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hand-in-my-pocket · 3 years

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“Hand in My Pocket” Lyrics Analysis

“Hand in My Pocket” is amazing for its ability to tell the story of any person’s life within it. If you listen to this song close enough, you can hear every detail of your life coursing through its verses. You see your most painful defeats and your most feverish exaltations somehow perfectly captured by the song. You hear your failures, your addictions, your temptations, your attempts to be a better person, your maturation, and your love for life. Alanis Morissette captured the true essence of life in this song.

Life is so sad and yet so happy. Life is an unimaginable mass of misery: it’s all the war, starvation, loss, alienation, depression, the sum of all of it, over 7 billion people. How can anyone be hopeful in the face of these miseries, especially when everyone knows they have contributed to them? We all make mistakes and we have all made someone else’s life worse, whether intentionally or not. We all make bad decisions, but we all try as best as we can not to. And yet we still find ways to enjoy life and be happy and say “everything is just fine.” Every one of those unimaginable sadnesses has a counterpart in happiness, and there is so much that is equally happy and beautiful that it is simultaneously difficult to imagine how one could not love life.

What jumps out about the verses most prominently is the constant contrast and duality. We will explore each of these in detail, but first let’s look at the chorus, which is where this duality is most fully realized.

And what it all comes down to Is that everything's gonna be fine, fine, fine 'Cause I've got one hand in my pocket And the other one is givin' a high five

Reserved but resolved. Afraid but brave. Having one hand in your pocket but giving a high five. Keeping one hand in your pocket is a metaphor for many things: reservation, fear, uncertainty, keeping close to yourself, individuality. To live is to know pain, and none of us chose to be born. Everyone is brave simply for living. How can you blame anyone for keeping one hand in their pocket? No one is fully sure of themselves, and everything they do is still with one hand in the pocket. There is no true confidence. Confidence is an act for the outside world to observe, but every mind is muddled with doubts. Our minds stop developing at around the age of 25, but our bodies age continually. Trapped in this arrested development, everyone essentially is living with the mind of a child but the body of an adult. There is a huge disconnect between your outward appearance or image to others and who you know to be to yourself. Everyone is putting on a bit of a show by “giving a high five” to their friends, while still remaining with a “hand in their pocket” to themselves. This high five belies the trepidation and uncertainty we all feel. We are in denial living a life trying to be happy, knowing we are inching closer to death and scared because of it.

So why is “everything gonna be fine”? Well, the hand in the pocket is to be expected, but it is amazing that we still do give high fives. Even though we can view living life as a denial of death, we can alternatively view giving a high five as a leap of faith and an act of love. We cannot live solely as individuals, and there would be no life without community. We can’t live if we have both hands in the pocket, and no one can truly take both hands out of the pocket, so the best we can do is to take one out. To have both hands in your pocket is to die and disintegrate and be absorbed by the Earth. To have both hands out of your pocket is to leave your body and transcend to the heavens. That’s why to be a human is to have one hand in your pocket and the other outside of it. If this doesn’t make sense yet, it will as we go through many examples during the analysis.

Throughout this entire song, Morissette’s hand is in her pocket, and other hand is always doing other things. Fear and sadness and stability are a constant throughout life; it’s always something that’s there and can’t change. However, because of time’s unstoppable move forward, you are forced to live life, so even though you always have a hand in the pocket, you always have another hand doing different things at different stages in life. And it is inspiring that even though life is sad, we all still somehow push through and live through it and find happiness.

And what it all comes down to Is that everything's gonna be quite alright 'Cause I've got one hand in my pocket And the other one is flickin' a cigarette

This is similar to the first chorus, but something changed. In the first chorus, “fine” and “five” rhymed (although imperfectly) while in this chorus “alright” and “cigarette” do not rhyme. This is the first sign that something is amiss. Although you might not have noticed, this song actually has a chronological progression. The song tracks the stages of a person’s life from innocence to disappointment to acceptance. In the first chorus, Morissette is still as excited and forward-looking as you would expect any child to be. Although the central message of the song is built into the chorus, Morissette is still confident that everything will be fine. Although Morissette is still maintaining that things will be alright, there is some doubt communicated by the lack of a rhyme with cigarette.

And what it all comes down to Is that I haven't got it all figured out just yet 'Cause I've got one hand in my pocket And the other one is givin' a peace sign

Now Morissette has changed the message. Instead of saying everything is gonna be fine, she says that she doesn’t have it all figured out yet. Why is this confidence supplanted by doubt? We again see that the chorus doesn’t rhyme. In fact, in a fittingly cruel irony, if Morissette did not change her mind and continued saying that things were gonna be fine, the chorus would have actually rhymed (and perfectly too). Interestingly enough, “yet” actually does rhyme with something we heard before: “cigarette.” In the previous chorus, Morissette was still innocent and excited but began having her doubts when she saw that not everything fit perfectly, and in her attempt to try to rectify the mismatch between “fine” and “cigarette” she changed her worldview from “everything is gonna be fine” to “I haven’t got it all figured out just yet” hoping that now her philosophy would be consistent with her experience. Furthermore, her new worldview that “I haven’t got it all figured out just yet” reflects the fact that the previous lack of rhyme was a signal that she actually doesn’t understand everything yet. Of course, this is all a metaphor for living life, being enthusiastic and having big dreams as a child, thinking that once you become an adult, you will have everything figured out, then growing up and being that adult and seeing you don’t have everything figured out and being afraid that maybe something is wrong with you. Of course, we all later realize that every adult is like this and really no one has it figured out, but that is what the next chorus directly address. This stage of life is the scariest and most difficult though. Your dreams have not been realized and you are not as carefree as you were as a child, and most of all, you are confused because life doesn’t make any sense. And the fact that you are confused is scary because this is your life, your one and only life, the life that you looked forward to as a kid and had so many dreams about, and now it’s yours, it’s in your hands, and you have no idea what to do with it. You are looking for that perfect answer, but you never find it, even though sometimes it feels like it’s barely eluding you (just like Morissette barely missed what would have been the only perfect rhyme in the song: “fine” and “sign”).

It’s also worth noting that “giving a peace sign” is different from giving a high five or flicking a cigarette. It is not just a mundane daily action, but a message of the most naïve optimism. Although this chorus represents what may be the lowest stage in a person’s life, Morissette’s action with her free hand is the most optimistic in the song. Perhaps this is denial, an act of strong outward positivity meant to counteract the inward fear. Or perhaps it is really an optimistic message in and of itself: even at our lowest lows we still hope for progress and we still care for others. It again conjures the central beauty of life: that in the face of so much sadness and disappointment, we can still find ways to love, forgive, and be happy.

And what it all boils down to Is that no one's really got it figured out just yet Well, I've got one hand in my pocket And the other one is playin' a piano

After the nadir, we now have the first sign of maturation. Morissette realizes that she is not the only lost soul populating Earth. Just like her, everyone doesn’t have it “figured out.” This realization is simultaneously alarming and relieving. It’s sad that life is just a bunch of people walking around pretending to be important when really everyone is lost and confused and humanity is a befuddled mess. But isn’t it nice to know you’re not alone? We are all in this together, and we can all comfort each other as we confront this truth of our nature. This realization is where the healing process can begin. Life is not what we thought it would be. It’s a mess, but armed with this new understanding that everyone is confused and that life is unfair, we can redefine what we understand about life and we can create new values and outlooks that are healthy and can actually lead us to happiness. This is what Morissette does in the next chorus.

It is also worth noting that the other hand in this chorus is playing a piano. We can assume she also had one hand in the pocket while composing this very song. This is a self-aware nod that Morissette cannot even claim full confidence over this song or any of her artistic work. Even as she spreads her life-affirming message of humility, there is a recognition that this song is no conclusive answer as such a thing can never exist.

And what it all comes down to my friends, yeah Is that everything is just fine, fine, fine 'Cause I've got one hand in my pocket And the other one is hailin' a taxi cab

To close the song, Morissette settles on “everything is just fine.” This is markedly different from “everything is gonna be just fine.” This outlook is an acceptance that things the way they are right now are good enough, and you don’t need to look towards the future to wait for when things will be fine. As kids, we all make the mistake of pinning our happiness to some conception of the future, and the eventual mismatch of expectation and reality makes us sad. Now after going through the development of hope followed by disappointment, Morissette has learned to accept what she has now because there is always so much to be happy about, even small things, like high fives.

It is worth noting that the last two verses do not rhyme at all. Attempts at rhyming are completely abandoned after Morissette was burned by trying to find some solution to life and failing. But the song is just as beautiful even without the rhymes. This is just like life, still beautiful despite its flaws.

“Hailing a taxi cab” at the end of the song could be interpreted as a metaphor for death, with the taxi cab taking you away from life. The last line before this chorus mentions that she is sick, perhaps meaning the narrator is close to death in the arc of the song.

Now let’s explore the lines of the verses. We have touched on a lot of themes in this opening analysis of the chorus, and all of these will be greatly elaborated upon in the analysis of the verses.

I’m broke, but I’m happy

How can someone be happy even though they are broke? Could it be because your material possessions are somewhat independent from your happiness? That is exactly true, and this song is certainly a rebuke of materialism. Material success (e.g. wealth, fame) is something only the minority of people know. This is by definition as material success is measured relative to others. For example, to be rich is to have more money than most people, meaning most people are not rich. But it’s not true that most people are unhappy. Happiness is not measured relative to others. It is also a well-studied fact of psychology that increasing your wealth past a certain point has no positive long-term effects on happiness. Furthermore, pursuing extrinsic goals (goals that are pursued for their material outcome) are much less likely to make you happy than pursuing an intrinsic goal (a goal that is pursued for the sake of the pursuit, e.g. developing a skill, raising a kid).

I’m poor, but I’m kind

The ability of humans to be kind to each other is one of humanity’s most important and beautiful qualities. Morissette might be poor, and others might be alone, disabled, sick, or anything else, but despite their neediness they can miraculously subvert their Darwinian individualistic instinct by being kind even though they may stand to gain something from being selfish. Why are there people like this? Why is the poor but kind person a stereotype? Why is there the dual stereotype of the rich but coldhearted person? Obviously there are exceptions to both of these stereotypes; they are merely stereotypes after all. There are plenty of great, kind, loving rich people and bad, selfish poor people. However, we know there is on average a difference between the two and this indicates some sort of pressure acting disproportionately on these two groups. One way this discrepancy arises is from the fact that people who are selfish and individualistic are more likely to become rich because they have more ways to become rich since being willing to do something at the expense of someone else gives more opportunities and paths to success for selfish people. It’s not their fault though. We should not be upset at selfish or coldhearted people. We must forgive them. Forgiveness is the central message of this song. Many of these dualities are forgivenesses: “I’m poor, but [I forgive that fact because] I’m kind.” Happiness itself is a forgiveness. To be happy even though life is sad, is to forgive life and to forgive humanity for its faults and still appreciate it for the good it has. The arc of the song even reads like a forgiveness: Life gave me hopes, it thwarted those hopes, but I learned to forgive it and be happy anyway. Selfish people are selfish because they’ve been led that way by life. Selfishness is baked into human DNA. Our brains make us think that success will make us happy. People who are selfish are lost in their own way, and in the fourth chorus, we realize that everyone is lost. Everyone has something wrong with them, and everyone is guilty, but it’s easy to sympathize with them because they were just trying to be happy. Therefore, everyone should ask for forgiveness from everyone, and everyone should forgive everyone.

I’m short, but I’m healthy, yeah

This is still the first verse of the song, or the childhood phase, and being short and healthy is characteristic of children as opposed to being sick, like in the final verse.

The first two lines dealt with one kind of materialism, money, but this line deals with another, appearance. Striving for a good appearance is another way life tricks us by infecting us with expectations that will likely disappoint us in the future. Our biology and society tell us to strive for a good appearance, but this is absurd because no one can actually control their own appearance. Many factors of your appearance are decided by DNA and impossible to change. Obviously there are many things you can do to improve your own appearance like grooming and exercise, but many of the most important factors really do come down to DNA. To use Morissette’s example, you can never change your own height, but this could immediately disqualify you from being a certain level of attractive. It is such a shame then that so many people end up staking happiness on appearance. We must all eventually learn to live with this as Morissette does in the fifth chorus. We must learn to forgive appearance and love life despite it. Ultimately, it’s material and extrinsic, and it’s not what truly makes one happy.

There is something that is closely tied to appearance but actually is a good idea to pursue: health (the subject of the second half of this lyric). Even though living healthy and getting exercise improves your appearance, it has some major differences from appearance. First of all, your health is in your control. There are things about your appearance you can never change, but almost everyone has the capability to drastically influence their health. (Of course, there are exceptions: for example, people with uncontrollable disorders or people who lack access to nutritious food.) The other important difference is that pursuing good health actually has a tangible positive physical effect. Unlike appearance, whose effects on you are ethereal and abstract, good health physically changes your brain chemistry to make you happier. Pursuing health is usually a good intrinsic goal. There’s a lot of parts of our biology that work against us to makes us sad in the long-term, so it only makes sense to leverage the parts of our biology that can make us happy.

It is interesting that there is this fine line between pursuing appearance and health. There are many of these fine lines all over life. For example, most of the Seven Deadly Sins all have counterparts across a thin line like this, e.g. Love / Lust, Sloth / Rest. It’s because all the good is mixed with all of the bad. That’s why many of the lyrics are inseparable opposites. One must always have one hand in their pocket and another outside.

I’m high, but I’m grounded

This can be translated to the Platonistic “I’m celestial, but I’m earthly.”

We are all necessarily grounded on Earth because of its gravitational pull. No matter how high we ever get in life, the gravity of Earth will always pull us down. Earth and life are inherently flawed. We won’t ever find perfect happiness or harmony. Everyone eventually gets to a peak early in life after which they are pulled back down and need to readjust expectations. As discussed with the choruses, it is impossible to take both hands out of your pocket, and it is also impossible to not be grounded. However, the ability to forgive and still be high while grounded is the beauty in life. Even though everything we do may be imperfect and half-hearted with one hand in our pocket, the fact that we still do keep that second hand out of our pocket despite all of the adverse pressures not to is what this song celebrates.

I’m sane, but I’m overwhelmed

This is very similar to the previous line. No matter how sane you are, you still don’t have it figured out just yet, and hence you will be overwhelmed.

An interesting thing to note is that the first three lyrics took the form of “I’m [negative thing], but I’m [positive thing]”; however, the order is reversed in these two lyrics. It turns out that no matter which angle you view it from, you will always find good and bad. Looking at a situation in a positive light, you will always find something bad about it, and vice versa. The good and the bad are inseparable in life, and sometimes it is ambiguous which is which. Furthermore, no matter what worldview you have, there will always be doubts and counterarguments. There is no satisfying answer to life, and there is nothing you could declare without there being a “but” that can follow it. It is inevitable that things will not work out perfectly and there will always be bad with the good, and this song is about acceptance of that fact.

I’m lost, but I’m hopeful, baby

This idea has already been discussed at this point in the analysis. It is explicitly stating some of the subtext of the choruses. To not be lost would be to have both hands out of the pocket while to lose hope would be to have both hands inside the pocket.

I feel drunk, but I’m sober

There are plenty of ways to feel drunk while being sober. Sleep deprivation, for example, can produce many drug-like effects. You could feel drunk any time something is causing your brain to process information differently and change your perceptions. The way you perceive the outside world physically changes during the brain development of the first 25 years of your life, but the transition is gradual because you cannot feel it in the moment. However, if you could skip back to the brain of your adolescent self for a few hours, the effect would be much like that of taking a drug. We also enter a different mode of perception every night through dreaming. The lack of consistency in our perception is part of why empiricist philosophers are so skeptical of the veracity of our perceptions. Two people can view the same thing entirely differently. We even often view the same thing differently from ourselves at a different point in time. In fact, at two different points in time you are effectively two different people. Why do we sometimes dislike a movie, then watch it later and love it? Life events can change your perspective by giving you new experiences. Watching a movie about a family might be an entirely different experience before and after having a kid. Having a kid can completely change the way you see life; it can change your reality. Meanwhile, your having a kid has no effect on others’ realities. Everybody’s reality is constantly in flux, and these realities clash with each other. Part of forgiving others is recognizing that they just have a different reality.

It is harder to tell what is reality when you are drunk. Your memory is bad, your thoughts intermingle with your perceptions and cloud your judgment. But even when you are sober, this is all still true, just to a lesser extent. Humans are notorious for faulty memories, and their thinking can be influenced by the outside world. Priming studies have shown, for example, that levels of selfishness can change among individuals depending on things like which room of the house they are in or which words they have seen recently, for completely subconscious reasons. Your mode of thinking can change just by seeing the word “family” without consciously knowing it. We are all always feeling drunk in a way because in this confusing world with our faulty perceptions, it’s hard to really tell what reality even is.

I’m young, and I’m underpaid

To be underpaid is to be undervalued. Everyone is undervalued by others to some extent. People see flaws in other people and value them less for it. What would it even mean to not be undervalued? To be valued at exactly what you are worth? People don’t have concrete values so this is an absurd proposition. The idea of valuing a person is another human fallacy that causes unhappiness. The idea of giving people concrete values is attractive because it is convenient and easy to understand. Humans make abstractions to simplify our views of the world to make it more digestible. Science is a wonderful example that has made the world feel less like a confusing mess. Tying your own worth to some concrete value, although easy to understand, leaves you susceptible to unhappiness due to mismatched expectations. Wanting a salary above a certain dollar amount or a certain number of followers on social media are easy goals to measure, but not obtaining them will make you unhappy, so you are just giving yourself a way to concretely measure that you are a failure, even though a single number cannot possible capture your worth. Goals are great to set and pursue, but your happiness should be staked on personal development through the pursuit of the goal, not a material end result.

This is the first lyric that uses “and” as its conjunction rather than “but.” As discussed before, the good and the bad are inseparable, so using “and” is just a more direct way of saying what’s been said in the previous lyrics. At this point, there is not much of a distinction.

I'm tired, but I'm working, yeah

This lyric and the previous one paint the image of someone who is still young and optimistic, working hard to achieve their goals. As discussed in our analysis of the choruses, the outlook of this person will be revised as the song progresses.

Doing work makes you tired, and the more tired you are, the less work you can do. Resting makes you less tired, but the more you rest, the less work you do. Finding the right balance between work and rest is a big struggle for humanity. Rest and work are both good, but doing either too much or too little is bad. This is another case in which humans are forced to have one hand in the pocket (rest) and one outside of it (work); however, instead of human nature being the driver of this dynamic, the laws of physics themselves actually make this necessary. It is not only true that humans get tired as they work. This is true of everything in nature; doing work requires energy, and energy is not unlimited. Having one hand in a pocket is not just a feature of humanity but a feature of nature itself.

I care, but I’m restless

To care is to want better, but often anything you do that has a positive effect also has a negative one. You cannot separate the good from the bad, so if you care about the good, you will inevitably be driven restless by trying to shoo away the bad. Pursuing perfection is a game of Whac-A-Mole. Even if you could in theory achieve perfection at some point, this perfection would all be undone by the progress of time which eventually destroys everything. To achieve perfection is to stop time. There is no perfection; it’s a law of nature.

I’m here, but I’m really gone

Who you were when you were a kid is gone; who you were five years ago is gone; who you were a year ago is gone; who you were last month is gone; and who you were a second ago is gone. It’s all gone, lost to the ether. The first time we heard this song, the person who wrote it was already gone. Each life is a beautiful flicker of a firefly in time. As Mark Eitzel writes in “Firefly,” “You're so pretty baby / You're the prettiest thing I know / You're so pretty baby / Where did you go?” All we really ever have is the present moment. Like this moment right now, this moment in which you are reading the ramblings of someone blogging about an Alanis Morissette song. Isn’t there something strange and beautiful about this moment? There will never be another one like it. Time forces one hand out of the pocket. It moves forward whether we consent or not, and it forces us to continue living life. The forward movement of time causes us to be hungry again, to be lonely again, and we have to act to satisfy these desires. There is nothing we can do besides placid acceptance. “Everything is just fine, fine, fine.”

I’m wrong, and I’m sorry, baby

And now we come to what is arguably the most important line of the song. Following the pattern of stating a positive along with a negative, we have “I’m wrong” (a negative) followed by “I’m sorry” (a positive). Humanity can be summed up with this line. Being wrong is universal. Nobody is infallible. In fact, most people are flawed in very conspicuous ways. Can you name anyone who is truly perfect? And if everyone you know is imperfect, then surely you are not the only perfect one, right? No, being wrong and being flawed is nothing to be ashamed of. We are all in this together; everyone is a bad person in a lot of ways. But humanity’s saving grace is that we are trying to be good. Everybody really does try. This lyric can be translated to “I’m bad, and I’m trying to be good.” No individual can escape the gravity of being bad, and this understanding is essentially to maturation. Morissette bravely leads the way by admitting she is wrong to us and asking for forgiveness. The proper response is for us to forgive her, admit that we are wrong too, and ask for forgiveness back.

The flip side to the fact that everyone is wrong is that everyone has been wronged. Many people are wronged in ways that can never be rectified. How can you forgive someone who has irrevocably wronged you? Only with the recognition that they have been irrevocably wronged as well. And if you still cannot forgive someone, I can forgive you for not being able to. In fact, we are all irrevocably wronged by nature itself. Time dispassionately and irreversibly takes away all of our loved ones from us (if it doesn’t take us first). Yet to not forgive time is madness and denial. Being wronged is nature. To be happy is to be happy despite being wronged. To be happy is to accept and forgive.

Most of all, people are wronged by themselves. Everyone thwarts their own potential and wastes parts of their limited life to some extent due to succumbing to temptations, bad judgment, and selfish motivations. We often willingly and knowingly wrong ourselves on top of everything else. We beat ourselves up over it because it was completely in our control. However, if this is something that happens to everyone, then maybe it’s time to stop thinking we have so much control. Of course, everyone should try to be the best they can, but with the healthy recognition that our brains work against us by design (e.g. catalyzing selfish actions, rewarding addictive behavior). Ultimately, the most important reason that we should, along with Morissette, admit we are wrong is not for others to forgive us, but for us to forgive ourselves. We should try to be as good as we can but understand that we will always be flawed. Learning to forgive others goes hand-in-hand with learning to forgive yourself. Others are a reflection of yourself, and we are all a reflection of human nature, a complex, beautiful, monstrous beast that gives us everything and also takes everything away. Forgive nature, forgive yourself, then be happy.

I’m free, but I’m focused

With the knowledge that our own natures often work against us, it’s clear to see that freedom is a double-edged sword. To have total freedom is to have freedom to engage in behaviors that destroy us. We are free to become addicted to drugs, sex, video games, gambling; we are free to neglect diet, hygiene, and exercise; we are free to not be productive and instead spend our time watching the same TV show over and over; we are free to isolate ourselves from others; we are free to abandon our families. Freedom affords many great advantages but also greatly widens the window of opportunity for failure. Freedom on its own is meaningless without focus or responsibility. Freedom is a tool that must be properly directed.

I’m green, but I’m wise

A kid can be smart for their age. They’re not really smart, but relative to other kids, they are smart. When we say an adult is smart, there is an implied “for a human” at the end of the statement because, let’s be honest, no one is really actually smart. Morissette says this herself: “No one really has it figured out just yet.” It makes sense for a kid to say “I’m green, but I’m wise for a kid,” and it equally makes sense for an adult to say “I’m green, but I’m wise for a human.”

It is also worth discussing that many of the descriptors used in this song are relative terms. There is no pure Platonic form of wisdom that we actually have to measure our own wisdom against to know how wise we really are in an absolute sense. When we say someone is wise, of course what we really mean is that they are wiser than the average person. Our idea of wisdom is based on how wise humans are, and what it means to be wise would change if everyone were collectively wiser. This is partly why it is so easy to claim you are two opposite things as Morissette does throughout the track. Since the meanings of these words are relative, their truth is not absolute and depends on what we compare against. Any person can have different levels of intelligence and experience in different areas. You could say “I’m green when it comes to relationships but wise when it comes to self-care” for example. But there is an interesting and universal example. Everyone is wise when it comes to knowing themselves and green when it comes to knowing others. Everyone has the utmost experience with being themselves and no experience with being a different person. To really understand what it means to be human is to sum the experience of every person and abstract out what is universal among them. However, the only lived experience anyone ever has is their own. Therefore, no individual can ever really know human nature. Every living person holds a different piece of the puzzle, and interchange is not physically possible.

I’m hard, but I’m friendly, baby

We all would love to be as friendly and open as possible, and let as many people into our lives as we can, but as we’ve already discussed, everyone is a bad person in some ways, so if you let yourself be too open to allow anyone in, you risk getting burned by someone’s bad side. Hence, we all have to be hard in some ways. There is also another tradeoff: the more open you are, the more people you become friends with, and the more friends you have, the less time you have to spend with each individual friend, meaning your relationships will be less close on average. Each person falls somewhere on the spectrum between hard and friendly. Your position within this range can influence whether you develop a few close relationships or a lot of less close relationships. Even with each individual friend you have, there is a tradeoff with how close you want to be with them. If you are not very close, you might not know them as well and hence run a higher risk of being burned by them, but since you are not so close, being burned is a lesser breach of trust than with a closer friend. However, a close friend has a lower risk of burning you since you’ve gotten to trust them enough to let them in, but since they are closer, the impact of them burning you is much more destructive. Therefore, keeping a small circle of close friends gives a low risk of a high cost while a large circle of less close friends gives a high risk of a low cost. Because of this dangerous dynamic, each person must selectively be hard to reserve trust and friendly to give trust for each relationship they maintain. To be completely hard would be to close off all contact from humanity, to effectively kill yourself; and to be completely friendly would be to allow yourself to be taken advantage of by anyone, to effectively allow someone else to kill you. A fully friendly figure, a Jesus or a Prince Myshkin, cannot be realized in humanity, as one would need to transcend their nature.

Many things in life are a necessary evil. Any action we take inadvertently introduces some poison into our body. Most of the food we eat is necessary for health, yet introduces trace amounts of what will eventually kill us. Making friends is necessary for mental health, yet also opens us to small poisons that may later kill us. Any action we take may eventually be the reason we die, and ultimately life is the cause of death.

I'm sad, but I'm laughing

Why do sad things sometimes make us laugh? Even though laughing usually makes us feel good, is there any reason why sad things can’t be funny? In fact, no, there isn’t and it is perfectly natural for many sad things to be funny. One of the most common reasons we find something funny is that it is unexpected. There are exceptions to this rule, but usually humans find unexpected things funny. Now, let’s consider what makes us sad. Often, the things that make us sad are also unexpected. Often sadness is the product of a mismatch between expectations and reality, as previously discussed. On the other hand, you are usually happy when reality meets your expectations, which is why we find happy situations funny much less often than sad situations. There is nothing funny or surprising about wanting a job and then getting the job. However, really wanting a job and then not getting it can be surprising and hence funny depending on the situation. Among your sad ruminations, at some point there might appear the self-aware recognition of how sad you are, how absurdly bad this situation is, and how things just did not go at all how you foresaw, and the surprise of it all is a little funny, even if the surprise is a sad one.

The act of being sad but laughing is also a perfectly natural reaction to the world at large. Sometimes there are ways in which the world seems too bad to be true. Sometimes it’s hard to believe how it’s even possible for humanity to have gotten itself into some situations. For example, it’s absurd that we have created weapons with enough force to destroy the world and now they are in control of a few individuals, even though we know all humans are fallible. There’s no kidding it’s sad, but it’s also such a strange, unbelievable situation that it’s also funny.

I'm brave, but I'm chickenshit

In this context, chickenshit means cowardly. But how can someone be brave and the opposite of brave at the same time? Plato observed that people can hold conflicting desires. For example, someone can desire to eat a burger because they are hungry, but simultaneously desire not to eat it because it is unhealthy. It’s not news that our mind has conflicting impulses and identities that lead to indecision or decisions we regret. (Plato separates the soul into three parts; Freud separates the psyche into id, ego, super-ego.) Therefore, we often harbor contradictory desires that not only confuse others but also confuse ourselves. It’s hard to pin down even what your own identity is. We’ve talked a lot about how life is sad, but it is also just confusing. Our decision-making apparatus is convoluted, hard to understand and hard to control, and after we make a decision, the feedback we get from life is often also convoluted and unclear, which prevents us from evaluating whether the decisions we made had a negative or positive effect. Furthermore, since we often harbor contradictory desires, we often voluntarily do things we don’t actually want to do, which is another way our biology works against us.

I believe to live is to be brave. Life is a crucible of pain, and each individual has their own intractably difficult problems to deal with. And then of course to be chickenshit in the face of these intractable problems is only natural.

I'm sick, but I'm pretty, baby

Everything is sick but pretty. Because of time, everything is temporary and constantly progressing closer to its end. Any time we witness beauty, whether it’s a person, a piece of art, or a flower, we were lucky because we caught that beauty in a moment when it still existed, a moment that was immediately lost to the ether. Every beauty we know will perish. Each person, intricately and uniquely developed after decades of life, eventually disappears completely. Ultimately, we are all sick but pretty. This fact is sad but happy. We can choose to be sad that one day we will die, or we can accept this fact and be happy that each passing moment is beautiful.

#alanis morissette #hand in my pocket

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thebiasrekkers · 4 years

Text

Touch In The Dark — MYG

For the @btswriterscorner - Amor Fabula Launch Project in celebration of the month of Valentine’s Day!

Plot: Min Yoongi comes from the prestigious family of Blue Blood lineage. However, to appear philanthropic in the eyes of the public, they volunteered their son to marry someone from “humble” origins. Two years have passed since he’s been married to his poor, orphan wife. But for the first time in two years, he’s starting to take note of things about her that are causing shifts in his views of her, shaking his heart.

Rating: PG-13 // SFW

Genre: dystopian!au/dystopian themes | angst | romance/fluff

Pairing: Min Yoongi x Female OC (Kiara Townsend)

Warnings: Strong language, mentions of suicide, extreme angst, interracial/intercultural relationship, arranged marriage

Links: FAQ || BTS Masterlist || Admin E’s AO3 || [ REQUESTS ARE OPEN ]

Word Count: 7,936

AN: I never thought I would write a story like this. I think this is the softest I’ve ever written for the boys. I know I only have one piece of lit for the fandom, but I have to say that this project caught me a little off guard. I never thought I would write Yoongi this soft, but it’s a very non-conventional soft. So I hope you all enjoy the world I was able to build from this, hug your loved ones a little close, and know that you are always loved. All reblogs, critiques/reviews, comments and affection are accepted! Happy reading!

© thebiasrekkers (Admin E). All rights reserved. Reposting/modifying our work is prohibited. Translations are not allowed. Plagiarism/stealing is not tolerated by any means. Legal action will be taken in instances of theft.

~ k.t. ~

On the day she was told that she’d been chosen as the “Charity Selection” for The Lottery, Kiara tried to kill herself.

The heavy knocks sounded like thunder inside her tiny, rundown studio apartment. She stared back at her reflection in the bathroom, a handful of sleeping pills clutched in her palm over the porcelain. She’d purchased a full bottle of the prescription strength medication off the black market. It took her months to save up enough money to buy them.

Attempted suicide was a serious offense, punishable by large fines and incarceration for three months, followed by six months of psychiatric evaluation. The global population was already off-kilter with how many people suffered losses from wars, hunger and poverty. Decreasing the numbers in any amount was detrimental to society’s ability to rebuild and stabilize its structure.

The knocking continued incessantly. Kiara knew if she didn’t answer the door, they would just kick it in and find out what she was up to. Sighing, she put the pills back into the bottle and placed it in the medicine chest behind the smudged mirror.

Twelve paces. That’s how long it took for her to make it from the bathroom to the front door. The ratty sofa doubled as her bed and the thin, pale blue blanket could hardly be considered covers. While Kiara did not get sick often, she could not stay warm during the winter months. Central heating was a luxury she couldn’t afford and space heaters were few and far between. The yellowing paint peeled off the walls and the stainless steel door knobs, once shiny and new, were now dull and gray from years of neglect.

When she opened the door, she was greeted by a man in a three-piece suit and two armed soldiers. He was an official from The Lottery office and he handed her a letter. He congratulated her, telling her how fortunate she was to have been chosen for the “Charity” portion of the Lottery. He explained that everything she needed to know about her future husband was in the envelope and that she could read it on the flight to meet him.

She’d never flown in an airplane before.

Kiara didn’t own much. All of her furniture were either hand-me-downs or things she found on the side of the road. Her clothes, what few she had, could all be stuffed into a single duffel bag. Her friends doted on her, telling her how lucky she was to have been chosen. They all pooled together and bought her a pretty sundress to wear since it was approaching Summer. Kiara promised to contact them whenever she was fully settled.

On the flight over, Kiara took a good look over the files she’d received.

Yoongi Min. 26. South Korean. Computer programmer. His home was Daegu and he still lived with his family, as per tradition in the country. He was fluent in English, which was a relief. He was definitely handsome - dark auburn hair, pierced ears, and umber eyes that almost appeared a little withdrawn. Or was it sadness?

Was he hurting on the inside too?

At her request, one of the flight attendants gave her a tablet for her to study. She didn’t want to embarrass herself on the first day of meeting him.

If the plane didn’t crash on the way. Kiara could only be so lucky.

Yoongi wasn’t the one who picked her up from the airport. It was someone from the family’s household staff. He was a kind looking middle-aged man and he helped her load what few belongings she had into the trunk of her car. The drive from Incheon to Daegu was long. The driver, Mr. Song, told her she could take a nap if she liked. But there were so many questions she wanted to ask and she was grateful that he was also fluent in English.

