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ix3ltm · 5 years

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I created this account several months ago to serve as a journal when I don’t feel like handwriting. When my anxiety is high I often feel as though my thoughts are too quick and fleeting to be able to get them down on a page fast enough... sometimes I don’t even know exactly how I am feeling because I am feeling all sorts of things at once and when I attempt to make it out on a page or even to another human being I often feel as though it just comes out as if I’m just some blabbering idiot. The reality behind why I am finally writing something on this is because it currently feels as if the whole world is turning upside down and it has felt this way for months. 2020 has been a grim year to say the least and I guess I am at the point where I don’t even care if I sound like a blabbering idiot, I just need to get my thoughts out before I explode into bits and pieces. In current news, the Covid-19 pandemic is underway and really causing quite the ruckus; people are going absolutely mad (including myself, don’t let me fool you). People are scared and people react when they’re scared, unfortunately sometimes they react in a scary fucking way. I guess I can’t blame them though, nobody was prepared for this to happen. I’ts a surreal feeling to see the impending horrors that I’ve worried about for all of my life to unfold right before my eyes- although this is not what I specifically pictured, I’ve always been quite fatalistic in my thought process and this is comparable to what I have imagined in the past. I don’t necessarily agree with the way people are handling this situation, but I am not at all shocked. The people who hold power that fail to step up, to allocate resources correctly, and that remain firm in their greed do not surprise me nor do the people who are having literal fist fights over toilet paper; human beings are shit, and this is in no way a shock to me. I’m no conspiracy theorist, but I wouldn’t even be surprised to find out that there was some grandiose political scheme behind this because the reality is, it can happen and if there is a will, there is a way, especially if you have billions of dollars and mass amounts of power... I didn’t start writing this so I could start my conspiracy theory, truthfully I don’t even pay much attention to politics anyways so my theory would be quite uneducated and probably stupid as hell, that is to say if i were to have one. See what I mean? Blabbering idiot, even when I’m typing my thoughts and have the capability to fucking delete the dumb ones. Today I’m going to keep the stupid thoughts though, keep it raw for the one or two people that may scroll past this post. I hate that I don’t know if whoever’s reading this may not realize that was sarcasm, so full disclosure, that was sarcasm. Anyways, this covid-19 bullshit is driving my anxiety to extreme levels and I think I am almost to the point of insanity. Before this all happened, I was graced with the news that my mother’s brain disease has progressed and she is in need of her 3rd brain surgery. It has already been hard watching her struggle through this disease; finances, the loss of basic motor functions, and the transition from being a working, functioning “normal” person to the life of a “disabled” unable to work person. We were not at all expecting to hear the disease had progressed and at that point, I was horrified at the “what ifs” of the situation, I still am. I don’t want to go into the shit details of it all but, if you aren’t aware of the fucked up nature of our healthcare system and how traumatizing it is to discover you are sick when you have no money to afford treatment, then I would highly suggest looking into it. I feel quite bad for my mother and the situation that she is in. I selfishly feel bad for myself that I have to pan out in my mind the possibility of losing my mother at such a young age and that I may not have time to fix any of the problems between her and I... yet in hindsight, I guess I’ve panned that out several times before since my mother has been keen to threatening suicide for most of my life... I’m sidetracking. So first Covid-19 stopped me from seeing my mother and spending time with her before her surgery as she demanded we stay away and prevent any possibility of giving her the virus (not that we have it, you may have noticed mania runs in the fam!), and then yesterday my mother’s surgery was cancelled because Covid-19 patients need the beds and the surgery is not needed immediately. Sick right? Pun intended. So now she and her entire family, including myself, are forced to wait nearly three weeks to even discuss rescheduling. Crazy how unprepared our healthcare system is for a disaster considering this isn’t the first pandemic in the world..? It makes you wonder how every other person is individually impacted by this situation. Who else’s health is pushed aside because there is a possibility the hospitals will be overcrowded? Fucking weird times man. I feel for everyone during this and hope the crisis is averted quickly. I also feel for myself as I fear my high anxiety is going to cause me to lose my job... I’ve felt as though I’ve been having a heart attack for two weeks straight, I feel as though a stack of bricks has been laid on top of my chest; I’m suffocating. Then having to go to work, amidst all of the panic, causes my anxiety to worsen even more... I’m suffocating and drowning all at the same time and nobody can help me. I know I am not the only one that feels this way, I’m not unique in this... yet I cannot help but sometimes pity myself. If I had ever gotten my way, I would have never existed to even be apart of this mess we call life. Sorry to be so honest, but I really didn’t sign up for this and if there was an exit door where nobodies feelings would be hurt if I left, I would walk the fuck out in a heart beat. This is getting depressing now, so I guess I’ll stop. Cheers to whoever finds this and reads this... sorry for wasting your life and brain cells :’)

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asterz-not-playing-yet · 5 years

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Songbird | Part 1/0

The void was rather dark, Maestro couldn’t help but notice, as he surveyed he area with his music-note eyes. If it weren’t for the presence of Phaunicer and the rabbit, he would surely have returned to his own universe post-haste. He had never had the misfortune to traverse this area all by his lonesome before, and he would rather not find himself making such a journey anytime soon.

“I don’t think Maestro would like this guy at all… he’s too… touchy?” the little fox was saying, referring to a skeleton that Bunny had apparently discovered in the Anti-void recently. “What do you think, Maestro?”

The monster in question shook his head, agreeing with Phaunicer entirely. “Certainly not,” he answered, his tone echoing his feeling of utter disgust at the thought of meeting the clearly ill-mannered monster, “Everybody knows that germs can be transferred by touch, and I truly am not fond of that. Unless ’tis my sons, I wouldn’t dare touch ye. Honestly… this one is much more horrible than that savage beast.” He grimaced, remembering his last encounter with the unruly skeleton. “If Fell can’t stand him, how would thee think I would react upon encountering this… this…” Maestro struggled to find a suitable word to describe the new Gaster. “…Anomaly? Although... I wouldstand up for Blindy. I wouldn’t want that creature making him uncomfortable… he already has a disability,” Maestro finished, referring to the appropriately-nicknamed skeleton’s permanent blindness.

“*Mnn*… I guess you’re kind of right,” Phaunicer agreed, “Although, he has his own character. That’s something like-able about him…”

“Like-able?!” Maestro cried, shocked that the fox would describe Swapfell with such terminology, “Art thou out of thee’s mind?!”

“W-what…?”

The skeleton sighed, exasperated. “…Oh… never mind.”

Bunny laughed a little at the interaction between the pair. “Naw… I’m gonna agree with Maestro here,” she said, reflecting on how the subject had treated her and the Gang in the past, “This guy is a jerk and loves to examine ‘specimens’ that might catch his interest.”

Confused, and a little wary of what the answer may be, Maestro opened his mouth to inquire upon what exactly Bunnymuse had meant by that statement, but before he could say a word, the rabbit’s eyes went wide with fear. “OH CRAP!” she cried, grabbing Phauncier by the paw, “Here he comes…!!” Bunny dove into a hole that had somehow appeared in the floor, dragging the fox with her and leaving Maestro entirely alone.

