#and that's ''gosh damn humans have to eat a lot. we gotta do that every day. multiple times. it's such a constant thing''

[simptasia]

personally i don’t think anything should cost money. if it were up to me, we’d star trek this shit up and do away with that needless cause of so much suffering

however. bare min? we should at least make it so things that humans (and animals) literally need to live? that should be free. so that would be: food, water, medicine, housing, and the means for temperature control

those five things, at the very least, should be an undeniable right to all living beings. the fact that so many people can’t wrap their minds around that baffles me. and tells me my dream of No Money is a long way away

[moonbaby26]

(gif from Jason Passaro’s youtube edit here)

Title: One Shitty Friday Night (Part 1)

Pairings: Peter Maximoff x Fem!Reader, Colossus x Shadowcat

Summary: Set after the events of Deadpool 2, you and your boyfriend Peter are on a double date downtown with your fellow X-Men Piotr Rasputin (Colossus) and Kitty Pryde (Shadowcat) when Deadpool and Russell arrive unexpectedly. Chaos and violence naturally ensues, including taking down mafia henchmen, dealing with news media and paparazzi who circle in with the action, and a jealous Peter. This will be concluded in Part 2 with the mixed reactions of Logan, Charles, and Erik when you all bring Wade and Russell back home, etc. 😄

Notes: For simplicity’s sake as Piotr R. is normally called “Peter” as well, he’ll just be referred to as Colossus here.

Warnings: Some alcohol use. And it’s Deadpool, so a lot of cursing and irreverent jokes of course. This started out as just crack!fic that became actual fic that had to be split into two parts because it hit post limit. Holy cow.

Peter Maximoff x Reader Masterlist

—————————

Kitty all but snorted, trying to put her drink back down on the table before it could end up fully sideways instead as her laughter left her trembling.

Colossus sighed quietly, but you could still see the warmth in his eyes as he looked down at her before helping dab up some of her errant wine off the table with a thick cloth napkin.

It was late Friday night, and save for your semi disapproving, large and very Russian designated driver, the other three of you were now several drinks deep and a bit too loudly enjoying Peter’s retelling of the Led Zeppelin cover band debacle. You’d been there with him that night, but it never got old the way Peter told it.

“I shit you not, and this guy still keeps hitting on Jean.” Peter continued, his third nearly empty glass of craft beer still in hand. “Scott’s about to fry the dude. They’re playing Immigrant Song, and these lasers start up. All dudebros in the club go wild, and Scott tries to sneak off a warning shot. Freaking air balls it! I have to move like forty people and it still blows a damn hole in the wall. But nobody even noticed! Fake Robert Plant is screaming his heart out and everybody is just eating it up. I swear my Dad could have flown in there, cape billowing and they still would have thought it was part of the show!”

You were at risk of being elbowed in this small restaurant booth, with how animated Peter was as he spoke beside you. But you didn’t mind. The lighting was dim, possibly verging on romantic, the smell of good food from the kitchen reminded you of what was to come, and you were just enjoying time with some of your favorite people.

When Peter did finally drop his hand again though, the not so subtle movements of it then up your thigh also promised something much more personal later tonight. Maybe it was the warmth from the mixed drinks you were also nursing, but you shifted your leg a little, pushing even more into his touch under the table. Your movement just signaled your silent agreement to him that tonight would be a perfect night to be throwing clothes on the floor as soon as you got back to your shared room at the mansion.

It’d been a long, tiring week after all. Helping teach classes during the day and training your ass off in the danger room every night, you didn’t think it was unreasonable to cut loose a bit now.

Even Colossus was chuckling a little at last, but the big guy was always softest around Kitty. You in particular had been one of her biggest supporters when she’d first confessed her attraction towards him. You’d noticed his bashfulness with her as well, and all the little glances he’d given her long before she’d ever worked up the courage to ask him out.

But that seemed so long ago now, it was hard to really remember a time when they weren’t together. Almost as long as you and Peter really.

You glanced up as the waiter came back by to check on you all, saying your food would be out in a few more minutes and asking if anyone needed more drinks.

“Oh gosh, we’re really running up the tab right?” Kitty smiled.

You could see the little bit of relief in Colossus’ expression as she waved the waiter off though, her current wine glass still nearly full. “I’m fine for now, thank you.”

Peter glanced at you and you nodded as well. A buzz was fine, but you didn’t want to be climbing the mansion stairs full on drunk tonight. “I’m good.”

As the waiter left, your conversation got a little more subdued. You leaned into Peter somewhat, hip to hip in the booth as he put his arm around your waist.

Kitty was now talking about a movie she thought you should all go see next weekend if you could. You were just in the process of agreeing as you’d wanted to see it too, when Colossus suddenly went stock still, a look of real surprise on his face.

Kitty evidently noticed as soon as you did, you both staring up at him in unison.

“Do not turn around,” He instructed to you and Peter, eyes locked on something behind you.

Of course when told to do one thing, it would take everything in Peter’s willpower to not do the opposite. But to his credit he actually did hesitate. “Do we need to be dodging something? I mean, I can move us if I need to, man. You just gotta let me know.” Peter stated.

“I don’t think he’s seen us yet. Please do not draw attention.” Colossus responded, still frustratingly vague to the rest of you.

But he hadn’t metaled up yet, his skin still entirely human looking. So on the plus side, it couldn’t be someone he thought an immediate physical threat.

You glanced to Kitty for some hope of explanation as she was seated beside Colossus and facing the same direction. But she was too short in comparison to him, and couldn’t see all the way across the booth dividers as easily as he could. “Well who is it?” Kitty demanded quietly.

But you heard an impatient voice carry over clearly from the nearby restaurant entrance.

“Look, you know he’s here. I know he’s here. Don’t make me leave you guys a bad Yelp review. I will totally Karen that shit up. I’m just here for him.” A pause. “...And some of the cannolis. God, I love those things. You went a little scarce on the filling last time though. Don’t make me add that to the Yelp review.”

You heard the hostess stutter, fear evidently building. “Sir, firearms are not allowed in this restaurant. The owner, he, I...I can’t.”

There was a loud sigh from the man, the distinct sound of a gun cocking, and then all hell broke loose.

“WADE!” Colossus screamed, your entire table flipping as he stood up, metal now encasing him in this even larger form.

Abruptly you were now standing back by the entrance yourself. Peter had one arm around you, and the other around Kitty as he let you both go just as instantly, having just brought you there before he disappeared again.

That little flare up of vertigo from the speed and sudden stop didn’t mix well with the alcohol, and she and you both stood there another moment, queasy as Peter appeared again with an armful of guns.

It would have been comical as he clearly had no idea where to put them now, but everyone else that had still been in the restaurant was already screaming and running for the doors in a panic.

The owner of the multiple guns couldn’t care less about the crowd however, only turning his full focus to the lot of you then in exasperation.

“Oh my God, you anti second amendment, mother fuckers. I’m in the middle of a job here!”

“You can’t just point guns at innocent people, Wade! We have talked about this many times!” Colossus retorted, all seven foot of him now standing over Deadpool with paternal like annoyance.

“For fuck’s sake, it’s called a threat. I wasn’t going to kill her you overprotective, asshat! Now Giovanni is probably holed up in some pussy ass panic room, or he’s already ghosted me out the back door! And yes, I know that is such a stereotypical mob boss name and totally sounds like the Pokemon villain. Fuck him and his always trying to take Pikachu! He had a talking cat the whole time who just wanted his love, but no, got to have the electric rat. Fuck!”

“Language, Wade!” Colossus scolded. “There is still a child present!”

And honestly in all this insanity, that was the first time you actually noticed Russell also still standing there. Everyone else in the room had now fled out into the street.

“I’m fucking fourteen,” The boy replied defiantly. “And yeah, we were working!”

“Daddy and angrier metal daddy are just talking, hon.” Deadpool commented, waving a hand.

There was a small gust of air beside you and you looked to Peter knowingly. Wade’s guns were now all on a table, though intentionally still distant from your current position. “So I just made a couple laps.” Peter spoke up. “The cops are already coming, and there’s still a bunch of guys in the basement. They were opening some crates, probably getting weapons? I didn’t know if we were taking them out yet though. I didn’t touch anything. But is Giovanni like a big dude with gold rings and all?”

“I’m telling you besides the drug and human trafficking, it’s practically more criminal how much he sets back Italian-American stereotypes. They are an honest, manicotti making people goddamn it.” Deadpool answered.

You really were starting to regret the amount of drinks you’d had. If you’d known tonight was going to be anything like this, you would have gladly stuck to water. Your head was already trying to throb a little as you finally spoke. “So, does this guy actually have warrants out on him? If the cops come, they’re all going to end up shooting each other most likely. Can we just defuse this by giving him up to them?”

“I would say we assist to prevent unnecessary bloodshed, if that is the case, yes. I’m sure the Professor would prefer that.” Colossus agreed.

“Freaking goody two shoes, all of you.” Wade sighed. “But he has to get arrested or dead okay? I don’t get paid otherwise.” He paused though, then looking back up to Colossus before suddenly elbowing him. As if he’d even really feel that. “And hello rudeness, are you not going to introduce me to your little girls night out club here before we go bust some heads in a gratuitous X-Force/X-Men hotties crossover?”

“X-Force?” Kitty asked, sounding as already over this as could be.

“Well, we are a little empty on the roster at the moment. Some...unfortunate parachuting incidents. Wind advisory that day. You know how it goes.” Deadpool shrugged.

By her expression, no. She did not know how it went.

But the sooner you started, the sooner this could be over. Colossus motioned to each of you in turn, “Peter, (Y/N), and Kitty. These are my teammates and friends.” He nodded back to Deadpool, “And this is Wade.” And then to the boy. “And Russell.”

Of course you already knew who they both were. It’d been a bit of a scandal really, with the whole Essex House fiasco and the deaths that had occurred there. Fair or not, a lot of the blame had ended up on Juggernaut the second time around though you thought. Which is why Charles hadn’t had to deal with too much bad press in the aftermath.

You could not let this become another Essex House situation for the X-Men though. You were about to speak up about heading to the basement together and Deadpool staying out of your way so you all could neutralize everyone without any fatal hits, when he gasped dramatically, making you freeze again.

“Kitty!? Like an actual girl named Kitty? Oh my God, this whole time I thought you were his cat!” He hit his own leg, laughing. “I’m thinking, holy shit this guy loves his goddamn cat, but who am I to judge you know? I had a dog named Mr. Shuggums. Cutest little fucker.” He took a breath. “I miss him.”

“Wade.” Colossus groaned. “We do not have all night.”

Okay, so there was still something sweet about Colossus gushing about his girlfriend even to this manic mercenary. But no kidding, this show really needed to get on the road here.

“Guys, why don’t we just let Peter disarm them all, Colossus, you grab Giovanni, and Kitty and I deal with anyone who still resists? No one has to get hurt, and then it’s all done, easy.”

“And then we go find somewhere else to eat. Killing me here. I wanted that damn calzone and tiramisu.” Peter sighed, pulling his goggles back down over his eyes again. “More guns coming up.”

He disappeared at once, but when he didn’t return immediately as you were so accustomed to, you and Kitty exchanged a nervous look.

And after only another few seconds, your instincts told you something had definitely gone wrong.

“Is the basement directly beneath us?” You asked Deadpool sharply, already reaching out a hand to Kitty. Your adrenaline was starting, all good feelings gone as it was now time to act.

But you’d worked together long enough now, you didn’t have to explain your plan to her or Colossus.

Yet when the previously mouthy merc had no instant response, just staring at you in thought, it was clear he hadn’t done any recon beforehand at all. He’d literally just walked in here and expected everything to work out.

“Perfect.” Kitty said sarcastically, glancing quickly to Colossus as she took your hand. “You’re our backup, dear, in case our vertical entrance doesn’t work out. Come find us.”

“Always.” He said, already turning, his weight shaking the floor as he ran to look for any stairway downward while you and Kitty dropped straight through the floor.

It was surely a risk of its own to use her phasing ability so blindly as this. You could end up in a too small crawlspace, in underground piping, a sewer system, anything really. She’d make sure not to go solid until it was safe, as to not impale or bury you alive of course. But if Peter were in trouble, there was no time to waste by ending up at a dead end and having to go back up and try again.

You’d held your breath, as there was no way for you to process oxygen either as your lungs and every other part of you shifted through the other matter. It was darkness and insulation, pipes, and conduit that flashed by at first. But in the fractions of seconds that it took to fall, you had already powered up. The white light of your energy field overtaking your body, shielding you both as you did fall into a larger open area.

It was even darker than the restaurant above, all concrete and dampness. The glow from your body was the brightest thing there as much more men than you’d expected all turned in surprise. You saw the glint of multiple gun barrels now, but the thing you wanted to see most was Peter’s silver hair as you’d scanned the area for him instantly.

There was a stairwell in the distance. He was laying near the bottom of it. But you had no time to be shocked or afraid, only anger swelled as you released Kitty’s hand, making you solid again. “I’ll get him.” Was all you said. Letting her know to protect herself as you flew to him. Bullets couldn’t hurt her if she was ready for them. But Peter would be defenseless without one of you now, and by means of your power of flight you were the faster of you and her.

The man closest to Peter had a different kind of gun though you realized. Something you didn’t recognize at all as he aimed at you. You splayed your palms to create an energy shield in front of you as he pulled the trigger.

It didn’t make a sound though. But everything around you instantly distorted as pain exploded through you. You saw five or six of him now, as your feet hit the ground, unable to concentrate enough to fly then. But even as you stumbled, realizing your shielding wasn’t fully stopping whatever that weapon was doing, you were still able to expand your shield rapidly, hitting the man with the force of a car in your pain and sending him flying into a nearby wall, the weapon clattering to the ground lightly against his now limp body.

But you still felt like you were going to puke.

“Kill them you idiots!” Someone screamed.

You dropped yourself, laying over Peter just as quickly, grateful to feel him breathing as you focused through the pain to extend a shield around you both as the gunfire started.

“Bitch!” Another man yelled as Kitty just walked unharmed through all the flying bullets towards you.

“Shadowcat actually,” She said, skilled enough in her powers to choose what was solid and what wasn’t. Just the outside of her fist being all she needed to crush his nose in one punch with a squirt of blood, and only the end of her foot used as she swept her leg after to knock his own right out from under him.

Even among your own team, sometimes people could forget that that petite Jewish girl was about as skilled a martial artist as anyone could be.

“Babe?” You heard against your ear though, glancing back down to Peter. There was real relief even in the chaos as you saw him smile up at you.

He talked back against your ear in the noise as Kitty continued to utterly wreck the guys around you. “I fucked up a little, right? That gun...they already had it going, aimed at the door when I came back, a trap...I think I hit every stair on the way down...I still see like three of you right now.”

“Ditto.” You breathed.

And then there was another even louder noise as the remnants of a door also came flying down the stairs. Colossus barreled in behind it like a stampeding elephant, Deadpool right behind him as they leapt over the both of you and joined the fray.

“We found the basement!” Deadpool announced gleefully, swords swinging. “Don’t think they’d even locked the door back actually, but fuck if big Russki doesn’t love a dramatic entrance!”

For a moment you thought all your words about at least trying not to kill had been for nothing, thinking Deadpool was going to chop these men into literal pieces. But even as blood sprayed left and right, you realized he was just cutting tendons. The men then unable to hold their guns, unable to stand at all as he crippled each he reached in succession.

It was still completely horrific, but hell, how much could you really ask for from someone like him? Especially when you yourself had slammed that one man into a concrete wall as if he were a ragdoll. You glanced over anxiously for a moment, glad to see him shifting a little, but still crumpled exactly where you’d thrown him. He was alive, a small relief at least.

——————————

Obviously the other gunmen hadn’t had a prayer either though once you’d all been down there together.

Colossus already had a still cursing Giovanni slung over one shoulder as you were now helping Peter back up and trying not to step in all the blood as you all walked over to Kitty.

“What a mess...very interesting weapon though,” She spoke of that odd gun that’d been used on you and Peter, it now in her hands as she turned it one way and then another examining it. “I’m bringing this back with us. The police don’t need anything like this. Hank and I can figure out how it works. And how to defend against it hopefully before we run into another one of these out in the field.”

“It seems this Giovanni was more a threat than expected,” Colossus said, giving the still squirming man an unhappy look, before looking back to you all. “Are you alright, Peter?”

“I’m still hungry.” Peter grumbled, an arm over your shoulder to still help stabilize him as his other hand went to his head as if it were pounding. He also had some bruising starting on his face, no doubt from his tumble down the stairs. “I wouldn’t have drank so damn much if I’d known we weren’t going to eat...”

With the speed of his metabolism, that alcohol likely was hitting him pretty hard now on his already empty stomach.

“We should turn this guy over and get out of here.” You agreed. Though you didn’t feel so hot yourself. Still a little nauseous from whatever that weapon did to your senses. But at least you weren’t seeing triple of everything anymore.

“Hold it, girl scouts!” Deadpool piped up, chipper as ever as he grabbed something at Giovanni’s neck before any of you could think to stop him.

The man choked just a moment though, before a piece of metal snapped off into Wade’s hands. It was a necklace, with a symbol of some sort. You saw just a glimpse of it before Deadpool pocketed it. “No proof of finishing the job, no payday for DP. No payday, then no liquor, no coke, no hookers. Am I right?”

It was too difficult to tell when if ever he was serious, and you all chose to ignore his comment, starting back up the stairs. The odd sounds of bullet fragments falling back down the stairwell caught Peter’s attention though as he gave a grossed out look to Wade for a moment.

The now impact deformed bullets were starting to work themselves back out of all the bloody holes in Deadpool’s costume. You knew where you’d seen that before of course, but Peter was the only one that actually said it aloud.

“Damn, you and Logan would be a pair.”

There was a pause, and you could swear even with the mask, you thought you saw Wade’s cheekbones move in a way that signaled he was outright grinning from ear to ear. “At least someone gets it. He still won’t return my calls though. Such a diva lately.”

Once you did get to the top of the stairs, you only found a very agitated Russell standing there, Wade’s guns in his arms. “You took long enough, the cops are outside you know. I’m not going back to jail for you!”

“Cool your tater tots, kid.” Deadpool responded lazily, in no hurry, but grabbing the weapons back to holster them all regardless.

“I could have finished this faster! I would have fried their asses!” Russell argued.

“You would have been shot. Fire does not stop bullets.” Colossus only answered matter of factly.

Russell made a face, but Wade cut him off before he could say any more.

“Now now, listen to metal daddy. No sass. And actually, I think there’s something we should talk about, champ. X-Force is way more badass and all, but we don’t exactly have a training and junior member tier yet. Maybe later. You might want to think about riding home with these guys and checking their setup out. I don’t have any powers myself to relate to you like that, except me being very shootable, devastatingly charming, sexy, smart, and a competitive level Skee-Ball player...”

Deadpool sighed, continuing. “But these guys have a Danger Room. Which is totally not a sex dungeon, yeah I was bummed about that too. But they could let you unleash that school shooter level teenage angst and burn all the shit you wanted until you really figure out your powers.”

Russel bristled. “I’m not a school shooter you prick! And you always said the X-Men were neutered dweebs and-”

Wade coughed loudly, ushering Russell forward suddenly as you all continued to walk. “Hah, kids. Such darlings. Mishear everything don’t they?”

Colossus only answered without offense though. “The offer is still open, Russell. Though you have said no before. The Professor would never turn down a young mutant in need.”

It was Peter who surprised you a little, a smirk on his face as he contributed. “Freaking sweet house too, man. Xavier’s loaded. Big screen TV, a pool, basketball court, your own room, supersonic jet. Bunch of cute girls as well, or cute boys, you know whatever you’re into.”

“I’m not gay.” Russell huffed, but actually looked to be listening now as he didn’t immediately spit back with a sarcastic retort.

Though you gave Peter a weird look and he just grinned. “What? I stayed for you didn’t I, babe? Just saying. I wasn’t exactly on board with the whole team thing before that either. I know where he’s coming from is all.”

“It’s up to you, Russell.” Kitty said more diplomatically, before returning to the matter at hand. “We’re parked at that parking garage two blocks south. Everyone meet back there, Colossus and I will hand this guy over to the cops out front. The rest of you, I’m sure there’s got to be some emergency exit you can sneak out of. Probably better to split up actually. Less attention.”

—————————

Just as Kitty had suggested, Deadpool and Russell went out one way, and you and Peter another. You came out onto another street behind the restaurant. And you’d just finally started to relax again, Peter taking your hand in his own and walking away like an honest to God normal couple for once, just out on the town together before you noticed an oddly placed white van with distinct lettering on it.

Peter saw it too just as the light from a camera hit you both.

“Hell,” You breathed.

“Want to run?” He asked seriously.

“Too late, they’d just film us ditching, and say we had something to hide.”

Your headache was returning in full force you thought as you steeled yourself, seeing the reporter now in a full sprint towards you.

“It’s Quicksilver! And (your codename)! The X-Men are here!” A woman shouted.

As you walked closer to the news van, the camera flashes only increased. It looked like a small group of paparazzi had also camped out here, hoping for this exact result. How did word travel so damn fast?

“Marcia Fletcher, WAFN nightly news!” She introduced herself at once, her camera man there just as quickly, huffing a little from the run as he got you both in focus.

You could see the lights on on his camera as she shoved her microphone in front of you and Peter. “You’re on live coverage of the Ruffiano’s restaurant shootings with WAFN. Is it true that Giovani Marcello was apprehended here tonight by the X-Men? And how did you know he was here when he’s been on Interpol’s most wanted list for four years?”

You knew without looking at him that Peter was happily deferring the speaking role to you now as you tried not to look rattled. You attempted to think of what Charles would and wouldn’t want you to say, even with the pain in your head and lingering nausea. “We didn’t know who was here. We were in the area and saw people running and went to help, that’s all.” You lied.

“But the reports of gunshots, witnesses also said Deadpool had drawn a gun on a restaurant employee and Colossus was seen inside. Is Deadpool now affiliated with the X-Men again? Did he shoot anyone?”

“Deadpool is not affiliated with the X-Men. Colossus was here tonight, but he only would have been defending anyone he thought in danger. Deadpool did not shoot anyone.” You tried to keep to short truths that time.

“But then why was Deadpool there? Should people really believe it would be a coincidence that the X-Men and Deadpool would be at the same incidence at one time if not working together?”

“Well you’re here aren’t you? Are you affiliated with us?” You replied before you could stop yourself, though still restraining the annoyance you really wanted to put into that statement. “Trouble attracts a crowd.”

Peter made a sound, a restrained laugh you knew. But before the reporter could blurt out another question, one of the now growing number of paparazzi called out, “(Your codename), hey look here! Is it true you and Quicksilver are still dating!?”

You knew better than to be baited, humoring any of them just made it worse. They were like piranhas. But Peter couldn’t help it, turning to look as so many cameras flashed. His arm slid around you protectively. “Why wouldn’t we be, dude?” He called back.

“Are you saying the photos of (your codename) and Gambit were before you two reconciling?”

It took every ounce of your self control to not respond, but oh God did you want to. It was the mission in Tanzania. You knew it. You, Storm, and Gambit. Peter had stayed in the U.S. for that one as it’d been the holidays and his Mom had wanted both he and Wanda over for some time together.

After the mission was over, the three of you had ended up on one of the beautiful Tanzanian beaches for a single day. Just a single day to yourselves.

You’d had the audacity to wear a revealing bathing suit though and you and Remy had been photographed together, him shirtless of course because it was a goddamn beach. And laughing and smiling because, surprise, you were friends! And they’d cropped Ororo out in all the closeups for complete loss of context.

It’d been a thing in some of the tabloids for a while, but you really thought that had finally blown over. Of course if anyone asked Remy, he liked to play coy on the whole subject to keep up his God’s gift to all men and women sex symbol status.

“Peter, let’s just go,” You whispered in his ear, sure anything else said would only make things worse.

But you could read him all too well, and when he turned his face to look back at you, you already knew what he was going to do. You didn’t try to stop him, because never would you humiliate him on live television with any type of rejection, but oh, you would never live this one down. Never.

He kissed you hard. And there was nothing fake about it, honestly the kind of kiss usually reserved for your bedroom as you felt heat rising up in you. The camera flashes clicking over and over as you could still taste the alcohol he’d drank before.

When he finally released you again, you gasped a little. He gave the photographers a ‘fuck you’ look, before speaking just to you. “Now we can go.”

“Fly or run?” You breathed.

“Fly please. I’m still about half out of it.” He admitted.

You powered up to some surprised and excited sounds from the crowd. Your whole body glowing white again in the energy you emitted.

“Wait, aren’t you going to stay and talk to the police!?” The reporter shouted.

“They know where to find us if they need us.” You answered, extending your energy field around Peter, before you took off vertically, making sure to get sideways over the rooftops as soon as you could though to breakup their camera angles and finally give you privacy again at last.

You landed gently atop the parking garage only a few moments later, letting him go again as you powered back down.

“Are you mad at me?” He asked, just taking your hand again though.

“No.” You said truthfully. “But, I have no idea what we’ve really just done. We still have to go home...home where the Professor always watches the 10:00 news with his late night tea.”

Peter sighed, only half joking. “We could always go stay with my Mom for a while?”

You just moved in closer, pulling him against you as you laid your head on his shoulder. “We’ll survive, babe. Somehow we always do.”

“I think that says more about you than me though. Pretty sure I’d be face down in a ditch somewhere already if it weren’t for you.”

You chuckled, wrapping your arms around his neck then before raising your head back up to kiss him once more. Much softer this time, and even longer than his jealous little display a few minutes ago.

He made one of his little noises of contentment, hands sliding down to squeeze your butt through the thin pants you were wearing. As he pulled your hips tighter against him, he broke the kiss enough to speak regretfully. “I really was hoping to get lucky tonight...”

