#and we take a little dive into reaper lore

[theplumbobguide]

How to Make Your Game More Interesting:

you're so... ~interesting~

Intro: Hello all, Really quickly, I'd like to introduce myself. I have been playing the sims 2 since release when I was quite young, and still play 20 years later. In playing for 20 years, I have read the prima guides like they were the guides to my personal religion. I have deep dived into all the lore, and gone through more than a person who is not a dev should in this game. I've played too much. I've done too much. I also regularly peruse sims 2 subreddits, watch the sims 2 on youtube and generally seem to have made the sims 2 my life (writing this out, I'm feeling a little sad but... worth it). The main thing I see REGULARLY when reading comments and posts on reddit or the youtube comment section is that people generally don't know how to make their game interesting. Why? Well, it seems like generally people get very attached to their sims (same tbh) and don't want to cause chaos, or don't know how to cause chaos. My fun fact: I used to be just like you. Yes you, the person reading this is who is stuck in the loop of creating one perfect family after another and getting bored. I chronically made families of sims with the LTW of Fortune and Family who loved each other deeply, who had perfect A+ children, who succeeded in everything they did... sims who became stale. (how boring!) That was until I decided to use the skills I have learned through reading books, watching soap-opera-y shows, intense movies, and attempting to write my own novels to good use. This is where we come to part of what you came here for. Golden Rules: Rule #1. No good story has a main character who isn't flawed. Creating flawed sims is my main rule; if you had to leave this blog with one thing it's this: make flawed sims. Now, this doesn't mean all sims should be Romance sims or have a Romance secondary aspiration, but rather giving your sims "human qualities". Example: A sim with "anger issues", a sim who always chooses the wrong type of sims to date, a sim who is struggling with their sexuality, AN EVIL SIM. The list can go on. You can do this with your imagination and interactions in-game. You can also download wonderful mods like: Traits Project. This mod will help you create more dynamic sims without needing to think too much about it (OR thinking a lot about it, and adding the traits manually to really build your character). As you can see, there are tons of ways to create flawed sims. I ask you to be inspired by characters from the entertainment you enjoy consuming. You'd be surprised in how many little ways you can make a sim interesting and build a story around them. - A side note in this section: never underestimate a good "mid-life crisis". Quitting a job, gambling addiction, a new romantic interest, shopping addiction, arguing with a partner etc. The possibilities are endless. Rule #2. When in doubt, don't be afraid to take a sim out. No, I don't mean for a night out on the town... Here's the thing, sometimes your sim rolls boring wants regularly, seems to serve little to no purpose, and gives you the general feeling that there isn't much going on behind those pixelated eyes. Regardless of whether or not you like the sim you're thinking of in this moment, it's time to use them to drive the plot or create character development for your other playables. *Grim enters stage left* Never underestimate the storytelling tool that involves making your sim a ghost. Now, with that being said - we all enjoy occasionally letting the intrusive thoughts win when it comes to introducing your sim to the grim reaper; but we can't forget one of the main rules in storytelling plot drivers. You cannot off a character "just because". We must have reason, and this is where we can get really creative. Maybe your sim secretly really dislikes their so-called "perfect life". Maybe they just happen to hike in the desert, during the summer, with their needs really low... Maybe they fall asleep while making family dinner... MAYBE they take a little nightly swim while tired and seem to forget where that pesky pool ladder went.

There are tons of ways you can use these ideas and use it to drive your plot forward. Subjecting their loved ones to the reprocussions of their loss. It is here that I can't fail to mention that while random death can be important; as well as heart breaking. Here are a few ways I make random death possible in my game that I think are great: - Death By Childbirth - More Dangerous Fire - Real Sickness

The big thing I would like to reiterate, is to make sure that if it is not random, and completely your choice as the player, either send them off to the simulated great beyond for passion or pleasure. *Passion would be to move a plot forward, cause chaos, create a character arc for a sim or family, etc. *Pleasure would be just because it makes you happy to have more graves in your cemetary. you're a tad evil aren't you, you little minx. Rule #3. You Can't Always Get What You Want... but if you try sometimes, well, you just might find *you get what you need* Now, as you might have guessed: I am a semi-wants based player. You may be wondering "what that means?" What that means indeed, little friend. Semi-Wants Based Playstyle essentially boils down to: I try to achive almost everything my sim wants to do - but only if I like it for them. Also, sometimes your sim may not "want" something per se, but you've decided that you want to do it and don't want to wait for them to tell you they want to do it. This means, if my family sim decides that maybe they are more or just as attracted to their neighbour as they are their spouse and run a want to flirt with them... we may ruin a marriage or keep a deep dark secret, OR I will feel like it is too far out of left field for this particular sim and chose to ignore it completely. I go off ~vibes~ and suggest you try that too. Story time: I have the "Death by Childbirth" mod in my game. Two of my sims that we're romance sims lived together as a polyamourous couple sharing the sims they brought home. One day the female and male sims did an autonomous woohoo (thank you ACR), and fell pregnant wups. During that pregnancy, though, I noticed them be cute and close and... not have wants for other sims? I thought it was interesting and intended to maybe make them secondary family sims... until my female sim died during childbirth. Now, I could have gone two ways: 1. let the game be as it was and have the male sim be a single dad, or 2. use some cheats and get the resurrect o nomitron. The female sim who died was in the paranormal career, so I figured "why not! DO IT FOR THE PLOT." I resurrected her and decided that both sims underwent such a significant change that they may have also changed their outlooks on life, and changed their LTW. However, I always made it part of their story that while at first things would be good... at one point they would begin to feel like maybe family life wasn't really what they wanted or thought it would be. 3 children later (he wanted it), my female sim is going stir crazy; just wants to make friends and go to work and find the *more* that she knows is out there; my male sim is feeling very alone and like his wife isn't really there for him and his eye is beginning to wander... Who knows what will happen. What I'm trying to (and hopefully) get at here is this: The sims is YOUR game. Your sandbox. While it is fun to create chaos for chaos' sake, don't be afraid to do what YOU want. That's what makes the game enjoyable overall. So yes, maybe something bad happens to a sim, you have the complete ability to turn it around, as long as it what? Say it with me kids: "PrOgReSsEs ThE pLoT." That is what makes interesting gameplay/storytelling. you can really tell my creative writing teachers drilled something into my brain... but what was it? Rule #4. Jump Around! I know not everyone is a rotational player, nor is playing rotationally for everyone. I do, of course, think it's great (however you do it). I don't think it's a *must* to enjoy the game, though. I do stand on the hill that believes that some amount of "changing it up" is important. Once again, everyone is different, so find what you need or speaks to you in this section; but here are some things I do to make sure that I don't get burnt out.

Part 1. "Traditional" Rotational Gameplay: I play for the full EA/Maxis length season (5 days) with each family. You can do more or less. I also play in a pretty regular rotation that only gets changed based on circumstance. For example, if the family breaks apart, the moved family gets played after the original family.

