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#and i've been saying this for. a year and a half. minus two months. when volume 1 came out someone tweeted 'what the duffers fail to
maddy-ferguson · 7 months
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when people who like seasons 1 and 2 better explain why it was better they always lose me when they say "the characters were what mattered the most the supernatural plot was basically not that important it was ALL about the characters" like...that's just what YOU were more interested in not what was happening in the show? like wdym the supernatural plotline wasn't that important in seasons 1 and 2. saying that it was more balanced or more subtle i get but saying that the supernatural plot wasn't THAT important and that it's not what made anyone love the show is a blatant lie
#and like i say: brf slt#and i've seen people say this many times on many occasions i'm not even exaggerating. or making anything up#and i've been saying this for. a year and a half. minus two months. when volume 1 came out someone tweeted 'what the duffers fail to#understand is that no one watches st because they care about the russians or whatever. people watch st to see a ragtag group of kids be#nice to each other! to see a lesbian and a man with nice hair be friends!' and i said i agree with this at like 60% the 60% being ofc that#i hate the russia stuff we know this. but like. as much as i like the relationships between the characters if there's no life-threatening#things going on for more than a few dozen minutes...then i don't really care like that would be another show. (this has been a constant#i was not as into the show or the characters as i am now when i said that like volume 1 was my first time watching the show#since 2019. and it's a constant because it's still true) like that's literally what fanfic is for. or other shows.#and plenty of people watch stranger things for the russians or whatever i was actually surprised when people were ranking the subplots i#saw quite a lot of people put russia in their top 2 i was stunned. it was mostly older people older people meaning anyone who was 22 in#the past. i'm kidding but like idk people who were like 40+ and also guys? idk. like there's actually an audience for that my bad you guys#(not my bad i will always be a russia in st anti. because i hate it.)#my point is. no that was actually it. i just don't get it wdym people don't like the STORY plenty of people do. in the fandom especially i#totally get focusing more on the characters and being more interested in that i literally never talk about the supernatural plot and i#really like the characters yk and i understand when people say that they enjoyed the distribution between character things and supernatural#plot things in s1-2 more but saying that the supernatural stuff was like an afterthought and that no one actually cares or cared ever and#that it was never important is? like i get where they're coming from but also...no#and i get doing the 'if you don't take it as literally the monsters and supernatural plot things mean this and that for real life and for#the characters' i think it's very fun but like. if you don't like the genre and ignored it for the characters...?that's not really on them#i worded this like my joyce and bob post from july i hope you like it. the first sentence only#wait i actually didn't. just realized. false advertising sorry#saying this as someone who likes seasons 1 and 2 better too that goes without saying
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neopuff · 10 months
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Little timeline I've been using in my GenRex fics. I know there's only supposed to be one year between Six finding Rex and Promises, Promises, but I don't like that it's such a short amount of time so I made it two years lol It's fine, I can ignore canon sometimes (slams my head thru drywall) I'm good at that it's fine
Rex is presumably 14 when Six finds him. They celebrate his 16th (or ?) birthday in Nov 2010, but when Caesar arrives they would learn Rex's real birthday (I picked April 'cause I wanted something earlier in the year) and so Rex would be 17 in S3
I also really want Rex to have had a blackout at some point while at Providence. I would've liked it to be earlier but the timeline really doesn't work out lol I mean it doesn't really work in timeline anyway but I don't caaaaaaare. Six says "You only remember the last 18 months" in Wasteland, which I assume is letting the audience know that 6 months have passed between Promises, Promises and Wasteland but I'm just shortening up that timeline. They can rebuild Providence HQ faster than that it's alright
Some notes:
One would've been an EVO for more than 5 years in Divide By Six but I figure it's okay to round down. 5 years sounds more dramatic than 5 and a half years
(Plus Caesar says he missed five years in Mixed Signals even though the Nanite Event was five years prior to The Day That Everything Changed, which means characters are doing a lot of rounding)
A Family Holiday would be Beverly's 18th birthday
This isn't referenced in the above image but I put Holiday at 33 and Six at 35 (start of series). Noah calling her 28 doesn't make her actually 28, he is a 16 year old boy he doesn't know how old women are
Holiday and Six got in less than a month of dating before Six Minus Six lol
And Six got about 2-3 weeks to get to know Rex before Lions and Lambs
Uhhh hmm. Anything else? Sorry I typed this all once and lost it all so I'm trying to remember what else I had.
OH YES a pre-Providence Rex timeline with a focus on his amnesia blackouts. Here we go:
Late 2004/Early 2005: Rex has an accident in Abysus. His family infuses him with nanites to help save his life. Rex has his first mini-blackout (not full amnesia, but he starts to have trouble remembering bits and pieces) due to the accident or the nanites it's hard to say. While his body adjusts to the nanites, he has a bunch of mini-blackouts and starts forgetting important things. He starts keeping a digital notebook around Feb/March 2005
April 2005: Nanite Event - Rex blacks out due to the shockwave/trauma/both. He turns into the Giant Robot EVO Thing and flies out of Europe. Heads in a random direction and ends up tired and without memory in Hong Kong. He still has his digital notebook and it's kind of the only thing that keeps him sane
Mid 2005 - Mid 2008: Rex in Hong Kong. He starts working for Quarry because he needs to make money/get food somehow. He also meets the Hong Kong Gang one-by-one and they become good friends, though Rex is secretive and anxious and paranoid. Incident with Scarecrow doesn't help.
Mid 2008: Rex knows he has family in Mexico thanks to an early entry in his digital notebook and decides he wants to find them. Quarry agrees to help Rex get to Mexico if he makes a deal with him. Rex hasn't blacked out in so long and is feeling confident about finding his family (Quarry told him he had a contact in Mexico City who would help Rex out) so he doesn't think he needs the notebook anymore. Quarry keeps it as collateral.
Nov 2008: Rex gets to Mexico but he is lost and scared and Quarry lied about having anyone there to help him out. Rex has another blackout (combination of stress and guilt) and turns into the Giant Robot EVO Thing again. Six finds him and brings him to Providence.
Aug 2009: Rex has another blackout while training with Six (something similar to what happened in Frostbite). Holiday and Six don't realize this is a Thing with him so they just start over from the beginning. Training is easier and faster now that they know how Rex's powers work and they're prepared for everything. Six gets Rex some goggles, Holiday gets Rex some gloves.
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olivieraa · 4 months
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my main gripe, and has always been my biggest problem with SnK since the day I first watched it 10 years ago, is that it has a pacing issue
I don't understand how a show can be both fast paced and slow paced at the same time, but no matter how many times I've watched it (seen s1 4 times, s2 once (now twice)), I feel the same every time
there's a lot of dragged out dialogue
and I mean draaaaaaaaaaaged out
I've had this problem with a few animes in the past as well, mainly YGO. YGO went on for 4 years I think? but what happens in the show is done in the span of a year, possibly only a few months. literally all of Battle City, Noah's arc, and the duel tower take place in about 3 days. That's around 100 eps = 3 days (I'll have to check to get the accuracy here but I'm either exactly right or not far off). but 100 eps, from different seasons, that was probably done over a 2 year span when it was released.
so while watching a show, and it takes 2 years for these two seasons to come out, your mind doesn't register that those 2 years irl are 2-4 days in the show.
and I know its the dub, which cant be credited, but one character even mentions how its been 4 years (I THINK someone says it to Yami in the airport, it may have been Anzu, I skip that ep a lot bc of its woeful animation)
SnK is a little different. its similar in the sense that a good chunk of eps are just one day in that world, but then they also do a lot of flashbacks to show that there was a lot of behind the scenes development we didn't see, shit like that. so its a lot better.
but its still dragged out. everyone's inner monologue takes up half an ep. the constant planning takes so long, only for them to not actually do that plan bc something interrupted the plan so its now a new plan.
Eren's basement was mentioned mid-way through season 1. barely ever brought up again. and I know it then took fucking 4 years to bring out s2 (where I dont even know if it was mentioned at all), and I've no idea what happens s3 wise.
my past memory of SnK manga from 10 years ago was Armin getting kidnapped cause they think he's Historia. that or the part where Levi picks her up. that's where my knowledge of SnK ends. I have not seen that animated. I'm assuming it'll be in s3.
I remember the whole "WHAT'S IN THE DAMN BASEMENT???" shit going around. and its very frustrating, bc the storyline makes you think they forgot, and just kept making new plans and prioritising everything else over getting this one damn answer, and that months and months to maybe even a year have passed by without nobody mentioning the basement again or making any plans to get to it.
but in actuality, the majority of these eps prob take place in about a week, maybe 2. and that it actually hasn't been THAT long since Eren mentioned the basement. but its made so unclear, that it feels dragged out to fuck, which is what caused such fandom frustration.
for all I know, season 3 is aaaaaaaaaall about getting to that damn basement. but still, it is frustrating when your mind is going, "these damn people are constantly on the hunt for answers and yet there's no adamancy to get the basement which may have all the answers???"
