#and yrs old stories lololol

[toelessbastard]

NEEED to .ame more two lions . stuff bc theyre living my walls again. I read the manga 4 times today alr LOLOL

[elvensworld]

Did you have a favorite song/s as an under 5 yr old? Do you still like it/them?

My mom says that both Achy Breaky Heart by Billy Cyrus and Baby Likes to Rock It by The Tractors were guaranteed to make me dance. Not bad but also neither are a favorite now. (But also my sister basically yelling Bertha in my face was the only way to change my diaper without me crying so idk what my baby brain was doing lol)

*Asks are sent for fun, no pressure to answer within a certain amount of time or at all.

Lololol. Oh gosh. This is going to be a great story.

Up until I was about 4-6 years old, my sperm donor would play Queen and my mom would play 80s rock. Around 4-6 years old, my Grandfather decided one day while I was over to play a Sarah Brightman cd he loved. The first song that played was “Phantom of the Opera”. I was so intrigued that I wanted to hear it again while prompted my Grandfather to play the original soundtrack. I listened to it so many times over there that he told my mom to let me borrow her cd copy. I started to play it every day to thwart point I started falling asleep to it. I knew every word of the whole cd within a year. Around the age of 10, my Grandfather took me to see the play which had more content than the soundtrack. I was wide eyed the whole time and never realized that they drop the chandelier till it came down (mind you, we were sitting under it and it scared the crap out of me). That was the performance where the phantom tripped during masquerade and made me realize I wanted to go into drama. I saw the play again around 13/14 years old, started drama at 16 (mainly backstage with costumes and hair/makeup), and daily would listen to my mom’s cd. It never left my room. When I was about to move out, I went to return the cds to my mom who said that they were mine now. Since 18, I have seen the play 2 more times and the sequel once. I still have that cd and still know every lyric to every song. I own all the books and little things related to the play/books. I am hoping my kids follow my footsteps in loving the play as well.

Favorite songs: Music of the Night and The Point of no Return

[throwingupmyemotions]

guilt lolll

i only cringe when i try to sound serious so i have this urge to write lol after everything but i also don't want to do that at all. but so basically ughh i don't even feel like using periods anymore

so im not going to

from now on im not using punctuation

ill just make a new paragraph for every thought

no ok this is getting annoying too

ok ill stop but pls know that im so unserious rn and every period i write is written with the highest level of whimsy possible. LOLOLOL ive never said whimsy before idek if i used it right but i couldn't think of the word that i was thinking of. omg this is so fun im actually writing everything that im thinking of!! i tried doing this in my old diary but i couldn't write fast enough to keep up, luckily im a much faster typer ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

OMG lemme start talking about the whole reason i started this. so basically this is just an intro for something else but i think about it a lot

so like i recently had a sort of awakening? kind of? like it was rlly just me growing up and realizing that the world doesn't actually revolve around me. but like in the best way possible bc i thought everyone's lives around me were perfect and i was the only imperfect one but now i realize everyone has their own problems which ik sounds like smth i should've realized as a kid but idk ig im just rlly dumb and self involved.

so anyway, i have always felt guilt pretty heavily like as a kid i would end up confessing to my parents anytime i did anything wrong because the guilt would literally eat me alive. ooh i have a rlly funny story

i was in like 6th grade and it was that time where i started getting all horny and curious. but the thing is i was suuuper sheltered like i don't even think i knew what sex was until like highschool and so i didn't know what was going on yk. all i knew is that looking at boobs made me feel some type of way( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) HAHAHA

OK SO I WOULD LOOK UP CLEAVAGE PRANKS ON YT LIKE EVERY DAY BECAUSE BOOBS IS A BAD WORD AND I CANT JUST TYPE BOOBS

its crazy bc i felt guilty but i didnt even know why?? like im a girl so ofc im curious about what my boobs will look like one day right??? no yeah that excuse stopped working after a yr when i realized i was feeling stuff yk so i completely stopped watching them

it had been about a month since i stopped and i thought the guilt would go away but it literally got worse. so i was lying in bed, and at this point i couldn't even sleep it was so bad, my stomach was hurting and i couldn't stop crying so eventually i went and woke my parents up at 3 am and i was crying so hard that i was like gasping for air so they were both terrified

i sat them down and it took me like 10 minutes to finally speak

and i told them "ive been watching bad videos"

and they started laughing

i cant make this up

it was so embarrassing

so anyway now that you get an idea of what my guilt was like then, its definitely a lot better now but it transformed into me feeling guilty about things that i cant just fix with a confession which makes it harder

ik life is unfair and thats just how it is and we're supposed to just accept it but its soooo hard like sooo hard for me to accept

and im so fucking lucky like im rlly starting to realize how lucky i am now but omg im so grateful for everything that i have but like i don't deserve this at all yk? like i didn't do anything to deserve this life and it makes me feel so shitty like im not a good enough person to get all of this and i feel guilty so i feel like helping ppl is the only way to get rid of the guilt but that's so selfish so then i feel like an even worse person and i feel more guilty and its this crazy cycle that i just made up but idk. im obviously self aware enough to realize that me feeling like i don't deserve the life i have is a me problem. and ik ive been obsessed with the idea of being a good person like my whole life but my awareness of the obsession only makes me feel terrible. like how can i even be a good person anymore if anytime i do anything good i think its fake? and another recent worry that i have is that i have a savior complex which definitely is what this paragraph sounds like. like i feel like since i got so lucky its my "duty" to help other ppl bc it could easily be me in that situation yk.