“Same.” You smiled. It had been a while. Mostly from you both being so tired by the time you finally got in bed. Passing out on each other had more been the norm the past couple weeks. “We get some food in you, and see where things go?”

“Gross! Get a room!”

You startled at the sudden shouting, having wholly thought yourselves alone up here in the moonlight.

Peter rolled his eyes, yelling back at Russell, “Kid, we have one! And we’d already be back there by now if it wasn’t for your little mafia hunting shenanigans!”

You looked over to see Deadpool and Russell both standing in the doorway to the parking garage stairs.

Wade whistled, leaning back against the doorframe. “Way to take down that Marcia Fletcher a notch! I always found her too uppity to be honest. I think she’s still butt hurt that they didn’t give her the lead anchor spot when Carl Sanderson moved to the early bird morning show. Tanya Meyer on the 5:00 news though, that’s my girl.”

You blinked. “How...how do you know-” It was literally minutes ago, it would have taken them just this long to walk here.

Deadpool lifted up his cell phone. “Facebook live, bitches. Don’t you follow WAFN? The recipes they post from Saturday morning cooking with Pat are always delish.” He looked back down at the phone though, happily reading. “Hah! Peggy Fredrickson from Brewster, New York thinks Marcia’s contouring and drawn on eyebrows are getting worse. Fire your makeup person, Marcia.” He tapped something on the screen. “Like comment! Oh, and Michael Morris from Ridgefield says who wouldn’t do Remy LeBeau. Damn, Michael, all out and proud on main.”

Peter let go of you, taking an annoyed breath. But then looking back to you. “Please let me at least prank Remy, something, anything.”

“But he didn’t do anything.” You replied, though only more stressed now that this was already blowing up on social media.

“Exactly! He should have at least denied it! But no, Mr. cool Cajun can’t admit that you’d actually choose me over him.”

“Hey now, I think you’re looking at this the wrong way, Quickie.” Deadpool interjected. “There’s always the ménage à trois option. I mean he’s French right? And Michael from Ridgefield is just spitting truth. Who wouldn’t want to do Remy LeBeau? He could shuffle my cards anytime.”

“You guys are so fucking weird.” Russell groaned. “Can we go find your damn car now?”

But you didn’t move yet, still looking fully at Peter. “Wade’s just trying to get under your skin. We all know how Remy is. He’d flirt with a piece of cardboard if it suited him. It doesn’t mean anything to him.” You recognized that Gambit was physically attractive of course, you had eyes too after all. But that was the only extent of it. You loved Peter. Not to mention you wouldn’t at all want to get on Rogue’s bad side. She and Gambit were tumultuous enough without someone else being added to the mix.

“This is adorable, really. But I did bring ‘good job team for sending a little girl selling, gentrification funding, pencil dick mob boss to butt fucking federal prison’ cannolis. Want some?” Deadpool offered, lifting up a large takeout box you somehow hadn’t noticed before.

Peter’s shoulders dropped a little, still heavily annoyed though eyeing the box. “So does this mean you’re coming back with us too?”

Wade shrugged, “The kid doesn’t know you guys. What kind of daddy would I be if I didn’t at least go and make sure he actually wanted to stay in your little mutant commune before I ditch him there?”

“You aren’t my damned dad.” Russell said, though almost sounding too tired to argue further at this point. He reached up, taking a cannoli from the box and biting into it as he started to walk back down the stairwell. “What floor is the car on?”

“Just one down from here, you already passed it. Black SUV,” you answered. Colossus and Kitty must not have been here yet if Wade and Russell had made it all the way to the top deck without finding them.

Peter grabbed your hand again, walking with you to the doorway as he grabbed three cannolis out the box begrudgingly with his other hand. He passed one off to you, before biting into the other two in quick succession.

And you only had a moment to see all the thick scarring under Wade’s mask as he lifted it just enough to start eating one himself, before turning to follow you both out and down the stairwell.

———————————

(Concluded in Part 2 here)

[ramp-it-up]

Fresh Squeeze, Chapter 7

Pairing: Daveed Diggs x OFC Linden Marshall

Set in 2023, post-pandemic

Warnings: Lots of pics, Cursing, Angsty Angst, Mention of Death, Lots of Plot, Anthony Ramos, Afro Samurai, Clothes altering, SMUT: Fingering, Thumb sucking, Fluff. 18+.

Word Count: 6.6 K 

Plot: Linden Marshall just finished law school at Columbia University in NYC. Daveed Diggs is still creating magic with his platonic life partner Rafael Casal and nursing his broken heart post pandemic. 

Linden’s boyfriend WAS Mark Monaco, movie star.  They were together for years, and her trauma and his addictions were chaotic. She knows now that wasn’t love. 

Read the Previous Chapter.

--------

Thursday night/Friday, May 6-7, 2023

After Daveed heard what you said, he stood stock still, trying to decide whether or not to go back into your room.  He clenched his fists and concentrated intensely to not break the fucking door down. All he needed was for you to call his name…

You stood in the middle of your room, naked except for the towel.  You closed your eyes and prayed for strength to not go running after him. You had to stay in control.  

But if you saw him turn your door handle, you would fuck him right there on the floor of your room.

After a few minutes, you both turned around and went about your business, Daveed to his room and you to the shower. You thought of Daveed in the shower and fell into bed still thinking of him. 

What did you want for your birthday, if not Daveed?

Daveed, alone in his bed, thought of all the feelings involved.  He knew you were fragile, but it seemed you were relaxing a bit, deciding to trust him if just a little.

He resolved to give a little bit of chase. You just needed to feel safe and accepted. 

You dreamt of each other so deeply that all that was left when you woke up was a wisp of a memory.

------

Daveed did not sleep long.  Even though it was after 4 o’clock when he went to sleep, he was up by 10, hard on raging under the sheets.  

He’d be damned if he jerked off, but he remembered your voice through the door of the room last night, and he had to strip the sheets away, as he was making a mess at the thought of you.  

He decided to go for a run on the beach. He pulled on some basketball shorts and decided to go shirtless, as the temperature outside was already 80 degrees.

Daveed ran with his music blasting in his ears.  He played out song lyrics and lined up preparation for upcoming roles.  Before he knew it, he was three miles down the beach from the house.

He turned around as the tropical heat and the sun was getting to be a bit much. He went back in and went to his room to shower and put some clothes on. You didn’t know the sight you were missing.

When you woke up at Noon, you pulled on Mark's t-shirt and basketball shorts and made your way to the kitchen which had floor to ceiling windows and glass doors facing the ocean. It was breathtaking. The doors were open and the ocean breeze felt amazing.

"Good morning, Sunshine!" 

You turned to see Daveed at the stove, greeting you and smiling. 

He was wearing an orange Oakland tank top and some pajama pants slung low on his hips. You smiled at his hair, which was tied up in two curly puffs at the front, with the back down in his wild curls.  

Even though it was an odd hairstyle for a grown man, you knew the curl life. And it did not take away from his masculinity.  

Not. At. All.

Besides, his curly puffs gave you a place to focus rather than on his well-muscled arms.  

Daveed’s hair reminded of when your mom did your hair only to have Dell try to pull your pony tails out as soon as she dismissed you from the kitchen chair. 

Ya’ll would get into so much trouble for fighting yet again. The thought gave you a warm feeling at the memory as you smiled wider and patted your own pineappled hair. 

‘Damn, her smile is a killer,’ Daveed thought as he watched you look around the kitchen for other signs of life. Now he was glad that he couldn’t sleep, and that he decided to be productive.  

He would have the chance to talk to you. As friends. Yeah.  He nodded to himself, trying to emphasize that last thought.  Friends.

Fuck.  He was in serious trouble.

Noticing that you and he were the only two humans in the kitchen and sniffing the air for the delicious smell that was wafting over from the stove, you finally greeted Daveed.

"Good morning, D.  Looks like everyone else is still knocked the fuck out.” 

Your other four friends were nowhere to be found.

You laughed, yawned and stretched.  Daveed turned back to the stove, cursing to himself. You were so damn fine.

“Calm the fuck down boy,” he whispered.

“What’s that?” 

You ventured over to see Diggs making French toast and bacon. Your stomach rumbled.

"I said sit down. Sounds like you’re hungry, haha. We gotta feed you. Grab some fruit over there and I'll serve you right up."

You grabbed something and sat down at the bar facing the windows. When Diggs turned to offer you some fresh oj, you didn't notice him watching you eat your banana. 

Your lips were a problem for him. When you looked away from the ocean, Daveed turned back to the stove and looked over his shoulder to smile at you.

His smile made you feel some kind of way.

"Why do they call you ‘Smiley?’" 

Daveed laughed, a sound that was quite nice.

“Because I started out as a clown. A professional clown.” 

You tilted your head, convinced that he was fucking with you. But maybe, he and Rafa always talked about the random shit they did to make money before they made it.

When he winked and turned back to the stove to the food, you just shook your head and ate the rest of your banana, positive that Daveed was fucking with you.

Meanwhile, Diggs was trying to stop himself from thinking about fucking with you. He did not need to watch you eat a banana. He licked his lips as he thought of how your lips tasted.

You smiled at Diggs’ broad back. He seemed different this morning.

He turned to plate some food for you and smiled again, shaking his head.

“Most times it’s a nervous tick.”

You were confused. “What’s a nervous tick?”

“My smile. I'm actually a really shy person.  Most times my smile is a defense mechanism.”

You were not sure about all that. Daveed had to know how he affected people.

“I’m not sure I believe that. Man. You are famous for performing in front of hundreds of people a night.  You’re on tv, movies, for goodness sake! You do live rap shows with your shirt off. I ain’t boo boo the fool.”

Daveed’s laugh filled the kitchen.

“How many clipping. shows did you watch on YouTube?  Or did you only watch the ones where I'm shirtless?” 

His look was hungry, and surprised, like he couldn’t believe he’d said that out loud. Then he barrelled on.

“I am shy, but I get my energy from crowds. I'm an introverted extrovert. Ya feel me?"

You nodded, understanding. You noticed that he was fiddling with the spatula he had in his hand. Uncertain again. He really was awkward. It was sweet. And hot.

Diggs continued.

"When I perform, I'm probably under the influence."

Pause.

"Hold up. What?" 

You flashed back to Mark. You couldn’t be around this again. Daveed caught your panicked look.

"Oh, it’s not like that, haha."  

That laugh and that smile. It automatically put you at ease. 

"It just takes a little. Drink; like last night at Criag’s Adrenaline; when I used to run track. Now it's performing." 

Daveed watched you carefully, gauging whether or not to continue. Fuck it, he thought. He felt as comfortable with you as when he first met Rafa.

"You know what the best drug is?" 

You cocked your head to the side, intrigued despite yourself. That smile. It was angelic and so opposite of what came out of his mouth next.

"Fucking. You know? When it's that good good. Or even better, that feeling when you haven't smashed, but the sexual tension is everything?"

There was suddenly little air in the room. You had to open your mouth to get oxygen. Oh. You knew the feeling alright. You gulped down your orange juice and continued eating.

"Hard-dick dopamine delivers every time." 

He said it so casually. He was playing innocent, but he was going for it.

You choked on your bacon. Daveed came up beside you.

"Raise your arms above your head.”

You turned toward him, held your arms up and he helped you, his hands holding your hands up. You stopped coughing pretty quickly but you stared at each other with your small wrists in his large hands. Daveed shifted on his feet and cleared his throat.  

“You good?" His voice had to be a couple of octaves lower. 

You gaped for a second, mouth still open, then laughed and nodded, pulling your arms slightly to get him to release them.  Daveed let go, stepped back and laughed along.

"But yeah. Back to what we were talking about...It just takes a little high, and I'm a completely different person." 

You watched him as he crossed his chocolate arms. 

"So what's your drug? Your motivation?"

That was something you didn't want to think about too hard. You tried to avoid his eyes. You cleared your throat and took another drink.  

“You got any vodka for this orange juice?”

-------

“C’mon. I made you this gourmet breakfast and everything…” You could hear the smile in his voice even though you were looking down. You didn’t feel pressed, you just felt like telling D this would open up so many things to him.

"Well, I don't do hard drugs if that's what you mean. No pills, or coke. Don't need molly," you winked and filled your mouth with French toast. 

"Gosh. This food is amazing!"

Daveed could barely make out the words through the food in your mouth.  He shook his head.

"Thanks, but don’t play me Lindy. Is french toast your motivation?"

Diggs wasn't letting you off the hook. You thought about it.  He was being very cool, and you felt safe with him.  You plunged ahead.

"I think about how fragile life is. How it is not guaranteed from day to day. How it can be taken away in a moment." 

You tried to push the emotions down and took a deep breath.

"I lost my twin brother when we were 17 in a car accident. I think a lot about what he didn't get to do. And that motivates me to do better with my life."

Daveed just looked down at the counter, mortified that he had pushed you to share something so personal. Then he finally looked up at you.

"That's a good reason to be motivated. I'm sorry for your loss." He looked down at his plate again.  "Look, I didn't mean to press you...."

Telling Daveed about Dell just felt right, even though you really didn’t know him like that.

"Don't apologize.  You didn't know. And I'm glad I told you." 

Diggs looked up at her and smiled. You smiled back.

He got up and stood next to you to grab your plate. Daveed smelled like coconut. It was nice. You closed your eyes and sniffed him.

"You done?" He was laughing at you.

"What? Oh, yeah. Thanks."

"Where is the fooood?"

Craig padded in the kitchen, with a wide smile. 

"There you are." You grinned at your cousin.

"Goood morningggg peopleeeee! I smell the Diggs Special. Hey. You two fuck last night?”

Rafa came in already on one this morning. Unlike his best friend, his confidence seemed to seldom waver.

He ignored your shocked looks and Craig’s laughter and went to get some food.  He continued as if he just walked in and said, “Good morning.”

"Ay, D, you gonna go check out this venue in town with me?"

Daveed shook his head at his friend. But he was chilling.

"Sure, what up?"

"I figure we can turn up on stage tonight"

"Cool. Let me eat and chill a little bit before we go." He looked at his watch. "About two?"

"Dope."

Jasmine walked into the kitchen. 

“Lindy needs to go shopping. We should come with.  You down, Craig?”

“You know it. That reminds me, we gotta fix you up.  Start destroying Daveed’s pants, since Lindy won’t do it for real.”

“Y’all gonna get enough…” you were getting swole.

“Calm down Ms. Fussy pants. Let’s go.”

Craig grabbed some shears from the kitchen and went toward Lindy’s room.

When you got to your room, Craig gave you the business.

"You are so tiresome."

“What?”

“You just need to fuck the man. We are all tired of feeling this sexual tension. It’s bothersome.”

“Leave me alone, Craig.” You watched as he worked his magic on the jeans. “What if I don’t want t…”

“Lie.”

“What if I’m not read…”

“Fuck that.”

“What if he hurts me? What if I hurt him?”

Craig put the shears down and turned toward you.  

“Listen, stop over thinking and do what you feel. What you want. Turn up. It’s your birthday. Anybody can see that man is all about you.”

“I’m scared.”

“I know. But you deserve…” He didn’t say it. 

“You deserve. Now put these clothes on, bitch.”

----- 

You emerged from the room and no one paid any particular attention to you, no one but Daveed. 

His eyes swept from your feet, which were housed in some of Jasmine’s high heeled sandals, to your long, brown legs which were highly moisturized and seemed to go on and get better from your juicy calves to your generous, muscular thighs. 

Craig had cut and distressed some jeans that Daveed didn't particularly love to garments that he felt he could not live without. 

On you. 

Damn, Daveed gaped as he remembered that you probably didn’t have any underwear on. 

His eyes moved up to notice how his blue Oaklandish t-shirt was huge, but the way you had it tied up let it accentuate your waist, breasts and shoulders.

‘Good God,’ he thought. As his eyes moved up to yours, he saw that you noticed his reaction and were smiling at him. He smiled back. He wanted you to wear nothing but his destroyed and altered clothing for the rest of your life.

“OKAYYYYYYY, you look cute as hell.” Jasmine admired your outfit.  

“Thank you!”  Craig responded. 

“Yes, you did that!” Jas laughed.  “And the model ain’t half bad.” Jasmine got up, took your hand and had you twirl.

“Got DAMN!”  

Everyone turned and looked at Rafa as he yelled.  He put his hand over his mouth. “Oh, did I say that out loud?”

Daveed was so grateful that you did not have any of your own clothes. Your ass in those distressed shorts were everything. He gulped and you and Jasmine giggled.

“Be quiet!” 

Anthony shushed everybody and then gave you a double take. 

“Nice, Lindy,” but then he turned back to the tv. He was used to Jasmine’s glorious ass, so he was nonplussed. 

“Let’s just finish this episode before we go. It’s my favorite,” he said as Jasmine went back over to sit down with him.

Black Dynamite was on the tv while they were waiting. It was the alien episode. 

Ant and Jas were curled up in a big white overstuffed chair, Craig was on the other,while Daveed and Rafa were on the couch. You sat down in between them. 

You leaned your head on Rafa’s shoulder, looking at Daveed. Rafa put his arm around you, watching the show, as you put your legs up on Digg’s knees. 

You didn’t see Rafa wink at Daveed, who just smiled at you and turned toward the screen. After a couple of minutes, he put his hand on your shins, looking over to see if it was okay.  

Your chill smile indicated your assent.  He started lightly rubbing, looking down at your caramel skin. Your legs were so soft. 

Diggs peeked up at you relaxing and accepting his touch, and snuggling into Rafa’s embrace.  The way you were looking at him was everything, even if you were in Rafa’s arms. 

Rafa was his boy. And he knew what you wanted. As for Daveed and you, you two were watching each other and not the screen.

Daveed decided to move his hand up your leg, but a flash went off and he stopped. He hadn’t noticed that the show was over and that Craig was taking pictures. 

"This is so cute! Family love!" 

He was cheesing as he snapped a wide-angle selfie and some pics. Jasmine came and sat on your lap, the couch becoming a crazy twister game. 

Anthony came behind the couch and snuck in the pics with the crazy eyes flipped a double bird behind Rafa’s head. You were all being so silly.

"What is this, a orgy?” Rafa with the jokes. 

“Not that I’m saying there’s anything wrong with that.” That devilish smile. Everybody laughed. 

“Y’all are some beautiful people, but ain’t nobody got time for that. Let's go."

Anthony seemed hype.  He slapped his hands together and then rubbed them.

“Okay, we have a choice, since we are going into town we can drive….” he looked around at everyone.  “OR, we can go over in my new boat!”

Everyone sensed that there wasn’t really a choice, so they all said, “Boat!” and laughed.  

Anthony’s grin was wide as fuck.  Jasmine harshed the flow.

“The only thing is, it only has four seats…”  Everyone looked around and counted six people. Ant spoke up.  

“I’ll be piloting, so I will stand, but it takes about 20-30 minutes, soooooooo…..”

“Sooooooo, Lindy… would you mind sitting on D’s lap? We need to get creative.” 

Her eyes sparkled as she smirked. 

“Would that be okay with you Diggs?”

Rafa coughed “Setup” into his hand.

You looked at Jasmine and Anthony and Daveed, who was looking at you expectantly.  You were in agreement with Rafa, but you weren’t mad. It seemed that everyone was looking at you.

“Sure…” said Daveed whose eyes were fixed on you.  “Is that okay with you, Lindy?” 

You smiled and nodded your head.  “I’m cool with it.”   Daveed smiled wide, eyes crinkling with happiness.

Jasmine and Anthony led you all out onto the back deck, where you and Jas took off your heels, and down to the beach, a little ways away to the boat dock.  You and Daveed brought up the rear of the little ensemble.

You were watching the waves and the beautiful surroundings, trying not to focus on the awkwardness. 

Daveed was watching you.

“You good Lindy?” 

Daveed’s voice broke your reverie.

“Yeah.” 

You two stopped and looked at each other.  Your head was tilted back, looking into D’s eyes. He smiled down at you and you felt warm.  Must have been the sun.

“Heyyyy youuu guuuysss!”  

Daveed nodded his head toward the boat. 

“Leggo.”

You smiled and followed him. Ant was at the helm, Jasmine and Rafa were at the front, and Craig was in the second row.  

Daveed stepped on the boat and turned around offering you his hand. You flashed back to that January night.

You swallowed, smiled and tried to board. And immediately fell when you misjudged the deck while stepping on the boat.

Daveed helped you up, chuckling, while Craig howled and Rafa shook his head. Jasmine just stared, open mouthed, said “That’s not funny,” then burst out laughing.

Anthony was busy getting the boat ready but had a grin on his face.

“Fuck all y’all!”

“No, not all of us, just D…”

“Shut the fuck up Craig.”  You gave him the gas face and then turned and smiled at Daveed.

Daveed was seated and spread his arms out so you could sit down.  Anthony started the engine, so you got settled in on his lap as carefully as you could.  

“You okay?” you asked him softly, turning on his lap and feeling the muscles in his thighs. And maybe something else. 

You tried to adjust your shorts to cover your core adequately, because like this, he would easily be able to ascertain your situation.

Daveed looked into your eyes and whispered, “I’m perfect.”

You agreed silently as you stared back into his big browns. 

You were thrown against Daveed’s chest as the boat gained speed. You were able to feel his abs through his t-shirt and your rear shifted and came into contact with his crotch. 

‘This is going to be a fun ride,’ you thought, smiling to yourself.

Daveed put his arms around you, one at your waist and one on your legs, to try and hold you steady.  The movement of the boat allowed him to feel you, just as he wanted.  

He turned his head and looked at the water, concentrating on keeping his hands in neutral locations.

Jas looked over at you.  “You okay?” she mouthed.

You smiled and nodded, giggling a little.

D turned his head back quickly to look at your face. You looked at him and winked. He smiled and unknowingly started stroking your leg.

You stopped laughing and all of your attention turned to his hand on your leg. You adjusted yourself in Daveed’s lap. You were getting a little moist and could feel his cock becoming hard. 

Your lips parted and you started breathing a little faster.

The feel of you on his lap was what was up. There was a definite heat from your core. Daveed happened to look down at his t- shirt on you and saw that your nipples were hard.  

All he wanted was for them to be in his mouth and to be enveloped in your heat.

Daveed turned his head to look at everyone else to see if they noticed you two, and his lips brushed your shoulder.  He heard your sharp intake of breath.

Geez, he felt like he could take you on the boat in front of everyone. By the way your body was reacting, he thought that you would let him.  

He finally noticed he was stroking your leg and stopped himself.  He sat up straighter and tried to get control.

You closed your eyes and moaned a little when Daveed pulled away.  All you wanted at that moment was him inside you. When you opened your eyes, Daveed was looking at you.

“You sure you’re comfortable? I could sit on the boat deck if you want.”

“No!” you said a little too loudly.  Craig smirked at you.

You blushed, then relaxed again in D’s arms. How could a moment be so awkward, yet so perfect?.  

After about 20 minutes, the view of the pretty little town of Isabela became clear.  It looked like a neat spot to spend the day, but you were sad that the boat ride was over.

As the boat came to a stop and tied off at the dock, you and Daveed let everyone get off before them, then D climbed out, turned around and held out his hand for you.  

You took it and stepped out onto the dock. You didn’t let go and Daveed didn’t either. No one said anything, just exchanged glances as you and Daveed concentrated on being casual with it.  

Truth be told, each of your hearts were pounding in your chest.  

This is another world. You could be free and do what you wanted to do.  And what you wanted to do was to hold Daveed’s hand.

Daveed’s chest was puffed out, proud that you decided to show affection. In front of the crew. 

This was a big step but he tried not to make it a big deal.  

You strolled together and admired the architecture, holding his hand until you walked to the shopping center on Barbosa Street.

They were going to check out a venue to do a show later in the weekend. Daveed didn’t want to let you go.

Rafa and Ant just walked on and let Daveed handle his business. 

“Go to work.” 

You smiling at him was everything, as Daveed played with your hand, moving it up to lace his fingers in yours and press your palm upright.

Jas and Craig went into the store.

“It’s not work. Having fun creating with friends…”  

Daveed really wanted to create fun with you. He felt like he should kiss you goodbye, but he didn’t want to push it.

“Bye Daveed.  See you in a few.” 

You laughed, cause it was like he was going off to war. This was too much.

“Bye Linden…” 

He finally let your hand go and then backed up the street in the direction that his bros went, not wanting to let you out of his sight. 

When you disappeared into the store, he turned and ran to catch up.

------

Rafa and Anthony were talking to the club owner in Spanish, Daveed following along, but not very well.  He thought they were talking about lighting and sound, but couldn’t get the entire conversation.

“Tienes tu propio gaffer o tenemos que hacer nuestra propia iluminación?”

“Nosotros tenemos un capataz, pero él cobra una tarifa separada.”

Daveed zoned out and planned how he was going to get closer to you.

Rafa turned to him and said something, and Daveed nodded. 

“Oh, absolutely.”

 He had not one clue what was happening in this club right now.  His mind was on you.  Rafa and Ant looked at each other.

“So, when they bring up the pigs in tutus, we cut one open and smear the blood all over you…” 

Anthony wanted to see if Daveed was paying attention.

Daveed smiled. “Sounds dope.”

Rafa and Ant shook their heads at him.

“Listen dude, your head is not in the game right now. You need to get right.”

They didn't have to tell him twice. 

------

You were going to town.  Craig and Jasmine had abandoned you and were already down at Pinkheart and Loft.  You were not moving from H & M.

You didn’t mind being alone in the store, as you minored in shopping in undergrad. You were in the zone. And zoned out from what was happening with Daveed. You needed some headspace.

Your hands were full of clothes and your heart was feeling light as you headed toward the dressing room. 

