#and that's the max punishment

[darlingshane]

Jon Bernthal as Frank Castle THE PUNISHER | 2.01

[chaoticmiserablelover]

How some straight men in classic literature act: women are smart and beautiful, but they seem so out of reach. 

Anyway, here is my best friend. He is so beautiful. He is the one person I can trust. We might have kissed a few times in this novel, like all good friends do. Did I mention how beautiful he is in this feminine way? It takes my breath away.

[fumifooms]

Chilchuck analysis speedrun: As a hardworking half-foot who grew up poor and discriminated against and had his gullibility taken advantage of multiple times in his early adventuring days, Chilchuck thinks optimism is a dangerous flaw. He’s stressed and strict all the time because his job is noticing details like traps that could get everyone killed before anyone knows it, he takes the lives of everyone to be on his shoulders, and with the way he speaks about it that probably partly reflects how he felt about taking it upon himself to provide for his family too. His life’s always been pretty centered around work and has become even moreso now that his wife left and everyone is independent, and due to past events he’s very iffy with bonding with coworkers. He thinks feelings and job are a disaster mix. Like with his wife or with parties hiring him as sacrifice, being open or having good faith is vulnerability which can get you hurt, so he processes and shows all his stress as anger instead of worry. Doing strict dieting probably isn’t helping the irritability what with hunger, and on top of being a hunger suppressant alcohol might be the main stress reliever he has.

His grey hairs are so earned

[stubz]

"Human Kim! Wait!"

"Sorry Op! Can't talk! Date night with Fenrir!"

"But Kim! Your jacket!" but it was too late. The human was already out of earshot.

Oh well they thought, I can just stop by their room tomorrow and return it.

*the next day*

"Hey Kim, you left your jacket in the storage room yesterday. I'm heading to your room to give it to you."

"Oh thanks Op," she winced as she heard the human go into a coughing fit. "I'll come down and get it." she heard rustling.

"Are you in bed?"

"Yeah but it's fine. 'ust a cold." oh so she's just cold, Op thought.

.

"T'anks Op. I was wondering where 'is was."

"What happened to you??" the human looked 2 shades paler, was shivering in her hoodie and was dripping slime from her nose.

"I have the cold...I'm sick."

"But yesterday you help carried 20 pound storage containers, clean the whole east section of the storage unit and sprinted max speed to get ready for your date."

"Yeah, cause I told my body to suck it up."

"...you told your body to what?"

"I knew I was getting sick on Monday but 'is week was gonna be busy so I 'old my body to power through and suck it up. You can be sick on the weekend not Friday though cause we've been waiting all month for 'is date!" the human nodded to herself.

"Humans can do that?!"

" 'hose determined enough can."

"But is this safe? Healthy?"

"No idea but I couldn't miss work cause we're short on staff. Plus 'is gives me guilt points on captin."

"Okay change of plans. I'm staying here and making you some food and then you are going back to bed."

"Yay!"

"And I'm giving captain a heads up that your probably staying home on Monday."

"Probably th' smart thing to do."

[overtake]

A random scene from my Maxiel hockey au just because

“Why the fuck does this team give us perfectly identical sweatshirts? How am I ever meant to find mine?” Daniel asks, pawing through the clothes piled precariously on one of the barstools.

“It’ll probably be the one with your number on it,” Max says drily. “And teams tend to have matching clothing.”

Daniel looks up from his careful searching and tosses Max the finger. “Just for that, I’m wearing yours.”

Max’s hoodie is technically the same size as Daniel’s because Daniel prefers to size up, but it’s stretched out around the shoulders in a way Daniel’s isn’t. There’s a small stain by the left cuff whereas Daniel keeps his pristine. Most notably, there’s a 33 over the left chest instead of a single digit. It feels more lived-in and comfortable than Daniel’s, even though Daniel probably wears his jumpers twice as often as Max does.

He pops his head of the neckline and adjusts the strings. “Alright. I’m set. Let’s go.”

Max is paused with his keys in hand, mouth slightly parted and eyes burning holes into the number screenprinted on the fabric.

“You can’t get mad. I told you I was taking it,” Daniel says, even though Max doesn’t seem upset. Daniel can’t quite identify the expression crossing his face, but it’s definitely not annoyance.

“Don’t spill anything on it,” Max finally says.

Daniel catches up to him at the door and sticks the stained arm in Max’s face. “Don’t worry. You took care of that first.”

Max shoves his arm away, rolling his eyes playfully. “I’m not driving you anymore. You can hobble to the rink.”

