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#and the semester is ABOUT TO END and he goes and gives me a 50/60 which tanks my 103% (love extra credit) to a 91%

kinetic-elaboration · 3 years

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100 Days of Writing: Day Sixty-Three

I decided to catch up on The 100 Days of Writing and then I... accidentally wrote a large number of words. In my defense, this is like 2 weeks’ worth of questions. Also I skipped the ones I didn’t have anything to say about so actually this could be worse.

(I’m not even kidding, this is really long. I talk about writing rituals, tools for plotting, my thoughts on opening with dialogue and why I don’t like it, my favorite topics, the weather, and what length of fic I like to write.)

I’m tagging, and apologizing to, @the-wip-project and fellow participants @she-who-the-river-could-not-hold, @thelittlefanpire, @hopskipaway, @easilydistractedbyfanfic, @dylanobrienisbatman, and @fontainebleau22.

Day 49: How do you get yourself in the mood to write? Do you have a ritual?

Every time I tell myself I’m going to get back into doing these questions, I see this one in my bookmarks and go nope! and turn around. It’s not a hard question; I’ve just been having trouble consistently getting into the mood to write, so I feel like any answer I try to give to it will be, in some sense, a lie. Like do I ever get “in the mood” to write? Really?? Also, I feel like I’m relying too much on ‘ritual,’ building up ‘the perfect writing situation’ in my head, which at the end of the day is less important than just saying ‘I’m going to do this now’ and then doing it.

I do have some things I always do when I sit down to a writing session. I write on my couch. Almost always (unless I’m on an event deadline where I just have to write in bits and pieces whenever possible), I write in sprints—I use write or die to keep me actually typing and not staring into space. I write in order, and I often write a whole scene at a time. So before I start I need to have at least a couple solid opening sentences in mind, plus some kind of idea about what happens/needs to happen in the scene. In order to get in the right headspace, I usually spend some time just thinking before I actually get to writing. I reread my outline or notes, and skim whatever I might have already written on the project. Sometimes I look at images that help me get in the right mood. Sometimes I just imagine or daydream for a bit. The difficulty, especially recently, is in making sure I do this just enough and not too much, because then I get too caught up in my head and I can no longer translate what I’m seeing into words.

In a broader sense, I also have a building up to writing ritual—again, I think this is part of my problem, that I don’t know how to balance this build up with actual writing. In the hours/days before writing something, I turn it over in my head a lot. I practice different versions of those critical opening sentences. I play it out like a fantasy just to see if there’s a possible flow, even if the final version is different. Basically, I try to turn it into something that just needs to be written, that just needs to get out. But again—this can lead to overthinking and frustration.

The best way I can describe writing for me is that, when it goes well, I find a rhythm, or enter into a zone, where I can describe the images in my head in a way that’s both accurate and pleasant to read. But entering that zone or finding that rhythm is like jumping into a game of jump rope. If you don’t do it right, you’re just going to trip over your feet and get tangled in the rope. But if you do it correctly, it’s fun and exhilarating and you can keep jumping for a long time. Sometimes it takes me some false starts to jump in. And recently I’ve been having days where I just can’t at all, where I tangle the rope up so much I can’t unknot it. Those are the days I just have the same sentences repeating over and over in my head, sounding wrong, and I can’t do anything about it. On the other hand, I write in much longer sprints than I did a couple years ago. I used to only write partial scenes, maybe a few hundred words. Now I can write whole scenes without stopping, and on a few occasions, I’ve written multiple scenes or even whole stories without stopping. So in other words, when it works, it really works. But it doesn’t always, and there’s not a lot of in between.

Day 50 What fic/story made you?

Um… honestly I’ve been writing, in general and fic specifically, for such a long time that I didn’t have a ‘maybe I can do this’ moment. I mean one problem I’ve never had is thinking I can’t do this. I had positive reinforcement for my school and academic writing, and for a long time my fictional stories were just for me, and I knew what I liked. Even just thinking about my fic writing… I’ve been posting fic online since 2006, and I’ve been in multiple fandoms. I don’t really have much connection to a lot of those early stories anymore. They feel like they were written by someone else, a little. I’ve also moved on from most of the fandoms I wrote for in my early fic days so I don’t feel like I can really judge them anymore.

That said… there is kinda an obvious answer for my Star Trek fic lol. I also have favorite stories, and stories that stick out even years after I wrote them, in all (or at least most) of the fandoms I’ve been in. But I’m not sure if that’s the same.

Also, I had two teachers who were really encouraging of me and who I still think about often. One was my seventh grade English teacher, who had us do a lot of writing exercises of various types, both large and small, including keeping writing journals we wrote in every day at the start of class. He once told my mom that I wrote well, not for a seventh grader, but in general, and to be honest I still think of that with some regularity and take a lot of pride and comfort in it. The other was my creative writing professor in college. I don’t think I did my best work for that class, but she was very encouraging and seemed to like what I did. At the end of the semester, as I was preparing my portfolio, she told me that if I didn’t want to do much editing, I didn’t have to, because my unedited work would stand on its own. Again, especially considering all the problems that I saw with my writing for that class even then, I really took that comment to heart. When I’m feeling very self-critical, I remind myself that even my raw scribblings have, perhaps, something to them, and it helps ease the excessive and unwarranted pressure I put on myself. These aren’t really stories about specific writing pieces that ‘made’ me but I do think they speak to that ‘maybe I can do this’ feeling.

Day 51: Do you use tools for plotting and what are they?

So, generally, no. Sometimes I’ll look at various writing/plotting/organizational tools as a method of distraction, but my actual process is very simple. I use plain old notebooks and pens, and word documents on my computer, to plan all my fics, from the one-shots to the multi-chapters. I start by writing down general thoughts and brainstorming, then I build a scene list and/or outline, and then, if necessary, I separate the scenes lists into chapters. Sometimes I break down the scenes even more, if I have additional ideas I don’t wan to forget or if I know I need to hit certain points in a specific scene. The process varies a little bit from project to project, but that’s basically all I do.

I did use Evernote to plan the (still unwritten….) Ark AU. I don’t know if that was the best program choice or if something else exists that would have more precisely met my needs. But that’s what I used and that’s how it is. It’s a little annoying that every time I open it, it’s been updated, and the interface looks totally different and I have to relearn where everything is. But the tagging system has worked decently to allow me to see the big picture of this complex, multi-strand, multi-character, multi-ship disaster epic of a story. I struggled to plot it for a long time because I didn’t know how to balance all of the different parts. In Evernote, I made one ‘note’ for each character, and one for each scene (in addition to miscellaneous notes about sub plots, relationships, questions, etc.). Then I tagged each of them, including tagging the scenes by chapter. So now I can look at a list of all the characters, or all the scenes, or all of the scenes in chapter 8, or whatever, but I can also look at just one particular note at a time, and not be distracted by anything else. That said, I do also have one note that is just a total scene list for the whole fic, which is pretty reminiscent of my usual outlining process.

So… somehow this helped me plot (tentatively) the whole thing, but as I’ve written almost none of it—I finished outlining this in February 2020 so in my defense… I think you can see why it stalled—I’m not yet sure if it was a successful experiment in a ‘plotting tool.’

Day 60: How do you start your chapters? Do you start with dialogue? Why or why not?

While I am definitely against prescriptive “writing rues” generally, as my own personal rule, I try not to start with dialogue unless I have a very good reason.

To be quite honest, I think it’s lazy. I do think that dialogue openings can be used well, if the writer acknowledges that they are intensely stylistic and, from a reader’s perspective, quite difficult. Even within fanfiction, where a line of dialogue (especially if accompanied by a dialogue tag or swiftly followed by a reference to the speaker) gives a lot more information to the reader than in original fiction, opening with dialogue still shoves the reader directly into the deep end of the scene, with very little to orient her. WHERE is the speaker? WHO is being addressed in the dialogue? WHAT is the context of the conversation? Who ELSE might be present in the scene?

There are reasons you might want to throw the reader in the aforementioned deep-end. Maybe it’s an in media res situation and you want to emphasize the overwhelming nature of the action—starting a scene with “Get down!” for example. Or maybe the overall mood is one of disorientation or floating or uncertainty, and you want to create the same effect in the reader.

But I think if you’re starting a scene with dialogue because that’s the first thing that comes to mind for you��the person who conveniently already has the setting, character list, and even future plot already in mind—and it’s just simplest and easiest to start that way, you’re doing a disservice to the reader.

For example, I actually am planning to start the next chapter of the Sleeping Beauty AU with dialogue. My POV character is in a room with multiple other characters, and she’s examining something meaningful to her and not fully listening to the conversation around her. So I want the dialogue to float around in the background, to feel unmoored, and to stand in contrast to the very precise, detailed thoughts and memories that she’s experiencing, which are grounded in physical sensations like touch.

I haven’t quite gotten it to work yet, though, in part because opening with dialogue and doing it well is, in my opinion, quite hard. The difficulty lies in alleviating the challenges the reader is experiencing and making the text fluid and easy to picture. You need to get all of that scene-setting information—the who, what, when, where, and why—in very quickly, but without being jarring. In this scene in particular, I have multiple characters, all in a comparatively unusual location, and I need to establish where they are, who exactly is there, how they’ve come to meet my POV character (which happens ‘off screen’ between the end of Ch5 and the beginning of Ch6), all on top of the character’s thoughts and feelings.

I know all of this very well. To picture the scene in my own head takes only a moment. I just think about it and I see all seven of the characters, where they’re sitting, how they’re positioned, what their facial expressions are, and I also know roughly what each of them is thinking and feeling. To describe all of this in words would take several sentences. Do I put all those sentences on the front end? Do I weave them in among other description and dialogue? Is all of it even necessary—maybe we don’t need to know who’s sitting in what order on the couch, for example.

I’ve gone over a couple of different ways to do this in my head, and I’m sure it is possible, but I’m struggling to get it all down in a coherent way. (Admittedly, I’ve only made one solid attempt. As I was describing above, I’m probably going to jump in with several false starts, and then it will suddenly click.)

My initial attempt to set up the scene relied heavily on dialogue, but when I read it over, what sounded snappy and interesting in my head just fell completely flat—because it lacked context and thus, any meaning. I think the gulf between how dialogue openings feel to the writer and how they feel to the reader is large. To the writer, they feel easy and natural. To the reader, they can feel forced and, contrary to the writer’s intention, serve as an additional reminder that this is a constructed narrative rather than an immersive experience—the opposite of natural. In other words, as I said, they’re a highly stylized form of writing.

To illustrate, this was my first try at the Chapter 6 intro:

"I still can't believe it," a lightly awed voice says from somewhere behind Clarke. "The Princess of Alpha Station really used to live in our quarters.”

She pictures Miller, sunk into the couch cushions, slowly shaking his head, the expression on his face equal parts satisfied and amused.

"Really? That's what you think is the oddest part of all this?"

"Yeah, Bry, I do. Would you prefer I gloat? About being right this whole time? Who says she's just a legend now?"

My current idea is to still start with dialogue, but to move back into a significant amount of description pretty immediately afterward, and only then add more dialogue. Even this is a little hazy, since I haven’t thought much about this fic in a while. But I do think it’s quite clear this won’t work.

As for how I DO start chapters/scenes/stories… I like to start with a strong image that sets the scene and mood of the story, and hopefully leaves the reader wanting to know more. Here are some examples of story openings I’ve written recently, which I like a lot:

When Bellamy is angered, deafening bouts of thunder shake the heavens.

The cawing of the crows—high, sharp, angry shots of sound. The buzzing of the telephone wires.

Marcus Kane's body shows up again in June, skeletal and rotting, six months after his disappearance at the turn of the year.

The sky has turned a bruised yellow, like the inside of a plum, by the time Bellamy starts seeing the robots in the fields.

At noon on the third-to-last day before Christmas, Murphy leaves the cafe, with a single peppermint mocha and a small paper bag, and heads right, walking parallel to the ocean.

