#anyway the next few episodes we'll get to see why exactly he can't love

[disenchanted-youth]

This broke my heart. The blame can't be placed on the usual skepticism about romances, like we often see with characters on screen. Because it's the truth. If Tharn acts on his love, the consequence is death for that person.

Chalothon's words made it clear that he is willing to do anything, including killing someone or even Tharn himself, to ensure that no one takes Tharn away from him. Although Tharn is unaware of the doctor's involvement, he knows something is after him. He has known that his whole life. And he knows that something has been trying to kill Phaya, too.

I absolutely adored the parallels they established between the artist and his lover with Phaya and Tharn. Tharn was forced to look at love throughout the investigation and not push it away like he usually tries to do. And Phaya brought him to his house at precisely the right time. He got to be surrounded by more love and warmth, making him waver more. Because undeniably Phaya stirs up intense feelings in him. Tharn's love for Phaya is incredibly deep, even though he doesn't realize it, spanning lifetimes, deepening his fear of losing him. He also knows that he doesn't have enough strength to keep resisting the pull they feel towards each other. Which is why this sentence hit me hard. You can see he wants it, just as bad as Phaya, but he can't love.

[oliviaischillin1204]

This Fanfiction Of Sanders Sides Is Called "Bluey" Part 1: Roman

[olivia's note: hi everyone! this is part 1 of a fic submitted by the incredible, incomparable anne onymous! i absolutely adore bluey and this fic is so freaking cute i can't stand it. thank you so much! <;3]

chapters 1 (2) (3) (4)

Despite being a fatherly figure, part of Patton would always be a child at heart. That's probably how he found himself watching "Bluey". Sure, it was for kids but lots of older people love it too, including Thomas. He was watching the show in the living room when Emile walked in. "Good morning, Patty-cakes. Whatcha watching?" he asked. "Morning Emmy, I'm just watching this new show. Well, not exactly new, it's been out for quite a while, but you should watch it with me. It's so cute!" Patton explained. Emile sat next to him on the couch and immediately recognised the Heelers. "Oh, you're watching "Bluey", I love this show! How far have you gotten?" Emile inquired. "Actually, I finished it. Just having a little season one rewatch. Want me to go back to episode one?" Patton asked. "Sure, if it's no trouble." Emile said. Patton paused the episode he was on and went back to the episode guide to select "Magic Xylophone", the first episode.

"Oh yeah, I forgot this was on Disney+. I guess I got too used to watching those free episodes on TikTok." Emile said. "Normally I wouldn't encourage piracy, but it does make it a lot fairer for those who can't afford it or or just don't have access to every episode." Patton confessed. "Yeah, that's how I see it too. You know, if we're gonna have a Bluey marathon, might as well do it properly." Emile said, snapping his fingers. In an instant, he was wearing a Bingo onesie and holding a Bluey plushie, and Patton wore a Bluey onesie and had a Bingo plushie. Patton gasped in delight and squealed. "I love this! You can summon things too?!" Patton exclaimed, squeezing the toy. "Uh-huh. It's just not really needed in Cartoon Therapy. And when I do use it, it's almost unnoticeable." Emile explained, hitting play. After dancing along to the intro, Emile noticed Patton seemed to be fidgeting and blushing. "You ok?" Emile asked. "Yeah, it's just this scene." Patton admitted. Emile looked back at the TV and saw Bandit playing Bluey like a piano. 

"Roman did the same thing to me a few days ago. When I asked him what was that for, he said..." Patton started before clearing his throat and removing his glasses. "Really, Padre? I thought you of all Sides would know half as much about Bluey as I do." Patton continued in Roman's voice. "Oh my god, you sounded just like him!" Emile giggled. "Thanks. Anyway, that's how I started watching Bluey. After the first episode, I was hooked." Patton said, putting his glasses back on. "So you weren't looking for ways to get him back?" Emile inquired. "No, but I guess I could still do that since there's quite a few tickling scenes in this show. After all, no one gets away with tickling the tickle monster in this household." Patton replied. "That's it! We'll watch every episode we can think of that has anything to do with tickling and then that could get you some ideas!" Emile suggested. "Great idea, Emile!" Patton agreed. As soon as "Magic Xylophone" ended, so began the search for inspiration. They watched "Daddy Robot", "Hotel", "Butterflies", "Mount Mumandad", "Ticklecrabs" and even "Perfect". By the time they were finished, Patton had a few ideas in mind but wasn't sure which one to use for Roman. 

"Sure, Ticklecrabs is pretty teasy and that really gets to him, but surprise tickles work really well too and I could definitely surprise him by being a crazy pillow or crazy blanket. But "Poor Little Bug On The Wall" gave me a really good idea for a tickle game. Oh, why is this so hard?" Patton complained, burying his face in his Bingo plushie. Emile frowned. He hated seeing Patton like this and anyone could tell you that decision making can be a nightmare if there's too many options. Surely he can help somehow. Then it struck him. "Why not try all the techniques on me first? Then you can decide based on which ones felt the most fitting." Emile suggested. Patton looked at Emile and smiled. "Ok. If you're sure." he agreed, cracking his knuckles. Emile giggled nervously as he laid across Patton's lap. After almost 20 minutes of testing different methods, Emile's glasses were fogged up and he was a sweaty, giggly, panting mess. "Thanks for the help, Dr Giggles." Patton said, sneaking a few quick pokes to Emile's tummy before leaving. Emile yawned and went to his room for a well-deserved nap.

Patton knocked on Roman's door, ready to put his plan into action. "Come iiiiin!" Roman sang from inside. Patton let himself in, trying to suppress a smirk. "Hi Roman!" Patton greeted. "Hey Patt–aww, cute onesie. Bluey, huh? Thought for sure you'd go for Bandit since, well, you know." Roman remarked. "Well, we are both dads." Patton agreed. In an instant, he changed his onesie from Bluey to Bandit. As Roman looked down at himself, he realised Patton gave him the Bluey onesie. "Ooh. Thanks." Roman said. "You're welcome, kiddo. I thought Bluey suited you. Although there is one character I think suits you better." Patton replied, summoning a new onesie. Roman looked at his onesie and realised it changed from Bluey to Muffin. "Hey!" Roman protested, glaring at Patton who was already hunched over, laughing. "Sorry, Roman! I couldn't resist!" Patton chuckled, changing the onesie back to Bluey as Roman pouted and mumbled grumpily. "Awww, don't be grouchy. I think I know what'll turn that frown upside down, Mr Grumpy." Patton said, taking his phone out and selecting a Bluey episode: Daddy Robot. Roman smiled and the two sat together on his bed as they watched. 

