#anyway BRING THE INSANITY I want to see everyone’s unhinged comments

[sansebastinae]

Aye , guess that’s a fair punishment for Red Bull!

(not really. but ohh that wind tunnel time getting taken away is lmao)

[coeluvr]

You're so wonderfully devious. Your IF is so well written. I've played through it once several months ago, lost track of it, then found it again 🤗 but seriously, the complex emotions you pull out of me is what makes me keep coming back.

There's no time to not grieve for the MC. And your time jumps make it so no matter how much time has passed for MC, we don't get that relief. It makes me wonder if the MC feels that way all the time for the last 9 years if the grief we experience is just as intense. So I absolutely adore how you give MCs the ability to name a journal Alistair and to have a tattoo to keep them with you.

I don't know what to do with Rosea. I think the only way to hurt Luceris is by hurting the ones they love, Lancelot and Helios. But then this cycle of revenge continues and warps, and it's this massive spiders web because when you hurt Lancelot and Helios, then you hurt Farah, Vincent, and Hunter. It makes even more people want to put a stop to MC's machinations.

I know we're going to see it in writing, but the generational guilt on these kids [cause fuck they are basically still kids] heads is crushing.

The adults trying to alleviate guilt by saying "Mc is protected as consort" and has the "freedom to do what they want" is a poor consolation prize. They can't get rid of how they were complicit in MCs trauma.

Somehow, you have me litterally insane, tinfoil hat and all, do you play a kind MC so everyone can see how unhinged Luceris idea was? Because I'd love to play this game as quiet and kind MC, one who's forgive and try to move on, but when MCs twin died, I became just as crazy as Luceris. Now I have to be okay with the fact that I'm playing the long game of revenge and whatever that looks like.

Anyway, thank you for your work. It's amazing and I can't wait to see what happens next.

My toxic trait is I like being called evil or devious or anything insane. 🥰 Thank you for your kind words! 💗

Honestly, the time jumps do serve that purpose. Mainly because I think MC gets a little better each time jump but then something happens and it brings back what they felt that night in Vesphire.

For example, the time jump to meeting Fadiya is kind of supposed to be like "well at least someone wants to be friends with our baby" and that feeling is kind of hopeful, at least to me. With the 1st short story, I wanted to cement that feeling since it's like "world against MC but this little kid is here!!" and again it's hopeful. Chapter 2 is softer too with Fadiya, there isn't much angst until the very end where it's like "ah right, shit still sucks." and a part of the healing that the player might have felt just dies lol.

Chapter 3 is kind of different but technically MC is doing "better" or well coping better so there has been some progress on their part albeit it can be unhealthy.

I've gotten the "Oh this is kinda rushed" comment a few times but I don't think I could've taken these first few chapters more slowly since it is supposed to be kind of like a blur to MC. In my head, chapter 3 is when things are more slow for them but now they're leaving on a trip so...

I think revenge (that isn't like "get power throw him into jail") will always come with the loss of people. The only reason Luceris didn't lose people is because he didn't really have anyone to lose except for Lancelot and we all know how that's going. (Ikram doesn't count, if she refused he could just get another military general and been like okay. Don't be friends with your boss people. /j)

A Luceris that had Farah wouldn't have done that ever because she would have left him so yeah! It's normal to be stuck between what to do when you have people you care about who actually have somewhat of a normal moral compass.

Easiest way is to simply not have anyone (unless they're 100% in love with you and would throw away all their morals just for you ofc) and well maybe I can help with that! 🤭

The adults are insane and the kids are burdened with the problems that their parents are to blame for. I love the whole "burdened by the sins of your parents" trope. ✨️

God this got a bit too long lmao 😭 it was fun discussing some of the points. 🤝

[shepherds-of-haven]

No thoughts, just the Shepherds playing monopoly

I could have sworn I answered this before, but apparently not! Get ready for some chaos...

Blade: he is peak... him when playing Monopoly, because he keeps insisting on playing it like a war game and waging guerilla tactics against his competitors in order to bankrupt their “forces” and claim their land as his own. No one knows if he’s doing it out of malicious compliance from being forced to play, or if he’s sincerely, earnestly unable to play a game without making it about battle and violence. Anyway, he won one time and was silently insufferable about it--nothing is more irritating than the Commander’s stoic face looking just slightly smug without him saying anything--so no one wants to play with him anymore, which suits him just fine because then he can stay a champion without having to constantly defend his title. He also has fairly bad luck when it comes to gambling, so the dice seem to conspire to screw him over quite a lot. 

Trouble: he gets excited and jubilant to play every time, but hits a breaking point when the other players start playing “dirty” and not “playing fair”--IE using tactics and techniques that he can’t keep up with or manipulating him. Then it’s the time for Rage and shouting and violence and indignation. He insists on keeping a “judge” or referee around whenever they play so the referee can comment on whether or not certain moves are fair and allowed, but he always ends up bullying the ref and yelling at them, too, leading once to tears on Shery’s part, which led to Briony and Ayla getting into an all-out brawl with him. He won that fight, but has never won a single game of Monopoly. Still, his dogged determination to keep playing never wavers. More on his violence in the other entries.

Tallys: she played with them one time before realizing how unhinged they all were. Here’s part of her journal entry for that day: Never before had I contemplated what a thread-thin line it is that separates us from the demons. Each of us possesses the power to bring an entire city to its knees, and it would not take very much to tip us over that precipice. Even a mere game is enough to tempt us to the path of darkness. Pride cometh before a fall, and I fear we are all balancing precariously on the edge of a knife.

Long story short: she has the smarts to win, but it’s just not worth it.

Shery: she is actually very competent at Monopoly and is good enough strategically to keep up with Red, Lavinet, and Riel, sometimes showing an unpredictable streak of merciless logic. However, she tends to feel bad about rubbing things in or making others feel bad, so she sometimes quietly makes wrong moves and mistakes towards the end of the game. Riel called her out on it once, and she admitted she likes commiserating with everyone and having fun with them instead of winning, because everyone loathes the victor lol. But she could destroy at Monopoly if she wanted to! She puts on a pot of calming tea whenever they decide to play, but assures everyone it’s caffeinated lol. Regardless, it never helps...

