#and the eternal division he seems to want to make between him as an artist and him as the business person except | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

flickeringart · 3 years

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Neptune aspecting Mercury and Venus

(Continuation of my post “Neptune aspecting the Sun and Moon”)

Mercury aspecting Neptune

Mercury is representative of deductive reasoning, of communication and learning, of exchange of information and social interaction. Mercury is essentially representative of the mental faculties, the ability to draw conclusions based on the gathering of information. Mercury represents the intellect, the most commonly applied tool for understanding and navigating the world around the self. It’s the tool that makes connections, that defines and discriminates. The intellect is a divisive mechanism that breaks things down and distinguishes every little part to discover its function and purpose within the whole.

Mercury aspecting Neptune often lends itself to a very creative mind and an ability to articulate and communicate nuances. It also seems to lend itself to a vivid imagination – an ability to paint a picture with words or portray an archetypal energy through mimicry and acting. The conjunction is the most intense of the aspects and the benefits as well as the debilitations are felt more acutely. While Mercury-Neptune has the ability to “enchant” with words and easily navigate the world of imagery and fairytales, the real world void of magic can be less easy to navigate. Taylor Swift has the conjunction and she’s a great example of someone who is a storyteller through songwriting. She essentially takes the interactions of her everyday life and turns it into magic – something that is universal and appeals to people world wide. Music has the ability to glamorize the most dull and ordinary and elevate it to new heights. There’s a might to music and it speaks to people on the feeling level. Music, movies and theater for that matter have the goal to affect people, to mirror their inner life and strike a note on some level of the psyche. Mercury-Neptune comes with the risk of being easily affected by words and a tendency to read into things more than necessary. Sometimes the meaning of another person’s words can be distorted and made to fit the person’s own preferred narrative. This is a huge problem, especially for the conjunction - sometimes words that actually carry weight can be made out to mean anything. Furthermore, in overlooking the concrete – that which is spelled out loud and clear, there door is wide open to make mistakes and blunders when tending to details, and in real life this can have dire consequences. Reading too much into things or not reading enough into things seems to be the problem. Neptune refines whatever planet it touches and this can make for a real ability to work with subtleties, but the more subtle something is, the less dense and concrete it is. The more sensitive the instrument, the more susceptible it is to suggestion and manipulation. Fantasy and imagination is inextricably merged with the intellect with this aspect.

The trine and the sextile aspects from Neptune to Mercury similarly lends themselves to a feeling for subtlety when communicating and thinking. The trine is more of a natural modus operandi while the sextile is more of a skill that can be used and activated through conscious cooperation. Mercury-Neptune can potentially cause a propensity for lying, not because of a need for a control but because of a natural tendency to distort information. This is as true for the conjunction as the trine, while the sextile might take some deliberation. The tendency to convey information in the most romanticized and creative fashion might border on lying because it leaves people with no grasp of the cold and hard facts. Mercury-Neptune is not good with the plain, cut and dry message transferring – these people thinks in images and imbue everything they convey with a touch of story-telling.

The square from Neptune to Mercury, seems to make the native very serious in creative pursuits. There’s effort and strain that is required because of conflict felt between the intellect and the vault of dreams and fantasy. Usually, the native displays criticism of their work and is skeptically inclined toward their own influence or the value of their own artistic pursuits. Amy Winehouse had the square in her chart and she was quite hard on herself although the public loved her. Even in people who aren’t pursuing an artistic path, the Mercury –Neptune square will cause the person to undervalue any talents and dreams that they have, yet be pressed to develop and fulfill them. David Bowie is also a great example of this type of person – on the one hand there’s nebulousness and chaotic creativity, on the one hand there’s analyzing and mental discernment that is unforgiving. Donald Trump also has the square, quite the business man, yet he’s not someone who is able to stick to the purely factual– he manufactures his own story, his own narrative that people, to a large extent, wants to buy. He speaks to the masses and moves them emotionally, some say he’s profoundly stupid, some says his wits are underestimated. This is typical of the square, there’s tension between the two planets and one cannot take credit for both ends. Either one sacrifices Mercury and looks mad and deranged, or one sacrifices Neptune and appears overly critical and rational – even cold and unfeeling.

The opposition aspect is in turn linked to extremism – the native must try to balance intellectual discernment with emotional receptivity. Too much of one thing will be to the detriment of the other. While the square produces conflict and tension, the opposition can give the ability to abandon one planet in favor of the other. Yoko Ono has this aspect and she has obviously been a big advocate of peace and love (Neptune), sometimes to the detriment of rhyme and reason. She has suggested that “direct communication” is the only way to true communication, but of course, this is only possible in the womb, if even then. The great gift of the opposition is the ability to abandon reason, to experience everything and hold onto nothing, to not label and impose judgment. However, it’s not difficult to see the consequences for this sacrifice.

(Buy products with my art)

Venus aspecting Neptune

Venus is representative of love and beauty, of femininity and sociability. The planet is linked to that which is of value, worthy of display and admiration. It also has something to do with preferences, style and talent. Venus is the one attracting Mars, that instigates desire, that draws him in. That which instigates our desire is powerful because it dictates action. Venus has a lot to do with money because it’s a marker and a measure of value – and people want to have as much as possible of it in order to be comfortable and socially desirable. Venus also has to do with partnership and marriage, and in order to catch someone’s eye, one has to be beautiful and appealing.

Neptune conjunct Venus is truly the height of love. While Venus is more personal and more social in nature, Neptune is the collective urge for redemption, the pull to touch something sacred. Neptune in us wants it all, the magic of enchantment that belongs to fairytales. Ordinary human love, which is more about feeling esteemed within a social context and desired for specific qualities, is not cutting it. With these planets conjunct, the person craves the total submerging with the one and only beloved in one’s heart and in other people’s hearts. Neptunian love is based on the mutual longing for something eternally blissful, the garden of Eden, the ultimate escape. This longing exist in all human beings to a larger or lesser extent, but it certainly unifies us and in some ways confirm our basic vulnerability and need for redemption. When Neptune and Venus are conjunct it would seem as if the person is very compassionate and understanding of people’s hearts. No doubt one can be very soothing and able to see the beloved one in all people one meets, which can be wonderful but also overwhelming and exhausting. The person is certainly capable of being accepting of all people, even to the point of allowing things that shouldn’t be allowed. Disillusionment can dawn brutally on these types since they have strong investment in the pure and untainted love that can only be kept alive in fantasy. These planets aspecting each other is a setup for being in love with love. Love for these types might not be about a specific person, they might seek out someone for their ability to mirror them. In other words, it would be difficult to love a person for their individuality because one would seek out someone with enough receptivity and mutability in order to find something of oneself in the other. Of course, this seems to be the nature of love despite Venus aspecting Neptune or not. We only ever fall in love with ourselves, although we’re unconscious of the fact. The only reason we’re ever drawn to someone is because we see something of ourselves in them. For people with Venus-Neptune contacts this phenomenon is taken to new heights. Liking and being fond of something yet knowing that that person or thing is different from oneself is entirely different from feeling a sense of union and yearning that is the oceanic deity calling a person home. With Neptune, the love object is the answer to all prayers and the remedy for all one’s troubles and pains. This is of course never quite true and the disappointment that follows upon the clearing of the intoxicating mist can be very scary and deeply depressing. Personal love, marriage and commitment might be idealized to the point of absurdity.

The trine and the sextile aspects are less intense compared to the conjunction, but they similarly denote a refined taste and a appreciation of artistry and music – anything that touches people’s souls inexplicably and profoundly. Typically, all Venus-Neptune aspects indicate a need to be loved unconditionally and to love unconditionally. Both of these harmonious aspects denote a very compassionate nature and a tendency to idealize and glamourize love. One is naturally very generous with one’s outpouring of affection, even when one’s own heart is broken. The trine indicates that the person is innately and naturally mirroring other people’s beauty. Escapism and distortion of reality is one’s way of being, it is not an acquired skill but rather something that’s a given. It’s probably easy to over-indulge in pleasure in order to escape the dreary everyday existence. In fact, when things get too hard, this is exactly what this type is likely to do. The sextile is more of a skill that is available for use. In other words, one is able to stimulate a bit of Neptune’s magic and universality in one’s style of expressing love – adding a bit of glamour, unattainability and fantasy in the mix. Conscious cooperation is required though, it’s not as if the sextile is going to cause over-indulgence as soon as one lets go of inhibitions.

The square aspect typically brings doubt and friction, when Neptune and Venus are involved, the conflict is between one’s personal value(s) and the recognition of oneness. Usually, the ugly side of Neptune comes out more readily. One wants to attain something special and magical but since one is not attuned enough or certain of one’s own preferences and values neither planet gets fulfilled or satisfied. Kim Kardashian has this square and she is never quite satisfied with her appearance (Venus), which is why she spends to much time perfecting it. She wants so badly to embody the ideal (Neptune) yet can’t seem to close the gap between her own personal look and the otherworldly refinement that Neptune represents. What ends up happening is that she becomes too artificial, some would even call her grotesque – she simply can’t find peace with imperfection – everything has to be sweet and pretty to the point that the coin flips and everything turns ugly. Although Neptune is usually associated with spirituality and the beauty of the divine, it is also associated with dissolution and disintegration – which often manifests as madness. Kim Kardashian has many times been rude or downright aggressive because of her vanity and venusian pride. Madonna also has this square and she certainly falls in the category of people who care enormously about their appearance, being attractive and young even up until old age. Venus is the goddess of youth and beauty and Neptune holds the promise of redemption through the planet(s) that it aspects. It’s easy to see how this square relationship between the planets could run amok. If youth is the gate to heaven, one would be willing to go very far in order to not let the imperfections stop heaven from becoming a reality. When it comes to love and relationships there’s inevitability of disappointment and uncertainty – one tends to look for the perfect partner yet no one can be it all in terms of fulfilling the dream because the standards are set too high. On the flip side, the standards can also be too low, because of the Neptunian tendency is to either be unrealistically idealistic or stubbornly accepting and passive in destructive situations.

The opposition aspect doesn’t typically bring out the obsession with perfect love and beauty. It makes the individual aware that love, in it’s selfish guise of wanting another person or object tied to the self in some way because of good looks and style, is antithetical to universal love. In a sense, personal love must be sacrificed for communion with the source of life, that which many people call God – or, God must be sacrificed for ordinary human seduction, value and pleasure. These are the people who are only looking to touch the source of life through love and union, nothing more. They’re not looking to simple hedonistic pleasures or superficial adornments. If they do, they’re doing it at the detriment of true compassion and communion with all of life. George Harrison had this opposition in his chart and so had Bob Marley. Both were musicians, both used drugs and both had a deep urge for spirituality. Both emphasized the importance of the connection with God and pointed out the triviality of worldly matters. Venus, is to an extent, quite earthy and materialistic. She cares about being nice, looking nice and behaving in a way that causes others to admire her. It seems like Harrison lost his first marriage because of incessant drug use and infidelities. Neptune is boundless and is everywhere and anywhere – there was no way Venus, ruling marriage and social contracts, could conquer the pull of the promise of ecstatic union. With the opposition, either special partnership/marriage or God is the pursuit, neither can exists in conjunction with the other.

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zamblam · 3 years

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Background

Sasori and Deidara first met when Deidara was forcefully recruited into Akatsuki after being defeated by Itachi. Sasori needed a new partner after his previous partner, Orochimaru, defected from Akatsuki. Sasori commented on how Deidara seemed like someone who would die young. Sasori and Deidara would work together for about three years and nothing is really known about this time spent together. Both Sasori and Deidara consider themselves artists, though their artistic philosophies differed drastically. Sasori believed art was meant to last for an eternity for posterity and to leave something for the future. Deidara believed art was meant to last only for a moment, so that the artist can seek to create even greater art and even greater stimulation. These philosophies are reflected in their fighting techniques as Deidara uses detonating clay to explode enemies and Sasori uses puppets and even made his own body into a puppet so as to achieve immortality. Ironically Sasori prefers to end fights quickly and hates to keep people waiting, whereas Deidara likes to take his time with an opponent. This leads to frequent bickering between the two of them, even if they are being confronted by enemies. Deidara actually seems to respect Sasori’s art and his exceptional knowledge of it, referring to him as “Sasori no Danna” which means Master Sasori (in the English Anime it is translated as “Sasori my man”). Sasori has no respect for Deidara’s art, calling it a cheap pyrotechnics display and referring to him as a brat. Sasori often ends their arguments with threats to kill Deidara. In spite of threats to kill Deidara, Sasori often made efforts to protect him and often scolded him for not being more prepared in battle. Deidara seemed to enjoy getting an angry response out of his usually emotionless partner.

Kazekage Rescue Arc

Sasori and Deidara traveled towards Sunagakure, in which Sasori voiced concerns if Deidara was prepared enough to fight Gaara. Deidara assured Sasori that he brought his c3 clay just in case. They managed to infiltrate Sunagakure easily thanks to Sasori’s brainwashed ally Yura. Deidara makes a clay bird and asked what Sasori thought of his sculpture. Sasori replied by telling him not to keep him waiting. Deidara simply encouraged Sasori to watch the fight and enjoy the show. Though Deidara’s arms was destroyed in the fight, he managed to defeat Gaara and smiled at the thought of how angry Sasori would be for taking so long. They quickly left Sunagakure, but were confronted by Gaara’s brother Kankuro. After seeing Kankuro was a puppet master like himself, Sasori encouraged Deidara to go on ahead. Deidara smiled and confidently thought of how easily Sasori would defeat him. Kankuro attempted to attack Deidara before his departure, but Sasori quickly stopped the attack. Sasori defeated Kankuro and managed to catch up to Deidara, who seemed amused that Sasori was keeping him waiting for a change. They arrived at the Akatsuki headquarters and helped to seal the One Tailed Shukaku. They stayed behind to confront the team of ninjas that came to save Gaara. Deidara and Sasori get into an argument over who should fight Naruto. Sasori wanted to fight him so as to meet the quota of one jinchuriki each. Deidara wanted to fight him as he saw him as the perfect “canvas” for his art. This led to an argument about art, that didn’t stop even when Naruto, the person they were supposed to capture and were arguing about in the first place, attempted to attack them. Deidara created a clay bird and took off with Gaara’s body against Sasori’s wishes, to which Naruto and Kakashi followed. Sasori battled Chiyo and Sakura but was ultimately killed, though not before he informed them about a spy in among Orochimaru’s followers, revealing a grudge he held against his former partner. Meanwhile Deidara lost his other arm fighting Kakashi, and thought about how Sasori would be mad at him for not thinking ahead more carefully. Deidara hid as Chiyo and Sakura met up with Kakashi and Naruto. Shocked that Sasori was defeated, Deidara spoke to Sasori in his mind claiming “you relied too much on that puppet body of yours, even though it revealed your weak spot. Still it was a death worthy of an artist.” Deidara was then confronted by Team Guy, but managed to escape by faking his suicide by explosion.

Itachi Pursuit Arc

Now partnered with Tobi, Deidara learns of former Akatsuki member Orochimaru’s death. Deidara was seriously angered by this having wanted to kill Orochimaru in honor of Sasori. Sasori hated Orochimaru for betraying him and Akatsuki. Deidara decides the next best thing is to defeat Orochimaru’s killer Sasuke. Deidara becomes increasingly angry as Sasuke overcame each and every piece of art he threw at him, including his c4 Garuda which he was planning to use to kill Itachi. He ultimately uses his c0 “Ultimate Art”, which kills him in a massive suicide bombing but ultimately fails to kill Sasuke.

Shinobi World War Arc

Kabuto resurrects Sasori and Deidara for his army in the Fourth Shinobi War. He assigned them to the Surprise Attack and Diversion Platoon. Sasori and Deidara briefly argue about art, in which Sasori threatens to kill Deidara. Deidara replies that they are already dead so it didn’t matter. When they confront the Surprise Attack Division of the Allied Shinobi Forces. Deidara exclaims for them not to “underestimate this artistic duo”. Though they could not be killed do to the nature of the reanimation jutsu, Sasori still made attempts to protect Deidara from Omoi’s sword attack. They are quickly captured inside of two Black Ant Puppets belonging to Kankuro. Kankuro begins to tell Sasori how he has been immortalized because his soul carries on in his creations. Deidara becomes enraged, making fervent pleas for Sasori not to listen. He attempts to blow himself up with c0, but his explosion is stopped by Omoi’s lightning style. Sasori soul is released after he receives closure from Kankuro’s statement. This shocks Deidara, who yells out for Sasori to answer him. In an anime filler episode, Deidara manages to briefly escape from captivity with the help of Zetsu. While alone, Deidara reveals himself to be sad about how Sasori “went to soon” and how he was now alone. He is ultimately recaptured and his soul would be released after Kabuto undid the reincarnation jutsu.

Conclusions on Sasori and Deidara’s Relationship

Though the two of them are often fighting about their art, they seem to generally care for each other. Sasori constantly threatens to kill Deidara, but at the same time goes out of his way protect Deidara when they fight together such as from Kankuro in the Kazekage Rescue Arc and from Omoi in the Shinobi World War Arc. He also frequently lectures Deidara about being properly prepared in fights. Deidara seems enjoy getting Sasori angry at him, taking pleasure in making him wait and going against what Sasori wants when he takes Gaara’s body to lure Naruto away in the Kazekage Rescue Arc. Ironically he seems to display a lot more care for Sasori when he dies, like when he wanted to kill Orochimaru in honor of Sasori in the Itachi Pursuit Arc or in the Shinobi World War where he thought to himself how Sasori went to quickly and that he was now alone. Strangely enough when they are around each other they can’t seem to help but argue. Perhaps it was just too difficult for them to admit that they needed each other.

#IM SOBBING WHILE READING THIS #i love this ship sm #anime #naruto #sasodei #😭😭

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minthysugamon · 4 years

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Everybody wants to Rule the World. (Part 2)

Noble Assistant,Sergeant! Namjoon x Assassin! Reader.

1789! AU

Word Count: 2,111 (angel number go brrr again)

Warnings: Slight misogyny,beheading,blood,death...i think that's all.

(Credit for the Original Photo: @/athenaa. I only edited it a little bit. But all credit goes to the original artist who posted the photo first in it's original version)

(Painting: La liberté guidant le peuple by Eugène Delacroix)

12 Août,1787. (Flashback)

After reading every word of Voltaire,Maximilien became more and more riled up by the thrill of the revolution. The adrenaline of change was getting the best of him,he had no time to care about his little sister,(Y/n) Robespierre,who would simply block him from getting in the city. The Robespierre family was more than just concerned about their eldest child,the Gem of their family. (Y/n) hated the injustice their father casted upon them. She wanted to learn,he wouldn't let her. Henriette tried to reason her but stubborn,like her brother,she went up in Paris,alone,in the quest of knowledge.

After arriving at Le Marais,her first goal was to find her brother. Nothing more,nothing less. And finding him,she did. But not in his expected state. "Maximilien,laissez moi entrer.¹" A groan was heard from the man but he got up to let his sistet in. "What are you doing here? I told you to stay at home,in Arras. Is it so hard to follow my or father's wishes?" He sighed and pulled a chair out for her. 'How chivalrous.' (Y/n) thought to herself. "Mon frère,i came here to ask you a favor." Her eyes,full of hope,heart racing,the negative answer from him already anticipated. "And what would that favor be? If it's to join some political club,it's a no. And i won't listen to any begging. No is-" "I know. No is no. I don't even want to join those. All i wanted to ask from you is to teach me the art of law."

