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grailfinders · 4 years ago

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Fate and Phantasms #146: Medusa (Lancer)

Today on Fate and Phantasms, we’re making the mini-dusa, Medusa Lancer. In this build, Medusa is an Eldritch Knight Fighter, and only that. Sadly Flesh to Stone is a little to high-level to get, but we’ll make it work.

Check out her build breakdown below the cut, or her character sheet over here!

Next up: The closest thing we’re getting to a Tiamat build.

Race and Background

Having been kicked out of godhood by Athena, Medusa is the ultimate Hermit, giving her Religion proficiency. We’ll also switch things up and give her Acrobatics proficiency for sick anime flips while fighting.

Like her sisters, she’s also a Yuan-Ti, giving her +1 Intelligence and +2 Strength, thanks to Tasha’s. She also gets Darkvision, Innate Spellcasting for the Poison Spray cantrip and unlimited uses of Animal Friendship on snakes. At third level you can also cast Suggestion once per long rest. All these spells use charisma to cast. You have Magic Resistance and Poison Immunity as well, the former giving you advantage on saves against magic, and the latter making you completely immune to poison damage and the poisoned condition.

It’s a shame you aren’t Small, but no race is perfect.

Ability Scores

Even if you’re wearing armor it doesn’t cover much, so make sure your Dexterity is pretty high. After that is Strength, which actually becomes your highest stat after racial bonuses if you’re using the standard array, because you’re swinging around a giant scythe and you aren’t a monk. Third is Intelligence, you know more than you let on and that’s the stat your eyes are attached to. Your Constitution isn’t amazing, but it’ll be plenty. Your Wisdom is kind of low, but we’re dumping Charisma. You just are not a people person, and you’re easily bribed with sweets.

Levels

1. First level fighters get a Fighting Style, and Thrown Weapon Fighting makes your scythe and chains a little more deadly, adding 2 to its damage rolls. Drawing the weapon can also be done in the same action you attack with it. You also get a Second Wind, letting you heal yourself as a bonus action. Your goddess core might protect you, but it’s important to pace yourself too.

You also get proficiency in Strength and Constitution saves, as well as two fighter skills. You’ve been on your own for a bit, so Survival is a good pick, and your character arc starts with you not being a fan of humanity, so I bet your Intimidation rolls will get a workout.

2. Second level fighters get an Action Surge, letting you slap an extra action onto your turn once per short rest. Copying an anime is always hard to do in D&D, but this’ll make it a bit easier at least.

3. As an Eldritch Knight, you get a Weapon Bond, letting you summon a weapon to your hand as a bonus action. You also can’t be disarmed while you’re conscious, but you’ll be throwing that thing around so much it probably won’t do much.

The big draw of the E. Knight, however, is the Spells you can cast with your Intelligence. Most of the spells you get will be abjuration or evocation, but that doesn’t stop you from getting Booming Blade and Mold Earth as cantrips. The former makes your scythe a bit scarier, and the latter is one of the few things proving your legitimacy as an earth goddess. You also get Mage Armor, because let’s be honest that outfit doesn’t count, Snare for some quick and dirty immobilization, and Longstrider to make yourself a little more mobile.

4. Speaking of mobility, use your first Ability Score Improvement to grab the Mobile feat, making you 10′ faster per round and making it so you can ignore attacks of opportunity from creatures you’ve tried to hit this turn.

You also learn the spell Protection from Evil and Good, making it harder for the gods to continue to ruin your life. Gods: not even once.

5. Your Extra Attack lets you attack twice per action, or four times with your action surge. Chains aren’t that deadly a weapon, it’s more about the quantity over quality.

6. Use this ASI to bump up your Intelligence for stronger spells. Trust me, you’ll want them.

7. Seventh level eldritch knights learn War Magic. If you use your action to cast a cantrip, you can then use your bonus action to hit somebody. How nice of them. You also learn the first of the two “none of the spells from 2nd level really work for you so we’re taking things that could reasonably be construed as Not Magic” spells, Enhance Ability, which lets you try a bit harder to gain advantage on one kind of ability score check. If you pick one of the physical scores, you also get a little bonus for your troubles.

8. Use this ASI to bump up your Strength for stronger scything. You also learn the one good 2nd level spell, Hold Person, forcing a wisdom saving throw (DC 8+proficiency + int modifier) on a humanoid, or they become paralyzed for the duration of the spell, up to a minute. They get to remake the save each round, but we’ll get a way to deal with that in a bit.

9. Before that though, you’re going to be Indomitable, letting you re-roll a failed save once per long rest! Your wisdom save’s looking a little weak, but we’ll patch it up in a bit.

10. Tenth level eldritch knights get an Eldritch Strike, giving creatures you hit disadvantage on saves against your spells for the next round. That means hitting people makes your hold person work better, and hold person makes your hitting people work better. It’s symbiosis.

Your war magic is so powerful it almost makes True Strike not useless, and you also get the second NOTSF2LRWFYSWTTTCRBCANM spell, Arcane Lock. It’s a lock, just pretend you’re carrying a lock around for some reason.

11. I hope the Extra Attacks aren’t getting too repetitive yet, because you’re getting another one this level! Now you can attack three times an action, or six times a turn with action surge.

You also learn the spell Thought Shield, because I was so tired of second level’s nonsense I turned to the UA to pad this out. For eight hours, one creature you touch can’t have their mind read, and it has advantage on saves that would determine if it’s lying. If people could figure you out, you wouldn’t be a god.

12. Twelfth level fighters get another ASI, and this one is making us Resilient, giving you +1 Wisdom and proficiency with wisdom saves. Actually getting magic cast on you is for plebians.

13. Your second use of Indomitable per long rest isn’t that flashy, but what is flashy is getting to use third level spells, like Intellect Fortress! For up to an hour, the creature you target has resistance to psychic damage, and gets advantage on Intelligence, Wisdom, and Charisma saves. You already have advantage on most of those saves thanks to magic resistance, but now you can pass that onto a chosen champion as well. You could also use that third level slot for hold person, to hold two people at once.

14. Let’s make your magic even stronger with another ASI going right into Intelligence. That should make your eyes almost inescapable! You also learn the spell Haste, doubling your movement speed, adding 2 to your AC, and giving you most of an extra action each turn for the duration of the spell. You have to take a bit of a nap the turn after it ends, but the fight should be over by then.

15. Fifteenth level eldritch knights get an Arcane Charge when you use your Action Surge, letting you anime teleport behind someone immediately before or after your second action, to make sure the enemy knows it’s “nothing personnel, kid”.

16. Use this ASI to round up your Dexterity and Wisdom for better saves and a higher AC. You also learn Counterspell, because your scythe is literally sharp enough to cut magic. I’m sure Medea isn’t jealous at all.

17. Seventeenth level fighters get an extra use of Action Surge and Indomitable. Not much else to say about this level. You’re just you, but better.

18. Your last eldritch knight goody continues the trend of “you, but better” with Improved War Magic, letting you attack as a bonus action after casting any sort of spell. Hit some people, action surge, cast hold person on them while they’re weak, then hit them again for more fun.

19. Use your last ASI for more Constitution for better concentration and more HP. You also learn the spell Stoneskin for even more defense, giving you resistance to physical damage types.

20. Your last level gives you yet another Extra Attack, giving you four attacks per action or eight with action surge. You also get your last spell, Protection from Energy, which can give you resistance to one type of damage: acid, cold, fire, lightning, or thunder, for up to an hour.

Pros:

Normally hold person’s “save every turn” weakness would be an issue, but thanks to eldritch strike you can use it effectively for crowd control. Hit people, freeze them in place, then hit them some more!

You’re also pretty mobile, with 40-50 feet of movement and teleportation making it hard to pin you down for retaliation.

On top of all of that, you’re strongly resistant against magic, with ways to cheat spell saves and reduce damage even further with Protection from Energy.

Cons:

Using daggers, scythes, and whips to represent your chained weapons is fine and all, but it does mean all your attacks only do 1d4 damage. Even paralyzing your enemies for guaranteed crits isn’t going to make you scary.

Eldritch Knight spell slots only go up to level 4, so you won’t be able to cast Flesh to Stone. Maybe the big you can do it...

Your mobility spells, Hold Person, and protection spells all use concentration, so you’ll only be able to do one of those at a time.

#fgo #Fate Grand Order #D&D 5e #Medusa #Fate and Phantasms #Fighter

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gonbe-nyanya · 4 years ago

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How to Actually Play Magic: The Gathering

Magic: The Gathering (MTG, or just Magic) is the first and one of the most popular trading card games in the world. Described as the chess of card games, you can go as complex as you want (even make a computer) or have as much fun as you want, diving into the multitudes of worlds, creatures, and characters to express yourself.

But first you need to know how to play.

Lots of guides tend to be overly simplistic, so here I’ll try to go really in-depth in the rules while still maintaining an introductory tone. I will also try to provide as many pictures of relevant cards as possible to expose you to the vast array of effects cards may have, and how they interact with what I’m currently discussing.

1. The Colors of Magic

The most defining part of Magic are the five different colors. Each has its own flavor, playstyle, advantages, and disadvantages. You can combine different colors in your deck to have access to interesting combos and to balance out your deck’s weaknesses. Different color combinations also have their own specific flavor, often embodied by groups such as the guilds of Ravnica.

White: This is the color of unity, healing, and order. Cards in this color will often gain you life, protect your creatures from damage, tax or outright prevent your opponents from doing tricky things, and make armies of small creatures that together make mighty fighting forces. It is also associated with artifacts, enchantments, and exiling.

By the way, I will be defining Magic terms as they come up, like so.

Token: A representation of a creature, artifact, or something else. You can use it like a card while it exists, but it will vanish when it leaves the battlefield. (the rest of these terms will come up soon.)

Exile: Originally called “removed from the game”, exile is a zone that is inaccessible to most cards. It makes sure your opponents’ creatures go away forever. Sometimes, creatures go to exile and come right back to get extra enter-the-battlefield effects, known as blinking.

If you see something that isn’t immediately defined, just keep it in mind. Chances are I’ll cover it in a later chapter.

Blue: This color is related to knowledge, water, and the cold. You’ll get to draw lots of cards, but your creatures will be lacking. Instead, you will have access to powerful spells that bounce, freeze, or steal your opponents’ creatures and even give you extra turns. Quelch your opponents’ attempts with counterspells. It also has affinity for artifacts.

Black: This color represents death, disease, and ambition. Full of evil kill and discard spells, you will have access to your own army of zombies, vampires, and demons. You will also be able to do powerful things, but often at the cost of cards, creatures, or even your own health. In the words of Dark Confidant, “Greatness, at any cost.”

Red: This is the color of passion, fire, and explosive power. Many of the direct damage spells, including the iconic Lightning Bolt, are Red, as well as aggressive, fast creatures and multiple combats. You will have an extreme upper hand in your first few turns, but will quickly run out of gas if you don’t use another color to keep up on card draw. Red also brings with it mighty dragons and world-morphing chaotic effects.

Green: The color of nature, Green is similar to white in its abilities to heal, create tokens, and destroy artifacts and enchantments. However, Green has a wild side and is full of giant beasts, swarms of bugs, and rapid evolutions. It also brings out lands quickly and makes tons of mana.

2. Dissecting a Card

Sidisi is a popular character that hales from the plane of Tarkir. She’ll be helping us as a prime example of what a card looks like. There’s a lot to take in, but we’ll start from the top and work our way down.

First is the border (yes, from the very top!). It seems silly, but there are actually a few different borders that mean different things. A vast majority of cards have the regular black border. You may also see cards with white borders - these tend to be older cards, but they’re just as good as the black bordered ones. Silver borders come from the Un-sets, a series of joke sets full of wacky mechanics and inside jokes. None of these cards are tournament legal, but you’re free to have fun with them with your friends. Gold-bordered cards will also have a different back, and were printed as a part of tournament-winning decks back in the day. These are not tournament legal, but since they are often cheaper than their “real card” counterparts, people will use them in casual decks.

Next is the name. “Sidisi, Brood Tyrant” is the full, English name of this card. Each deck can only have up to 4 copies of any single card (there are very important exceptions to this I will cover in the next chapter). There are also a few cards which specifically reference others by name.

To the right of that is the mana cost. In this case, we need to use one black mana, one green mana, one blue mana (each represented by their respective symbol) and one mana which can be of any color, or even colorless, represented by the 1 in the circle. We’ll find out how to get mana in the next chapter as well. As a side note, many cards will consider the mana value (formerly, converted mana cost), which is just the total cost of the card as a number. For Sidisi, it’s four.

Beneath that is the art.

Arguably the most important part of any card, Magic’s art is what really sets it apart from other games. People fall in love with specific cards for their dramatic poses, mighty beings, and stunning vistas. The art brings character to every card, and ties flavor and function beautifully. This is the best way to express yourself, and find what you really like about Magic.

Next is a thin bar called the typeline. This will tell you first what type of card it is - either a land, creature, artifact, enchantment, planeswalker, instant, sorcery, or tribal (or some combination!), which dictate how you use the card, and what other cards interact with it. Card types can be divided into permanent, which go on the battlefield once played, and nonpermanent, which you play for a single effect and immediately go to your graveyard. There are also some supertypes. Sidisi herself is Legendary, meaning she represents a specific character from Magic lore. This also means you can only have a single copy of her on the battlefield at any one moment; if you somehow get another, you’ll have to sacrifice one. Basic is another important supertype we’ll cover soon.

On the other side of the hyphen is the subtype - this is almost exclusively used for creatures to tell you what tribes they belong to. Sidisi herself is a Naga and a Shaman, and will thus interact with cards that care about that (these are often called tribal effects; for example, “Elves you control get +1/+1″). From Trilobites to Trolls, the creatures of magic are a diverse crowd.

Finally comes the set symbol, that strange orange shield thingy to the right. This tells you two things: the set the card comes from, and the rarity. This specific symbol represents the set Khans of Tarkir, so booster packs from that set may contain Sidisi. Rarity comes in 5 different colors.

Black: Common (Simple, often weak)

Silver: Uncommon (May have cool mechanics)

Gold: Rare (More powerful and complex)

Orange: Mythic Rare (The most powerful and complex)

Purple: Special (This is only used in situations such as Time Spiral, where they reprinted cards in the old border)

The rarity often (but not necessarily) corresponds to power level. It’s better to think of it as a ranking of design complexity. Newer Rares and Mythics will also have that shiny, elliptical sticker near the bottom, which simply guarantees the authenticity of the card.

The bottom half of the card is dominated by the text box. This will tell you the effects and abilities of the card. Sidisi has two abilities: one that triggers whenever she enters the battlefield or attacks, and one that triggers whenever a creature card is put into the graveyard from your library (on modern cards, this is called milling). We will go over abilities later.

Notice how Sidisi aligns with her colors. As a Naga, she is Green. Her zombie tokens are characteristic of Black, and tokens are generally Green as well. Milling is a Blue ability, and putting creatures in the graveyard to bring back to life is definitely Black.

The text box is also home to flavor text, the italicized text beneath the rules. This will often be a little blurb or quote relating to the flavor of the card. Consider it an extension of the art.

Creatures will also have that rectangle to the bottom right, called the Power and Toughness. The first number is the power (how hard it punches) and the second is the toughness (how hard of a punch it can take). This is relevant for combat and we will cover it extensively later.

Finally come all those funny symbols at the very bottom. This will include the collector’s number (199/269), the set (KTK = Khans of Tarkir), the artist (Karl Kopinski) and the copyright.

3. Lands

Lands are by far the most important component of your deck. They are what generate the mana you need to cast your spells, and dictate the colors of spells you can play.

You can play one land per turn - just plop it from your hand onto the battlefield. They have no mana cost, and thus the top right is blank.

The Basic land is the prime exception to the four-card limit, as you can have as many as you want in your deck. The Basic supertype also interacts with several cards, such as ones which let you get more from your deck onto the battlefield.

The 6 basic lands are Plains (white), Island (blue), Swamp (black), Mountain (red), Forest (green), and Wastes (colorless, only used in decks such as Eldrazi Tron, and are often not included).

This cycle comes from Lorwyn, a set based in Gaelic mythology.

All Basic lands come with the implied rules text that they can tap to create one mana of their respective color, and as such will often have the cinematic mana symbol instead.

Tap: A common cost on a permanent to activate an ability. Turn the card sideways to tap it. It will stay tapped until your next turn, when it will untap during your untap phase (more on that later). A tapped card can’t be tapped again, and a tapped creature can’t block.