ANYWAYS
finally onto a season that'll be completely new to me (minus whatever I saw in the manga before I'd caught up to it 10 years ago)
I'll start tagging it now lol
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raindoor · 5 hours
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The story of every personal programming project of my life
I was working on a personal programming project when I realized that I will need to store some data in the database. I was trying hard to avoid that. When your application has to interact with other systems, such as a database, that's where things start to break, and that's where the application becomes far less portable. To migrate it to a different platform -- which becomes inevitable at some point -- you will need to export and import data into another database, and that can be tricky even if you continue to use the same type of database. If you decide to switch to a different one, that's a whole 'nother ball of yarn.
It is with those thoughts that I decided to get into NoSQL databases for real (yes, I just awoke from 10-year-long cryonic sleep, why do you ask?) and learn DynamoDB. The way I use data in my application lends itself well to the NoSQL paradigm, since the data is not heavily relational. Also, DynamoDB is forever free in the AWS free tier. Also, DynamoDB is a prominent topic in the AWS Certified Developer exam, and I might as well learn its ins and outs, because I need to get this certification one day. So I would kill two birds with one stone - learn an in-demand technology and make progress on my personal project.
So I scoured the internet for examples and explanations how to get DynamoDB to run locally on my machine, and how to access it programmatically via C#, my language of choice. While NoSQL concepts were not entirely unfamiliar to me, there were enough gotchas that I had to google and experiment a lot, and go down many rabbit holes. It was a slow slog for a while. As with any personal project, I can only work on in the evenings and weekends, after my work-work, parenting and housework is done. Which means working on it when you are nodding off at your keyboard. "Faceplanting" would be more accurate.
But this time it was even worse. At around that time as I got started with DynamoDB, something got knocked loose in my head (metaphorically speaking), and my fiction writing kicked into a hypomanic state. Which is to say, suddenly fiction writing became appealing, and not a hard slog that it's always been. So I was spending those weekends and evenings writing a lot more than I typically did. My interest in programming shrank. I still made effort to tinker with DynamoDB, but I found myself making excuses to write instead, and wondered if aliens replaced my brain with that of a pod-person.
After a couple of months of this sporadic, half-hearted tinkering, I nevertheless managed to resolve my problems, and understood how to work with DynamoDB. I also realized that I still love programming. I was now ready to incorporate DynamoDB into my program.
And then I realized that I had no idea anymore what I wanted to use it for. What kind of data I wanted to store there? Who knows? I didn't write it down, because I thought I would remember.
Since then I've been retracing my steps and now I'm almost back to remembering what I was planning to do with it. I wish this was a unique occurrence, but this is really the story of every personal programming project of my life. (Minus the obsession-with-writing part -- that was new. I wouldn't mind if it happened more often.)
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the-crustoadian · 3 months
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Alright time for a depressing rant that I feel I need to type out to feel better
I'm fucked. I can't find a job and I have negative money in my bank account. Rent is nearly 900 dollars. I have two bills still needing to be paid. There's barely any food in the house. If I can't get a job or find some money somehow, then what? My parents will let me stay with them, but that's not in the city I live in. It's in a rural town away from all of my friends and all opportunities to go out and have fun or do anything. There's less jobs out there. If that happens I've fucked over my best friend and roommate, who can't afford this pace all on her own, and I don't know what might happen with her if I leave. Oh, and I'd have to abandon my cat, which makes me feel like a literal monster, because my Dad is allergic to cats and not very healthy. A cat in the house could actually kill him, so I don't want to do that either. So what can I do? Just go back to my parents and... Do nothing until I die? I always think about trying to stream, but I don't even have a computer. I doubt I could gain an audience by just streaming from the twitch app on my Xbox and using my mic to talk. I also just... Don't think I actually like streaming. Or anything I "want" to do for a career. Streaming. Drag. Singing. There's a few things I "love" and "wish I could be doing" but the thought of actually doing them... I don't think I'd enjoy it. Streaming for months on end with no viewers. Trying to do drag with no make-up skills, no fashion sense, and no idea on how to move my body. Everyone says I have a nice voice but, honestly, so what? I love to sing but I'd never be a good artist. I can't write songs, I have no actually knowledge of making music like my sister does, and she's barely getting anything from being in a band. Nothing seems to be worth it. None of my "passions" seem like they should be pursued, because what's the fucking point? I'm never going to succeed in them. Not fat fuck me from fucking nowhere, knows no one, no fucking drive to do anything. I'm just so tired of this struggle. I've been "lucky" that I could stay in the city for this long while unemployed, but that's only because my fucking grandmother died and I got my portion of the inheritance. But I miss her so fucking much. It's not fucking fair, none of this is fucking fair. The way the world is, the way I am, the way I'm going to ruin my best friends life because I'm a fucking failure at everything. And my cat. My fucking cat. I don't want to live without him, I can't fucking abandon him like this, he's already been abandoned by those he's loved before. I'm fucking cruel for putting him through this again. And also passing the burden to someone else. Probably my best friend. "Hey I know you're minus half of rent but could you also cover the expenses for my cat now? Thanks." Fuck. God I'm so bad with money too. This is mostly my fault for being in this position. I'm so so so so so fucking bad with money. It all goes away on fucking Uber eats or door dash and fucking weed. And the occasional video game. I don't know when to fucking stop. And now that everything is so fucking expensive it goes even quicker. Ten years in this city is all I'll get I guess. Ten years that were filled with mostly me crying about how stressful living is. Some fun, some good times and memories, but... It's been nothin but shit for a long time. And it won't get better. I'm fucked. I wish I had the balls to kill myself.
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hyunsuks-beanie · 3 years
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Magenta Lilacs
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Han Jisung x reader; non idol AU; 1.5k words; super fluffy, mild crack
A/N: I've written a couple of rather angsty scenarios recently, and I figured I need a more fluff something now. And who better for a fluff than our quokka?
"How do I look?," you ask your best friend Seungmin as he helps you get dressed for your date with your crush, Han Jisung, later that evening.
You and Jisung have crushing on each other for almost a year now, and while it was painfully obvious to every single one of your friends, you two remained blissfully oblivious to the other's feelings. That is until Felix, your classmate and Jisung's best friend, locked you two in a broom closet, refusing to let you out until you kissed. The kiss was... memorable to say the least, being equal parts awkward and sweet. When Felix finally did let you out, Jisung shyly asked you out on a date. Nothing too fancy, just some coffee at the campus cafe. You guys have been hanging out frequently since that day, and today would be your fourth date. You're going to the yearly carnival, and you can't help but feel fireworks going off in your stomach at the thought of finally confessing your true feelings to Jisung, something that Seungmin has dared you to do tonight.
"If you're gonna go on your date looking like that, I'm afraid you won't be able to confess tonight, babe." You whip around at that, confused. "Because Hanji is gonna pass out as soon as he sees you," he smiles, before setting your hair properly. You shove him playfully, before saying, "I'm nervous, Minnie. What if he's not ready yet? What if the dates are just casual outings for him? What if I mess everything up?" "Hey hey hey," he says, grabbing your shoulder. "Take a deep breath. You're gonna be okay, and trust me. He's just as serious about these dates as you are. He'll be your boyfriend before midnight strikes tonight. And on that note, don't you dare stay out after midnight, young lady," your best friend says suddenly, with mock strictness, making you shake your head at his antics.