Part 2. I build and/or upgrade all my lots slowly. Whenever I get the itch or inspiration to build I run with it. I usually get the feeling when it's beginning to be necessary in my game. Sometimes you need a coffee shop for a date… then a restaurant… then you think: wow my sims can meet more people at a bar. I build based off my wants and my gameplay needs. With that being said, I also love making my own hoods and slowly building up the town are more sims join the rotations (kinda like a BACC, but not really).

Part 3. I am never opposed to moving sims into a different house/location or simply sending them off on a vacation. Maybe even making sure they leave the house for more mundane reasons. When was the last time you took your kid to the park, you monster? You'd be surprised on how refreshing it can be. Also, how realistic. Gone are the days where your sim lived in the same home from College to Elderhood. Gone are the days where your sim never used their vacation days. Gone are they days where your sim only ever knew the four walls you built around them. Hopefully with doors and windows... but maybe not.. Rule #5. Remember Who You Are, SIMba. Keep in mind that the sims truly is your game. Your imagination. Your little world. You can make it as perfect or as chaotic as you want. As someone who's roots are in "the perfect sim/family" type gameplay, I always allow at least 1 if not 2-3 families who fit that bill somehow, to keep my little heart happy. (Another great idea for you comes from the movie "Don't Worry Darling": think of a town where everything is the 1950's vision of perfect - but everyone *is* happy... until... and fill in the blank as you go.) I digress, you can try out any/all these rules. You can even take inspiration from my game or ideas I layed out in this first ever post here, but at the end of the day, you will always be you. The Sims will always be your game. Don't be afraid to try things, don't be afraid to be your real and truest self. For some of you that means a town of insane sims wearing chicken costumes, and for others that might be trying to actually create the perfect town/family (I challenge you to make sure they have not 1 bad memory). Either way, and all the ways, I hope that this post at the least gave you joy and at the best gave you inspiration. More to come in the future! Have an exellent day, meaghanplumbob xox

[izayoichan]

He shook his head as Hayden stopped talking and just closed his eyes and drifted back to sleep. It had been a bad week again, but he had managed to talk Vy into heading to school with the promise he would stay.

“Hayden?”

He gently put the wristband on him, giving him a little bit of a painkiller that Hayle had brought back with him from one off his trips home, something his brother had found from a plant in his kingdom, but it was a rare plant, and it didn’t blossom often enough for be used every day. Today though was one of those days where he needed it, which had worried Vy and it had taken almost an hour talk between them to make him go to school. He could see his son relax, and sleep more comfortably, a he put his hand on his forehead. The downside to the medicine was that he tended to spike in temperature, but he had two bags of ice prepared just in case. For now, though, it seemed it wasn’t needed.

“Mrow.” “Yeah, you can guard him too.”

He smiled, both the animals were lying by the bottom off the bed like they normally did when Hayden was “alone”. His mind wandered as he sat there, his eyes following the scars on his son’s body. Their uncle had visited to help when he heard about the attack, alongside Hayle they had managed to strengthen his ice side slightly, while he had been able to calm the fire one. He had asked if this was something they could make permanent, but as Hayle’s brother had explained, it would not be possible. It was a huge strain on his body, as it messed with what was its natural balance, but at the moment they did it, his body was already out of balance, and it stopped some of the internal burns.

He still felt bad about it even happening, he had always thought he would have noticed it if he changed, but it was Rylan that had sensed it before he had. He had even asked his boss about it, who had just shook his head, and mentioned he is not his own family’s reaper. Which of course was a good point, he wasn’t but he was happy the one that was, had given him that chance when he asked even if he had sometimes doubted that decision later.

“Dad?” “Mmm?” “What time is it?” “Hmh, around two in the afternoon, why?” “Just felt like I have been asleep for a while.” “Waiting for Vy to come home?” “Yeah, we have a new book were reading together.”

Chris smiled, it was one of few things he knew his son enjoyed doing. It was something they did together, and it was easy for him to keep up with. Even with bad weeks like this, they were able to read a little, and then just talk about it afterwards.

“Are you ready for the weekend you think?” “Rylan said we could have the session in here if needed, so I would like to hope so.” “Yes, it should work, have you talked about food?” “Oh yeah, we decided home made.”

Chris chuckled, as he had the last year almost never been told to go get food for them anymore, which he didn’t really mind, he had to admit and agree with them that the homemade food was much better.

“What homemade?” “Ehm… Pizza and taco I think we ended on, dad said he would make a list and go shopping with you when he came back.” “Sounds good to me, Pizza will be handy to have if you end up playing late, which I know your normally do.” “Yup! And it’s nice to eat cold, can’t say the same for Taco.”

Hayden looked at his dad for a bit, it was nice to have this time alone with him, even as a child they often had more time with Hayle for obvious reasons.

“The woman, is she like you?”

Chris looked at his son, at first not quite grasping what he was talking about, but then it dawned on him.

“Yes, she is like me.” “So she is…?” “Yes.” “She is nice though.” “She is, trained by Nat just like I was. Fairly new too.” “I always wondered this, how does a reaper get attached to a family?” “Well, it is a complicated process most of the time, and simpler other times. Our reaper, which of course can’t be me, was one that was new, and as you were born, she was assigned to be our reaper. For older families, it can be a rotation, to stop the reaper from getting attached, and other times they stick by a family for as long as that family exists..” “Do you have a rotation, or do you stick with families.”

He looked at his son, quite enjoying their talk. He remembered they had asked when they were younger, but they never had the time or the patience to listen to it.

“I have families, and then I help with accidents and unforeseen events.” “Do you have River’s family?” “Yes, which is why he felt so uncomfortable around me, we met before, but he only vaguely remembers it.” “Does Rylan know?” “No, he never asked, but I think he suspects it.” “But… when River comes back, and if he holds his promise, will you stay their reaper?” “I am not sure, the norm would be to change family so I assume it might go that way.”

He noticed his son looking at him, and he could guess what he had on his mind.

“Yes, you would have gotten the question” “Would you have said yes, if you know what you know now, and how it is?” “Hmh, I ‘m honestly not sure, I don’t regret the saying yes now with all I have in my life, but if I was with nothing, then I would be more torn. It is a hard job, and it takes, as you know, take a lot of time, which is fine when you are alone, but gets more complicated when you have a family.” “Did you every regret it, I mean… the bachelor and having a family?” “Nah, I only regret not having as much time with you as I want to.”

They talked for a while longer, until they heard steps outside the door, and then a light knock, followed by Vy’s head sticking inside.

“Come on in Vy.” “Okay!”

Chris pulled back, leaving the two to their talk and their book, having told Vy he had given him some of the painkiller, so that he was aware Hayden would probably get a bit worse when it wore off later.