The last one doesn’t seem as interesting but consider: you get the who, what, when, and where, the mystery of the paper bag and where he might be going, and also the immediate understanding that this is probably going to be a Fluffy Beach Christmas story—which is correct, that’s exactly what it is.

I’m not saying that I’m always creative or unique. I often start stories off with descriptions of the weather. And I have committed the ~~cardinal sin~~ of starting with a character waking up, heaven forbid. I don’t have any hard and fast rules for myself other than that I try to avoid dialogue, or at least, be careful about its use (another example: I use dialogue to start off Mad Women—but it reads like narration, until it’s rudely interrupted, a sort of in-joke/reference/twist). I try to match the mood of the story and, as I said, include something that will create a question for the reader, some version of why, that the rest of the story will answer.

Day 61: Do you describe the weather? Try changing a scene you wrote by adding weather effects.

After writing a book for the last question, here’s an easy one! Yes, I describe the weather. A lot. Often. In detail.

(Though if we’re talking about the Sleeping Beauty AU as my “current wip,” I actually don’t do much weather describing there, because 4 of the 6 chapters take place in a location with no weather.)

Day 62: What is your favorite thing to write about?

Honestly I like to write about people being dramatic about their emotions. That’s what I’ve discovered while writing my surprisingly self-indulgent Troped fic: I want to describe people acting as if Everything was the Most Ever. It’s fun. Part of this is getting into the usual romantic tropes—longing, pining, exaggerated touches and glances and the like—but why stop at romance when you also have stuff like The Weather and Random Feelings to contemplate?

I also like setting scenes that I find soothing, which is part of why I like Seasonal Stories.

Day 63: Are you more of a drabble/flash or a longfic/novel kind of writer?

I’m in the middle. I mostly write one-shots, and I’ve noticed that a lot of them fall in the 4-6k range. Long one-shots can get all the way to 10-12k but I feel like most of those are, semi-objectively speaking, too long, and would probably have been stronger if they were pruned down to 6k, or, better yet, never made it past 6k in the first place.

I have written some multi-chapters, or, uh, started multi-chapters, but I’m VERY bad at it. The only thing that makes me slightly less bad is being stubborn. Hence the existence of a WIP that I’ve had going for over 10 years now and refuse to call abandoned. Hence this year’s extended angst about the Sleeping Beauty AU, which is only 6 chapters but has taken me literally years to write. I don’t honestly know if I’ve ever finished a multi-chapter WIP, like, properly speaking. I’ve done some short multi-chapters that I wrote as if they were one-shots and then split up for ease of reading or, I dunno, just because. I wrote a Big Bang once, but it’s not very good. Nor very long, if I remember correctly. Generally speaking I probably shouldn’t be allowed to write novels lol—I have a lot of them in my ‘I should write this one day’ idea list—but as it so happens, no one can stop me, so here we are. I definitely have wild fantasies of writing multi-chapters with ease but I’m just a very slow writer and my ideas can’t keep up with my actual-writing. Thus one shots are much easier than multi-chaps, and one-shots on a deadline are much easier than ‘I’ll finish this whenever’ one-shots. One-shots written for events or exchanges also tend to be shorter (and, imo, better) because of the deadlines they’re written on, and are thus more likely to hit that sweet 4-6k spot than stories where I’m allowed to ramble at will.

All that said, I ALSO write a good number of drabbles/writing exercises. I used to write them more often than I do now, but still over the last five years I’ve produced 110,000+ words in free-standing scenes so like… that’s also a thing I guess.

#100 days of writing #my 100 days of writing #100daysofwriting

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crystalblueskie · 5 years

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I got bored and wrote some jokes. Tell me if you like them.

So, to get started let me tell you a little something about my family. My mom is disabled and so she has a service dog named Callie Ann...that is such a country white girl name, Callie Ann, amirite? Anyways, so this dog obviously goes everywhere with us: doctors offices, grocery store, restaurants. Normal service dog stuff, you know? But for some reason, everybody stares at her like it's the weirdest thing they've ever seen. A dog wearing a vest walking around Target... I use Target because Walmart is too controversial. Walmart: EVIL!! Target: fair game. Walmart: Trump Target:...any other president. Anyways: dog wearing a vest walking around Target, a vest that blatantly say "SERVICE DOG" on it mind you and random people like to just walks up to us as we and the dog are minding our own business and ask "Is she a service dog?" *Stares bewildered* and every time I'm thinking in my head "I DON'T KNOW, WHY DON'T YOU ASK HER VEST!"..."no, no ma'am we just slapped a service dog vest on her so she can go everywhere with us. Thank you for asking. Goodbye. Have a nice day." Another thing about this dog, I love her to death I really do. It's fun we have a young dog in the house again, she loves to play with anything that squeaks or makes a weird noise, I'm getting exercise again! Yay! But my mother takes it to a WHOLE 'NOTHER LEVEL!! We'll out shopping...*whispers* at Target...and we'll walk past the dog section... I'm trying to walk past as fast as possible. My mom stops right at the mouth of the aisle and walks down it. Shit, I know how this goes. My mom and her dog happily trot down the aisle and her dog smells all of the toy until eventually she smells a toy for more than three seconds...my mom is ready. She talks in that annoying baby voice, you know the voice right? *in an annoying baby voice* "Do you like that toy? Yeah! You like that toy? You want that toy? I'm gonna get you that toy!" SHIT. Toy goes in the cart...We end up leaving the store with more dog treats and a goddamn dog toy. Ever. Single. Time. And I'm over here thinking, if I got a toy every time we left the house as a child, I would have more toys than my tiny, little, ADD-riddled brain could handle. Now a days I'm a old 24 years old. If you don't know what that means, it means I'm mentally 24 years old and physically 80 years old. I'll be walking around the house like this *walks around like an old lady holding my back* and my mom will be looking at me and ask "what the hell are you doing?" And I'll yell back to her "what does it look like? My back hurts!!" I look outside "Get the hell of my lawn, you mangy kids!!" Anyways that obviously means I am a young millennial, which basically means that I remember when Netflix was delivered to your front porch and when Blockbuster was a thing. Also, I was told I needed to go to college or I wouldn't amount to anything. Jokes on them, I still didn't amount to anything. I got a Bachelors in Individualized Studies which means I was indecisive about my major and when I graduated I got a piece of paper basically thanking me for my participation. After 5 years of college, I got a piece of paper thanking me for participating in college. Think about that. This is what happened, I was originally going to school to become a teacher, but to become a teacher you must first waste your time taking a bunch of bullshit teaching classes like "How to teach Math" and then after about 3 years you have to submit a portfolio answering questions such as "Why do you want to become a teacher?" Maybe because I need a job and I was told the only way to get one that pays well was to go to college and I like kids sometimes and I took a course in school where I was basically a teachers assistant for 2 credits a semester and this seemed like the easiest job to get at the rip old age of 18. WRONG!! I was so very wrong!! What my teachers and professors failed to tell me was that to even get accepted into my colleges teaching program is not only do we have to answer the portfolio questions is: you have to pass 2 tests. This is what the TAKS tests were really preparing me for. One test was on Math. At this point, I have not done basic Mathematics in 2 years. The other test was on English and Grammar. I have barely passed my English courses with C's my entire life. The cards were not in my favor. You get approximately 60 minutes to finish each test. They take you into this office and you get a little locker and a key in exchange for your Drivers License. You are expected to place your phone and your purse or bag in the locker. They then place you in a separate room with desks with computer lined up against the wall. And at the opposite end of the room, smack in the center is a person that is paid to sit there and make sure you don't cheat. That is their only job, to sit there and stare at you like this *stares around room* am I making you nervous? *whispers* good. Because that is exactly how I felt the entire 60 minutes. And the thing is they don't even give you scratch paper for the math portion, just a TI-84 calculator. You know the ones that cost like 250 dollars and were fucking MANDATORY in middle school? Little secret about those calculators, they have 4 games on them. Yup. Found that out really quick. I used to sit in class on my calculator and the teachers would be none the wiser as I played the same game on my expensive calculator for the whole hour. I still play on it to this day. Anywho, no scratch paper, just an expensive calculator that I can play games on but forgot how to graph on. And I don't know about you guys, but I can't do math in my head like some people, I'm not wired that way. So, I had to go up to the creepy guy paid to stare at us and ask him for scratch paper. At one point I got so involved in solving a problem that I kept getting answers that were not multiple choice options, that I ran out of time and automatic failed 8 out of about 50 questions. A month later I found out that I somehow managed to get a B on a test I didn't finish. *whispers* I'll take it. So, the first time I turned in my portfolio, I had the tests scores that they were looking for but not the detailed answers to their profound questions. I obviously did not get into the teaching education program the first time. A year later I was allowed to turn in my portfolio again. This time I got smart, I made my sister proofread and rewrite my answers for the incentive of 100 dollars of my financial aid. *whispers* I got in. Now at this point, you're probably wondering why I told you all of this and why I don't have a Bachelors in Early Childhood Education like I intended after I went through the torture of 5 years of college and my acceptance into the TEP and the answer to that is, I showed up to the TEP orientation to be told that I had to take 2 more years of teaching courses and at that point I had been in college for nearly 5 years and I was like "There is no way in Hell that I was going to graduate after nearly 7 years of college just to teach children how to count and what the primary colors are." That was probably my biggest mistake in life. Just FYI, all of your childhoods are a lie. Red and Blue are not Primary colors. Cyan, Magenta, and Yellow are the true Primary colors according to the art wheel. To those of you that don't know Cyan can also be called Sky Blue and Magenta is a bright shade of Pink. We good? Good. The definition of a Primary color is a color that cannot be made by combining any two colors. They just exist in the world as is. Still good? Okay. Blue and Red by definition are not Primary colors because they can be made by combining two colors. Blue can be made by combining Cyan and Magenta. Red by combining Yellow and Magenta. They are by definition Secondary colors, colors that can be made by combining two primary colors. Look at that, you came out to have a good time and I tricked you into learning something, I am a teacher. I'm just kidding, I'm lying I didn't always know that. I always thought the Primary colors were Blue, Red, and Yellow just like all of you. I learned that how everyone learns things nowadays, YouTube. Anyways, moving on. The other day I couldn't sleep to save my soul, I had insomnia. And I noticed the weird way that I lay in my bed. It looks a little something like this. *walks over to a pillow and Petunia laying in the middle of the floor* One moment I'll be laying like this *places right foot on side of left knee* You think that ones weird wait until you see the next one. Next minute I'll turn over and be laying like this *place left foot on top of right knee* and then I'll turn over again and do this *pull legs up closer to my body and place them slightly apart* I don't know what this one is, it's like when Deadpool got ripped in half by Juggernaut in Deadpool 2, sorry spoilers. And his lower half has to regrow and he's standing there in front of the remainder of X-Force and Cable but his legs are that of a toddler. That's what this looks like to me, a grown ass person with baby legs trying to run away from something. And then I'll turn over AGAIN and do this *lays almost on front and places left foot of the side of right knee* know this one , this ones not even a sleep position, this is the fucking tree pose from my beginners yoga class. *Stands up and does the tree pose placing both palms together.* Just *hums yoga hum*. That's what that is right there. Haha. I got so bored one morning around 6 o'clock that I decided to clean the mess that was my closet. I had shoes thrown all over the floor of the closet and smack in the middle was a laundry basket that had all the clothes I had ever worn in 3 months. I opened the doors up *pretends to open doors* and I just screamed *screams* and then promptly fainted. Right in front of my closet. That is how messy it was. And the ironic part is that I have OCD. That mess was too much for my tiny, little OCD-riddled brain could handle at 6 in the morning. Which was ironic considering the fact that I had been living with it for 3 months and my OCD didn't seem to mind. But the minute my brain decided it wanted to clean that mess, suddenly my brain was overwhelmed. It took me approximately 2 hours to clean out the junk filled drawers in my dresser and put all of my spring/summer clothes away. Some of you probably noticed I said spring/summer clothes, that is because my autumn/winter clothes do not fit in my room anywhere. So they lay in a tote, a room away, until the temperature starts to drop, and then I would change them out. Men you don't realize this but every girl you know has more clothes than she can count, and some of those clothes, *whispers* she don't even wear. I have a half a closet full of skater dresses, that I wear once in a goddamn blue moon, just because I wanted to feel pretty that day. Interesting thing about switching clothes out, it's not even a new thing. Back in the 19-whatever's girls and women would have a hope chest that was filled with dresses for the spring/summer time when it was autumn/winter outside, and vise versa when it was spring/summer outside. I learned that story from my beautiful mother over there, because one day I pointed to her mothers hope chest and asked what it was used for. Interesting fact about me and my grandmother is that if you look at pictures of her when she was around the age of 13 sitting at the pool, my 13 year old self looked exactly like her, facial expression and all. My grandma unfortunately died of Breast Cancer 5 years after giving birth to my mother, her only surviving biological child. I say "biological child" because after my grandma had so many miscarriages and stillborns, she and my grandpa gave up and went to purchase a child *whipers* from Target. Haha. I'm just kidding, everyone knows that babies come from heaven and that storks carry them down in their beaks to a random families' front porch and leave the baby there to get stepped one when the Husband or Wife goes to check the mail. Probably the Wife, husbands are useless at running errands. You tell a man to go to the store to get 5 items and he comes back with 1 maybe 2 of the items that you had purposely written down on his arm so that he would remember everything. Do women have to do everything? Even figure out what's wrong with our own cars because we've been asking you to do it for 2 months and you keep saying "I'll take a look at it as soon as I have time." "As soon as you have time, bitch? That's right now!! You're sitting on the couch watching goddamned football and drinking beer. Guess what either you can record or pause your game for 15 to 30 minutes or you can sit there watching it and not have anything to eat for dinner, because I was so busy doing your "job", that I forgot to do my "job"." I put quotations around job because I don't understand why the cooking and the cleaning and the children-taking-care of has to be done solely by the woman and why yard work and fixing cars and sitting-on-there-all-day-watching-the-game-while pretending-to-take-care-of-the-children has to be done solely by a man. I don't work like that. Everyone can do any household job. For example, I have broken the side mirror of my moms car 2 times now. Do you think I was just like "Oh, well, I don't know how to fix a mirror I'll have to take it to Chris to get it fixed." Just FYI, Chris is a real person, he's my mechanic for things that I can't fix on my own. Hey, Chris! I didn't just give up, I did what every person in my generation do, I turned to YouTube and typed into the search bar "How to change the side mirror of a 2005 Ford Focus" *ding* Millions of videos pop up. I click on one, I watch it, I now know the basics for how to change a side mirror on a car, I took me exactly 5 minutes to learn it. How long did it take you Chris? Since then I have now replaced 3 of my mothers side mirrors. One on the drivers side that she did, and two on the passenger side that I did pulling in and out of the garage. Both times. YouTube has gotten ridiculous. Remember way back when when it was filled with music videos and people would post videos of them singing along to the songs. Nowadays, you can search anything on YouTube and find a video on it. For example type in "how to get mangy kids off my lawn" and you will most likely find a ridiculous video on how to keep children and dogs off your lawn. I love YouTube, I watch a lot of gaming videos, some Youtubers that I watch are Markiplier, Jacksepticeye, the GameGrumps (creators of the fabulous game DreamDaddy), The Fine Brothers or FBE, Graveyardgirl or Bunny, and Good Mythical Morning with Rhett and Link. Search any of these Youtubers and watch their videos, and you will not be disappointed. I love how there's a channel out there for any genre. Baking, Cooking, Make-up, Video Games, React Video, and ,my personal favorite, rant videos. Do you guys remember when Chris Crocker did the "Leave Britney Alone" video? He was ugly crying and I'm pretty sure wearing mascara and guy liner and he just keeps yelling into the camera for 30 seconds straight "LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE!! LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE!! YOU *points at person* LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE AND YOU *points at a different person* LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE!!!" And it just goes on like that for 30 seconds of a guy ugly crying over Britney fucking Spears. You thought girls where the best ugly criers, you were wrong, it's the gays. Gays overpower all girl powers by like a 100. A girl will be like "Look at my make up isn't it nice?" And a gay guy with jump out of nowhere add flawlessly apply FaceOff quality make up and be like "you look beautiful, do you like my sexy alien?". Anyways, I just love YouTube, I could watch YouTube video of people playing scary games that look interesting to me but I'm too scared to play *whispers * all day long.

