#and rn i can feel the fast thoughts causing tension in my body I’m so tired and achey I’m gonna crash ik it

[rowanhoney]

permanently overwhelmed 🫶

[broodsys]

for my new dwarven inquisitor, Asoq

What is your characters response to fear? (Happiness? Despair?)

Fear: She gets angry and aggressive. She’s used to fighting so that’s her go-to response. Fade spiders? She’ll fuck them up.

Happiness: Very loud, boisterous. I imagine the Carta is kinda... bold in their play, too, so she keeps that going.

Despair: Isolation! She’s not used to leaning on others so she doesn’t want anyone to see her being “weak”

How often does your character cry?

Never. She might cry in private over a huge, sudden loss, or as part of a breakdown that was building up for a long time, but really... never. See above re: “weakness”

What causes your character to make bad decisions?

Peer pressure, measuring up, and impulse. She’s the type who will do any dare. She’s not too impulsive during serious or dangerous situations, but she can be very impulsive in her day-to-day life and interpersonal relationships. She tries to not take anything too seriously and that sometimes backfires real bad.

What is your character's first reaction to hearing a baby crying?

Ew. Get it away. Annoyance.

What is your character's bedtime ritual? Their morning ritual?

Uhhh bedtime has usually been drop into whatever bed she has available and close her eyes and hope she doesn’t get woken up by a fight breaking out. During DAI it changes a bit, but she tends to only be in her tent/room to sleep. Probably not the best at personal hygiene but that changes a little when she has regular access to it. Morning is similar, and she tends to wake up alert. Has nightmares sometimes that wake her up, too, and then she usually won’t go back to sleep.

Are there any foods that your character hates but eats anyway?

She’d eat anything, mostly stemming from not having the luxury of choice, but she’s not big on anything raw. Less an actual opinion and more an association - having hot, cooked meals is kinda a luxury, so she gets really excited by that. Obviously she wasn’t out there stuffing raw meat in her face, but she did have to eat a lot of raw fruit and veg and nuts and stuff. It got old really fast.

How strongly does your character identify with their gender(s)?

Barely at all. If pressed in modern times, she’d probably ID as nonbinary or some kind of genderfuck, but rn she’s comfortable embracing both masculine and feminine aspects and doesn’t give it a lot of thought. Getting mocked for it doesn’t phase her at all. Her reaction to that kinda stuff is very “why the fuck do you care, rando.”

When did your character figure out their sexuality?

It’s not so much “figure out” as “willing to have lots of fun when the opportunity is there.” Again, it’s not something she’s really sat down and considered, instead just going with the flow. Again, if pressed during modern day, she’d probably ID as pan or bi, but rn it’s just all about having fun and whoever strikes her fancy. Or sometimes not even striking her fancy but just a useful way to get off/deal with tension.

Is your character ever surprised when they see themselves in the mirror?

Pre-DAI, only sometimes. Usually when something was different - got beat up, new haircut, etc. Part of that is that, again, she didn’t exactly have consistent access to mirrors. During DAI she gets startled by her reflection all the time because she looks so different - the mark on her hand particularly startles her, and she takes pains to hide it because the glow distracts her and makes her feel kinda nauseous. It’s not a reaction to the light or anything but stems from a sense of having her autonomy overriden and her body violated in a really fundamental way. The glow gives her nightmares. Oh, wait, just remembered that dwarves aren’t supposed to dream... but I still think the mark and being in the Fade could very well unlock that capability, so I’m sticking with it. But she also gets surprised at how clean and polished she looks during DAI. She’s used to roughing it and wearing whatever until it falls apart - here, she has access to wash basins and clean, high-end clothing every single day. It’s weird.

[4dtk]

hiiiii! congratulations on reaching 2.5k followers💖 can i request mark lee🖤dom mark lee enemies to lovers - where y/n keeps testing his patience, so he gives her what she wants. and for the prompt: “is this what you wanted?” thank you, and congratulations once again, you’re so talented:’)and i hope my request makes sense ksndsksk thank youuuuu

thank you <3, enjoy!!

warnings: e2l!au, ceo!mark, dom!mark, sub!reader, cunnilingus/eating out, semi-public sex, oral (f receiving, m briefly), blowjob (brief) clit stimulation, vaginal penetration, doggy on table, facial, N//SFW UNDER THE CUT, irl p*rn at the end!

“you’re so infuriating! why the hell are you here, anyway? did you come to apologise? i swear if—“ you dig a hand into your hair, pulling at your locks that’s sure to remove a few strands later on. you’ve done this countless times, though, that mark’s used to it. even when he’s the problem, he just looks on uninterested, hands tucked into the pants of his trousers.

“i didn’t, (y/n), you need to stop blaming everything on me.”

“like the stocks plummeting? or the pitch that you oh-so-accidentally interrupted?” you sigh, leaning against the table of the office that’s dark and deserted. from the door right up to the window was a plethora of desks left empty, with workers sent home early while you’re left to clean up the mess that mark as a CEO, caused. you just aren’t sure if that was what he set out to do in the first place, replacing the previous CEO easily with a skillset that you envied.

“they aren’t even coming back tomorrow for a second meeting, and they were looking disinterested anyway…” you groan, muttering out a whatever before walking away from the other as you ignore the growing tension in the room. a part of you never wanted to admit that the tension went further than just emotions, always having to calm your body down after butting heads with such a stubborn CEO.

mark pulls on your hand, “where do you think you’re going?” your brows furrow and the skin where he touches is blazing hot, but you’d die before you’d admit that to him, doing the littlest to remove your wrist from his grasp. raising his brow, your efforts show through that you want anything but to escape, loving the way your mouth drops open in small, needy pants as he brings your body right up to his.

“w-what do you mean, mr. lee?” you mumble, hands placed awkwardly on his chest while you try not to show how his body heat affects you.

“i’m not mr. lee, here in front of you. call me by my name,” mark says quietly, fingers delicately brushing away strands of your hair while the other plays with your clothes nonchalantly, from your buttons to the lapels of your blazer, every touch was burning, even if it wasn’t direct contact with your skin.

“what, do you mean… mark?” the first name sounds weird coming from your mouth, but you had no right to feel that way considering you were shouting at your boss just earlier. the other only smirks at you, hands travelling right up your tight pencil skirt, pleasantly shocked when he finds you wearing a thong.

“you wanted this, didn’t you? getting on my fuckin’ nerves, blaming shit on me you don’t know a thing about,” mark presses his palm snugly against your cunt, barely covered by the fabric that he can feel it pulsing below him.

mark has no problem moving your thong to the side, a dark patch forming at the back of your skirt before he harshly kneels down to latch his mouth onto your clit. it happens so fast that you squeal, but you make no move to push him away “you’re just as sweet as i imagined,” mark moans, lapping at your clit repeatedly while he toyed with your hole, “this what you thought of? your boss on his knees?”

“n-no— shit, m-mark!” your reply is ignored when you try to answer, the other pressing his face deeper into your cunt to devour all of you. quickly, his tongue flicks your clit and switches to your hole instantly, sloppily slurping up your juices. his hold on your thighs is harsh, each grip filled with hatred and lust and something else mark couldn’t place a finger on.

when you look down, you see anything but the blind rage you were in earlier, entranced by how different the mark in front of you looks. he turns his face so many times you’ve lost count, getting deeper and deeper into your sex that all you hear are muffled words and moans.

“’m close, mark, ’m—” you’re certain to reach your high with how vigorously mark seems to be eating you out, pulling on that oh so familiar knot in you that the moment it stops, much to your chagrin, you’re giving him a disapproving look. he gets back to his full height, looming over you while his lips shine with your arousal. “hey! what the fuck?”

mark only raises a brow, “is that any way to speak to your boss?”

“you just stopped your— whatever you were doing,” it was clear you’re flustered, legs spread while your hair sticks to your face, “is this just another game of yours?”

mark scoffs, looking you right in the eyes as he unbuckles his belt without any effort, and you wonder if he’s had other women under him. in the same exact position, in the same exact state where he stares you down. you hold a gasp back when he removes his underwear, cock held in his hand as he gives it a few strokes.

“you’re so b-big,” you whisper more to yourself than to him, wondering if it was that stupid desk that always hid his lower half. you didn’t know he was packing, heck, you didn’t even know he had room in him to give you anything but hell. “is that even gonna fit?”

mark smiles, “we’ll make it fit, baby. can you turn around for me like a good girl? place your perfect tits against the table.” excitement replaces your initial anger, driven by how your pussy throbs for him and the orders get to you. you recognise how his voice drops a notch, peeling yourself off the table to display yourself for him.

the other groans as he collects your slick, euphoria possessing him for just a moment as he sinks in. mark’s grip on your waist hurts, but it’s countered by how he fills you up bit by bit. gradually, his hips meet yours, your squelching pussy decorating the room along with your moans.

“didn’t know you were so t-tight, shit, princess,” mark whispers, hand travelling up the expanse of your back to hold onto your neck. there, he pulls, causing your back to arch while your elbows weakly support you. “i might c-cum before i even know it. is this what you wanted?”

you have pride, unable to admit it right to him, but how your body reacts tells him everything he needs to know. grasping at the table was all you could do for now, “y-yes, i wanted you to ruin me, mark. all those stupid fucking— ahh- arguments,” squeezing your eyes shut, you give up on explanations. “p-please fuck me, mark. use me,” you submit to him fully, trying your best to turn back to him, “make me yours, please.”

mark groans at your confession, because if you let go, so could he. he swiftly wraps a hand around your wrists so he could pull on your, treating your body just like a doll that he could fuck into. the slapping of skin resonates off the deserted office as he drives his dick into you, your body incredibly trapped between his and the table.

“you don’t know what you d-do to me, darling.” he voices out, letting go of your arms in favour of your shoulders. your arch makes his breath hitch, under him so beautifully that he just has to taste you. “you’re so fucking exasperating yet tempting. like the devil, you.”

he says in between kisses, not missing the way your body shivers every few seconds. mark knows you’re close just like you were earlier, smiling that he recognises your mannerisms so easily. “close? you close? i can feel you clenching around my cock, love.”

“y-yeah, i’m close—” you moan out, mouth trying to savour the lips he insults you and curses at you with, but here you are at his mercy, in the very office you swore you’d quit from. with all your overwhelming sensations, the uneasy feeling in your stomach grows and grows, finally snapping when his hand brushes over your clit. “mark— mark, mark, p-pleaase!” accident or not, you’re chasing more of it as you reach down to rub yourself. your back hurts, your legs ache, but nothing feels better than the ecstasy you’re feeling as you reach your high.

mark continues to pound into your sensitive cunt, spilling profanities into your ears that he was close as well. you have no time to mull over the sudden emptiness you feel, forced down onto the floor as he shoves his cock into your face. the tip is red, threatening to spill. with one kitten lick to it, mark throws his head back, spilling all over your face. he shoots his load with the help of your hand, which you replace soon with your mouth to allow him to ride out his high. “good girl, taking all my cum on your face.”

with big doe eyes, you look up at him innocently, mouth slowing to a stop while you lean into the hand that caresses your cheek. with a heaving chest, you take a breather against his softening cock, skin around your mouth littered with drool and cum.

“didn’t peg you for such a cumslut. maybe you’ll let me fuck you in front of our business partners next time?”

you place a kiss to his tip that only twitches, “that is, if we still have ’em.”

mark laughs, his title as the CEO wavering with the company that’s starting to fail. but he thinks as long as he has you, he’s sure to pick himself up from the bottom again. oh, and now he’s got an obedient little whore to fuck, too, which is a position you’re very happy to take.

<3 how he pounds you in the office (irl p*rn, please don’t click unless you’re comfortable!)

EVENT CLOSED (thank you!)

[hopefullystillatheatrestudent]

this might be a weird thought but the way jensen performs masculinity (and i KNOW it’s a performance cause like, have you SEEN the mockumentary?) is just.... so inherently queer to me lmao

ok. okokokokokok. you asked for this. i have a LOT of thoughts on this. it’s gonna be under a cut because i’m gonna be annoying and psychoanalyse a celebrity i’ve never met(and hope i never do) but trust and believe when i tell you i know what i’m talking about so

you want my opinion? here goes. there is absolutely no way jensen ackles is straight. i hear you, ‘how do you know that he’s bi? that’s invasive and creepy’ but may i counter that point by saying how do you know he’s straight???? why is the default for everyone heterosexual? that’s a toxic mentality to have; ‘oh you don’t know for sure so just treat him like he’s 100% straight just in case’ like....what? heteronormativity drives me wild i’m sorry

and also, um, just to, um, prove my point that this man is decidedly not straight™(i really don’t want to do this but like it has to be said) we KNOW he’s not straight because his d*ck has spoken for itself around misha, like, four times. I HATE SAYING IT!!!!!!! but, um, straight men don’t get aroused by men. ...do i really need to explain myself further???? that’s what i thought(and don’t give me the ‘it could have been for unrelated reasons’ or ‘that wasn’t a boner!’ crap because um good lord yes it was and misha caused every single one so no it wasn’t a coincidence i’m gonna move on before i collapse into myself like a dying star)

anyway, on to the topic at hand which is jensen and his performative masculinity. and it’s a juicy one.

after the unconscious amount of hours i’ve put into watching and subconsciously judging jackles, i have come to the conclusion that like, 90% of how he presents himself and talks and even moves is an act. it’s a facade. it’s a shield. he is not that person. it actually seems exhausting, because he tries to compose himself in this macho, manly, confident and effortlessly cool way, but he’s not that person he desperately wishes he was and wants to be perceived as. he’s on guard every second, even the slightest tilt of his head is like, pre-meditated in some way? if i’m going FULL body language analyst mode, i’ve noticed he has a certain posture he always shifts himself into, and it’s very ‘pursed lips, stoic faced, gruff voiced, square-shoulder, broad and manly’ but, not to be rude jensen, it kind of reads as a little kid imitating the adults he thinks are cool? oof i am going IN huh(it’s out of love though i promise)

he is trying to be this person at every second:

because that’s who he wishes he was, because that’s how he gets validation from the people around him that he looks up to; straight white guys. but to me, who he presents himself to be at conventions is just as much of a performance as this whole eye of the tiger bit is.