Or, rather… almost entirely…

“Now, now… where did that adorable small humanoid Oryctolagus Cuninculus go? I should’ve expected it to maintain the speed of any Oryctolagus Cuninculus, silly me…” a deceptively kind, cheeky voice pondered from the darkness nearby. A chill ran down Maestro’s spine, and he turned towards the voice, dreading who might be the one speaking, and hoping with all his soul that he might be wrong. Unfortunately for him, his suspicions were only confirmed as he spotted the infamous skeleton.

The monster, (who had likely been the one to give monsters a bad name in the first place), apparently feeling Maestro’s eyes on him, looked around and spotted the petrified skeleton. The sides of his mouth curled upwards into a crooked, shark-toothed smile, causing Maestro’s panic to only worsen as he saw how the demon was staring at him. “And what do we have here…?” Swapfell chuckled, inching closer to the new “person of interest” so as to try and get a better look at him.

Maestro froze as the skeleton neared him. Attempting to appear unfazed, (which he was most certainly not), he gave a small, nervous cough. “Excuse me...” he said, addressing the monster before him in a shaky voice, “...But thou art invading my space… and I would appreciate it… if you would leave my blind friend alone, please.”

Swapfell chuckled again, making Maestro flinch a little as he felt the demon’s breath on his face. “Ah, yes… B, as the 'others' tend to call him. He is quite the unique specimen… not exactly humanoid, but not entirely animalistic. If only I could study him closer…” he grimaced, his voice becoming annoyed as he seemed to recall some previous attempt to “study” the poor Gaster, “…If it weren’t for that red idiotkeeping him so close to him.” The demon’s shark-like smile returned as he refocused his gaze returned to Maestro. “However, if you so wish for me to leave such a beautiful specimen alone, I can always study you, then…”

Without warning, the skeleton stepped closer and placed his hand on Maestro’s cheek, where his bass crack was located. The mysophobic monster shuddered involuntarily, mentally pleading Swapfell to get away and leave him and his friends alone, preferably for eternity. “You may not be as interesting as 'B' is, but I still do find you fascinating,” the demon continued, studying the new specimen intently. “These cracks on your face do catch my attention… and those eyes of yours are quite unique to your kind, aren’t they? They say the eyes are the windows to your soul… I wonder what yours looks like…” He chuckled darkly.

Swapfell’s words were ringing in poor Maestro’s head as he tried valiantly to refrain from trembling like a leaf. This was almost too much for him… Suddenly, something that the monster had said seemed to leap out at him. “If you so wish for me to leave such a beautiful specimen alone, I can always study you, then…”A half-formed idea arose in the kind-souled skeleton’s mind… he closed his eyes for a moment, and when he reopened them, the music notes had been replaced with treble-clefs, his piercing gaze directed at the mannerless hooligan before him. Swapfell seemed slightly surprised for a moment, but the expression faded as Maestro began to speak.

“Art thou sure…” the noble monster began slowly, choosing his words with care, “…If I agree to be one of your… 'specimens'… thee will leave Blindy alone?”

The demon seemed amused by this question. “How intriguing… you would be willing to be my 'specimen’?” Swapfell’s grin widened as he appeared to think it over. “Allow me to examine you in any way I see fit, or preform any procedure on you… for the sake of one 'friend’.” He chuckled. “Well then, I suppose I should be fair… if you were to become my ‘new toy’, then I will certainly leave the other one alone. I will give you all my undying attention and services in return. I expect the same. After all…” The skeleton let go of Maestro’s face (much to his relief) and gave a small bow, seeming strangely excited about the entire concept, “…I am a gentleman as well as a scientist.”

Maestro resisted the urge to scoff aloud at the final statement as his eyes returned to their usual music-note shapes. A gentleman? That was hardly a suitable way of describing this… this madman that was standing before him. He pulled a handkerchief out of his tailcoat pocket, and wiped his face in attempt to get at least some of the germs and bacteria that were now surely leading a microscopic rampage across his skull, letting out a sigh as he did so. “A true gentleman,” Maestro corrected him, his voice shaking a bit as he spoke, “Would never plot nor think bad thoughts against another... and I refuse to be called a toy. I may consider putting myself in danger for a dear friend, but I will not answer to someone who thinks so lowly of me.” His voice grew indignant as he continued, attempting to make himself sound a bit less frightened than he actually was. His music-note eyes, however, contrasted his tone entirely, as they had now turned upside down, signaling his distress. “Just so thee know, not even one of the ‘others' lays a hand on me, not even Fell. *Hmmph*… thee has no hint of humility whatsoever.”

“Yes, well, I suppose I have been out of practice for a while... and again, I must apologize, for you are far better than a ‘toy’ to me. Toys break, and I presume you won’t.” Swapfell paused for a second, cocking his head slightly to the right like a dog listening for something. His sinister smile remained almost frozen on his face. “Actually, you haven’t really consented to the agreement, have you? So then… will you be my new specimen, or will I just have to continue ‘searching’ for one?”

“...Alright…” Maestro sighed, rubbing the sides of his head with his gloved hand. However, he knew this monster could not be trusted, not with keeping a promise that would be so easy to break without any consequences for the one who might do so. There was only one way to make absolutely sure that Swapfell wouldn’t break it...

Maestro stopped rubbing his head as his eyes began to glow blue, his voice ringing like the bells in a bell tower as he continued, “...I’ll agree with thee’s terms. Let thee be true to thy word, having these walls remember every sentence and every vibration of thy words’ syllables… turn back on thy word, and the stave of betrayal shall wrap thee until thee breaks. No harm nor bad intention will come to Blindy, but I will take his place.” As the skeleton finished his proposal, his eyes returned to their normal state, and for a moment the words seemed to echo as if spoken within a large room, gradually fading as the agreement was sealed. “I don’t like being betrayed…” Maestro sighed, a bit tired after using that sort of magic, “So this will act as a security measure… to ensure my friend is safe from a fiend such as thyself.”

_______________________________________________________________________

Maestro belongs to @phaunicier. Swapfell Gaster belongs to @bun-bunmuse.

(Sorry for any misspellings. This is still sort of a work in progress, but I hope to be done with “chapter one/part one” soon. :) Thank you to Bunny and Fox for allowing me to do this! )

#songbird #phaunicier #bun-bunmuse #rp story #hope you like it!

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alivannarose · 6 years

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Laziness Does Not Exist

But unseen barriers do.

[This article was posted on Medium, written by Erika Price]

I’ve been a psychology professor since 2012. In the past six years, I’ve witnessed students of all ages procrastinate on papers, skip presentation days, miss assignments, and let due dates fly by. I’ve seen promising prospective grad students fail to get applications in on time; I’ve watched PhD candidates take months or years revising a single dissertation draft; I once had a student who enrolled in the same class of mine two semesters in a row, and never turned in anything either time.

I don’t think laziness was ever at fault.

Ever.

In fact, I don’t believe that laziness exists.

I’m a social psychologist, so I’m interested primarily in the situational and contextual factors that drive human behavior. When you’re seeking to predict or explain a person’s actions, looking at the social norms, and the person’s context, is usually a pretty safe bet. Situational constraints typically predict behavior far better than personality, intelligence, or other individual-level traits.

