#and wow google wtf how are you dropping the ball so hard??? I got literally zero results twice

[wittywallflower]

absolutely ridiculous that I can know the username, the full text of the post, and the first tag… yet I still cannot just search up that post easily. Either on tumblr search (which I expected to suck because it sucks) or on google. I tried several different keywords on google and it was not until I used super super vague keywords (tumblr (username) (fandom)) that the search results would even show me a single post from that blog, where the user has posted about and tagged that same subject multiple times. It showed me ONE post and it wasn’t the one I wanted. I added ONE keyword to the search to refine it and stopped showing me results from that blog again. Completely infuriating that the only semi-reliable way to find this post again is to go that tag on my blog and scroll forever until I find the reblog of it.

[ace-beef]

AH the Musical bits I love

- the way Michael looks like he’s focusing so hard on keeping to his rhythm in the sync at the beginning 

- “Geeeoooff! Tell us, whAt are we dOIN’ BOI? LET ME HEAR IT BABEEYY!” 

- Michael’s soft “what are we doooing” whisper

- Geoff’s face through the entirety of that part and the song, he looks 10000% done with them all skhfjdds 

- “what’s the last game Lindsay won?” “HEY!”

- “everybody shUT THE FUCK! UP!” [pause] “we’re playing GTA!” 

- the sprunk clusterfuck at the beginning of the first race 

- Gavin jumping onto the part of the track where the others were for the sole purpose to fuck with them 

- the moment Ryan said “I’m somewhat in the air” I knew exactly was about to happen 

- Fiona’s dress during the Still in the Air song!!! It’s so pretty!!! 

- the fact that the lyrics of Still in the Air screamed of a villain song yet the fairly calm and cheerful music of it was the complete opposite of a villain song... like it’s in a major key and is all light and boppy 

- “I’m falling down now, that Newton’s a dick, and soon I’ll be dealing with all of you pricks” 

- how ‘still in the air’ is a joke that is still being made despite the fact it’s origins were back in 2014, normally AH jokes die after like a year at most but somehow the ‘still in the air’ joke hasn’t died and ended up getting a song centered around it

- Fiona and Lindsay at the end ESPECIALLY Fiona dabbing before calmly walking off 

- “he’s back there exerting all over my back end” 

- “sorry Jeremy” “whahappened” [Michael sprunks Jeremy] “AAAAAA” [Michael cackles manically] 

- Jeremy during the entirety of Get Sprunked where he’s just going ape shit in the back

- Michael’s outfit in Get Sprunked 

- “look at you, passing me, as determined as can be, with your foot on the gas, you know what? KISS MY ASS” 

- Michael and Jeremy collapsing to the floor dead at the end of Get Sprunked

- the soft guitar in the Team OG song 

- the fact that neither Geoff or Jack can hold a tune that well but goddamnit the song made me soft anyway 

- “where would I be without Geoffrey” 

- “know that to me you’re worth 100 Gavin Frees”

- “Jack, I wish I could fire you” “I-I think the line is actually ‘I wish I could quit you’” “w-what’d I say?” 

- THE HUG AT THE END OF THE TEAM OG SONG WOW I LOVE MY INTERNET DADS :’)

- the shortest round of Offence Defense we have ever seen

- the moment Jack mentions that his team is up against the Dusk Boys the three of them instantly start fuckin’ around “duuuusskkk” 

- “the O2 has... depleteeedd”

- Jack with the backwards camera to see two black cars go spinning as Gavin screams

- THE DUSK BOYS OUTFITS IN HARD TO BREATHE LIKE DAMN THEY’RE LOOKIN’ GOOD 

- just everything that Gavin does throughout the entire Hard to Breathe song is hilariously funny 

- I am SURE Alfredo has eyeliner on and I’m HERE FOR IT

- the fact that the song sounds like a love song but is actually 100% just about oxygen is fucking hilarious 

- Gavin pretending to choke and the others just breaking out of their boyband characters to panic and make an attempt to help him

-“according to Wikipedia the transfer of oxygen into blood is called diffusion” “oohh y e a h” 

- Gavin dropping his sunglasses on the camera before fumbling to put them back on his face 

- “don’t know how you work but Google makes it sound true” 

- “in 8th grade my science project was about you” (wtf is 8th grade in British language?? Like,, year 7? Year 9?? Idk) 

- Gavin’s wide stance and hip thrust at the end of Hard to Breathe 

- the Dusk Boys high five with them all genuinely laughing and smiling at the end of Hard to Breathe IT MAKES ME FEEL SOFT AND FUZZY 

- “we can thrink-” [realises mistake] “I’M THRINKIN’” 

- “Alfredo do not take deep breaths! Take tiny sharp breaths!” 