As if on cue, your doorbell rings, telling you that Jisung has arrived to pick you up. You hug Seungmin goodbye, and open the door, revealing Jisung standing there, looking gorgeous in a denim jacket with a plain white T-shirt. You catch yourself staring at him, and, once you step out of your trance, you notice that he's doing the same. You smile and snap your finger in front of him, making him scratch his neck in embarrassment. "You look really nice today, Ji," you smile. He replies, "You look very cute too, Y/N," making you blush. "Ready to go?," he asks. "Lead the way!," you say. You walk to the festival in comfortable silence, occasionally talking about random stuff. After a while, you notice that he slips his hand into yours, making you stop short. He stops too, and starts removing his hand from yours. You grip his hand tighter, while softly saying, "They fit together really well." He smiles at this, and you continue walking. Once there, you both drag each other towards different stalls that pique your interest. You bring him along to a shooting game, winning him a teddy bear. Jisung then brings you along to a flower shop, telling you about their meanings. "These magenta lilacs are my personal favourite," he tells you. "What do they mean?," you ask. "Love and passion," he says shyly. You bite your lip, just as the shop owner says, "Go on, buy them. These flowers are all the rage among young lovers these days, and you two sure make a cute pair." You both start blushing, before Jisung silently thanks the shop owner and buys a bouquet of the flowers. "Thank you, I really love them," you say. The two of you visit many other stalls. Laughing at the house of mirrors, sharing a single candyfloss, having a competition to see who can eat a plate of dumplings the fastest, you guy lose track of time, and soon enough, it's a quarter to twelve. "Let's go to the ferris wheel," you suggest, thinking back on the plan Seungmin had been feeding into your brain for the past two days. "That's funny, because I was just going to suggest the same thing," smiles Jisung. Unbeknownst to you, Felix had set him up to the exact same task that Seungmin had assigned you, with the both of them hoping that even if one of you chickens out, the other will end up confessing. With that, you get in line, and by the time it's five minutes to midnight, it's your turn to board the ride. You feel your hands shaking, but thankfully from nervousness for what's to come, but thankfully, Jisung takes your hand into his at exactly that moment, helping you relax. "What's the worse that could happen, right?," you mentally ask yourself. Your brain replies, "Oh nothing much, he could just reject you, giving you the most awkward five minutes of your life. Or, the ride could suddenly break down, killing you all." You scrunch your nose at the pessimistic thoughts, but don't have much time to ponder over them, as your ride starts. Two minutes to twelve, and you two are just sitting there in silence. This is the first time during the date that the silence has felt awkward, and it doesn't do much to ease your nerves. Once your watch strikes twelve, you turn to look at Jisung, only to find him already looking at you. "Ji, I have something-" "Y/N, I wanted to tell you-," you both start at the same time, causing the both of you to giggle. "You first," he says. "Okay, so here goes," you start, closing your eyes. "We've been on quite a few dates now, and I've really enjoyed the past month and a half of spending time with you. You're so smart, cool, funny, witty, sweet, soft, and every other good adjective, with just the right amount of loudness. I love hanging out with you, and spending time with you. Being with you makes me feel giddy inside, and I think I know what this feeling is," you open your eyes right before your big confession, but instead of your next line, you end up saying, "What?," with a confused expression. "What?," Jisung asks, tilting his head. "You're looking at me funny," you say, causing him to laugh nervously. "Oh, uhm, yeah, because I kind of, know
what you're gonna say next," he says, rubbing his neck. "You do? How?," you ask, with an even more confused expression. "Because I've been practicing the exact same lines for the past two days, minus the adjectives, of course. Because I had a different set of those ready," he says, shy all of a sudden. "Look, let me come clean," he continues, "I like you, a hell lot. And I've been trying to confess to you, so Felix created a plan for me to tell you how I feel, today at midnight. I was going to say the exact same things you said just now, and finish with a super smooth, 'A new day is just starting, so how about we make this the start of a new relationship for us, as well?,' but I guess you beat me to it." By the time he's done, you are staring at him with your mouth agape. "I was going to say the exact same thing too!! And it was Seungmin who suggested this to me," you exclaim. Just then, you both realize that your turn at the ferris wheel is over, and you get off the ride. After walking a few feet, Jisung stops you. "So, if you were going to say the same things, then does that mean you like me too?," he asks nervously. "Of course Hanji, is that even a question?," you giggle. "So what does that mean for us?," he asks with a smile. You give him a small hug, before whispering in his ear, "I guess I'm gonna start calling you my 'boyfriend' now." "I'd like that," he says, hugging you back, before taking your hand again. "In all honesty though, Seungmin and Felix are dead meat," you laugh, with him joining in.
Once the two of you stop laughing, you realize how close your faces are. You stare at him, eyes flicking from his eyes to his lips and back. This doesn't escape his notice, and he softly asks you, "Is it okay if I kiss you?," you simply nod, pressing your lips to his in a kiss that is equal parts soft and sweet. It is just like you had imagined. Your lips molded perfectly together, and he tasted like the candyfloss you had eaten earlier. You smile into the kiss, which makes his shoulders, that he didn't know were tense, relax. When you finally break away, he pulls you in for another hug, kissing your forehead softly.
"Should they be dead meet though? I feel like we should be thanking them for daring us to confess, or else I don't know how many more dates it would have taken. Although I admit, the dialog they came up with was way too cheesy," Jisung says. To this, you reply by snuggling into his chest even more. "Might as well be the reason why they don't have partners yet. But we'll think about them tomorrow. For now, you're all that's on my mind."
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meimae · 3 years
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Language Learning Through Immersion: One Year Japanese Update
11/03/2021
I did it, you guys! I’ve successfully reached my very first year of Japanese language immersion! I honestly thought that I would have given up by now, but this really has been a fun and ultimately rewarding endeavor.
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Studying the language has been at the back of my mind for years since elementary school, I just never really knew how to go about it before, and I always thought that I could learn it in a classroom setting someday. That someday for me was in two elective courses in university, and while those were fun as well, it did not give me the same gains that I have achieved in this past year.
It’s probably easier to quantify learning a language in a classroom setting, especially when going through a program to earn a language degree. Learning through immersion, however, I had to really consider what my goals should be on my own. Eventually, I stumbled upon an article saying that for an English speaker, Japanese was exceptionally difficult to learn and that at least 2,200 hours must be spent with the language to reach a certain level of proficiency. So I said to myself, “well okay internet, if you say so!”, and set that as my long term goal going forward.
Spoiler Alert: I did not hit that goal in my first year. I am not crazy and will never listen to Japanese in my sleep regardless of what Khatzumoto (the creator of All Japanese All the Time) says. 
I did, however, hit a total 1,226.65 active immersion hours in my first year, so I guess I’m still a bit nuts. That is 874.96 hours of active listening and 351.69 reading hours. I also did 270.59 hours of passive listening, also known as the time in the very beginning of my immersion where I was using Japanese subtitles (therefore not really concentrating on listening alone). That’s a cumulative 1,497.24 hours spent with Japanese. That’s more than halfway towards my goal! 
To further break that down for curious animanga fans out there, that’s 973 episodes from 109 anime, 765 episodes from 33 dramas, 7 movies, and 967 chapters from 107 volumes of manga (21 series). Here’s my anilist and mydramalist to see what I’ve read/watched.
During all this, I was also doing my daily Anki reps and now I have a 530 day SRS streak (includes the time prior starting immersion and only doing RTK and some vocabulary cards) and a total 8,857 sentence cards. I’ve been averaging 406 cards daily (because I’m trying to cure my leeches) and I spend about an hour per day doing reps and learning new cards. I don’t really track my time on Anki, but I do have a set timer that goes off after 1-1:30 hours.
What I haven’t touched upon at all is output. I have not gone out of my way to find a tutor or a language partner. There’s still plenty of input out there to immerse in before I even consider outputting.
Graphs, stats, and more thoughts:
Here's my current card count in my main deck (minus the cards in my new/learning queue and leeches I've been relearning which are in separate decks):
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That one day in 2019 where I did not do my cards because I was seriously doubting whether I can actually stick with language learning this time around will forever haunt and inspire me to keep going everyday.
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Workflow and Tips
You might be wondering, how do I have a lot of time? I started this whole endeavor in the middle of a pandemic, which eliminated the option of me going to a language school, and a slew of other things I were considering doing last year became impossible (and if anything, very scary to do in a pandemic). All I can say is that, things work out eventually if it is His will, and if I can learn a skill before everything properly settles back down again, then why not? 
I wake up at 5 in the morning everyday to either do my Anki reps or read until the time when I need to get up and I listen to compressed audio throughout the day. The biggest tip is to switch the time you spend watching/reading in your native language to your target language instead. Listen to a podcast during your commute, watch an episode during lunch break, read before going to bed, do your Anki reps in the bathroom if you have to. 
But, if you’re feeling burnt out, there is no reason for you to not take a break! I have been watching a lot of Among Us streams before bed, and I chat with my friends from time to time. Language learning is not a race.
More Stats
Here are a couple of grids of the kanji characters that I have encountered at least once in my immersion and how well I have answered them in my vocabulary/sentence cards.
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It's interesting that after almost 9000 words, I have yet to encounter every single character from the Remembering the Kanji 1 (RTK 1) book by James Heisig, which teaches you the most common use characters that are part of the 常用漢字. Which brings me to the question, was writing down every single character being taught in RTK worth it every time it came up in my reviews for the first 3-ish months I was reviewing them? Maybe, maybe not. It certainly removed my anxiety whenever looking at blocks of text in Japanese, but the longer I think about it, the more I feel I should have switched to Recognition RTK earlier. Still, being able to write in proper stroke order is cool I guess, and it also helps me when looking things up in the dictionary.
Here’s the same grid but in JLPT order:
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I clearly need to grind those N2 and N1 level cards! Speaking of which, I have apparently almost covered every single character that could possibly appear in the JLPT (except for the N1 which I have only covered half of) in just a year's time. If the JLPT word frequency lists I’m using are accurate, I have about 2,000 words more to go to to cover most vocabulary that could appear in the test. This makes the "10,000 sentences/words to fluency" argument a reasonable milestone to aim for for Japanese learners if said aim is only to pass the test. That said, 10,000 words is just that, a milestone. It's more akin to a comfortable level of comprehension, but not my own concept of fluency which is being able to read with ease, speak articulately, and write comfortably.