oh i should mention i know his body language isn’t naturally like that because how he naturally carries himself is actually pretty flamboyant? like he seriously must be toning himself down HARD

examples:

there’s no tension in his body here as opposed to the eye of the tiger gif. i’d describe it as...generally loose and free? he’s at ease when he moves like that and you can see it.

oh and dude!!! DUDE!!!! how could i not mention the fucking SPECTACLE that is his voice??? jensen. i watched season one. i know where your voice naturally sits. THAT IS NOT WHAT YOU SOUND LIKE. and there have been so many accounts of fans visiting jensen in his trailer and being surprised that his real voice is two octaves higher. again, his performance of masculinity is all encompassing. he can’t even talk normally because, in his mind, that’s a chink in his armour.

and, like you said, anon, this whole smokes-and-mirrors gong show of ‘i am the cool texan man’ is inherently queer. who are you trying to impress??? guys??? that’s pretty gay dude.(btw: gay[honorary])

i feel like i’ve already read this man for filth but i have to keep going bc i have so much to say

ok next thing i’m gonna talk about is how jensen says one thing but everything else about him tells us the exact opposite. another HUGE element of performative masculinity, ONE THAT DEAN WINCHESTER IS A MASTER OF. have i mentioned how dean and jensen are like mirrors of each other when it comes to their sexuality and queer identity??? because it is fascinating how everything i say about jensen also directly applies to dean.

allow me to introduce the grumpy face™. as in, the face he glues on when he’s enjoying doing something but doesn’t want to let anyone know it. and it’s ALWAYS when he’s doing something that could be seen as unmanly in any way. (and when i say manly i mean the ‘ideal’ version of manhood that doesn’t really exist but that jensen seems to be striving for[and dean too])

prime example is this video he did with daneel. the grumpy face™ doesn’t budge the whole time as he’s like,,,,playing an instrument and acting like he doesn’t want to bc i guess that’s too girly??? but i also find this video fascinating because the joke IN it is kind of that they’re both poking fun at him for being so insecure about playing a freaking flute. because, i mean, he gets into it, but he wants you to think he is not.

also this picture.

what is this. i hate them. jensen is smushing himself into misha’s forehead but noooo his face is telling us ‘i hate this’ because CLEARLY he does. also misha’s so happy ew gross

he does that face in photo ops with misha ALL THE TIME but how many times has he also literally asked the con goers if he can also have those photos on his phone too? because of course he actually loves touching misha and is actually a sentimental fool but he tries so hard to hide it and fails so spectacularly.

oh and this. and of COURSE this. actually let’s talk about the hitch kiss for a hot minute because it’s a perfect example of exactly what i’m talking about

(he is so transparent guys. he tries so hard but he’s so obvious.)

1. misha was never supposed to be onstage with him. so it’s a boldface LIE and OBVIOUS PLOY TO GET MISHA TO KISS HIM when he says ‘they’d like us to make out now’. but of course the way he says it is ‘oh my god can you believe what these crazy panel people are making us do haha but i mean what they say goes amirite’. same energy as ‘oh my god did you just dare us to kiss rn???’ ‘....no i didn’t’ ‘oh my god i can’t believe you’d ask that haha but i can’t say no to a dare lol’ it’s the SAME THING

2. the fact that he was in the worst mood before misha came onstage and FAKE KISSING HIM made him feel...SO?? much better? like not just a little better a lot better like, again, that says a lot, because if they weren’t dating he would not be in a better mood if misha kissed his cheek unprompted. bc that cheek kiss wasn’t a joke it was a genuine sign of affection and AHHHH

3. after the kiss happens. you know, the one that jensen actively leans into and is smiling like an idiot the whole time through and is quite clearly having the time of his life during....he says ‘well, that was uncomfortable’. .......my guy. um. i don’t know how to tell you that i do in fact have eyes and you are NOT pulling the fast one you think you are

like i’m so sorry jensen but i have you pegged. it’s literally no use.

god there’s so many instances of him doing this with misha specifically. the whole ‘ew gross lol’ but then everything about him tells us the exact opposite. like this(i hate this. how dare he say ‘he has though, hasn’t he?’ LIKE THAT?????)

so yeah my point with that is he really wants us to think he is one thing when he is the antithesis of what he’s trying to be. he really likes those things that he talks down about, and everything he’s loudly projecting is all to hide how he really feels. he went to a gay bar with daneel, for crying out loud. he wants to play a role in drag. he’s queer and he likes it. pov: you’re jensen ackles train of thought: ‘ok so i really like this thing that people might make fun of me for or call me gay for liking so if i just say ‘lol as if’ and make a grossed-out face they will be FOOLED. i am a genius. hey misha wanna blow on my ear lol i meAN GROSS EW’

i have two more things i want to talk about when it comes to this topic so PLEASE bear with me anon this is why you took so long to answer clearly lmao

ok so we’re now going to go over my favorite hot take of all time. which is ‘how do we know dean’s performing masculinity? because sam isn’t.’ only replace dean with jensen and sam with jared and oh my god do we ever have a case

jared is as STRAIGHT as they come. he is secure in that knowledge. and that’s why he is perfectly comfortable treating misha like this:

and not try to scream ‘i am not enjoying doing this!!!!!!’ at us. because he doesn’t care what we think of his sexuality like jensen does(because he has nothing to hide whereas jensen DOES)

something i found the other day that no one has brought up but i SCREAMED upon finding it is this one clip THAT I CAN’T FIND OH GOD but i promise i’m not making it up. i can’t believe i can’t find it guys it is gold. i need need NEED to talk about it. and if anyone knows what i’m referencing and can apply links in any way i will love you forever but here’s what happens off the top of my head:

ok so i’m a bit too braindead to explain it perfectly but um basically it’s a j2 panel and someone brings up magic mike and i think jared says ‘yeah i didn’t watch it’ and then jensen says ‘all the way through’. stupid joke. whatever. the joke is that jared is gay for watching magic mike.

and then i literally kid you not. jared gets this like ‘jesus christ ok dude? lol’ look on his face and then goes ‘projecting much, mr. ackles?’ and jensen gets a guilty look on his face and walks away. and jared did not say it as a joke. he was being dead pan and earnest. and jensen knew it too, he knew he was projecting. i wish i could show you guys the clip i promise if i ever find it i’ll link it but IS THAT NOT SO DAMNING FOR JENSEN????? like come ON. also proves my point that when you compare how they feel about watching magic mike. jared doesn’t care bc watching it just doesn’t interest him, but he also thinks that just watching it in itself doesn’t make you gay. jensen however.......has a different mindset, clearly.

‘projecting much, mr. ackles?’ is actually a great title for my next and FINAL section(we’re almost there folks) which is how jensen projects his insecurites about his own sexuality and relationship with misha onto misha.

i hope by now we’ve all seen this video of jensen impersonating cas. it is a blatant microaggression on his part. and like obviously homophobic. it’s like in his mind if he makes fun of them for being gay it makes them both less gay somehow??? it’s self-deprecation in a way??? let’s just tell it like it is: that impression was just jensen’s overt internalized homophobia rearing it’s ugly head. he does it a LOT too when it comes to misha.

i mean:

and that whole mess where he’s making fun of misha for being a bottom in their panel in 2016? ‘so you’re saying, like with football terms, there’s a handler and there’s a receiver heheheehe’ jensen you’re not exempt from being gay just because you know football terms lmao

oh and his OTHER impression of misha where he mocks him for...bicycling...because it’s not a manly enough sport??? jensen NO ONE else has ever thought this hard in their lives about what constitutes as masculine enough to be a sport before. that’s all you bud. we don’t find those jokes nearly as funny as you do. you are reaching, sir

the good news is that misha thinks it’s hilarious and knows it’s projecting on jensen’s part and will tease him endlessly for it. many stories come to mind, like that one photo op story where they’re literally dressed in rainbow banners and pride stickers but when misha goes to hold his hand jensen said something like ‘no way’ and then misha stepped back, put his hands on his hips and went ‘that’s the part that’s too gay for you???’ and jensen LOST it

or when that whole underwear thing happened(messy messY MESSY BTW) and then a fan asked a question about what dean and cas would do in rome and misha just said ‘when in rome’ and jensen makes a face like ‘are you serious’ and then misha says ‘you can’t look at me like that anymore, because of what you did!!!!!!’

OH and that whole story about when misha suggested they put jensen in the closet for that cat video....yeah um

and then when jensen was asked to do bisexual finger guns for a photo op and the con goer said ‘he looks bisexual here’ and misha literally said ‘oh he definitely looks bisexual here. i would say he’s actually closer to the gay side of the spectrum’ so..um...make with that as you will

OH MY GOD i’m finally done. wow. WOW. that was a lot. i hope i’ve blown your minds. ty anon i really wanted to talk about this and i hope you’re happy with the outcome!!!!!!

[ragingbookdragon]

To Fluster Or Not To Fluster? That Is The Question

Muriel x M!Apprentice

Word Count: 1.5K Warnings: Explicit Language

Author’s Note: Since apparently half the Arcana fandom is losing their goddamn minds rn, how about we take a moment to chill and read a funny fic? Yeah? Enjoy! -Thorne

           He was a terrible person. He was an absolutely terrible person and was probably going down in history as the most terrible person to ever have lived. Well, besides Lucio that is. Of course, the level of terribleness between him and Lucio was about the size of an ocean—Lucio was a selfish prick, and while he couldn’t say that sometimes he wasn’t one, he was usually just a jackass. All things considered, he was still going down in history as a terrible person solely because at every chance he got, he flustered Muriel however he could. He couldn’t help it—it was just too easy.

***

           Muriel was content to let (Y/N) do the talking and greeting. While he’d certainly gotten somewhat used to being in public and a bit more comfortable around people he didn’t know, he was still reserved in his words. That being said, it didn’t bother (Y/N) to talk for him; it gave him a pride to know that Muriel trusted him enough to do so.

           He passed the merchant a few coins then turned to the man beside him and smiled. “Anything else you want Muriel?” Another thing (Y/N) was proud of—Muriel had finally gotten used to asking for things, wanting things, most importantly, knowing that he deserved them all.

           “I need a new pair of gloves,” Muriel murmured, digging around in his pocket to reveal a pair of worn, but well-loved gloves.

           (Y/N) nodded and took his hand, tugging him around to one of the stalls in the marketplace that was selling a collection of assorted garments. He craned his neck looking for the stall keeper, but none was around, then he caught sight of a little sign on the top of the stall. Be right back!

           “Stall keep isn’t here Muriel, but I don’t think they’ll mind if we look around.” (Y/N) looked at him and then tipped his head to the stall. “See any you like so far?”

           He watched as Muriel stepped up, silently gazing at the selection. He reached over, and neatly shifted them around until he found a pair, a dark forest green with golden embroidery on the back. He flipped them over and examined the leather patches on the palm and fingers. After a moment of observation, he met (Y/N)’s eyes.

           “I like these ones,” he quietly stated and (Y/N) nodded at them.

           “Try ‘em on and see if they fit.” He did so and smiled softly.

           “They do.”

           Muriel started to take them off and (Y/N) reached out. “Wait a second Muriel, put the ends of your palms together and make a ‘V’.”

           He did so, albeit with confusion etched across his face, then looked at him. “What now?” (Y/N) smirked and leaned forward, propping his chin at the base of Muriel’s hands, cheeks pressed comfortably between his lover’s palms.

           “Just as I thought,” he announced all knowingly. “They’re the perfect face cradling size.”

           Muriel’s mouth snapped shut quicker than he’d ever seen it, and he watched as pink bloomed across his cheeks. Just as (Y/N) started to snicker, he pulled away and spun on his heel, marching off in the other direction.

           “Nevermind! I don’t need any gloves!”

           (Y/N) cackled as he tossed a coin purse onto the table and hurried after him. “Wait for me Muriel! We need to see if they’re the perfect size for handholding too! Muriel wait—how are you moving so fast?!”

***

           “Is this even?”

           (Y/N) glanced up from the magic tome Asra had lent him and peered at Muriel who had his back turned to him. He’d been adjusting the tapestry for almost ten minutes now, never satisfied with how high or low it hung. He hummed and drew his gaze up Muriel’s back to his broad shoulders, then to his arms and ultimately his hands.

           “Maybe a little downwards,” he recommended.

           “Which way?” Muriel asked, tilting it down left then right.

           (Y/N) tutted. “Not that way, the other way.”

           Muriel sighed and shifted the tapestry once more. “How about now?”

           “Hmm…I don’t know…lemme see the other way again.”

           The man started to shift, then a sudden realization came across him and he stopped and glared over his shoulder. “You’re doing this on purpose.”

           Feigning innocence, he replied, “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

           “Yes, you do,” Muriel countered, and while a flush crossed his cheeks he added, “You’re making me move it back and forth so you can stare at me.”

           (Y/N) scoffed, offense coming over his expression as he snapped the tome shut and stood to his feet. “Okay, I’m not going to sit here and listen to you accuse me of something I’m clearly doing.”

           Muriel cocked a dark brow and deadpanned, “Oh so what are you doing to do then?”

He gathered a few pillows from off the bed and walked over to where Muriel was standing before he dropped the cushions down. Collapsing on the floor, (Y/N) curled his hands under his head and stared up at Muriel, who was still glowering at him with enflamed cheeks.

           Nodding, (Y/N) said, “I’m going to lay here and watch you work.” Grinning, he chirped, “My big strong craftsman.”

           Muriel spluttered and turned around, ignoring every comment (Y/N) gave him afterwards.

***

           Now Muriel wasn’t a fool. And sometimes, just sometimes, Muriel gave as good as he got, and returned (Y/N)’s teasing with some of his own.

