#and then NOT adapt jason todd and how horribly it all came crashing down

[navree]

robert pattinson angling for a death in the family adaptation????? he really is the only batman for me

[bluboothalassophile]

Crash Course!

@chromium7sky & @deep-in-mind67 a tremendous Thank You for allowing me to borrow Cas ad Malik for some mayhem and destruction! They are terrific and you are both lovely and I hope you enjoy!

~~~*~*~*~~~

Damian al Ghul was a busy man, by nature, he wasn’t one to idly sit about, and he did have operations to run, companies to manage, people to train, a wife to love, and a son to raise. Life was never simple, and lately, Malik had been up to something.

Damian didn’t want to press his son, he did not want to be that parent, he had hopes that Malik would come to him when he was ready, but he was seriously concerned for his son. Malik may be the most mature, levelheaded sixteen year old that Damian had ever encountered. But his son was a perfect resurrection of the Lazarus Pit and a demon and he knew, after watching Todd, his mother, grandfather all struggle with the Pit, that it wouldn’t be this simple, despite Malik being a very good young boy. The sixteen-year-old was a sixteen year old boy in a twenty something year old body, and a demon, and Damian worried. He was a father, he worried.

And lately Malik had gotten very reclusive and very secretive, and he was very worried for his son, but he did not want to be an overbearing parent; he had seen how poorly that turned out. He just hoped that Malik would trust him enough to come to him when things got really bad for him. Damian hoped to any and every deity that Malik knew that Damian was in his corner no matter what.

~~~*~*~*~~~

Malik didn’t think it could be too difficult to do what Casmir was asking, it was not like driving was rocket science, and he had learnt when he was twelve; he was genuinely surprised Cas did not know how to drive. But apparently an incident with Raynor had had their father saying no to any and all teachings for driving until they were legal. Plus, like him, Cas portalled everywhere, but still, Malik could see the practicality in the ability to drive.

And since Casmir’s parents were out on a Justice League mission, all the Batlings were under Nos’ care and Malik didn’t think the feline would care if he taught Cas to drive. Besides, this version of his parents were why more… gentle, he didn’t think they’d get into any serious trouble if they were caught.

“Okay, I’m set,” Cas grinned as they sat in one of the zillions of cars the Waynes always seemed to own. Malik had talked Cas out of the Lamborghini, instead they had opted for the Aston Martin; it was the one that looked like it belonged in those bond films, and he rather liked it.

Malik had walked Cas through the check list for safe driving. They slowly drove to the Batcave where there was a huge track set up for some reason. Malik would admit he was impressed with this version of his father for having adapted a serious training regime here in the Batcave, back home most his training was in Nanda Parbat with his family. Until running into the Batlings he hadn’t really seen much of anything outside the compound, though he did dimension hop from time to time when his mother and father were not around.

“Break, gas, and watch your speed, we shouldn’t go super fast,” he instructed as they got to the track.

“Beak, gas, seatbelt,” Cas muttered as they started going. Suddenly there was a blast of light and it felt like Cas hit the gas too hard as they were both thrown back in their seats.

“CAS!” he shouted and there was a blast of light as a blackhole opened.

“MALIK!” Cas screeched.