After a few minutes, the scene where Bandit treats Bluey like a banjo was about to play and Patton was ready to strike. Without warning, he grabbed Roman by the wrists and started "strumming" across his belly. "Gah! Patton, what are you do–Ah! Hahahahaha! Pahahattohohon! Whyhyhyhy?!" Roman chuckled. "My oh my, this is one chatty banjo." Patton teased. Roman was internally facepalming right now. How did he forget Patton is the biggest tickle monster in the Mind Palace? He couldn't help himself when he did what he did last week. When he saw Patton napping in his room with his shirt ridden up, his exposed tummy was practically begging for tickles! And all the different laughs he makes when he's tickled are so cute, from his giggles and snorts, to his baby-like cackles. Curse his adorably misleading ticklishness! "Wait a minute, this isn't a banjo. Silly me. It's a piano!" Patton exclaimed as he released Roman's wrists, singing a tune as he started "playing" him across his ribs and tummy. Roman kicked frantically, curled into himself and even attempted to crawl away, but Patton wasn't letting him go. 

"Ladies, gentlemen and esteemed guests, my sincerest apologies. I seem to be having a bit of a struggle with this piano." Patton joked as he dragged Roman back to his lap. Roman tried to groan but was too busy laughing. He should've known that line would come back to haunt him. "Pahahahat, plehehease! I'm sohohohorry! Hahahahaha!" Roman cackled. "What's the magic word?" Patton asked. "Stohohohop!" Roman squealed. "Actually the magic word was "xylophone", but I'll accept "stop" since this is only fun for me when it's fun for you and you're getting tired." Patton said, stopping immediately. As Roman caught his breath, Patton summoned a glass of water and gave it to him. "Thanks." Roman sighed, gulping it down. "So, what have we learned today?" Patton asked. "Always expect revenge when you tickle the tickle monster?" Roman guessed. "That's there's only one tickle monster and it's not you, mister." Patton said, booping Roman's nose on the last word. "Can't you be THE tickle monster and I can be A tickle monster? Roman reasoned. "Are we gonna have to perform an encore?" Patton asked, wiggling his fingers threateningly. "Nope! Lesson learned." Roman assured, covering his stomach protectively. Patton giggled and got up to leave. 

"At least you're not worse than Remus." Roman muttered. "Huh? What does Remus have to do with anything?" Patton asked. Roman froze. "I don't know, what does Remus have to do with this?" he stammered hesitantly. "You just said I wasn't worse than him. What did you mean by that?" Patton inquired. "I didn't say that." Roman denied. "Roman, don't lie to me." Patton said sternly. Roman sighed. "Fine. Sometimes he randomly pops in here out of the blue and tickles me until I nearly pass out or wet myself. He doesn't care if I keep saying "stop" and I usually have to physically pry him off, if I even have the strength to." Roman explained. "That's horrible! Tickling is supposed to be fun, it's practically a game we're born with in our systems. I know Remus goes overboard with a lot of things, but this is where I draw the line. That kiddo needs a punishment and I'm just the dad for the job. Where is he?" Patton ranted. "How should I know? I'm not a dark Side. Ask Virgil, he used to be one." Roman suggested. "Good thinking, I'll go find him. If Remus comes in here while I'm gone, scream for me." Patton said, leaving the room. "Oh, I'll be screaming alright." Roman grumbled.

To be continued...

[banana789]

Choni x reader. Pranks

Pov - You decided to get revenge on Cheryl and Toni

You were fuming.

Lately Cheryl and Toni had been pulling loads of pranks on you. They thought it was absolutely hilarious when they would leave rubber snakes all over the house to scare you. Or when they filled your room full of balloons. They weren't exactly smart pranks but they enjoyed it.

However don't me wrong it was the usual deal. They could prank you. But if anyone else did they would regret it milliseconds later.

For example last weekend You, Cheryl, Toni, Betty and Jughead were all in Jugheads trailer to binge watch stranger things. Cheryl and Toni had popped out to pick up more snacks after you'd fallen asleep on Cheryl halfway through the last episode. You were wrapped up lying on the sofa. But Jughead decided it would be funny to put some whipped cream on your hand and tickle your nose, leading you to smack yourself in the face and become covered. Waking yourself up. Unfortunately for him Cheryl and Toni also walked in at this moment. Let's just say it did not end well for him.

Like he now has a black eye.

So anyway Cheryl and Toni love playing pranks on you. They find it adorable when you get scared or annoyed at them. You were currently giving them the silent treatment after they'd made you believe that your house was haunted. Long story.

You walked down the stairs to be greeted with Cheryl and Toni making breakfast. They both smiled at you.

"Hey Cutie, want some pancakes?"Cheryl asked. Offering you a plate.

However instead of taking it you simply looks straight ahead of you and walked towards the cereal. Trying to stay stubborn with the delicious smell of the pancakes.

"Oh so we're still doing the silent treatment?" Toni chuckled for her seat at the table.

You ignored her and went to go sit on the other end of the table.

"Ok ignore us that's fine, we'll just eat all of these pancakes on our own... And this bacon." Cheryl sang waving the plate in front of you. Bending down and tickling your ear with her breath.

"Ugh look we're sorry" She said standing up and sitting opposite you at the table. Toni having now moved to sit next you.

"I still can't believe you don't have milk with your cereal, Weirdo." Toni said ruffling your hair as she sat down.

"Toni we're trying to get her to like us again stop bullying her." Cheryl scolded.

"Oh please she loves us. But seriously nerd you give us the silent treatment any longer and I will stuff you in a locker." Toni said glaring at you.

You stared back and were locked into a staring contest giving toni giving her a tough look. A few seconds later she crumbled.