Riel: he is not allowed to play with them. He is horrible with Monopoly. But not in that he’s bad... in that he’s way too good. And competitive. And ruthless. And the whole “he can think twelve steps ahead of everyone else” intelligence and analytical skill is combined with an insufferably condescending attitude (not even really on purpose... that’s just how he is). Imagine having an opponent who absolutely destroys you every time you play with him-- sometimes yawning while you play, sometimes sighing and explaining to you what exact moves you could have made to actually put up a fight against him or even have a chance of winning, and exactly what you did to go wrong. Imagine buying a Monopoly property and glancing across the table at Riel, who looks like:

One time Trouble physically reached across the table, grabbed him by the shirtfront, and dragged him across the board game to throttle him. The worst part about it was that, when it upset the game pieces and overturned the board, Riel commented that he had memorized every piece position and each player's money exactly, so there was no need to stop the game. Another time, Ayla actually stood and gave him a black eye for buying Reading Railroad when she had been saving up for it (well, it was really when he answered, “I know.”). This violence shocked Riel--who had never really been physically hurt by another person before--so deeply that he didn’t speak for the rest of the game. However, he still won, even with only one good eye. 

After that, it was decided that Riel can only play the game through a proxy, and to cap him further, that person has to make half of the decisions while Riel is allowed to suggest the other half, with no discussion between the two of them. Unfortunately for Riel, the only person who would want to be his proxy turned out to be Caine, whose blithe spiritual resilience and enjoyment of winning allowed him to withstand Riel’s controlling demeanor. However, he also drives Riel insane because he’s 12 and makes the unpredictable moves of a 12-year-old boy. 

Chase: Truth be told, he never learned how to play Monopoly or what the point of the game is, because any time anyone tries to explain game rules to him longer than five seconds, his eyes glaze over, or he even get bored and wanders off. Now he plays only to amuse himself by trolling the others; his favorite past time is to replace other players’ pieces with stupid things and see how long it takes for them to notice. The thimble becomes a button, the dog becomes a nut, and etc. Interestingly, he has extremely good luck, and whether by cheating or fortune, he can make the dice roll to any number he wants. Briony, Lavinet, and Red regularly bribe him to help them out with important rolls; thus, another rule has been instated that he can only roll another player’s dice once per game. Typically, they bribe him with more stuff to replace their game pieces with.

Red: he has a strategic mind to rival Riel’s, but he lacks the desire to crush his enemy under his bootheel in order to win at all costs. He tries to make it light-hearted and good, wholesome fun, but it never really goes that way. Still, somehow things work in his favor anyway, and he can cheerfully go, “Oh, I can buy Park Place!” as if just realizing it, an attitude which drives most others crazy. After Riel, he is technically in second place for most games won; he would be tied with Shery if she actually won the games she was in the position to without pretending to lose. However, everyone else being so competitive has made him reluctant to play, so typically he can only be persuaded to if everyone is extra nice to him and promises not to scream to the gods for the others to drop dead on the spot. 

Ayla: you might think Trouble is the likeliest to flip over the game board/table, but it’s actually Ayla. She gets easily confused and irritated, bending over the pieces and scratching her head furiously like “wtf is going on??” This makes her angrier, and when Riel starts to gloat, she’s lunging across the table and having to be held back by Briony or Blade; one time she even tried to bite him. She doesn’t even want to play nowadays, but can’t stand to be left out. When she's not so angry the room is spinning, she does alright, and generally can do second or third-best if Riel or Lavinet are not involved (for some reason she does better against Red or Shery).

Halek: are you joking? you think he would play an hours-long game with those maniacs? as soon as he hears the rattle of the game board, he dissipates into the air like smoke

Briony: Briony’s got the spirit of things, but she’s not quite cut out for Monopoly. She keeps trying to bend the rules to work on teams with other people, proposing combining their finances and working together to win the game, like “yay okay let’s be allies ❤!!!” This works out in her favor like 50% of the time; sometimes someone like Red or Shery agrees, even though that’s not really how you play, and they might win; sometimes she gets absolutely burned, notably once by Lavinet, because her partner will then betray her in some way. This drives her to hysterical tears, but otherwise, she can generally handle losing with a smile and a desire to keep the peace. However, she can get riled up when the others get riled up, like “okay Trouble stop yelling and settle down, you’re going to knock over Shery’s tea...” *Trouble knocks over Shery’s tea* *Briony tackles him* “I SAID SETTLE DOWN!”

Lavinet: Behind Riel, Red, and Shery, she’s the best at the game, since Monopoly is fairly similar to the work she does for the fiefdom. She’s also the best at manipulating the others and occasionally even flirting her way to Pennsylvania Ave. She doesn’t care about winning as much as the others--she is very good at dismissing any loss as “just a game” or “it’s not that important, darling”--but is a smug winner just like the rest of them, unleashing her ojou-sama laugh at the moment of her impending victory. Trouble once described that laugh as “the shrieking of a thousand harpies”. Other than that, though, she’s a fairly normal player, though she barely bats an eye at the violent extremes everyone else takes it to. 

[nebraska-is-a-myth]

Who lives and who dies - Part 11

Angst, nothing but angst here, sorry folks but no soft hugs today. Slight trigger warning for self sacrificing thoughts and lots of mentions of death so make sure you take care of yourself when reading. Slight title changes to the previous chapter might be made because this chapter, the previous chapter, and the next chapter are going to be sort of a 3 parter. Also all relationships in this are strictly platonic unless I specify otherwise. Comments and asks are always welcome :)

Masterlist 

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“Four, Five, Six.”

Dream doesn't want this. He can't kill Tommy, he can't. Despite the young boy's protests, Tommy’s only a child, he’s got his whole life ahead of him. He’s supposed to grow up and go to college and have a good fucking life away from all of this violence and chaos. He’s supposed to have a family and a home and find somewhere where he feels like he belongs, because god knows Dream wants those things. He wants to have a life that isn't threatened by someone elses greed or power hungry revenge plots. He wants to have a home for him and his cat where he can watch movies and grow plants and not have to worry about being shot in his sleep. He wants friends that care more about his well being than what bank they're going to rob next. He wants to go back to before any of this ever happened, when sapnap was kinder and didn’t carry a gun with him every time he left the apartment, when George and him would sit up on the roof until 3am stargazing and talking about George's dream to become a streamer. But now he feels like those people he knew are gone, replaced with violent and destructive tyrants that he can't even recognise.