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andrewuttaro · 5 years

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New Look Sabres: GM 28 - NJD - Birthday Wish

7-1 Win

The Buffalo Sabres are normally on the receiving end of tremendous beatings, at least for the last decade or so. Last night we got a rare taste of what it was like destroying a team by a lacrosse score line. It was something else. Less than seven minutes into the first period it was probably over. I was thinking about the future of several players careers… Devils players! The consensus on Sabres twitter seems to be this game came at just the right time. This club had the roughest of Novembers but had the points in the bank from October to make up the difference. They spent all those savings and as Thanksgiving came and went they began to find their footing again. After a promising home-and-home with the Leafs a convincing win to solidify the gains of a decent stretch of games was needed. A convincing win that was in fact a win in regulation against a team you should handle. New Jersey came knocking asking if we remembered the Home Opener. Whether it was the 50th Anniversary jerseys or 1970s figures present at the game that jogged their memory, the Buffalo Sabres remembered. That game, the second one of this season, was a rout. But this rout makes that rout look like herding cats. When I said this game was over in seven minutes earlier, I mean it was pretty well over in seven minutes. But before we pile on the Devils I thought I’d share with you some thoughts I had about some great players on their roster whom this game made me feel for. Will Butcher: you passed up Buffalo for what you thought would be better. It was for a time but here we are. PK Subban: I love you bud… but this game showed that scary trend is real. Your advanced numbers are garbage, I hope your next destination helps out. Wayne Simmons: Dude, please don’t retire after this. You deserve better than this awfulness. Taylor Hall: well… huh… we both know you’re not going back to Edmonton. When you go win a Cup with Colorado this June please don’t pass the Cup to Nazem Kadri or Nikita Zadorov. For some reason Sabres twitter loves to roast itself during that part of the Final and those two guys minus well be BBQ Chefs. Let’s get down to business.

The Buffalo Sabres came out aggressive. Yeah, I say that a lot here in the second paragraph of postgame; but this time the New Jersey Devils also came out aggressive, AGGRESSIVELY BAD! The Sabres had two goals before the Devils had a shot on goal. That’s right: let me clear my throat played twice before Linus Ullmark was even tested. To be exact the shots were 3-0 Buffalo five minutes in and that was good for a 2-0 lead. Unreal, right? The first goal was right after a Sabres powerplay ended and Jack Eichel was all alone in front of Louis Dominque and just tapped it against the guys pads. It trickled in and everyone was surprised. Hardly two minutes later New Jersey just could not make a clean zone exit and Jeff Skinner had the puck one-on-one with a now annoyed Dominque. Skinner tucked it in far side with a quick little slapper and there are your two goals against zero shots. Up next, not even two minutes later, Jeff Skinner’s third or… whatever non-numbered line we’re calling it, hauling Larsson and Sheary behind like a Christmas tree on a punch buggy mind you, pull off a goal you are more likely to see in the All Star game when all the guys are just trying trick shots they joked about in college then in a real NHL game. Jeff Skinner skates into the zone backwards with speed because the Devils did not know what they were doing in their own zone and crosses the gut of the ice like a figure skater to shoot the puck backwards at the net. That shot didn’t go in because this isn’t a video game, Jeff. However Louis Dominque blocked it with a pad and the resulting rebound was punched in by a Conor Sheary halfway onto his ass. It’s now 3-0 and I think this was the part where Dominque got pulled. No that wasn’t until the first intermission.

After goal three John Hynes and the Devils coaching staff took a time out to try and stop the bleeding. They did for a little bit. It was about ten minutes later when the Devils had finally figured out this shots on net thing but were still giving up D-Zone turnovers juicer than a holiday ham. Conor Sheary just takes a pot shot from a shite angle and Dominque gets his stick glove on it sending it up in the air. Carter Hutton must have watched this play on the bench thinking he’s not alone anymore. The puck goes straight up, and Dominque even watches a little bit of it’s hangtime. Then it just lands in the goal behind him like a letter delivered by a carrier pigeon. What a game already: its 4-0. Sheary skates the bench in celebrating with a “Idk, it just went in” look on his face. All you Monday night folks who paid for the cheapest Sabres tickets of the season so far got your money’s worth and more. But wait, there’s more! We’re in the last minute of the first period. Folks are filing up the stairs to get to the pisser before others and what happens. Casey Mittelstadt just dumps a puck off to Rasmus Asplund in the offensive zone and Asplund just goes “whatever” and one times it like he’s friggin Alex Ovechkin. It went in: 5-0 because this was Buffalo’s night evidently. That was Asplund’s first NHL goal. The kid who just got called up because of injuries and looked like an NHLer gets rewarded faster than maybe any other recent callup. And so the first period ends… *laughs in disbelief* 5-0 Buffalo.

This game was Founders Night. They had family of the Knox Brothers, the founders of the franchise, in attendance for a pregame ceremony. Apparently there was a giant birthday cake and birthday guard. Fun trivia: 50 Years ago on December 2nd the NHL formally granted Buffalo an expansion franchise. The club wouldn’t get named the Sabres for a little over five months but that’s a birthday even if there wasn’t a name. Perhaps the birthday wish was for lots of goals because 5-0 in the first period was not the end by a longshot. Three minutes into the second period PK Subban and Colin Miller have a little spat and the resulting penalties make it 4-on-4. I don’t know how to put this for children: Victor Olofsson sent a puck to heaven. Olofsson unleashed a slapshot that may soon be outlawed by the Geneva Conventions. The broadcast team didn’t know it went in until the horn went off. Ben Mathewson did a 60 frames per second (fps) replay of the goal and there isn’t really more than a couple frames between the slapshot and McKenzie Blackwood realizing the puck had gone in. It was the hardest goal any Sabre has shot this season. 6-0 Sabres and I really want to apologize to the Devils fans in attendance. This had to be embarrassing. I am so sorry. It wouldn’t be a shutout though guys. Zemgus Girgensons got called for tripping and New Jersey made the most of the powerplay when Nico Hischier sauced in a rebound past Linus Ullmark. 6-1 Sabres, the shutout is gone but the Devils are still angry evidently: Casey Mittelstadt is tripped by Kyle Palmieri, the ref blows it against him and before Mittelstadt is up Palmieri launches the puck at him in a temper tantrum. Mind you the Devils are now out-shooting the Sabres 2 to 1 but the Sabres are locking it down. This was the performance we needed. This was our birthday wish for the Sabres. The Sabres made Palmieri and the Devils pay for that trip and Henri Jokiharju fired a laser from the blue line to make it 7-1 for the home team. At this point we just crossed the halfway point of the game. Buffalo has scored a touchdown and Josh Allen didn’t even throw for it. This game was so good 71-year-old Mike Robitaille was telling 51-year-old Rob Ray that advanced stats are just splendid on the broadcast. It was a savagely beautiful disarming of the trap Ray had set. The Sabres were dunking on the Devils and Boomers were dunking on Boomers about advanced stats. This was such a wildly fun game we’re going to look back on it in two weeks and think it was some collective dream we had.

And it seemed meant to be like some kind of fairy tale! The third period had its scary moments, a couple Devils powerplays and a handful of defensive lapses for the home team but the end result never really seemed in question. Buffalo won in regulation 7-1. This game was everything. Jack Eichel’s point streak continues, he now has 38 points in 28 games on pace for a 111-point season. If he doesn’t make the all-star team we can rightfully conclude this league is rigged against Buffalo. Victor Olofsson probably deserves to go as well. Not only is he scoring at 5-on-5 now but he is leading the team in multi-point games; yes even more than Eichel. Friggin Johan Larsson had a career night: he got three points in a game, all on assists, for only the second time in his career. Think about every shocked or mother-of-god meme you got: that was this game. It was memeable! I can’t imagine they dominate like this every night but like, comment and share this blog to join the fun. Sabres After Dark returns Thursday night for a game in Calgary. I want some revenge for the Thanksgiving Eve myself but by that point my end-of-semester crunch week will be winding down, so I’ll probably settle for just some enjoyable sex puns. I got a pair of those oven mitts they gave away for the Thanksgiving Eve game, let’s hope the Sabres stay hot so I need them! Let’s Go Buffalo!