They both screamed as they were dimension hopping too quickly to even slow down.

~~~*~*~*~~~

Cas would admit, admittedly, this was not his brightest idea, but Malik hadn’t said no!

For a hot minute Cas was not the oldest and therefore, so not responsible!

Plausible deniability was going to be great. Honestly, Cas had never had this! But he could see from the look of the garage they had crashed into again that they were so dead, so very, very dead. If he and Malik survived this, Lorcan and Griffith were dead when he got home!

It took one look at an unamused Jason Todd for Cas to know exactly which universe they had crashed into, as this was obviously the one with the Jason Todd who had taught Raynor to drive!

“Is that Todd?” Malik asked warily.

“Not either of ours,” Cas grimaced and smiled. Jason stood there staring blandly back with a mug of steaming coffee, the mug was a minion’s mug; and Cas was certain it was the one Ingo had gotten this Jay. This Jason was different from either his or Malik’s, with a J seared into his cheek to highlight the immediate difference.

“Hey Jay,” he called as he rolled down the window.

“Casmir,” Jason remarked. “I don’t know which one is beside you,” he stated.

“This is Malik, he’s from another, another dimension,” Cas explained.

“Mmm,” Jason hummed. “Raven!” he barked.

“What!?” she appeared.

“Control your other dimensional children!” Jason demanded.

“Mom!?” Malik gaped. Cas smiled meekly as she went to stand beside Jason, she was tiny still, her hair was now to her waist, long, thick, inky black, her eyes were now distinctly violet and her sharp features were schooled in indifference as she arched a delicate brow at both of them while sipping her tea.

“Oh, that is not a good look,” Malik muttered while paling.

“We’re so very dead,” Cas whispered as he sunk in his seat.

“You want to tell me what’s happening here Cas?” Raven asked idly as she appeared in their back seat having both the boys jolting as they twisted around.

“M-mom!?” Cas and Malik yelped.

“Not quite,” she chuckled humorlessly. “Now why are you crashing through the garage?”

“Malik agreed to teach me to drive,” Cas informed her.

“Mmm, and I’m guessing you’re Malik?”

“Yes,” he answered.

“Nice to meet you, did the Batlings abduct another child I wasn’t aware of?” Rae asked blandly as she examined Malik.

“Um…” Cas looked at Malik and back at Rae who was sipping her tea.

“Not quite,” Malik answered. “I found the Batlings, I’m from another dimension,” he explained.

“Mmm, well, clean up and we’ll get breakfast then send you home. If you think to dimension hop, I’ll remind you I know where you live Cas,” Raven stated as she was enveloped by shadows and reappeared beside Jason.

“You know her?”

“Yeah, Ingo found her when we were babies, she’s family now,” Cas muttered.

“She does know she’s not the boss of us, right?” Malik asked.

“I am so not getting on that version of mom’s bad side!” Cas stated as he got out of the car.

“Why would we get on her bad side!?” Malik asked.

“Trust me, we don’t want to end up there,” Cas stated. “And this Jay can outcook Alfred!”

~~~*~*~*~~~

Raven was barely awake, and Jason wasn’t much better than she was at this point. Though Jay was prepping breakfast. It was a perfectly peaceful morning for her and Jason, none of Jay’s relatives were here for a change which had made life peaceful. Her own family was out of town as well. Rae had been texting Dean, Cas, Sam and Jack in the family group chat, and she had also had a call from Elijah to wish her a happy birthday. Her moms’ had called her from their European tour; which was apparently something Harley had always wanted to do, but they could never leave Gotham long enough to actually do it; but Rae was having breakfast with them tomorrow when she portalled over so she could meet up with Donna and Roy. Donna and Roy had plans for her tomorrow for a late Birthday dinner; it wasn’t easy to get time with the Queen of Themyscira. Vic had called her from deep space even, he was still helping the Lanterns. Kyle, Artemis, and Eddie were going to have lunch with her and Jason. Constantine was having dinner with her, Luci, Alice, Jack, Mary-Beth, Billy, and Jess tonight. But until her lunch, she had all the time in the world with Jason, and only Jason, which was something rare.

At least it was just her and Jason until there was a horrible crash in the garage.

Now though, after having the children clean up the garage, she found herself sitting at the island across from two sheepish looking boys. Cas was tall, gangly, and lean, his black hair was sticking up in odd directions, and his violet eyes were down cast. The other boy, Malik was huge, tall, thick and she sensed the Lazarus Pit in him. His eyes had the tell-tale green ring pulsing in them around the violet irises. He also looked a lot like Damian, high cheek bones, lean face, sharp nose, firmly set lips pulled in a grim line as he assessed her, his black hair was a bit shaggy.

“You want to tell me how you ended up in this dimension, again, Cas?” Raven asked as she set out two teas, she saw the other boy’s surprise as he cautiously came forward with Cas for tea.

“It’s Ingo’s fault.”

“Sure,” Raven waved off as she accepted the waffles from Jason. Jason served up two heaps of waffles for the boys as he pulled a cigarette.

“No smoking,” she said as she plucked the cigarette from his lips.

“Rae!”

“No! No smoking, you promised you were quitting, and I’m ensuring it. You’re Malik?” Raven turned her attention on the other boy who was cautiously cutting into the waffles with pristine manners, he was obviously Damian’s kid she thought.

“Yes,” he answered warily.

“And you’re from a different dimension?” Raven asked as she ate her own waffles, Jason finally sat and stole her syrup. “Hey!”

“You took my smokes!” he retorted.

“They’ll kill you young.”

“Jokes on you, I’m living to a hundred and two and then dying like the city of Detroit!” he sniped as he drowned his waffles in syrup.

“One of these days the Pit’s not going to save you from yourself,” she muttered as she swiped the syrup from him before he could have a sugar high. Jason rolled his eyes.