"Omg are you actually mad we're so sorry we love you so much. I sware to god you better talk to us we can't last without you." Toni said pouting, grabbing you shoulders.

As hard as you tried you couldn't fight the smile that took over your face. You pushed Toni off and looked away.

"Haha did you see that she loves usss" Toni laughed squeezing you from behind . Cheryl walking round the table to join in.

"Come on lets go watch a movie" said Cheryl .

"No way I'm still mad at you guys"You said crossing your arms.

"We'll watch a marvel movie?" Cheryl tried.

You still shook you head with a pout.

Cheryl just nodded at Toni then walked into the living room as Toni dragged your chair out from under the table then lifted you over her shoulder amd carried you into the living room. Despite your best efforts to escape which were met by a swift slap on the ass and a giggle from Toni.

She placed you down next to Cheryl and sat next to you Cheryl pulling a blanket over you all as you sat there plotting how to get revenge.

The next day

Soooo you has finally gotten revenge on Cheryl and Toni .

But accidently.

The point had been to get revenge on Toni first. You had put green hair dye in  Tonis conditioner. (Comes out in one wash your not that mean) but what you hadn't expected was for Cheryl to be showering with Toni .

Not sure why I didn't see that coming.

Anyway as you can probably tell Cheryl takes pride in her hair. And she was not fond of the green streaks. Toni was definitely not happy either . Pink and bright green did not go well on her.

Anyway so after you had swapped the conditioner you ran to your room and pushed your desk in front of the door as you heard the shower turning on, laughing to yourself.

However ten minutes later you heard a scream.

"Y/NNNNNNNNN!!!" but it wasn't Toni.

It was Cheryl.

You gulped as everything went silent for a few minutes before you heard pounding on your door.

"Y/n"

Huh they sounded surprisingly calm.

"Yes?"I answered

"Open the door" Cheryl requested calmly.

"Whyyy?" I asked.

"BECAUSE YOU DIED OUR HAIR GREEN" Cheryl screamed through the door.

"What no I didn't" you yelled back.

"Then who did? " Toni asked pushing on the door . The desk starting to move as I crawled under my bed.

"Ummmm Archie ? " I suggested wincing as the door was pushed open.

Everything went quiet as you listened for footsteps.

Suddenly you felt two hand wrap around your ankles and pull you out from under the bed. You looked up and gave them a cute smile and puppy dog eyes. Trying not to laugh when you noticed their green hair .

But they on the other hand did not look happy.

They both glared down at you with there arms crossed.

"So babe, what shall we do to the little nerd." Toni said tilting her head with an evil smile.

"Hmmm I don't know TT. We could die her hair like she died ours."Cheryl suggested.

"Yep or we could tickle her for an hour" Toni suggested.

"Orrrr burn her books." Cheryl suggested.  You gulped as there was a moment of silence before a friendlier smile came over there faces.

"Buttt were not gonna do any of that" Toni laughed as she grabbed your hands and helped you up.

"What? Your not gonna kill me?" You asked confused.

"No babe you were getting revenge for our pranks were proud of you" Cheryl said hugging you from behind and kissing your cheek making you squirm.

"What no you should be mad not proud." You said frustrated.

"Oh really haha cos if anyone else that wasn't you did that I would have killed them. " Toni said raising they're eyebrows.

"You would never kill meee " You laughed. Walking up to Toni and hugging her.Resting your head on her chest.

"The reason we kept praying you was because we wanted to make sure you would stand up for yourself eventually" Cheryl explained joining the hug.

"And because your angry face is really cute" Toni laughed ruffling your hair.

Two weeks later.

"I still dont believe you pranked Cheryl and Toni." Veronica insisted as you Cheryl Toni and Betty were having a girls day at thistlehouse.

"Yh no way your too innocent" Betty agreed. You three were sat in the living room while Cheryl and Toni were in the kitchen getting snacks.

"Oh yh fine then I'll mess with them now" You said smiling.

"Hey Toni, Cheryl could I habe some water please?"

The moving around in the kitchen stopped as they both froze. Suddenly they both ran in, Toni holding a bottle of water. She slowly passed it to you as they both looked down at you.

"Thank you Toni" You smiled as you took a sip.

They gave you a weird look before slowly retreating back to the kitchen.

"What the hell was that?" Veronica asked.

You smiled as you got up and eld them towards the kitchen. Pointing towards Cheryl amd Toni who were frantically running round the kitchen, rifling through the cupboards and looking throught the calender trying to see if they'd forgotten anything.

"I only ever call them by their first names when I'm mad"  You giggled causing Veronica and Betty to laugh. The sound of laughing case Cheryl and Toni to look up and catch onto the situation . Chasing you Betty and Veronica to gulp before quickly running out of the room.

Out of the house in fact. Trying to get to Veronicas car with two pissed of serpents on their tail.

[takerfoxx]

The Sandman, Season 1, Episode 3, "Dream a Little Dream of Me," First Impressions!

"Fuck it, let's go to Hell!"

Yeah, I know that line had nothing to do with the plot of this episode, but c'mon, what a stinger.

And hey, can we just take a moment to give it up for Patton Oswalt for getting to live the fanboy dream, no pun intended? A few years ago my sister and I attended a Neil Gaiman talk and autograph signing, and Oswalt was the host, and he started the night by basically confessing that he grew up as the biggest Gaiman fan ever, so much so that they basically hired Gaiman's stalker to host the show. And now he gets to play (well, voice) one of the most important characters in the long-awaited Sandman adaptation.

So anyway, this episode was surprisingly nostaglic, but for a different reason than what I was expecting. When I first graduated high school, I made a point to marathon all of Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel, mainly because I fell in love with Firefly and wanted to see Whedon's other works (no, I am not going to talk about recent controversies). And I loved them deeply. There was just something about the whole gothic urban fantasy mysteries with pithy dialogue and corny jokes I found appealing. Never did move onto Supernatural for whatever reason, but I thoroughly enjoyed my time in the Buffyverse.

This reminded me a lot of that, even if the source material, both Sandman and Hellblazer, predates Buffy by a good amount. Johanna's flashbacks to the Job Gone Wrong and the bit with the princess's possessed fiance were much in that same vein, and were a ton of fun. I can't help but wonder if that little girl in Johanna's nightmare is going to show up in Hell the next episode.