“Did you have a good day Hay hay?” “Yeah, how was yours.” “Meh, school is time without you, bad times!” “They still pestering you?” “Nothing to bother with Hay hay.”

Hayden sighed, wishing he was strong enough to go with him and give them all a piece off his mind, but he had a different idea he had to talk to both his parents about. One that would give Vy more means to go do to school and go on trips and such.

“Want to read Hay hay?” “Yeah, let’s read.”

He felt Vy’s arm around him as he pulled him to rest on his chest, picking up the book they were currently reading continuing where they had left off the day before. A couple of hours later when Chris checked in on them, Hayden was sleeping, while Vy was doing his homework smiling at him when he looked in on them.

“Hungry Vy?” “Yes!” “What should I get you?” “Ehm, do we have any more of those cinnamon buns?” “I believe so, I’ll check and come back.” “Thank you mister Chris!”

He chuckled, wondering if one day, Vy would stop calling him mister as he walked down to the kitchen to check on certain baked goods, hoping to have some time to talk to Rylan a bit when he came home.

Beginning - Previous - Next

[nighttimepixels]

TALK TO US ABOUT MASS EFFECT I HAVE BEEN AN INSANE MASS EFFECT/SHAKARIAN TRASH PERSON SINCE 20-FUCKING-11 AND LEMME TELL YOU THOSE FEELINGS HAVENOT TARNISHED A SINGLE FRACTION IN THOSE TEN YEARS OH MY GOOOOOOODDDSSSS!!!!!!!

I DEMAND A PLAY-BY-PLAY UP TO THE MINUTE OF YOUR REACTIONS TO EVERYTHING!!!!

you are so valid and I totally see why everyone I've ever mentioned it to loves the hell out of it

aksdjlsdfj I meannnn if you want to hear my rambling about it then hell yeah

Okay, gonna put this below the cut to save everyone else XD also- since I'm not leaving this Mass Effect obsession anytime soon, if you're not interested in seeing occasional posts about it, please feel free to block the tag "night plays ME"~

(mild spoilers ahead??)

((also for real I mean it when I say this is rambling as hell lol, apologies and no stress if absolute no one reads all this))

OKAY SO Mass Effect 1-

Stars help me, I was honestly hooked right from the start?? Like even in Legendary Edition (the combined trilogy just re-released in one "can play it on one system + minor improvements", for anyone who doesn't know) where it's smoothed out, of course it's obvious that ME1 is a decade old... but the foundation for these relationships are all there and gods I love them already.

Like - Kaiden right off the top is a delightful good fightin lad, what the hell. I've heard that he's viewed as 'bland' by a good portion of the fan community but I dunno, he's a delight and even more complex by the time 2 rolls around and you encounter him on Horizon, it was honestly Ashley I was way more meh about - mostly because before you can learn about her family history/etc, she comes off as hella xenophobic and I was immediately offended for my growing space family that she didn't like/trust all the aliens around, pfff.

(she gets redeemed a bit through further actions/evolving thoughts, but I thought in retrospect it was a bummer that they didn't flip the order there, give her a chance to be liked before the complicating factor of being so rude about aliens >:c that then she could grow from... ah well. Apparently she has a good arc but uh, let's just say I chose Kaiden at the "key junction" in the latter part of the game so I won't be seeing anymore of Ashley uh... anytime soon, haha.)

Garrus??? Is??????? The ABSOLUTE best???????????

I liked him from the start, I'm always a bit of a sucker for a rogue-detective "the system won't bring this bastard to justice, so I've got to" type and all their moral shadiness XD But he just gets better, honestly, and where I'm at in ME2 (right before the Reaper IFF mission, as of typing this, with everyone's loyalty!) I am only digging myself deeper into this hole-

-*wheezing* okay anyways -

Wrex is AMAZING I love fightin' middle-aged krogan bastard, gods. Liara is great too, I'm a sucker for a wlw relationship (playing fem!Shepard, so) - buuuut I'll admit she's a bit more one-note in ME1. Last week while I was still on ME1 I remember hearing (while trying to dodge spoilers) that her arc is really good, though. I think they leaned a little hard on the 'innocent but sexy' sterteotype on her (so despite the yikes aspect of a few of the things I've learned in ME2, lol, I actually really like the complexity that's been added to her character.)

Saved Liara first, so by the time I got to Noveria and had the standoff with Benezia there was the chance to have emotions over Liara having to face her TwT and of course, I made the questionable but quality decision to free Queen Rachni heheh. no ragrets

More than a blow-by-blow of my choices though I totally wanna take the chance to say that even in the mild jankiness of ME1 (goddammit, the Mako.... please..... please just go up this impossible cliff I just want to resource hunt-) the way that the lore, both obvious/key to main plot and the lesser/filler/background/world-building kinds... I just love it. It incorporates it well, you can go ham in the codex learning more, or just dive into the basics - it's clearly a complex galaxy (and they do an even better job in 2 of fleshing it out further), and it never really felt overwhelming. It was pretty natural figuring it all out-!

Plus the interesting implications of resource hunting amongst the sapient races, and the little side missions you better bet I did every one of- there's so much rich depth in the story if you do 'em!! (And that lead with that Keeper side mission...? Looking back, damn, clever foreshadowing-!!!)

And oh my gods, Ilios??? hell yeah. I loved that mission so much, especially having Garrus & Kaiden with me when talking to the hologram/computer, and more than anything, that last sprint in the Mako trying to get to the jump before it closed-???

yeet the boi-

Also mannn I love a good setpiece, and having to go up the side of the elevator, space-side?? such a cool setup!!

Plus it felt good having been Paragon enough (as simple as the good v bad vibe system is, I don't hate it, lol) to avoid one of the Saren fights, ngl. And the er, "second fight" with Sovereign-Saren.... hell yeah

... I'll admit I had to double check my choice re whether to save the Council. I did in the end, but I swear, sometimes the way they phrase things I'm like ".... okay but Garrus is right, defeating Sovereign is more important than these few leaders??????" woops. Listen, priorities, is all I'm saying..... (￣ヮ￣|||)ゞ

'Course later they emphasize (in ME2) that there were 10,000 people on that same ship and I was like well I wouldn't have second guessed if I'd known that, I mean c'mon-

Also I did indeed romance Liara in this one, so I got that scene ;Dc But,,,, I also knew by the end that I was totally gonna romance Garrus in 2 since he's an option then finally,,,,, lemme tell you the guilt as I waffled over whether to romance Liara bc of it. hahaha.

Aaaaand Mass Effect 2-

So I'm only up to right before the Reaper IFF Mission, so I don't know the ending, etc etc lol. That said, I've just finished every side mission I've found with the exception of the Shadowbroker Quest and the Arrival Quest (I've heard the latter basically leads into ME3, and the former is best either right before the Omega 4 jump or in postgame).