So when I see a student failing to complete assignments, missing deadlines, or not delivering results in other aspects of their life, I’m moved to ask: what are the situational factors holding this student back? What needs are currently not being met? And, when it comes to behavioral “laziness”, I’m especially moved to ask: what are the barriers to action that I can’t see?

There are always barriers. Recognizing those barriers— and viewing them as legitimate — is often the first step to breaking “lazy” behavior patterns.

…

It’s really helpful to respond to a person’s ineffective behavior with curiosity rather than judgment. I learned this from a friend of mine, the writer and activist Kimberly Longhofer (who publishes under Mik Everett). Kim is passionate about the acceptance and accommodation of disabled people and homeless people. Their writing about both subjects is some of the most illuminating, bias-busting work I’ve ever encountered. Part of that is because Kim is brilliant, but it’s also because at various points in their life, Kim has been both disabled and homeless.

Kim is the person who taught me that judging a homeless person for wanting to buy alcohol or cigarettes is utter folly. When you’re homeless, the nights are cold, the world is unfriendly, and everything is painfully uncomfortable. Whether you’re sleeping under a bridge, in a tent, or at a shelter, it’s hard to rest easy. You are likely to have injuries or chronic conditions that bother you persistently, and little access to medical care to deal with it. You probably don’t have much healthy food.

In that chronically uncomfortable, over-stimulating context, needing a drink or some cigarettes makes fucking sense. As Kim explained to me, if you’re laying out in the freezing cold, drinking some alcohol may be the only way to warm up and get to sleep. If you’re under-nourished, a few smokes may be the only thing that kills the hunger pangs. And if you’re dealing with all this while also fighting an addiction, then yes, sometimes you just need to score whatever will make the withdrawal symptoms go away, so you can survive.

Few people who haven’t been homeless think this way. They want to moralize the decisions of poor people, perhaps to comfort themselves about the injustices of the world. For many, it’s easier to think homeless people are, in part, responsible for their suffering than it is to acknowledge the situational factors.

And when you don’t fully understand a person’s context — what it feels like to be them every day, all the small annoyances and major traumas that define their life — it’s easy to impose abstract, rigid expectations on a person’s behavior. All homeless people should put down the bottle and get to work. Never mind that most of them have mental health symptoms and physical ailments, and are fighting constantly to be recognized as human. Never mind that they are unable to get a good night’s rest or a nourishing meal for weeks or months on end. Never mind that even in my comfortable, easy life, I can’t go a few days without craving a drink or making an irresponsible purchase. They have to do better.

But they’re already doing the best they can. I’ve known homeless people who worked full-time jobs, and who devoted themselves to the care of other people in their communities. A lot of homeless people have to navigate bureaucracies constantly, interfacing with social workers, case workers, police officers, shelter staff, Medicaid staff, and a slew of charities both well-meaning and condescending. It’s a lot of fucking work to be homeless. And when a homeless or poor person runs out of steam and makes a “bad decision”, there’s a damn good reason for it.

If a person’s behavior doesn’t make sense to you, it is because you are missing a part of their context. It’s that simple. I’m so grateful to Kim and their writing for making me aware of this fact. No psychology class, at any level, taught me that. But now that it is a lens that I have, I find myself applying it to all kinds of behaviors that are mistaken for signs of moral failure — and I’ve yet to find one that can’t be explained and empathized with.

…

Let’s look at a sign of academic “laziness” that I believe is anything but: procrastination.

People love to blame procrastinators for their behavior. Putting off work sure looks lazy, to an untrained eye. Even the people who are actively doing the procrastinating can mistake their behavior for laziness. You’re supposed to be doing something, and you’re not doing it — that’s a moral failure right? That means you’re weak-willed, unmotivated, and lazy, doesn’t it?

For decades, psychological research has been able to explain procrastination as a functioning problem, not a consequence of laziness. When a person fails to begin a project that they care about, it’s typically due to either a) anxiety about their attempts not being “good enough” or b) confusion about what the first steps of the task are. Not laziness. In fact, procrastination is more likely when the task is meaningful and the individual cares about doing it well.

When you’re paralyzed with fear of failure, or you don’t even know how to begin a massive, complicated undertaking, it’s damn hard to get shit done. It has nothing to do with desire, motivation, or moral upstandingness. Procastinators can will themselves to work for hours; they can sit in front of a blank word document, doing nothing else, and torture themselves; they can pile on the guilt again and again — none of it makes initiating the task any easier. In fact, their desire to get the damn thing done may worsen their stress and make starting the task harder.

The solution, instead, is to look for what is holding the procrastinator back. If anxiety is the major barrier, the procrastinator actually needs to walk away from the computer/book/word document and engage in a relaxing activity. Being branded “lazy” by other people is likely to lead to the exact opposite behavior.

Often, though, the barrier is that procrastinators have executive functioning challenges — they struggle to divide a large responsibility into a series of discrete, specific, and ordered tasks. Here’s an example of executive functioning in action: I completed my dissertation (from proposal to data collection to final defense) in a little over a year. I was able to write my dissertation pretty easily and quickly because I knew that I had to a) compile research on the topic, b) outline the paper, c) schedule regular writing periods, and d) chip away at the paper, section by section, day by day, according to a schedule I had pre-determined.

Nobody had to teach me to slice up tasks like that. And nobody had to force me to adhere to my schedule. Accomplishing tasks like this is consistent with how my analytical, hyper-focused, Autistic little brain works. Most people don’t have that ease. They need an external structure to keep them writing — regular writing group meetings with friends, for example — and deadlines set by someone else. When faced with a major, massive project, most people want advice for how to divide it into smaller tasks, and a timeline for completion. In order to track progress, most people require organizational tools, such as a to-do list, calendar, datebook, or syllabus.

Needing or benefiting from such things doesn’t make a person lazy. It just means they have needs. The more we embrace that, the more we can help people thrive.

…

I had a student who was skipping class. Sometimes I’d see her lingering near the building, right before class was about to start, looking tired. Class would start, and she wouldn’t show up. When she was present in class, she was a bit withdrawn; she sat in the back of the room, eyes down, energy low. She contributed during small group work, but never talked during larger class discussions.

A lot of my colleagues would look at this student and think she was lazy, disorganized, or apathetic. I know this because I’ve heard how they talk about under-performing students. There’s often rage and resentment in their words and tone — why won’t this student take my class seriously? Why won’t they make me feel important, interesting, smart?

But my class had a unit on mental health stigma. It’s a passion of mine, because I’m a neuroatypical psychologist. I know how unfair my field is to people like me. The class & I talked about the unfair judgments people levy against those with mental illness; how depression is interpreted as laziness, how mood swings are framed as manipulative, how people with “severe” mental illnesses are assumed incompetent or dangerous.

The quiet, occasionally-class-skipping student watched this discussion with keen interest. After class, as people filtered out of the room, she hung back and asked to talk to me. And then she disclosed that she had a mental illness and was actively working to treat it. She was busy with therapy and switching medications, and all the side effects that entails. Sometimes, she was not able to leave the house or sit still in a classroom for hours. She didn’t dare tell her other professors that this was why she was missing classes and late, sometimes, on assignments; they’d think she was using her illness as an excuse. But she trusted me to understand.

