#anyway this does imply damian has a charisma of 9

[breadandblankets]

Leaves crunch and twigs snap as Jason, lead foot and tired, stomps back to their little campsite with his bag of sad looking tatos, onions, and herbs.

(Herbs were the real hot commodity in the Commonwealth, the only people who still had em after the war were the Vaults. Well except for rosemary.... and mint. Like radroaches those weeds.)

Jason was about 75% certain that the lady at the market stand had upcharged him for his handsome mug.

Fucking assholes. This was why he didn't leave Goodneighbor for too long.

His charge was still where Jason had left him, sitting prim and proper in the makeshift camp Jason had set up before he left.

As he approached, Damian glanced up sharply, his hand outstretched with a piece of jerky no doubt stolen from Jason's pack. He was feeding it to a-

Jason stops in his tracks.

No fucking way.

"Brat that better not be what I think it is."

"I wasn't aware that you had enough brain cells left to think Todd."

"That's a fucking baby deathclaw."

Indeed it was, about the size of a medium dog with claws the same length as it's head. The little ball of tanky lizard destruction took Damian's distraction as an opportunity to snatch the jerky out of his hand.

"This is Humphrey, I hatched her myself."

".....What?"

"Hatched her, do keep up Todd."

"How long have you had her?" Jason tries to run the rough math on how long deathclaws incubate eggs for a runs into the brick wall that is the terror that Damian just stole a deathclaw egg from presumably a deathclaw mother.

The fact that Damian was anywhere near a position to be in the vicinity of a deathclaw mother meant Talia was going to kill him stone dead. For good this time.

"Three weeks," Damian reports in a clipped tone. He says this while petting the tiny creature that Jason has no doubt in his mind could rip them both to shreds in seconds.

Jason had lost more than a few traveling companions to the claws of a pissed lizard, they're the kind of animal that just gets mad when you shoot it.

But this was also Damian, the twerp had some sort of uncanny nack for getting the creepy crawlies of the Commonwealth to listen to him.

Fucking damnit.

"Fine, but you're explaining this to your mother."

"Acceptable," Damian sniffs, holding out a hand to shake.

Jason, despite himself, takes it.