Daniel switches positions to wrap his upper body around Max’s broad back, clasp his hands around Max’s neck, and jerk one leg up as if he’s about to jump for a piggy-back ride. Max elbows him off, giggling and pink-cheeked.

“Fine, I suppose I can give you a ride, but I’m not buying your tea,” Max warns. He undercuts his threatening words by instinctively holding Daniel’s hip, pale fingers pressed into plush fabric and waiting in case Daniel’s ankle gives out. Daniel has been successfully walking with no problems for a full week now, but Max is always hovering and holding.

“But I’m cold,” Daniel pouts, dramatically sticking out his lower lip. He’s just being annoying, but a gust of chilly air actually hits as he says it. Daniel shivers, pulling the jumper tight over his hands and moving closer to Max to try and leech some of his body heat. “I need this. Respect those of us from hot countries who played in hot states for ages.”

Max laughs, slinging an arm around Daniel’s back and tugging him into a mocking hug. “Poor Daniel. You only have to play in the NHL for the most iconic team in the craziest hockey city. Your life is very hard because it’s sometimes below zero and I don’t buy you tea.”

Daniel pulls his hands upward and dramatically rubs them together, then huddles into Max and presses his clasped hands between their chests. He doesn’t care if the hug is teasing. He’s genuinely fucking cold.

“You’re not allowed to be mean to me. I’m still injured.” He pokes out his healed ankle and lightly kicks Max’s leg with it. Max is in shorts, exposing fuzzy, muscled calves to Canadian January because he’s batshit insane.

“I’m hugging you,” Max says, rubbing his free hand up and down Daniel’s back. “I am very nice.”

Daniel presses his face into Max’s shoulder, just for a second. “Yeah. You’re not too bad, I guess.”

Shortly into their drive, Max detours, parallel parks, and comes back with a massive tea and crinkly brown bag.

“Their tea is shit and the donut is vegan,” Max says. His furrowed brow is aiming for admonishing, but the tugged edges of his mouth and dramatic tone give him away. “That’s your punishment.”

He still accepts the torn pieces of donut Daniel presses to his pink mouth and licks off the crumbs that decorate the sweet freckle on his upper lip.

“Wait. You have —” Daniel covers his thumb with the blue fabric of Max’s sweater and wipes one last sprinkle away as Max pulls into a parking space.

Max catches Daniel’s wrist before he can pull it back to his own body. He stares Daniel down with big eyes and long lashes and plucks the sprinkle where it’s caught on the ribbed cuffs. Max places one hand on Daniel’s chin and pulls down his lower lip, then places the sprinkle into Daniel’s salivating mouth.

“Don’t waste food.”

Max’s hands linger for one heated second before he drops them to turn off the ignition. Daniel tries to calm the thud of his straining heart, breathing in then out in an attempt to regain some normalcy.

He takes long enough that Max knocks on his passenger-side window, peering in and making little glasses over his eyes and waving all goofy, like nothing had just happened.

He eventually pulls open Daniel’s car door for him, gesturing out to the grey pavement. “Are you planning on showing up to practice today?” he teases.

Daniel recovers enough to slide out, though not gracefully, and heads into the rink to get chirped into oblivion over the 33 that feels throbbing and alive over his still-racing heart.

[castlesprincess]

No thoughts head empty

[supermaks]

‘Maxplaining’ is very cute and funny but sometimes it makes me so fucking sad

[lifeisstrange-incorrectquotes]

Max: *watching the Emoji Movie* Kate, I think she's had enough...

Kate: Max, Vicky told me it took 2 hours to redye her hair. Chloe needs to learn what happens when she messes with my Vivi.

Max: *looks at Chloe who's tied to a chair Clockwork Orange style, whimpering* This must be Kate’s 1984 phase...

[f1-obsessed333]

[tinseltownie]

A weird b-plot of this F1 season has been Max Verstappen receiving random disciplinary penalties from various adults in his life. The sim racing ban, the bed time and now the community service???????

[angelgalchicha]

3/3

Happy New Years from Frank and Max <3

[donewiththisshitplsstop]

Are you guys treating yuki the same way you treated max when he used the same ableist slur. Or are you just racist?

[californiaboytoybilly]

the sibling dynamic we deserved between billy and max

[castle-rook]

Me when I lie

[ineffablejaymee]

me, every single time i need to feel something

[cry-ptidd]

the major in hell watching alucard come back more powerful than ever 30 years after his ‘defeat’