And I did. And I was so, so angry that this student was made to feel responsible for her symptoms. She was balancing a full course load, a part-time job, and ongoing, serious mental health treatment. And she was capable of intuiting her needs and communicating them with others. She was a fucking badass, not a lazy fuck. I told her so.

She took many more classes with me after that, and I saw her slowly come out of her shell. By her Junior and Senior years, she was an active, frank contributor to class — she even decided to talk openly with her peers about her mental illness. During class discussions, she challenged me and asked excellent, probing questions. She shared tons of media and current-events examples of psychological phenomena with us. When she was having a bad day, she told me, and I let her miss class. Other professors — including ones in the psychology department — remained judgmental towards her, but in an environment where her barriers were recognized and legitimized, she thrived.

…

Over the years, at that same school, I encountered countless other students who were under-estimated because the barriers in their lives were not seen as legitimate. There was the young man with OCD who always came to class late, because his compulsions sometimes left him stuck in place for a few moments. There was the survivor of an abusive relationship, who was processing her trauma in therapy appointments right before my class each week. There was the young woman who had been assaulted by a peer — and who had to continue attending classes with that peer, while the school was investigating the case.

These students all came to me willingly, and shared what was bothering them. Because I discussed mental illness, trauma, and stigma in my class, they knew I would be understanding. And with some accommodations, they blossomed academically. They gained confidence, made attempts at assignments that intimidated them, raised their grades, started considering graduate school and internships. I always found myself admiring them. When I was a college student, I was nowhere near as self-aware. I hadn’t even begun my lifelong project of learning to ask for help.

…

Students with barriers were not always treated with such kindness by my fellow psychology professors. One colleague, in particular, was infamous for providing no make-up exams and allowing no late arrivals. No matter a student’s situation, she was unflinchingly rigid in her requirements. No barrier was insurmountable, in her mind; no limitation was acceptable. People floundered in her class. They felt shame about their sexual assault histories, their anxiety symptoms, their depressive episodes. When a student who did poorly in her classes performed well in mine, she was suspicious.

It’s morally repugnant to me that any educator would be so hostile to the people they are supposed to serve. It’s especially infuriating, that the person enacting this terror was a psychologist. The injustice and ignorance of it leaves me teary every time I discuss it. It’s a common attitude in many educational circles, but no student deserves to encounter it.

…

I know, of course, that educators are not taught to reflect on what their students’ unseen barriers are. Some universities pride themselves on refusing to accommodate disabled or mentally ill students — they mistake cruelty for intellectual rigor. And, since most professors are people who succeeded academically with ease, they have trouble taking the perspective of someone with executive functioning struggles, sensory overloads, depression, self-harm histories, addictions, or eating disorders. I can see the external factors that lead to these problems. Just as I know that “lazy” behavior is not an active choice, I know that judgmental, elitist attitudes are typically borne of out situational ignorance.

And that’s why I’m writing this piece. I’m hoping to awaken my fellow educators — of all levels — to the fact that if a student is struggling, they probably aren’t choosing to. They probably want to do well. They probably are trying. More broadly, I want all people to take a curious and empathic approach to individuals whom they initially want to judge as “lazy” or irresponsible.

If a person can’t get out of bed, something is making them exhausted. If a student isn’t writing papers, there’s some aspect of the assignment that they can’t do without help. If an employee misses deadlines constantly, something is making organization and deadline-meeting difficult. Even if a person is actively choosing to self-sabotage, there’s a reason for it — some fear they’re working through, some need not being met, a lack of self-esteem being expressed.

People do not choose to fail or disappoint. No one wants to feel incapable, apathetic, or ineffective. If you look at a person’s action (or inaction) and see only laziness, you are missing key details. There is always an explanation. There are always barriers. Just because you can’t see them, or don’t view them as legitimate, doesn’t mean they’re not there. Look harder.

Maybe you weren’t always able to look at human behavior this way. That’s okay. Now you are. Give it a try.

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allenmendezsr · 4 years

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Anxiety Disorder - Blue Heron Health News

New Post has been published on https://autotraffixpro.app/allenmendezsr/anxiety-disorder-blue-heron-health-news/

Anxiety Disorder - Blue Heron Health News

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I used to suffer from anxiety attacks. They were intense and they were frequent. And, in a number of ways, they nearly ruined my life.

My anxiety disorder grew steadily worse over the 16 years I suffered it. It seemed to gather strength over time… while my ability to cope with it gradually weakened.

There honestly were times where I wondered where it would all eventually end.

Things are different now.

I don’t suffer anxiety attacks like that any more. I haven’t for nearly two years and my mental health is pretty much fully restored.

It took some time for me to finally get better.

Although, to be truthful, time was something I had plenty of.

Because 16 years of anxiety attacks – and everything that entails – wasn’t going to mind an extra few weeks of the same.

But by the time it had came to its end my anxiety had shrunk to a shadow of its former self.

I don’t miss it!

And why would I?

Any type of anxiety disorder is just plain cruel

Anxiety kicked me around emotionally, mentally and physically.

Anxiety episodes themselves were often dreadful.

Frantic, panicky, scared… Worrying about all sorts of small details, ruminating to the point of panic…

Mentally I’d go round in circles and just think myself into distress and powerlessness.

Anxiety disturbed my sleep to the point I could sometimes wake up more tired than I was when I had gone to bed.

And, inevitably, the misery of it all slipped me into occasional depression.

Mild depression is so common for people who suffer from any kind of anxiety disorder. I simply couldn’t recall the last time I felt relaxed or at ease.

Retreating from life

I tried so hard to avoid anxiety attacks that I retreated from situations and people that might trigger them.

The problem was that for me there were so many possible triggers that I was in danger at times of becoming a recluse.

My anxiety disorder made it difficult for me to make – and sustain – friendships.

Career aspirations took a back-burner too. I had to choose work where my bosses were completely understanding.

And where me being an emotional mess all of a sudden wasn’t going to get me fired! Which does restrict your options somewhat.

Not the future I wanted

I often feared that the effect anxiety was having on my relationships might leave me lonely and without friends. I didn’t want to be lonely…

I especially worried that my ability to work and support myself would deteriorate as the condition made my mental health slowly worsen.

And the physical cost – in terms of conditions that come from ongoing, chronic stress – didn’t bear thinking about.

Because the ongoing stress of my disorder is known conclusively to lead to chronic inflammation in the body.

And with too much inflammation an anxiety sufferer becomes a prime candidate for inflammatory disease. Which includes diabetes, fatty liver, kidney disease, arthritis, heart disease and some cancers.

So as well as a deteriorating mental health outlook…physical disability was an ever-present fear.

Doubting myself

All this made me wonder about me…

What was wrong with me? Why am I like this? What must I look like to other people? What would they be thinking about me?

I really did think sometimes that I was just a ridiculous person.

I tried the usual remedies…

I did everything I could to deal with my anxiety.

Medications made some difference. They often – although not always – took the edge off the worst anxiety attacks.