Some lands, especially those that can make different colors, will enter the battlefield tapped, so you’ll have to wait an extra turn to use them. Other lands might only create colorless mana (represented by a number on older cards and a diamond on newer cards), so they’re less useful for casting spells, but will have interesting abilities, such as:

This Mutavault can turn into a creature for just 1 mana, which you can use to attack and block with. (Pop quiz: see if you can recognize each part of the card!) There are dozens more examples that do everything from draw you cards to destroy your opponents’ pesky lands.

But what exactly does it mean to create a mana? Well, really, it gets added to your mana pool, as you may have noticed on the Mutavault. This is an arbitrary place where all your mana goes so that you can spend it. This isn’t often relevant, because you’ll mostly tap your lands while casting spells and the mana will immediately be used, but there are a few scenarios where it might be useful. For example, someone targets your land to destroy it because they don’t want you to have the mana open to kill something they’ll play next. Just tap your land to keep a mana “floating”. However, all the mana in your pool will automatically drain out each time you change phases (more on those later).

Tapping lands for mana is an ability, but since it’s a mana ability, it won’t use the stack, so you can use them just about whenever. More on the stack later as well.

Most decks will be around one-third lands, with more or less depending on how low the average cost of cards you have are. The less colors you run, the less cards you have at your disposal, but the more flexible your mana base can be - more colors often use lands that enter tapped and are inconsistent at drawing the colors they need.

Have fun experimenting with your mana base, especially in casual formats. In more competitive formats, lands are actually the most expensive cards! The top lands are called the shocklands, fetchlands, and original dual lands - the last of which are several hundred dollars each.

4. Permanents

Besides lands, just about every other card you play is considered a spell when you cast it (you’ll see this on cards such as Counterspell). However, for the sake of clarity, I’ll be using “Permanent” to refer to anything that goes directly on the battlefield once it resolves and “Spell” to refer to single-use cards.

Of the card types mentioned above, permanents include lands (which we just covered), creatures, artifacts, enchantments, and the mighty planeswalkers. I’ll include a visual example of each as we go.

Creatures are your basic way of winning the game. They can attack your opponent to take down their life total, but might also have interesting abilities that make them more valuable as repeatable spells than combatants.

Incubation druid is a great example of both: she starts off as an additional land, giving you more mana quicker to play your other cards. With 0 power, she’s useless as an attacker. However, her Adapt ability lets her grow into a formidable 3/5, so you can attack and block with her much more effectively later in the game. Notice the curved arrow symbol that represents tapping.

+1/+1 Counter: This is a permanent buff to your creature, giving it an additional power and toughness each. Counters in general can come in many forms: -1/-1 counters are self-explanatory, but ability counters such as a Flying counter give your creature a new keyword. Other counters, such as Lore and Filibuster, keep track of certain things for you. Always bring a few dice with you to every game, as you’re sure to want to track some sort of counter.

Creatures enter the battlefield with summoning sickness, which means they can’t attack or use any ability that requires them to tap until your next turn. Creatures also get summoning sick when they change control. A creature with Haste, a keyword ability, lets you ignore this, and is often found on red creatures.

Artifacts, lore wise, are artificial, sterile creations of wizardry, and as such, almost never correspond to a color. They may imitate the effects of a certain color, but to prevent other colors from having easy access to it, they will often be overcosted. A common type of artifact is colloquially known as the mana rock, as it generates mana. There are many cards that interact and enhance artifacts.

Hedron Archive is a typical mana rock, costing four mana of any color and boosting your mana generation ability by two. Later in the game, if you already have more than enough lands, you can cash it in for two mana to draw some more cards. Notice the distinct metallic border.

Artifacts often combine with Creatures to form Artifact Creatures, or less commonly with Lands to create Artifact Lands.

Artifacts can also come on the form of Equipment, which will give an effect when equipped to a creature. This often comes in the form of a buff to its power and toughness, but can also include adding keywords and other cool abilities. You’ll need to equip it by paying a cost, and can pass equipment around between any of your creatures. This can result in some funny mental images, such as a cat wearing a suit of armor and wielding three swords!

Enchantments are similar to artifacts in that they sit on the battlefield and have an effect, but they will have color. Also, Green and White excel at “cleansing” both by destroying them, but Red is only good at blowing up artifacts - after all, an ogre with a mace can smash a rock, but not a mystical spell.

Some enchantments have the subtype Aura. This means you cast them targeting a specific permanent, and they will enter the battlefield attached to that permanent like a piece of Equipment. These, however, can’t be moved around, and will fall off and go to the graveyard if the thing they enchant ever leaves the battlefield. Auras will often buff creatures, but can also subdue permanents or boost a land’s mana production.

Planeswalkers are the newest and arguably the most powerful of the permanents. They represent the primary characters of MTG lore, beings who have incredible magical prowess and can teleport from plane to plane. They are (as of yet) all legendary, and thus you can only have one of each at a time on the battlefield.

They look pretty weird, don’t they? Instead of a power and toughness, they have a loyalty in the bottom right. Each planeswalker will enter the battlefield with that many loyalty counters on it. You can activate one of its abilities on each of your turns by adding or subtracting the indicated loyalty. Once a planeswalker is at zero, it dies and goes to the graveyard (or rather, gets fed up with your mishandling and teleports away, as per loyalty flavor). Planeswalkers can also be killed by spells that specifically target them, when they’re dealt damage, or when they’re attacked by creatures. Their last ability is often incredibly powerful, and is called an “ultimate”. Newer planeswalkers sometimes also have static abilities.

Planeswalkers are not creatures, and can’t attack or block. That being said, there are some planeswalkers that can turn into creatures.

Permanents are very useful, as they stick around and provide value turn after turn. Many strategies revolve around certain tribes, or using artifacts. Creatures are the main way to get damage through to your opponent to win the game. And planeswalkers have powerful abilities, requiring an answer from your opponent to stay in the game.

5. Spells

As stated above, all nonland cards are technically spells when cast, but here we will talk specifically about Instants and Sorceries. We will also define timing, as instant- and sorcery- speed is something we will discuss often when looking at casting spells, activating abilities, and using the stack.

Sorceries are your basic single-use card. Pay their cost, they’ll resolve, and you’ll get their effect once before they go to the graveyard.

Something I haven’t brought up yet is when you can play cards. We’ll go over the turn structure more in depth, but for now, know there’s a beginning step, a main phase, a combat phase, and a second main phase. You can play any of the previously mentioned cards, including sorceries, and activate planeswalker abilities, whenever it’s your main phase and the stack is empty.

The Stack: Whenever you cast a spell or activate a non-mana ability, or a triggered ability triggers, it will go on the stack. Things on the stack resolve last-in, first-out.

Instants are just like sorceries, but you can cast them at any time you have priority. This means they can go on the stack above other spells, which allows them to interact with other spells. Activated abilities can also be activated whenever, except for planeswalker abilities and those which specify otherwise.

Priority: When you have priority, you will have an opportunity to cast spells, play lands, and activate abilities. Everyone gets priority every phase, and it starts with the active player (whoever’s turn it is) and is passed around in turn order.

Whenever something goes on the stack, priority is passed around as well. Once each player has passed priority, it resolves and priority is passed once again for the next thing.

You can hold priority to cast multiple spells in a row.

Here’s a quick example to see how spells, abilities, and priority all interact on the stack:

Johnny and Timmy are playing each other, and it’s Timmy’s main phase. Johnny has a 0/2 Incubation Druid.

Timmy plays a Bala Ged Scorpion, which goes on the stack. Priority is passed around and it resolves. Its triggered ability goes on the stack, and Timmy targets Johnny’s Incubation Druid, since its power is 0, less than 1.

Since the ability is on the stack, Timmy gets priority and passes it to Johnny. In response, Johnny casts Burst of Strength, maintains priority, and casts a second Burst of Strength. Now priority passes between them for both, and they both resolve. Incubation Druid is now a 2/4.

Priority passes for Bala Ged Scorpion’s ability, but since the Incubation Druid now has more than 1 power, the ability does nothing and fizzles.

Fizzle: A spell whose target is no longer legal does nothing when it resolves. This is colloquially called fizzling.

Assuming he had the mana for it, Johnny could also have activated Incubation Druid’s Adapt ability in response to the Bala Ged Scorpion, making it a 3/5 and also letting it survive.

There are lots of cool things you can do with the stack, such as making slick plays to foil your opponents’ spells or to copy big spells for massive value.

Some permanent cards have Flash. This is a keyword ability that lets you play the card as if it was an instant. Teferi, Mage of Zhalfir is the quintessential Flash card, as it also gives your other creatures flash and prevents your opponents from playing at instant speed.

6. Where are We?

I’ve been throwing around terms such as Graveyard and Battlefield, so what exactly do these mean? Well, these are all zones. We’ve already looked at one zone - Exile. The Stack is also a zone.

A zone is a place where cards can exist. They may have abilities that work while in that zone, most often on the battlefield. Public zones are where all the cards are known. This includes the Battlefield, the Graveyard, and Exile.

Urabrask’s ability only works while he’s on the battlefield, and only creatures you control on the battlefield would get haste - after all, those are the only ones who can use it, anyways. Yixlid Jailer takes away abilities from cards in graveyards, so Momentary Blink would not have Flashback while it’s there. Momentary Blink also exiles a creature (using the old wording of “removed from the game”) and brings it back, known as flickering.

Private zones are anywhere where cards are not public information. This includes your hand and your library. Thoughtseize, and other similar hand disruption spells, let you take a peek at what your opponent has. Loads of cards like Armillary Sphere let you search your library for cards. Others may reveal the top card of your library, or let you look at the top few.

It’s also possible to have “hidden” cards in public zones. Willbender feature the Morph mechanic, which lets you cast it face-down as a 2/2 creature. This means your opponent won’t know what it is until you turn it face up, but you will. Other effects might put cards face-down in exile, where you could cast them.

Whenever a card changes zones, it becomes a new “object”. That means all counters, equipment, and auras fall off, and it is no longer being targeted by anything that was targeting it before. A classic use of this rule is flickering a creature being targeted by a kill spell - even though it comes back to the battlefield, it is a new object and is thus no longer being targeted by the kill spell. The spell will fizzle and your creature will be safe.

7. Starting the Game

Ok. So you’ve got a basic understanding of all the cards and the different locations. How do you get started actually playing?

There are lots of ways to play the game, but I’ll start out with the most common: a 1v1, best of 3 duel. This will also get a little bit into deckbuilding, but there’s a lot more on that later.

Most 1v1 decks will be 60 cards. In fact, this is a lower limit, and you can have as many cards as you want, but it’s convention to stay at 60 cards to maintain consistency. In a best of 3 match, you will also have a sideboard - 15 or less cards that may target specific strategies such as graveyard decks or artifact decks. After your first game and seeing what your opponent is playing, you’ll be able to switch out cards in your deck for the right silver bullets for games 2 and 3.

Common sideboard cards against Burn, graveyard, and artifact strategies.

If you’re playing a casual game with a friend, feel free to omit the sideboard, but it’s a staple part of competitive play and is a fun way to personalize decks in strictly defined metagames.

Now that you’ve got a deck (and presumably, a friend with a deck as well) shuffle up. Cut your opponent’s deck by putting the top half on the bottom (a customary ritual to prevent cheating) and let them cut yours. Figure out who’s going first by rolling some dice (whoever wins gets to choose, but generally going first is preferred), and draw seven cards.

You may not like your hand for several reasons. Maybe you have too many lands, or none at all. Your lands might all produce the same color of mana instead of all the colors you need, or you might have only highly-costed spells and nothing to do on your early turns.

No problem, just shuffle it back in and draw seven more. This is called mulliganing. You can do this as many times as you want, but don’t be too hasty, because once you find a hand you like, you’ll need to put one card from your hand on the bottom of your library for each time you mulliganed.

Now it’s time for your first turn. But before we really get playing, let’s look at the structure of a turn.

8. Phases of a Turn

credit to u/paper_alien

From this fancy diagram, we can see that your turn is broken down into roughly three different parts. I’ll be including examples of cards that interact with each phase. First is the beginning phase.

Your untap step is right at the start, when all your permanents untap. Simply turn them right-side up. Claustrophobia would prevent one of your opponents’ creatures from untapping, rendering it useless as an attacker and blocker, as well as preventing its tap abilities from being used. No player gains priority during the untap step, and play immediately proceeds to the upkeep step.

Normally, nothing happens here, unless an ability triggers. For example, the Luminous Angel gives you a 1/1 token on your upkeep. Players will get priority, so you’ll have a chance to cast instants or activate abilities as well.

After that is the draw step. You immediately draw a card, and abilities like that of Font of Mythos will trigger. Again, priority passes around. Once you’ve finished with the draw step, move on to your main phase.

Side note: Normally, players will typically condense these three steps into one (untapping and drawing), because it’s rare that you do play something here, but the steps are distinct for those cases in which you do need to take an action.

As mentioned above, your main phases are the only times you can play lands and non-instant spells, as well as activate planeswalker abilities. They sandwich your combat phase. It’s uncommon for cards to trigger during your main phases, but the two above are prime examples of such cards. Many activated abilities will also have an explicitly written restriction to only use them during your main phases.

The combat phase is the most complex, as it is really made up of five to six distinct subphases. First, you declare that you are going to move to combat. This will trigger cards like Hazoret’s Favor, and will give your opponents an opportunity to subdue your creatures before they can attack but after you have a chance to cast relevant non-instant cards.

Once priority is passed around, you move to the Declare Attackers step. Here, you will tap each creature you want to have attack, meaning you can only attack with untapped creatures, and declare the player or planeswalker it will be attacking. Creatures do not attack other creatures (this isn’t Hearthstone), and instead your opponent will have a chance to block your creatures with their own.

This happens after priority is passed around and you move to the Declare Blockers step. Your opponent will choose which of their untapped creatures they want to block your attacking creatures. Each creature can block up to one other creature, but any number of creatures can block one creature.

Next is the Damage step. Here, each unblocked creature will deal damage to the player or planeswalker it’s attacking, and each blocked or blocking creature will deal damage equal to its power to the creature(s) it’s been pitted against. If one of your creatures is being blocked by multiple, you need to divide its power among them. For example, a 3/3 being blocked by two 2/1′s must deal 1 damage to one and 2 damage to another. All creatures who have been dealt more damage than their toughness die and are put into the graveyard.

The theoretical sixth step actually occurs before the Damage step - the First/Double Strike step. If any creatures with first strike or double strike are involved in the combat, this step will be created and those creatures will have an opportunity to deal damage before other creatures. For example, if a 5/1 with first strike is blocked by a 3/3, the 5/1 will deal 5 damage to the 3/3 before it has a chance to fight back, and the 3/3 dies. Double strike means the creature deals its damage twice - during this phase and the regular combat phase.

Finally is the End of Combat step. Similarly to the Beginning of Combat step, this is mostly a formality, but some cards do trigger here (such as the Wall of Cinders), and priority is passed around.

Notice that you also get priority after every one of these phases, meaning you have tons of control over what happens. This allows you to play combat tricks. For example, say you attack with a 4/4 and your opponent has a 4/2. They might think you just want to trade creatures (meaning both die) and blocks your attacker. Before damage, you have a chance to play Giant Growth, pumping your creature out of range of your opponent’s creature, so yours survives.

This is also a great time to cover the keyword abilities I’ve been bringing up throughout, as many of them concern combat. Many of them are fairly self-explanatory, and are not exclusive to creatures.

Deathtouch: Whenever this creature deals damage to another creature, that creature dies.

Defender: This creature can’t attack. Often seen on Walls.

First Strike/Double Strike: As mentioned above, these let the creature deal damage before other creatures. Double Strike means it deals damage twice, once in the first strike damage phase and once in the regular phase.

Flash: You can play this card at instant speed. Can appear on any permanent card.

Flying: This creature can’t be blocked except by other fliers and creatures with Reach.

Haste: This creature isn’t affected by summoning sickness.

Hexproof: This can’t be targeted by your opponents’ spells and abilities. This doesn’t prevent it from being affected by “choose” or “all” effects.

Indestructible: This can’t be destroyed by damage or effects that say “destroy”. It can still be sacrificed, exiled, or given -X/-X to reduce its toughness to 0.

Lifelink: Whenever this deals damage, you gain that much life.

Reach: Can block creatures with flying.

Shroud: Like Hexproof, but also prevents you from targeting it (for example, with a pump spell or equipment).

Trample: Excess combat damage can be dealt to your opponent. However, you still need to deal lethal damage to any blockers. For example, a 5/5 with trample being blocked by a 2/3 must deal at least 3 damage to the 2/3 so that you can deal 2 damage to your opponent.

Vigilance: This creature doesn’t need to tap when attacking.