So from the start - fuck yeah fuck yeah what a high adrenaline start Shepard noooooo but also yes save Joker aH-

The motion comic too hot damn nice job

I loved this setup, seriously - especially forcing Shep into this situation, having to work with/for Cerberus, and the compelling reasoning given behind "why" they do what they do (I especially found it a good point that the Salarians have the Task Force, the Asaris the Commandos, the Turians the- etc... like, true, when you put it like that, having a similar group advancing human interests/solving human interstellar problems is pretty reasonable...). That said, I love too that it really isn't shied away from how Cerberus is nonetheless fucked up - or its at least done fucked up stuff.

Listen, I still think some messed up stuff is gonna be revealed in 2's endgame......... after that Horizon mission and the Collector's ship???? TIM I SEE YOU YOU SHADY MF-

aaanyways lol...

I'm so so glad on a gameplay level they nixed the Mako style exploration. A few Hammerhead missions are fine and a lot more focused than the slippery ass navigation in that glorified ATV, pfff. The probes are a neat way of getting after similar resources - and more importantly, having good levels and some good hubs (the Zakera Wards, Omega, Ilium, etc) is way way more fun than having a more 'sprawling' space that is.... a lot of empty nonsense, lol.

Then there's the fact that we get Joker right off the bat and you can interact with him so much - and him and EDI??? Get out gods I love them. Kasumi is so right when she says they sound like a bickering old married couple lol. I have a terrible feeling that some shit is gonna happen with EDI..... but I don't think she's evil as-is, at least.

Side-eying the hell out of those "access forbidden" parts of her that she doesn't even know.... and the fact that her AI core has a locked door access................... something's gonna happen gdi LEAVE OUR ADOPTED AI ALONE.

(Also Joker pls stop fracturing your thumb on the mute button)

Also please save me there are so many hot aliens in this game,,,,, the xeno/monsterfuckers really comin' through strong in the sequels............... doin' the lord's work........................................

In general, I love how many levels ME stepped up in two with complexity and interwoven narratives!! Like, to the point it'd be almost a drag to replay ME1, even though it was fun going through it (if occasionally a bit tedious with the cookie cutter rando planet science/mine facilities, lol). Like, just from how fun and interesting ME2 is, mostly! more of all the pre-introduced races, plus new ones, plus more filling in of intragalactic politics, and more interesting implications of all these space-faring races mixing....

Also gods WREX and his planet holy shit,,,,, fuckin' hell yeah my man get their shit together and also adopt Grunt yes good-

And Mordin??? My singing semi-evil scientist best friend forced to confront his choices more than he thought he ever would have???? With some of the best ongoing general report chatter of all the companions??

(when I tell you I choked on my coffee when I talked to him after confirming romance choice w/ Garrus and that 'pamphlet' and 'anaphalactic shot if ingesting-' kajsldkfjsldfjk)

Like, fuck, the fact that they actually dive into the mixed morality and horrors of the genophage, and you can confront Mordin on it, for good reason, yet he still stands his ground, until finally some bits of his loyalty mission seem to... affect him, and I'm guessing might set up things for 3 with him? Unsure, but either way, damn, the fact that they start to dig into it...

And Taliiiii my beloved forbidden alien wife TwT her loyalty mission was SO GOOD. I love how varied they all are?? Getting to defend her and discover what she'd unwittingly been a part of-!!

Zaeed is a bastard but tbh I love that he is and that he's unapologetic in him - and Kasumi omg, best thief. A heist?? Gods, yes- I love our couch lounge chats XD

Samara is..... illegally.......... she's an illegally powerful and beautiful and eloquent MILF...........................

(.... listen I'm sapphic as hell and I'm kicking my own ass for picking her up last aksjdlfksjdfl - but her loyalty mission, damn. And seeing how there's this interesting cultural subset, and the struggle with the Asari in that they unquestioningly accept/respect justicars, but also know that the impact outside their culture is a diplomacy nightmare waiting to happen-)

,.,,,,,T,,, Thane,,,,,

I am weak for morally implicated murder dads okay?? And that voice??? His mannerisms?????? How you first see him, and that prayer after assassinating her...???????? And his history/his people's history with the hanar, gods I love how messy it is, it feels so much more real!

Also Jack is a mess and I love her (and want to get her some therapy, omg), and her and Miranda nearly duking it out after you've done both their loyalty missions??? so good and makes a lot of sense-! Honestly I would love more interactions between teammates on the ship, but there's already so much the devs had to balance I can't blame 'em for minimizing, heh. But suffice to say I also love Miranda and Jacob, even if I'm softest for my alien crew XD Hell yeah Jacob, we'll get loud and spill drinks on the citadel indeed TwT

.... I could write a whole essay on how much I love Garrus oTL Perhaps because he and Tali are the throughlines from 1 on your 2 crew, I have some of the strongest feelings about them... but genuinely, he was one of my favorite companions in the first game, and how you find him as Archangel in two? Getting to help him fight his way out after he's gone nearly 48 hours straight fighting off three gangs alone, jfc. His vengeance quest and what can happen there.... That line? fuck me, that line -

It's so much easier to see the world in black and white. Grey? I don't know what to do with gray...

How DARE you come for my heart like this, devs holy shit

(also, some other choice faves so far from the series from him include We can disobey suicidal orders?? and This wasn't in my training manual... [in 1, if you have him with you @ th Thorian fight] and his whole.... pop the heat sink - in his romance ;Dc)

asdasdfksadjfkl like I said I can write an essay on him PFFF suffice to say I'm very looking forward to his romance scene and where things go in 3

But yeah gods I'm just gonna keep rambling if I'm not careful lol. Gods I don't even know what to talk about it's all so good and while I can understand people roasting the obviousness of Paragon V Renegade (v neutral) choices/alignments, I think they do a pretty damn good job in 2 of pushing it further - to the point that there were some times that I accidentally got renegade points and I wasn't that mad, haha. There's so much fun in the interactions that I just have a good time anyways~

I have so many thoughts about TIM (The Illusive Man) and Cerberus.... theories evolving galore............... and like, what the hell!! Omega 4 going to the center of the galaxy is such a cool twist, goddamn - though my heart still breaks at losing Kaiden (his line if you haven't romanced him?? about feeling like he lost a limb when he lost you??? holy shit.... but I also can't blame him for not trusting Cerberus to the point of it affecting his ability to trust Shepard... like fuck Shep go after himmmm) I'm really excited to see where that goes since he comes back in 3, and what the fuck happens with Cerberus bc while I love the fact that obviously there are a lot of people in it for the right reasons, doing good work, there are those that are doing the opposite, and I have a very bad feeling about where TIM will end up landing....