I took anxiety drugs for a while during my early years of the disease. Eventually on my doctor’s advice I stopped taking them. I was glad to stop – for two reasons.

First, the side-effects of the meds were similar to my actual anxiety! Agitation, sleep problems, loss of memory, poor concentration – even some confusion at times.

Second was that meds don’t address the actual causes of the anxiety.

They only work on symptoms – so you remain ill even when you’re drugged up.

The underlying causes of anxiety remain firmly in place… forever chipping away at your chances of ever having a truly happy life.

I didn’t like putting all those drugs into my body.

And I certainly didn’t like the fact that those meds can become habit forming – which is one of the reasons doctors try to get you off them as quickly as they can.

So what next?

So, like many anxiety sufferers, that left me having to use a variety of techniques to handle my condition.

Some approaches worked from time to time. Nothing was truly reliable though.

I truly thought then that reversing the condition was impossible.

I was wrong… but that was my thinking back then when I was ill.

In the meantime I was pretty stuck. I had better days and I had really difficult days. I rarely had two better days together. After years of suffering like this my anxiety disorder was making me grow tired and despondent.

Bad news… and good news

Even though I wasn’t sure that an anxiety disorder could be successfully treated it didn’t stop me from searching for some sort of miracle cure.

The bad news is that such a thing does not exist.

There are, of course, people out there who say otherwise.

They promise they’ll get rid of all types of anxieties using a secret potion made of some secret tree root they discovered in the forests of somewhere like Panama.

Other ‘gurus’ offer remedies based on all sorts of exotic rituals and exercises. A kind of faith healing, if you like.

I tried enough of them to know that none of these approaches offer single shred of improvement to an anxiety disorder.

There’s good reason why these quirky, untested approaches didn’t work. The people offering these ‘remedies’ simply didn’t understand what anxiety actually is.

They just didn’t understand that all anxiety disorders are intricate conditions with multiple layers of complexity.

There’s not a single pill or an exercise a person can do that’s going to make it go away just like that.

To make a change to an anxiety disorder requires a deep understanding of all the strands that have tied themselves together to create that disorder in the first place.

Thinking you can cure everything with a potion or a yoga exercise is just plain wrong.

Still, the promises are made. And people like me, desperate for some relief, fell for a few of them.

But now there’s some good news. Really, really good news.

If you’re patient, gentle with yourself and willing to slowly work through science-based, research-backed activities… then your world can change.

My world definitely did change.

It changed forever. I didn’t expect it to be this good. I sometimes can hardly believe that it is!

I stumbled on all this by accident

Some years ago I attended an anxiety support group where I used to live. We met weekly and although it didn’t do much to help with my anxiety it was comforting to not be alone with the problem.

It was on a visit back to that old neighborhood that I bumped into one of the group’s members.

Well. Ex-member, to be precise.

Martin had suffered from a different disorder to me – he had OCD for years – and I remembered that he had a hellish time getting it under control.

And although I couldn’t completely understand Martin’s world – my anxiety was generalised anxiety disorder (GAD) with occasional panic attacks (just to make life interesting) – I do know he had struggled a lot.

But while I still had very bad anxiety Martin had…. nothing.

No symptoms of OCD. No stress. No depression. No nothing.

We stopped off for a coffee and he explained what had happened.

The pathway out of anxiety

In a nutshell, Martin had become so despairing of his condition that he’d tried out some natural remedies. If modern medicine couldn’t help him then perhaps alternative medicine could.

Some of the different methods he’d tried had reduced the intensity of his symptoms – which meant that he could function better.

Excited by this small progress he’d gone down the alternative health rabbit hole… and then resurfaced with what he called ‘a miracle’.

Having tried many routes Martin had found a straightforward program that gave sufferers of all types of anxiety a clear but gentle pathway out of their problem – and into repaired and restored mental health.

All anxiety disorders are improved

Martin told me the method he used worked on these types of anxiety disorder:

Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) and similar types of excessive and uncontrollable worries

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and its 4 major profiles

Panic Disorder, including agoraphobia and other intense experiences of fear or emotional discomfort

Post-traumatic Stress Disorder and similar illnesses related to traumatic experiences

Social Anxiety Disorder and other debilitating social fears and anxieties

Martin explained that his condition had melted away bit by bit over time. He’d first noticed a slight lessening of the intensity of his symptoms.

And then a reduction in their frequency.

Over time, intensity and frequency reduced to… just about nothing.

I remember that at the time he was telling me all this, I think my mouth must have hung open. At times he laughed at my expression. ‘It’s true!’ he insisted. And I nearly believed him.

Of course, now I really believe him. Because I’ve had his experience with my own anxiety disorder.

How it works

Martin told me he had been introduced to an alternative health practitioner by the name of Christian Goodman.

Christian Goodman is the creator of a very successful anxiety disorder program that is producing outstanding results for many hundreds of people.

It’s this program that had changed Martin’s life so dramatically.

Now I’m a little sceptical about alternative cures. I do mostly trust doctors and the drugs companies. Not everyone does of course.

But Martin’s advice to try out Christian Goodman’s ‘The End of Anxiety’ program came at a time when I was becomng increasingly worried about both my mental and physical deterioration.

I had reached a stage where I really was prepared to try anything – and this seemed like a pretty good bet.

My route out of anxiety

Christian’s ‘The End of Anxiety’ program guided me carefully through a set of activities that I could do at home whenever I felt up to it.

As I worked through these activities over time so my anxiety gently melted away until it no longer existed.

The program was simple, straightforward and consisted of several types of activities:

Daily habits Some simple daily work that takes a few minutes but which does some of the most wonderful healing I have ever experienced

When-you-feel-like-it activities Some thinking type exercises that helped me change my relationship with myself and my condition. These were transformative…

One-off actions Simple but important things I only had to do once but which revealed really useful insights into what I was suffering

Self-care habits I didn’t know much about how to truly care for myself until I learnt it from Christian. In truth, I didn’t realize how important it was either – until I actually did it. Amongst all the small but memorable victories I enjoyed with this program I think self-care gave me the quickest release from my anxiety misery.

Action activities There are specific things you can do that over time make you healthier in the mind and body. Very simple but once I started I really didn’t want to stop. So I haven’t. Why stop doing what makes you happy?

Beginner’s nerves

I was nervous at first… starting this program itself made me anxious!

It’s almost as if my anxiety was protecting itself from me getting rid of it.

But there were two things I loved about this program.

First, was that there was no timeline for completion, no schedule that forced me to do things in a certain time.

The rate at which I adopted these changes was decided by me and how I felt about them. Sometimes I did more work, sometimes I did less.

It was like a dance… slow, slow, quick, quick, slow. Except that it was me who decided the rhythm and pace.

Second, Christian cautioned me against placing expectations on myself. Things might improve a lot one week but only a little the following week. That’s okay.

You’re only expectation should be that you will follow the program as best you can.

The rest will take care of itself.

Some of the program’s activities worked their magic at a very deep level.

So while they were very easy to do… their benefits don’t reach the surface straight away.

What I was doing was always working – I just had to be a little patient before I experienced the results.

Getting started was easy…

Christian’s plan was eye-opening and inspiring from the first page to the last.