Dream wants to turn around and give Tommy the biggest hug, he wants to comfort his friend brother and just let Sapnap and George rip him to shreds with their bullets and words. He wants to choose Tommy, he wants to punch George in the face and scream at him for hurting someone he considered family.

But wasn't George his family at some point?

It feels like a lifetime ago, but he knows that they are supposed to be close, closer than they have been in months. The stress and pressure forced a divide between all three of them, with dream on one side and George and sapnap on the other. They haven't had a proper conversation that didn't end in a fight in weeks, let alone actually be nice to one another. Dream can barely remember the last time any of them said they loved one another.

No, that's a lie.

Dream remembers the night perfectly, he thinks about it every time he storms off from another one of his and Georges fights. All three of them were together, sat in a comfortable silence with bellies full of fast food and blankets draped lazily over themselves. Dream is sat in the middle of the other two boys after a super intense pillow fight that Dream had been forced to put a stop to. Sapnap has his feet in Dreams lap, his head is rolled back and every now and again little snores escape from his mouth. George jokes about how much of a child Sapnap is and it makes Dream chuckle. They sit in silence for a while, just letting the movie George chose entertain them for a while. George's head sets itself on Dreams shoulder and Dream shuffles so he can lean into George more. 

“I’m tired.”

Dream laughs and tugs the blanket he and George are sharing further up their body's.

“Go to sleep then stupid.”

George minorly attacks Dream for the comment, but it’s a very lazy attempt.

“Don't wanna.”

“Go to sleep George.”

“Fiiiiiiiiine, goodnight Dream, Love you”

“Love you two moron, g’night.”

George moves slightly so he can get more comfortable before raising his voice slightly.

“Love you sapnap.”

Sapnap gives a small snore in response and the two boys fall into a hushed fit of laughter.

But as Dream looks at his best friend ( Can he even call him that anymore ) he doesn't even know who he’s looking at anymore. Sure maybe Sapnap was always a bit unhinged, a bit too trigger happy, but when everything's said and done, when everyone goes home and tries to pretend that life is normal for a short while, Sapnap takes off the mask ( Quite literally ) and Dream can see that he’s still the same Sapnap underneath it all. But as he looks at George, he can only see his own reflection in the tainted glass of his goggles. Maybe this is God mocking him for what his friend has become. Maybe this is his fault, his fault he dragged George into his own twisted fantasies. Who was he to catapult an innocent person into this life, George had barely even learnt how to shoot a gun on their first heist. He wishes he had just let George stick to hacking, there was no need to bring him into the limelight. He could have stopped this. He could have stopped George from becoming this monster. He could have

Fuck

Dream considers what would happen if he just let Tommy kill him. Sure he would be dead, but other than that was there really a downside? It sounds so morbid when he thinks about it, in any other circumstance maybe he would be worried about his self sacrificing behavior, but maybe this was just what he had to do. If Tommy shot him and he died, then yeah Tommy would be devastated, he would be sad for a while but at least he would be safe. The boy would finally have a home, somewhere he could be safe. He thinks he trusts Wilbur enough to take care of Tommy, he’s done okay so far in Dreams books anyway. Who knows, maybe one day Techno would return and put a stop to all of this nonsense, he would scoop Tommy up and take him away from all this, away from this wretched place. 

But he knows that’s just a fantasy. He doubts George would just willingly give the l’manburgians the eastside, if he thought George would have been that kind then Dream would have stepped down a long time ago.

Fuck why is this so hard

He should let Tommy kill him. It’s the easiest option, he can't kill Tommy, he doesn't want to. Nothing will be fixed if the kid is dead. So why is he hesitating? Maybe it’s because he knows that no matter what he does, Tommy will be hurt. If Dream dies George will take over and make everybody's lives a living hell, Tommy will most likely be killed anyway and all of his friends will either follow down the same path or be run out of their homes with a target on all of their heads. Maybe, if he...

Shit

Maybe if he did kill Tommy, he could make it up to the kid some way. He could make sure his friends are taken care of, make sure George doesn't go anywhere near them, give them independence. He could make sure Tubbo grows up to be smart and make something of himself, if he wanted to go to college then Dream could fund it, make sure he went to the best school, or whichever one Tubbo liked best. He could help Wilbur with his music career, Tommy said he had always wanted to become a musician, so maybe he could rent out one of those fancy recording studios people like The Beatles had. He could help Fundy when he gets into trouble coding and help Eret set up an lgbt youth center or something like that. He could bring Tommy flowers every other day, and then every weekend if he really couldn't make it. Maybe he could get a bouquet of some of those wildflowers he said were pretty when they went out adventuring that one time. 

What the hell is he talking about

This is insane

He needs to focus

Come on dream, focus

“Seven, eight, nine.”

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It’s almost sunset and Tommy is barely thirteen. He hasn't had a warm meal in weeks, not that anybody else knows that, but the glowing light on his face makes him feel full. It’s nice being away from the city like this, just looking out across fields of wildflowers and long grass that makes his nose itch. Nobody knows he’s out here, but then again is there really anyone out there to care? Maybe he’s just destined to be alone, to roam through places like this and drift off into the wilderness never to be seen again. If every moment was like this one then maybe it wouldn't be so bad, if it were then at least he wouldn't be so pale. 

He sits there for a while, just letting the light blanket his body. It's...calming. Tommy misses this. What he misses exactly he’s not sure of, but the feeling of being embraced makes him nostalgic, and it hits him with a wave of overwhelming sadness. The saying ‘Tommyinnit doesn't cry’ is rarely actually the truth. He misses being around people, actual people that don't want to try and mug him or steal his spot in the alley with the least rats. Sure maybe he speaks to Technoblade every now and again, but it's not like the anarchist actually cares about him. Tommy only speaks to Techno when he wants something from him, like if he needs the blond to squeeze into small spaces or spray paint some symbols on a corporate building. Tommy always gets a cut of whatever profits they make that day and then he gets to sleep in a warm bed at the shitty motel for a day or two. It’s fine though, like he said, maybe he’s just destined to be alone. He basks in the light for a little while longer, until suddenly theirs a voice behind him

“It’s late.”