All that said though I need to do the Reaper IFF mission (where I'm lightly spoiled as to getting That Boy, but not how/what happens to make it so - just that it's apparently wise to have all your side missions done before getting him...) and the actual Omega 4 jump. So we'll see what happens and what I think about it from there heheh!

.... major kudos and genuine props if you made it here to the end, I am so sorry for not editing on condensing all this, and appreciate you so much ;w;

[thesevenseraphs]

Bungie Weekly Update - 3/14/19

This week at Bungie, we restored the Thorn in your side.

If you can remember your first revive in Old Russia, other memories of Thorn may plague your nightmares from time to time. This week, those same nightmares returned in full force. If you’re a Guardian who’s new around these parts, get ready to feel the sting.

Owners of the Annual Pass can begin the journey to acquire this weapon by sifting through the ashes of the EDZ. Earn a weapon fit for a villain, and unleash chaos among your foes. To celebrate, we’re also adding new Bungie Rewards for players to earn as they complete the quest and other content in Season of the Drifter. The following rewards will be added to the website on March 19, 2019:

Thorn T-Shirt/Replica:

Earn Thorn in game

Must have opted in to receive emails for all Bungie Rewards

Bungie Rewards Code may be generated and redeemed from March 19 through June 4, 2019

Gambit Prime Jersey:

Win a match of Gambit Prime with a single complete set of Notorious armor equipped for a single role

Can unlock the ability to purchase one jersey for each role by winning a Gambit Prime match with a set of Notorious equipped for that role

Must have opted in to receive emails for all Bungie Rewards

Bungie Rewards Code may be generated and redeemed from March 19 through June 4, 2019

Thorn wasn't the only thing happening in Destiny 2 this week. Guardians also faced a difficult question on Tuesday…

Picking Sides

Do you side with the Vanguard or the Drifter? Depending on your choice, you’ll receive a set of rewards specific to your allegiance. Through the Allegiance quest, each side will offer unique lore. Each week you’ll receive a small package as gratitude for your pledge. Throughout Season of the Drifter, depending on your pledge, one of these packages will be found at Ikora or Drifter upon each weekly reset:

Vanguard Weekly Package:

Powerful Vanguard Gear

Boon of the Vanguard

10 Vanguard Tactician Tokens

Enhancement Core

Drifter Weekly Package:

Powerful Gambit Gear

Collector Synth

Invader Synth

Sentry Synth

Reaper Synth

100 Infamy Points

If you’re the type of player who wants it all, or you're an all-out lore collector, you can make a different pledge on alternate characters. Just remember that your choice will last. You can either side with a slick-talking Drifter or be like me and side with those who protect the last safe city and its people.

There’s no bias here, I swear!

Prove Your Worth

Last week, Reckoning tiers 1 and 2 went live, bringing players to the plane of the Nine. Tomorrow, tier 3 will become available, opening the chase to fully unlock your Gambit Prime perks. This activity will have a Power level requirement of 680. Players will need to fully upgrade their synthesizer to enter. Modifiers are also active in this playlist, so be ready to mix your arsenal up for the challenge.

Matchmaking will continue to be available if you’re looking to take on the challenge without a pre-made fireteam. Things may be a little trickier without strategy or communication, so prepare for some white-knuckles as you race the clock to eliminate the darkness. We’ll be watching, as will the Nine.

Speaking of the Nine, Invitations of the Nine also begins tomorrow.

To begin, you’ll need to track down Xûr. In addition to his Exotic inventory, he’ll also offer a quest item for you to complete each week, for up to nine weeks. Each week you engage, you’ll be invited to learn more about the Nine and unlock lore pages to dive deeper into their story.

Polish and Prime

With Season of the Drifter little more than a week old, we’re tracking down some bugs to squash and quality-of-life to address. We’ll be deploying hotfixes and updates, along with some back-end server changes to help keep things fresh. Here’s a quick list of changes specific to Gambit, Gambit Prime, and Reckoning that are currently in-flight.

Gambit Matchmaking [Revised 2:20 PM 3/14/19]

With the release of this very blog article, Gambit received some updates to matchmaking. Gambit is a team based activity and as such, players who are in a pre-made fireteam have a communication advantage. To offset that advantage, we've raised the internal skill rating of pre-made fireteams to pull in higher skill enemies to fight against. With this change, even as a solo player, you'll still have a chance. Plus, your other matched fireteam mates should be higher skilled as well.

Solo players of low skill should expect to match other solo players more frequently. Higher skill teams will also match teams more frequently.

Gambit Prime Synths

Shortly after the release of Gambit Prime, players began filling their inventory with Prime Armor Synths. Tentatively planned for Hotfix 2.2.0.2, players will be able exchange a stack of 5 Synths for 100 Glimmer with the Drifter. The intention of this isn’t to give players a means of acquiring large amounts of Glimmer, but strictly to help address inventory issues.

Reckoning Modifiers

In early playtests at the studio, Prism proved to be more challenging than intended in higher Tiers of Reckoning and we planned to remove it in the first patch proactively. When we launched last week, we collected some fairly positive feedback with Prism and wanted to react quickly and remedy that change. Since Glass seemed more problematic, we wanted to take action there too. Tentatively planned for Hotfix 2.2.0.2, we will be replacing Glass with Prism. Tier 3 goes live tomorrow,  so we’ll continue to monitor feedback and make adjustments as needed.

As with all things in development, any of these forecast changes could be altered or delayed. For the most current information on our plans and progress, stay tuned for patch notes.

Persistent Upkeep

Week in and week out, Player Support is at the ready to lend a helping hand when issues arise in Destiny 2. This week, they have some vital information for those preparing to pick a side in the Allegiance quest. No, they’re not telling you to pledge to the Vanguard (even though you totally should), but making sure your experience is smooth and issue free.

This is their report.

Destiny 2 Hotfix 2.2.0.1

In last week’s Player Support Report, we highlighted an issue where some players’ weekly bounties for Ada-1 and Petra Venj did not refresh at the weekly reset, instead refreshing the following Sunday. With the conclusion of this week’s maintenance, we expect this issue to be resolved. In addition to this change, we’d like to also highlight the resolution of the following issues:

Drifter’s Weapon Pursuits: Fixed an issue where the pursuits for Malfeasance and Breakneck were not progressing as expected in Gambit and Gambit Prime.

“The Best Offense” Triumph: Fixed an issue where the Triumph “The Best Offense,” which awards Oxygen SR3, wasn't counting the correct number of Orbs of Light generated in strike activities.

Gambit Maps: Fixed an issue where Blockers were not spawning on Kell’s Grave and Cathedral of Scars. These maps have since been re-enabled in the Gambit playlist.

For the full list of issues resolved in Tuesday’s hotfix, players should visit the Destiny 2 Hotfix 2.2.0.1 patch notes.

Known Issue Callout: Losing Allegiance Pursuits

This week, players who own the Destiny 2: Forsaken Annual Pass are being asked to make a choice; pledge to the Vanguard, or side with the Drifter.

