evil, everyone says. But what Eros did with you wasn't it? Hurting an innocent cub, or better saying: a child, and bringing your unconscious body as a trophy was the most repugnant thing he ever witnessed. After that episode years prior, Kae never glanced at his cousin in the same way, Eros was still family, but he wasn't the good merman Kae thought he was.

And with their adult forms and getting the spot of protectors of the ocean society, the mating season was approaching. 

Jaxi was in love with a mermaid that was from oceans away, they found each other in a hunt for food and after that, they've been planning their wedding ever since. Melin grew to be an insatiable lover, the mating season was an open feast to him, especially since it didn't involve a mandatory loyalty. Eros had the most beautiful sea creatures he could find, he was handsome and strong, but he was a player, which wasn't so shocking.

And Kae had some encounters, had his first sex in his 16's but he didn't like the notion of marrying and being away from the bare soil, away from his little friend that didn't even remember his existence.

He wonders if you still have Eros's nails wounds scarred in your skin, or maybe you healed after he rolled the algae around it? The alkaline water helped sea beings to heal and regenerate their skin, maybe oxygen did it too to humans? And if it hasn't healed, have you ever questioned the origin of it?

Kae didn't see himself as a stalker, he was more of a curious merman. And after leaving you in the waves near the sand, he has been reaching the surface searching for you. Ecthelion realized his peculiar interest in you, so he at least told Kae that his human friend, Antony, has told him that you were alive and well. And that the human's healers said you declared that you floated too deep in the ocean and the waves took you away.

Only that.

And as much that was a relief to hear you didn't remember the evilness Eros committed, Kae was still disappointed that you wouldn't remember him, or Jaxi and Melin that were also very much curious about human's anatomy and helped to save your life.

He wanted to talk to you, to see how different you are, would it be shocking for you to see him? Would you run away seeing his different form? He was very pretty, and one of the most desired young merman between the merfolk, but their physiology are different for various reasons. Maybe you wouldn't think he is pretty, his monster form would push you away. Scare you.

               ...

Hunter lost his mind, inviting you to go surfing? Insane.

"You know I'm afraid of the sea,  Hunter!" You told him and your friend only shrugged.

"Y/N, i know but we can try. There won't be big tides today, and I'm an expert at it."

His sad voice made you feel bad, you loved him dearly but couldn't answer his romantic feelings. "Is just... we are not kids anymore and with our brother away and Hope getting you away for 'girls night i barely have time with you. And i don't want to be an asshole, i swear, but that accident that happened years ago was an accident. You were a kid and now you're all grown."

Yu chuckled and hit his shoulder slightly. "All of this only to convince me to go with you?"

He narrowed his eyes and gave you a shy smile. '"Only if you say it worked."

"It did. But! If the waves get too big or anything we will come back, alright? Don't try to prove a point."

"And which point would that be?" He seemed offended.

"That you know how to suffer."

"Right, I won't do anything stupid."

                       ...

Carrying Hope's board firmly you questioned if the straight material could hurt your palms. "Come on." Hope yelled cheering you up, she agreed with Hunter that it would be good for you to test the waters. Being afraid of it was a dangerous thing.

Hunter extended his hand while his other one was carrying the board under his arm. "Trust me?"

"Yeah, but please if I want to come back help me."

"Don't worry."

You held his hand and walked to the waters, Hope clapped her hands a couple of times yelling "you got it" to give you motivation.

It was a pretty day, the sun was out but it wasn't awfully warm Some seagulls flew through the skies and you admired the blue water touching your skin.

The water wasn't cold, and so far no big waves came and snatched your nor Hunter's life.

"Now in the way we tried back there." Hunter held the surfboard you were firmly grasping and helped you to jump on it. He did the same on his and held your hand looking at you with nothing but honesty.

You laid your chest on the board and moved your arms in the water to push you a bit far from the sand. Hunter was smiling, he adored the ocean and adored you so he was very happy.

A small wave came and you looked at him. "Hunt!"

He didn't tell you to go, he gave you a tiny nod and told you the two of you could swim around until you felt more relaxed.

After some minutes you tried to surf in a tide, it was small, amen for that, and Hunter seemed proud. He went to the bigger ones and even when he fell in the salty water he would emerge smiling and laughing.

Hope entered the water too and swam around, you never swam with your friends before.

Some minutes passed and you lost your fear from the ocean, the salty water, the rays of sun, Hunter's smile and Hope's laugh was a blessing and you wondered why you never gave Hunter a chance when he asked you to surf with him since you two were 12.

A medium-wave came in, and you told them you would try. Hunter has surfed and tides four times bigger so he was secure you wouldn't get hurt.

You moved your arms in the water to push you near the growing wave, you managed to feel it moving the surfboard, and you got on your feet and yelled in euphoria when your body kept firm above it. It was amazing, a sensation of pure joy.

The adrenaline, the beauty on it.

Hope and Hunter were cheering you up, and you smiled at then before noting a big movement near the tide, head got out of the ocean and the creature knocked your breath out of your lungs.