Shit, shit, shit.

Tommy quickly wipes away his tears and hunches over on himself.

“Uh yeah um, I guess I lost track of time.”

“Do you even know what time it is?”

“Uh yeah it's like seven ish.”

“Nine.”

Nine! Shit, all the god spots by the fast food place are bound to be taken by now.

“Shouldn't you be getting home.”

Home, what even is home anymore. The alleyway sure doesn't feel like home. But what else has he got. Phil probably hates him by now, he took that home for granted. None of the other foster families before that had even come close to becoming a home, and he can barely remember what life with his parents was like. So what is home?

“Tommy.”

“Oh uh, yeah sorry Technoblade. I’ll just be going now.”

Tommy gets up to leave but Techno grabs his arm firmly and holds him in place.

“About today.”

He's going to get shouted at, he can feel it. It was his fault they almost got caught, he just couldn't shoot that man. He’d never been in the action directly before, only ever doing menial tasks from the sidelines. But today Techno wanted help in the field and who was he to say no to the blade. It was his fault, he couldn't kill someone and now Techno is going to abandon him and he’s going to starve to death in the shittiest fucking alleyway know to man.

“It's okay if you're not ready.”

“What?”

“It's okay if you're not ready to kill people yet.”

“I- It is?”

“It’s okay to not want to kill people Tommy, but sometimes you don't always have that choice. When the moment comes, and it will come one day, you have to decide in that moment who lives and who dies, you or them."

"W-what if I don't want to die."

"Then make sure the other person does."

Tommy waits for a while, and lets a breath escape from his lips. Maybe there's still time to find a good spot for tonight, if he leave now he can-

“Now come on, I’m making pasta.”

Technoblade turns to leave and Tommy just stands in place, his mouth agape and eyes wide.

“Hurry up child before I change my mind.”

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Tommy gets a warm meal and comfy bed that night, and the night after that, and the night after that, and every night leading up to his sixteenth birthday before there's no one left to cook him pasta or pay rent. Before he meets the next criminal willing to give him a home and keep him safe, before he finds friends and a family and a home. Then someone else cooks him pasta and keeps him company, until he starts a war and gets people killed and all of a sudden Tommy realises that the moment Technoblade had warned him of was coming to a head. 

He has to decide in this moment who lives and who dies, him or dream

And he has to do it now.

“Ten paces, Fire!”

[bnha-mha-imagines]

Okay, get this: a new lov member who’s really awkward and shy. Everyone thinks she’s just a normal gal but it turns out she’s absolutely out of her mind? /sigh/ I don’t even know anymore 😔 rip. I’m so bad at requesting it should be my new party trick. Anyways, I hope you have a good day and I love your writing!!

Ahh thank you! :) I’m not sure if you wanted this to be cute or disturbing so I went with the latter because nothing I’ve posted so far is dark themed (all my stuff is like, fluff haha)! :0 Let’s get some well rounded writing up in here! 

New LOV member who’s secretly insane

Warnings: DARK THEMES that include but are not limited to: Blood, dead animals, disturbing images, cannibalism, death, hearing voices, sadism/masochism, violence, mentions of self-harm etc. etc. You get the picture. 

^^^Don’t read if you’re sensitive to similar topics. I went ham on this, yall. 

Disclaimer: The reader depicted in this is chronically insane and is an extreme case. This is in no way a depiction of a person with a mental disorder. I don’t want to spread any misinformation, most people with mental disorders are lovely people and are not crazy/dangerous in anyway

Under the cut vvv

Tomura Shigaraki:

Look, he wasn’t a fan of the whole awkward-shy act, but hey, you were pretty hot and you had a quirk that the League definitely needed

So he let you in, figuring he’d just need to have that timid attitude of yours whipped out of you

But OH. It didn’t take long for him to realize you were completely bonkers. 

Dabi was giving you shit like he did everyone, and all it took was a poor comment on his part for your usually pleasant expression to contort into one of malice and...joy? The way your face darkened and your eyes swirled with an unhinged gleam… 

Maybe you’d be more interesting than he initially thought~ plus, seeing you threaten Dabi was definitely some brownie points in Tomura’s book

At times it gets frustrating because you can get out of hand, and he honestly couldn’t even handle the League WITHOUT another crazy added in the mix

But you were powerful and an important addition to the team, so you were stuck with this sorry lot whether you liked it or not

Kurogiri:

He was a little surprised, but pleasantly so, when Tomura recruited you for the League. You were actually...rather normal compared to the rest of the bunch, but he was far from complaining!

You were also modest and well-mannered, and Kurogiri especially admired that. The rest of the League was full of squabbling hotheads, so you were a breath of fresh air!

At the bar, he’d talk a lot with you seeing as you were one of the calmer villains, but overtime he noticed that certain comments would raise a few red flags. 

One day you bring in the mangled body of a cat and...oh. 

The way you casually set it on the bar counter and grin at Kurogiri happily while you ask for a kiddy cocktail… all the while your hands were still soaked in its blood.

Tomura’s decision made a bit more sense now. You were completely off your rocker! He treats you pretty much the same as before, but is usually the one who has to reel you in when you start to show your crazy too much. 

Dabi:

When you first joined the League, he couldn’t believe it. Was Tomura fucking stupid? How could a shy, pretty thing like you possibly fit in with the baddest villain organization?

Needless to say, he was kind of an asshole to you. He’d make rude comments, blatantly say you didn’t belong here, condescendingly give you names like “princess” 

For the most part you would bear it all with a grin, and though he didn’t exactly understand you reaction, he would scoff and roll his eyes. “Weirdo”

One day he happens to strike a particularly strong chord with you, and suddenly you’ve shoved him against a wall, hands wrapped around his throat

You choking him wasn’t what off put him. It was the demented look in your eyes and the lopsided grin overwhelming your face. You were practically begging him to insult you again.