- “this works out perfectly because Jeremy was dropped right at the end!”

- the fact that you can tell that Gavin it trying so hard not to laugh during the entire Gavin is a Prick segment

- Sarah sticking her middle fingers up at Gavin with a face of absolute shit-eating glee

- that shot of Matt’s face on the right with a faded out Matt on the left which looks like that Monsters Inc meme 

- “be strong for mummy” 

- Gavin hitting the webcam with his Matt-ball “you fuckin’ nailed the webcam!” 

- “Lindsay what are you in?” “I’m in baby” 

- Lindsay looks GREAT during Lindsay Wins by the way like I never thought I’d say this about Lindsay but after seeing that song she could punch me in the face and I’d be happy 

- “man, children at the office plus kids at home?? SHIIIIT”

- that black and white shot of Lindsay with the crown 

- “Michael shut the FUCK up and make me a sandwich!” 

- at the end “thanks guys bye!” YOU HAVE NO RIGHT BEING THAT CUTE LINDSAY 

- “Quick! Lindsay! Hit Jeremy! Kill that man!” 

- GOD literally everything about the FAHC song like literally this song slaps and I listen to it on repeat as well as watching it over and over again 

- SO. MANY. SLO MO. SHOTS. THEY’RE ALL BEAUTIFUL 

- that Mag King laugh after the opening chorus which I didn’t notice at first is just,,,,, ILLEGAL.... but like in a good way 

- that shot of them all walking in a line like they all look so good wtf 

- THE IN CHARACTER BIT IN THE HEIST ROOM especially the fact that the Vagabond sits there motionless throughout the entire bit

- the lil slo mo suit up shots like somehow they’re all so aesthetically pleasing to watch especially Jack putting on the shirt, Gavin’s face instantly becoming emotionless after he’s got the glasses on and RYAN FUCKING HAYWOOD WITH THE MASK WHILE STARING DIRECTLY INTO THE CAMERA 

- the shot of Ryan and Jack walking along the pavement is really satisfying and idk why 

- “if heaven’s really there we’re only getting in there by stealing the key” THIS!! This line right here is just PEAK FAHC like the vibes from that line my god

- GAVIN TRYING TO CATCH THE PIGEONS WHY IS THIS SO CUTE??? And it somehow fits in perfectly even though it technically does not fit with the ‘badass vibe’ at all 

- that FLAWLESS briefcase pass between the Battle Buddies  

- Geoff’s, Gavin’s, and Michael’s faces in the slow mo running shot 

- just,, Jack in the slow mo running shot,,,, this man is too good for this world

- Lindsay aggressively brandishing a knife like wow EDIT: I JUST NOTICED THAT SHE HAS A TINY GARBO IN HER OTHER HAND WTF I’M LAUGHING SO HARD

- Gavin spinning that briefcase 

- Gavin getting mugged at the end which was simply the icing on the cake of the whole song 

[changji]

Wow you really went off the other day but at least it was worth it 😪 I normally look at the scenery when I’m on a road trip, but then I get bored of it and decide to sleep bc there’s nothing else to do. Motion sickness must suck :(( do you take gravol or something to help with it? Coffee literally drains the life out of my funds it hurts me

Yes omg pls make me cookies I love them. Maybe you can even open a bakery with pastries and sell some good /cheap/ coffee. Ilyt my dear baker 🥺 ye I’m not the biggest fan of my bday either but gotta celebrate anyway!! One year closer to death woohoo 🎉🎉 your birthday is the most important day of the year!!! You can’t fight me on this I’m right

Pearls are so good. Like most places I go to don’t add anything to the pearls so it’s just bland squishy balls but the place I frequent adds I think honey to sweeten them. It gives the pearls life istg. It tastes so good 🤤 hollering is a funny word. For some reason I always associate it with yodelling which makes me laugh