You could barely see over your pile when the cute top you just recently grabbed off a clearance rack fell on the floor as you rushed ahead.  You walked past it before you realized, then went back to try and pick it up.

You jumped as soon as you turned around.

Daveed was standing there with your top in his hand.

"Drop something?"  That smile was everything.

You stared at him wide-eyed. 

‘Fuck. Me.’ Daveed thought. 

"Here, let me take your pile, I'll help you to the register."

You smiled at him again. He'd do anything to see that smile forever.

"Oh, ok. Thanks." 

You handed over the clothes to reveal a handful of sandals underneath which you kept. Daveed slowed himself to appreciate you fully.

“I really like that shirt on you.” Daveed bit his lip. “And those shorts..”

You saw him checking you out and you watched him, your eyes fixed on his lips. 

You recalled the talk about what mouths could do from months ago but were thinking about his succulent lips. And you couldn’t stop.

You needed to remain in control.

"I'm not going to the register, I'm going to try these on.  You can drop them at the fitting room." 

Daveed looked around to tear his eyes away from you.  He caught you checking him out when he swung his eyes back around.  His stomach flipped a little.  

He smiled.

"Well."

You were at the fitting room, the attendant eyeing Daveed as he gave you a number and pointed you to a stall.  

You took the 10 garments you were allowed and started to go into to your fitting room, looking back at him over your shoulder. You disappeared into the room.

Daveed just stood there.

He made a decision.

You stood there for a minute, shook, before you thought you had yourself together. You were about to take off his shirt when Daveed opened the door at came in.

The look on your face was everything.  The wide eyes, that mouth in an "O." So damn fuckable.

"The guy out there said I could bring you the rest of your clothes."

That was true, after Daveed paid him 20 dollars.

He got close to you, reached behind you and put the clothes on the hook.

You could smell him. He smelled like the coconut and his cologne, and your dreams.  You closed your eyes.

Daveed wanted your lips. He wanted to own them, to command them, to hear them command him.

You opened your eyes and he backed up.  He tried to contain himself despite your proximity.

“Look. Daveed. That night. The launch party. I was wasted. I usually don’t lose control like that… I don’t want you to think that’s really me.”

You were keyed up and stressed because you were losing control.  He could tell.

God, he wanted to put his hands on you. In a good way. You’d calm down then.

He knew you had baggage.  And that he should probably stay away.  But he didn't want to.  Hell, he had matching luggage. 

"Well, I think it is you. I have a theory that people are more their real selves when they are drunk or high. Inhibitions are gone. They get to act out like they want to. Do what they want to."

Daveed looked into your eyes.

"What do you want to do, Lindy?"

You wanted to do a lot of things.  To Daveed. In this fitting room. You almost gave it all up for him right there.

Then you got mad. At Daveed or your feelings, you didn’t know.

"That's just it, adults don't get to do what they want to do all the time. It's called adulting, you know. Responsibilities...?" 

You fired back at him.

He opened his mouth and spoke.  To himself as well as you.

"Chill."

He said it gently, not raising his voice at all, but the force behind it made you shut the fuck up. 

Your knees were weak and the small of your back was acting up again. Your body was reacting without your permission. You shivered.

Daveed could tell you were reacting to him physically.  But he wanted inside your mind, not just your body. He was going to give you some space. 

He backed toward the door of the fitting room. Leaning against it, his long body in jeans and t-shirt delectable.

“What do you want, Linden?” 

His voice was deeper, more commanding now. You swallowed. You were exhausted from fighting it. Maybe you could have a taste.

“I-I want a kiss. Just a kiss.”

Daveed felt triumphant.  He smiled and looked down at his shoes, then back up at you.

“Come get it.”  

He was going to let you make the first move.

You bit your lip through a smile.  You walked the five steps toward him in slow motion it seemed, as you raised up on your tiptoes to reach up and peck his lips, your hands behind your back.  

Your lips met his pillowy goodness and you leaned back to look into his eyes.  

Then, you put your hands on his shirt, tracing his abs all the way up and going back in for more, Daveed’s tongue prodding it’s way between your lips, and your tongue dancing with his.

You moaned as Daveed put his hand on your hips and then slid them up the sides of his shirt, skimming your breasts, and resting under your arms as you two went for it. 

He lifted you up and you wrapped your legs around his waist, as he backed you into the wall. 

He palmed your ass in the shorts, his long fingers reaching inside the distressed rips and squeezing your ass. He spread you apart and squeezed you closed, so that his fingers barely grazed your core and drove you crazy.  

When you reached up and pulled his hair, that’s when he stopped kissing you, leaned his head against your forehead and breathed, “Fuck, Lindy. You don’t know what you do to me.”

You just looked at him and craned your neck for another kiss which he couldn’t deny, but then he stopped and let you down.

“What do you want Daveed?”

Daveed put his hand on the wall above your head. You looked up at it and at him and he had to remember to breathe.

“Fuck it. Linden, I want you. You know that.” 

You raised your eyebrow and smiled up at him, then bit your lip, playful. Daveed’s throat became dry.

“And I think that I know that you want me too. But I know it’s hard.”

Your eyes swept down his torso to his pants, and damn, well…if it wasn’t hard right now.

He cleared his throat.  “It’s hard for YOU.”  You smiled wide. 

He rolled his eyes.

“You know what I mean. It’s hard for you to be vulnerable, but Linden, I won’t hurt you. I promise.”

The way he looked in your eyes. You couldn’t go there with him, but the physical was okay for now. You decided to indulge yourself.  It was almost your birthday.

“What if I want you... to hurt me?” 

The innocent look in your eyes masked the devilish intent in your words. Daveed, stomach flipped again and he screwed his eyes shut. He masked a whimper and opened his eyes again.

“Huh. Don’t play with me Linden.” The menacing tone of his voice was making you wet.

“But what if I want to play with you, Daveed?” 

You reached for his belt buckle; Daveed stopped you, grabbed your hand and put it above your head against the wall, his arms now caging you in. 

You raised your chin, meeting his glare with yours. His eyes were fucking you so rough right now. You had to open your mouth to breathe, your tongue darting out to wet your bottom lip.

Daveed was looking as if he was going to devour you..  That mouth. He wanted to take it, but he restrained himself.  He had to know.

“Tell me. What. You. Want.”

You held his stare, the air around you crackling with energy.

“I want you Daveed.”

His smile was wide. Then he bent down, grabbed your thighs in his hand, picked you up and carried you to the mirror and pressing you against it, running his hands back down your body to your ass, cupping and grabbing it to memorize how it felt.

“We are NOT about to do this in the fitting room at H & M.  But somebody is going to cum. Right now.”

You kissed him as he ran his hands under your shirt to your nipples, pinching and rolling them in between his fingers as he kissed you again.

You started whimpering in your throat as you let him make you wet. 

“God, Daveed.”  

You kissed him again, but he did not stop what he was doing to your breasts.

“What?”  Daveed asked when you came up for air. “You wet?’

“Fuck yes.”  

You moaned as you threw your head back and huffed.

Daveed pulled his shirt up off your waist and exposed your breasts.  

“So fucking beautiful.”  

His mouth watered at the sight. Daveed licked his lips and leaned toward those beauties.

“Can I?”  Daveed paused.

“Please!” You whispered.  

He leaned down. His mouth got so close that you could feel his hot breath. Then he paused again.

“Please what?”

At first you could not think of what he was talking about. Then you got it.

“Please. Sir.”  

Your eyes sparkled under your lashes as you looked down. His dick got even harder.

“Such a Good Girl for me Linden. Fuck.”  

Damn, he had the key to your pussy.

Your wetness was leaking down your thigh, now reaching the tips of Daveed’s fingers.

Daveed proceeded to alternate his attention to each breast. Delicately at first, he kissed your nipples, then suckled them gently, then harder, more insistently, until his mouth was pulling at them rhythmically and firmly, to the point of almost hurting you.

You were groaning pretty loudly and Daveed released a nipple from his tightly clamped lips with an almost painful pop.

“Suck this,” he said, and put his thumb in your mouth, pushing your head back into the mirror. 

While still suckling you, he then moved his other hand down your body to your crotch and stuck his hand into the jean shorts, his long fingers grazing your folds, feeling a small patch of hair and your oh so slick lower lips. 

He looked up at you and how you were enthusiastically sucking his thumb, fellating it like it could cum down your throat.  That sight and feeling, combined with how you felt at your core, was fucking him up.

“Damn, Lindy? All this. For me? You sure?”

You nodded vigorously, his thumb deep in your mouth as he kept you pressed to the mirror. He found your clit and started rubbing, while inserting a finger into you. 

You were so fucking tight, it was a stretch to fit two in, but you were humming with pleasure now, your eyes rolling back in your head.

You nodded again, and as he pried your mouth open, your sounds became louder before he put his mouth on yours and kissed you, muffling your moans as his thumb and fingers worked in concert to bring you close to the edge. 

You tried to reach for his belt buckle again and he moved out of the way.

“Unh unh, it’s not about me right now.” 

Daveed grunted. He spun you around and had you face the mirror, his hand in your mouth and your pants, and his cock pressed into your ass.

It was big and your eyes matched it. You two stared at each other.

“Look at us.  Don’t we look good together? This should be a thing.”  

You watched what he was doing to you and it did look hot as fuck.

He pressed deeper into you through your pants.  He could feel you quiver on his fingers. 

“You want it Lindy?”

Daveed could feel your clit harden and vibrate like a guitar string.

“Maybe later, but you could cum… not now…” 

You whimpered around his thumb, but he sped up.  

“Not now…”

You were almost crying now. Daveed was smiling, his teeth bared against the shell of your ear, whispering his commands to you.

“NNNNot now….” 

Your legs were shaking from holding it.

“Good girl. Now cum.”  

Daveed spoke into your ear and you exploded from the inside out. It had been months since anyone else made you cum.

He reached down and grabbed you under your knees and sat down with you on the fitting room bench. You were draped around him like a vine, exhausted.

D held you for a few, taking care of you and waiting for his hard on to go down. You clung to him, eyes closed, trying not to panic. This was good. You wanted this.  And you told him so.

“Me too, Lindy.”  

He helped you stand and stood himself, standing behind you and watching you straighten yourself out in the mirror.  He pulled you back against him, wrapping his arms around your front and putting his chin next to your forehead.

“I meant what I said, Linden.  We look good together.  Let this be a thing.”  

You just smiled at him as you thought about the weekend to come.

-------

Read the Next Chapter

Let me know if you like it!

Tagging: @sillyteecup  @ohsoverykeri  @theselilwonders @theatrenerd86 @sebastianabucknettastan @imatyoursurrvicesurr @riiyy @ivycomet @lonelydance @jbrizzywrites @curtainremote @biafbunny @summerofsnowflakes @biafbunny @id-do-it-for-free-babe 

Also, let me know if you want to be tagged!

[liliesoftherain]

YouTube Challenge!

Request: Ok so I’ve been watching a lot of youtube couples (not the cringey ones lol) and I reallyyy wanted a head canon for maybe bakugou, shoto, and kiri with a s/o who is a youtuber, and they shoot a couple video like those “my boyfriend rates my outfits” or “chapstick challenge” videos. Could the prompts (42)“(58)(18) Also boys to be pro heroes already...if that’s ok. 

A/N: I hope you enjoy this hun, @pletopliito​ and also as each one is written it gets shorter and shorter lol IM SO SORRY

Prompts: 18. “Have you lost your damn mind?” 43. “Why don’t you kiss me already?” 58. “Are you flirting with me?”

Pairing: Katsuki Bakugou x Reader, Eijiro Kirishima x Reader, Shoto Todoroki x Reader

Katsuki Bakugou!:

“Hey guys, QueenExplosion here! And I have a surprise! Drumroll… It’s King Explosion, as a guest!”

You excitedly pulled your boyfriend into the chair next to you, laughing as he grumbled about the name.

“Right, right! Sorry Mr. Pro Hero, I meant Ground Zero is joining me today!”

“Against my will, might I add.” 

You smacked his arm without looking for the snide comment,

But knowing your boyfriend,

This video was bound to be full of them

“Alright, so today I look a little bare don’t I? That’s because this hunk is going to be doing my makeup.”

“Get ready to look like shit.”

“ANYWAAAAYS, let’s just jump right in, yeah? So I have all my makeup set out on the desk here, I’m not telling him what does what-”

“Like I need to know, this shit isn’t rocket science.”

“And it’s his job to make my look as fine as I always do.”

You watched as Katsuki faced you, grabbing a random brush and your highlighter.

“This is like the base coat for your foundation crap, right.”

He huffed to himself as you stifled a laughter, side eyeing the camera

He brushed it all over your face before picking up your stick foundation,

“Now this just kinda goes.. Fucking everywhere.”

He narrowed his eyes in concentration and you thought he was adorable,

“What are you doing Katsu?”

“You put dots all over your face. So that, stupid.”

He grabbed the beauty blender and you were shocked to try to see him dab it all over your face

He lightly grabbed your neck to maneuver your position,

Making it easier to blend in the makeup

“Do you think I need this much makeup?”

“No.”

“Awhhh-”

“You need a fucking crap ton.”

You smacked his arm again at the rude comment,

But you knew he was kidding with the way he was smirking

“Now that your face is done or whatever the hell, guess it’s the eyes.”

He picked up one of your newer palets and your heart skipped a beat,

“Oh man I just got this… Don’t mess it up please.”

“Yea, yea shut up.”

“I’m serious Katsuki-”

“Shitty woman I won’t mess it up. Now quit talking so I can make your eyes fucking pretty.”

“Haha okayy~”

He grabbed a small brush and opened your eyeshadow pallet,

Staring intently at the colors

“What are you glaring so hard for? Just pick one, I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

“You use these two the most. Let’s mix them.”

“Wait, what-”

You watched with wide eyes as he dipped the brush into one color,

Roughly grabbing the powder onto the brush before-

“Have you lost your damn mind, KATSUKI!”

“EH!? WHAT!”

You watched as he selected another color,

Lighter than the first,

Blending them together on the pallet instead of on your eye

LIKE HOW A REGULAR HUMAN BEING DID IT

“YOU CAN’T JUST MIX THEM THERE, YOU RUIN THE COLOR!”

“HA? YOU BLEND SHIT ALL THE TIME!?”

“ON MY EYES DUMBASS!”

“So.. Like this?”

He brought the brush up to your cheek and smeared the makeup all over

“Whoops. Missed.”

“Katsukii!”

Laughing and whining you tried to push him away but he kept sneaking makeup all over your face,

Grabbing your hands and holding them so you couldn’t stop his onslaught

It was all fun and games till you heard a crash,

Looking down you saw your pallet on the ground,

Face down

“... Bakugou Katsuki…”

At the tone of your voice he stopped,

Looking down to where he saw you gaze on your fallen makeup.

“Oh fuck.”

Let’s just say that video ended with a bunch of cut scenes until you said goodbye,

Smiling face full of misused makeup and Katsuki with a smug look on his face,

Even if he did have matching makeup stains where you wiped your cheek against his.

“Fellas, if you’re asked to try this, just don’t-”

“Ignore him!! Thanks for the stopping by and watching the explosion duo! See you guys soon! ”

Eijiro Kirishima!:

“Hi beautiful people, and welcome back to my channel! It’s your host, RockkStarr here with my own, rock star- Red Riot! And today we are going to be doing the Chubby Bunny challenge!”

“Yosh!! I’m hyped up to eat some delicious sweets, oh, and the marshmallows too.”

Winking at the camera Eijiro pulled you in close,

You laughed and tried to squirm away as he left playful bites along your shoulder

“Oh stop! If you guys are unfamiliar with the challenge, it’s a winner-loser game-”

“That I’ll definitely win.”

“That you win by seeing how many marshmallows you can fit in your mouth while still being able to say, ‘chubby bunny’!”

“Oh then I’ll definitely lose, you see these cheeks? Made for this.” 

“Owiee!”

Eijiro laughed as you swatted his hand away while he pinched your cute cheek.

“Let’s get onto the marshmallows!”

“YOSH!”

The first few times didn’t go so well since he kept eating them,

“Ei babe you gotta keep it in your mouth!”

“That’s what she-”

After a few more failed attempts you were both up to five, and you both could still talk pretty clearly,

But Kirishima was not making this easy for you,

“What was that??”

“You heard me!!” 

You covered your mouth as you tried to hold back laughter,

Making it even harder to do so as you saw your boyfriend's cheeks puffed out so wide,

With a pursed smile to make him look funnier

“Say it again!”

“CHUBBY BUNNY!!”

After another 4 more you were getting to the limit,

Eijirou was tearing up in laughter about how cute you looked with puffed cheeks,

And every time you opened your mouth to talk they would almost fall out,

“Why don’t you just kiss me already?”

He teased with an almost clear voice,

You rolled your eyes at his smugness but did it anyways,

As soon as your lips touched you couldn’t hold back the giggles,

Spitting out wet marshmallows all over your boyfriend you began dying of laughter,

His shocked and disgusted face made you laugh even harder as his own came out of his mouth

“THAT WAS SO GROSS BABE!”

“AHHHH I’M SORRY!”

You both ended the video,

Your chin slick with drool and Eijiro covered in soggy marshmallows,

But you were both smiling and laughing nonetheless

“Thanks for tuning in! See you beauties next time, RockkStarr-”

“And Red Riot!”

“OUT!” 

Shoto Todoroki!:

“Hello friends, it’s me, IceeBaby! Don’t be alarmed, I know it may be hard to recognize me behind all this Gucci-”

“That’s a store brand tee-shirt, don’t lie.”

“Aaaaaand I’m here with my ice ice baby, Shoto! Thanksforruiningtheintro.”

“Anything for you, love.”

“Thanks babe..  today we are going to have a fashion show of sorts. I'll be trying on my closet for you all to see, and he is taking time out of his busy day to rate them for me!”

“She looks good in anything, so you’re going to get 10/10s everytime.”

“Oh my gosh. Are you flirting with me?”

“I most definitely am.”

“You do know I am dating a top pro hero right?”

“What is he going to do?” 

You giggle as Shoto pulls you onto his lap from, squeezing you tight while he did.

“He can try all he wants but he can't have you back.”

“You’re such a dork-Oh no!! You’ll wrinkle my clothes, let me go!”

“Wrinkled or not this outfit is still a 10 for me.”

You wiggled out of his hold, messing his hair up as you stood.

You tried on a few different outfits, explaining where you got them and why you liked them so much.

“Oh and this shirt-”

“Is my favorite actually.”

“Ohh?? Why is that?”

“This is the shirt you were wearing when we went on our first date.”

Your jaw dropped and Shoto swears there were hearts in your eyes,

“Shoto.. You remember that?”

“Why wouldn’t I? It was one of the best days of my life, you were wearing that shirt and that one pair of jeans that makes your ass look fat-”

“aahhhHHHHHHH! you know about my butt enhancing jeans!?”

“Well, then I didn’t but I know which ones they are now.”

“Kya, you’re so embarrassing~!”

“You were the one wearing them, trying to impress me.”

“Well of course! I was on a date with an up and coming hero, who has tons of pretty heroes who could snatch you from me.”

You pouted looking away from him,

He once again pulled you onto his lap,

“No one is more beautiful than you. I want no one else.”

You looked over to the camera with a smug smile,

“Hear that? Sorry thirsty guys and gals, this man is all mine!”

“Thirsty??”

“Uh yeah, you know how many people thirst over you?”

“Do you know how many thirst over you?”

“Not as many as you, sweetie pie.”

“Whatever you say love, in that case,”

Shoto glared at the camera, shielding you with his body,

“You thirsty people cannot have her either.”

“KYAAA SHOTO-KUN HOW EMBARRASSING!!~~”

You look up at the camera the best you could, a big smile on your face,

“That’s it for today’s video! Go find other people to thirst over!! But I really hoped you enjoyed this! Comment down below if you’d like more content like this! Thanks a bunchies friends! Icy Hot 1 and 2 reporting for outro! Bye!”

[hasliaran]

Undertale is owned by Toby Fox

Sooner or Later You’re Gonna be Mine is written by Staringback.

TimeHealsTale - Still a WIP by me.

Meet my undertale OC from TimeHealsTale which is an AU living rent free in my head. They are a canon MC that replaces the real Sans (age 5) after he got dumped into a tub of Void by Gaster to be forgotten.

Name: Comic Sans Du Font (Comic/Komi)

Age: 22 (5 years younger than canon Sans and 8 years older than Paps)

Job: Monster Healer that does House-calls. (Not a Judge; Sans disappeared because he was a Judge)

Profile in Game: Toriel’s Contact, The Smuggler, Summon Healer (after befriending; limited to 5 calls (diff. work phone no.); rapid calls will assume it’s a prank and not be picked up for a certain period of time.)

This is not her usual outfit but I just really wanted to post it.

In my head, the scene goes …

- she fell into the void trying to pull out a deformed still 5 years old Sans when she was going through her father’s stuff in his lab dungeon. (Occurred after the barrier broke)

- Sans was in a mega huge test tube floating in pitch black Void essence (frozen in stasis as no time passes through Void), so she couldn’t see anything or knew he was inside. Only after she accidentally tipped it over, smashing it to pieces, when trying to push it out of the lab that she realised there was an effing toddler inside it.

“Dad, seriously?” Comic got fed up already with the mess her father left behind after he got scattered.

- Cue her trying to grab the kid out of the muck only to fall in and be dropped down into another universe with the little one.

(Yes, this is the multiverse travel scene excuse and I love it)

Back then, Sooner or later your gonna be mine just uploaded a new comic chapter on YouTube. Hence, my brain went overdrive and said it’s a free real estate. So, I imagined the duo getting found by the skeleton brothers before the story started from rumours of them pillaging around trash sites, random food thefts and small skeletons offering up to do odd jobs.

Other skeletons than them, huh, curious.

Them skeletons in that story was already huge as heck though, now imagine a five a year old and a roughly five foot skeleton with a slight build running around what was essentially a mob era in the 1920’s.

The first thing that would go through their thick skulls was KIDS, THEY ARE KIDS, WHO HERE F***ED AND DIDN’T USE PROTECTION ?!

So much shenanigans from just trying to chase them down. ^_^

In the end, Komi and Void/V (little Sans; Komi’s not that creative at naming) were lured in by food, an offer for a roof over their heads and warm baths. Yep, tragic.

Little sans doesn’t look like a sans anymore here but a mere smooth skull shell with two big eye sockets and nothing else. I meant that literally. No lips or teeth as those were melted away and a pitch black body with stumps for legs. (look at Hollow Knight; Ghost but without the horns and has smoothen out round cheeks at least. I love that game.)

The last thing he remembered was that his aunt (step sister actually but he knows her as auntie) giving birth in the Underground Hospital and his uncle (Gaster) pushing him into a tub of black liquid, watching him drown.

And now he can’t talk since his lips is sealed shut.

Moreover, someone with his name who looks like a lot like his auntie and a bit like his uncle was dragging him around somewhere. It’s hella weird and confusing and he can’t cry properly. (Yes, HK reference here)

Yes, there is a story here for the duo that will coincide with SoLY’reGBM. Mostly, with Komi claiming Bara Sans courting skills were lame as hell no wonder Frisk ran screaming. This happen only at the time they were all comfortable enough to diss each other. Still, she and V were treated like sassy annoying younger siblings.

One’s assumed to be a teenager another a preschooler. So both were admitted to schools by force and with threats for Komi by Gaster since he didn’t want them in the house 24/7. Also to just enjoy the fact they have money now to send someone in their place to experience school. Papyrus here loves it that someone gets to experience and tell him all about while also not being the youngest in the family anymore.

Komi, in hindsight was 50/50 about it. Hating the idea at first before going, huh, maybe it’s not so bad… Hence the outfit up there. ^

She only has been to pre-school when her mother was alive and nothing else since, Gaster, her father, deeming it useless and only had been homeschooled by him. As much as you could call being locked in a room and told to read/answer these sheets of questions or not she’s never allowed to feed Papyrus as homeschooling activities. It happened in a period of when she was 10 - 14, so Paps would be 2 - 6. Damn well, she learned to memorise and spit everything out like a photocopier.

Seeing the Gaster in this universe sorta freaks her out. Making her wait to be ordered and when she doesn’t gets the order or the orders were just a pat on the skull and be told to behave, nothing else. She will proceed to look at him funny only to realise that oh, this is not dad. The three brothers can see that gal there has been through some shit and it’s not the fun kind. This also makes them question whether they should let them go back to wherever they came from, and that’s a whole other bag of fish to fry.

Komi knows they are a mob family, accepts it because hey her dad had a dungeon where he cuts up humans and eats SOULs for breakfast so why not this?

Only to find out they are pretty nice for a family and was this what a family suppose to be like? She liked it.

Komi with V/Void -, I will protect you my new baby brother that I have adopted at first sight with my body and SOUL. Which she does, she was raised with her Papyrus who was always aimed at gunpoint by her father. Basically, a rinse and repeat cycle situation in her eyes. Only to find out that no, nobody was out to get V!

She felt so gosh darn free in this universe but felt as though she was missing something all the time.

Yep, her found family from back home. So, definitely gotta get out of here somehow.

While also going to high school and befriending your adopted uncles’s enemy’s niece. Fuku Fire. Definitely not telling them what she did. They are gonna get so pissed.

Fuku - I have befriended the cool kid that’s not afraid to talk back against adults and was already a pro in home economics, who is also a skeleton Monster, meaning from a rival family. My parents and Uncle *pedo* Grillby must never know.

Comic will also be going through the motions of life here while figuring out how V’s powers work to send them back home and be getting a supply of Uncle’s favourite mustard since he’s been bitching about it every day by now.

He and Gaster will most definitely never know.