Thanks for Reading.

P.S. I don’t think the Bills catch New England for the division but let’s just savor the fact they’re one game back and that such a scenario is a realistic possibility at all. Just enjoying being a fan, I don’t think they catch em either but I’m going to enjoy this well it lasts!

#buffalo sabres #Hockey #NHL #blog

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airoasis · 5 years

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Why College Is So Expensive In America

New Post has been published on https://hititem.kr/why-college-is-so-expensive-in-america-2/

Why College Is So Expensive In America

College in the usa: it’s 4 years of all nighters, keg stands, ethnically numerous welcome brochures, Pinterest excellent dorm rooms and crushing student debt. I have $69,812, $47,000, $90,000, $35,000, $350,000, $60,000 worth of student loans. My minimal student loan cost is $1,000 a month. It must take me about 10 years to pay that again, I might be roughly 36, 45-years-ancient, I have no idea how historical i will be once I pay that off. I was genuinely on campus at Penn State and that i noticed that I had so much to pay and it just was once overwhelming. I did not know easy methods to do it, I not ever saw a number that large. I just went to institution for a number of months found out that it was no longer what I desired at all, and now i have this forty thousand additional dollars that I need to pay and nothing fairly to show for it. If I wasn’t paying this student debt, oh my God, i would just make investments all of my cash. It appears like i’ll have a roommate for the leisure of my lifestyles given that my debt is a lot.You can’t factor at anyone and say, this person made your pupil debt load a lot more, it can be the whole approach. So why is institution so highly-priced, and is it valued at it? Greater schooling today is made up of three major sectors. All of them bring in cash from lessons however the place they get the relaxation of their income varies. Public schools are your state colleges like SUNY or Iowa state. They get cash from the government. Personal for-profit faculties just like the college of Phoenix or Capella school get cash from shareholders. And confidential non-profits are these like Yale an American institution, they get quite a lot of their money from donors. More on that later. However deciding on a college hasn’t continually been so intricate. In 1636, the united states’s first institution used to be based. You might have heard of it earlier than, Harvard school For 1000s of years tuition in the united states used to be an attractive distinguished club to get into.However we’ve got come far from Harvard’s first graduating classification of just nine guys in 1642. In 2018 more than three million americans have been expected to receive a college measure. The demographics of american bigger education have been utterly transformed. In 1944 the G.I. Bill used to be signed into legislation giving veterans money to attend tuition. The G.I. Invoice of Rights looks after the money finish too. That’s correct. Tuition is looked after. Money are supplied for laboratory expenses, books, supplies and equipment are included. Only a few years later, close to half of of usa citizens enrolled in school had been veterans. You can not underestimate the G.I. Invoice. This informed an entire new release of men and a few women too. And it opened the doors humans who hadn’t even proposal that they would go to institution. The G.I. Invoice modified what American households could aspire to. But no longer all people was once capable to take full abilities of the invoice’s advantages.It was enormously tougher for females and men and women of color to get the schooling money and sign up in university for the reason that of the fashionable discrimination through both faculties and banks. Dateline Russia 1957. In a moment the story. In the 50s a bit seashore ball sized satellite launched into area by way of the Soviet Union had a enormous have an impact on on the American education process. The primary Sputnik. Folks have been worried about this clash between the Soviet Union and the us.And suddenly it was once preferred to be taught science and math. It was patriotic. In the 60s the civil rights motion helped push the doorways open even wider to provide ladies and people of colour entry to larger schooling. In these years scholars at institution of California colleges paid not up to a thousand bucks in registration expenses. No lessons if you happen to had been a resident. However with the 70s came the taxpayer revolt. If you wish to have whatever you pay for it. Do not expect me to pay for it. It’s your crisis no longer mine. And so what occurred was the student mortgage procedure exploded. After which got here the U.S. Information and World document. It used to be one of the crucial luckiest or most ingenious publishing decisions ever. In 1983 U.S. News and World document published a list of the united states’s pleasant schools. It became a particularly data driven rating. Every one of the most standards that U.S. News used trusted name attention, natural pleasant, prestige and most of all wealth. Rankings played a colossal factor for me. I was once an athlete and so I was once lovely aggressive. There have been a ton of new lists considering that the 1983 rating but the united statesNews and World file nonetheless reigns king. And faculties preserve a lovely shut eye on it. When you ask them they are going to say they pay no concentration to it. But inside the conference rooms of the admissions place of business and provost places of work throughout the land, i can guarantee you they pay very close awareness to it. One thing they are paying attention to are their test score averages. By the 90s, schools began boosting base tuition and utilizing the extra cash to give merit founded scholarships to youngsters who tested good. The chief information strategist at u.S.News and World file downplayed experiment ratings as a important component of their rating, pronouncing it is less than eight percentage of the methodology today. And that "we have noticeable colleges participate in first-rate in the rankings if they emphasize and participate in strongly in pupil end result areas like commencement and retention premiums. He additionally mentioned they additional cut down the weight of SAT and ACT rankings. Training expenses at both public and private faculties have doubled considering that the late 80s, even while you account for inflation.Even so, more american citizens have become university degrees. But state funding for public universities has taken a hit. States spent less on bigger schooling in 2017 than they did in 2008 earlier than the recession. And that implies students are spending more. The tutoring they are paying is a gigantic moneymaker for faculties. 2017 was once the first 12 months ever that most state schools bought more money from tuition than they did from govt funding. If you’re sitting in the state legislature and you are watching for cash, the school method is one of your largest expenditures. So when you realise well we cut them 2 percentage last yr, they failed to go out of business. Let’s reduce them one other 2 percent. What happens is you go the buck.It goes from the taxpayer to the pupil. The normal scholar graduates with about $37,000 in scholar debt altogether. The U.S. Has $1.5 trillion dollars of it. I had this mind-set that I used to be gonna go to tuition undergrad after which I was once gonna go to grad institution and get my PhD. I proposal that i might get by way of it and then come out on the other side with a job and then be ready to pay it off. But that didn’t go in line with plan. Rachel Brandt acquired her undergraduate levels in math and economics from Iowa State. Then she moved to ny to pursue her master’s in economics. She left grad institution after her first semester to raised cope with intellectual health problems she was once going by means of. I inspiration that i’d just withdraw and be pleasant. However then a couple of weeks after I withdrew, I received an e-mail from the university pronouncing that I owed them $6,000 right away.And that was hard. So I didn’t understand how I was once going to pay that. And that used to be very traumatic. Three, 4, five, six, seven exceptional pupil loans that each one need to be paid with unique interest rates. The quantity just continues going up. I shall be paying $867 in employ a month and that is about how much i will ought to be paying in loans. I appear at my bank account day-to-day and it’s very scary. Rachel is a ways from the one one not to finish a measure she began. Handiest about 57 percentage of undergrads whole their measure inside six years.One alternative pupils flip to for a extra bendy and at times more low-priced route to a measure are for-profit schools like institution of Phoenix or DeVry university. The industry has been in flux, however at present just a little more than 900,000 students attend for-revenue schools in the U.S., many of whom use federal loans to support quilt the fee. I suppose like I wish to do whatever sensible that may that would evidently result in a distinctive job. The art Institute of NY city was once advised to me. Now, I rather regret that it was because it grew to become out to be a horrible fiscal experience. Regardless of for-profits being just a small fraction of all schools within the U.S., for-revenue pupils default on their scholar debt at a a lot higher expense. Chyna is a primary new release college pupil from new york who studied web design and interactive media on the art Institute of New York city when it was once run as a for-revenue.I withdrew from the university, that used to be some thing might have totally taught myself making use of tutorials. For-profit schools date the entire approach back to colonial times. Now not each person would attend associations like Harvard, so entrepreneurs noticed a business possibility and started educating studying, writing and trade talents *** for a rate. Benjamin Franklin was a colossal fan of for-revenue schools and the functional competencies they offered. In 1994, university of Phoenix’s dad or mum manufacturer Apollo schooling group went public and laid the groundwork for the for-revenue schooling enterprises of in these days. But this gigantic trade method to schooling hasn’t come with out controversy. With a lot money on the line many turn to the colleges that show the pleasant numbers, the pleasant chances at a new job when you graduate. But can you consider what a few of these for revenue schools let you know? Once I went there for the so-known as tour it was once it was truly a income pitch. That must have been a red flag but it surely wasn’t on the grounds that I was once 18, no longer having moms and dads who completed tuition, you recognize, being a first iteration student it’s like I did not have the discernment to only depart those variety of faculties on my own.The art Institute didn’t reply to a request for remark. However the director of Cato’s middle for educational Freedom defended the for-profit method, announcing non-gains make some huge cash too. They simply distribute it in a different way. He stated natural faculties by and large use it to "make the lives of persons working in them extra comfortable." He also mentioned all people in better education is almost certainly seeking revenue and there is little evidence that folks in for revenue colleges are less enthusiastic about scholars excellent interest.Considering the fact that Chyna left, the artwork Institute of NY city along with 43 different artwork Institute campuses shut down. There are a quantity of lawsuits towards various campuses. However Chyna’s not capable to qualify for loan forgiveness seeing that she left the university just earlier than the cutoff date. And he or she feels trapped. When you consider that she hasn’t paid off her scholar loans in full, she’s no longer in a position to get her transcript, which she needs that to use to state faculties. So for now she’s enrolled in one other for-profit university within the hopes of utilising the measure to use to a master’s program at a state institution. I think like several these for-revenue colleges they prey on humans who are already who come from low income backgrounds.Enter the non-profits. Amari Lilton is from St. Louis but went to undergrad at a personal university in Chicago. Now she works at an promoting company in New York city and is paying off her greater than $40,000 in student debt. You wish to have to have the tuition dream with out the pupil debt, when you consider that you’re just coming into some thing and you consider like i am gonna have all this independence i’ll be competent to pick my possess classes i’ll have this freedom I’ve certainly not had earlier than. So you need to move to the coolest position which you could. Each school wants to be the first-class. They wish to compete with the next university. They wish to appeal to the highest pupils. That suggests they have got to have the quality facilities they must construct new structures. And consider lessons discounting? Whilst the sticky label price of non-revenue faculties are rising, so is the tuition reduction rate. The cost you see on a university website is greater than what many scholars grow to be surely paying.You may consider that many of the money is going to the rate of running the institution, however practically half of of undergrad training at non-profits goes to aid other people pay for their education. Amari didn’t pay the whole cost of tuition at her confidential tuition however she’s still facing extra debt than she used to be anticipating. I just cried. Yeah I simply cried considering I had no clue how I was going to do it. I dream about it. It is continuously on my mind. If i am like going out to lunch and i’m going to just say, oh my God i am hoping this goes through given that i know they simply took my cash out. I just hope, i am hoping. I need to double my repayments by way of the tip of this year so $2,000 a month.My purpose is to no longer go into my 30s with debt. If i go to Wells Fargo and say like I need a portfolio with all my great investments support me out, they is not going to take me significantly due to the fact that i’ve $250 in the bank. So the place will we go from right here? I have been studying this for a very long time and advocating for reform and that is the hardest sort of challenge to fix on the grounds that it can be structural. It is every body.It’s the entire market. Jarrett Freeman ran for big apple State Senate in 2016 when he was once simply 26 years historical. I declare my candidacy for the big apple State Senate. And a giant a part of his platform was once education and pupil debt. I was really on campus and that i noticed that I had a lot to pay and it simply used to be overwhelming. I didn’t comprehend find out how to do it. I certainly not noticed a quantity that tremendous. Americans are becoming much less satisfied that a school degree is valued at it. In 2013, fifty three percentage of folks notion a 4 12 months degree was once worth it. In 2017 only 49 percent of folks proposal so.I believe that it can be so ingrained to your head that you simply have to go to college, that school is your next step after graduation. I consider in hindsight I see that tuition is just not for all people. Total I suppose a bit of jaded about institution being valued at it for all people, or at the least for scholars immediately out of excessive college. Knowing what i do know now, i’d have even taken a couple of years off earlier than I went to college.There is this proposal that 18-year-olds are supposed to understand what they want in existence. And now that i’m turning 25 day after today, I nonetheless have no idea precisely what is going on on. That mindset might be a concern for the future job market. It can be expected that by means of 2020, 65 percentage of jobs within the U.S. Would require folks to have some university schooling to even be considered. So there are quite a lot of jobs that require you to spend some money on tuition before they may pay you to work. In lots of instances that sum is some huge cash. Student debt is a national problem. Unluckily we don’t have expenditures on the floor that are actually addressing that. The truth is there traditionally is not just one solution that is going to resolve the whole thing. It’s going to take a variety of one-of-a-kind methods, and unique approaches are being established throughout the united states.Some of the proposed options is an sales share agreement. Practically, rather of getting rid of loans, pupils might agree to repay an investor a percent of their revenue for a set quantity of years after they graduate. The thought has aid from politicians on each side of the aisle and a few colleges are opening to experiment it out. In New York city, Governor Cuomo applied a application that gives core-classification residents free training at select state faculties. And a few billionaires like invoice Gates are giving their own cash to check out and repair the approach. And of direction there may be the concept to offer free institution. I do not believe free school. I suppose that when you provide anyone anything free of charge they do not comprehend the worth of it, and that’s just my opinion, and that i consider that there will have to be some rate associated with it.Free college is a exceptional proposal. I’m totally supportive of free college. The trap is: who’s going to pay the bill? In other international locations taxpayers foot many of the invoice. So rather of paying scholar loans later in existence, you are paying higher taxes. Roughly two dozen countries across the world provide free or almost free institution to its residents. The solution on the whole won’t be that easy within the U.S. However with scholar debt rising and the need for a tuition degree fitting increasingly foremost, the future of American schooling depends upon figuring this out. .