Ksks you must be op if you can make a joke in the wall with a door slam. I can’t relate my arms are literally sticks and I have no strength in me. Chrome books are terrible in general. Add my schools terrible wifi and you get one big recipe for disaster. I’d never fight u either (unless it’s for your bday) ily too much for that 🥺🥺🥺

Hahah I think it’s me. I haven’t heard anyone say “go ham” except for the people who go to my school. I find it really funny tho so I try to incorporate it whenever I can LOL easily burnt? Can’t relate but apparently I easily tan. There’s this one diagonal stripe on my shoulder that separates pale me and tan me which ??? How did that happen and what was I wearing for that to happen??

It’s all fun and games until you go outside and see a mountain of snow waiting for you to be shovelled. But there are some good aspects to winter, like skating and skiing and all that fun stuff. Snow is so heavy?? Or maybe I’m just weak but after I finish shovelling I’m beat. Gardening is not my thing. There’s too many bugs involved flying around 🥴

Kind of? I always thought it was short for cappuccino but I could be wrong. They don’t taste like fraps tho, they’re sm better. I was always a frap hoe until I discovered lattes. My old elementary school was close to a Starbucks so whenever frappy hour was happening, my friends and I would go almost every day LOL

I heard that dunkin coffee is really good. Oof there’s so many things that the us have that Canada doesn’t. But apparently you guys don’t have ketchup chips?? How can one live without them? You know that’s what soulmates are, we’re stuck together forever and I don’t mind that. I’d never leave you 😌😌

YES OMG LATTES ARE SO EXPENSIVE. I pay around the same amount and my wallet cries every time. If you ever yeet yourself off a bridge I’d come visit u in hell and bring u iced coffee 💖 we really are soulmates wtf I get almond milk in my lattes as well!! I used to get normal milk and was like “I’m a bad bitch milk can’t hurt me” but that didn’t really work out. Sigh what we do for coffee 😔

Washing dishes is disgusting. I hate doing them but yk someone’s gotta do it and that someone is me 😤 I’m acc lazy when it comes to smoothies, I usually ask my mom to make them LMAO. Pancakes are pretty much made of flour if you think about it so technically when u eat one plain ur eating cooked flour,, how barbaric. Waffles are Built. Like. They have a 20 pack 😪😪

I love angst personally so pls go ham but not too ham I’d like to keep my heart. Honestly at this point my last brain cell has given up on me. But yes I love angst and I love torturing myself with heart wrenching angst that leaves me crying into my pillow at 3am (I’m talking about this one haikyuu fic that I forgot the name of. I was literally dying inside jalsjwo)

Pls do send me peet’s I’ll send you an iced capp in a cooler so it’ll be somewhat melted and probably spilt everywhere 🤪 tumblrs probably gonna block me again, I’m looking at how much I’ve typed rn and it’s a lot lmaoo. Yes I managed to save myself. I redid the whole last with less detail bc I was not Having It but it turned out better?? How is ur drawing now?

I start after labour day in September. But starting in 3 weeks?????? On a Thursday?? I could never wtf. When do you end? I’m so confused with these ap and honours thing, like there’s none offered in my school nor majority of the school district. Are they just advanced classes or something? It is 7 classes a semester or the whole year?

Stan talent i think you meant yourself??? Jsjsksk I am not only ur coffee soulmate I’m not #1 fan as well and I support u bc ily 🥺🥺 the read more tag had me laughing for a hot minute. Like we really could make an essay out of all of our replies. I don’t have any pets (besides fish does that count?) unfortunately bc my moms allergic to fur 🥺 hbu?? (I can’t believe tumblr blocked me again they can fight me)