Even though I knew it was coming, I still popped hard when Mad Hettie basically stepped off the page. As much as I've enjoyed what's been changed, expanded upon, and updated, I still appreciate the parts where they went, "Nah, this is fine the way it is. Just adapt it word-for-word."

I would have liked to have the Mr. Sandman musical drops. It would've been funny. Wait, did they have it and I just missed it?

Speaking of which, while it would be neat to have the John Constantine, rights are what they are, and Johanna made for a very impressive replacement. She was exactly the kind of messy individual who's trying her best but has made a ton of mistakes, has hurt a lot of people, and is also just so done with everyone coming to her with their problems, and yet so can't look away. I wonder if they renamed her ancestor in the coming Men of Good Fortune episode. I guess we'll see.

Also, to everyone complaining about how changing the Constantine character female made the show even more gay, go and look into John Constantine's romantic history. There's a reason why making King Shark his ex in Harley Quinn actually isn't that farfetched.

I was bummed that the only rogue dream we got in Rachel's apartment was that reunion with the fake Rachel. It was very good, yes, but I was looking forward to the trippy house haunted by her dreams, with the rogue Nightmares pissing their pants when they realize that Dream is present and the inside-out guy on the walls. I did smirk when Johanna mentioned telling Rachel's father about her passing, because this version of the guy actually got lucky compared to his comic counterpart. Ouch.

And in regards to what I said earlier about Gaiman taking this show as a do-over, building up the tension between Dream and Matthew is actually kind of a nice touch, as the conflict with their relationship was mainly around Dream just being a little cold and standoffish with him because he's like that with everyone, but this has something for them to actually work out, along with a very good reason for Dream not wanting another raven along, given what happened to the last one.

The John Dee and Ethel Cripps stuff now fell more-or-less to how it went in the comics, albeit a bit more dramatic. And gory. I really like this depiction of him. He's both something sympathetic while also being rather horrifying. It just brings a human layer to the character that will serve to make the diner episode even more horrific. I also smirked at the sidelong references to Doctor Destiny that don't violate trademark but do wink at it.

Corinthian wasn't as active here as I was expecting, but he is still lurking in the background, nudging things around to fuck things up for Dream. I wonder if his end will be the same as the comics. I hear they spiced up the confrontation between him and Dream to make it more appropriate as a season finale, but it still would be really funny if after all of his attempts to basically assassinate Dream throughout the season, he still meets his end via Dream just crashing his Cereal Convention speech. Like, you try so hard to kill a motherfucker, doesn't work, and then you go to hang out with your friends to burn off steam, only for him to ruin your big moment with a, "I lived, bitch!"

Okay, time for the momentum to really pick up. Let's go to Hell!

[sery-chan-13]

Stay High

Karube Daikichi × Reader

Based off this song

No, because It's a three am sad thought that should have been kept in my head. This is totally not based off of my deepest darkest feeling and fears. Anyways, ignore that. Um... yeah.

Warnings: Episode 3 spoilers, Manga spoilers, weed, smoking, suicide (this went darker than I intended, ok?), and another terrible attempt at angst :)

"Karu! For the last time, we're not getting a freaking parrot!" You scolded. "Aww, why not babe? They're cute," he said, pouting. You smiled kissing him quickly. "... I'll think about it," you said, before heading out. "I think that means we will have a-" "Don't push your luck babe. I'll see you after work."

_______________________________________

"And here is my attempt at trying to be nice. Happy anniversary!" You chirped, sliding a rather large gift his way. It had a draped cover over it, so he couldn't see inside. He looked at you suspiciously, slowly taking it in his hands. You had a camera in your hands, and we're smirking. He didn't trust that smirk. "Why do you have that camera?" He asked, nodding to it. "Just filming. It's a special day babe," you said, hiding your smile. "Can i-" "Don't you dare shake it-" He raised his hands in mock surrender, before slowly lifting the sheet.

You saw the smile that spread across his face. "I said I'd think about it," you said. He stood up, pulling your waist into him. He kissed you softly, making you smile in your head. "I'm guessing this means you like your gift?" You asked, a smirk on your face. "It's a fucking parrot, hell yeah I like it," he said. You laughed, pressing a kiss to his temple.

Tears blurred your vision, falling onto the screen of the camera. Had it really been a year since then?

"Ok, now I get to film you! Welcome to day 1 of our roadtrip, I don't know where we're going, but we'll find out soon enough," Karube said, turning the camera to face him. He then turned it to face you. You were putting your luggage into the trunk of your car, and looked up with a smile, giving the camera a peace sign. The parrot, who you two decided to name Nijiko after much deliberation due to its coloring, squawked on your shoulder. You smiled. "Yes, you'll be going to day care  for a while Nijiko," you spoke to the bird, petting it's beak softly. The bird shivered. "Day care? Nijiko day care?" It squawked, tilting it's head to the side. You nodded. "Yes, smart bird. Nijiko is going to daycare," you praised. "I sometimes wonder if she loves the bird more than me. The answer is yes. Yes she does," Karube said, laughing as you spoke to the bird.

"Update, it's been 4 hours, and we are in the middle of no where. The child(the bird) has been dropped off at day care... well boarding? For the week. The music's pretty good though, and this angel next to me is still here, so we're all good," he said. He was really serious about filming this. "Babe, why are you filming this again?" You asked, reaching to grab his hand on the center console. "Because memories baby girl," he responded, kissing the back of your hand as it was intertwined with his. You laughed, blowing him a kiss, turning your attention back to the road.

"Day 3 of our roadtrip, (Y/N) is deciding on what to wear, but as I've told her, she looks great in everything," he stated. You flipped him off, picking out something to wear finally. "Wowwwww, I can really feel the love," he said sarcastically, holding a hand to his chest dramatically. "Shut up, you know I love you," you said, rolling your eyes. "I know you do. Who wouldn't love me?" he joked. "I don't know babe. Watch it though, 'cause you're mine~!"