Since this ultimatum has gone live, Destiny Player Support has monitored reports regarding an issue where players who make their choice while they have a full Pursuit inventory are not receiving either quest item, regardless of which side they chose.

We are currently working to resolve this issue in an upcoming hotfix. In the meantime, all players should ensure they have space available in their Pursuits inventory prior to accepting either of these quests from the Drifter. As always, we’ll be sure to sound off with more information when it's available.

Destiny 2 Season of the Drifter Known Issues

Whether you choose to stand tall with the Vanguard or join the Drifter’s crew, we’ve got the details you need on the latest known issues in Destiny 2.

Allegiance Quest—Titan Adventure: Players should be aware that the beacon for launching the Titan heroic adventure for the Allegiance quest is not the usual heroic adventure beacon, but is instead near it in the same room.

Allegiance Quest—Banking Motes: We are investigating an issue where Motes banked in Gambit are not progressing this quest step. Currently, only Motes banked in Gambit Prime are applying progress.

Allegiance Quest—Tapes: We are investigating an issue where players can become blocked from progressing their Allegiance quest if not all tapes are successfully scanned in the EDZ.

Power Surge Bounties: We are investigating an issue where the Power Surge bounties can expire after 7 days, and are not recoverable if they are deleted.

Warlock Ball Lightning Melee: We are investigating an issue where the Stormcaller Warlock’s Ball Lightning melee ability isn't activating perks on some weapons, Conduction Tines on Crown of Tempests, or Vampire’s Caress on Karnstein Armlets.

Iron Banner Rolls: We are investigating reports regarding an issue where some Iron Banner weapons may have re-rolled perks after Update 2.2.0.

Delayed Dragonfly: We are investigating reports regarding an issue where the explosion caused by the Dragonfly weapon perk is delayed slightly.

Finding Thorn: Players will not be able to receive the quest item for Thorn if their Pursuits inventory is full when they investigate the world object.

For the running list of all issues tracked by Destiny Player Support, players are encouraged to visit our Destiny 2 Known Issues help page. Players who encounter other issues should report to the #Help forum. When reporting a gameplay issue, providing screenshots, captured video, or repro steps will help Destiny Player Support investigate your report.

[cadavre-exquis-rp]

At Cadavre Exquis we won’t have predetermined subplots in the traditional sense, but organizations and institutions that will more-or-less serve the same purpose and be involved as the site plot moves forward. We encourage you to plan on taking roles within these groups because we have some super fun things planned for them! However, they are meant to be a dynamic thing: staff will make additions in the future, and members will also be able to contribute their own part to the lore -- adding places of business and other groups to our affiliations page.

A quick note, before you dive in: these are partly abridged versions, so be sure to give the actual descriptions a look-over on site for additional information once we go live.

THE ROUND TABLE is an age-old network of hunting clans spread across the continent and beyond. Families control territory of major cities and often lend muscle to one another. However, the Great War has caused a new wave of ascendants, as old families are replaced by new. After the Catastrophe and reports of unconstrained (or perhaps, unrestrained) activity in Paris, Paris’ foremost clan has called a meeting of the Round Table for the first time since the Reign of Terror beneath the vampire Robespierre.

MEMBERS MAY INCLUDE: HUMANS

THE LEAGUE OF EXTRAORDINARY GENTLEMEN was formed in response to a decrease in hunting activities during the Great War, a group of like-minded creatures that understood that some of their kind could take advantage of the chaos and risk exposing them all. The League is comprised exclusively of creatures, a transient organization in nature and fluid. They are perhaps not well loved amongst their kind, considering their line of work, and as such, membership is somewhat fluid, but headed by a constant triumvirate. Now that the Great War has concluded and the traditional hunting clans begin to filter back to the major cities and rebuild, the League is seeking to understand its role in the new world order.

MEMBERS MAY INCLUDE: WIXEN, VAMPIRES, LOUP GAROU, MELUSINE.

THE WIXEN COUNCIL of Paris Below are first and foremost servants – stewards of the secret city beyond the catacombs. The inaugural council were some of the most revered wixen of their time, although have mostly been consigned to fairytales: they bound the Horror to its prison and cast the enchantments that built Paris Below and have since preserved it. THE FIVE – as they are alternatively known – serve life terms: they are to keep the peace among the species and ensure that the haven remains beyond the prying eyes of Man. The Catastrophe has brought newfound scrutiny and newfound stress to the Council, who are experiencing the first major exposure to Paris Above in this millenium.

MEMBERS MAY INCLUDE: WIXEN.

LA GRANDE ÉCOLE reigns supreme in Paris Above. Power in Paris has long been brokered behind closed doors, as its vampiric community is responsible for dispersing their own brand of justice in Paris Above and to ensure that the city itself is stable. Although the days of roaming fledgling armies have long passed, the ancients still play their chess games with unwitting pawns. This vampiric council is moving through time effortlessly, accompanied by the lilt of laughter and the clink of champagne glasses. Membership is traditionally fluid, as the ancients know better than to assume that time is static, and ambitions rise and fall.

MEMBERS MAY INCLUDE: VAMPIRES.

THE GEVAUX PACK is the dominant loup garou pack in Paris. Unlike traditional packs, Gevaux has held fast to a set of moral principles, enabling them to peacefully coexist with Parisian hunters. They do not condone the turning of citizens, and have a strict policy on using Loup Garou powers outside of necessity. Older members are often Imprinted on human (often times hunter) handlers, ensuring their turnings are controllable for as long as possible. By choosing uninfected humans, those watching over them will not fall to the same monstrosity they will. Because of this trusted relationship with those outside of the disease, Gevaux are one of the few packs that allow people to join who have not contracted the illness.

MEMBERS MAY INCLUDE: LOUP GAROU.

THE OROBOS PACK is newer to Paris and is largely regarded as the most fearsome pack in world history. They are a mob of sorts, with influence in every corner of western society. The masterful use of Loup Garou infiltration has transcended into art. There is no place they do not have eyes, and no tactic they will not use. New recruits are turned on purpose, and promised riches for their loyalty. They strike quick and fast; it is well known in international circles that the Reaper comes with a howl. They have recently entered the Parisian stage, for in the wake of the great war, there is ground to be gained. OROBOS does not miss chances such as these.

MEMBERS MAY INCLUDE: LOUP GAROU.

Internationally known for their naturalistic horror shows, LE THEATRE DU GRAND GUIGNOL is one of the most obscure theaters in Paris. Their specialization of the macabre has caused audiences to applaud, faint, and vomit. So real are these productions, that patrons often confess that they feel a part of the performances – for better or worse. Behind the curtain, the GRAND GUIGNOL is a safe haven for the runaways of Paris Below. Their cast is built of melusine who have abandon their waters, fledgling vampires, and aging Loup Garou. These are the creatures of the night, who have turned to the stage to find immortality in shocking the Parisian elite.