-

i didn’t even pay LOL i freeloaded off my cousin 🤧 i like to look @ scenery sometimes but like i can’t bc my head hurts LOL and the scenery is always the same for me, mountains and fields with cows. i try to take dramamine but it makes me so drowsy that i’m just basically dead,,, i live off of my cousins money so i’m okay 🤪

tbh i use nestle toll house pre made cookie dough, like that shit actually slaps. it’s the best it’s so good omg, perfect for lazy hoes 🤧 death here we go ! the order is ur bday, then skz debut date, and then christmas i don’t make the rules sorry sis 😤

pearls are Dangerous, i once drank a smoothie and there were pearls in it and i couldn’t see them bc there were like. only 3 and they were Buried under the smoothie but i choked and almost died but i chewed one of them and it’s like. so weird. HOLLERING AND YODELING IM- i once went to some public yodeling class and left in 2 seconds bc it was a bunch of white boys dressed like the kid from walmart 😪

it’s not even strength i’m actually rly weak,, i always think the doors are closed but they’re not and so i like slam them open and the walls are thin so it’s just. a sad hole. terrible wifi,, my school has pretty good wifi tbh but we have like three connections, one for the chrome books only, one for the teachers & staff, and one for students and guests. like it works rly good but everyone has a VPN bc of stupid social media restrictions 😤 & ilyt 🥺 u would probably win in a fight tho LOL

go ham is so interesting. the first time i heard it i thought it meant go pig and i was so confused but ig,,, i live lathered in sun screen whenever i go somewhere with the sun. ppl are like “i smell sun screen” and im just there like 🙃 it’s me u got a problem u burnt chicken nugget ??? i wish i tanned easily, i have a tan friend and when i showed her when my legs got tan she was so confused. i thought i was tan tho? bc during marching band season my sock tan becomes So Bad i’m basically white. she said she was blinded when she saw me pull my sock down and i laughed so hard LOL & i hate those dumb random tan lines like. where u @ bro? where u come from??

snow is fun for like a day and then i get tired LOL i csn only handle wet socks and a red nose for so long 😔 i tried skiing one time and i did so bad that the instructor had to hold me down and walk with me down the slope. i fell so many times i think he hated me 😳 i’m also rly bad at skating? i went w my friends once and i held both of their hands and still managed to bring both of them down when i fell. a cute guy once helped me when i was struggling to walk so 🥴 not my brightest moment tbh,, trying to walk in skates while on ice. do u enjoy skiing/skating? also gardening is. gross. worms and dirt and the sun i’m not here for it.

u: cappuccinos! me: ...ice bergs,,, now that i think about it fraps kinda suck,,, i used to think i was So Cool for drinking starbucks but now i’m like. wow. i used to think there was coffee in a frap but it’s just. sugar and ice LOL also speaking of tmrw is bogo fraps here,, idk if it’s all over the world but myb u should check it out 😪

dunkins okay it depends on what you get, i once got an iced latte and it was good but my dad got an iced coffee and he like. hated it so we had to switch and it was so bad like. it was coffee crime. it was horrible and not strong it was basically milk 😤 also,, ketchup chip? i just googled what that was and. that’s literally so weird. fun fact i hate ketchup and all other condiments i can only eat bbq sauce and i tolerate steak sauce

UR LITERALLY SO CUTE OKAY UR MINE NOW HHHH

i mentioned this in the other ask but. we going broke bitches club 😪 when u come visit me it’ll be old town road the one w mason ramsey on a loop. nothing will top the og remix but no, i’ll be stuck listening to some 5 year old rap for all of eternity

I USED TO BE SUCH A GOOD KID AND DRINK MILK EVERY MORNING ever since i got to middle school i preferred sleep over waffles and milk and i hardly drink milk but when i do. my stomach does not have it.

my mom made me wash dishes today and she just stared at me when i put ziploc bags on my hands bc we didn’t have gloves but i just painted my nails and i’m not abt to put myself thru chipped nails. not yet 😤 waffles are so good like i love waffles and lattes only 🤧

well i’ll go very ham (am i doing it right LOL) 😤 the angst ending is a lot better than the open ended or happy ones LOL i’m so excited for it 🥺 i’m rly tryna get it out before the end of this month bc the edit says july and it’ll make me Mad if i don’t get it out before the end of this month

i wanna start in september 🤧 and i usually end in the first week of june. also on a wednesday LOL it’s gross. stupid. ap means advanced placement so it’s just. a college level class. lowkey mad bc i’m taking ap euro (as a sophomore 😒) and other schools take it in their senior years? apparently this is normal? and honors are just faster paced classes with more weighting so,, idrk oops 😬 some people take 7 classes in a semester but i took it for the whole year! this year i’m dropping orchestra i’m Not for that spit in the carpet life

the only talent in this house goes by ada and jisung. i don’t make the rules. i’m ur #1 fan 🥺 as soon as u post anything i automatically smash that rb button LOL also put a read more here bc like. we’re really out here writing a whole ass essay. i’ll look @ all our convos bet it’ll be like. a lot. i don’t wanna say smth and be off so i’ll just not. i have a dog! he’s the cutest in the world and i love him sm 🥺 tumblr can fight me first like. what’s this ask limit bull hhhhh