“It feels soooo good when you call me names!” you giggle, fingers squeezing into his neck. “Maybe you can choke me next?!” Your eyes were excited at the sadistic thought. 

He shoves you off rather easily after he gets over his initial surprise, rubbing his neck. “Crazy bitch…”

The fact that he didn’t ignite your crazy ass on the spot means you’d gained his respect, if in the slightest. Clearly you’re a better fit to be a villain than he thought. He still picks on you, but significantly less.

Himiko Toga:

She was excited to have another girl! She flocked straight to you and grabbed your sleeve right away!

“Aiiya! You’re so cute, look at you!” She poked your cheeks and you got a little flustered under the attention. She thinks you’re so shy and adorable!!!!

She makes it her mission to become your bestest best friend! But she can’t help but get a little excited from time to time.

“(Y/n), you’re too cute! Please, can I cut you up!? Just a few slices here and there! You’d look ten times cuter if I do!” And she’s grinning.

Her grin completely falters, however, when you agree. “W-What?” she didn’t expect it at all! She was used to getting brushed off.

But no...the crazed look in your eye at the mention of spilled blood… you were practically dripping with insanity. 

Kurogiri stopped the both of you before you both had the chance to completely slice each other up, but from that moment on your were pretty much conjoined at the hip.

Crazy cuties flock together

Spinner:

When a cute, shy thing like yourself joined the League, he was a total flustered mess! You were absolutely adorable!

Like Kurogiri, you were a breath of fresh air, a nice change of pace to the usually colorful bunch that he got to hang around with.

You were nice to him, and he always gets embarrassed when you compliment him! So naturally he assumes that you’re the sweetheart of the bunch! 

You’re talking, and finally Spinner outright asks you, “How’d you even get roped into villainy?” because it blows his mind such a normie like you are in the League

And, very casually and chipper, you describe how you murdered your family in cold blood. They hadn’t even done anything to upset you. You just wanted to. 

“O-Oh.” He honestly didn’t know what to say...but he didn’t really get a chance to speak as you suddenly pull a necklace out from under your shirt. It was a strange looking thing, a shriveled black lump on a string. 

“Look! I even carry a piece of them around with me!” His eyes widen, and you just giggle and tuck the petrified piece of corpse jewelry back into your shirt. 

Twice:

Needless to say, Twice had some mixed feelings about you when you first joined the League.

“What the hell is such a prude bitch doing in the League?” “Aww how cute! Finally a fresh face! Happy to meet you!” 

He’s honestly probably the first to realize you’re absolutely batshit because he’s always half doubting your sincerity

Let’s just say he isn’t surprised when you’re on a mission and you start gnawing and eating at a fresh corpse on the ground

“Wow, that’s fucking bad ass” “Ew!!! That’s disgusting, what the fuck!” 

And hearing his voices go back and forth, you just look up, blood smeared across your face, a strange gleam in your eye and you grin!

“Hahaha! Twice, you always say the funniest things!!!”

After the mission he tries to avoid you as much as he can. Though your quirk and tenacity was something the League definitely benefited from, that didn’t mean he wanted to be anywhere near you after the shit he saw that night

You were fucking wild

Mr. Compress

After Shigaraki let you into the League, he was pretty interested in you. You seemed pretty average and you acted like a timid civilian, so what kind of quirk did you have? Surely something must have caught Tomura’s eye that he wasn’t seeing.

So he, being the man of charisma and mystery that he was, made it his secret motive to find out what you were hiding. 

He took it upon himself to show you around the hideout as your own personal guide. Not that you were complaining! Compress is so flashy and entertaining that you were actually enjoying your time with him.

Not gonna lie, he was acting a little too charming and over-confident with you, trying to get you to slip up and spill a secret

And spill you did! Though not intentionally. It sort of all happened at once. Compress was moving ahead of you and all of a sudden he was thrown back against the wall.

He hits it with a grunt and slides down to the floor, looking up at you with a stunned expression. What the fuck did he do to merit that?!

But you weren’t even looking at him. No, you were whispering under your breath, staring at the ceiling and grinning like a madman. 

“You’re right! That was fun!” you spoke to the empty room, pausing a moment before letting out a loud, crazy laugh. “You always were good at jokes!” 

Slowly he rose and moved away from the room where you stood conversing with your imaginary voices. 

Telekinesis was a pretty powerful quirk! Though it seemed your perks also came with some hefty flaws… very interesting!

Magne: 

Magne was so excited to have another girl in the League! She loved Toga, of course, but at times Magne found her to be a bit...much 

So when you first arrived, seemingly normal, she was so ecstatic! She wanted to do all sorts of girl things with you that she couldn’t really do often in the boy-dominated League

You were so cute and timid, she couldn’t help but want to have a girl’s sleepover with you and Toga!

Your true colors started to show, however, during the middle of a truth or dare game. Magne had asked you what your favorite crime to commit was, expecting something calmer like robbery or identity theft 

Color her surprised when your face contorts into the craziest, most terrifying look as you narrate a violent murder and proceed to grab a pillow and rip it to shreds with your hands as a ‘demonstration’. 

Cute AND violently psycho. She can roll with that.

[funnythingshere0-blog]

Adam Driver 'SNL' Sketches Ranked Worst to First: Matt Damon's Brett Kavanaugh, Pete Davidson's Summer

New Post has been published on https://funnythingshere.xyz/adam-driver-snl-sketches-ranked-worst-to-first-matt-damons-brett-kavanaugh-pete-davidsons-summer/

Adam Driver 'SNL' Sketches Ranked Worst to First: Matt Damon's Brett Kavanaugh, Pete Davidson's Summer

Adam Driver may have been the host of this premiere, but it kind of felt like musical guest Kanye West got way more attention. Not only did he get his usual two musical spots during the show, he even took over the stage for a third performance at the end.

Meanwhile, Driver really only got a few chances to shine throughout the night. He was in a lot of the sketches, but he was subdued in most of them. His “Career Day” appearance was easily his most over-the-top and it showed how much he’s willing to throw himself into these characters. It was both ridiculous and hilarious.