Maximilien sighed. He knew she will never be accepted as a lawyer,as much as she wanted. In the end,(Y/n) was a woman. Not a male apprentice. But a simple woman. "So...? Will you please teach me...?" Her voice resonated through the small living room,a hint of hope and a dust of desperation sticking to it. "No. I can't. I already taught you everything you had to know. I can't teach you more." Maximilien simply sat down on a chair,looking at her. How could have his sister,a woman from such a delicate mother,turned out like a man? "Is it because i'm a woman?" "It's because you won't be accepted. I'm only doing you a favor here,if you haven't noticed. Ta demande est ridicule. Et tu le sais très bien.² I won't let a Robespierre be turned into laughing stock. Not only your honor depends on it,but our whole family's."

Objecting her brother was the worst thing she could ever do. The man was stubborn and always stuck to his own ideologies for the better or the worst. "But you know-" "STOP IT. NOW. I DON'T WANT TO HEAR ABOUT THAT ANYMORE. I SAID NO. AND NOTHING WILL CHANGE THAT. YOU ARE A WOMAN. KNOW YOUR PLACE FOR GOD'S SAKE." The heavy breathing coming from the eldest was enough to make the atmosphere heavy between them. (Y/n) stood up and put the chair back as if she was never on it. "Alright. Thank you for your time,Maître Robespierre. Je me tâcherai à ne plus vous contre-dire.³" Stepping out of the residence,(Y/n) let the door slam against it's frame. The silence was too heavy around Maximilien. He wanted to tell her he's sorry,but he knew it won't change anything. Her pride was too high for her own good. So he put his aside for once,as unwilling as he was. "Alright. Come back. If you want to learn. You will learn. From me. But don't tell anyone about this. Est-ce clair?⁴"

The young woman's eyes lit up. For the first time,she achieved to coerce something useful out of her brother,something that will be helpful for her future. "Crystal clear,Maximilien." She did a 180 and started walking towards the door of the small and stuffed place the elder was living in,passing right beside him. "So? When do we start? I wanna know everything." An innocent but playful smile spreading on her face as she spoke took Maximilien by surprise. "Quoi?⁵ Not even a simple thank you?" The tone in his voice was laced with fake-hurt. He was annoyed but somewhat proud of her sister's persuasion skills. If she was a man,she would've been a very good lawyer. Putting ultimatums where they belong,it requires skill.

14 Juillet,1789.

After getting some powder,Namjoon was finally recharging his gun,the fact he owed his life to a revolutionist still had him shocked. 'Why?' wasn't his only question though,he wanted to know more about that woman. "COUPEZ-LUI LA TÊTE!⁶" the chant of the crowd grew louder and louder as his foster father was escorted by some peasants. While the sergeant of the troop was laying dead jn the hallway,the squad's organisation itself was frantic,none of them had endured such debauchery before.

"Sir,what should we do? We can't let the colonel down." One of the soldiers finally spoke up after a long moment of silence. His ears were ringing. The loud gun noises made him lose all auditory senses,but he still spoke up despite not being able to think clearly and having no military experience. "Wait here. If i signal the path is cleared,you follow. Divide in two divisions. We can't sacrifice anyone. If anything,i prefer sacrificing myself if there's a chance to lead you into safety. May God be with all of you."

Namjoon had no idea what came over him and moreover had no idea how to command,but he strong leadership De Launay has showed during his younger years may have stuck with him. One thing is sure,he won't commit the error of turning his troops against himself. Maybe getting killed was his destiny after all,but he would do everything in his power to not have the one who raised him killed. After hiding behind a pillar,the man signaled to the first troop to come and hide behind the chariot. The chariot the battle was going on for,the precious gun powder those uncultured men couldn't use. Hell,even him,he was new to the battle but the situation couldn't degrade more.

"Here's what we're going to do. We have to use up all the powder while the second troop can finally get to safety. Negociating with these savages already failed,we have to act." The youngest soldier, Nathanaël du Rhône, looked him in awe, their leader, Kim Namjoon, the man who was once a Stranger, was more worried about their safety than his. The newly appointed Staff Sergeant pointed to Nathanaël. "You. Signal to the others that they can come,then hide and leave. You have more than just a fight to live. The others,you come with me. Hide,aim and charge. I'll signal you when to shoot." De Launay has noticed his son due to his inattention,his hat was in the wrong direction. He simply smiled at the determination of the young chief then mouthed a simple 'You'll be alright son." in his direction while the three man were still escorting him out to the court of the prison.

"Wait....Now. Shoot." And the men acted as Namjoon said,including himself. They fired the shots,simultaneously touching the three who were holding the Colonel. Recharge,aim shoot again all the people who were flocking in the court. Once they had no other choice and were blocked,the hiding spot was discovered too. But he won't let his men down easily,he wasn't raised to do so. "Gather the explosives. We must light them and decimate the crowd or else this hell will never end."

After throwing one of the smoke torches in the crowd,he started running towards his elder, successfully stabbing one of the new detainers in the throat with the bayonette of his shotgun. "Père.⁷You must come. I beg you." De Launay simply nodded a no and smiled "My destiny was to die protecting the king and the prison. Now go before they get you too. You're too young to die." Namjoon wanted to do another round before he saw the head of the Colonel falling,in addition thhe man's blood splattered over his face as he wasn't more than 3 meters away. "Chef. Ils nous ont encerclé⁸. We must go." A new smoke torch was thrown by the youngest soldier on the ground,blinding the revolutionists as he held back his chief from going rampage over the ones who killed the one he called father. "NO I CAN'T. I CAN'T LET HIM DIE." Namjoon screamed frantically as Nathanaël was pulling him by the arm, at the same time asking for help from his troop mates. Two other men came to hold the new and young Sergeant down,escorting him to a hiding place,not wanting to lose their only commandant in this butchery.

15 Juillet,1789.

After staying up all night,the sun was rising. 'Finally', (Y/N) thought to herself. The night was long enough already when she simply had woken up from night terrors and waited for the light of the day to reassure her,but now that she had to wait for her brother, it seemed like an eternity. Sitting on the roof of the house Maître Robespierre lived in,she had the privilege to eat something that many couldn't, an apple. The thought of saving that guy in the early afternoon was prancing around her mind, not fully understanding why she did what she did. 'I should've killed him. Now he's one of my countless problems.' Her inner monologue was eating her up,much like she was munching on the green fruit. Due to the bad harvests of the previous years,it was as sour as her mood.

After finishing the apple,eating the core,even if it was more than just acidic and putting the seeds into a small pocket of her leather pants,she knew she should get down the roof and change back into her normal attire to hide her activity. As long as Maximilien didn't know about anything,she was safe. He wouldn't condone her actions even if she was killing the noblemen he oh so strongly opposed. As murderous as his desires were, the thought of a woman being better than him made his skin crawl. The crowd had finally died down too,people went back to their residences or the small shelter they were at to sleep,it was around two in the morning that the chants started to become more and more quiet and at three,not a single soul was seen wandering the streets. It was although now five in the morning and she knew,her brother would soon come back from the whorehouse he went to. After finally getting into her dress,she went out the door to finally get some bread. 'Oh to be a man and not give a piece of mind about the opinions of others.' she thought as she entered the local bakery.

"Bien le bonjour, mademoiselle⁹ ,early today,i see! Let me guess,the usual or are we changing it up today?" The baker, Jean-Hugues Lefèvre, was known for his kindness towards his costumers although since bread was a missing article nowadays,he always managed to sneak some to the poorest families,giving up his rations to save others. The baker had already started packing the two loaves,as usual until his actions were interrupted by (Y/n)'s voice. "Just one loaf will be enough,thank you. I'm only buying for my brother,i am going back home today." As he was choosing the best loaf,he raised an eyebrow. "Oh? So soon? It hasn't been two months thought,as you said ten days ago." She smiled awkwardly,not knowing how to engage in the small talk,making herself feel smaller. "Well...i guess the Parisian air made me feel a little bit exthau-" her phrase couldn't be finished as somebody barged into the shop.

"Bonjour, Monsieur Lefèvre." The intruder was a tall man,smelling like gunpowder and cologne "Bonjour, Sergent Kim. Congratulations on your rank. You fought well. I am sorry about what happened with the Colonel. What can i serve you with?" Jean-Hugues gave (Y/N) the loaf as he told her the price and the another man looked at her. "Three loaves please..." Thoughtful was the only way to describe him once he caught a look of the eyes of the woman,and (Y/N) had a suspicion why,so she ushered herself out of the bakery. "Wait a minute." The man called out. So she turned around "Yes?" Trying to seem confident out of the cape and mask that hid her face yesterday was harder to do than to say. "Haven't we met somewhere?" A genuine curiosity was displayed on his face. As much as she knew the right answer,the lie was necessary. "I don't think so. Have a nice day,Monsieur Lefèvre." And the girl started heading to the Robespierre residence.

Left dumbfounded and with three loaves for his 10 men, Namjoon was thinking about where he had seen those eyes before. "The girl from yesterday."

Translations

¹ Let me enter

² Your request is ridiculous. And you know that well.

³ I'll make sure to never argue with you again.

⁴ Is it clear?

⁵ What?

⁶ Chop his head off!

⁷ Father.

⁸Chief,they have surrounded us.

⁹Well good morning there,Miss.

A/N: Hello there. There will be probably a part 3,but i don't know when. I don't promise it will be before april but i'll try to write it before. Please note that i try to stay as close to history as possible but as this is an AU,there are some modifications here and there. This is pure fiction please do not take this for something real. Thank you. (Only saying because i've gotten some hateful DMs bc of the first part).

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whoisaditya · 3 years

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A love letter to The Wombats

First, a brief background about The Wombats: The Wombats is an interesting English Indie Rock Band. They started back in 2003 in Liverpool, United Kingdom. The most interesting thing about them is how experimental they are with their albums — considering their vast range. One might think that The Wombats don’t care about what you and I think. They care about their art and what that represents. This is what makes them free to do whatever they want. Now, the album that I want to talk about is some of their earlier work. It was released back in 2007. Damn, that feels like an eternity ago. So let’s begin our journey.

The first track: Tales of Girls, Boys and Marsupials. For me, this track prepares you for what’s to come. It is a good melody and relatively simple. I’ve always enjoyed it because of how strange it is. From this, we move onto the second track.

Kill the Director. This is the song that brought me to the album, and for a long time, it was one of the most played songs for me on Spotify. When I think of this song, I think of the music video which you should watch. The song is different from the first track, and it is faster and has a lot of content. My favourite things are British pop culture references. The nods to Bridget Jones’s Diary and EastEnders make this a quintessentially British song.

Track 3: Moving to New York, this song has always been close to my heart because it is edgy. It tells us what the British think of American cities like New York. I have always had trouble understanding this song due to multiple reasons. Even right now while I’m reading the lyrics and thinking about what to write about them, I am confused. If you look at it literally, the song talks about sleeplessness and Christmas for some reason. Now, let me tell you what I feel about it. This has always been a song to which I headbang and do the air guitar. I never really understood the lyrics. I probably never will. Though, my favourite part has been these lines.

“I put one foot forward and ended up 30 yards back.

Am I losing touch, or am I just completely off the track?

And I don’t know why I want to voice this out loud.

It’s therapeutic somehow.”

Especially the line, “Am I losing touch or am I just completely off track”. Back when I first heard this song, the pandemic was at its peak. I was preparing for entrances, and life was a mess. I related to this, and I’m sure you guys will as well. This song will make you feel things and reconsider life as a whole.

Now, moving onto track 4, Lost in the Post. This is the most popular song on the album. The song sounds surprisingly happy, but when you pay attention, the lyrics are depressing. It is my kind of music because it tells us a story with a catchy chorus. The line that has stuck with me is “She Wanted Mary Poppins but I took her to King Lear”. It represents so much more than you and I can comprehend. It represents not being enough and a theme of overcompensation followed by under-compensation. Its a simple song but the Wombats have done a good job of packing it with references. It is a song about insecurities and love, the two things that are fundamental to any artist.

Track 5: Party in a Forest(Where’s Laura?). Laura, oh, Laura. I will never truly understand this song. Is it a love letter to Laura or is it a desperate man singing for a girl who will never love him back? Throughout the song, he keeps calling out to Laura, but there’s no response. By the end of it, it seems like he has almost given up. Maybe I’m just reading too much into music, or perhaps this boy is writing songs about a gender he doesn’t understand.

Track 6 is something most of us can relate to. Titled “Schools Uniform”, it is literally from the perspective of a teenage boy going through puberty. It is not the typical “Oh. I miss school” song, but maybe a more realistic approach to what school was. Those uniforms, which most of us claim to miss, perhaps made a joke of us. He sings about a girl he likes and who he used to be friends with, but now she has an older boyfriend. The most important thing about this song is how teens romanticise/think that smoking is cool. It’s the whole trope of doing something because someone else is doing it. After all, someone has deemed it cool. The song does an excellent job of talking about how teenagers try their best to fit in to get the validation they so desperately want. This is generally executed by doing things that most of the time is not good for them, and here ends track 6.

Moving on to track 7, the song I’m most excited to write about. Here Comes the Anxiety is the epitome of a cry for help. It is probably the most painful to listen to because it doesn’t even hide that it is sad. I have to give it credit for being honest about its message. In a messed up way, this taught me how to be honest about myself. The song starts by calling out what I think is all music where creators hide the real message behind catchy hooks and other techniques. The essence of the song is hypocritical; it has a catchy hook line(It is literally in the title). The song is just lying to you; it tries to sell an honest image, but it is not. Don’t get me wrong, it is a good song, but it is just like everything else. It is a dark song like it claims to be. It is a song about a lonely man who doesn’t want to be alone, and that’s about it for track 7.

Let’s Dance to Joy Division is one of my favourite songs. So, I have a sort of personal bias towards it. It is happy and real but also quite sad. The lines

“Everything is going wrong but we’re so happy” perfectly captures the essence of this kind of music. It is happy music, so don’t question it. You don’t need to be comfortable while listening to it, maybe sing along and pretend that your life isn’t going to shit. My interpretation of this song is, you shouldn’t question life while it is happening. If something has to go wrong, it probably will, so why even worry about it. Just be happy and maybe play this on a loop.

Track 9 is Backfire at the Disco. It describes a heterosexual first date. A guy gets ready at 8 pm, meets the girl and then gets slapped. The story is pretty straightforward. The guy makes a move at the wrong time. The girl slaps him in response and has to go back home alone at 3 am. What’s important to me isn’t the story but how it’s told. The song starts with how everything is fine and how it is all going okay. It sounds like the girl is in the wrong and that we should feel bad for the guy. The song gets pretty misogynistic when he calls her dress whorish. To give him some credit, he does admit his mistake by the end, but then it is too late, and the narrative has been set. This victimisation of the perpetrator is extremely harmful. It creates a story that men don’t know what to do and how it is an honest mistake. This message is toxic, and anyone listening to this should keep this in mind.

Little Miss Pipedream describes a toxic one-sided relationship. The song is comparatively slower-paced, where the stress is on the lyrics. The song expects us to feel sympathy for this man who is madly in love with this girl. The protagonist is portrayed as a friendly guy who is willing to wait for this girl. This man has selfish ideas of love, and he’s trying to convince the listeners to sympathise with him. These ideas are selfish because they are all based around him. Lyrics like, “Don’t leave miss pipedream cause I love you.” is an example of what is incorrect with this song. Pop culture has often romanticised these ideas and portrayed these men as heroes.

Track 11 is about a therapist named Dr Susan. It is clear that Dr Susan is treating and is prescribing him narcotics. He is infatuated with her and is willing to do anything for her. This is clearly some toxic behaviour. The singer keeps repeating “This Time” which means that he has done this before. The most concerning thing is “Help Me Help Help Me, Susan”. We can see a theme where he asks for help but no one gives it to him and there ends track 11.

Track 12 is about loving a woman who doesn’t want to be loved. The singer has fallen in love with a stripper and is willing to do anything to be with her. His behaviour indicates that he has lost track of reality. In his head, his actions are part of a grander love story but it is psychotic behaviour. This is ironic cause the last song was about a therapist. He clearly knows what he is doing is wrong but he still continues to do so. This entire song does a good job of showing a messed up, toxic relationship between a desperate man and a stripper.

The story of Track 13 is set at the wedding of the protagonist’s ex-girlfriend. It does something unusual by portraying alcoholic tendencies at a wedding. The lyrics make it clear that he still has some feelings for his ex-girlfriend. I don’t know where the blame lies on this one because of the conflicting narratives. The repetition of the line, “She’s not that beautiful” shows us his hatred towards the bride and how our emotions are more complex than they seem. One would assume that after all this time he wouldn’t resent his old partner but he does. This is because humans are complicated and irrational and there’s nothing we can do about it. This also shows how when we are with someone everything seems romantic but when they leave we criticise all their actions. To conclude, the song is quite entertaining and definitely worth listening to.

If you have read this until now and not skimmed as most people will, you must be thinking that all these songs sound somewhat similar. It’s a simple boy loves girl plot which is portrayed in multiple different settings. Before I started writing this, I thought that I would have something unique to write about each song, but I don’t. As I moved on from track to track, I realised that most of these are about the same thing. Does this mean the songs are not great? No, of course not, they are amazing. Each track is unique and has a storyline, the music is good, and that’s why people enjoy it. Music is subjective, and at the end of the day, my opinion means jackshit. Yeah, enjoy the music; I hope what I wrote made you think and introspect about the music you listen to.

#thewombats #british music #Indie

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soveryanon · 4 years

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Reviewing time for MAG166!

- It still amuses me that the end of the season 4 put to the foreground that the architecture of the Fears was extremely subjective, a way to try to perceive and describe them that wasn’t exactly it since they’re fundamentally indivisible… and yet Jon is back to using the division. It makes sense! The list of fourteen was, after all, used in Jonah’s incantation as he made it so that fourteen facets would reshape our world, with Beholding on top (MAG160: “all that is fear, and all that is terror, and all that is the awful dread that crawls and chokes and blinds and falls and twists and leaves and hides and weaves and burns and hunts and rips and bleeds and dies!”); the fact that Jon was marked by these fourteen, and the fact that Jon had an understanding of the Fears as a divisionto in fourteen, also probably influenced the way they reshaped reality into what it is now. We see the lines blurring (the “trenches” with sprinkles of Desolation, Corruption, Buried; the “sick village” with bits of Beholding fears and Lonely existence; the carousel with the logic of The Hunt; maybe a bit of Desolation with this one), but it also seems like Jon&Martin will have to experience thirteen domains before reaching the place The Eye is at its more powerful, The Panopticon/Institute? Jon said he knew what he was doing, he’s been gradually describing the process a bit more, and he’s still using the Smirke designations:

(MAG162) MARTIN: Back to the Archives? ARCHIVIST: Seems the best place to start. [RUMBLE OF THUNDER] MARTIN: Uh… Y–eah, alright! [WOODEN CREAKING SOUND] ARCHIVIST: Martin… It’s going to be a hard journey.

(MAG163) ARCHIVIST: It means the journey will be the journey, regardless of how we choose to make it. […] You could see that tower from anywhere on Earth. And it can see you. And if you walk towards it, eventually you’ll get there. But you have to go through everything in-between. […] MARTIN: What do you mean, “everything”? What’s out here? ARCHIVIST: […] Nightmares. [BANG IN THE DISTANCE] Come on – that trench is our first.