Menace: This creature must be blocked by at least two creatures.

There are many, many more keyword abilities, but these are the most common - the rest you will come across as you explore the different sets and planes.

After your second main phase comes the end step. In reality, you’ll care more about your opponent’s end step, because it is the optimal time to play removal, card draw, or other useful instants because it will give your opponent the least amount of time to react before your next turn. However, once priority is passed during your end step, check if you have more than seven cards in your hand - the maximum hand size. if you do, the cleanup step is created. Here, you must discard down to seven cards, and there will be another chance for priority after that. Seven is the default maximum hand size, but there are many cards that let you play around with that.

So now you’ve got your deck, you’ve mulliganed as you need, you’ve played an Island. I see you preparing to cast that Opt - but wait! Casting a spell is quite a bit more complex than it first seems, so let’s go over that now.

9. Casting Spells and Activating Abilities

All this time, I’ve been talking about casting and activating without really explaining exactly what that means, so now let’s make sure you know what that means. There is a lot of nuance to properly casting a spell, but once you understand it, you can ignore all the decorum in most cases. However, it’s still important to know exactly what happens to prevent common misunderstandings, and because Magic is full of strange cards that love to bend the rules; you will doubtless find fun corner cases.

The steps to casting a spell and activating an ability are identical except the first, so I will be going over them together, referring to casting a spell.

Declare you are going to be casting the spell by putting it from where it is (generally, your hand) onto the stack. An ability will be put onto the stack as an arbitrary object.

Declare all the additional and alternative costs you wish to pay (for example, Vandalblast’s Overload cost), the mode of the card for split cards (such as Assure // Assemble) and double-faced cards (such as Alrund, who is also a bird on his other side!), and define the value of X (such as for Chalice of the Void), which you can pay for in mana of any color.

Choose the targets of your spell. You must have a legal target for each time the word “target” appears on the card (this is when effects such as “When this becomes the target of a spell” are triggered and go on the stack, to be sorted out and resolved later).

Now determine how much you need to pay. This includes cost reductions and additional costs, such as for Torgaar, as well as taxing effects (i.e., “noncreature spells cost {1} more to cast).

Activate mana abilities, such as those from your lands and mana rocks, and pay all costs as required. This means, for example, that you can tap a creature that produces mana and sacrifice it to pay for Torgaar.

Congratulations! Your spell or ability is now on the stack. Abilities that trigger while you are casting your spell, such as Talrand’s, will be on the stack above it and will thus resolve first. We covered fizzling before, but to clarify, a spell will fizzle only if all its targets are no longer legal, either through dying, or gaining Hexproof, or some other means. This means you get no part of its effects. If it has multiple targets, and only some become illegal, the card resolves as normal.

Like I said, you really don’t need to understand all of this in depth, but it helps clarify the occasional odd rules interaction.

10. Abilities

There are four types of abilities that you might find on cards. The one we’ve just covered extensively was activated abilities, which further come in two forms.

Draconic Disciple handily features both: a mana ability, and a normal activated ability. Notice that all activated abilities use the syntax “Cost X, Cost Y: Ability.” As we covered last chapter, you need to use mana abilities before paying costs when activating an ability, so you couldn’t tap Draconic Shaman for mana for his own ability as well as tap him to summon the dragon.

The main distinction for mana abilities is that they don’t use the stack, resolve instantly, and can be used while casting spells. An activated ability is considered a mana ability if and only if all it does is create mana. That means that Deathrite Shaman’s first ability is not a mana ability, because it exiles a land in addition to creating a mana.

The three other types of abilities are triggered abilities, passive abilities, and replacement effects.

Vanquisher’s Banner features a passive ability by giving all your creatures of a certain creature type +1/+1. It’s pretty straightforward: a static ability simply applies as long as the permanent which has it is on the battlefield. There are nuances in “layering”, but this is already far more complex than you’ll need to know for the majority of games. Feel free to read that article, though.

Vanquisher’s Banner’s third ability is a triggered ability - an ability that goes on the stack when something happens. This could be casting a spell, a creature entering the battlefield, or drawing a card - or just about anything. These are generally in the form “When” or “Whenever”, and should not be confused with replacement effects.

Replacement effects, like the one seen on Teferi’s Ageless Insight, come in the form “If... would... instead”. They are similar to triggered abilities in that they occur in response to something happening, but they don’t use the stack. Instead, think of them as modifiers to abilities. For example, if Teferi’s Ageless Insight was formatted like a triggered ability, drawing you a card each time you drew a card, you’d be stuck in an endless loop of drawing. Instead, replacement effects only apply once to each thing they modify.

There are many ways that abilities might manifest themselves, and they don’t always need to be on the battlefield. Bridge From Below’s wall of text works when it’s in the graveyard. Skyscribing’s ability only works from your hand, and is keyworded by Forecast, which only appeared in the original Ravnica set.

The best way to experience all the different interesting abilities and cards is just by playing and expanding your collection. Enjoy playing around and learning more about the game.

This is just about all you need to know to understand the game itself. However, Magic cards just love bending the rules, so you’ll always be encountering interesting rules interactions that will teach you more about the game as you play.

11. Formats

Here is where the fun really begins. Choosing a format is like choosing a social media platform: it comes with its own drama, flavor, speed, and player personalities. All formats use 60 card decks with 15 card sideboards, and start at 20 life, except Brawl and Commander. Each format has its own banlist, so make sure you check that before building just any deck. However, feel free to totally disregard all formats and just build whatever deck you want to have fun with friends!

Here are the most popular formats:

Standard: Probably the most popular 1v1 format, Standard uses cards from the last few sets, and constantly rotates. Deck prices can range from under 100$ to over 500$ when certain powerful cards are in rotation, but when a card rotates out, it can lose its value if it isn’t played in older formats. It can be competitive, but also lets you play with fun new cards in a weaker environment.

Pioneer: The newest official format, Pioneer uses cards dating back to the set Return to Ravnica. It has the same fresh feel as Standard, but doesn’t rotate and is closer in power level to Modern.

Modern: This format uses cards from the newest set all the way back to Eighth Edition from 2003. Decidedly more powerful than Standard, and expensive as well. Competitive decks can range from 200-1000$, but the vast size of the card pool means you can find budget builds and underdog decks to tinker with.

Legacy: You can use any card in the history of Magic, except those from the Banlist. The power level is incredibly high, yet the stereotype of 2-turn games is not as true as one might think. Because of the original dual lands, decks are often over 1000$, but mono-colored decks such as Burn can be brought down to 200$. Definitely not for the faint of heart.

Vintage: Like legacy, all cards are at your disposal, and this time, instead of a banlist, you have a restricted list, meaning you are limited to 1 copy of certain cards. A single copy of Black Lotus can be tens of thousands of dollars, and is a staple alongside the rest of the Power Nine. Very few play it because of the price tag, but it lets you tap into the true power of the oldest Magic cards.

Commander (AKA EDH): Play with any card, like Legacy, but with the distinct Commander banlist. The deckbuilding process here is very different: Pick a legendary creature you like, and pick 99 more cards that are of the same color(s) as your commander. This is a singleton format, meaning you can only have one of each card except for basic lands. Commander is also a multiplayer format, played in pods of 3-6; most often 4. Your commander starts in the Command Zone, where you can cast it. Each time it dies, it goes back to the Command Zone, where you can replay it for an additional 2 mana each time. The multiplayer nature, 40 starting life total, and high variance make Commander incredibly casual, much more a social event than a game. Have fun casting huge spells, playing pet cards, and embodying your commander. That being said, there’s a competitive scene in EDH, known as cEDH.

Brawl: Ah, Brawl. Commander’s younger, forgotten brother. It’s a cross between Commander and Standard, in which you have a commander (in this case, it can also be a planeswalker) and must have singleton copies of cards. Like Standard, you can only use cards from the last few sets, your deck is only 60 cards (no sideboard, though), and games are 1v1. You start with 25 life. Almost nobody plays this in person, but it’s very fun on MTG Arena.

12. Where to Play

Assuming you don’t have a group of friends ready to accept you into their playgroup, finding people to play with can be hard. First, I’d recommend checking Wizards of the Coast’s official Store Locator to find local game stores that might be hosting events and selling cards. If you go to their websites, they’ll often have calendars listing events by date, format, price, and prize. Explore and find one you like. MTG players are generally friendly, and will be willing to accept you into their playgroup, teach you about the game, and maybe even let you borrow a deck!

If you don’t feel like playing in person, there are several online options.

Magic Online (AKA MTGO or MODO) is the primary official way to play. Pay 10$ for an account, and you can buy, sell, and trade cards as if they were real. No really - Magic cards are almost like stocks, and MTGO cards are basically digital versions of Magic cards, so their price will generally mirror their real world counterparts, albeit at a lower price.

Magic Arena (MTGA) is the newest official online game. It only has cards from recent sets, back to Kaladesh, as well as a few odd cards hand-picked for Historic play (a format specific to the game that uses all cards available). Because of the smaller card pool, MTGA is limited to Standard, Brawl, and Historic as the primary game modes. However, it is free to play and your collection can’t be traded, so you collect cards somewhat like Hearthstone.

There are also a few unofficial programs, including Untap.in, XMage, and Cockatrice, which are free and give you access to the full range of cards for testing new decks before you buy them in paper.

Make sure you keep track of MagicFests, official conventions hosted both around the world and online, to meet tons of new people and play in competitive events.

Ultimately, though, many people choose to play at home around the kitchen table with friends and family. Play wherever and however you feel most comfortable; after all, Magic’s best aspect is self-expression.

13. Accessories

Credit: Tolarian Community College

If you’ve visited a local game store by now, you may have noticed that they sell way more than just cards. There are a myriad of accessories you can use to personalize your game and protect your cards.

Dice: from D4′s to D20′s, you can find these in countless colors and styles. Have fun picking your favorite and use them to keep track of life totals, counters, tokens, and more.

Sleeves: These can come in many different colors and designs, but vary wildly in quality. Pick the ones that feel right for you. These will help you shuffle your deck with ease and prevent your cards from getting damaged. Inner and outer sleeves provide additional protection for your most valuable and prized decks.

Deckboxes: Again, tons of variation. The right deckbox for you will depend on how many cards you want to fit in it, if you want space for dice, the design, and much more.

Playmats: These provide a sleek surface for you to easily pick up, tap, and move your cards around. Pick ones with your favorite Magic art, or order one with your own.

Trade Binders: Once you’ve built up a collection, you might have a few valuable cards you want to show off. Put them in a trade binder, and approach people to find other neat cards you might need.

Tolarian Community College on Youtube provides the best reviews of popular accessories, rating and testing them thoroughly. He also dishes out incredible commentary on new sets and the state of the game. Probably the most popular MTG Youtuber out there.

14. Further Resources

You’ve made it this far, but there’s still so much to explore! Here, I’ll be listing plenty of websites that are excellent resources to expand your understanding of the game.

The official rules: Quite dry, but this is where to go if you ever find a confusing interaction.

Tolarian Community College: I just discussed him, but I must reiterate how awesome his channel is.

Scryfall: A powerful search engine for all the Magic cards you might be looking for. What I’ve been using for card images this whole time. WOTC’s official Gatherer pales in comparison.

TCGPlayer: My favorite way to order cards online, but alternatives include Card Kingdom, StarCityGames, and ChannelFireball.

MTGGoldfish: An excellent all-round resource for keeping track of metagames, card prices, and interesting articles and gameplay. You can also use it to find, build, and share decks and see their prices.

EDHREC: This site conglomerates EDH decks from around the internet to give you a condensed list of the best cards by commander. A must-have resource when building new commander decks.

Last but not least, the best way to learn to play Magic is to watch others. I started out by watching gameplay from Grand Prix’s and other competitions on Youtube. Even though I barely knew what the cards were, I quickly picked up the most popular ones, learned common play patterns, and more. You don’t need to be a pro to learn from them.

15. Have Fun!

Yeah, it’s cheesy, but as I’ve reiterated, Magic is a game of self-expression. With thousands of cards to pick from, plenty of formats, styles, and accessories, customize your play experience as much as you want and be comfortable with that. Meet new people, participate in trading, and play in local events. Magic is what you make of it, so make it the best it can be.

#mtg #magic the gathering #mtg guide

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jq37 · 5 years ago

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The Royal Report– A Crown of Candy Ep 14 Encounter in the Ice Cream Temple

We All Scream

We return to the Ice Cream Temple after the absolute bombshell that the SPF engineered Jet’s death as a way to get the Candians to her lair and gear up for the fight that that revelation obviously triggered. We get a better idea of the battlefield with the amazing Rick Perry set--like even by his standards it’s amazing, fog is involved. The party is on a ledge on one side of the room and there are huge levitating Popsicles and ice cream cones between them and a massive tower of frozen desserts which has the chocolate egg stuck in it in a little alcove.

As the fight begins, the SPF quickly cycles through all her glamours before revealing her true form, a huge, blue/purple, many-faced, many-winged, angelic type being--but angel in the, “We’re saying ‘be not afraid’ not as a formality but because we know we look scary,” sense. And with a Nat 20 initiative she goes to cast something in a cone that would have hit everyone for 8d8 damage but Rina dispels it with a clutch 5th level Counterspell (rolling exactly the DC without even adding her mod), absolutely foiling Brennan. In celebration, she finally puts the crown on Amethar tossed to her a couple of eps back.

Cumulus does some crazy monk movement to jump all the way across to the alcove with the egg. Unfortunately, the SPF immediately uses a legendary action to hit him with with a Ray of Frost for 27 damage and then gets a lair action to skewer him with an icicle, fully dropping him to death saves. The one small mercy is that Cumulus falls towards the egg, not into the mist.

Liam takes some shots at the SPF, and learns that she has both a really high AC and some kind of Mirror Image spell going to take some of her hits. He also eats the Peppermint Heart Seed the SPF returned to them, hoping it will give him flight like it did to Preston (almost jumping off the ledge to test it) but Brennan rolls on the Wild Magic Table and it instead makes the entire party Invisible.

Ruby (at Brennan’s mischievous suggestion) jumps off the edge so she’ll be in range to use Mage Hand, ties it to the end of the rope to the closest floating Popsicles (the orange one), and hangs on. In the distance, she can hear her aunts cheering for her. The SPF blasts her with some cold damage, insisting she just wants to take her somewhere safe but Ruby is having none of that.

Amethar throws some javelins which just gets rid of some of the illusions. The SPF does some more damage to Ruby.

Theo, student of Lazuli, realizes that the SPF is like a dragon sitting atop all this magical treasure but she’s not the source of the magic per se and they should be able to get the floating Popsicles to move at their command. He tells everyone and then holds his turn to see if Rina does anything crazy. Rina Thundersteps herself and Theo to the Popsicle Ruby is hanging onto and uses Winterscoop like an oar to try and move it (DC 10 Wis check w/ advantage--Brennan’s one small mercy). She gets it and yells to her guys to jump onto the other Popsicle (the red one) but they aren’t able to move it. With the rest of his held turn, Theo cast Protection From Evil and Good on Rina.

The SPF tries to blast Rina’s group with another cone attack but Rina stops it cold (ha) with another Counterspell, viably breaking Brennan.

Cumulus fails a death save. Theo takes some cold damage which he lessens with Absorb Elements. Then the SPF casts a spell on Ruby, entering her mind and saying, “You came to me in the glade. Wherever you go, I go.” And she hears a scream from Jet as the SPF begins stitching her own shadow to Ruby. (Spooky, hate that!)

Liam jumps on the red Popsicle and attacks the SPF again, getting rid of the last of her protective illusion.

Ruby swings up to where Cumulus and the egg is. She the rope to Cumulus and pushes him off the edge (Zac’s Face: *Immediate Concern*) so they can pull him up and help him. She also does an Insight check on the egg and feels that the outside is cold but there’s a deep rumbling from within.

Amethar jumps onto the red Popsicle and is finally able to move it. He gets closer to the SPF to throw some javelins and gets a hit this time but, unfortunately, as the SPF is hit, an identical wound dealing half damage appears on Ruby. Ruby yells this info to everyone else.

Theo again delays his action to wait for Rina to act. Rina Healing Word’s Cumulus both because he’s down and to boost her movement by ten (she gets that free 10 feet of Fly when she casts a spell) and she uses that movement to get within range of the egg and cast Bonfire (a cantrip) on the egg (Ruby insisting she could have done it without help). Brennan, womped thrice, needs a 12 or higher on 2d8 to damage the egg. Rina gets a 13 on the dice without having to even do any Sorcery shenanigans.