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batterymonster2021 · 5 years

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Why College Is So Expensive In America

New Post has been published on https://hititem.kr/why-college-is-so-expensive-in-america-2/

Why College Is So Expensive In America

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ayz8yf9q-blog · 5 years

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cocaineballs · 5 years

Text

Rant

Trigger warnings: self-harm, mentions of biphobia, minor (or arguably major) spoilers for One Day At A Time and Brooklyn Nine Nine, suicide mentions

I wanna preface this by saying that I’m a queer (bi/gender-fluid/aceflux) latinx (my mom is from Mexico and my dad from Guatemala) who for the most part identifies with she/her pronouns. My mother was born in the late 60s and my father in the late 50s.

I’ve spent the past 14-ish hours watching One Day At A Time because I’ve always seen how good it is and I wanted to finally give it a shot. So, when it came to the episode where Elena comes out to Penelope, I felt so happy to see Elena tell her mom that it felt like a breath of fresh air, which really hit home because that’s what it felt like when I came out to my mom. Albeit, my coming out story when it comes to my mom wasn’t the best.

I was 16, going on 17 and I remember it happening sometime in March, maybe April. I remember specifically because we got some cats a few weeks after in May, and week(s) prior in March two of my dogs had gotten stolen (a month after one of our other dogs got run over. we had three total). I was really depressed, and losing the dogs was the final straw because they were my babies, so I resorted to self-harming. Much like a lot of people I knew who used to self-harm (and I hope to god they’ve gotten the help they need or at least gotten better from where they were) that was not the first time I self-harmed. I had started when I was 13 and it continued until that day in junior year (I believe, part of me still believes there was a time during my senior year that I might have forgotten about, and the more I think about it, it probably did happen).

So, my mom finds out that I cut myself and she goes into hysterics, but why wouldn’t she? I’m not the first daughter of hers to harm herself. I’m not the first kid of hers to be depressed. When I step back and think about it, I think we all -collectively as a family- are depressed. But there’s my mother, seeing these fresh cuts on my forearm and she loses it.

“Que hice mal yo? Adonde fue mal?”

And I’m quick to reassure her that it was nothing to do with her. It was all pent up for over a year. The last time I self-harmed myself before that was the end of Freshman year, in 2015. Sophomore year was the hardest year for me (senior year coming in at a close second) but I managed to stay clean. I was clean for thirteen months! Only for it to all go down the drain.

It was all pent up breakdowns from sophomore year, it was all pent up anger I held about my sister. Only a few months prior, my father told me some shit that still hurts to this day, despite the fact I’ve forgiven him for it -and while it’s important to my point, it’s not at the moment, so that’s something I’ll come back to- and it stayed with me for so long. School was going semi-bad and I was tired of all the drama with friends and with whatever drama was going on at home. Plus, I was still healing from being preyed upon by my mother’s ex -something she still does not know about to this day, nobody does. So the dogs being stolen was the last straw and I harmed myself. I cut myself, I pulled on my hair until balls of it were coming out, I would break nails stabbing them into my palms, I even attempted burning myself once.

So, my mom sees these cuts and she’s crying, blaming herself for it and I’m trying my hardest to tell her that it’s not her fault and my second oldest sister was there, witnessing it all and my niece and nephew were there watching it all go down and I felt so bad. And what hurts most is that it wasn’t the first time my niece was exposed to my cuts, in fact, she was one of the first to see them back when I was thirteen, but she was four going on five at the time, and she understood none of it, she thought I fell and she just said to be careful because she was a kid and that meant more to me than anything. That’s one exchange I still think about a lot. So then my sister leaves and when it’s all quiet and I’m sitting in the aftermath of it all with my mom in the deafening silence, I let it out.

“Ma, me gustan los muchacho...y las muchachas. Soy bi.”

And then the room went quiet again and I felt like a sort of weight was lifted. Because I knew I felt that way since I was 12 and I wanted to tell her since I was 13, but I knew it was too soon. And I don’t know why I decided that was a good time to do it. But I did it and I felt relieved because I let it all out. And she told me,

“Eres muy joven para saber lo que quieres. No sabes lo que quieres.”

And it hurt me so much, and I felt sad and lost and I didn’t know what to do, what to say, how to react. I’d never spoken back to my mom and I never planned on it, now was not the time. Soon after, we went with my sister and her kids on a walk and we all calmed down and it was like things went well after. She slowly came around to the idea and it was beautiful and she can joke about it with me now and she accepts me for who I am, and she loves me and that’s all I can ask for.

But then, there’s my dad. I’m a daddy’s girl. He means the world to me and I’m his only daughter. It seems like nowadays, everyone but him knows. Everyone but him knows his baby more than he does. Because I’m still hiding one of the biggest parts of my identity from him. And everybody asks me why.

“He loves you so much, he’ll never stop loving you over this!!”

But how do I know that? All my life I’ve known my father’s love, and I’m so thankful that I have that privilege. I’m so thankful that he’s been my biggest supporter because everything I do, is for him and for my mom. But how do I know that this won’t change things?

I kept watching One Day At A Time, and the way Elena’s dad walked out on her during her quince, because he couldn’t handle who she was. He thought it was a phase. Made me think of when Rosa Diaz came out to her parents in Brooklyn Nine Nine and they weren’t accepting.

Rosa’s hit home because I have a brother -my oldest brother- who still denies my sexuality. I’ll joke around saying I’m sooooo gay

“Are you really gay?”

I was under the impression everyone knew. “I’m bi but yeah.”

“That’s not real.”

And I’m stunned. So I tell him it’s real and valid and he says it’s not. And that I’m not gay. I can’t be gay if I’m bi, which he still denies and says is invalid. And it sucks having my racist straight brother tell me that I’m not gay. Not even an actual homosexual family member tells me I’m not gay. But I end up deciding to identify with Queer. Because it seemed more open, more universal, more me. Suddenly the comments stop but he still thinks it’s invalid. And I live with that every day. With his closed-mindedness, telling me to pick a side. As if it’s something I can turn on and off or choose from.

But back to my dad. He’s loved me all my life. But then in November of 2016, one of my sisters was taken into the hospital because she was a risk to herself. She was suicidal and the ambulance took her. The cops had been tipped off by her boyfriend and they came to my house, and what sucks, even more, is that it’s not the first time it’s happened. So, I answer the door to the cops again at one in the morning on a school night and my sister is avoiding it. So she’s in the shower, but we’ve been through it before and so they ask me questions and I’m shitting bricks because I’m surrounded by three policemen and I’m alone and I’m sure there’s some weed somewhere in the house. My sister gets out and I go back into my room and I’m all alone. Except I’m not. I step out and there’s a policeman in the dining room of our small apartment doing nothing -probably making sure neither of us blows our brains- and I’m having to sneak around in my own house. So when they leave I call my mom to let her know what happened and soon after I’m texting my dad that I won’t be going to school tomorrow -even though I’m on T3 already and I still have a semester to finish. So he calls me asking me what happened and all I say is family emergency. But how do I tell him that my sister is suicidal? I don’t. So I tell him family emergency and call it a night, but he won’t let it go and he gets mad at me. He calls me and yells at me about why can’t I trust him. I’m sobbing, telling him it’s not my place and he’s only getting angrier by the second.

“Pues si no puedes confiar en mi, pues ya estoy muerto a ti.”

And that sentence is engrained in my mind. His voice as every syllable leaves his lips are engrained in my mind and it sucks because I still think about it two years and two months later. Two weeks later, It’s Thanksgiving and I’m forgiving him because otherwise, he’s alone. My brother on his side won’t spend it with him, I’m the only one who remembers we have a father. I guess I hold that power. I’m the only one of the two of us that still remembers he’s there.

So, I’m watching One Day At A Time, watching Elena’s dad go from loving the soul out of his baby girl to almost hating her for her sexuality because he can’t accept it, and I’m scared. Scared that my dad will do or feel the same. Angry, upset, hatred over my sexuality. I mean, I still like boys, I do. But can he see past me liking girls too? I don’t think I could live with that and it scares me. He’s my dad, he’s my everything and I’m scared of what he’ll think. And sometimes, I think about just not coming out to him at all, but I know I’ll regret it if I don’t. I’ll regret not telling him and I’m scared of losing my dad. I know I’m his baby, he spoils me and that’s not why I love him, but he makes it known he loves me.

I don’t know. I’m in my feelings and coming out to my father is a scary thought. And these shows really triggered me in ways I was not expecting. They’re so great though and I can’t get enough.