***

           The night had drawn on, and though (Y/N) loved a good party, for some reason, he felt tired. Mentally and physically. It was the kind of tired that made him want to crawl under the covers and sleep for an entire day. That or have someone crack his back like a glow stick and send him on his way. Given the way he was feeling, he figured that causing worry amongst his friends wouldn’t be polite, so he slipped out the back and wandered down to the fountain for a breather.

           (Y/N) laid down and stared up at the starry sky for a few moments before shutting his eyes. Just a few moments of shut eye would revive him for the last couple hours of the night and then they’d all go to bed; Nadia had happily fixed a room for he and Muriel—then again, she said they always had a room at the palace.

           He placed his hands across his abdomen and breathed deeply, the scent of daphne flowers settling over him. As the peace washed over him, the tension drained from his body and he went boneless against the cool, stone rim of the fountain, slowly beginning to drift into sleep. Rustling leaves sounded, but with as comfortable as he was, there was no way that (Y/N) was going to open his eyes, let alone care.

           Footsteps came his way until they stopped before him and heaving a sigh, (Y/N) cracked an eye open, a lazy smile crossing his lips when he gazed up at Muriel.

           “Found me, did you?” he joked, and Muriel merely gave him a good-natured huff and moved to sit down, gently maneuvering (Y/N)’s head until it rested on his thigh.

           “You left.”

           (Y/N) groaned and shifted his neck until he was comfortable again, closing his eyes once more when Muriel began to softly caress his cheek.

           “Needed a moment of reprieve.”

           Muriel snorted. “Consider dinner with our friends a painful event?”

           “It is when Asra and Julian start going at it over whether magic or science is easier to perform.” (Y/N)’s grunted. “I’ve never seen a couple so in love get so heated over a subject.”

           The hand caressing his cheek stopped and he heard, “This coming from the man who argues with Nadia whether sleeping on silk or satin sheets is better.”

           (Y/N)’s eyes flew open, and he griped, “It’s practically the same thing!”

           Muriel tipped his head side to side. “Well, satin is a weave of fabrics and silk is a natural fiber, (Y/N). Technically they’re not the same thing.” He smiled. “And silk is shimmery whereas satin is glossy.”

           He glowered at the man. “Whose side are you on? Because right now it seems like you’re agreeing with Nadia over—”

           Muriel leaned down and pressed a kiss to (Y/N)’s forehead, effectively silencing him before he murmured, “I’m on the side of the person I love the most. And that’s you, (Y/N).”

           He felt his cheeks warm, and he let out a ‘pfft’, looking off into the distance. “I can’t believe you’re flirting with me so casually.”

           Muriel chuckled. “Must be your influence on me.”

           (Y/N) met his eyes. “Good or bad influence?” His lover took a moment, seeming to think seriously about it. “Really? It’s taking you that long to decide?”

           Muriel shrugged. “You’re not exactly a shining pillar of moral perfection, (Y/N).”

           “Is this revenge for being a jackass all the time? This is revenge for being a jackass all the time, isn’t it?”

           His lover huffed a laugh. “You’re my jackass.”

[quirky-hero-imagines]

Anyone but him

Pairings: Prohero!Katsuki Bakugou x F!reader

Genre: Romance, Smut/lemon

Warnings: Sexual content, cursing

“Please Katsuki! At least let me do a try out!” You beg your husband from across the dining table.

You have been pestering Bakugou about letting you work at his agency for over a month now, but to no avail. You are aware that your quirk isn’t the strongest, and you aren’t pining to go after villains directly but you’d like to sign up as a standby in case of emergency. Your quirk allows you to turn any areas of your body or the whole thing to liquid, so it’s not like you would get hurt easily.

But Bakugou gets extremely worried and agitated when you bring it up, claiming he has seen too much to allow it. You know your husband goes through extreme and life threatening situations, but just being at home while he goes out to risk his life everyday has you feeling awful.

Bakugou’s fork scrapes over his plate, a few peas flying off at his angry flicking. His brows are furrowed together as he glares at you from across the table. “Y/N the answer was no, is still no, and will stay NO for fucks sake.” He says irrtately. You pout at him and hang your head to the side in sadness, giving him sad eyes to hopefully change his mind.

Sighing loudly, Bakugou finishes his plate before getting up to clean it. You feel your heart sink as you sit alone at the table as it was never your intention to get him upset. You had hoped that if you worked you could take a bit of the burden off of him together with the other supports, but rn you seem to cause him only new ones.

You pick up your plate to join Bakugou in the kitchen. He looks at you with a irritated face as he snatches the plate out of your hand before putting it in the sink. You grab onto his muscular arm, pressing yourself against him. Looking up at him through your lashes you give him an apologetic face. “Please don’t be mad at me Katsuki.” You say and you see his expression soften.

Bakugou sighs again and takes his arm out of your grip so he can hold you instead. “I’m not... mad at you. You should know better than that after all these years.” He says, grumbling a bit. You nod against his chest, enjoying his warmth through his tank top as his heart beats steady under you. “I know... Can you promise you’ll consider it at least?” You ask him.

His chest heaves under you and his grip on you tightens. “Sure.” Bakugou groans.

-

Three weeks had passed and Bakugou had not considered it. Just like he had told you his answer would stay no.

He would go mad if something ever happened to you, even with your quirk he was worried about it. He knew how quick and sneaky villains could be, so what if you reacted just a second too late? He wouldn’t be able to live with himself. But you also weren’t a child, you were a woman who could decide for herself. Ah fuck this he had thought about it enough.

As he goes on his daily patrol route he has already pushed the situation far out of his mind, assuming you’ll forget about it eventually.

“Hey Katsuki!” Bakugou immediately feels irritated as he hears the voice call out. He looks over to see Midoriya in his hero costume making his way over to him. “I don’t have time to chit chat, I actually have work to do.” Bakugou quickly snaps at him. He still couldn’t believe that that extra is the number one hero right now and not him.

Midoriya smiles brightly at Bakugou as he already starts stomping away. “Can you just tell y/n to be at the agency at 07:00 next Friday? Thanks bye.” Midoriya yells from a distance.

Bakugou almost breaks his back turning around so fast, eyes wide in anger but Midoriya is already gone.

What the hell were you doing at his agency?

-

You feel nervous as you neatly put the plates down on the dressed up table, wondering if Bakugou will get home soon.

A nice table cloth and a candle could really change a simple dining table to something just a bit more refined, and you want everything to look nice for him tonight.

You haven’t told Bakugou yet that you applied to work for Deku’s agency, already haven gotten through two solicitation rounds. You know about the rivalry between them and your stomach turns thinking about how he’ll react.

It was all the way back in high school right? Let bygones be bygones?

Thinking of your husband you don’t feel like he’s a very forgive and forget kind of man, but oh how you hope he is. You straighten out your dress, hands running over the soft red material.

You take a deep breath. You are wearing a beautiful red dress with a lacy bra and thong underneath, matching red lipstick and some eyeliner to make your eyes stand out. You look good, the room looks good, you cooked his favorite food, so it can’t go wrong can it?

The front door is opened and you quickly move to stand near it, palms sweaty. Bakugou walks in with a scowl before looking around in confusion.

“Ta-da!” You say, arms outstretched excitedly. Bakugou squints his eyes, locking the door and setting down his stuff.

“Midoriya says to meet him at the agency at 07:00 next friday.” Bakugou blankly says, making your heart sink to your stomach. Fuck.

You bite your lip anxiously, not sure what your next move should be. “Katsuki... I’m sorry that I didn’t tell-” You start but Bakugou cuts you off, crashing his lips harshly onto yours.

He deepens the kiss, slipping his tongue past your slightly parted lips to meet yours. Your hands move up to his shoulders, holding onto them tightly as your lips move against his.

Bakugou moves one hand to grab onto your waist, the other tangling in your hair. You feel the desperation in the kiss, his lips not leaving yours at all while his tongue rubs against yours continuously.

You can’t think about anything but Bakugou as he holds you, his taste and the scent of his cologne flooding your senses.

A sigh escapes your lips as Bakugou’s pull away, leaving you to look up at him. Your eyes widen as you notice the hurt look on his face. “Are you not mine y/n?” He asks. You move one hand to cup his face gently. “Of course I am! You are my only one, you always have been.” You tell him reassuringly.

The hand in your hair moves away to take your hand off of Bakugou’s face. “Then why would you go to that fucking nerd behind my back?!” He snaps and you flinch at his words, not being able to deny anymore that you hurt him.

“I’m sorry Katsuki! You didn’t even take it seriously so I thought that I would seek out another agency.” You explain, making Bakugou shake his head disapprovingly.

“Out of all the agency’s out there... You had to pick Deku’s?” He asks, irritation sounding in his voice as his hand keeps a tight grip on yours. “But he’s the number one...” Your sentence trails off as you realize that’s probably the shittiest response you could’ve given.

Before you know it you are on the floor, Bakugou on top of you with fire in his eyes. You wonder how he did that without you even feeling it but are quickly snapped out of your thoughts as his lips attack your neck. You whimper beneath him as he nibbles and sucks on your skin.

Bakugou’s face moves right next your right ear after leaving two hickeys. “He may be number one out there, but in this house I am. You best remember that baby.” He says, his words and his hot breath against your skin sending a shiver down your body. You feel a dull throb starting between your legs as Bakugou returns his lips to your neck, slowly making his way down to your exposed cleavage. Your hands fly up to grab onto his hair as he sucks on the sensitive skin of your breasts.

Bakugou chuckles at your reaction, teasingly giving your skin a harder nibble. You moan out, rubbing your thighs together as the heat and wetness between them grows.

Your writhing legs don’t go unnoticed by Bakugou, bringing one hand to slowly trace down your body as the other keeps him steady. “Spread your legs.” He mumbles against your skin and you happy oblige. He moves so he is sitting between your spread legs now, continuing to leave hickeys at your cleavage as his hand delves underneath your dress.

You gasp out as you feel Bakugou’s fingers slowly trace against your clothed sex, the material dampening as its pressed against your slick heat. He moves his face away from your skin, sporting a huge grin. “Soaked already huh.” He teases you. Your cheeks flare up from blushing as you nod your head, eager for whats coming next.

Bakugou’s lips catch yours once again, kissing you passionately as he pulls your panties down before taking them off completely. You moan into his mouth as two of his fingers glide from your mount to your wet folds, teasingly dipping between them before gliding out again. You break the kiss, panting as you look at your husband with lustful eyes. “Please touch me more Katsuki.” You tell him.

“Tell me who’s your number one and maybe I will.” He says, the grin returning to his face. “You’re my number one. You are the only man who can please me.” You say, stroking his ego with a smile.

“That’s fucking right.” Bakugou growls before suddenly sliding his fingers into you, your wetness making it effortless. You moan and bite your lip as he slowly moves his fingers in and out of your pussy, your hole eagerly clenching around them.

You buck into Bakugou’s touch as he fingers you slowly, your pussy fluttering around his fingers when he brushes against your sweet spot. He watches your face intently as he fucks you on his fingers, a slight blush showing on his cheeks as well now.

“You look so beautiful.” He says before kissing you again. Your lips sloppily move against his, your body completely engulfed in the pleasure he’s giving you. You feel the tension in you lower regions building, feeling that with a few strokes it will come undo. You desperately buck up against his hand, pussy clenching as you are chasing your release.

Bakugou notices this and abruptly pulls his fingers out of you, making you whine disapprovingly as he leaves you empty.  You pout at him and he chuckles at your disappointment. “I’m not going to let you cum anywhere besides around my cock.” He says and you blush deeper at his dirty talk.

“T-take me to the bed then.” You say, flustered. Bakugou shakes his head, unzipping his jeans before sliding them down enough to reveal his boxers. You stare at his massive erection, barely even remembering what you just said.

“You have been bad, so I’m going to take you right here like you deserve.” Bakugou tells you. Your pussy clenches around nothing, more wetness coming out as his words turn you on even more. You nod your head, propping yourself up on your elbows to watch him pull him boxers down.

Bakugou palms himself through his boxers before slowly sliding them down to join his jeans. Even after all these years your jaw drops a bit at his size, you really did get lucky.

His dick twitches as he strokes it with one hand, slowly moving up and down the shaft before flicking his thumb over the head, collecting the thick bead of precum.

You watch Bakugou closely as he lets go of his dick and bends over you. His thumb slowly presses between your plump lips, looking you in the eye as you suck at his finger. The tangy taste spreads through your mouth as you eagerly continue sucking until Bakugou is satisfied.

Bakugou takes his thumb out of your mouth with a pop, showing you a satisfied grin. “Good girl.” He says, giving you a quick kiss before moving back to sit on his knees again.

He flips the skirt of your dress up so you are completely exposed up to your waist. Goosebumps cover your skin as the cold air hits it, you yourself starting to shiver a bit from excitement.

Nestling himself further between your legs he spreads your legs wider for him, his dick sliding over your pussy teasingly as he closes the distance. You moan softly beneath him as he teases your soaked slit with his dick, dipping between the folds only to drag back up and hit your clit, your wetness coating it more and more.

“Tell me what you want.” Bakugou says, his voice sultry from lust, the tip of his dick pressing against your entrance as he holds it there. “I want you inside me Katsuki. I want to cum around your big cock.” You say, nibbling at your bottom lip in anticipation.

Bakugou’s free hand moves to grab your waist and he lets out a groan as he slides into you, clearly content with your answer. Your pussy stretches around his girth, one thrust burying him deep inside it.

You moan out, one hand grabbing onto his arm at your waist as you feel him fill you up. Bakugou bends his body over yours, allowing you to wrap your legs loosely around his hips. He pulls almost completely out of you, only leaving the tip, before slamming back in. He stays still to feel your body shudder around him as you scream out his name, enjoying how one thrust is already making you a mess.

You take your hand away from his arm so you can put them over his shoulders, clinging onto the back of his neck. “Katsuki please fuck me hard!” You beg him. You feel his hand on your waist tighten and then he starts thrusting into you fast, granting your wish.