(MAG164) MARTIN: How much further do we still need to go? [STATIC INCREASES] ARCHIVIST: A long way. Through many dark and awful places…

(MAG165) MARTIN: But. You said we needed to go through these places. … Is that even going to work here? ARCHIVIST: Uh… [EXHALE] We need to go through them… metaphorically. MARTIN: Mm… ! ARCHIVIST: Psychologically, we need to… “experience” them. […] You might want to take a bit of a walk. This… feels like a strange one… [LOUDER SCREAMS IN THE DISTANCE] MARTIN: What does “strange” mean, with something like this? […] I kinda want to hear that tape now, see how artistic The Stranger actually is.

(MAG166) ARCHIVIST: I… It’s hard to put into words. Loo–l… [SIGH] Look, we can talk about it later, we’re– coming to a… “domain of The Buried”, and [STATIC RISES] I would really rather… […] [LONG EXHALE] God, I hate The Buried. [DEEP BREATHS] … End recording.

Since Jon told Martin the trenches were their “first” nightmare, the cabin didn’t count. So we got The Slaughter, through The War and butchery; The Corruption, through fungi and paranoia/xenophobia (the sick love and hate, the sense of community turned wrong); The Stranger, through the carousel, the identity-stealing and the loss of self; The Buried, through limitations, poverty and the crush of a system only allowing for unobtainable hope – The Stranger and The Buried even being namedropped outside of the statements. So what “rips”, what “crawls”, what “hides” and what “chokes”.

Still remaining: what “blinds” (Dark), what “falls” (Vast), what “twists” (Spiral), what “leaves” (Lonely), what “weaves” (Web), what “burns” (Desolation), what “hunts” (Jonah didn’t even bother finding a synonym for The Hunt, uh.), what “bleeds” (Flesh) and what “dies” (End). And we already got glimpses of the Spiral and Web’s activities through Helen and Annabelle. I think the hardest for Jon and Martin, given their own life-experiences, will probably be The Web and The Lonely? Though given that Annabelle is finally revealing herself, it might be a way to get them the Web-experience without going through a physical domain (though if there is one, I’d still bank on Hill Top Road on their way to the Panopticon).

- Same thing as in MAG164, where the enemies were “pigs” and “rats” and thus had animal’s faces to the other side’s eyes: people felt like “worms” during their lives, so were turned into beings which operated like ones:

(MAG166) ARCHIVIST: “When had the crushing pressure in his chest become literal? When had the empty promise of the horizon finally vanished completely, replaced by the pitch darkness of this ‘forever wall of earth’? […] His existence was static, and eternal. […] But these things, grim and fearful as they were, were not unfamiliar. The aching hunger was not new, not simply a gift of the eager soil. He had flashes of an empty belly not assuaged by hands, cracked and calloused from long, grim hours of labour. There was a shadow in his mind of sleepless nights, spent toiling, tired and shaking, desperate for some relief from the relentless pressure that crushed the life of the man who had been Sam – before he was a worm. And a worm he surely was, for what else could spasm, crawling limbless through the ground, millimetre by millimetre, making its lonely way towards some secret destination no human could understand? Perhaps he did still have arms or legs or the luxury of both; but down here, it was impossible to tell, pressed so close together that to draw a line between a torso and a folded, bending limb was pointless. If it moves like a worm, thinks like a worm, and screams its awful agonies towards the distant taunting sky like a worm… well. The conclusion is obvious.”

(I… didn’t mentally represent them as “worms” in my mind, but really like humans who had bent and discoloured due to the lack of sun and the conditions they were living in.)

So, nightmare logic, in which metaphors and similes (people who were condemned to poverty, stagnation and a crushing life of debt) become literal, and reshape people’s world.

This season reaaaaaally isn’t escapism (and is even plain unpleasant/disgusting at times for me) when it comes to inter-personal violence, with victims consistently furthering other victims’ misery: soldiers killing each other while trying to alleviate their own pain and nurses turning their backs on the injured (MAG163), villagers blaming “foreigners” for the village’s misery, telling on each other to protect themselves and burning the targeted person as retribution/protection (MAG164), fair-goers salvaging and robbing each other of shards of identity to alleviate their own pain (MAG165), people tearing each other to pieces to try and improve their chance of “climbing” to a better place (MAG166). It’s, honestly, the aspect that makes me the most uneasy this season, and “sweet” JonMartin moments don’t really help at all to alleviate these upsetting bits – I’m not really feeling “fear” or “horror” (mostly disgust and discomfort), and Jon&Martin being cosy and domestic just feels… out of place and almost disrespectful at times, honestly…? ;; (It doesn’t really work as a “compensation” or as a way to try to erase the aftertaste when people are still suffering and living hell…)

However, this episode did assuage my concerns a bit regarding what is truly condemned, what is truly held responsible, and where the narration seems to be standing in regards to accountability:

(MAG166) ARCHIVIST: [EXHALE] [STATIC RISES] “Down; down; down, down. [STATIC FADES] Down below the earth, there was a worm. He had not always been a worm, of course, but time and tide and life had pushed him to it. His name, he dimly recalled, was Sam; and he was, as definitely always had been the case… trapped. Boarded on all sides with no escape, and no recourse. Even in his faint and fading memories of a life that wasn’t simply stone and rancid, reeking soil, he wasn’t sure he’d ever known a thing that might be called freedom. […] Poor Sam has no way to know his neighbour’s name is Richard, that he once struggled in a life as hard and desperate as his own. That his dreams of the light, and painful screaming climb towards it, is just as keen and gruelling. All that matters is that this new worm is facing up; and Sam, because of how he entered the tunnel, is facing down. How do you fight, when you cannot move beyond the slowest inching crawl, without limbs or weapons or the kinetic force of violence? You do it slowly, pressing, biting; tearing gradually through each other until at the very end… one of you is still. There is no light, for Sam is faced away from it and blocking it from his opponent. But even were it bathed in stark illumination, no one could have said for sure where the sticky mud ended and the ragged, bloody faces began. A cloying mass of teeth and tears and torn skin, as two terrified victims… slowly chew through each other, over a distant hope that neither would ever be allowed to achieve. When it is done, Richard is dead, or quiet enough as makes no difference, and the tunnel belongs to Sam. It is identical to the one that he has left, in all ways other than that he had to do an awful thing to get it. And still, he faces downwards. […] But at last, Sam has his victory: he has claimed another tunnel, and he can see the light. Perhaps this one will be better, will let him squirm up higher. But underneath is still that lurking fear that maybe… it is worse. [RAIN BEGINS TO FALL, HARSHLY] The truth is plain enough, though, even as he fights so hard not to know it – there is no difference. [THE BURIED SONG FADES] And as the rains begin to fall once again, he knows the world will never let him escape the depths to which he has fallen. Better to keep him Buried, neatly away.”

I felt that the pity was more obvious than in previous statements, and it tied in neatly with Helen’s and Jon’s explanations of how the new world operates: that there is a system, feeding on people’s pain and suffering, creating circumstances in which their options are reduced to causing more harm or allowing others to inflict it on them, but that fundamentally, the system feeds from it, is dependant on it, and is at fault in the first place. I was really really fearing that we were heading towards a “oh, actually, it’s HUMAN NATURE, and HUMANS ARE FUNDAMENTALLY BAD” conclusion, but no, this episode made clearer that the series is still on the “side” of humans – and denouncing oppressive systems that rely on their suffering, orchestrate everything to squeeze it out of them, pit them against each other and make collaborative efforts impossible. Yes, in the story, Richard would rightfully have grievance to have been gored by Sam; but Sam didn’t get any benefit out of it (outside of surviving a bit longer), unlike The Buried and The Eye (who put them there and are fed by their distress). Jon spitting “God, I hate The Buried.” afterwards highlighted that he was extremely conscious of it.

… It does however raise a few questions regarding avatars’ and monsters’ own accountability, and I felt like Jon’s discomfort this episode might lead towards more in that regard (but more about this later). I’m also a bit ;; going back to being worried about how season 5 will end: I’m not that much “worried” over Jon and Martin meeting a tragic end (it’s a given anyway, and they’re main characters, I’m fine with that), but I’m concerned about humanity as a whole. How do you go back to normal after living these nightmares of tearing each other down? Can you even do that? And, if the system is at fault: it would feel very odd if the outcome were for Jon, outside-of-the-box yet a necessary gear in the system, to be the one to undo it and fix everything (only someone inside of the system could undo it and be a Saviour to all of humanity? Suuuper weird). I’m thinking more and more than… no, there won’t be anything, no way to “fix” this and to separate the Fears from people, and either people will be stuck like this forever, either Jon will (accidentally or not) provoke an Extinction cataclysm to free them from their misery – which is… well, “main characters get to decide the fate of all humanity” is honestly not my cup of tea. The most hopeful scenario I can picture is Jon creating enough of a fracture to allow people to regain some agency in the nightmares, allowing them to collaborate and to fight against the fears on their own, but I’m really not sure. There was a big theme in the episode of The Buried relying on the hope that things could get better, pushing you towards an unreachable goal only to rob it from you and basking in your misery before the process begins again – it’s… uncannily fitting to Jon&Martin’s current quest, their hope of managing to do something about the apocalypse.

- On a lighter note: so we finally know why the Coffin sang when it rained!!

(MAG002, Joshua Gillespie) “It was almost… melodious. It sounded almost like singing, if it was muffled by twenty feet of hard-packed soil. At first I thought it might have been coming from one of the other flats in my building, but as it went on, and the hairs on my arms began to stand on end I knew, I just knew, where it was coming from. I walked to the living room and stood in the doorway, watching as the sealed wooden box continued to moan its soft, musical sound out at the rain. […] And so it continued for a few months. Whatever was in the casket would scratch at anything placed on top of it and moan whenever it rained, and that was that.”

(MAG101) [LOW BACKGROUND SOUNDS, POSSIBLY VOCAL; VOICES SOUND AS IF SOMEWHERE BELOW GROUND] […] NIKOLA: Now could you two please move that thing somewhere far, far away? BREEKON: Not really. HOPE: Needs to be near us. NIKOLA: Well, just… just move yourselves away, and take it with you. BREEKON: Gotcha HOPE: Right you are. [CHAINS RATTLE AS THEY PICK UP THE COFFIN AND DEPART; CHORAL HUM FADES, REPLACED BY BACKGROUND SOUND OF RAIN OUTSIDE, SOMEWHERE]

(MAG132) DAISY: I, I, I can’t move, I can’t… and I can’t… breathe, and… ARCHIVIST: Oh god… DAISY: [LABOURED] Just… alone, I, I think… I think… I hear this, sometimes, s–singing, when it’s, uh, when it’s wet, or, or scratching, trying to get out… but I don’t… I don’t th… don’t think there is anyone… there; it’s… it’s just, just me… ‘till now.

(MAG166) ARCHIVIST: “Until the rains begin to fall. The rains fall here as they do so many places in this new world: thick, and oily drops that taste of bitter salt; torrential tears plummeting from the watching sky, thumping and squelching onto the thirsty soil in which the worms writhe painfully towards a surface that does not want them. [THE BURIED SONG BEGINS, RISING IN INTENSITY] The ground softens. Shifts. And starts to slip and flow into a torrent of black mud. [RUMBLE OF THUNDER] Deep below, Sam feels rain begin to drip upon his forehead, and he knows exactly what it means. He wants to scream again, but he is so tired by his ascent that the only sound he can produce is a low, defeated wail. And as has happened so many times before in his poor defeated life, he feels the walls begin to shift and soften, as the slippery flood pushes him down; down; [MUFFLED THUMP] down. [MUFFLED THUMP] Deeper, perhaps, than he has ever been before, so deep the light is almost gone, but never is the darkness fully complete.”

Same as the calliope music last episode, I really wasn’t expecting to hear the Coffin song again. And it was the echoing “defeated wail(s)” of people trapped inside of it, knowing they would get their hopes once again crushed by the rain pushing them back down. (So Daisy&Jon probably contributed to the song when they were whimpering because of the pressure getting worse, in MAG132…)

- I love (and cry about) how the Coffin expedition remains a lingering trauma for Jon – he was marked by all fourteen, but it really feels like out of them, Mr. Spider, Jane Prentiss and the Coffin impacted him the most in the entire show?

(MAG132) ARCHIVIST: Right, hum… [CLEARS THROAT] Uh… [STATIC] H–how are you feeling? DAISY: Uh… Scared. I–I’m, I’m, I’m scared. I’ve been scared the whole time here. Not just when it’s, when it’s cr–crushing, when it f–fills your, y–your mouth with d–dirt… I–it knows when to stop, wh–when to ea–ease back, so you don’t… don’t lose it or, or grow numb… L–leaves you terrified for when it s–starts a–again and, wh–when it does, you, you’re s–scared that it’ll… n–never–never stop… I thought, thought I’d… I’d ne–never see the s–sky again, never… never s–see Basira…

(MAG133) ARCHIVIST: And give Daisy a break. She was there eight months. [EXHALE] I was only in there for three days, and I– BASIRA: Yeah, I know. I just…

(MAG136) DAISY: [QUICKLY] You’re not babysitting me, alright?! I know that’s what the others think, sometimes, but… that’s not it. I just… don’t like… being on my own if I can help it. You know. Flashbacks, panic attacks, the usual. Just trying to avoid it if I can. ARCHIVIST: I know, Daisy, I–I do. It’s hard.

(MAG166) ARCHIVIST: [LONG EXHALE] … God, I hate The Buried. [DEEP BREATHS] … End recording.

;; Of course Jon would be most sensible to The Buried’s logic of repeatedly giving hope and denying a positive outcome: he was deeply impacted by it although he “only” experienced it for three days (so. It was really bad.), and it might uncomfortably resonate with his current journey – after all, Jon and Martin are heading towards the Archives in the hope that they could fix the mess, without any certainty that they will be able to. It’s making them move forwards. But it has also been stated in MAG162 that The Eye wanted Jon/the Archive to “emerge” from the cabin – what if Jon&Martin were only pushed to make that journey, motivated by hope, just to further entertain Beholding when there is no chance in the first place that they could ever succeed?

- I really appreciated how Jon’s outburst mirrored the first time he had revealed his true feelings about his situation to Martin, back in season 1:

(MAG039) ARCHIVIST: I still think most of the statements down here aren’t real. Of the hundreds I’ve recorded, we’ve had maybe… thirty, forty that are… that go on tape. Now those, I believe, at least for the most part. MARTIN: Then why do you– ARCHIVIST: Because I’m scared, Martin! Because when I record these statements it feels… it feels like I’m being watched. I… I lose myself a bit. And then when I come back, it’s like… like if I admit there may be any truth to it, whatever’s watching will… know somehow. The scepticism, feigning ignorance. It just felt safer. MARTIN: Well… It wasn’t. ARCHIVIST: No. No, it wasn’t.

(MAG166) MARTIN: Sure! Okay, that’s… I mean, that’s really not that complicated, Jon – I don’t see why you were being so coy about it! ARCHIVIST: [OVERLAPPING] Because I’m ashamed, Martin. MARTIN: … “Ashamed”? ARCHIVIST: Yes! Ashamed of the fact that I… destroyed the world and have been rewarded for it; the fact that… I can walk safe through all this horror I’ve created like a fucking tourist, destroying whoever I please; the fact that I… enjoyed it, and… the fact that there are… so many others, that I still want to revenge myself on! [EXHALE]

Jon keeping it all in until it’s too much, until Martin probes him and he has to explain the actual feelings motivating him. Back then, the “worms” were The Hive threatening them from outside the safe room, an enemy and an invader which hurt and killed people; back then, Jon was assuming that there was nothing left of Jane Prentiss as a person, and that it was just a monster going after them. Now… the “worms” are miserable people, pressured by exterior forces feeding from them, pushed to do terrible things for survival and hope, right under their feet. Enough of an echo, but enough to also highlight how the main “enemy” seems to have shifted, from punctual monsters to the Fear-machinery itself?

- I spent the whole time since MAG142 not-super-fond-of-Jon, and I’m surprised that this episode made me genuinely side with him so much! Mostly, he said things that I have been needing to hear from him? It worked better on me than the previous moments Jon had expressed guilt about his new abilities and what had happened:

(MAG161) MARTIN: Well, just as well I don’t remember my dreams. ARCHIVIST: I do. MARTIN: Uh– What? ARCHIVIST: They… I see most of the suffering around here. When it’s quiet, it just… it’s like… I can see it, like I’m watching all of it. MARTIN: You haven’t been opening the curtains? ARCHIVIST: No, I don’t need to. “It” can see us here, and… [WOODEN CREAKING SOUND] And I can see out as well. MARTIN: O–kay, we’ll just file that under… ominous, for now. […] Jon, it’s not your fault… ARCHIVIST: Martin, can we not do this again. MARTIN: Sorry. ARCHIVIST: I’m just… I’m mourning a world I killed…! MARTIN: I know… ARCHIVIST: And we’re all trapped in its rotting corpse…! MARTIN: [FIRMLY] Enough, Jon.

(MAG164) ARCHIVIST: Look, I’ve no interest in your… gloating. HELEN: What would I have to gloat about? Much as I am delighted by this brave new world in which we find ourselves, I can take no credit for it. This was all… you! ARCHIVIST: You could’ve–! … You knew what was happening. […] HELEN: Oh, such devotion…! You really don’t deserve it. But of course… you know that already! [LAUGHS AND LAUGHS, ECHOING] This is nice! I am really glad we get to spend some proper, quality time together now.

(MAG166) ARCHIVIST: [SIGH] MARTIN: … Ssso, are we going to talk about it…? ARCHIVIST: [INHALE] MARTIN: Or…? [FOOTSTEPS STOP] [BAG JOSTLING] ARCHIVIST: What’s to talk about. MARTIN: What happened back there? What you did to Sa– … ARCHIVIST: Go on. Say it. MARTIN: … What you did to “that thing”. ARCHIVIST: I… killed it! [SILENCE] I… finally have the power; so I killed it! […] MARTIN: Sure! Okay, that’s… I mean, that’s really not that complicated, Jon – I don’t see why you were being so coy about it! ARCHIVIST: [OVERLAPPING] Because I’m ashamed, Martin. MARTIN: … “Ashamed”? ARCHIVIST: Yes! Ashamed of the fact that I… destroyed the world and have been rewarded for it; the fact that… I can walk safe through all this horror I’ve created like a fucking tourist, destroying whoever I please; the fact that I… enjoyed it, and… the fact that there are… so many others, that I still want to revenge myself on! [EXHALE]

Obviously, I don’t blame Jon for having been used to unleash the apocalypse; but I’m still relieved to know that he feels guilty about it, and, more importantly here, that he’s uncomfortable with his current situation. Because Jon, even if he didn’t actively pursue that goal, even if he didn’t embrace being an agent of Beholding relying on other people’s pain (whether he “chose” it or not is debatable since… Jon still made the “choice” of waking up in MAG121, and had enough information at the time to know what that was meant to encompass)… still is. He’s still feeding from this world, operating through it, able to know everything he wants. He’s not trapped in one of the nightmares, forced to go to War, or taken over by fungus, or prisoner of the gory carousel, or buried and crushed with no way to reach the sky. Jon was powerful enough to understand what the cabin was doing to him, and to leave it, and to go towards the Panopticon, and to observe the nightmares without being taken over by them:

(MAG163) MARTIN: J–J–Jon, Jon, w–we’re not alone. ARCHIVIST: I–ignore them, they’re not… Just ignore them. MARTIN: … They’re not… real? [VOICES SHOUTING IN THE DISTANCE] ARCHIVIST: [MIRTHLESS CHUCKLING] No…! They’re real; they were… normal people before the– … Before me. But now they’re here, meat for the grinder. I just mean there’s no point… talking to them. […] They won’t hear you, Martin, they’re all… too busy waiting to die.