#rant #trigger warning #mentions of self harm #mentions of biphobia

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magdathemadam-blog · 6 years

Text

What a day

Today was, well, something of a mixed bag. It began as it usually does, I woke just before my alarm and pop out of bed. I keep it on the other side of the room so I have to get up to turn it off. I stumbled around for a few minutes, awake but unwilling. Since I didn’t have class until 1, I decided to go back to sleep until 9. This is always a mistake. I wake up ready to meet the world (usually) and should stay up until nap time. (I only sleep for a few hours at night and few more hours in the afternoon) I slept until 12:40, make up with a raging migraine, the kind that wraps around your head, telling you that sleep is your only option, but the more you sleep the worse it gets. My eyes feel cloudy, my throat and mouth are dry. Part of me wants to skip my 30- minute singing lesson, but the word Dicipline is printed across my white board in all caps. Its the one thing I lack and what I wish to gain. I throw myself together and make it to class, 5 minutes late but there. It was a beautiful day. The sun was shining but it isn’t hot. A soft breeze carries the scents of new life, melted snow and pine. Every inhale is a pleasant bath that washes away all impurities. My headache is gone within a minute of being outside. I have an urge to stay outside, to cling to the free air. Still, Discipline. I go inside. I love my professor. A wide hipped, small chested woman with curly amber hair, cut into an asymmetrical a line. She has a pure, sweet voice that I could listen to all day. We spend the first ten minutes chatting, laughing about our lives.Then, we practice. The first time is always the roughest. I struggle to stay on. It’s the change in note, from deep to high or high to deep. If the change is gradual, I can do it. If its sudden, I struggle. This is the reason we’ve chosen scarborough fair. The key is higher than I’ve ever done, but my professor insisted that I could do it. After three weeks of practice, I can hit all the notes and my lungs no longer struggle to hold them. I love the way she encourages me. Tells me that she’s impressed, admits whens she does things wrong. She tells me when I’m wrong and gently moves me back to center. I can’t help but think back to every other music instructors I've had, to the man who made me hate my voice.I don't do so with the bitter scorn I used to. I smile. Shes never told me I sound like a rodent or compared me to a dying animal. Instead, she there to adjust my voice, tells me that its like an instrument, with fine tuning anyone can sing well. With fine tuning, my voice can be great. She points out the things she likes, what others will like,. We end with a reminder that next week I’ll perform. I’m looking forward to it, but I do feel a bit of nerves stir in my stomach. I’ve sang in front of people a few times, I love to be in front of an audience. I wander down to trio, the best place to get lunch and feed myself. Chili cheese dog on a slice of wheat bread. I spend some time down there, shooting the breeze with the instructors and some of my fellow students. We talk about graduation, what we want to do afterwards. I give one of them my 60-second sell on AmeriCorps. Once socialization draws to a close, a find a coloring page and doodle. At 3pm, my dicipline alarm goes off. Its time to do my homework. I feel inspired, I’m ready to do it, so I head back to my dorm. Again, the air makes me want to mess off, spend my time outside. Spring fever has begun to set in. I can hardly wait to finish my work so that I might frolic in the fresh grass. When I get into my dorm, my calico Luci Fur, greets me with a trill and rolls onto her back. She loves to flaunt her belly and I’m the only one aloud to pet her there. My laptop rests on the bed, open and playing her favorite playlist. A Dethklok song, Murmaider, thrums its heart beat sound. I spend a fw minutes rubbing her belly and bumping my head along with the beat before I slip the computer onto my lap. I get some work done, not as much as I should, before I take a small cuddle break. Luci is being too cute not to snuggle. I put the laptop next to me and lay down across the bed. I wiggle, trying to find a comfortable possition. Luci purrs and extrends her claws into my face. She pulls me closer. One of my legs is still folded underneath me, the weigth of my body cutting off blood. I pull it out, trying to do so without having to move anything else. My foot pops free and strikes into something hard with the full force of my strength. I feel my laptop fly off of the bed and hear it land. I cant look. I know its broken. I dont need to get up to look. I shielf my face in lucis chest. I dont want to look. I force myself and find that, infact, the screen is destroyed. The upper right corner is a mess of sprider webs, fracturing out across the screen. The rest of it is a chalk white, struggling to blink back on. It’s ruined. I’m such an idiot. Immediately, I look at the time, its not past 5, which means that the IT guys will probably still be in there office. WIthout wasting another second, I shove the technology into its case and rush it to the hospital, like it was my loved one. My voice is tight while I explain whats happened. He doesn’t laugh, he looks quite sympathetic. He explains that theres little he can do, but hooks it up to a spare monitor anyway. He gives me a flash drive and helps me move my files. He tells me I’ll need a new screen but he’ll put it in for free. The screens range from 50-200$ and I have all of 4$ in my account. Once I get what I can onto a flash drive, I wander back towards my dorm. Texting my bestie, I find comfort in her sympathy, though we both know theres nothing to do. My family is not well off but I reach out to my mom anyway. Without my computer, I’ll fail. I tell her what happened and she tells me, regrettably, she has no money. Her voice is sullen and a little defensive. My other siblings would be quick to rage about this. Im sad, but I tell her its ok. It’s my own damn fault, anyway. We spend some time trying to brain storm. I consider taking another loan from the school, but on top of being that much more owed, it’ll take over a week to process. My brother has a computer that he connects to his tv and uses for nothing else. I consider asking if we could switch until the semester is over when my mom intturupts. She’s been struck by genuis. She can bring me her old television and an HDMI cord. The tv was destined for donation; what better way to rehome it then giving it to her child? She excitedly tells me she’ll come over as soon as she’s had her evening coffee and hangs up. Despite the over reaching cloud to depression, I find my sunshine. This will be like a desktop, in some ways better than what I had before. I spend the next hour or so chatting on the phone with my bestie. She reads me her story, teasing me with the unfinished chapter. She finishes just in time, my mother has arrived. She brings me dinner and we spend some time enjoying each others company. Its been several weeks since the last time we got to hang out. She doesn’t feel great and heads home. I set up the television and connect my computer. Ready to finish my homework, I push the televisions on button. It shifts awkwardly under my finger. Nothing else happens.

I meddle with it.

Its broken.

For the first time I feel the cascading wave of defete crash into me. It hurts. My eyes begin to sting, filling with tears. Who the fuck did I piss off? I want to scream, jump up and down and cry.

Of course, I dont want to bother any of the little snow flakes, so I just stare at the two screen. One blank and emotionless, the other a twitching, shattered mess. With a deep breath a turn the tv towards me and examine the button. I fiddle with it for several minutes. I will not let this happen.

Mark me, if I have to tear this apart and rebuild the entire thing from bolts, I will.

The tv lights up, a dim blue-grey glow.

It works!

I take a picture, send it to my mom and bestie before I sit down and finish my homework.

It’s after midnight. My day is finally over. My head has begun to hurt again, but I’m not ready for bed. Instead, I get on tumblr and blog about the day I’ve had.

#feels like spring #worked out #thank god #broken computer #story #my day #life #thats life #lol #kinda funny?#thankful for good friend #my mom is the best #awesome #bad day #sorta good #im bad at tagging #I wont fail #dicipline

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letsimportanttreecollection-blog · 6 years

Text

Car Insurance, including APR?

"Car Insurance, including APR?

So, im looking for car insurance and I found the cheapest one for me. 'A deposit of 70.00 payable by credit or debit card followed by 10 monthly instalments by Direct Debit of 55.90. Total payable is 629.00 including APR of 29.6%.' What does it mean including APR of 29.6% That I will have to pay an extra 29.6%. Its my 3rd year driving and I've never seen this before.

BEST ANSWER: Try this site where you can compare quotes: : http://howmuchisinsurance.xyz/index.html?src=tumblr

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Car Insurance, including APR?

Need auto insurance...please help for insurance agents?

My auto insurance will not be renewed due to a very bad judgment on my part (I own my mistakes) My car was stolen when I loaned it to my ex-boyfriend' in Mexico.....I freaked out and 'lied' about where the car was stolen from. The car was found by my ex-boyfriend a few days later and I notified my insurance; I told them the truth what happened owing to my lie and I dropped the clam. They are not renewing my insurance stating that I am 'high risk' My question is this....will I be able to get other insurance? I have NO tickets, accidents, no claims, no bad driver record anything. I am STILL covered now and seeking other insurance, does the new insurance have access to what the old insurance said? Again, I have coverage until the end of Jan. '09, and nothing else wrong EVER although I know what I did was very wrong.....I just freaked out. Please help....thanks""

Young driver insurance?

what is the best car insurance for young drivers

How much would insurance cost for a VW Polo 1.9 ...?

My sister just asked me how much insurance would be for a 17 year old new driver in a VW Polo 1.9 I don't want to go signing up to insurance companies so they can ring me every day trying to sell me rubbish so I'm wondering if anyone just happens to know. Thanks in advance.

Where can i get the cheapest car insurance?

i live in virginia

Now that health insurance companies must give a rebate to companies for group plans?

that don't completely utilize coverage, according to an obscure audit formula, will those insured under the group plan feel guilty if they have to use it and it affects everyone in the plan's annual rebate check? And how will insurance companies make up for this loss?""

When buying life insurance what is the best affordable option?

I am 37 with 2 kids I currently have term life on me for 250,000.00 and 100,000.00 on each of the kids. Now there are tons of different life insurances out here is one really better than the other? I currently have it thru met life does it really matter?""

Can an insurance quote lower you credit score?

I am looking to buy a car soon ... but I am a new driver and I know my insurance will be hight ... I am planning to go insurance company to insurance company to get quotes. Does that lower my credit score?

I got car insurance and it allows me to drive other peoples cars on my insurance?

if i were to buy another car, 2nd car will i be able to drive that without registering to any insruance company? i wont be selling my 1st car, it will still have the insruance, and the insruance it has allows me to drive other cars, but im not sure if the other cars also need insurance from a company""

Will my parents car insurance go up if they co sign for me?

I have my own car and need car insurance but I need my parents to co sign for me. I'm getting a different insurance company from what my parents have on a different everything. Will them co signing for my insurance affect their insurance with anything? Like will their insurance go up because they co sign for me? Or if I get a ticket or in a wreck will it raise their insurance costs? We live in the USA.

Car Insurance Down Payment?

I just purchased a car insurance plan and there was a down payment necessary which was about double the plans monthly cost, it totaled about 270 total and the plan is 130 a month. I was wondering if the down payment I paid would go toward next months payment as well so I wouldn't have to pay for that month or would i eventually get my down payment back? Thanks in advance.""

About how much is high point auto insurance a month?

Well, I just recently got my license and I wanted to buy a car, but my mom said that it's a bad idea and one of the reasons is because of how expensive insurance is. My friend told me her insurance- high point- is only 60 dollars a month. I'm not sure if that's true, because that sounds really really cheap. Does anyone have this or know approximately how much this auto insurance would be a month?""

Why is car insurance so high?

the guy who made young drivers insurance so High should be dragged out in public and shot in front of his family!

Car insurance questions!?!!? HELP! accident!?

Hey, three weeks ago, I got into a car accident and rear ended someone in the front with suv. I had a honda, and the insurance company declared it totaled and they are going to pay around 9k for the car. Since it was rear-end accident, insurance company held me for 100% at fault. The suv had broken/dented bumper and lower part of trunk lid dented (No broken lights or anything). I would say around few thousand dollars worth of damage. There were 3 people in the car and at the time they said they are all ok, and drove off. No police report was filed. When I called at night to get one of the guy's birthday, he said all three went to emergency, and had whiplash pain in neck area (which is understandable from rear-end accident). I had full coverage so I know my insurance comp. would pay their bills. The thing I am scared about is what if they sue me? I am from low-class family and a full time student on loans so I have no money or even a job. If they do, how much can they sue me for?""

Any 1 want life insurance or mediclaim?

v r giving best service with lower price...

Can 16 year old get public liability insurance?

Im 16 and hoping to get some public liability insurance as I'm planning to be working in beauty (waxing,nails,ect) with my cousin.""

How much was your auto insurance at 18 year olds?

Roommate Fell Off My Roof Will Homeowner Insurance Pay?

I asked roommate to put waterproof plastic on roof over-hang. He fell off roof and broke collar bone. We took him to ER. When he came home he needed more care then we could give him. He went to his cousins assisted-living hospital. He has Medicare and Medi-Cal, California. Will my homeowners insurance cover his unpaid bills? Can he sue for pain and suffering? Will insurance cancel my policy? He was been roommate for 3 years.""

Whats the best car insurance?

I am an at risk drive at age 19 driving a 2005 toyota sequoia that hasn't been paid off yet i have one at fault accident ( i hit a car in a parking lot with nobody in it) and i have two speeding tickets now i need full coverage because im still making payments but I would like to know what to go with because so far all my quotes are really expensive! please help me out guys i cant afford 300 dollar car insurance!

What are the books that insurance companies use?

What are books that are full of the variations of ways that people have died, that insurance companies use to produce statistics called or labelled as genre.""

How much should I charge for tutoring?

I'm a senior in high school with over a 4.0 weighted average, and I'm thinking about doing some tutoring work for money, since no local businesses are hiring and I need to start paying car insurance soon, since I'll be driving. I'm wondering what to charge per session, and how long a session should last. I've figured out that I can tutor any subject for levels K-8, along with HS level Biology and Chemistry. Alternatively, for levels K-6, I'm willing to offer general homework help. I have some experience - I tutored someone who was failing two to four hours per week last year in HS Chemistry, and she ended up passing the course, including her NYS Regents Exam, which many people failed. From what I've seen, tutors around here make anywhere from $10 to $40, at my level of education. Is $10-15 unreasonable for a general homework help session? How does $20 sound for levels 7&8 math, or HS subjects? Is this too much? Too little? Could I make it work?""