"Ok, it's a few hours later, (Y/N) is getting snacks, and I'm super nervous, because of this," he said, talking to camera. He pulled out a small box, showing the ring to the camera. "I've been documenting this whole thing like a maniac, because I didn't want her to be suspicious. But anyways, yeah... I've been thinking about it for a while, seeing as we've been together since high school. I am terrified, in all honesty," he rambled, running a hand through his hair. He put the small box back to where you wouldn't find it, but he wouldn't lose it. He saw you walking back to the car, and smiled. You opened the door, giving him a weird look. "You're filming again?" You questioned. He nodded. "You love the sound of your voice don't you?" You asked with a smile. He laughed, "Not as much as I love yours."

_______________________________________

He placed the camera was on a nearby fence post, facing you two, close enough to see and hear both of you. He started recording, and gave a thumbs up to the camera. You looked out to the water, admiring the hues of blue. The water crashed into the shore, spraying you with water. "You know when we get married, I'm definitely going to take you here again," he said. You kept looking out at the water, not noticing him. "When we get married? You already have this planed?" You laughed. You turned to face him, not seeing him at eye level. You looked down, and your eyes widened. "As I was saying, when we get married-" he started, getting interrupted when you jumped onto him, throwing your arms around his neck. You both fell to the sand, and you two couldn't help but laugh. "Are you serious? Like, really?" You asked, tears in your eyes. "Yeah, I'm serious. (Y/N), you've been with me for what seems like forever. I love you so much, and I want to be yours forever. Just as much as you'll be mine. So... would you do me the honor, and marry me?" He asked. He might have sounded confident, but he was shaking on the inside. The tears in your eyes fell, and you laughed nodding. "Yes, a million times yes," you said. He laughed, letting out a sigh of relief. You hugged him tightly, your head in the crook of his neck. "Forever and ever?" You whispered. "Forever and ever."

You looked down at the ring on your finger, crying even harder. His side of the bed stayed empty, no one would ever be able to sleep there. Not even you. His side of the room stayed untouched. The same way it had been left that morning. Before the accident.

"(Y/N)... I know you're sad, but this isn't healthy for you... just... call me back once you get this," Arisu sighed. "No answer again?" Usagi asked, placing a hand on his shoulder. He shook his head. "She's been with our group as long as I can remember. And she's been... she had been... with Karube even longer. If it's hard on me, I can't believe how hard it must be on her," Arisu explained. Usagi pressed a kiss to his cheek. "I'm sure she's fine. All people cope with things differently. Just give her space."

You were most definitely not fine. The grief that filled you everytime you saw Arisu's name on your phone, when you looked at anything that once belonged to Karube.  For the first time in the past few weeks, you wandered into the kitchen, and saw the binder filled with the ideas you two had for the wedding. You looked away, tears filling your eyes once more. You couldn't escape the sorrow that had filled your life. It seemed like he was everywhere. Even when you turned on the damn TV the news was talking about the incident. The names of the victims would pop up with pictures, and you would quickly turn it off. You grabbed the folder, ripping up all the papers in there, shredding them to bits in a fit of sadness. You dropped to your knees, holding the final piece of paper. You sniffled, wiping your eyes, looking down. It was in Karube's hand writing, and you took a deep breath. Eventually, you would have to read these things. Eventually, you would have to clean up his side of the room. You decided to start off small. By reading whatever this was.

'I may not be good at expressing my feelings, and this is not going to be the first time you've all heard me tell you how wonderful this woman is, and how much I love her. It certainly won't be the last, if I have any say in it. To which I do. If I could go back to the day we met, and you told me I would be marrying her, I would believe it. Because I've loved you from day one (Y/N). And now, I'll have you. Forever and ever.'

- Karube (rough draft, don't let (Y/N) find this)

You whimpered, holding the piece of paper to your chest. This was too much for you. You needed a distraction.

"Eh, just give me the money, no one will ever know," the woman said. You gave her the money, and she passed you a bag. "I promise it gets better dear. And be careful with that," she said sweetly. You nodded, your face so devoid of any emotion, it was hard to tell if you were still alive. Your world felt so numb to any emotion but hurt.

The burn of the smoke in your throat was satisfying. For the first time since his death, you felt something. Your eyes lazily looked up, staring at the ceiling.  The smell of the weed filled up the room and you rolled your eyes. For once the pain was gone. You couldn't think of anything in the moment other than being hungry. The first time in weeks that had happened.

That was your new routine. Wake up, lounge around, look through the videos and pictures of both of you, get high of your mind. It was the only way you'd forget. Was it healthy? No. Did you care? Also no. You started ignoring Arisu's calls, messages, and voice mails. Leaving them unseen, and unheard. He was worried, and Usagi had gotten worried as well, even though she'd only met you once at the hospital. You seemed like a pleasant person, and according to Arisu, you never left someone in the dark that long. You would usually respond quickly if you weren't at work. But, do to the incident, there wasn't work for a few weeks. That made him worry.

When he found out why you weren't answering, he was shocked. Your apartment wasn't exactly a mess. There were a few papers scattered in the kitchen, and uncollected mail, but other than that, your apartment was clean. He was so confused, hearing you giggling and talking to yourself in your room.

He knocked on the door, opening it slowly. "(Y-y/N)?" He asked hesitantly. You looked up, your eyes lazy and red. The smell of weed in your room was strong, the smoke going out of the window. How long had you been doing this? Had it become self destructive? These were questions he asked himself before seeing you doze off to sleep.

"What the hell were you thinking (Y/N)! You can't- you can't destroy your life over it! I- I was so worried! I've already lost two friends, I can't lose you too!" He scolded. It was a few hours later, and your high had passed. "Why do you care?" You snapped, the conversation being boring to you. The hurt you hadn't felt in weeks came back. He was back in your mind, not as your wonderful fiancé, but as the man you had lost. The man who you had to bury in the ground. It was horrible. Your mind hated the images of his body, lifeless and devoid of his usual smile. You hated it. Absolutely despised it.

