#john constantine

[ciricearts]

prompts from my instagram chat group!!<3

[atrophicgardenia]

i'm going to john constantine this one so hard.

Happy pride month to my dad. When I came out as bi to him, this man googled what it ment, look at me and said "ohh. Yeah. You get that from me. You'd have far more siblings of I only shaged women." And went right back to his work emails.

[mustasekittens]

putting him in a jar and shaking him violently

[ratblazer]

Zatanna projecting her period cramps onto Constantine

[superheroes-or-whatever]

Constantine in the DCAMU

[lazilyambitious23]

No because i don’t trust that that man won’t drink it himself.

I get back and my gin and tonic is gone? John is my last resort.

[muzzleguppy]

John Constantine was made to represent the common man. However he was later stripped of said humanity because comic writers couldn’t handle relating to a bi, mentally ill, homeless British guy.

I think a reason why many Hellblazer fans relate to John is because he IS them. Some Bloke who struggles. Who represents the average working class man. Friends struggling with addiction that consumes him like a monster. Ghost of past relationships that eats away at him and ruin his interpersonal relationship. Stigmatised mental health that makes it impossible for him to keep a job (an essay I am almost down btw) he’s so funny or relatable in a horror situation because he just wants to survive. A base urge all humanity can relate to. When he sees a monster he doesn’t go to slay it out of some heroism. He goes “fuck no” and sods off.

But.

Noticeably later writers chose to remove aspects about him that made him relatable. Kind. Like his love. Such a core feature of him removed and replaced with this overly cynical view of the world. I don’t think this was done out of malicious intent. While his character largely changes in newer comics to fit a narrative (and steal characters like Zatanna’s spotlight. Which is weird cus it kinda just feels like they wanted a man to take his role) I think it was instead new writers being uncomfortable about what he represents. How he was close to them. In an attempt to make John before “consumable” they villainised the very groups that read his comics.

Or something idk.

Consumerism killing the common man. Funny. Exactly what John protests about.

[dailydccomics]

Zatanna by Lee Bermejo

[atrophicgardenia]

i hate him and want him out of my head now.

[ecandjamesvpjournal]

John Constantine tries summoning the Ghost King’s warriors. Tucker, Sam, Jazz, Dani (who is also Princess) and the Ghostbusters of Amity Park suddenly appear.

JL/John: …

Danny’s Friends/GBs Of AP: …

Dr. Roberts, who was finishing something: Alright, now are we ready to kick bu-

Suddenly realizes where they’re at.

Dr. Roberts: What the hey-hiram is going on here?

Sees Constantine.

Constantine: Oh F**k.

Dr. Roberts: YOUUU MOTHERF**KER!! You no-good trickster magician. I oughta send you to the Nth Dimension just to give you an extra-dimensional wedgie for what you did. You absolute ignoramus!

Constantine: Oh, as if I didn’t mess up the last time! Remember that incident in New York?

Dr. Roberts: *Pauses to think* Which one?

Constantine: *akward* Y’know, the one involving the Other evil doctor? The dark magician?

Realization hits Dr. Roberts

Dr. Roberts: That wasn’t our fault if you’ll recall.

This argument goes on for a while while the Justice League, Danny “Ghost King” Phantom/Fenton, his friends and the GBs of Amity Park all watch the argument unfold.

Finally, Danny has to ask.

Danny: Uh, did you date Constantine Jimmy?

Both turn towards Danny.

Dr. Roberts: *long pause* Once. But that was long ago, and I do miss those times.

Constantine: Yeah, before you broke up with me.

Dr. Roberts: Wha-no. You broke up with me. At the pier on our first date.

Constantine: No, you did, and it was at my second favorite bar.

Dr. Roberts: *confusion intensifies* I don’t even know what’s your least favorite bar is. I only know where your favorite bar is at.

Jimmy thinks for a moment

Dr. Roberts: What did I drink?

Constantine: Wha-?

Dr. Roberts: Answer me John, what did I order?

Constantine: *thinks for a moment* Whiskey Sour

Shock crosses Dr. Jimmy Roberts face.