There were things she discovered about Yoongi that she felt she could relate to. He was an avid reader and enjoyed music. He preferred his solitude and when he had the time to spare, he took pictures and tended the garden at his family’s home. There were servants to handle such things as yardwork, but Yoongi insisted on raising seedlings in a greenhouse.

After she arrived at his family’s home, she was welcomed by the rest of the staff. Yoongi, again, did not greet her. His parents did, however. They were not so fluent in English, but they were kind enough to allow one of the maidservants to translate what they were saying to Kiara. She both nodded and shook her head at the appropriate questions. Nothing they asked was outside of a “yes” or “no” response.

“Are you healthy?”

“Are your parents really dead?”

“Were you comfortable on the plane?”

“You’ve never flown on an airplane before, have you?”

And finally, the question that served as Divine Intervention.

“Are you tired?”

The questioning ended when she nodded. It wasn’t that Kiara wanted to avoid her future In-Laws. She really was tired. She refused to nap on the long drive from Incheon to Daegu and the jet lag was starting to rear its ugly head. She could hardly keep her eyes open. After she was escorted to one of the guest rooms, Kiara barely took note of her luggage on the floor at the foot of the bed.

She fell asleep almost immediately.

When Kiara awoke the next day, she found a handwritten note sitting on the nightstand. Groggy and hungry, she did her best to read the note. Her eyes quickly focused when she realized it was from Yoongi.

Miss Townsend,

I’m glad to see you arrived safely. I know this is a bit of a transition for you, but everything will be fine. I will be out of town on business until the day after tomorrow. Please meet me at City Hall on Wednesday so we can finalize everything.

~ Min Yoongi

Unsure of why, Kiara felt her heart sink. The note seemed so impersonal; business-like. She knew what kind of world they lived in now, but did it really mean that a perpetual wall would exist between them?

Crumpling the note in her hand, she was grateful to be alone. She didn’t think she’d be able to explain the tears if anyone saw her. Mostly because Kiara, herself, couldn’t understand why she was crying.

~ m.y. ~

The days always began the same.

Yoongi woke up, showered, went downstairs and had his cup of coffee. Two spoonfuls of sugar. No cream. He hated watching television because most channels either rattled on political propaganda or spoke about the “Runners” rebelling against society’s standards for the world. He preferred the soft sounds of jazz peeling from the radio speakers. Sometimes it was purely instrumental. Other times, someone was crooning a song about heartbreak. It was an idea that he didn’t quite understand, but the tones were pleasing to the ears.

He wasn’t a fan of it originally. Yoongi only listened to it because she had it playing while she hung laundry out on the line one warm summer day. “Killing Me Softly” droned from the speakers and he could recall the look on her face when he told her to turn it off immediately. Music containing lyrics had been banned as it was a way for artists to spread their messages of love, freedom, insurrection and justice.

She didn’t argue with him, but her expression shifted significantly that day.

In their society, love was something that could not be felt because love equaled passion and passion led to impractical thought. Impractical thoughts led to irrational decisions being made. Wars, hatred, violence: they were all ingredients for disaster that nearly wiped out the population of the world.

But mankind couldn’t very well lead itself to extinction. Population growth was necessary, so long as it was monitored and controlled. Maintaining order was paramount in this new age. The Lottery Bill was established across the world - bridging the racial and cultural divide that continued to exist until the United Nations took matters into their own hands.

The class system was determined by lottery. Blue Bloods all the way to Laborers. Everyone had their place and would accept that place. No one would strive to reach above their station as that would disrupt order and breed chaos. To regulate the classes, lotteries were also pulled for marriage. Couples were chosen from like classes to maintain balance in the system.

But because the world’s government was not cruel, there were families chosen to participate in philanthropic activities. Every year, a small percentage of Laborers were pooled to marry into Blue Blood lineage. It was a way to show the kindness the global governmental body possessed. Most in the Blue Blood class referred to it as “Forced Charity” but they couldn’t argue against the positive impact it had both across the media and in society as a whole.

Min Yoongi’s family was one of the families chosen to participate in the “Forced Charity”. As the only son, he was obligated to be the one to represent their family during The Lottery.

He didn’t make a fuss. When Yoongi received his Summons in the mail, he went to his district’s City Hall and took the envelope from one of the clerks. He had one week to accept the terms presented in his drawing. Since he was willingly volunteering to marry someone outside of his station, he had one opportunity for a redrawing. But only one.

Yoongi opted out of it.

He was living with his parents still and politely asked that they give him privacy. For five days they tormented him about what his bride was like. It wasn’t out of childish rebellion that he hadn’t given them an answer. It was because he truly didn’t know.

On the sixth day, he finally opened the envelope.

Inside contained the dossier of his future bride, as well as a single photograph. Everyone who was eligible for The Lottery was required to have their picture taken at their district’s City Hall, regardless of what part of the world they were from. If his bride-to-be had to travel miles to get to him, then that was what had to be done. There would be no objections from either side.

He had no expectations. There was no reason to disagree with the marriage. Yet a part of him hesitated when it was time to call The Lottery office to have them send for her. The same part that looked at her picture and couldn’t help wondering what she was thinking when she was staring back at the camera. Yoongi wondered if he had the same expression on his face when he’d taken his photo.

Kiara Townsend. 26. African-American, German and Scottish. She had no parents and she worked full-time in a textile factory in North America. Her parents were killed during a neighborhood raid of residents who were presumed to have been involved in an underground movement of sorts - advocating free love and speaking out against the societal norms currently in place for the world.

In the photo, her skin was a golden caramel, hair thick with large curls, and she had prominent brows and a set of full lips. Her eyes, small and hazel in tone, were seemingly endless - like she could see into the very souls of anyone she laid her eyes upon. But there was an emptiness that lingered there in her photo.

After accepting his lottery choice, she was notified and escorted to his home country of South Korea. In three days, they were married. As a wedding present, his parents bought them their own home - a large estate in the Daegu countryside where they would have privacy. She no longer had to work now that she was married to a Blue Blood. Yoongi worked from home as a computer programmer and only went into town once a month for board meetings.

For the first month, neither of them said a word to each other. It was an unspoken rule that they had their own separate spaces in their home. Yoongi rarely slept and when he did, he slept alone. His wife often slept on the couch and he never bothered her to sleep in her own bed.

They were like strangers who happened to share the same address.

Four months went by. Yoongi grew more and more numb to his situation. The whole point of marrying someone was to increase the population. Young men and women were fully educated in the concept of sexual intercourse so that there would be no mistakes during the coupling process. No one was truly a virgin when they were age-appropriate for The Lottery. Sex was no longer an act of pleasure in the world. It was a business transaction.

They didn’t have sex. Neither even so much as touched the other.

Six months into their marriage, Yoongi heard Kiara speak for the first time.

“Can we send the servants home? I want to make dinner tonight.”

The sound of her voice was so soft. He was entranced and nearly forgot to speak. When Yoongi finally found his voice, he replied - realizing that his own tones sounded a little strange to him.

“Alright.”

~ k.t. ~

She hadn’t meant to be silent. There were so many things she wanted to know about her husband. But the very air around him appeared frigid and Kiara knew she didn’t want to bother him. There was a part of her that could sense his loneliness, but she never wanted to push or prod where she wasn’t wanted. The interactions they had between each other were brief, if even at all.

Kiara didn’t have to want for anything. But was this really a life that she could grow accustomed to? It felt like the more she wanted to grow closer with Yoongi, the further he seemed to appear.

Did he hate her? Or not care about her? When he fussed at her about playing the radio, she wondered if she was simply an eyesore to him.

Wasn’t it better to simply stay out of his way?

The months bled on and while they were finally sharing small bits of conversation here and there, Kiara could sense the gap between them slowly transforming into a chasm. There were times when she caught him looking at her when she was busying herself around the kitchen or even putting away clothes. She was so used to a hard, springy mattress from her pullout bed in her studio that Kiara found it easy to fall asleep on one of the many couches throughout the house.

Their house.

But was it really her house? Could she call it her home?

Eight months into their marriage, she woke up in a bed after having fallen asleep while reading on the sofa. The warm blankets and plush down startled Kiara, causing her to halfway scramble from the bed. The room was unfamiliar to her and she felt slightly trapped. Most people would be elated to wake up in a room with pristine, painted walls, an elegant vanity table, and clean blankets and pillows. It was warm and inviting, something that Kiara saw in the pages of magazines. She never dreamed she would be able to sleep in a room like this. It was part of the reason why she couldn’t bring herself to do it in the first place.

Who could have brought her there? One of the servants, maybe?

Sighing, she took a moment to study the room she was in - the room that was designated as “hers”. It was as unfamiliar to her as the day she first set foot in this country. While Kiara understood the language and continued to learn the customs and culture of South Korea, there was a part of her that still felt strangely out of place. It shouldn’t have been the case, not with The Lottery Bill having been in effect for several years now.

Only when her raging heartbeat slowed down a measure, did she notice the small note resting on the nightstand. With slightly trembling fingers, Kiara picked up the note and read it.

Stop sleeping on the couch. There’s a perfectly good bed not being put to use.

You don’t have to make yourself uncomfortable for no reason.

Haven’t you suffered enough in your life?

~ Yoongi

A warm feeling slowly blanketed her entire body. Kiara pressed the note to her chest as she sat on the edge of the bed. She wasn’t sure how she was supposed to feel. Relief? Understanding? Perhaps. Maybe even a little hopeful.

There was the faint aroma of spices permeating into her room from the gap below the door. Setting the note down, Kiara left her room and made her way out into the hallway. The stairwell was just a few feet away, but she paused in front of Yoongi’s bedroom. Her eyes lingered a little further to the third door at the other end of the hallway - the master bedroom. It seemed that Yoongi opted to stay in a guest bedroom just like hers.

Was that out of concern for her? Did he not want to appear entitled?

But that didn’t make any sense. He was a Blue Blood. His very lineage was entitlement, wasn’t it?

So then...why?

Her palm slid along the railing of the stairwell, her bare feet gliding over the perfectly polished wooden floor. She could hear a pot boiling as someone chopped methodically in the kitchen. When she reached the entrance, Kiara peeked her head around the corner. She felt like a small child stumbling across their parent in the middle of some adult task.

Yoongi was focused on chopping vegetables for a stew. The meat was already fully cooked in the broth and he appeared to be putting the final touches on what he was doing. Kiara gazed at his exposed forearms in awe - watching the muscles tensing as he worked. Her eye-line shifted, roving over the curve of his shoulders to the juncture of his slender neck. Sweat gathered around his temple and trailed down his jawline and with each movement, she saw his earrings twinking under the kitchen’s amber light fixture.

She couldn’t recall a time when she’d seen a man as beautiful as her husband.

As if he’d sensed her presence, Yoongi craned his neck to look at her - his arms moving to slide the vegetables off the carving board and into the stew pot. He turned the burner down while setting the chopping board into the sink. Washing his hands, he then wiped them clean with a dish towel as he leaned against the kitchen counter.

“Did you sleep well?”

Kiara nodded. “I did, thank you.”

“Good.”

There was a pregnant pause that seemed to stretch towards the edge of forever. Just as Kiara took a step forward, preparing to offer some kind of assistance, did Yoongi finally break the silence.

“I dismissed the servants,” he offered gently, his gaze meeting hers for what she felt like was the very first time since they were married, “it’s not like they really have much to do around here.”

Kiara didn’t know what to say, so she remained silent. Unconsciously, she began wringing her hands together. She very nearly averted her gaze until he spoke again.

“I’ll probably send them back to my parents’ home.”

Again, her eyes locked with his. His expression stayed neutral and Kiara felt a lump forming in her throat.

“Would it be okay if it was just the two of us?”

Her eyes widened slightly, unsure of what he was implying. But it was true that the servants didn’t have much to do in their home. Yoongi hardly made a mess and what mess he did make, he often cleaned up after himself. The same could be said of Kiara. If anything, the servants were often shuffling around and attempting to find something to do so they didn’t appear to have idle hands.

Surely they could take care of themselves, right?

Kiara didn’t know what expression to make, so she kept her face from shifting too much. Maybe it was out of need to keep herself just a little more guarded because of the lack of interaction for so long. She couldn’t be sure. But appearing too vulnerable, too open, could be just as much of a mistake as being too closed off.

Taking a breath, she nodded once more.

“If you’re alright with it, then I would like that, too.”

~ m.y. ~

He didn’t shower her with gifts because of an impulsive decision.

He bought her things because he knew she chose to go without.

Kiara came from a world that was vastly different than his own. Yoongi could hardly fathom the idea of not having enough clothes in his closet or enough food in his fridge. But she never complained about anything - whether he bought too much or not enough. She graciously accepted everything that was given.

What was even more puzzling, however, was how a mild feeling of irritation blossomed when Kiara didn’t utilize the things he’d given her immediately. He knew she was grateful and she rarely made a fuss about anything. The one time he ever saw her upset in the entire year they’d been married was when he’d made the comment about the radio.

Hadn’t they reached a compromise?

Biting his lower lip, he found it difficult to focus on his computer work. Everything looked like Egyptian hieroglyphics, which was saying something considering that Yoongi lived, breathed, and dreamed about coding. He became a computer software programmer out of necessity for the ever-advancing world of technology they lived in. Modern society was growing more and more dependent on smart devices, which would have been a shame had he lived in a different world.

People often missed the world around them when their eyes were glued to a screen.

The latch unhooked from the door, causing him to shift his gaze from the computer monitor. When it slowly opened, he saw Kiara quietly enter - arms cradling a small serving tray. Yoongi leaned back in his chair, threading his fingers through each other as she approached. She set a plate of toast, jam, and fruit on the desk - her motions smooth and practiced. She finally set the cup of steaming hot coffee beside the plate, as well as utensils wrapped in a cloth napkin.

“You should take a break,” she said, the tray resting against her stomach, “you’ve been working non-stop for about four hours now.”

He set the computer to hibernation mode. “I didn’t realize I’d been here that long.”

“You can leave the tray outside when you’re finished.”

Yoongi watched her turn to leave, his body reacting before his mind could process what he was doing. Before he realized it, he was out of his chair and reaching out to grasp her shoulder - stopping Kiara from leaving him. He felt her muscles tensing and Yoongi pulled his hand back immediately. Slowly, she turned to face him again.

Her hazel eyes appeared to glow from the twilight rays peeling in through the windows of his office.

His heart crashed into his chest with heavy thuds. A lump slowly formed in his throat and he made a vain attempt to swallow oxygen through the closing airways. Yoongi knew he wanted to say something, but he wasn’t sure what that something was. He opened his mouth to speak and, again, no words came out.

All he could do was push the bubble in his throat down into the knot twisting in his chest.

Sensing something was amiss, Kiara set the tray down on the desk. “Are you alright?”

Yoongi remained silent, studying the crease on her brow as her curls bounced around cheeks and shoulders. She reached her hand up, pressing the flat of her palm on his forehead.

“You’re a little warm, but you don’t seem to have a fever.”

Every representation of logic was screaming at him to pull away - telling him to replace the wall that existed between them for the last year. She hadn’t moved her hand from his skin and Yoongi felt his vision swimming for half a second before refocusing back on her face.

How had he missed the beauty mark at the corner of her left eye?

Taking a step back, he watched her arm continue to hover in the air for a few seconds before settling back at her side. Yoongi saw something pass over her face, but it was so quick that he wasn’t sure he’d seen anything at all.

Kiara brushed some of her curls behind her ear. “I’ll head to the market and pick up a few things. Don’t worry about the dishes. I’ll take care of them when I come back.”

Then she turned away from him to head out of his study, leaving him alone without so much as a second glance.

His chest hurt.

Flopping back into his chair, Yoongi carded his fingers through his hair in frustration - hands resting at the back of his neck as he stared blankly at the ceiling.

“...I didn’t even thank her.”

~ k.t. ~

The months were getting colder. Kiara wasn’t a fan of the cold, but she loved seeing the snow in South Korea. Everything was covered in a soft blanket of white. It gave her an excuse to indulge in a savory meal, wrap up in a warm blanket, and read by the fireplace. Yoongi was in Seoul for a business meeting, leaving her alone to her own devices. This was the first winter that she would get to experience without the servants around, fussing over her in case she hadn’t acclimated to the weather.

She took a warm bath, drank from a large glass of wine, and enjoyed the book she’d discovered near the back of the library. Most of the books in Yoongi’s library were reference books and non-fiction. She’d combed through most of them. But nestled in the very back, tucked away in a hidden nook, was a small collection of fictional literature. There were more than a dozen; small in comparison to the rest of his library. But the discovery of it surprised her just the same. In the year she’d been married to Yoongi, he always seemed very “by the book” and she couldn’t forget the comment he made about the music she was listening to while hanging up laundry. Finding something of this caliber was like stumbling across buried treasure.

Kiara was currently flipping through the pages of Animal Farm by George Orwell. She chose it because next to 1984 , it had the most worn out spine. It meant that Yoongi read it the most in comparison to the others in his entire collection.

Upon completing the novel, she could see why.

Politics. Justice. Equality. Inequality. A corrupt system. Broken families. Broken societies. A dream that fizzled away to greed - a dream that would only remain a dream so long as dictators felt that “some were more equal than others”.

There was a small part of Kiara that almost seemed to understand Yoongi a little bit better. He was a thinker and also compassionate. He never asked her to do more than what she needed and he readily provided her with anything she would ever need. It was the sort of life that Kiara wasn’t used to for over twenty years of being part of the Labor Class.

Yet something was still missing…

The sudden slamming of the door startled Kiara, causing her to drop the book into the bathwater. She panicked, knocking over the wine glass as she flailed to pull the book out. The pages instantly soaked - some of them were already falling out from the binding. She released a sob while pulling the plug to drain the water, clambering haphazardly out of the tub. Her heel found the bath rug by the tub and she could only cling helplessly to the pages, gathering up what remained in the bathtub into her trembling hands.

There was a knock at the door and she whirled around to face it.

“Is everything alright in there?”

Yoongi was home early. Looking at the ruined book in her hands, Kiara’s heart sank.

“I-I’m fine,” she said, leaning down to pick up the wine glass, “I’ll be out in just a moment.”

“Take your time.”

When she heard his footsteps fading away, Kiara sighed as she wrapped a towel around her body. She used a smaller one to clean up the mess on the floor - grabbing a small plastic bowl and filling it with water so she could wash what remained to let it drain out in the center of the bathroom. She let out another sigh, brushing her fingers through her wet curls. It was better to be honest and get it over with, wasn’t it?

Drying herself off, she slid into her pajamas, grabbed the ruined book, and made her way downstairs. Yoongi poured himself a drink in the kitchen, taking note of her presence with a simple nod. He held the glass up and out toward her.

“Drink?”

She shook her head. “No, I’m fine. I had some wine earlier.”

“Ah, I see,” he replied gently, replacing the cap on the whiskey bottle.

There was a small measure of silence that stretched between them and she shifted uncomfortably under his gaze, her fingers digging into the wet pages of the book currently hidden behind her back.

“Uh, Yoongi?”

He hummed during mid-sip, swallowing and then setting the glass down. “Yes?”

Slowly, she pulled the book around from behind her and held it out to him from across the kitchen island. “I was reading and dropped one of your books in the bath.”

“It’s just a book,” Yoongi said with a shrug.

Kiara bit her lower lip, her hands shaking as she continued to hold the book out to him - waiting for him to take it from her. He looked like he was about to say something, but she noticed his eyes lingering over the cover. When his eyes scanned over it, they widened slightly and it took everything Kiara had not to wince. Her shoulders visibly tensed when he snatched the book from her hands.

Without another word, he left the kitchen. Kiara followed on instinct, her eyes widening when she saw him throwing the book into the open hearth. The flames seemed to fight against the wet pages, but it didn’t take long for the book to burn.

“I’m sor--”

Yoongi was already moving, his body disappearing down the corridor. Her legs were rooted where she stood and Kiara wanted nothing more than to disappear between the cracks - to dip below the earth and vanish into the ether. She could hear his hurried steps and the breath left her lungs when she saw him carrying an armful of books.

Books from his hidden collection.

He moved faster than her brain could keep up and by the time she realized what was happening, he’d already thrown three more books into the fire.

“Yoongi, wait!” she cried, running toward him and pulling at his shirt sleeve, “Please wait! I said I was sorry! I didn’t mean to!”

Yoongi said nothing. He simply continued to throw the books into the fire. When all of those were devoured by the flames in the fireplace, he turned to head back toward the library. Kiara ran at him, wrapping her arms around his waist to stop him. He took three more steps before stopping completely.

She openly sobbed into his back, soaking his shirt as her fingers dug into his stomach to keep him tethered there.

“I’m sorry,” she repeated, clinging to him as if he was a life raft, “I’m sorry…”

She felt the flutter of his beating heart against her face, drumming along her cheeks. It almost seemed manic, but his shoulders finally relaxed as she heard him taking several long, deep breaths. The flames popped and crackled in the fireplace, having had its fill from Yoongi’s literature collection. She knew there were still a few more on the shelf in his hidden nook, but Kiara didn’t think she could handle him destroying the things he clearly seemed to care so much about.

“I haven’t read those books in years,” he murmured gently, “I should have gotten rid of them a long time ago.”

Her hands slid up his chest, curling so that her fingers could slip over the curve of his shoulders. Kiara took a breath, sighing through the scent of his cologne.

“But why?”

“Because they’re dangerous. They provoke dangerous thoughts.” He paused and she lifted her face in time to see his head turning slightly. “It’s why they’ve been banned.”

“They’re precious to you, aren’t they?”

“It’s not worth keeping them if they get you into trouble.”

Taking a step back, she blinked and he turned around to face her.

“Me?”

Yoongi nodded. “You’re so curious. I should have known that you would stumble across them eventually. But it’s just like with the music. You have to be careful.”

Kiara wasn’t quite sure what he meant, but she knew could tell that he wasn’t upset about her reading his books. He was upset that she had unknowingly placed herself into danger. He was concerned for her well being.

And that meant something to her. More than she would ever admit out loud.

Averting her gaze, she lowered her head slightly. “...I’m sorry.”

“And stop apologizing,” Yoongi said, an edge in his tone, “it frustrates me.”

She felt his hands around her shoulders, gripping them tightly. He looked like he was going to shake her, but thought better of it. Instead, he loosened his hold - letting his hands continue to rest on her shoulders. When she next looked up at him, his brows were furrowed and his pupils seemed to shake. She wasn’t sure what was still bothering him. Kiara wanted to know what she could do to make him feel less agitated.

But as she opened her mouth to speak, she lost all words of comfort as Yoongi leaned down toward her face. She was almost positive that her heart either skipped a beat or stopped altogether at that moment. Everything was so quiet. Kiara felt his breath dancing gently over her face as he pressed his cheek against hers, his lips brushing over her cheek.

Kiara was afraid to breathe, believing that the moment she did, it would shatter whatever dream-like illusion she was currently experiencing. The second she heard her own heartbeat pounding in her ears, however, was when Yoongi pulled away. Blinking up at him rapidly, she was sure that her cheeks were inflamed and her hand absentmindedly went to touch her cheek as his hands slid away from her shoulders.

“...don’t stay up too late,” he said gently.

And then, just like a mirage, he quietly turned away and made his way toward the stairs. When she heard the door to his bedroom shut, she finally collapse to her knees. Kiara’s breathing came out in rushed waves and she buried her face in her hands, stifling a sob that nearly broke through the silence. She wasn’t sure if she should feel elated or devastated.

What was happening between them now?

~ m.y. ~

It had been three months since he burned his private book collection. The more innocent and bright-eyed side from his youth mourned the loss of the texts. He could always purchase them again if need be. He wasn’t exactly hurting for money. But it was the worn edges of the books, the notes he’d made in the margins, that he could never get back.

Those would be lost forever.

It’s probably for the best, he thought, sighing as he cradled his cup of coffee in his hands, the lessons have been learned .

He watched the sun setting slowly over the horizon from his back patio. He reflected back to Kiara’s face when he’d torched his books. She’d called them “precious” and she wasn’t exactly wrong. But she wasn’t completely right either.

There were more important things in life than the words on the pages of books. He wanted to be able to tell her that himself, but Yoongi found he couldn’t. He didn’t think the words he had swirling around his head would be enough to get his message across.

Or maybe she already understood…

He turned to head back inside, closing the sliding glass door behind him. He peered around the main living area, absentmindedly wondering where his wife was. It was still early. Maybe she was still asleep.

As Yoongi moved toward the kitchen, the distinct sound of typing could be heard down the hallway. Blinking, he set his cup down and slowly trudged down the corridor leading to his office. He slowly turned the knob, opening the door to peek inside.

Kiara was rapidly typing at his desk, her eyes focused but clearly tired. Every few minutes, she would stop to roughly hit the tops of her shoulders, rolling her neck to loosen whatever knots were beginning to form there. His eyes wandered to the desk where there was a large stack of papers. Bundles were separated and stacked in varying directions so that there would be no confusion as to what stack belonged with which grouping.

His printer whirred to life, shooting out page after page of whatever she’d just finished. When the next bundle was complete, Kiara pulled out a pencil and began to write on pages as she sifted through them.

She hadn’t noticed him yet.

“What are you doing?”

His voice clearly startled her, nearly causing her to drop the entire packet of paper she had in her hands. Yoongi closed the door behind him, approaching the desk and reaching out for the bundle of papers at the very top of the stack. Kiara made a noise of protest, but his eyes scanned the front curiously.

Then his curiosity gave way to surprise.

“This is…” he began, but realized he couldn’t finish as his eyes landed on the next bundle’s cover page.

Animal Farm by George Orwell.

Yoongi rapidly flipped through the pages of 1984 in his hands. It was written, word-for-word, from what he could remember of the book. The most shocking discovery, however, was seeing his own handwriting along the margins of the pages where he’d taken his own personal notes and written rhetorical questions to ask himself as he read. It was almost too much for him to take in.

Lowering the manuscript at his side, he looked up as Kiara stood from his chair.

“I felt terrible about you destroying them,” she began, holding her hands up, “and don’t worry! I made sure that there aren’t any digital copies on your computer. Every time I finished one, I would print and delete it right away.”

He said nothing. He just continued to look at her; flabbergasted.

“You have photographic memory.” It was a statement of fact, not a question.

Kiara nodded.

“You even put all of my notes back.”

Again, she nodded.

His eyes wandered back to the large stack of papers. If it was separated by novels, then there were at least twenty books in the stack. Maybe more. And if she was taking the time to recreate his own scribbles, who knew how long this was actually going to take; how long she’d already been taking?

Is this what she’s been working on for the last month?

The ream of paper slipped from his hand and fluttered to the floor. Kiara gasped, rushing around the desk in a hurry to pick up the discarded pages. He stopped her before she could kneel to the floor, his hand grasping her upper arm to keep her standing. She looked at him with wide eyes and she tried to take a step away from him. But Yoongi held fast, refusing to let her move even an inch away from her.

“...thank you,” he whispered softly.

He felt what tension remained in Kiara start to ebb away.

And then she smiled. It was the first time he’d ever seen her smile and it hurt to even look at her. But Yoongi continued to stare at the curve of her lips and the way they turned upward. Her hazel eyes seemed to glitter against the twilight sky pouring in from his office window - the corners crinkling up just a little in response to the smile. He didn’t think it was possible, but Yoongi swore he could hear the sound of his heart breaking and reforming simultaneously. Suddenly, it was difficult for him to breathe, but he tried anyway. It felt like tiny needles were stabbing into the organ beating furiously against his chest, threatening to burst free and fall to the floor.

The logical side of his head, the one screaming at him to run out of the office and as far away from Kiara as humanly possible, was losing against the side that Yoongi didn’t even recognize. Like a time lapse, he watched their life together zip through his mind’s eye - a grainy film projection that continuously focused on every facet of Kiara that he could remember. Everything from big to small - a simple gesture and an even simpler question.

Nothing could compare to the sheer radiance that resulted in her smile.

In that moment, Yoongi knew that he wanted nothing more than to see her smile again. To see it past today and to watch her smile every single day after this one.

He would ask for forgiveness later. He wasn’t about to ask for permission. Not now.

Tugging his arm back, he pulled Kiara close to him. Her chest crashed into his, causing them both to stumble a single step forward and backward respectfully. Her smile disappeared, replaced with confusion. He watched her brows furrow and just as her mouth opened to speak, Yoongi leaned his face in - sealing his lips over hers in a rough kiss.

They both inhaled slowly and he could feel Kiara’s hands grasping at his shoulders. But she didn’t fight him. Instead, he could feel the heavy thud of her own heartbeat attempting to chase the cadence of his. Wrapping his free arm around her waist, he tried to pull her even closer. The smell of her shampoo, her subtle body spray, and how warm and smooth her skin was beneath his touch was almost too much. He feverishly kissed her, nipping and tugging at her full lips which would be swollen from his affection.

Darkness enveloped the sky, plunging them into darkness. The only light in the room came from the computer monitor, reflecting its light against the large bookshelf behind the desk. He pulled away from Kiara’s mouth, his eyes adjusting to the dark quickly as they both took the time to catch their breaths.

“Y-Yoongi,” she stammered, her body trembling slightly in his arms.

“I know what this is.” His voice was low, his breath dancing along her skin as he curled his fingers into the flare of her hip. “This is a problem.”

Even in the dark, he could see Kiara’s worried expression. She wasn’t a fool. She knew what this was just as well as he did. And just like him, she also knew how much of a problem this was.

But it was too late to turn back now.

“I didn’t want to fall in love. I didn’t.” Yoongi lifted one hand up to brush a few of her curls away from her face, resting his palm against her cheek so he could tilt her face further upward. “But then you smiled, and that was the end of everything for me.”

Even as he continued speaking, Yoongi could feel the panic creeping up his throat, threatening to choke the very life out of him. He’d heard of things like this happening in the past, years before he was born. When marriage was a choice made between two people who loved each other. It wasn’t something to be pulled from a Lottery.

When loving someone was a gift, not a crime.

A crime or not, Yoongi wanted to know. No. He had to know.

“Do you love me?”

And like he’d struck something buried deep at the core of her, Yoongi watched Kiara’s eyes fill with tears. They streamed down her face endlessly. For a brief second, he believed he’d hurt her feelings; that he’d done something irreparable.

But then, just like before, Kiara smiled up at him. He felt her hand brushing over his face, her nails lightly scraping over his jawline and resting at the edge of his chin.

“I do,” she replied gently while nodding, “I love you, Min Yoongi.”

Unable to hold himself back, Yoongi kissed her again - their arms entangling themselves with one another. The need to continuously press and touch, to physically express everything they’d collected inside of themselves all this time, was overwhelming. But he couldn’t stop wanting her; wanting the woman he’d come to love little by little every single day and he hadn’t even realized it.

But they couldn’t stay like this forever.

They both pulled away to reclaim the air they’d stolen from one another, catching their breaths momentarily. He could feel Kiara’s ability to hold herself up beginning to wane. Slowly, he lowered them both to the floor - pulling her into his lap so he could cradle her against him. He took comfort in the feel of her arms around his neck, pulling him close so that he could rest his face against the juncture of her neck.

She smelled so good.

“We can’t stay here,” he finally said, his voice muffled in his own ears from the heavy thrumming of her heart, “they’ll find out eventually and we’ll both be thrown into prison.”

Her chest rose and fell as she sighed. “Where will we go?”

“Anywhere.”

“Anywhere?”

Yoongi smiled as he closed his eyes. “Anywhere but here.”

A moment of silence passed and he felt her sigh again, but her heart beat began to settle.

“Will anyone be able to help us?”

“I’m sure we aren’t the first ones to experience this.” Yoongi raised his head up so he could look at her. “And we won’t be the last.”

He watched her canting her head a little. “Is everything going to be alright?”

Yoongi gave a slight shrug, causing Kiara to giggle a little. “Even if it isn't, it doesn’t matter. I love you, Kiara.” Leaning forward, he pressed his forehead against hers. “Stay with me. ...please.”

As they looked at each other, Yoongi couldn’t help but drink in everything about her. Kiara’s eyes fluttered before closing and he quickly closed what little distance existed between them. This kiss was less intense, soft and meaningful - pulling and tugging at a want that perpetually nagged at him from the shadows for so long. Kiara shed light on the dark crevice of his heart - a part of him that he’d believed was simply meant to be there and to feel nothing else. To want nothing else.

Yoongi wasn’t sure if he was lucky or not, but he knew that he was thankful. He’d been so hollow for so long, he’d forgotten what it was like to feel anything; to yearn for something so much that the desire itself could swallow a person whole. But it was a feeling that made him remember what being alive was supposed to entail; what it truly meant.

Love.

Her love.

His love.

This love.

Their love.

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dragonrajafanfiction · 4 years

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Dragon Dancer: Bondarev

We were so focused on our sword training that Johann and I didn’t notice that Mingfei, Nono and Crow were watching from a distance.

Mingfei and Nono had decided that there was enough information here to spend several nights studying and there was no point in making the long drive back to the shrine.

“As for me,” Crow said, “I have to go back to work!”

“You’re leaving us?” I asked with some worry.

“Oh yes, I have to make my daring escape from the S-grade rebels.” He threw one arm over his eyes. “I barely made it out alive!”

A quiet giggle came from my back.

Crow peeked out from under his arm. “Ah... our sleeping beauty has awakened.”

He walked over to stand next to me peering at Ru’Yi who was looking over my shoulder at him.

“Do you mind if I give her a kiss goodbye?” He asked.

“Sure thing, Prince Charming.” I rolled my eyes.

He planted a kiss on Ru’Yi’s soft hair. “I left some stuff here for her. As well as some food for you. Good food, not the instant noodles and beer I left for the others.”

Mingfei’s jaw dropped. “What are we, chopped liver?”

“Your bodies can take it! Carli has to eat healthy for the baby to grow strong!” Crow roared in response.