READING IMMERSION GRAPHS
My biggest motivation for tracking my stats is for the purpose of seeing whether my reading speed is improving over time. Reading speed is also easier to measure than listening comprehension which is kind of subjective, so I had a lot of fun making these. What I found is that for the first volume or chapter of whatever it is I’m reading, I always take the time to get used to the writing style of the author. My speed really improves whenever I keep reading the same topic over and over again. On the other hand and quite obviously, looking up many new words in a row and trying to parse sentences slows me down.
Manga: Reading Speed Progression per Volume
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I clearly love ちはやふる and I am not ashamed to admit it.
I need to start reading longer manga. When I do, I’ll probably split this graph into less than and greater than 20 volumes. Imagine if I start reading something ridiculously long as 名探偵コナン or ワンピース, these graphs will start breaching the bounds of time and space.
Novels: Time Spent Reading per Chapter
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#neverforget the time I read chapter six of Norwegian Wood for 9 hours when it took me less than half that time in English RIP. Also, my interest in Kitchen plummeted LOL. Still planning to finish it don’t worry. 
I also need to start branching away from manga and start reading more novels and light novels, too just so I can make more pretty graphs.
Visual Novels: Time Spent Reading and Daily Word Count
Also known as images that clearly show that I’ve already spent several days only reading the prologue of Island. I’m not sweating. 切那 needs to stop using words I don’t know in succession. More thoughts on this VN far into the future.
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Thoughts on Immersion
I can’t really say anything else other that that it works for me, and needless to say if you’re considering this method, remember that the SRS is your friend but immersion should be your one true love.
Prior to all this, I couldn’t even read a sample paragraph from Genki without being confused to my very soul. Yes, I know, it’s embarrassing, but that’s the truth. I was way more scared of failing my Japanese classes than my actual thesis for my bachelors degree, I kid you not. I would quite literally spend all my free time in university trying to understand grammar, memorize vocabulary, and answer my workbook exercises with little to no success. 
I tried so hard to get all the grammar “formulas” into my head for 1.5 years and it only brought me more confusion. I’m never going back to traditional classroom study for language learning, but I will still refer to grammar books when I need to, and not because I feel like I need to answer 4783342 different workbook exercises like my life depended on it.
I still can’t believe it, but with immersion this statement is actually true to a point, don’t try shadowing anime/or calling your boss anime language slurs, use your common sense:
study anime to understand Japanese > study Japanese to understand anime 
Future Goals/Plans
2,200 immersion hours was my initial goal, but honestly I feel like that number could be much higher. There’s still a lot of stuff I don’t understand (news, politics, sciences, etc.), so I’ll make attempts to cover more of those things in my immersion. 
I’ll continue reading more, because that’s a natural SRS in itself. Try to read longer manga, more novels, visual novels, and light novels, and maybe news articles. 
I’ll try to mine as much “JLPT vocab” as I can before making any attempts at taking the JLPT. I noticed that a lot of the words I know don’t appear in the JLPT word lists as much, even though they appear a lot in media/daily conversation. 
Continue mining all words I don’t know because all words are useful anyway. There is no such thing as useless words. I never really understood mining only “interesting words” or words that “pop up” in your immersion. As I said in my previous blog post, 美人局 is an interesting word and I certainly caught it being said in my immersion, but in the three languages I know, I wouldn’t know when I would be able to use such a word, as compared to something like ジャガイモ which is a significantly less interesting word, but is certainly useful to know. 
_
I have managed to talk up a storm, but if you have any questions regarding my process or recommendations for new immersion material, please feel free to send an ask/reply to this post. I love hearing about other people’s language learning/immersion journeys. 
See you on my next post!
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Secret Voight (Jay Halstead) S2 Part 1
Summary: The team finally knows that Y/N is Voight's daughter. One secret is out but theres still one secret that's not out. Y/N and Jay's relationship. Will that stay a secret or not? I mean Voight always finds out about things, right? Season two of Secret Voight starts now.
Words: 3179
Requested: yes
Prompts:
Warning or A/N: I'm so sorry it took so long! Been busy with work. But I'm working on part 2 as I'm posting this!
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I stood there with my arms crossed looking at my half brother, unimpressed. The only thing that has changed about him from the last time I saw him was his height. "Y/N! Come on!"
    You looked away from him, trying to figure out what to say before you looked back at him. "Come on, nothing. I'm not feeding into your habit,"
    Justin looked at you as if you had slapped him. "Fine, whatever. You had never helped me and didn't care about me. You only cared about impressing dad and that why you got applied to be on Intelligence,"
     You just sat there looking at him like he was the dumbest person on the planet. "Justin, you can try to guilt me all you want but I'm not gonna change my mind,"
     He huffs and walked away but stop midway to whoever's car was parked behind him. "You know, you're just like dad,"
    Your dad may do some shady things but he is loyal. You rolled your eyes and walked to your car and got into it and screamed out in frustration. When you met Justin, he was alread to lost and you were never clicked with him as you were 'too much' like your father. Him and Voight didn't have a great relationship. You tried to help him over and over, gave him hundreds of dollars but he would blow them on stupid things and you had enough of it. You didn't know what he wanted this time but the way he looked and acted it wasnt anything good. You sighed and drove to 21st.
     You walked into Intelligence and you saw Jay start to walk up to you, which you walked past him and to your father's office. His door was open, so you just walked into his office but shut the door. "You need to do something with Justin before he gets killed,"
     Your father swirls around looked at you. "Not even a good morning?"
     You rolled your eyes. "Good morning. You need to do something with Justin befoe he gets killed,"
     Voight puts his hands together and just  looked at you. You rolled your eyes. "He called me last night after. Did you know he got out early?"
     Voight shook his head. "No. What did he want and when did he get out?"
    "Like a month ago, he asked to meet up. The when we did asked me for money and dad, he doesn't look good,"
      Voight just nodded and sighed. "Theres nothing anyone can do. I've tried. You've tried. Everyone has tried. Jail obviously didn't do anything,"
    You were about to say something but Voight stopped you. "Dont worry about him. We got a case,"
   You sighed in defeat, he walked to the door and opened it for you. You just looked at him for a minute before walking out and over to your desk. Voight walked to the middle of the room. "All right, there are two unrelated wire investigations. Surveillance followed three of area central's top-ranking gang targets to this house on Carpenter. Narcotics hasn't gotten anywhere with it, so command staff wants Intelligence on it. Roll out in five,"
    Voight took a look around the room before coming downstairs. You grabbed your gun and badge from your desk and started to walk downstairs when Jay walked next to you. "Everything go okay with Justin?"
    You didn't answer him and kept walking. Jay whistled. "I take that as a no,"
    "You have that right,"
   You got into Jay's passenger seat as he climbed into the driver's seat. You looked around to see if anyone was near the truck and no one was there. You leaned over to Jay and turned his head to face you and kissed him. He smiled within the kiss and placed his hand on your cheek. You pulled away after a fee seconds and looked at him. "Sorry, just wedded that,"
     Jay shook his head and chuckled. "No need to apologize babe. It's always welcomed,"
    You smiled as Jay turned on his truck.
    ----
    You put the walkie up to your mouth and called the team. "We got the main eye," 
    Voight came through next. "We're set up to the north. We got the south and a partial of the alley. If anyone goes mobile from the house, we're in position for a take-away. Oh and Ruzek, move closer. See if there's any movement in the house,"
     At the same time I saw a someone walk up, Jay did too and he called it in. "Hold up. We got company,"
    The guy started to pull something out and you noticed it was a gun before you could call it in, Atwater called it in. "Gun!"
    We quickly got of the car and as soon as he did we were under attack. I don't know how lmany there were or how long it took, all I know was it was silent as it the gunfire crease. We walked into the house and started to clear the house. "Clear!"
    You and Jay walked into the last room. "Police! Clear!"
    You saw someone dead on the floor and other one that was alive. You took notice of the rest of the team coming in minus Ruzek and Atwater. "Hoodie's dead. This one's alive,"
     You looked at Jay as you put the walkie to your lips once again. "Charlie 50-21, emergency,"
    Voight looked at you like you were crazy. "What? He's gonna bleed out. We gotta put pressure on the wound,"
     You pressed your finger back down on the walkie. "Shots fired by the police. Offender down,"
      You heard Atwater call you guys into a room and when you got in there, you see specialize specialized ammunition "Cop killers,"
     Ruzek stood up and was looking at something. "Hey, look at this,"
    You walked over to him. "What do you got?"
      "Insulin,"
     "Somebody was a diabetic?"
     "Or not. Is there a black market for this stuff?"
     Jay walked up to us and grabbed the Insulin. "None that I've heard of. But you know what? It's a good place to hide a bullet, though. Nice work,"
    -----
    You walked up to the board and tapped two pictures on it and then turned to face the team. "This is Edward Jelko, the deceased street-level dealer. This is Peter Thomas Banfill, the offender, currently baking in a coma over at County. Jelko probably thought like we did that Banfill was sitting on something big, went over there to rip him off,"
     Antonio walked up to the board and pinned more pictures on the board. "These are M995s, teflon-tipped, kevlar-penetrating rounds. Ballistics has them linked to several recent homicides. And we found 100 of these at the scene. It's for type R insulin, which is a Canadian designation and with any luck, our little surprise visit got the gun runners scrambling, which means they're gonna make mistakes, okay?"