i obviously have a weird relationship with guilt and my own self image so i wrote this story a long time ago. like a rlly rlly long time ago. this is one of the first things ive ever written for pleasure bc i used to hate writing. so like its obviously not good but it makes me feel things so i wanna put it in here

standing on the damp stone floor barefoot, you look up to see yourself in some kind of cave with an eerie glow illuminating what would be complete darkness.  you feel empty- or maybe blank would be a better word, nothing is in your mind, no memories or significant thoughts. but more than that, no emotions- even the realization that you are naked doesn’t bring panic.  trying to think what your shivering wet body is doing here, bare and alone in a dark cave, you almost don’t notice when you see a figure approaching you. the unusual lack of anxiety as you’re waiting allows you to notice it’s odd movement almost like the unknown being is floating. now it is close enough that you make eye contact, and everything comes back.

all of your memories and emotions overwhelmingly flood your brain pushing you to a crouched position on the floor.  as you cradle your head in pain, you squint up at the once unknown figure now in front of you. though you’ve never met before, you somehow instinctively know exactly who it is and what their presence means for you.  the inevitability of the situation leaves you feeling less scared than you should be and more tired from the waiting.  in fact you were exhausted, waiting practically your whole life for this, your fear easily overshadowed by your impatience.  defeatedly standing up, you take a step forward, giving your soul to the devil.

he looks at you with what impossibly seems like sympathy.  gesturing for you to present your forehead, you  squeeze your eyes shut and raise your head.  while you feel numb to most of your emotions, you can’t help but feel the shiver of terror that goes through you as you wait with your forehead bared.  after what feels like hours you finally feel a soft touch to your forehead, almost like—

your eyes snap open to find him lifting up from the kiss.  a kiss. on your forehead. he kissed your forehead. wondering if this was a trick to make the resulting torture worse, you look up at his face only to see it engulfed by sadness, tears threatening to fall out of the devil’s eyes.  you don’t understand, this isn’t what you deserve.  finally feeling an emotion, you are panicking.  you had been waiting to be punished, getting what you deserve is what should be happening it’s what needs to happen. ‘it can’t end like this it can’t end like this it can’t end like this it can’t end like this’, repeating in your head.  you hysterically look up to see tears silently flowing out of the monster and belatedly realize you’re sobbing too, echoes of your panicked wailing filling the cave.  desperately trying to spark a reaction, you push the devil hoping he will retaliate but he only stands there, continuing to silently cry for you. 

*LOL GET IT my guilt was my punishment but fun fact: my parents actually did this like they almost never punished me for anything bc my guilt was enough

[il-eux]

top redraw, below attempted sketches, bottom og from 2 yrs ago

this...took so many steps. first it was a messy sketch color style test back in 21 (that makes me sound so old LOL) but i was too shy to post it anywhere since it differed a lot from what i usually drew. i wasn't quite satisfied with it, but i was also really embarrassed so it stayed in the folder (i did like the eyes tho)

then here i am two years later looking for stuff to redraw and was like sure why not. at first i tried just working with the original and transforming parts and coloring over...which could only help so much. SO i decided to try and sketch a redraw. the one on the right made better sense positioning wise, but it didn't have the same feel i was originally going for.

the one on the LEFT went through so many stages. i tried redrawing it to have more of the feel i was going for at first with my current style kinda mixed in but i COULDN'T. GET. THE. ARM. RIGHT. and THE HEAD ANGLE JUST WASN'T WORKING. (not very cash money ú_ù) the hair wasn't really doing it for me either so we come to REDRAW ATTEMPT 3. where i changed the hair to that of another character i had in mind but the funny thing is that then i didn't like the color of the hair, but in changing it im like OH these characters fit the vibe i was going for for ANOTHER set of characters we have for a DIFFERENT story so im like cool, lets just combine these stories or well like, the character i had in mind at first was the mermaid dude but that'll be an AU maybe of these two LOLOLOL

[dasketcherz]

2015 vs 2017

I found this drawing I had that I still freshly remember that I doodled during practice for my high school graduation so I decided to redraw them to see how different my style is from before and now lmao

These two changed my life for college, I owe them my motivation to graduate and I love them so much

[ilikedetectives]

Hi, did you play every AC game? If yes, in term of game plays which are the easiest? For someone without much experience in games, ty!

Not every AC game, because I can handle only so much of cookie cutter games at a time. Before I say more, lemme get this out of the way first: I played the Ezio trilogy back in 2018 because Da Vinci’s Demons was cancelled and I wanted more Da Vinci content and the white and red hoodie looks cool. In other words, I didn’t play the game because it’s called Assassin’s Creed.

The AC games I played so far, by the order of which one I play first. I’ll rate gameplay by my personal preferences (because it’s the only way I know how).

Ezio’s trilogy (AC2, AC Brotherhood, AC Revelations, played in 2018): decent parkour, minimal grind (just invest in the villa and you’re a millionaire in a day or two), very story focused (perfect balance of historical and modern plots). Decent combat. The golden years of AC and I agree.

Unity (played a few months after Ezio): good parkour, medium grind (bigger map and more items to upgrade, you still get to invest in properties so it helps). Time-saver items are on sale for real money aka MTX (ew). Combat is ok, not much difference since Ezio. Historical story is meh (I don’t care for Arnold because Elise’s story is more interesting) and they completely ditched the modern plot (you think Odyssey has little modern day plot, try Unity). Buggiest AC game I encountered and I played this game 4+ yrs after launch (hold on to that thought, keep reading). Ubi spent all of their time and budget doing the interior design (which is gorgeous btw) that they have none left to fix the bugs.