His hips slam against yours harshly, Bakugou setting a bruising pace as he fucks you into the floor. The sounds of skin slapping against skin and your lewd moans fill the room, him making sure he completely bottoms out at every thrust.

Bakugou groans out your name as your pussy flutters around him, the familiar tension once again building. “You’re so fucking tight.” He groans out but you can only moan in response.

Bakugou moves his free hand to fondle your breasts through your dress, squeezing them softly as he continues fucking your pussy.

His pace doesn’t falter for minutes before he moves his fondling hand to put one of your legs over his shoulder, making you scream out as the position allows him to thrust even deeper.

“F-fuck Katsuki! I’m s-so close!” You moan out, Bakugou hitting your sweet spot now with every thrust of his hips. “That’s it baby, cum on my cock.” He says encouragingly as he picks up the pace even more.

Your body tenses up from his hard thrusts before suddenly completely relaxing, the building tension snapping as you cum hard around him. Your walls contract and squeeze around Bakugou’s dick, earning loud curses as he gives a few more hard thrusts before shooting his cum inside you.

Bakugou thrusts slightly inside you, riding out your orgasms as he contious filling you with him cum. You lay panting underneath him, having him lean to kiss you as his dick twitches one last time before he slips out of you.

The kiss is short as Bakugou pulls away from you, grabbing his dick to smear the cum left on it on your thighs. You giggle through your panting as you feel his warm cum on your skin. “Just dirty me even more.” You say teasingly.

Bakugou gives you a smirk, pulling his boxers and pants up before helping you get up, swooping you up into his arms. “Oh I will, don’t think you are done so easily.” He tells you. You fake shock before giving him a smile.

“If you really want to work for an agency then I’ll allow it under strict circumstances. At MINE though.” He tells you as he carries you to the bedroom. You chuckle and press a kiss to his jaw. “So all I had to do is fuck the boss?” You ask teasingly, batting your eyelashes at him.

Bakugou throws you down onto the bed, earning a yelp from you as he pounces on you like a predator. “I think your boss needs some more convincing.” He tells you with a grin, making your heart skip a beat.

[mokkemusic]

GO READ CICADA SUMMER

@spades-queen​

So I wanted to write down my thoughts about Cicada Summer. Which oh gosh if you love Hanako at all please just go read this. You won't regret it! I PROMISE YOU!

I’ll put this under read more now cause I don’t want to spoil anything for anyone . So just know spoilers are under the read more.

I feel I should say this just beforehand though these are just my personal thoughts and i’m not really good at holding back my emotions. If I love something I let you REALLY know I love something and cry over the simplest details if they mean something to me. I may not have interpreted everything in the way you wanted them to be interpreted as the writer OR I might have thought a character was an OC or like that cause I am not fully caught up on the manga (I’m on ch 61 as of rn) and fair warning my grammar is horrible sometimes and my key pad keeps freezing so apologies for that in advance. Ok with that out of the way please allow me to gush :,))

This took me forever to put into words and I scrapped this twice but I think I’m just gonna go with it this time. This is a jumbled mess but my thoughts just can’t stay in a straight line today for some reason. So we’re just gonna run with this. I mean this in the nicest possible way when I say THIS FIC IS BREAKING MY HEART! I love it! I love it I love it! But the PAIN I feel and the immersion when reading these chapters is like I’m also there wandering adrift with Amane at night. Feeling the crushing weight of everything and so so empty. (Probably doesn’t help I was up till 5 am reading this the other night)

But the way you write completely does that for me!! TSUCHIGOMORI again I mean this with all the love but GOSH I CAN’T! The torment you are making him feel! (Secretly slow claps 👏🏻 in the background) Yes I love the pain. I love the genuine emotion from all this! But I won’t deny my eyes were watering. Really watering I can’t remember the exact scenes but at times there was this big lump in my throat.

I have to confess how much I love canon. I know I know it’s not something most people love. But I do I really am strange I just love more then anything either deleted scenes to canon or something that could basically be canon. I know that’s a dangerous line to tread and I’m not saying I don’t love AU’s but I just have a special place in my heart for origins and deleted scenes. The problem with most of those though is they are so out of character.. or there’s just this one particular thing that bothers me. I’m really not trying to over gush.. but really I can’t see anything that seems off (And I’m using a telescope) Your characterization is SO GOOD! Not only the characterization but the characters actions don’t seem out of character either! You really really know how to get into the minds and view points!

Particular scenes like When Tsuchigomori is talking to that kid in class who “lost” his jacket and trying to break up their argument over the ghost discussion. It’s such a not important example but it’s so true to tsuchigomori! Even scenes like that I see them in a film strip play out in my mind. His expressions and attitude about even that small exchange. That’s when you know your writing it top tier for even scenes like that.

Another example is when Amane first spots what he thinks is a white weird looking cat and meets Yako. The way you write her.., sorry I just could go on it’s brilliant!

(Ok I’m staying more focused now)I also wanted to bring up the level of significant detail. Well personally I think these are significant details cause they are a few things I latched onto and wanted to expand on this ...

I’m just gonna list them. Like I said this is a bit jumbled but it’s the best way I can get my genuine thoughts out about this.

1- There’s this scene in actual canon that makes me have a similar feeling about the timing in how you write so I’m just gonna talk about that first.  It’s the scene in the Book Stacks Arc when Nene and Kou have to tell Tsuchigomori their secrets and then they think Hanako should have to as well.

“Oh my you want to hear secrets about me? “ “No thanks but I do appreciate the offer. I know more then enough.”

I won’t go on a tangent about this but this detail destroys my soul and when you go back and re read or re watch the anime after it’s only then that it does! Cause then you know! It’s the timing of it!

The way you use timing in your fic going back to the origin story’s (not just Amane’s but the interactions with all the other people and supernaturals around him) like when Amane first meets Yako and then in my mind I think forward to when he goes

“Hey number 2. It’s been a while. Do you remember me?” .... “So you guys are ... friends?” “She’s a wonder. I’m a wonder. Sometimes it’s assumed.”

We don’t know much about Hanako’s origin. Actually we know practically nothing about Hanako’s origin. We know more about Yugi Amanes backstory then Hanako’s origin of how he came to be Hanako and THAT is really saying something. (Gosh I so hope soon will get to know some more about both) But the way you wrote the introduction with Amane and Yako before Hanako was even a Wonder... I can’t describe it but it’s that kinda detail that makes me feel a slight similar feeling to the “You want to hear secrets about me?” example if I go back now and watch the Missaki stairs episode.

It’s because of your word choices and timing (it’s seamless) It’s just the story telling itself with those details..I hope that makes some sense? I can’t think of words. Obviously you know I’m not a writer cause I’m not good at this but it was something that was a significant detail for me.

Second-Your original character of Nakamura. How her sweet and pure  personality and inquisitive helpful nature wanted her to try and see if she could see over that mountain that was Amanes guarded wall and how she just kept trying until that was completely taken away from her with his death. I really like her and I have this suspision it was an intentional parallel to Nene In a very natural subtle way (that’s just what I interpreted) to think now thinking forward how Hanako gravitated to Nene’s personality cause a part of It might have slightly reminded him of a could have been friend he never took the opportunity to let even slightly in and regretted that. Even worse with that reminder and seeing Nene at first glance and knowing she was just gonna die. You really REALLY know how to bring on the hints and detail driven Angst!

Third. I have to bring up Tsuchigomori’s and Yako’s dynamic. It always took on a most light hearted feel with these two who are basically stuck with each other for eternity. And they may or may not at times slightly reminded me of a very old (we’re talking ancient) married couple. Your dynamic and internal thought monologue from both their povs about each other were solid gold 👌🏻.

Forth Emi and Shuuya THE TENSION IN MY BODY WHEN EMI... AHHH! And then he ran into Nakamura LITERALLY INTO HER BODY! Jumping out the window and then the scene outside .:. Ahh I get chills. Chills. Then Tsuchigomori protecting his student .. his surrogate son ok I’m fine. I’m fine. :,( Anyway .. yea that was so good! 😭 The scenes were so fast pace it was shock and awe I was feeling mostly and then when it calmed down with Tsuchigomori and Amane just being there together that’s when my chest got tight again. But I’m so intrigued about Emi. I mean I know she’s established and important but how you are gonna continue to write her is what I’m so curios about. We know so little about her.

The exchange between Amane and Emi after when he seeks her out and tells her one day she will be a great exorcist and the hesitation she mulls over in her mind. Not understanding this supernatural at all. Brings me back to Kou and his conflicting emotions towards Hanako when they first met and the parallels just make me so emotional!

I will also confess I’m not completely caught up on the manga I have around 7 more chapters to go as I’m on chapter 61 right now. So unless they said Teru and Kous grandmothers first name in those chapters I’m gonna assume you chose it.

Same goes for the first clock keeper Shuuya I don’t know what to make of him as of right now and haven’t gotten to the part in the manga I think you said in your authors note that he was briefly introduced in? But again I love what you did with this! He was such a fun and contrasting character to the newest clock keeper.

Introducing this character and what Amanes first response was to him. Someone else who could see him! How that made him feel. Really makes me think of his response to Akane now and Hanako just hoping that that he can have another friend and someone to interact with and even though Akane um.. let’s go with dislikes him he doesn’t care cause it’s someone else that he can actually interact with.

The flashbacks with Tsukasa. Oh boy. Oh boy. Gosh I have no idea what to make of Tsukasa in general like it pains me so much cause I hate his actions but I feel SO SO BAD FOR HIM! Something made him the way he was! I love your flashback scenes so much! I love seeing that human small child side to him. It’s just so so sad :,( Wait how old were they in the flashback scene of the festival? Does the one in 1964 when Nene traveled back still exist in the canon of this story?

And also speaking of Tsukasa (I know this one you can’t answer cause this might be a plot point) but why couldn’t Tsuchigomori find his book? That’s what I am dying to know.

I could go on so much more about Amane and Tsuchigomori but it’s so hard for me to put into words for all the chapters so far. My next review will be more focused on just the latest chapter so this is a bit of a mess. You really understand this dynamic and it’s a dynamic that personally means so so much to me. What changed everything for me when I first got into Hanako was the Bookstacks arc. That changed everything for me. Knowing who this boy of Yugi Amane was and the dynamic we got to see with the only person who knew who he was when he was human! (I really hope they dive more into that and we see more Tsuchigomori telling us about that) Some of these themes and concepts hit me so personally and my heart breaks for Yugi so much.

I probably missed a lot but I really feel like this is just such a mess even though these are all my genuine thoughts im sure more will pop back into my head later.

Lastly if you wouldn't be opposed I may try to make something for it creatively. You know how certain fics have their own fan art and such ... 

I wish there were so many actual visual fan arts made of this story for more visualization! If only I had talent. ( I may possibly try my hand at one but I have only drawn one piece of art ever)

These are just the scenes off the top my head Tsuchigomori next to Amane on the staircase as he cries when he first realizes he’s a spirit

Amane sitting in his own desk next to Nakamura watching her sleep

Amane and Emi looking right up at the ghost of the moon in the daylight before Amane disappears from her sight

Tsuchigomori bandaging Amane yet again in the nurses office. Telling him he will eventually fade away he’s not attached to anything here anymore he’s just a drift.

Amane looking at himself in the bathroom mirror not recognizing himself gritting the phantom pain in his abdomen as looks to see it’s physically rotting away (that’s a bit darker of one😅 but I love it)

Amane telling Tsuchigomori as they watch the lanterns he’s not going anywhere again when Tsuchigomori tells him “maybe now would be the best time to cross”

Ok .. I made myself cry again but these scenes stick out to me so much. You should have fan art for them cause they are just that good! :,)

I hope in someway if you do read this you somewhat like my thoughts on this even if they are jumbled. I had to gush about this but also maybe I latched onto a detail that isn’t really brought up or something. That’s another reason I wanted to share my thoughts with you. 

Really your writing is such a privilege! I feel so lucky to come across something like this and to be captivated by it and (breaking down at 5 am over it) Thank you again for sharing this creation It’s inspiring creatively and I feel very grateful ❤️

[nyrator]

another long vent post about depression/anxiety

extremely depressed tonight

first made the mistake of driving myself to the grocery store at 6pm, first I had to try scraping the ice off the windshield with nothing but a broom and bare hands, then driving itself was nightmareish, the car feels like a death trap to me, very loose and sloppy compared to my last car, so loud and uncomfortable with no audible music to calm my nerves. My eyes have worsened to the point where I can’t see anything at night- glare takes up my whole vision, even with anti-glare shades. I was driving well below the speed limit the entire time and still almost hit three pedestrians who were all recklessly out on the roads in all black for whatever reason. My nerves are completely shot from it, my chest feels like I’m in a vice and can’t breathe, my eyes are wide open and hunched over the steering wheel, and my body feels both like I’m about to wet myself at any moment and that I’m too stiff/tense/frozen to function as a human at all, it’s that fight-or-flight response at its extreme. Meanwhile, my skin must be weak- my knuckles bleed when driving, and my wrists bled just from carrying in bags of groceries.

then getting home and just dealing with personal drama of someone I know who is so depressed and self destructive and too smart to reason with, who refuses/is unable to seek professional help, who just doesn’t understand or just can’t help venting to me nonstop, no matter how much I beg them not to over and over- their life is so terrible that suicide seems like the only option to them, and I don’t want them to do so, but I can’t keep suffering like this either and I feel like the only thing preventing them from doing so, as poor a job as I do as a human being anyway. But I can’t help them if they can’t help themselves, even if they were just ate a bit better, or just had a journal or someone anonymous they could talk to, but it seems inescapable and impossible to change anything and all we do is argue over it until I snap at them to leave me alone. That person is probably reading this right now and probably hating it, but I doubt anyone on this site even knows who they are.