The egg cracks, releasing hot steam, the smell of cinnamon and the most ADORABLE baby dragon that imprints on Rina immediately. Rina coos that she finally has a family.”

“That is mine,” the SPF says.

“Not anymore,” Rina replies.

Ruby’s Big Day

Jon Bon nails the SPF with a throwing ax, doing half damage to Ruby again.

The SPF does a ton of damage to the red Popsicle peeps and Swifty and Gooey look ROUGH.

Cumulus (after determining that the SPF connection with Ruby will fade soon) jumps and grapples the SPF, doing a successful Stunning Strike, but the SPF uses a legendary resistance to come out of stun and then attacks him, paralyzing him and leaving him to fall.

Ruby tries to figure out if she can do something and Rina says if she trusts her and holds her action, she can do something to help. But it’s not necessary because, on his turn, Liam hits the SPF with a crossbow bolt (Ruby takes no damage as the connection has faded) and then moves the Popsicle under where Cumulus is going to land. The SPF hits Liam for 25 points of damage, taking him down to 9.

Even though she doesn’t need it to save Cumulus anymore, Ruby still delays her turn to get movement help from Rina (reluctantly). Amethar catches Cumulus out of the air before he hits the Popsicle and then does almost 50 points of damage to the SPF with Payment Day now that he’s in melee range.

Theo moves the orange Popsicle closer to where the action is happening, Misty Steps to the floating ice cream cone between his Popsicle and the other one, then tries to boomerang his sword to hit the SPF, but it doesn’t hit.

Rina (slipping into a very Fig manner of speech for a second) asks Ruby, “You wanna go for a ride?” Ruby accepts and Rina (after telling Cinnamon--the newly christened dragon--to fly over to her when he has a chance) Thundersteps herself and Ruby over to the very crowded orange Popsicle with the SPF. She also casts Create Bonfire on the SPF which does double damage--24.

And Ruby decides to take her held turn.

She casts Green Flame Blade on Flickerish--Jet’s sword--and says, “For Jet, bitch.”

Yak flies over to give her advantage (and make this as cinematic as possible).

Nat 20 bay-bee!

So she’s getting extra dice from Green Flame Blade, Rogue Sneak Attack, Flickerish’s Superiority Dice, and the Nat 20. Siobhan is rolling a DM number of dice here and you truly love to see it.

Brennan, sensing that, writes a number on a folded piece of paper and hands it to her. The amount of HP the SPF has left. Then he has her roll in the Box of Doom. She lets those colorful dice fly and counts them up--while Brennan looks on with increasing consternation in the background.

59.

She opens the piece of paper.

52!

Ruby lands graceful, balancing with her circus training, shadow of Jet being cast tall on the wall of the cavern.

“Can’t you come home with me?” asks the SPF.

“Why don’t you come home with me?”

Ruby thrusts the sword forward and the SPF (who Brennan says was literally just about to use her 9th level spell slot to cast Wish and restore all her HP) is no more.

Cold Shoulder

Fight over, the mist begins to clear. They see the floor of the cavern is just magical items on magical items and Swifty is stoked as hell. The magic of this place goes from painfully freezing cold and sickly sweet to the good kind of crisp cold and welcoming availability.

Ruby in her ear hears 4 voices:

“Proud of you, kid.”

“You make it look effortless. I am so proud.”

“Sweetheart, I don’t know where we’re going next. It was nice to be here, but we’re gonna go somewhere we don’t know, but we’re gonna go there together.”

“I was fourth in line and I didn’t know that we were all gonna say something. They didn’t tell me.”

“Look after her please,” Ruby says.

“I wouldn’t dream of doing anything else.”

Then she feels the embrace of her shadow and it returns to its place.

(“I love you so much. I’m sorry I couldn’t save you.”)

Rina says to Ruby that she could have finished off the SPF herself but she wanted to let her have the killing blow because it clearly meant a lot to her. She doesn’t know if that will mean anything to her now and she feels that maybe she’s wasting her time continually trying to reach out to her but maybe, someday, it will get through to her.

Rina’s guys escort her away and she can tell that Gooey has something on her mind. Rina gives her permission to speak freely and Gooey (with Swifty and Jon Bon chiming in) basically says, “Fuck the Candians. They treat you like shit. We’re your real family. You’re gonna be a dope ass queen.”

“You know, it’s funny. That’s the first time someone has called me queen and it hasn’t felt uncomfortable. It actually felt really good.”

Ruby takes another moment of silence for Jet. Theo says that it was always Jet’s dream to be fighting with and for the common people which is Rina’s whole thing. They should be rallying behind her. Ruby and Amethar never even wanted to rule--now he gets to be a warrior again like he wanted. Amethar shoots back with his perspective on the last 4 weeks: his daughter died, he died twice, he decided he was gonna finally man up and bam, it turns out he’s not even king anymore. So excuse him for not being the most gung ho person in the world.

Theo says that he trusts that Amethar is on board but Rina doesn’t know him. From her POV, this is just unprovoked shunning.

“You have two living daughters.”

Ruby goes to talk to Rina and, on a Nat 20 Insight, sees that all her guys are fully ready to remorselessly kill her if given the order. Still, she presses on, laying out her cards: Her entire worldview has imploded in a matter of weeks. Her twin sister just died. She’s going through so much and now this too? She can’t accept Rina as both her sister and her queen. She has to pick one.

“I understand that you lost everything,” Rina says, “but I was born with nothing.” She says that she was actually very excited to meet Ruby and have a sister and finally not be alone anymore, tears cracking through her cold facade for a moment. But then she gathers herself.

“If I must choose, then I choose to be your queen.”

“Very well.”

Rina and her crew exit the Temple and start down the mountain. Everyone except for Liam follows them. Liam goes to check on the hoard and rolls a 24 Investigation check. At the base of the tower he sees an old lair with ancient chocolate eggshells. He knows this is the dark space from his dreams and he knows this was once a dragon lair. At the center of the nest (which is still somehow warm), there’s a little ember that glows brighter as he approaches. It grows red and bright, filling his vision, a hand reaches out, grabs his throat and pulls and we end the ep!

Medal of Honor

Killing a god should be enough to get anyone this spot.

But killing a god with only a 7 point margin on a Nat 20 in order to avenger your sister’s death with her own sword a turn before said god was about to down a Full Restore?

Ooh, man. All hail Princess Ruby Rocks baby!

Things I’m Concerned About

OK, I mentioned last week I was worried about Rina doing a Cat's in the Cradle but I said I’d elaborate later and what I feared seems to be materializing so I’m going to talk about it now. Rina clearly had a certain vision of what she wanted this family reunion to look like and, for valid reasons, it’s not happening that way. They’re not really bonding. So what this ends up being is them relying on her in battle but brushing her off socially--at least that’s what it looks like from her POV. And like, she’s been around for like 2 days so it’s kind of unreasonable for her to expect them to be fully on board already but I see where she’s coming from. If I grew up as basically a Dickensian orphan and a princess told me a sob story (however valid) I wouldn’t be impressed. It would be a complicated situation even without a war happening in the background. On top of that, Rina is surrounded by Yes-Men which concerned me from the start when Gooey pulled her aside that first time. The last time we had the potential for serious party conflict in D20 (not counting Bloodkeep because I maintain that, despite the setup and Brennan’s best efforts, that was never going to happen) was the Kingston/Pete situation and that ended up fizzling out but idk man. That conversation Rina had about how it felt kinda nice to be called queen? That def set off some alarm bells in my head. I don’t know enough about GoT to know if this is a totally valid statement but when she got the dragon and then that convo happened I was like...hmm...how does Dany’s story end again?

Lol also, whatever the heck is going on with Liam and the dragon. Really this should be first but, I’m gonna be real, the Rina thing was so much that I fully forgot this was a thing that also happened.

I’m concerned about whatever happens next ep that was so bad they’ve been talking about it for ages. Feeling pretty trepid about that my guys.

We haven’t heard from Annabelle and Primsy in a while and that doesn’t necessarily mean anything bad but...hmm...

Five A Few More Things

Ah yes, the return of the, “Why can’t a butterscotch bird help me perform first aid?” argument. “Are you telling me a bird can’t save someone’s life?”

“Give me the child.” Brennan, I know I say this a lot but if anything happens to Cinnamon...a single thing...a solitary hitpoint...Brennan…

There's a bit where Cumulus rolls like a 9 and Ally goes, “Can he get advantage from the egg?” And Siobhan makes a face like, “Fully what?” but then a second later is like, “That’s a great question,” totally straight-faced and it’s so funny.

I wonder if Rina’s peeps feel the way they do about the whole party? Because Theo is honestly (in Murph’s words) also one of her goons practically and Cumulus pledged the orders’ services to her. You’d think they’d get consideration.

When Cinnamon gives Rina a Help action she goes, “I’ve never gotten Help action before,” and I understand what she meant but also, lol, she gets Help actions like every turn from her guys.

“Don’t come after my distant cousin!”

Very happy that if combat is happening in our story eps we’re getting some story in our combat eps. Getting a significant chunk of immediate aftermath is very cool and something I often wished for in the other main seasons.

FYI: Celestial is Liam’s Greater Favored Enemy.

Brennan really does love to undercut the tenseness of the situations of his dark world by reminding us all that it’s also deeply stupid and made of candy and I think that’s great.

One More Thing

Two big fandom art things are happening right now that I want to shout out:

(1) Until the 24th, D20 is accepting CoC fanart for their finale montage. The email is [email protected] and the details are on their Twitter.

(2) A fan run event is also happening--as big bang (which is a fanfic-visual art team-up thing that I’m learning about for the first time but seems really cool). Info for that is here.

#dimension 20 #dimension 20 spoilers #a crown of candy #a crown of candy spoilers #the royal report

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jamiebluewind · 5 years ago

Text

Charatcter Descriptions and Summary 2.15

This is the "short" version of descriptions. I have a much MUCH longer one with lots of quotes that I might have to split up to fit. As always, let me know if I need to edit or add anything and tag/ask/PM me about art and stories so I can check them out!

Warning: multiple blood mentions, torture, imprisonment, violence, stabbing, gun violence, canon typical violence, injuries, burns, homophobia and bigotry, gore mention, horror (including body horror), beheading, violence against animals, 69 mention, and disrespecting a mummy

***

Bad Kids

Fabian

Fandrangor stats: +2 to attack and damage. Finesse, one handed. 1d8 piercing. Burn a spell slot on a sucessful hit to add an extra d6 of damage per level.

Wrapped Alistair's foot in his sheet to trip and flip him up before deeply stabbing him in the abdomen

Held his sheet out to further protect Adaine.

Slashed Dayne with a reposte (while also burning a 1st level spell slot on his sword) as he yelled "Toxic masculinity is dead! I dance now!"

Closed in on Penelope using an athletics check that involved jumping and running across the deck. His mobile flourish pushed her to the edge of the deck before he kicked her off the ship.

Took out Alistair and Penelope (details in their section)

Stood at the helm after Bill fell off, turning the ship over due to the gravity being off

Riz

Hissed at Vraz

Got so sweaty and nervous over a terrible line ("You attacked the wrong guy!") that he missed the greesers

Shot Dayne from hiding while saying "You missed spring break" before hiding again (Fabian responding "Classic The Ball. Always shooting from hiding").

Had no clue where his father actually was, telling Bill the little thathe knew.

Got sleepy while he was hiding

Was shot out of the cannon and blasted off into the city (taking some damage). Shouted "I'm the ball!" as he flew away before smashing through a dark red and black stained glass window 200 feet below the ship, tumbling into a strangly familiar building. The room was empty due to all the devils hearing the alarms and fleeing. He rushed down a familar dark hallway.

Witnessed his father being tortured and saying that he didn't care about his son, but still misty steped into the room with the unconscious Pok the minute the devils left.

Tried to scoop his dad up into his Briefcase of Holding, but the two barbed devils came back (snarling as they saw him), one grabbing his briefcase and the other grappling Riz to restrain him. He kept trying to save Pok anyway even while restrained and fought against the devils over his briefcase (see Pok area for more)

Kristen

Rolled up sleeves over Daybreak attacking Tracker

Walked up to Daybreak with anger in her veins (over him hurting Tracker), said "Hi Daybreak. It's so great to see you. I've been PRAYING FOR YOU!", and slammed her staff down, using distructive wave. Light radiated out of her as every enemy was hit but Penelope (due to Globe of Invulnerability) and Johnny Spells and took out 3 Scarecrows. She then spat on Daybreak which hisses on his cheek as he yelled "Ah! Love! Love wins!"

Was knocked out by Daybreak and was back in Silvar looking at a nice tree

Used a 4th level mass healing word before her and Tracker dimension doored away from Daybreak

Adaine

Arcane Hand works like a claw machine with a controler in her hands

While prone, shot a lightning bolt at Dayne, Penelope, and a Scarecrow (after counterspelling Penelope's counterspell). Took out the Scarecrow.

Hit Daybreak with a 4th level Cromatic Orb (cold damage).

Smacked Johnny's fire spell out of the air with a counterspell after calling him "a predator who didn't fuck" and then ignored Johnny completely to go after Daybreak by hitting him with a 4th level (cold) chromatic orb

Used Forceful Hand to grab Bill to keep him from falling (two of the devils stayed grapped to Bill)

Fig

Tried to shake Gilear awake

Fig The Unfaethable

Her insignia burned in her head when she used psionic blast (took out two Scarecrows)

Winked at Ayda

Used Healing Word on Kristen

Attacked Daybreak with Bombing Blade (adds bardic for extra and if he moves willinging before her next turn he takes thunder damage)

Took out Daybreak (details in his section)

Was tossed by Gorgug towards a plummeting Bill like a missile before backpacked onto Bill, snatching a scroll from Vraz's pocket (Vraz: No no no no no! / Bill: What's yours is ours.), and Dimension Dooring back to the ship with Bill.

Gorgug

Stood over Kristen's unconscious body to protect her

Used Reckless Attack twice on Daybreak, the first time dealing 50 damage and the second time ("I'm just so tired of you") another 48 damage.

Took out Dayne (details in his section) and two Scarecrows

Grabbed some holy oil to take with him to coat his weapon with.

***

Familiars and Companions

Boggy: Hit by Penelope's Cone of Cold which caused him to freeze, crack, and fall apart (can be brought back by Adaine)

Gaf: Made incorporial by Ayda to protect him/her/them during the battle

Baby: Was made invisible by Fig. Tried to pickpocket Vraz, but just got a scrap of some kind. Did a very indecent celebration dance while invisible (when Penelope was "killed").

Hangman: Freaked out over seeing Johnny before siding with Fabian. Leapt to attack Johnny Spells, but couldn't make it and settled for slamming into the greeser Sorching Ray. Frozen and knocked down by Penelope's Cone of Cold.

Hirelings and Partners

Tracker

Stayed behind on Goldenrod

Held up a hand with her holy symbol to summon Twilight Sanctuary (gives everyone a d8 of temp hit which they can choose to replace or keep each round).

Cast Beacon of Hope

Knocked out by Penelope's Cone of Cold (which also ended her two spells)

Hit Kristen with a max level cure wounds, yeling at everyone to look away as she jumped onto an unconscious Kristen who was lying between Gorgug's legs (Kristen started touching his leg thinking it's Tracker's). Everyone assumed they were 69ing, but Tracker actually just gave Kristen a very sweet kiss on the mouth and said "Double clerics baby. Nobody can keep us down for long."

Went into flying wolf form to catch Kristen when she fell off the ship.

Ragh

Took out two Scarecrows, goring one before tossed them the ship and spartan kicking the other off the deck.

Ran up to a prone Dayne chanting hoot growl and yelled "I've done a lot of shit in my life because of you asshole!" as he bodied into him (nat 20).

Walked up to Fabian and Gorgug crying after Dayne was killed.

Instigated a three way chest bump with Fabian and Gorgug, not noticing Adaine who was forced to duck ("Oh god! The jocks are being fiesty!")

Was yelled at by Daybreak which he used as an opportunity to confront Daybreak both verbally and physically.

Ayda

Cast a spell that poured out massive amounts of water over Avernus in an attempt to flood hell (in retaliation for them taking Fig) before checking on Fig

Touched both of Fig's arms as she checked if she was okay before casting Protection From Evil And Good on her.

Flew off Goldenrod to help Sandra Lynn protect the ship from incoming fire by throwing up abjurative wards, but came back and landed on the deck before the ship left Avernus.

Flew towards Daybreak and Penelope, teleporting multiple times per second to create a flickering group of 10 of her before slashing out with her talons to damage them both.

Cast clairvoyance to find Riz, pointing at the building he was in.

Used her portent to save Fabian when Goldenrod lost gravity (allowing him to hold on) before flying to catch Adaine.