Kanye was joined by Lil Pump for “I Love It,” but they skipped the boxy suits for bottled water costumes instead. If you thought this song barely worked as a music video, Kanye was basically saying, ‘Here hold my water’ with this performance. It worked much better when he premiered new song “We Got Love” with Teyana Taylor jumping all around the stage. They sounded stronger and the song held together much better.

For a season premiere, many of the sketches felt half-baked, as if they hadn’t quite come together fully, which is crazy. Last season, weeks that allowed this group more than one week to come up with the show were some of their strongest outings, but that just wasn’t the case here. We did enjoy Pete Davidson talking about what he did over the summer.

And we got some sneak peeks into the camaraderie of the cast behind the scenes, which is always fun. They also introduced new featured player Ego Nwodim, but she did virtually nothing this week. We’ll keep an eye on her to see how she grows throughout the season and hopefully finds her voice.

As usual, we’re ranking all the sketches from worst to first, including the Cold Open and the regular “Weekend Update” segments. We’ll skip the musical guests, because they’re not usually funny – unless Ashlee Simpson shows up. We wrap up with a look at the cast-member who had the strongest week.

MONOLOGUE – Adam Driver

[embedded content]

“One huge spoiler about ‘Star Wars’–” Adam Driver said, before getting interrupted by Beck Bennett, who wanted to talk about his summer. That was essentially the thrust of his monologue, the entire cast wanting to gab about their summer and Adam really hating small talk.He suffered through Kenan Thompson and Aidy Bryant, but when Pete Davidson came out, Pete wasn’t interested in sharing. “No, you’re the one person who’s summer I really want to hear about,” Adam said. But that was the end. It wasn’t hugely hilarious, but it was kind of fun watching Adam sear burning hatred into Kenan, who did his classic “Kenan face” in response.

Vermont

[embedded content]

Beck Bennett proposes white people leave and form their own nation, but Adam Driver says there already is a place like that: Vermont. And then the whole sketch just described “white paradise” and how much it looked like Vermont. It never got to be too much or too funny or too silly or even a little over-the-top. It was just white supremacists thinking Vermont sounds really nice. We can’t imagine Vermont loving the sketch, but otherwise it was disappointingly bland.

Fortnite

[embedded content]

We suppose it was inevitable considering how insanely popular it is, but “SNL” went all in on this “Fortnite” sketch. They had Kyle Mooney, Pete Davidson and Adam Driver as players, but we didn’t expect them to bring the characters to life, too, with Mikey Day as Driver’s character, and Chris Redd and Heidi Gardner rounding out the digital cast. Adam played a middle-aged father who’d never played the game before, so that was it. Mikey mimicked the ridiculous things Adam was making him do, while the other guys got irritated until they all died. But at that point, it was a mercy killing. The sketch could have been funny or had a fun twist, but it had that one visual joke and nothing else.

Rad Times at Frat U

[embedded content]

So that was a weird one. A pre-taped sketch of an 80s frat party with constant freezes to drop notes on the screen about what happened to the people after; none of it good. From the innocent, like a guy who was excited to see girls now being married to a man, to the more serious — though never going so far as assault beyond a forced kiss. We thought the sketch was going somewhere with all of this, but it never really did. Clearly a reference to Kavanaugh’s partying days, but it didn’t skate the edge to drive home any sort of point.

Pete Davidson’s Shadow

[embedded content]

If it wasn’t intentional that announcer Darrell Hammond didn’t even say Kyle Mooney’s name during the opening credits, it fed perfectly into this early-show sketch about his insecurities. After Pete Davidson got engaged to Ariana Grande, Kyle Mooney realized he might never get the recognition he so desperately craves on the show in one of his pre-taped introspective videos. These are always weird and funny and awkward, but it’s where we got the sordid saga of his long romance with Leslie Jones, too, so we’re here for it. This time, he decided to solve his invisibility problem by becoming Pete, complete with blonde hair and slacker attitude. But rather than get a pop star to date, he brought out the real Wendy Williams as his girlfriend, complete with a pig. We also got an inside look at how “SNL” handles internal problems, and it is medieval and not pretty.

Weekend Update

[embedded content]

“If you’re drinking a bunch and you keep a calendar, it’s probably to help piece together what’s happening in your life,” Colin Jost said, as he and Michael Che went in on Kavanaugh’s blustery and angry hearing responses, though we don’t think Michael’s “might be” argument quite holds water.

[embedded content]

They saved a few moments to get into some of the other terrifying news of the summer, like that new and absolutely horrifying mascot for the Philadelphia Flyers. Who approved this monstrosity?

[embedded content]

Kate McKinnon then dropped by as Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg to comment and fire off some Gins-burns at everyone from Kavanaugh to Republican Senator Jeff Flake, who pushed for an FBI investigation to, as she sees it, protect his ass before he votes yes anyway.

[embedded content]

Out of nowhere, Leslie Jones interrupted as Serena Williams, despite the bit being cut. This kind of banter always helps to bring us deeper into the world of “SNL,” helping us connect to the cast-members behind the characters, and we are here for them. Plus, she did look great.

[embedded content]

Finally, and we all knew it was coming, Pete Davidson dropped by to finally answer the question Adam Driver wanted in the “Cold Open.” How did he spend his summer vacation? Well, we all know the details, but he said he hates all the attention. “It’s Malcolm X, Martin Luther King Jr. and Pete Davidson. All people who’ve gotten death threats,” he said. When asked about the prenup situation, Pete said he wanted one. “God forbid we break up and she takes half my sneakers.” He then joked he swapped her birth control for Tic-Tacs. “I believe in us and all,” he said. “I just want to make sure she cant go anywhere.”