Does my teenager need to be added to my insurance policy BEFORE he receives his driver's license?

Three of my friends didn't add their kids until they actually had their licenses, and the driving school said that technically they are covered by the parent's insurance while driving with just a permit. When I called AAA, they said I needed to add him. If I don't have to add him to the policy until he's actually a licensed driver and save the enormous $$$ it'll cost, I'd prefer to wait.""

What are the penalties for driving someone else's car that does not have insurance?

Long story short, my friend was driving his friend's car when he crashed into someone. Not a big accident, but the car's owner had no car insurance. They have to go to court and they, including the police have do not know who was at fault. Anyone know what are the penalties of crashing someone else's car that doesn't have insurance? Would most of the blame be placed on the owner? This was in colorado, in case laws differ state from state.""

Car Insurance HELP......?

Well Im 19 yo. and I want to buy a car in England. But insurance is the main problem!!! I have International Driver License and Im looking cars like Crossfire, BMW M1 etc. but secondhand ones. Which insurance company will be the best for me??? Btw Im university student.""

What is the best life insurance for seniors?

age 53, will retire in 2010 - federal employee""

Can we also get free car insurance? Obamacare?

we are very poor,,, and quality for free health care with this new plan that tax payers are so nice to pay for,,, can tax payers also pay for my car insurance?""

Car Insurance, including APR?

How much would insurance cost me?

Hi im 16 and an about a week im going to get my car the honda s2000. my parents wanted me to look around for insurance under there name? you guys know any cheap insurance companys? and how much do u think it would cost me a month?

How much does insurance cost for a 21 year old male?

I wanna get a car soon and i want a 2006 Mitsubishi Lancer Evolution and i was just wondering if anybody knows an estimate on how much insurance would be. I will be making payments on the car if that helps

Insurance premium after an accident?

So I was in an accident last week. It was a minor fender bender and was my first accident in the 9 years of driving I've had. I got a ticket for careless driving from the cop and I only did a small dent in the other car's bumper. My car however took a decent amount of damage and is currently being fixed. They said it is going to cost $2050 to repair my car and $440 for the others persons but I just have to pay my $500 deductible. What I'm wondering is how much should I expect my insurance to go up from this? I currently pay around $900 a year and use progressive insurance.

What vehicles have the lowest insurance rates for teenage drivers.?

""Can someone advise car insurance, selling car?""

I am due to sell my car soon, which I will be advertising but obviously as I need to keep it on the road whilst advertising I need to insure it. I have received an annual quote from my usual insurance company however do not want to pay for a whole year as this would not make sense should I see the car in a couple of months etc. Would it be possible to pay monthly via my insurance company and reduce the added extras such as a hire car and legal expenses etc seeing as the car won't be in use? And does anyone know if I can cancel the policy straight away once the car is sold and I have confirmation I am no longer the registered keeper? I have never sold a car before so am a little in the dark so far as insurance goes on a car you are not really using. Thanks""

How good is military insurance(Tri-Care) for maternity care?

My husband is in the military. I've never used the insurance, but I will need it now that I'm 6.5 weeks pregnant. How's the coverage?""

Should I be put on my moms car insurance?

should I be put under my mothers insurance, or should i take care of my car insurance my self? Im 18""

How much can i spend on a car with the money i make?

im 17 years old and i have a job that pays $8.30 an hour and i work about 16 hrs per week, and i also tutor afterschool, for $20 dollars an hour, for 6 hours, so i make about $240 a week, and im planning to get a car, but i dont know what car i could afford. how much money can i spend in a car if i have monthly car payments?, oh yea plus insurance. thanks""

Car insurance comparison websites - aaaaaaarrggghhh!!!?

why so many adverts for these price comparison websites. sonn we will have a comparison website, for comparison websites. is this just me or does this piss everyone off in a big way""

Who knows a cheap health insurances?

Please does anyone know of a better and affordable health insurances, I am expecting so I really need to have insurance otherwise I can't afford the bills.""

How much will car insurance pay for my accident?

I live in Logan, Utah and I was stopped at a red light when a car rear ended me going about 35 to 40 mph. I got whiplash and my neck, back and shoulder's have been hurting since. I also have headache's. The insurance company that will be paying for my injuries is allstate and they said they won't pay for excessive bills. How can I tell which bills they will count as reasonable and which bills aren't. I don't want to end up paying for anything, but I need to go see someone. Will they pay for chiropractors? massages? going to the doctor? I just don't know. I am also wondering how much money they will pay me once I settle. I'm not able to go to work because I'm a hairstylist and I can't hold my arm's up very long. I already tried to go to work, but I just couldn't do it so i came home early. Please Help! This is my first accident and I don't know what to do""

What level of car insurance should I get?

The difference in my car insurance quote from the bare minimum ($356.50) to second or third in each category ($1,422.90) is over a thousand dollars. This is for a 6-month quote. I'm a very safe driver and have never been in an accident that is my fault. Someone rear-ended me once but there was only damage to his car. Should I risk going with bare minimum coverage? What do other people out there do? What level of insurance do you guys have?""

Car Insurance question?

I got a ticket 3 years ago. I just got one recently around February. My car insurance will get renewed around August. When they renew my insurance and they estimate the new amount for my car insurance, will they find out about my recent ticket? I know the past one from 3 years ago will get dropped off since car insurance companies dont count tickets from 3 years ago, but will the one that I had from this year get counted into the new estimate this year?""

Im in the UK - how much more will I pay on car insurance?

I took out a 945 insurance on my VW golf with tesco. I claimed one 500 for a scrape against the wall of my drive. How much do you think the insurance will be on renewal ? Jon

How much will my car insurance be when I get this car?

well i am 19 years old and I am finna purchase a 2003 blue mustang convertable?

On an estimate how much does car insurance cost?

What Cheap car insurance do you use?

What car insurance do you use?

Who has the cheapest car insurance?

...

How much will my car insurance cost me?

I am 18 years old, and live in Northern BC. I have had my N license for just over a year, I have had NO accidents or tickets. I have a 1995 Honda Civic 4 Door. I am a very safe driver and I have been unlucky to find a good quote. Do you think it would be around $100/month?""

Difference between a deductible and co-insurance?

I am shopping for individual health insurance and I do not understand the difference between these terms. Also, if a plan has a $1000 deductible does that apply to the entire 12 month term of the plan or every single time I receive health care services? And what about co-insurance?""

Are there any groups you can join that offers group health insurance?

Or some insurance co that does not ask for a ten year history?

Did I get a good quote for my car insurance?

I am 28 years old and recently passed my driving test. My full UK driving license is 4 months old and I got car insurance with my uncle for 43 a month including 7 years no claim bonus, 506 a year. Is that a good deal?""

Getting health insurance?

I am a 38 yr old female amd my partner of 17 yrs is a 45 yr old male.my job does not provide health insurance and my partner is self employed.We live in washington state.A few yrs ago we applied for basic health insurance and they wanted my last income tax statement witch I do not have.We need insurance badly my partner has asthma and needs medicine and we both need physicals.Is there any insurance companies that will give health insurance without wanting income tax returns.or proof of income.We need a health insurance provider who will give insurance like getting car insurance just pay a monthly fee no questions asked.Is there health insurance companies like that.

Am I covered under my parents car insurance?

I got my License yesterday and I want to drive my parents car, am I covered by their car insurance? I am 16 Years old.....""

My GF just renewed her car insurance and has to pay an extra 55 a year for 3 years because...?

In June last year some halfwit drove into the back of her while she was stationary at a junction, no claim was made as an accident management firm was used to claim the money back from the halfwit, it was a no fault accident on the GF's part, she also had full no claims bonus at the time. So will every company charge her this premium or is it just her insurance company? This is so unfair!""

Car Insurance, including APR?

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/how-much-can-i-offer-pay-claimant-car-insurance-claim-sharie-noena"

0 notes

endlessarchite · 7 years

Text

5-Ingredient Spicy Chicken Quesadillas

My lighting was too yellow, I didn’t feel like setting up the tripod, and the daylight was already spent. Whatever, though. Lazy meal, lazy photography.

In all honesty though, I’m not a food photographer — at least, not yet — and am just getting started with sharing some of my own recipes here on the UDH. I gave it a lot of thought considering how focused I’ve been on remodeling, but after more than 7 years of talking mainly about DIY and dirt and finally having a kitchen to cook in, suddenly talking about something meant to actually look appetizing is… well, kind of fun.

And that’s how I decided that the very first thing I’d share with all of you guys would be something almost laughable to call a “recipe” — my very easy, not-at-all-healthy-for-you, addictively-face-stuffing quesadillas. I first made this when I was craving Mexican food like no other during a semester-long study abroad in college. Italy is awesome and has amazing food, but when you’ve grown up in the southern US, food cravings are serious business. I needed something to at least satisfy whatever part of my stomach that kept reminding me that spaghetti sauce tastes nothing like salsa. I had only the few ingredients I could find at the little Italian grocer ten blocks away (so basically, not the best place to find tortillas and queso), and what came out of it was a meal I still eat to this day. And that every boyfriend I’ve ever cooked for has asked me to make a number of times, so that at least tells me that it’s not just me that really likes it.

Some links are inserted into this post that help financially support this site if you purchase them from my recommendations. It doesn’t impact your purchase price (but legally I still gotta tell ya and it’s just the right thing to do), so it’s basically win-win. THANK YOU for supporting the UDH!

In years past, my diet has consisted of quick meals that I could heat up before going back to whatever project causing me to drip more sweat off my forehead (P.S., the new fire pit I built this weekend is coming your way soon!). In that time, I’ve learned a small handful of easy meals that are probably great for more than just project fuel (easy for kids, easy for parties, etc.). This will also be a fun learning experience for me as I get a chance to learn what food photography is all about (note to self: create studio area in garage). Still though… I probably got the best shot I ever could have, thanks to a certain curious redhead at the other end of the dining room table:

Hahahahahhahahaha… oh, Charlie.

The Ultimate Lazy-Gal Meal

In all seriousness, these are pretty darn good quesadillas. They’re easy to make, even when you’re really tired, and can even do some of it as a make-ahead meal (you can make the chicken ahead of time and then whip out the tortillas and cheese as needed, and the tortillas come out all warm and crispy). I will often make a large batch and either freeze or chill the leftover chicken for a later date. But the best part is that it’s exactly perfectly spicy and buttery and filling, which is exactly what I want in my comfort food. And when you’re entertaining, you can make a whole bunch of these really fast and cut them up into small wedges as finger food. It’s a crowd-pleaser and goes great with a beer. I plan on making them a lot this football season.

It’s also an incredibly versatile recipe since it needs so few ingredients. I prefer to eat it as a working-and-eating dinner: with one hand, while working on the computer (or with a beer in the other). Or when I feel like pigging out but also don’t feel like dirtying a lot of dishes.

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5-Ingredient Spicy Chicken Quesadillas

These spicy chicken quesadillas are SO easy!! And kind of addictively spicy. But if heat isn’t your thing, you can still customize these for kids, tailgate parties, or just bachelorette-style over the sink. <3

Author: Sarah

Ingredients

soft taco flour tortillas (I prefer these)

chunky salsa (I prefer Tostitos – Medium heat)

pepper jack cheese (I prefer Sargento, and yes I’ve used pre-sliced when I’m feeling extra lazy)

boneless chicken breasts

butter or cooking spray for the griddle pan

Instructions

Cut chicken breasts into medium-sized chunks and place in skillet/frying pan over medium heat. Cover with salsa and let it cook a little until the chicken becomes shreddable (I use forks).

Once chicken is fully cooked, move pan aside to a cold burner on the stove (or if saving for later, let cool and store in sealed plastic container and refrigerate).