Black Flag (a few months after): chasing flying papers is my favorite activity to NOT do. Grindy af (no property investment). I can’t tolerate the controls for the ship so I hate everything that involves ship in this pirate game, except for sea shanties. You’ll have more fun playing this game as a pirate than an assassin. Combat feels the same since Ezio. Other mechanics are like Unity (understandable). Modern plot is minimal, but it makes bloodline irrelevant and there’s a....soul inside a computer server that wants to possess a human body, meanwhile said soul’s husband is a maniac who has unlimited reincarnations (realism, I know). Black Flag is the gateway game that convinces me that I should stop wasting my brain cells in “what kinda bs realism is dis?”

Odyssey (a month after launch, bought solely because of Kassandra also when I heard Odyssey is set before the creed, oh fuck yea I don’t need to sit through another rehash of Creed crap or at least minimal anyway): oh gods a breath of fresh air from the old controls where you have to hold R2 whenever you want to run and my fingers hurt sfm. Climbing is the best because the protag actually moves where you want them to move. MTX (ew). Grindy but because the combat and movements are smooth, best combat so far; I don’t see Odyssey as grindy because I enjoy my time playing (also Kassandra); I platinum the game on PS4 at around 130 hrs I think, could’ve been earlier but photomode. Fun quests that I giggle whenever thinking about them (I don’t remember shit about any quests in any other AC game, but then again Kassandra). People bitch about no parkour but who parkour in the 450BCE?!?!? Full disclosure: I never cared for parkour and never will. I stop caring for modern plot after how Unity and Black Flag handled it. Playing Odyssey makes me realize that I enjoy AC games more if idgaf for the AC aspect, rather, I play for the fictional historical tourism aspect. Just ditch the AC and voila, blue sky and fresh air. Playing Odyssey also makes me realize that I want a spin-off IP that focus on the Isu so we can go full fantasy. Do I need to say how pretty Odyssey is? lol

Origins (planned to play Origins first, but Kassandra. Also, I remember Amunet from AC2, but somehow we play as a dude in Ancient Egypt, I’m not too eager to find out, despite I prefer Egyptian mythology over Greek and I’d like to thank Yu-gi-oh for that): combat is clunky, heavy, and slow, though no need to hold R2 to run so phew. Grindy af. The bow mechanics is a decade outdated (Horizon Zero Dawn came out the same year and oh boi the difference is night and day, oh yea I played HZD before Origins. I get it the bow isn’t the focus but does it have to feel like Skyrim in 2017?). I’m glad I play this game for the Ancient Egypt (which is beautifully designed *chef kiss*) aspect and no more. 

Syndicate (I play this along side of Origins, still haven’t finished it though. Literally bought the game for Evie and I nut over Victorian fashion): combat is no different from Unity. Grindy like Black Flag and Unity. Story is meh in both historical and modern plot so far. Evie is the only reason I’m still trying to play this game. At least the Helix outfits are included in the Gold edition of the game. Victorian London is gorgeous tho.

Valhalla (only care for this game because Eivor. Tbh after God of War and Hellblade, idc for another Viking game): game is buggy af, buggiest AC game I’ve played. Combat is like Origins but worse: the only saving grace is the finishing move & the bow mechanic hasn’t been improved since Origin; I honestly would rather have combat from the Ezio games over whatever-this-is. You have to toggle a button to run now, which is dumb af because I miss Origins and Odyssey automatic run. They bring parkour back (because Vikings totally dig parkour back in the Dark Ages) as well as the-character-doesn’t-move-where-you want-them-to from the older games. Chasing flying papers from black flag is back, no thx. Looting enemies is useless, but hey you get to run around to look for a key or two or THREE to get some minimal amount of materials; so imagine if 2/3 of every chest in Origins and Odyssey are locked. Oh! You have manually pick berries/food to heal, no healing potion, wtf is this half-ass RPG shit? Side quests, oh sorry World Events, aren’t tracked in an open-world game (guess who hasn’t been doing these bitches?). Grindy af. I’m wasting my time looking at the skill points interface (you have 99 lv in Odyssey, 55 in Origins, 403 power in Valhalla. A game doesn’t feel like grindy if you level up every 2 quests for 403 times, does it? lololol). The useless SP tree is so massive that I just don’t use the skills I acquire because it takes too much time to find out which buttons to push to locate the 10 skills in this 403-dot clusterfuck, but the astronomy design is beautiful (gotta give credit when it’s due). Scummy practice from Ubi: releasing “time-saver” pack AFTER reviews are published. Also, who wanna bet there will be more mtx outfits than in-game outfits? Don’t worry, Ubi makes inventory management cLEaNeR for you *hands over 8 outfits for an RPG game*. The free event bugs tf out of your already buggy event, but hey, you’ll get a free outfit that’s a reskin of what you already have, teeheee be grateful. Eivor is amazing but by the gods playing this game is a chore. Tbh I only play Valhalla if I don’t feel like playing Ghost of Tsushima that day. Lastly, why is England so yellow like it’s Ancient Egypt?!?!? And why the sunlight moves faster than Eivor’s running at full speed? Which parts of this game does realism count?!?!?!?

Unsolicited opinion: GoT is an example of how an AC game should be and how DLCs should be handled, but with Ubisoft it will never be and I’m so fucking glad that it is Sucker Punch Prod which handles feudal Japan with utmost respect and realism. See how “honor” is handled in both games and compare the writing. Ubisoft should have announced ding dong AC is dead and create a new IP, but AC is their most financially successful franchise so expect more of this MTX, I mean, grindy RPG approach with minimal narrative. 