[thegeminisage]

zelda blogging which is so deeply super spoilery, possible the most spoilery it’s ever been, so if you haven’t THOROUGHLY explored the central-north part of the map DON’T read it

aww some of these gerudo wear glasses! love it

i like the music here too but i kinda wish it had been the same melody from oot ; ;

omg riju is tiny!!! is she still young?!

aww her relationship with buliara is sweet they obviously care about each other a lot

AAAAAH THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT MY SWORD lmao maybe i should have gone to get it after all

oh my god a sand seal that gives you words of wisdom for food

ooh i get a free accessory for giving this lady some flint...hmMmMMmMMmmm

topaz i guess bc i'll probs need lightning protection soon? but no, i'm getting a helm...

haha sapphire to go with link's eyes?

ruby bc the flame armor is the ugliest and i wanna wear something else? LOL

went with sapphire iin the end MAY I NOT REGRET IT...

ooooh i shoulda been saving my gems....Dang

i mean, at least i have the 10k i need for the great fairy, but there's so much cool stuff here and i can't bUY ANY...

ah no i did get some opal and amber earrings :3

swim speed up and the ithers are just extra defense

"apparently the accessory maker and the teacher of the relationship class were both in a tragic love triangle, and now they are both single" nintendo this is an all women society please give me lesbians i BEG of you

ok, i need 1 ruby and 5 topaz to finish buying one of everything here. i'll remember

hahahahaha "you've gotta take your time when selecting gems and voe" wise words, lady

omg i found a bar but im too young to drink. nice, nintendo

lmao you can tell one of the ladies you're over 100 and she doesn't believe you dxkfjhg

ok so the hideout of the yiga clan is apparently to the northwest of here so i get to RIDE A SAND SEAL or surf behind one i guess. tbh im a little worried i'll break all my shields :/

i got a gerudo one that i really like!! goes with my scimitar and golden bow!

aww can i not wear accessories along with normal armor...? that sucks

LOL SEAL PUNS the options when talking to the sand seal lady are full of em im dying

wow i can't get this shrine unless i wind sand seal races which i can't do with the divine beast out LOL

jesus those sandstorms look so huge and terrifying...especially since i know they'll disable my map

i wanna explore but tbh i better just stick to the plot and away from those bad boys

oh JESUS i went to an outpost where they're monitoring the beast and it's. so big. and so loud and big and. so scary. oh my god, it's huge

oh FUCK i got too close and it started targeting me so i ran away and thankfully it stopped...definitely gonna take it easy on the exploration if i can help it

oooh no no no why is the air turning green out here...dnw dnw leave me and my map alone!!

uh, and where is my fucking seal...? i left it right HERE

ugh i had trouble mounting the one from before when i stayed in the monitoring outpost do they like leave if you stay gone a long time...? fml

awww this old gerudo never found the lovers pond ):

ugh i see so much stuff i wanna check out but im too scared to get off the seal for long :/ ESPECIALLY if i get stuck in a storm i'll want a way out

oh wow the air is so hot here even my gerudo outfit is useless

tbh, maybe that's a good thing, if i'm eating food i can wear armor with actual defense...much as i love these clothes they're great for getting your ass kicked

ok no seriously WHY does everyone from the yiga clan drop bananas..............

i know that everyone talks about how cool it is that this game just plops you down in the world and lets you figure it out for yourself without hitting you over the head with the instructions

but i just found a bow and some torches in a circle of lit torches with some obviously flammable banners nearby, so

i found the missing gerudo soldier!