Sandra Lynn

Left the Goldenrod to cover their tail, doing a swan dive off deck (which looked likes she flew up from the upside down deck) and landing on Baxter before knocking a teleportation missile out of sky with her arrow.

Smashed back down onto the deck with Baxter before healing a down Tracker (Kristen: Thank you Sandra Lynn!)

Hit Daybreak with arrows.

Jumped on Baxter when the ship lost gravity and went to help catch Kristen.

Gilear

Was immediately killed by Bill Seacaster who shot him in the chest.

Brought back by Kristen with 1 hp, a bleeding chest wound, and covered in cenders and fire

Was told by Gorgug (who stood in front of him) to lie on the ground

Hid in the golden sarcophagus (somehow lifting the massive lid to do so)

***

The Pirates

The Goldenrod

The still "living" transmogrified body of Kalvaxus turned into a flying ship against his will

Kalvaxus has to swallow down the cannon coming from his mouth to talk and turning always hurts him

Shot by Bill for calling himself a boat instead of a ship

Captained by Bill Seacaster, crewed by cender zombie pirates, and the flagship of Bill's rebel armada of dragon carcus ships

The ship has it's own gravity and can sail in any direction (including upside down), but the unsecured barrels on deck are a hazard during fast turns.

Able to breached through to Dis, Bill having some way to travel through the levels that the other devils couldn't find

Broadsided The Iron City, firing tons of gold, holy water, and saints finger bones wrapped in old parchment out of it's cannons.

Captain Bill Seacaster

An enormous devil with one cender eye, a devil bone hook, and a floating skull and crossbones insignia over his head

At the helm of Goldenrod after rescuing Riz, Fig, Gilear, Hangman, and Baby/Wretchrot (via being yanked up on rope ladders to the Goldenrod).

Part of his multi level marketing scheme was to have pirates steal holy relics for spell slots and then use the holy relics as ammo against other devils and their ships.

Shot Gilear throught the chest on sight

Got a chain wrapped around his neck by Kystrona

After Gilear was brought back to life by Kristen, he said nice things to Gilear and gave him a massive glowing sword (which was too big for Gilear to wield). The bad kids were all deeply confused by how quickly he went from one extreme to another.

Offered Kristen snuff powder

Ordered his crew to shoot Riz out of a cannon to "help" him look for Pok

As his hook hand was stabbing into one of the three devils he was fighting, he took a legendary action to shake his fist and yell "That's my darling boy!" over Fabian "killing" Penelope. He corrected himself to yell "He's his own his darling man boy!"

When the gravity on the Goldenrod was dispelled, he told Fabian to take the helm before letting go on purpose, taking the three other devils with him (rescued by Adaine and Fig).

Alistair Ash

An intern on the Goldenrod

Skull is cracked open like an egg with part of it fully missing. Inside the socket is roiling fire. His eyes are rotted out, the fire shining through his sockets.

Attacked Fabian exclusively due to being left behind by him

How he was finished off: Fabian stood up, his body very bloody and burned from the beating he's took. Fire enshrouded his sheet as he wrapped Alistair in it in order to spin him like a top. As Alistair twirled in the air, the Hangman hit him in a flash. As Alistair popped of the wheel of the Hangman, Fabian took out Fandrangor (which was rippling with his own inner light and magic) and pierced Alistair's ribcage up through his heart. Silver motes of light burst out of Alistair's mouth, "eyes", and the empty socket of his skull. Bill cried a single tear out of his non ember eye as he said "It be beau-ti-ful". Fabian told his father "I'm my own man now." to which Bill answered "The story keeps getting better!" Meanwhile, Alistair changed his opinion on Fabian, seeing him as chosen one and (since he had to die for Fabian to become who he was) himself as chosen in a way. Fabian asked if Chungle Down Bim was still alive, but Alistair only yelled "He's gonna shit in your mouth!" before being destroyed. One of the many bottles on Bill's belt filled with a red mist that was Alistair, now even more in debt to Bill with another 2000 gold added to his tab to bring him back in another form later.

Cinder Pirates

The crew of the Goldenrod, most (if not all) of which being victims of Bill's pyramid scheme

Assended from ropes to their respective ships after raiding The Bottomless Pit, yoinking up crates and boxes filled with treasure (like books and weaponry) as they went.

Loaded the cannons of The Goldenrod with holy relics, books, golden reliquaries, holy water, and even the body of a dead saint (who was unceremoniously dumped out of his golden sarcophagus). All the relics almost looked like they were from other worlds.

Bill doesn't do the best job putting his followers back together, so most are in worse shape than Alistair. One was missing his entire jaw!

Most were finished off by Penelope's Cone of Cold

***

Bill's Pursuers

Devil Crafts

Iron zeppelins piloted by devils in pursuit of Seacaster.

Shoot ground to air missiles that shot spinning pentagrams of fire teleportation that glowed when they hit, teleporting in reinforcements.

Vraz The Mean, Lorzug The Impaled, and Kystrona The Chained

All appeared through a dimension door at the helm of the ship before the three devils began fighting Bill.

Vraz (after Fig denied a direct order) released all warlocks under Gortholax by making all his contracts null and void.

All of them (including Bill) do tramendous amounts of fire and poison damage, but all of them (including Bill) are immune to fire and poison, so the fight devolved into a bunch of very dangerous people who can't hurt each other just slapping the hell out of each other.

***

Greesers

Johnny Spells

Appeared via teleportation missile with his crew

Roiling in flame with veins glowing in a red light, using a snap comb to brush his hair back and wearing a black leather jacket with a clean white tee.

Hit Fabian with Ray of Fire and then was IMMEDIATELY tossed off the starboard side of the ship by Adaine using her Arcane Hand.

Was saved by Kystrona (via animate chain) before he fell to his "death"

Spent an entire turn to get back on the ship only to have his fire spell dismissed by Adaine.

How he was finished off: Flew off the ship (again) when it lost gravity, saying "No! I had stuff. I had plans. I had-" as he fell to his "death".

Johnny's Crew

Six teiflings greasers who appeared via teleportation missile wearing black leather jackets with clean white tees.

Two trampled over a dead Gilear to get to the teens.

How they were finished off: One was gored by Ragh before being tossed off the ship, one was spartan kicked off the deck by Ragh, two were killed by Gorgug, and two were destroyed by Fig's psionic blast

***

Harvestmen & Friends

Penelope Everpetal

Got to Goldenrod via teleportation missile with Dayne, Daybreak, and four Scarecrow Harvestmen.

Had sunken deep pools of darkness for eyes. She wore a burnt prom queen dress. Jagged shards of metal were stabbed into her skull like a crown (which caused blood to trickle down).

Was protected from magic most of the fight due to casting Globe Of Invulnerability

Stepped forward with a corny line ("Oh I'm so sorry guys. It's time to chill out.") before casting Cone of Cold which took out Tracker, Boggy, Hangman, and most of Bill's crew.

Was knocked off the ship by Fabian and fell down into the sky over the Iron City of Dis, shreaking and wailing as she went. Saved herself by using Misty Step to get back to the ship.

How she was finished off...

Penelope: *appeared in a twirl of magic and hit Fabian with a Firebolt, knocking him down to 4HP* I'm so sorry that you had like... some sort of collapse and appear to be fighting with a blanket now, but I just wanna tell you something. We are gonna drag you and all your shitty stupid little- what? Bad kid friends to hell. Forever.

Fig: I actually already live here. I'm an arch devil.

Fabian: Yeah! Did you hear that? She already lives here!

Kalvaxus: Again if we [re con noise] it later. This fight seems mostly lost. Use reason!

Penelope: Now. It's time for you to go bye bye Fabian *starts casting another spell*

Fabian: (crit, mobile florish, plus 2nd level spell slot with Fandrangor) *throws up his sheet so it blocks her field of vision (like how people trick their pets) and then grabs her and tango swing dancing spins her off the ship as she yells and is destroyed as motes of silver light shoot out*

Dayne Blade

Burning ember flaming vains with a hellish gleam to his eyes

Doesn't know how long he's been there

How he was finished: Begged Gorgug to not "kill" him due to him being an Owlbear, but was ignored. He tried once more, saying "Dude dude dude we're both Owlbears!" but Gorgug simply answered "You're not an Owlbear anymore" before he chopped off Dayne head. Gorgug then pretended his head was a ball and that he was going for a pass.

Coach Daybreak

Burning ember flaming vains with a hellish gleam to his eyes, a whistle, a silvered halberd, and regenerating health

Aggressively targeted Tracker and Kristen (even as Gorgug literally stood over Kristen) and knocked Kristen out at one point

Yelled "No!" while flames shot out of his ears at the thought of ending toxic masculinity

Freaked out over Gorgug being an Owlbrear

Not a true devil, just a soul trapped in hell that was powerful enough in life to fight for the devils, punished to never understand why he was there (Brennan "He cannot find peace, but he can find you").

How he was finished: Daybreak shouted "I'm gonna kill you all. All of you deserve to be here, not me. I was a holy man! *points to Fig* YOU ARE A LITERAL ARCH DEVIL!" Fig answered "Yeah bitch it's fun!" before she used a 4th level psionic blast on him. He screamed as he was knocked off the ship and eviscerated by both Fig's psionic blast and the after effects of her booming blade* (Fig also steals his visage)

Scarecrow Men

The transfigured bodies of four former harvestmen who died

Burnt charred skin, flannel button up shirts, and heads of burlap sacks with scarcrow eyes, which were slightly aflame

How they were finished off: one was killed by Adaine's lightning bolt and the other three were gone in a flash of light by Kristen's destructive wave

***

Dis and Pok

Iron City of Dis

Choking smoke and freezing rain

Endless sprawling cast iron metropolis of dread, misery, and torture

Alarms (clacksaws I think Brennan said?) rang as the devils shouted "It's Seacaster!"

The city was lit up by Goldenrod (while the other ships in the armada caught up)

Building Holding Pok

At least one dark red and black stained glass window (which Riz crashed through). The room within was empty due to all the devils hearing the alarms and fleeing.

Dark hallway leading to a light coming out from under a closed doorway. A slightly ajar door was next to it and a possible third door with steal thrones was next to that. The slightly ajar door had a somewhat reflective marble wall (where a reflection of Pok could be seen from the hall) and a two way mirror that showed an interrogation room.

Pok

A goblin who was strapped to a chair and had a swolen eye. A pit fiend also splashed acid in his face

Was interrogated by a pit fiend flanked by two barbed devils

Kept a good poker face around the devils, at one point was snarling and growling as he had (what appeared to be) a goblinoid frenzy come over him

Was lacerated by barbed whips handled by the barbed devils until he collapsed, asking why he was there as he coughed up blood and appeared to go unconscious.

Shot both barbed devils in the head with his gun (which he picked off of Riz) as they were restraining Riz

Reached up and slapped his right ear to call for an extraction as a halo appeared behind his head. He reached out to grab Riz (Kid, I can't believe you made it here) before a beam of celestial light smashed through the ceiling. He confirmed that he was an undercover angel before raising his fist up in a superman pose as the beam made a loud sound and took the pair away.

***

Questions and Thoughts

How does Lorzug move, much less fight?

Fig shouldn't have told Vraz to eat her ass. She might have taken her up on it and tried to take a bite out of her ass. O_O

What IS a potentate?

How will Fig use her warlock abilities after being released? Was her insignia burning in her forehead how she's still able to do it?

Is Dayne's curse to never know how long he's been there?

How short is Adaine that our three Owlbears (all over 6 feet tall) didn't notice her when they went in for a three way chest bump?

Destructive Wave is the power of pissed off protective girlfriend energy.

When Kristen was knocked out, she was back in Silvar looking at a nice tree. Possible connection to the unknown goddess?

Adaine still has Johnny's warlock switchblade comb.

Will we get updated Pok art now?

Where is Riz now and how will he get back in time? Was this Kalina's plan all along (blow Pok's cover and delay the party longer to give them more of a lead)?

I am well aware that I spelled Alistair several different ways because I have no clue how to spell it and don't have it on my list of how I might spell it.

Please somebody teach Bill how to not suck at making bodies. I mean, I'm over here feeling sorry for those cinder zombies and between the crippling debt and unpaid internships, he could at LEAST give them working bodies with jaws and stuff.

Really paying attention made the 69 scene so much funnier and makes Ayda's confusion over it being a sex act so much more priceless. The couple was fully clothed, Kristen caressed Gorgug's leg while she was unconscious and being healed by Tracker, and (according to Brennan) Tracker just gave Kristen a sweet kiss. Part of me wonders if Tracker was messing with the group while Kristen came to thinking something dirty happened and just went with it, the other teens too inexperienced to know otherwise (save Ayda who must be so confused! XD).

The uselessness of Johnny Spells was one of my favorite parts of the stream.

Anybody else super happy Bill was so supportive of Fabian coming into his own, being supportive of his friends, and embracing dance?

Bill/Vraz. Nuff said.

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landofwordsandnonsense · 6 years ago

Text

And Love Said No

Fandom: Critical Role Rating: Teen and Up Category: Gen Characters: Caleb Widogast, Trent Ikithon, Nott the Brave, Fjord, Caduceus Clay, Beau, Jester Additional Tags: Team as Family, Fuck Trent Ikithon, Temporary Character Death, Canon Typical Violence, everyone loves Caleb and they’re going to make him realize it, this confrontation is inevitable and I have Strong Feelings on how I want it to go, Counterspell is sexy, playing fast and loose with D&D mechanics

Fanfic Masterpost

It couldn't have been avoided forever, even he had to admit that, and it was, perhaps, no more than he deserved. And he was stronger than he'd ever been.

He needed to be, because now he was alone and face to face with the worst person in the world.

In retrospect, they probably should have known better than to plan.

It had been meant to be a quick in-and-out smash and grab at an isolated Cerberus Assembly tower not far from the Xhorhassian border. Mostly for anything Beau could send back to the Cobalt Reserve plus enough of whatever else they could carry to disguise what they’d been after. They'd planned to get in, avoid as many people as they could and incapacitate any they couldn't, then get out before anyone could do anything about it. They were stronger now, but the idea of fighting an entire tower full of Cerberus researchers and warmages wasn't an appealing one.

But of course, their plans had a history of going... awry. Occasionally, something would go approximately the way they wanted it to, but usually, that was absolutely not the case.

This plan had been irrevocably fucked since its inception because they hadn't known who was in residence. Caleb wasn't sure if they would have aborted the plan entirely and stayed away if they'd known, or if they'd have gone in intending to murder everything between them and-

They'd gotten separated, splitting off to cover as much ground as they could as quickly as possible. Nott had been with him, naturally, but while she worked on a stubborn lock he'd felt a familiar thread of magic. He hadn't entirely meant to, but he'd followed it.

It couldn't have been avoided forever, even he had to admit that, and it was, perhaps, no more than he deserved. And he was stronger than he'd ever been.

He needed to be, because now he was alone and face to face with the worst person in the world.

He was trembling from a tangle of emotions too complicated to put a name to, but certainly fear and anger made up the larger portion of it. Caleb wanted to run, but it would have done him little good. So he held his ground, not trusting himself to speak, and glared across the chamber at Trent Ikithon.

"Bren, my boy," Ikithon said in that commanding voice that had once seemed so enticing, a beacon of truth and trust, that promised power if only he'd do as he was told without question. It made Caleb's skin crawl. "I'm so pleased to see you've returned to us, healthy and whole of mind again." He'd always been good at saying the right thing, but now Caleb could hear the poison under it, the deep, sardonic evil in every word.

"That is, that is not my name anymore," Caleb snarled. His hands were clenched tight in an unsuccessful attempt to minimize the shaking. "And I, I did not... I did not return to you." It was a statement he never could have imagined uttering, not to Trent Ikithon, and if he'd had time to think about it the words would have caught in his throat. But he'd spoken without thought, and now that he'd said it he wouldn't take it back. Even if having said that to the man who had once been the center of his universe made his heart try to beat out of his chest.

Ikithon's pleasant smile vanished. "You always were too stubborn for your own good. I see I shall have to re-educate you." His hands started moving in arcane gestures. "You belong to me, Bren. I made you. I own you."

Once, that had been true. There was no denying that Bren had belonged to Trent Ikithon, mind, body and soul. But- and Caleb hadn't realized it until just now- Bren was dead. Bren had been dead for a long time. "No," he said, surprising even himself as he held up his own hands and his Counterspell unravelled the enchantment the archmage was weaving. "My name. Is Caleb. Widogast." And Caleb belonged only to the Mighty Nein. His hand started to crackle and blacken, bursting into flames.