COLD OPEN – Kavanaugh Hearing

[embedded content]

With no sign of Alec Baldwin’s Trump, we instead got a fresh and energetic exploration of the Kavanaugh hearing, with Matt Damon absolutely killing it as the Supreme Court nominee. “”I’m gonna start at an 11 and I’m gonna take it to a 15 real quick!” he shouted, setting the stage for alternating anger and tears as he cited Kathy Griffin and Ronan “Sinatra” as part of the left-wing conspiracy against him. The Senators were played by a who’s who of the cast (including Rachel Dratch), with Kate McKinnon coming unhinged as Sen. Lindsey Graham, though we’re not sure she has a completely successful take on him yet. It went a little long, but every time Damon was glowering on-screen, we realized we could take just a little bit more. If Kavanaugh is going to stay in the news cycle, here’s hoping Matt is game to keep playing him.

Career Day

[embedded content]

Pete Davidson’s 82-year-old father, played by Adam Driver, brings the fire as an oil baron who crushes his enemy and grinds their bones into the dirt. Turns out the other kids think he’s a lot cooler than either Pete or the teacher (Aidy Bryant). This was absolutely bizarre, but Adam was so committed to his ridiculous, screaming character that we found ourselves as unable to hold it together as Pete and some of the other students. This recurring sketch has always been hit or miss, but when your “parent” character is this ridiculous and played this well, it’s always going to work.

Coffee Taste Test

[embedded content]

We’ve seen this before, where Mikey Day surprises taste-test participants with a product that isn’t nearly as fancy as they think. This time, it was Burger King coffee, and this time it was Adam Driver and Cecily Strong who got to lose their s–t over it. “You fed my wife this garbage, this burger juice?” Adam shouted incensed, while Cecily kept insisting hers must be the fancy coffee. We’re not sure why these are always funny, but it’s how worked up one couple always gets over being fooled, and Cecily was hilariously clueless throughout.

PLAYER OF THE WEEK

Pete Davidson may have been the most anticipated cast-member in this premiere, if just to hear him make jokes about Ariana Grande, and he did not disappoint, but he didn’t really shine beyond his “Weeked Update” appearance. Remarkably, no single cast-member stepped up in a huge way in this very balanced episode.

So we’re going to give it to the cast-member who sold their spotlight sketch the strongest, which narrows it down to Kyle Mooney and Cecily Strong, with the edge going to Cecily for her ridiculously clueless coffee taster. Yes, we know Kate McKinnon gave us Ruth Bader Ginsburg and Lindsey Graham, but we didn’t love her Graham as much as other characters she’s done.

“Saturday Night Live” continues next week with host Awkwafina and musical guest Travis Scott, Saturday at 11:35 p.m. et on NBC.

Got a story or a tip for us? Email TooFab editors at tips@toofab.com.

View Photos Getty ‘The Walking Dead’ Cast Looked Killer at Season 9 Premiere

Source: http://toofab.com/2018/09/30/adam-driver-snl-sketches-ranked-worst-to-first-matt-damons-brett-kavanaugh-pete-davidsons-summer/

[recentnews18-blog]

New Post has been published on https://shovelnews.com/adam-driver-snl-sketches-ranked-worst-to-first-matt-damons-brett-kavanaugh-pete-davidsons-summer/

Adam Driver 'SNL' Sketches Ranked Worst to First: Matt Damon's Brett Kavanaugh, Pete Davidson's Summer

Adam Driver may have been the host of this premiere, but it kind of felt like musical guest Kanye West got way more attention. Not only did he get his usual two musical spots during the show, he even took over the stage for a third performance at the end.

Meanwhile, Driver really only got a few chances to shine throughout the night. He was in a lot of the sketches, but he was subdued in most of them. His “Career Day” appearance was easily his most over-the-top and it showed how much he’s willing to throw himself into these characters. It was both ridiculous and hilarious.

Kanye was joined by Lil Pump for “I Love It,” but they skipped the boxy suits for bottled water costumes instead. If you thought this song barely worked as a music video, Kanye was basically saying, ‘Here hold my water’ with this performance. It worked much better when he premiered new song “We Got Love” with Teyana Taylor jumping all around the stage. They sounded stronger and the song held together much better.

For a season premiere, many of the sketches felt half-baked, as if they hadn’t quite come together fully, which is crazy. Last season, weeks that allowed this group more than one week to come up with the show were some of their strongest outings, but that just wasn’t the case here. We did enjoy Pete Davidson talking about what he did over the summer.

And we got some sneak peeks into the camaraderie of the cast behind the scenes, which is always fun. They also introduced new featured player Ego Nwodim, but she did virtually nothing this week. We’ll keep an eye on her to see how she grows throughout the season and hopefully finds her voice.

As usual, we’re ranking all the sketches from worst to first, including the Cold Open and the regular “Weekend Update” segments. We’ll skip the musical guests, because they’re not usually funny – unless Ashlee Simpson shows up. We wrap up with a look at the cast-member who had the strongest week.

MONOLOGUE – Adam Driver

[embedded content]

“One huge spoiler about ‘Star Wars’–” Adam Driver said, before getting interrupted by Beck Bennett, who wanted to talk about his summer. That was essentially the thrust of his monologue, the entire cast wanting to gab about their summer and Adam really hating small talk.He suffered through Kenan Thompson and Aidy Bryant, but when Pete Davidson came out, Pete wasn’t interested in sharing. “No, you’re the one person who’s summer I really want to hear about,” Adam said. But that was the end. It wasn’t hugely hilarious, but it was kind of fun watching Adam sear burning hatred into Kenan, who did his classic “Kenan face” in response.

Vermont

[embedded content]

Beck Bennett proposes white people leave and form their own nation, but Adam Driver says there already is a place like that: Vermont. And then the whole sketch just described “white paradise” and how much it looked like Vermont. It never got to be too much or too funny or too silly or even a little over-the-top. It was just white supremacists thinking Vermont sounds really nice. We can’t imagine Vermont loving the sketch, but otherwise it was disappointingly bland.

Fortnite

[embedded content]

We suppose it was inevitable considering how insanely popular it is, but “SNL” went all in on this “Fortnite” sketch. They had Kyle Mooney, Pete Davidson and Adam Driver as players, but we didn’t expect them to bring the characters to life, too, with Mikey Day as Driver’s character, and Chris Redd and Heidi Gardner rounding out the digital cast. Adam played a middle-aged father who’d never played the game before, so that was it. Mikey mimicked the ridiculous things Adam was making him do, while the other guys got irritated until they all died. But at that point, it was a mercy killing. The sketch could have been funny or had a fun twist, but it had that one visual joke and nothing else.