"all i've ever seen them do is patrol and eat[in red text] bananas" LMAO WHATS THE DEAL MY DUDES

theres some bananas here on a table wtf do i do throw them at them?? lmao

OMFG LOL IT WORKED

dude pranced right over to it and pocketed it lmao

nooo i missed a chest...maybe i can get it on the way back out ;_;

LOL I FOUND AN ENTIRE ROOM FULL OF BANANAS

this is so funny dkjfgh fck

urgh i wish i could just...snipe them from here. it'd be so EASY

im actually not even totally sure which direction to go, im all turned around

ok, one stationary guy at the door maybe i have to move him?

NOOO I FUCKING FELL THEY SAW ME

i couldn't even fight they one-shotted me and mipha's grace didn't kick in! that isn't fair at all

at least i can get the chest i missed

lol and i cant save in here. perfect.

ok yeah im gonna have to look it up bc as far as i can tell this room has no exit all the hallways just circle back around into it

apparently i CAN fight them...? they're just really hard?

this walkthru is so unclear lol there's a hidden door i can find with magnesis on the right-hand wall WHICH RIGHT...

WAIT fuck i finally see the exit

ah ok. wrong room for the hidden door.

master kohga!! he just...knocked himself out with his own attack. lmao ok

fuck this is SO FUNNY he is so funny

i love it even his bones cracked

isn't what he used to be, apparently

wow this is a boring fight he has a lot of hp and he's so far away the only way i can attack is arrows

and now arrows aren't working anymore...? obviously i'm doing something wrong

maybe i can reflect the rocks back at him

ok google says to drop his things on his head

HAHAHA HIS SPECIAL ATTACK FAILED

this undertale naruto motherfucker im crying i love him

"pretty soon you'll be gone! and not just from my line of sight!" i'm CRYING

fuck the ball rolled on top of him and made him fall

"COWARD! I SHALL BE REMEMBERED!!!"

what a fucking legend i'll never forget you master kohga i promise

aaaand thunder helm retrieved

but i gotta rescue that missing gerudo!

ah good her cell is empty!

lol im skipping sooo many shrines rn...i'll come back to them later i swear

oh NOOOO i got a memory!!!

urbosa the prankster!!! witht he power of lightning at her disposal!! protective of princess zelda!! i'm dying!!!

also im sad so zelda's sealing power mjst be what she used to seal ganon away but apparently in the past she couldn't make it show up for her whole life...?

aw no poor riju the helmet is too big on her

(give it to meeeee)

ok it's time for the divine beast bit but before i do jack or shit im going to upgrade my armor as much as possible rn

ugh you can't enhance the gerudo clothes...geez

FUCK YES HERE WE GO!

aaah riju is talking!!! i always get so surprised!!!

i did it!! tbh i had a really hard time keeping up with her...a dash was too fast but regular speed was too slow

AAH URBOSA IS TALKING TO ME ;_;

ohhh wow it's really walking around while on it

oh man. it's so big. it's so big

oooh you rotate the insides of this one!!

i get the feeling now i should've done more shrines in this area afterall, they have the same sort of electricity theme and they would've been good practice 

okay that was...easily the hardest beast so far

i had to use a guide TWICE and i could barely understand the instructions, PLUS i got two terminals by sheer dumb luck

oooh boy okay a lightning boss im assuming here we gooooo

LMFAO i suck so much at this urbosa was like "there is valor in dodging"

thanks zelda i missed your captain obvious statements

geeeeez i just barely got it

oh EW that never gets any less gross

ohhh my god

"I COULDN'T BE MORE PROUD OF HER" B Y E

oh my gOD?

she mentioned nabooru from oot BY NAME holy SHIT this continutity between games!!!

and "calamity ganon once took on the form of a gerudo that makes this all the more personal" jesus fUCKING christ

i feel so bad for ganondorf the man like

he didn't ask for this shit anymore than link or zelda

and at least they get to win most of the time he always loses and even when he does win he's hated, his win brings ruin

where's the fic where the only way to end the cycle is to become friends with him huh

or like, frankly: the true enemy isn't ganondorf but the evil that takes hold of him

when does he get to be the hero and fight it and smash it to little bitty bits!

oh lord and the blood moon as soon as i get back

do people like, see these towers popping up and beasts moving around? does it scare the shit out of them or make them hopeful?