Ikithon sneered. "You wouldn't dare attack me. I, who taught you so much, who did my best to make a weak boy strong. I, who was like a father to you. Stop making a fool of yourself and cease this meaningless posturing this instant."

For a moment, Caleb thought he was right. Even now, even after everything, there was a part of him that doubted. A part of him that thought Trent had always been right and he was simply too weak to bear it. But the fire in his hand didn't go out, and he took a step forward. "No. You will, you will never, you will never use me again. Or anyone else."

And Trent Ikithon, the man who had haunted Caleb's waking nightmare for years, the person Caleb feared most in the world, took a step back. Caleb lifted his hand, and for a timeless moment, Caleb had the unthinkable privilege of seeing something in Ikithon's eyes he'd never thought to see.

Fear.

Then the moment shattered as the pain hit. It wasn't a spell, not really, at least, it was nothing that could be counterspelled. Caleb inhaled sharply, fighting the urge to double over in agony. A countermeasure, he realized dimly. Or a contingency. He'd been unaware of it until just now. But he'd been trained to fight through the pain, to ignore mere physical discomfort if it meant accomplishing his mission. He kept his hand up, despite the way he was shaking, and reached for the fire.

Another spasm wracked him and he couldn't help dropping to one knee. His breathing was harsh and he couldn't get enough air in, and the world kept swimming in and out of focus. But even now he wouldn't back down. He tried again. The third spasm was worse than ever, and he could taste blood bubbling up in his mouth.

"You stupid boy," Ikithon hissed. "What good is a weapon that can be turned against the man who made it?" He'd recovered his self-possession once it was clear that Caleb couldn't attack him. "Did you really think I'd ever give you the capability of harming me? All you are is a defective tool that needs must be destroyed. What a waste."

Caleb fell to his knees, oddly serene through the haze of pain. He was going to die here, but he had one comfort. He wasn't Trent's, and he never would be again. Here in this moment, he wanted nothing more than to kill Trent. He wanted it more than he'd ever wanted anything in his life, up to and including a way to turn back the time. The will was there, and the fire in his hand flared brighter as he tried one last time. He wanted to do it. He genuinely wanted to kill this man.

He just.

Couldn't.

Physically.

Do it.

He choked on blood and slumped over backwards. In the end, he thought muzzily, he was his own. He had no idea what was waiting for him in the Raven Queen’s realm, doubtless nothing pleasant. But he was his own, he didn’t belong to Trent Ikithon and he couldn’t take him back.

Then Nott’s voice shrieked “NO!” Two bolts flew out of the darkness and hit Ikithon in the torso, making him stagger back.

Before he could regain his balance, three streaks of light sizzled through the air over Caleb's head. Ikithon was able to bring up a shield that caught two of them, but the third went through and Caleb could hear the strangled curse as the old man spent a few precious moments patting the flames out of his ornate robes. Fjord strode past Caleb and halted two steps in front of him, glove still smoking.

Caleb was so startled by the half-orc's sudden appearance that he was slow in noticing he hadn't fallen against the stone tiles of the floor, but was propped up against someone's chest, with an arm around him. "I've got you, Mister Caleb," Caduceus rumbled, and there was a warm surge of magic that smelled like leaf mould and tea. His vision cleared a bit and it was easier to breathe, but there was no hope of him getting to his feet just yet. Behind him, he could hear movement, but there was too much Caduceus in the way to see.

"Fjord?" Beau's voice was rough and there was a restrained fury in it that Caleb was astonished by.

"I've got them," he said quietly, never taking his eyes off of Ikithon. "Fuck him up."

With no more warning than that, there was a blur of blue off to one side, followed almost immediately by a second, and the bright pink of Jester's floating lollipop. And maybe once he'd have tried to convince the rest of them to stay out of harm's way and let him deal with Ikithon. It was his problem, after all, and if it was a fight he couldn't win, well, he had it coming.

But he knew better now. Easier to convince the sun to rise in the west than to keep the Mighty Nein from protecting one of their own, and he was, for better or for worse, one of the Mighty Nein.

Everything became a little frenetic at that point, and Caleb could barely keep track of what was going on. Caduceus wouldn't let him up, worried that the wizard would aggravate the internal injuries he'd managed to give himself... and it wouldn't have made much difference anyway. Caleb couldn't attack Ikithon, that had been made abundantly clear... but he'd been watching Ikithon's hands, which started to twist together in arcane gestures as the girls bolted towards him. "Nein," Caleb whispered, and the Counterspell dissipated the magic before it had a chance to be anything. Beau and Jester were laying into the archmage, Beau's hands glowing with the Wildmother's light as he jerked out of the way just in time to narrowly avoid a shattered jaw. Periodically, crossbow bolts would rain down as well, but between Nott's natural stealthy nature and what was almost certainly the Traveller's blessing, even Caleb couldn't spot her.

They had, Caleb realized with dull wonder, managed to force Ikithon to go on the defensive. Between the unpredictable crossbow bolts, Beau's relentless attacks, and Jester's floating lollipop and the dull bong of Toll the Dead, he could barely get the time to cast. And when he did, Caleb was waiting.

His head was enough in the game that he recognized the somatic components of the spells as Ikithon started to cast.

Charm Person. "Nein..." Counterspell.

Sleep. "Nein." Counterspell.

Feeblemind. "Nein."

He didn't recognize that one, it was one he hadn't learned but it looked indescribably nasty. "NEIN."

Ikithon whirled, throwing up a Shield at the last moment to block a devastating blow from Jester's spiritual weapon. His urbane, controlled mask had fallen, and he was nearly unrecognizable with his face twisted in rage and fury. "You dare!" he screamed. "You who were born nothing and will die nothing! I made you, and you are mine to destroy!" He pulled his hand back, and flung a fistful of crackling death directly at Caleb.

Fjord had been keeping out of the fight, standing protectively in front of Caleb and Caduceus, but he moved then. He threw his arm out, and his shield glinted with an otherworldly light as it caught the spell and sent it careening away to impact harmlessly on the wall. Then he grabbed the spiral-carved seashell hanging innocently from a cord around his neck. "Stop," he said in a quiet, commanding tone that could not be argued with.

And Trent Ikithon's body locked up.

Jester darted forward with her hands filled with necrotic energy laced with green. She grabbed Ikithon and he bellowed in rage and pain. Then the Hold Person failed, and he jerked in her hands. Lightning crackled against her before Caleb could do anything about it. He made an incoherent sound of rage, and the only reason he didn't forget himself and try to set Ikithon alight then and there was Caduceus's gently restraining grip. By some miracle neither Jester nor Beau had taken a hit yet but that couldn't last and he knew that but like hell was Caleb going to let this monster ruin his family the way he ruined him...

"Just trust us, Mister Caleb," Caduceus said softly. "We've faced worse." Caleb made a breathless, hysterical noise at that. Hard to imagine anything worse-

There was a startled squeak as the lightning discharged, then Duplicity vanished with a soft pop.

If Beau had been furious before, she was enraged now, in a way that rivaled Yasha in the heat of battle. "Fuck you," she snarled. Of course, they all tended to get offended when anyone targeted Jester, so that wasn't surprising. What was surprising was what she said next. "You don't get to talk about my brother like that, you son of a fuck." Before he could sneer a response, her fist slammed into his spine hard enough he went down to one knee, and whatever spell he'd been trying to cast fizzled as his arms went limp.

"Do you- do you even know what you are protecting?" Ikithon snapped. "Do you know what he's done? Who he's ki-"

"Yeah. I do." Beau crossed her arms as two more crossbow bolts found their mark and Ikithon cried out. "I know exactly what you made him into and what you convinced him was the right thing to do about it. And it doesn't fucking matter."

"We've all done super shitty things," Jester said as she appeared out of the darkness. "And we've killed a lot of people. We love him and we don't care! You don't even care, you're just trying to make us hate him!" Green light flared in her hands and he fell to his other knee when it hit him and he screamed.

"You've lost," Beau said in a dangerously soft voice. "There's hell to pay and we've come to collect. We didn't know you'd be here today, but we were always going to come for your ass. And I really hope there's a special place in the Nine Hells all set up just for you."

The reality of the situation seemed to hit Ikithon all at once. He couldn't teleport away or even run; he'd used a lot of magic already and Caleb was waiting with at least three more Counterspells. He was barely alive at this stage, after the damage the girls had done. And it was plain to anyone with eyes or ears that they weren't going to let him walk away. For the first time, he was faced with his own mortality and realized that for all of his cunning and all of his planning, this ragtag bunch of barely functional assholes had beaten him. "There may be a place in the Nine Hells marked for me," he growled. "But I won't be going there alone." Then a Word rumbled through the air. It didn't matter that a crossbow bolt immediately sank into his eye or that Beau almost instantly snapped his neck, because the Word had already been spoken.

And Caleb choked before slumping lifelessly in Caduceus's arms.

----------------------------------------

Wind whipped around him, and nothing seemed to stabilize long enough for him to make out any details. Pink and blue and green flared, and he didn't know if he should be comforted or afraid. Then purple added to the mix and even though his surroundings were still a chaotic mess, the sound of the wind died away and gave him space to think.

'I like this person, right now, is a good person, a fine person.... That person is dead, and not- It's just a person who had this body. They abandoned it...'

A sensation he couldn't identify ghosted across his forehead. 'Time for that later.'

----------------------------------------

"-leb! Caleb!"

There was a small weight in his lap, and he blinked dazedly at the blurs of green and blue and pink that surrounded him before they resolved into the rest of the Nein clustered around him. He was still half in Caduceus's lap, with Jester kneeling on the other side and Fjord looking at him upside down from somewhere above his head. Nott was crouched on top of him, her claws caught in his coat and tears running down her face. Beau was a little distance away, taut as a wire and worrying at her thumbnail.

Caleb took a rattling breath and coughed. Then he shifted a little, and became aware of the dull shards of useless stone scattered across his chest and the floor around him. Nott's reaction was immediate. "Caleb!" She threw her arms around his neck and clung to him like she'd never let go again. It practically knocked what little air he had out of him, but that didn't stop him from slowly putting his own arms around her in a shaky hug.

Over her shoulder, Caduceus gave him a surprisingly relieved smile. "Welcome back, Mister Caleb."

Jester clutched at one of his hands tightly. Her eyes were red, and there were still tear tracks down her face. "Caleb! I'm so so sorry we didn't kill that dickhead sooner! We should have- we let him-"

He managed to squeeze her fingers slightly. "It is, it is all right, blueberry. I was..." He trailed off, then offered her a brittle half-smile. "I had long... come to terms with... the idea that... I would.... I would have to die... to... to be free of him."

Fjord's hand came down on his shoulder and squeezed comfortingly. "He can't hurt you again. We made sure of that. You or anyone else."

"...Ja. Ja. That is... that is gut. Th.... thank you..." He wouldn't ask. They'd done so much for him, more than he'd ever dreamed, it would be churlish to ask. He trusted them, after all, and if they said it was so, then-

Beau understood him better than most, though, and she saw something in his shadowed eyes that even Nott didn't. So after a few minutes, while everyone clung to him and reassured themselves he was alive, she stepped forward. "C'mere." She reached down to give him a hand up, gently shooing Nott off of him and taking his hand from Jester. They obligingly moved, and she hauled Caleb up like he weighed nothing at all. She pulled one arm around her neck and held onto it, and put her other arm around his waist. He probably could have kept his feet without the support, but for once in his life he wasn't going to protest the contact.

No one said anything as she kept hold of him, walking him over to the center of the room. Trent Ikithon's body was lying in an unceremonious, inert heap. It was impossible to tell what had killed him, the crossbow or Jester's magic, or the extremely comprehensive beating Beau had dished out. Maybe it didn't matter. But seeing it... that made it real. Caleb took a shuddering breath, then closed his eyes for a moment. "You okay, man?" Beau asked quietly.

"...No. But... but perhaps... I will be. In time. With... with help." He didn't look at her as he said it, but he didn't have to.

She squeezed the hand she'd pulled over her shoulder. "You've got it," she said. "We're here to catch you."

"I know." And funnily enough, he did. He was surprised to realize he actually believed her. "Beauregard?"

"Yeah?"

"...I would, I would be honored. To call you my sister."

Her dark skin flushed a little and she looked away. But he could tell she was pleased. "You ready to get out of here?"

Caleb looked down at his free hand for a moment. Beau didn't jump when the flames licked out of his palm to cover it, but she did raise an eyebrow. He stared at his hand for a heartbeat longer, then looked at the body on the floor. This time, there was no pain, nothing prevented him from casting Fire Bolt. And when the body burst into flames there was no reaction after all. Caleb sagged against Beau. A weight had lifted off of him, so heavy that its absence was a physical thing that left him disoriented. "It's over," he murmured. "It's finally over."

"Yeah. Come on, we stole a bunch of shit you should look at."

He gave her a breathless little laugh, and let her help him out of the room, with the others trailing behind. It was, he thought, a good way to start the rest of his life.

#fanfic #critical role #mighty nein #one shot

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darkelfshadow · 6 years ago

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Session Summary - 73

AKA “First Council Mission - Boareskyr”

Adventures in Taggeriell

Session 73 (Date: 15th November 2019)

Players Present:

- Rob (Known as “Varis”) Elf Male.

- Bob (Known as “Sir Krondor) Dwarf Male.

- Paul (Known as “Labarett”) Elf Male.

- Travis (Known as “Trenchant”) Human Male.

- Arthur (Known as “Gim”) Dwarf Male.

Absent Players

Nil

NPC

- (Known as “Naillae”) Elf Female. <Controlled by Travis>

Summary

- Starday, 6th Pharast in the year 815 (Second Era). Late Spring.

- The party begin this session, waking on the new day, having slept overnight in spacious rooms of the Royal Palace of Lord Nicosten in Crescent Moon. During a hearty breakfast, Archmage Tallous arrives and hands back the Black Dragon Mask to the party. He has placed a strong enchantment over the mask to disguise but this will require Labarett to perform a special Ritual at the dawn of everyday to continue this enchantment. Sir Krondor takes the burden and responsibility of carrying the Black Dragon Mask in his backpack.

- The party arrange to meet the War Duke Lady Laeral Silverhand at midday on one of the city’s docks where she will introduce them to Captain Lerustah “Half Face”, First Officer Bullus “Bull” and First Navigator Gailfia “Gail” of the ship Frostskimmr.

- During the morning the party spend some time selling and purchasing some magic items from the “Moonlight Craft” magic shop.

- As midday approaches the party make their way over to the specified dock. The are hundreds of docks within the internal protected bay of Crescent Moon. Many people, locals, sailors, and sea food merchants fill the open square set before this dock.

- It is a busy and noisy area. People move about carrying cargo, sellers are shouting out what goods they sell and even some children run around playing.

- A large ship, carrack class, can be seen moored at the dock. It’s sails are furled and numerous sailors in the distinct red clothing of the Crescent Moon Navy can be seen loading boxes and barrels onto the ship.

- The party see the War Duke ahead of them in the centre of the public square with two Crescent Moon soldiers escorting her. The party watch in horror, unable to intervene, as a nearby hooded figure leaps towards the War Duke and plunges a black dagger into her neck. The hooded robe blows away from the figure to reveal an Assassin of the Dragon Cult.

- The War Duke immediately becomes unconscious and her skin becomes grey from the deadly poison in her system.

- Now the scene erupts into chaos. Battle begins with the party racing forward to ward off the Assassin and save the War Duke, as more Cult forces appear from two large ware houses near the jetty. A Red Wizard of Thay appears, protected by three Dragoncult Officers, and he attempts to summon a teleport portal but Trenchant’s Counterspell stops the portal forming.

- Four Cult Fanatics also appear and begin casting ghostly Spiritual Weapons to attack the party whilst a group of Dragonwing Enforcers leap and fly towards the party and the ship.

- The battle is going back forth. Each time the party stabilise the wounds of the War Duke, the Assassin strikes her again. The crew of the Frostskimmr immediately launch a counter attack and begin fending off Dragonwing Enforcers. Soon, large heavy ballista bolts are flying from the Frostskimmr and are annihilating Cult forces.

- Gim fires a lucky shot with his Masterwork heavy crossbow and injures the Red Wizard of Thay and destroys the teleport crystal he was using to call forth the teleport portal. No more Cult forces will be arriving.

- Trenchant finally manages to fly away with the unconscious body of the War Duke, after she was stabilised and cured of her poison.

- Naillae is dropped to the ground, unconscious and bleeding to death.

- The Cult forces are desperate, knowing that they are not getting any more reinforcements, their plan being stopped by the destruction of the teleport crystal. Soon the Red Wizard is killed and so too one of the Dragoncult Officers.