Nah, they know. Comic is a freaking blabber mouth that tells everything to this version of Papyrus just like she does in her own universe. Confirmed, she’ll be outed within 3 days by Paps and a fight about who she befriends was not their business.-at Gaster - who then sees it as an opportunity. Which leaves her storming out yelling they are all the same. Gaster and her Gaster.

Shit goes down that day, and everything went A-okay. Komi would make attempts to not overlap her father’s image over this guy because really, this Gaster is the farthest thing to her dad that’s a centuries old psychopath craving the secrets of the multiverse who would instead have not let her run out the house unscathed for yelling nor talked through things with her when she was brought back.

Darn guy was pretty nice.

Sans and Papyrus of this universe : who are you and what have you done to our brother?

G: What was that?

S&P: Nothing. S: (mutters under his breath) bias piece of sh*t

Then there’s that scene where they now got a new area to govern. Komi and V finds it weird but okay. *shrugs*. It felt like they were going to govern their territory or something. Sounds like basic Royal Guards one-o-one shtick her middle bro’s and friends’ kinda work. Seems simple enough.

It was not simple. I repeat, it was not simple.

G: No, we do not have to patrol the area.

G: No, we do not do shifts to monitor criminal activities.

G: It’s just an area that we will get a claim to.

G: But I need the humans here to be comfortable with Monsters, so I am going to let loose Papyrus on them. Since, we also have you two as well. Feel free to interact with the Humans. Tell me if anyone gives you three any trouble, Sans and I will personally deal with it.

S: wut? Yes? Yep, whatever he says goes. Better listen to your elders, brats.

P: Really, Sans?

C: So-, you want us to help around with the people in the area? Like charity work? Give free food and all that?

G: (how did she jumped to that? but otherwise, she’s not wrong.) … Yes-, that. Feel free to use your green magic on them as well if you have to but only when necessary. I don’t want you to suddenly disappear because your own loose lips.

C: Alright. (Does an excited fist pump) This is gonna be awesome~! …. Heyyy, did you just-

P: And I will be sure to guard them. (No arguing here from the other brothers)

V: (pouts and hand signed) N-O-T—B-A-B-Y

P: (could only stare at this being that barely reaches his kneecaps) Of course, little one.

All I know is, all of them are sassy sarcastic shits and there’s way more to be continued here.

So byeeee~

[connorandersons-blog]

Kinktober Day 1: Biting, Convin

Oh gosh, ok so I actually tried to do kinktober, I still have a few days to write and whatnot but I think I got most of them done.

Anyway, this is a Connor/Gavin fic, and a vampires and whatnot are real fic too.

Hope you enjoy!

---------------------------

Connor swayed slightly and groaned to himself. This was the fifth week he was low on blood. Blood that kept him alive and able to pass as human. He had gotten away with licking things at crime scenes when no one was watching, but that wasn't nearly enough for him. 

He had also gotten away with drinking some of the blood from dead bodies but he hated the taste. It was like drinking tea that had been left out overnight-not good. 

Thankfully he kept his all of this a secret from everyone, not even his work partner-Hank-knew. Of course, there were others like him, but The Society was a perfectly kept secret. Absolutely no one outside knew and if they did then they'd have one of the fae help change the memory. Not that that happened too often thankfully. 

Yet it was hard to tell who was different and who was human. There were the signs of course, but The Society had gotten incredibly efficient at hiding all unique aspects. Faes often had pointer ears and oddly colored eyes. Very few had wings after so long, but they all had the markings on their backs. 

Wolves or weres typically had more hair on them and sharper nails, but both of those could easily be hidden with modern technology. 

Warlocks, wizards, and witches were all typically tall, their skin often sparkled with their magic, but because of their magic, they could easily disguise themselves. 

Then there were the vamps, like Connor. His fangs were retractable so he didn't have to worry about those normally anyway. His eyes are typically black but colored contacts worked wonders, not to mention his extra strength and speed. Though, the strength and speed relied on his blood intake, as did his ability to be in the sun. The whole mirror thing was a complete hoax, though, everyone could see themselves. 

But The Society could only see their true selves in the mirror while everyone else saw how they were disguised. It made checking to see if they were probably hidden a bitch. 

Connor reached out and leaned against the wall, his nose sniffing the air. It came back with so much life, so much blood that it had him whining softly. He really needed to get some blood soon. He already felt weak as a normal human and his skin itched whenever the sun touched it. 

He couldn't wait too long either, if he did then he'd go on an accidental rampage and drink as much blood as he could without caring if the human lived. That or he'd die, which neither option was preferable in all honesty. 

"Son, you ok? You're looking a little pale, did you eat this morning?" Hank asked, reaching out to make sure Connor didn't fall over. 

He waved him off and stood back up, stretching slightly. He was getting far too old for this, not that anyone knew his actual age. "I'm fine, might be coming down with something." 

Hank hummed and patted him on the shoulder. "You barely get sick, so if you need time off I'm sure Fowler won't mind." Wasn't that the truth. As long as he had good clean blood he'd never get sick, not in the human sense of things. 

"Yeah, maybe. Let's focus on the scene though, gotta solve this first." This job was something he loved but it also gave him access to being able to help The Society and willing records of unnatural things, like Connor not aging, if need be. 

Hank squinted at him before nodding, "alright, so what do we know?" 

Connor went over the evidence, trying to hide the fact that all of his senses were heightened, that he was guesstimating for the most part. He'd gotten a few things a bit too right before when he had been less careless that had raised eyebrows. Now he knew better, now he purposely made small mistakes even if it drove him batty. 

Hank nodded along as Connor led them from room to room, giving a few suggestions as to what could have happened. But something about the scene was nagging at him. Fuck he really needed blood if his eyesight was this bad. 

They ended up going back to the station and Connor could help the small groan at it being so bright. Ok, so some things were accurate about vampires, but he hated that the whole light sensitivity was one. 

You know he used to be a normal human back say a few hundred years ago. Then he had to go and almost died, but a vampire (who he hadn't known was a vamp, obviously) had saved him. He had expected to live a normal, short life, blissfully unaware of The Society. Now his life was practically consumed by it. 

"Fucking hell, you look like shit!" 

Connor let out a low sigh, feeling his gums ache at the need to bring at his fangs. "Thank you, Gavin, I hadn't noticed." He brought a hand up and poked at his teeth, wincing slightly at the soreness. If he wasn't careful they could come out if he got too worked up, whether that be from anger or something else. 

"God, get a snack or something." Gavin crossed his arms but didn't seem interested in moving away from Connor's desk. Did this man have nothing better to do? God, and he smelled like heaven, that neck so perfect. He could just reach out, tilt his head to the side, and sink his teeth in. He'd make it feel good too, part of the whole biting thing. Didn't want the person to struggle while being bit so vamps had a way to calm, or… other methods. 

"I'd love to." He muttered under his breath, low enough that no one would be able to hear. No human, that is. "I am trying to get to work, so if you'd excuse me." 

Gavin squinted and huffed. "I can stand wherever the hell I want. You too good to talk to anyone now? Fuck you're a bitch." 

"And you're a dick, can we get this over with?" If Gavin stood there any longer he didn't know if he'd be able to help himself. There was just something about the way Gavin's blood smelled, so fresh and clean. He had a theory that it was because of the man's health and how well he took care of himself, his heart was in perfect condition. 

Gavin's eyes widened and he sputtered for a second before stomping away. Connor rubbed at his forehead and sent Hank a dirty look when the man started to chuckle. 

They worked comfortably for the rest of the day, going over the case and suspects as they waited for forensics to come back with anything. Connor ended up sending Hank home while he stayed behind. This wasn't uncommon, Connor only needed an hour of sleep a day and he often got that from taking a quick nap sometime before the day truly started. 

It was close to three am when he pushed away from his desk, rubbing his face. He made his way over to the bathroom and looked at his reflection. God, he really did look like shit. 

His hair was a curly mess, him having tugged it enough to come out of the styling he did every morning. The bags under his eyes were heavy and he was definitely far paler. He splashed some water on his face, knowing that wouldn't actually do anything, but it still felt nice. 

The door swung open again and Connor jumped, spinning around quickly. Gavin Reed walked in and scowled at Connor for a second before his face dropped, he looked as tired as Connor felt. 

"Hey, dipshit, long night huh." It wasn't the nicest thing but far more polite than Gavin often was. He walked over and splashed water on his face as well, giving it a few pats. 

"Yes, I seem to be low in energy." Maybe he could find some animal blood, but it always tasted dirty too, being dead for so long. He'd never actually killed any animals or humans for their blood and he wasn't going to start now. 

Gavin nodded and turned his back to the sink, leaning against the counter. His head fell back and Connor felt his stomach drop. Even if he wasn't a vamp he'd probably have the same reaction, it wasn't hard to admit that Gavin was attractive. That Connor was attracted to Gavin of all people. 

Connor stared at the neck, wanting to reach out and feel Gavin's pulse under his fingers. It would be so strong and welcoming, then he'd… no, fuck. He needed to stop thinking about that and stop staring at his god-damned neck like a creep.  

Gavin made a low whine and rolled his shoulders, eyes slipping closed. "Fuck, I need something to wake me up, you know? Coffee just isn't doing it." 

If he didn't know better Gavin sounded like he'd be part of The Society, but his blood smelled too human for that. One of the perks of being a vamp was smelling blood and being able to tell a lot from it. Not that it helped much if one from The Society had powerful enough magic on them. 

"Yes, I agree. Perhaps I can help in some way?" He wasn't sure how but he'd give it a go, especially if it got him closer to Gavin in any way.

Gavin cracked an eye open and a smirk slowly formed on his lips. He pushed away from the counter and moved over to Connor, getting into his personal space. "Oh really? Are you sure you want to help?" Gavin reached out and ran a hand up Connor's chest. 

Oh shit. He had not expected this at all, but he fucking loved it. "I-uh, yes. God yes." He let himself finally touch, his hands going down to Gavin's hips first. 

"Good, you better tell me to back down if you get uncomfortable though," was Gavin's only earning before he leaned up and brushed their lips together. Connor pushed forward, moving a hand up to hold Gavin by the back of his neck, eagerly kissing back. 

Tentatively, he sneaked his tongue out to feel the full, slightly chapped lips that he’d wanted to lick since the moment he’d laid eyes on them. Gavin released a small gasp and Connor used that opportunity to lick more boldly. He bit at Gavin's bottom lip gently, pulling at it. Gavin hummed and so Connor did it again before kissing him deeply. 

Their hands pushed and pulled at each other, finding soft warm skin. Gavin's hands went up and under Connor's shirt, gently scratching at his back.

Connor pulled back and trailed hot kisses down Gavin's jaw to his neck, loving each little sound it got out of Gavin. Fuck he's wanted this for so long, craved the feeling of Gavin under his lips.

Connor bit and sucked languidly at the skin above Gavin's collarbone, somehow radiating a sense of laziness and ease despite the harsh movements of his tongue and teeth. He pulled back just slightly and traced his handiwork with his finger. God his fangs ached to be pulled out. To bite deeply into the skin and suck. 

He lapped at the skin again, letting his hand travel down to cup Gavin through his pants. Connor quickly turned them and pushed Gavin up onto the counter, moving to stand between his legs. 

"God, fuck Connor." Gavin mumbled, running his hands through Connor curls, tugging softly. "You really do like using your mouth, huh." 

Connor growled and bit down on the soft skin, his eyes fluttering closed. 

"Ow!" Gavin cursed and Connor jumped back, eyes wide as he stared at the small bite marks. His teeth had slipped out. 

Fuck, oh shit. Shit, this wasn't good. God, he could smell the blood and his hands trembled with want and lust. He covered his mouth and couldn't seem to stop staring at the small pinprick of blood on Gavin's throat. 

"Jeeze, those are some sharp teeth, not that I'm complaining." Gavin chuckled and reached forward to Connor but he quickly stepped back. "Hey, it doesn't hurt. Seriously, I'm fine. I like it, a little blood won't kill anyone." 

But he didn't know. He couldn't know that Connor couldn't do anything. He couldn't seem to put his fangs back. There was no way he could kiss Gavin, do anything with his mouth, at this point. "Uh, I'm not sure…" 

"Dude, what the actual fuck? Why the hell did you stop and why are you covering your damn mouth?" Gavin jumped off the counter and grabbed Connor's hand, pulling it down. 

Connor kept his mouth shut, hoping it wouldn't be obvious, that his fangs wouldn't be obvious. 

"Fucking hell, if you didn't want to that's fine, just could have said something." Gavin huffed and let go of Connor's hand. The look in his eyes broke Connor, there was so much sadness and hurt that he couldn't just stand there. 

"No! I want to!" He said and saw Gavin's eyes widen. 

He stood completely still as Gavin's hands slowly moved up and took his jaw, pushing his mouth open. Connor stared at the floor, unable to resist as Gavin stared silently. 

Then he felt fingers gently push at the fangs, making them both gaps when it gently nicked Gavin's thumb. "Holy shit, these are real." 

Gavin pulled his thumb back and started at the small drop of blood. Connor's fangs weren't like knives, they were specifically made to go through human skin and tissue with ease and as little pain once in as possible. 

Connor nodded but kept his mouth open for Gavin's inspection. He couldn't help the startled chuckle when Gavin looked at the fangs from every angle he could, trying to see if it was somehow fake. "There's literally no way this is actually happening. I must be fucking dreaming." 

"Ah, you're not. Though I can have someone come and make you forget this, you won't remember anything from the moment you got into the bathroom." He knew for a fact at least two fae and probably a warlock worked at the DPD as well. They weren't necessarily friends but he knew he could call them if need be. 

"Um, no thanks. I'd like to remember the fact that you're a fucking vampire. Like the hell?" Gavin let go of Connor's face and crossed his arms. "Are there more of you?" 

What was he supposed to say? It wasn't like anyone had found out about his secret fully before. Sure, some had been suspicious but nothing like this. He never let it get this far. "Um, yeah? I don't know how many, though." 

Maybe he could just leave out the rest of The Society and hope Gavin didn't ask. "Vampires aren't too common but we aren't too rare either. I know a few others but I haven't talked to some in like a hundred years or so, I should probably reach out." He really needed to stop talking. 

Gavin's mouth dropped open and he stared blankly at Connor before blinking. "You're shitting me. You're over a hundred years old." 

"I um, I'm 722 years old." God, he felt old just saying that but compared to others in The Society he was actually young. The others in it all had tendencies to live very long lives from their natural magic. 

Gavin ran a hand over his face and groaned. "Of course you are. Damn, do you actually kill people? Wait, shit were you going to kill me?" 

"No!" Connor put his hands up quickly. "I swear we don't kill people. Or at least most of us don't, there's always the bad apple. But I swear I didn't even mean for them to come out, I uh got excited and you smell really good and I'm really fucking hungry. I'm so sorry." Great now he was rambling. He was going to have to wipe Gavin's memory at this point. No way in hell he could get around it. 

Gavin stared at him once again and Connor winced. His teeth still ached but he kept himself rooted in the spot. He'd never drink from an unwilling human, that was a major taboo and a line he would never cross. Bt fuck if Gavin didn't smell good. 

"It won't kill me?" Gavin finally asked. Connor frowned but shook his head. "And you're hungry, and I smell good? Like in the blood way or like nice cologne dude way?" 

"I am, I've been low for a bit, and both? I don't know why but you've always smelled really good. I'm so sorry, that's weird." It was genuinely impolite to talk about a person's blood, like how you don't point out if someone has a pimple. 

Gavin hummed and nodded his head before moving back and pushing himself back up onto the counter. He tilted his head to the side and smirked at Connor. "Then bite me." 

"Wait, what?" There was no way in hell he heard that right. There was absolutely no way Gavin Reed wanted him to actually bite and suck his blood. Connor hadn't even told him the benefits (or side effects depending on who you talked to) of being bitten. The problems that could come with. 

"I said, bite me. You're hungry, I'm willing and honestly, it's kinda hot. So just do it." The way Gavin stared him down left no room for questioning. He actually wanted this, and from the looks of it was very interested. 

Connor slowly moved forward, looking for any sign of unease or doubt, but Gavin only tilted his head farther to the side. "I should warn you about the effects." He mumbled, eyes now fully trained on the softness of Gavin's neck. 

He ran his fingers over the skin, feeling the strong and fast heartbeat, the blood flowing quickly. He leaned forward and let himself fully sniff, nuzzling into the skin slightly before panting. "It can cause calmness and uh… it can act as an aphrodisiac." He kissed the skin and felt Gavin shutter under him. 

He lapped at the skin for a second before dragging his fangs over the skin, not hard enough to draw blood yet. "I won't do this unless you tell me I absolutely can even knowing what it can do to you." It wasn't like they had contracts humans could fill as a consent form, but he kinda wishes there was. Maybe one day if The Society ever decided to stop hiding in plain sight. 

Gavin huffed and reached up, grabbing a fistful of Connor's hair and yanking. "I said, fucking bite me you bitch." 

Connor whined at the pain but his eyes fluttered shut for a second before he nodded. He gently took Gavin's neck in his hand, giving it a slow soft squeeze. He had him at such a good angle, so soft and pliant. 

He finally let his fangs drag over the spot where Gavin's heartbeat was the strongest then bit down in one fluid motion. 

Gavin gasped and his hips bucked forward into Connor, and it only caused him to bite deeper. The first taste of blood had Connor's mind reeling. It was as good as it smelled and he drank slowly, savoring every last drop. 

He could feel all of Gavin's muscles start to relax under his hands, and he quickly put his arms around him to keep him up. Yet Gavin seemed to be trying to get closer, and Connor growled deep in his throat. 

"Fuck yes, this feels so good." Gavin mumbled, and Connor couldn't help but agree. He could feel his strength slowly returning and his senses heightened to their peek yet he didn't release yet. "Keep going, please Con." 

He didn't have to be told twice. He made sure not to suck too much too fast, not needing Gavin to get light-headed, but the side effects of being bit would also help with that. It would make sure Gavin would quickly replenish his own blood naturally. Yay for evolution. 

Connor moved a hand down again and felt Gavin completely hard under his hand. He licked at the skin as much as he could as he drank. He'd never tasted anything this wonderful in his very long life. 

He slowly slid his fangs out once he had enough and was sure it wasn't too much for Gavin either. He licked at the wounds and watched as they slowly healed over only leaving what looked to be a normal hickey. "Thank you." 

Gavin whined and moved to crush their lips together. Connor didn't even have time to retract his fangs before Gavin's tongue was pushing into his mouth and dragging along the tips. 

Connor froze for a second before melting into it, letting Gavin explore and play all he wanted. He fumbled at Gavin supple for a second before gently picking him up with one hand and sliding Gavin's pants and underwear down. 

Gavin let out a squeak but his pupils were blown wide. "Holy shit, you did that like it was nothing. Like I didn't weigh anything!" 

"That's because to me you don't, you're as light as a feather." He smirked at the look of pure lust on Gavin's face. He had no idea the human would love this so much but fuck if he wasn't happy that he did. It was like his first feeding all over again with the amount of pure energy that raged inside him. 

"That's so unfair." Gavin sighed but quickly snapped his mouth closed as Connor took him in hand. "Ah! God that feels good." 

Connor chuckled and circled the head with his thumb before dragging his hand down then snapping it back up. He leaned forward and licked over and kissed every inch of Gavin's throat possible, letting his fangs scrape against the skin. 

Then he let go and crouched down, nipping at the insides of Gavin's thighs. "Oh fuck!" The man cursed hands going into Connor's hair again. "Shit, just like that Con." 

Connor looked up and grinned widely at him before sliding his teeth back in and licking his lips. 

He saw the look of absolute shock as Connor's lips wrapped around the head of his cock. Gavin's body arched and pushed himself deeper into Connor's mouth who took it without complaint. Connor sucked, swirling his tongue as he pulled off before enveloping Gavin's cock in the heat of his mouth again. 

He tastes so good even like this, he loved the way the man squirmed and pulled at Connor's hair. He loved the choked sounds he made and the moans and curses. Each little sound filling the bathroom and echoing around them. 

Connor sucked his cock all the way to the back of his throat in one fluid motion, sliding down on his cock until his lips touched Gavin's abdomen. 

"Fuck, I'm close!" Gavin hissed and Connor quickly pulled back with a wet pop. "Hey! Fuck why'd you stop, you ass?"

Connor hummed and pretended to think for a second. "Well, I wanted to see if you could come from me biting you, but I guess I can go back to this if you want." 

Gavin's eyes widened considerably and Connor had to hide his smirk. "Oh fuck you, get your pointy ass teeth back up here. I sure as hell can come from that." 

Connor gladly complied, moving back up before glancing down at himself. "Let me take this off so it doesn't get dirty." He quickly unbuttoned his shirt and slid his pants down, palming himself for a second. "You're so beautiful." He mumbled. 

Gavin whined and reached forward, hands moving over Connor's warm skin. "Fuck you, you're gorgeous. Is that part of being a vampire too?" 

"Ah, most of us are more…Attractive to lure people in but I was born like this. Most of us just look normal now from evolution." The hands on his chest were so distracting he struggled to get his words out. 

"Still not fair, now are you going to bite me or what?" Gavin asked, pulling Connor flush against him. 

Connor opened his mouth and let Gavin watched as his fangs came out. "I won't suck any more blood, though. Too much too fast can be dangerous and lead to passing out or other effects." It was like damn medication commercials, he felt like he needed to list every possible negative effect just in case. 

"I really couldn't give two shits right now." Connor nodded and tilted Gavin's head so he'd bite on the side he hasn't done before. The bite areas were always a bit sensitive afterward and he didn't want to push it too far. 

He grabbed Gavin again and quickly pumped his fist, not warning Gavin this time before biting down. Gavin jolted forward and let out a silent scream, fingers scrapping down Connor's back hard enough to leave angry red marks. 

Connor hissed and rocked his hips forward, but kept pumping his hand, not even caring that his hand and stomach was becoming a sticky mess. 

He kept there until Gavin went completely limp in his arms, panting against his neck. He once again licked over the area, just to make sure it would heal before pressing a gentle kiss to it. "So good, Gavin. Did so good for me." 

Gavin mumbled something Connor couldn't understand, but it didn't matter. He had Gavin in his arms and he hadn't run screaming when he saw his fangs. Oh my god, he'd made Gavin come, actually come, from biting him. 

"I think I have a new kink." Gavin sighed out before pulling back slightly to see Connor, a lazy smile on his face. "That felt way too good. If you… if you ever need to uh, drink?" Connor gave a small nod. "Ok, if you ever need to drink, I'm so fucking down." 

Connor's eyes widened at the offer. "Are you sure? I'll have to, well it's not like we have an actual government but no one can know. No humans are supposed to know. I'm supposed to wipe your memory." He hated the idea, he didn't want Gavin to forget. 

"I won't tell, I promise. Not like anyone would believe me anyway. But I'm sure. Though, I do believe I should return the favor." Gavin glanced down at Connor's still hard cock. "Would you like me to take care of that for you?" 

"God yes." Connor sighed out, sliding his teeth back in. 

"Don't put those away just yet, I like them out." Gavin said, tapping Connor's lips. "Who knows, I might just want to get bitten again."

[bladekindeyewear]

HS^2 bloggin’ mainline 2020-05-31

Mainline upd8 before the June break.  More Terezi!  That should put me in a better mood. (1 edit (2020-06-01) since posting)

> CHAPTER 10. 1 WOND3R WH4T TH3Y T4ST3 L1K3

Wait, fuzzily waking up seeing the new planet?

Wait, why is the site background still black?

Wait, is this one of the new alien race members just created?

That would explain the chapter title.  (Especially if they were part plant, but Terezi would say that regardless, when you think about it.)

> ==>

Coming more into focus.

> ==>

Oh!  Back to the normal background.

TEREZI: W3LL

She’s not the one seeing this, so is this an alien perspective or does Rose’s visual processing take a while to turn back on post-warranty-breach?

> ==>

Huh?  It WAS her point of view?

So this:

--is just an attempt at rendering her smell-o-vision?

I know her sense of smell is supposed to be amazing, but this is MARKEDLY less paint-like than previous depictions of her smell-o-vision.  See for comparison:

Was this an intentional difference in clarity? Laziness? Her scent-vision being sharper?  They’re practically making us feel like her eyes are healed again, which would be disastrous, and not something even Ultimate Rose should necessarily be capable of.

(I’m inclined to give them less credit than usual today, though, so a poor visual choice most likely.)

TEREZI: TH4T W4S PR3TTY FUCK1NG STUP1D

Hate-screwing Rosebot?  Why?

I guess it’d leave you sore.

> ==>

TEREZI: F4LL1NG 4SL33P H3R3 1S JUST 4SK1NG FOR TROUBL3

Oh.  Are the new races - or their precursor “experiments” running around?

> ==>

TEREZI: NODD1NG OFF L1K3 TH4T UND3RN34TH 4N 4RBOR34L 4MBUL4TOR TEREZI: WHO KNOWS WH4T COULD H4V3 H4PP3N3D TEREZI: Y34H 4LR1GHT, 4LR1GHT TEREZI: G3T OFF MY C4S3 4BOUT 1T ALR34DY TEREZI: 1TS NOT L1K3 1 D1D 1T ON PURPOS3

Is Terezi talking to her other selves or something?  Or another brain ghost?

TEREZI: W3R3 JUST LUCKY TH3R3 1SNT 4NY W1ND 4T TH3 MOM3NT TEREZI: 1V3 3ST4BL1SH3D TH4T TH1S 1S WHY TH3Y MOV3 TEREZI: TH3 4MBUL4TORS 4R3 PL4NTS IN THE STR1CT S3NS3, BUT EXH1B1T LOCOMOT1V3 B3H4V1OUR DU3 TO TH31R UN1QU3 CONSTRUCT1ON

Ooh, moving trees.  Nice.