“Yes, I am from a different dimension,” Malik replied tentatively, clearly still absorbing the situation.

~~~*~*~*~~~

Malik was very confused. He’d been to a lot of different dimensions, which was how he had met the Batlings, and unwittingly befriended them, and been pulled into their antics. When he had agreed to teach Casmir to drive, he had not expected to be hit by a spell from Lorcan and Griffith, and somehow not controlling his own dimension hopping, which had been very unnerving. Then he had crashed into an unknown garage, which had not looked anything like the Batcave where he and Cas had been driving, to see a man who was clearly Todd but not his or the Batlings’ Todd.

This Jason stood there, lifted a scarred brow, his cheek had a J seared into it, and there were green pulses in his eyes, similar to Malik’s own. It was a mark of the Pit, and it was unnerving to see it reflected in his uncle’s eyes.

Then this Raven, his mom, had appeared, she stood beside Todd, and for the first time ever he truly noted how small his mom was. The Batlings’ Raven was lithe, delicate, his own mom had been small but not delicate, this Raven was small, petite, and almost delicate, yet her presence; like the other Raven’s he knew, was commanding. She was unnerving as well with how she had appeared, disappeared, and reappeared, he couldn’t sense her movement which was actually terrifying to him.

Now he was seated, in a warehouse, in a kitchen, before a plate of massive waffles, which were utterly divine in flavor, watching this version of his mother poke and prod this version of Todd and he was confused.

“I see, and in your universe, would your parents permit you to teach driving to a fifteen year old?” Raven asked dryly, turning her attention on him. It was unnerving how she had the mom look mastered and he felt this immense guilt about having agreed to just teaching Cas to drive.

“It’s not our fault we dimension hopped!” Cas protested.

“Sure, it’s not,” Todd muttered which had Malik glaring at this version of his uncle.

“It’s not!”

“Mmm, and how the hell did you get here?” Todd asked dryly.

“We were hit with a spell from Lorcan and Griffith,” Cas stated.

“We had no control of our dimension hopping,” Malik stated firmly. He was a bit annoyed with this version of his uncle; it was a bit annoying to have Todd of all people looking at them like they were reckless idiots. It wasn’t like they had intentionally dimension hopped!

“Mmm, should we be expecting the colony?” Todd asked dryly and Malik glared at his uncle.

“Um… no, I don’t think so,” Cas said.

“Good, little bird,” Todd turned to her. “Think you could get them home?”

“Not until I finish breakfast.”

“Obviously,” Todd snorted.

Malik did agree with Cas about this Todd’s cooking, it was very excellent! “Where’s father?” he asked as he continued cutting the waffles.

“The gremlin is at Berkley with his girlfriend,” Todd answered, and Malik’s head snapped up at that information as he glanced at this version of his mother then to Cas.

“Um… our parents are together in this universe,” Cas said.

“I do not understand,” Malik stated. His parents love transcended all boundaries he had encountered. Almost all the multiverses he had visited he had encountered his parents, together, they belonged together. “If mother is not with father…” he started.

“Your father is dating Irey West, and Jon Kent, depending on the day of the week and time of the month,” Todd chuckled as Raven whacked Todd up the back side of the head.

“In this universe, and in this universe, I do not date jailbait, which is exactly what he would’ve been if we had gotten together and it would have been disturbing, even for a demoness like myself.”

“So…”

“She’s with Todd,” Cass whispered.

“We’re not together!” Todd and Raven shouted as Cas. “Christ it’s like we’re twenty all over again.”

“Speak for yourself, it’s like I talked to Luci and Maze again!” Raven groaned.

“Just get the gremlins’ and other little birds’ spawns’ home and then we’re resume birthday plans,” Todd decided.

Malik blinked in utter confusion. This was a very strange universe. But these waffles were amazing, he wondered for the first time ever, if his uncle was as good of a cook as this version was.

“It’s your birthday?” he blinked at this version of his mother.

“Yes, it is,” she chuckled. “How do you like the waffles?”

“They’re delicious!” Malik admitted and stared longingly at his plate.

“Of course, he likes the fucking waffles, little bird, he’s your kid,” Todd stated as he nudged her side and started making more.

“This is the strangest universe I’ve been in,” he admitted to Cas.

“Yeah, me too, no one tried to stab, shoot or blow me up the first time I landed here!” Cas grinned in delight as Jason started serving them more waffles.

“You crash landed in the bouncy house,” Todd quipped.

“That was fun,” Cas chuckled.

“You dimension hop a lot,” he deduced from his brother.

“You have no idea,” Cas grinned.

“And I’m sure your parents will be lighted to know this in addition to you wrecking my garage,” Raven smiled.

“Do I at least get more waffles before my funeral?” Cas sighed.