     Voight nodded and looked at all us. "Eyes open,"
   ---
   You were typing on your computer, corssrefercing things when Antonio comes back in after going out and talking to his C.I. "Hey! I found the source of the Insulin. A company near Toronto named Markham Medical Supply their sales rep makes a run here every other Thursday. He left at 5:00 this morning,"
     You stood up from your chair and walked over to Antonio. "I'm guessing they have tracking numbers on all their products?"
     Antonio looked at you. "Yep,"
    Voight walked over to you two and nodded. "All right, get those tracking numbers, locate him on GP, and- you already did that,"
    Antonio smiled. "Yep, Atwater and Burgess are en route tracking the signal,"    
    You held out your fist for Antonio to fist bump it and he does. "Nice,"
    --
   You were walking to the car to where Burgess and Atwater said they found a body. "This is definitely our sales rep. George Wilenko, 41. He's been with Markham Medical for 17 years. No record, fully bonded, has border clearance. This guy's not your typical smuggler,"
     Al pointed at a cup. "You notice the cup?"
    You looked over at the cup and saw a lipstick stain. "Lipstick on the lid,"
    Jay and you had picked up the wife and had her in the break room after telling her, her husband was found dead. "My mother always called it Murder City but the first time we visited, I fell in love with Chicago. The lake, the river walk. George and I went to the top of the Willis tower. God, I just I can't believe it. Why would someone kill my husband?"
    Jay sighed and looked at her. "We think that he was smuggling guns into the country,"
   The wife looked at us like we were beyond mental. "George?"
    You nodded. "He wasn't killed over Insulin. And on his last trip here, we think his vehicle was filled with these,"
    You pointed over at Jay and Jay sat a bullet down on the sink. The wife looked like she was gonna faint. "I'm hallucinating. This isn't happening,"
     "Five people have already been killed by them,"
     The wife wasnt believing anything we said. "Look, you don't get it. George would never do that ever,"
     "How often did you make the trip down with him?"
      "Every couple of months. We always stay at the Sofitel. I shop. That's why he dropped me off. They don't have Bloomingdale's in Canada,"
      You and Jay share a knowing look.
     --
     You and Jay were at Jay's desk, checking out the story that the wife told us wien Antonio comes back into Intellegnce. We got somethin'. These are our bullets. Can you believe the velocity of these things? Forensics traced one round that went through the TV, through the wall, ended up halfway through the engine block of an ice cream truck parked across the street,"
      Voight nodded. "Seven homicides and counting,"
     While you were listening to them, Jay was still digging. Our widow's lying. Her cell phone provider said she was never at Bloomingdale's. She spent the afternoon up in Edgewater,"
          You and Jay walked back into the break room where she was sitting with the door closed. "We're gonna get real honest real quick. Do you recognize these men?"
       Jay laid down the photos of the victim of the cop killer bullets. "Oh, my,"
     You were getting fed up with her. "Yeah, neither can we. His face was shot off by the bullets you and your husband brought into Chicago. You lied to us. You weren't browsing Bloomingdale's. You were in Edgewater. You and your husband had a nice run, right? You start off with something simple like x or kush, and you got greedy, and you upgraded to gun-running. You got George killed, which makes you an accessory to his murder,"
      Jay took a step in front of you at this point. "Y/N,"
     You just looked at him but moved so he wasn't in the way anymore. "So we're gonna try this again, only this time the truth,"
     She sat down andsighed. "I was visiting a friend. - An ex-boyfriend,"
     You rolled your eyes. "If you're gonna lie, put some effort into it for me,"
     The wife gave me the I'm not lying look.   "Call him. He'll tell you,"
     Jay placed a pen and a piece of paper on the table and pointed at it. "Name, number. I want you to take me through your entire day, every stop you made, every person you talked to, everything you did,"
       "I already told you,"
      You out your hands on the table. "Tell me again,"
    She nodded. "We were on the road by 4:30. Didn't stop till we crossed the border just past Ann Arbor. Got some coffee, some gas. Used the washroom. George got a phone call from our nephew-"
     You stopped her there. "Who's the nephew?"
     "He lives here. He likes to meet up with George Oh, God, Mikey doesn't know," 
    You look at her. "Does Mikey have a last name?"
     She nodded.
    *
     Jay walked up to the board and tapped a picture up as you pointed at it. "Michael Ganz, lives in East Garfield Park, has a record: robbery, possession. Runs with a small crew,"
     Jay nodded. "Claire's ex-boyfriend checks out right down to the five hundred bucks,"
     The tech analysts came in and stands in the middle of the room. "Got a ping on Ganz's phone, pulled all the numbers he's called in the last 24 hours. All the calls were to the same numbers, a cell phone registered to a Lucky M Pawn and Loan - in Gage Park,"
     Al pointed at the tech person. "Lucky M. I know that ding-dong,"  
     Antonio nodded. "We'll go talk to him. Come on,"
     ----
     Jay left to do something in which he didn't tell you what so you left to go and grab a cup of good coffee. You were coming out of the shop when you saw Justin across the street trading money for something. You placed your coffe cup on your car and walk over to where Justin was. Justin didn't see you til the moment you reached over and grabbed what was in his hand. It was drugs. You gave me a dirty looked before crushing them into dust and throwing them into the dumpster next to you. "Y/N! What the hell?"
      You didnt even acknowledged him and started to walk away but he grabbed your arm. You instantly reached over with your free hand and punched him in the face. "Don't ever grab me like that,"
      Justin recovers fast as he walked up to you. "Dont throw away something that isn't yours,"
     You resisted the urge to strike him again. "Is that why you wanted to borrow money? To buy drugs?"
    Justin didn't answer you. You pursed your lips together. "Thought so. You just got out of jail, Justin. Do you want to go back?"
     Justin looked at you quickly. "Are you gonna arrest me?"
    You shook your head. "With what evidence? I just destroy it. So no, I'm not but the next thing I see you buying or using any type of illegal substances, I will. Now get out of here,"
    Justin takes one last look at you before walking away. You sighed as your phone started to ring. You reached into your pocket and answered it. "Voight,"
    ----
    You, Burgess, Atwatter, Voight, the IT person were sitting in the surveillance van after Al got into a car with the suspect. He was calling out directions when his phone got tossed out the window. It was a few minutes after his phone got tossed when they finally stopped. Now we are just waiting for the takedown word. "It's just like Christmas morning,"
     That was it, you all jump out of the car and move into the bulding. "Police!"
     You and Jay walked around the bulding as you see two people hiding southwest, you called it out to Burgess and Atwater.
    ---
    You sighed as you finished up the paperwork from the case and placed it in a file on your desk. Jay had already left and so did the rest of the team besides Voight. You get up from your desk and grabbed your jacket. You walked over to Voight's office and knocked. Voight turned and looked at you. "I'm headed home,"
     Voight nodded. "Okay, I'll see you tomorrow. I love you,"
    You nodded and said I love you too.
   ---
    You walked up to the door and knocked. It was a few seconds befor you heard feet shuffle to the door, you smiled as your grandmother opened the door. "Its late. Everything okay?"
    You nodded. "Yeah, I just wanted to come over and I know it's late but I missed you,"
     Your grandmother pulled you into the house and then into a hug. She led you into her kitchen where you sat in a chair at the table. She walked over to the coffee pot and turned it on. "How's your father?"
     You shrugged. "Same as ever. Jobs going good as well,"
     You two didnt say anything else until the coffee was done. She grabbed the pot and a cup. She poured some of the coffee into the cup and sat down. "Are you gonna tell me what's bothering you or am I gonna have to guess?"
    You sighed and took a sip of your coffee. "Justin is out of jail,"
    She gives you a look, you give her the same one back. "Yeah, I know. Early release. Today, I caught him buying drugs and instead of arresting him. I destroyed the drug and gave him a choice. I know what I was wrong but he's my half brother. I cant let him drown,"
      She sits her coffee down on the table and looked at me. "You have a big heart but sometime you gotta let people fall,"
     "Its hard grandma,"
    "I know but in the long run itll be better for everyone,"
    ---
    You wake up to your phone going off, you groaned and rolled over and you saw that it was a text from Justin.
    From: Justin
    Thanks for not ratting me out. Dad set up a dinner, you're coming.
     You sighed and texted him back.
     To: Justin
     What if I have plans?"
     From: Justin
     Cancel them.
    **
     You looked at Justin and then at Voight at the table and sighed. You didnt want to be here, you rather be laying in bed wrapped up in Jay's arms. "So this guy comes across the yard. He's all skeezed out on crystal or something and he says, he says, chicken pot pie. Like I'm supposed to know what that is, right? So my boy looks at him, points back at the block and he says, that way. Did not matter what this cat was on. He just doubles back to where he came from lickety-split, you know what I'm saying?"