"Because you're my friend! You've been my friend since high school! I know it hurts (Y/N), believe me I know, but you can't destroy your fucking life and mental health!" He scolded. It was so unfair to you, in your head. That he was saying something like that. "You want to know what's really destroying my mental health?! Not having him anymore! The fact that he's dead, and I can't- I can't-" you couldn't finish your sentence. Arisu felt bad, but this was an intervention. He had to be a bit forceful for you to stop. "Karube wouldn't want you to do this," he said softly. You felt more tears fall. But you didn't know how to deal with this. "How do you know what he wants?! He's dead!" You screamed. "H-hes dead," you whispered, your voice breaking. Arisu hugged you tightly as you cried. "Can I just know why?" He asked. "He's gone, and I have to stay high all the time to keep him off my mind. Gotta stay high... all my life to forget I'm missing him," you whispered. It was true. It was the only way you could feel something other than pain. The smoke made your mind hazy, and your sadness drifted away. But it wasn't healthy. And it would never be. "It gets better (Y/N)... please, just... stay with me for a week. So I can have peace of mind?"

2 years later

You sat on the sand of the beach, the waves crashed onto the rocks nearby, and a breeze blew the salt water into your face. You looked down at the ring on your finger, sighing at the sight of the shiny gem. You smiled sadly, pressing a kiss to it. "Soon my darling... soon we'll be together again. Forever and ever."

Because the high kept him off your mind, you didn't learn how to cope any other way. The only way was to feel any other pain. You had tried to meet other people, but no one was ever as good. You couldn't even talk to other guys without feeling guilt. It felt wrong. It was like whatever you did, you couldn't get over it. At all. In fact, it had gotten worse over the years. Especially on the yearly anniversary of the incident. Reporters would go to your home and ask you questions, seeing as people had asked you while you were in the hospital. How we're you supposed to get over it when you were reminded constantly?

So there was no thoughts in your head as you walked into the water. It was cold, shocking you. If you didn't drown, you'd die of hypothermia. And that was fine with you.

Forever and ever, no?

Ok, ok, ok.... wow, wowowowowow, this was a three am sad thought that did not have to be written, ok, um wow... that was darker than I intended, holy shit-

I promise I'm done with the terrible attempts at angst, and I promise I'm working on the my other oneshots/books. It's just that when I have an idea, I need to write it before I forget.

Remember that people love you, even if you think no one does, I promise you they do. If you really need help, please find it, and if you would like, I'm always glad to talk to people if they need my help.

[punkscowardschampions]