[phastelpink]

i've been following you for years (definitely since spn) and the fact you fell into anime has me cackling (in a good way because i love anime too) and i just wanted to know what happened lol

oh my god, so long??? spn feels like a lifetime ago - you know what, I defo don’t wanna think about how long it’s been (but thank you for sticking around that long xx 💖)

tldr; it was my flatmate’s 6 yr old little brother’s fault and he didn’t even know what naruto is

MY GOD IT’S THE FUNNIEST AND STUPIDEST THING EVER AHSHbshdhdh like okay so, around this time last year my flatmate’s little brother was visiting us and I think he was around 6 years old then? anyways, they’d forgotten to pack his own kiddie PlayStation games with him and He Wants To Play Something Or Else so my flatmate is frantically going through her games to find something a kid could play? and hello, there’s this random naruto shippuden game that I don’t think she even knew she owned (bought a bunch of games and the console as a deal from a friend) and it was like the only game that had lower recommendation age than 16+ so... naruto it is? add here some jokes made about lololol naruto hahahaha this is so stupid, what if us like 15 years ago would see this

anyways, they start playing it and obv none of us have any idea what on Earth is happening and who the fuck are all these characters (why does that one dude have so much eyeliner???). he leaves the next day and we’re left a bit interested like hmm... hmmmmm...... and joke a bit more about haha imagine if we turned into naruto fans in 2020 HAHAHA INDEED, HA HA BITCHES ONLY IF YOU KNEW

but the interest Had Awoken and we LOAN FROM THE LIBRARY (happy to pay my city tax xoxo for once) the first couple dvds boxes and set out a date to my birthday weekend and suddenly it’s like 3am and we’re fucking hooked and then it’s lockdown time and we basically have nothing else to do but watch naruto and we power through like 700 episodes in like less than three months

(then I try to pretend that was Enough Anime for me until I’m v v bored during the summer and see someone I follow on Instagram post a story of “omg how cool fight!!” and I’m once again 👀👀, find out it’s bnha and I just.... keep watching stuff cause behold, before I even noticed I’d became an anime fan when i was 28 and basically kept watching everything I’d blacklisted since 2013 cause karma is a bitch, THE END

(also!! if you have anything to recommend, please do!! 👀👀👀 or what are your faves? xxxx)

[partygetsmewetttttter]