TEREZI: TH3 M41N BODY OF THE PL4NT CONS1STS OF A N3TWORK OF HOLLOW, TUB3LIKE GROWTHS THROUGH WH1CH 41R M4Y TR4V3L TEREZI: TH3S3 N3TWORKS 4R3 SO SOPH1ST1C4T3D TH4T TH3 SH1FT1NG PR3SSUR3 1NS1D3 TH3 TRUNK 4ND BR4NCH3S C4N C4US3 TH3 3NT1R3 PL4NT TO UPROOT 1TS3LF 4ND B3G1N "W4LK1NG", PROV1D3D TH3 COND1T1ONS 4R3 R1GHT TEREZI: TH1S PROC3SS, WH1L3 M4J3ST1C, C4N H4V3 DR4ST1C 3FF3CTS ON TH3 PL4NTS SURROUND1NGS

I know you like to eat them, but when did your analysis of plantlife get so clinical?  Do you have Aranea blabbing in your ear or something?

Oh.  OH, wait.  They have a Command Station.  Is Rose communicating with her remotely via that, and Terezi is just Dave-like vocalizing everything Rose punches into the terminal?  Then that would be Terezi arguing with HER out loud.  And the sudden transition of talk to “I’ve established that this is why they move.” is very Rose-sounding.

> ==>

That lil’ “hup” pose to jump over the gap Terezi’s making is adorable.  Also, those are bad failed experiments y’all have created and you should feel bad, Rose and Dirk.  (Rose is definitely to blame for this spider-bunny nightmare.)

TEREZI: HUP!

Hup

TEREZI: 1 WOND3R WH4T TH3Y T4ST3 L1K3 >:O

They look like they’d taste like bee spiders with inedible stuffing throughout.

Trolls do find grubs of most sorts appetizing though.

> ==>

TEREZI THOSE ARE NO REASON TO BE HAPPY

> ==>

Yeah, beautiful field-shot aside I feel pretty bad for that creation.  Looks miserable.

> ==>

Now they’re just mashing up consorts.  Are they TRYING to populate the planet with weird garbage for the final products to eat?  (Or fight? Hard-troll-childhood style?)

> ==>

THAT THING IS NO REASON TO LOOK SO HAPPY EITHER REZI

Gosh, at least she’s having fun though.

> ==>

You’re ignoring Onionsan, Terezi

> ==>

I wonder what lazy name this Horsisaur has.

Fun abandoned. Survival instincts fully engaged. Terezi runs.

She throws backward sniffs over her shoulder as she tears through the scrubby cling of the planet’s undergrowth, catching fractured impressions of exactly what has decided to chase her. A shuddering, 20 foot monstrosity that somehow seems to both scamper and glide, like a centipede, rustling like foliage as it moves, as if an entire goddamn forest is bearing down on her.

Between the game and Alternia, you shouldn’t be TOO rusty at this, right?

The problem with using smells to navigate the world is that the unfamiliar can be difficult to parse. Every whiff over her shoulder gives her another blurry glimpse of what this beast is.

Yeah, smell is a little slower on the pickup than sight.

Rose shared her books with Terezi when she was on the ship, and her favorite by far was the compendium of the zoologically dubious. Everything contained inside was just so unbelievably unlikely. This creature appears to be a combination of all of them.

Really? What we see of it doesn’t look THAT weird.  But we only see about half of it from this angle, so.

--Twisted ankle?  Come on, you’re not THAT rusty.

> ==>

It’s fear, pure and simple. Unsurprising, when being menaced by a monster, but it also doesn’t last for more than a second. A cold flame that instantly burns itself out, and all of a sudden she is just deeply, impossibly, indescribably tired. Down to her bones.

You’re already giving up??!?

Honestly, she really has no right to feel this... this fatigue. This crushing embrace of endless struggle. Terezi Pyrope has not had an easy life by anyone’s standards, but so much of her thirteen or so sweeps has just been standing still. Waiting. Huddling blind and half dead in her recuperacoon, the sopor burning the hideous mess that the sun has left her eyes, alight with a hatred so layered and intense that she couldn’t make sense of it.

Dammit, do we have to go SO EXHAUSTINGLY DEEPLY into EVERY SINGLE CHARACTER’S PTSD?!??

It was horrifying--that pain or fury--but also, admittedly, very boring. Then there were the sweeps on the meteor, the endless, gelatinous stretches of time in the chaos of the outer ring, searching for... Vriska, ostensibly, but also maybe just for a chance to dry up. To disappear. Go extinct.

Terezi doesn’t know if it’s an attribute of her aspect, or the sheer psychic damage of spending so long in the company of two humans with god complexes. Maybe it’s just an inherited symptom of being conscious. But sometimes it feels like none of them are going to get out of this, alive or dead.

Fuck, apparently we are.  These writers don’t know how to let up.  Can’t we get a little more retroactive dwelling on how FUN some of their lives up til now were?  And then... maybe NOT only do that to contrast with how depressed they are now??  There was SO much delight in Homestuck amidst the hardship, and if you’re going to show us more of the hardship you have to show us more of the delight, too, or everything just gets pointlessly dark.

--ah, Rose redirected the command console to point to the monster and stopped it that way.

ROSE: I am devastated to report that those are really more vines than tentacles, and even worse, they aren’t mine.

Pff.

...Poking fun at the terminology for Patron Trolls, at this late date of all times.

TEREZI: D4V3 4ND 1 H4D 4 LOT 1N COMMON B4CK TH3N, OR 4T L34ST 1T F3LT L1K3 W3 D1D ROSE: As I have come to understand it, for a while at least, we were all being steered in the right direction by a debatably benevolent force. ROSE: One imposed on us by the game itself, even if we had yet to enter it. TEREZI: ... ROSE: You don’t believe me. TEREZI: NO, 1 DO TEREZI: 1T SOUNDS 1NCR3D1BLY DUMB AND UNL1K3LY BUT SO DO3S 3V3RYTH1NG 3LS3 TH4T H4PP3NS TO 4NY OF US

Terezi, don’t you know at least half as much about Skaia as anyone else here? Isn’t that what she’s talking about?

TEREZI: SO YOU 4R3 DO1NG TH3 S4M3 TH1NGS TO TH3S3 CR34TUR3S TH4T SOM3 OTH3R CR34TUR3S D1D TO YOU 4ND YOUR FR13NDS ROSE: I suppose that is a fair assessment. Although we were not our own creators. It was John who— DIRK: I hate to break up the recap episode, but we need to deal with this situation before it gets out of hand.

Wait, she’s talking about the Exiles?  Terezi TOLD Dave about the exiles helping them.  SHE was the one who told us how that worked!  Although I guess you could chalk her questions up to her not knowing one of those “terminals” was involved.

TEREZI: 4ND HOW 4R3 YOU H3R3 4NYW4Y? DIRK: I have administrative privileges. TEREZI: YOU H4V3 4DM1N1STR4T1V3 PR1V1L3G3S TO MY P4LMHUSK DIRK: Yes.

Was Terezi dictating to her palmhusk earlier?  Why was she talking for Rose’s part of the conversation earlier, but not now?  Was that a mistake?  Or did Rose switch off the terminal, despite her apparent confusion with the terminal now???

Opinion of HS^2... dropping... keep it together stop judging the comic so hard... NOT dropping off in quality... shh brain! Shoosh!!!

(Seriously though, don’t put ANY asks in my inbox about HS^2 dropping off in quality, even as much as I’M starting to complain.  Gotta keep my hopes up to keep enjoying myself as I keep going.)

ROSE: Don’t let it get to you. My father has a habit of appearing in places he’s not wanted.

You’re seriously just CALLING him that now?!??

DIRK: I was saying that we should get Terezi down from there before continuing our mining of the core themes in our personal narratives.

Ah, that’s why you used the terminology.

DIRK: I was saying that we should get Terezi down from there before continuing our mining of the core themes in our personal narratives. ROSE: Of course. I’ll take care of it. DIRK: Appreciate it. TEREZI: 1 W1SH YOU WOULDN’T DO TH4T WH3R3 1 C4N S33 1T DIRK: Do what? TEREZI: TH4T TH1NG WH3R3 YOU G3T P3OPL3 WHO 4R3 NOT M3 TO DO WH4T3V3R 1T 1S YOU W4NT TH3M TO TEREZI: M1ND CONTROL

Oh, damn.  That was a creepy order, then.  And is Rose STILL not wise to it?  Can Terezi and Dirk just TALK about the narrative control IN FRONT OF ROSE and have her not recognize it because of said control??? :C

TEREZI: WH4T TH3 FUCK 1S GO1NG ON DIRK: You can make more boots. TEREZI: 1M NOT T4LK1NG 4BOUT TH3 BOOTS, NOOKBR34TH TEREZI: 1 MEAN TH3 M3N4G3R13 FROM H3LL DIRK: Well, we’ve encountered a couple bumps along the road. TEREZI: YOU DONT S4Y

This is fun, but I can’t help but notice that Rose has completely stopped talking.  Fuck having Dirk flaunt this even harder just ups the creepiness even more.

TEREZI: YOU GUYS R34LLY SUCK 4T TH1S DIRK: Yeah, agreed. TEREZI: ... TEREZI: WOW, TH4T W4S MUCH L3SS P41NFUL 4ND LONG-W1ND3D TH4N 1 W4S 3XP3CT1NG 1T TO B3 DIRK: What was? TEREZI: CONV1NC1NG YOU TH4T 4LL OF TH3S3 "D3S1GNS" TH4T YOU H4V3 COM3 UP W1TH SUCK SH1T TEREZI: 1 THOUGHT YOU WOULD T3LL M3 TH4T 4LL OF 1T 1S P4RT OF SOM3 "GR4ND PL4N" TEREZI: TH4T TH3Y SUCK ON PURPOS3 OR SOM3TH1NG L1K3 TH4T DIRK: Well, it is a part of the grand plan. And they do suck on purpose. DIRK: But not on my purpose. DIRK: It’s Rose. She is remarkably bad at this. Voluntarily. TEREZI: DO YOU M34N TH4T SH3 1S TRY1NG TO S4BOT4G3 4LL OF YOUR GR4ND CR34T1ONS TEREZI: OH POW3RFUL GOD PR1NC3? DIRK: No, she’s playing the game. That part hasn’t been a problem. DIRK: I mean she is just making incredibly nonsensical decisions and refusing to back down, even when I up the ante to preposterous levels. DIRK: You should see some of the shit she’s come up with. I’m pretty sure I watched a vagina on legs walk by this morning. TEREZI: 1 DONT TH1NK 1 S4W TH4T ON3 DIRK: Despite her initial resistance, Rose has gone completely feral. TEREZI: YOU M34N TH4T SH3 1S H4V1NG FUN DIRK: Yes.

You loosened her morals so she’d be conscience-free to go full zoological playground, and she’s GOING full zoological playground.  What did you expect?

TEREZI: 4ND WH4T 1S WRONG W1TH 4 L1TTL3 B1T OF FUN YOUR H1GHN3SS? DIRK: Nothing. I got absolutely no problem with having a good time while we see to the boring and altogether completely frivolous task of seeding the future of this planet. DIRK: But she really TEREZI: YOU 3XP3CT3D H3R TO B3 TH3 ON3 TO HOLD YOU B4CK, 1NST34D OF TH3 OTH3R W4Y 4ROUND DIRK: No, that's not it. TEREZI: YES, 1 TH1NK 1T 1S 1T

What?  “Holding her back”?  How did this suddenly become about Dirk’s insecurity at his ectobiological skill?

DIRK: By project, do you mean that I expect Rose to be too much like myself? TEREZI: NO, 1 M34N TH3 OPPOS1T3 TEREZI: YOU 3XP3CT H3R TO B3 B3TT3R TH4N YOU TEREZI: YOU W4NT H3R TO PR3V3NT 4LL OF YOUR WORST T3ND3NC13S. TH3 W4Y 1 US3D TO W1TH VR1SK4 WH3N W3 W3R3 MO1R41LS

--Oh, you meant hold them back from going TOO FAR.  I see.  And also, the way Terezi and Vriska were “moirails” is the WORST example, and thus quite fitting to relate to this situation.  For their brief pale stint, Terezi never really STOPPED Vriska from doing ANYTHING. She just supported Vriska, while Vriska spewed some flattery Terezi’s way... and then proceeded to do whatever the fuck she wanted. Sometimes without telling her.  It was an AWFUL example of proper moirallegiance, as I covered in the above link.

Dirk wouldn’t know about that, though.  And neither does Terezi, apparently, unless she’s just not admitting it.

(EDIT: Also, Rose never had the slightest chance of ever holding Dirk back like she might have wanted because DIRK MIND CONTROL OVERRIDES HER EVERY TIME SHE HAS RESERVATIONS. The only way a moirallegiance can work at all is if the one being held back is WILLING to listen. Dirk has deliberately and continuously suppressed Rose's ability to even THINK about dissuading him from literally any course of action.)

TEREZI: YOUR3 3XP3CT1NG ROS3 TO C4TCH YOU WH3N YOU GO TOO F4R TEREZI: SH3 1SNT GO1NG TO DO TH4T, 1 DONT TH1NK TEREZI: 1N F4CT, 1 TH1NK SH3 1S MOR3 L1K3LY TO GO TOO F4R TH4N YOU 4R3 DIRK: What makes you say that? TEREZI: 1 DONT KNOW TEREZI: JUST 4 F33L1NG, 1 GU3SS. 1 M1GHT NOT B3 4 GOD-MODD3D DORK 1N COSPL4Y, BUT 1M ST1LL A S33R TEREZI: 4ND 1 H4VE SP3NT W4Y MOR3 T1M3 W1TH TH3 TWO OF YOU TH4N 4LMOST 4NYON3 ELSE, WH1CH 1S 1NCR3D1BLY D3PR3SS1NG TO TH1NK 4BOUT

Guh.  A real pair of villains.  Is that REALLY why you brought Rose, Dirk?

TEREZI: 4NYW4Y, 1F YOU DONT L1K3 TH3 W4Y ROS3 1S DO1NG TH1NGS WHY DONT YOU JUST NOT-M1ND CONTROL H3R 1NTO DO1NG 1T TH3 R1GHT W4Y TEREZI: PROBL3M SOLV3D DIRK: I’ve made the decision to freehand this one. I’m not planning to influence Rose’s decision in any part of the contest. Otherwise it’s too easy, and barely worth doing at all.

Obviously.  And you can’t argue her down the normal way because she was NEVER someone to listen to someone like you in a direct confrontation without any misleading subterfuge.  You would’ve had to Doc Scratch it.

DIRK: So you’re saying you want me to mind-control Rose. TEREZI: NO, 1M S4Y1NG TH4T 1 TH1NK YOU 4R3 4 COW4RD TEREZI: P3RH4PS 1 W1LL T3LL H3R TH4T YOU H4V3 B33N WH1SP3R1NG YOUR STR4NG3 L1TTL3 1NC4NT4T1ONS 1N H3R 34R OV3R TH3 L4ST F3W SW33PS TEREZI: L1K3 4 CR33PY W31RDO DIRK: No, you won’t. If you were going to, you would have already.

Are you talking about the narrative mind control or are you talking about something else?  Something weirder?  Because calling them “strange little incantations” sounds like he’s been doing some creepily Doc-Scratchy grooming to her like how Doc kinda rage-controlled the trolls to write his genetic code on their walls in their most vulnerable moments.

DIRK: Unless you think I’m still projecting my "image" of what I think Rose "should" do, and she actually won’t give a shit. TEREZI: NO, 1 TH1NK SH3 W1LL B3 CONFL1CT3D TEREZI: UNL3SS YOU M1ND-CONTROL H3R NOT TO B3 DIRK: Not mind control. TEREZI: WH4T3VER!

And that’s just it.  Rose WOULD have been very conflicted about MUCH of this if you hadn’t used your narrative control to override all her inhibitions.  So instead you get the version of her who would have gone with your plans without hesitation, which is the WORST version of her.  And she doesn’t even have a choice to be better.

Alright, that’s the end of the upd8.  See y’all!  Maybe a bit after the commentary goes up for this (already has for the Influencers bonus) I’ll cover the commentary on both this and the bonus, but that’ll be in at least a few days.  Ciao

[bonatosca]

Airplane

J-Hope X Reader

Word count: 2,9k

Warnings: Unprotected sex - curse words

“Flight to South-Korea is in 10 minutes dear, you can already go to the gate it won’t be a long walk” the woman at the counter says to you. You nod and thanked her, grabbed your backpack and started walking towards your gate. It wasn’t crowded today so you could pass the security in no time and was within 5 minutes at your gate. You are studying in the Netherlands for a few years, but every vacation time you have time to visit your family back in Korea. Your family always wants you to fly as private as possible, well they actually did, since it kinda is a private jet you are flying today. You knew you would be flying with maybe one or two other people and that’s it. It’s nice to have a private fly, but it is way to expensive, but yeah it was already too late to swap your tickets, your family literally wanted the best for you, even if it means they won't have money left. Knowing that you always buy a bag of snacks, cookie’s or whatever they don’t have in korea that is Dutch. You see another person coming towards your gate, followed by a companion. He is looking overly happy. Thinking you might have seen him somewhere someday, but you just can’t remember it at all. Maybe he is just a famous guy or something. “Hey are you also on this flight? I heard that I wasn’t the only one taking this one, well except my bodyguard then” He smiles. Gosh he looks gorgeous you think by yourself. You collect yourself from staring at the handsome guy. “Ah yes, I am going to visit my family. Name’s Y/N, and yours?” You bowed and smiled at him to be polite. 

He puts his hand out and you grab his to greet “Name is J-Hope, but you can also call me Hoseok!” he smiles happily “I kind of hope you don’t know me” he mumbled trying to speak as soft as possible so you won’t hear it. You laugh, you did hear him saying that. “Yeah sorry I don’t know you so we are good, but I kinda think I have seen you from somewhere, but I just can’t remember where from” 

“Ah well then that’s fine for me, I have way to many fangirls around me lately so I just hoped I would have had a quiet flight, so I am kinda happy this time that you don’t know me” He smiles. It kinda sounds sad you know, having fangirls screaming and walking and stalking everywhere you go, it sounds horrible. Yes he is a good looking guy and you can’t deny that. But following someone? Come on that’s like stalking!

“I think we need to get our flight Mister Hoseok” his bodyguard says. He nodded and followed him, he turned around “Hey are you coming to or are you trying to forget this flight?” he said in a funny manner. 

“Yeah I am coming, sorry I was distracted for some reason, fangirls you say huh, must be horrible being followed everyday?” He just nodded at your question and smiled at you. It kind of looks like he is trying to smile, but isn’t in his power to do so. 

It’s sad how hard idols have it, they always have to make every fan happy, but that is almost impossible.

You walked towards a seat that isn’t taken by Hoseok. His bodyguard walked towards the cockpit. A stewardess walked towards us explaining safety rules and the other normal stuff that needs to be done or said. 

Not even five minutes later you start to deport from the airport. Clicking in your belt, and ready to watch out of the plane. You loved flying, it’s thrilling and always beautiful above the land. 

Just within a few minutes you could lose your belt, the stewardess asks something to drink or eat. You order a sprite and some chicken noodles, “Oh give me one to please!” Hoseok says. 

“Coming right up sir” She says and boils more water for us. 

“So you like Sprite to huh?” Hoseok says with a smile while he stands up and walked towards you.  You nodded “Yeah it’s my favourite drink to go” 

“CHICKEN NOODLE SOUP AND A SODA TO THE SIDE” his phone blares out. “Shit shit, sorry, did it scare you? It’s my ringtone, my friend tried to call me just now” You just laugh at him, he kinda is a goofy happy kid tho. 

“Ahah it’s ok” You smile, while getting your noodles and drinks. You are hungry as heck, so yeah your noodles were in your belly within minutes. You look to your side, Hoseok already done eating and looking out the window. Kind of looks like he has a dark shadow around him.

“Hey, is everything ok? You seem tired, while you kind of look like a bubbly person” Shit shouldn’t have said it. He looked at you questionable “Ah shit sorry, shouldn’t ask you something so personal while I just met you” You slammed your hand against your head “Stupid stupid” you mumble.

“Ah no it’s ok, it’s just, it’s tiring being an idol, you can’t even do things you want you know. I can’t go to a theme park without getting recognized, but it’s something you give op when you can make way more people happy” he smiles a bit. He does sound like he needs a cheering.

“Ah well but you can’t give happiness unless you are happy right? But it’s sweet that you want all the people you love, to be happy. But you don’t even get to get a girlfriend? Because yeah it’s human to get into a relationship” 

He just shrugs “I want to you know, but I am afraid they will take advantage of me, I have money and I am kind of known, so yeah there would probably be a lot of girls that to it to have all that” You nod, knowing there would be indeed a lot, your ex-boyfriend was kind of like that.

“I had the same situation, well not fully tho, but he took advantage of me for only my money, he ran away with 5 thousand euros that was for my education here in the Netherlands, but I got it covered and got all the money back so I am good” You smiled, knowing you had won that against your ex. 

“Wow that’s.. harsh yeah, some people are just plain stupid” He looked at you with a pout. DAMN he is not only handsome but also cute as heck!

“Miss, Sir, you can grab a drink from the bar if needed. If you need me, I will be in my own cabin part. If you want any Alcohol, you firstly come to me, since it’s locked, I will come again within a few hours for more food if needed” You nodded and thanked her before you where all alone in the plane with Hoseok. You stand up and walk towards the small bar and sit on the bar crutch. You look around, not seeing any cameras in here, which you thought they would have. 

“I asked a plane that won’t have cameras in. I am followed enough so I just wanted some peace” Hoseok sits beside you with his elbow resting on the bar and his had in his hand looking at you. “You are pretty cute you know?” He blurs out of nothing. You almost choke on your drink.

“Oh shit, ah sorry and euh thank you” you stand up, feeling you need to go to the bathroom. “I uh gotta get to the bathroom, sorry” He nods, and you walk towards the bathroom, open the door and “HOLY SHIT” you scream. Hoseok comes running up to you “Something's wrong?” He asks in concern, you had a shock face on, and faced Hoseok, almost head bumping on how close he was against you. “Ah, no nothing it’s just.. it’s so big” you said not knowing it kind of turned the guy in front of you on. 

“That’s not the only thing that’s big” he smirks, pushes you in the bathroom, and locked the door behind him. You were kind of shocked but you all let it happen, you let him lead you. “Is it ok if we just do it? I kind of need it, and you kind of turned me on in some way so yeah” You looked at his pants, seeing a huge bulge. You just blinked, not answering. Felling lips on yours, hands roaming on your back, you kiss him back.

You let him be yours for now, and he deepens the kiss, intensifying it more. Hands that were roaming on your back, lowered towards your butt, you let out a moan at the sudden touch. Breaking the kiss he whispers in your ear “Thank god you have a skirt on, it will me much easier to do so” he begins kissing your neck. Your hands now tucking on his hair lightly, you loved having your hands in someone else's hair. 

You wanted more as you pushed yourself towards Hoseok. “Ah Hoseok please more!” he reacts immediately and lifts up your skirt, making one hand it’s way towards your clothed folds, while the other one goes to one of your boobs. “Ah.. Hmmm.. shit!” You feel yourself getting wetter and wetter very fast.

“Shit you are soaked for me, you want me already that much? I haven’t even touched you a bit!” he faces you and gives you a peck before putting your pantie’s all the way down to your ankles. “You ready to get eaten out yet?” he said while placing you on the toilet. “Shit. just.. JUST GET TO IT” You immediately spread your legs. “Well someone is ready” he says licking his lips.

Getting on his knees he grabs your legs and puts them over his shoulders and starts kissing your inner legs, slowly towards your private part. You tug your hands once again in his hair, trying to get what you want, him eating you out. “Not so fast honey” he says and grabs your hand. “Touch yourself first” you do as he says, and you put one finger in your pussy, moaning at your own touch, wanting him even more. It’s such a turn on when someone watches you doing something to yourself.

Hoseok stands up taking of his trousers and pantie’s together, showing of his huge dick in front of you. You just looked at him in shock. Shit will he fit in me? He smirks almost knowing what you were thinking “It will fit honey, it will, I will promise, move your finger aside” he puts his tip against your entrance, looking at you for permission as you nod he puts his length in one slam fully inside of you. You grab the sides of the toileT “AAHH SHITT” you scraeam out, and immediately cover your mouth not wanting to let anyone hear you both.

“Told you it would fit” He laughs and starts to pump in and out of you, “Fuck, you are so tight, shit I love it” he half moans, pushing his head against yours while you fuck away. “Just a quicky please” he says.

You grab the sides of his face, “Go ahead, I don’t mind, shit” You feel yourself almost coming, his pace is so fast so hard, yet it’s still good, well not good but amazing at the same damn time, like how, it never is amazing when you have a quicky with someone, it mostly feels boring and way to fast to do so. 

You put your hands on his back, nails scratching as you feel yourself coming closer and closer.

“A fuck, w-w-where can I come?” he says, knowing he is about to come as well. “In me please… Ah fack! In me! I .. aagg hmm.. taking pills so don’t .. mm… worry” almost out of breath you struggle to say something to him but it still works. “Shit, come together with me please” he begs, feeling closer as before. You start to shudder underneath him, being very close as he spreads his seed inside you, you also come with him. 

He stays on top of you for a few seconds, then stands up, grabs a few tissues to clean you up and after that himself. He holds out his hand for you, you grab his to stand, still wobbly you almost fall over, he grabs you sturdy. “Hey don’t fall over, sorry if I was rough with you” he says, being a bit concerned with puppy looks in his eyes. “I will go outside for now so you can collect yourself for a bit, don't be hasty ok? Scream for my name if you need anything, wait do you need some water? I will pour some for you when you get back ok?” You laugh at him on how adorable he is. 