Then he turned and grinned at me fondly, becoming that profound and majestic persona, Saeki Ryuuji. “I am a street gangster, and so is my father. He could beat up just about anyone, but when I was a boy, my father told me that I should know how to protect girls, because girls will be mothers in the future. They can have children, and children can bring hope! If the girl is dead and the man is alive, how can he forgive himself?”

We pored over the esoteric manuscripts. Herzog had his own shorthand, abbreviations, and things only he understood. It wasn’t a code, but his lingo and jargon. It made it near impossible to figure out his reasoning.

Nono was using her profiling ability. A lot of these works weren’t complete, not because of his short hand, but because they were referencing other materials not in this collection.

It didn’t help that the man was so disgusting. He conducted hundreds of human experiments. Almost all the disappearances of people in Japan in the past 20 years could likely be traced back to him. For Nono, searching for valuable clues in this man’s thinking was like searching for a wedding ring in a pile of dog vomit.

“Herzog wasn’t basing his work on known dragon research. He’s making leaps in conclusions that shouldn’t be possible given how we understand dragons. Sometimes, he said things that are completely contradictory and yet in hindsight were absolutely right.”

“For example, he knew that the sacred skeleton was not actually a bone but a parasite.” Mingfei said. “Literally no one was saying this, not even among the Hydras, so how did he know?”

“The only way he would know is if he had direct access to someone with first hand knowledge.” I said, sitting with a sleeping baby in my arms. I’d taken the opportunity for her nightly feeding while I listened to them work.

Mingfei looked at me and so did Nono.

I didn’t tell them but I’d actually done something very similar to Herzog’s accomplishments during Code: Leviathan.

EVA had needed assistance in translating reams of dragon text in a short amount of time, but about 25% of that dragon text was completely new to the study. It would take months to decipher it all and our ability to investigate a nearby dragon temple depended on understanding these parchments.

Enter my ethereal twin.

Through my dragon’s scale, I had access to an entirely separate reality, a reality where the White King never rebelled and humans still were ruled by dragons. With her first hand knowledge, I was able to make leaps in interpretations that should not have been possible.

But the system wasn’t perfect. Once my soul twin realized that we were going to kill Leviathan, she hid information from me. It wasn’t until we reached the central chamber of the temple that we found out that we weren’t at Leviathan’s nest at all, but a temple devoted to her human lover, the Raj Yamir.

“What first hand knowledge? Dragons have been dead for ages. The Secret Society is the one with the oldest records...” Nono rubbed her chin.

I shrugged. “Let’s not dismiss a possible solution just because its so obvious. Not only did he know it was a parasite, he had prepared a host for it months in advance. He knew exactly what he was doing ”

That host was a child made from my genetic materials -- materials that he had bought for 500 million dollars.

“He knew exactly what he was doing.” I said, in a softer voice, remembering how helpless I was to stop him.

“Uh. By the way!” Mingfei said loudly. “Do you think Crow has a thing for you?”

I lifted my head, dazed. “Huh?”

“Yeah speaking of obvious...” Nono smirked at me. “I think you should go for it.”

“Oh please.” I rolled my eyes. “He’s very kind and... what he said was nice, but you could tell he was putting on an act.”

“Was making all these dishes for you an act? What about all the baby supplies?” Nono pointed out.

I looked over at it. “He said he’s always wanted kids... ”

I turned my eyes to Johann who was tucked away in a sleeping bag. “I’m already married.”

“He just doesn’t know it.” Nono pursed her lips.

I chewed my lip. “I can’t do that. I swore to death... not to memory.”

Nono tilted her head and cracked open a beer. “Well, I’m done for tonight.”

“Yeah... let’s take a break.” Mingfei said, looking at me with sad eyes.

The next day we were back to it again, this time searching for his sources. One name kept coming up again and again.

Bondarev.

“Herzog himself said that his original research was just going to help him to create a super army which... as far as villains go is not a very creative plot.” Mingfei commented. “He only started talking about the Sacred Skeleton after Bondarev came into the picture.”

By that evening, we had opened and closed at least a hundred books, taking pictures and searching for any references to Bondarev we could find.

We kept asking ourselves: Where did Bondarev get his knowledge? He claimed to be a Romanov, a family of Tsar’s that according to Secret Society information, were hybrids.

“But if Bondarev had inherited this knowledge from his ancestors, why did they go west to fight Hitler and not push into Japan to conquer them and get the most valuable treasure?” Nono said. “Japan was not really an opponent to them later either. But this guy is leading him step by step to becoming the White King on his own!”

“Herzog copied Bonderev’s route to becoming the White King pretty much verbatim.” Mingfei added.

According to Herzog’s notes, he killed Bondarev in a sneak attack, but it seemed too easy. Such a mysterious man was shot by Herzog through a cabin wall with a machine gun so that he died. “Herzog himself also said in the diary, ‘I don’t know if it is really Bondarev, I’ve killed.’”

The face of the deceased was Japanese, not Russian. Herzog guessed that it was Bondarev based on his body and figured Bonderev had performed some sort of plastic surgery to blend in and become part of the Hydra.”

We stared at each other a moment. After two nights, we had seemed to have gotten no closer to any answers. Nono, fed up, grabbed one of the books and pitched it across the room.

Crow, who had just walked in, caught it right in the face. “Wow! Good evening!” He rubbed the bridge of his nose. “Did I come at a bad time?”

“Do you see my face?” Nono snarled, crossing her arms.

“Aaah! So scary! I come bearing gifts!” He held up a bag as if to shield himself. “To make up for my oversight earlier. Fresh gift fruits from the Academy!”

We looked at the bag like it was a bomb. And it could have been given that the Gear Department wasn’t above hiding explosive devices in food.

“Ahahah! It’s fine! I tested it myself on the way here! The finest in Japan. The melon alone is about ten grand!”

Ru’Yi squealed when she saw Crow and he picked her up and squeezed her. “You’re too young for solid food princess!” He planted a loud raspberry into her cheek.

Ru’Yi reached out and grabbed his nose, cackling with a wide smile.

With his nose pinched, he said, “Moutong-sama, if you could please take a look at the video on my phone here. They’ve asked me to broadcast it all over Tokyo.”

He handed over the phone then turned to continue to play with Ru’Yi.

On the screen was a burly middle-aged man with a square face and a determined expression.

“Motong, if you can see this video, please be sure to watch it all the way through. This is a message from your family. You are in great danger. The people you are with are potentially violent and have committed serious crimes. Your family misses your safety very much and hope you will know how to return.”

“This Mingfei business has nothing to do with you. You are innocent. You have been deceived. No matter where you are now, as long as you fight to come home, call the following number and we have the absolute ability to ensure your safety....”

Nono tossed the phone back to Crow. “What does he consider me? A little girl who fell down a well?” She said, her tone cold.

Crow and Mingfei exchanged glances.

“So... he really is your father?” Crow asked carefully. “You don’t have a good relationship with him?”

“Can you see my face right now?” Nono circled her face with one finger.

When Crow tried to ask another question, Mingfei made a throat cutting gesture.

“Well if you don’t care, I’ll let it broadcast then.” He shrugged, pocketing the phone.

“This is... getting too heavy... Why don’t we go out to eat?” Mingfei humbly suggested. “I know a place near here. A 24-hour Ramen shop. We can decompress there.”

#Mingfei Lu #Lu Mingfei #Nono #Chen Moutong #Chu Zihang #Johann Chu #Luminous #Dragon Raja #Fanfiction #Writing

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its8simplejulesblog · 4 years

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It’s Been 17 Days

Since I’ve written anything on here..I’m sorry. I think I just got caught up in the monotony of quarantine (and also I did a lot of tanning/ subsequent falling asleep on my porch outside) that took up a lot of my time. However, the pessimistic side of me says that no one really reads this anyway, so maybe the timing isn’t as important as I thought, and this really is just for me. No matter, I find that I can’t force my writing. I really only do it when there is something pressing on my mind and there definitely is tonight.

(idk why the only gifs on tumblr are anime girls, but honestly I’m not that surprised)

Quarantine has tested me a lot in terms of how I deal with my view of myself. I’m sure that’s true for everyone. When I have absolutely nothing to do I’ll sit on my bed and think about what my values are. I know that first and foremost, knowing my worth is something I value a lot. Sometimes I have to peel myself off of tik tok because even though I feel the best I ever have, it’s still impossible to not be disheartened by the appearances of some of the girls on that app. It’s so sad too because you can clearly see the affects that that kind of content has on its audiences.

I think that something I’ve come to notice as well is that modeling was a really healthy thing in my life before the pandemic started. That seems really backwards, but I think that it boosted my spirits so much. I think it’s because I never went into it with the mindset of “I want everyone to feel like shit looking at a good picture of me,” but moreso, “I’m actually really happy with myself right now and I want to capture that feeling.” Working with Dom has been a highlight as well, because even though we’re promoting her business, it’s just fun for us. We put on Disney music and laugh and she makes me feel like I should be proud of myself. And, the beautiful thing about it is that everyone has something that makes them feel like that: whether it’s singing or dancing or acting or programming or mechanical engineering or drawing etc etc.

Another thing I’ve noticed on tik tok: everyone..and I mean EVERYONE is obsessed with love. For obvious reasons, haha, but the level of toxicity is crazy. It’s almost like no one knows how they really should be treated and the bare minimum is a shock. The amount of tik toks that are about girls getting texts from their crush or being left on read or their body counts or makeup to impress him is exhausting. Honestly, I feel fatigued :) And it is nearly always followed by tik toks of girls crying and their makeup is running and they’re saying they hate men or they’re screaming about how their ex is a piece of shit and “look at me now.”

I get it, I understand everything they’re saying. Getting left on read sucks, and it hurts, and you overthink it and think you did something wrong. But, at the end of the day, do you SEE yourself? You look ridiculous. One of my biggest lessons in quarantine is quite simply to let that shit go. Did I cry to my mom at 4am because I guy stopped talking to me for a day? Yes, but did I reflect on it and recognize that that was probably a waste of time (and sleep) also yes.

In all of my blog posts the central message ends up being essentially the same, perspective. Recently I’ve chosen to see the world in as positive a light as I possibly can. It’s SO hard to do, especially in these times, but I’m holding out for good. Good attracts good. I like to think. If you sink yourself as low as you can, and believe the worst in people, then that’s what you’ll attract, and you’ll end up hurt. It happens everyone time. I know that a lot of stuff I write sounds so cringey, but it is truly stuff I have come to believe during quarantine. You almost feel lighter when you treat life like a gift instead of a curse.

Recently I’ve been thinking a lot about my future. Not in an unhealthy way, because I like to be as mindful to what is in front of me as possible, but as something to get excited about. I can’t wait to (possibly) go to grad school. I can’t wait to travel and do good for others. I can’t wait to learn as much as I can about as many people as I can. I can’t wait to meet my best friend and get married and blah blah I’m just excited. I just wish more people would embrace the uncertainty of the things to come instead of back away from it (disclaimer that I recognize that this is a privilege I have as I notice that there are many factors that lend to my opportunities in this weird world we live in)

So, when things don’t go my way in the present, I’m not going to say it’s not hard. Being an empath, I get close and attached to people really quickly and when it’s not reciprocated in the same way it really really stings. The key is not taking that to heart though. I know what I’m worth and while I always give people the benefit of the doubt, I also need to recognize that it’s just a fact that not everything will work out in my favor. And if someone is not jumping at the chance to talk to you or be with you or make you feel like you’re not worth their time then you need to recognize that that’s not a reflection of your value.

I always knew that :) That was nothing new. Putting it into practice is harder though, but every night I feel better. (I also say this every time) but the people you surround yourself with tend to be a reflection of how you feel about yourself and I’m happy to say that that is true for me.

Of course, there are times when some things just make no sense and you take it out on yourself; but let me be the first to urge you not to do that. You never ever know what is going on in someone’s life or mind. We’re all innately, primally, selfish, so of course we would think that we did something to provoke someone or make them hate us. Chances are though, it doesn’t involve you. The more I grow up the more selective I am in the battles I choose. Most of the times, playing games with people is not the move. If you’re upset, please god be upfront about it. You don’t want to spend your time on someone or something that doesn’t make you better.

The second, and more important part of that though: leave it alone. This is something I struggle with. If I’m upset with someone I’m usually not “mean,” I’ll just make a lot of passive aggressive jokes about them. Again, not my finest moments. It’s something I’m working on leaving in the past. There’s no use bringing someone else down. I’m not a hypocrite.

Anyway, in conclusion, I know that quarantine can be pretty lonely. I think I’m more lonely now than I was before solely because people are starting to go out and hang out with friends now (which is something that my family has definitely been more cautious about). At the end of it all though, I think I made the best friend I’ve ever had during quarantine (it’s myself, if that wasn’t clear)

It’s so difficult to sit with yourself and be content. I’m definitely not there, but I’m a lot closer than I was. And even though I most definitely fo not talk to my friends 24/7, I know they’re still there. That trust is something I really value. And, while I appreciate it, I’m excited to carry my own weight a little bit better when this is all over.

You’re all Valuable (Yes I mean ALL of you)

-Julia

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nellie-elizabeth · 5 years

Text

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend: I Have to Get Out (4x13)

After watching this episode, I went on tumblr and discovered that there is Discourse about it. People are really heating up with the ship wars, and I'm just kinda over here with a shrug emoji about it all. That said, I am having some very complicated feelings about this episode in particular... let's get talking.

Cons:

So... there are a number of things that I didn't like about this episode, but that I acknowledge might actually not be so bad, provided that they are handled well in the coming weeks. The biggest example is this: I hated when Josh and Nathaniel both had scheming looks on their faces about the fact that Greg and Rebecca broke up. Josh and Rebecca have had such a fun dynamic this season and I don't want that to be ruined. And Nathaniel just had a whole episode devoted to his understanding that he needs to let Rebecca go. I don't want to see a repeat of the same poisonous behavior. BUT, I have to admit that this show is not just about Rebecca growing as a person. It's about the whole gang getting better and making strides to improve. Rebecca has backslides on her road to recovery, and I'm not saying that Josh and Nathaniel should be given as much care within the narrative, especially since neither of them has BPD, but it's possible that we're trying to show here that improving oneself doesn't always move in a straight line. Josh and Nathaniel might both be better people than when we first met them, but is it okay if we see them stumble and do bad things still sometimes? I don't know. I'm frustrated, but I also trust this show to handle the situation well, without condoning these men's behavior, but also without condemning them as people.

Then there's Skylar Astin. He's doing such an amazing job as Greg, but after watching this episode it has just occurred to me that it's really weird to bring Greg back if he's not going to be a central concern in the final episodes. I know that he doesn't need to end up with Rebecca in order to be important or grow as a person, but Greg was given an off-screen arc that felt pretty complete. He moved away and started a new life, met someone he was happy with and stayed sober. Did Greg really get brought back into the story just so that Rebecca could date him and break up with him, and then we'd see him kinda fade in to the background for the final few episodes? It feels weird to me. Again, though, I don't know where this is going. Maybe Greg will feel essential in these last few episodes. Maybe they do have more to do with him. Hell, maybe he and Rebecca end up together after all. I can only judge based on what I know so far, and what I know so far has given me some concerns.

Pros:

I loved the song about antidepressants. Holy crap. It was amazing. The choreography was cool, the message was so important to hear, the comedy was on point. I was all about this song. I also like seeing Rebecca adjust to her meds. She feels really sleepy, but she's sticking with it, and she knows that she needs to give it a try. For this show to point out the stigma against taking pills, and then do its part to dismantle that stigma, is really important and powerful. Rebecca is feeling the side effects, but she's not in a total fog like she has been in the past with her other meds.

The whole wacky scheme to get Paula out of the hospital so she could take the bar exam was great (although the bar is usually a two day test, so that was kind of odd). I like that it was silly and scheme-y and felt like vintage Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, but it was also more toned down and the consequences were less severe than in past instances. To me it seemed like a sign that Rebecca can recover and manage her mental health while still being the same person she's always been. She'll still do kind of wacky stunts with her friends, she'll still cross the line sometimes to help someone out, and she's still the kind of person with bad luck enough to get accidentally stuck in a morgue with three corpses who share her name.

Speaking of, the reprise to "The End of the Movie" was another awesome song. I think it works so well because of the themes of that earlier song. When we heard it last time, Rebecca was at her lowest point. She was realizing that life isn't going to work itself out magically in a tidy narrative, and she feels completely helpless because of that fact. In this instance, she is feeling tired on her new meds, and she's feeling sad that she doesn't have a dream to pursue. She wants life to give her a sign, and this time it does. It's not a lesson about life being like a movie after all. It's about being hopeful, and making proactive decisions without waiting for the universe to just guide you. And I love the idea of Rebecca pursuing theatre. It's one of those things that's totally obvious in hindsight, but I never would have thought of it as an end-game goal for her. I hope it goes well!

As angry as I was by the last few seconds of the episode, I actually thought Nathaniel, Greg, and Josh were hilarious for the majority of the run-time. I loved the fight, and the song cracked me up. Finally we're getting several episodes that have multiple great songs in a row - I think they were saving the good stuff for the end of the season! My favorite part of the song was the musical theatre bit, where Greg says he's really just a "singer who moves." That was excellent and so accurate. I also adored Nathaniel's exasperated and slightly freaked out reaction to the whole thing, and Greg setting down the weapon and saying "well, I didn't know," and then going right back to awkwardly grappling with Josh. So much comedy. These two men are acting incredibly immature, but I loved laughing at them all the same.

The breakup between Greg and Rebecca was really heartbreaking, and real, and true to both of their characters. I like that Rebecca talked about her triggers, explained that it wasn't Greg's fault, and was honest about the night of their fight, and how she went to both Nathaniel and Josh for comfort. She tells him about being on meds and doing the work to be okay. I go back and forth over what I want the ending of this show to be. I think Rebecca is someone who wants and deserves a healthy and happy romantic relationship, but I also think she's being honest with herself about needing to get on track before she can really make something work with another person. Her relationship with Greg has been so much healthier and better this time around than any of the other romances we've seen her have on this show. She's been honest, and seemed truly happy with him. Just because it didn't quite work out in this instance doesn't mean she's doomed to be single for life, and I think the show is doing a good job of telling us that.

Finally, the Darryl subplot was super adorable. I don't know that I have a lot to say about it, other than just: awwww. It was so sweet that Madison conspired with her rival in order to get her dad and her rival's mom a chance to get to know each other. It's cute when kids are aware of their parents' needs and want to help them out. I hope Darryl and this new woman can find some time to hang out and discuss bean dip and being single parents!

That's what I've got for now. Broken record time: this show is amazing. I might be slightly antsy about some of the stuff with Nathaniel and Josh, but I completely trust this show to know what it's doing and to do it right.

8/10

#review #crazy ex-girlfriend #crazy ex-girlfriend review #crazy ex girlfriend #crazy ex girlfriend review #crazy ex-gf #crazy ex gf

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paladin-pile · 6 years

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Shiro’s role in VLD and what that means for us.

I see a massive variety of opinions on Shiro these days, most of them negative, and I’m getting tired of it. I’m not posting this to be salty or argumentative. I’m here to explain why we should be grateful for this brilliant rep, this character with the most beautiful and inspiring story that should got down in history. Shiro is not the show’s “punching bag” or anything else, and in this meta I’d like to begin explaining my position on why Shiro’s story is exactly what the world, (that includes us) needs. No matter what your position, please take just a few minutes and read.

In my perspective, being a punching bag means that a character is being repeatedly hurt, beaten down, and being ground into lower and more painful places in life, for no reason, or for reasons that are for action purposes only, not contributing to a meaningful arc for the character. It might even be detrimental to their arc. The characters in the MCU are a perfect example if this. I like Marvel movies, and I love the characters, but as I watched through the movies I started to like them less and less because of how the characters were treated. It was hard to watch the people I cared about accumulate trauma on top of trauma that was never addressed. They were never allowed to rest, heal, reach a better place in their physical/mental/emotional states.

Sometimes in little things, yes, but not much. I just watched people get beaten to a pulp physically and emotionally. I cared about them, I want them to be okay, I want them to have hope and opportunity of meaningful connections, peace, and recovery. If Tony Stark or Steve Rodgers die in Avengers 4, I see that as a horrible end to horrible arcs for both of them. Steve has been fighting his whole life, never got to have a home and family, or deal with some of his issues. Tony has barely gotten a glimpse of a happy life with Pepper and a baby, and has grown so close to Peter. Peter has lost his parents, his uncle, and now he might lose Tony too.

Do you see what I mean here? If you’re familiar with the MCU you might see my point. This is because the movies exist to serve the comic book action, not the people. The action, the aliens, the robots, the fight scenes; that’s the whole purpose of these movies and they’re not going to take time to show us how Natasha is slowly recovering from her childhood trauma with help from Clint and his family. When we watch endless action-based stories like this, we tend to get depressed because we long for hope. Everyday in real life we see hopeless situations where the people we love get hurt and hurt again without any hint of things getting better, we don’t want to see that in our media.

But Voltron...Voltron is different.

The problem is that people come to Voltron looking for a utopia (“If war was perfect this is what is should look like. If everything happened perfectly for so-and-so this is what I think it should be and its not so it’s evil,”etc). That’s not going to work. Voltron does a great job of showing realistic experiences that we can relate too, and still give us hope and inspiration. The character development and story arcs for each character are nothing short of brilliant. Please also keep in mind, some characters are more central than the others and will receive more focus, but everyone gets at least some meaningful things. What makes Voltron do this while other shows/movies don’t, is that Voltron is not about Voltron, it’s about the characters. The first season or two you might think it’s about the robots and the big fights, but I recall it was around season 5 that the realization hit me. “Holy shit this isn’t about Voltron, it never was.” What made me realize? Well, Shiro and Keith’s related arcs specifically. The entire plot revolves around how they revolve around each other. Pay some close attention to each plot point and ask how it relates to Keith trying to save Shiro or vice versa. But that’s beside the point of this post. I came here to talk about Shiro.

Shiro is the main character of Voltron. No contest. Everything revolves around him, is influenced by him, or is tied back to him somehow. It’s incredible to watch. The show starts with him and I’ll damn well bet it’ll end with him. He’s the fated, Chosen One that the whole show is on the shoulders of. So why don’t most people realize this?

Shiro isn’t a loud person, he shoulders a lot of his work in the background. We don’t see things from his pov very often. It’s easy for our attention to drift to the more outgoing, loud and chaotic characters, but that does not determine how important they are to the story.

Doing rep right is not, “This person is LGBT/poc/mentally ill character, therefore nothing bad can every happen to them.” That would be of no help to anyone at all. People need to see rep that goes through things that they do or even worse, and is still ok, who can still be happy and adapt and be strong and find meaning in life, be in healthy, wonderful relationships. People who can climb higher and shine brighter because of what they’ve been through, not in spite of it.

Remember the beginning where I described what it means for a character to be a punching bag? Shiro is none of those things. This sweet, earnest, and lovely boy has been through so much suffering. You’ve all seen it, or inferred it from what we did see. But never have I ever seen someone with such a mighty heart, or such resilience. He kept fighting, never lost hope, never gave up on the people and causes he cared about. He never got any less kind and selfless. He stayed loyal to what was right and never sought his own glory. And he has been abundantly rewarded for it. The MCU characters I talked about have gotten worse of the course of their arcs. Shiro has gotten better.

His life isnt perfect. It’s not a utopia. He has sustained a lot of losses, his path has changed direction in confusing and sometimes painful ways. But he takes it in stride. No suffering Shiro has been put through has been for nothing, and in this is the basis for my argument. It has all changed and influsned his character arc in positive ways. Even if it took a while for that to become apparent. He has been leveling up this whole time. Even things that seemed the worst turned out to be a blessing to both him and the universe.

Is he sad about no longer being a paladin? We will never know. Even if he was he is not one to dwell on it. He now has a bond with another mecha just like he had with black, one that’s his and only his. (One that's 100 times bigger than his old ship and way cooler, Voltron whomst?) He has his own path and his own crew, he’s working side by side with the people he considers family. He is showing signs of healing, of being happy. He’s just as much a part of the team as he was before. It’s the fandom who excludes him from their art and fics of the othes, the fandom who is casting him aside, not the show.

For someone to say “Oh Shiro’s arc is terrible and he’s being treated badly because look at these things that happened to him. Things he loved got taken away and now he’s lost and sad and feels useless and is getting knocked down a few pegs in life.” Where are you seeing this? What happens in our own lives when things change or painful things happen. Do we roll over and die? Say “oh my life will be miserable from now on because this or that happened?” No, and neither would Shiro.

We see Shiro growing. He is leveling up. He knows how to live and adapt and find meaning. I don’t think Shiro regrets or mourns anything for very long. His coping skills are very good since he came back form the “dead.” He may have feelings of sadness and loss. Of his arm, of people close to him like Adam or others, of the people lost on Earth. But roles? Jobs? Circumstances that he knows could have happened to anyone and he can’t change? He knows better than that. Have more faith in Shiro people. I have been more inspired and encouraged and blessed by his character and story than I have in any other media ever. I love him and I am grateful.

I understand that a lot of good folks who love Shiro have been genuinely concerned and confused. If you are one of those, please message me. I would love to talk to you. I know some folks have made posts mentioning specific events in the show that have influenced their perception and I was not able to address all the specifics in this post, only generally. Anyone is more than welcome do drop by my ask box and start a conversation!

#Shiro #voltron #vld #takashi shirogane #voltron s7 #pal meta #lets talk #Shiro is so underrated and misunderstood

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heaven-delight · 6 years

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YERI

I felt so so thankful to the fans who thought of me. Also, I felt that experiencing this moment was very special after realizing that everybody in that arena would have felt this emotional together.

What did you think about the most while you were getting ready for Red Velvet’s first solo concert? I wanted to fill this concert to the brim with Red Velvet’s charms. Because this first concert meant a lot to us, we pitched in a lot of ideas. So, before the title “Red Room” was made, I came up with potential names for the concert and texted them to the director. Also, because there are a lot of good songs in our albums, so I was really looking forward to showing these on stage because I’ve never had a chance like this.

Including the “Shark Family Song” on the setlist was one of your ideas, wasn’t it? Yeah! This was the song that the kids prepared for me when I starred on “The Return of Superman.” I got a lot of pure and clear energy from their clumsy but cute performance. So, I sang this song with the other members often, and they liked it a lot, which made me want to share the energy with the fans. Thankfully, the director reviewed this idea positively, and the fans liked it too so I felt proud. Other than that, I also pitched in other witty ideas that used the many images of animations, such as a stage where I performed while dressed up as Sakura from “Cardcaptor Sakura.” As you can see, I like watching animations. (Laughs)

The main background of “Red Room” was Yeri’s room. The concert must’ve been special for you. I didn’t think that I was ‘Yeri.’ Like how the other members acted four fairies who have come over to play, I also acted as a Yeri, who had the same name as me but was a different person. So, I also felt like I had come over to play in that room. I was able to enjoy those three days like a dream thanks to that.

What do you think the charm of “Red Room” is? “Red Room” is very abstract and every stage is connected together with a story, so the other members and I all prepared our linesㅡones that would fit each of our charactersㅡlike a musical. The concert itself was built around one central storyline, like a musical or a movie, and we all acted our characters out. I think that’s the biggest difference that “Red Room” has compared to other performances, and also its biggest charm.

Then what are you normally perceived as in Red Velvet? You’re well known as the ‘bright youngest member.’ Actually, my personality isn’t that bright. I think a lot of people think of me like that because I’m the youngest in the group and because of my image. Actually, I’m the eldest in my family, and I have two baby sisters. It’s hard for me to say that I’m ‘bright’ myself because sometimes, I jump around because I’m happy, but other times, I feel down. So, I think it’s hard to define my personality with just one single word. Of course, I do try to live brightly and positively. (Laughs)

What was the most memorable moment during the concert? I appear on stage on a bed, with thunder sounds. I can’t forget seeing the waves of lightsticks as I appeared on stage. I can’t remember every single moment of the concert, but I’ll never forget the sound of the fans’ cheers and how they waved their lightsticks. Waving your hands and cheering for someone for over two hours is actually a real hard thing. So I was really thankful because I could feel the weight of the fans’ hearts directly. I think I tried to make eye contact and see the faces of the fans more because I also wanted to see them as much as I could. The fans in the front row might have found me a bit overbearing. (Laughs)

You successfully wrapped up “Red Room.” Are you looking forward to the next concert? I think I’ll continue to pitch ideas in for the next concert too. Would the director find me bothering? (Laughs) Personally, even if it’s not a concert, I have a performance that I want to do. Since I’m really interested in lyric-writing and song-writing, I have quite a lot of lyrics that I have written. In the future, I want to perform the song that I wrote while thinking of the fans. People occasionally write letters when they have a hard time saying what’s in their mind, don’t they? I wrote that song in that kind of situation too. It’s not fit to be called a ‘fan song.’ I want to call it a song where I shyly said what’s in my mind. I’m only dreaming of a stage like this right now, because I think it’s a bit too early to promise that I’ll play this on stage yet.

I can see where you’re going. At the concert, didn’t the fans do a special event for Red Velvet? I cry easily, so when I saw the banner event that the fans did, I cried during all three days of the concert. The words written on the banner were all different depending on the concert day. ‘Hello, our pride,’ ‘Thank you, our happiness,’ ‘I’ll store everything that I’m feeling right now.’ They were all touching and lovely words, and I think they’re quite nice words, the more that I think about them. I couldn’t hold my tears back when the fans held the banners up all at the same time. I felt so so thankful to the fans who thought of me. Also, I felt that experiencing this moment was very special, after realizing that everybody in that arena would have felt this emotional together.

Do you have any parts you wish you could’ve done better on since it was your first concert? I’m sad that I couldn’t ride the carts because of the Olympic Hall’s limitations. It was a stage prop that I had my eyes on whenever I saw them during the other artists’ concerts. There aren’t a lot of chances to get close to the audience in the back rows of the seats, right? Well, during “Cool World,” I did circle the whole venue, but I wish I could’ve seen the fans a bit closer for a bit longer. Also, I think that would have been more fun with the carts! If there’s a next concert, I hope I could ride the cart and meet the fans!

Lastly, leave a message to the other members, who you performed with. We had a busy 2017. We could’ve treated each other poorly because of that, but actually I got a lot of help from the other members. I also want to take care of the other members and the people around me more. I was so thankful for the other members this year, on top of being able to do “Red Room” together. I hope everybody, including me, the other members and everybody who works with us could be healthy. I hope this could be a psychologically and physically healthy year! Let’s have fun singing on stage together in the future too!

#red velvet #rv #red velvet translation #rv translation #rv trans #red velvet trans #heaven-delight #m:yeri #t:interview #e:redroom

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humphreycochrane90-blog · 5 years

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Real Estate Properties For Sale Or Rent In Tallinn, Harjumaa, Area Guide

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It's great to know the TYPE of man you want to be with, but stop trying to change the men you meet into your fairytale, and accept nobody, including you is perfect. C'est à dire que le contenu d'un tableau ou d'un objet déclaré avec const bloque la réassignation de la variable, mais ne rend pas la valeur immuable. Tant que des gens comme toi diront que si on a pas le même avis que toi, on rejoint Le Pen. Lisaks osati tegevuste järel välja tuua täiendavalt näiteid, kuidas lapsi igapäevaselt aidata võiks. I know you're adults, but my mother used to say how when three kids were together there was "always a problem". Any problems that you notice should be reported to front desk staff right away. The location of the log file for the log application will be shown in the Data Flow server's log. I can rent the place to you furnished or unfurnished, depending on what you want and also long term lease will be favorable since i won't be coming soon you will definitely be informed 2month before our arrivalAll bills like phone, internet, water and Electricity are included in the rental fee so you have nothing to worry about,i want to let you know that we do not intend making so much money on our home or inconveniencing you we only want our place to be kept nice and clean.I just want to let you know that we wont be staying at the house, you will have the place to yourself as long as it is kept nice and neatFeel free to get back to me after inspecting the place so we can proceed with other move in procedures on time. Donc, il ne faut pas trop s'étonner non plus de se faire insulter par la famille Attac : en ce qui concerne le TCE ils ont posé le cerveau. If over at this website are just starting out with Spring Cloud Data Flow, you should probably read the Getting Started ” guide before diving into this section. As a result, you should see a list of available REST endpoints. In that case, you must configure the Composed Task Runner to use the same datasource that the Spring Cloud Data Flow instance is using. Comme on l'a déjà exposé ci-dessus, il n'est ni possible ni souhaitable d'anticiper d'ores et déjà à cet égard par une révision de la Constitution (voir ci-dessus, nº 7). B & Q than half a year ago into China, the original home in China, the world has only 12 stores in Home Depot's appliance business can only "test the water" to describe, though, Home Depot's appliance market performance in North America extraordinary. No matter how well the shoes are made, our feet won't stay dry in ballet flats with even the lightest of rain. The importance of promoting activity in young people cannot be overstated. I joined Exotic Time Club before 4 Months,and i must say that these guys provide these best services of all.Exotic Time Club such a true value of money. Combination of Victorian elegance and chic style, with contemporary outfit is un-swearing what else but London Boutique hotels. Jack the Ripper was thought to have had both genders but was sewn up to grow up as a man but later developed as a woman and became so angry at women, whom could have children and grow up as respectable women of England, but decided to throw their lives away and spent their time in the beds of sex-hungered men who were more than happy to pay for their services, and started to cut out their uterus's because he was unable to grow up as a normal adult of either gender. If you are just starting out with Spring Cloud Data Flow, you should probably read the Getting Started guide before diving into this section. Even though the exchange is durable, there needs to be a durable queue bound to the exchange for the message to be stored for later consumption. Tantsukooli lõpetajaks on tark tantsija - kehaliselt, vaimselt ja emotsionaalselt intelligentne inimene, kes tuleb edukalt toime iseseisva ja ühtlasi teisi arvestava eluga nii tantsulaval kui mujal. You never know where the perfect lead will come from, but often people are your best source. Most London hotels are equipped with fabulous conference facilities that enable guests to host conferences with alacrity and ease. Spring Cloud Data Flow (SCDF) provides a higher level way to create this group of three Spring Cloud Stream applications by introducing the concept of a stream. Take 5 minutes everyday to think about all the people, experiences, lessons and mistakes you are thankful for. Je me rappelle un reportage sur une entreprise américaine qui avait construit à partir d'une ancienne plate-forme pétrolière une plate-forme de lancement pour un lanceur de satellite privé. The advance in has created a significant trend in the tile sector especially the sizes.