(MAG164) ARCHIVIST: We’re fine. MARTIN: A–are we? I mean, that place is– … I don’t, I don’t feel fine, okay, and you were there a long time doing your… y–you–your guidebook, which, you know, I get it, but that place is… I–it’s–it’s infectious, and, I don’t– ARCHIVIST: We’re not infected, Martin, that place, it– … It isn’t for us. […] MARTIN: Are we safe, traveling like this? ARCHIVIST: Yes… Yes, sort of, we’re… I don’t know how to phrase it, we’re… something between a pilgrim and a moth. We can walk through these little worlds of terror, watching them; separate, and untouched.

(MAG165) MARTIN: Just get back! [THUMP] NOT!SASHA: I can’t believe you’d decide to pass through my neighbourhood and not say hello, to – dear – old – Sasha. ARCHIVIST: Just ignore it, Martin. […] God forbid you actually catch us. NOT!SASHA: [FURIOUS SNARLS] ARCHIVIST: Doesn’t bear thinking about…! MARTIN: Jon, what are you talking about? NOT!SASHA: [FURIOUS SNARLS] ARCHIVIST: She can’t touch us. We’re so far beyond her now. NOT!SASHA: [FURIOUS SNARLS] ARCHIVIST: She’s just like everything else here, rules by The Eye. [CHUCKLING] And she hates it…!

Jon hasn’t mentioned getting “hungry” since the beginning of the season, and Jonah had announced that Jon would be tailored for this new world, and Jon has already demonstrated that, by his own nature, he is, more than anyone:

(MAG160, Jonah Magnus) “Don’t worry, Jon. You’ll get used to it here – in the world that we have made.”

(Season 5 trailer) MARTIN: Are you still… [SIGH] “feeling it”? Seeing everything? ARCHIVIST: Yes, I, I’m trying not to, but… all of the fear, th–the anguish, i–it just… [INHALE] It keeps coming at me in waves, rolling over me, filling my head with such… awful sights. MARTIN: … I’m sorry. That sounds… [SMALL EXHALE] That sounds horrible. ARCHIVIST: … I wish it was, Martin. I really wish it was. … But it feels… right. [MIRTHLESS HUFF]

(MAG161) MARTIN: Jon, I… This isn’t healthy. ARCHIVIST: Healthy? I am an avatar of voyeuristic terror, whose unquestioned craving for knowledge has condemned the entire world… to an eternity of torment, “healthy” i–isn’t, i–it’s not…! MARTIN: Fine–fine. I get it. [CREAKING SOUND] ARCHIVIST: … Besides… G… [SHAKY EXHALE] Grief… is healthy. I–if nothing else, it pushes away the other feelings that that… thing wants me to experience.

(MAG162) ARCHIVIST: This cabin. [WOODEN CREAKING SOUND] It’s not right. And, when I thought that, I–I felt… It, it all poured out of me down… into the tape. MARTIN: [SIGH] ARCHIVIST: A–a–an–and it… felt good. It–it felt… right.

(MAG163) MARTIN: … How do you know all this stuff? [SILENCE] ARCHIVIST: Not sure…! I just do.

(MAG164) MARTIN: A–alright, but… but how do you know that– ARCHIVIST: I just do. I just know it. [SILENCE] [SHUFFLING] MARTIN: You’ve been knowing a lot lately. ARCHIVIST: … Yes. MARTIN: A lot more than you used to. ARCHIVIST: Y… [SIGH] Yeah. And it, it feels more… deliberate. L–like I have more control now. MARTIN: Okay. So… how much can you see? What else do you know? ARCHIVIST: Uh… Maybe everything…! MARTIN: What’d you mean, “everything”? ARCHIVIST: I don’t… Ask me a question. O–one I can’t… possibly know already. […] HELEN: Hello, Jon! [FOOTSTEPS] [THE DOOR CREAKS CLOSE] ARCHIVIST: [INHALE] How did you find us? HELEN: Oh! I thought you’d know everything by this point. […] And please: my name is “Helen”. ARCHIVIST: Like you said, I can know everything now. Including how much of a lie that really is. HELEN: Don’t mistake “complication” for “falsehood”, dear Archivist.

(MAG166) HELEN: We’re all here, Martin. The Stranger; The Buried; The Desolation; all of us. But The Eye still rules. All this fear is being performed for its benefit. And so, there are now exactly two roles available in this new world of ours: the watcher, and the watched. Subject, and object. Those who are feared, and those who are afraid. And Jon, well… he is part of The Eye; a very important part. And he’s able to, shall we say… shift its focus. Turn the one into the other. And for those of us whose very existence relies on being feared, well… To be turned into a victim destroys us utterly. And very, very painfully.

Sure, Jon needs to “pour out” into the tapes when they’re near a domain, but it takes fifteen minutes and it is done. He has a way to fix that discomfort.

So: yes, not responsible. But I still needed him to feel guilt about it, to feel ill-at-ease with his status as an “observer” (especially the outburst about being a “fucking tourist”: because YES, it’s extremely uncomfortable to hear him narrate these pockets of people’s suffering so he himself can feel better, untouched by it, lightly bantering with Martin?), to still reject his own enjoyment because he continues to cling to a moral compass (inflicting pain, even on a monster, shouldn’t feel good and satisfying), to be afraid of what he can do with his powers. Helen was right that “guilt” and “sadness” alone didn’t prevent Jon from doing terrible things last season (he felt guilty about attacking people, yet still concealed it, still clung to the hope that it wasn’t really him doing that… and did nothing to prevent further victims. There should have been only one victim of it at most, not five); but in that situation, it was also guilt and disgust that prevented him from embracing it like Helen had done, and from just accepting it as his new reality. Guilt, grief and sadness are not ideal, sure, but what would be the alternative? Indifference?

- ;; Really glad that Jon is not happy about what he did to the Not!Them and what it implied, because the circumstances in which he did… were terrifying.

* Jon had just established to Martin that the Not!Them couldn’t reach them, could only taunt, that it was stuck in a situation it hated, “ruled by The Eye”. It wasn’t a threat to them.

* Jon didn’t use his powers against it because it was hurting innocents – Jon turned against it because it was taunting him about Sasha. Jon did out of an outburst of flaring anger, disregarding everything else (and might have made its victims’ situation even worse, since the carousel was creaking in a dangerous-sounding way when they ran off).

* It was a personal revenge and Jon… spent half of season 4 with Daisy. Jon knows intimately how personal revenge and killing monsters tend to turn you into a monster, how it’s never-ending, how you can’t both be judge and executioner. (Adelard Dekker feels like he managed to navigate well-enough in that, but: we saw him tracking monsters when and while they were hurting innocents. He was by no means perfect either: after all, he discussed his theories with Peter Lukas… while there was no way he didn’t know that Peter was a Lonely avatar, and Peter acknowledged that he was mostly left alone (ha) because he was staying in his lane. That still involved sacrificing innocents.)

* Jon directly invoked Beholding when killing the Not!Them, used his connection to The Eye to do it. If the “feeding what feeds you” logic still applies: yes, on the one hand, it means that people’s suffering (from the Not!Them) fed The Eye, and Jon used it back against the Not!Them to exterminate it. On the other hand: still feeding the Fear-machine, still using the system, still feeding The Eye, given how it delights in overall suffering no matter the source.

* There is something very concerning about the fact that The Eye wanted Jon to leave the cabin in the first place (MAG162: “This place wishes to be our tomb. But The Eye does not wish that. No. [STATIC INCREASES] The Eye wishes instead that it be my chrysalis. It is time that I emerge…”), so it’s probably benefitting from what he’s doing… right now.

- I wonder if we’ll get something concrete about The Archivist’s connection to The Eye, since it’s been mentioned multiple times that that title has a special status when it comes to being connected to the Fears:

(MAG079) NOT!SASHA: I wonder, if I wear you, will I really become the Archivist? Rob The Eye of its pupil? Probably not. Better to just kill you, I think. Yes… I think that would be best.

(MAG120) ELIAS: And at last, the Archivist looks up. [STATIC INTENSIFIES] At last, he looks into The Eye that sees all, and knows all, and clutches at the secret terrors of your heart. The Ceaseless Watcher of all that is, and all that was; the voracious, infinite hunger that tears at his soul, invoking him to discover, to observe, to experience all and everything and forever. It stares into him, and it stares out of him, and he is falling into the devouring eternity of its pupil. He wants to cry out in horror, but he cannot. He. is. whole.

(MAG161) ARCHIVIST: They… I see most of the suffering around here. When it’s quiet, it just… it’s like… I can see it, like I’m watching all of it. MARTIN: You haven’t been opening the curtains? ARCHIVIST: No, I don’t need to. “It” can see us here, and… [WOODEN CREAKING SOUND] And I can see out as well.

(MAG166) HELEN: And Jon, well… he is part of The Eye; a very important part. And he’s able to, shall we say… shift its focus. Turn the one into the other. And for those of us whose very existence relies on being feared, well… To be turned into a victim destroys us utterly. And very, very painfully.

- I’m not really surprised at Martin thinking that killing the Not!Them was not that bad and that they could keep doing that, since he… wasn’t against violence himself when confronting monsters: Tim had to discourage him when facing Michael, Martin burned statements to get Elias to focus on him; Martin wasn’t against killing Jonah’s real body per se in MAG158 either, he just didn’t want to participate in Elias and Peter’s game (unaware that sparing Jonah was, incidentally, making Jonah win). That last one might have made it worse for him, since killing Jonah might have killed a lot of Institute members… but he and Jon would probably have survived, and the apocalypse would have been avoided. It’s possible that Martin might be especially down for violence right now if he feels like it might fix things or make them less bad? Since the beginning of the season, he’s been occasionally down for it (at least in theory):

(MAG162) ARCHIVIST: No, no, lo–look… I, I–I was listening, and I–I was filled with this… hatred. This anger; I–I wanted to leave, and hunt down Elias, a–and…! MARTIN: W–wow, okay… […] So should we… destroy it, before we go? [WOODEN CREAKING SOUND, BUT LOUDER AND CONFRONTATIONAL] [DISTANT RUMBLE OF THUNDER] ARCHIVIST: I honestly don’t know if we can. MARTIN: Hm. ARCHIVIST: Besides, there’s… far worse out there. Better to try and avoid it, I think. MARTIN: We’re not even gonna try? We, we’ve got your lighter, maybe we could just– ARCHIVIST: We can’t fight the world, Martin. MARTIN: [AMUSED DEFIANT HUFF] Says you. ARCHIVIST: [WITH A SMILE] Let’s go.

(MAG165) ARCHIVIST: [PANTS] MARTIN: … Whoa–oh–oh! ARCHIVIST: I, uh… MARTIN: What was that?! ARCHIVIST: … I–I destroyed it. [ECHOING CREAKING SOUNDS] Ki–killed her.

(MAG166) MARTIN: [LONG EXHALE] [SILENCE] … No; no, I actually think you’re good on that front. ARCHIVIST: … What? MARTIN: Yeah, I, I–I think we should go for it, get our murder on. ARCHIVIST: Sorry, what?! HELEN: [DELIGHTED] Yes, Martin! MARTIN: Thi–this isn’t like it it was before! We’re not talking about… innocent bystanders in cafes here, Jon; these things are… th–they’re just evil. Plain and simple; and right now they’re torturing and tormenting everyone! If you want to stop them and have the power to, then… then, then yeah, let’s do it, let’s go full Kill Bill!

… possible because he wasn’t around Jon during season 4. Jon saw that the lines were blurrier than he wanted to think: since Jane was “afraid” when she gave her statement, since The Hive was probably still (partially) her, when did she become a monster? Jon has been wronged by so many people – but what about Daisy, who confessed that she had wanted to kill him for months, and who apologised and developed a genuine friendship with him after the Coffin? How could Jon decide who “deserves” to die and who doesn't, if his personal feelings are the only judge? We spent part of season 3 and a good amount of season 4 focusing on avatars’ trajectories, how they arrived at their current situation; at which point is a human’s turning into an avatar not “simply” being pressed by their circumstances and when do you become guilty of truly “serving” and benefitting from the Fear-machinery? Echoing the episode’s statement: wouldn’t Richard have every right to seek revenge and murder on Sam, since Sam butchered him? If Jon’s own victims were to declare that he should die, wouldn’t it be their right, since he wronged them and was a “monster” to them, following the same logic? And moreover, Jon knows, first-hand, that his own powers were dependant on his feeding from people: these are not clean powers, these are a direct result of other people’s pain. Martin’s situation regarding the fears has been different: when we saw him using Lonely powers to avoid Georgie, it didn’t seem to have cost something to anyone else than himself. And Martin’s overall way of dealing with monsters/avatars, unless he was overpowered, was to make out the best with whatever power he was given (like using Peter’s knowledge to leak what info he was gathering to Jon&co). What I’m concerned about is that Martin is absolutely failing at taking Jon’s discomfort into account: it’s already there, and it was obvious that Martin wasn’t convincing him. So. Could very well develop into full-blown conflict, or, at least, put a strain on Jon’s desire to confide to him (since Jon sounded… a bit out of it/almost sulking between Helen’s departure and the beginning of the statement? Martin, the fact that Helen was super-excited about what you said is a big indicator that NOP, you don’t want to encourage or enable Jon’s potential for violence ;;)

- I’m still ;; worried about this bit Jon said, starting the season:

(MAG161) MARTIN: It just… It hurts me to see you wallowing, like this. ARCHIVIST: [SHARPLY] Well, some of us weren’t able to cut ourselves off from the world before it ended. [WOODEN CREAKING SOUND] MARTIN: That’s not fair. [SILENCE] ARCHIVIST: [SOFTER] No, it’s not, I’m, I’m sorry, I just… [RUSTLING OF CLOTHES] [INHALE, EXHALE] It hurts.

“some of us weren’t able to cut ourselves off from the world before it ended” seemed extremely heavy back then, so… I’m still thinking that it might have been a reference to his Lonely-isation and that there are still lingering consequences as of now? A lot of Martin’s interaction with his surroundings outside of Jon still sounds extremely performative to me:

(MAG163) MARTIN: Good. Good. [SILENCE PUNCTUATED BY PANTING] … J–J–Jon, Jon, w–we’re not alone. ARCHIVIST: I–ignore them, they’re not… Just ignore them. MARTIN: … They’re not… real? [VOICES SHOUTING IN THE DISTANCE] ARCHIVIST: [MIRTHLESS CHUCKLING] No…! They’re real; they were… normal people before the– … Before me. But now they’re here, meat for the grinder. I just mean there’s no point… talking to them. MARTIN: Don’t be a prick, Jon. Hey! I’m, I’m sorry about him. He’s–he’s going through a lot – well… we all are, I suppose, but well… “Hi”, I guess. [SILENCE] Hello? ARCHIVIST: They won’t hear you, Martin, they’re all… too busy waiting to die. MARTIN: Jon… […] It’s dangerous. Could… get yourself blown up, like all these poor… [PLASTIC RATTLING] Who d’you think they were? Really don’t see why we can’t just… go round, picked a better place to… [STEPS THROUGH LIQUID] [SIGH] I guess there… aren’t really any “better” places anymore, are there? [STEPS THROUGH LIQUID] It’s all this. Or worse, or… or different.

(MAG165) MARTIN: Hm! [SILENCE] D’you think we could get that experience just… walking along the edge? Because, uh… [LOWER] I really don’t like the look of those riders. ARCHIVIST: Would you believe me if I said they were the victims? MARTIN: … At this point, I’m not even surprised. […] Well, did it stir any feeling in you? ARCHIVIST: Yes! “Nausea”. Because of the horrible things in it! MARTIN: That’s not quite what I meant. […] I kinda want to *hear* that tape now, see how artistic The Stranger actually is. ARCHIVIST: Or just look up. [SIGH] See it for yourself. MARTIN: Uh… Hm. No. No thanks. Trying to avoid thinking about it, actually.

(MAG166) MARTIN: [SIGH] [SILENCE] [BAG JOSTLING] … Kind of wish the apocalypse had some magazines. … A–ac–actually, no, second thoughts, probably not. Mmh! Def, definitely not. [BAG JOSTLING] [SIGH] Come on Jon…! How long does it take to describe… “scary mud”… [STATIC] [LOUDER, CLOSER HOWLS] [GASP] Oh, o–okay – okay, okay, sorry, sorry! Sorry.

(Before, I would have said that Martin would have accepted it if Jon wanted to sacrifice himself in order to save the world. Lately, I’m thinking more and more that he could be ready to leave the world to rot if it means keeping Jon alive/safe.)

- Regarding Helen’s binary:

(MAG166) HELEN: And so, there are now exactly two roles available in this new world of ours: the watcher, and the watched. Subject, and object. Those who are feared, and those who are *afraid*. And Jon, well… he is part of The Eye; a very important part. And he’s able to, shall we say… shift its focus. Turn the one into the other. And for those of us whose very existence relies on being feared, well… To be turned into a victim destroys us utterly. And very, very painfully.

… Where does that put Martin?

Where does it put Basira, if she’s tracking Daisy?

Melanie&Georgie, given how Georgie doesn’t feel fear anymore and Melanie is out of the Watcher’s grasp?

(And if Jon can turn one into the other, does it mean that he could technically turn a victim into something that is feared?)

- I’m also pondering about the denunciation of the Fear-system because. The idea is that, amongst the humans, there is no winner. I’m not sure I absolutely trust Helen when she classified beings between “those who are feared and those who are afraid” given how such a huge amount of turned-avatars (so, those who are now feared) were initially motivated by their own feelings of fear… including Jonah. There have been a few mentions of him since the start of the season, setting him up as The Big Bad, and! Obviously! Why wouldn’t he be! He is the worst! He killed, manipulated and engineered other people’s suffering for his own safety! He was the one destroying the world for his own benefit!

(MAG161) MARTIN: [SIGH] Gloating, Jon. [CREAKING SOUND] Elias won, and there were some tapes he’d kept for himself, and he wanted to gloat. So, he sent them! ARCHIVIST: He’s not… MARTIN: I–I don’t see– ARCHIVIST: … “Elias”. MARTIN: Jonah, then. I don’t know, I find it hard to think of him as… I don’t really like to think of him!

(MAG162) ARCHIVIST: “This place wishes to be our tomb. But The Eye does not wish that. No. [STATIC INCREASES] The Eye wishes instead that it be my chrysalis. [WOODEN CREAKING SOUND] It is time that I emerge…” [STATIC REACHING A PEAK] [CRIES OUT] [COLLAPSES] […] MARTIN: Look, Jon, I… I, I know it hurts, but you’ve just got to… ARCHIVIST: No, no, lo–look… I, I–I was listening, and I–I was filled with this… hatred. This anger; I–I wanted to leave, and hunt down Elias, a–and…! MARTIN: W–wow, okay… ARCHIVIST: But, when I thought it… the–there was… [WOODEN CREAKING SOUND] There was something else. Th–this place, it… it didn’t want me, it… [WOODEN CREAKING SOUND] didn’t want us to go. […] MARTIN: Do you think it’ll do anything? Confronting Elias? ARCHIVIST: [INHALE] I… [SIGH] Maybe?

(MAG164) MARTIN: What about Elias? [STATIC INCREASES] ARCHIVIST: He’s inside the Panopticon; the tower, far above the world. MARTIN: That one? ARCHIVIST: Yes. [PAUSE] MARTIN: How is he? ARCHIVIST: Hard to say. The, the way this works, this… “new sight”, the knowledge is, is… [SIGH] It’s somehow wrapped up in the Panopticon? An eye can’t… see inside itself. MARTIN: Mm. ARCHIVIST: But I can feel him in there. MARTIN: Hm. That sounds… gross. ARCHIVIST: It is! [CHUCKLES]

(MAG166) HELEN: It’s very satisfying though, isn’t it? Teasing out vague information; you see why Elias got a kick out of it. ARCHIVIST: Shut up! MARTIN: Jon…!