Add griddle pan over medium heat. Prepare each quesadilla by buttering the outside of each tortilla and filling with chicken and cheese. Cook on both sides until the tortilla is golden brown.

Notes

It may sound counterproductive, but I like to pre-butter the quesadillas before putting them on the griddle pan instead of in the pan itself. This gives me a buttery bite every time, but to keep it mess-free, I butter the tortilla, flip it over against another, and fill it with ingredients before placing it on the pan.

Use a wide spatula for easier flipping.

For less heat, use mild salsa and/or monterey jack cheese with no peppers.

Chunky salsa is better (IMO) than blended… I like the tomatoes and peppers in each bite.

You can make these an easy dinner for kids by scaling down the size (use a smaller tortilla) and heat of the ingredients used (I love medium heat salsa, while you can use mild and regular monterey jack instead of pepper jack cheese, or you can use hot salsa to dial up the heat… dealer’s choice!). If you’re a cheddar fan, load up the quesadilla with some shredded cheddar (ick). A certain bearded dude likes cheddar and hot sauce on everything, so I’m forced to add a little variety to the original these days (obviously, he can’t be trusted with taste like this, but it’s still easy and quick).

Enjoy!

The post 5-Ingredient Spicy Chicken Quesadillas appeared first on The Ugly Duckling House.

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toclaireify · 7 years

Text

OneHunna Truths

1. I’m a terrible dancer.

2. While I was in Europe, I explored every old church that I could. Not for religious purposes. Mostly because I found such peace and beauty within them.

3. I’m not a nice person before my morning coffee.

4. I can’t sit normally. Usually I have to be curled up in a ball or have one leg tucked under the other.

5. I always crave fruit and sushi when I’m hungover.

6. I’m probably the most easily scared person on the face of the planet.

7. Don’t look for validation in other people.

8. Graduating scared me shitless. I always had a plan or next step, and for the first time in my life, I was just taking it one step at a time.

9. I wish I could be a pseudo-adult forever.

10. Whenever I get really drunk, I snore really loud.

11. I only have tolerance for very few people.

12. The last episode of Dawson’s Creek is the only thing that can make me cry.

13. I hate wearing shoes, but I love their aesthetic

14. I’m so lucky to have a friend like Daniel. He writes me motivational emails and makes the best playlists.

15. I constantly crave Panera salads.

16. Life is too short to drink shitty wine.

17. I fell in love with an Oxford boy in England.

18. I’m terrified that I peaked at 21.

19. I got finessed into buying an up-and-coming rapper $200 worth of polo while I was blacked out.

20. I get in fights with homeless people and overly aggressive males.

21. I’ve seen Matt Nathanson live 6 times, and met him three times. You could say he’s my favorite human being on the planet.

22. Post graduate depression is a very real thing.

23. I never text first.

24. Lots of people know me as a social butterfly, but in all actuality, I am a huge socially awkward introvert.

25. This past year has definitely been one of self-discovery and new experiences.

26. I don’t think I’ll experience any better years than the ones I spent in my undergrad at WVU.

27. The funny thing is, I was never supposed to end up there, yet that is the place where I became the person I believe I was meant to be.

28. I’ve worked at Gap for five years, holy shit.

29. I’m obsessed with getting my nails done.

30. I traveled to a foreign country for two weeks, didn’t tell my parents, and got away with it.

31. I’m still on a journey of discovering my own self-worth.

32. This dude who interned with me last semester tried to make out with me while I was blacked out eating a hotdog at Joe’s.

33. Fuck the Domain.

34. I’ve been trying to be more creative like painting and writing and shit. It’s not going very well so far.

35. Boys have cooties.

36. Stephanie Rochelle is the North West to my Penelope Disick.

37. Living in 813 has been my favorite living situation thus far.

38. My heart cannot fully express how much I adore my Evans Street boys.

39. Home would suck without Sarah and Coop.

40. I’ve done way more drugs than I probably should have.

41. I lost my phone in a club in London, and it was one of the most traumatic moments of my life.

42. Friends who have good taste in music are friends for life.

43. I failed all my classes while studying abroad because I would skip all the time to travel instead.

44. Not a day goes by that I don’t miss living in England. I miss all my friends so much.

45. I enjoy spelling out obscene messages on diy party banners.

46. Listen to Bodega Boys.

47. One of the biggest compliments you can pay me is saying you want to drink with me, and trust me, I get that a lot.

48. Mix orange juice with a 40oz. You won’t regret it.

49. Don’t worry, I’m still obsessed with wine.

50. Every time I go to Bent Willy’s, I black out.

51. Black Lives Matter.

52. Sometimes you just gotta dance it out to ‘I Wanna Dance’ by Whitney Houston.

53. I low-key wanna be best friends with Schoolboy Q’s cousin because all he does is drive around downtown LA and drink lean.

54. Lil B follows me on twitter.

55. Gin and tonic has become my drink of choice.

56. My parents illegally opened up my mail and discovered I had $5,500 worth of credit card debt.

57. I left Joe Mama’s to go hook up with a dude, and then came back to the bar an hour later.

58. One of the best talents I possess is being able to roll up a yoga mat perfectly symmetrical.

59. I fall in love with strangers daily.

60. I downloaded tinder for two weeks, but got rid of it because it was just way too much.

61. I wish I had enough money to go where I want to go and do the things I want to do.

62. I’m convinced that I am my biggest obstacle in life. No matter how much I want to achieve my goals, I often find that the only thing holding me back is myself and my fear.

63. My biggest guilty pleasure is BuzzFeed. Send me a quiz so I know it’s real.

64. Children are the strangest creatures on the planet. I can’t believe I ever was one.

65. I obsess over other people’s animals because I no longer have any of my own.

66. I just really fucking love food.

67. I’ll always wonder why I was never good enough.

68. Sometimes I wonder if Michael and Suzanne are aware that they gave birth to the baddest bitch in West Virginia.

69. I love reading my horoscope, no matter how corny they are.

70. Some days I feel like I would never be happy not being single. Other days, I kind just wanna get cuffed.

71. When, I eat pepperoni pizza, I pick all the pepperoni off first and eat it, then I eat the actual pizza.

72. I low-key think I have anxiety and depression, but I guess I’ve managed it pretty well on my own so far?

73. I feel like I can definitely feel energies around me. Like positive and negative energies. Uneasiness. Stuff like that.

74. I honestly don’t think I’ll ever have as good a group of friends than I have right now.

75. I crave financial independence. But it’s a lot harder than I ever thought it would be.

76. They say I’m the queen of Morgantown, and they’re not wrong.

77. More than anything, I just don’t want to lose my spark.

78. I love hanging out in libraries.

79. I’m not comfortable with staying in the same place for very long. I’m always looking forward to being anywhere different than where I am at any given time.

80. Shameless is probably the best show I’ve watched in a really long time.

81. I own an obscene amount of wine glasses, and none of them match.

82. Tumblr is my favorite form of social media. I don’t ever post anything, but I’ll spend hours reblogging stuff.

83. I only recently learned how to contour and do my brows. I love doing my makeup, but I suck at it.

84. Also, I fucking hate doing my hair. Mostly because I suck at that too.

85. I think my father is low-key ashamed of me because I’m anti everything he believes in.

86. And Suzanne is afraid to talk about politics in front of me because she’ll know I’ll come in with wild hot takes that make her uncomfortable.

87. So clearly I’m the only liberal in my family.

88. Don’t ever get a credit card. Or four. They will ruin your life.

89. But fuck capitalism, amiright?

90. I’m not good at dealing with confrontation.

91. The only channel on TV that’s worth watching is Viceland.

92. I honestly love being in school. It gives me a ton of structure, and I just really like to learn.

93. I don’t believe that “everything happens for a reason” bullshit.

94. I was meant to be a wine mom in another life.

95. “IDK I’m just out here” has basically been my life for the past six months.

96. At the end of the day we all just want to matter.

97. I never feel like I get enough sleep.

98. Student loans are the new housing market bubble.

99. I took me A LOT longer than what I wanted to write this. I started in August of 2016 and just now ended in February 2017, but I think you can definitely see the progression of my thoughts over those months.

100. Every year, these never get old. But sometimes it’s hard for me to come up with stuff. Mostly because it’s hard for me to be honest to myself. But if anything, you should always tell the truth, to the people you value most in life and yourself.

#one hundred truths #mine

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batterymonster2021 · 5 years

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Why College Is So Expensive In America

New Post has been published on https://hititem.kr/why-college-is-so-expensive-in-america-2/

Why College Is So Expensive In America

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airoasis · 5 years

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Why College Is So Expensive In America

New Post has been published on https://hititem.kr/why-college-is-so-expensive-in-america-2/

Why College Is So Expensive In America

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endlessarchite · 7 years

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5-Ingredient Spicy Chicken Quesadillas

My lighting was too yellow, I didn’t feel like setting up the tripod, and the daylight was already spent. Whatever, though. Lazy meal, lazy photography.

Hahahahahhahahaha… oh, Charlie.

The Ultimate Lazy-Gal Meal

5-Ingredient Spicy Chicken Quesadillas

Author: Sarah

Ingredients

soft taco flour tortillas (I prefer these)

chunky salsa (I prefer Tostitos – Medium heat)

pepper jack cheese (I prefer Sargento, and yes I’ve used pre-sliced when I’m feeling extra lazy)

boneless chicken breasts

butter or cooking spray for the griddle pan

Instructions

Cut chicken breasts into medium-sized chunks and place in skillet/frying pan over medium heat. Cover with salsa and let it cook a little until the chicken becomes shreddable (I use forks).

Once chicken is fully cooked, move pan aside to a cold burner on the stove (or if saving for later, let cool and store in sealed plastic container and refrigerate).

Add griddle pan over medium heat. Prepare each quesadilla by buttering the outside of each tortilla and filling with chicken and cheese. Cook on both sides until the tortilla is golden brown.

Notes

Use a wide spatula for easier flipping.

For less heat, use mild salsa and/or monterey jack cheese with no peppers.

Chunky salsa is better (IMO) than blended… I like the tomatoes and peppers in each bite.

Enjoy!

The post 5-Ingredient Spicy Chicken Quesadillas appeared first on The Ugly Duckling House.

Website // Subscribe // Advertise // Twitter // Facebook // Google+

5-Ingredient Spicy Chicken Quesadillas published first on http://ift.tt/2qxZz2j

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endlessarchite · 7 years

Text

5-Ingredient Spicy Chicken Quesadillas

My lighting was too yellow, I didn’t feel like setting up the tripod, and the daylight was already spent. Whatever, though. Lazy meal, lazy photography.

Hahahahahhahahaha… oh, Charlie.

The Ultimate Lazy-Gal Meal

5-Ingredient Spicy Chicken Quesadillas

Author: Sarah

Ingredients

soft taco flour tortillas (I prefer these)

chunky salsa (I prefer Tostitos – Medium heat)

pepper jack cheese (I prefer Sargento, and yes I’ve used pre-sliced when I’m feeling extra lazy)

boneless chicken breasts

butter or cooking spray for the griddle pan

Instructions

Cut chicken breasts into medium-sized chunks and place in skillet/frying pan over medium heat. Cover with salsa and let it cook a little until the chicken becomes shreddable (I use forks).

Once chicken is fully cooked, move pan aside to a cold burner on the stove (or if saving for later, let cool and store in sealed plastic container and refrigerate).

Add griddle pan over medium heat. Prepare each quesadilla by buttering the outside of each tortilla and filling with chicken and cheese. Cook on both sides until the tortilla is golden brown.

Notes

Use a wide spatula for easier flipping.

For less heat, use mild salsa and/or monterey jack cheese with no peppers.

Chunky salsa is better (IMO) than blended… I like the tomatoes and peppers in each bite.

Enjoy!

The post 5-Ingredient Spicy Chicken Quesadillas appeared first on The Ugly Duckling House.

Website // Subscribe // Advertise // Twitter // Facebook // Google+

5-Ingredient Spicy Chicken Quesadillas published first on http://ift.tt/2qxZz2j

0 notes

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