anyway i hope now i can explore with less sandstorms

oh boy time to ride into a sandstorm gee i sure hope i dont get lost

LOL and first thing i run right into a camp of enemies just bc i was trying to stay in a straight line!!!! jesus

lovely! i am now hopelessly turned around in a sandstorm. i literally don't even know which way i came from

my sand seal is also STUCK lol

ah i passed through it! i'm right where i need to go!

omg I FOUND THE LAST GREAT FAIRY

i'm. i'm 500 short. oh my god

nothing i can't earn with 10 minutes of cooking, tho

huh...? she only asked for 1k...?

i could've SWORN i read someone asks for 10k at one point!

god what if i've been MISINFORMED all this TIME

ooh this one is orange and green

FUCK "i know what you're thinking...can't we just skip to the part where she enhances my clothes?" FUCKING PLAYED

holy FUCK just found my first molduga...i have to KILL one of these for a quest? jesus christ!

ohhh that actually wasn't too bad at all once i figured out the strategy...i've had more trouble with lynels and hinoxes

i'll be honest, the interactive map take a bit of both fun and "work" out of exploring...i look at empty areas and don't wonder "ooh whats over there" but think "ah i can just glance at that bit"

which should make me feel like my Pure Enjoyment of the game is being compromised, and i guess it does a little, but

i wasn't kidding when i said the need to explore was a bit compulsive so it's mostly a relief

ah from up here i see the sandstorm...i think it rotates around the desert? so, it's very possible to avoid and survive even if you do get stuck

anyway i missed several shrines but the quests for them are so complex and i am so Sick

of the desert. even worse than rain tbh

now the question is what to do next: master sword or rito beast

lowkey wanna wait until i get all four beasts before the sword, but

i know you do all four beasts and then ganon and that's it, so if i got the sword then it wouldn't help me for long

plus i'm a little tired of fighting the temperature and changing gear/eating food all the time, so......i guess i'll go check out the forest

maybe i'll see dinaal! i've only seen him once from veeeery very far away

im getting aaaaawfully close to hyrule castle i Dont Like This

lmao every time i catch sight of the divine beasts in the distance, the fact that i can SEE them from THIS far away, blows my fucking mine

they are SO BIG

im getting a much closer look at that flying thing and i'm almost CERTAIN it's a divine beast

just. jesus christ. so BIG

ohhh my gosh i can see the giant pink tree from here *_*

or maybe it's brown, maybe the deku tree is dead lmao

lol straight up skipped the bottomless bog and the enemies at the bottom bc i glided in from death mountain

whoa this tower has rock all over the top??

ah maybe it's so i can't glide to the big tree in the middle lol

not the lost woods if i don't get lost!

lol jk i got on top of it and there was a super cool sword here

aww rauru hillside...im sad

BRO im in the lost woods but its just playing the maze shrine music, i was so hopeful for saria's song

zora's domain having the same music set me up with false expectations t b h

omg if i go too high i die!! i can't follow my higher-ground instict here!!!!!

which is pretty cool but if all i have to do is wander around these woods with my map ON to find the master sword i am gonna be disappointed

even gerudo desert turned it off sometimes

ohhh okay if i wander off the path i also die i can't just go wherever i gotta follow torches i guess

mkay i googled it bc i got stuck and couldn't see anymore torches and it's wind direction! neat

see i feel a little bad about not figuring that out for myself but like...it's not Fun to die over and over bc you can't solve a puzzle. so #realgamers can shut the hell up lol games are for fun

the ember thing is SUPER clever tho and like i know this game is so like, praised bc it stops holding your hand, but i would have appreciated a TINY obscure hint

i did get as far as carrying a torch but i thought maybe i was burning off the fog or smth

omg i found korok forest!!!

oh

there's my sword

said "oh" out loud

kinda wish the quest had been more, idk

but.

mmm not yet. not yet. i'll talk to some koroks first

haha and the very first one tells me to go get the sword all right all right

man. i always remember now that fi's been in there since the ages of skyward sword, sleeping

tbh i kinda miss her 

even though she's way more annoying than navi could ever DREAM of being

for all we complain about compaions, they're a zelda staple and it feels lonely without them

i know not having one makes for a stronger game, i do, but...