But I’m also wondering: at which point during the 19th century did it turn out that he was “rotten”? His actions went from someone afraid that others could ruin the world and condemn him (and others) to eternal suffering, to seeking to end the world himself in order to ensure him a better spot? He didn’t create the Fears, they already existed – the Fear machine already existed before him.

I don’t know how to explain, but I’m less and less confident that he’s good and fine in the Panopticon at the moment? And given Jon’s shame regarding the Not!Them, not sure either that Jon… is meant to smite him too, or to feel any catharsis in the process if he does?

(It’s a weird thing to say, but I get the impression that if you want to make someone like Jonah crumble, you don’t really have to deal with him as a Worthy Opponent and a master manipulator in control of the situation; you have to look down on him and shatter his ego by telling him “I forgive you; you, too, were just a pathetic tool manipulated by Fears, after all.”)

(- Am squinting a bit about the “We’re not talking about… innocent bystanders in cafes here, Jon” mention since: yes, it would make sense that this would come to Martin’s mind, since he took Jess Tyrell’s complaint. But it could also be a narrative reminder that this thing happened, because they’ll cross the path of one of Jon’s victims again soon?)

- SQUINT about Helen being assumedly oh-so-very-busy and yet hovering around the boys so much, and saying she is delighted about the new world… when the Not!Them made it clear that it was still feeling the pressure of The Eye. Could be because The Stranger and The Eye were kind of opposites on the spectrum (Dark avatars might not be pleased either) but HUMMM.

(MAG164) ARCHIVIST: What – do – you – want. HELEN: To be friends again! All three of us! ARCHIVIST: [AGGRAVATED SIGH] HELEN: Look at this place, look at this… [DEEP INHALE] wonderland! This is the world now, and we are strong and free! There’s really no reason for us not to hang out. [SILENCE] [SCOFF] Goodness, he is in a mood. Has he been like this the whole time? […] Anyway. Sorry to love you and leave you, but I must dash. It’s a very busy time for me, lots of things to do, people to… well. You know! ARCHIVIST: I don’t doubt it. [SILENCE] MARTIN: … What? HELEN: Just… taking a moment to look. You two are just such an adorable couple! ARCHIVIST: Enough! [THE DOOR CREAKS OPEN] HELEN: See you soon!

(MAG166) ARCHIVIST: Don’t get too close. [THE DOOR CREAKS OPEN] [DISTORTION’S STATIC] Hello, Helen. HELEN: Oh, hello! [FOOTSTEPS] In a better mood, are we? Feeling more secure now you’ve learned how to kill~?

Helen. Do you have a genuine death/destruction wish that you’re trying to hide / can’t reveal because that would be too straightforward? How come you’re not trapped in a pocket nightmare either, but coming and going like this?

- cRIES and pours one out for Tim, as Martin is taking on the mantle of pop-culture references:

(MAG040) TIM: There were loads of them. Some jumped at me as I ran inside so I dodged out the way, but ended up sprawling into this pile of boxes that I thought were case files. Instead, I found myself lying on top of a whole bunch of CO2 canisters – which are damn hard by the way. The worms were still coming, so I used them. I mean, I went full Gas-Rambo.

(MAG116) ARCHIVIST: Do you– … Are you going to keep it together? TIM: Look. If you’re worried I’m gonna go all… Redrum and start hacking off random waxworks, don’t be. I’m not gonna give us away. I want this to work.

(MAG166) MARTIN: Thi–this isn’t like it it was before! We’re not talking about… innocent bystanders in cafes here, Jon; these things are… th–they’re just evil. Plain and simple; and right now they’re torturing and tormenting everyone! If you want to stop them and have the power to, then… then, then yeah, let’s do it, let’s go full Kill Bill! ARCHIVIST: [LOW] I, I, I haven’t seen it…

(eisduje not surprise at all for Jon but also HIGHFIVE I haven’t seen it either.)

- Martin had said that he would answer the phone ;;

(MAG163) MARTIN: Uh… Jon? [OLD PHONE RINGING] Uh, Jo–Jon, the, uh, the payphone that’s… here, for some reason, it’s–it’s ringing? [OLD PHONE RINGING] Jon, is–is that… [ASKING AROUND] I–is anyone gonna get that? [OLD PHONE RINGING] … Unless it’s for me? [OLD PHONE RINGING] [SIGH] Yeah, it’s for me. Uh… nnno. [OLD PHONE RINGING] N–no, no, I don’t think so, actually! Hum, thanks, but that, that sounds like a really… terrible idea! [OLD PHONE RINGING] Hm, sorry! [SILENCE] … Huh. Wwwell, alright then! [BODIES WADING THROUGH LIQUID] ARCHIVIST: Martin, you need to keep up. It’s not safe. … Martin? You okay? MARTIN: Uh, I… Th–ther–there was a phone – that phone. ARCHIVIST: … Oh. MARTIN: It… Yeah, it was ringing? ARCHIVIST: Oh. Right… Did you answer it? MARTIN: No. ARCHIVIST: Hm. [INHALE] Probably for the best…! MARTIN: Yeeaahh.

(MAG164) MARTIN: Okay, okay, uh, what else, what else, hum… Oh! Hum, uh, who was, uh–uh, phone – hum, wh–who was calling me? [STATIC INCREASES] ARCHIVIST: … I think it was Annabelle Cane. MARTIN: Hm. ARCHIVIST: That’s… weird, I, I know The Web was wrapped around that phone, but, but I can’t… see her. A–at all. At least with Georgie and Melanie, I have a vague sense they’re still alive, i–in London, and, or– Well, what was London. [STATIC DECREASES] But Annabelle…? Nothing. [STATIC FADES] Hm. MARTIN: W–well, I’ll… I’ll ask her, next time she calls. ARCHIVIST: Well, I know that’s a bad idea…! MARTIN: What, do you? ARCHIVIST: … Okay, no, that one was a… very reasonable guess. MARTIN: Ha!

(MAG166) [MUFFLED BUZZING] MARTIN: … Oh, god, what now? [FOOTSTEPS] [MUFFLED BUZZING] [FOOTSTEPS] What, seriously? A spade? [MUFFLED BUZZING] Isn’t that like kind of… I don’t know, insensitive? Given where you are? [MUFFLED BUZZING] [SIGH] Fine, fine! Fine. [BAG JOSTLING] [SIGH] [SHARP METALLIC SOUND] [EARTH BEING DUG UP] [MUFFLED BUZZING] [NOKIA RINGTONE, MUFFLED] [MUFFLED BUZZING] MARTIN: For God’s sake…! [WIPING HIS HANDS] [NOKIA RINGTONE, CLEARER] [MUFFLED BUZZING] [BAG JOSTLING] [BEEP] MARTIN: Hello? ANNABELLE: Hello? Is that Martin? MARTIN: Don’t do that. ANNABELLE: What? No stomach for games? MARTIN: Well, your “games” aren’t exactly fun for everyone, are they? ANNABELLE: Very few games are…! MARTIN: [SIGH] Look, look, look, I’m talking to Annabelle Cane, right?

* SOB because in his conversation with Jon in MAG164… he say that he would answer, but I’m pretty sure that Jon took it as a joke, and didn’t think that Martin truly WOULD.

* The irony of Martin having to DIG with a SHOVEL, when he had been the one to read that statement in season 3. (Was it a genuine coincidence, or a nudgenudge from Annabelle implying that she was already watching him back then?)

* Laughing really hard because OF COURSE, a Nokia would survive the apocalypse. (Francisco Tárrega’s “Gran Vals”, recognisable despite the years!)

- I. really. wasn’t. expecting. to hear Annabelle so soon and so casually. To just speak over the phone.

I’m amused, because her conversation with Martin reminded me a LOT of my first impressions of Elias in MAG017: I was already spoiled that he was a big bad, and yet, he had struck me as non-threatening and boring? But I’ve Learned, so I obviously don’t trust, but I’m still “!” that I’m getting the same impression with Annabelle right now.

(Also, it’s very funny that Jon gave her such a carnivorous edge while reading her statement in MAG147 and she… felt almost chill and courteous here.)

- Obvious squinting that she didn’t say who she was:

(MAG166) MARTIN: [SIGH] Look, look, look, I’m talking to Annabelle Cane, right? ANNABELLE: You never gave me your name – so why should I offer mine?

If she hadn’t been credited as “Annabelle Cane”, I would have seriously doubted it was really her, but there were the credits. Still, squinting a bit? (And squinting a bit at how she teased Martin: was it a jab at his non-existent middle name, furthering that she was keeping a close eye (ha) on Jon&Martin?)

- I!! Don’t know!! What!! To!! Think!! Of her call!!

(MAG166) MARTIN: Just, what do you want? ANNABELLE: *I* want to help you, of course. [SILENCE] MARTIN: … No. Thank you. ANNABELLE: It’s a hard place to find yourself in, maybe I can be of some… assistance…! MARTIN: You can assist me by giving the… “creepy phone” thing a rest…! ANNABELLE: He is more powerful here than he’s ever been, isn’t he? [PAUSE] And you’re not sure what that means for you. MARTIN: [INHALE] I’m hanging up now. ANNABELLE: Does he even need you at all?

And that’s the most Web thing, isn’t it? Making you unsure whether she’s trying to manipulate or is just saying random things, and which direction she is pointing towards? Why dig at Martin’s potential insecurities regarding Jon not needing him? Is it to plant a seed of doubt, like what had happened to Agnes (MAG139: “A tiny… hairline fracture, which destroys everything.”)? Technically, Jon “needing” Martin was already a point covered with MAG159 when Jon got him out of The Lonely’s influence: Jon did say he needing him, but he also did bigger, he chose Martin (and made Martin see “him”). Which doesn’t invalidate the possiblity that right now, it could be hurting Martin, given that… he was used to act as a caretaker for so long, and Jon is absolutely in charge at the moment. Is Annabelle trying to get Martin to take risks? Is it to alienate them from each other? A few possibilities:

* It’s for shits&giggles, she was mostly introducing herself for later but didn’t need any particular reaction out of Jon & Martin at the moment (but hey, free snack).

* She needs them to go their separate ways for some reason and is stirring up conflict to make that happen; whether it’s to prevent them from reaching the Panopticon, or because she needs them elsewhere. Saying it outright would make Jon categorically refuse because it’s The Web, so she’s using a roundabout.

* She… is preparing them for The Lonely-zone, making sure that insecurities/potential sources of conflicts are worked out NOW and not later, to up their chances of making it to the Panopticon?

Right now, I’m anticipating Martin’s reactions: will he hide the phone conversation from Jon? Will he share what happened, what was said? Has he kept the phone? Will Martin try to “fix” the problem by taking unnecessary risks…?

(- WOW, ANNABELLE IS VERY GOOD AT TIMING HER PHONE CALLS FOR WHEN JON IS AWAY, ISN’T SHE. HOW FUNNY THAT BOTH TIMES SHE CALLED, THE RECORDER HAD CLICKED ON AND SHOWN THAT MARTIN WAS ALONE ALREADY, BEFORE THE PHONE RANG.)

… It feels extremely weird to realise that “next episode is MAG167”. 7th episode already; last season, it was the equivalent of “Remains To Be Seen” (do you sometimes just Think about Dr Jonathan Fanshawe and his vitriolic letter). So little has happened, and yet… already quite a few things? I feel like we learned things about past (and dead) characters this season, mostly; a few things have been installed (Helen visiting Jon&Martin, the Distortion’s corridors set up to be relevant; Annabelle finally revealing herself; Jon’s new activity of “pouring” into the tape recorders; the current goal of reaching the Panopticon requiring to “metaphorically” experience the Fears and witnessing their domains; Jon’s status as The Eye’s favoured son and/or an extension of it; Georgie&Melanie’s status being conspicuously unclear; Basira still after monster!Daisy; Jonah still at the Panopticon; the hints about setting the building on fire; the fact that there is a faint hope of undoing the apocalypse, altogether with it being complicated), but since MAG163, the series has mostly been following a new formula without much new things happening to Jon&Martin themselves? Season 4 was the outlier in that regard.

Anyway: season 5’s titles make the content harder to guess, though they make sense in retrospect, and MAG167 feels the same! No strong conviction but potential ideas: Vast (because space reference + something about the drive); I saw someone suggest a potential connection with Daisy (and! It would be a clever one) so could be Hunt, with monster!Daisy and Basira at the end…; Flesh (am thinking about something Jared said); Spiral (because kind of how the Distortion works); Beholding, and specifically OG!Elias somehow (have we listened to all the tapes Jon&Martin had received?). I see how there could be a connection to that too, so potentially a glimpse of Georgie&Melanie (and The Admiral)?

#the magnus archives #tma season 5 #mag166 #long post/#tma spoilers/#tma liveblog

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nola-unchained · 5 years

Photo

STATS

Name: Abigail Avalos-Barrera Gender/pronouns: She/her Age: 32 Species: witch Occupation: Journalist / Part Time Healer Faceclaim: Diane Guerrero

HISTORY:

There exist a strange phenomenon even in this demimonde, a curious occurrence born within the bones of the Avalos-Barrera women. They are each of them powerful creatures for more reasons than one. Magic saturates their blood, envelops flesh and bone weaving itself into all that they are stretching back into the beginning. A multi-generational collection of the extraordinarily gifted, mothers, sisters, and daughters all bound by blood and the title of family. Gifted as they are, as strong and resilient as women, they are incredibly so, what beats inside their chest is a miraculous wonder. That muscle buried in that cavity is what makes these witches who have existed to protect, heal, and act as guardians - that little thing is the source of their humanity. That is what makes those supernatural women even closer to their human cousins in a way few embraces. It adds another level to their already ethereal and otherworldly nature. One cannot help but admire them - wonder about them how curious it is that they could remain as they are even in this day and age. Their matriarch and leader of their coven will tell you that perhaps it is because each generation of their women is stronger than the next capable of facing the rising odds. In broken English with bony and trembling fingers, she will point to one as the living example of this proposed theory. Leticia Avalos will gesture to her great-granddaughter, and when you hear the name Abigail Avalos-Barrera you almost immediately understand how true that statement is. When has there ever existed a soul quite like hers? Leticia will tell you its because Abigail is uniquely designed and capable of facing the day, but Abigail will say to you a slightly altered story. On a handful of accounts, Abigail will agree with Leticia, but the young woman doesn’t credit her magical capabilities or her strength of heart to having been born special. With a soft smile and raise of a sharp brow, Abby will tell you her power comes from the women who raised her. It comes from the people around her and the unique environment in which she was raised. No one is born knowing what sort of person they will be or the level of their respective talents - credit is due to the people who help each person become what they were always meant to be. Had any of the people who contributed to form her ideas of self and the world around her not been a part of her formative years, Abigail, with absolute certainty, wouldn’t be all that she is now.

That is not to say that Abigail wasn’t something else entirely as a child. Perhaps the reason Leticia believes her great-granddaughter is so special is because of the nature of her birth. Isabella Avalos loved passionately the man she married - soulmates they were, and Abigail’s father was a good man. Good men in New Orleans were very hard to find and, unfortunately, not easy to keep alive or corrupt. Isabella, her mother, and great grandmother have never told the story of how Rafael Barrera died, but the rest of their coven have always spoken highly of him. He died very bravely protecting another family - the sort of man who ran toward the danger - instead of away from it. Isabella was inconsolable, as it would seem until Tia Rosa and her visions spoke of the piece of Rafael still living. ‘You carry a precious piece of the one you love’ Tia Rosa spoke non-nonchalantly ‘I have seen it.’ It was not an easy pregnancy, but if it weren’t for the women who made up her family, who knows what would’ve happened. Thankfully - she was born happy, healthy, and with the strength of generations of women behind her to help raise her into maturity.

Things would not always go according to plan with as rapidly as Abby would come into her own. Especially the day she stole Cassidy Bolton’s heart. The two of them were small little things barely out of diapers when it happened. From that moment on, it didn’t seem as if there would ever be two more attached individuals in the world. It wasn’t uncommon at all for her family to wonder where she is and inquire next door to find her practicing her skills with Cassidy or sitting up talking about their grand escape to faraway places. There was nothing hidden between them; every plan the two had ever made they shared from college into the wild forever. The young woman was already practically a Bolton; the two were so close, eventually falling into dating at the young age of thirteen. At the time in her heart - Abigail Avalos-Barrera could’ve sworn she couldn’t even imagine life without him. Two years later. A positive pregnancy test would overturn every dream they’d had for each grand adventure they were to take. She was going to be a mother when most girls were having quinceaneras or planning sweet sixteens. Part of her couldn’t help but feel like she was holding them back, but she would never regret creating the most beautiful little boy. Aiden, as she would always come to tell her son, was and will always be the light of her life.

What two young parents weren’t aware of even if they had some idea of the commitment it would take that his arrival would be the beginning of the division between the two of them. The Avalos-Barrera women and the Bolton family were incredibly supportive before and after Aiden’s appearance but in a toxic combination of their age, sleepless nights, bills, and anything under the sun that could pose a problem Abigail fought tooth and nail with her most beloved. If it was not one issue, it was another, and when Abby pursued college, things came to a disastrous head. To this day, Abigail isn’t sure what spurred her on into another man’s arms. Perhaps it was the heat of the moment, and as emotional, as young mother was, there was no controlling the urge. Maybe it was because he was handsome? Perhaps she saw someone who was there - who wasn’t going to argue with her - who wanted her. No matter her flawed reasoning Abigail slept with another man. An argument for ending all disputes ensued, words were said one could never take back, and Cassidy found out what she had done. Abigail broke her first love’s heart, and to date, it remains the only thing she ever regrets doing. If only she knew what it would do to him. For Aiden’s sake, for the sake of the friendship, they’d always had the couple called it quits and agreed to split custody between the two of them.

Again while the world would turn on its head, New Orleans would serve eternally as the backdrop for the continuation of Abigail’s story things were different now. The one saving grace of their mutual break was that Cassidy loved her enough to keep her cheating to themselves. As beloved as Abigail always was - this bright shimmering star of incredible potential - he couldn’t ruin her like that. So when Cassidy fell into the ways that would ultimately lead all of them where they were today, Abigail had no right to tell him Riley was no good for him. To say to the man, it was a foolish mistake, but each of them dealt with the death of their romance in different ways. He partied and slept around in a downward spiral of debauchery and drugs. Abigail - Abigail devoted herself to Aiden and tried to breathe life into fractured fairytales and old dreams they’d planned for with his elder brother.

Always the artist soul, one who never saw the world like others did full of death and despair - kaleidoscope eyes desired to show others they way objects appeared to her. Traveling was out of the question. Aiden needed one parent to be firm and steadfast - she needed to stay the course and be a better person for her son. Abigail, then, began to prove just exactly what she was made of. To show great grandmother correctly that Abby had been made to weather the storm and shine brighter than ever before - respected and admired by almost everyone she met. Who could say they weren’t affected by the young mother’s determination and resilience to forge ahead and how there was always room in her heart to put the needs of others before herself. It didn’t stop Abigail from being flawed, from having human emotions and struggling in her way. No one claimed it would be easy to raise a boy who was just like his father or to pursue journalism and master an ancient craft all at the same time. No one would be able to tell her how many sleepless nights there were to come or the trials and tribulations there were to follow each new day. Tia Rosa’s gift wasn’t all it was cracked up to be anymore, and her predictions for the future were vague and in riddles most days. If not Tia Rosa’s puzzling prophecies, Great Grandmother Leticia’s declining health, or the score of other problems her family and coven encountered, there was still Cassidy. Her first everything and while the dynamic was different, she was still as there as one could be.