Questions 1-85 🤷🏽‍♂️ if you're down lol

Faaaacccckkk okok lol

1. Are looks important in a relationship?Tbh kind of2. Are relationships ever worth it?Yeah you just have to wait for the right one to come uk3. Are you a virgin?No sometimes I still wish I was tho like I wish I would have waited until I was married like how I planned to lol i wanted to lose it in a special way but it didn't happen4. Are you in a relationship?Hellll naaaaa5. Are you in love?No6. Are you single this year?Yeah and next yr too and the yr after that7. Can you commit to one person?Yes I can. Rn I can flirt w the whole world but I swear once I'm in a relationship I cut everyone off and keep you happy even if I can't keep myself happy and it sucks cus that's how I get taken advantage of 8. Describe your crushI don't like anyone rn 9. Describe your perfect mateTaller than me, kind of gordito, always talking, always giving me attention, down to stay in on a Friday night and watch movies w cudddles, able to smoke a fat bluhnnnnt w me, funny, mean to everyone but only nice to me, enjoys to fight w me like being able to roast me so I can roast back I don't want to pussy ass bihhhh, able to handle me cus there's days I have an attitude I love to talk shit lmaooo, respects me, treats me good, buys me food, likes hickeys, opens the door for me jus so he can smack my ass hehe, grand my ass 25/7, is a lil freak in the sheets JUST 4 ME like if we can't bust a quick upstairs while th fam is downstairs u ain't for me, and one who loves me ((((:10. Do you believe in love at first sight?No it's just lust 11. Do you ever want to get married?Yes. Nothing beats waking up to the love of ur life every morning and sleeping every night, being able to kick him while u sleeping and eating all his food that he said not to eat and fighting bcus he eats my Greek yogurt after he specifically said he didn't like it or fighting over who gets to sleep in the side of the wall and being able to jog all the cobijas hehe and being able to travel w him 12. Do you forgive betrayal?It depends tbh. I feel like some people deserve second chances bcus if you know they have good intentions and didn't mean to fuck up then give it a second try cus everyone makes mistakes you just have to learn from them uk 13. Do you get jealous easily?Already answered this one14. Do you have a crush on any one?No15. Do you have any piercings?I have double piercings on each ear, and my belly button 16. Do you have any tattoos?No I want one tho )))):17. Do you like kissing in public?Fasaack yessss like grab my face and show these nigguhs u own me hehe 20. Do you shower every day?Yeah right before I go to sleep bcus I just lay there naked lol 21. Do you think someone has feelings for you?No lololol22. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?Highly doubt it23. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat?Yesssss already did 24. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?Nah I'll be too busy working on my masters 25. Do you want to be in a relationship this year?Kind of cus a big getting lonely asf ya feel26. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you?Yes but he lied lmaoooo he broke up w me cus I went to college 27. Has someone ever written a song or poem for you?Not that I remember 28. Have you ever been cheated on?Yaaaaa29. Have you ever cheated on someone?Nope30. Have you ever considered plastic surgery? If so, what would you change about your body?Tiddy implants and liposuction 31. Have you ever cried over a guy/girl?Duh lmao u didn't have a childhood if u didn't play some t-pain and cried lol 32. Have you ever experienced unrequited love?What does that mean lol 33. Have you ever had sex with a man?Yeah 34. Have you ever had sex with a woman?No35. Have you ever kissed someone older than you?Oh yeahhhhhh lol older guys know what they doinnnnnnnnngggggggg omg 36. Have you ever liked one of your best friends?Yes37. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated?Yes 38. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to?Yes39. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?Yes40. Have you ever written a song or poem for someone?Yes41. Have you had sex so far this year?No )))):42. How long can you just kiss until your hands start to wander?Already answered 43. How long was your longest relationship?1 yr 3 months 44. How many boyfriends/girlfriends have you had?Only 2 serious relationships 45. How many people did you kiss in 2012/2013?46. How many times did you have sex last year?Uhhhmmmmm idk like 247. How old are you?1948. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say?Que le vaya bonito y que chingue su madre todo lo que no sirva hahaha 49. If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, what is your favorite thing about him/her?Their hands and laugh and cuddling abilities 50. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept?Ehhhhh i think I would lol I miss him at times and all the live we shared 51. Is there a boy/girl who you would do absolutely everything for?My dad52. Is there anyone you’ve given up on? Why?Yeah cus they weren't serious about me so why even keep trying 53. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are?Yeah probly lol 54. Is there someone you will never forget?Yeppppp55. Share a relationship story.Too lazy to type 56. State 8 facts about your bodyIm fat. My left thumb is fatter than my right thumb. I have a scar on my left ear. Uhmmmm i don't have s thigh gap. My belly is pierced. My right eyebrow is better than my left. I have a scar on my forehead. And I'm fat 57. Things you want to say to an exPos58. What are five ways to win your heart?Already answered 59. What do you look like? (Post a picture!)Ugly 60. What is the biggest age difference between you and any of your partners?7 yrs lol 61. What is the first thing you notice in someone?Answered 62. What is the sexiest thing someone could ever do for/to you?Make breakfast for me and take it to bed then start besándome and uk how that gooooes63. What is your definition of “having sex”?Answered 64. What is your definition of cheating?Answered 65. What is your favourite foreplay routine?A deep passionate kiss then kissing the neck then nibbling the ear then leaving bites in the neck and chest and going down the tummy then the rest is for me to know66. What is your favourite roleplay?Teasing w my tongue hehe 67. What is your idea of the perfect date?Anything w food lmao 68. What is your sexual orientation?Str869. What turns you off?Too much aggressiveness like demanding aggressiveness that's not sexy lol idk hard to explain 70. What turns you on?Answered 71. What was your kinkiest wet dream?Uhhhhh .....72. What words do you like to hear during sex?"Who's daddy" "you're so wet" "oh fuck" "baby" haha I'm wild 73. What’s something sweet you’d like someone to do for you?Give me a million dollars 74. What’s the most superficial characteristic you look for???? I don't get it 75. What’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for you?When it would be cold outside my ex would pump my gas for me ))))):76. What’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever done for someone?Give him my virginity lol 77. What’s your opinion on age differences in relationships?As long as both people are not underage you good 78. What’s your dirtiest secret?Lmaooooo too private 79. When was the last time you felt jealous? Why?Everytime bae adds girls in Facebook and likes their picture 80. When was the last time you told someone you loved them?Today 81. Who are five people you find attractive?Idk everyone ugly lol82. Who is the last person you hugged?Bae83. Who was your first kiss with?My 8tj grade "boyfriend" lol84. Why did your last relationship fail?He started becoming really abusive and we were both too hard headed so when we would fight we'd throw everything from the past to each other's face and say shit to each other that we didn't mean just to get each other mad, our first official break up I talked to someone else and he got mad and ever since that he would call me a hoe and a slut and call me names and it just wasn't the same anymore we would only fight bcus of his trust issues and shit and eventually I moved to a diff town for college and he ended things 85. Would you ever date someone off of the Internet?Yeah depends tho

[baereaved]

All of the odd-numbered OC asks!! >:3c

u devil~ thank u for all the asks omg

send me some oc questions~

1. Your first OC ever?

kairos. i think. probably.well in all honesty i had plenty of self-inserts before him OTL OTL OTL but i think  he was the first proper oc i madei might just think he was first bc he was the first one i hallucinated, but eh. he’s been around a good while

3. Have you ever adopted a character or gotten a character from someone else?

i haven’t omgstraight up didn’t know that was even, like, a thingsomeone let me adopt ur child

5. If you could make only one of your OCs popular/known, who would it be?

screamsmorgan, probablyi mean u can’t rlly know morgan w/o knowing the other dozen ppl in his universe anyways sOplus he’s adorable and important to me, so who better, reallyi feel like he’d be the one i’d write about if i was gonna, like, make a book or webcomic or smth

7. Are your OCs part of any story or stories?

in the sense that i’ve made them up, then yesand in the sense that some of them are ocs for other actual stories, then also yesin the sense that i’ve ever written anything for them, absolutely noti’m way too lazy to write OTL OTL OTL

9. Would you ever be willing to give any of your OCs to someone else?

i mean someone can take catboy if they really want them like they were a Mistakebut for the most part i quite like having them all to myself lolololol

11. Is there any OC of yours you could describe as a “sunshine”?

jesúswhich makes sense, considering his namesakein my mind when i made him i was like “if ur gonna name him jesus u can’t be givin him all the perfect traits like he still needs flaws and things” and then that just. didn’t happenhe is sweet and gentle and quiet and kindand also he’s traumatized and terrified of acting out and he screams in his sleepbc i’m a terrible person and i love to torment my smol kids

13. Do you have any troublemaker OCs?

god, all of themcielle, notably, since she will fuck u up and also. winters. she’s literally my dgm oc whose general is winters and they get along terrifyingly well, so. yes.also katrina and benji and dessa and hendrik and reese and rien and nyla and listen, i could go on