Dr. Roberts: At that Hour?! On our anniversary? John, I’m starting to believe that wasn’t you that broke up with me at the pier that night, because I know for sure that wasn’t me at the bar that night.

Realization hits Constantine’s face.

Danny: So, does that mean you’re still together or what?

Both look at his smug face as he eats dinner from the pot.

Dr. Roberts: You smug King of the Ghosts.

Danny: What can I say?

Constantine looks confused, as Jimmy explains.

Dr. Roberts: Danny recently and reluctantly took the role of Ghost King and was thus gifted different things, including powers given to him by Clockwork. He saw how we broke up, and saw that those that broke us up were human.

After that, who knows where it’ll go.

DPxDC #35

Ghost king gets summoned. Danny shows up wearing sweats and a loose t-shirt, holding a pot.

Danny: ...

JL/summoners: ...

Danny looks down and sees he's still holding his dinner.

Danny: Okay, less annoyed now, what's up?

Starts eating his dinner out of the pot with his serving spork. (Danny silently thankful his dinner came too. He hadn't eaten all day.)

JL and/or summoners are completely confused.

[colossrat]

Captain Marvel can't be a member of the Justice League because he has a LOT of shit to deal with in his first years as the champion of magic after so many centuries without one.

So when Superman asks this new hero, who only appears in Fawcett or in world-ending situations, if he wants to join him, he's met with a big, polite "Oh, no thanks."

But Captain Marvel and the League keep bumping into each other.

Zatanna does a spell that the League requested, and Marvel just "POFF" appears and says something like "Guys, I can't let you do this. It's a scale 12 spell, it could cause a rupture in the fabric of this universe. Here, let me redo this for you, sorry, I just need to make sure, okay?"

And someone says "YOU CAN'T DO THAT" and the magic users explain that, yes, yes he can. he is the new champion of magic and he is in fact responsible for keeping magic in its rightful place, making sure it doesn't go ruining the interdimensional worlds or universes, and that this IS his role in magical society and no one in that room can really take away his authority in matters related to magic. They can try, but the chances of success are very low.

So Captain Marvel takes care of it.

Like, are they on a mission to retrieve a magical artifact? Marvel will show up, grab it, and leave because he needs to put it in the rock so it doesn't cause more trouble.

Are they dealing with a cult that's probably going to summon a demon or something? Marvel will probably be there to banish the demon, close the portal, and reprimand Constantine, because why not?

The magical villain that Marvel saw the League having trouble with? Well, just a little finger shock should do the trick to help them take the villain away.

Got a problem with a God? Marvel is there.

Are the portals opening? Captain is in charge.

Have goblins invaded Gotham? Are fairies loose in Metropolis? Are there talking snowmen in Central City? No problem, Captain Marvel is ur guy.

After a while, JL is dying to have him on their team. Or at least let him keep a communicator in case they need to call for help. Because, well, this guy IS super powerful, a HUGE nerd about magical things, and it's MUCH better to have him on their side than not.

But he always refuses, because taking care of all the problems related to magic and Fawcett's stuff is already too much, hes just like 8-9 years old, give him a break.

Yeah but of course one day, after a long day, Superman goes back to Fawcett to ask about it for the thousandth time, and he's so tired of this subject that he just waves his hand and says: "Okay, okay, give me a year to make magical society at least more stable so they can keep going without me present all the time, then I'll go with you, okay?"

And Superman is beaming with happiness, he agrees, leaves, and Billy goes to sleep that night dead of exhaustion on his little couch on the rock of eternity, wondering HOW he's going to make magical society stable after CENTURIES of instability. in. one. year.

That's future billy problem tho, not billy of the present. that being said, time for the champion's nap

[jflkdhja]

What if they are friends

[wafflehousevibe]

“Pick another alleyway, mate.”

You’re interrupting their sneaky plotting 😒. Anyways, Constantine and Phantom!!! Here to bust ur ghosts!

[im-a-riot22]

Me in the DC tags on Tumblr and Ao3 lmao

[emptylotfiasco2]