Was it... a mermaid? Well, better saying a merman?

"What?" You lost balance and fell into the water, the string holding the surfboard to your ankle made a pressuring pull and you whimpered at the pressure. You shut your eyes as the salty water burned your eyes but soon your foot was realized from the surfboard-pull.

You opened your eyes terrified that you lost the board because you were being dragged further in, but you saw something, someone. 

The strong features, the gills on his neck, the floating long hair... the tail. 

"Y/N!" Hope yelled. "Where are-", "Y/N!" Hunter yelled too.

He swam to you and leaned in, you got terrified, the water was burning your eyes, the lack of oxygen making you anxious and this creature was placing his hands on your cheeks. The cold hands made you stare at him but he only leaned in to kiss your forehead and then your nose. 

Hope's and Hunter's yells going deaf to your ears. You could only stare at the merman.

Before you could do anything else he smiled and touched your feet pushing you up to find oxygen.

You broke out of the surface and coughed as Hunter pulled your body to his chest. "Jesus Christ! You scared me." He said and kissed your forehead over and over making sure you were alive under his touch.

Hunter's kisses were gentle, urgent, and you enjoyed them, but it wasnt like the creature's touch. 

The monster's touch that could certainly snap your neck in a fraction of seconds, but the same touch that made your heart beat faster a moment prior.

And when he held your feet... you thought he would pull you in, to kill and eat you.

No.

He launched you up, assisting you, freeing you!

"I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have brought you." Hunter cried and you leaned in his touch, holding his neck and looking over his shoulder seeing familiar eyes gazing at you miles away in the water.

                       ...

Sitting in Hope's bed and having her blow-drying your hair, you told Hunter for the 45° time that you were okay and wasn't his fault. He gave you a cup of hot chocolate and checked your fingertips again searching for any hint of extremity cyanosis. He was terrified of losing you, shit, he even argued with Hope when he told her he wanted to help you to take a shower. And even if crushing on you, his intentions weren't sexual, he only wanted to be sure you were warmed up.

"It's okay, it was my fault. I thought I saw something. I got distracted."

Hope brushed your dry hair and you held Hunter's big sweater closer to your chest, he was taller than you so his clothes were the most comfortable. "Hope, i'm sorry for-"

"No no, it's okay. The thing was old anyway." She hugged you from behind and assured you it was okay the loss of her surfboard. "But i wonder how the safe-string got out of your ankle."

You remembered the pressure the string was making, remember the relief it was when it was snapped away from you... the merman did it.

"I don't know either." You lied and tried to get up, only to have them push you back in Hope's bed and ordering you to rest.

Hunter called your aunt to tell her it was all okay and that you would have a sleepover.

You fell asleep, dreaming of waves and gentle touches.

                         ...

Waking up you looked at the covers and searched for a clock to see how long you've slept. It was 2 AM and Hope was passed out, you gently got up from the bed and grasped a pair of Hope's boots.

You got off the stairs and unlocked the door discreetly before closing it behind you.

You walked to the docks and sat in your dining-spot. The vision of the water moving slowly under the stars always eased your thoughts. 

Yes, you consumed a bit of seawater but you didn't imagine what you saw. "Hey, uh, thank you for saving me." You spoke, feeling stupid and looking over your shoulders to be sure no one was near to listen to your nonsense.

"I... nearly drowned and if it wasn't you... I... Fuck!" You swore under your breath. The quietness of Walrey Coast at the dark night was comforting, silence was everything, it meant peace.

Holding your legs together and leaning your head on your knee, tears formed in your eyes. You missed Archie, you felt bad for making Hunter so worried, for destroying Hope's surfboard, the silence that engulfed you, and the thought of going crazy.

As tears drop reached the water, Kae got the courage to break out of the surface. He cursed himself so much earlier on, he should have reached you, if you haven't seen him you wouldn’t fall. So saving you was nothing less than his obligation. 

And touching you... well, that's another story. He couldn't help himself, you were so soft, so grown and stunning. Watching you from afar was something, but perceiving you centimeters away was enchanting.

With your eyes closed, you moaned a song that you loved, and even that the music spoke about heartbreak and a lost lover... it was beautiful.

Stopping to hum while you cleaned your nose, you opened your eyes startled when the song kept resounding,

Widening your eyes you looked at the water and placed your hands on your mouth to avoid a scream to leave your mouth.

There he was, the same thing that saved you.

"Hm, hi-hi!" You gagged.

Kae looked down at his torso, he hated how the human guy held you in his arms early on. His chest was free of hard skin, freed of scales, his skin color was near yours... it wasn't pale as his.

"Maybe you don't speak my language, I, uh actually I'm sort of believing i'm dreaming. My name is Y/N."

The smile on your features was all he could see, the previous shriek apparently wasn't from his ugly self. But surprise, or so he hoped.

"I know," His stark tone of voice made you gasp, he spoke! He could speak, and your language! "Hi, little human."

                       🧜🏻‍♂️