15. Do you like to talk about your OCs with other people?

yes, absolutelyi also enjoy it when ppl tell me abt their ocs, mostly so i can grill them for oc info lololol

17. Any OC OTPs?

jesús and luc, dessa and shiv, olivia and ekundayo, rien and the sweet embrace of deathi rlly need more couples so, like, subject to change

the rest are under the cut~

19. Introduce an OC that means a lot to you (and explain why)

i don’t think i even could pick oneumi haven’t mentioned enlil yet, i suppose, and i mean? he’s not very developed, but he brings me an indescribable amount of peace when i talk/think about him, soi’m not actually sure if it’s okay for me to use that name, but eh. if not people can yell at me and i’ll change it. names are hard sometimesbut anyways i don’t have much of anything on him? he’s deaf. generally pretty calm and relaxed. like shiv, except actually a good personidk what it is abt him, he just?? puts me at peace? makes me feel good? like i only made him last year but he’s like, the personification of what nostalgia feels likeso he’s really important to me just bc of how comforting he is. like just thinking abt him could probably get me out of an anxiety attack

21. Your most artistic OC

santa is my nameless oc (as in, the game. he clearly has a name) so 1. he is art and 2. he is an artist himself lol, mostly a painterhelena is pretty artistic too, and is a sculptor

23. Introduce OC that has changed from your first idea concerning what the character would be like?

already answered~

25. The OC that resembles you the most (same hobby, height, shared like/dislike for something etc?)

listen okay all of them started out as self-inserts. all of them. they’re all at least partially based off me.i’ve been thinkin abt this for an hour and i still can’t come up with anything OTL i’m p similar in different ways to all of them, so i’ll have to leave it at that lol

27. Any OCs that were inspired by a certain song?

already answered~

29. Which one of your OCs would go investigate an abandoned house at night without telling anyone they’re going?

nyla, for fun, and benji, bc he’s Cool and Edgy and mr. survivalist who would probably be an actual detective if he wasn’t, like, 14

31. Pick one OC of yours and explain what their tumblr blog would be like (what they reblog, layout, anything really)

i was gonna talk abt my bae rosaire here but he’d be a youtuber, somona is my edgy 13 yr old bab who would probably have a blog full of anarchist shit and different alternative rock lyric postsalso, she’d be part of that shoplifting side of tumblr

33. Your shyest OC?

rosetta nicoletteshe’s the softest and purest and everyone needs to protect her

35. Any sibling characters?

pollux and isabela……i think that’s it. i need more siblings asap

37. Introduce an OC who is not quite human

santa’s a doll. dessa and shiv are a demon and angel, respectively. i have a couple other angel charas too that don’t have names yet but are gorgeous, so |D also all my space charas aren’t human. opluxx is an ogre. i think. catboy is self-explanatory.

39. Introduce any character you want

ekundayo is my beautiful bab and also olivia’s long-distance gfi haven’t done a ton of development on her but i love her bc listen they’re one of those relationships where olivia is literally the most stoic intense fucker around who will kill u and ekundayo is the purest and softest around everyone but then u see them together and olivia’s obviously happy and totally whipped by her sweet but also unexpectedly dom gf and i love them, okay

41. Has anyone drawn fanart of your OCs? If yes, maybe show a picture or two here (remember sources & permissions!)

well. yes, but we had a falling out since then, so i feel it’d be wrong to post it herei’d love to see some more fanart of my ocs~ i should commission smth from someome sometime

43. Do you have any certain type when you create your OCs? Do you tend to favour some certain traits or looks? It’s time to confess

already answered~

45. A character you no longer use?

o'malley johnson, valentia, kiriko and akumukiriko and akumu were my old bleach ocs, o'malley johnson was just a kickass dude, and valentia was my stereotypical yandere childsimce i don’t care for bleach anymore and i don’t have universes for valentia or o'malley johnson, i haven’t done much w/ them, but i still like the last two

47. Has anyone ever (friendly) claimed any of your OCs as their child?

i don’t think so? maybe. hmu

49. Which one of your OCs would most likely enjoy memes

god, rienrien would be the worst anti-sjw shitty memelord and i ha te

[t-shrt]

100 q tag

no one wud read it but ima do it anyways cos fun tag by @dubblebubble

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk? more cereal than milk cos i love tht crunchy crunch

2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day? LOVE

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books? receipts, pen lol

4: how do you take your coffee/tea? coffee=basic latte/hot tea, no sugar

5: are you self-conscious of your smile? sometimes, not too often tho

6: do you keep plants? no but i want to but ill be terrible at it so no

7: do you name your plants?

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings? digital art

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself? yes very it keeps me sane

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach? side/back, back esp nowadays

11: what’s an inner joke you have with your friends? lots lol

12: what’s your favorite planet? earth? hahahah it used to be jupiter cos i loved sailor jupiter as a child

13: what’s something that made you smile today? friend + nct + fics

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like? two separate bedrooms, a balcony, good amount of plants, separate fridge for alcohol, sizeable kitchen

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is! it rains diamonds in jupiter and saturn $$$$

16: what’s your favorite pasta dish? bolognese hahahaha im boring

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair? i just dyed my hair a darker ash brown n i quite like it ive been light for awhile

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up. one came 2 mind cos we both recently talked ab it, a longtime close friend of mine n i used to have the biggest fight where he threw me a pair of scissors n i threw him a basketball in retaliation lmfaooo it still became a running joke more than a decade later...