    You pursed your lips together as Voight looked at his son. "Hey, J, listen, I got some news. Um I had to pull some strings, but I got you in at the CTA,"
     "That's where that's where city workers send their loser relatives,"
      Justin looked at you for help but you shrugged. "It's a job. And it'll help you get back on your feet,"
     He gives you a look which you ignored. "You know you sound more and more like him every day, right?"
    You rolled your eyes. "You start Monday,"
    "Okay, pop, sure,"
    Voight's phone started to ring and he gets up to take it. "Excuse me, I gotta take this,"
     You and Justin didn't talk while he was gone.  He comes back and placed money on the table for the check and looked at you. "We gotta roll,"
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marshmallowatheart · 6 years
Text
To All The Boys I've Loved Before (Part 17)
(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) (11) (12) (13) (14) (15) (16)
Dear Veronica
I had a lot of fun at the zoo, we should go again sometime. Maybe we'll get a chance to see the pandas?
- L
P.S I thoroughly enjoyed your leaning tower of chocolate cake.
Veronica chuckles at the note, remembering how thoroughly he had enjoyed it. She makes a mental note that chocolate goodies are kryptonite against Logan Echolls.
She wonders what other foods he likes. Does he like lasagne as much as she does? She remembers that he's allergic to shellfish, was there anything else he was allergic to? She tries pulling out memories that she'd long ago sealed away and she wonders if he still likes honey on his toast.
--vm--
"Look what the cat dragged in, Veronica Mars," Trina smirks, descending down the staircase like she's in a movie and this is the moment everyone's been dying to see.
Veronica gives her a small smile and a head bob. "Hey Trina, how's it going?"
"I thought you were in Australia," Logan says; he would have postponed this dinner if he'd know his sister was back in town. Trina's an unpredictable wild force of nature that would embarrass him without a second thought for her own amusement - he doesn't want to have to deal with that when he has all of these other added pressures in making this dinner go well.
"Yeah, well, I'm back baby bro," she grins, enjoying the fact that he's rattled with her presence. Trina's always had the most fun when people didn't want her to be there. "So I've clearly been out of the loop lately. Are you two together now?"
Logan's hand finds Veronica's and he starts to tug her away to the kitchen or any other room where his sister is not. "Yeah," he answers. "Hey, if you're back home who's playing Dead Hooker number 2 on CSI?"
Trina rolls her eyes and decidingly ignores her brother in favour for the blonde beside him. "Veronica, look at you. All grown up. Hey, we should go shopping sometime now that I'm back in town."
Veronica nods her head, offering the aspiring star a smile. "Sure, Trina."
--vm--
It feels like she's living in a flashback of her life when she settles down at the Echolls' dinning room table. The home decor hasn't changed much - minus all of the Aaron Echolls' blockbuster movie posters that were once plastered along the walls - Lynn Echolls is still the charming hostess she always was (though she does look lighter and more radiant than ever before).
Veronica's happy to see that it's still Mrs Navarro cooking that's filling up the table - she'd always made delicious food that tasted like heaven on a plate.
"Logan tells me you have two sisters," Lynn says, bright smile and pearly white teeth. "Your mother must love having three girls."
"Her mother's not with them anymore, mom," he says, wide-eyed and pointedly, before Veronica can even get a word in.
"Oh, I'm so sorry, Veronica," she amends, bashful and eyes full of sympathy. "I remember now."
"It's okay," Veronica assures her, picking at her food with her fork. "Dad, he loves having three girls," she adds in, trying to de-spell the awkward tension. "But you know I think he secretly wanted one of us to be a boy, someone to play catch with and go fishing," she chuckles, hoping to ease up any of Lynn's concerns. "I don't mind the sports but fishing is way too gruesome."
Lynn chuckles along with her, sensing what the petite blonde is doing and welcomes it. She continues to cut her meat and mentions, "Maybe he can take Logan with him the next time he wants to go fishing."
Trina snorts, loudly and radically. "Logan's so spoiled, he might as well be a girl," she remarks. "Don't let his tough-boy looks fool you, Veronica Mars. Logan won't survive a day without a household staff and take-out."
Logan is already regretting accepting his mother's invitation for dinner.
Veronica humours Trina with an uneasy chuckle and at the same time defends her faux boyfriend. "He did help me bake some cookies once so maybe there's hope for him yet."
Logan gives her a smile and she reciprocates the gesture, feeling her heart swell at the way his eyes seemed to light up.
--vm--
After dinner, Logan pulls Veronica away to the pool house because Trina is wildly inappropriate and his mother gets a call from her agent and reaches for a drink so he knows she's getting bad news.
It fills him with disappointment whenever he sees her fall into old habits but his mother definitely takes bad news better than his father used to. And well at least his mother doesn't drink herself into oblivion anymore.
Logan busies himself behind the counter, getting out drinks and snacks for them and Veronica plops on the counter near him.
He lets out a breath, handing her a soda and says, "Hey, I'm really sorry about what my mom said to you."
Veronica shakes her head. "It's fine. It's nice to know that not everybody has 'drunk mother abandons family' in the back of their mind when they talk to me," she jokes, swaying slightly on his counter.
He nods his head, he gets it, there's always been some headline attached to his name and he basks in moments when he's just Logan - those moments seem so few and far but when he's with Veronica, he feels like he's just him.
"Do you miss her?"
"I miss the person she used to be," Veronica offers softly. "She wasn't always drunk," she says, reminding him and herself. "She used to come to my soccer games, we'd bake cookies and prepare dinner together. Stuff that mothers are supposed to do, you know?"
He nods his head, he has vague memories of her when he'd first moved here; Lianne Mars was nice to him and it was the first time he didn't mind the company of someone else’s mother.
"But those were in between the bad moments," she swallows. Her eyes falling from Logan to her can of soda. "Sometimes she'd miss picking me up from school because she was passed out drunk. Or she'd burn the waffles because she was too dazed out."
She lets out a breath, trying to control her emotions as she shares this part of her with Logan. It's always been hard to talk about it but right now it feels like a bit easier with Logan.
"The months before she left, it got really bad," she meets Logan's eyes and he's attentively listening to her, offering her looks of understanding and silently waiting for her to continue. "Dad got calls to pick her up in the middle of the afternoon or at night," she sighs loudly and shrugs; it's a distant memory but it feels raw and as present as ever. "He tried for years to hide that side from us and then it got to the point where he couldn't anymore."
She bites her lips, she can feel tears caused by long ago memories start to brim in her eyes so she shakes her head and shrugs. Swallowing down her soda, hydrating herself as much as she can. She doesn't want to cry over this woman that's left them anymore. "There's moments I forget who she's turned into and I miss the times when we were happy with her."
"And then I remember that she left us," she comes off the counter, can in hand, searching for the bin and Logan lets her distract herself from her rising emotions. She spots it easily enough and throws it in.
She lets out a breath, looking at Logan and her voice feels hoarse that she wonders if she's at her limit talking about this but she still has these feelings that for some reason wants to let itself out now, to him. "Normal people get divorced when they're unhappy in their marriage but she didn't just leave my dad, she left all of us."
"Even though I was so angry, even though I know how bad things could get with her there, I wanted her back," she admits, it's one of her more vulnerable thoughts that not many people are privy off. "I would have welcomed her back if she came back to us."
She doesn't know how Logan's wiggled himself into being a person that she's comfortable enough to share this with - maybe it's because he's the only person that she's not lying to or maybe because he's been a friend that's allowed her to be vulnerable or maybe because he understands what she's talking about even if their emotions are derived from different situations.
"But she didn't, Logan, she left us, moved to Arizona and has this white picket fence life with a new family," she tells him and he's shook - she can see him registering the new information and she remembers how distraught she was when she'd learnt this.
"A family that she's there for, a family that she's sober for while we're left to think why weren't we enough?" Her voice cracks, she hates to admit that the thought still does creep up at times when she's particularly nostalgic.
"I found out last year," she confesses, a bitter smile gracing her lips. "Perks of spending afternoons at the Sheriff's departments and fiddling around with systems I'm not exactly authorized to," she lets out a humourless chuckle.
"I never told my dad or my sisters." She wouldn't be surprised if her dad knew - if he wanted to know, he'd know. "Just Wallace," she says in a quiet voice and meets his eyes once again. "And now you."
She gives him a half-smile when she says that, a silent thank you for listening. And he returns it, a silent thank you for trusting me.
"My mom drinks," he confesses, walking towards her - she's on the couch, pillow in her lap and looks at him in surprise.
"She doesn't drink as much as she used to - and as far as I can tell there's no more pill popping. But when Aaron was alive, things weren't good at all," he settles beside her sideways, his one leg folded with his arm on the back rest of the couch and his head is resting on his palm.
"He was the worst husband. Even worse father. He liked to portray the perfect family life on screen but we were far from it."