“It’s ok, I will be there in a minute, thanks Hoseok” You stand on your tippy toes to kiss his nose. He just jumps in the air from happiness and runs out of the bathroom. “He kinda is a fun goofball” you laugh at yourself, grabbing your phone and looking at your SNS for some distraction for a minute or so to collect yourself. First thing you see “J-Hope from BTS is coming back to Korea, departing from Amsterdam, The Netherlands on a private jet” There was even a video underneath it of his so called BTS group, you take a slight listen to the song ‘Boy With Luv FT. Halsey’ 

“Oh shit they are good, wait, that is the same Hoseok that is in here with me” You stand up, feeling fine already, while still watching the video you step out of the bathroom, slowly walking towards the bar.

“So this is your group then huh, you guys are pretty good” You said while looking at him. He nods while he hands you a glass of water “Yep that’s us!”

“Now I know where I have seen you from before, you are in BTS, aah well then that explains all the crazy fans, sorry about them” You say.

“It’s ok, you cheered me up and distracted me from the horrible things that could happen. You know I love our fans, but some are way to much” You nod at him, exactly thinking you could kind of understand him. “You should take a nap, we have a few more hours to go before we arrive in Seoul” he says, while leading you towards your chair, putting you in it, grabbing a blanket and putting it around you, tucking you in.

“Thank you Hoseok, you are a real nice gentleman” you say as you try to hold in a yawn. 

“No, thank you actually, wait give me your phone” he says, you gave him your phone. “Here you have my number now, and I have yours. You sound like a nice girl to talk to, but remember: Important Business when we arrive ok? That’s what I say overseas, not wanting to get attention or be around other fans or whatever, it’s just for your safety” He smiles. He walks towards his own chair, you look at him getting comfortable as your eyes went shut. Almost in Korea you were woken up by the stewardess handing you a small croissant saying you got it from Hoseok who was already eating his dinner “Miss you have to eat something before we arrive, we will arrive in ten minutes” You slowly rise your chair to sit straight up. Thanked her and ate your croissant. “Thank you, and good morning Hoseok” He looks at you, with a huge smile on your face “No problem! It’s my treat anyways!” 

Having eaten your croissant, you buckle your belt before landing. The plane is coming down softly to the ground. “Finally home” You say soft, “Yes indeed, finally home indeed” Hoseok smiles. 

When the plane is on it’s place you stand up, Hoseok almost running towards you and grabbing you in a hug. “It was a good flight my flight mate! I liked it for the very first time being alone, I will see you again someday, and don’t forget to text me ok! Byee!” He waves as he almost runs out of the plane, you wave at him as he looks back and waves back. You walk slowly out of the plane by yourself, getting out of your gates walking towards the exit, seeing lots of fans waiting for Hoseok, or well J-Hope from BTS, they all scream at him. You smile knowing he feels better now than yesterday when you departed from Amsterdam. 

You look for your family in the huge crowd, and funny to think you actually found them “Y/N I AM HERE, SIS I AM HERE HERE HERE HERE” You hear your little sister Yeri screaming your name as loud as she can. Gosh she is such an annoying brat. 

You walk towards your little sister and your mom, hugging them both. “How was your flight honey? Did you enjoy it?” You nodded. “It was great, thanks Mom, I brought a lot of snacks for you!” You said happily, your sister hugs you even tighter “CAN I TASTE THEM NOW?!” 

“Yeri! Shut your rude mouth! Not now, when we are home, come on dear, we need to get going” your mother grabs you by your arm softly as you walked away, before getting into the car you see hoseok waving at you in the distance, you wave back and grabbed your phone.

“So when is the next flight to the Netherlands for you? I really liked the bathroom flight ;)” You texted him and put your phone away, smiling your way down towards home.

_______________________________________________ So well yes I got my friend way to much into BTS. First it was GOT7, then TxT and now she is overly obsessed with BTS.  And she was kind of sad that there weren’t much smut fanfictions of her BTS bias Hobi.  Well I kinda was thinking of his song Airplane and imediatly got this idea. Hope you like it! <3 Part 2: Airplane part 2.

[tsumtsum-into-omiomi]

CHAPTER FIVE: KUDO STREET

warning(s): cursing

word count: 1.8k

previous chapter | masterlist | next chapter

AO3

When Kudo Street was first established, it was what the name suggests; a street. However, businesses there were able to pick up at a rapid growth without humans' intervention because Taishi was a secluded magic town so it became a favourite stop for magic merchants from all over the world. They mostly brought in potion ingredients and recipes and pentagram scriptures since those were tough to find after practitioners had to find new lands when the purge happened. It wasn't long before words spread among them that Kudo Street had everything that they needed, which was all it took for the practitioners to start teleporting to Taishi.

 Demands then began to skyrocket, attracting traders to settle down in Taishi to open all kinds of shops on the street and supply magical goods, even rare ones, for local practitioners and non. Its popularity only grew bigger ever since and from there, little by little, the street expanded into the commercial park that it is today. Kudo Street now houses hundreds of stores where you can find anything magical you can think of and wish for.

 "Come on, now," Atsumu calls to get you off the marble platform, "or the next teleporter will bump into you."

 You let out one last pant as you exit the cubicle, "I'm tired."

 "You're so out of shape," Osamu comments. The three of you walk together following the paved walkway towards the hustle and bustle up ahead.

 "I'm not!" you snap at him, "obviously a girl can't carry two boys who are bigger than her??"

 He responds in a mocking voice, "oBviOusLy a gIrL caN't cArRy twO bOYs whO aRe-"

 "Damn, why are there so many people?" Atsumu cuts him off, directing your and Osamu's attention forward and indirectly stopping your bickering. He's right. You can see heavy traffic at the entrance, which is a huge black metal archway with climbing red roses decorating it. Its apex holds golden letters that spell out "Kudo Street".

 "Wow, there are a lot of fairies today," you take notice of the numerous specks of glitters the size of a thumb flying in between people.

 "Don't get lost," Atsumu grabs your hand, worried that you'd get separated from them in the crowd because of the distraction.

 "Oh yeah, I think they opened a few more shops here," Osamu also watches the winged tiny people buzzing everywhere in all directions, "business must be good for them."

 "Well, why won't it be?" Atsumu joins, "not like we can get fairy dust anywhere else. I read they're accepting strawberries as their currency too now. One strawberry equals five blueberries."

 "Love how their economy is growing while ours is failing. Their prices have gone up, you know," Osamu comments, "100 grams of fairy dust is now 50 blueberries! Can't believe it used to be just 10 blueberries."

 "Who cares, I'd pay them as many blueberries as they want. They're so adorable in their glittery outfits!" you coo at two fairies carrying a strawberry together by its sepals, flying across your face before landing on a tree branch to eat the fruit.

 As soon as you pass through the arch, the stone walkway is spread out into multiple directions, connecting shops together on either side of it. Due to the unplanned growth of the street, various types of shops are scattered without a pattern. However, there are directories all over the place to guide you so before going further, you make a stop at a nearby one.

 "Should we go to the new stocks shop first?" you point a finger on the map, sifting through names under the category titled "Potion Ingredients". "What's its name again?"

 "Uh, what was it? It has a cringy name," Atsumu thinks aloud.

 "Is it this one?" your finger stops at "Stocks-holm Syndrome".

 "Lol yeah, that one," Osamu laughs, unironically entertained. "That's smart."

 "You gotta get a better sense of humour, man," Atsumu snorts, "that's east from here. Let's go."

 "As if you have a better one," Osamu retorts as the three of you start walking  (and bickering) again towards the east.

 "What does stocks have anything to do with the syndrome anyway?" Atsumu lifts an eyebrow at him.

 "Bet they just thought it's cool to use a One Direction song as their name," you roll your eyes.

 "Ew, do you really think only One Direction knows that syndrome?" Atsumu makes a face, "and does One Direction think they're cool for using it in their song?"

 "Bet they just thought it's gonna make them sound smart," Osamu scoffs.

 "Shut up, it's a good song and oh my God, you losers also listen to them. Stop dissing!" you hiss, hurt that your brothers are being disrespectful towards the most talented band in the world.

 "I only listen to WMYB and everybody does so it doesn't count," Atsumu shrugs.

 "Dude," Osamu looks at him in disbelief, "I think only fans could say What Makes You Beautiful's acronym in one breath effortlessly so you better shut up now."

 "Fuck off, Samu. Oh wow, there's a new potion shop," Atsumu diverts the topic not so elegantly.

 But you and Osamu take the bait and stop in your tracks thanks to the small crowd outside of the shop. Its glass panel door makes a delightful tinkling sound every time someone pushes it open. In the window display, you take notice of the cute potion bottles lined up neatly on a white fur mat. Multiple "Pink Potions' Opening Sale!" posters are also pasted on the glass wall. From where you're standing, you can tell that every corner of the place is painted with pastel pink, but what's really catching your attention to go inside for a better look is the complementing white and gold interior decoration.

 "Let's go in!" you rush inside, leaving your brothers no choice other than to follow you.

 The inside of the shop is as pretty as you expected it to be; the floor and poles are made of shiny marble, there is a chandelier hanging in the middle of the ceiling and potions are arranged on glass racks and labeled properly by their names and functions. Apart from that, you're also wowed by the products' packaging. It's not often for ready-made potions to be sold aesthetically so you're very intrigued by the glass vessels of different sizes and shapes that they come in. And the corks are pink too! Usually, they all are just packed in boring cylindrical bottles.

 You go through the aisles to see what type of potions they have and mostly, they're all common ones for healing (flu, insomnia, diarrhea, rashes, etc.)  and non-healing (iris colouring, muscle builder, bone growth, hair extension, etc.) purposes. Seeing how the shop focuses a lot on its branding, you are quite suspicious of its quality. You take one of the test tube shaped vessel that holds nail colouring potion and study the directions of use label that is stamped on it:

 "1. Consume potion after a proper meal. 2. Colour will show after 5-10 minutes."

 Okay, that's pretty normal for a nail colouring potion.

 "CAUTION: Use only as directed. Seek healer's advice if there are allergy reactions or discomfort after use."

 That's normal too.

 "Product is guaranteed to take effect for up to one month or we will return your money!"

 Oh wow, just a month? That's shit.

 On one hand, a healing potion's quality is usually defined by how effective it is for curing your illnesses and diseases. On the other hand, potions with non-healing properties (usually for body enhancements or alterations) are judged by how long its effects would last on one's body so one month is terrible. Good alteration potions should last you at least three months but oh well, there's no harm in trying this cute little stuff.

 You then bring the bottle with you to search for Atsumu, who you find is also looking at some potions two aisles away. He reaches for one of them and inspects its ingredient label, nodding away to himself. You arrive at his side and read the potion's name tag.

 "'Sleep Well, Sweet Dreams'? Why do you want sweet dreams?" you frown at him.

 "Why don't I want sweet dreams?" Atsumu retorts, frowning back at you.

 "Will it work?" Osamu appears from behind you, almost making you drop the bottle in your hand.

 "I doubt it," you remark, "pretty stuff is usually useless."

 "The ingredients look legit though," Atsumu lifts his shoulders, "guess I'll see if it works or not."

 "So you're getting that?" you prod.

 "Yeah," he shrugs again.

 "Ok then, Tsumu-nii channnnnn," you loop yourself around his arm with a sweet smile on your face, "can you pay for mine too, pleeeeeease? It's for my nails."

 "EUGH," Atsumu rolls his eyes, "leech!" but takes the potion that you picked anyway before heading for the counter, with you still hanging onto him like a koala.

 He places the two bottles on the counter and at the same time, Osamu slides another one in quietly.

 "Tsumu, can I get this," he whispers.

 Atsumu clicks his tongue, eyes gawking at his twin, "oi!"

 "Pleeease," Osamu averts his gaze, embarrassed that the cashier is watching the drama that is enfolding before him.

 Atsumu grabs Osamu's bottle to take a quick look at the label. "Taste bud enhancer?" he questions.

 "I wanna taste the difference between normal salt and sea salt," Osamu explains his intention, still whispering.

 Atsumu gives him a disbelief look, "weird ass bitch."

 "Fine, I'll put it back," Osamu pulls a face, extending his hand out to Atsumu.

 "Gosh, just take it," Atsumu returns the potion back to the cashier instead of Osamu's hand.

 "So... one receipt?" the cashier asks for confirmation, not missing the grin on Osamu's face.

 Atsumu sighs, "yes, please."

 Ah, yes. The curse of being an elder sibling; having to fund your younger siblings' ridiculous purchases along with your own.

previous chapter | masterlist | next chapter

AO3

Note: no one has been making fun of 1D so I had to

[jcurncy]

EP. 2: Seekers of the Sacred Jewel

OKAY THIS SHOULDVE GONE IN THE FIRST ONE BUT “IRON REAVER SOUL STEALER” WHO CAM UP W THAT

hOW THE HELL DID HE MAKE THOSE DEEP RUTA WITH HIS *CLAWS* IM-

sHE’S TELLING HIM TO SIT LIKE A DOG IM SCREAMMIIINNGGG I KNEW HE WAS A FURRY

does that ALSO make kagome a furry?

hIS CRIES OF PAIN EVERY TIME SHE TELLS HIM TO SIT

he uses the term old hag a lot in the sub

hE IS SUCH A DICK?! WHY DO I LIKE HIM?!

kagome is kikyo reincarnated gOT IT

aIGHT BUT SHES GOT PSYCHIC POWERS???

“They’re worshipping me!” VS “I gotta get outta here!” with the last being a p good reaction to the first

sharing food w a demon i see

iS THIS BRYCE PAPANEBROOK

does she ever get to go home? i want her to get to go home. </3

so he’s....fighting off other monsters....to pritect the jewel....which also means he’s protecting kagome. yeah THAT won’t get misinterpreted.

being kidnapped twice in three days must SUCK

bRUH HE JUST PUT HIS HAND UP HER SKIRT AND TUGGED IT IM GOING TO CRY!!! POOR KAGOME

dID ONE OF YOU CREEPS JUST *PROPOSE TO HER*?! WHAT THE HELL

“HERE I AM IN FEUDAL JAPAN PLAYING DUCK DUCK GOOSE WITH AN 8 FOOT TROLL!” VS “will somebody tell me why is it that me, who hasn’t done anything has to go through this??”

tbh the duck duck goose thing is funnier

i love that inuyasha’s like “i don’t care about the dumb girl she took the jewel”

i also love that w how often they say jewel we could just make it juul.

just in time to break tHE WHOLE DAMN SWORD

okay maybe i was wrong maybe half demon furry boy IS a hero

iM SORRY A BIRD DID *WHAT* TO HIS HEART?! HOW IS HER ALIVE?!

yeah i think it’s bryce papenbrook. hes good at yelling.

tHEYRE CALLED CORPSE CROWS I AM

he doesnt seem to get that sHE DOESNT KNOW SHIT ABOUT KIKYO OR BEING HER REINCARNATION

“it eats human flesh, imagine what’ll happen if it swallows the jewel” “iT SWALLOWED THE JEWEL” “aWH CMON KAGOME WHAT THE FUCK”

that was a beautiful shot to lead to a fail and i lOVE IT

iT JUST KIDNAPPED A KID OH MY GOSH

kAGOME IS A FUCKING QUEEN SAVING THIS KID

fUCK U FOR NOT SAVING THE KID INUYASHA

dID SHE RLY JUST BREAK THIS FUCKING JEWEL

thAT IS A LOT OF SHOOTING STARS

are we gonna have to run around collecting pieces like fucking knuckles the echidna?

aLSO INUYASHA SAW THE BIRD FACE COMING AND AUTOMATICALLY PROTECTED KAGOME I AM?!?! NOT BREATHING?!

so inuyasha is understandably upset that the jewel’s been shattered.

[serendipitioussurvival]

The Problem with Reality, Pt 2

<Prev> The Monologue of one Maczysz Stilinski/Hale

“They say that, when you die, your life flashes before your eyes. Honestly though? That’s such a load of bullshit. Do you have any idea how many times I’ve almost died? Do you know how many of those incidents I’ve seen a play by play of my life? None, not even when I actually fucking died! I’ve been cheated out of a lot of shit in my life, a lot of good shit too, so I’m going to do the play by play! Ahem.

I was born Maczysz Angelika Stilinski to humans Claudia Stilinski and Jeorek ‘John’ Stilinski. I was an angelic kid no matter what anyone says. The first few years of my life were great, eating, sleeping, pooping and having someone else clean it up. That was nice, I guess, but then I got to be introduced to the wonderful world of education. Let me tell you - hell doesn’t even need to exist when you have fucking ADHD and a hyperactive imagination, okay? Not only that, but you put it in the body of a girl whose father was a Deputy and whose mother was a nurse. I was literally exposed to so much information - as much as I could get my hands on!

Believe me, by the time I was six I knew how to hide keys until my dad made copies or had to use the backup. I had a key for his filing cabinets, for the car, and for the front and back doors. I was never going to use them for evil though, maybe to do things I wasn’t supposed to, but never for evil. Anyway, getting off-topic. So, by six I was bilingual for Portuguese and English, a hell of a combination for a kid with ADHD who could barely form coherent sentences, let alone sentences with words that weren’t English. 

BUT - it was because of that multilingual gibberish that I landed my best friend, Scott McCall, who also knew Portuguese from his mother and bam! A friendship that lasts throughout multiple realities thank you very much. Then… then I lost my mom. I won’t go into that, I don’t want to, you already know the full situation in detail and it’s still painful. I - it’s my one regret, that little Mischief will have to go through that again, all because I couldn’t save her…

Uh, where - where was I? Oh, anyway, mom died. Dad started drinking. I hated it, had to learn to cook and do laundry. He never hit me or cursed me or anything, but he would - I dunno just give me these looks. Like he was looking for any trace of my mom in me, or he would look at anything but me. So, in true Max fashion, I shaved all my hair off. Scott thought it was punk as hell and told me we were totally brothers now. Hehe, it never bothered me that he saw me as a guy, made me really happy honestly since all my dad could see was my mom in me. So I started spending the night over at his more, studied with him, ate with him and Mel while she taught me how to cook certain dishes - she even let me help, the few times she was free to actually do that. 

Then dickhead Rafe - and no I don’t care that it isn’t his real name, he doesn’t deserve to be called anything but Rafe because he hates it so goddamn much - went and left because he chose to drink instead of fixing things with his family after Scottie got hurt. Suddenly we really were siblings, either staying the night over at his while my dad worked over night, or over at mine when Mel worked overnight. We slept in the same bed until we were thirteen - which other people still find weird. Let me tell you, we didn’t stop until he got his first morning wood at fifteen, and we celebrated it because, for the longest time, my poor Scottie thought his dick was broken.

Can I - can I even cuss here? Like, I’m not going to get smited, smote - whatever. I’m already here, fuck it.

Continuing on! At sixteen Scottie and I went all red riding hood into the woods and met the one, the only, Peter Hale. He was half-crazed and the other half of him was running on wolfy instincts, but it was Peter, and the prick decided that he liked my jacket on Scottie and bit him, turning him into a werewolf. 

Fast forward a couple more months of Scott trying to kill me, his first full moon where he made out with my crush and cemented the fact that I was definitely not lesbian, and then we get to the juicy bits where Peter killed Kate Argent - I hope that bitch is being burned to death, repeatedly, in hell. In fact - could I, like if I don’t get into Heaven or whatever comes after this, can I go to hell just to burn her? Like, that’d be my heaven. No..? Okay. 

Ahem, anyway, uh, Scott hit Peter with a Molotov, killing him, but Peter is crafty so he came back to life a little more sane but no less sassy, and decided to grace my doorstep every few nights with a letter on my window. They weren’t love notes, in fact, I’m pretty sure the first one was him telling me that he wished he had bitten me even though I said no just so his legacy wouldn’t ride on Scott’s shoulders. Looking back it’s funny, but back then I was furious. How dare this sociopathic nut job think my best friend lacks anything. 

Peter though, was different. Maybe death really does change you? I dunno, either way, he became more involved in the pack - or, well, he got more involved whenever I was involved. He gave me the research material he’d put together as his family’s bestiary and helped to figure out how to ‘cure’ Jackson’s reptile problem. 

Then he helped to deal with the Alpha pack and saved me from being tossed off the roof of the hospital by Ennis. Ah, there was also Scott betraying us, me, for the first time. That was fun, I think - honestly I think that was the first time that I actually touched Peter? Like he was always touching me and brushing against my arm, but I think that had been the first time I had touched him. 

It wasn’t anything special, but he stopped my panic attack somehow, and that was great. He was also really firm - ah, nevermind. That’s - that, I was seventeen for crying out loud. Okay? His body was hella nice and his smirk pissed me off and aroused me even when I wanted to kill him again. That night though, it was kind of the turning point. I no longer thought of immediately killing him whenever he annoyed me. 

Then the Alpha pack was dealt with, Scott was a ‘True Alpha’, and Deucalion was sent off - which I still don’t agree with, but whatever, I fixed that shit. Deuce gets to see his baby girl grow up now and Gerard is totally burning in hell next to Kate. Hehe, can - like I feel like I’m definitely gonna be sent to hell, so can you like, assign me to them? It’s gotta be their personal hell to see me again. No..? Gosh, I can’t tell what you’re thinking or feeling with that damned mask, whatever. Continuing on with my flashbacks. Ahem!

What was next? Oh yes, the Nogitsune.”

[mirroring-mirrors]

Heathers (1989) Sentence Starters!

Dear Diary...

Real life sucks losers dry.

If you want to fuck with the eagles, you have to learn to fly.

You're beautiful!

What is your damage?

Do they even have Thanksgiving in Africa?

This wouldn't be that bizarro thing you were babbling about over the phone last night, would it?

Hey, I'm really sorry I couldn't make it to your birthday party last month.

Think I'd probably miss my own birthday for a date.

I was looking around the other day and I dug up.. these old photographs.

I was talking to somebody.

Check this out. You win five million dollars from the Publisher's Sweepstakes, and the same day that what’s-his-face gives you the check, aliens land on the earth and say they're going to blow up the world in two days. What do you do?

Why can't we talk to different kinds of people?

Fuck me gently with a chainsaw.

Do I look like Mother Theresa?

Does it not bother you that everybody in this school thinks that you're a piranha?

What are you gonna do with the money?

I'd pay Madonna a million bucks to sit on my face and have her ride like the Kentucky derby..

That's gotta be the most spooky-assed question I ever heard.

You wanted to be a member of the most powerful clique in school. If I wasn't already the head of it, I'd want the same thing.

You used to have a sense of humour.

You know, maybe you should see a doctor.

God, _____, drool much?

Greetings and salutations. 

There are no stupid questions.

That's the stupidest question I've ever heard.

Let's kick his ass!

We're too old for that kinda crap.

You gonna eat this?

What'd you say, dickhead?

Can you bleach out urine stains?

I thought you had given up on high school guys.

Did you have a brain tumour for breakfast? 

So, tonight's the night. Are you excited?

You blow it tonight, and it's "keggers with kids" all next year.

So, what was the first week of spring vacation withdrawal like?

Hey kid, isn't the prom coming up?

I gotta motor if I want to be ready for that party tonight.

Are you gonna pull a super-chug with that?

If you're nice, I'll let you buy me a slushie.

I see you know your convenience-speak pretty well.

That thing you pulled in the caf today was pretty severe.

Yeah well, the extreme always seems to make an impression.

Did you say a cherry or coke slushie?

Is your life perfect?

I don't really like my friends.

Maybe it's time to take a vacation.

I want to kill, and you have to believe it's for more than just selfish reasons

So, when you go to college, what subjects do you think you'll study?

How's my little cheerleader, huh? 

Come on, now look, I don't feel so good, okay?

Hey, let's do it on the coats, it'll be excellent, huh?

You know, I have a little prepared speech for my suitor when he wants more than I'm prepared to give him.

Save the speeches for Malcolm X. 

You don't deserve my fucking speech.

I sound like a fucking psycho!

You stupid fuck!

You goddamn bitch!

You were nothing before you met me.

Lick it up, baby. Lick.. it.. up..!

Monday morning, you're history.

I'll tell everyone about tonight. 

Dreadful etiquette, I apologise.

I saw the croquet set-up in the back. You up for a match?

Thank you, that was my first game of strip croquet.  

I use my grand IQ to decide what colour gloss to wear, and how to hit three keggers before curfew.

I say we just grow up, be adults and die. 

I'm a no-rust-build-up man, myself.

Don't be a dick. 

I think last night we both said a lot of stuff we didn't mean.

How the hell didcha get in here?

What did you do, put a phlegm globber in it or something?

I'm not gonna drink that piss.

Grow up!

You think I'll drink it just because you call me chicken? 

Just give me the cup, jerk. 

I just killed my best friend.

What're we gonna tell the cops?

I can't believe this is my life.

I'm gonna have to send my SAT scores to San Quentin instead of Stanford.

At least you got whatcha wanted, y'know?

It is one thing to want somebody out of your life, it is another thing to serve them a wake-up cup full of liquid drainer.

We did a murder, and that's a crime

You might think what I've done is shocking -

People think that just because you're beautiful and popular, life is easy and  fun.

I die knowing no-one knew the real me.

Have you done this before?

Keep things business as usual.

We must revel in this revealing moment. 

You call me when the shuttle lands.

Where's your urge to purge?

Sorry to hear about your friend. 

Let's talk emotions.

Are we going to be tested on this?

How many networks did you run to?

What're you talking about? You hated her, she hated you.

Gosh, pop, I almost forgot to introduce my girlfriend.

Goddamn will somebody tell me why I smoke these damn things?

I gotta motor if I want to be ready for that funeral.

Jesus, God in Heaven, why didcha kill such hot snatch? 

Jeez, people are so serious.

Hi, I'm sorry. 

I just want my high school to be a nice place. 