By this time, Aiden was well into being a teenager. He was driving, working, and dating several girls. Abigail was an incomparable healer and talented journalist for one of the major newspapers in the area. Despite ups and downs and fights, she found herself once again to Cassidy’s best friend. Close enough to be a surrogate mother figure to his other children. Abigail was close enough to see him fall in love with Cassandra. Abigail was there to see her first love genuinely fall in love. She’d always had a fondness for humans herself, and Abigail greatly admired the woman - it took a particular sort of person to capture Cass’ heart, and the Avalos-Barrera woman thoroughly approved of her. It stung a little due to her pride, but he wasn’t her love anymore, but he was her family, however forever and always. The other shoe then dropped, and Cassidy nearly died. If not for his mother’s magic, all of them would’ve lost a most irreplaceable being that night. More so than that, Tia Rosa’s visions turned more bizarre full of coming darkness and for the young woman who saw the world so differently - Abigail couldn’t help but believe dangerous times were ahead. Things have calmed now - if only slightly. Abigail expends herself ever consistently to help take care of those she loves and lend assistance where she can to take care of Cassidy’s other children. Part of her has the deepest desire to speak with Cassandra, and the other would love to knock Riley into the next century. It’s not the wisest thing to do - challenging an alpha werewolf or a woman who hasn’t had the most beautiful life experiences, but some days the saint of a woman would like to try. The gifted young witch, the powerful woman strong in heart and mind, grapples with decisions that could again change the world. If danger is on the horizon Abigail is afraid of all she is willing to do to protect the small slivers of peace they hold onto and just what lengths she’d prepared to ensure the safety of her family. A journalist can only wait for the story to break. An amateur photographer can only hold for the perfect shot. Most importantly of all, a gifted witch can only hope her magic is enough or that the draw to darker things isn’t strong enough to pull her from the light when the time comes. Only an Abby can be all these things as great grandmother whispers into the dark that it should be afraid of a strong heart.

PERSONALITY:

+ motherly, perspicacious, resilient, passionate

- opinionated, willful, overly protective, guarded

Abigail is played by Eden

#supernatural rp #mature rp #town rp #literate rp #new rp

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back-and-totheleft · 4 years

Text

A Journey Against a Raging Historical Backdrop

If there is anything the year 2020 has shaken into the very fabric of our imperial society, it’s that nothing ever goes according to plan, rarely is anything absolutely assured. While a biological threat has upended not only our nationalist pride as a world hegemony, it no doubt has uprooted many personal obsessions with career paths and lifestyle. That most provocative of American film directors, Oliver Stone, has now released a passionate and absorbing memoir, Chasing the Light: Writing, Directing, and Surviving Platoon, Midnight Express, Scarface, Salvador and the Movie Game, which in its own way, is fully apt for our time. More than any other work of autobiography to be released this summer, Stone’s account of going against the grain and demanding to be allowed to live off his vocation reads like a tonic.

For consumers of cinema, Stone remains a filmmaker eternally divisive. Whether it be his style, and above all, his politics, he inspires admiration and derision. He probably remains best known for his work from the ‘90s, especially the technical masterpiece JFK, which somehow collages every conspiracy theory surrounding the assassination of President John F. Kennedy, and Natural Born Killers, a visually anarchic satire crystalizing our American obsession with violence and celebrity. Agree with their theses or not, the fact that both films remain instant pop cultural reference points is a testament to their lasting value as art. I dare argue Stone’s 1995 opus Nixon, is a grossly underrated and vital drama unmatched by anything released since when it comes to cinematic political biography. This article could continue on and discuss Stone’s hallucinatory Jim Morrison biopic The Doors or his 1999 football epic Any Given Sunday, written and shot with the spirit of a Roman gladiator.

But Chasing the Light is powerful reading precisely because it is about those years before Stone reached Hollywood prominence. It is a book full of memories, self-doubt, stirring experiences and that ever so hard, grinding need to push oneself towards a stubborn goal. It helps that Stone is a natural born writer, chronicling his early years with a crisp, eloquent prose. But pulsing in nearly every space of subtext is a spirit of surviving by going against the grain. Stone even brushes aside the stale sugarcoating of other Hollywood biographies. He is blunt about sex, the personalities of others, and of course, his political opinions.

As evident in his work, Stone is obsessed with history and its lessons, the way it casts a shadow over our daily lives, whether we notice it or not. His book opens in 1976, as the U.S. celebrates it bicentennial and Stone stares out New York Harbor. Chapter one opens with a line recognizable to any dreamer without immediate resources, “I was coming up on thirty, and I was broke, but I didn’t want to think about that anymore.” The Statue of Liberty, the pomp of American Independence Day, even as the country was reeling from Vietnam, only adds to Stone’s sense of personal limbo. The narrative then shifts to a reverie going back to 1946, when Stone was born to Lou Stone and Jacqueline Goddet. Stone was himself a direct product of history. Lou was in General Eisenhower’s staff as a military man stationed in post-World War II France. Jacqueline was a French upper class girl who fell for the American G.I. fantasy. But like all dreams, the shores of reality provide a hard crash. Stone would be born into privilege, with Lou described as one of the last breed of Wall Street brokers still imbued with a slight sense of morality. He had lost it all before in the crash of 1929, but would lose more again. Sent off to boarding school, it was there that a young Stone would receive a blunt phone call informing him his parents were getting a divorce. In a swerve away from the typical image of 1950s America, Lou and Jacqueline were pretty blunt with young Oliver about their extramarital activities. On top of that, Lou was wallowing in debt.

It is this shattering of the ideal atomic family, white, affluent, basking in the delights of American capitalism, that seems to be the first real catalyst in the formation of Oliver Stone. In 1967, at the eve of turning 21, Stone is on his way to Vietnam after having enlisted. Here the rebel emerges, running from the plasticity and lies of the American privileged class, deciding on his own he wants to taste the real world. Raised in a conservative environment, Stone has little to say about the early cultural shocks of Elvis or the Beats, it simply wasn’t much a part of his world. What he does carry in him to war is a love for Homer, Greek mythology and its potent lessons. A Homeric view of combat, its bloody terror mixed with boredom, the cast of warriors in his platoon, would stay with Stone forever. This literary view sustains him as he returns to a country embroiled in radical cultural change.

If there is a romantic, almost Hemingway tone to the early sections of Chasing the Light, relatable to anyone who has ever felt like running away, even if it means to seek something greater in a tumultuous world, the second half of the book becomes one of the great recent testimonials of the struggling artist. What Stone knows from the beginning is that he is a writer. Words are his vocation. But after penning a failed, hallucinatory novel (later published in 1997 as A Child’s Night Dream), Stone realizes screenwriting is the new literary form of the age, because it is also an age of cinema. Books may never entirely go out of fashion, but the masses consume images, coupled with sound and music. This seemed to Stone, who confesses his mother would play hookie with him to see movies, like a better pathway to express the ideas and memories swirling in his intense psyche.

NYU would be where Stone would attend film school with Martin Scorsese as an instructor described as wonderfully manic and passionate. In the ‘70s a B.A. in had even less job market value than today, and Stone is soon driving cabs to survive, admitting that he wanted to avoid practical jobs as much as possible. Stone’s life reads like those classic, romantic authors of decades past, who would defy the norm, live in poverty and peck at their manuscripts. Stone eventually marries Najwa Sarkis, a Lebanese UN worker serving the Kingdom of Morocco. She provides Stone with a comfortable home as he writes scripts and treatments, and directs his first, low-budget feature, a horror film named Seizure. It fails, playing in a small grindhouse spot as a double bill in New York City. This is when Stone makes that difficult decision of again casting aside comfort, ending the marriage so he can move to Los Angeles with a script in hand based on his Vietnam experiences, Platoon. As Stone boards the plane for L.A., history both political and cultural blaze in the background. Apocalypse Now and The Deer Hunter are some of first cinematic attempts to grapple with Vietnam. Stone admires their scope, but they are obviously grandiose films made by directors who never fought in the war.

When Stone lands in the city of angels with its Hollywood promises, it is Platoon that gets him work. Through talent and stubbornness, Stone comes across as rather the lucky writer. His first major studio assignment, Midnight Express, based on a book by Billy Hayes, who was arrested and imprisoned in Turkey for smuggling hash, is for then emerging British director Alan Parker and becomes a smash hit, winning Stone his first Oscar for Best Adapted Screenplay. The passages describing the cocaine-fueled ambiance of the Golden Globes before they were a live broadcast show are hilariously decadent, as well as the party atmosphere of late ‘70s Hollywood. Stone vaguely recalls writer Gore Vidal attempting to seduce Mick Jagger at one gathering.

Some of the warmer passages in the book involve Stone meeting his second wife, Elizabeth Cox, a blonde Texan who Stone describes as everything he would have ever wanted in a partner at the time. One gets the feeling of Stone constantly battling between the search for domesticity and his own impulses to go further, experiment and search as a young writer. He wants to be both loved and a libertine. He’s also a collaborative type of partner, giving Elizabeth a speaking role in his second feature, the box office bomb The Hand, which like Seizure, has not aged terribly and retains an eerie psychological force. When acting is not Elizabeth’s calling, Stone hires her as his typist.

Yet even as Stone basks in both the bacchanalia of the times and a loving relationship, developing a dangerous coke habit along the way, he writes every single day and manages to put his stamp on projects that would later be remolded by other filmmakers. Stone includes pages from his early drafts of Conan the Barbarian, which read like a Wagnerian fever dream. There’s still a sting of regret in the way he describes macho director John Milius taking the script and cutting it down to more of a B-movie romp to show off Arnold Schwarzenegger. The colder, by Stone’s observation slower, Brian De Palma would provide a better learning experience however, when Stone is hired to write the enduring cult classic Scarface. The infamously violent update of the 1932 Howard Hawks classic, starring Al Pacino as a Cuban refugee rising in the cartel world of 1980s Miami, would bring Stone into contact with underworld elements. There’s a darkly fun moment where he recounts meeting with Colombian gangsters and then unwisely dropping the name of a certain lawyer.

Through Scarface and other projects, Stone vividly remembers all the characters, some endearing and others downright venal, one encounters along the way of attempting success in this field where creativity and greed are nearly Siamese twins. What is eternally admirable about Stone is that he refuses to sell out. Even when slammed as overly violent or on the nose, preachy and despairing in his work, Stone’s voice is his own. He reserves low-grade acid in his prose for New Yorker critic Pauline Kael, who would write with a condescending, almost pathologically obsessive hatred for Stone’s scripts. And history is always in the background. The loose ‘70s would give way to the ultra-capitalist, hyper nationalist Reagan ‘80s. At one point Stone was even offered the chance to write Top Gun, still seen as a defining example of the post-Vietnam, macho American military movie meant to stir hearts to Uncle Sam’s marching call.

It would be history that would come and save Stone as well. Disappointed in the way the system seems to use writers as nothing more than hired hands, yearning to direct but having burned bridges in his wilder days, Stone puts it all on the line to make an independent war movie about the then raging civil war in El Salvador. Based on the experiences of wild man journalist Richard Boyle (who provides page after page of colorful anecdotes in the book’s latter half), Stone’s movie stars James Woods as Boyle and Elpidia Carrillo as the young Salvadoran peasant he loves. Outrageous, bloody, with a Hunter S. Thompson tone, Salvador has a making of story as intriguing as the movie. Nothing can stop the hungry director whose time has come. Stone tries to shoot in El Salvador itself amid the war, meeting with fascist military figures with Boyle. When that falls apart the production moves to Mexico as producers sweat over depleting funds. Yet Salvador opens the door for Stone to make his beloved Platoon, casting an unknown Charlie Sheen in the role based on himself. It’s quite the shift from capturing war in Central America to then reliving his memories from Vietnam, in a powerful opus featuring Willem Dafoe and Tom Berenger as well, both embodying figures Stone remembers from his days in combat.

Both Salvador and Platoon not only close the book victoriously, as one becomes a sleeper hit and the other a box office sensation that would win Best Picture and Director Oscars for Stone, they also crystalize the historical obsession that defines his journey. Like few, if any, movies made about Latin America since, Salvador is about a war in which the United States intervened to prevent revolutionary forces from overcoming a local regime and aristocracy firmly beholden to U.S. interests, and Platoon is about Stone having been a young man holding the rifle used by American power to impose its order on the world. He has been an agent of history, which is why it haunts his mind even now with his recent documentaries, the most controversial being a sit-down with Vladimir Putin.

Chasing the Light is like a tonic in these times when the world becomes increasingly unsettled, as if hurtling towards major conflagrations but our movies are now devoid of radical politics or even political passion, with a few exceptions. Great directors who begin with promise then get lured by the bigger system, and they end up contributing to the “Marvel Cinematic Universe.” Agree with him or not, Stone at least celebrates two things in this book we can all agree on: The hard work wanting to write demands, both in commitment and honing of the craft, and the need to engage with the wider world. Film obsessives and Stone’s fans will no doubt eagerly await the next volume, I know I will, when he will surely explore his defining political films. For now, Chasing the Light is a volume to give comfort to wandering talent out there, writing deep into the night, wondering if anyone will ever read it or care.

-Alci Rengifo, “Oliver Stone’s Chasing the Light Chronicles the Great Director’s Journey Against a Raging Historical Backdrop,” Riot Material, Sept 3 2020 [x]

#oliver stone #chasing the light #books #reviews #riot material

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upalldown · 4 years

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Sufjan Stevens - The Ascension

Eighth full-length album and first in five years from the Detroit-born indie folk singer-songwriter

9/13

Indie wunderkind Sufjan Stevens is an extraordinarily prolific artist. Since his outstanding 2015 album, Carrie and Lowell he has released three collaborative instrumental albums, received an Oscar nomination for “Mystery of Love” his song for the movie “ Call Me By Your Name” and released a number of singles. On September 25th, Stevens releases his eighth studio album, The Ascension. The release offers 15 tracks and a 16 pg booklet of drawings and the cover art by Stevens, which leads admirers to question if he ever sleeps.

On The Ascension Stevens takes us on another thought-provoking journey. In contrast to Carrie and Lowell where he attempted to come to grips with his personal grief and childhood after losing his long time estranged mother, on The Ascension Stevens is looking to gain an understanding of the randomness of fate and finding an answer to his crisis of faith. However, this dilemma is not only a crisis of religious faith but additionally with his faith in society and mankind. The release is personal turned universal. Fearlessly Stevens once again takes on big topics. He shines as he processes his experiences and offers up his unique sonics to reveal his innermost fears and ideas. His goal throughout the release is to provide the listener with an opportunity to think about and the question of who they believe in and do they deserve that trust. So a light-hearted listen it is not.

The album begins with “Make Me an Offer I Cannot Refuse” a midtempo offering loaded with Stevens’ layered ethereal vocals, and computer-generated glitchy sinuousness. This song seems like the culmination of Steven’s work on Planetarium and Aporia. The ever-expanding atmospheric sonic environment he creates provides the platform to question how we are blinded by greed and unquestioned acceptance. He notes society is often too willing to give up what is important to attain nothing much. The selection sets up the following tracks skillfully.

“Run Away With Me” is not as dark with sunlit almost hallucinogenic sonics. The track begins as a love song about two lovers escaping this world. Midway through the narrative switches over utilizing religious imagery, Stevens is frequently fond of using. Here he questions whether blind faith will completely sustain and remedy the world’s woes. The track lingers with the listener long after it is finished. Stevens harkens back to the ’80s with “Video Game” a song I could envision on a John Hughes movie soundtrack. The lyrics critique how we are being programmed to satisfy society’s expectations. Popular fads and preconceptions are keeping us from being authentic. We are being conditioned to care about all the wrong things as a society and even religion has too frequently sold out to the tawdry.

The stunning “Lamentations” combines an industrial rock sound with ethereal effects. Stevens in this counterintuitive glitchy track seems to warn that we must change our path or it will end in destruction. As the prophet, Jeremiah’s Lamentations of old, the constant chorus of “I Am the future” presents the doom looming over our society’s head. Stevens switches back to romantic topics with “Tell Me You Love Me” in his trademark yearning way. He questions whether there can ever be a love with total acceptance regardless of the disappointments, “can you carry this love across a desert?” It is a moving and gorgeous track that builds to a climax of emotion.

The gripping “Ativan”, named for the anti-anxiety drug, displays the feelings of an anxiety attack with a frenetic sonic collage. The narrator swings between wanting to be tranquillized and fearing the loss of feeling anything. Expressed are mankind’s fears of uncertainty, meaninglessness and pain. In the end, Stevens reveals that we all have to find our own way of coping with what the world hands us, “ …minding my business doing the best I can” and it is okay to use whatever tools are in the medicine cabinet.

Where Stevens looked for answers to his personal pain on Carrie and Lowell on The Ascension he looks to salve his crisis of faith. This quest is threaded throughout the release but nowhere more so than on “Ursa Major”. As always Stevens songs can be taken from a number of perspectives, but it is pretty apparent that this track is a pray for help and guidance. As he revels in the vastness of nature and the universe he comes back down to Earth asking God for mercy, “Lord I am praying for patience now call off your invasion.” What exactly is the invasion is up for question, and left to the listener’s imagination which is what makes the track so universal and inspired.

I expected something really special when I saw the song title “Gilgamesh” on the playlist and it does not disappoint. Stevens alludes to the ancient Sumerian tale of “Gilgamesh” submerging the listener in antiquity. We find ourselves in the Eden of The Hanging Gardens of Babylon pondering the archetypical ideas of bravery, noble behaviour and eternity. The choir-like vocals lull one into a blissful serenity and then the alarm sounds. The listener is brought back to reality as Stevens examines if any of those ideas still remain. It is a do not miss track.

“Death Star” and “Goodbye to All That” is a pairing of excellent industrial rock and serious dance beats. The tracks are akin to a marriage of Janet Jackson’s Control era with Trent Reznor’s The Downward Spiral all run through Sufjan’s musical mind. The title of “Death Star” harkens to vivid archetype imagery, popular culture and cosmos to once again offer up an engaging duo of tracks.

The lengthy track “Sugar” doesn’t seem over-indulgent once experienced. Instead, Sufjan uses each second of the track to weave a hypnotic sound that allows the listener to float along as he begs his lover for a kiss. The title track “Ascension” reverts back to Stevens using religious imagery and a loose version of the story of St. Paul’s conversion, which in Christian history occurred shortly after Christ’s ascension. After Paul’s persecuting Christians he is converted to Christianity and is exhorted to go convert the unfaithful and banish wrong. Stevens contrasts this to his desire to change the world around him and finding out he has to work on himself and find answers before taking on the world.

The final track “America” is Stevens’ response to our modern overheated and divisive political world. The track is a length 12 ½ minute, it is a protest song against the sickness that has flourished in American Culture. The majority of the track is instrumental with both beauty and cacophony that reflects the beauty and chaos of America. Stevens leaves this lasting question “What happens when the values you were raised with are proven to be opposite of what you were told they were?” This track is the culmination of everything Stevens has worked to discuss throughout the album and he leaves it to the listener to decide in this last haunting track that will resonate long after it is over.