He's not used to this sharing thing. He's not ready to talk about everything that his father has done - he's not sure if he'll ever be - but he thinks if he ever is, Veronica might be the person he'd be able to confide to about it.
"I miss those good moments in between all the bad too," he offers.
He remembers a time - it feels like from another life - but there'd been a time when Aaron had been a father, when he was a kid, years leading up to his tenth birthday.
And then suddenly his father turned into this angry vengeful monster that took his anger out on his son, using anything he could get his hands on - including his hands - to teach Logan a lesson.
She gives him a small half smile, tilts her head and she once again thinks that he has the most beautiful brown soulful eyes she's ever seen.
"Hey, you wanna play Mario Kart before I take you home?"
"Sure, if you're ready to lose," she grins and he laughs.
He relaxes next to her, the game is on and she's being her usual snarky self and he reciprocates in kind. Being with Veronica feels so natural and it feels so good like a relationship should feel. He hopes that she feels it too.
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breakingmllc · 3 years
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Women Veterans Back The Blue I've Got Your Six Colorful T Shirt
Hand In Hand with Strength of Our Economy May Now Action Begets Action over the past Few Months We Learn What Essential Rising to the Challenge Not to Leave Learned Who Is Essential to Just the Wealthiest among Us President Who Fights His Fellow Americans Rather Than Fight the Virus Killing in Our Economy It’s the People Who Put Their Own Health Risk to Care for the Rest of Us Day at MVPs and Nurses and Doctors Utility Workers Truck Drivers and Grocery Clerks Childcare Workers the Parent Teachers and Mail Carriers Autoworkers so Many of These Essential Workers Lost Their Lives to Come Nearly Always and Healthcare Workers by the 170 000 People across America Including Five year old Girl Named Skyler from Detroit Guzman Is a Women Veterans Back The Blue I've Got Your Six Colorful T Shirt Police Officer Is a Firefighter Generation after Generation Nation Has Been Defined by What We Can Learn What We Fail to Do so for Skyler for Her Parents in the Memory of All Those We’ve Lost but His Heel As One Nation Let Us Find Strength to Do the Work Nodding Then Israel Will Remember Every. Me know and I will blame it will on the you know about anyone and invite friends data had a bad evil conflict items asked mashed and maybe a will kind of felt like that will be the can and 80 minus the ditzy to not to headings keep needs using expensive. And that’s important because life testing being done is not as they being done number one of the covert 19 virus number two in saliva or respiratory fluids and thirdly the virus dies the quickest in the presence of direct sunlight under these conditions and when you look better look at the aerosol as you breathe it put it in a room 7075 20 many low humidity last half life is about an hour yet outside cussed down woman and half very significant difference when he gets it with UV rays to present while are many unknown links in the covert 19 transmission chain we believe these trends can support practical decision making to lower the risks associated with the virus if I have my while I
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All things kinematic think he’s gonna make you the vice president by will be doing the lid to a Women Veterans Back The Blue I've Got Your Six Colorful T Shirt media is until Thursday he’s taken for this campaign needs to let you know I you can run indisputable whatever the hell is you could run that the Democrats he got the fake is being used upon and yet they correct their own pot and then you have the rhinos in the rhinos have the van and a cigar rhinos that I’ve eaten so badly over the age of the rhinos of people to do the every one of those guys just about IP because they all represented a client in the primaries and is saying he did a good job is a smart guy like you but every one of those guys take God not smart people but he wants to terminate religious liberty destroy the suburbs of the strike and saving the suburbs I’m getting right of the right I’m getting rid of the regulation project see a beautiful house congratulations you like having a nice project next year has set up a cell and with it comes plenty of crime that’s why they keep saying we only think he’s. Ross also goes to stark industriesand purchases some sonic add ins to help against the hulk regattas some less heavy news that she’ll agent whose colson’s friend melinda may starts datingand when she marries this dude called andrew garner’s now heroesand weird more crazy stuff has been happening for a while so she’ll start up the idea of the avengers initiative this program is designed to bring together a group of remarkable people so when humanity has to face a threat that’s too intense for regular old shield in the military they can help defend the planet experiencing this up as the director of shieldand so is getting eyesand people of potential interest for starting with bruce banner he goes in undercoverand finds banner in a bar somewhere which to me doesn’t seem the patient should be if you’re trying to stay calm but whateverand since into shield agents with the most generic names possible petersonand johnson to get the context banner but it goes a little sidewaysand better hoax outand runs away meanwhile back at youand century afterlife human young child called catcher can control her powersand is causing a lot of damage she runs awayand ends up in the middle east were filled colsonand the women they are simply shield to take her down is forced to kill small child to save the day which is obviously a little upsetting so she retires from fieldworkand takes a desk joband also causes her marriage to kinda fall apart now there’s this fun michael keaton type guy called adrian toombs living a good life for the wifeand little daughter called lives family is everything to tombs to support his family he starts the tomb salvage company which cleans up messes left behind by big incidents which seems like a pretty good idea as the world is getting moreand more superhero eand where their superheroes there are classic cities okay this time I start to get a little muddled here I know there’s a bit of a debate over which year the original aromatics basin but for a number of reasons that don’t really want to get into company in 2009 some people say it’s only like movies released some people since 2010 I personally think it makes no sense if it’s in 2009 especially in relation to iron man twoand other future films I meant to his sickness afterwardsand it features the stark expo 2010 so anyway you should matter that much but it is worth mentioning is still being a billionaire playboy at one point he gets into a bar fight get some assistance from his best friend james rhodes rhody a little later he was in order for something but what I status get it for him because he’s too busy sleeping with reportersand you know doing tony start things despite his playboy in us he also has something of a relationship some kind of flirtatious thing going on with his assistant pepper potts also he’s got a bodyguard called happy to see you know to start industries is still in this morally great business of selling weaponsand tony doesn’t really care because billionaire life but no but I saying the strategies the company for less than legal means he starts equally sign weapons to a terrorist organization called the 10 rings inand also pays the 10 rings to kill tony when he goes to afghanistan because I know but I can when the company tony free however they only kidnap tony once they realize who he isand manny build them weapons to use in the whole process tony is mortally wounded but his life is saved by fellow captive hellionsand mental health ins inputs electromagnet in his chest which keeps the shrapnel in there from killing in which tony benson turns into his dental pet project the arc reactor 10 rings also demand more my for staying because of who they had to kidnap vocalsand sent by shield to go talk to stijnand lindsay is back to shield offers to god himselfand save stark button cure for whatever reason tells them not to start building the weapons that the terrace demanded over three months stark with the help against them as a weapon I suit of armor that he can use to escape which is powered by that arc reactorand is just over this time start also earns a bit more humanity while this is happening natasha romanoff now a great agent of shield is sent out on a mission to escort a scientist in a run hydra sends out the winter soldier to kill the scientist he does so by shooting through them enough after those few months stark uses the armored suit to bust out of prisonand kill some terrorists escapes but yes it is killed along the way start crashand the desertand picked up by the militaryand taken home tony’s a changed man now so people stuck industries on the weapons business which obadiah is pretty pissed about thatand also you know tony is not dead then he is running the company yet tony also get closer to pepper spray a new art directorand start continue to refine his armor make you much slicker matter more weaponsand doing a little hot rod written there eventually he turns into what becomes known as the iron man suit this does take a few months so while all this is happening a woman called colleen wing who is pretty proficient in martial arts comes to america from japan she needs the crew to one of those ancient hat membersand gets recruited as a member of the hand but she’s under the impression that the hand is a good organizationand doesn’t know about all the mass murder of kellyand now the sweet mullet is putting a takeover of the world the first he’s got to get this extreme misting perfectand he needs firebreathing henchmen so he finds a bunch of army veterans who suffered serious injuries to be his test subjects injects them with extremistsand some are successful they grow back last lensand their super grateful some are not successful thoughand explode in a very painful way also at some point here in asgard double click a guy called in near tries to overthrow dennis king but he stopped by thor just a typical day for those guys now back on earth the 10 rings find stocks first armor suit that he escaped with lying around in the desertand they start piecing it back together stijn shows upand sees itand thinks back use thisand so start building his own giant iron man suit all of this is happening continues to make a suit way better now can flyand she repulsed blasts in STUFF he also gets a fancy ad about the systemand into jarvis after his dental butler theory is still quite intrigued by the sole tony stark character solutions vocalsand into talk to stark about this whole situation but stuck ambos moss tony also finds out that some of his companies weapons are still terrorists in afghanistan certifiesand kills a bunch of them because he can is a little brush up in the militaryand canada has revealed his buddy rhody that yeah he’s ironman pepperand finds out that stijn’s been working with terrorists sustains like well that everyone knows a bag I now let us look at tony myself yells exceeds by tony so live closeand goes with pepper to discover stains own iron man suit turning it back to full strength puts in a suitand instead have a consistency punch up stark winsand stained eyes the next day at a big press conference stuck supposed to tell the world that iron man is some kind of robot bodyguard they built but he goes a little off script I am guessing is more in touch with shield while stark is getting this press conference at the manco that guy how stark screwed over all those