I had suffered my anxiety disorder for 16 years and in that time I’d read books, countless articles and watched hours of videos about anxiety…

Nobody told me the things that Christian taught me.

He opened my eyes to anxiety disorder and made me understand it so much better than I ever had before.

Of course, the problem with so much exciting new information is this: how on earth do I apply all the stuff I’m learning here?

‘The End of Anxiety’ handles that question very neatly.

First of all, Christian clearly explains the route out of anxiety.

He tells you the what, the why and the how of it all.

Simple explanations, clearly made points, easy to follow logic.

But then Christian offers you a simple start-up guide so that you can quickly make the learning work for you.

You know the quick-start sheet you get with a new phone or a complicated watch? It’s like that.

You want to get started now – not next week – so you need some simple steps you can start following immediately.

His ‘How to get started’ section told me what to do now. Then what to do next. Then what to do after that.

And once I built up my own confidence in what I was doing… I did what I wanted when I wanted to do it.

So long as I regularly did something I knew my anxiety was going to lose this battle.

And it did.

The difference that made the difference

I’m not criticizing the standard medical approaches to the various forms of anxiety.

Drugs, for all their addictive qualities and unpleasant side-effects, do make some difference.

CBT can make a difference too, even if it eventually wears off for many people.

And there are various self-management techniques that help us delay an attack, reduce it – or simply survive it.

But none of these really get to the heart of what’s wrong.

None of these will ever make you better.

One thing I learned from Christian is that anxiety disorders come from a place that can be very deep within us.

It’s not like a cut on your arm or a broken bone – something that can be clearly seen, easily diagnosed and quickly fixed.

Our disorder is hidden. It’s complex, tangled.

The causes of the disorder, the way the disorder affects us, our own thinking about ourselves and our world, and the coping mechanisms we employ to cope with our difficulties…

…all these are layered into the disorder itself, making it a deeper, much less accessible problem.

They feed into each other, creating a spaghetti-like tangle of fears, negative thoughts and distress.

It’s impossible to see where one aspect of our disorders begin and another one starts.

This is where Christian’s program is so different from anything I’d experienced before.

Standard medical remedies mostly address the symptoms – the surface – of the problem.

They get us through the day – which is a vital help – but we remain ill even when we’re managing to function.

Whereas ‘The End of Anxiety’ works very gently on the underlying causes of an anxiety disorder.

It gets to the foundation of the problem… and starts wearing away that foundation.

Instead of drugging me out of my anxiety Christian works on the inside, the source of that anxiety disorder.

And once it starts doing its work then the anxiety’s causes – whatever they are for your type of anxiety – start to subside.

Not because I’d medicated them out of existence but because they had started losing their grip on my life.

They were simply losing their reason to exist.

Quick anxiety relief…

Christian understands anxiety disorders.

Certainly he understands them better than I did. I suspect he knows more about the underlying condition than even my doctors.

After all, he did in weeks what my doctors hadn’t managed to do for me in 16 years.

But he states clearly that this isn’t a quick-fix-cure.

So you can expect to still experience your anxiety for some time – even while following this program. Things will improve. Attacks will become less frequent – and less intense when they do occur.

But while you’re still getting them Christian steps you through an excellent coping strategy that will dramatically reduce the intensity and the duration of the experience.

It was a new coping method for me – I’d never heard of this particular way of getting through an attack.

It helped keep me upright when things got tough. Which meant I was generally in much better condition to continue with the gentle work of melting away my disorder.

I wish I had learnt this years ago! But better late than never, I guess…

How about you?

I don’t know how you’re suffering. You may have a different anxiety disorder to the one I used to have. Or you may simply experience the same disorder in a completely different way.

Either way, I imagine that you’ve reached a point where you just don’t want it any more.

I empathize more than you might imagine. I do know what it’s like.

Anxiety disorder has no upside. It’s a cruel affliction that simply eats away at our happiness and destroys our simple hopes for a peaceful, contented life.

We didn’t earn our anxiety disorder. We don’t deserve what happened to us. It isn’t our fault.

Yet we feel that we’re stuck with it for life, that our anxiety is as much a part of ourselves as an arm or our kidneys.

It turns out though that this simply is not the case.

As nearly a thousand people have now found out… we’re no longer helpless and anxiety doesn’t have to be a life-sentence.

With patience and the right guidance we can gently ease ourselves out of the darkness and into the light.

Christian Goodman’s ‘The End of Anxiety’ is that guidance.

And the moment I decided I wanted to heal and that I was going to take those first tiny steps towards saving myself from a life of anxiety misery… was the single best day of my life.

Because everything that is wonderful in my life now is because of the decision I made then.

How will it be for you?

Well, you have your type of anxiety disorder. You experience it in your own unique way. So your own experience of anxiety is uniquely yours. There’s nobody else quite like you.

Which means your journey to healing might differ in some respects to mine.

The key though is that you get on that path. This is what really matters.

Once I’d decided that enough was enough – I had put myself firmly on that path.

I wanted a different kind of life.

One that was significantly calmer, more predictable, and which freed me to lead the kind of normal existence that so many other people take for granted.

And that’s my reality now.

By following Christian’s advice to the letter you present your anxiety with an irresistible healing force.

Over time, it has no option but to surrender.

Christian’s program is guaranteed

Hundreds of people have successfully used ‘The End of Anxiety’ to successfully treat their anxiety disorders. They followed the guide and allowed improvements to come in their own time.

Their lives now are nothing like their lives were before.

The change to their anxiety disorder – and therefore to their day-to-day happiness – has been quite literally transformative.

There’s no reason why it wouldn’t be exactly the same for you.

Which is why Christian offers you a complete money-back guarantee on his program.

If within 60 days purchasing ‘The End of Anxiety’ you are not completely happy with the changes to your anxiety situation so far… then you can have all your money back. No questions.

Christian makes this guarantee because he’s witnessed so very many people gain life transforming benefits from following his simple plan. Their health and happiness improves as their anxiety recedes into the background.

They are relaxed, calm and in control of their lives. They experience few – or, in most cases, absolutely no – anxiety symptoms.

I wanted to know what it felt like to live my life without an anxiety disorder. I found out. And you can too – click here and get your own copy of ‘The End of Anxiety’…

All anxiety sufferers realize in the end that if we’re going to heal then we are going to have to play an active role in that healing.

If you’ve endured anxiety for any period of time then you already know that it isn’t going to just disappear on its own.

If you do nothing… it’s yours forever.

My anxiety had a cause. Yours does too.

Your anxiety cannot withstand an approach that directly affects that cause.

It cannot resist something that gently dissolves its grip on your happiness.

Christian’s research-backed methods gradually eased anxiety out of my life.

So I know it works.

And Christian guarantees it.

If within 60 days purchasing this program you don’t agree that you’re feeling significantly better than you have done for years then you can have all your money back.

I took Christian up on this same offer a little over 2 years ago. I’m a completely changed person – and I live a much happier, stress-free life.

That can be your story too. Take charge of what’s happening to you… and then watch it change. Get ‘The End of Anxiety’ by clicking here…

There’s no end to where an anxiety disorder can take you.