The Ascension is a successful sonic marriage of the ethereal Coolwave, Funk beats and industrial glitchiness. It reveals an aesthetic panache that Stevens is so successful in continually offering. The Ascension is as deep as Carrie and Lowell but instead of exercising Steven’s personal demons it instead looks to identify and ward off the demons of human nature. It is as heartbreaking as Carrie and Lowell but on a universal scale. Where many artists can alienate the listener with what can come off as preachy tropes, Stevens is given allowance because his earnestness is unquestionable. The final verdict is that this album delivers another magnificent dose of Sufjan Stevens’ singular vision and musicality.

youtube

https://www.xsnoize.com/album-review-sufjan-stevens-the-ascension/

#sufjan stevens #the ascension

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thenewmandalordoc · 7 years

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Raphael Carion, Lord Commander of the Emperor's Children

“I have wept for my brothers. Now I’ll make the enemy weep for theirs.”

Lord Commander Raphael Carion was a Commander of the Emperor’s Children and one of Fulgrim’s ten ‘Prince of War.’ He and his Company were thought lost in the Warp after a horrific accident involving the ship’s navigator, and only recently reemerged still believing it is the Great Crusade and not knowing of his Legion demise.

He is now the Chapter Master of the Palatine Blades, with a strong motivation to regain the honor and dignity that his former legion had. This leads him to sometimes leaves him torn between what is morally right and what is tactically sound. He is skeptical of the motivations of the Inquisition, however, he is normally seen in the presence of Lord Inquisitor Godiva Iboni.

History

Pre-Crusade

The only son of master duelist Daniel Carrion - a former member of the Chemos’ Callax High Guard - Raphael grew up in training academies and target ranges. As a child, he read obsessively, to the point that jests were made about his habits since most children were focused on survival. However, apparently by something he had read, Raphael became motivated to become a warrior, although he did not initially seem inclined to martial habits. By the age of fifteen, he fought and defeated some of Chemos’ finest swordsmen, soon earning himself a place at the Royal Academe. He soon graduated at the top of his class and had soon gained the attention of Fulgrim.

Raphael found his early assignments, such as guarding the Chemos nobility or garrisoning over the Capitol, tedious but he would perform such acts to the best of his abilities. He would volunteer for the dangerous missions - such as scouting the mining wastes - and soon became a renowned duelist. Fulgrim soon took interest in the young duelist, and when offered a position in the Emperor’s Children Raphael quickly accepted. So began the military career of a young warrior who would come to represent everything that a legionary in the Emperor’s Children should strive to be.

Great Crusade

Enhanced beyond mortal bounds by the blessings of the Space Marine induction process, Raphael became ever more skilled in the arts of the blade. He never tired of challenging his peers in the exercises that their sergeants put them through every day.

Though his confidence and supreme skill might have earned the enmity of mortal men, his brothers in the Emperor’s Children sang his praises in all honesty. Their Legion admired perfection above all else. Before long, Raphael had come to the notice of Lord Commander Vespasian. As the Great Crusade unfolded, Raphael directed his puissant skill towards the goals of the Emperor’s Children on a dozen worlds brought to Imperial Compliance. He was rewarded with command of the 3rd Company. At first, Vespasian saw his faith in Lucius as well-placed. Though the young swordsman was self-serving and cocky, he was never found wanting in the arts of war. However, as he got old the Lord Commander began to worry about the young man’s soul - comparing him to Lucious at times - to the point where he had ordered the 3rd Company to learn from the Crimson Dragons on Meiji.

Time Amongst the Dragons

The Crimson Dragons and Emperor’s Children had always been at odds with each other based on their Primarch’s belief in beauty and perfection. The Emperor’s Children believed that beauty comes through perfection, while the Crimson Dragons believed that beauty came from imperfect, impermanent, and incomplete. Neither Legion could stand the other, but the friendship between Vespasian and Daimyo Satsuma Irou allowed Raphael to finish his training under the Captain’s tutelage - and learn some humility.

Raphael had opposed the perceived exile, viewing it more as a punishment than as a chance to learn. He even voiced his opinion to Fulgrim himself, but his Primarch agreed with Vespasian, who viewed it as a chance to civilize the imperfect dragons. During his studies, his duties included fetching water, cleaning the training floors, sweeping the temple-monastery steps, and meditation. All of which annoyed Raphael, who saw these actions as meaningless or meant for servitors. Irou offered that if Raphael defeated one-hundred Dragons, then he was free to go. With this new found determination, Raphael dispensed of opponents with machine-like motions, convinced with every victory was a step closer to going back to his Legion and the Crusade. Irou proved to be his last opponent, and though he fought like a man possessed, every iota of his being focused upon victory, Irou defeated him with a unarmored and with a bamboo training sword. Unsure how he was defeated, Raphael challenged Irou to a rematch and was defeated one-hundred times. Feeling depressed over his defeats, Irou reassured Raphael that he fought like a true son of Fulgrim and now he could start improving himself. From then on Raphael took his training more seriously.

After tutelage was with the Crimson Dragons was completed, Raphael came back a changed man. He portrayed a calmness and humility that was rarely seen in the Third Legion, gaining favor with Vespasian and shared his training regiment with the rest of his company.

Lost to the Warp

After aiding the Iron Hands with the destruction of the Diasporex, Raphael was awarded the rank of Lord Commander and given a place within Fulgrim’s personal retinue. Though he found the whole process ridiculous and divisive, Raphael continued to follow his Primarchs orders. He and his great company aboard the Strike Cruiser Divine Wind were sent aid Imperial Forces on Salusa Unus against the Dobhar Chu - or Water Dogs in low gothic - but never arrived. Once they entered the Warp, the Divine Wind and accompanying fleets were trapped. All hope was given up and Raphael’s name was entered on the roster of the Legion’s fallen and his statue placed in the Gallery of Heroes on Chemos.

Reemergence

Yet Raphael, his company, and fleet were not so dead as any supposed. Due to the fickle tides of the Warp, the Divine Wind and accompanying fleet returned to normal space nearly a ten thousand Terran years later, in 000 M42. However, the situation that the Emperor’s Children found themselves in had dramatically changed since they left. They located a Retribution-class battleship, the Litany of Hatred, with a contingency of Raven Guard on it, that was being attacked by unknown forces. These forces were the Angels of Ecstasy warband who thought that the emergence of an Emperor’s Children fleet would spell doom for the trapped Imperial forces. This all changed when the Divine Wind brought its entire firepower down on the Angels, exterminating every last one.

After every remaining chaos tainted ships had been decimated, Raphael ordered an open communication with the Imperial battleship. He was expecting to hear a friendly, though annoyed, voice of one of Raven Guard. What he did not expect was the voice of Inquisitor Godiva Iboni of the Ordo Hereticus, who ordered them to stand down and parley with her on the deck Litany of Hatred. Raphael agreed to these terms, still believing he was dealing with friendly forces and a simple human who believed that she had a self-inflated position.

Aboard the Litany of Hatred, however, Raphael and his closest legionaries found that this mere human held more power than they once thought. Her Raven Guard retinue listened to her as they would a captain, and it astounded Raphael that the proud and independent sons of Corax would allow a lowly human, regardless how lovely, to command them. Raphael tried to talk to the Raven Guard by asking them how their Primarch faired, and if Arkhas Fal was still their Shadow Lord or if Gherith Arendi had taken it. The Raven Guard were surprised that he knew venerated heroes of their chapter in a way as if he knew them, and if they were still alive. He even asked if the Inquisition was a fancy title given to Godiva by the Sigilite. Godiva simply asked him what year he thought it was, Raphael answered with 001.M31. Godiva corrected him with the correct date and telling him that he and his fellow Astartes had been stuck in the Warp for over ten thousand years. Raphael believes that to be a joke, Godiva decided to take him to Chemos.

Return to Chemos

Lord Inquisitor Iboni allowed Raphael the use of uncensored Imperial Records on their trip to Chemos. Raphael still found it hard to believe that his legion, a legion that swore constantly sought the Emperor’s approval with every endeavor, had turned away and joined Horus Lupercal in a civil war that resulted in the deaths of so many. He found it harder to believe that his own Primarch had given into vanity and hedonism which affected his entire legion.

Upon arriving back on Chemos, Raphael was shocked at the state of the planet. Orbital bombardments rendered the once beautiful and wealthy world lifeless, the cities and palaces that were once the envy of the Imperium had been reduced to nonexistence ruins in the attempt eradicate any trace of Chaos from the world.

The remains of Callax had been turned into a grand fortress that reminded Raphael of how the city once looked prior to the gold age under Fulgrim. The green forests had been reduced to black and grey wastelands, dark clouds exploded the world and the shining city of art, pleasure, and commerce where he grew up was a headquarters for the Inquisition. The only recent of Chemos’ artistic culture were statues of heroes that lined the Fortress’s promenade; one of which was his.

Sorrow and anguish began to build inside of Raphael and his Company, leading Inquisitor Iboni to start believing who he was. However, a harsh cackle came from the ashen deserts; Lucius the Eternal had come to challenge the last Prince of War. Lucious and Raphael had been rivals in the Third Legion, each one trying to best the other to gain Fulgrim’s favor. Now Lucius had found favor with his new God, Slaneesh, and offered the Third Company similar favor if they merely submitted to the Will of the Dark Prince. All they had to do was kill their Lord Commander as well as every other soul on Chemos. Without hesitation, the Third Company refused, which sent Lucius into a crazed slaughter.

The Raven Guard retinue and the Inquisitional Stormtroopers were the first to die, while the loyal Emperor’s Children fought their disgraced brethren. Inquisitor Iboni led her forces admirably, but even her psykic powers proved no match for the mad swordsman. Raphael managed to stop Lucius from killing the Inquisitor, leading to the fight the Traitor wanted. Each fresh wound had sent Lucius giggling with glee. Raphael bared his teeth, slashing and jabbing as his opponent laughed, staggered and whirled across the decease world like a demented marionette.

Raphael was every bit as fast as his tainted foe. Lucius fought hard to get within the reach of the saber, ducking and rolling with fluid grace. Weapons clashed and clanged in a staccato blur. Though Lucius’ blade was sharp as a razor and blessed by She-who-Thirsts, it could not penetrate the conversion field that Raphael’s Iron Halo offered, and Raphael could not scratch the demonic armor that protected Lucius. When their blades locked, Lucius tried to goat Raphael into making a fatal error. Raphael merely smiled and took out his bolt pistol, blasting Lucius’ sword arm off at the elbow. Time seemed to freeze as Raphael cut away Lucius’ lash, while also grabbing hold of the Blade of Laer - using the ruined remain of Lucius’ arm as a shield against its corruptive power, and plunged it through the once Lord Commander to it reached the hilt.

As Lucius lay on the ashen fields that had been his home, he questioned if Raphael took any pleasure or satisfaction in besting him; knowing of the curse. Raphael sighed as said that under any other pretenses he would be, but now he merely pitied the sorry state that his Legion had become. He turned away from Lucius as his remains were reclaimed by the Dark Prince. Lucius’ master was not pleased.

Raphael ordered the Company’s apothecaries to treat the wounded, starting with Lord Inquisitor Iboni. The dedication and strive that Raphael and his Company demonstrated in fending off their once brother Astartes proved to the Lord Inquisitor that the Third Company was true to their loyalty to the Emperor. In return for saving her life, she would help Raphael rebuild his Company into a full loyalist Chapter.

Palatine Blades

With the blessing of the Inquisition, Raphael has now received fresh gene stock, weapons, armor and new Planetary system to draw recruits from. However, he now has the new responsibilities of serving as a Chapter Master for a newly found Chapter. Raphael had to reorganize his company to fit the design of a Chapter, by making the veterans of the Company into the Captains and specialty contingents. Inquisitor Iboni has been helping with the transition, but there had been challenges which had lead to conflicts in the Chapter.

One comes from the mandatory Chaplains within the Chapter. These unique units were made after his Company became trapped in the warp, and were meant to serve as spiritual leaders while also preaching the Emperor’s laws as if they were religious decrees. Since Raphael and his men came from a time when the worship of any religion was outlawed, and that Emperor of Mankind had rejected all forms of divinity, he had a hard to adjusting to Inquisition placed Astartes.

Another conflict comes from the existence of the Codex Astartes. Though many in the Chapter will admit that the Codex Astartes is a well written and though tome for military organization, those same supporters find it ridiculous that other Chapters would read it as a holy text.

The final grievance, and most divisive amongst the Blades, are the inclusion of the new Primaris Space Marines. Furthering an already tenuous relationship with the Sons of Guiliman, many Palatine Blades find the Primaris Astartes to be an insult to them and to the Emperor’s design. Some have openly lashed out, stating there it is impossible that an ambitious Techpriest could out perform the Greatest Human who had ever lived. Though Raphael shares these same views, he has proceeded with the Primaris operations and started to welcome more Primaris Marines into his Chapter. His example had inspired more to receive the surgery, leading to ninety-nine percent of his Chapter becoming augmented. While seeming complacent, his apothecaries have warned him about the rusting nature of the sinew coils, and all Primaris Marines are stripped of a previously held rank or title and given the rank of an initiate. From there they will be under the watchful gaze Scout-Captain Greco Colt and Company Champion Jidaar Ecaz.

The Chapter’s regalia has been changed to pay homage to Third Legion origins. Two platinum sabers crosses on a dark purple field, which matches their armor now. Though an importance is still placed on perfection, Raphael always makes a point that the pursuit of perfection should not cold one’s judgment. The Chapter is routinely scanned for any trace of Chaos by the Inquisition, and Raphael allows it if it means seeing Lord Inquisitor Iboni again.

Appearance

Raphael is seen as very impressive, even for an Astartes. He is tall and handsome, with striking green eyes and brown hair that he wears long. He wears Artificer Power Armor that demonstrates his rank as a Lord Commander, and his own artistic abilities. He wears a long purple and gold cape that would seem to deter Raphael during a fight, but those who have seen him in action say that the cape becomes another extension.

Personality

Like all Emperor’s Children, Raphael was once driven by the impossible desire to attain perfection in all that he did. Raphael accepted nothing less than perfection in all of his endeavors and worked ceaselessly to perfect his and his company’s military endeavors. However, with his time amongst the Crimson Dragons, Raphael’s perception of perfection had changed, leading to a freedom that few in his legion could claim to have. This freedom allowed Raphael to study his legion’s habits more closely, and he became worried with their obsession for perfection. He began to teach the Third Company his knowledge that he acquired. This began to alienate Raphael from the other Companies, but it allowed him to create a stronger bond with his legionaries.

Raphael could still be cocky, arrogant, and snarky, even after his time with the Crimson Dragons. Part of this comes from his own martial abilities, while also being from another time. He has little interest in factions outside the Adeptus Astartes, and would rather do business with factions he knows. During the parley that followed the battle against the Traitorous Space Marines, Raphael walked past Inquisitor Iboni and engaged the Raven Guard who were escorting her.

Though his legion had turned to Chaos, Raphael and his Company remain loyal to the Emperor and the Imperium of Man.

Wargear

• Artificer Power Armor

• Charnabal Sabre - an elegant and deadly melee weapon that relies on speed and dexterity rather than brute force for its lethality. Though Raphael is astute in all manners of blades, he preferred the dexterity of the sabers over the clumsier power weapons.

• Master Crafted Bolt Pistol

• Iron Halo of Invulnerability - A gift bestowed to him upon becoming a Lord Commander and one of Fulgrim’s Prince of War. The Halo is said to offer “perfect protection from any harm.” Whether this is true or not, Raphael has shrugged off blows that would have felled other opponents.

So another OC for the blog, yay.

The reason I created Raphael was because I drew inspiration (inspiration = copied) from @fuukonomiko with Karimah and Magnus from her story “Tainted”, and @sisterofsilence for Vallerie, Sobek and Thrax. The idea of a member of a renegade legion has always intrigued me ever since the Garro novels, and I thought of taking it to an extreme a bit. @mrsdorn Can tell you how a certain Imperial Fist was stuck in the Warp for over a thousand years, I just had Raphael be trapped inside for longer.

As for inspiration (more like appropriation), Raphael is based on Duncan Idaho from the Dune franchise. Master swordsman who died killing twenty Sardaukar and then kept coming back thanks to those disgusting, little zealot bene tleilax. Inquisitor Godiva Iboni is based on Ikora Reyes from Destiny. A) because she is cool (and that is now-way catering to my Warlock playstyle), and B) she is voiced by Gina Torres who was Zoe on Firefly.

And for Lucius the Eternal fans out there - why do you exist?! - don’t worry he’s not dead. Lucious Lucius is fine… in general terms. He just happened to lose a good amount of favor with Slaanesh and Fulgrim for being killed by his own blade. By a mortal. Who came from the same Legion as he. And stayed uncorrupted…. Yeah, he’s getting a good, hard spanking from the God/Goddess of Suprise Butt-Sex.

Also a shout out to @crysdrawsthings , I think you would have fun with Raphael and his pretty hair.

#Raphael Carion #Godiva Iboni #Emperor's Children #Emperor's Talon #Lucius the Eternal

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curriebelle · 8 years

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I’m sure you all guessed this but if you’re lookin for something to do between Thursdays I’m gonna recommend Baldur’s Gate II to e v e r y o n e. Especially if you don’t have a D&D group at home, because it’s the closest you’ll get to D&D without one, and ESPECIALLY if you’re also a Bioware fan. I have some thinky thoughts about it & Dragon Age II here. Not so much the usual #currie academia, but along those lines nonetheless.

So I said in a post before that Baldur’s Gate II is very much like what Dragon Age 2 should have been, and I want to pull that apart for you somewhat. Disclaimer here that while I’ve played DA2 a disgusting number of times, I’m only 20 or so days into BG2 (Chapter 3, I think)

I acknowledge that technically speaking, DA2 is rightfully the lowest-rated game of the Dragon Age franchise, but it’s also my favourite by far. This is largely because I admired what it aspired to be. It wanted to be an in-depth exploration of a single, fascinating locale, and all the conflicts that could arise from it across time. Some of the things people complained about - such as Hawke having such a limited background, the divisiveness of the companions and their behaviour, and the lack of a single overarching villain - were the result of reaching for this goal and failing. Bioware either lost their direction or lacked the time to pull it off . A lot of the other problems with the game, particularly the repeated dungeon maps, but also the useless junk-gathering and slimmed-down combat (which I actually liked, but I get that it’s controversial) managed to cripple this particular aspiration even further. Kirkwall lost parts of its complexity and bigness, but clues of it remained behind - particularly in the morally complex sidequests, which often hold a mirror up to the larger conflicts. My favourite one is when you head out to find the son of some noble or count and it turns out that he’s just a regular old straight-up murderer. No demons in his head, but suffering a mental illness - not one I’m qualified to diagnose, but one that each of the party members misinterprets as a pathetic excuse for his violence. Their preferred solution is to kill the bastard, but a player - if they actually know what mental illness is, and how it can be mismanaged - is left with much more to think about.

The resemblance between Dragon Age II and Baldur’s Gate 2 started out as simple allusions and parallels, which I thought were amusing. Now I know who Edwina the barmaid is, and now I know why the loading screens say “gather your party before venturing forth”, and now I know why they make you collect pantaloons. I’ve also met some of the predecessors of the Dragon Age party members. Imoen looks a heckofa lot like an early-2000s Leliana and gets the same broken-bird treatment. Jan Jansen is Varric after several heavy doses of hallucinatory drugs, from the family merchant business to the hand-made crossbow to the penchant for tall tales. I’m pretty sure Velanna from Awakening is a re-skinned Viconia (and I think they share a VA, to boot). Also, I feel like some of the flatter BG2 characters were revamped, re-examined, or re-incarnated. Anomen is pretty much a sexist prick so far, but he’s had some interesting chats with me about his lawful-neutralness. I wonder if their answer to him was to take the same ethics but fix the sexism problem with a genderflip, because in a lot of ways he reminds me of Aveline. (Disclaimer: this in no way takes away from the fact that Aveline is the greatest thing ever and Anomen is a lil shit). Moreover, Morrigan’s eternally grumpy power-hungry practicality, as well her potential prideful fall, and her return, in a sequel, as a semi-friendly spy embedded in a political clusterfuck (Orlesian court vs. Shadow Thieves) makes her quite reminiscent of Edwin. There are others, too, as there are exceptions. I don’t see a clear Fenris analogue in BG2 yet, nor has Minsc ever been properly revived (though Iron Bull maybe comes close). I think that’s smart, though. Imoen/Leliana is a good template to reuse but Minsc shall never be equaled.