Did that sound bitchy?

So, we on tonight, man, or what?

That pudwacker just stepped on my foot.

When I get that feeling, I need sexual healing.

Sorry, I'm feeling a little superior tonight.  

Seven schools in seven states, and the only thing different is my locker combination.

Our love is God.

Let's go get a slushie.

The funeral yesterday must really have been rough, eh?

It's more tasteful than it sounds.

I left them drunk and flailing in cow shit.

No, don't shut up, I'd like to know exactly what I did.

Yeah, I didn't expect to be calling either, I just guess my emotions took over...

I was wondering if you wanted all those things you've been saying to really happen?

It's always been a fantasy of mine to have two guys at once. 

Listen, my Bonnie and Clyde days are over.

Do you take German?

Tell me the similarity is not incredible.

The joy we shared in each others arms was greater than any touch down, yet we were forced to live the lives of sexist, beer guzzling jock assholes.

I mean, if you don't have a brewski in your hand you might as well be wearing a dress.

So, should I just whip it out, or...?

I was kind of hoping you could rip my clothes off me, sport?

Did you miss him completely?

Hey, I heard something out there, I'm checking it out.

Does this answer your question?

You believed it, because you wanted to believe it.  

Your true feelings were to gross and icky for you to face.

I did not want them dead!

My teen angst bullshit has a body count.

Are we going to prom or to hell?

I've seen a lot of bullshit. 

Is this as good for you as it is for me?

I need a copy of all this by Monday for my Princeton application.

It was chaos, fucking chaos.

Chaos is great!  

Chaos is what killed the dinosaurs, darling.

We scare people into not being assholes!

God, you can be so immature!

Hey, they're playing our song!

That's it! We're breaking up!

You can't bring them back, you must know that.

I am not trying to bring anybody back, except maybe myself.

And to think there was a time when I actually thought you were cool!

Blow up a couple of toasters or something.

Kind of scary though that everybody has got a little story to tell. 

What is this? Blackmail?

I'll ask you to do me a favour, it'll be one you'll enjoy.

Don't you start getting cocky on me now.

Do you know I'm still a virgin?

Nice guys finish last. I should know.

Are you telling me this is not a time for troubled youth?

I don't patronise bunny rabbits!

I guess I picked the wrong time to be a human being.

You were out of control!

Hey babe, I need a name.

God has cursed me, I think.

What are you trying to do? Kill me?

That's about the least private thing I can think of.

If everyone jumped off a bridge, would you?

If you're happy every day of your life, you wouldn't be a human being, you'd be a game show host.

What do you say we knock off early and buy some shoes or something lame like that?

People love me!

People love you, but I know you. 

Some people need different kinds of convincing than others.

Don't talk to me like that, OK?

Jealous much?

Why are you such a mega bitch?

Want to go out tonight? Catch a movie, you know, some miniature golf?

I knew you'd be back... I knew it.

You were wrong, and I was right!                

You've been depressed lately. 

Get off of my bed, you fucking psycho! 

Do you think you're a rebel? Do you actually think you're a rebel?

You're not a rebel, you're a fucking psychotic!

What do you think I'm gonna do with it? Take out their tonsils?

I've got a meaningful marked-up Moby Dick, what else does a suicide need? 

Is this turning out weak, or what?

My afterlife is so boring.

If I have to sing Kumbaya one more time...

I loved you! Sure, I was coming up here to kill you...

Our burning bodies will be the ultimate protest to a society that degrades us. 

Talk about your suicide pacts, eh?

What do they want, a written invitation?

Whether to kill yourself or not is the most important decisions a teenager can make.

Put your hands on your head.

Do you think that just because you started this thing you can end it?

I'll kill you, I'll fucking kill you, I swear to God!

How do I turn off the goddamn bomb, asshole?

You want a clean slate as much as I do. 

The only place where different social types genuinely can get along with each other is in heaven.

Do you know what I'd love, babe? Cool guys like you out of my life.

You've got power... Power I didn't think you had.

Now that you're dead, what are you gonna do with your life?

You look like hell!

My date for the prom kind of flaked out on me...

I was wondering, if you aren't doing anything, maybe we could rent some new releases? Pop some popcorn?

[inquisitor-julia]

I was tagged by @i-dont-even-like-elves for the 11 questions ask meme thingy! Thank you so much for tagging me!! :)

1) THE LAST TIME YOU WERE HAPPY, IT WAS BECAUSE YOU ___.

i was at a place called Lazy 5 Ranch with my mom and brother and we were having a great time feeding all of the animals (though having a giant cow shove its head into your car to try to steal your bucket of food is mildly terrifying .-. )

2) WHAT’S THE BEST (OR STRANGEST, OR MOST UNEXPECTED) COMPLIMENT YOU’VE EVER RECEIVED?

I’m going to be really honest the one that i enjoyed the most was an anon message i got here on tumblr after posting a selfie (i think) and it just said “Your eyes remind me of true love pickles” to this day i don’t know exactly what that means or who sent it but i think about that a lot. 

3) BASED ON THE TALENTS YOU CURRENTLY POSSES, ARE YOU A WARRIOR, ROGUE, MAGE, OR BARD (OR IF NONE, NAME ANOTHER CLASS)? WHAT’S YOUR SIGNATURE SKILL? YOUR LEAST IMPRESSIVE SKILL?

I’m a mage, probably favoring elemental magic and/or nature magic. Not sure what my signature would be....but i’d probably be known for accidentally setting people’s hair or clothes on fire when i’m super mad at them ^^” my least impressive skill would be that (because of my nature magic) animals love me...which is already pretty true like let me tell you last time i went to the zoo my ex accused me of being a disney princess because i had a butterfly land on me and not want to leave even when i shook my hand a little (i ended up having to get it to land on someone else), i got the alligators to come over to us so we could see them, the tiger was absolutely 100% talking to me and rubbing his face on the fence, i was petting a parrot and when i stopped and started walking away he threw an absolute fit, AND i had a wild lizard crawl up my leg to ride around on my shoulder for a few minutes....

4) WHAT’S THE SONG THAT REMINDS YOU OF THE BEST NIGHT OF YOUR LIFE?

The one that comes to mind is “I Gotta Feeling” by The Black Eyed Peas because it reminds me of a time in middle school that all of my friends and i went to a corn maze together and...i just have really fond memories of hanging out with all of them in middle school :’) we’re still friends of course but we don’t have as much time to hang out like we used to

5) MUST PROTECT AT ALL COSTS: ____

COLE, Izuku Midoriya, Yuri Katsuki, Josephine Montilyet, 707, literally everyone in Voltron, the raptor squad in Jurassic World, Anders, ALISTAIR

6) WELL, SHIT. VARRIC’S WRITING A BOOK ABOUT YOUR EXPLOITS. WHAT’S THE TITLE?

“Really....that’s it?” is the only thing that came to mind lol my life would hardly make for an interesting read but if anyone could make it interesting i suppose it would be Varric

7) WHAT’S AN OBSESSION YOU HONESTLY HOPE NEVER GOES AWAY?

Dragon Age, anime, animals, dinosaurs, SCIENCE

8) WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO IN YOUR RETIREMENT?

oh good gosh i have no idea i’m only 21....i mean if i retired right now i’d probably learn to make mods, refine my art, maybe start taking commissions? If i have the money when i retire i want to travel...i’m not about to let a little age stop me from seeing the world. Though ideally i’d like to travel while i’m young =/

9) WHO WAS YOUR FIRST CRUSH OR HERO? WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THEM NOW?

My first crush that i can remember was probably James from Pokemon??? 

I still love James and I’m still weirdly attracted to him??

And my first hero who i looked up to and wanted to be like was Steve Irwin.

Steve Irwin is still really and truly what I aspire to be. To love life so much and be so excited about what you do and excited about the world around you? For me that’s the ideal. He respected animals and nature even the dangerous things and for me to grow up seeing that helped shape me into who i am today. I work at a vet’s office and my respect and understanding for the animals helps me get along with even some of the “mean” ones. I learned that respect from many people in my life but Steve Irwin was absolutely one of the greatest influences in helping me find that animals are my passion. :)

10) WHAT’S SOMETHING THAT OTHERS EXPECT YOU TO CARE ABOUT, BUT YOU SIMPLY DON’T?

hmmm....well every single time someone finds out i’m a vegan they think i support PETA or other preachy organizations and i absolutely don’t. PETA is awful but besides that i also don’t take part in that crazy veganism which involves policing what other people eat? I support animal rights but within reason. People are going to eat meat i just wish animals raised for meat or other products were treated more humanely. I also wish that workers in the food industry were treated better and paid more. I truly just want people to respect each other and the world around them. I’m a vegan for health reasons, you eat your bacon i literally don’t care if you eat three pounds of it in front of me (besides that i might worry about your health if you did that in one sitting)

that went a little off topic but I don’t care about PETA that was my original point ^^”

11) WHAT MYTH, FAIRY TALE, LEGEND, OR SUPERSTITION DO YOU MOST WISH WERE TRUE?

....does Harry Potter count because damn i want to go to Hogwarts

Ok so now i ask ten questions right? that is how this works?

1. What is your favorite dinosaur?

2. What kind of natural scenery appeals the most to you?

3. What smell (or smells) do you find comforting?

4. Do you collect anything?

5.  What two characters would you want as parents and why?

6. What is one physical feature about yourself that you like?

7. What is one thing about yourself (personality-wise etc.) that you like?

8. If your soul/spirit was represented by a color, what color would it be/would you want it to be?

9. Tell me about That Fic/Comic in your head that you’ll probably never write

10. What’s your favorite book/movie of all time and why did it speak to you so much?

11.  Tell me of a trope you don’t like, and one time you made an exception and actually enjoyed it in a work of fiction! That, or tell me about that one character that is not the type you usually like, and YET…

And I’ll tag...the first 11 people in my activity. Feel free to ignore this if you don’t want to fill it out! No pressure to do this!

@mmesnappysnips @alleiradayne @evillyte @star--nymph @please-pet-the-dread-wolf @queerantivan @empresstress13 @dragenage @aromagebloom @miriani-lavellan @irlaimsaaralath  @elevanetheirin and @i-dont-even-like-elves (if you’d like to do this again)

Thanks again for the tag! :)

[recentanimenews]

THE GREAT CRUNCHYROLL REWATCH Goes On An Escort Mission with Episodes 204 - 210

  Welcome back to THE GREAT CRUNCHYROLL NARUTO REWATCH. I'm Daniel Dockery, your host for this week's batch of episodes, and I gotta say, I'm gonna miss reading these writers' responses to whatever Naruto and His Amazing Friends happen to doing that week. It's got me feeling all sentimental, especially now that we only have two more weeks left. And it's because I was feeling so sentimental that I decided to approach my questions a little more...personally.

  Sure, I wanted their opinions on the latest round of filler, which included an overload of escort-style missions and some fun genjutsu use, but I mostly wanted to dive into their lives and see what makes them tick. What drives a person to watch Naruto and then answer questions about it each week? What lurks in the heart of a Sasuke fan? What are the hidden depths in a being that has committed a chunk of their lives to counting how many bowls of ramen a Shonen Jump character eats? And since I doubt we'll ever get a hard-hitting documentary about the hidden feelings of a Naruto fan, that means it's up to me to do the digging. Consider me your Anime Werner Herzog. 

  So let's dive in!

  Naruto sure does love its escort missions. There's two back-to-back in this set of episodes. What's your take on them? I know that, whenever a video game is like "Ya gotta get the professor to the control room and if he gets blasted, it's lights out!", I want to throw a PS4 out a window. And in anime, it's usually "Ya gotta protect this guy (that has a valuable secret that you won't learn about until it's waaaay too late." But I want to know your feelings.

Joseph: They're not as downright immediately awful in anime as they are in games, but they have to be handled interestingly. Naruto filler does not do that. This week's episodes were, through and through, interminable.

Paul: I don't mind escort missions in general, although as noted above, they all do tend to fall into the same "vital secret withheld" pattern. The living national treasure episode didn't work for me, because the secret artist, Shinemon, was so thoroughly detestable that -- despite attempts to humanize him that came far too late -- I would have been perfectly happy to see him dashed to bits on the rocks.

Kevin: I think I dislike the escort missions more on paper than I do in practice. At least by introducing someone to escort, the show goes to a new location and has a new character or two for Naruto and whoever else he's with to interact with. It's not handled particularly well most of the time, but at least it's an easy way to get something new-ish out of the filler.

Carolyn: Fetch quests < escort missions except in Resident Evil 4. As far as Naruto goes, I don't think it's the escort missions themselves that are the issue, so much as it's the repetitiveness of just about every storyline. But that's a whole other issue.

David: On one hand, escort missions make a lot of sense as something ninjas-for-hire would do frequently, especially the younger ones like our main characters who need the experience. On the other, we've talked enough here about all the more interesting ways "being a ninja" could be portrayed as a concept, so it does feel pretty lazy that they keep returning to this well.

Jared: We've certainly seen our fair share of these types of missions, so they're not terrible when watching compared to when you have to do them in a game, but the execution in the ones we saw this week is the problem. They really didn't bring anything new to the table that we hadn't already seen done better.

Danni: I'm pretty sure I'm the only one who made it through that one mission at the end of Metal Gear Solid 3 without failing on the first try, so as far as Naruto's escort missions go, I guess I didn't hate them. Gantetsu seems cool at least.

  Noelle: Escort missions in general are alright (in anime, not in games), but this one didn't really do it for for me. Lazy execution will bring anything down, really.

  Kara: I played City of Heroes and World of Warcraft so I tired of escort missions pretty quickly from a game standpoint. From a show standpoint, they can be interesting if they're done creatively. To their credit, neither of these even approached the annoyingness that was the rich kid ninja-for-a-day, but I would absolutely have murdered the sculptor and used the rest of the trip home to figure out a noble-sounding death for him.

  Gosh, we're in the home stretch, huh? So I want to know: How does it feel to have made Naruto a part of your weekly routine for so long? Is it something you look forward to? Did you ever have a problem fitting it into your week? Did you ever have to tell someone "No, I can't hang out. I've gotta see what these ninjas are up to"?

  Joseph: I looked forward to it for about 70% of the rewatch, so not bad! I never had to go too out of my way to keep it as part of my routine, but there was a time I had to make sure to download episodes on N*****x so I could watch while in England. Crunchy-hime, gomennasai.

Paul: Just this evening, I had to pass up walking the dog with my sister in order to catch the weekly ninja shenanigans. When we first started, I'd set aside a block of two specific dates and times each week to watch Naruto, but now I just shotgun all seven episodes as soon as the questions are available. It'll take adjustment to fill that Naruto-shaped hole in my schedule. Maybe I'll catch up on the 300+ episodes of One Piece I need to watch...

Kevin: A surprising amount of my life has started revolving around this Rewatch, to the point that I actively plan things like D&D sessions around knowing that questions normally come in on Wednesdays or Thursdays, so I need to either watch the week's episodes early or keep those days clear. At the same time, I'm legitimately looking forward to continuing the Rewatch into other shows and then to Shippuden, since watching these long form shounen series so quickly gives a different viewing experience than watching week to week.

Carolyn: There were definitely a few times I had to pass on things for Naruto but for the most part I was able to watch it while doing other work so it wasn't too inconvenient. I can't say it was the highlight, though the first few arcs definitely reminded me of why I was such a fan so many years ago and I was pleasantly surprised to find Naruto -- a former least favorite character -- is now one of my top favorite characters.

David: Back before this filler started, I would have said Naruto was one of the most highly anticipated parts of my week anime-wise. Now, uh, not so much. I'm looking forward to getting to Shippuden though.

Jared: It certainly feels weird that we're going to be done with OG Naruto in two weeks. As someone who hadn't watched a lick of Naruto before this, it's been fun. Although the filler at times has tested my patience with that. I've definitely had to maneuver some stuff around or make sure I don't record a podcast too late in order to watch episodes which has made for some interesting ways to make sure everything works out.

Danni: It's weird to think how I've ostensibly watched one episode of Naruto a day for nearly the entirety of 2019. To be fair though, I averaged nearly two episodes a day in the 10 months it took me to watch the entirety of the Dragon Ball series, so this just feels like a light continuation of that. I haven't given up on any social obligations to watch Naruto, but it has cut down on my available tea time with my students in Fire Emblem.

  Noelle: I never thought I'd be watching Naruto in 2019, but it's August and I sure did just that! It's been more a trip down memory lane for me, and I think I have a more updated perspective on some of the things I recall that were shaky. It's been pretty interesting comparing what I thought as a teenager to my impressions now, and it's been pretty amusing to see how some things haven't changed. The Rewatch is definitely something I have to specifically make time for in my schedule though.

  Kara: My friends now joke that I'm "watching Naruto for a living." I honestly thought this was going to be like pulling teeth. Really, only the filler has been like that. I was pleasantly surprised to find it's enjoyable at its best. Also couldn't help but do a bit of a double take this week when the words "It's Naruto, he'll be fine" were spoken unironically. How times have changed.

  Are there any points in your life that you regard as filler arcs? I remember taking golf lessons for a week when I was 23, which seemed super out of character for me, since I find golf amazingly dull. So I look back on that as "non-canon Daniel." Is there anything like that from your own life that anime fans would argue isn't part of the official timeline of You?

  Joseph: Off the top of my head, I've been pretty damn canon for my entire run. There were a couple months where I lived in LA to help my friend direct his graduation short, but that was more of a NaruJoe Gaiden. Surely some of the six (6!) years I spent farting around in college were filler, though.

Paul: My filler moments would be when I've struggled with bouts of serious depression. Those portions of my life feel hazy and unreal, and if it turned out that I were merely a character in someone else's comic book, I suspect those would be the awkward bits where they fired the previous writers and artists, and the editors had to fake it until a new batch came along.

Kevin: I lived with my parents for about 18 months after graduating college, just looking for some kind of employment. Day in and day out, basically just lounging around home, occasionally having bursts of productivity by applying to a bunch of jobs all at once. This is also the time when I was seriously studying Japanese and picking up mobile gaming. Near the end, I got a seasonal job working for Target and then started writing features for Crunchyroll. I think that's about as filler as it gets, even down to changing up the formula to stave off boredom.

Carolyn: I had to think about this for quite a long time. I'm not certain I can say there was much that I could call filler except possibly my education, which is kind of depressing. I first started going to college for an elementary education degree before realizing I don't actually have the patience to be a teacher. Later I got a certificate in medical transcription/billing and coding ... and did nothing with it. It's all worked out, but those would have to be the filler arcs, I guess.

David: I spent my first semester of college working on a music degree only for my interest in that to peter out halfway through and basically wasting my time for the rest of the year until I found an interest in computer science, so that's probably the closest.

Jared: For me, I'd probably go with all the choices I went through before settling on what I eventually graduated college with. So, there was the long filler arc where I thought I was going to be an automotive mechanic. That transitioned into the very brief web designer arc. After that was the dark time where I had to work at Walmart for two years after dropping out. Finally, there would've been the journalism arc that would eventually transition me onto the English path that would take me out of college.

Danni: My life is a filler arc.

  Noelle: This is a tough question... I do think a lot of things in my life have lead up to where I am now, even if I did feel they were useless at the time. Maybe all the summers I spent at summer camp; I don't think I retained anything particularly useful from those experiences, except for maybe a Pokemon card or two.

  Kara: I think my almost ten years working for a mainstream news website would constitute that. It started out okay, but then it was just a lot of time-killing with very little new scenery. Turning in my notice and becoming a freelancer was scary, but it really did feel like moving on to a new chapter. Which isn't to say every day is super-exciting plot progression, but at least I'm not seeing the same things over and over with slightly different character designs.

  Okay, in our Naruto slack chat channel, there's a debate going on about genjutsu and how useful it is. So, to give us a little more #content, I wanna know your feelings about it here:

  Joseph: It seems pretty useful, but only at an absurdly high level. I'm a huge sucker for illusions so I don't mind the fact that it's just that most of the time. In these particular filler eps, there's an instance where if you fall in imaginary Genjutsu lava, your body actually thinks it's burning and you could die as a result. I'm not going to put much stock in Filler Power Logic, though, so I dunno. I guess it's just a cool concept rather than one I think is super useful all the time. Freddy Krueger uses Genjutsu, so there's that.

Paul: I actively enjoyed the Yakumo arc, although I feel like having so many Kurama clan members with String-Bean Genjutsu was wasted potential. One of my favorite science fiction films is Forbidden Planet, which also features a super-powered id beast running amok. I know some others were arguing that genjutsu is weak as heck, but applied properly, I think it can be one of the deadliest and most inventive tricks in the ninja arsenal, especially when it fools the brain into damaging the body.

  Kevin: I'm the one who started the discussion, so my thoughts are already well known in the channel. For the audience though: I feel like Genjutsu is almost objectively the worst possible thing to specialize in for a Naruto character. Taijutsu basically lets you bench press mountains and ninjutsu seems to let you do pretty much anything magical, and they both allow you to outright kill your opponent. Meanwhile, outside of the insanely powerful genjutsu shown in this week's episodes and the one that Itachi likes using, genjutsu only ever seems to immobilize the opponent.

On its own, that might be fine, since you could stop them and then kill them easily, but even schoolchildren know how to dispel low level genjutsu, and Kuranai showed that when that doesn't work, you can just stab yourself once to get out of a genjutsu. Not ideal obviously, but much easier to defeat than a man moving faster than the eye can see, or a kid trying to stab you with a ball of lightning.

For some of the others:

Ninja tools (Tenten): Not seen often and also a contender for worst option because of how rarely Tenten gets to win at anything. But being able to summon pretty much any number of any weapon has a lot of versatility.

Ninja animals (Kiba, Shino, etc.): They always seem to end up being more useful than I would expect them to be, while genjutsu always ends up being more boring than I would expect.

Kekkei Genkai: Because they don't need to follow the same rules as standard jutsu, the creators have more freedom to be imaginative with what the abilities can do.

Medical ninjutsu: Always useful in keeping people alive (brought back everyone's favorite bowlcut, after all), and Kabuto showed how it can be used offensively. Tsunade also hasn't showed how powerful medical jutsus can get, yet.

Sealing: We haven't seen much of it yet, but what we know is that if you can't kill something, you can seal it away. Maybe not the most practical specialization on a day-to-day basic, but exceptionally useful when needed.

A different group chat I'm in actually came up with a great way to make genjutsu more engaging, and it's basically what Shikamaru does with his Shadow Possession jutsu. Instead of the ninja casting a genjutsu and then basically nothing happening until either the person under the jutsu breaks out or someone comes along to help them get out, the genjutsu creates an opening for someone else to attack, creating combos and interesting combat scenarios.

  Carolyn: Yeah, I have to agree with Joseph. Even if the logic doesn't exactly make sense, anything that deals with mind-bending and reality manipulation is a plus in my book.

    David: It makes sense to me that genjutsu could be seen as the least useful ninja art to practice if you're a normal person in this world, but in the context of the show where the focus tends to be on the most powerful characters, everything except genjutsu feels completely underpowered. So it depends on your lot in life I suppose.

  Jared: We've certainly seen instances of lower level Genjutsu where it seems easy to get out of and know you're under the influence of it. In that instance, it would probably be less beneficial than other forms of jutsu, but if you have a knack for being a high level practitioner of it, then I'd say it's pretty beneficial. Especially as seen here where you can basically trick the brain into believing everything is real and have it cause legitimate damage. The amount of people who are going to be able to operate on that high of a level is going to be slim though, which makes it seem weaker than what it can actually be.

  Danni: Evo was this past weekend, so I've been thinking of genjutsu like a high-skill ceiling fighting game character. For low level shinobi, genjutsu is so easily countered that it's never a viable option. You're better off polishing your skills taijutsu + ninjutsu combos. However, when a real master sits down and devotes themselves to genjutsu, their ability is almost godlike.

  Noelle: I think I agree most with the sentiment that low-level genjutsu is pretty harmless, but high-level genjutsu is deadly. After all, it does rely on tricking the senses, and if you've lost control of your primary senses, then what is there to trust? They may seem like fun and games, but hallucinations in the real world are bewildering enough as is. Sensory adjustment being weaponized can be downright deadly in the right circumstances.

  Kara: Like Paul, I really enjoyed the Yakumo arc. This was a very "made for me" story, between the genjutsu and the taming of the Id monster - that's all stuff I love. Personally I enjoyed how much time was spent developing the idea of genjutsu: that a lot of it is our mind working against us, and in many cases the more intelligent you are, the harder it gets you. Plus our brains are our own worst enemy, so of course it would be terrifying to have them turn against us. I'd honestly rather be kicked in the face a hundred times than live out some sort of eldritch nightmare I couldn't escape, "real" or not.

  Do y'all like ramen? What's your favorite kind? I know that this isn't very relevant to the episodes, but we've been keeping a ramen count for about eight months and I haven't seen much discussion about how y'all actually feel about ramen. I personally really dig it.

  Joseph: Going back to LA, there's a spot my friend and I were hooked on in Little Tokyo called Orochon Ramen. We were training ourselves to stand up to the spiciest number, but never quite made it there. I would sweat INTO my ramen bowl, It was deliciously excruciating, or excruciatingly delicious; whichever sounds better. I think it did level up my spiciness in general!

  Paul: I've had proper ramen from a proper Japanese ramen restaurant in New York City, but, hypocrite that I am, I actually prefer the store-bought stuff from Nissin and Maruchan. I enjoy the pork flavor, which they label as "Oriental flavor" for some unknown reason.