Grace & Janis

Grace: Not to cause drama but your man can't stay away 😂💓 insisted on giving me the caravan keys himself this morning babes Janis: 'Cos he's not my man, go hog wild Grace: OH HUNNY NO 😭 WHAT HAPPENED? OMG DID HE GO TOO FAR WITH THE PRETTY WOMAN SITU Janis: No, sadly I'm not 3 grand better off for it, Grace. Janis: Just run its course, I'm over it. Grace: I can't believe he'd use you like that! 🐖 After you took him on hols too OUTRAGEOUS 😧 Grace: You'll be okay though babe you are better off if he's gonna be like that Grace: OMG ITS THE CURSE OF SKERRIES! REMEMBER ME AND TY Janis: Maybe I used him? Ever think of that Janis: Nah, I don't...which one was that Grace: That's right gurl ♀ take control of the narrative Grace: You dumped him, consider it announced 💋 Grace: He had that well buff neck tat, remember? Janis: Its the truth. Nothing happened anyway, not proper. Janis: I'd rather keep it to myself but if you must, cheers Janis: Ahh, borstal boy Grace: 🙊 Gotcha 😇 Grace: Is that in 11? He was from there Grace: Anyway you should come on my juice cleanse Janis: No Grace, lol never mind, don't worry about it Janis: How am I gonna work out with nothing but a belly full of juice? I need protein Janis: but I wouldn't hate the vitamins and electrolytes, sometimes Grace: Oh Jan-Jan EVERYONE else manages it 🙄 but you are going through a break up 😢 just don't eat your feelings too hard. Asia's still trying to lose lbs 2 boys later 🙈 Grace: Yayyy! Come to town with me. It's lush there. 😜 drinks aren't bad either lol Janis: That's because you all only do half an hour of light cardio at best Janis: No I'm not, and there are no feelings to eat, I'll be in better shape now he's gone, more time to hit the gym, no more cafe shit Janis: Asia just wants an excuse to get fat, in or out of a relationship Janis: Not today, I'm busy but tomorrow lunch maybe Janis: I cba to be at school for any more time than is required Janis: might throw a sickie Grace: Rude! I know you're hurting but there's no need to come for me and my gym routine Grace: You don't have to pretend with me, babes 🤗 Grace: Unfair, Jan! She's been to WW and everything! It's so sad. Such a struggle Grace: YES! I'll phone in too. We can have a duvet day together. SISTER TIME SICKIE Grace: 💕 You'll feel better in no time Janis: I truly ain't. Janis: And if you don't want me to come for it, try harder, same goes for Asia. Janis: If she actually wanted it, she could, simple as. Janis: Nah, you have to spread my side of the story, don't you? Need you on the frontlines Janis: Plus, I'm going nan and grandad's, not home Grace: EXCUSE YOU BITCH I WAS AT THE GYM FOR 3 HOURS LAST NIGHT Grace: Okay yeah good point, can't let him chat shit about you after everything ugh Janis: Taking selfies? Lol, alright, alright, well done you Janis: I'm sure he won't.. Janis: It'll be everyone else Janis: Don't try and 'come' for him, Grace, that would be so embarrassing. Just set other people right, that's what I mean, right? Grace: thnx 😘 Grace: Boys can't even help themselves Grace: Oh Jan I'm not gonna fight him!! 😂 Don't worry I got this Janis: Yeah but just don't even chat to him Janis: I know YOU can't help yourself Janis: but I don't need it, Grace Grace: 🤐 Going to him for goss? Please. I'd never. Grace: He'd only lie anyway Grace: I can't 🤞 to hold the girls back tho Janis: For God's sake, its none of their business Janis: This is what I mean, everyone getting involved, can't people just leave it Grace: Bailey did lock lips with him first, babe Grace: You can't blame her for feeling wronged Janis: Yeah I can, when she practically grabs up on boys like Trump Janis: Its not on Janis: If she wants to try again, she can, she don't need to drag my name into her piss-poor attempt at chat Grace: Your ex WOULD say it went down like that 🙄 Grace: He's so gross! I shouldn't have let you near him 😧 Janis: It isn't just him Janis: she's getting herself a worse rep than she already had Grace: OMG JANIS STOP SLUT SHAMING MY FRIEND Grace: I can't believe my twin is such a bad feminist Janis: I can't believe you're siding with the abuser, and not believing a victim Janis: If you wanna chat that bullshit Janis: so leave it out Grace: You shouldn't throw words like that around. It's no joke Janis: It isn't. Janis: Let JGG know before she gets in trouble Grace: YOU STILL LOVE HIM, DON'T YOU? 😭 SO SAD Grace: I get you siding with your boy now Grace: poor Jan-Jan. I'll get him back for you don't worry Janis: No, it wasn't that deep, it was only a few months, get real Janis: Never did Janis: I don't want him back, focus on getting him for yourself, like you always wanted Grace: Oh honey...whatever you need to tell yourself sweetie Grace: I hate hearing you like this Grace: He really did a number on you 😢 Grace: We'll say no more about him Janis: I'm not you, Grace. I don't have to pretend it was love in the moment, or after, just to make myself fell better and to let the world know I'm not a skank. Janis: Good, stop talking, you've got no idea. Grace: DON'T TAKE YOUR MOOD OUT ON ME I'M ONLY TRYING TO HELP Janis: Well you're not so stop trying, thanks Grace: Well now I know what to get you for christmas ffs! Grace: You need therapy, girl Grace: No-one else can talk to you when you're like this Janis: I hope you've not pulled me in secret santa, 'cos you're almost as bad at gifting as 'helping' Janis: you can't either, you just like the sound of your own voice Janis: and i'm the fucked up one, lol Grace: Mum and dad will send you, you know, they're always chatting about it Grace: see how edgy you are then Janis: good luck, i'm capable of keeping my mouth shit for more than five minutes Janis: no wonder all your boyfriends use yours then bounce, who could bare you Janis: if we weren't related to you, none of us would Grace: Maybe that's your problem, babe. Jimmy obvs wasn't feeling the strong silent type Grace: At least I've had boyfriends you've done it once and think you're an expert Grace: No wonder he got fed up Janis: Yeah, he's really after a girl just like you, that's why he does everything possible to avoid you Janis: You're the clueless one, Cher lol Grace: It's hilarious to me that you think I was ever interested in your fuckboy barista Grace: Both lads he works with are well fitter for a start Grace: I was happy for you, doesn't mean I'd be happy to go there Janis: You're so blatant the old dears having their pot of tea went to fucking pray for you after Janis: The idea you think you're slick enough that he didn't notice, I didn't notice, that the whole fucking town isn't aware who you want to ride next, is what's hilarious Janis: Sort yourself out, its embarrassing Grace: Nothing could be as embarrassing as having you for a sister 😂 Grace: Go cry to nan babes I'm over it Janis: The feeling's more than mutual, GracieGuru Janis: No one crying but you, as per Grace: As if I'd waste the mascara. Get a life Janis: I've got one, and it isn't yours to share; a fact you haven't been able to stand since you fell out of mum with me Grace: 😂 WHERE? You've got no friends, no lad and you hang out with our grandparents most nights Grace: so much to envy Janis: and yet, I'd sooner that than yours Janis: and that's what's really sad Janis: poor wittle gracie poo Grace: Next time you go running just keep going like Grace: Nobody'll mind here Janis: Yeah, 'cos they all love you Janis: You don't fit in Janis: Changeling baby, nowhere else to go Janis: Mum always liked taking in strays Grace: Must've been why she kept you Janis: Burn Grace: If you fit in so well why are you never here Grace: Too busy thinking you're above me to bother with the rest. That's sad Janis: Cos I can't fucking stand you, Grace Janis: and if I'm anywhere within a mile radius of you, I'm liable to kill you Janis: and you aren't worth the prison time Grace: Wow I'm so intimidated Janis: You aren't meant to be Janis: No one here but you needs to front Janis: Its the truth, you make my life hell Grace: Chats the girl who does nothing but Grace: You only went out with the barista because you THOUGHT I was interested Grace: Such a loser move Grace: Don't expect me to feel bad for you Janis: Jokes on you because I didn't go out with him Janis: He wanted you and your marauding band of molesters to get the hint and leave him and the others alone Janis: and you just made yourself look more and more idiotic every time, just been laughing about you behind your back this whole time Janis: It was a laugh Janis: So, do you get it now, hun? I'm not devvo, I'm just bored of making a fool out of you when you're happy to do it by yourself every day of your life Grace: Like I'd believe that. He dumped you because you're so crap you can't even make a candlelit bath sexy, cope with it Janis: Believe what you want, sweetheart, I'm not the one that's full of shit Grace: Yeah you are Janis: Oh honey...whatever you need to tell yourself sweetie Grace: @yourself next time babes Janis: you already did Janis: i bow to your infinite wisdom Janis: you should write a blog, oh wait- you already do and no one fucking reads it, 'cos you're a basic bitch giving children life advice like you have any idea what you're doing Grace: And you do? 😂 Faking a relationship for MONTHS to mess with me when all I've been is supportive about you getting a lad in the first place Grace: Such a good one of yours Janis: Yeah, this is hilarious Janis: like you ain't reacting exactly how I hoped you would, you pathetic bitch Janis: I knew it was fake, you need to catch yourself on Janis: fake friends, fake fun, fake boyfriends, fake happiness Janis: its honestly sad, you need therapy Grace: Yeah I need to catch myself on to how pathetic you are for literally living a cliche so bad it wouldn't air on CW Grace: To think I thought you were actually sorting yourself out. That's sad Janis: and yet, you and your gal pals lap up every episode Janis: just like you did here, so predictable i could set a watch to you Janis: what, to be like you? you're so sorted? Janis: no one wants to be like you grace, no one would ever want that Janis: you can joke and hashtag about goals, but if having to see you is anything like having to be you Janis: i'd sooner join edie Grace: That's a sick thing to say. Don't bring her into your bullshit, Janis Janis: MY bullshit? Janis: This ain't nothing but you, as per Janis: You're like fucking black mould, spreading everywhere, ruining everything, suffocating us all Janis: and I can talk about her all I fucking want, fuck you Janis: just cos you wanna pretend she didn't exist Grace: No I don't I just don't think it's fair that you use her death to play the victim with me now Grace: To say you'd rather die than deal with your bs is gross Janis: Yeah its only okay when you do it Janis: woe is you Janis: suicide is so gross ew Janis: what a problematic cunt you are Grace: You using it to guilt me is Grace: If you want to kill yourself don't put that on me Grace: You gonna leave me tapes? Fuck off Janis: Why not? Janis: Someone's at fault Janis: we all know who's fault it was Edie died Janis: its no secret Grace: And I'm at fault for your EVERY issue, sure Jan Grace: Don't take any responsibility at all Janis: Did I say that? Janis: You're a cunt, own it Janis: Don't pretend you care, 'cos I didn't ask you to and it does fuck all for me or you Janis: I'm not interested in being your sister, never mind anything beyond a familial tie so drop dead, sincerely Grace: I do care, bitch. How dare you. Grace: Yeah like death fixes anything. I'd still be your sister. Cope with it Janis: At least you'd be my dead sister, that's easier Grace: Yeah because you handle it all so well Janis: Better than I handle having to be anywhere near you Janis: Don't you get it yet? I hate you Grace: Then don't be. Run away to Grandad's. Nobody is bothered I already told you Janis: You are, you delusional cunt! Janis: You always try to talk to me, you won't leave me the fuck alone Janis: who started this conversation Janis: I do everything that's humanly possible to avoid you and you still won't sto