MEMBERS MAY INCLUDE: MELUSINES, LOUP GAROU, VAMPIRES.

THE NIGHT MARKET has long formed the heart and soul of Paris Below, attracting magical merchants and artisans from all over the globe. Here you may find, hidden beyond the facades of surrounding buildings, an alchemist’s laboratory, or a jeweller’s boutique, selling rare moonstones and golden trinkets. At night, the marketplace fills with temporary stalls, fluid and ever-changing, presenting the newest wares from each corner of the world.

MEMBERS MAY INCLUDE: MELUSINES, LOUP GAROU, VAMPIRES.

Driven by anger and frustration regarding their current situation among the supernatural creatures of Paris, rogue Melusines have gathered together and formed LES CORSAIRES DE LA SEINE: aided by their powers, they are a danger to heed. Their ship is known to appear, quite unexpectedly, out of the mist – and they show little mercy for the merchant ships they rob. In recent years, LES CORSAIRES DE LA SEINE have taken on like-minded strays, regardless of their origin. Now, Loup Garoux, Vampires, and even a few disgruntled Wix have thrown in their lot with these powerful river sirens. Their goal is to dominate the life waters of Paris – but some day, Paris might not be enough.

MEMBERS MAY INCLUDE: MELUSINE, LOUP GAROU, VAMPIRES, WIXEN.

There are, however, certain supernatural groups that wish to influence over Paris Above in more subversive, cerebral ways. One such example is the CENTRALE SURRÉALISTE, a corps of wixen artists, writers, filmmakers, performers and psychologists guided by the principles of Surrealism. Members of this ensemble are wixen adept at metaphysical magic, illusions and psychological manipulations, and who meet at cafes and art spaces to discuss new ways of expressing the unconscious self. Their intent is to influence and change both Paris Above and Below through art and — eventually — beyond art. Members of this group use the burgeoning Surrealist movement to ensure their place and visibility among “human” society; their enchantments become art and philosophies that influence thought and perception.

MEMBERS MAY INCLUDE: WIXEN, UNWITTING HUMANS.

One particular branch of the Parisian Government has taken serious notice of the supernatural going-ons. For nearly two centuries, the INSPECTION GÉNÉRALE DES CARRIÈRES (or: THE INSPECTION OF MINES SERVICE) has navigated, mapped and renovated the Parisian underground, including its ossuaries and catacombs, and thus has been aware of the effects of the Catastrophe almost from the beginning. Its members are currently exploring the catacombs that have collapsed as a result of the catastrophe, cataloguing surreal occurrences and strange happenings. They have also begun employing questionable professionals: so-called “Loup Garoux Experts”, disgraced detective-inspectors, wix and vampire hunters, psychics, mercenaries experienced in big game hunting, and even dubious psychologists expelled from well-respected universities.

MEMBERS MAY INCLUDE: HUMAN ENGINEERS, ARCHITECTS, HISTORIANS, DETECTIVES, SO-CALLED SUPERNATURAL EXPERTS AND HUNTERS, SCIENTISTS, PSYCHOLOGISTS.

[deebormzone]

Klingdom Harps 3: Who’s the (Secret) Boss?

Sorry I haven’t written much lately. I recently got the standard English major’s retail job, which sucks away most of my energy. I gotta toughen up so I can produce more insightful content, like this:

I like Kingdom Hearts a lot because it lets me jump and fight and also my friend Jafar is there.

The big KH news, which is a couple months old by now, is that Kingdom Hearts 3 finally has a vaguely estimated release window: 2018. Now I can worry less about whether it will really come out, and more about how much of it will be DLC.

Besides DLC, series creator Nomura has also spoken about the now-traditional secret boss battle. In other Kingdom Hearts titles, there are one or more optional fights, designed to be the most difficult encounters in the game. They’re usually Sephiroth.

In terms of the secret boss, we can’t say anything at this time, but in terms of Sephiroth specifically, my development team are worried that we’ve had him come back so many times so they’re maybe worried it might be redundant at this point. We’re still deliberating on it.

I'm with the development team here. There’s room for more than just Sephy. But assuming they do put a secret boss in KH3 (and since the other big KH games have had secret bosses, excluding one from the biggest Hearts yet would be pretty shameful), who could compete with everyone’s favorite silver-haired genetic abomination?

There are actually a few good options. Here are some dudes I’d like to face in Kingdom Hearts 3 as an uberboss, loosely arranged from least cool to most cool. The only real requirement is that they be either Square Enix or Disney characters.

Crystal Enthusiast: Culex

Culex is a secret boss already! He’s from Super Mario RPG, but designed to look and act like a Final Fantasy boss. It’s implied that he crossed over from the Final Fantasy series to look for strong opponents. I don’t know why he would go looking in the Mushroom Kingdom, but I guess it worked out for him.

With his dimension-hopping and challenge-seeking, Culex would be a good fit for Kingdom Hearts secret boss. This is basically a pipe dream, though. Since he’s actually from a Mario game, it’s pretty unlikely he’d be allowed in. It may be his fate to languish in Mario Land for all eternity...

Principal Samurai: Master Eraqus

Eraqus was a major character in the Kingdom Hearts prequel, Birth by Sleep. He used to teach the protagonists how to use their Keyblades properly. Most of his lessons seem to involve hitting things, but that does tend to build experience in every game in the whole series. Go with what works, I guess.

Of course, he had an unfortunate accident, but that doesn’t prevent him from being a boss. Just call him “Lingering Spirit” or whatever. He’s probably the most likely person on this list to actually appear as a superboss, if he doesn’t show up in Kingdom Hearts 3 in some other form.

But despite being fairly important, his fighting style is sort of basic. He’s got a couple of big moves, but not much else. And even though I usually struggle against him in Birth by Sleep, he’s not that tough canonically. There may be better options.

Evillest Clown: Kefka

Ah, Kefka. He’s the boss of Final Fantasy 6, the clown who usually takes second place on the Final Fantasy villain lists... and sometimes first. This makes him a natural choice for Square Enix superboss if Sephiroth isn’t around.

I’m always down to clown. Kefka’s a manic, psychotic sociopath, which is often more fun to play with than your usual uptight or brooding villain. His fighting style in Dissidia, the Final Fantasy fighting game, is to annoy his enemy to death. Notable achievements of his include blowing up the world and becoming God, making him significantly more successful than your average antagonist. No worries about an underpowered foe here, though I’d rather fight his clown form than his purple angel form.

Somehow, though, I don’t see him getting in. Final Fantasy 6 has had almost no representation in Kingdom Hearts thus far. Is that game even still popular?

That, and the wacky clown personality doesn’t go over well with everyone. It might not fit the “epic boss battle” they’re planning. Shame.