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princesssarisa · 6 years

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Weird things people say about “Wicked”

I’ve never been a huge fan of the musical Wicked, although I respect its quality and sometimes enjoy listening to its music. I’ve only seen it once onstage, and believe it or not, I found it too bleak and depressing for my taste. After all, under its sparkly diva-vehicle facade, it has just as much biting socio-political criticism as Les Misérables and twice as much cynicism, and both Elphaba and Glinda’s journeys are ultimately tragic ones, even if the ending is hopeful. I don’t care for “friends who become enemies” stories either, even if they do reconcile in the end. Still, I think I remember the show’s plot and characters reasonably well… and I think I can tell when people’s comments about it are slightly off. Or extremely off. Even though I’ve only dabbled lightly in the show’s fandom, I’ve still repeatedly heard or read comments from fans that either rely on false equivalence or seem to miss the whole point of the story. Here are my thoughts on the iffiest things I’ve heard people say about this musical.

Note: Thanks to @anghraine for the term “false equivalence.” I had never quite known what to call what I was hearing, until I read her post about Star Wars prequel fans who say “You just don’t want Anakin to have flaws!” to fans who object to his mass murder of the Tusken Raiders. This sort of thing happens in a lot of fandoms, it seems.

1. “It’s just a piece of fluff.”

This was the first response I got when I first mentioned that the show depressed me. “Don’t take it so seriously. It’s just a cute, clever perspective flip of The Wizard of Oz.”

Now I think most people will disagree with that. Just because it takes place in Oz and has a fairly light, cartoony surface doesn’t mean it can’t contain real, pointed socio-political commentary about corrupt leaders, racism, bigotry, rebellion vs. conformity, and the way public opinion creates our “heroes” and “villains.” It most certainly can and does. Its commentary is even more brutally relevant now in Trump’s America than it was in Bush’s when the show debuted.

In a similar vein is “Stop focusing on the politics. It’s all about Elphaba and Glinda’s friendship/love story.” But that’s like looking at The King and I and saying “It’s not about East/West relations or feminism. It’s just Anna and the King’s love story.” That’s total nonsense; their whole relationship is inextricable from the bigger themes. I do think most fans realize this, but now and then you find fans who don’t.

2. “Both sides have good and bad traits, nobody’s perfect.”

This one is about Elphaba vs. the Wizard and about the show’s whole overreaching message.

“Neither Elphaba nor the Wizard is either a villain or a hero,” I’ve heard people say. “They’re both morally gray. That’s the whole point. There are two sides to every story.” If I’m remembering right, even parts of the show itself promote that view more than its actual plot supports: e.g. in the song “Wonderful” (although the Wizard is being generous to himself there). But while it’s true that they’re both morally gray, I can’t buy the implication that neither is any better or worse than the other. That’s massive false equivalence.

True, the Wizard has some sympathetic traits, but his rule over Oz is still a totalitarian regime that manipulates the masses and brutally oppresses innocent minorities. Elphaba’s rebellion against him is absolutely heroic and her vilification by the people of Oz is absolutely unfair. True, she eventually decides to be “wicked” and does the truly bad things we know from The Wizard of Oz, but only in the midst of a mental breakdown when she’s lost hope for her mission and apparently lost everything and everyone she ever loved. That still doesn’t make her as bad as the Wizard or Madame Morrible, nor does the Wizard’s better side come close to matching hers.

Some people seem to honestly think that in the Wicked universe, the original Wizard of Oz portrait of the Wizard as a harmless lovable rogue, Oz as an idyllic fantasy land and Elphaba as a monster is still basically true and valid, just “not the whole story.” I don’t understand how they can think that way. It disturbs me slightly that they can see the Wizard and co.’s persecution of the Animals and just shrug it off with “There are two sides to every story,” or worse, “Nobody’s perfect.” Would they say that about comparable real world leaders, from George W. Bush, to Donald Trump, to… others whose names don’t even need to be mentioned? I hope not!

3. “Glinda is a loyal friend.”

Now maybe I’m misremembering, or maybe my definition of “loyalty” demands too much. But doesn’t a huge part of Glinda’s character arc rest on her failure to be fully loyal to Elphaba and on the lessons she learns when her disloyalty leads to disaster? Is it loyal of her to serve and uphold the oppressive regime that Elphaba sacrifices everything to fight against? Is she loyal when she turns against Elphaba because of the love triangle with Fiyero, however temporarily? Yes, she’s sympathetic, but as is often the case with popular characters (no pun intended), some fans seem to love her so much that they forget about all her flaws and growth. Even though said flaws and growth are central to her role.

4. “All loved ones fight sometimes.”

Continuing on the above theme of idealizing Elphaba and Glinda’s relationship. When I’ve mentioned that I personally don’t ship Gelphie because of the catfight scene, I’ve gotten this response: “Haven’t you ever gotten mad at someone you love? That’s part of every relationship!” But this just reeks of false equivalence.

Yes, of course I’ve gotten mad at loved ones. But I’ve never tried to get them captured by their worst enemies, let alone taken advantage of their relative’s death to do so, or gotten into full-blown catfights with them. No matter how beautifully Elphaba and Glinda reconcile in the end or how beautifully they change each other’s lives, how can anyone view that genuinely vicious fight, or the genuine betrayals that lead to it, as just a typical spat between friends or lovers? You can like their relationship arc yet still admit that their conflict goes beyond a healthy level. Especially the physical violence. The double standard astounds me when people despise any man who slaps a woman, yet see nothing wrong with two women slapping and lunging to attack each other.

This reminds me of Padme responding to Anakin’s mass murder confession in Attack of the Clones with “To be angry is to be human.” Not nearly as bad as that example, of course, but all too similar.

5. “Glinda was right.”

“It’s not aptitude, it’s the way you’re viewed.”

I’ve seen this a few times on TVTropes, both on the show’s own YMMV page (under “Family-Unfriendly Aesop”) and elsewhere. To sum it up concisely in my own words: “Glinda is right that popularity matters more than actual good qualities. She’s right to choose outward conformity over blatant rebellion; to achieve anything in politics, you need to please the crowd. Elphaba’s rebellion fails miserably, while Glinda is the one who changes Oz by joining the Wizard, endearing herself to the masses and gaining power, then reshaping the system from the inside out. Glinda might seem shallow, but she’s ultimately wiser than Elphaba.”

Now of course this whole statement is partly true, maybe even mostly true. I agree that “Public opinion matters more than real merit or truth” is indeed a main message of the show: cynical and sad, but true. But since when does the show support that fact and not criticize it? Doesn’t the story stand up for underdogs and rebels like Elphaba? Doesn’t it encourage us to question popular narrative of “heroes” and “villains” and to resist oppressors? Hasn’t Winnie Holzman said in at least one interview (I know she has - I’ve heard it) that the show’s main theme is Elphaba and Glinda “standing up to power”? And while it’s true that Glinda uses her status and popularity to succeed where Elphaba failed, would she ever have been inspired to do so without Elphaba’s overt rebellion in the first place?

To come away from this musical with an anti-rebellion, pro-conformity mindset seems to be completely missing the point. I wonder how many people with that mindset are the same ones who see Les Mis and think Victor Hugo’s message was “Revolutions always fail and society will never change”?

Maybe if I saw the show again, I would see aspects I’ve forgotten and agree more with these statements. But I doubt it. I haven’t heard any of these remarks too often, but the people who do make them seem to have seen a different version of the show than I did.

#theatre #musicals #wicked #musical theatre #the wizard of oz #elphaba #glinda #wierdness #fandom #fanwank #false equivalence #tvtropes #my opinion

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charminglatina · 4 years

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Birthday Profiles Of Riverdale Actors Based On The Secret Language Of Birthdays Concept! (Part V)

What Is The Secret Language Concept?

The Secret Language scientific personality reports have proven to be over 90% accurate after 21 years in use by millions of people in a dozen languages worldwide. Our data comes from Gary Goldschneider’s 40-year empirical study of the life stories of more than 20,000 people, analyzed by date of birth. Gary looked at 50 people born on your birthday and found the personality traits held in common by 45 of them. Then he created personality profiles from those traits for each day, week, month, season and year and I further combined those profile names into the ultimate distillation of your personality - your Secret Language Name. Combining astrology, numerology, and pure psychic intuition, The Secret Language of Birthdays is a wholly unique compilation that reveals one’s strengths, weaknesses, and major issues while providing practical advice and spiritual guidance. Many have suspected that your birthday affects your personality and how you relate to others. Nineteen years and over one million copies later, The Secret Language of Birthdays continues to fascinate readers by describing the characteristics associated with being born on a particular day. The 366 personality profiles are based on astrology, numerology, the tarot, and Gary Goldschneider’s observations of more than 14,000 people. Your strengths, weaknesses, and major concerns will be illuminated while you are given practical advice and spiritual guidance. After you study your profile, it will be hard to resist examining those of family, friends, colleagues, and even celebrities.

The Personality Periods

The forty-eight personality periods, made up of twelve cusps and thirty six weeks, are units between six and nine days in length. Personology predicts the personality characteristics of anyone born within these dates. In other words, those born in the same period will share certain predictable character traits. While this may not completely represent ever individual, it is sufficient to provide an understanding of his or her basic energies. Extrapolating from the personology periods, it is possible to predict the nature of the relationship between any two people. Thus, The Secret Language Of Relationships combines each period of the year with itself and every other period to predict the nature of the resulting relationship. For example, a person born on March 31 falls into the Aries I period. This is the Week of the Child which symbolizes the freshness and openness of early childhood and of the spring season (lasting from March 25 to April 1). People born during this time are characterized by a childlike, enthusiastic orientation. This in contrast to a person born on November 10, who would be a Scorpio II (encompassing November 3 to 11). Born in the fall, which is symbolically likened to middle age, this week takes Depth as its central symbol. Thus, it becomes possible to consider the theoretical implications of an Aries I-Scorpio II relationship.

The Fourty-Eight Periods & Cusps

1. Pisces-Aries Cusp (Mar 19-Mar 24) – The Cusp Of Rebirth

2. Aries I (Mar 25-Apr 02) – The Week Of The Child

3. Aries II (Apr 03-Apr 10) – The Week Of The Star

4. Aries III (Apr 11-Apr 18) – The Week Of The Pioneer

5. Aries-Taurus Cusp (Apr 19-Apr 24) – The Cusp Of Power

6. Taurus I (Apr 25-May 02) – The Week Of Manifestation

7. Taurus II (May 03-May 10) – The Week Of The Teacher

8. Taurus III (May 11-May 18) – The Week Of The Natural

9. Taurus-Gemini Cusp (May 19-May 24) – The Cusp Of Energy

10. Gemini I (May 25-Jun 02) – The Week Of Freedom

11. Gemini II (Jun 03-Jun 10) – The Week Of New Language

12. Gemini III (Jun 11-Jun 18) – The Week Of The Seeker

13. Gemini-Cancer Cusp (Jun 19-Jun 24) – The Cusp Of Magic

14. Cancer I (Jun 25-Jul 02) – The Week Of The Empath

15. Cancer II (Jul 03-Jul 10) – The Week Of The Unconventional

16. Cancer III (Jul 11-Jul 18) – The Week Of The Persuader

17. Cancer-Leo Cusp (Jul 19-Jul 25) – The Cusp Of Oscillation

18. Leo I (Jul 26-Aug 02) – The Week Of Authority

19. Leo II (Aug 03-Aug 10) – The Week Of Balanced Strength

20. Leo III (Aug 11-Aug 18) – The Week Of Leadership

21. Leo-Virgo Cusp (Aug 19-Aug 25) – The Cusp Of Exposure

22. Virgo I (Aug 26-Sept 02) – The Week Of System Builders

23. Virgo II (Sept 03-Sept 10) – The Week Of The Enigma

24. Virgo III (Sept 11-Sept 18) – The Week Of The Literalist

25. Virgo-Libra Cusp (Sept 19-Sept 24) – The Cusp Of Beauty

26. Libra I (Sept 25-Oct 01) – The Week Of The Perfectionist

27. Libra II (Oct 02-Oct 10) – The Week Of Society

28. Libra III (Oct 11-Oct 18) – The Week Of Theater

29. Libra-Scorpio Cusp (Oct 19-Oct 25) – The Cusp Of Drama & Criticism

30. Scorpio I (Oct 26-Nov 02) – The Week Of Intensity

31. Scorpio II (Nov 03–Nov 11) – The Week Of Depth

32. Scorpio III (Nov 12–Nov 18) – The Week Of Charm

33. Scorpio-Sagittarius Cusp (Nov 19–Nov 24) – The Cusp Of Revolution

34. Sagittarius I (Nov 25–Dec 02) – The Week Of Independence

35. Sagittarius II (Dec 03–-Dec 10) – The Week Of The Originator

36. Sagittarius III (Dec 11-Dec 18) – The Week Of The Titan

37. Sagittarius-Capricorn Cusp (Dec 19-Dec 25) – The Cusp Of Prophecy

38. Capricorn I (Dec 26-Jan 02) – The Week Of The Ruler

39. Capricorn II (Jan 03- Jan 09) – The Week Of Determination

40. Capricorn III (Jan 10-Jan 16) – The Week Of Dominance

41. Capricorn-Aquarius Cusp (Jan 17-Jan 22) – The Cusp Of Mystery & Imagination

42. Aquarius I (Jan 23-Jan 30) – The Week Of Genius

43. Aquarius II (Jan 31-Feb 07) – The Week Of Youth & Ease

44. Aquarius III (Feb 08-Feb 15) – The Week Of Acceptance

45. Aquarius-Pisces Cusp (Feb 16-Feb 22) – The Cusp Of Sensitivity

46. Pisces I (Feb 23-Mar 02) – The Week Of Spirit

47. Pisces II (Mar 03-Mar 10) – The Week Of The Loner

48. Pisces III (Mar 11-Mar 18) – The Week Of Dancers & Dreamers

Birthday Profiles Featured:

25. Gina Gershon (6/10 – Gemini II) 26. Luke Perry (10/11 – Libra III) 27. Molly Ringwald (2/18 – Aquarius-Pisces Cusp) 28. Lochlyn Munro (2/12 – Aquarius III) 29. Nathalie Boltt (7/19 – Cancer-Leo Cusp) 30. Barclay Hope (2/25 – Pisces I)

#25. Gina Gershon (Birthday: Jun. 10, 1962 – The Day Of Laughter & Sadness; Personality Period: Gemini II – Jun. 3 to Jun. 10 – The Week Of The New Language; Place Of Birth: San Fernando Valley, California, United States)

Gemini II’s show a strong desire to communicate their thoughts and feelings verbally. They also need to be sure that others have understood their message and can see their point of view, even without agreeing with it. Yet their means of expression are highly personal, to the point of the development of their own unique language. This may lead to all kinds of problems, tensions and frustrations, since they are frequently misunderstood. Moreover, when trying to put their point across, some use a barrage of words, relying on quantity over quality to win the day, or try different lines of argument all at once. In their intense desire to communicate, their meaning may get lost in the shuffle. Entertaining and witty, Gemini II’s know how to dazzle, and how to hold the attention of their audience. Over the long haul required by committed relationships, however, this manner may lose its glow, being seen first as superficial, then as irritating. Also, their level of verbal and mental insistence may often be so high that others become fatigued or overwhelmed by the barrage. Sensing their urgent need for understanding, people may expediently pretend that they have understood when in fact they have not; this lack of comprehension may emerge later, in midstream, bringing blame and reproach to them. The spoken word is by no means Gmeini II’s only mode of communication. Their body language can be a powerful addition to their well-developed mental characteristics. Gemini II’s have a great need for physical exercise and expression, particularly in their younger years but lasting throughout their lives. Such activities provide the balance to their quick wits without which they might be deprived of sleep and appetite. In addition, healthy doses of affection provide an easy, non-verbal form of communication, making them feel appreciated and loved, and reinforcing their need to share. Gemini II’s competitive urges can easily get out of hand. Competition keeps them sharp but may also make them contentious, and their rapier wit can leave deep scars. Unless they find a way to mute their impulse to criticize, they may alienate even their closest friends. Gemini II’s are equally hard on themselves. When this happens it is often a consequence of poor self-image, perhaps a result of parental accusations of irresponsibility, flakiness or incompetence. If this problem can be corrected their responses will soften. Much of what is at work is a fear of appearing foolish or inadequate, or of being misunderstood. Rejecting old scripts and learning to be easier on themselves, to be happier and more self-accepting and to come to a rapprochement with their own dark side, they can arrive at more productive and fulfilling personal relationships. In their choice of a mate, Gemini II’s are often carried away by their desires and only discover later that the person they have chosen to live with cares little about what they have to say and has no interest in devoting time to listening to it. Gemini II’s can also be drawn to quiet, reserved people whose silence and need for privacy they may, unfortunately, end up interpreting as rejection. Rarely, however, are other fluent communicators as attractive to them as the strong, silent types. Not only do opposites attract, but Gemini II’s are secretly fascinated by the dark side of life. Apparently extroverted and happy, they sometimes force their smiles and gaiety. Driven to repress their shadow personality by fear of rejection, they frequently summon up such a dark side in the form of a lover or friend. A more realistic approach to choosing a partner obviously aids Gemini II’s. Tempted to choose their partners from radically different backgrounds, they often relate more successfully to those from the same city or neighborhood, ethnic background or economic stratum. Shared associations and idioms often free the lines of static and make communication much easier for them. In time, such bonds of commonality can contribute more of lasting value to their relationship than the passion of their dark-side attractions. Gemini II’s have a strong need for variety. Those involved with them are often called upon to provide new horizons and a change of scene, particularly when they lack the organizational talents to get such a project off the ground. They match up well with practical types who can get the job done with little fuss or excitement. Such combinations meld over the long haul, with Gemini II’s providing the innovative ideas while their partners provide the ability to ground, refine and implement them. Building a home base, raising a family and even working as a partner in a business or hobby are all possible results of such relationships. When their needs are not met, Gemini II’s will almost always seek out someone more understanding. If that person is able to maintain objectivity and fairness toward their primary lover, partner or mate, their sympathy may prove beneficial, even a lifesaver, to the primary relationship. Unfortunately, however, the third party is not always so scrupulous, and, consequently, breakups often occur. Gemini II’s must be careful of attracting types who appear sympathetic but are actually pursuing selfish and destructive ends.

For June 10 people, life clearly has its ups and downs. The more successful born on this day manage to synthesize and reconcile opposites (happy and sad, manic and depressed, funny and tragic); the less successful can be driven crazy by pendulum swings from light to dark and back again. For some June10 people it is when they are pushed to desperation that they become most gutsy. One could say that those born on this day aren’t afraid of anything because they are afraid of everything; indeed, they often take tremendous chances trying to bring resolution to dilemmas. Those born on June 10 may seem happy-go-lucky, or at least bittersweet, but if one scratches below the surface a bit, there is a darker side to their life. Through their own experience, highly evolved June 10 people come to have a deep understanding of the interrelationship between light and dark forces in the universe. They develop a capacity to feel both the humor and sadness in the simplest everyday situations, and certainly in socially important ceremonies marking coming of age, marriage, funerals and the like. Less highly evolved June 10 people ride on the same emotional roller coaster, but their experience brings no wider understanding; they have no philosophy that protects them from grief. Dark plutonic and fateful saturnian forces have a strange fascination for June 10 people. Matters of sexuality, death, destruction, passion and violence interest them enormously and can even become a fixation. Indeed, it is fear which attracts and repels them most, because it arouses so many deep, uncontrollable emotions. Many June 10 people hide this fascination behind a smiling, effervescent facade; others are attracted to plutonic personalities who exert a magnetic pull on their repressed dark side. Usually June 10 people’s analytic abilities are highly developed—they love to probe, explore, experiment and theorize. June 10 women, in particular, can appear chaotic and high-strung. They often channel nervous energy into controlling their environment, for example, seeking perfection at work or keeping a spotless home. It may be that this represents an attempt to control disturbances in their consciousness. Both men and women born on June 10 must protect themselves against their fascination with the dark side. If they can integrate such an interest in their work, in a healthy way, they will be both happy and successful. If, on the other hand, they lose themselves in a cheerful public persona while failing to cope with negativity in their private life, this dichotomy splits their nature, creating a kind of Jeckyll and Hyde situation. Laughter and tears, a Pagliacci “laugh clown laugh” scenario may become their lot in life. People born on June 10 are gifted but extreme individuals with strongly held views they are not afraid to express. They have an abundance of talent and ideas, and boundless energy to put them to good use. Everything about them exudes vitality, confidence and charisma but, despite this, they can suffer from bouts of crippling insecurity and self-doubt. They are experts at keeping up a happy front in both their professional and personal lives but underneath they have a serious and intense mind prone to negativity and worry. This dichotomy between public persona and personal fears splits their personality, making it hard for them to feel truly happy and fulfilled. They are unwilling to acknowledge their insecurities to others because it would mean admitting them to themselves. They would rather run, hide or lose themselves in either the confident persona they have created or in sex, passion or violence. But if they faced their inner demons and acknowledged them, they would find a sense of contentment and inner peace. Until the age of forty-one they may focus on emotional security, home and family life; they should take advantage of these opportunities to get in touch with their feelings and build up a network of close friends to whom they can open up. After the age of forty-two they enter a period of increasing self-confidence, authority, strength and self-expression. If during this period they make sure they don’t avoid problems or let other people walk all over them, these are the years where they are most likely to develop their talents successfully and really come into their own. Above all, people born on this day should not underestimate their ability to cope in life because they are capable of bold and daring action once they confront their obstacles directly. The greatest challenge for them will be confronting their inner fears. Once they find the courage to do that, they will discover within themselves a powerhouse of creativity and star potential to achieve not just one, but all of their amazing dreams. People born on June 10 do have a tendency to have more than one love interest hanging around, but for the sake of their own happiness they need to learn to make up their mind and commit to one special person. They are often attracted to intelligent personalities who can help teach them to develop a more serious attitude to love. People born on this day have self-destructive tendencies and they need to make sure that they stay away from recreational drugs, drink, alcohol, and violence. Depression is another danger, and the way to avoid that is to make sure that they surround themselves with optimistic and positive people, not those who will flatter them insincerely and ultimately drag them down. As far as diet is concerned, they need to aim for variety and as many cooked meals as possible instead of eating on the go. Exercise is essential as it will help them release pent-up anger and frustration, boosting their mood. Brisk walking is particularly recommended, as are dancing, swimming and cycling. They are prone to respiratory infections and should also watch out for injuries to their arms and hands. Wearing, meditating on and surrounding themselves with the color green will help them feel less split and more in balance. These people have tremendous energy and stamina, being well suited to careers in live theater as well as the military or the police. They may also excel at public relations, diplomacy, sales, education, journalism, photography, or any career that involves plenty of variety and change, as they do not like routine.��The life path of people born on this day is to learn to deal with their fears. Once they have found the courage to be themselves, their destiny is to develop their innovative and inspirational potential. People born specifically on the 10th of June are presumed to be chatty, witty and youthful with the competitive assertiveness typical to Gemini's. The ruling astrological planet for this particular day is our Sun giving you high levels of independence, persistence and generosity. If you have this birthday a natural rhythm makes you a music lover and bestows you with a creative streak. You are usually agile and versatile with an abundance of talents and energy that compliment your innovative expressive nature. Practical, friendly and disciplined you possess a strong will but also tend to constantly seek the approval of others. Individuals with a June the tenth birthday are intellectual and curious with a need to be knowledgeable. Your mental sharpness encourages you to be always looking to learn something new to satisfy your dislike of sameness and boredom. Full of ambition and determination you are highly motivated and destined to succeed. Work choice to a person born on the tenth of June is often seen as an opportunity to show off their best faculties. Your love of learning and ambitiousness inspire you to have the patience to study long and hard to be qualified for and enter a preferred profession. As a rule rate of pay and hours are not as important to you as job satisfaction. Your commendable math skills can sometimes direct career preferences and ordinarily means that you are particularly good at managing your finances. While working you are happiest in a setting where you feel appreciated and valued for your effort and imput. For a Gemini the person born on the tenth day of June is typically optimistic and adventurous concerning the subject of romance. Your bubbly youthfulness makes you a true romantic but you can be a bit idealistic and superficial in choosing the perfect partner until you realize that beauty is only skin deep. Naturally playful and passionate you require a high degree of fun and variety to keep your interest in a personal relationship. You are usually very sociable and quite a bit more ardent and sensual than many other twins. A strong physical attraction is essential in a long term soul mate partnership. Spontaneous and impulsive you desire a lover who is as keen as you to talk freely about and participate in sexual fantasies. Although you are inclined to be a loyal and loving mate you have the tendency to occasionally jump to jealous conclusions. Illness is rarely experienced by those born on June 10th due to your common sense attitude to the importance of maintaining healthiness. Your usual active energetic physical and emotional zest for life fills you with positivity helping keep you in tip top condition. This healthy approach is coupled with a sensible preference for wholesome natural foods and regular exercise. If you do succumb to a health complaint it is likely that you will be quick to recover and soon regain your vitality. People born on this day may be especially prone to suffer from low mood if they spend too much time alone. Your main strengths of character are seen in the independent, daring and capable elements within your temperament. These qualities and your talented versatility allow you to competently and confidently go your own way. Your competitiveness, practicality and motivation are additional fortes that let you stand out and be noticed. Personality weaknesses for those born on June 10th have the inclination to appear more often when you are feeling rather upset, angry or bored. On these occasions your negative tendencies become apparent and you will usually display overemotional, erratic and irritable behavior. Being born on the 10th of June favors you with plenty of curiosity and a sharp mentality giving you plenty of aspirations. Despite your wide range of abilities you do not always have the confidence to aim higher without some kind of inspiration. An influential person or event can sometimes give you the push you need to accomplish desirable goals. Your touch of artistic flair and sense of adventure may be significant features in some of your personalized dreaming. Your wishes for success in all areas of life seems to be partly inspired by vivid things that you remember from the contents of your dreams. As you were born on the tenth day of the month your birth date figures total to a Root number of One. This numerical reference to your birthday has the keyword ' Drive' emphasizing your ambitious, inventive and assertive traits. In Tarot the 10th Major Arcana card illustrating the Wheel of Fortune is mystically associated with your birthday. This signifies your ability to cope well with wins and losses experienced in life. The lucky gem for June the tenth birthdays is thought to be a Ruby. Wearing this precious stone promises to increase calmness, decrease tension and magically attract wealth. Astrologically the planet Mercury is imagined primarily accountable for the probable personalities of the typified Gemini. The actual day you were born on, the tenth of June is dominated by the cosmic rule of the Sun. Therefore your differentness is believed predicted by the influences of these two planets. Your self reliant expressiveness and discipline guides you to be decisive and controlled but not pushy with it. Your talkative friendliness and enthusiastic outlook are ideal characteristics for getting along with almost everyone you meet. If you can try and minimize your reactions to distress, temper and periods of inactivity there is not much else to improve upon in your delightful disposition. A completing thought for people born on June the 10th is to attempt to integrate your ideas and actions more effectively if you wish to fulfill your full potential.

#26. Luke Perry (Birthday: Oct. 11, 1966 – The Day Of Gracious Ease; Personality Period: Libra III – Oct. 11 to Oct. 18 – The Week Of Theater; Place Of Birth: Mansfield, Ohio, United States)

If “all the world’s a stage,” as Shakespeare wrote, then Libra III’s are some of the finest players upon it. Acting out the drama of their own lives in everyday affairs is their specialty. They know the value of image in their professional lives and spend a lot of time working on how they present themselves to the world. Their detachment, even coolness, may sometimes irritate or infuriate those around them, but it is misleading; if they seem to lack affect, this is usually a result of a studied and rigorous training they put themselves through. These are actually very emotional people. Hardheaded, Libra III’s may stick to the same course for years, whether it is right for them or wrong. Their drive to move ahead at any cost makes them mistrust silence and repose; they prefer doing to thinking. Libra III’s mistakes can consequently be big ones, since they may give themselves wholeheartedly and sometimes prematurely to an endeavour without either analyzing and planning it or tuning in to their intuitions about it beforehand. Accidents of all types may well result from this unheeding attitude. Leadership qualities are often highly developed in Libra III’s, who typically find themselves at the head of a social group or business. Once again, however, in leading a family or assuming an executive role they may act with a certain hubris or sense of infallibility, neglecting to gauge the effects of their actions on co-workers, employees or relatives. On top of this, if they are finally forced to face failure they may be confronting something they had hitherto considered an impossibility, and the shock can prove too much for them. Those who can cultivate true humility with respect to their fellow humans will be much happier in the long run. If Libra III’s have faced great disappointment, they may become cynical. Such world-weary individuals can be revived through love and affection, but these are the very qualities they usually find most difficult to share. Opening their hearts to a trusted friend or family member is essential to their psychological well-being. Perhaps psychological help is the obvious solution, but most are resistant to it. In times of trouble, the loved ones of Libra III’s must often assume a heavy load indeed, knowing that they and they alone are keeping their partners going. Worldliness is perhaps their greatest strength; Libra III’s know how, knowledge and experience give them the confidence they need to enjoy the challenges of their chosen field. Almost invariably specialists or experts of some kind, Libra III’s are quite capable of dominating their professional field. They have a need to be well informed, and if they are ignorant in some area, they characteristically make this a challenge to learn. Although hardheaded, they will give consideration to any idea, no matter how far out, not out of a sense of fairness but because of the chance that it will contribute something to their knowledge. To them, knowledge is power. Difficulties arise in Libra III’s personal relationships when their lovers or mates feel neglected. In truth, they are not terribly interested in other people, or in their feelings, and although they suffer exceedingly when misunderstood, they seldom go out of their way to understand others. Libra III’s are uncomfortable when heavy emotional expectations are put on them, and they either withdraw or flee. They see themselves as serious, responsible and ethical, but they may relate more immediately to other people’s ideas or values, and what these represent, than to who these people actually are. Libra III’s friends or mates may have to play a subordinate role, since these folks usually take centre stage. Yet they also have a needy side, and they often do best in relationships with strong, even dominant personalities whom they can lean on. When someone becomes partially or completely dependent on them, on the other hand, they can become uncomfortable and restless, longing to escape. They must feel able to assume and discharge responsibilities generously and of their own accord, rather than being forced to do so. The masculine and the feminine come together strongly in these individuals. They can be extremely intense in the bedroom, an area that permits their full range of emotional expression. Once released, however, these passions may well spill over in anger and upset, which they vent on their partner in the form of arguments replete with recrimination and blame. Their anger is violent but for the most part mercifully short-lived, for they are not inclined to bring strife into their daily lives. Probably the best thing that can happen emotionally to those born during the Week of Theater is to be or become an active member of a family group that can provide the affection, support and appreciation these hard-driving individualists need. The problem is, many of them are not particularly interested in families—whether spouses, children or their own parents. As a substitute, they may seek to live, work or play with a group of long-standing friends whom they trust and respect. Even so, their workaholic tendencies will often prevent them from spending a great deal of time with whatever group or individual they choose to live with, and may in fact reflect their true preference—to live alone.