[handonhaven]

So people are making it seem like Aria won't be in 3x15 because he wasn't mention in the synopsis or in the promo for it. That doesn't make sense because there were episodes where Aria wasn't mention or seen in the promo and he was still in the episode. So that's the only thing that's having me hold out hope that'll he'll be in 3x15. I don't even care who he would play as or even care if what he's playing as is connect to Hope or not. I just want him to be in because he loves Star Wars. And if he's not I will so mad at the writers for him and for doing that to him.

So I know that there are already people are mad that they saw Ethan and Lizzie kiss in the promo. But I think I could really get behind that if it was to ever happen for real. I think I would like them more that Mizzie.

There are still people who just don't seem to understand why Landon is acting a bit off. I mean come on this dude has PTSD. I literally saw someone say "Landon was only in the PW for like a week,the only way it would it make sense for that Landon to be that off is if time travel was involved and he was actually there for years." Time travel really? That would literally make no sense. So there's no doubt in my mind that the writers didn't go that way. But anyways what does it matter how long he was there. He was fighting for his life everyday. Probably didn't get much sleep or any because he could have been too scared to close his eyes(I could keep going but imma stop there). Not to mention that before he was in the PW he was in malivore for what felt like years to him even if in reality it was only like three week. And people still can't seem to understand why he's a bit off right now, honestly I can't. I'm just surprised he's not more of a mess right now. And I just think that just shows and proves how strong Landon actually is.

I'm really hoping at some point we'll get a flashback episode that shows us what happened to Landon in the PW. Or even a voice over type of thing of Hope reading the journal that Landon kept while he was there. Something is better than nothing right. But sadly I feel like we might not get that at all.

Yeah, just because he wasn’t in the synopsis or promo doesn’t mean he won’t be in the episode. He wasn’t supposed to be in 3x05 or 3x06 either and he was. They just didn’t mention he was because it would’ve spoiled it. So I’m really hoping that’s the case for 3x15. Right? He has to be in it! I don’t care how either, I just want it for Aria. I will also be so mad at the writers if he’s not. Can you imagine how Aria would feel if they excluded him from that? Like they literally made an episode based on one of his favorite things and to not let him be involved in it would be so beyond mean.

Are they? Idk, I’m kind of indifferent about other ships in the show tbh. I don’t think I’d mind seeing Lizzie and Ethan happen though. Yeah, I’m not really sure how I feel about Mizzie anymore, so maybe Lizzie and Ethan could be good if happens. I had wondered if that could have something to do with the “unexpected turn” in 3x16 with the whole rebound thing... they could be setting up something with Lizzie and Ethan, not just in the hallucination.

How can they not understand why Landon is acting different? Exactly, he has PTSD, he was stuck in Malivore and then the prison world, he’s traumatized. It’s really not the hard to grasp, but people would say awful things about Landon and his trauma before, so I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. But what?? Yeah, time travel makes no sense and it’s impossible for him to have been in the prison world for years. Time works the same way, it’s just the same day over and over again. And I don’t think he was there for a week. I thought it maybe could’ve been a few weeks. But exactly, it doesn’t matter even if it was a week or even less. He was still fighting to survive that whole time. He had to learn how to fight, was completely alone, and yes, I thought the same thing about him probably not getting much rest. And who knows how he ate, there’s just so many things he probably went through that we don’t even know about. And however long it was, it was all still traumatizing. And yes, he was in Malivore before, for who knows how long. But it still felt like years to him, which would be terrifying enough on its own, without adding his time in the prison world after. And then when he got back to the real world, he was still alone and isolated for weeks. People not being able to understand why he would be affected by all of that is baffling to me, not to mention disturbing tbh. And same, he’s doing amazingly well considering what he’s been through. I agree, that really does show even more how strong he is.

Oh me too. Besides a Handon reunion obviously, that’s what I want the very most for the rest of this season (or I guess including the start of season 4 now). Yes! I thought the same thing about the journal! And I’d love flashbacks as Hope is reading it. That would be ideal imo. But I’m worried we won’t get it at all either. I’ve wondered if they’re focusing more on the girls in this last episode and next episode, and then maybe the episodes after will be more Landon focused? So maybe it’s possible we’ll get something then? But I know I shouldn’t get my hopes up. It’s just so bizarre to me that they set up that whole storyline for him for half a season and then aren’t even gonna show what happened? And they went to all the effort of pinning Aria’s hair back for months just for like one shot? And had his hair longer for the posters without really showing him during the time he had longer hair? It makes absolutely no sense to me.