Over time, a sufferer’s mental health deteriorates. If the condition isn’t addressed head-on, depression becomes significantly more likely.

That’s not all. The condition eventually undermines physical health too.

Ongoing stress – an integral part of anxiety misery – releases stress hormones into the bloodstream.

And ongoing levels of stress hormones in the body lead to inflammation and a host of related physical diseases – with diabetes, kidney and liver disease, heart disease and various immunity malfunctions being the most common.

I wasn’t going to let this happen to me. First my mental health was suffering.

And then my physical health could follow suit.

Enough was enough. I wasn’t going to wait around until my health had deteriorated to the point of no return. I didn’t want that regret hanging over my head.

Once I made my decision to heal… Christian’s program did the rest.

It was easily the best decision I have ever made.

If you’ve read this far then I believe you’ve made your decision too.

You’ve decided you’re not going to suffer like this anymore. You’ve decided you’re going to heal.

Which means you need ‘The End of Anxiety’. Click here and you can have it…

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chronically-something · 7 years

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Life with Multiple Sclerosis ( MS) : World MS Day 2017

Today is World MS Day, a day recognized on the last Wednesday in May in order to raise awareness of Multiple Sclerosis: the people it impacts and the realities we face. Multiple Sclerosis (MS) is a neurodegenerative, autoimmune disease, that affects 2.3 million people worldwide and has no cure. Though the number of treatment options is growing, there is no cure and the majority of treatments do not impact symptoms directly. Every person with MS experiences their own unique set of symptoms and challenges, making treatment plans complicated and individualistic.

Multiple Sclerosis Defined:

mul·ti·ple scle·ro·sis ˈməltəpəl ˌskləˈrōsəs/ noun a chronic, typically progressive disease involving damage to the sheaths of nerve cells in the brain and spinal cord, whose symptoms may include numbness, impairment of speech and of muscular coordination, blurred vision, and severe fatigue.

This year’s World MS Day theme is “Life with MS”. What is life with MS? what does that technical stuff I just wrote really mean? How do those words above translate to the day to day life of someone with the disease? Honestly? It’s hard to say what ‘Life with MS’ really means. It’s different for everyone. MS is sometimes referred to as a snowflake disease for that very reason. No one experiences MS in the same way. Some people never get optic neuritis and others feel plagued by it. It’s individual.

That said, the list of symptoms your body has to play with is long and frustrating and their manifestation is as unpredictable as the course of any one person’s disease.

Symptoms of Multiple Sclerosis (Via The National MS Society) :

Fatigue – Occurs in about 80% of people, can significantly interfere with the ability to function at home and work, and may be the most prominent symptom in a person who otherwise has minimal activity limitations.

Walking (Gait) Difficulties – Related to several factors including weakness, spasticity, loss of balance, sensory deficit and fatigue, and can be helped by physical therapy, assistivetherapy and medications.

Numbness or Tingling – Numbness of the face, body, or extremities (arms and legs) is often the first symptom experienced by those eventually diagnosed as having MS.

Spasticity – Refers to feelings of stiffness and a wide range of involuntary muscle spasms; can occur in any limb, but it is much more common in the legs.

Weakness – Weakness in MS, which results from deconditioning of unused muscles or damage to nerves that stimulate muscles, can be managed with rehabilitation strategies and the use of mobility aids and other assistive devices.

Vision Problems – The first symptom of MS for many people. Onset of blurred vision, poor contrast or color vision, and pain on eye movement can be frightening — and should be evaluated promptly.

Dizziness and Vertigo – People with MS may feel off balance or lightheaded, or — much less often — have the sensation that they or their surroundings are spinning (vertigo).

Bladder Problems – Bladder dysfunction, which occurs in at least 80% of people with MS, can usually be managed quite successfully with medications, fluid management, and intermittent self-catheterization.

Sexual Problems – Very common in the general population including people with MS. Sexual responses can be affected by damage in the central nervous system, as well by symptoms such as fatigue and spasticity, and by psychological factors.

Bowel Problems – Constipation is a particular concern among people with MS, as is loss of control of the bowels. Bowel issues can typically be managed through diet, adequate fluid intake, physical activity and medication.

Pain – Pain syndromes are common in MS. In one study, 55% of people with MS had “clinically significant pain” at some time, and almost half had chronic pain.

Cognitive Changes – Refers to a range of high-level brain functions affected in more than 50% of people with MS, including the ability to process incoming information, learn and remember new information, organize and problem-solve, focus attention and accurately perceive the environment.

Emotional Changes – Can be a reaction to the stresses of living with MS as well as the result of neurologic and immune changes. Significant depression, mood swings, irritability, and episodes of uncontrollable laughing and crying pose significant challenges for people with MS and their families.

Depression – Studies have suggested that clinical depression — the severest form of depression — is among the most common symptoms of MS. It is more common among people with MS than it is in the general population or in persons with many other chronic, disabling conditions.

Speech Problems – Speech problems, including slurring (dysarthria) and loss of volume (dysphonia) occur in approximately 25-40% of people with MS, particularly later in the disease course and during periods of extreme fatigue. Stuttering is occasionally reported as well.

Swallowing Problems Swallowing problems — referred to as dysphagia — result from damage to the nerves controlling the many small muscles in the mouth and throat.

Tremor– or uncontrollable shaking, can occur in various parts of the body because of damaged areas along the complex nerve pathways that are responsible for coordination of movements.

Seizures – which are the result of abnormal electrical discharges in an injured or scarred area of the brain — have been estimated to occur in 2-5% people with MS, compared to the estimated 3% of the general population.

Breathing Problems Respiration problems occur in people whose chest muscles have been severely weakened by damage to the nerves that control those muscles.

Itching Pruritis (itching) is one of the family of abnormal sensations — such as “pins and needles” and burning, stabbing or tearing pains — which may be experienced by people with MS.

Headache Although a headache is not a common symptom of MS, some reports suggest that people with MS have an increased incidence of certain types of headache

Hearing Loss About 6% of people who have MS complain of impaired hearing. In very rare cases, hearing loss has been reported as the first symptom of the disease.

That’s a lot of stuff, but it doesn’t really explain life with MS, does it? Lets put it this way: MS is a like a demon laying in wait. It will take any opportunity to present itself, do a number on your body and leave you worse off for it, how much worse depends on the type of MS you have and well… what the universe decides that day. Some of the damage is permanent and some go away and come back at random. A daily game of Russian Roulette is a decent metaphor too.

I can never truly explain what Life with MS means. What I can do is SHOW you what one fairly ‘normal’ day with MS is, or was, for me.

On May 25, 2016, I decided to document every time I found myself struggling with MS throughout my day. I signified these moments with a photograph and the placement of an MS awareness sticker provided by Shift.ms (an amazing organization!). This is the outcome.

The Context:

Environment (weather) often contributes to worsening MS symptoms so It’s important I tell you the day was hot as hell, super humid, and generally what those of us with multiple sclerosis would consider a flare inspiring day. I had no food for my tortoise and I since I have yet to discover how to control the weather, I went about my day despite the heat, in the careful and cautious way you do when you aren’t feeling right and don’t want to draw the attention of the MS demons lying in wait.