Fallen Mascot: Oswald

I always love the Disney-based antagonists, but it’s hard to pick a definitive one. Maleficent usually takes the lead in villain meetups, but she’s not secret enough to be a secret boss. Is there anyone good left from the House of Mouse, besides maybe Walt himself?

There are plenty of great Disney villains who haven’t shown up yet. Dr. Facilier would fit right in with his control of dark magic. Yzma’s alchemy and sorcery could make for an excellent boss battle. Madam Mim’s shapeshifting could be an intense multi-stage fight. Turbo would jump at the chance to dominate another video game. Hell, they should put Cruella de Vil in the game just because.

The trouble with all of these is that they’re all single-world threats. They don’t hit hard enough to match up to, you know, Sephiroth.

There’s another option, though. Oswald the Lucky Rabbit was Walt Disney’s first animated character, but he took a backseat to now-international-icon Mickey Mouse. Sometimes, though, he reemerges - most recently as a dark version of Mickey in the Epic Mickey series.

In Kingdom Hearts, Mickey is (hilariously) a messiah-like hero of light, so Oswald could conceivably be a reverse version. A cartoony Keyblade wielder with dark versions of Mickey’s god-powers. He’s got the prestige and the lore. Why not take him on?

Of course, the same issue that applies to Kefka affects Oswald: he’s innately goofy, which might damage the brooding, trenchcoat image of a secret ultimate boss. Of course, what with Gruff Mickey as he appears in Kingdom Hearts, maybe they’d make Oswald edgy enough to fit. Somehow.

Numberwang: Sho Minamimoto

Here’s one of Nomura’s creations who could use some more time in the spotlight. Minamimoto is a villain in The World Ends With You, a Reaper who hounds the characters. He’s known for making big piles of garbage and shouting mathematical functions at people (“Sine, cosine, tangent!”). Basically, a flawless character.

The protagonists from his game appeared in the most recent Kingdom Hearts as major players, so there’s some small precedent. Also, he turns into a demigod or something by the end of the game, so he’s probably strong enough.

There are a couple of other characters from The World Ends With You who could work here. First is Joshua, but he’s been in Kingdom Hearts already. Next is the actual TWEWY antagonist, but he’s kind of forgettable. There’s also a secret boss in TWEWY who could show up, but he’s only intimidating because you spent the whole game talking to him and assuming his unimportance.

No, the reason I went straight for Sho is because he’s a certified memer. Don’t underestimate that meme magic. I don’t remember much about the main bosses of TWEWY, but I absolutely remember Shouting Math Guy, and being memorable is what counts in a super-secret ultimate boss fight.

Sadly, this is just grasping at straws. In the end, Minamimoto is a little guy from a little game - on a Nintendo console, even. But you know what they say: a dream is a wish your heart makes.

Burn Victim: Darth Vader

Yeah, I went there. Star Wars is Disney now, and all bets are off. Up is down, black is white, the Jedi are evil.

I’ve seen a lot of comments online about how terrible it would be if Star Wars or Marvel got into Kingdom Hearts, but I just can’t understand them. The whole point of this franchise, besides making big buckets of money, is to rampage across a huge range of wacky environments. Adding Star Wars would be super wacky AND good for more money buckets, so they should do it the moment they get the chance. It’s as simple as that.

Let me address Marvel Comics for a moment. There are a number of villains from that universe who could appear in Kingdom Hearts as superbosses, but they don’t appeal to me very much. A comics expert probably has better opinions than I do, but the bad dudes powerful enough to show up seem kind of dull to me, and the interesting ones are too weak.

Planet-eating Galactus would be a good fit for Kingdom Hearts, but what does the big guy even do? Generic lasers and large hand slap? Doctor Doom is a classic, but when he fights mano a mano it ends up being tiny guns and foot dive. M.O.D.O.K.? A true role model and friend to all, but too weak. Magneto is the best cross between power and panache I can think of from Marvel, but beating up a Holocaust survivor probably crosses a few too many lines, even for Kingdom Hearts.

Despite my complaints, I’d be okay with just about anything from Marvel or Star Wars in the Kingdom of Heart. The wackier, the better, I always say. Still, my dreams of wackiness will likely go unfulfilled. The odds of getting any of that stuff in is pretty low at the moment. But what if there’s just enough influence to take just one piece of Star Wars into Kingdom Hearts? One character, for one fight, harder than any other?

Right off the bat, Vader commands more respect than Sephiroth. A lot more. Here’s a character everyone knows, one of the most infamous villains of all time. He fits the role of ultimate boss extremely well. He’s proficient in one-on-one combat, he’s filled with mystic powers, his saber fighting could lead to great Keyblade clashes, and he generally fits the light vs. darkness themes of Kingdom Hearts.

Beyond the Lucasfilm fees, though, there’s one other issue. His live-action-movie fighting style might not translate well to Kingdom Hearts’ hopping-around-and-exploding-into-beams-of-light fighting style. The game might actually be too goofy for Lord Vader. Maybe not, seeing as how Keyblade Dude Sora has faced off against live-action people before (Pirates of the Carribean and Tron), but the incongruity might be too much for the lawyers, if not the players.

There’s just one name left on my wishlist.

No, Darth Vader isn’t final enough to take the top spot. He’s a lousy dad.

My most wanted superboss candidate can only be THE #1 dad of all time.

The Best: Jecht

Jecht is like if sports became a human being. All he does is play ball, go on adventures, and insult his son. He’s perfect.

He stands alongside Sephiroth and Kefka as the more-or-less final boss of Final Fantasy X. There’s already a lot of X representation in Kingdom Hearts - Tidas is in, Wakka is in, Auron is in, YuRiPa is in. Adding the big man himself wouldn’t be much of a stretch. Plus, Jecht’s natural habitat is the stadium, which is where secret optional bosses are often fought.

This is the guy I want to fight as the secret boss. He’s a being of near-godlike power, and is also a dumb asshole who throws a ball at your head while calling you a wimp. He’s got the strength, and the pedigree as the boss of one of the most beloved Final Fantasies. No licencing issues, no nothing. His favorite prey is lame kids, and that’s basically main character Sora in a nutshell.

Best of all, though, is his fight song “Otherworld”, which (if you for some reason prefer not to hear its glory) is just a guy screaming over guitars. It tries so hard, it’s unbearably stupid. But then it tries even harder and loops back around to being really funny, and then loops some more until it’s actually a nice jam.

That closes out my list of potential secret bosses for Kingdom Hearts 3, but there are plenty of options I didn’t cover. In the end, I’ll be happy with any fight that’s fun and has a lot of exploding light particles. With luck, we might even get multiple secret bosses! It’s happened before.

Deeborm signing off for now. Here’s hoping Kingdom Hearts 3 will be worth the wait.

... but it will probably just be Sephiroth again.