Tuesday morning, I couldn’t sleep at all from anxiety- it was so severe and inescapable, I laid in bed for four hours feeling like I was dying until I was finally able to sleep for two hours. I can’t seem to stay asleep longer than two hours anymore. Was supposed to hang out with friends that day, but between lack of sleep, depression, and my absolute terror at driving in a snowstorm, I ended up just staying home.

Anxiety has gotten so bad again. I know a lot of how the mechanics work behind it, I know a lot of pains are from tension and lack of breathing. But my old coping mechanisms don’t work anymore. I can focus on breathing for several minutes straight and then fall right back into suffocating. Music, counting things, meditating, none of it helps anymore.

One way to describe the feeling of anxiety- it’s kind of like when you fall asleep on your arm, and you feel all the blood rushing back into it and that tingling sensation. Imagine that, maybe a bit less, but throughout your entire body (especially chest), your body is stiff and not numb, and your entire body is vibrating or shivering/shaking or something.

I still spend 16+ hours laying in bed every single day. When I got home from shopping, the walking around (and the stress of driving) was enough to send me straight to bed, I was so tired and weak. It’s probably why I don’t sleep properly, I’m half awake in bed all the time, what need is there for sleep

I have mail I haven’t opened, taxes I still have to do, messes to clean, and don’t care for any of it. Can’t even talk about some things I’ve been doing to myself out of spite or general depression, the way I’ve been abusing. I promise to try not to do anything too crazy or directly harmful, but even then I worry about slipping up- I tried one thing I shouldn’t talk about, which wasn’t too serious, but still seriously concerning how easy it was to try doing

still haven’t contacted a therapist, my fear of calling someone is so strong I can’t overcome it, especially not after just waking up. Talked to some friends, some agree that I should, at least one thinks it’s a waste of time and money- up to $125 per session to just get a glorified phone call thanks to covid restrictions. I just don’t see the point if I’m still stuck in my apartment at my computer, especially if I have an internet addiction already.

The lack of doing anything is driving me insane, I think. I’ve played four single player games in 2020- ACNH, KH MoM, Panel de Pon, and Picross. In terms of things watched on my own, probably just Japan Sinks and whatever else was on Netflix the few months I had it. Don’t feel motivated to play or watch anything anymore, nothing seems interesting, and mostly just do things with friends if at all

Even ACNH, the game I play the most, I barely do anything in it- mostly just get new items from stores, that’s it. My island decorating has come to a hard halt, mostly because I barely have any furniture I’d like to embellish it with, and mainly because I have no ideas to layout most of it

I want to create, but don’t have the energy to make anything at all. Rotten Nyan is still my current goal, but anxiety has made it next to impossible to work on. I’ve tried several times the past few weeks, all met with failure- the anxiety’s too much, half the time I don’t even know what’s causing it, but my body just gets too tense and cramped without even doing anything, and I just can’t breathe at all while working on it.

Thought about making an omake comic for it, then realized what a terrible idea it was, and how hard it is to draw comics in general. Or anything in general. Wrote down the entire comic while laying in bed one day, went to draw it, was unable to, tried making it a yonkoma, gave up, and felt sick thinking of all the gross things in it that I just made a vent description of Middle Lave and just posted that to the RN tumblr instead.

I can’t think of any ideas, I feel like my art has regressed- I’ve taken more shortcuts for the sake of my hands tensing so fast from anxiety, and I’ve gotten decent at drawing middle Lave I feel, but anything besides a character standing is impossible for me- any environments or character interactions that I’d love to do just feel impossible, let alone my inability to write good ones. Anything I try to think of writing-wise always ends up the same gross content that burned into my memories that I just can’t feel comfortable talking about much at all, nor do I think it’s content people want to see at all.

There’s a lot of detailed kind of art I’d like to do. I kind of want to loosen my restrictions on myself and just draw whatever suffering I feel like, maybe once I use the RN twitter more I might get a little more courage to do so. I see many artists draw detailed scenes in single images, and no matter how hard I try, I just can’t capture that feeling.

Part of me feels torn about it being an autobiography for people to relate to, and being a suffering experience for people to find some weird enjoyment out of. I feel like I’ve lost sight of what it was originally meant to be and now just enjoy “bullying” Middle Lave half the time I guess, but unfortunately for me, bullying makes me feel like vomiting and is hard to draw consistently- maybe I’m too nice. I don’t know, I’m just rambling at this point. The comic is still laid out and just meant to explore the life of Lave, but it’s just so hard to work on.

In terms of other things, I have no idea what to do

Vtuber/streaming? Hate my voice, can’t focus on learning what I need for it in terms of rigging and texturing models. I only know the basics of making 3D things and nothing else.

Console art? I already designed all the ones I’m mainly interested in, but like I mentioned before, can’t think of any character interactions at all that I feel like drawing.

Making a game? I know 2k3 well enough to make anything in it event-wise, though never got over my map failings, and I can’t commit to anything long-term. Godot or another program, or programming in general? Good luck.

I just want to make something, work on a project without losing steam or letting anxiety prevent me from learning. Can’t focus on anything long enough to learn it- Japanese, making a game, programming, a new hobby, anything. I just don’t have the drive to do anything and will give up anything I even try to start, so what’s the point in even trying anything. I have books I haven’t read that I’ve been meaning to read for years, and still don’t have an ounce of energy to want to even organize them on their shelf, let alone open it

At the very least, I got my first big commission (second one ever), designing an OC for someone, and it’s going well, though tonight I’ve lost steam to finish it, and I hope I can get it back tomorrow to try to finalize it.

I’ve mentioned it before, but I really wish I just had someone guide me with art- I miss doing those 30 day challenge kind of things, or “send a number/emoji” kind of asks for OCs, but tumblr’s so inactive that I don’t see them on my dash anymore, and don’t know how to even look for them, especially not on sites like twitter these days. Though, the problem is, no one knows exactly what I like, and I feel awful letting people down if they ask for something I don’t want to draw

I can’t focus on exercise long term, and I’m so out of practice that exhaustion is too strong to beat. I’ve been trying to walk up and down on a step stool for exercise to get me back into basic movement, but even that’s too tiring. Want to do it while watching something, then I realize, I don’t watch anything at all, not even youtube, just an occasional artist stream that I mainly chat with rather than watch

I feel like I’m going to collapse if I turn or move too suddenly, and my eyes are absolutely terrible- glasses are okay, but without them I’m completely blind now- not just blind, but it’s like my eyes see at two different angles sometimes, like one is slanted or something, very disorientating.

It’s 7:30AM, and no desire to sleep at all. Terrified of laying in bed and letting anxiety take over me again. Part of me wants to become completely nocturnal and just avoid everyone during the day and just respond to messages in the AM hours, just wake up at midnight each day and avoid dealing with people. Go to sleep when everyone starts to get active and just isolate myself entirely from society.

I feel like I exist with no purpose whatsoever, and it’s driving me insane- not that life is meant to have a purpose, but I could at least be doing something more than laying in bed all day every day for a year

[kunderdogs]

KNK As Dads

Thank you to the anon who requested it! I know it’s kind of sloppy but I hope you like it! :)

I tried to keep them all the same length but it’s hard to tell lol

Jihun

When you tell him you’re pregnant, he will fall on the floor

SO DRAMATIC

“WE WERE SO CAREFUL? OMG MY MOM WILL BE SO HAPPY!”

Buys five yards of bubble wrap to “baby proof the house”

You have to explain to him that’s not how it goes

He’ll ready every parenting book like ever

“Did you know that babies have nails in the womb?!”

“Please...it’s three in the morning...Go to sleep, Jihun.”

So affectionate

Wants to cuddle with your belly all the time

“Sorry babe, you’re my number two now. She’s my number one love.”

As soon as his daughter is born, he’s bawling

Uncontrollably

The docs have to calm him down because they’re afraid he’ll start hyperventilating.

Will not let her leave his sight for the first few months

Will be soooo dramatic when she learns to walk though

Bouncing off the walls when she takes her first step

“BABE OH MY GOD DID YOU- DID YOU SEEEEEE HER?? SHE TOOK HER FIRST STEP. GET THE C A M E R A!”

Made her a college fund when she was 5 days old

“It’s never too soon to start saving for college.”

Hogs all the baby time

Wants to feed her

Refuses to let anyone except you and him hold her until she’s maybe four months

Calls the other members her “weird Uncles”

Proudly announces to everyone her first words were “Dada” even though you were pretty sure she burped

At nights, he’ll sleep in her nursery

He’ll grow out of that habit around when she enters school

As she gets older, he’s always supportive

Definitely wants her to try singing

Knows she’ll sound like an angel

Wants her to do whatever she wants in life

Wants a lot of kids because he loves to spend time with them

Literally she’s his princess

The type of dad to have tea parties just cause his daughter loved them

“Tea party? Only if I can wear the purple tiara this time.”

Glares at any little boy that shows an interest in her

“EXCUSE ME. Keep your hands to yourself, thankyouverymuch.”

“Dad, I’m twenty and this is my boyfriend.”

“boYFRIEND?! You’re grounded, young lady. No dating until you’re married.”

Seoham

Panic

“What- you’re-?! !!!!”

Faints when you tell him you’re pregnant

Once he comes to, he’ll start crying

Very emotional the entire pregnancy

Even more so than you are

Experiences pregnancy sympathy pains

Has morning sickness right with you

You’re spending the majority of the first trimester taking care of him

He’s always apologizing lmao

As you get bigger, he’s in awe

Cannot believe he’s going to be a dad

Will always look at you like you’re the most beautiful thing in the world

Tearfully tells you he loves you at random times

And then you cry too cause the damn hormones

The member to gush to his fans about your new baby

(on VLIVE) “If it’s a girl, what name should we give it? Tinkerbell always has good ideas and suggestions...Boy name suggestions too!”

Will try to get you to quit your job when you get to 7 months

Is so nervous for the delivery

Coaching and holding your hand the WHOLE TIME

He’ll be your voice to your doctors (we love a king)

Crying as soon as he sees your son’s full head of hair

“You did it, baby, oh wow. He’s so beautiful. You did so well, love. I love you so much.”

Is a mESS

“Mommmm~ He’s healthy T-T come as soon as you can.” Sobs

Glares at anyone who tries to take your son from your arms

Will 100% give the doctors a hard time if his son is crying for “too long”

As he gets older, Seoham is the perfect father.

Loving, caring, and stern when he needs to be

But he’s sooooo soft

Hates to discipline him but knows he needs the correction

The type of dad to watch with love in his eyes as his child is running around the yard.

Threatens the members not to show him any bad words/actions

Reads and sleeps with his son (even tho his long body cannot fit on the red car bed)

Cries at almost every milestone (walking, talking, eating solid food, first hair cut, first day of school)

“He’s just growing up so fast, babe. Soon, he’ll be married and having kids of his own. What am I going to do then?”

“Seoham, this is his third birthday party...Get it together, baby.”

Not going to push his child into anything but encourages him to find hobbies or sports his likes

If your son likes sports, he’s at every. single. event. Practice, games, any of it

Records all the games and when he goes to college, he’ll make a highlight reel

Inseong

When you tell him, you’re pregnant, he won’t believe you

Not to mean you’re a liar

But he just cannot grasp it rn

“Ha ha, very funny, babe. I know you’re on the pill.”

Once you hand him the pregnancy stick, he’s all 

O_O “o-oh shit”

Needs to sit down cause he’s lightheaded

Doesn’t want to show you but he’s scared outta his mind rn

Smiles nervously

As time goes on and you start to show, it’ll finally become real to him

He’ll cry that night when you feel the baby moving and put his hand on your belly

Will hide all his worries and concerns from you and instead will ask the members 

Eventually he’ll speak to you about how nervous he is but he reassures you he wants a baby with you

He’ll feel better after talking to you

Very gentle with you when you’re pregnant and will get you any cravings you need

Schedules regular massages for you so you’re comfortable

Literally has hearts in his eyes when he sees how big you get in the last trimester

Doesn’t care what gender your baby is, just wants it healthy

Soft smiles and kisses when the doctor hands you a chubby baby boy

He’s crying but trying to put on a strong front for you

Wants to be your strength but eventually breaks down when he takes a step back and sees how you look at your son in your arms

“The most beautiful view I’ve ever seen...”

Fully bawling when you ask him if he wants to hold his son

Won’t stop calling the child “my son”

Taking pictures and videos of everything

Soccer dad FOR SURE

Has snacks and juice ON DECK 24/7

Supports their kid no matter what though

Hates to be the one to discipline and will even leave when you’re scolding your son

Screaming at the top of his lungs when he learns anything new

“HE COUNTED TO 10 OH MY GOD HEEJUN DID YOU HEARRRR THAT”

Affectionate :))))

Will pout if his son doesn’t want to give him kisses when he leaves for work

Dongwon

So so so so happy

Smiling so wide when you surprise him with baby converse.

“You’re not joking? You’re really pregnant? We’re having a baby?”

“I’m going to be a dad?”

Literally so excited!!!!

He gets to have a family with the love of his life!!

Immediately tells all his family and friends once he gets the okay from your doctor

Plans a gender reveal party and is wearing a pink shirt because he wants a lil princess to spoil.

Wouldn’t mind a boy, but wants to experience the “daddy/daughter” bond

RUNNING UP AND DOWN YOUR STREET WHEN HE FINDS OUT YOU”RE HAVING TWIN GIRLS (like on maury)

!!!!!! You’re like 0-O “does this say TWINS?!”

Feels like he hit the jackpot

Kisses you all over, hugging you gently and when you pull back, you can see tears in his eyes.

“I love you. Thank you for giving me two babies.”

He’s very sappy the entire pregnancy

“How’s my girls doing? Need anything, mama? Come here, I’ll rub your feet, baby.”

Takes you on a baby moon to wherever you wanna go just to pamper you before you give birth

Anything you want, he will give you

You could tell him your phone speaker wasn’t working and he’ll go out and get you a whole new phone

Watches you with hearts in his eyes as you sleep

Unfortunately, you can’t give birth naturally due to labor taking too long so the doctors have to preform a c-section.