(Video & Slide Show to come)

Each of these photos captured a moment where I found myself struggling with symptoms (new, heat inspired, and those that are permanent fixtures in my life) and issues created by multiple sclerosis. These symptoms and struggles are typical to a day in my #LifeWithMS.

Every day brings new and old challenges to the forefront that I stop and deal with and move forward. That is the key.

After 7 years I can’t say the fight is getting easier, I can’t pretend I’m used to it or forget about it or found its purpose in my life. Life with MS still sucks and I’m betting it always will. I can say, however, that I’ve learned a thing or two about dealing with the day to day, about myself and how to cope. With that in mind, I’ll offer you a tip on how to deal with #lifewithMS.

Know that you are moving forward.

People often talk about keeping positive, smiling through the pain, chin up and all that. I sometimes feel the real message is lost in those statements. My tip for anyone struggling with MS, or any disease like, it is to remember you’re moving forward. No matter what, you are. It’s a fact. Time moves on and you’re going with it. So remember to feel your feelings, anger, pain, frustration and sadness are all parts of our reality, but so are joy, happiness, gratitude and love.

Keeping positive is never forgetting that you are moving forward while experiencing any or all of the aforementioned emotions. You don’t have to smile all the time, you don’t have to claim everything is fine, you just have to know that in the end, you’re moving forward and tomorrow is another day. That’s the tip:

Feel, Deal, and Move Forward.

You’re winning because you’re living even when it feels like you’re moving backward with every breath. It’s an abstract thought that might seem someone useless but if you let it live in the back of your mind it might just help you through those particularly terrible moments. I might also add, as I learned from this photo project, take the time to look at a day in your life, all the moments MS tried to stop you from moving forward, and be proud of yourself. You moved forward and MS couldn’t do anything about it.

Then give yourself a high five. You earned it.

ETA: The video describing the symptoms associated with each photo.

youtube

#Life With MS #Multiple Sclerosis #spoonie #multiple sclerosis awareness #advice #World MS day #Chronic Illness

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salina4321 · 6 years

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Laziness Does Not Exist – Devon Price – Medium

I don’t think laziness was ever at fault.

Ever.

In fact, I don’t believe that laziness exists.

…

I’m a social psychologist, so I’m interested primarily in the situational and contextual factors that drive human behavior. When you’re seeking to predict or explain a person’s actions, looking at the social norms, and the person’s context is usually a pretty safe bet. Situational constraints typically predict behavior far better than personality, intelligence, or other individual-level traits.

There are always barriers. Recognizing those barriers— and viewing them as legitimate — is often the first step to breaking “lazy” behavior patterns.

…

It’s really helpful to respond to a person’s ineffective behavior with curiosity rather than judgment. I learned this from a friend of mine, the writer and activist Kimberly Longhofer (who publishes under Mik Everett). Kim is passionate about the acceptance and accommodation of disabled people and homeless people. Their writing about both subjects is some of the most illuminating, bias-busting work I’ve ever encountered. Part of that is because Kim is brilliant, but it’s also because, at various points in their life, Kim has been both disabled and homeless.

In that chronically uncomfortable, over-stimulating context, needing a drink or some cigarettes makes fucking sense. As Kim explained to me if you’re laying out in the freezing cold, drinking some alcohol may be the only way to warm up and get to sleep. If you’re under-nourished, a few clouds of smoke may be the only thing that kills the hunger pangs. And if you’re dealing with all this while also fighting an addiction, then yes, sometimes you just need to score whatever will make the withdrawal symptoms go away, so you can survive.

Kim’s incredible book about their experiences being homeless while running a bookstore.

But they’re already doing the best they can. I’ve known homeless people who worked full-time jobs, and who devoted themselves to the care of other people in their communities. A lot of homeless people have to navigate bureaucracies constantly, interfacing with social workers, caseworkers, police officers, shelter staff, Medicaid staff, and a slew of charities both well-meaning and condescending. It’s a lot of fucking work to be homeless. And when a homeless or poor person runs out of steam and makes a “bad decision”, there’s a damn good reason for it.

…

Let’s look at a sign of academic “laziness” that I believe is anything but procrastination.

People love to blame procrastinators for their behavior. Putting off work sure looks lazy, to an untrained eye. Even the people who are actively doing the procrastinating can mistake their behavior for laziness. You’re supposed to be doing something, and you’re not doing it — that’s a moral failure, right? That means you’re weak-willed, unmotivated, and lazy, doesn’t it?

When you’re paralyzed with fear of failure, or you don’t even know how to begin a massive, complicated undertaking, it’s damn hard to get shit done. It has nothing to do with desire, motivation, or moral upstandingness. Procrastinators can themselves to work for hours; they can sit in front of a blank word document, doing nothing else, and torture themselves; they can pile on the guilt again and again — none of it makes initiating the task any easier. In fact, their desire to get the damn thing done may worsen their stress and make starting the task harder.

Needing or benefiting from such things doesn’t make a person lazy. It just means they have needs. The more we embrace that, the more we can help people thrive.

…

I had a student who was skipping class. Sometimes I’d see her lingering near the building, right before class was about to start, looking tired. The class would start, and she wouldn’t show up. When she was present in class, she was a bit withdrawn; she sat in the back of the room, eyes down, energy low. She contributed during small group work but never talked during larger class discussions.

But my class had a unit on mental health stigma. It’s a passion of mine because I’m a neuroatypical psychologist. I know how unfair my field is to people like me. The class & I talked about the unfair judgments people levy against those with mental illness; how depression is interpreted as laziness, how mood swings are framed as manipulative, how people with “severe” mental illnesses are assumed incompetent or dangerous.

…

Over the years, at that same school, I encountered countless other students who were under-estimated because the barriers in their lives were not seen as legitimate. There was the young man with OCD who always came to class late because his compulsions sometimes left him stuck in place for a few moments. There was the survivor of an abusive relationship, who was processing her trauma in therapy appointments right before my class each week. There was the young woman who had been assaulted by a peer — and who had to continue attending classes with that peer, while the school was investigating the case.

These students all came to me willingly and shared what was bothering them. Because I discussed mental illness, trauma, and stigma in my class, they knew I would be understanding. And with some accommodations, they blossomed academically. They gained confidence, made attempts at assignments that intimidated them, raised their grades, started considering graduate school and internships. I always found myself admiring them. When I was a college student, I was nowhere near as self-aware. I hadn’t even begun my lifelong project of learning to ask for help.

…

It’s morally repugnant to me that any educator would be so hostile to the people they are supposed to serve. It’s especially infuriating, that the person enacting this terror was a psychologist. The injustice and ignorance of it leave me teary every time I discuss it. It’s a common attitude in many educational circles, but no student deserves to encounter it.

…

Maybe you weren’t always able to look at human behavior this way. That’s okay. Now you are. Give it a try.

Get over that wall!

…

If you found this essay illuminating at all, please consider buying Kim Longhofer / Mik Everett’s book, Self-Published Kindling: Memoirs of a Homeless Bookstore Owner. The ebook is $3; the paperback is $15.

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allenmendezsr · 4 years

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