years ago who is now out of prison dies while watching it is on I think of us take revenge on the stark familyand in a surprisingly short time uses his dad’s old art director blueprints to make his own arc reactorand uses that to make an even cooler iron man suit just kidding he makes some electric lips after the press conference nick fury approach to stark himself this time about the avengers initiative is a guy with a super high tech suit could be useful the time is like air now thanks as he’s leaving starks house cure and tells them don’t need natasha romanoff or this one goesand also helps train this random guy called hendrix to be an agent of shield unimportant detail but it happened all this time jesse don’t forget bruce banner still running the military ultimately ends up in rioand start working at a soda bottle factory all the while stirring to contact a scientist called samuel stearns was trying to find a cure for this whole whole thing is to keep a low profileand figure out how to return to a normal life so she was getting mighty busy these days not only to have the soul avengers thing planned but they also start a project tahiti shield still has that creek corpse just lying aroundand after testing it they discover some of its bodily fluids have a healing effect they can bring someone back from the dead fury orders this project we started with phil colson in charge to extract some these fluids in the event that an avenger is killed in action needs to be brought back to some of the sun dying shield employees but it doesn’t go super well because they start going insaneand drawing maps about underground cree city cyclesand like well this program sucks let’s shut it downand so they do stark stone during the life of being a billionaireand also superheroand starts helping establish world peace as iron man going aroundand being a terrorists he also tries to have a relationship with a woman called lena as you know playboy however the 10 rings find out about thisand kidnap lena’s son afterwards blackmailing her in his dealings ireland blueprints for them however to find out about this because of the situation thenand saves her sonand then stop seeing each other is like how you come back from that stark is like seeing his assistant pepper potts does well peace mission continues as he stops group of 10 rings dudesand hackers from selling as weapons in italy also recovered some stolen paintings because why not messages continues to fight the 10 rings especially in afghanistan as he doing this serializes the corpus arc reactor is slowly poisoning him so he start searching for a cure over in brazil bruce banner is working at soda bottle factoryand one day he asked because his hand so some of his super blood goes in one of the soda bottlesand kill stanley which gets the governmentand military write on the sent now back over to hydra they’re working on yet another super soldier program because that seems to be all they can do after rascal serumand making roma peopleand after their attention to making a superpowered army by combining the super soldier serum with gamma radiationand some of that sweet extremist tech that they somehow got their hands on basically taking every superpower giving thing the mcu entering it in a big melting pot it’s called the centipede program that’s led by john garrett from before you must use it for his own purposes since even with the parts his health is failing also with the program you can plan your either let’s hide or see everything you doand also can kill you if you start doing something wrong another very kinsman like almonds lena starts running the stark expo 2010 to shove a budget attackand relationsand whatnot shows up in the flash to really be the tony that the world knowsand loves my cousin all great for tonio as he also has to govern the senate some of whom are members of hydra is there like the government you have your suit because it’s really dangerousand tony’s like hello claims that no one is close to kings techand he’s created well peace so the government should shut up testifying against him is the somehow smug or induce your tony stark justin hammer is rival in the tech world get out of thereand make up about the ceo stark industries okay nothing start to get a bit more complicated because the three different plot lines all happening at once so hang on lake erie sends natasha romanoff to go undercoverand keep an eye on tony understand the 10 rings are pretty sick of our menacing at their livesand so they get anton blanco was completed his arc reactor based whips away into the monaco grand prix which tony will be attending back in brazil the army’s tract number spends locationand attacksand where he lives the command of a mobile on ski first comes the hulkand runs away waking up in guatemala the next morningand deciding he should go back to his old university to look for more data on finding a whole cure because he just can’t take this anymore roadie who is now also that she needs a strike in the study to work with the governmentand starting to get mildly heated between them romanoff arrives at tony’s place is of the pill in a woman’s coffee unstuck steam so she starts throwing up so natasha can deliver some files to stark yourself to natureand acts exactly how you inspect them to tell youand goes to the monaco grand prix as promisedand stripper places a guy in the race is a guess you do that when your superhero is having a fun time driving when ivan manco shows upand these car in half luckily tony’s gotten on the go armor with himand he defends himself later tongue the bank on prisonand getting really nothing out of it this public display of other art directors being out there though but the government even moreand tony’s ass justin hammer sees thisand breaks I got of prison when him to make iron man like machines for hammer tech so he can upstage tony stark thank you goes along with this but really dispels bunch drones so he can later on post some sweet sweet revenge tony starting poison buys arc reactor in the publics against in the government on his backand himand his best friend are on great terms tony’s life sucks right now is this it was a big drunken birthday party for himself which ultimately ends with himand roadie getting the students who fight roadie not being told the drunk guys off of the suitand gives it to justin hammer unaware of what hammers actually doing behind the scenes meanwhile agent jasper said well she’ll agentand another undercover hydrogen is ordered to keep track of bruce banner one exterior goes to help start with his are correct poisoning also there are big disturbances in the atmosphere on this time in the southwest us caused by some commotion away in asgard which will get you that this concerns some people including astrophysicist jane foster she get in touch with another astrophysicist called xl bigand go to new mexico to check it out she’ll discovers this is happeningand keeps an eye on them now way back across the universe in asgard authorities finally of the age where he gets to be the new king even though he’s areaand a spoiled bratand locus jealous but hay is getting corrugated it’s his big day but it gets interrupted by the frost giant sneakingand owns vaultand trying to take away that casket of ancient winters point is that was really upset that his days ruinedand also that the frost I spokeand we know so that is bossy consisting of f than the warriors interchangeable coffee oppenheim to fight the frost giants for what they did this is specifically against oden’s instructions but again thor is dumband arrogant a fight starts but only comes aroundand breaks it up is pretty mad at the door so takes away all his godly powersand his powerful hammer mule near creekside note the owner was made from the core of a dying starand helps to control his lighting powersand also only be lifted by whoever’s worthy of it store down to earth new mexico specifically is harold’s land somewhere nearby as well as activity theory since vocalsand down to new mexico to check out all the business on his way their closest oxen armed robbery at a convenience store because he’s just not good back to start tony’s hang on a big doughnutand has a talk with a fury who wants to help them also natasha romanoff reveals himself as black widow to them justin hammer starts upgrading the armor really gave themand changes it from this to this while that’s happening tony discovers a map of the old stark expo at secret formula for making a new element that his dad left him all of those years ago which is also the perfect replacement for his arc reactor somewhat conveniently so yeah that’s fixed tony’s no longer dying now you just worry about the crazy russianand the smarmy businessmen at this point bruce banner is also gone back to the old university hang out with an old friend of his now justin hammer showing off his ivan banker design drones at the stark expo but vanco goes for zone motives of killing starkand hijacks the dronesand sends them after tony also hijacks the war machine armor with roadieand it is chase during which tony says a little kid is a fan of his called peter parker come in to play more later eventually ready to control the soup back in himand tony team up to destroy all the drones while black widowand tony’s bodyguard happy fightsand I got henchmen eventually tonyand 35 vancoand a giant iron man type suitand blowing them upand killing him by combining the repulsive powers hammer gets arrested gets a kissand really gets the armor kind of soup from not okay when the question meanwhile back in new mexico jane foster xl bigand jane’s friend darcy find thor all powerless like in the desert daysand then set into the hospital she also started asking thor’s hammer mule near owner realizes how big business in the situation could be so also sends clint barton to help closeand with it the escape from the hospital using his asgard trainingand meets up with janeand they start having a little bit of a romance back in asgard loki discovers that he is not shielding sonand I frost giant which makes them pretty upsetand falls into a deep sleep that has to take once in a while called oden sleepand locus is playing a treacherous plan to get owns approval back which involves the frost giants to attack inand then saving his dad’s life is adopted that not his real dad back with banner bruce meets up with bettyand they get back together however in the process the military figure out he’s thereand have for the locationand the loss gets injected with a version of the super soldier serum things to ross tobin take on the whole which means he can survive this sort of thing seeing gen. Help ourselves otherwise all the chocolates would just end up sitting in his cupboards for a year and he wasn’t about to get kids year old suites come next Halloween we basically had the jackpot thinking we could just rinse the old fellow of the suites and make up for the paltry amount we collected over what had been an unusually fruitless trick or treating session only he said there was one small problem since he was getting on in years and then get out much his oldest grown up son had come by to drop off all the suites along with his usual weekly shopping then without having thought it through his son and put all the suites in the top cupboard of his back pantry one that was way too high for him to reach without doing is back in if a couple of us were willing to help them reach the cupboards and take a few tens of supreme in the process suites were ours all of them 90 you’re thinking God’s name is daft enough to just wander into a complete stranger’s house in the middle the night apparently we were and See Other related products: I Don't Understand Your Specific Kind Of Stupid But I Do Admire Your Total Commitment To It T-Shirt
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