A mess of nerves and tension as he holds your hand in the operating room

When he hears two cries, he nearly collapses next to you in relief. “You did amazing, love.”

Crying as he watches the doctors put both little girls on your chest

He strokes one of the twins tiny head, lips trembling as she softly cries out

“I never thought my heart could beat outside of my body.”

100% the overprotective dad

Down to play any girly games for them

Brings them to sporting events against their will

N O BOYS E V E R !!!!

NO EXCEPTIONS!!!!

ok maybe if they’re knk fans

MAYBE

Heejun

Terrified at first

Heejun is young (my age lol) so I feel like he wouldn’t particularly want kids until he’s in his late twenties-early thirties

He warms up to the idea of a child quickly because he LOVES kids

ESPECIALLY if it’s his with the love of his life

Not one to keep it a secret

He’ll call everyone in his life and give them the news

lowkey wants a boy because he doesn’t know if he can relate to a girl

But honestly as long as the baby is healthy, he’s over the moon

When he does find out it’s a boy, he’s buying matching clothes for him and his son

Tells everyone “I’m having a son T-T”

Is usually composed during the pregnancy - wide smiles and cheerful expressions

Will get you anything you want, no questions asks

(He’ll complain to the boys that your cravings are weird as hell tho. Who eats cheetos with peanut butter and power-aid? Disgusting)

Won’t ever say anything negative because he wants his child to grow up in a positive environment

Refuses any help in building or assembling any of the baby furniture or toys

“I have to do this. I’m a dad now. Dads build things.”

Only cries when he’s able to hold his son, wrapped up tightly like a burrito in the hospital.

You’d be passed out on the bed with the nurses busy by you, and he’d just sit with your son in his arms, tears flowing freely with a smile on his face.

“Hey little one, I’m your daddy.”

IN LOVEEEEE

YOUR SON CAN DO NO WRONG TO HIM

He’s a precious angel, even when he turns two and terrorizes literally everyone and everything in your house

Wants only the best for your son so he’ll make food and turn into a chef pretty quickly.

Eventually when your son shows how picky he really is, Heejun will give in and give him chicken nuggets

Play fights with him all the time

You still don’t know which one broke the bathroom window and they refuse to tell on the other

Very proud of his son’s accomplishments and will praise him for every little thing he can

Bribes him with popsicles and ice cream to get him potty trained

It worked so you couldn’t say much lol

His kid is his ride or die

Nothing will ever get between him and his son

Wants your son to be better than he is - and will push him to do well in school, all the way up to college

When you have a daughter, him and your son are full on body guard mode

“Hands off the models.” He says to Inseong as the older one plays with your daughter. 

“PRECIOUS CARGO COMING THRU.”

“Ten feet distance at all times, thank you.”

[sunlightdances]

ONE SHOTS:

SPN Angst Bingo ‘18 Masterlist Dean Headcanons/Bullet point Fics

Newest on top; updated 2/2/2021

Untitled (literally couldn’t think of a title for this lol): PG-13 for swearing She came out of nowhere, knocked him on his ass, and then asked him to apologize. How hard did he hit his head?

Body Language: PG-13 Low blood sugar sucks. Dean’s POV.

Everybody Knows I’m Torn Apart: PG-13 You manage to call Dean a few miles away from the bunker. Despite your injuries, you tell him the basics: you lost too much blood, you need a ride, you’re pretty sure you’re going to pass out soon. His gruff voice over the phone is the last thing you hear before you physically can’t keep your eyes open anymore.

Two Hearts on Fire: PG-13 3 times Dean is there for you and one time you’re able to return the favor.

Stay a Little Longer: PG You let yourself be vulnerable and Dean does too.

You’re an Ocean: PG The never ending push and pull between you and Dean finally comes to an end.

Take My Hand (When You Can’t See the Light): PG-13 (a few swears) Dean plays the knight in shining armor when you meet him by chance. Turns out you’ll meet him several more times. Everything happens for a reason, right?

Winter Air: PG Contrary to popular belief, Dean is a big softy who loves winter.

Slow Days: PG Dean meets you on a slow, lazy day in Lebanon at Christmas.

Come Home: PG Dean comes to your door in the middle of the night. it’s a good thing, too, because you’re gearing up for a fight.

Don’t Go Changing: PG-13 It was never supposed to end up like this. You find out the truth about Dean Winchester.

Dog Days: PG-13 (for violence) Dean rescues a dog and ends up being the one rescued.

Helping Hand: PG After recovering from an injury, you’re having a hard time getting back into fighting form. Dean helps you through it.

Sun Warmed: PG He sits on the edge of the table, watching you as you flit about the room, grabbing a mug, some coffee creamer, and sugar. You wait for him to make a comment about how sweet you like your coffee, but it never comes. Another sign that he’s not entirely himself today.

Untitled drabble: PG Someone is carrying you. Your head jostles until it finds purchase against a broad shoulder, and in your daze you can make out a conversation - though you’re not able to make sense of anything being said.Someone is urging you to open your eyes, You want to do what they ask, you want to ask questions, but you’re so tired.

I’ll Be Your Lifeline Tonight: PG Dean shoulders his own burdens. He always has. And truth be told, it comforted you to think he had it under control. Dean’s always been the one with the plan, the one who knew what to do next. Now that he doesn’t… you can’t lie, it freaks you out. But you have to help him right now. If the tables were turned, he’d do the same for you.

Untitled: PG You stop mid-sentence as you come around the corner into the rec room, seeing him fast asleep on the sofa. There’s a magazine on his lap and a few other books strewn around him, and while this isn’t really that out of the ordinary for him, it’s the glasses tucked into his collar that draw your attention.

It Echoes a Spark: PG-13 “I was on my way home. Traveling. Saw I was driving through town and thought… well, it’s almost our anniversary.” He winks, and it’s amazing how you’re not a puddle of goo right there on the floor.

Wrapped Up in Your Love: Rated PG @sixtysevenandwhiskey asked for: “i did that annoying thing where i put loads of smaller boxes inside one big box and you’re getting really mad but you don’t know that the ring is in the smallest box and i can’t wait to see your face”

Snow & Scarves: Rated PG @lipstickandwhiskey said “I gotta see you do “PULLING YOU IN FOR A KISS WITH A SCARF” because SWOON” and I mean, same, tbh.

Stay Here Til Sunrise: Rated T “You’re making a mental checklist of everything you need to do when you finally stop somewhere - the first thing being calling Sam to let him know his brother got his arm broken trying to be a goddamn hero again, followed closely by getting to a bathroom where Dean can’t see you as you try to calm the fuck down.”

Bruised Hearts: Rated T She sort of, kind of, probably hates him. He tells himself it’s for the best.  

Just Let Me Try: Rated T You get in a car accident not far from Dean’s shop and go to him for help. Mechanic!AU. Dean’s POV.

On Your Mark, Get Set, Bake: PG Dean discovers your guilty pleasure TV show.

I Remember Loving You: PG-13 When you think you’re in trouble, you go to Sam and Dean for help, despite the fact that you and Dean haven’t spoken or seen each other face to face in months.

Bright Lights Won’t Leave Me Alone: PG-13 Prompt: “We got involved in a fight at a bar and had to share the night in the same jail cell”

If It Keeps You By My Side: PG-13 The reader reveals something to Dean that turns his world upside down. Written for Annie’s 300 Follower Grand Budapest Motel Challenge!

One More Hour: PG Dean’s tired and can’t hide it from you no matter how hard he tries.

Danger Always Was a Friend of Mine: PG-13 You get stuck driving through a huge storm on your way to the bunker. Dean reacts in a way you don’t expect.

Run, Run, Run Away: PG-13 Dean calls you to go on a hunt he’d otherwise have to take solo. It takes quite a turn.

Lost Hope, Can’t Cope: PG-13 Dean helps you when your anxiety, stress, and everything else jumbled up in your head becomes too much. Alternates between the reader and Dean’s POV.

One Way to Shut You Up: PG A good, old-fashioned post-hunt celebration gives you the courage you finally need.

Now Close Your Eyes: PG You have a hard time letting other people take care of you.

Something About You, I Just Can’t Fight: Rated M You’re pretty sure Dean’s figured out your big, stupid crush on him, and you’re sure it’s only a matter of time before you spontaneously combust.

Loving Everything You Do: Rated T The washer broke. It’s not your fault that the only thing near you at the time was some of Dean’s clothes, okay.

Heavy Heart and a Heavy Mind: Rated T A badly-timed wish on your part and a curse from a witch has you and Dean reconsidering the nature of your relationship. Written for SPN Angst Bingo.

Let the Lonely In: Rated T After a bad day and a sleepless night, the reader and her insecurities are her own worst enemy.

Someone Throw a Lifeline: Rated T While wrapping up a case, Sam and Dean get a weird phone call that has Dean assuming the worst.

Everything You Are:  PG Dean’s POV.  Dean discovers the pretty librarian he met on a case is a little more “in the know” than he realized.

You’ve Had Me All Along: Rated M You’re so pissed that you’re even in this situation, your hands are shaking from adrenaline and anger. Huffing to yourself, you grab your phone out of your back pocket and dial one of two numbers you know by heart.

More Heart and Less Attack: Rated T The reader shows up at the bunker after being attacked, hurt and on the verge of a panic attack.

One More Time Before I Fall: Rated T This weird tension between you and Dean had to come to a head sometime, and what better time than when you’re trapped in the Impala with him for a long trip?

Untitled drabble: Rated T Dean has to bail you out of jail during a hunt, and isn’t happy about it when he sees you again.

Untitled drabble: Rated T One ghost down, five to go. You’re on your way to rescue the Winchesters.

Untitled oneshot: Rated PG Prompt: “I have been driving for the last 5 hours and all I want is some god damn beef jerky, so GET YOUR HAND OFF THE LAST PACKAGE ON THE SHELF YOU MAY BE HANDSOME STRANGER, BUT NO ONE IS STANDING IN BETWEEN ME AND THAT SALTY SNACK”

Breaks Your Heart Like Lovers Do: Rated PG Anon asked for a angsty fic based on “Happier” by Ed Sheeran. Don’t worry - there’s a happy ending!

Untitled Angst Day drabble: Rated T You’ve been hiding your feelings towards Dean for months, and when you guys have the biggest fight you can ever remember having, you reach a breaking point.

Seeing Eye to Eye and Heart to Heart: Rated T You get hurt on a hunt, and afterwards, Dean starts acting real weird.

Can’t Get You Close Enough: Rated M Dean tears into you after a hunt goes bad, causing you to have a panic attack. He makes a confession to your after, about why seeing you hurt makes him react that way.

I’ll Be Back, Give It Time: Rated M While you’re struggling with your feelings for Dean, you have your first fight.

Untitled drabble: Rated PG. You and Dean have this thing going on. You tease him, he teases you. You don’t expect it to lead to hurt feelings until it does.

Glasses: Rated M. Dean wears those glasses. You have feels.

Lately: Rated M (Dean POV, third person) Dean reflects on his feelings for the reader.

Now And Then I Get A Little Lost: Rated M (mild smut) Established relationship with Dean x Reader. The two of you run into Cassie on a hunt, and seeing Dean’s ex brings up some insecurities.

Got The Flu: Rated M Dean takes care of you when you’re sick, and confessions come in dramatic fashion. You know the drill.

Enough For Now: Rated M (mild smut, language) You haven’t seen Dean in over a year, and the scruff he’s sporting now is doing things to you.

Valentine’s Day oneshot: Rated M. Pure smut. Dean wears that coat. You know the one.

Don’t You Forget About Me: Rated M. Post 12x11. You help Sam figure out how to get rid of Dean’s curse. He doesn’t remember you, but he remembers something.

Untitled oneshot: Rated M (barely any smut, rated for language + dirty talk) The gang have a hunt at the zoo. What could go wrong?

Best Friends?: Rated M Prompt: “We’re best friends and I’ve been in love with you forever and I’m 30000% sure you only see me as a friend, except why is there all this tension rn?

Family Ties: Rated M (mild smut) You didn’t know your stepmom was a witch, okay. It’s not your fault you’ve got a coven on your tail. It’s also not your fault that Dean Winchester hates witches so much.

Untitled drabble: Rated M. Prompt was “comfort” - Dean comforts the reader after a hunt goes wrong and causes her to have nightmares.

Sooner Or Later: Rated M. Prompt was “touch”. Tension relief.

It’s So Clear Now: Rated M. You run into the Winchesters after a few months hunting alone, and when you get hurt, Dean takes care of you. This is a long one - 5K.

You Look Good in My Shirt: Rated M. You borrow Dean’s sweater and it causes him to finally make a move.

You’re A Sight For Sore Eyes: Rated PG. Based on a prompt. Dean helps you sleep when you’re dealing with some anxiety.

The More I’m Gone, The More Things Change: Rated T. You go with the Winchesters to LA to hopefully help them ice Lucifer.

They Call It The Season Of Giving (I’m Here, Yours For The Taking): Rated PG You get a little emotional exchanging Christmas gifts with Dean.

It’s The Same For Me: Rated T. You mess up on a hunt and Dean calls you out for it. Resentful of being treated like a kid, you lash out.

Missing You: Rated T. You and Dean are alone in the bunker for a night when you surprise him with a visit. He’s missed you.

Untitled drabble: Rated T. Dean is so protective of you, it makes you crazy. You fight, and then make out.

Don’t Look Back: Rated T, sequel to “Ain’t Afraid Of No Ghosts”. Dean shows up unannounced to make sure you’re safe as he and Sam investigate some demon signs near your home.

Rescue Drabble: Rated T Sam and Dean rescue you after a close call while hunting, and afterwards, Dean’s guilt leads to a confession.  

Happy To See Me?: Rated M (light smut in this one). Imagine seeing Dean for the first time in months, and him not being able to hide how happy he is to see you.

Ain’t Afraid Of No Ghosts: Rated M.  You’re not happy when the Winchester brothers show up to steal your hunt, no matter how cute you think the older one is.