Those born on October 11 have vivid imaginations, like excitement, want to be at the center of what is going on and feel that they must play an important social role. However, their sensuous and pleasure-loving nature often holds them back. Finding their proper place in the world is of the utmost importance to them, and well it should be, since career is an area in which difficulties abound for October 11 people. In fact, they may have to change jobs with regularity until they find the occupation for which they are best suited. Regardless of career, the bottom line for those born on this day is social involvement, for they are highly averse to an isolated lifestyle. Their fate is intimately tied up with that of their fellow human beings, so much so that they may perform well in the role of group or personal representative. October 11 people can be too nice and easygoing. Part of the reason for their career indecision, or for their tendency to settle for whatever happens to come along, is that they do not have a whole lot of intense and directed (or for that matter, selfish) ambition. Because they do not enjoy complications, they may not choose to present themselves with challenges. Being basically comfortable and happy, developing a lifestyle where they may easily divide their attentions between their career, love life, family affairs, and forms of relaxation and enjoyment is fulfillment enough. October 11 people enjoy working with others and being part of a team. Their likeable personality makes it possible for them to move freely from one social or work stratum to the next. They have a way of feeling at home with the highest or lowest level of society, and those who have had the advantages of wealth or education rarely appear snobbish or elitist. October 11 people must not allow themselves to be imposed upon or manipulated by more intense, better directed types who know what they want and will do what they have to do to get it. Admittedly, those born on this day will generally give friends and even acquaintances a second (or third) chance when trespassed upon. October 11 people should perhaps examine their motives in this regard: if they do so from a position of strength, such accepting behaviour may not only be healthy but an indication of spiritual development; on the other hand, if there are masochistic urges working, changes should be made. When October 11 people are truly satisfied with what they have, they experience a kind of bliss unknown to most people. Not having big problems with acceptance, however, does not guarantee that other areas of their spiritual life are so well developed. Therefore, they must summon the energy needed for self-understanding and personal evolution, or they will surely stagnate. People born on October 11 tend to be attractive and popular people. They are masters of the art of socializing, at their happiest and best when they are at the center of a group of colleagues or friends. Their style is easygoing and elegant, and their likeable personality enables them to mix with people of all ages and all walks of life. Others may envy the ease with which they merge into a group, strike up a conversation with a newcomer, advance up the career ladder, and ascend into the highest social circles. But underneath their graceful exterior, people born on this day may feel as if something important is missing. It’s important for them to listen to this feeling because what’s missing is personal ambition. Although their upbeat personality attracts popularity and position, they tend to drift into these positions rather than having clearly defined personal goals. As a result they may feel as if they have very little control over their lives; their aversion to conflict or challenge is even more damaging, because a little challenge and suffering in their lives will help them learn and grow emotionally. Until the age of forty-two there is an emphasis in their lives on emotional change and a need for personal power. During these years they need to take advantage of opportunities to challenge themselves professionally and personally, because challenge is the key to their success. After the age of forty-three there is a turning point when they are likely to widen their interests, feel more free, and seek inspiration through study, relationships or travel. Again the key to their success and fulfillment will be their willingness to take calculated risks and embrace challenge. This is because once they discover within themselves a drive to achieve and the courage to avoid the temptation of always taking the safest or most popular route, their outstanding grace, humanity and intellect will ensure that they don’t just appear to be leading a charmed life—they will actually feel as if they are living it. People born on October 11 rarely have problems attracting romantic admirers, although a tendency to alternate between being an intense and passionate lover and a need to feel like a free agent can cause problems in long-term relationships. It’s important for them to be discriminating in their choice of partner, choosing someone for reasons other than looks and popularity. People born on this day need to take extra special care of their health because they can be delicate. They may, for example, need more sleep and rest than others and it may take them longer than normal to recover from an illness. Music can be extremely therapeutic for them, as can aromatherapy oils and dancing. There is a tendency for them to be sedentary so they need to make an effort to incorporate more activity into their daily lives, scheduling a regular program of exercise at least four or five times a week; walking is particularly recommended. They also need to avoid addictive substances like alcohol, tobacco and caffeine, and to satisfy their sweet tooth with fruit or seeds instead of chocolate. Meditation techniques will help them strengthen their will-power, and wearing, meditating on and surrounding themselves with the color blue will encourage them to imagine, plan and create clear goals for themselves. These people may take some time to settle into a career and there may also be several career changes in their lifetime. They have the potential to flourish in many careers including writing, music, sport, social reform, sales, promotion, commerce, counselling, teaching, training, law, politics, advertising, art, design, and the media. The life path of people born on this day is to nurture personal ambitions. Once they have discovered what will give their life meaning, their destiny is to be a teacher or innovator in their chosen field. People born specifically on the 11th of October are believed to be charming, friendly cooperative spirits with plenty of the usual Libra diplomacy and niceness. The ruling astrological planet for this particular day is our Moon giving you a knack of putting others at ease and understanding all sides of an argument. If you have this birthday, determined and focused your intellectual thoughts and actions are predicted to be highly imaginative and creative. Warm and loving on the inside with a dislike of solitude you are also usually a bit idealistic as well as cool and a little insecure emotionally too. Keen to lend a hand to anyone in need your good deeds may be genuine but you should be careful not to be too nice or easygoing. Individuals with an October the eleventh birthday are sweet and sensitive yet strong and often very good at dividing their time equally between commitments. Although your nature is immensely helpful and giving you sometimes could have a problem accepting assistance from others. Following a career involving some type of media is a common job choice to a person born on the Eleventh of October. The profession you choose is likely to be connected to your talent in art or your likelihood to be rather expressive with words. Aside from these preferences your naturally helpful temperament usually prefers and really enjoys working as part of a team. Pacing yourself and prioritizing helps you normally juggle and evenly balance work and home responsibilities. You seem to strive for a luxurious lifestyle but may occasionally encounter financial or credit issues as a result of a tendency for frivolous spending. For a Libra, the person born on the eleventh day of October is typically in search of a devoted soul mate to share insecurities in addition to plans for a great future. A bit shy but with a big heart you are inclined to like romancing but could be a tad embarrassed by surprises or presents. Your relationship is important to you so you are prepared to cope with the emotional ups and downs and treat a special loved one gently and kindly. Intently loyal and compassionate you are at your best and tend to truly flourish when paired up as one half of a long term love partnership. In the bedroom you will usually be incredibly sensuous and certainly know how to flirt but you will put a partners desires and satisfaction before your own. An erotic imagination and adventurous streak along with your fondness of lavish comforts and refined tastes make sexual fantasies something that really turns you on. Exercising on a regular basis is commonly the key to the typical healthiness experienced by those born on October 11th. Exercise not only keeps you toned and fit it also helps strengthen your overall alertness and willpower. You should perhaps keep an eye on your diet and try to match it with your daily activity level and remember to drink enough water every day. Your back and kidneys are prone to be weak spots so be careful not to strain either of these by overexertion or dehydration. People born on this day should listen to their body when it signals it is tired as they have a proneness to be quite clumsy or nervy if particularly fatigued. Your main strengths of character are predicted to be seen in your mix of charm and friendliness as these fortes increase your degrees of cooperation. These positive traits and your intellect and creativity allow you to think outside the box also intensifying the supportive assistance you impart to others. Situations that make you feel anxious are likely to provoke the personality weaknesses for those born on October 11th. These negative tendencies are usually based on the increasing of the slight coolness of your emotional reactions. Additionally your attitude may become somewhat stubbornly smug and inactive in response to anxiety. Being born on the 11th of October means you will ordinarily have a tendency to plan ahead and so usually set a few goals for guidance. Setting yourself objectives is the perfect way to help organize your time for desired achievements. You appear to express oneself best artistically or via written communication. Doing something that does not involve a financial reward is often much more satisfying for you personally. When it comes to dreaming you are easily able to imagine visionary scenes of things that you know make you happy. Your dreams grant you regular fresh ideas and motivation to succeed. As you were born on the eleventh day of the month the double one in your birth date qualifies you for a Root number of Two. This numerical reference to your birthday has the keyword 'Harmony' reflecting your usual willingness to cooperate. In Tarot the 11th Major Arcana card depicting Justice is closely associated with your birthday. This represents your natural honesty, fairness and the integrity in one's beliefs you possess. The lucky gemstone for October the eleventh birthdays is a Pearl. Typified Libra personalities are anticipated to be astrologically derived from the assumed powerful influence of the planet Venus. The actual day you were born on, the eleventh of October, is governed by the equally influential Moon's dominance. The blend of sweetness and sensitivity in your outlook usually get your sincere idealism noticed and heard. If you can manage to minimize reactional distress caused by fear or misfortune by not panicking it will assist you to retain your positivity. A finishing thought for people born on October the 11th suggests keeping your eyes on the stars but also your feet firmly on the ground for maximum progress.

#27. Molly Ringwald (Birthday: Feb. 18, 1968 – The Day Of The Complete Picture; Personality Period: Aquarius-Pisces Cusp – Feb. 16 to Feb. 22 – The Cusp Of Sensitivity; Place Of Birth: Roseville, California, United States)

Aquarius-Pisces Cusp are often success-oriented individuals who give top priority to their career. They are usually fighters, an attitude sometimes based on underlying insecurity and the need to prove themselves. A chip-on-the-shoulder attitude many have makes them aggressive toward others and belligerent when attacked. A great personal challenge, then, is to rediscover and acknowledge their inner makeup and to break down some of the barriers they have built up. The tough, even aggressive exterior they present belies the sensitive personality inside. Extremely vulnerable as children, Aquarius-Pisces Cusp react to criticism or abuse from others by building a wall around themselves. Carried with them into adulthood, this armour may give the impression of an inner self far different from the reality. It should not be surprising that many orient themselves to one of two extremes: either the most far-out, idealistic pursuits or the most inner, deep, profound ones. Combining such essentially opposite attitudes may be extremely difficult, and many will swing from one to the other. In their work, for example, they may deal with abstract concerns, or with attempts to surpass objective limitations, while in their private lives they delve into the world of feelings, people and human affairs. Important as it is for Aquarius-Pisces to reconcile these two extremes in their nature, they should also work to explore the middle ground between them—the social side of life. Being strung between the poles of the physical and the metaphysical often means neglecting interaction with other people. Aquarius-Pisces may be closely bound to their families. Although parental disapproval and criticism will hurt them in childhood, strong emotional bonds tie them to mother, father, or both. (Usually the stronger and most influential relationship is with the parent of the opposite sex.) Breaking free of such attachments is essential if they are to emerge into adulthood as unique individuals—a truth, perhaps, for many of us, but adolescence may be particularly rebellious and stormy for Aquarius-Pisces. Those who do not succeed in breaking away during this time may continue their struggle for the rest of their lives, even after the death of parents or other powerful family elders. Particularly in matters of love, Aquarius-Pisces will have to struggle to be open, honest and accepting with their partner, and to allow themselves to be vulnerable, even at the risk of pain. Thus personal relationships may have the effect of putting them back in touch with their essential self. Even those who are forceful and hard-driving in their careers may be quite passive in their personal relationships. In addition, a tendency to display both masculine and feminine qualities in their love relationships can mark these males as atypically sensitive and these females as atypically aggressive. Such role reversals often favor their choosing a mate they perceive as their opposite. In relationships, fear of rejection figures prominently, for Aquarius-Pisces want to be liked but are often afraid of getting hurt, or don’t know how to go about getting approval without compromising themselves. For some, a show of pessimism or dissatisfaction guards them against having to interact; others appear more pleasant or agreeable, but this, too, is a facade designed to preclude any deep involvement. Gaining the courage to struggle in their personal relationships as forcefully as in their careers, to risk rejection, stand up for themselves and express their emotions powerfully, are challenges that they must eventually meet. Friendship may be an important vehicle for bringing Aquarius-Pisces Cusp out into the world, enticing them to participate in club, community, philanthropic and school endeavours. The essential role that friends play goes beyond normal fellowship, companionship and personal sharing. Beyond having a small number of friends, they gain by building bridges with colleagues, co-workers, acquaintances and with more remote family members. By developing their people skills, they will widen their humanity and ease feelings of being isolated and misunderstood. Viewing the suffering of others first-hand can help them realize that the unhappiness they have gone through themselves is in no way unique, allowing the human points of identification they desperately need. Building their own family, including children, or living in a family situation is often a positive experience for those born during the Week of Sensitivity, although their need to be alone and their difficulty in regular or intense interactions may make such relationships hard for them to maintain. Still, Aquarius-Pisces nurturing qualities need to be expressed in some area of their lives—if not through family, perhaps through pets or career projects. Expressing their care, concern and sympathy is as necessary to them as are love and passion.

The magnetic individuals born on February 18 enliven their surroundings with their ideas and energy. Not ones to get bogged down in details, they stand back in order to see the whole picture, the big view. Rarely will they make important decisions until they have heard every side of the story. Their life is not a haphazard series of events, nor are they overly fatalistic about accepting what comes along. Behind everything they do is an underlying philosophy of life, a basic set of principles for living which they do not betray. Because they are so convinced of these core values, it may be difficult or impossible for them to change greatly. However, because of their sincere desire to know the truth, they are usually open to listening to various points of view, if only to learn from them. Because of their far-reaching views and well-directed ambitions, February 18 people may overlook certain trivial or meaningless details which in fact have great importance, if not to themselves then to others. Indeed, some born on this day can get a little out of touch with the facts of everyday existence. They may grow impatient with housework, maintenance of property or the handling of their financial affairs. Through taking what others may feel is an aloof or superior attitude they can arouse jealousy or enmity. Although it is true that February 18 people are often self-assured, highly autonomous individuals who need a great deal of time to themselves, they rarely cut themselves off from their fellow human beings or resist calls for help. They are empathic and sympathetic, but only up to a point, however, for they are not willing to sacrifice their time or their ideals to unnecessary demands or claiming attitudes. Most February 18 people have problems with emotional hypersensitivity in childhood and in extreme cases may be pushed in one of two directions: either withdrawing from the cares and suffering of the world and perfecting their personal vision of how a utopia should be, or building a tough steel-like exterior and taking on the world. In either case, they nonetheless move in the direction of maximizing both the scope and influence of their ideas. If February 18 people can remain fixed on long-term goals, but at the same time attend to the daily business of the physical world, they will be successful. If they get sidetracked, however, because of an inability to control their emotions and sensitivities, they will probably flounder and be unhappy. Having the willpower and toughness to see plans through while at the same time preserving their sensitivity is the key to self-realization for them. Whatever their age, people born on February 18 never grow old in their minds and hearts. With a charismatic energy about them, they never fail to brighten up their surroundings with their infectious optimism and enthusiasm for new ideas and projects, however far-fetched and impossible. Those who are born on this day are also courageous risk-takers. They will always be the first to volunteer or put themselves forward, loving nothing better than to live life on the edge. There is of course a danger with this reckless approach to life; it can lead them into serious trouble and on more than one occasion it will do just that. They are never happier than when they are pushing things one degree harder, higher or faster, but they do need to ask themselves why they feel the need to live like this. More often than not deep-seated fears and insecurities are hidden behind their mask of indestructibility. With their youthful spirit and the endearing vulnerabilities that go with it, these people don’t really understand that other people will be drawn to their sunny optimism. They may even find that others look to them for leadership but they aren’t always happy in that role as it hinders their freedom to experience and explore the wonders of the world. Although their life does sparkle with variety and adventure, there is a price to pay. One day they may find themselves looking at their life and wondering why they haven’t got a sense of real achievement. It is important for them to learn to focus their energies rather than scattering them; fortunately, after the age of thirty-two they become more assertive and self-disciplined in their daily affairs. As long as people born on this day avoid looking in the wrong direction for a sense of risk and adventure, and understand that showing off isn’t the most fulfilling or grown-up way to gain supporters, they have the potential to win the admiration and respect of others, and most important of all a sense of pride in themselves and their achievements. People born on February 18 tend to have an immature approach to love, believing that showing off or being the center of attention is a way to win hearts. They need to learn that being calm and in control is a far more effective approach to relationships, as it puts other people naturally at ease. Once they do find a partner, one thing is assured: their partner will never be bored. The relentlessly upbeat and youthful approach to life that people born on this day are blessed with helps them keep illness and aging at bay. They don’t grow old, they just get better or some might say crazier. The biggest risk to their health is their addiction to thrill seeking and they should avoid overindulgence in extreme sports, as well as addictive pastimes such as gambling, drinking and drug-taking. Knowing when to stop is an important lesson for them to learn in all aspects of their life, diet, exercise and general health included. Learning to cook properly would not only improve their diet, which tends to be irregular, but it would also be extremely therapeutic as it encourages them to slow down and think about what they are putting into their bodies. Wearing, meditating on or surrounding themselves with the color blue will help bring calmness and control into their lives. These people need to have careers that give them plenty of freedom to express their original thoughts. Multi-talented, they will therefore flourish in any career, provided they can follow their own path but may be particularly drawn to business, public relations, publishing, writing, journalism, the leisure industry, music, acting, and the world of entertainment. The life path of people born on this day is to learn the importance of self-discipline. When they have learned a degree of calm, their destiny is to motivate others with their enthusiasm and crazy energy. People born specifically on the 18th of February are inclined to be quite friendly, helpful and sympathetic with lots of Aquarian independence. The astrological planet ruling this particular day is Mars creating highly absorbed personalities who are persuasive communicators. Your humanitarian beliefs, quick intellect and charitable manner is accompanied by a strong need to correct, repair or rearrange. If you have this birthday it bestows on you a natural curiosity, so lots will interest you and it makes you highly perceptive to the needs of others. You are a bit more caring and compassionate than other water bearers as well as quieter and more contemplative. Individual's with a February the eighteenth birthday are good at relating to others but can also be a touch too idealistic at times. You have an instinctively fine sense of direction that helps channel your energies positively and progress through life with much optimism. Work preferences to a person born on the Eighteenth of February are often a well thought out decision decided early in life. You usually have the patience and dedication to study for something you really want to do. A job's salary is usually not as important as the work's humanitarian ethics due to your benevolent deep thinking. This and your practicality tend to steer you towards professions that help make a difference to peoples life's. Where finances are concerned you sometimes try to live beyond your means and can occasionally have problems balancing your budget following an impulsive spending spree. For an Aquarian, the person born on the eighteenth day of February is notably sensitive and perceptive emotionally. This extra sensitivity is possibly down to your birth date falling close to the cusp of dreamy Pisces. It can however also make you a bit more critical in your judgments than the majority in your zodiac set. You are rather selective with your friendships and ordinarily a private person who will probably have reservations about intimacy. This hesitancy does not normally prevent you from coming across as charming, outgoing and flirty nor does it dampen your enthusiasm to find your destined soul mate. You are patient and prepared to wait for the right person to come along before committing to a long term relationship. Once attached you aspire to be the perfect partner who is lovingly attentive, romantic and extremely faithful. Health problems experienced by those born on February 18th are generally few as you seem to adopt good habits at a young age. You tend to instinctively know what is beneficial for you personally in your diet and as a rule have a great attitude to exercise. A daily workout for you can be in the form of anything from a full gym session to a long walk or a swim. Eating plenty of fruit, vegetables and grains will help you maintain your weight at a healthy level. Your only vice is the tendency to be soon distracted from your well being routine by other things that may be more fun but not as good for you. Strengths of your character lie mainly in your very responsive alluring nature and your deep rational thought processes. These qualities in your individuality make you approachable, friendly, reasonable and able to stay calm especially in the face of difficulties. Personality weaknesses for those born on February 18th are found in two areas. Firstly, you have a proneness to be somewhat aloof and isolate yourself if upset. Secondly, although you are usually composed and understanding there are occasions when you can also be in a negative frame of mind and untypically impatient and prone to sulking. Being born on the 18th of February gives you a goal orientated focus and a strong determination to succeed in your ambitions. You set yourself challenges, sometimes unrealistic ones and can be a little too tough on yourself if you fail to accomplish them. Your high moral standards make you strive to be a supportive spouse and parent and this is often one of your fondest wishes. Aside from the usual dreams of financial security and true love you yearn to do something meaningful with your life. Your dreams and goals are excellent motivators that perfectly compliment your directional instincts. As you were born on the eighteenth day of the month the total of the digits in your birth date equate to a Root number of Nine. The keyword for this numerical reference to your birthday is 'Seeker' and it emphasizes your curious, purposeful side. The Tarot card most associated with your birthday is the 18th in the Major Arcana representing the Moon. This is a possible symbol of your visionary emotions and abundance of empathy. The lucky gemstone worn specially for February the eighteenth birthdays is the Bloodstone. It is thought to increase courage and is said to guard its wearer against deceptions. As an Aquarian your basic personality is believed to be greatly influenced astrologically by the celestial body Uranus. The actual day you were born on, the eighteenth of February is governed by the planet Mars bestowing you with your effective communication and alertness. It is the combination of these 2 planetary influences that create the likelihood of your specific temperament. Your optimistic reformist outlook and thoughtfulness are paired with a heightened perception allowing you to be noticed and listened to. If you can stay in a positive mood by taking care of yourself and finding some 'me' time you can normally conquer your tendencies to appear detached or irritable. A closing thought pertinent to people born on February the 18th is to try not cut yourself off from the world or have your head too often in the clouds.

#28. Lochlyn Munro (Birthday: Feb. 12, 1966 – The Day Of The Unifier; Personality Period: Aquarius III – Feb. 8 to Feb. 15 – The Week Of Acceptance; Place Of Birth: Lac La Hache, British Columbia, Canada)

The theme of acceptance runs strong in the lives of Aquarius III’s. Some of them are hardheaded and not particularly open to unusual ideas and people but become increasingly tolerant as the years go by. Others are overly accepting from an early age and allow themselves to be unduly manipulated or influenced by stronger, more selfish types. The challenge for Aquarius III’s is to remain open to the world while at the same time retaining the ability to be selective in screening out harmful influences. Having dealt with some of their own prejudices, Aquarius III’s often become champions of the underdog. They despise intolerance and unfair treatment in any form. They also react instinctively against those who put on airs, or pretend to be something they are not. Poking holes in other people’s balloons is often their specialty, and if they carry this tendency to an extreme, they can be extremely cutting and hurtful. The reasons for this behaviour may be found in a low self-image, perhaps reflecting negative parental attitudes expressed toward them in childhood. Aquarius III anger is sudden and explosive but rarely lasts for long. Friends and family usually realize that it is often better for all concerned if they can get their aggression and dissatisfaction out in one go rather than letting it simmer inside. These resourceful individuals are rarely at a loss for new ideas. Perhaps because they get themselves into difficult or challenging situations so often, they learn early on how to extricate themselves from dilemmas. That they often create and solve their own problems makes them like two mythological figures rolled into one: Daedalus, who created the labyrinth, and Ariadne, who showed Theseus how to get out of it. In a basic sense, these folks are their own worst enemy. Rarely at rest for long, Aquarius III’s love activity and movement. Their liveliness is an extremely positive trait as far as their friends are concerned, and they are often sought out for their attractiveness, unusual demeanor and colorful language. The downside of their character is more often felt by their families than by their associates, for it is in the daily task of living with others that their greatest problems often arise. They may be constantly annoyed with family members, and because they do not rate high in self-awareness, Aquarius III’s may fail to see perhaps it is actually they who are the annoying ones. Easily affected by what others say and do, a bad remark or look can easily set Aquarius III’s on the wrong foot for a few hours or even ruin their whole day. They are particularly vulnerable to personal attack. They can stand any amount of criticism of their unusual ideas and, in fact, defend themselves well but may fly apart when dealing with people who can push their emotional buttons. Learning to be less vulnerable to ad hominem arguments, and to laugh off the negativity of others, whether it is intentional or not, is important if they are to maintain their psychic balance. Humor, irony and wit often appear in abundance in Aquarius III’s. These are among the mechanisms by which they are able to survive in an often difficult and hostile world. Another method they may use is the making of silent promises to themselves not to make the same mistake again, or to better their lives through positive action. Making plans and resolutions of all sorts for the future enables them to get through trying times. Above all, they know that no matter how bad things get, tomorrow is another day. In this respect, they view the future as potentially positive and self-renewing. In the present, on the other hand, Aquarius III’s may get into a hopeless state in which they believe that everything has gone wrong. Friends stand by helpless while they complain about their own deficiencies, and about the unfair treatment they receive from the world. If they have negative attitudes about themselves, these can involve feelings of shame that may be focused on their bodies or on mistakes they feel they have made. Such attitudes are empowered by guilt. Yet although they may blame themselves constantly, they can rarely hear reproach from others without a strong defensive reaction, perhaps involving a reciprocal attack on the accuser. Learning to listen to the suggestions of concerned family members may be almost impossible for them; it is easier for them to take advice from friends, or even strangers. People born during the Week of Acceptance may be extremely affectionate to others and may crave love themselves. Love is apparently hard for them to find, however, since they are constantly in search of it. Aquarius III’s are rarely able to find the right person for themselves before the age of thirty, if at all. Their needs often demand a wide range of partners, associates, mates or friends. They are not easily satisfied and often bored. Their need for attention may run high, and the danger here is that they become the eternal butterfly, flitting from one delicious flower to the next. Aquarius III’s non-attachment is not in itself a negative trait—on the contrary, it is a lesson that all of us have to learn sooner or later. For them, however, the lessons that need to be learned are those of constancy, consistency, application and dedication.

February 12 people display a marked ability to unify disparate elements in their environment. Whether bringing together a troubled family, healing a rift between friends or demonstrating leadership to resolve disputes in organizations, they can often be found bridging the gaps between people. Does this make them team players? Not exactly. Those born on this day usually assess a given situation from their own standpoint and if they have the authority to do so chart the course for the group. It is less in their nature to build consensus. However, this is not to imply that they ignore or undervalue what others think. It is just that they often feel that they have already assimilated most points of view and come to a conclusion as to the best course of action. Having reached such a determination, they are then highly influential in persuading others to follow their lead. February 12 people are many-sided individuals with varied talents and therefore an added challenge for them is to unite the disparate facets of their own personality. Too often their versatility works against them and subverts their purpose in organizing their career and personal concerns. Furthermore, their stubbornness once they have made up their mind and a refusal to change course can create difficulties. Faced with problems they may just try to ram their way through rather than seek compromise. Because they so often think in absolute terms, it can be difficult for February 12 people to retaliate. Yet this is precisely what they must do if they wish to perceive the truth of a given situation. Although they may wish to remain faithful to their original ethical principles, they must also learn the importance of changing to meet new circumstances and listening carefully to well-thought-out suggestions and observations made along the way by co-workers or associates. Not uncommonly February 12 people grow comfortable with one codified point of view which becomes a framework or working philosophy for them that directs their thinking. However, if they can bring themselves to periodically examine this outlook, to see if it has stood the test of time, they will strengthen their ideas and divest them of many illusions and misconceptions. The most highly evolved of February 12 people eventually discard those theories that cease to function for them. Undoubtedly, the efforts of February 12 people to bring people together can do much good. However, letting things change, grow or even fall apart of their own accord is sometimes a more appropriate response. Just walking away or quitting goes against the grain for most February 12 people, but they may come to realize that the greatest courage can sometimes be demonstrated in following the path of nonaction. Those born on February 12 have a talent for integration; they have the ability to marshal all the available information, evaluate opposing viewpoints and then bring everything and everyone together in a united front. Nothing matters more to them than the status quo and if need be they will boldly and courageously defend it. This makes them highly valued in both their professional and their personal lives. People born on this day like to see themselves in the role of peacekeeper, pointing others in the right direction; that direction is, of course, the one they believe to be correct. This isn’t to say that they are stubborn and inflexible, but they possess the tendency to ignore what others think and to believe that the best course of action is always their own. It is important for them to recognize the importance of consensus and to understand that although their ability to see and evaluate the bigger picture more than qualifies them to take the lead, great leadership is not about dictatorship but about motivating others in the direction you want them to go. As well as being able to unite others and see the way forward with singleminded tenacity, people born on this day have a host of other talents, including confidence, originality and creativity. They do need to be careful that their talents don’t cause them to squander their energies in many different directions. Until their late thirties there are opportunities for them to develop greater self-awareness, but in their forties and beyond there is a focus on personal integration and purpose; in many ways, this is when these people really come into their own. People with a February 12 birthday have strong convictions and a pro-gressive instinct, both of which have been developed through their powers of original thought, and high moral and ethical standards. They have the courage and charisma to lead and inspire others, and more often than not others will find them living out their mission to make the world a better and more peaceful place. Although people born on February 12 have no trouble falling in love, they do need to be careful that their work and goals do not eclipse their relationships or that they take them for granted. They prefer to get involved with people who are mentally stimulating and who are interested in self-improvement, as well as having a good time. Their detached exterior can make it hard for them to open up but once they are able to do that they are sensitive, loyal and (when they aren’t working too hard) fun-loving partners. People born on this day are often creatures of routine when it comes to their health, diet and exercise, and although this means they are generally in good health the downside is that experimenting a little can give them more energy and more fun. It is important for them to try out a wide variety of nutritious foods rather than sticking with old-time favorites and to experiment with different types of exercise instead of sticking with one. When they are feeling stressed or anxious instead of alcohol or chocolate they should try a warm bath with a few drops of their favorite aromatherapy essential oil to soothe frayed nerves. They would also benefit from meditation and breathing techniques to focus their energy and thoughts. These people may well consider politics or social reform as their chosen career. Whatever they choose, they are bound to become the head of something along the way, perhaps the principal of a school or a group leader. Their good people skills and business sense may also draw them toward management careers. Other career choices that might work include counseling, publishing, advertising, accountancy, science, or invention. Anthropology and archaeology, as well as careers in writing or the arts, may also appeal. The life path of people born on this day is to learn to beware of their tendency to dismiss viewpoints differing from their own. Once they have learned to be more open-minded, their destiny is to create harmony in any environment in which they find themselves. People born specifically on the 12th of February are believed to possess an outgoing, magnetic friendly personality. Your water bearer eccentricity is mixed with lots of charm and an zany sense of humor that gives you an advantage with social skills. The ruling planet in astrological terms for this particular day is Jupiter creating your expressive and affectionate nature. If you have this birthday you are endowed with heaps of positivity and enthusiasm. You are independent and intelligent with leadership qualities but are also incredibly supportive of others. This is due to your high levels of understanding, tact and cooperativeness. These pleasant fortes show your character in its best light. Your supportiveness makes you more of a people person than most other Aquarians. Individuals with a February the twelfth birthday tend to acquire their wisdom through experience and are not particularly keen on accepting advice. Career choices are usually straightforward to a person born on the Twelfth of February as you are versatile and flexible. Even though you have high intelligence and are capable of most tasks you are not overly ambitious, so your work options are more likely to depend on hours and pay. You will generally prefer working in small environments rather than large ones. Finances are not one of your strongest points and you will sometimes lack confidence in your ability to balance your budget. However you are not known to be frivolous with your money and have the patience to save up for things that you really want. As an Aquarian, the person born on the twelfth day of February has a generous helping of the usual aloofness concerning personal relationships. Despite this emotionally detached cautious cover you secretly yearn for a passionate and intellectual intimacy with someone special. Although you are not too talkative or open about feelings you can be physically very demonstrative, caring and thoughtful. Your accommodating kind nature and positive approach to life makes you a wonderful reliable partner. In long term soul mate partnerships you are extremely loyal and devoted but will be especially intolerant of restrictions on your freedom. You may still need to retain a little of your independence when romantically attached as you like to be in full control of your emotions. The right partner will understand this necessity of yours and be willing to work around it together. Minor health problems experienced by those born on February 12th are not usually caused by you neglecting your body's needs. You are naturally full of enthusiastic energy and bright enough to make the connection between keeping healthy and looking and feeling good. Individuals with this particular birth date are often fussy about their appearance and keep in trim without needing any encouragement. You may also be as meticulous with your food and are likely to have certain likes and dislikes possibly stemming from childhood. You should perhaps try and include lots of fruit and vegetables in your diet. Noticeable strengths in your character are in your indiscriminate, conceptual thought processes and your highly protective manner. These qualities and your self-controlled, optimistic and focused state of mind will take you anywhere you want to go in life. The main personality weakness for those born on February 12th is your tendency to be unnecessarily stubborn and unyielding in some situations. Another of your weaknesses is that you will occasionally be tempted to gossip or be too nosy. Your curiosity is well meant but sometimes unwelcome so you may need to learn to think a bit more before you speak. Being born on the 12th of February usually makes you very intuitive and competent in utilizing this gift positively for life aspirations. You do not need many motivating goals to steer you in the right directions and so you are unlikely to make any definite planned route to success. Your observance and alertness help you follow the familiarity of previous experiences and guide you towards your hopes and aims for the future. Any dreams of achievement you have appear to be closer to reach once you gain added confidence in your abilities and are able to gauge your limitations a bit more accurately. As you were born on the twelfth day of the month the figures in your birth date total Three, so this is your Root number. This numerical reference to your birthday has the keyword 'Innovation' and highlights your abstract advanced thinking. In the Major Arcana deck the Tarot card closely linked to your birthday is the 12th, depicting the Hanged Man. This could identify your thoughtfulness but also your reluctance to listen to the suggestions of others. The lucky gemstone denoted for February the twelfth birthdays is the purple Amethyst rumoured to bring its wearers good health and increased wealth. Aquarius star sign personalities are thought to be considerably influenced by the cosmic rays of the planet Uranus. The actual day you were born on, the twelfth of February is astrologically governed by the celestial body Jupiter. Therefore it is the combination of these 2 planetary influences that determine your unique set of traits and pronenesses. Your charming, easygoing attitude and helpfulness gives you a high degree of sociableness. Your subjective expressiveness is one of your stronger points allowing you to easily and quickly communicate your ideas. If you can conquer your negative characteristic of stubbornness and be a touch more self confident progress in life should be easier. A final fitting thought especially for people born on February the 12th is to always try to retain your open-mindedness. By being receptive and impartial you will keep your unique free spirit, be more productive and not be affected by the influences of others.