Rad Times at Frat U

[embedded content]

So that was a weird one. A pre-taped sketch of an 80s frat party with constant freezes to drop notes on the screen about what happened to the people after; none of it good. From the innocent, like a guy who was excited to see girls now being married to a man, to the more serious — though never going so far as assault beyond a forced kiss. We thought the sketch was going somewhere with all of this, but it never really did. Clearly a reference to Kavanaugh’s partying days, but it didn’t skate the edge to drive home any sort of point.

Pete Davidson’s Shadow

[embedded content]

If it wasn’t intentional that announcer Darrell Hammond didn’t even say Kyle Mooney’s name during the opening credits, it fed perfectly into this early-show sketch about his insecurities. After Pete Davidson got engaged to Ariana Grande, Kyle Mooney realized he might never get the recognition he so desperately craves on the show in one of his pre-taped introspective videos. These are always weird and funny and awkward, but it’s where we got the sordid saga of his long romance with Leslie Jones, too, so we’re here for it. This time, he decided to solve his invisibility problem by becoming Pete, complete with blonde hair and slacker attitude. But rather than get a pop star to date, he brought out the real Wendy Williams as his girlfriend, complete with a pig. We also got an inside look at how “SNL” handles internal problems, and it is medieval and not pretty.

Weekend Update

[embedded content]

“If you’re drinking a bunch and you keep a calendar, it’s probably to help piece together what’s happening in your life,” Colin Jost said, as he and Michael Che went in on Kavanaugh’s blustery and angry hearing responses, though we don’t think Michael’s “might be” argument quite holds water.

[embedded content]

They saved a few moments to get into some of the other terrifying news of the summer, like that new and absolutely horrifying mascot for the Philadelphia Flyers. Who approved this monstrosity?

[embedded content]

Kate McKinnon then dropped by as Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg to comment and fire off some Gins-burns at everyone from Kavanaugh to Republican Senator Jeff Flake, who pushed for an FBI investigation to, as she sees it, protect his ass before he votes yes anyway.

[embedded content]

Out of nowhere, Leslie Jones interrupted as Serena Williams, despite the bit being cut. This kind of banter always helps to bring us deeper into the world of “SNL,” helping us connect to the cast-members behind the characters, and we are here for them. Plus, she did look great.

[embedded content]

Finally, and we all knew it was coming, Pete Davidson dropped by to finally answer the question Adam Driver wanted in the “Cold Open.” How did he spend his summer vacation? Well, we all know the details, but he said he hates all the attention. “It’s Malcolm X, Martin Luther King Jr. and Pete Davidson. All people who’ve gotten death threats,” he said. When asked about the prenup situation, Pete said he wanted one. “God forbid we break up and she takes half my sneakers.” He then joked he swapped her birth control for Tic-Tacs. “I believe in us and all,” he said. “I just want to make sure she cant go anywhere.”

COLD OPEN – Kavanaugh Hearing

[embedded content]

With no sign of Alec Baldwin’s Trump, we instead got a fresh and energetic exploration of the Kavanaugh hearing, with Matt Damon absolutely killing it as the Supreme Court nominee. “”I’m gonna start at an 11 and I’m gonna take it to a 15 real quick!” he shouted, setting the stage for alternating anger and tears as he cited Kathy Griffin and Ronan “Sinatra” as part of the left-wing conspiracy against him. The Senators were played by a who’s who of the cast (including Rachel Dratch), with Kate McKinnon coming unhinged as Sen. Lindsey Graham, though we’re not sure she has a completely successful take on him yet. It went a little long, but every time Damon was glowering on-screen, we realized we could take just a little bit more. If Kavanaugh is going to stay in the news cycle, here’s hoping Matt is game to keep playing him.

Career Day

[embedded content]

Pete Davidson’s 82-year-old father, played by Adam Driver, brings the fire as an oil baron who crushes his enemy and grinds their bones into the dirt. Turns out the other kids think he’s a lot cooler than either Pete or the teacher (Aidy Bryant). This was absolutely bizarre, but Adam was so committed to his ridiculous, screaming character that we found ourselves as unable to hold it together as Pete and some of the other students. This recurring sketch has always been hit or miss, but when your “parent” character is this ridiculous and played this well, it’s always going to work.

Coffee Taste Test

[embedded content]

We’ve seen this before, where Mikey Day surprises taste-test participants with a product that isn’t nearly as fancy as they think. This time, it was Burger King coffee, and this time it was Adam Driver and Cecily Strong who got to lose their s–t over it. “You fed my wife this garbage, this burger juice?” Adam shouted incensed, while Cecily kept insisting hers must be the fancy coffee. We’re not sure why these are always funny, but it’s how worked up one couple always gets over being fooled, and Cecily was hilariously clueless throughout.

PLAYER OF THE WEEK

Pete Davidson may have been the most anticipated cast-member in this premiere, if just to hear him make jokes about Ariana Grande, and he did not disappoint, but he didn’t really shine beyond his “Weeked Update” appearance. Remarkably, no single cast-member stepped up in a huge way in this very balanced episode.

So we’re going to give it to the cast-member who sold their spotlight sketch the strongest, which narrows it down to Kyle Mooney and Cecily Strong, with the edge going to Cecily for her ridiculously clueless coffee taster. Yes, we know Kate McKinnon gave us Ruth Bader Ginsburg and Lindsey Graham, but we didn’t love her Graham as much as other characters she’s done.

“Saturday Night Live” continues next week with host Awkwafina and musical guest Travis Scott, Saturday at 11:35 p.m. et on NBC.

Got a story or a tip for us? Email TooFab editors at tips@toofab.com.

View Photos Getty ‘The Walking Dead’ Cast Looked Killer at Season 9 Premiere

Source: http://toofab.com/2018/09/30/adam-driver-snl-sketches-ranked-worst-to-first-matt-damons-brett-kavanaugh-pete-davidsons-summer/