really though. the master sword quest was SHOCKINGLY easy. i know i looked up the ember thing but geez it's the first truly disappointing this about this game

and my brother told me they made you work for it lmao but that was. not even close to Work. i've had more trouble at bokoblin camps

like. fucking weak. tbh. i'm so sad like i can't believe this game let me down

OH MY GOD

I TRIED TO TOUCH IT AND THE MEMORIES OVERWHELMED ME

and like at first i was like "ok if link gets his memories back with the sword i'll give them that, that's pretty sick"

AND THEN THE GREAT DEKU TREE STARTED SPEAKING

AND IT WASN'T LOST WOODS MUSIC BUT IT WAS FOREST HAVEN MUSIC

and i straight up burst into tears

"i have watched over hyrule since time immemorial" i know i know i was there i know i missed him so much one of the very first major zelda characters i ever knew i know technically he hasn't been there since the very beginning but he was my beginning

and i didn't even think i cared about him that much emotionally but i also welled up the first time he spoke old hylian in wind waker

oh god link's not WORTHY of the sword yet yes okay i'm here for this i knew this game wouldn't let me down

idk why i never considered the big pink tree might be the deku tree like i joked about it just a few minutes ago but i didn't seriously consider it so i was so surprised

and all the koroks running around and i know i KNOW they used to be kokiri it's almost like i came home, Really Home, the forest was where link began for me, not hyrule proper, he was always a child of these woods

ohhh my god i gotta mop up my face stream is soon!! jesus fuck

oh god now he wants me to pull it again

what if i'm not worthy? what if i am?

i don't have long left to play but i CANNOT leave it here, jesus christ

okay. i'm gonna try. i gotta try. courage!

oh my god it takes your LIFE?

and he said enough when i was down to my last quarter of a heart!! i'm gonna cry i was so close link tried so hard but he wasn't ready yet

i could eat food to max out my hearts but where's the fun in that........

ok. ok. i need to. step back a moment. fuck.

there's hestu! oh my god buddy you finally made it home!! me too pal me too

im gonna save and quit here before i talk to him tho bc like. i gotta stream. but Wow. god Damn

I KNEW THIS GAME WOULDN'T LET ME DOWN!!!!

LMAO I LIED JK im playing a bit more after stream

i talked to the trial korok and "do all the shrines here, it's based on the trials the legendary hero himself did" im crying!!! thats some History!!!

oh my god the koroks are so CUTE??

oh no this is so precious they've been waiting for him

sdfgsfdg "nooo vegetarians everywhere nooo that's my face" i wish i had thought to taka e a snap of that but i cant get him to say it again

aw omg they set up little stores and they only have one of many items please please i'm so proud of them

they set up a little bed for me!! they don't even want my money to sleep there!! i'm sleeping in a tree again, just like i was in oot ;____;

tbh it's so fitting that i did the scary mysterious thing of trying to pull the sword at night and i'm meeting the koroks in the brightness of day

i saw a shield resting on this rock and i had a tiny heart attack like OMG THE HYLIAN SHIELD?!?

ok. ok. i did the trials. i'm gonna see if i can get the sword now??

lol i have the same amt of hearts im not leaving to find a goddess statue and i was trying to boost my stamina anyway but maybe the food boost will help? unless they dont let me use it, we'll see

aaah no it DOESN'T omg

well, maybe one more heart container will do it...?

ugh i don't wanna go back and do the desert ones

me: already fast-traveling

Great, A Sand Storm, Just What I Wanted

fuck i stopped by town and there's a secret club that sells gerudo clothes for men

LOL why.........do they think dudes will feel weird looking pretty? come on

they said there's a high demand so i choose to believe there are lots of gerudo transmen. anyway back to the forest i got two more heart containers i pray it's enough i was SO CLOSE before

I DID IT FUCK I ALMOST DIED BUT I DID IT

IM GONNA CRY JESUS CHRIST

ZELDA SEALED THE SWORD

she's been fighting 100 years and she has so much faith in link

more importantly she heard the sword speak to her im crying fi is in there fi and zelda/hylia meet again

her smile is like the sun, i would do much to feel its warmth upon me again ME TOO PAL im weeping my poor brave daughter i promise i'll save her i promise i promise

it's almost 7am but that was worth it. that was W O R T H I T