19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it? not really...prolly shud

20: what’s your favorite eye color? i actually like brown hahah, maybe a slightly lighter shade of brown

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces. it was a gift from my parents, a simple small messenger bag with a lot of slots, brought it with me literally everywhere, during my hookups, my night outs, been stained with questionable things (its been cleaned lol!).... almost lost it in a club only to be found by a friend... it has foundation stains tho lol

22: are you a morning person? n o

23: what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations? sleep, listen to music, watch stuff, not reply to messages

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets? no

25: what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into? nothing rly comes to mind but im p sure ive been somewhere like tht lol

26: what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit? LOL my adidas superstars

27: what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor? ermm the red colored ones?

28: sunrise or sunset? hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm very good question

29: what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing? hmm what comes to mind is the way both of us sometimes exchange goodnight msgs w nct farm emojis heheeh

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared? lol ofc....

31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks. unfortunately im rly basic on socks, u wud most likely find me wearing black ankle socks or black ballet(?) socks nothing more nothing less.......

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends. a lot has happened usually during that time lol. duno which story to pick honestly hahahah. i think a memorable one might be when we were drinking n played games and we talked and talked and joked n nek min one by one we fell asleep in the same room hahah... im sure there are other stories tht might be more eventful but fr the life of me my memorys fuzzy rn lol

33: what’s your fave pastry? i love strawberry shortcakes! or mille crepes

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it? i kept a LOT hahah. prolly named a few, but nothing was too special. i think it rly reflected how i managed my relationships then, n evn yrs aftwds, like i ws always lonely n my instincts were to gain quantity cos deep down i cudnt trust ppl n cudnt get too committed lololol

35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often? i wish i was cos sometimes ppl wud make pretty colorful notes, but i usually just buy ones tht i wud use cos practicality.

36: which band’s sound would fit your mood right now? mmmmm is it cheating if i say nct cos they cover a range of genres lmao. but their ballads i guess yeah.

37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean? i mean i prefer to keep it clean, but its always really messy HAHAHA ;_;

38: tell us about your pet peeves! 1. someone rude 2. someone who doesnt know how to respect others’ boundaries 3. someone self-entitled n takes themselves 2 seriously

39: what color do you wear the most? black on black on black on black baby

40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what’s it’s story? does it have any meaning to you? an evangelion ring, its the black (lilith) moon with lcl gem in it, to me i guess symbolizes my struggle with human relations, n how eva as an anime illustrated tht n the fantasy of having everyone’s consciousness merged into one--n the fact that lilith in itself (in astrology) signifies the darker side of a human being? i guess n the fact that evn if u acknowledge ur darker side u cud still use it to further urself

41: what’s the last book you remember really, really loving? hmmmm i guess last was a self help book, unfuck your boundaries, helped me support my need to strengthen my boundaries

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it! little rogue :) its in a small alleyway, a little quaint shop, easy to miss... small potted plants, with an amaaazing matcha latte

43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with? siiigh a guy i was involved with lmfao i cut him off tho

44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything? hmmmmm good question i guess lately ive been very thankful tht i could feel comfortable taking my own time and space, n accepting the positive energy others wn give 2 me. being single really, really does help evn tho id feel lonely sometimes, bc the only weight i carry is the weight of my own soul n i wn learn how to nourish that

45: do you trust your instincts a lot? very i think

46: tell us the worst pun you can think of. i have a lot HAHAHA if u were a friend of mine ud prolly get tired of them. a genuinely bad one wud be haha youre so punny lmfao

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe? nothing rly lmao if theyre healthy n someone derives happiness frm it i wudnt want it to be banned

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today? probably not lol, i mean i think i retained similar fears since i ws a kid but now obviously my biggest fear(s) would be more...specific to me

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought? its the digital age baby spotify ftw (in all srsness i wish i collected vinyls tho hh)

50: what’s an odd thing you collect? i used to collect ramune bottles lmaoooo

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them? hmmmm nah lets not do this right now lol

52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far? LOL too many but i love shitpost quality memes tbh

53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them? pulp fiction. i actually loved it, i think i still do, its entertainment value is kickass, havent taken the time to dissect it in any other way

54: who’s the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face? oh man i think it ws the dude i ws seeing lmao fk him

55: what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point? a lot, n most of them im not proud of, cos some involves self harm

56: what are some things you find endearing in people? kindness n genuineness, someone’s courage in being vulnerable

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics? dont feel like it rn but everytime i do 10/10 will dramatically reenact the lyrics right to the guitar riffs

58: who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why? im definitely the wine (aunt) lmfaooo im already one tbh 

59: what’s your favorite myth? Eros + Psyche, Icarus and the sun

60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves? i love poetry hahah...cant think of any rn

61: what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received? id love any gift given 2 me as long as they wont harm me or anything lmao n i dont think ive evr given anything too stupid. well.. idk if this is stupid tho like i sent flowers thanking my ex for ‘helping me live’ well aft we’ve blocked each other off cos the end to the relo was js daaamn toxic lmao

62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind? nope

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be? music i do spotify n im pretty particular ab organizing my playlists i guess. my books im alright with as long as theyre just stacked properly no problem

64: what color is the sky where you are right now? prolly rly dark blue cos its 12 am

65: is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with? a lot tbh cos ive rly been focusing on stuff internally

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like? daisies, sunflowers, n baby breath here n there

67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel? somber i guess maybe a tad bit nostalgic?

68: what’s winter like where you live? heeella cold not cos of the temperature itself but the winds thooo, if it drizzles evn in the slightest it feels like needles piercing through ur bones literally

69: what are your favorite board games? i like the game of life, ummm cards against humanity?