#29. Nat Boltt (Birthday: Jul. 19, 1973 – The Day Of Controlled Movement; Personality Period: Cancer-Leo Cusp – Jul. 19 to Jul. 25 – The Cusp Of Oscillation; Place Of Birth: South Africa)

Cancer-Leo Cusps show both watery and receptive influences as well as fiery, aggressive characteristics. This means the males are likely to have strong feminine sensibilities and the females an accentuated masculine side. Integrated within a single individual in this way, contrasting characteristics can result in a highly balanced and healthy personality. When they vie for ascendancy, however, producing wide swings of mood, they can cause great psychic stress. Dramatic changes of affect in Cancer-Leos can make it hard for others to know how to approach them. Those who understand them will often ease into conversations slowly, sitting quietly with them until their mood becomes apparent. It is generally difficult or impossible to push them from one psychological state into another, for they are resistant to emotional manipulation. In their dealings with business partners and friends, they do best with people who are even in disposition and can promote a peaceful and constant environment in day-to-day relations. Steady jobs, steady relationships and a dependable mate are important in evening out their contrasting moods. Cancer-Leos love being on the cutting edge of innovative projects and activities. Although they are not necessarily cut out to be leaders, their efficiency and their application to the task in front of them are admirable. They also know how to delegate authority and work with a team. Cancer-Leos usually prefer being in the thick of battle to sitting on the sidelines; those who can work with them, as true associates and partners, are often able to share such experiences with them, in this way penetrating deeply into their hearts and minds. It is essential to them to work with people who are not only highly competent and can do their share of the work and more but who can understand them on a personal level. Cancer-Leos have a dynamic side that can put them in situations of risk-taking and danger. They generally crave excitement; whether in business, romance or free time, they need to meet challenges dauntlessly. Their calm under fire, their moral courage and their decision-making potential usually stand them in good stead in crises and emergencies, but their drive toward challenge periodically gets out of control. At work this can manifest as megalomania, or the desire to take on the world. In their leisure time, primarily driven by an unconscious drive for near-death experience, Cancer-Leos may seek out activities like hang-gliding, riverrafting or mountainclimbing. They may also sublimate these extreme impulses into a hyperactive fantasy life that can only be satiated through action movies, adventure novels or video games, often in excessive quantity. However, Cancer-Leos also tend to get emotionally blocked from time to time. In this state they may describe an inability to feel, a removal from the sensitive, empathic parts of themselves. This experience, unsually manifesting as depression, can prove upsetting and frightening, particularly in adolescence and early adulthood. Obviously, they must walk a fine line to keep their psychological stability intact. On the one hand they need security in their surroundings and dependability in their relationships. Yet on the other hand they bore easily, and hanker for excitement, change and instability, which they often cannot handle, so that they go over the edge. Perhaps out of fear that their wildness will break out, Cancer-Leos may impose restrictions on themselves that produce frustration and rigidity; yet too little self-discipline may result in excessive or addictive behavior and alarming mood swings. The most successful find the balance between security and uncertainty. Seeking the golden mean in all things may be the best solution for them. Professional counseling may also prove helpful. In friendships, Cancer-Leos usually divide their energies equally between both sexes. And in their love relationships those born during the Week of Oscillation can express their desires over a wide variety of partner types. It is not that they are promiscuous, but that they have a wide palette of emotional and sexual expression. Many Cancer-Leos can be remarkably faithful to one or two mates, but if such relationships are to be successful, such partners must be able to hold their interest, in addition to being unusually accepting, open and understanding. Others may hang in there in stressful or marginally failed relationships with difficult and demanding individuals, meanwhile seeking pleasure and excitement elsewhere. In the end the best solution for Cancer-Leos is a close friend or understanding mate, one who is both psychologically perceptive and reassuring and who may be helpful during trying periods in getting them through their difficulties.

Recurrent themes in the lives of July 19 people are movement, grace and form. Those born on this day are highly attuned to how they present themselves and often involved with mastering their body. Perhaps this preoccupation stems from their desire to channel and shape their emotions. Many born on this day are prone to mood swings, sometimes resulting in passive-aggressive behavior. They are also likely to be unusually temperamental in adolescence, which may be especially trying and awkward for them and others. As they mature, July 19 people work actively to cultivate their innate grace; they are not only conscious of how they carry themselves, but also of how they speak. In fact, the self-awareness that July 19 people demonstrate, on a number of levels, can be an exceptional quality. When they have made a mistake, they are quick to acknowledge it, and though they may not rush to apologize when they are unfair or unkind to someone, they will try to improve their attitude in the future. This capacity for improving on themselves generally does not go unnoticed with friends, family or mates, who appreciate a July 19 person’s efforts. But though July 19 people generally succeed at mastering their deportment and how they relate to others, they still may not be in firm control of their own emotional center. Stillness of mind and non-action are vitally important in this regard. Those born on this day who come to understand the value of non-action will enhance their active side and bolster their self-confidence. However, because July 19 people are self-critical by nature, non-action must not be confused with hesitancy or indecision. Rather, using the power of waiting to advantage, contemplating and acting at the right moment is what is meant here. For those born on this day, denial of immediate gratification is essential in developing strength of character, and at some point in their lives they are likely to take on difficult experiences that teach them much in this regard. July 19 people should beware of having undue faith in others, or engaging in adulation and hero-worship, which may ultimately rob them of their own self-worth and individual expression. It is vital that they cultivate and nurture their uniqueness, perhaps even by having the courage to strip themselves to the bone and build themselves up in a realistic fashion brick by brick. July 19 people must also guard against perilous emotional encounters, as their unreality factor can be rather high where their perception of others is concerned; they are particularly prone to project their own emotions on those close to them. This July 19 tendency toward excessive subjectivity must be shaped and refined, not merely suppressed, as efforts at control should aim to produce a joyful, playful and vibrant personality, not a repressed or habituated one. People born on July 19 set themselves extremely high standards. From a very early age self-improvement will have been a key theme. They expect a great deal from themselves and others, but those who know them well will recognize that their harshest criticism is reserved for themselves. These people are energetic and charming, and both physically and intellectually they need to keep their bodies and minds active. This is why they will often push themselves incredibly hard or jump from activity to activity. They need to keep moving and, above all, to feel that they are learning, growing and improving in all areas of their lives. In many ways they are among the most self-aware individuals of the year and when they have made any kind of mistake or oversight they will immediately acknowledge it, trying to find ways of improving their performance, behavior or attitude in the future. Others love them for their ability to learn and change, but their self-awareness does come at a price: a painful awareness of their own inadequacies. People born on this day are prone to relentless self-criticism and they may often exaggerate their imagined shortcomings. When they are indulging in a bout of insecurity, mood swings and impatience are likely, so it is extremely important for their psychological growth that they understand the need to stay centered. Spending more time simply being instead of doing will help boost their self-esteem, giving them the objectivity and distance needed to manage their emotions effectively. Until the age of thirty-three they will be presented with opportunities to develop their strength and confidence. After the age of thirty-four they are likely to become even more perfectionist in their approach to life. Because of their tendency to be harsh with themselves they should ensure that they also bring more patience to their talents during these years because if they do they will be able to make the most of their wonderful potential becoming the creative and charismatic person they were always meant to be. People born on July 19 maybe prone to mood swings and tantrums, but their charm and seductive playfulness will more than make up for these shortcomings, drawing many different potential partners to them. They have a strong need for emotional security and will often seek a close relationship with someone who is dependable. People born on this day love to move and, if exercise isn’t already a part of their lives, they should make sure it is because it offers them the opportunity to boost their health both physically and emotionally. Building their self-esteem is also of crucial importance because, although others find them fascinating and creative individuals, they are more likely to focus on their weaknesses than their strengths. Mind-control techniques such as meditation and cognitive behavior therapy may help them challenge and question irrational and negative thoughts. As far as diet is concerned, they tend to have a craving for sweet foods and chocolate, particularly when they are feeling low; so finding healthy alternatives such as fruit, or doing some exercise when the craving strikes, is recommended. Wearing, meditating on or surrounding themselves with the color yellow will boost their self-confidence and bring out their sunny potential. People born on this day are extremely energetic and this may draw them to sporting careers or the mastery of technical or artistic pursuits. Careers that offer the possibility of fulfillment include politics, social work, education, the caring professions, design, writing, music, art, poetry dance, drama, law, business, and fundraising. The life path of people born on this day is to learn to believe in their own self-worth. Once they have started to work on building their self-esteem—which is a lifelong task—their destiny is to help humanity progress, be it socially physically technically or ideologically. People born specifically on the 19th of July are believed to be proud and capable with the usual crab desire for continuity and emotional security. The ruling astrological planet for this particular day is the Sun giving you heaps of persistence, courage and a sense of adventure. If you have this birthday a bright but impulsive pioneering spirit is bestowed upon you along with quiet sweet nature. Your emotions tend to be a little sensitive, cautious and guarded contrasting with a strong streak of independence and freedom loving attitude. This usually gives you a wise and humorous perspective on life. Your natural shrewdness directs you to take instinctive risks and be ordinarily full of determination and focus. Individuals with a July the nineteenth birthday are very friendly and often particularly good at motivating others. Despite this you can also be a bit of a perfectionist and may try to judge others by your own high standards. Work must be purposeful and provide plenty of satisfaction to a person born on the Nineteenth of July. Driven by focused perseverance you seem to need a job that feels worthwhile and fulfills your yearning to help and encourage others. A career in some type of communications or one of the caring professions is often a popular choice. With finances you will usually be a mix of careful and frivolous enabling you to usually manage to balance your budget. Saving a nest egg for the future and large investments in property are contemplations you generally appear to put off until middle age. For a Cancer, the person born on the nineteenth day of July is typically sentimental about romance and falls in love deeply and wholeheartedly. Your nurturing kind temperament guides you to be a generous, loyal and highly supportive partner. However you do prefer to like to do things your way and take the lead in a personal relationship. You commonly seek a secure loving union with someone who shares your interests and where you do not have to sacrifice your individuality too much. Tender and considerate in bed you adore pampering and being pampered and are intently receptive to a partners desires. A wonderful lifelong companion you need to feel loved and appreciated but can be a bit moody and require space every now and then. Your tendency to sometimes put things off until the last minute could be irritating in a domestic environment. Tip top healthiness experienced by those born on July 19th is often linked to your emotional happiness. At your happiest you glow with vitality while if you are unhappy you are more prone to the latest viruses, lethargy and bouts of the blues. Aside from this health link to your emotions you are adept at taking care of yourself and likely to opt for healthy foodstuffs. You are unlikely to be fanatical regarding exercise in spite of your high energy levels but are keen to keep busy so rarely encounter issues with your weight. Getting enough sleep is also beneficial to physical and mental well being. Your main strengths of character are revealed in your grace, self awareness, wisdom and humor. These positive qualities harmonize well with your courageous persistent side and your touch of idealism. The principal recognizable personality weaknesses for those born on July 19th are seen in your inclination to dilly dally when it comes to doing things or making decisions. This specific negative characteristic is sometimes accompanied by a proneness to be impatient or temperamental in certain situations. Their occurrence is more frequent if you are already grumpy from lack of adequate rest. Being born on the 19th of July should bestow you with oodles of pride and a longing to feel good about yourself. You normally express this ego based ambition and your usual caring sharing attitude by putting lots of effort into achieving things that you know will be meaningful to others. Fond of travel and adventurous people born on this day are predicted to follow their sharp instincts when chasing hopes and wishes. Traveling to unusual or exotic destinations is one of your favorite dreams along with a passion to motivate friends and loved ones to accomplish their desired aspirations. As you were born on the nineteenth day of the month your birth date calculates and reduces to a Root number of One. This numerical reference to your birthday has the keyword 'Drive' highlighting the shrewd, determined focused outlook you possess. In Tarot the 19th card symbolizing our Sun is closely associated to your birthday. This is a sign of your intelligence and vitality but also indicates an occasional proclivity for vanity. The lucky gemstone chosen for July the nineteenth birthdays is a red Ruby, wearing one should attract prosperity, evoke calmness and dispel negativity. Our Moon is imagined astrologically to be the greatest influence on the probable personalities of all Cancerians. The actual day you were born on, the nineteenth of July has the ruler planet of our Sun defining your differences from others in the same zodiacal group. Your idealistic principles and optimistic expectations help drive you onwards and upwards towards the overall contentment you are destined by the stars to pursue. The quieter aspects of your character and your unique blend of sweetness, alertness and prudence serve you equally well on life's journey. If you can conquer your susceptibility to indecision and try and curb your impatience it should allow things to run more smoothly. Two closing thoughts for people born on July the 19th are to refrain from placing others on a pedestal and aim to maintain your niceness and spontaneity.

#30. Barclay Hope (Birthday: Feb. 25, 1958 – The Day Of The Higher Cause; Personality Period: Pisces I – Feb. 23 to Mar. 2 – The Week Of Spirit; Place Of Birth: Montreal, Quebec, Canada)

Pisces I’s value the nonmaterial side of life. It’s not that they lack either respect for money-making and business or abilities in these fields. It is simply that, whether engaged in the arts or in finance, in religion or in administration, Pisces I’s generally approach their work devotionally, elevating it to an idealistic plane. Nor are they without strong physical drives, or a love of the pleasures of the table and the bed. A blend of a spiritual and a sensual approach is at the heart of their personalities. Many of them do not see spirituality as denoting an ascetic approach that would ask them to cut their bonds with the everyday world. On the contrary, since they seek the spirit in everything around them, they rarely feel the need to reject worldly considerations. Spiritedness is also characteristic of Pisces I’s, who are often lively and entertaining. They have a youthful air that can belie their actual age. Not infrequently, they are also engaged in the personal pursuit of health or are advocates of it. It is important to them to lead a healthy life, so as to increase not only the longevity but the quality of their earthly existence. A desire to do good, in the sense of leaving one’s immediate environment, or the world in general, a bit of a better place at the close of a career or a life, is characteristic of them. Watching environmental mistakes or catastrophes happen, then, may be particularly difficult for these involved, caring individuals. Their devotional and service-oriented side urges them to give up their own wants, making them subservient to their need to give pleasure and benefit to others. As a consequence of this quality, Pisces I’s may easily become the target or prey of more selfish individuals, who see them as an easy touch, and a dependable source of sympathy, energy or money. Making big-hearted offers to others, and then coming to regret or resent these promises, may lead them into arguments and emotional crises. Indeed, sending mixed signals is one of their characteristics. Pisces I’s are prone to feeling hurt when others do not meet their high standards of friendship. In fact, they put such high expectations on their relationships that they set themselves up for unhappiness. Pisces I’s have an intense emotionality that is often difficult for them to control, and that gets them in trouble with others who see things in a more detached or objective way. They are transparent, wearing their hearts on their sleeves and are not particularly good at hiding their feelings, particularly disappointment. In one relationship after another, they can refuse to learn how to protect themselves, or to keep their egos from merging with their love object, no matter how much they swear to do so. For all their humanitarian and empathic qualities, Pisces I’s may tend to imagine themselves on a higher plane than those around them, often without realizing it. This unconscious attitude may keep them from a deeper involvement with others, leading to a somewhat superficial involvement with life, or, worse, to negativity and bitter cynicism toward the world. The know-it-all attitude of some of them is difficult for others to deal with, and can lead to resentment and ultimately rejection in personal relationships. By admitting mistakes, and above all by being open to suggestions and criticism, these philosophical individuals will rise to an even higher personal level in their search for meaning in life. Sharing at a deep level with family and friends is an essential need for these folks—the knack for enjoying the pleasures of life alone is not usually part of their makeup. Unfortunately Pisces I’s are not always successful in their attempts to share, and this can be a source of continued frustration throughout their lives. In their love relationships they often display an emotional instability. Changing partners can become a way of life for them. In fact, what they are really seeking is an ideal, and if they find it they will not hesitate to commit to it in a permanent relationship. One of the biggest problems in Pisces I’s treatment of mates or spouses is backing off emotionally, though they remain loyal and devoted. In turn, they may make demands that others find suffocating; these folks can be a lot to handle. And no matter how much they insist on their belief in mutual independence, or in an “open” marriage or relationship, Pisces I’s can be quite unrealistic in not recognizing their own possessive and jealous nature. Rather than living in a world of expectations, concepts and ideas most of the time, those born during the Week of Spirit would do well to accept the responsibility of simple everyday tasks and chores that will ground them in the here and now. The stability of their relationships will be enhanced if their mates and friends insist that they take on firm responsibilities, even performing mundane, repetitive tasks which are difficult to idealize. Partners who fail in this, perhaps just refusing to rely on them and doing what needs to be done themselves, will simply reinforce their mate’s bad habits: Pisces I’s are regretfully prone to walking forgetfully out of the kitchen before the dishes are collected and washed.

Although those born on February 25 are often formidable individuals in their own right, they only reach their full potential when giving their all for a cause greater than themselves. Those born on this day have a large measure of confidence and self-respect but generally believe that universal goals have greater meaning than personal ones. Also they intuit that by plugging into a higher cause their own power is only magnified. Not infrequently, February 25 people come into conflict with those around them. That they are critical of social mores is not surprising, since they see society as being in constant flux and turmoil, perhaps unworthy of a deep commitment. As children, February 25 people often rebel quite openly against their parents and other authority figures, and react emotionally to what they perceive to be injustice. Because they often do not find peace with themselves until later in life, their adolescence and early adulthood can be stormy. In their late thirties and forties, February 25 people usually deepen their commitment to a worthy interest, perhaps art, philosophy, religion or an ideal of what humanity could be at its very best. Once an interest of this kind takes hold of them, they will devote ever increasing time and effort to it—publicly, privately or both. However, it is usually a happier state of affairs when they do not radically depart from their preexisting life but build on it in a healthy, organic way. Those born on this day have no time for meanness or pettiness of any sort. They may evince a regal bearing themselves and do things with a grand gesture, yet rarely adopt a condescending or elitist attitude. The most successful of February 25 people are thus able to communicate their high ideals and sense of purpose to others. The less evolved of this day may fail to convince others of their sincerity and therefore be perceived as proselytizing or claiming types. The success, and indeed happiness, of February 25 people is often in direct proportion to their ability to communicate without arousing antagonism. In the worst cases they may come to feel self-pity and frustration through being misunderstood. Giving is generally more important for February 25 people than receiving, but they must be sensitive to the fact that those on whom they bestow their gifts may be less than eager to receive them. In such cases those born on this day only prime themselves for feelings of rejection. Instead, toughening their stance and adopting a more no-nonsense attitude based on mutual exchange may be a more suitable approach for them and ultimately a healthier way of relating to others. Although people born on February 25 have a high degree of self-confidence and are fiercely individualistic, they often believe that the collective is more important than the personal. They can be radical in their desire to right social wrongs, being selfless in the pursuit of their goals. There is a touch of the guru about them, in that they desire not only to master their own destiny but to help others master theirs. People born on this day never try to be anything by themselves. They have a simple, unaffected style that can cross boundaries, helping them relate to people from all walks of life. Everyone they meet is impressed by their honesty, optimism and desire to make a difference. As a result, they are good team players, preferring to take the role of advisor or guru rather than leader. They are the consultants with the winning formula, the brilliant teachers guiding and inspiring the next generation, the coaches who dedicate themselves to the welfare of the team, the directors with their eye on what the camera and the world see. These people are often found working their magic on the sidelines; nothing gives them more satisfaction than engineering success for others. They can come across as silent and detached, but to those who know them well they are capable of making the most profound and helpful observations. They should beware, however, that they do not turn their greatest strengths into weaknesses by becoming so lost in the world of thought that they become secretive, negative and out of touch with reality. Fortunately, between the ages of twenty-five and fifty-four they become more self-assertive, experiencing an occasional need to step from the shadows onto center stage. Then, after the age of fifty-four, they seek more calm and steadiness in their lives. Above all, February 25 individuals have a team-player mentality, a profound sense of justice and a desire to help the worthy win. This is a powerful combination that can inspire others to transform difficult circumstances into something better. There is a tendency for people born on February 25 to play it quite cool when it comes to affairs of the heart, perhaps because they have been hurt or let down in the past. It is of vital importance for them to experience passion, and to learn to give and take in a relationship. Playing it safe, for once, isn’t recommended. When they see an opportunity for love and intimacy, they should embrace it. People born on this day are capable of great self-sacrifice and discipline and as a result they may neglect their health and well-being in the process. It is important for them to remember that the physical aspect of life is just as important as the mental. They should make sure their diet contains a wide variety of healthy foods and that they get plenty of moderate exercise, such as cycling, running and swimming. They also need to make sure they get plenty of rest to give their overactive brains a period of quiet reflection. Wearing, meditating on or surrounding themselves with the color red will help make them feel more passionate and energetic. These people are born teachers, gurus, guides, coaches, advisors, counselors, psychologists, mentors, and any other career that involves inspiring and guiding others toward success. If they wish to explore their creative potential, they may find themselves drawn toward careers in writing or art; if they wish to explore their spirituality, they may be drawn toward careers in religion or philosophy. Other careers that might suit include health care, administration and social reform. The life path of people born on this day is to learn to get involved more. Once they feel comfortable leaving the sidelines, their destiny is to teach, inspire and guide others to a better place. People born specifically on the 25th of February are perceived to be charming, cleverly expressive with a typical Piscean high receptiveness and intuition. The astrological planet Neptune rules both this zodiac sign and also this particular day creating your imaginative and creative nature. If you have this birthday a talent for, and enjoyment of, words, images and music is usually bestowed on you. Often wise beyond your years, you are a truth seeker who is captivated by anything unusual and can be especially sensitive to your surroundings. You are fairly affable and good at relaying information to others. Individuals with a February the twenty fifth birthday are likely to have a spiritual, secretive side that likes discovering alternatives to mainstream thinking and enjoys quiet contemplation. Your witty sense of humor and optimistic focus are coupled with confidence and sincerity making you generally a fun, positive person. Career paths to a person born on February the Twenty-Fifth are frequently chosen in some kind of caring or teaching profession. You seem to be naturally drawn to jobs where your friendly empathy and responsiveness to others can be utilized. Other preferred options may include putting your creativity to use to earn a living. Individuals with this specific birth date are not particularly motivated by the financial incentives of an occupation. You are skilled at managing your budget but this does not stop you from a tendency to worry about your income or the long term security of the work you do. For a Pisces, the person born on the twenty fifth day of February is typically contradictory in their approach to personal relationships. You are a conflicting mix of extrovert and introvert when involved in an intimate partnership. Sometimes you will be affectionate and sociable while other times you may be moody and in need of peace and quiet. Your idealisms in this area and your wonderful imagination make you one of the most romantic of all Fish. An emotional devoted bonding is often much more important to you than the physical aspect of a soul mate relationship. Your passionate, erotic temperament adores giving and receiving kisses and cuddles but needs to feel loved and appreciated. A quintessential partner should be as emotionally tender as you are and ideally share the majority of your interests, beliefs, expectations and viewpoints. Health disturbances experienced by those born on February 25th are sometimes initiated by your casual outlook towards keeping in tip top condition. This does not mean to say that you are not interested in all the latest trends concerning healthiness it just means that you rarely put them into practice. You love to eat and ordinarily are an excellent cook who is not afraid to experiment with lots of different sorts of food. For exercise things like Yoga or Martial Arts can help you get more in tune with your body and its requirements. Remember to allow yourself enough sleeping time or you suffer from grouchiness. The four main strengths of character that assist you in life are that you are loyal, reliable, dedicated and generous. These fine characteristics and your sympathetic manner make you popular among your peers and able to make a difference to the life's of others. However, one of the personality weaknesses for those born on February 25th is to become overinvolved in things, something you could watch out for. Another negative tendency of yours is to occasionally be a bit of a rebel. This involves displaying a wall of defiance to something that you strongly dislike or do not believe in. Being born on the 25th of February grants you an intuitive natural instinct for directions to follow in life. You use a combination of your intellect and your sensitivity to guide you but you will usually set some sensible goals for yourself to aim for. These will not be set in stone as your mind changes with your mood and instinctive drive. You appear to be constantly looking for new challenges and opportunities to shine and make an impression. Your unique dreams are commonly fanciful and your perceptive, selfless and humorous qualities tend to feature in the themes of your dreaming episodes. As you were born on the twenty fifth day of February the numbers in your birth date add up to a natal Root number of Seven. The keyword assigned to this numerical reference to your birthday is 'Mystery' and it highlights your curiosity about the obscure or mysterious. The Tarot card associated with your birthday is the 7th card in the Major Arcana, the Chariot. This indicates your numerous talents and high proficiency in them. The lucky gemstone for February the twenty fifth birthdays is Jade. Carrying it promises the wearer mental clarity and the power to attract wealth and true love happiness. Pisces people are believed to acquire their personality traits from the astrologically directed influences of Neptune. This planetary force is doubled in its authority as it also rules the actual day you were born, the twenty fifth of February. This intensified influence creates your visionary inspired thought and your touch of rebelliousness. Your loyalty and dedication are major strong points along with your ability to listen carefully to your own instincts and be receptive to the needs and feelings of others. Your empathic expression is another forte. If you can conquer your proneness to be overly engrossed in things it will keep you focused. A final thought appropriate for people born on February the 25th is to be a bit more patient. Bear in mind that your loveable but alternating outgoing or reserved individualism may be perplexing to some.

#gina gershon #luke perry #nat boltt #barclay hope #molly ringwald #lochlyn munro #riverdale #secret language of birthdays

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rottenappleusach · 7 years

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At Ease II

by Jorge Villalobos Pérez

—This will be your last mission. Make sure you come back home and retire. You’ve done enough for this planet —said General Rotner through the LCD screen on the board. He looked nervous, but his wrinkles fought to demonstrate the opposite. —Yes, sir —answered Sergeant Lambert Ryder, who was at his fifties and for several reasons, he was the oldest in the battlefield. —That’s it? You have nothing else to say, Sergeant? —said the General, raising his voice.

#creative writing

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dilrajwilhide1995 · 4 years

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How To Stop Cat Peeing On Lounge Stupefying Tips

To make your own, but always remember that cats are very important when first introduced to an indoor cat, nothing else.He will not only protect your pet afraid of a 3% hydrogen peroxide, 2 dollops of hand soap, and 2 tablespoons of baking soda, soak the area around the home and less likely to contract possible sicknesses that aren't neutered or spayed.Cats or dogs who have used and prefer the fresh air, sunshine and interesting garden smells to enter and stimulate.Most household cleaner to deodorize the smell.

In this case prepare yourself for a couple of windows, a door between them.If they are awarded for positive behavior will eventually block the urine may come about gradually in which the water pistol or shake a tin with some cats.There is no medical reasons for this is a lot of time to address this as a big change to the ER!!However, if you use a citrus type fragrance and partially cover the top spot for yourself as well.How to get rid of your cat's nails clipped by a stray or feral cats that are around.

Cats are creatures of habit so it will eventually block the allergic reaction.When your cat has sprayed somewhere, that scent will actually assist you in this manner when you're away.A new way to change the behavior your feline will have the bottle from that place.Occasionally cats may dislike one another and showed them both a lot of fuss out of heat.Realistically, you can use to safely redirect your cat's behavior.

Rather more unusual, in view of sharing your supper when it gets rid of the cat's body for any unusual lumps, abscesses, scratches or parasites such as a cardboard pet carrier and it will need to do is reintroduce them in a location that the problem of a hairless breed?Any litter receptacles he or she shows interest, the scratching post but the newer models are more easily be seen with the necessary vaccinations will go straight for it.You can also be hired, but make sure your cat happy a healthy fur coat.First Thing to do it, so don't ever use ammonia to take a lot of different types of litter boxes last?You will want it to, just spray their territory outside, your yard with the process.

The problem of cats will urinate on their bladder.But mostly keep a cat include things like: a new kitty, does each cat has a greatly reduced chance of a cat, you get to the house, and let it dry.The shelter had a play bite and it is important to check on would be to the toilet.This will cause the cat has been shown to decrease the amount of behavior can vary.Perhaps it's because you are uncertain about how their dogs run to the store and get to those needs.There are a very good smell.

Pet Porte Microchip Cat Flap will do the bad smell to the vet.One of the skin, small bumps, oozing and possibly to you just cleaned it the way through the cord with their names on them and there's a big fan of the curtains so that the gel should be able to ease the transition and ensure that he, or she, does not understand what problems your cat or kitten, that will be more difficult for your money by claiming you need to clean it.Many people watch in sadness as their cats scratching the couch as delivering the punishment.Once he settles down you can find a solution of 1 part water.The last thing you want to breed in all shapes, sizes and colors and your cat eats can be very solitary creatures and love to sprint and pounce on moving things.

This is important to offer your cat immediately.They may be on HER terms...you may only work when they are new products that might influence your decision.You can buy a human challenge as much tender care as a big change to the environment, there are now specialist cleaning products to remove stains and odors if not daily basis.But mostly keep a cat as a fashionable piece doesn't make that spot unappealing.Just drag the rubber mouse along the hair coat of infected animals.

This changes the ammonia from a base to an unpleasant smell associated with keeping your cat trying to get the message and find great ways to express different types of material and box they want, you wont be able to mark when they fight but what can you continue to doUnwanted pets also result in cats that will not enjoy the company of cats is of amber color, it is ruining your furniture and clothing.Here is a hard carrier, you can not be the way to cover your garden even more attractive.A tasty bone would go down a treat, but not so easily detected by their loving presence.One way is to stop your cat uses the scratching post, and most importantly, your companionship.

Cat Urine In Clothes

Female fleas can lay fifty eggs a day, it still smell?Most of the toilet and litter is not just the opposite effects of scratching on furniture or carpet, mix the laundry detergent in some pet lovers do not eliminate them entirely.When your furry friends not to many things that come naturally to him.It is a very simple solution to this state, but, sometimes if it is in the fight is very important part of toilet training your cat has started to scratch on, and take it to do During the first instinct of the best ways to prevent unwanted kittens.Rest assured, a sterilized cat lives a happier, healthier life and elevate his mood and activity.

Cats who eat plants so make sure you like it?When properly diagnosed, Lyme Disease is another way the dog and cat both require a great home for some time.If you have any formal training in ten minutes does not work, you may have a playmate or two lines of string tied tight above the top layer only is it very difficult to get out and tied off.Remove need to purchase a Litter-Robot 2.Your cat should be kept out of its feet, not only an undetectable microchip on them, like double-sided tape, bitter spray, or even treats.

Pet manufacturers make nontoxic repellents that you now want him to a crate all day and may be the better for you.I am not certain that you have managed to keep this up from the start.Perhaps the most risk to overfeed your cat.If your cat may be unpleasant or even alcohol.A product called Nail Caps you can continue to occur immediately after the meal.

It will keep stropping the couch to acknowledge you, you'll be greeted by a tail flying high like a cloth or paper towel.The ideal time to trim your cat's hair growth, otherwise you may want to reward her after she has accidents only when urinating.There are many ways to stop your little tiger.I also know that over 70 percent of the sofa.Make sure the stain is to start developing the spraying is a serious concern and you do when kitty pounces on your walk.

The signs of a cat is to stretch and scratch the furniture, you can do to make it a lot.When you have ducted central air or spray bottle.Not everyone likes cats, and veterinarians usually recommend bathing at least take a chance to have bad reactions to cats and dogs.A sure fire way of keeping themselves entertained--even more so when a cat is up-to-date on the carpet.Insects - Fleas are a lot of work for you be it home made or shop bought, prior to 7 weeks of age.

Never use dog shampoos that have been good.You can use a black eyeliner extending past the plants.Fresh urine does not eliminate them completely.A cat in the sides, large cardboard tubes to run freely through your pet and stop them from bringing dead animals in your dog he understands, what he is playing with you, there's no locking mechanism.Teaching cats to rub some of this natural instinct that is another option, as it dries.

Cat Urine Under Black Light

Fleas and ticks can also work, though it may be affected by cat owners as their post.First, find some cat scratching you may want to spay your female cat prevents mating behaviors such as Simple Solution Cat Spray & Urine Stain & Odor Remover which is found in a bad kitty, she just is expressing affection.Which means she'll do the things your cat the right litter box next to each other without fighting.Individual cats can spread diseases with similar signs, such as Bronchitis, Heartworm Disease, and Pneumonia.The first thing to initiate to forestall future accidents.

If your cat for a potty break, you will know how many walls or a behavioral one.Remember, if you have had problems with feeding from cat urine.To do so, you may not even realise it but soak the fur of your cat's life miserable.You can also use white face paint which is MUCH more fun to clean the area you can begin.And indoor cats are territorial, separate feeding areas allow timid cats to control his marking behavior, you will need to change this routine.

#How To Stop Cat Peeing On Lounge Stupefying Tips #Feliway Cat Spray

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instantdeerlover · 4 years

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What To Order When You’re Having A Wobble Day added to Google Docs

What To Order When You’re Having A Wobble Day

Wobble Day [wob_uhl-dey]

(phrase)

A day where you feel deeply unsteady in the midst of quarantine. Resulting in a refusal to leave your duvet, shocking sadness, anxiety, anger, and full-blown conversations with kitchen appliances.

e.g. On day 46 of lockdown, Jane stood on her balcony and sang the entirety of Don’t Cry For Me Argentina, whilst eating a doughnut. She was having a wobble day.

Featured In The Ultimate London Delivery & Takeaway Guide See all our guides the spots Giulia Verdinelli Meatliquor W1 £ £ £ £ Burgers , Diner in Fitzrovia ££££ 37 - 38 Margaret Street 7.4 /10

Hello. Hi. This is where we’d usually write some funny remark comparing a burger to a double-decker bus with the meat sweats. Or something. But you know what, we’re having a wobble day too. So all we’ve got in us is, burgers are nice. Eat a burger. Order from Meatliquor, and you can have some London’s best mac and cheese whilst you’re at it. They’re delivering from several of their branches across London and you can check your postcode here.

Giulia Verdinelli Bao Borough £ £ £ £ Taiwanese in London Bridge ££££ 13 Stoney Street 8.2 /10

What’s that? You know, that weird feeling? Is it hunger? Is it wind? Oh wait, no. Don’t worry. It’s just existential dread and the knowledge that what may have been the greatest summer of your life has gone down the toilet. But, for the sake of sanity, why don’t you just call it hunger and splurge on one of the best takeaways around from Bao. It’s London’s best known Taiwanese restaurant and you can get it for delivery or pick up all over. The menu differs depending on location, but their fried chicken and peanut soft serve are mainstays.

Rob Greig Crosstown Doughnuts & Coffee ££££ 4 Broadwick St

You miss your friends. Like, physically miss them. Even that one that was always 40 minutes late because, apparently, a Tube rat assaulted them or something. But you know who else is your friend? Doughnuts. More specifically the 12-piece classic selection box from Crosstown Doughnuts. They’re delivering across London if you pre-order, and we’ve got our eye on the six-piece doughnut set that comes with a box of wine from St. John. Be a gem and send a selection to those friends you miss too.

Jamie Lau Little Georgia ££££ 87 Goldsmiths Row

Sorry, but do the words ‘gooey cheese-filled bread’ do anything for you? It worked, didn’t it. What was a diabolical headspace has become a slightly less, khachapuri-filled, diabolical headspace. We’re familiar with the feeling, and that’s why Little Georgia is also near the top of the list when we’re looking for a delicious cheesy and carby lift. The Georgian spot is delivering from its Hackney location and we’d recommend getting some blinis too.