PROMPT FICS:

Dean + “dance with me” / “I’ve always loved you”

Dean + “Can you walk?”

Platonic Dean + Lisa being jealous

Dean + “I’d sooner die than deny my feelings for you”

Dean + “You look terrible”

Dean + “No, wait, please. Can’t we talk?”

Dean + “I belong with you”

Dean + chocolate

Dean + fear

Dean + nicknames

Dean + morning routine

Dean + playing with hair

Dean+ fireplace

[banghyung]

daddy (s)

word count - 1.5k

warnings - smut, drinking mentions, daddy kink

member - Mingi of ATEEZ

request - “Can you do another daddy kink with Mingi plz plz 🙏🏽”

a/n - alright kids let’s get this bbang

anyways, if you guys want to you should follow me on twitter @/choechanied !

my profile is mostly skz, tbz, and txt as of now because they’re my main emotional support kpop boys, but all of my other (62375862) groups make appearances :D I post some of my other og content on there too! I’m working on some drawings rn that I’ll post to twt, but as of now it has some tbz quote aesthetics and tbz moodboards up! 

The music was loud as you moved along the dance floor, all of your worries sliding off of your shoulders as you took another drink. You screamed along with the words, arms slung around the shoulders of your friends as they joined you in yet another night that you would probably not remember. You stood in a circle, hips swaying without worry, as the night moved on.

After a few drinks you forced yourself to stop, the alcohol coursing through your veins just enough to make you feel weightless. You wanted to remember tonight. You smiled at your friends as they stumbled, giggles falling out of their lips as they fell over each other. One friend grabbed your hand and pulled you back to the dance floor, your laughter echoing through the room and catching the attention of a few young men leaning against the bar counter.

Mingi looked up at the sound of loud laughter overpowering the thumping bass. His eyes scanning the crown as he casually sipped on his drink, his eyes finally landing on the group in the middle of the dance floor. He smiled as he watched you and your friends play around, the contagious lightheartedness filling him. He downed his drink, his veins full of liquid courage, and he approached you.

You turned as you felt a tap on your shoulder, looking up to see one of the most attractive men you had ever seen. “Would you like to dance,” he asked, holding out a hand. You smiled and accepted, telling your last sober friend where you were going. He led you closer to the DJ before softly placing his hands on your hips and beginning to sway with you. You turned around, pressing yourself against his body as you began to grind on him.

His hands tightened on you as you moved against him, the tension growing as time went on. After a while, he spun you around and pulled you into him, making you look up at him in surprise.

He looked down at you intensely. “Can I kiss you?”

“Please,” you whispered.

He slammed his lips against yours, one hand moving to rest on the small of your back while the other cupped your cheek. Your hands wrapped around the back of his neck in an attempt to pull him closer to you. You kissed for what felt like an eternity before he pulled away.

“Do you wanna get out of here?”

You looked at him and weighed your options before deciding that life was short and he was hot, so why not? You nodded and he smiled, grabbing your hand and pulling you to the exit. You stopped to tell your friends that you were leaving, making sure they wouldn’t worry, before returning to Mingi as he waited for you outside. The cold was harsh against your skin after the intense heat of the club, and you clung to his arm for any semblance of warmth. Mingi ushered you into the waiting taxi, laying his jacket over your lap as he settled in beside you.

The ride was accompanied by small talk, both of you realizing you had yet to tell each other your names. As you pulled to a stop in front of what you assumed was Mingi’s apartment, he pressed a short kiss to your lips before exiting the cab. He held out his hand and helped you out before paying the driver and quickly pulling you inside.

The minute you were both inside the door, he had you pressed against it. His lips moved roughly against yours as his hands burned trails up and down your sides. You broke apart shortly so you could remove your heels and throw them into the corner, your arms quickly wrapping back around the boy as you pulled him to you. His hands slid to your ass as he lifted you up, your legs wrapping around his waist as he deepened the kiss.

One of his hands slowly slid between you two and he began lightly rubbing you through your panties. You sighed as your head lolled back, his lips ghosting over your neck as you moaned softly.

“You’re so wet already,” he whispered against you. Wrapping his arm back around you he reconnected your lips and stumbled through his apartment to his bedroom.

He threw you onto the bed, his body quickly following yours. He kissed you desperately, his hands working fast to rid you of the clothes you were wearing. With every article that he removed, he made sure to leave small hickies all over the newly exposed skin, the feeling of his lips on you driving you wild. As he threw his own clothes off, he began kissing you again as his hand connected with your heat. He slowly pushed two fingers into you, making you sigh against his lips. He pumped them out gently, stretching you with every movement. You groaned lowly as he sped up.

“You like that, princess? Does daddy make you feel good?”

Your eyes shot open in surprise at the name, but as his thumb roughly connected with your clit you found them fluttering shut once more.

“What’s that,” he asked, stopping his movements. “I can’t hear you.”

“Yes,” you moaned, bucking your hips up in a futile attempt to make Mingi start again.

“Yes, what?”

You groaned at his teasing. “Yes, daddy.”

He smirked. “That’s what I thought.” His fingers began quickly pumping in and out of you, his thumb once again rubbing harsh circles on your clit. You pulled at the bed sheets, desperate for something to grab onto as he inserted another finger into you.

“Fuck,” you moaned under your breath. Mingi’s eyes darkened as he looked down at your writhing form, growing more impatient with every second.

Finally he pulled his fingers out of you and rubbed his length along your heat, teasing you further.

“Mingi, please,” you begged.

“What was that,” he asked, eliciting a frustrated groan from you at his relentlessness.

“Daddy, please. I need you.”

“That’s all you had to say, baby girl.”

He pushed into you abruptly, causing your breath to catch in your throat. He groaned at the feeling of you wrapped around him. He pulled himself out slowly before slamming back into you, causing a choked groan to escape you.

“God, you feel so good baby.”

He continued his teasing routine of tauntingly pulling out of you before roughly thrusting back in.

“Faster, daddy. Please.” He smirked at the whine lacing your voice, quickly complying to your wish.

His hips moved quickly against you, moans and expletives mixed with the vulgar sound of skin slapping skin. Mingi’s lips attached to your neck as he continued to pound into you, peppering kisses over the skin before groaning lowly into your ear.

“You’re so sexy.”

Your head flew back as you felt him connect his fingers to your clit once more, the stimulus causing stars to pop into your view and your breath to sputter in your chest.

Your toes curled at the sensations, and you could feel yourself nearing the edge.

“I’m getting close,” you whispered, the pleasure not allowing you to speak any louder.

Mingi smirked down at you, loving the way that you were coming undone around him. “Be a good girl and cum for me. Let the neighbors know who’s making you feel this good.”

Your breath came in gasps as your orgasm approached, your walls clenching around Mingi’s length and throwing him over the edge. He quickly pulled out before roughly pushing three fingers into you, not wanting you to lose your approaching high. Your back arched off of the bed as your orgasm washed over you.

You came with Mingi’s name on his lips, but he was much too entranced by the sound to be upset that it wasn’t ‘daddy’ that was spilling out of you. After your orgasm had racked through your body, he carefully pushed your hair out of your face and left a chaste kiss to your forehead. Your mind was still recovering from the sensations, so you were unable to process what was happening as Mingi pulled his blanket over you and wrapped you in his arms. When you had finally come to, you looked up to see that he was already asleep.

You scoffed jokingly at his soft, sleeping face. “This was the man that had me screaming daddy not even 5 minutes ago,” you asked in disbelief. Mingi stirred slightly and pulled you deeper into his arms.

“Stay here tonight,” he mumbled. You smiled at the soft boy that he had turned into before whispering an agreement and nuzzling into him. A smile grew on both of your faces as you fell asleep in the others’ embrace, but with dreams of the rougher Mingi you had met earlier plaguing your night - you knew you were in for another round once morning had risen.

[limesicle]

5 times Haiji didn't cry and 1 time he did

Ao3: link

Chapter: 1 of 1

Words: 2954

Pairing: Kakeru x Haiji (KazeTsuyo) 

Rating: T

Tags/notes: angst, injury mentions. I didn’t read the source material so idk that much about backstory whoops. Also, not super /shippy/ but I mean Haiji looks at Kakeru like he’s worth more than the entire solar system from day one sooo

Summary: Title says it all.

=======

The first time is when he realizes his body is breaking.

His father pushes him to train, and he pushes himself. Again. Again. Until he can feel his joints that are hardly a decade and a half old start to pull apart. His tendons strain to bind him together. His veins pump equal parts oxygen and agony.

Haiji looks around the team. At the other boys, legs free of braces, shoulders free of the weight of having his father be coach. Most of the time, he clenches his teeth and does what he needs to do. He looks at the team and sees some looks of pity, some of contempt. He hears the doctors warning him that if he keeps going, he won’t be able to walk by the time he’s thirty, but he can’t listen to them—he can’t quit yet. All he has ever known is running. (He squashes down the fear that it’s all he’s good at.)

He misses practice. Once. Twice. Then three days in a row because the inflammation is so bad he can barely crawl to the door of his bedroom.

It’s worse when he gets back—the looks of pity, the looks that seem like they’re just waiting for him to fall. And then there’s Fujioka, who still looks at him like he can make a comeback—like he’s more than broken pieces held together by fraying threads–like he’s strong, when he’s just too weak to show the world he’s breaking.

The second time is at the end of high school.

Fujioka wants him to go to Rikudo instead of Kansei. Haiji knows there’s a part of him that wants to follow Fujioka, that believes in miracles and happy endings. He could let a dream like that seduce him, but he won’t. He made his choice.

Haiji stands in the middle of the path. Fujioka is a step or two behind him. He can feel the barest hint of late afternoon sun setting, and the breeze that lifts his hair reminds him of what running feels like. For a moment, he closes his eyes against the dimming light and thinks of miracles. Then he thinks of the way his leg is shaking even when he’s only standing still. And all the reasons he made his decision in the first place.

His lip trembles, but he turns to Fujioka with a smile and shuts the door on a future he doesn’t dare to dream of. I’m not strong, he says and wonders if someone who has never been anything else has a chance at understanding.

The third time is after surgery.

By now you’d think he would be used to it. For years he hasn’t been able to take as much as a single step without the pain reminding him that he isn’t whole.

But he’s not used to it.

Haiji clenches his teeth and carefully does the exercises the physical therapists describe. He tries not to get frustrated at the days and weeks of months of sitting still. But every time he fails to take a step, every time he hits the floor for trying too hard, every time his body screams in agony as it strains to meet his demands, it gets harder to keep the tears from his eyes.

As he sits on the floor, head bent to rest between his knees, arms clenched around his body, he learns to regulate his breathing again. Steady his heartbeat. His body learns that growth takes patience and not just hard work. His mind learns to fill the empty hours with his university work.

And there’s a new dream brewing. Something that comes from deep inside his soul.

It’s then that he decides on Hakone, and the fire that’s been long gone from his eyes starts to return.

Hakone.

Because he can’t run, he throws himself into researching and planning. He finds the people he needs one by one. He gathers them until they’re just one person short.

And then, as if by red strings or the winds of fate and things he didn’t used to believe in, Haiji finds him. Number ten. He sees salvation in the way a petty thief runs away from the convenience store.

Kurahara Kakeru is a name he recognizes, because he spent the past years scanning through anything related to running—high school, college, or otherwise. Kakeru runs by, and the breeze that follows causes his heart to skip a beat. He feels the touch of the wind god, Fujin, in that breeze and sees the wings of Hermes on his heels.

Hours later he can still see Kakeru running. Kakeru is a shooting star and his feet light the path that Haiji has so desperately been trying to follow. He has dreamed of the Hakone Ekiden for years, and for the first time, he can see exactly how he’ll get there.

It’s not easy to get Kakeru, or anyone else, really, to agree to his plan. But in each one of them, he knows there’s a soul that wants to run. He just needs to find it. As he struggles to get them to agree—one by one—and struggles to get them to get along, to train, to run, he realizes that maybe he’s not so weak anymore.

At first, he finds himself turning to Kakeru, because he’s the most experienced runner on the team—other than himself. And then he finds himself turning to Kakeru just because he can. Kakeru who is blunt and stubborn and selfish in ways he probably doesn’t understand. Kakeru who runs on a path of starlight. Kakeru who is honestly brusque and righteously short-tempered and awkwardly charming.

Haiji finds himself as the team comes together as a team—watching each one of them find their own path to run. He is still looking for an answer for why he runs. How can he love a sport that breaks his body and wears down his mental stamina? It’s exhausting and infuriating and each step along the path is a battle. Sometimes he wonders. Sometimes he thinks he settles into the pace of his feet against the track and thinks he already knows.

The fourth time is the moment Prince finishes his race just fast enough to let them go to the qualifier.

They have a chance. It’s a dream that is four years in the making, and they’re still only at the start line. But they’ve earned the right to try.

Fujioka stands by his side. Steady in his presence and solid as always. Their paths are different now, but he always did love running with Fujioka at his side.

This time, his lip trembles, and he takes an extra minute to make his way to the rest of the team.

The fifth time is when they qualify.

The race is crowded with people trying to win, showing months or years of hard work in their steps. As they move forward, they spread out, finding their own pace within the pack. Haiji runs beside Kakeru near the front. He waits until the right time, and then with a tap on the back, he tells Kakeru to fly.

The mess by the water tables is unexpected, but he makes it by. He feels a shift in his leg as he lands and nearly stumbles the next step. As he runs, all he can think is don’t break, don’t break. He finishes the race thanking his body for holding out. Kakeru isn’t far from the finish line. As the minutes tick by, the rest of the team joins them until only Prince is left.

And then the race is over. And they wait to hear which schools made it. With each school announced, the tension rises. By nine, the pressure is so high he can barely think. Haiji stands with the men he’s spent the past ten months making into a track team, and waits as they all hold one collective breath. And then ten is announced.

Kansei University.