- Gim has another lucky shot with his Masterwork heavy crossbow and destroys the crossbow of the Cult Assassin who was firing poisoned bolts at the party.

- When a large garrison of fully armoured and well trained Crescent Moon soldiers arrive, the remaining Cult forces surrender, all except for the Assassin who leaps and climbs up and over the buildings to disappear into the busy and crowded streets of the large city.

- Trenchant has flown the War Duke back to the Royal Palace where healers see to her needs. As she awakes she looks into the eyes of Trenchant, her saviour. She gives him her personal handkerchief, a sign of affection within the nobility.

- Soon the rest of the party return to the Palace and it is discovered that one of the War Dukes’ assistant had been a traitor and had informed the Cult of the midday meeting at the dock. The assistant is now missing, presumed long gone and returned to the hidden Cult forces that still dwell within the city. Luckily, this traitor knew nothing of the details of what occurred and what was discussed within the Council, nor had any knowledge of where the party was headed to next.

- The party arrange to sleep overnight and leave in the morning aboard the Frostskimmr. They spend an uneasy night in the Palace, suspicious of further Cult spies.

- Sunday, 7th Pharast in the year 815 (Second Era). Late Spring.

- The party arise and in the morning board the Frostskimmr. They set sail heading south and follow the coast. Over the next six days they get used to life on board the ship. The days pass with no incident, except each afternoon the same stillness, the sense of unease that the party felt previously when they first arrived in Crescent Moon, is felt for brief time again. The party surmise that someone is using the Drakhorn each day to summon Dragons. They look around at each other worried that perhaps they chose the wrong mission to start with.

- Now committed to this mission, they continue following the coast, until they arrive at the opening of a wide river on the coast. The low profile hull of Frostskimmr proceeds into the river, traveling inland for a few hours until it arrives at a smaller narrower section of the river that has a wooden bridge spanning it.

- “Half face” tells the party that this is as far as he can go and gives the directions to the party on how to proceed to Boareskyr. They follow a marked country road, going further into a mountain area. After half a day walking they finally arrive at Boareskyr Bridge.

- The large ancient stone bridge provides the only way inland across to the eastern lands of Taggriell. On this side of the bridge stands the settlement of Boareskyr. Little more than a collection of tents, wagons, and caravans providing food, fresh mounts, and other services to travellers and a home of lost souls and those wishing to avoid official attention.

- A lone stone tower, set higher up on the mountain, overlooking the bridge can be seen. The banner of Fanur and the Knights Of The Anvil can be seen on the tower.

- After Sir Krondor impresses some of the local scallywags when he throws one of them into a tent for lack of respect, they tell the party that if they are after information they should go to Bolo’s Tentside Inn. They head over to a colourful large pavilion near the centre of Boareskyr’s tent city.

- After entering the large pavilion they speak to the owner of the inn, a female Halfling called Bolo. She tells the party that she has seen someone matching the description of Varram The White. Apparently he was here six days ago with a group of a dozen other companions, including a large number of very large hooded figures. Bolo mentions that Varram killed one of the “Scaly ones” who had crept into town but the party can’t figure out exactly what she means by that.

- The party leave to head to the Anvil tower, except for Varis who stays and plays some gambling with some of the untrustworthy locals. He does so for a while but keeps losing each round as he realises that everyone at the table is cheating. As he finally leaves the game he learns about where the dead body of the “Scaly one” was dumped. Varis heads out and searches west of the settlement until he comes across a decomposing body of a humanoid. It has green scaly skin and long dark hair but the facial features are so decomposed that it is hard to identify what it is.

- Meanwhile, the rest of the party have gone to the Anvil tower where they discover that it is only manned by four Knights, and each of which is there because they have made some mistake or infraction and have to do a tour of duty in this remote tower as penance. They speak to the Knight on duty, Sir Dawn, who is slightly intoxicated and not seeming to take his duty on this tower very seriously.

- Sir Krondor gives him a dressing down and he agrees to watch out for the party for the next couple of weeks, as they travel to the east into the Serpent Hills to follow Varram, and to keep watch for their return.

- Eventually Varis returns to the party, telling them of the dead green body he found. Sir Dawn informs the party that the “Scaly one” is a Yuan-ti. Trenchant knows about these dangerous and evil beings. These humanoid snake creatures are highly intelligent, organised and skilled. They are a dangerous lot and look down upon all other races.

- The party get to sleep in the Anvil tower and plan to wake early to start heading into the east.

- Moonday, 8th Pharast in the year 815 (Second Era). Late Spring.

- The party awake early, still in darkness, with sunrise being a couple of hours away. Saying fair well to the Anvil Knights the party leave and head over the large stone bridge.

- Sir Krondor looks up into the night sky, and sees the small moon of Harell, nearly full. He touches the handle of his enchanted battleaxe Snaidh and smiles, thinking of the power it will wield in the coming night under the full moon of Harell.

XP Allocation

Group - Combined (This is equally divided by the number of players who were involved)

Quests (Only quests that are completed or rendered undoable, during this session, are shown here)

- “Save The Cheerleader. Save The World” Keep The War Duke Lady Laeral Silverhand alive = 2000 XP

- “Won’t Someone Think Of The Children!” Loss of Civilian Life (4) = -400 XP

- “No One Is Expendable” Loss of Crew (3) = -150 XP

- “I Want Them Alive - No Disintegrations!” Captured Cult Forces = 620 XP *

* Partial only rewarded as forces captured by the Crescent Moon Garrison

Creatures Overcome

- Dragon Officer = 1100 XP *

- Cult Fanatic = 450 XP *

- Red Wizard (Lower Rank) = 2300 XP *

- Dragonwing Enforcers = 1800 XP *

* XP from creatures overcome shared with Sailors and Soldiers

Individual (This is only given to that person and is not divided amongst all players)

Special Bonus (Outstanding Role Playing)

Nil

XP Levels and Player Allocations

Player : Start + Received = Total (Notes)

Rob : 84339 + 656 = 84995

Arthur : 65705 + 656 = 66361

Travis : 76160 + 656 = 76816

Paul : 65036 + 656 = 65692

Bob : 71464 + 656 = 72120

NPC (Naillae) : + (328) <Level up>

#D&D #DnD #5th #5e #ROT

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tipsycad147 · 6 years ago

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Psychic Curses and Spells that Work

Article about removing curses by Craig Hamilton-Parker.

Since earliest times, people have used ritual and magic to influence the world. The bison drawings from the prehistoric Altamira cave paintings in Spain, dating from 15,000 BC, may have been used in ritual magic to make sure a successful hunt. The principle is that similar things create similar effects–like produces like, or an effect resembles its cause. For example, in black magic, a human being could be cursed to death by spearing a skull with a metal point bearing the name of the intended victim.

This imitation of effects to influence events is called sympathetic magic. Magic also holds that things that have once been in contact with each other continue to act on each other at a distance after the physical contact has been severed. Many magic love spells, for example, require that the magician procure samples of the intended’s hair or fingernails to be used in the ritual or potion. The former principle is called the Law of Similarity, while the latter is the Law of Contagion or Contact.

Burning Effigies

I am writing this particular chapter on November 5, when we in the UK celebrate the ending of the first terrorist attack. Guy Fawkes was a co-conspirator in the “Gunpowder Plot” of 1605 in England. He and his cohorts decided to blow up the Houses of Parliament in London and succeeded in smuggling several barrels of gunpowder into the basement. The plot was thwarted and to this day we celebrate the occasion by setting off fireworks and burning effigies of Guy Fawkes.

This is, in fact, a form of sympathetic magic. Burning an effigy helps people to vent their hatred for their enemies in public, but the magician’s “law of similarity” also believes that burning the effigy will bring harm to the person whose image is being burnt. (A few years ago, my sister insisted that we burn an effigy of her ex-partner in place of the “Guy”)

The ritual of effigy-burning has been found in many ancient cultures including that of India, Babylon, Egypt, Greece, and Rome. The Ojibway of the American West would fashion little wooden images of an enemy and burn them while chanting magic spells. Called “the burning of the soul,” this ritual was believed to bring about the enemy’s death.

Then, of course, we have all heard of the voodoo doll, into which pins would be inserted to cause an enemy harm. Voodoo is still largely practised in Haiti; while in New Orleans, rooted in its large slave population mixed with Catholicism, you will find altars set up to protect against hoodoo magic (like voodoo a primarily healing-based practice based on sympathetic magic).

Sympathetic Magic

Sympathetic magic is still with us today in our superstitions and beliefs. How often do we see the American flag or effigies of Uncle Sam being burnt in protests? Burning an effigy is pure sympathetic magic: just as the image suffers, so does the man or nation.

“Holy Trinity, punish him who has done this evil and take him from us by thy great justice, that the sorcerer/sorceress may be anathema and we may be safe. Amen.” Popular Hoodoo Spell to remove a curse (To be spoken while throwing angelica in a southern direction)

Sympathetic magic is not necessarily evil in its intent. For example, voodoo (or more properly “Vodu”) is a religion that is characterised by ceremony, music, dance, and sacrifice, through which participants commune with their ancestors in trance and possession. It has a pantheon of spirits, called ‘Iwa’ that protect areas of life including love, family health, and wealth. Similarly, throughout Europe and America, there is a growing interest in the old religion of Paganism which is trying to cast off the negative witchcraft image given it by Christianity.

The truth is that many ancient magical beliefs may be used for good or ill. For example, returning to the effigy theme, puppet healing is the reverse of effigy burning. Instead of desiring to kill or injure the person whom the puppet represents, the practitioner wishes to help them. Healing given to the puppet is transmitted to the person represented.

Protective Spells

Protective healing spells are cast on the night of a full moon by voodoo sorcerers. In particular, they will make a Paket Kongo to summon the healing spirits. This is an onion-shaped, bright coloured, a cloth-bound package filled with herbs and the powdered flesh of a sacrificed rooster. It is tied around with string seven times and has large feathers sticking out of its top. Similarly, a Catholic may pray in Church with a rosary or a colour healer may “charge” water or a photograph with coloured light (Graphichromotherapy). Clearly, it is the intention of the practitioner that determines whether the results of magic are good or evil.

Voodoo and hoodoo have some interesting methods to protect the soul from harm. For example, if a person believes that they are under a psychic attack, there are a number of remedies that they can use to negate the harm. They may have a feeling that something “out there” is after them or that someone has bad intentions towards them. Similarly, they may feel that this energy has become an “entity” that is causing bad luck or illness. Wiccans generally believe that once you are aware of the curse or negative energy sent towards you, it no longer has power, where followers of voodoo and hoodoo believe that a curse, spell, or “crossing” can only be lifted using specific rituals and techniques.

The Psychology of Spell Casting

Naturally, psychology plays an important part in making a spell work. Just as we can talk ourselves into being ill, we can frighten ourselves into believing that bad luck and illness will befall us. If we believe we are unlucky, we may inevitably attract bad luck into our lives and curses may only succeed because the victim believes in their power.

Most people find out that they are jinxed through word of mouth or when a “friend” tells them that a spell has been put upon them. Let’s face it, people love to gossip and soon the belief in the jinx is reinforced by the community at large. Inevitably, as soon as something untoward happens to the victim, the jinx is to blame. They may lose their keys or a credit card and immediately they remember what the friend told them. And so the cycle of fear begins.

Worse still, a hideous token, gris-gris, amulet, or charm may be posted to them or hung on their door to warn them that magic has been cast. A hoodoo sorcerer may nail a gruesome chicken bone amulet on your front door and cover your steps in blood-red powder. In some countries, it is traditional to spit or blow powder in the victims face while speaking the words of the curse. This shock technique reinforces the power of the curse, taking the victim, as it does, off guard and naturally causes a severe upset.

Curses and a Jinx

REMOVING A CURSE | REMOVING A HEX |

“Protection comes to me this day . This crossed condition goes away. Returning negativity To the one who has crossed me.” –Hoodoo Candle Spell

There are as many ways to remove a curse or spell as there are ways to cast them, and these vary according to the cultural tradition. Remaining with the hoodoo theme, the belief is that curses should be “sent back” to the perpetrator. A popular way of doing this is to scatter Angelica in the direction of the curse, or to the South if the sorcerer is known. Similarly, Five Finger Grass (Cinquefoil) can be stuffed into a drained egg which is then sealed with wax. It is believed in New Orléans that a home with this magical egg in it will be free of jinx and curses.

Followers of hoodoo also like to take special herbal baths made with Dragon’s Blood, Five Finger Grass, Ginger, or Pine and Hyssop to protect them from sorcery. Herbs and special powders are also used by the secret “red sects” from Haiti to induce illness and fear in their victims. One pinch of these secret recipes is said to bring bad luck or illness. Similarly, this tradition holds that herbal baths may be used to combat an evil hex and also to bring luck in love and money.

Bath-time food offerings are made to the spirits of Ezili Freda (love) or Ibo Lele (money) and may include everything from popcorn to the blood of sacrificed animals. (I would try this technique myself, but am concerned that my wife would be a little alarmed to see chicken heads among the talc and soaps.)

REMOVING CURSES

Haitian voodoo has an armoury of amulets, totems, and tools to protect the soul. Malicious spirits are countered using an ason rattle made from a gourd and containing snake vertebrae. Music and dances are used to counterspells, and many of these ceremonies involve Catholic saints in the rituals. Most Haitian altars, in particular, include a mixture of both voodoo and Catholic imagery, with icons of saints placed next to tribal gods. Altars also include magical drawings of “verve” designs, which are made during ceremonies as an aid to draw the protective spirits from their divine homeland to the mortal world.

They look very similar to western protective talismans. But perhaps some of the odd tools of voodoo priests are dolls heads that they squash into bottles to ward off evil spirits and sequined bottles decorated with a skull motif of the Gede spirits (the guardians of the dead and masters of the libido). One strange protective totem, created by Franz Barra, featured a Barbie doll squeezed into a miniature, red-sequined coffin.

The Evil Eye

Voodoo and hoodoo are, of course, not alone in giving strange surreal remedies to protect the soul from curses and spells. Many believe that the soul can be harmed by a jealous stare or envious glance. The eyes are considered “the gateway to the soul” and, in many cultures, the “evil eye” is believed to harm the soul. It is one of the oldest and most culturally prevalent magical beliefs in the world.

The evil eye is believed to cause miscarriage, illness, business failure, marriage breakdown, bad luck, and a great many misfortunes. In addition, anyone, including those who have no special powers, can give the evil eye. Since it happens involuntarily, no one can be certain who or where the evil came from, making this one of the most feared of all magical powers.

People with different colored eyes or eyes set close together or deep in their head were often suspected of having the Evil Eye and were often persecuted as witches from the sixteenth to eighteenth century. In the 1930s, a man from New York earned his living by renting his evil eye to prize-fight managers. He would sit ringside and stare at opposing fighter.

Averting the Evil Eye

There are hundreds of ways to avert the Evil Eye. One of the most immediate techniques, and not recommended for dinner parties, is to spit three times in the eye of the onlooker. Another is to step aside, if someone is staring at you, so letting the negativity pass you by. The Italians wear special amulets of hands making sexually symbolic gestures for protection from the evil eye: called the mano fico (‘fig hand) or the mano corunto (horned hand).

In most cultures, the cure involves a complex series of rituals, which vary around the world. Water, oil, and melted wax often play a part, or the ritual may center on an eye-shaped and liquid-filled natural object such as an egg. Animals that were supposedly affected by the Evil Eye were burned, whereupon the person who had made the curse would suffer the same agony. Similarly, a clay manikin, or witch puppet, made in the likeness of the suspect person with the Evil Eye would be stuck with pins to lift the spell.

Naturally, I have always believed these things to be hocus-pocus; that is, until my Israeli friend brought us a present from his homeland. He knew we had had trouble with a neighbor so gave us an ornate hand in the “stop” gesture with an eye in the palm. “This will avert the evil eye of the bad woman,” he said. “It’s good. Hang it up in the front of your house and you will have no more trouble.” Within three months, the bad neighbor had moved.

Profits of the Prophets

“Praying is like a rocking chair–it’ll give you something to do, but it won’t get you anywhere.” — GYPSY ROSE LEE (Rose Louise Hovick, American stripper)

Many claim that sympathetic magic is “mumbo jumbo,” that results can be explained away. This is no doubt true in some instances, but there are also times when such magic appears to have worked. Yes, belief alone may be enough to cure some people or fulfill a spell’s curse. But there are cases on record that contradict that scenario–where people appear to falter even though they are unaware a curse has been placed on them. Nonetheless, common sense is the primary ingredient in spiritual ventures, particularly in relation to magic and the healing arts.