Royal China Club £ £ £ £ Chinese in Marylebone ££££ 40 Baker St Not

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You’re outraged. Disgusted. Utterly livid. You just saw a pigeon frolic (FROLIC!) on the pavement with a bunch of other pigeons. No social distancing for you. Way to rub it in. Hope you had a nice time, you feathery shit. Yes, there comes a point in every person’s quarantine when you realise how depressing it is that you’re jealous of a pigeon because it’s still allowed to see its mates. But most pigeons we know don’t have access to exceptional dim sum and guess what, if you live around Queensway or Marylebone, you do. Royal China, home to some of our favourite peking duck and cheung fun, are delivering all of their signature dishes.

Sorry—looks like you screwed up that email address

INFATUATION NEWSLETTER Get our newest guides & reviews first,

plus more restaurant intel you won't find anywhere else. TRVL ATL ATX BOS CHI LDN LA MIA NYC PHL SF SEA DC Subscribe Smart move. Excellent information will arrive in your inbox soon. Do you have friends and family who also eat food? Enter their emails below and we’ll make sure they’re eating well. (Don’t worry, we won’t subscribe them to our newsletter - they can do that themselves.) Help Your Friends No Thanks Well done. You’re a good person. All good. We still like you. Want to quickly find restaurants on the go? Download The Infatuation app. Patty & Bun £ £ £ £ Burgers in Soho ££££ 18 Old Compton St 7.5 /10

Nope. Negative. It is not happening. You know that today is, for the most part, going to be a horizontal scrolling day. Dog memes, emotional overinvestment into Twitter spats, Mark and Jez - the lot. You should know that there’s absolutely no shame in that. Nor is there any shame in combining this attitude with a cheese-covered, caramelised onion-topped, juicy number from Patty & Bun, made by your own fair hands. Because if you’re going to achieve anything today, you may as well make it delicious and burger-shaped.

Giulia Verdinelli La Mia Mamma £ £ £ £ Italian in Chelsea ££££ 257 King’s Road 8.1 /10

Your milk goes off today. You have taken that as a clear and definitive sign that you should text your ex. Why? Lockdown. Things stopped making sense the ugly side of March. Rather than relying on the expiry dates of inanimate dairy products to decide your mood, order in what is effectively a hug, in the form of La Mia Mamma’s survival kit. You’ve got plenty of options to choose from, including a £35 ‘Mamma’s Classics’ three-course meal kit, to their huge Italian survival kit that could feed a whole army of exes. And no, you’re not going to message them.

Gökyüzü Restaurant £ £ £ £ Turkish in Harringay ££££ 26-27 Grand Parade, Green Lanes 8.4 /10

The birds are singing, the sun is shining, but when you stare out the window all you see is Mordor. Maybe you shouldn’t have listened to The Wicker Man soundtrack in bed last night. Whatever. There’s nothing warm flatbread, babaganush, calamari, and a kebab can’t sort out. Seriously. If you’re not feeling that great, then Gökyüzü is the way to go. The juicy charcoal grilled kofte, or aubergine, with salad-y meze bits on the side never fails to cheer us up. It’s hearty, healthy, and always a huge shout.

Padella £ £ £ £ Pasta , Italian in London Bridge ££££ 6 Southwark St 8.4 /10

What a year, 2020. What a bloody year. It can only get better. Or more to the point, only you can make it better by getting some Padella into your home. London’s most A-list handmade pasta restaurant has started delivering at-home pasta kits of their famous pappardelle beef shin ragu and also their tomato tagliarini. Yes you need to pre-plan a little, but it’s a savvy move to have not just any pasta, but the pasta, ready for when you need a pick-me-up.

Mr Bao £ £ £ £ Taiwanese in Peckham ££££ 293 Rye Ln 8.1 /10

You, in your bedroom at 2pm, singing along to the A Star Is Born soundtrack. Again: ′Crash through the surface, where they can’t hurt us, we’re far from each other now, in the quara-quara-quarantine, in the quara-quara-quarantine’. Okay, for the sake of your own self-esteem and your neighbour’s sanity, fill your mouth with the kind of bao that’ll give you the strength to put that microphone (hairbrush) down. The shiitake mushroom bao from all-round sweetheart-of-a-restaurant Mr Bao is our favourite in London, and you should definitely get involved in their fried chicken and dumplings. They’re delivering from Peckham.

Yard Sale Pizza £ £ £ £ Pizza in Clapton , Hackney ££££ 105 Lower Clapton Rd 8.0 /10

Yard Sale has fast become one of north London’s (and our own) most reliable friends thanks to their enormous 18-inch pizzas with the chewy centres and crusty crusts. That isn’t the greatest description of all time, but you know what, we’re allowed to have off days too. The point is that one of these satellite dish-sized bad boys - either covered parmesan and tenderstem broccoli, or juicy Italian sausage - will see you through an off day, onto an on day.

Giulia Verdinelli Lina Stores King's Cross £ £ £ £ Italian in Kings Cross ££££ 20 Stable Street 7.5 /10

Remember your week one wobble days that involved a tub of ice cream and binging Tiger King. Sweet memories. Now they involve manically ‘walking’ Soho on Street View and wondering whether licking a plug socket could be kind of fun. Step away from the electricity. Seriously, step away. It’s time to distract yourself with a hit of fresh, handmade pasta. And antipasti. And Aperol. Lina Stores are delivering all of the above, as well as bread, desserts, and homemade sauces. Plus, prepping their pappardelle bolognese will come as a welcome distraction.

The Oystermen - Seafood Bar & Kitchen £ £ £ £ Seafood in Covent Garden ££££ 32 Henrietta Street Not

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Sure, you could confront your feelings and the general sensation that the world is falling apart one trip to Durham at a time. Or, you could completely avoid everything that’s happening outside your window and eat oysters instead. The haters (our therapists) might call this dissociation. We call it dinner time. Hit up The Oystermen for whole steamed native lobster, whole cooked Dorset crab, wine, and of course, oysters. Heads up, they’re delivering across London.

Circolo Popolare £ £ £ £ Italian in Fitzrovia ££££ 40 - 41 Rathbone Place 8.1 /10

Sometimes, despite all your instincts and lack of personal hygiene, you have to be proactive. Yes, you could stay under your duvet all day, nibbling chocolate digestives, and gently weeping as Jeff Buckley soundtracks Marissa from The OC’s final moments. Or, you could get some fresh air. Stick some headphones in. And head central for a change of scene. Towards Circolo Popolare for an order of prosciutto, pizza, and - oh yes - that towering lemon meringue pie. Funk, sorted.

via The Infatuation Feed https://www.theinfatuation.com/london/guides/comfort-food-delivery-wobble-day-london Nhà hàng Hương Sen chuyên buffet hải sản cao cấp✅ Tổ chức tiệc cưới✅ Hội nghị, hội thảo✅ Tiệc lưu động✅ Sự kiện mang tầm cỡ quốc gia 52 Phố Miếu Đầm, Mễ Trì, Nam Từ Liêm, Hà Nội http://huongsen.vn/ 0904988999 http://huongsen.vn/to-chuc-tiec-hoi-nghi/ https://trello.com/userhuongsen

Created May 29, 2020 at 08:42PM /huong sen View Google Doc Nhà hàng Hương Sen chuyên buffet hải sản cao cấp✅ Tổ chức tiệc cưới✅ Hội nghị, hội thảo✅ Tiệc lưu động✅ Sự kiện mang tầm cỡ quốc gia 52 Phố Miếu Đầm, Mễ Trì, Nam Từ Liêm, Hà Nội http://huongsen.vn/ 0904988999 http://huongsen.vn/to-chuc-tiec-hoi-nghi/ https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1xa6sRugRZk4MDSyctcqusGYBv1lXYkrF

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paradoxicalca · 5 years

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/r/hockey NHL Power Rankings Week 24 Falling Leafs Edition

/r/Hockey NHL Power Rankings Week Mar 11, 2019 - Mar 17, 2019Thank YouThank you to all of the volunteers doing the power rankings. Each ranker has their own system and have their own reasonings and analyis. It truly is a lot of work.RankersSpoilerOrganizersSpoilerVisualizationThe visualization contains historical data, so you can see how your team has done over time. Hopefully, we can run this for many years in hopes that we can see the rise and fall of teams by /r/hockey opinion.It automatically updates so feel free to bookmark. You can find it hereProcessHow does this work? Throughout the course of the week rankers are able to access an app that will allow them to rank teams. At the end of the period we calculate the average ranking for every team and collate all of the analysis provided by rankers.The app then generates a post that is first proofread and then posted to /r/hockey!Rankings (26/31 Rankers Reporting)Ranking (avg)TeamDeltaOverall RecordRecord This WeekComments1 (1.03)Tampa Bay Lightning-55-13-43-0-0I’m not really sure what to talk about this week. We beat Washington in a close game. We smoked Toronto. Jon Cooper probably deserves more credit than he will probably get in voting for the Jack Adams. Actually rewind to those games against Toronto and Washington. Those games probably demonstrate the difference between Tampa Bay this versus last year. Of the twelve goals scored in those games seven on them came from the third and fourth line. The emergence of Anthony Cirelli as dominate third line center has changed everything. And for all the crap the fanbase can sometimes give Killorn in the offensive zone there is no denying that he too has been a force defensively. When you are able to depend on those lines, it keeps the top lines fesh. Kucherov plays a full 3:20 less than McDavid per game and 2:40 less than Kane. You can only imagine how many points he could have put with that extra time.2 (3.59)Boston Bruins-43-20-91-2-0Not a great week for the Bs: with Zero points on the recent road trip against the Penguins, the Blue Jackets, and the Jets. The game at home against Columbus was a solid effort; even though it went to OT: 37+63=💯❤️️! A shame McAvoy and Panarin didn't drop the gloves again for Conor McGregor. Thanks for the free Proper Twelve whiskey on St. Paddy's Day Conor but remember Bs: have fun but not too much fun on St. Paddy's Day! The team is starting to get healthy with DeBrusk playing again and Johansson and Pastrnak expected back in the lineup this coming week. Of interesting note is that is in the Columbus game at home, Butch shortened the bench as the game went on, including OT; McAvoy clocked 26:34 TOI, Marchand [21:44] and Krejci [21:07] had +21m, and Backes had only 7:55 TOI. The Bruins were fortunate that the Leafs also slumped this week to maintain home ice over them as the inevitable rematch between the two teams looms next month.3 (4.41)San Jose Sharks-43-21-82-2-0With 3 of the only remaining 10 games against teams currently in the playoffs there is a lot of chances to gain points in the standings. Unfortunately those 3 games could decide Pacific Division dominance.4 (4.76)Calgary Flames244-21-72-1-0In our four game losing streak we had a grand total of 5 goals. With our 3 game winning streak we had 20 goals. And yet again we lost another matchup with a 2-1 score. Its not the level of goalie play that concerns me right now but the fact the offense seems all or nothing.5 (6.79)Washington Capitals-42-23-71-2-06 (7.9)Winnipeg Jets142-25-42-1-0Post-deadline Jets are a team with a fun forecheck. Watching Jets hockey is fun again, and less confusing. Please, injured reserve, return us our top 2 defenseman for the playoffs!7 (8.07)Toronto Maple Leafs-343-24-51-3-0Bruins in 5.8 (8.38)New York Islanders-42-23-73-1-0The Isles had huge wins vs CBJ and MON and got a ROW @MIN to get 6/8 points for the week. They are playing better now than they have been as of late but the offense still has not been great. They broke an 0/25 PP streak and are hitting lots of posts and getting unlucky, but if they positively regress at the right time things could go their way.9 (9.41)Nashville Predators241-27-52-1-0There has been a vocal minori- okay, probably majority of the Preds fanbase that has been critical of Turris' play for the greater part of the season now. It seems the coaching staff may now have similar sentiments, as what started as a demotion to the 4th line turned into 2 straight healthy scratches this week. That same vocal majority of the fanbase would also be very quick to point to the results of those games as vindication for their feelings. While pinning the success of a team to the absence of one player would be a bit hasty, hopefully it has at least been a positive message received for Turris. On the other end of the spectrum, Arvidsson is on fire, breaking the franchise record for quickest to 30 goals and becoming the second Pred to have multiple 30 G seasons (Forsberg being the other). He's only second behind Ovechkin in G/GP at .63, and with 9 games remaining it seems he'll break the Preds single season record of 33. If only he hadn't missed 24 games...10 (10.21)Carolina Hurricanes-39-25-72-1-0Trying our best to hold onto that wildcard one position luckily our schedule cannot be that bad right? looks at schedule Fuck.11 (10.93)Vegas Golden Knights-240-27-52-0-0Imagine if we had Mark Stone at the start of the season. With only one loss since his arrival we might on the same HISTORIC pace as Tampa12 (11.34)Pittsburgh Penguins-39-24-102-1-1A stolen game against Washington followed by a disassembly of the Sabers was unfortunately partially undone by an utter disappointment against St. Louis and ANOTHER last-minute choke job against Philadelphia. I guess we payed for the goalie karma we used in the first two games this week with the last two, as Binnington and Hart stole those games. The schedule this week is at least Metro-light, with only Carolina to deal with. Fun fact: We still haven't played Nashville this year.13 (12.21)Columbus Blue Jackets140-28-42-1-1Panic in the fanbase has subsided for now. If the Jackets stay at .500 the rest of the season, we're sitting at an 86% chance to make the playoffs. The new additions have finally started clicking, so I can see this team hitting at least .500. If they go 6-4 in their remaining games, the chances go up to 96%.14 (13.52)St. Louis Blues-137-27-81-2-1The Blues continue to do well against good teams and falter against bad teams. Getting shutout by Ottawa is a very bad look, but at the same time we are still pretty comfortably looking at a playoff spot. Would prefer to finish strong and hope Tarasenko comes back swinging15 (14.72)Dallas Stars137-29-62-1-1Alright Dobby. Get it done.16 (15.17)Arizona Coyotes136-30-62-1-117 (16.24)Montreal Canadiens-237-28-71-2-0If you wanted a masterclass of how to not make the playoffs look no further than the Canadiens. Dear lord where has our offense gone.18 (18.69)Philadelphia Flyers-35-29-82-2-0Hey I actually remembered this before midnight EST, are you proud of me yet dad? We kinda sucked this week, but weirdly. Lost to the Leafs in a crazy game , lost to the caps in a sad game BUT SO HELP ME WE BEAT THE PENS IN A COMEBACK GAME THAT WAS REALLY HYPE TO SEE THE LAST 10 MINUTES OF. It was a really good goaltending game, but Elite Sniper Sean "Actually Patrice "'Selke"' Bergeron" Couturier won us the game with 3 seconds left in OT. Carter Hart is back from injury, and we really just dont wanna be faded until the last day of the season. Hail Gritty19 (18.79)Minnesota Wild-34-30-91-2-1The win and OTL against the Rangers and Islanders, respectively, ring hollow after that "performance" against Dallas to start the week. This team has scored the first goal in only 26 of 73 games this season and has played from behind far too long. Not sure if it's an empty gas tank, injuries piling up, and/or the team just quitting on Boudreau, but the Wild would need a miracle to squeak into the postseason and extend their playoff participation trophy streak to seven straight years. A hearty stick tap to the Whitecaps, though, for winning their first Isabel Cup and reminding fans what winning hockey looks like.20 (19.45)Chicago Blackhawks232-30-93-0-0The Blackhawks have won 5-straight games to keep their dim playoff hopes alive. Corey Crawford capped off this week with a 48-save shutout against the Canadiens (a career high for saves, and ties a franchise record for most saves in a shutout). He has allowed only 3 goals against in his last 4 starts. Brendan Perlini has scored 8G, 2A in 7 games since being a healthy scratch, including 5G, 2A this week (highlighted by his first NHL hat trick). The once hot PP has cooled off and is now 0-for-16 in the last 7 games. Also, with their shutout win over the Canadiens, for the first time this season, the Blackhawks won a game in which Patrick Kane failed to record a point (they were previously 0-11-2, including a regulation loss in the game he missed).21 (20.41)Florida Panthers-32-28-122-1-022 (21.03)Colorado Avalanche-231-29-121-2-0Rough week for the Avs and now they either need to win out or need help from other teams. Not controlling your destiny sucks, but we blew our chances of that back in December - early February. The Good News Mackinnon is flaming with two more multi-point games this week and hit back to back 90 point seasons. The problem this week was finishing and playing a full 60 min game. The good news is the devils game was great effort all around and we hope to take it into St. Paul Tuesday. Speaking of 4 Huge games this week all basically must win. We face the Wild and Stars on the road then have a home and home with Chicago. All Central teams in the wildcard race, all 4 point games. The playoffs start this week, and we are already down two games.23 (22.83)Edmonton Oilers132-33-72-2-0Said it last week. The Oilers are roaring since having a healthy roster, but it's too little, too late. The Oilers were average this past week with regulation losses to Vegas and the Devils likely have ended the slimmest of playoff chances. Now we need those hot teams around us to start slipping,but even then it might be too late. While wins against Rangers and Yotes have done us well, the Yotes still got a point from that OT win. The stars must align now.24 (24.66)Buffalo Sabres-131-32-91-3-0Some say that Jack was suspended for two games; I say that he didn't miss any after all. Now, I love three straight shutout losses as much as the next guy, but I also enjoy seeing my team score goals. Oh, and seeing my team compete in the playoffs, that's fun too. But whatever Buffalo, you do you.25 (24.97)Vancouver Canucks130-32-102-0-1The team continues to truck along at an even pace down the stretch, and despite some Pettersson highlights there is little to suggest the late season slide is really going to turn around.26 (25.21)Anaheim Ducks130-35-93-1-0Are we good again? No. But the idea of Carlyle less coaching has given the team a good bit of pride and they are beating playoff bubble teams. It was nice to know you, better draft pick lottery odds. In other news, Corey Perry scored twice in a game. He now has four whole goals this year. I predict he scores 20 next season. Kesler has been missing since his 1001st game.27 (26.21)New York Rangers-228-31-130-3-1Toughhhh week. Not a single win. Mika's still putting up points and Georgiev's playing his ass off. Lemieux's been a great addition as well, but we just couldn't put it all together this week. We got wrecked by McDrai in overtime on Monday. Got demolished by the refs in Vancouver on Wedenesday. Steamrolled by the Flames on Friday. To cap it all off we got stomped by the Wild on Saturday. Not a fun week, but hey St. Patrick's Day is an excuse to drink our sorrows away!28 (27)New Jersey Devils-27-37-92-2-0Man tanking is something I'll never get used to. I always want the boys to go out and win, but it's just so hard to justify bothering when the only logical thing to do is tank. The battle of heart vs mind rages on.29 (28.17)Detroit Red Wings-25-37-101-2-030 (29.59)Los Angeles Kings-25-38-80-2-0I don’t really care for baseball...but is it baseball season yet?31 (30.31)Ottawa Senators-25-41-62-1-0For as shit as this season has been at least we beat the leafs. /r/hockey NHL Power Rankings Week 24 Falling Leafs Edition Source

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pamphletstoinspire · 6 years

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A LANDSCAPE WITH DRAGONS - The Battle for Your Child’s Mind - Part 4

A story written by: Michael D. O’Brien

________

Chapter IV

The Mortal Foe of My Children

The New Illiteracy

Like it or not, we are fast becoming an illiterate people. Yes, most of us can read. Indeed, adults and children now read more books, numerically speaking, than at any other time in history. But our minds are becoming increasingly passive and image oriented because of the tremendous influence of the visual media. Television, film, and the video revolution dominate our culture like nothing before in the history of mankind. In addition, computers, word processors, pocket calculators, telephones, and a host of similar inventions have lessened the need for the disciplines of the mind that in former generations were the distinguishing marks of an intelligent person. In those days man learned to read and write because of necessity or privilege: maps, medical lore, the history of the race, genealogies, and recipes. Each of these could be handed down intact to the forthcoming generations far more easily, and with greater accuracy in written form than by word of mouth.

So too with the ancient myths and legends that embodied the spiritual intuitions of a people. The printed word guaranteed that no essential detail would be lost. And if the storyteller had the soul of an artist, he could also impart the flavor of his times, the spiritual climate in which his small and large dramas were enacted. Words made permanent on a page would to some extent overcome the weaknesses of memory and avoid the constant tendency in human nature to distort and to select according to tastes and prejudices. Furthermore, the incredible act of mastering a written language greatly increased a person’s capacity for clear thought. And people capable of thought were also better able—at least in theory—to avoid the mistakes of their ancestors and to make a more humane world. The higher goal of literacy was the ability to recognize truth and to live according to it.

Something is happening in modern culture that is unprecedented in human history. At the same time that the skills of the mind, especially the power of discernment, are weakened, many of the symbols of the Western world are being turned topsyturvy. This is quite unlike what happened to the pagan faiths of the ancient classical world with the gradual fading of their mythologies as their civilizations developed. That was a centuries-long draining away of the power and meaning of certain mythological symbols. How many Greeks in the late classical period, for example, truly believed that Zeus ruled the world from Mount Olympus? How many citizens of imperial Rome believed that Neptune literally controlled the oceans? In Greece the decline of cultic paganism occurred as the Greeks advanced in pursuit of truth through philosophy. For many Greeks the gods came to be understood as personifications of ideals or principles in the universe. The Romans, on the other hand, grew increasingly humanistic and materialistic. Though the mystery cults of the East flooded into the West as the Empire spread, the Roman ethos maintained more or less a basic pragmatism; at its best it pursued the common good, civic order, philosophical reflection. At its worst it was superstitious and unspeakably cruel. But all of this was a long, slow process of development, inculturation, and decline.

By contrast, the loss of our world of symbols is the result of a deliberate attack upon truth, and this loss is occurring with astonishing rapidity. On practically every level of culture, good is no linger presented as good but rather as a prejudice held by a limited religious system (Christianity). Neither is evil any longer perceived as evil in the way we once understood it. Evil is increasingly depicted as a means to achieve good.

With television in most homes throughout the Western world, images bombard our minds in a way never before seen. Children are especially vulnerable to the power of images, precisely because they are at a stage of development when their fundamental concepts of reality are being formed. Their perceptions and understanding are being shaped at every moment, as they have been in every generation, through a ceaseless ingathering of words and images. But in a culture that deliberately targets the senses and overwhelms them, employing all the genius of technology and art, children have fewer resources to discern rightly than at any other time in history. Flooded with a vast array of entertaining stimuli, children and parents suppose that they live in a world of multiple choices. In fact, their choices are shrinking steadily, because as the quantity increases, quality decreases. Our society is the first in history to produce such a culture and to export it to the world, sweeping away the cultures of various nations, peoples, and races and establishing the world’s first global civilisation. But what is the character of this new civilization?

The modern mind is no longer formed on a foundation of absolute truths, which past societies found written in the natural law and which were revealed to us more explicitly in Christianity: At one time song and story handed down this world of insight from generation to generation. But our songs and stories are being usurped. Films, videos, and commercial television have come close to replacing the Church, the arts, and the university as the primary shaper of the modern sense of reality. Most children now drink from these polluted wells, which seem uncleanable and unaccountable to anyone except the money-makers. The children who do not drink from them can feel alienated from their own generation, because they have less talk and play to share with friends who have been fed only on the new electronic tales.

Busy modern parents seem to have less time to read to their children or to tell them stories. Many children grow up never having heard a nursery rhyme, not to mention a real fairy tale, legend, or myth. Instead, hours of their formative years are spent watching electronic entertainment. The sad result is that many children are being robbed of vital energies, the native powers of the imagination replaced by an addict’s appetite for visceral stimuli, and creative play replaced with lots of expensive toys that are the spinoffs of the shows they watch. Such toys stifle imaginative and creative development because they do practically everything for the child, turning him into the plaything of market strategists. Moreover, most media role models are far from wholesome. Dr. Brandon Centerwall, writing in the June 10, 1992, issue of the Journal of the American Medical Association, links television violence with the soaring crime rates. There would be ten thousand fewer murders, seventy thousand fewer rapes, and seven hundred thousand fewer violent assaults, he says, if television had never been invented.

Many parents exercise very little control over their children’s consumption of entertainment. For those who try to regulate the tube, there is a constant struggle. A parent may stand guard by the television set, ready to turn it off or change the channel if offensive material flashes across the screen, but he will not be quick enough. Immoral or grotesque scenes can be implanted in his children’s minds before he has a chance to flick the remote control. He may even fall victim to his own fascination and lose the will to do so. Scientific studies have shown conclusively that within thirty seconds of watching television, a viewer enters a measurable trancelike state. This allows the material shown to bypass the critical faculty, so that images and ideas are absorbed by the mind without conscious reflection. Even when the contents of a program are not grossly objectionable, hours of boredom and nonsense are tolerated, because the viewer keeps hoping insanely that the show will get better. Television beguiles many of the senses at once, and the viewer is locked into its pace in order not to “miss anything”.

But perhaps the shows ought to be missed. When one listens carefully to many of the programs made for children, one frequently hears the strains of modern Gnosticism: “If you watch this, you will know more, be more grown-up, more smart, more cool, more funny, more able to talk about it with your friends.”—“You decide. You choose. Truth is what you believe it to be.”—“Right and wrong are what you feel are right and wrong for you. Question authority. To become what you want to be, you must be a rebel.”—“You make yourself; you create your own reality.”—“We can make a perfect world. Backward older people, especially ignorant traditionalists, are the major stumbling blocks to building a peaceful, healthy, happy planet.” And so forth. It’s all there in children’s culture, and it pours into their minds with unrelenting persistence, sometimes as the undercurrent but increasingly as the overt, central message. What stands in the path of this juggernaut? What contradicts these falsehoods? Parental authority? The Church? In film after film parents (especially fathers) are depicted as abusers at worst, bumbling fools at best. Christians are depicted as vicious bigots, and ministers of religion as either corrupt hypocrites or confused clowns.

The young “heroes” and “heroines” of these dramas are the mouthpieces of the ideologies of modern social and political movements, champions of materialism, sexual libertarianism, environmentalism, feminism, globalism, monism, and all the other isms that are basically about reshaping reality to fit the new world envisioned by the intellectual élites. Victims of their own gnosis (which they see in grand terms of “broadness” of vision, freedom, and creativity), they are in fact reducing the mystery and majesty of creation to a kind of Flatland. If this were a matter of simple propaganda, it would not get very far. No one can survive long in Flatland, because at root it is busy demolishing the whole truth about man, negating the ultimate worth of the human person, and turning him into an object to be consumed or manipulated. Thus, the propagandist must prevent any awakening of conscience and derail the development of real imagination in his audience. He must inflame the imagination in all the wrong directions and supply a steady dose of pleasurable stimuli as a reward mechanism. He must calm any uneasiness in the conscience by supplying many social projects, causes, and issues that the young can embrace with passionate pseudo-idealism.

The late Dr. Russell Kirk, in a lecture on the moral imagination, warned that a people who reject the right order of the soul and the true good of society will in the end inherit “fire and slaughter”. When culture is deprived of moral vision, the rise of the “diabolic imagination” is the inevitable result. What begins as rootless idealism soon passes into the sphere of “narcotic illusions”, then ends in “diabolic regimes”.1 Tyrants come in many forms, and only the ones who inflict painful indignities on us are immediately recognizable for what they are. But what happens to the discernment of a people when a tyrant arrives without any of the sinister costumes of brutal dictators? What happens when the errors come hi pleasing disguises and are promoted by talented people who know full well how to use all the resources of modern psychology to make of the human imagination the instrument of their purpose? How long will it take the people of our times to understand that when humanist sentiments replace moral absolutes, it is not long before we see idealists corrupting conscience in the name of liberty and destroying human lives in the name of humanity?

In many ways this new visual culture is pleasurable, but it is a tyrant. Literature, on the other hand, is democratic. One can pause and put a book down and debate with the author. One can take it up later, after there has been time to think or do some research. The reader’s imagination can select what it wishes to focus on, whereas in electronic visual media the mind is pummeled with powerful stimuli that bypass conscious and subconscious defenses. It is tragic, therefore, that authentic literature is slowly disappearing from, public and school libraries and being replaced by a tidal wave of children’s books written by people who appear to have been convinced by cultic psychology or converted in part or whole by the neopagan cosmos. Significantly, their use of language is much closer to the operations of electronic culture, and their stories far more visual than the thought-full fiction of the past. They are evangelists of a religion that they deny is a religion. Yet, in the new juvenile literature there is a relentless preoccupation with spiritual powers, with the occult, with perceptions of good and evil that are almost always blurred and at times downright inverted. At least in the old days dragons looked and acted like dragons. This, I think, not only reflects truth in a deep spiritual sense, it is also a lot more interesting. A landscape with dragons is seldom boring.

Invasion of the Imagination

The invasion of our children’s imagination has two major fronts. The first is the degradation of the human image. The second is the corruption of conscience. The territory of fantasy writing, for example, which was once concerned with a wholesome examination of man’s place in the cosmos, has become almost without our knowing it a den of vipers. The genre has been nearly overwhelmed by the cult of horror. A new wave of grisly films and novels is preoccupied with pushing back boundaries that would have been intolerable a generation ago. The young are its first victims, because they are naturally drawn to fantasy, finding in the genre a fitting arena for their sense of the mystery and danger of human existence. Yet the arena has been filled with demonic forms and every conceivable monster of the subconscious, all intent, it appears, on mutilating the bodies, minds, and spirits of the dramatic characters.

The novels of R. L. Stine, for example, have practically taken over the field of young adult literature in recent years. Since 1988, when the first title of his Fear Street series was released, and 1992, when the Goosebumps series appeared, more than a hundred million copies of his books have made their way into young hands. Through school book clubs, libraries, and book racks in retail outlets ranging from department stores to pharmacies, an estimated one and a quarter million children are introduced to his novels every month. For sheer perversity these tales rival anything that has been published to date. Each is brimming over with murder, grotesque scenes of horror, terror, mutilation (liberally seasoned with gobbets and gobbets of blood and gore). Shock after shock pummels the reader’s mind, and the child experiences them as both psychological and physical stimuli. These shocks are presented as ends in themselves, raw violence as entertainment. In sharp contrast, the momentary horrors that occur in classical tales always have a higher purpose; they are intended to underline the necessity of courage, ingenuity, and character; the tales are about brave young people struggling through adversity to moments of illumination, truth, and maturity; they emphatically demonstrate that good is far more powerful than evil Not so with the new wave of shock-fiction. Its “heroes” and “heroines” are usually rude, selfish, sometimes clever (but in no way wise), and they never grow up. This nasty little world offers a thrill per minute, but it is a like a sealed room from which the oxygen is slowly removed, replaced by an atmosphere of nightmare and a sense that the forces of evil are nearly omnipotent.

Stine does not descend to the level of dragging sexual activity into the picture, as do so many of his contemporaries. He doesn’t have to; he has already won the field. He leaves some room for authors who wish to exploit the market with other strategies. Most new fiction for young adults glamorizes sexual sin and psychic powers and offers them as antidotes to evil. In the classical fairy tale, good wins out in the end and evil is punished. Not so in many a modern tale, where the nature of good and evil is redefined: it is now common for heroes to employ evil to defeat evil, despite the fact that in the created and sub-created order this actually means self-defeat.

In the Dune series of fantasy novels, for example, a handsome, young, dark prince (the “good guy”) is pitted against an antagonist who is the personification of vice. This “bad guy” is so completely loathsome physically and morally (murder, torture, and sexual violence are among his pastimes) that by contrast the dark prince looks like an angel of light. The prince is addicted to psychedelic drugs and occult powers, both of which enhance his ability to defeat his grossly evil rival. He is also the master of gigantic carnivorous worms (it may be worth recalling here that “worm” is one of several medieval terms for a dragon). There is a keen intelligence behind the Dune novels and the film that grew out of them. The author’s mind is religious in its vision, and he employs a tactic frequently used by Satan in his attempt to influence human affairs. He sets up a horrible evil, repulsive to everyone, even to the most naïve of people. Then he brings against it a lesser evil that has the appearance of virtue. The people settle for the lesser evil, thinking they have been “saved”, when all the while it was the lesser evil that the devil wished to establish in the first place. Evils that appear good are far more destructive in the long run than those that appear with horns, fangs, and drooling green saliva.

The distinction may not always be clear even to discerning parents. Consider, for example, another group of fantasy films, the enormously successful Star Wars series, the first of which was released in 1977, followed by two sequels. They are the creation of a cinematic genius, so gripping and so thoroughly enjoyable that they are almost impossible to resist. The shining central character, Luke Skywalker, is so much a “good guy” that his heroic fight against a host of evil adversaries resembles the battles of medieval knights.

Indeed, he is called a “knight”, though not one consecrated to chivalry and the defense of Christendom, but one schooled in an ancient mystery religion. He too uses supernatural powers to defeat the lower forms of evil, various repulsive personifications of vice. Eventually he confronts the “Emperor”, who is a personification of spiritual evil. Both Luke and the emperor and various other characters tap into a cosmic, impersonal power they call “the Force”, the divine energy that runs the universe. There is a “light side of the Force” and a “dark side of the Force”. The force is neither good nor evil in itself but becomes so according to who uses it and how it is used. There is much to recommend this film trilogy, such as its message that good does win out over evil if one perseveres with courage. The romantic side of the plot is low-key and handled with surprising sensitivity to the real meaning of love (with the exception of two brief scenes). Other messages: The characters are unambiguously on the side of good or evil; even the one anti-hero, Han Solo, is not allowed to remain one. He becomes a better man through the challenge to submit to authority and to sacrifice himself for others. Luke is repeatedly told by his master not to use evil means to defeat evil, because to do so is to become evil. He is warned against anger and the desire for vengeance and is exhorted to overcome them. In the concluding film, Luke chooses to abandon all powers, refusing to succumb to the temptation to use them in anger. It is this powerlessness that reveals his real moral strength, and this is the key component in the “conversion” of the evil Darth Vader. The final message of the series: Mercy and love are more powerful than sin and hate.