Beyond the people in my party, I started to see traces of Kirkwall in Athkatla. Some of the districts have obvious analogues (Keep = Government, Hightown = Waukeen’s Promenade (same aesthetic, even, with all the white stone), Darktown/Lowtown = Slums/Graveyard, Docks = ....well, Docks). There’s also the sense that there are some really hecked-up things going on in the underbelly of the Athkatla, what with the random lich I found in the Egyptian-style tomb under the graveyard (?), the beholders in the sewers (FUCK) and the strange women Naruto-running around at night and casting dominate on random thugs (???). Plus they have a strangely perpendicular policy on magic. Mages in Athkatla are both the Circle and the Templars - that is, the practice of magic is heavily restricted, but it’s restricted by the Cowled Wizards (who have conveniently cast Immunity to Government on themselves). Or perhaps Athkatla is what the Tevinter Imperium looks like from the inside?

Quest structures are also re-used between the games. The overarching quest of the first part of BG2 is identical to Dragon Age II′s - I have to raise enough money to Save my Sister, either to protect her from the Circle or steal her back from Irenicus. The anti-qunari cult and the weirdness of the Primeval Thaig are not dissimilar to the Cult of the Unseeing Eye quest (except for the FUCKING BEHOLDERS aaah). There’s somebody skinning people in the Bridge District at the moment, and though I haven’t advanced very far in that quest I’m catching the horrible, creeping scent of All That Remains about it. One of the very first quests was to return a handful of acorns to a faerie queen, which requires that you leave Athkatla - and it felt almost exactly like turning over Flemeth’s amulet, even before I found the red dragon hanging out in the same area. I’m even getting companion loyalty quests now (hence, Edwina) and while reuniting Keldorn with his wife was considerably less funny (though just as heartwarming) as convincing Aveline and Donnic to Cup each others’ Joinings, I’m not surprised I’ll be helping people with everything from marriages to magic mishaps. Let’s just hope Jan Jansen doesn’t make me gather poo for his turnip-based explosives so he can bomb the Cowled Wizards or something (Cheers, Justice, I’ll always love you).

But these similarities aren’t really a bad thing at all. I’m certainly not accusing Bioware of copying their own homework - I’m actually accusing them of failing to copy their own homework. Or, to stretch the metaphor, for their horrible teacher Mr. EA to change the deadlines to their homework without telling them so they had to rush it and get a C+ from all the game critics. Poor muffins.

Here’s the thing. The inklings I had about The Point of setting things exclusively in Kirkwall are full-on confirmed by the existence of Baldur’s Gate II and Athkatla. Games like DA:O and DA:I are explorations of breadth, spanning countries; games like DA2 and BG2 are explorations in depth, spanning time, and digging deep into a particular city. Athkatla feels amazingly alive to me, and endlessly fascinating and complex. There are multiple underground ruins alluding to ancient magic and long-forgotten deaths. There are hints in the government district that everyone from nobility to turnip farmers regularly drown in ineffective bureaucracy. The Shadow Thieves, the Cowled Wizards, the noble families, and the Radiant Heart, and the Circus, all of them fill out the middle ranks of a squabbling, rule-breaking, living populace. Party members have ties to everyone from peasants, to nobility, to Cambions from Sigil. And there are strange individuals everywhere, spies and liars and con artists and performers and collectors and people who will only sell me turnips. I just finished a quest where three young boys asked me to buy them swords and I bought them a keg of ale instead. It was awesome.

Anyway, this actually segues into something else that’s interesting for me - Dragon Age 2 was all set to tackle the coolest thing that emerged, quite organically, in BG2 - the fact that of all the characters in the game, Athkatla is the most interesting. Playing it, you begin to understand why the quests are so similar between it and DA2. Exploring things like lost ruins, or the different rewards, invitations and behaviours of different organizations, or serial killers and justice systems, or problems with merchants, or entertainment venues like theatres and circuses, or religious conflicts - those are all quests that deeply engage one in the character of a place. Quite frankly, I like that better than hopping town-to-town and solving problems as you pass, which is the DA:O/DA:I model. It’s far too easy to seem random that way (what did those werewolves in DA:O ever amount to?). And conversely, it’s also why things like the party in Orlais are the most exciting things in those games: they offer you glimpses into the operation of society, into how the fantasy world truly works from the crowns to the cobblestones. BG2 is made of that experience of depth, and DA2 was prepared to be that but more.

In certain places, you can see how DA2 fixed the very, very few problems BG2 actually had (alongside a decade of technological development, of course.) The rivalry/friendship system in DA2 is a huge improvement on the reputation/alignment system of BG2. I am effective as shit at solving problems so why does Edwin grouse at me just because I’m nice? Moreover, why do I have to choose between mega-discounts and the game’s best wizard? I much prefer the idea of friendship/rivalry, because real people can respect and disagree with you, and (although this might just be because I have his romance mod installed *ahem*) the DA2-esque Rivalry relationship seems to better characterize how Edwin thinks of me anyway. And while I’m on my soapbox, why’d they take that system away from Inquisition? Rivalry was certainly would have given me a better time with Vivienne, whom I desperately wanted to love but couldn’t because I could never get her approval high enough to offer me any quests. Heck, at least Edwin will still get Nether Scroll’d even if he constantly complains about me rescuing kittens.

Moreover, before its flawed execution, the skeleton of DA2 is far more ambitious and intriguing than BG2′s. BG2 is still a defeat-the-evil wizard game, and it stumbled across the story-of-a-city model largely by accident (one of the most graceful stumbles I’ve ever seen, that’s for sure). I assume (though correct me if I’m wrong) that I’ll still be kickin’ Irenicus’s unsympathetic ass as an endgame (unless he goes Sephiroth Supernova or has an evil boss or something). DA2’s conflicts with the qunari, and especially the conflict between the mages and the templars, turned the city into DA2′s most interesting character and its primary villain, which is the logical, brilliant extenstion of what BG2 accomplished. Meredith, Anders and Orsino - the trifecta of DA2’s endgame catalysts - were all emblematic of an impossible social and political conflict, born out of everything Kirkwall was over the span of a decade. Almost every little plotline in DA2 gives you something new to think about in terms of law, order, magic and rule in Kirkwall, and the finale was a culmination of that. It was a narrative waterfall into which the stream of every sidequest fed. It’s a brilliant structure - but it failed to spark the love its narratively inferior predecessor did, and certainly failed to achieve the quality of BG2.

And it’s only because Kirkwall is no Athkatla. It could have been, but it wasn’t. It felt emptier, and thinner, less populated and less complex, even though all the bones were there. This was largely because of those repeated dungeons - there’s something new in every corner in BG2, and the exploration of the wilderness outside the city is more extended, and every room is different, whereas the dungeons in DA2 wear out their welcome before the first act is over. It’s immensely frustrating, because Dragon Age 2 was so close to being BG2 but better. And there are things (particularly that friendship/rivalry thing) that are marks of improvement and reflection borne of lessons learned from BG2 and DA:O. It makes DA2 even more of a tragedy than it already was. Suffice to say I love both these games a lot, and I am indeed recommending that anybody whose curiosity has been piqued immediately download BG2 from gog.com (I hear there’s a bear companion in the Enhanced Edition. His name is Wilson).

But if I might replace the soapbox a second, I think the biggest tragedy of all of this was that Bioware didn’t try again. For all that Dragon Age 2 felt unfinished and unfocused, it was nowhere near as soulless and directionless as Dragon Age Inquisition, at least for me. Inquisition functioned fine, and it’s not a “bad” game by any quantifiable metric, but I could not be asked to play it more than once. I know people like it, and there are things about it to like - from my own perspective, I loved the fancy-party sequence, and there have been few companions in any game as interesting to me as Blackwall (is that a weird choice? I don’t know, I’m not really In This Fandom). But I did not care about my Inquisitor the way I cared about Hawke. I didn’t care about something as indistinct as The Inquisition the way I cared about Kirkwall, as underdeveloped as it was. I admired DA:II’s aspirations; I do not admire Inquisition’s attempt to be Skyrim when that’s not what we come to Bioware for. I don’t want Bioware to make Skyrim, I want Bioware to try BG2/DA2 again. It could be so phenomenal if they pulled it off.

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angrycollectordaze-me-blog · 6 years

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Essay代写：American Independent movie

下面为大家整理一篇优秀的essay代写范文- American Independent movie，供大家参考学习，这篇论文讨论了美国独立电影。哈莫尼・科林是美国独立电影界的一位怪才导演，他的作品始终坚持着自己独特的影像风格和电影制作上的独立性。他的电影作品开辟了一条十分复杂并否定轻易评论的途径，颠覆了传统上逻辑直白草率的思路，模糊了普通的非黑即白的对立思想，同时也为美国核心文化与理想付诸了十分有趣的摸索。

Harmony Colin is a maverick character of American independent film, from the beginning of the medium teenager, to the later, the "spring break" over the years, he always adhere to their own unique style of video and film production on independence. His works have opened up a very complicated and negative way of easy comment, subverted the traditional straightforward and careless logic, blurred the common opposition of black and white, and put into practice a very interesting exploration of the core American culture and ideals. This article will try to interpret the theme presentation, narrative technique, audio-visual style, characters and other aspects of his work.

For Harmony Colin and his film and television works, people often use "provocative" and "exploitation" to describe. In 1981, the 18-year-old filmmaker wrote the script for "the half-grown boy," which described a group of Manhattan teenagers who grew up in an environment rife with social dark elements. Famous director in the future will work to make into a movie, the film in 48th annual cannes film festival has attracted intense review divisions, with critics view on the film should be understood as the documentary shows the life style of contemporary youth and a wake-up call for people, or to understand for teenagers about sex and makes people uncomfortable, exploitation films. Harmony will be colin works, explore the characteristics of his work.

Adapted to movie director in memories of the beginning work of reason, the thought of another film and television work, the work directed by the director's guide, the film describes a gnome workhouse for a penalty event trigger public brawl, continues the style of the talented director, preferences: prefer obsession and madness beyond ordinary film system of the role of. Its highly personal characteristics vividly reveal the thick barriers between special groups and normal society and their inevitable loneliness. Everywhere in the film, the eerie and weird atmosphere, let colin have a good feeling, hear, see image at the cinema, let him know in an instant by oneself want to what kind of movie, so his order of those outside the characters in the film could explain now, colin is not balance the public's curiosity, but in a narrative and the past the opposite.

In the original work, the director created a group of characters immersed in the complex and changeable cultural environment, who wandered away from the system, and the director used his imaginative and creative heart to make their emptiness and loneliness poetic. The director then developed a similar personal style. Therefore, we see the intoxication of crime and sexual disorder, development to cannot extricate themselves from the youth; The dumb bunny, the retarded whore, the black dwarf, the transvestite, and the cat abused teen in "kiwi"; The broken arm in "Julian the donkey", the black man with albinism, and the hero with neurological disease. The cranky impersonators of celebrities in Mr. Lonely, the slow twisters in nursing homes: the rebellious, defiant teenagers and tattooed mobsters in "holiday"; There are also some very destructive old people who are completely out of touch with normal values, hiding in dark corners of the city. The above characters, who straddle the system, stubbornly attempt to give private opinions and establish their own way of thinking, which naturally leads to a unique theatrical expressiveness. This particular dramatic expression falls in the eyes of the director, constituting a unique world of physically handicapped special people, and the more ordinary role of pure kindness makes people feel more sincere and brave.

Mr Lonely, there is a group of isolated utopia life imitators, Marilyn Monroe, Charlie Chaplin, Michael Jackson... They lived together and presented a stage show of song and dance, acrobatics and skits, but the audience was pitifully small. This section in addition to using a similar light colors and lines arrangement to John card savi, the murder of underground boss said the respect, but also embodies the colin to similar to a variety show, stage artistes and touring troupe has a special liking type things.

One of the director's works has been attacked fiercely and also because of the director's drama complex. The director is obsessed with the ancient skills and firmly supports the ancient traditional performance forms. The acrobat stood bravely on the lonely stage, and tried to show all his skills to the few audiences, so as to get a small payment. Such a form of performance was very impressive. Director was very yearning to become a tap dancer, his each work is not hard to see his love of tap: in days of paradise actress Linda menzies had skipped a few minutes in the strange boy, tap dance, the lonely Mr An impersonation of lovers to imitate the famous classic performances of tap dancer, high respect and miss to the artist. A similar carnival atmosphere can be found in "junk insurance poles" and "spring break". These two films show the metaphor generated by the contrast between blurry picture and high-definition picture. The first is an eerie, pale face filled with the hormones of youth. But actually the two films are like an indivisible whole, with some similarities. In the film's larger plot lines, unbridled debauchery and appalling terror are turned into a seemingly endless feast. The characters celebrate in various ways at this feast that they have worked hard to fulfill their long-cherished wishes, freed themselves from bondage and gained a certain social status and rich material wealth, and become more free in spirit. This is exactly the carnival feature of these two films which are rendered with masks, makeup and other rituals. The characters in the film are deeply immersed in the Bohemian environment, free from the traditional repression, breaking the constraints of order and discourse, destroying the inherent separation of classes, and finding the way to express the emotions gathered for a long time.

There is no conventional narrative structure of the causes, processes, and outcomes of ordinary stories in this director's work. "Kiwi boy", for example, has two main lines: one is a young boy who spends his days in the city streets killing stray cats for pleasure, indulging in drugs, loafing, having sex with insane sex workers, and killing an unconscious old man out of good intentions. The other is the girls, led by dott, who care only about grooming, playing, discussing boys, and caring for and looking after lost domestic cats. The two main lines combine special elements similar to documentaries, including the questioning of real characters and the plots derived from real life. There is also a special character, who is born disabled and unable to speak and wears extravagant and eccentric decorations, who separates boys from girls. The author's other two works still use this way of narration. Their seemingly scattered and unrelated plots also have certain rules and die out at a random time.

The collage of fragments also has a completely random, disintegrating order, and disappears at a natural moment of disillusionment. Thematically, they address a problem: the nomads and dreamers who create their own reality and live within it, pure souls and persistence are not stable. The director makes these two completely separate, keeping them unattached to other things. Another "holiday" has several different works, works seem only contains one day story lines, the protagonists on his journey, with the continuous development of the plot, the same dialogue be repeatedly mentioned, with a background music is played repeatedly, images of playback with special skills also repeated shots a little slower, these all make the story becomes complicated. The opening and closing styles of the film are similar, and all have the sound of shooting. This environment is full of fantastic fantasy and misty fog, and the movie's eternal vacation is sealed into a flowing endless story, like an endless dream. The director tries his best to depict a special system, that the stories are random and do not affect each other. "I think of it as an old family photo album," he once said of his work. "there are strawberries planted by the mother next to the child's pet, next to you, staggering as you walk for the first time, and next to you, when you travel in Africa." Each photo tells its own story and is unconnected, and when viewed as a whole, they are the best vehicle for the family story. He doesn't think that people's real life will be the same as in the movies. Deep in his heart, he thinks that the things happening around people are independent, hard to connect them with straightforward logic, and his works have inherited this idea.

During his days in northern Europe, the director met the Muse who wrote Mr. Lonely. While he was wandering aimlessly through the local village, he came across a very sad lady who led him to their stables, where the bodies of many horses had been piling up and had been dead for a long time, their stiff legs pointing with despair and anger at the still blue skies of northern Europe. On the way home, he conceived of Mr. Lonely. The long-dead body of evidence of life has long since disappeared, desperately pointing towards the firmament on which this classic work has taken root. The director took visual effects very seriously and practiced a lot, trying to create an unprecedented visual experience.

As a radical attempt "amazing kid", the photographer makes yves apotheker fe brought film is deeply rooted in the hearts of the people's main body color. "Donkey boy Julian" also tries out the feasibility of DV filming, with colin loving DV intimacy and immediacy, maximising the cast's framing sense and facilitating improvisation. The film expresses this special journey with unrelated stories, unconventional editing and dim and out-of-focus colors, making the film infinitely close to the mental state of its hero Julian. A similar out-of-focus, sordid visual effect was created with the garbage bumper, also tried out on a home video camera. With special shooting equipment, "holiday" builds up the mysterious film picture. Repeatedly slowing down the lens speed and detailed expression brings the audience into it, making the audience immersive. Most importantly, it is a metaphor for the American dream that is no longer prosperous and empty.

Colin expressed in most of the film in Europe director Alan clark's salute, especially in such aspects as shots and lens model, they weaken the boundary between the existence and unreal. The film makes the audience feel as if they are in outer space. The exotic beauty, weightlessness and lost charm are integrated into the film. For colin, "the truth that a film is 24 squares per second" is a lie that cannot be believed. He believes that everything in the work must conform to the reality, even if there is no complete sense of reality, even the documentary film will have some artificial or even fabricated plot. What the director can do is a trade-off between external reality and internal nothingness. But the director also feel that kind of artistic conception from the sky, can't find any artificial manipulation or idea, the best example of this is Charles fatigue "night of the hunter. Fuzzy truth and non-truth are not only a design out of style, but also an aesthetic strategy that cannot be interpreted.

Colin does not agree that the world tries to analyze his work with the subtleties or connotations of the written word. There is no doubt that his work opens up a very complicated way of denying easy criticism. When "strange boy" was first screened at the festival, a large number of film and television fans left because they could not tolerate animal cruelty. "Even if the content of the film is entirely divorced from reality, the aspects of moral issues, poverty and sexual norms are very prominent and unquestionably relentless." There may be doubt about whether the director still has the goodness of "the beginning of man", but it is undeniable that some of the plots in the work still touch and even hurt the audience. The more fussy "junk safety" is perhaps the director's most mortifying film, in which the insane and elderly show all the ugliness, while the film occasionally showcases waltzing, piano, temporary pain and creative beauty. Many times in his works are descriptions of the "American landscape" and contemporary representation of the American dream.

This landscape is present in the garbage in the bumper, silent no one night and traditional community architecture, hiding in the shadows of the rows of trash can been lit by the dim lights, wearing strange masks "destroyer" vent to their dissatisfaction with impulse and relentlessly, celebrating in this planet is forgotten; The little village of kiwi, where the citizens of numbness and poverty have nothing to do because of a devastating tornado, is a canceled American dream. Spring break, on the other hand, is more like a dream that is about to be shattered. It shows people immersed in violence, pleasure and decadence in the camera, and they tend to go to the edge of chaos and dangerous fanaticism before they can wake up.

Haney Colin opened a very complex and the negative comments, easily destroyed by rough distinguish between culture and useless thoughts, forgotten about the existence or nothing, ethics, and the darkness of the dualist position, as well as into the American core culture and ideal felt very interesting. The violence in colin's works is often accompanied by the existence of humor, and the blurring of truth and non-truth is not only a design out of style, but also an aesthetic strategy that cannot be interpreted. He made an extraordinary exploration of the theme of American core culture and dream, presenting the American dream in an anatomical way.

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