70: have you ever used a ouija board? no n never will lol

71: what’s your favorite kind of tea? the fruity kinds

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it? yea def lol

73: what are some of your worst habits? disappearing from people when i feel strong emotions

74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns. they’re small but they’re so full of love, full of life, full of strength, and full of care for others, they’re the type of person who will seek their goals till the end despite obstacles and still be able to not lose their warm heart on the way. they put so much thought and care to every aspect of their life even when in the past they have been handed some bad things, and i adore them for that.

75: tell us about your pets! none :( wish i have a cat though

76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t? hahahhaah

77: pink or yellow lemonade? pink!

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub? neither sometimes i think theyre weird sometimes cute sometimes weirdly cute lmao

79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you? write up 24 things they love about me to stop me from hating myself

80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why? white. no but if i had to id say white anyways lol cos its a blank canvas

81: describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of. i dunno uhhhh her rounded eyes which seemed to at first glance, harbor plenty of wonder seemed to be weighted by many untold secrets, the traces of which could be found when she erupts into laughter where the wonder would manifest itself in the form of small stars in the dark of her eyes.

82: are/were you good in school? meh. i try

83: what’s some of your favorite album art? weirdly i like cigarette after sex’s one cos its so simple yet telling

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones? planning on getting an evangelion one, another heart one, a sunflower one, and prolly a ghibli related one

85: do you read comics? what are your faves? manga? naruto 4evr LOL

86: do you like concept albums? which ones? hmmm thinkin of dpr live’s IAOT

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives? lord of the rings, harry potter, one of ghibli movies lol

88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy? i think impressionism is very cool evn tho i dont do it myself

89: are you close to your parents? eeeeee

90: talk about your one of you favorite cities. Melbourne is a wonderful city where many things could coexist in one--happiness and sadness, camaraderie and loneliness, hot and cold, quiet and full of life, productive and relaxed, bursting with unfocused energy yet incredibly organized, and for many reasons it’s become one of my favorite cities, and definitely my favorite to live in.

91: where do you plan on traveling this year? no plans tbh lol maybe home?.......japan? heheheh nahhh

92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch? it depends lol mostly i guess drowns my pasta in cheese

93: what’s the hairstyle you wear the most? i always wear it down, either straight or wavy

94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday? a friend of mine

95: what are your plans for this weekend? stay in most likely, do stuff

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot? 100% procrastinate lmaoooo

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house? ISTG, jkjk INFP, leo sun aquarius moon cancer rising, ravenclaw

98: when’s the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it? im alws meh ab hiking tbh lmao 

99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them. Long Slow Distance - NCT 127, Four - Sleeping At Last, idontwannabeyouanymore - Billie Eilish, Stop This Train - John Mayer, Digital Lover - Crush

100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why? 5 years into the past so she’d stop focusing her life around anybody else but herself

[cjqdion]

term 8: mar. 19 (mon), 2018; 22:09

I have probably reached the point now of totally giving up my course ‘cos I am already typing this long story of me losing interest with my major, Math haha

When I was in elementary and highschool, I really loved Math. I excelled in it not in the way I was the best in class but enough for me to keep doing good in school. That was why I pursued a math degree for college. I thought that maybe this wasn’t a bad idea. Being stuck with math for four years may seem tolerable! (((da hek 15-yr old me lol)))

After three years I spent with college, I have always been in denial about my interest in my course. I would always defend it to every person who would tell me my course is just for the profession of teaching. Although I have nothing against with being a teacher, there is always a stigma around my life that I should get into the corporate world and earn well in that field.

I would always push myself extra hard in my studies and would always aim for being a dean’s lister since I have already tried it twice consecutively in college. Not until my third term of my stay came. There were already subjects being introduced to me that I could not grasp properly nor be able to visualize it. I barely survived it. It was just mostly me trying to pass. I did not bother about my grades anymore and all I could care about was to pass all my subjects and get out of college.

Then I failed one subject. It was a first from me. After retaking it and passed, I thought that maybe I can still pass my other subjects. All I have to do is just focus and study study. Then I had to repeat it to myself every term until it gets exhausting. Until recently, I failed two subjects last term. (uhh what a bummer :( lol) Basically this term I had to repeatedly tell to myself again, yes celine you can do this, just four more terms and you’ll be done with it. And ahhh I just couldn’t take it anymore :( I can’t believe I am just basically spending my years in college just trying to get by and not honing my interest that could be beneficial for my future. :( </3 I really really really used to love studying but now huhu I just can’t properly focus anymore since I already don’t get a lot of things since they are all interrelated from the lessons I didnt get when I was in sophomore till my present lessons today ;((((( <///3

HOWEVER.....

In my journey of trying to survive college as I struggle with my academics, I was able to find passion with other things I never thought I would such as cross-stitch, pottery, and art appreciation! :D Recently, I’ve also been trying to familiarize myself with ibis paint x and do some scribbles with it haha It was also a first for me to actually attend and learn from workshops and art fairs and book fairs and such! :D <3

Well, the things I can really be sure about right now is that:

1.) I cant shift out now cos it’s too late. I’m already taking up thesis and haha idk how to be able to handle to explain this to the relatives lol and bruh just three more terms (one yr) of handling this then bbye lol

2.) I found new love! Art is so beautiful and I can’t wait to explore more of it as time gets by! :D <3

3.) I still dont know what I have to do when I finish college. Let the wind take me to the right place pls! lol

As I make this post I actually have two quizzes and two papers due this week but look at how unbothered I am and right now I am here in Tumblr :D lol anyway, good night. still have to wake up at 4:30am tomr cos back to school again. :((( see i’m just dragging myself to school :(( <//3 lololol

19.3.18 | 22:09 | home