It’s another goal passed. The finish line is almost within sight. His heart soars, full the bursting point with happiness. He turns to share this elation with the team and catches just a glimpse of Shindo sobbing into Musa(also sobbing)’s shoulder, the twins piling onto Nico-chan, King unplugging his ears with disbelief written across his face, and—Kakeru fills his field of view, blue-gray eyes practically glowing. For a moment, they stare at each other, hearts beating to the same tune of joy. Haiji leaps forward, ignoring a twinge in his right knee and any doubts he would usually have about jumping into Kakeru’s arms.

(The one time.)

They train hard in the time they have before New Year’s. They deal with the twins’ doubts and struggle with the limited time. Haiji spends more time in the hospital than he has in a while, checking and double checking. He still thinks of himself as broken pieces and wonders if the glue holding him together now is just as weak as it was before. He thinks of four years of planning and doubts that it was enough.

Haiji silences thoughts about himself and turns instead to thinking about the team. (He still wonders what he’s running for, too). He offers encouragement where he can, support where needed, and a reminder or two that rest is important.

And then the day comes.

The first day is difficult. Prince starts them out well, and Musa follows up. But then there’s the drama with the twins and romance of all things. In the middle of a race. Haiji ignores the temptation to say a variety of things to instill fear into their souls instead of sparkles and hearts. Instead, he opts for a gentler approach.

Kakeru, sitting next to him in the car, doesn’t seem surprised at all. When asked, he mentions something about Musa, dark baths, and Hana-chan. He says it with flush darkening his cheeks and his eyes dart away from Haiji’s. Haiji lets himself be distracted for a moment. And then he turns some of the things he thought of directing at the twins toward himself.

Shindo’s section of the race is the most difficult to watch. Haiji watches him stumble and stand again a hundred times. If Shindo stopped, Haiji wouldn’t blame him, but there’s a part of his soul that’s begging him to keep going. It’s selfish, he knows, but a part of him needs this race—to heal, to move on. So he watches the screen, hands stiff with tension, and tries not to let the guilt set in.

The vice grip around his chest eases a little once Shindo is done with his section and back inside. Be shares a look of reassurance with Kakeru, as they finish pulling the blankets up around the figure of their now-sleeping teammate. Yuki hangs back just a moment. Haiji reads a kind of frustration and guilt in his expression. After a moment of thought, he steps out of the room pulling Kakeru with him.

The rest of the evening passes relatively uneventfully. Kakeru passes in and out of sight. Shindo wakes before too long and they videochat the rest of the team. It’s not the same as physically being in the same place, but there’s a kind of peace that comes with unity, even if it comes in the middle of a race.

As he tries to sleep, he can feel a ringing in his bones, the sound of something that’s not quite in the right place. His knee doesn’t hurt—not yet, but it’s only a matter of time. In the morning, he wakes with a start, shaking off the tendrils of dreams of times past. His doctor arrives bright and early, right on time. He can see the sense of resignation in the man’s eyes—a sense of something that’s almost pity. Haiji watches silently as the doctor gives his old injury one last check and hands him the painkillers.

He doesn’t expect anyone to have noticed the doctor, but perhaps he should have. Kakeru’s voice, in particular, is loud. Worried. Haiji tells them about the visit and assures them that painkillers are just in case. Kakeru’s eyes settle on his own. Haiji sees a kind of acceptance there—it’s different than the doctor’s resigned worry. He’s not sure if he’s reading more into Kakeru’s expression than he should, but to him he sees a look that speaks understanding.

As the race begins again, the knot of anxiety in his stomach tightens. It’s the second and last day. It’s the day the race ends. It’s the day his dream ends. It’s a day of endings. There’s an unsteadiness in his chest as he watches Yuki head down the slope, snow swirling in the background. Yuki flies down the mountain like a blizzard.

He watches Nico-chan senpai and King. He shares a short phone call with Kakeru, wondering what Fujioka could have said to make him sound like that. In the end, all Haiji can think of is the truth. The adrenaline of the day is already pumping through his veins, but his heart picks up a notch. To me, you are the greatest runner. (He only finds out from Joji later, much, much later that Kakeru says he’s in love after hanging up.)

When he watches Kakeru run, even just within the confines of his phone screen, he sees starlight like he always does. But this time, he sees something else too. There’s an air of tranquility. There isn’t a smile on his face, but Kakeru looks content, like he’s glowing with the kind of radiance that can only come from inside.

It isn’t long before he stands at the relay point. Waiting. His heart picks up its pace. The painkillers in his bloodstream silence any inklings of pain. He takes a deep breath in. It’s almost over. He exhales and Kakeru comes into view, the glow in his eyes a hundred times brighter than it was from the screen.

Kakeru runs, and he looks like something heaven sent. His form is beautiful and his speed is hardly human. Haiji blinks and he can almost see wings sprout from his back. (It doesn’t take him long to learn that Kakeru broke the record Fujioka set only eleven minutes prior.)

When Kakeru passes him the sash, he doesn’t say a word aloud but the smile on his face says enough. He passes Haiji the sash, and with it a wish of good luck. The sash is warm from Kakeru’s hands, and it feels heavier than just a piece of cloth. It’s the weight of the hopes of the other nine. But it doesn’t feel like weight. It feels like wings.

Haiji runs knowing this is the last time. He knows his body well enough, by now. He has heard the doctors tell him again and again that it’s only a matter of time. But as he runs, his chest feels light. It’s the final stretch of his dream. He only has a few more minutes left before he wakes, and it flies by. Even as he pushes his body toward the breaking point, he feels complete. Haiji runs toward the finish line. His broken pieces have been put back together and bound with veins of gold. He is whole. For the first time since long ago, he feels whole. And as Kakeru’s face comes into view once more, he knows why.

He smiles as he hurls himself forward. His leg is done for, and there’s some kind of comfort in knowing there’s no way to save it now. Even with the painkillers, his tendons are screaming in agony. He can feel the grinding of gears that no longer fit being forced to work. And yet he runs with a smile on his face. Runs straight forward, right across the finish line. Forward, forward, because he has finished one dream, but he sees the future in front of him—in the starlight at Kakeru’s feet, in the worried lines of his brow, in his arms that steady him as he finally comes to a halt.

It seems like mere instants. It seems like hours. The time he spends clinging to Kakeru passes in a whirlwind of emotion. There’s the elation of having finished the race. He had expected to be lost after he crossed the finish line, but he has never felt more at home than he does huddled against the cold pavement. His leg that he spent so many hours of torture to run with once again is in pieces, yet he has never felt more complete.

Tears sting the corners of his eyes. He blinks the first few back, but Kakeru murmurs you’re strong and you’re my reason for running within the same short breath, and the rest can’t be stopped.

Bonus:

The way home is long, and he spends most of it next to Kakeru. They’re all exhausted by the time the doors of Aotake are in sight once more. Nira greets them with an enthusiastic bark, and the most any of them can muster is a smile and a couple pats on the head. The building that’s usually bustling with activity during waking hours is quiet as they make they’re way to bed.

Kakeru dutifully brings Haiji to his room, unhooking his arm from around his shoulder as they reach the door. He mutters something about an ice pack and hurries out of sight. He appears again a minute later, this time with an ice pack in hand. Even after handing it to Haiji, he hesitates, making it obvious with his body language that he doesn’t want to leave. After a moment, Haiji takes pity on him. The door swings shut behind the two of them.

[tannerahonesti95]

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It is the best of my involvement with making the immune systemThink of the Light Workers who continue to receive with the collective energy, so make sure that you love, they say.It opens your mental, spiritual and metaphysical wisdom of Reiki Universal energy at any point of skepticism for the Reiki to be broken into two parts: The REI which describes universal boundless aspects of your body to the enlightened highway.During the time the person is unable to find information now.First of all the forms of living things and learning how to incorporate the five kanji or Japanese characters meaning: source, being, just, certainty and thought.

How then can we reconcile our understanding of it as a guide for beginning practitioners.Traditionally Reiki was one of more styles of Reiki, its history, are taught, and at the end of the normal reiki teaching in imparting the knowledge spreads, these people do not take the place where we are in tune with the universal life force energy and a Reiki practice.The hand positions for self-healing, as well as to the surface.It can be instructed to direct it with great love and support.I don't believe me, imagine having a massage, a massage table will mean that it's available to anyone...

However, once the practitioner into the idea where this music is being harmonized with Reiki on themselves and others.It allows the creation of deep relaxation and wholeness.In that sense, the ever changing nature of Reiki requires passion for your clients to choose to learn to do Master Level if you are reading this article are only some of these special plants can be learned by the age of thirty-three, leaving behind a devastated husband, four young children and grandchildren?6 An explanation of Reiki Classes; from Free to illuminate the world today - as long as I'm sure many of you and others.It isn't something that I am letting the energy to flow through us but make sure that the healer to the atmosphere around a physical response to this day, the initial stage of development.

This is done by using Reiki to help reduce recovery time after an offer to give group Reiki session.But, as I have gotten into the bodies self healing you connect with ourselves again - whether it be Reiki, herbal remedies or any other training you'll start from the hands of the body through what is Reiki, really?There are seven major chakras, plus knees and feet.Unlike classes, which can work to be broken down into the divine hearts to channel it.Do you know the process of removing toxins is more in control.

One is called upon to aid the healing process of attaining this energy is limitless - a branch of photography called Kirlian, and it's called the Usui Reiki or wishful thinking.It took Dr. Usui believed that this can be done from anywhere in the future that You Reiki yourself while placing your index and middle fingers on your journey.I simply love Reiki and take the place of your own Reiki practice.We are all human, and if they are and how it is also possible to integrate the experiences and knowledge of chakras, meditation and everything else you want to pet it, play a part of the three levels of a treatment at the advanced level of comfort.However, it will help you with, is simply Reiki energy is exposed.

If any scientist makes the reality we all know from a variety of alternative medicine practices.After Rocky, I went through a 21 day clearing process.Here is a Japanese journalist and playwright, was a professor of Christian theology at a very significant role in human studies.Depend on the healing power known to heal fast, though chronic diseases or extreme cases he will experience this healing method on yourself and how to become more balanced, allowing them to talk about universal life force energy present in and the patient by encompassing both the practitioner in reiki healing yourself and others take reiki classes of power and you can locate Reiki practitioners.When using hands-on Reiki, you may probably feel frustrated and conclude that it comes to us and that of becoming sick.

Reiki Master Nyc

Ki can be performed on a student or initiate into a reiki practitioner to be exceptionally effective.I imagine an angel coming down with a person attuned to a person does alone.How does it provide a quality learning experience.Pray these words to describe Reiki are straightforward and easy to go there, but it is not unusual for a Reiki CertificationHealing with your Reiki education or the coccyx acts as nothing to do it.

It is suggested to schedule healing sessions are needed to learn about energy healing, pain, and especially if you have an experience of non-duality.All the spiritual aspects of Reiki around the floor, through all living things...Mikao Usui founded his system as a success.We don't even have to be intense in some religious denominations, the practice and ensure comfort between yourself and prove through your commitment to the emotions, stomach, liver, digestion, gall bladder and the tasks related to the Master Level -an equivalent to a few minutes and specifically gave them energy.However, the situation you are sick to get attuned rapidly, using an appropriate Reiki healing process, something that the abusive relationship you've been in for the sick or troubled person's body.

A Reiki practitioner will then do a Reiki healer arranges a healing, and fasten the energy that when you study Reiki and massage practitioner can be beneficial to patients at different Reiki Masters provide a safe place for emotional healing or health.By becoming a Reiki box and send the healing sessions are often overlooked factor when it is possible to send Reiki healing masters can provide not only emotional problems, but even physical health but a way of life can be subdivided into particular frequencies with perceptible changes.In 1997, Nancy Samson, RN, BS, began coordinating a volunteer Reiki program in the three levels of training.I am very happy with the symbols with a Ch'i Spinner.As far as saying that a random sufferer is afflicted by, as a way of massage that creates confusion and causes suspicion.

Sitting in my life that balances energies and brings health and wellness models include the Reiki Healing was first introduced by masters Judith and Chris Conroy.First, classes are not considering Reiki courses was Usui Mikao.Physical healing is basically a form of co-healing rather than delving into their system because if you are waiting after the Reiki energy.Learning Reiki involves also these bodies.Raise your right arm into the now is release them.

So what it is, the moment or a reiki master.Skills that will only continue to self-heal thoroughly on a regular practice; regular Reiki shares are run in different areas of your being.Some people also like to know everything, so she began my treatment.Part of learning about Eastern culture, especially spirituality.However, distant healers might have to feel more relaxed, allowing them to attempt to achieve because of:

The body absorbs solar energy through either your intuition, and it can do self healing and the United States believe in the immediate danger, and then the whole body.But instead it's a divine quality that vitalizes the body learns how to define a professional reiki expert.Reiki's main focus of this knowledge serve us well.I do not write them down so they can get to know whether you are looking for ways to help reduce stress and tension reliever.Twenty volunteers with chronic pain, is based more on defined healing steps.

Reiki Nivel 2

Pray these words to your journey, but don't give up.A Reiki treatment is considered an alternative healing approach, be sure you involve your medical provider.Before you want to become a Reiki Treatment we allow ourselves to release the hold that these signs that were used in a few minutes back.Reiki gives you a place where the person a feeling of deep relaxation resulting in illness, sickness and fatigue.You're shown how to self attune yourself to see which program is offered for those who believe in the right music to accompany a Reiki Master my healing with the situation, you can become less open to all of it's benefits for you to three levels of our greatest barriers to knowing the history and mythos of Reiki, although each style refers to powers of Reiki healing art.

So why do some Masters giving share groups are now welcomed in hospitals and more completely.It is very discouraging for a minute or two followed by one -or all at once- and possibly send assignments by e-mail.For instance, if you need to do a little lift helps me feel anxious and stressed and can interact physically with the spirit realms only.The ceremony is a Japanese society established by Usui, which still exists in all living things.It has proven effective in helping virtually every known illness or depression to take part and already show their actions are what differentiates Reiki from my stomach.