  Kevin: I'll be perfectly honest, Naruto is the reason I started eating ramen more than a decade ago, and I still probably have a bowl or two per week. It's just so simple to make! Boil some chicken broth, add the noodles, add anything frozen (like peas), wait a few minutes until you can break up the block of noodles, add any other vegetables/eggs/whatever, simmer for a few minutes to cook things through, top with green onion if you feel fancy, serve. I also add soy sauce and ginger for a bit more flavorful broth. Maybe 10 or 15 minutes or so to get a bowl full of tastiness. Great for any time that you don't have a better idea for what to eat.

  Carolyn: I've never had real ramen and I really, really want to. The pork flavor labeled "Pork flavor" is the actual best of the store-bought stuff. Sorry, Paul. Oh, and also the mushroom flavor that doesn't even exist anymore. We can cancel shrimp and chili.

  David: Some friends of mine live next to a good ramen place so I like going there when I get the chance, but otherwise I can't say I eat it often. My diet is pretty terrible actually, being mostly frozen meals and the occasional actual food on days where I feel like I have more free time.

  Jared: I've also never had legitimate ramen, so all I have to go off of is the store bought kind and even then I can't remember the last time I had that.

  Danni: When I was in Japan I went to a grocery store and bought some random cups of instant ramen, which turned out to be curry-flavored, and I love me some curry. I ended up bringing a bunch home with me when I left. I currently have one left in my reserves, but I just can't bring myself to eat it and say goodbye to my curry-flavored ramen yet.

  Noelle: Ramen is my go-to food when I don't feel like putting a lot of effort into cooking. I love it! I usually end up eating tonkotsu or shoyu. In restaurants, I like mine with a good helping of char-siu.

  Kara: I started eating ramen when I was very little because my uncle, who was between college and grad school and living with my grandparents and me at the time, had it for lunch every day. (I thought he was cool, which he is, and I wanted to be like him.) He had beef with a slice of Swiss cheese melted on it. I had vegetable with white American cheese on it and eventually "graduated" to beef (though still with cheese). I've had proper ramen and I really enjoy it when it's possible to get it, but sometimes I just crave college food.

  And highs and lows, I guess:

  Joseph: These'll be quick. My high for the week was the concept of Dropout Ninja. I love the idea of unaffiliated bad dudes who decided to quit school and, presumably, set up a Foot Clan-esque underground network. The low is the Yakumo arc. So much drawn-out explanation for what should have otherwise been a pretty neat bit of intrigue and backstory.

Paul: My high point is the id beast from the Yakumo Arc, because the idea of being betrayed by one's own subconscious is a conflict that I groove on. Honorable mention goes to Kurenai being a quintessential shinobi by being willing to endure misplaced vengeance rather than allowing her student to come to harm. My low point is the sheer number of waterfalls that Naruto got tossed over. Two waterfalls in as many episodes is a Wile E. Coyote thing.

  Kevin: High - Cat-in-the-Craddle ninja. I honestly thought about putting him as my low point, or at least as a head scratching choice for how strange an ability it is, but he's one of the few things that really sticks out to me in this batch of episodes, and I actually do like seeing versatile skillsets, even if they've stopped even pretending to be ninja-inspired.

Low - The guy who made the national treasure. I'm so annoyed by basically everything he ever did that I'm not even bothering to look up his name. He started as a jerk and ended as a jerk. Congratulations, now get out and never come back.

  Carolyn: High point, like I mentioned earlier, would have to be the illusions. That stuff is just always fun for me. Low point, yeah, smugness is a no go.

  David: My high point is the concept behind the Yakumo Rescue arc, especially Yakumo herself, practically jumping into the show as a viewer with being inspired by Rock Lee and all. Low point is just how long that arc is - five episodes is about two too many, so it lost a lot of luster along the way.

  Jared: High point this week was some of the different and spookier styles the show tried to implement in the Yakumo arc, albeit briefly. Outside of that though, the low points would probably be everything else with that arc going too long and the other episodes just being basic concepts we've seen executed better elsewhere.

  Danni: My high point is the Yakumo arc, just because of the parallels her situation had with Naruto's. The weakest part of Naruto in my opinion is how little it bothers delving into the fact that Naruto has a giant, murderous demon sealed inside of him that almost definitely killed his parents. Seeing him recognize the similarities between them and make a silent vow to master his own terrifying power was great, and hopefully will become more significant in Shippuden.

  My low point is...also the Yakumo arc. It's just so unfortunately incongruous with the actual mainline plot. If Kurenai had been tasked with this mission for some time, why did she only just now decide that she's unfit to command her team? Also, I imagine that despite Yakumo's incredible power one day being very much needed in the Hidden Leaf Village, no one will ever say a word about or mention her ever again. Yakumo deserves to be canon, dang it!

Noelle: High point, illusions definitely! I like the idea of using horror when it works, and I think they did a decent enough job in doing so. Low point, the general sense of repetition and overall, I think some points stretched far too long. This could've used some trimming and compression.

Kara: High point is the Yakumo arc in general, with special focus on the horror imagery and Id monster. There were some genuine "NOPE" visuals in there (Yakumo's portrait grabbing her and talking to her), not to mention Sakura opening a door and looking out into the void of space and just screaming.

Low point was the freakin' "national treasure" sculptor who spent the whole episode mocking our lads for not dying on the job. I hope Akamaru got an extra spray on him before they kicked him out of the village.

  And for the weekly numbers:

Counters Week- Ramen: 0 bowls + 3 cups Hokage: 0 Clones: 94 + 2 uncountable scenes Total- Ramen: 201 bowls, 17 cups Hokage: 62 Clones: 912

  And that’s it for this week! Remember that you’re always welcome to watch along with the Rewatch, especially if you’ve never seen the original Naruto! Watch Naruto today!

  Here’s our upcoming schedule:

-On August 16th, NICOLE MEJIAS finishes up a mission!

-And finally, on August 23rd, CAYLA COATES wraps up the Rewatch in its entirety!

CATCH UP ON THE REWATCH!

Episodes 197-203: Solving a Mystery

Episodes 190-196: Matchmaking Gone Wrong

Episodes 183-189: No Laughter Allowed!

Episodes 176-182: Reach for the Stars!

Episodes 169-175: Anko’s Backstory At Sea

Episodes 162-168: The Tale of the Phantom Samurai

Episodes 155-161: Quickfire Curry

Episodes 148-154: The Forest is Abuzz With Ninjas

Episodes 141-147: Mizuki Strikes Back!

Episodes 134-140: The Climactic Clash

Episodes 127-133: Naruto vs Sasuke

Episodes 120-126: The Sand Siblings Return

Episodes 113-119: Operation Rescue Sasuke

Episodes 106-112: Sasuke Goes Rogue

Episodes 99-105: Trouble in the Land of Tea

Episodes 92-98: Clash of the Sannin

Episodes 85-91: A Life-Changing Decision

Episodes 78-84: The Fall of a Legend

Episodes 71-77: Sands of Sorrow

Episodes 64-70: Crashing the Chunin Exam

Episodes 57-63: Family Feud

Episodes 50-56: Rock Lee Rally

Episodes 43-49: The Gate

Episodes 36-42: Through the Woods

Episodes 29-35: Sakura Unleashed

Episodes 22-28: Chunin Exams Kickoff

Episodes 15-21: Leaving the Land of Waves

Episodes 8-14: Beginners' Battle

Episodes 1-7: I'm Gonna Be the Hokage!

  Thank you for joining us for the GREAT CRUNCHYROLL NARUTO REWATCH! See you next time!

  Have anything to say about this batch of episodes? Let us know in the comments! We're accepting questions and comments for next week, so ask away!

----------------------------------

Anime Werner Herzog is a writer and editor for Crunchyroll. You should follow him on Twitter!

By: news+feed@crunchyroll.com

[nochu-kookies]

Addiction Pt.2

A/N: I accidentally posted this on the wrong blog so im reposting it again on the right blog...sigh. I’m sorry for getting a bit lazy on this chapter….it mainly has dialogue than descriptions…I’ll work harder on the chapters in the future!

If you haven’t read: Part1

“Yah! You can’t keep drinking so much,” Taehyung yelled in frustration.

“Does it matter? I’m wasted anyways.” Nari took the glass and took it down in one shot.

“One more!”

“Nari-ah, I’m taking you home. You’re already drunk.” Taehyung carerfully picked her up on his back and headed outside. Nari was drooling all over Taehyung black coat. Damn she’s heavier than she looks.

He walked up the staircase around the corner to find her ex-boyfriend at her door again.

“Nari-ah,” Jimin said in a soft tone.

“Why are you here,” Taehyung asked sternly.

“Why can’t I be? I am her boyfriend”

Taehyung smirked judging his possessivness. “No, you’re not. She broke up with you. Dont you get it?”

“Look she drunk because of me, She is drunk because she misses me.”

“No she’s drunk because of me,” Taehyung said without hesitation. “I let her drink too much.” Jimin glanced up at Nari’s drooling face back to Taehyung. “Who are you?”

“I’m her boyfriend. What are you going to do about it?”

“Tch, since when did you become her boyfriend.”

“She is already over you. I think it’s time you do the same too.”

“Yah don’t do anything to my Nari.”

Ignoring his comment, Taehyung unlocked the door to Nari’s apartment using the key hiden under the welcome carpet. He shut the door in Jimin’s face before he could say another word. He placed her gently on her bed. Her smell was fragrant like a rose.  Her scent trickled from her hair to the tips of her toes. Taehyung didn’t want to resist but he knew he couldn’t do her when she is  drunk. He undressed her leaving her in her undergarments and tucked her under the blankets. Nari’s phone started ringing again. It was Jimin.

Gosh he’s really stubborn.

Taehyung went into the other room and laid on the couch. Every spec of Nari’s apartment lingered with her scent. Taehyung couldn’t control his senses. It was dark night, the time when a vampire’s instincts come to action. He was indecisive whether to leave because he didn’t want to leave her alone. He kept himself all night beating the urge to prey. Once morning arrived his eyes were exhausted and red.

Nari woke up to a migraine and a sick stomach. I must have been at the bar last night. Wait who took me home? Not Jimin… Could it be Taehyung? Nari sat up on the bed scratching her head trying to recall what happened last night. Just then Taehyung entered the room. Nari burst out the room to the bathroom and vomited her guts out. Taehyung knelt down beside her rubbing her back, “I made some Haejangguk [pork based soup that’s good for hangovers] for you. You should wash up before you eat.”

Nari tried standing up, but her legs were too weak to carry her. Taehyung took off her undergarments and placed her in the tub. Nari crossed her arms on her chest in embarrassment. “It’s fine, I’ll help you wash up,” Taehyung insisted. Nari kept quiet yet she was still uncomfortable letting Taehyung bathe her. After drying up he gave her undergarments and a oversized tshirt he found in her closet.

He picked her up bridal style putting her in a seat at the dining table with the bowl of soup infront of her. She drank her soup slowly feeling the heat fill her inside.  Her body was cold and empty. Taehyung sat in the chair infront of her watching her eat. She quietly finished and sooner became uncomfortable with Taehyung’s piercing gaze. She had no idea what to say.

He was basically a stranger from the bar a couple of days ago. A queesy feeling was tangled in her stomach. “How much did I drink,” she managed to ask.

“A lot.” Taehyung brought his gaze to the ground and sighed. “Jimin was here last night.”

Nari’s eyes widened, “what did he tell you?”

“Nothing much, just claiming that he was still your boyfriend.” Taehyung brought his gaze to her eyes. “Do you miss him?”

Nari thought back to the times where Jimin and her were happy and on good terms. Remembering his smile cheered her up making her let out a sly grin.

“You miss him don’t you,” Taehyung said in a more serious tone. Nari snapped back to reality noticing his face nearing hers. “No, I don’t miss him,” she said shaking her head flustered.

Taehyung’s lips and Nari’s lips were nearly a centimeter apart. Fighting his instincts he smiled which turned into a chuckle. Nari gave an agitated look. She knew he was teasing her. Taehyung’s phone started to ring. “Oh hey!” Nari watched him talking to whoever was on the phone. She noticed that he kept looking at her with a worried look. “Ok, I’ll be there.” Taehyung ended the call. He and Nari exchanged glances again. “Call me if you need me. I already added my number on your phone. I should be heading out now.” Taehyung got up from his seat and headed towards the door. Nari sat there staring at her empty bowl of soup.

Taehyung entered a cafe scanning for his friend. “Jungkook-ah,” Taehyung said sitting in front of him.

“Hyung! How’s it going? Here I got you an espresso.” Jungkook was smiling with excitement.

“Thanks! Why did you call me in the morning?”

“You are never home. You’re always hunting girls.”

“Pshh not always.”

Jungkook crossed his arms, “I bet you just came from a girl’s house.”

“Yeah,” Taehyung sighed, “I think she may be the one.” His hands cupped his face as his elbows rested on the table.

“What are you talking about?”

“Her scent was so unique and addicting.” Taehyung couldn’t stop grinning.

“Hyung, you know you can’t fall in love with a human. You’re a vampire,” Jungkook said concerned.

“I know.”

“Well it sounds like your falling for her. How long have you been seeing her?”

“Hmm, two days ago we met at the bar.”

“Have you been to her house?”

“Yeah I slept over there last night.” Jungkook’s face became red. “Why are you jealous,” Taehyung chuckled.

“Remember when Namjoon had an affair with a human? How did that turnout?”

“He had it hard on him.”

“He is still shaken and broken inside. I don’t want that to happen to you. I care for you!” Jungkook held on to Taehyung’s shoulders giving him a worried look.

“Don’t worry it’s nothing like that. I’ll just treat myself for a little bit,” he said brushing off Jungkook’s grip. “Jungkook, how’s your hunting been going?”

“Fine,” Jungkook replied in hesitation.

“Come to the bar with me tonight. There are many girls there.”

“Sure it’s a date!”

“What?”

“Nothing.”

Taehyung’s phone began buzzing. He looked down realizing it was Nari, which made his face brighten up. “Hey, I thought you would never call.” Jungkook’s eyes widened in curiosity and in anger. “Hello?” Taehyung gave an confused expression. He heard a blur of a man’s voice and a girl’s whimper. Taehyung ended the call and looked back at Jungkook, “Nari is in trouble! I’ve gotta go. Meet me at 7 at the bar.”

“Nari? Who’s Nari?”

Taehyung left the cafe quickly and ran towards Nari’s house. Running down the street, he searched through all the turns and corners. She couldn’t have gone far. He heard a loud cry so he tried locating where it was coming from. Looking both sides he found Nari against a wall and Jimin hovering over her. Running towards them he gave Jimin a good punch in the face.

“Oh it’s you,” Jimin said smirking.

“Don’t touch her.” It was obvious that Taehyung was out of breath.

“Taehyung-ah.”

Taehyung brought is gaze upon Nari who looked shaken. “Fight me!” Jimin got back up from the ground walking towards Taehyung with his chest up. “I don’t fight little boys like you.”

“Making fun of my height, that’s it you’re dead!” Jimin tried to throw a punch but instead Taehyung grasped his arm before it touched his face and kicked him in his crotch. Nari stood there in shock and stared at Jimin wincing in pain.

Taehyung grabbed her arm and pulled her back her apartment. “You okay? You’re not hurt anywhere? What did he do to you? Are you sure you’re not hurt?” Taehyung began panicking. “I’m fine, I just went to the convenience store to get some beer,” Nari held out the white plastic bag which was in her other hand. Taehyung took the bag to put the six pack in the fridge. Nari walked to the couch and sat. Taehyung stared at her fragile body.

She is like a rose petal. Fragrant, but prone to breaking apart. Jimin is just a thorn. I’m like the florist that nurtures her. Her skin glimmers like a full moon’s light setting on the ocean.

Taehyung sat on the other side of the sofa. The two didn’t speak or make eye contact giving out the awkward atmosphere again. Taehyung stretched his arms out and laid his head on Nari’s lap. “I’m tired,” he said pouting. Nari chuckled as she watched Taehyung closed his eyes. She combed her fingers through his tousled chocolate brown hair. Watching him sleep made her heart flutter.

Am I falling for him?

[hgfstreamchats]

Atlantis

*flop* Night human, hello! Hello I'm just beat I know the feeling. ...And it might be impeccable timing! Looks like the site is down. Awwwww, no We could... watch a movie instead? Did I somehow manage not to miss anything? A movie sounds excellent. Any suggestions? Hmmmmmmmmmmm let me check my list How about... Atlantis? Works for me! I have no objection.

Apparently we are watching Jeepers Creepers, and we are going to like it. Hmmm. Hmm, it's opening just fine in another tab. Here, try this instead https://www.watchcartoononline.io/atlantis-the-lost-empire

Atlantis: The Lost Empire | Watch cartoons online, Watch anime online, English dub anime Watch Atlantis: The Lost Empire online free with HQ / high quailty. Stream movie Atlantis: The Lost Empire.A large tidal wave triggered by a distant explosion threatens

watchcartoononline.io

Oh, watchcartoononline, why don't I ever refer to you first? Just, uh, ignore the ads. I forget they're there, having blocked the hell out of them long ago There we go! Beautiful! The end. That is not really a warning. hello! Hello! Whoop, glowy eyes of foreboding! And then they drowned. Shoosh. Uranium! Either that, or we forgot another relic on Earth. Earth is like a gosh-darn magnet for anything you carelessly shoot into space for some reason It may be due to Unicron being the core. He attracts chaos. Is that a shrine probably Oh my gosh Oh my gosh he's like Linguistics Mulder He does not realize this is always a setup to being murdered. At least he's being delightful about sending Milo off to almost-certain doom They really go all out on every facial expression. They do! I do not trust this weird human. omg kity This little human's adorable. Does he have a match in his mouth Hello main villain, probably That's not a trustworthy chin. No indeed. Exactly. Why was he crossing his digits behind his back? Oh my god what .... Apparently Milo's body belongs to the crew and they'd like to make that clear right off the bat. It's like everyone on this ship stopped giving even a single shit. Serpents do not have limbs. Not with THAT attitude, they don't She taunted Murphy. Well, that man is dead. And now they all die. oh, yeah, this movie has an incredible body count Excellent. Fun! This thing sure is... crabby. Good to get the cannon fodder out of the way early. That way no one misses them. yeah, it's really put them in a pinch Something something... shell? How fortunate they are that the air is still breathable down there. That's nothing, don't you remember Treasure Planet Treasure Planet had 'space technology' as a cheat. hahahha Awwww. dude, ASK qué es esto Wheeljack! Red! Hello, hello same ... Fireflies. Of course. Uh Oh What about, uh Their explosives And then they died. Heh. i like this guy Well Convenient power in the short term, but overuse will give you cancer. uhhh Shhh, shhh, that's definitely how language works. The surface dwellers also introduce new viruses into the local population. why is that human magnus Called it We don't trust his chin. I'm pretty sure that's going to turn out to be an enormous slur on Magnus GOOD Peaceful explorers, with lots of explosives I do not like the king's voice. Does this story really require the little ratman? heh. that's a man???? Who wouldn't want a story with a bizarre earth-fetishist rat-man Without the ratman, who else would grind in the obnoxiousness? i feel like my boy the explosives guy could give us everything beepbeep How does the linguist fail at pronouncing a name given to him? i think humans have a tongue swelling thing when they see someone pretty Less Ratman and Dr. Touches, more explosive human. more explosions general bring on the booms A convenient history of Atlantis. And then he died of the bends. Tragic. Shoosh, the bends don't exist, just like there's magically fresh air down here oh frag Whoop damn Curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal, Magnus. Indeed I'm tellin' ya, the mech's gonna turn OH a BIG STATUE Or maybe, uh literally in his head His eyes DO look kinda crystally yeah so do mine Well, that looks safe ...Oh. It's because he looked This is probably not a good sign. Ohhhhhh my This is probably fine. Huh. It was fine. ALSO probably fine W What flowers why Smoke up what air they have left. That's helpful. Nobody we knew I love explosives human. How are they planning on getting back to the surface? OH HEY Oh great there goes alpha trion He sounds like Sentinel. I dislike it. He got that story out pretty smoothly for someone half a minute from death. He died on purpose, to get out of dealing with this mess. explosives guy is high all day every day Truly your spirit human. i love him They just so happened to bring tiny planes with them. Just in case. apparently! You never know when you're going to need tiny planes under the ocean. HA ohhh brutal How is she alive after that She did not survive that fall. damn magnus hahahaah his face oh scrap hahahah wow Nice wow Here comes Magnus! now magnus can't talk scrap about me bein' on crystals Hah! And they flood Atlantis with lava. Perfect. Well then They have known each other for about two hours. But it felt like three. ha GIVE HIM A HUG. Now wash that hand. That hand will never be clean. oof seaspray used to crack my spinal strut over his leg if i whined about it enough Nice. "But we WON'T say that, because it's SECRET" how did humans put magnus and me in this so well Dumb luck. There's apparently an awful sequel. technically it's actually three episodes to a tv show that got canned before it made it to air, and they thought they'd flog it direct to video Can we go about our lives, without suffering through the awful sequel? technically it's actually three episodes to a tv show that got canned before it made it to air, and they thought they'd flog it direct to video Can we go about our lives, without suffering through the awful sequel? Or will knowing it is out there haunt us relentlessly? uho h I'm up for it if you folks are. Welllllllll... Sure, I have not been tormented enough. Sure, why not watch something to viciously mock It probably is not worse than the pig sequels. Nothing could be worse than the pig sequels. Gotta run, Red. Thanks for the party Always a pleasure! See you! Behold! Atlantis on a tenth of the budget And then they died. Remember those beautiful shots from the first movie? None of that here! Lava whales. Lava whales. Of course. So it heals rock, too? I should know better than to ask why, and yet, it is the only question. Wasn't that thing... bigger? You probably aren't. Oh, it's crying His rock looks upset at what his city has become. their smiles look unnatural She looks weird OH JOY. A PET MASCOT The lava tubes. And a giant crab. No. Not allowed. Ew. I hate their relationship. All the food is just, like. Bowls of dyed pasta. You live in Atlantis, you eat noodles. Forever. Oh, Kida, what have they done to you? That's ridiculous They live UNDER THE OCEAN Surely they're familiar with, like, swimming, floating, drowning Yes, make sure you bring the animal with you. Where would they be without their mascot Perhaps less drowning. The real kraken is that grim faced weirdo. Gettin' a little Shadow Over Innsmouth here ewwww, don't touch it t's like watching animatronics Why do they even have an inn if they hate visitors so much what's with her FACE . . . She cannot actually focus on anyone. Will-o-wisps? Heh Rat-man's grimace will follow you to your dreams I despise everything about Rat-man. W...what Maybe he just has one of the magic life-extending crystals I hate that Rat-man is contributing more than he ever did in the good movie. He should never move the plot forward. and yet, he is "Ha, now you can't complain that he's useless!" I will complain regardless. Kray-ken. It like... patted him gosh, maybe he's not the one in charge here I never thought a story about a tentacle monster could be so unappealing. Stop moving the plot forward, Rat-man! How dare he contribute? And they crush their friend with roof debris. Gasp. Uh... ... Ominous. I thought there was going to be a twist where it was a tiny tentacle monster they do not get paid enough for this Also I feel like nothing was really... explained Of course it wasn't. Milo who showed up three weeks ago knows more than her, of course. Are they just planning on investigating nonsense around the world? Why not use the magic healing crysta on him Too much work. gosh it's ALMOST like the coyotes are MADE OF SAND, animated by some magic force Jinkies! ... This bit is older than I am. Oh, Kida... So there's no theft in Atlantis, huh Had not been invented yet. Well, HE'S evil Because you know the writers of this nonsense wanted to be timeline accurate. Him? No! Every problem is going to have a spooky old man. I keep expecting to see Wile E Coyote and the roadrunner in this landscape This seems offensive to someone. You think? I can't get past how weird everyone looks I mean, Rat-man took a lateral move, but still Gosh, who's surprised Wait, did Rat-man just contribute to the plot again More than old man Kakashi. Because surely he won't just go to the cave and steal everything. Rat-man's carrying the plot and I'm not okay with that. ... oh wow. He's the most important character in this story It's, like, all about his dirt-eating Oh so it's a big museum The adventures of Rat-man and friends. wow his voice will just never stop cracking, will it Stop touching each other. And then he killed them. WOW who would have GUESSED Of course we have to have silly implausible knockout gas. Why even bother tying them up? Just kill them while they are unconscious. Likes gloating? Please, please kill them while they're unconscious. I don't like Milo's little pantaloons or shapely calves. Someone had to draw them. Guess SOMEbody's about to get sandblasted But for the pot they broke, they must die. Don't do it, Kakashi! Tell me your secret. "well if I told you it wouldn't be a secret, would it" "We love you, old man Jicama." ... Did Odin broke into his house. Did Odin break into this guy's I mean I sthis where theis is going What even is this premise? I mean I guess he can have it None of this could have less to do with anything. Oh dude you are WAY off they wanted to do a multi-season tv show like this ...Or, uh. Maybe not Then he is simply an insane man who is good at training birds. Dead. Pffffff . . . . . . . "The cum filling?" ...What I also heard that. And again, ratman is essential to the plot. ....Ewwwwww, he dressed her I think he is very confused abou this mythos, also I feel concussed. ...Did anyone else just see the explosives human disassociate out of his body? They've all been doing that The image bleed has been very prevalent. I haven't seen it get quite as bad as that. Uh... huh. So they're like boiling the ocean That's a little grim Rest in peace, fishermen. Or not. Rejoin the world, just in time to participate in a World War. Excellent plan. Wait there's a child? And contract polio. Was she like born DURING the thousands of years under the sea? Not quite as bad as the pig sequel, but still too reliant on the ratman. well that was... underwhelming That was wretched. I'm on the cusp of powering down, but thank you all for coming and enduring this. Thank you for hosting this terrible assortment of bad ideas. Well. It's what I do! Good night! Thanks for the stream. Good night! Good night! Thanks for the stream. Good night! Thank *you* for the movie suggestion, night human!