Magic Snake Stone

Some people believe that snake bite calls for treatment by “magic snake stone,” which is, in reality, no more than benzine or a gallstone, having no effect on the venomous bite. Clearly, if a snake-bitten person were to rely on such magic in this instance, consequences could be fatal.

Sadly, charlatans still exist today to take advantage of those who are gullible and superstitious. Often this is the case with those who are upset about the break-up of a relationship: they will do, or pay, anything to get their partner back! A common scam is promising to change your luck by lifting a curse or a jinx or removing “negativity from your aura.”

Through my columns and website, I have received many letters from people frightened by threats of a curse that they are told can only be removed if they pay money. These “psychics” often target people who are already fearful, having met “bad luck” in their lives. The fraud psychic have good observational skills and is able to give the sitter with enough apparent information to convince them that what they say is true. They are alert to facial reactions and bodily gestures, and incorporate feedback information likely mentioned earlier in the sitting or consultation or hinted at in a response.

Once the sitter is hooked with this “cold reading,” the charlatan may offer to change the person’s luck for a price. I know of someone who was quoted $3,000 to have bad luck lifted from their lives. For this fee, the “psychic” would burn a magic candle to clear the misfortune. However, she warned that, as the case was particularly bad, it might be necessary to burn more candles. Of course, this would cause added costs, for the magic candles and her services.

Negative Energy Curses

A real curse is a set of words or a ritual that has been imbued with the negative energy of a thought-form. A curse cannot harm us unless we allow it to, by giving the negative energy an entry point. Certainly, paying money to someone else will not remove negative energy, nor will having rituals performed on your behalf. The key to protection from real curses come from your own refusal to give in to superstition and unfounded fear. Just as money can’t buy you, love, giving money to such people cannot change your luck or make you well again. People often incur such problems when they do not generally take personal responsibility for their lives.

They tend to go to a fortune-teller because they want someone else to make the hard choices for them. It is much easier to blame things outside of ourselves for our troubles. We accuse others, instead of owning up to our own faults. We blame circumstances and people for troubles that are of our own making. And, of course, many of us blame our bad luck on fate. How much better it is to take charge of our own lives! Personal responsibility gives a person self-confidence and a realistic view of circumstances.

The role of the true psychic is to give insight and inspire, not to make decisions for you. A psychic can encourage you, and even empower you to take charge of your destiny. To do something about it! So, take my advice: If you are ever asked for money to remove a curse or a spell, to regain health, to bring back a lover, or to change your luck, leave immediately and don’t look back!

psychics.co.uk/blog/curses-and-spells-that-work/

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suddencosmology · 2 years ago

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Antimagic for the Soul: a brief exploration of bullying casters in Dungeons and Dragons 3.5 edition.

Magic is scary. There are plenty of ways to protect your squishy or poor-save allies from getting ratioed by the local evil wizard, but just like reproduction, prevention is the best defense. A proactive stance vs magic not only reduces the stress of preparing your spells for the day, but reduces the need to fill your head with staple spells like Protection From Energy.

So how does one prevent spellcasting? With Counterspell! Problem is, Counterspell in it default state is a reactionary ability. Not only do you need know what spell is coming at you, have that spell prepared yourself, and you need to ready your action to Counterspell it. That just won't do.

First we look at the feat Improved Counterspell. This alters the requirement of readied spell to be any spell of the same school, provided it can match or beat the spell level. Good, but not perfect. You still need to know the spell is coming.

For Sorcerers, Wizards, Clerics, and classes that use those spell lists, there is the spell Battlemagic Perception. A 3rd level spell, this baby gives you a boost to Spellcraft to identify the spell coming at you, and with 5 ranks in Spellcraft, you instantly sense all spells happening within line of sight/100 feet of you. Also, it gives Counterspell as a free action. Doing so ends the spell which is a bummer, but sometimes one 'lolnope' is enough. Until you're high enough level to be dealing with Quickened Spells, you've effectively stolen the caster's turn.

But it can go further. The feat Divine Defiance allows you to spend one use of Turn Undead or similar ability to immediate action Counterspell. Given the situational value of Turning, a Cleric probably has two to six more Turn attempts than they need in a day.

A character with all of these can fire off two Counterspells in the same round if need be. Very sexy.

But there are more fish in the sea, and lots of them like hitting people with sharp/blunt objects. The inherent martial solution to casters is hitting them, and the threat of hitting them. A caster within a threatened space must make a Concentration check (DC 15+(2xSpell level)) to cast their spells without provoking attacks of opportunity. At low levels this is a gamble, but at higher levels, with higher bonuses, this is an easy check.

The Disruptive feat increases the DC to cast defensively by 4. Improves the odds of failure... but what if you could guarantee failure?

Look no further than Mage Slayer. This feat makes defensive casting impossible.

The feat Supernatural Instinct covers a different, but important base. It causes any supernatural ability (such as spell-like abilities and breath weapons) used by a threatened foe to provoke an attack of opportunity.

Now, a caster can always Tumble (DC 15 to move safely) away or take a five foot step to get out of melee range. The solution here is twofold: either increase your reach, or make moving not an option.

Tactical use of the environment can force this caster up against a wall, a cliff, or just in the reach of another character.

Creating or emulating Difficult Terrain (halves move speed, cannot five foot step) has a myriad of options. There are spells galore, either produced by a friend, a magic item, or yourself if you multiclass.

For feats, Difficult Swings creates Difficult Terrain in your threatened space when you unleash a full attack. Scorpion Style cuts an enemy's speed down to 5 feet (Fort save negates), and Footslasher halves their speed on a successful attack.

Reach is often increased by being bigger (either magic or playing a Large character), but there are also reach weapons and the Extending weapon property to get an extra 5 feet between you and your enemy.

So these are all well and good, but what if you just really hate magic? What if other people casting spells at you is just the worst? Try Antimagic Field. A ten-foot radius bubble of Fuck You, available as a sixth level spell. No spells, no supernatural anything, and no magic items. Nothing works.

Oh yeah, you're a player character. You probably have and like your magic items. Recalculating bonuses is annoying, even with an app or digital sheet. Also, Antimagic Field means you, the caster, can't cast. Sadge.

But what if... haha, just kidding.

Unless? Selective Spell. A metamagic feat. +1 to the spell level, and one designated creature within a spell's area is unaffected by the spell. Select yourself, and enjoy all benefits of antimagic with no downsides.

Thank you for reading and remember: every caster is beyond salvation except the ones on your side.

#dnd #pathfinder #dnd 3.5e #character building #antimagic #all my homies hate magic #except my magic homies #solutions to problems the DM doesn't want you to solve

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radramblog · 4 years ago

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A recap of a D&D One-shot: The B-Team

This is a little bit late, frankly, since the one-shot in question took place quite some time ago. But it’s pseudo-sequel is upcoming, and I’ve been building a character for that, so.

The B-Team was a very cool and good one-shot that turned into a two-shot because things kinda just kept going on for a bit, and that’s okay because we were having fun. It was the first D&D (or tabletop in general, excluding TCGs) I’d played in quite a while, since nobody’s campaigns had spare space and it’s not like I feel experienced enough to DM my own one.

It was also heavily inspired (I believe) by a movie I haven’t seen, so until it was literally spelled out for me I had no idea about that. Oops. Anyway.

I’m not sure this is going to be the most interesting content, but this is also going to nudge my memory about the setting and such, which is relevant for one shot two, so. At the very least, my mates who read this and weren’t there can get a rundown, even if it’s a little late.

We did so much crime.

The B-Team opens with our titular party returning to Huckston (a city I had assumed was spelled differently) from a job for local mob boss Seamus Greenleaf, a halfling sorcerer whose accent was as silly as his name implied. Dude was basically an extremely dangerous leprechaun. Said job involved the retrieval of a ring whose name I forgot but basically just gives regenerative immortality.

Our party was comprised of 4 members, each with a very particular set of skills that probably would have worked a little better if we’d communicated better beforehand. We had Prissy, a Half-Elf Courtesan and Wizard who was theoretically the party face but more importantly a nigh-untouchable Bladesinger, Vael, a Human Circle of the Shepherd druid who is likely single-handedly responsible for getting that subclass softbanned from our tables for just spamming rats and bears everywhere and making keeping track of things a pain, and Stitches, a Half-Orc Rogue who had to take up the tank/melee role even though their class was not suited to it, because the rest of the party was casters.

And then there was my character, Parri. A Kobold Artificer/Alchemist, who I’d essentially flavoured as someone who digs through dumpsters to find usable components to do the grossest possible magi/science possible. I’d deliberately taken spells that were less useful than they were flavourful- this snappy mans is very likely to have Grease handy since he’s probably rooted around in a nasty restaurant bin, he’ll have Heat Metal (a spell I didn’t realise was as good as it is) since that would be a useful tool for making things to hold dangerous ingredients, and y’all know he’s taking Acid Arrow. Actually, you get that one for free as an Alchemist anyway, so.

Parri was…interesting to play, to say the least. I’m sure people complain a lot about this sort of thing, but his accuracy with spells was frustrating at best. Alchemical Savant, on the other hand, was an excellent little boon that made sure said spells were dealing some sexy damage. I probably goofed up when I took Cantrips- Poison Spray was solid enough, but Mending was something I’m pretty sure I never used- while it makes sense for someone going through garbage to want to fix up the things they find, we did a lot more breaking than we did fixing. Parri was also a major Critical magnet, including on the opening turn of the final battle, so he spent a lot of time healing himself with various abilities.

Artificer is also a class I will probably wait a while before going back to, because it has a lot of little tinkering going on, appropriately enough. By level 9, where we ended the campaign, he had a sizable pile of spells with 3 levels, the Magical Tinkering ability to basically have a bunch of little things that do semi-useful stuff, 6 infusions- basically self-made magic items, with a huge list to pick from and 3 active at a time, the ability to make tools at will, two randomised Experimental Elixirs every long rest, that also give temporary HP, the ability to cure statuses and diseases pretty much at will, and the extremely useful Flash of Genius feature for yourself and allies. Added onto the Kobold stuff of Grovel, Cower and Beg (an ability that, despite being nutso bonkers, I literally Never Used), there was a lot to keep track of, and I’m much more keen to go back to something a little simpler.

These 4…adventurers? Would show up to Greenleaf and hand over the ring, only to discover that it was not the ring they had assumed it was, or at least, it didn’t seem to work. Assuming we, his loyal hench-group, were trying to screw him, he sicced his boys on us, forcing us to flee to safe haven, and attempt to make a next move.

Each of our characters had a person or group we knew in the city who could help (I deadass don’t remember Vael’s one, though), and as a team now being hunted by the largest gang around, we were hunting for options. Stitches had family working in the docks, who fortunately knew a guy who could promise us safe passage the hell out of dodge- and considering the circumstances, that seemed like the best idea if we wanted to keep our lives. His fee, however, was well beyond our price point, so our goal was, in fact, to get rich quick. For our lives.

And that’s just what we did, using the only thing we knew best: Crimes. Using Prissy’s contact- a hole-in-the-wall bar she used to work at (or at least, she knows the owner), we had ourselves a relatively safe base to work from for a few days, from which we could sneak off to the city’s underbelly- literal in this case, since it was in the sewerage- and find jobs of Questionable Repute to do. Lucrative, but dangerous. We took a couple contracts, bought some shit from Parri’s contact (Black Market Magic Items!), and got to work.

It is worth noting that, of course, our travel was not particularly free, as the price Greenleaf put on our heads was astronomical. So just about everywhere we went, we were met with someone or another trying to kill us for a reward. This was a great excuse to have Lots of Fights, but it meant that our resources were somewhat limited. Everything from goblins to fully trained Dragonborn warriors and tamed Drakes was on our ass, and fortunately, we survived each encounter.

The first job we took was pretty much the reason the game was extended to a second session- the assassination of a major noble pretty much turned into a murderous heist movie scene. With the noble in question being a sleazeball, it’s not like we really minded (Parri was evil-aligned anyway). It ended up a surprisingly involved plan, with Vael shapeshifting into a rat and Stitches doing Rogue Shit in the background to keep things moving, Prissy doing what courtesans do best and stab people to death in bed, and Parri disguising as a waiter, doing not a great job of it, but eventually enabling the escape by causing a distraction in the form of setting loose the noble’s pet Lion (via melting the chains, because subtlety is dead) and fleeing in the ensuing chaos. It was kind of a blast to put together, though particularly nerve-wracking- especially because if anything went wrong, or the set-lion-loose plan failed, Parri was in the middle of a room with many, many guards.

But it did go right, and the Lion even got to survive, after shrugging off a spell or two from the wizards guarding the place, so we got paid, called it a night, and called it a day in game because it was like 6 or something at this point I think.

After a week (or two?), we reconvened for the second part of what was now the B-Team two-shot. Our objective of Get Gold was not fully completed, but we’d gotten the majority of our funding sorted, so our next job would be something a bit easier and safer. As it turns out, that job would be Bullying Shopkeepers for Protection Money, something that made me vaguely uncomfortable IRL but hey, it’s only game.

Over the course of this job, we threatened a local blacksmith, a potion-seller (Parri made off with a brew or two), and a small local Goblin gang named the Green Mongrels. While this particular altercation turned violent, Prissy had just picked up Fireball, so you can guess how that one went. Two of the gang’s three leaders ended up so much dust on the ground, let alone the grunts, and the final one surrendered, which was appreciated. Especially since it meant we had a couple extra spell slots for the fight on the way back, being the one with the aforementioned tamed drakes.

Cash in hand, it was now time to get ourselves smuggled out of dodge, levelling up in the process. We actually levelled a few times over the course of the campaign, an accelerated pace mostly because it’s a short thing so it doesn’t really matter, and because levelling is both fun and lets the GM throw harder things at us.

Our attempt at escape was somewhat thwarted, as upon reaching the shore and farewelling our now quite rich trafficker, we were ambushed by our final foes. Because of course, if there was a B-Team, there would of course be an A-Team. This was a pretty interesting idea for a fight, a squad of four deliberately mirroring our own- A Goblin Artificer on the Artillerist stream, a Rogue preferring bows to swords and spending most of their time peppering us with arrows while stuck to the side of a cliff, a Druid that turned themselves into a monster rather than summoning like ours did, and a Wizard who’s class I don’t really know but boy did he like Counterspells.

This was a long, and protracted, and kind of brutal fight that took a lot out of the group, and I’m pretty sure more than one person (and by that I mean more than Parri, because he got shot right in the face for a crit immediately) was downed over the course of it. But eventually, the Rogue was knocked off the cliff enough times, the Wizard was downed and drowned, the Druid ran out of things to transform into, and the Artificer got taken apart with extreme prejudice.

But it didn’t seem to be over. As we were scrounging the bodies, someone attacked Stitches, and it was unclear whom or from where. We assumed it was the Wizard having somehow survived, as he’d been walking on water and thus his body ended up in the depths- couldn’t find it. Parri casts detect magic, and one very dead Wizard was found.

And a very suspicious Necromantic signature coming from Vael.

Turns out he’d had the reviving ring the whole time, and it was driving him completely mad. A final fight ensued, arguably our biggest damage dealer, currently unable to die, against the remainder of the party. And it was similarly brutal.

The tech ended up being for our not particularly strong characters to have to get close enough to pry the ring off his fingers so that they could actually become cold and dead. This was somewhat complicated by Parri getting very quickly downed by bats and bears, and Stitches being actually killed by such. After some healing and teleportation thanks to Prissy, however, we were just able to not only get the ring and finally put Vael down, but Parri, having recently learned Revifify and acquiring a jewel to burn on it, managed to un-kill Stitches.

Betrayal is a great way to make the closing moments of an adventure particularly memorable, I think.

Put mostly together, the ring and bodies disposed of (no-one holding on to this fucker anymore, ideally), 3/4ths of the B-Team wandered off into the sunrise, to restart their lives anew somewhere else. I like to imagine Parri opened a potion shop somewhere, but who knows if any town would actually suffer a Kobold long enough for him to do so.

And that was the campaign. It was a lot of fun, though it had been so long since a previous tabletop adventure that I don’t really have a lot to compare it to. The table seemed to get along well enough (I mean we were all friends beforehand, so der), aside from some somewhat awkward pauses.

And considering the sequel to this campaign is coming, with different characters and the same people (now significantly less stressed out since the Uni break is here), I’m extremely excited to get back into it. I have a new extremely small man to play as, and I couldn’t be happier to bring him to the table. Just…not as many nonsense abilities this time.

#ramble #tabletop #dungeons and dragons #very long! oops

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