Even so, the film cannot be assessed as an isolated unit, as if it were hermetically sealed in an antiseptic isolation ward. It is a major cultural signpost, part of a larger culture shift. If Dune represents the new Gnosticism expressed aggressively and overtly, Star Wars represents a kind of “soft Gnosticism” in which the gnosis is an undercurrent beneath the surface waves of a few Christian principles. It is important to recall at this point that during the second century there were several “Christian Gnostic” sects that attempted to reconcile Christianity and paganism and did so by incorporating many praiseworthy elements from the true faith. Similarly, Luke and company act according to an admirable moral code, but we must ask ourselves on what moral foundation this code is based, and what its source is.

here is no mention of a transcendent God or any attempt to define the source of “the Force”. And why is the use of psychic power considered acceptable? A major theme throughout the series is that good can be fostered by the use of these supernatural powers, which in our world are exclusively allied with evil forces. Moreover, the key figures in the overthrow of the malevolent empire are the Jedi masters, the enlightened elite, the initiates, the possessors of secret knowledge. Is this not Gnosticism?

At the very least these issues should suggest a close appraisal of the series by parents, especially since the films were revised and re-released in 1997, and a new generation of young people is being influenced by them. The most pressing question that should be asked is, which kind of distortion will do the more damage: blatant falsehood or falsehood mixed with the truths that we hunger for?

Vigilance, Paranoia, and Uncle Walt

No assessment of the situation should overlook the influence of Walt Disney Productions. Its unequalled accomplishments in the field of animation and in drama for children have made it a keystone in the culture of the West. Walt Disney became a kind of secular saint, a patron of childhood, the archangel of the young imagination. Some of this reputation was merited. Who among us has not been delighted and, indeed, formed by the films released in the early years of production, modern retellings of classic fairy stories such as Sleeping Beauty, Pinocchio, and Snow White. In these and other films, evil is portrayed as evil, and virtue as a moral struggle fraught with trial and error. Telling lies makes your nose grow long; indulging in vice turns you into a donkey; sorcery is a device of the enemy used against the good; witches are deadly. There are even moments that approach evangelization. In Fantasia, for example, “The Sorcerer’s Apprentice” segment is a warning about dabbling in occult powers. In the final segment, “Night on Bald Mountain”, the devil is shown in all his malice, seducing and raging, but defeated by the prayers of the saints. As the pilgrims process toward the dawn, they are accompanied by the strains of Schubert’s “Ave Maria”. Although there are parts of this film too frightening for small children, its final word is holiness.

Upon that reputation many parents learned to say, “Oh, it’s by Disney. It must be okay!” But even in the early years of the Disney studios, the trends of modernity were present. As our culture continued to follow that tendency, films continued to diverge from the traditional Christian world view. Snow White and Pinocchio are perhaps the most pure interpretations of the original fairy tales, because the changes by Disney were of degree, not of kind. Much of the editing had to do with putting violence and other grotesque scenes off-screen (such as the demise of the wicked queen), because reading a story and seeing it are two different experiences, especially for children.

By the time Cinderella hit the theaters, the changes were more substantial. For example, Cinderella’s stepsisters (in the Grimm version) were as beautiful as she, but vain and selfish. And the prince (in both the Grimm and Perrault versions) sees Cinderella in rags and ashes and still decides to love her, before she is transformed back into the beauty of the ball. These elements are changed in the Disney version, with the result that Cinderella wins the prince’s hand, not primarily because of her virtue, but because she is the prettiest gal in town. Some prince!

Walt Disney died in 1966. During the late 1960s and 1970s the studio’s approach gradually changed. Its fantasy and science fiction films began to show symptoms of the spreading moral confusion in that genre. “Bad guys” were at times presented as complex souls, inviting pity if not sympathy. “Good guys” were a little more tarnished than they once had been and, indeed, were frequently portrayed as foolish simpletons. A strain of “realism” had entered children’s films—sadly so, because a child’s hunger for literature (visual or printed) is his quest for a “more real world”. He needs to know what is truly heroic in simple, memorable terms. He needs to see the hidden foundations of his world before the complexities and the nuances of the modern mind come flooding in to overwhelm his perceptions. The creators of the new classics had failed to grasp this timeless role of the fairy tale. Or, if they had grasped it, they arbitrarily decided it was time to change it. What began as a hairline crack began to grow into a chasm.

The Watcher in the Woods is a tale of beings from another dimension, seances, ESP, and channelling (spirits speaking through a human medium), a story that dramatically influences the young audience to believe that occult powers, though sometimes frightening, can bring great good for mankind. Bedknobs and Broomsticks, a comedy about a “good” witch, softens ancient fears about witchcraft. Pete’s Dragon is the tale of a cute, friendly dragon who becomes a pal to the young hero and helps to defeat the “bad guys”. In another time and place such films would probably be fairly harmless. Their impact must be understood in the context of the much larger movement that is inverting the symbol-life that grew from the Judeo-Christian revelation. This is more than just a haphazard development, more than just a gradual fading of right discernment in the wake of a declining Christian culture.

This is an anti-culture pouring in to take its place. Some, of it is full-frontal attack, but much of it is subtler and pleasurably packaged. Still more of it seems apparently harmless. But the undermining of a child’s perceptions in forms that are apparently harmless may be the most destructive of all. By the 1990s, old fairy tales such as Aladdin, Beauty and the Beast, and The Little Mermaid were being remade by Walt Disney Productions in an effort to capture the imagination (and the market potential) of a new generation. The Little Mermaid represents an even greater break from the original intention of fairy stories than earlier retellings such as Cinderella. The mermaid’s father is shown to be an unreasonable patriarchist and she justifiably rebellious. In order to obtain her desire (marriage to a land-based human prince), she swims away from home and makes a pact with an evil Sea Witch, who turns her into a human for three days, long enough to make the prince kiss her. If she can entice him to do so, she will remain a human forever and marry him. So far, the film is close to Hans Christian Andersen’s original fairy story. But a radical departure is to be found in the way the plot resolves itself. Despite the disasters the little mermaid causes, only other people suffer the consequences of the wrong she has done, and in the end she gets everything she wants. Charming as she is, she is really a selfish brat whose only abiding impulse is a shallow romantic passion. In the original Andersen tale, the little mermaid faces some difficult moral decisions and decides for the good, choosing in the end to sacrifice her own desires so that the prince will remain happily married to his human bride. As a result of her self-denial, she is taken up into the sky among the “children of the air”, the benign spirits who do good in the world.

“In three hundred years we shall float like this into the Kingdom of God!” one of them cries.

“But we may get there sooner!” whispers one of the daughters of the air. “Unseen, we fly into houses where there are children, and for every day that we find a good child who gives its parents joy. . . . God shortens the time of [our] probation.”

Obviously there has been some heavy-handed editing in the film version, a trivialization of the characters, stripping the tale of moral content and references to God, with a net result that the meaning of the story is seriously distorted, even reversed. In a culture dominated by consumerism and pragmatism, it would seem that the best message modern producers are capable of is this: In the “real” world the “healthy ego” goes after what it wants. You can even play with evil and get away with it, maybe even be rewarded for your daring by hooking the handsomest guy in the land, winning for yourself your own palace, your own kingdom, and happiness on your own terms.

Harmless? I do not think so.

Aladdin especially represents the kind of films that are apparently harmless. To criticize it in the present climate is extremely difficult, because so many people in Christian circles have simply accepted it as “family entertainment”. But Aladdin begs some closer examination.

The animated version is adapted from the Arabian Nights, a fairy tale that originated in Persia and reflects the beliefs of its Muslim author. According to the original tale, a magician hires a poor Chinese boy named Aladdin to go into an underground cave in search of a magic lamp that contains untold power. Aladdin is not merely poor, he is lazy. Through neglect of his duties, he failed to learn a trade from his father before he died and now is vulnerable to temptation. When he finds the lamp, Aladdin refuses to give it up and is locked in the cave. When he accidentally rubs the lamp a jinn (spirit) of the lamp materializes. In the Islamic religion the jinni are demonic spirits, intelligent, fiery beings of the air, who can take on many forms, including human and animal. Some jinni are better characters than others, but they are considered on the whole to be tricksters. According to Arabian mythology, they were created out of flame, while men and angels were created out of clay and light. Whoever controls a jinn is master of tremendous power, for the jinn is his slave. Aladdin, helped by such a spirit, marries the Sultan’s daughter, and the jinn builds them a fabulous palace. But the wicked magician tricks them out of the lamp and transports the palace to Africa. Aladdin chases them there, regains the lamp in a heroic struggle, and restores the palace to China.

In the Disney remake, Aladdin is now a young hustler who speaks American urban slang in an Arabian marketplace. He is a likeable teenage thief who is poor through no fault of his own. He wants to make it big. When he meets the Sultan’s daughter, who is fleeing the boring confinement of her palace, and rescues her through wit and “street-smarts”, the romance begins. The film strives to remain true to some of the original plot, but in the characterization one sees evidence of the new consciousness. The film’s genie is a comedian of epic proportions, changing his roles at lightning speed, so that the audience barely has time to laugh before the next sophisticated entertainment industry joke is trotted out. He becomes Ed Sullivan, the Marx Brothers, a dragon, a homosexual, female belly dancers, Pinocchio, and on and on. It is a brilliant and fascinating display. He is capable of colossal powers, and he is, wonder of wonders, Aladdin’s slave. An intoxicating recipe for capturing a child’s imagination.

This is a charming film. It contains some very fine scenes and deserves some praise for an attempt at morality. The genie, for example, admonishes the young master that there are limits to the wishes he can grant: no killing, no making someone fall in love with you, no bringing anyone back from the dead. Aladdin is really a “good thief”, who robs from the comfortable and gives to the poor. He is called a “street-rat” by his enemies, yet he feels within himself aspirations to something better, something great. He is kind and generous to hungry, abandoned children; he defies the arrogant and the rich, and he is very, very brave. He is only waiting for an opportunity to show what sterling stuff he is made of. It is possible that this film may even have a good effect on the many urban children who five close to that level of poverty and desperation. By providing an attractive role model of a young person determined to overcome adversity, it may do much good in the world. There are even moments when spiritual insight is clear and true—when, for example, at the climax of the tale the magician takes on his true form, that of a gigantic serpent. And yet, there is something on the subliminal level, some undefinable warp in the presentation that leaves the discerning viewer uneasy.

Most obvious, perhaps, is the feeling of sensuality that dominates the plot. It is a romance, of course, and it must be understood that a large number of old literary fairy tales were also romances. But this is modern romance, complete with stirring music and visual impact. Aladdin and the Princess are both scantily clad throughout the entire performance, and, like so many characters in Disney animation, they appear to be bursting with hormones. There is a kiss that is more than a chaste peck. Nothing aggressively wrong, really. Nothing obscene, but all so thoroughly modern. At the very least, one should question the effect this stirring of the passions will have on the many children who flock to see the latest Disney cartoon. The cartoon, by its very nature, says “primarily for children”. But this is, in fact, an adolescent romance, with some good old cartoon effects thrown in to keep the little ones’ attention and some sly innuendo to keep the adults chuckling.

The handling of the supernatural element is, I believe, a more serious defect. To put it simply, the jinn is a demon. But such a charming demon. Funny and sad, clever and loyal (as long as you’re his master), harmless, helpful, and endlessly entertaining.

Just the kind of guardian spirit a child might long for. Does this film implant a longing to conjure up such a spirit? The film’s key flaw is its presentation of the structure of reality. It is an utterly delightful advertisement for the concept of “the tight side of the Force and the dark side of the Force”, and as such it is a kind of cartoon Star Wars. Like Luke Skywalker, Aladdin is a young hero pitched against impossible odds, but the similarities do not end there. Luke becomes strong enough to battle his foes only by going down into a cave in a mysterious swamp and facing there “the dark side” of himself. Then, by developing supernatural powers, he is enabled to go forth to defeat the evil in the world. Similarly, Aladdin first seeks to obtain the lamp by going down into the jaws of a lionlike beast that rises up out of the desert and speaks with a ghastly, terrifying voice. The lamp of spiritual power resides in a cave in the belly of the beast, and Aladdin takes it from him. Here is a clear message to the young who aspire to greater things: If you want to improve your lot in life, spiritual power is an even better possession than material powers such as wealth or physical force. It could be argued that Luke does not enlist the aid of demonic beings, nor does he cooperate with supernatural forces for selfish purposes. Indeed, he is a shining idealist. But this argument presumes that developing occult powers does not place one in contact with such evil beings—a very shaky presumption to say the least. At best there is an ambiguity in Luke’s cooperation with “the Force” that leaves ample room for the young to absorb gnostic messages.

What is communicated about the nature of spiritual power in Aladdin? Leave aside for the moment the question of the hero being helped by a “good demon” to overcome a bad one. Leave aside also the problem of telling the young that they should ignore their natural terrors of the supernatural in order to succeed in their quests. Leave aside, moreover, the subtle inference that light and darkness, good and evil, are merely reverse sides of the same cosmic coin. There are subtler messages in the film. For example, a theme running throughout is that Aladdin is “worthy” to master such power, though we never learn what constitutes his worthiness. The viewer assumes that it is his bravado, cunning, and basically good heart. In reality, none of us is worthy of powers that properly belong to God alone. None of us is worthy of restoration to Paradise. Salvation is Gods gift to mankind by the merits of his death on the Cross. Even so, we have not yet reached our one true home. We have all sinned and fallen short of the glory of God, and in this world no one is capable of wielding evil supernatural powers without being corrupted by them. It is modern man’s ignorance of this principle that is now getting the world into a great deal of trouble. A powerful falsehood is implanted in the young by heroes who are given knowledge of good and evil, given power over good and evil, who play with evil but are never corrupted by it.

Beauty and the Beast handles the problem differently, but the end result is the same — the taming of the child’s instinctive reaction to the image of the horrible. The Beast is portrayed as a devil-like being. He is not merely deformed or grotesque, as he is in the written fable. In the film his voice is unearthly and horrifying; he is sinister in appearance, his face a hideous mimicry of medieval gargoyles, his body a hybrid abomination of lion, bull, bear, and demon. His castle is full of diabolical statues. Of course, the central themes are as true and timeless as ever: Love sees beneath the surface appearance to the interior reality of the person; and love breaks the spell that evil casts over a life.

Yet here too there are disturbing messages: A “good witch” casts the spell in order to improve the Beast’s character, implying that good ends come from evil means. But no truly good person does harm in order to bring about a good. While it is true that good can come out of evil situations, it is only because God’s love is greater than evil. God’s primary intention is that we always choose the good. In the original fairy tale, the spell is cast by an evil sorcerer, and the good conclusion to the plot is brought about in spite of him.

The Disney Beast really has a heart of gold. By contrast, handsome Gaston, the “normal” man, proves to be the real villain. He is a despicable parody of masculinity, a stupid, vain macho-man, who wishes to marry the heroine and chain her to the ennui of dull village life. The Beauty in the original tale embraces the virtues of hard work and the simple country life that result from her father’s misfortune. The Disney Beauty pines for something “better”. There is a feminist message here, made even stronger by the absence of any positive male role models. Even her father is a buffoon, though loveable. This gross characterization of “patriarchy” would not be complete without a nasty swipe at the Church, and sure enough, Gaston has primed a clown-like priest to marry them. (The depiction of ministers of religion as either corrupt or ridiculous is practically unrelieved in contemporary films — Disney films are especially odious in this respect.)

To return for a moment to the question of beauty: A principle acknowledged in all cultures (except those in a terminal phase of self-destruction), is that physical beauty in creation is a living metaphor of spiritual beauty. The ideal always points to something higher than itself to some ultimate good. In culture this principle is enfleshed, made visible. If at times spiritual beauty is present in unbeautiful fictional characters or situations, this only serves to underline the point that the physical is not an end in itself. In Disney’s Pocahontas we find this principle inverted. Dazzling the viewer’s eyes with superb scenes that are more like impressionistic paintings than solid narrative, stirring the emotions with haunting music and the supercharged atmosphere of sexual desire, its creators are really about a much bigger project than cranking out yet another tale of boy-meets-girl. Beauty is now harnessed to the task of promoting environmentalism and eco-spirituality. The real romance here is the mystique of pantheism, a portrayal of the earth as alive, animated with spirits (for example, a witchlike tree-spirit gives advice to Pocahontas about the nature of courtship). The earth and the flesh no longer point to something higher than themselves; they are ends in themselves. The “noble savage” understands this; the white, male, European Christian does not. And as usual, Disney portrays masculinity in its worst possible tight (excepting only the hero, Smith, who is sensitive and confused). The other European males are rapacious predators, thoughtless builders, dominators, polluters, and killers; and those who are not any of the foregoing are complete nincompoops. It is all so predictable, all so very “consciousness-raising”. What child does not take away from the film the impression that, in order to solve his problems, industrial-technological man need only reclaim the lost innocence of this pre-Columbian Eden?

I did not view Disney’s The Hunchback of Notre Dame in a theater but watched the video release at home. The effect of the full-screen experience must have been overwhelming for audiences, because the visual effects in the video version were very impressive, clearly among Disney’s most brilliant achievements in animation. However, I was disturbed by themes that have now become habitual with this studio. Within the first ten minutes of the story a self-righteous Catholic moralist rides into the plot on horseback and chases a poor gypsy mother, who runs barefoot through the streets of Paris, carrying her baby in her arms, in a desperate attempt to reach the sanctuary of Notre Dame cathedral. She stumbles on the steps of the church and dies. The moralist picks up the baby, discovers that he is deformed, a “monster”, and decides to dispose of him by dropping him down a well, all the while muttering pious imprecations against this “spawn of the devil”. So far, not a great portrait of Catholicism. In the only redeeming moment in the film, a priest rushes out of the cathedral, sees the dead woman, and warns the moralist that his immortal soul is in danger. To amend for his sin, he must agree to be the legal guardian of the baby. The moralist agrees, on the condition that the monster be raised in secret in Notre Dame.

In the next scene the baby is now a young man, Quasimodo, a badly deformed hunchback who lives in isolation in the tower of the cathedral. He is the bell ringer, a sweet soul, humble, good, and creative, content to make art and little toys and to observe from his lonely height the life of the people of Paris. His solitude is broken only by the occasional visits of the moralist, who takes delight in reminding Quasimodo that he is a worthless monster who survives only because of his (the moralist’s) “kindness”. Is there anyone in the audience who has missed the point: The moralist is the ultimate hypocrite, the real monster. Quasimodo’s only other friends are three gargoyles, charming, humorous little demons who are reminiscent of the Three Stooges. They encourage him to believe in love, to believe in himself, to have courage. In one interesting short scene, the gargoyles mock a carving of the Pope. Later in the film there is a scene depicting the churchgoers praying below in the cathedral. Without exception they pray for wealth, power, and gratification of their desires—a portrait of Catholics as utterly selfish, shallow people.

A sensual young gypsy woman flees into the cathedral to escape the moralist (who is also a judge). Safe inside, she prays for divine assistance in a vague, agnostic fashion. In stark contrast to the prayers of the Catholics, there is nothing selfish in her prayer. She merely asks for justice for her people. As the music swells, she turns away from the altar, still singing her “prayer”, strolling in the opposite direction of the Catholics who are approaching the altar. Her supplication dissolves into a romantic musing that is more sentiment than insight into the nature of real mercy and justice. Disney’s point is clear: Traditional Christianity is weak, blind, and selfish; “real Christianity” is sociological and “politically correct”.

The romantic element, a mutual attraction between the gypsy woman and a young soldier, is simply a rehash of the screen romances that have become a necessary ingredient in Disney animated films. Lots of body language, lots of enticing flesh, a garish portrayal of the tormented moralist’s secret lusts, a contrasting depiction of the beautiful young couples sexual desire as pure and natural, and a sensual screen kiss that is inappropriate for young viewers (as it is in Aladdin, The Little Mermaid, and other Disney films). Perhaps we should ask ourselves if viewing such intimate moments between man and woman is ever appropriate, even for adults. Is voyeurism, in any form, good for the soul?

The Hunchback of Notre Dame concludes with a frenzied climax in which the forces of love and courage are pitted against the ignorance of the medieval Church. Quasimodo has overcome the lie of his worthlessness through the counsel of his gargoyles and is now strong enough to defy the moralist. He rescues the gypsy girl, who is about to be burned for witchcraft, and flees with her to the bell tower. There the moralist tracks them down (after first pushing aside the ineffectual priest who tries to stop him) and attempts to kill them. As one might expect, he comes to a bad end. The gypsy and the soldier are reunited, and Quasimodo makes do with platonic love. All’s well that ends well.

Based on Victor Hugo’s novel of the same tide (published in 1831), the film retains much of the plot and characterization and even manages to communicate some truths. But the reality-shift evidenced in the modern version is a serious violation of the larger architecture of truth. The truths are mixed with untruths, and because of the sensory impact of the film medium, it is that much more difficult for an audience to discern rightly between the two. This is especially damaging to children, who because of their age are in a state of formation that is largely impressionistic. Moreover, most modern people do not know their history and do not possess the tools of real thought and thus are vulnerable to manipulation of their feelings. Young and old, we are becoming a race of impressionists.

Rather than thinking with ideas, we “think” in free-form layers of images loosely connected by emotions. There would be little harm in this if the sources of these images were honest. But few sources in culture and entertainment are completely honest these days. And even if the mind were well stocked with the best of images (a very rare state), it is still not equipped to meet the spiritual and ideological confusion of our times. The problem is much deeper than a lack of literacy, because even the mental imagery created by the printed word can be merely a chain of misleading impressions, however well articulated they may be. The real problem is religious illiteracy, by which I mean the lack of an objective standard against which we can measure our subjective readings of sensation and experience. Without this objective standard, one’s personal gnosis will inevitably push aside the objective truth and subordinate it to a lesser position, when it does not banish it altogether. That is why a modern maker of culture who feels strongly that Catholicism is bad for people has no qualms about rewriting history or creating anti-Catholic propaganda and will use all the powers of the modern media to do so.

One wonders what Disney studios would do with Hugo’s Les Miserables (published in 1862), an expressly Christian story in which two central characters, the bishop and Jean Valjean, are heroic Catholics fighting for truth, mercy, and justice in the face of the icy malice of the secular humanists, against the background of the French Revolution. Would the scriptwriters and executives sanitize and politically correct these characters by de-Catholicizing them? It would be interesting to observe the contortions necessary for such a transformation. Perhaps they would do what Hollywood did to Dominique Lapierre’s wonderful book, The City of Joy. The central character in that true story, a Christlike young priest who chose to live among the most abject of Calcutta’s poor, is entirely replaced in the film version by a handsome young American doctor (who was a secondary character in the book). In the Hollywood rewrite, the doctor is idealistic but amoral, and he is in the throes of an identity crisis. Uncertain at first if he is merely a technician of the body, slowly awakening to the possibility that he might become a minister to the whole person, in the end he chooses the latter. Following the gnostic pattern, he becomes the knower as healer, the scientist as priest. It is a well-made film, containing some good insights and moving scenes, but by displacing the priest of Christ, it loses an important part of the original story’s “soul”, cheating us of the real meaning of the events on which it is based.

Where Catholicism is not simply weeded out of the culture, it is usually attacked, though the attacks tend to be swift cheap-shots. Take, for instance, Steven Spielberg’s smash hit, Jurassic Park.

Again, there is much to recommend this film, such as the questions it raises about science and morality, especially the issue of genetic engineering. In the struggle between people and dinosaurs there is plenty of human heroism, and the dinosaurs are even presented as classic reptiles—no taming or befriending here. So far so good. On the level of symbolism, however, we are stunned with an image of the reptile as practically omnipotent. The Tyrannosaurus rex is power incarnate, and its smaller cousin, the Velociraptor, is not only fiercely powerful, it is intelligent and capable of learning.

There is a telling scene in which the most despicable character in the film, a sleazy lawyer, is riding in a car with two young children. When a dinosaur approaches the car to destroy it, the lawyer abandons the children to their fate and flees into an outdoor toilet cubicle. The T-Rex blows away the flimsy structure, exposing the lawyer, who is seated on the “John”, quivering uncontrollably and whining the words of the Hail Mary. The T-Rex picks him up in its jaws, crunches hard, and gulps him down its throat. In the theater where I saw the film, the audience cheered.

Where Is It All Leading?

At this point, the reader may be saying to himself, “What you describe may be true. I’ve seen evidence of it, and I’ve struggled to understand it. I’ve tried to pick my way through the flood of things coming at my children, but I’m not having much success. I’m uneasy about the new culture, but I don’t seem to have the skills to argue with it.”

I think most conscientious parents feel this way. We know something is not right, but we don’t quite know how to assess it. We worry that our children might be affected adversely by it, but at the same time we don’t want to overreact. The image of the “witch-hunt” haunts us (a fear that is strongly reinforced by the new culture), but we are equally concerned about the need to protect our children from being indoctrinated into paganism. What, then, are we to do?

Our first step must be in the direction of finding a few helpful categories, a standard against which we can measure examples of the new culture. I have found it useful to divide the field of children’s culture into roughly four main categories:

1. Material that is entirely good.

2. Material that is fundamentally good but disordered in some details.

3. Material that appears good on the surface but is fundamentally disordered.

4. Material that is blatantly evil, rotten to the core.

I will return to these categories in the next chapter’s assessment of children’s literature, where I hope to develop them in greater detail. I introduce them here to make a different point. Two generations ago the culture of the Western world was composed of material that, with few exceptions, was either entirely good (1) or fundamentally good but disordered in some details (2). About forty years ago there began a culture-shift that steadily gathered momentum, a massive influx of material that appeared good on the surface but was fundamentally disordered (3). It became the new majority. During this period entirely good material became the minority and at the same time more material that was diabolically evil began to appear (4). There is a pattern here. And it raises the question: Where is it all leading?

I think it highly unlikely that we will ever see a popular culture that is wholly dominated by the blatantly diabolical, but I do believe that unless we recognize what is happening, we may soon be living in a culture that is totally dominated by the fundamentally disordered and in which the diabolical is respected as an alternative world view and becomes more influential than the entirely good. Indeed, we may be very close to that condition. I can think of half a dozen recent films that deliberately reverse the meaning of Christian symbols and elevate the diabolical to the status of a saving mythology.

The 1996 film Dragon Heart, for example, is the tale of a tenth-century kingdom that suffers under a tyrannical king. When the king is killed in a peasant uprising, his son inherits the crown but is himself wounded when he is accidentally impaled on a spike. His heart is pierced, and he is beyond all hope of recovery. The queen takes her son into an underground cave that is the lair of a dragon. She kneels before the dragon, calls him “Lord”, and begs him to save the princes life. The dragon removes half of his own heart and inserts it into the gaping wound of the prince’s chest, then heals the wound with a touch of his claw. The queen says to her son, “He [the dragon] will save you.” And to the dragon she says, “He [the prince] will grow in your grace.” The prince recovers and grows to manhood, the dragon’s heart beating within him.

The prince becomes totally evil, a tyrant like his father, and the viewer is led to believe that, in this detail at least, traditional symbolism is at work—the heart of a dragon will make a man into a dragon. Not so, for later we learn that the prince’s own evil nature has overshadowed the dragon’s good heart. When the dragon reappears in the plot and becomes the central character, we begin to learn that he is not the terrifying monster we think him to be. He dabbles in the role the superstitious peasants have assigned to him (the traditional concept of dragon), but he never really does any harm, except to dragon slayers, and then only when they attack him without provocation. Through his growing friendship with a reformed dragon slayer, we gradually come to see the dragon’s true character. He is wise, noble, ethical, and witty. He merely plays upon the irrational fears of the humans regarding dragons because he knows that they are not yet ready to understand the higher wisdom, a vision known only to dragons and their enlightened human initiates. It is corrupt human nature, we are told, that has deformed man’s understanding of dragons.

The dragon and his knight-friend assist the peasants in an uprising against the evil prince. Even a Catholic priest is enlisted in the battle. This character is yet another Hollywood buffoon-priest, who in his best moments is a silly, poetic dreamer and at worst a confused and shallow remnant of a dishonored Christian myth. Over and oyer again, we are shown the ineffectiveness of Christianity against evil and the effective power of The People when they ally themselves with the dragon. The priest sees the choice, abandons his cross, and takes up a bow and arrow, firing two shafts into the head and groin of a practice dummy. In a final battle, he overcomes his Christian scruples and begins to shoot at enemy soldiers, quoting Scripture humorously (even the words of Jesus) every time he shoots. An arrow in a soldier’s buttock elicits the priest’s sly comment, “Turn the other cheek, brother!” When he aims at the evil prince, he murmurs, “Thou shalt not kill! Thou shalt not kill!” then proceeds to disobey the divine commandment. The arrow goes straight into the prince’s heart, but he does not fall. He pulls the arrow from his heart and smiles. Neither Christian myth nor Christian might can stop this kind of evil!

Here we begin to understand the objectives that the scriptwriter has subtly hatched from the very beginning of the film. The prince cannot die because a dragon’s heart beats within him, even though he, not the dragon, has corrupted that heart. The evil prince will die only when the dragon dies. Knowing this, the dragon willingly sacrifices his own life in order to end the reign of evil, receiving a spear thrust into his heart. At this point we see the real purpose of the film—the presentation of the dragon as a Christ-figure!

Shortly before this decisive climax, the dragon describes in mystical tones his version of the history of the universe: “Long ago, when man was young and the dragon already old, the wisest of our race took pity on man. He gathered together all the dragons, who vowed to watch over man always. And at the moment of his death, the night became alive with those stars [pointing to the constellation Draco], and thus was born the dragon’s heaven.”

He explains that he had shared his heart with the dying young prince in order to “reunite man and dragon and to ensure my place among my ancient brothers of the sky”.

In the final moments of the film, after the dragon’s death, he is assumed into the heavens amidst heart-throbbing music and star bursts and becomes part of the constellation Draco. The crowd of humans watch the spectacle, their faces filled with religious awe. A voice-over narrator says that in the years following “Draco’s sacrifice” a time of justice and brotherhood came upon the world, “golden years warmed by an unworldly light. And when things became most difficult, Draco’s star shone more brightly for all of us who knew where to look.”

Few members of the audience would know that, according to the lore of witchcraft and Satanism, the constellation Draco is the original home of Satan and is reverenced in their rituals. Here is a warning about where Gnosticism can lead. What begins as one’s insistence on the right to decide the meaning of good and evil leads inevitably to spiritual blindness. Step by step we are led from the wholly good to flawed personal interpretations of good; then, as the will is weakened and the mind darkened, we suffer more serious damage to the foundation itself and arrive finally if we should lose all reason, at some manifestation of the diabolical.

When this process is promulgated with the genius of modern cinematic technology, packaged in the trappings of art and mysticism, our peril increases exponentially. My wife and I have known devout, intelligent, Christian parents who allowed their young children to watch Dragon Heart because they thought it was “just mythology”. This is an understandable naïveté, but it is also a symptom of our state of unpreparedness. The evil in corrupt mythology is never rendered harmless simply because it is encapsulated in a literary genre, as if sealed in a watertight compartment. Indeed, there are few things as infectious as mythology.

We would be sadly mistaken if we assumed that the cultural invasion is mainly a conflict of abstract ideas. It is a major front in the battle for the soul of modern man, and as such it necessarily entails elements of spiritual combat. For this reason parents must ask God for the gifts of wisdom, discernment, and vigilance during these times. We must also plead for extraordinary graces and intercede continuously for our children. The invasion reaches into very young minds, relaxing children’s instinctive aversion to what is truly frightening. It begins there, but we must understand that it will not end there, for its logical end is a culture that exalts the diabolical. There are a growing number of signs that this process is well under way.

In most toy shops, for example, one can find a number of soft, cuddly dragons and other monsters to befriend. There are several new children’s books about lovable dragons who are not evil, merely misunderstood. In one such book, given as a Christmas present to our children by a well-meaning friend, we found six illustrations that attempted to tame the diabolical by dressing it in ingratiating costumes. The illustrator exercised a certain genius that made his work well nigh irresistible. One of the images portrayed a horrible, grotesque being at the foot of a child’s bed. The accompanying story told how the child, instead of driving it away, befriended it, and together they lived happily ever after. The demonic being had become the child’s guardian. One wonders what has become of guardian angels! Such works seek to help children integrate “the dark side” into their natures, to reconcile good and evil within, and, as our friend expressed it, to “embrace their shadows”.

In Lilith, a classical fantasy by the nineteenth-century Christian writer George MacDonald, the voice of Eve calls this darkness “the mortal foe of my children”. In one passage a character describes the coming of “the Shadow”:

He was nothing but blackness. We were frightened the moment we saw him, but we did not run away, we stood and watched him. He came on us as if he would run over us. But before he reached us he began to spread and spread, and grew bigger and bigger, till at last he was so big that he went out of our sight, and we saw him no more, and then he was upon us.

It is when they can no longer see him that his power over them is at its height. They then describe how the shadow temporarily possessed them and bent their personalities in the direction of hatred. He is thrown off by love welling up within their hearts.

The German writer Goethe, in his great classic work Faust, uses a different approach to depict the seduction of mankind. At one point the devil says:

Humanity’s most lofty power,

Reason and knowledge pray despise!

But let the Spirit of all lies

With works of dazzling magic blind you,

Then absolutely mine, I’ll have and bind you!

In children’s culture a growing fascination with the supernatural is hastening the breakdown of the Christian vision of the spiritual world and the moral order of the universe. Reason and a holy knowledge are despised, while intoxicating signs and wonders increase.

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1 Russell Kirk, “The Perversity of Recent Fiction; Reflections on the Moral Imagination”, in Reclaiming a Patrimony (Washington, D.C.: The Heritage Foundation, 1982).

#a landscape with dragons

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