#anyway this tooth issue from a couple years ago came back in force last week

[runawaymarbles]

separating dental insurance from normal medical coverage and making it fucking impossible to navigate is evil, actually

[saxxxology]

THE CURSED - Ch.12

Being an English Princess in 1739 is everything for Y/N, a Princess from a prosperous, powerful kingdom, to be happy about… until her parents arrange for her to marry a Prince from a nearby kingdom against her wishes. Unable to join her on her journey, the Royal family hires the Winchesters, two experienced Rangers, to guide her. However, the Princess and the younger brother begin to display affection for each other, and when her heat threatens her life, Sam makes a possibly deadly decision to save it.

PAIRING: Alpha!Sam x Omega!Reader

WORD COUNT: ~2100

OVERALL WARNINGS: a/b/o dynamics (heat/rut, claiming, knotting), age gap, smut of varying levels, descriptions of injury and gore, a tad of dub-con and 18th-century sexism from time to time, occasional bits of angst, fighting, and violence, eventual minor character death

NOTE: Edited by @crispychrissy and @quiddy-writes - please heed all warnings! Please keep in mind that this series is set in the 18th century - society is not what it is today. I do not control where your eyes go; if you feel disturbed or think something may trigger you, it is your responsibility to either stop reading or scroll past.

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The hound didn’t return that night either. Sam came back to the room in the early hours of the morning, angrily shaking his heavy cloak and jacket away before staring out the window. His eyes were red-rimmed, and Y/N wondered if he’d been crying.

“It didn’t work,” he finally mumbled, “we set livestock around the perimeter, men in the watchtower… the damned thing didn't come back. Could smell it though… must have been within a couple miles.”

“Have you thought about going out with a hunting party?”

Sam scoffed. “I remember what happened the last time I left my Omega alone…”

Y/N sighed and stroked his hair. “Well, if it’s getting closer, then maybe tonight’s the night.”

He closed his eyes and stroked the bare skin of her arm. “Maybe. I don’t feel like I’m going enough for them… I want to go home, put this all behind me.”

“Sam, you’re helping just by keeping watch all night,” she touched his cheek and tried her best to cradle him in his arms, “you’re not… blaming yourself for Hannah’s death, are you?”

His body trembled slightly at her words. “I feel that I should have seen it coming.”

“How could you have?”

“Because I killed this thing’s brother,” Sam’s voice grew thick, “and it wants revenge. I know how it feels to want revenge… which is why it wants to take you away from me.”

Y/N sat up. “I want to help you kill it, then.”

Sam sat up too and promptly shook his head. “I’ve already forbade you from doing so.”

“You’re not my husband, Sam. You may be my Alpha, but you have no authority over me, not that you would even if we were married.” Y/N retorted angrily. “Try and stop me from helping you, I dare you. You had a nightmare, Sam, it’s hurting you deeper than you think.”

Sam reached under the bed and grabbed the coil of rope he’d brought from their cabin. He held it up, shaking it in front of her face. “I bought this for a reason, Omega. You will listen to me or like I said earlier, I shall tie you to the bed and lock the door.”

Y/N folded her arms. “Do that and I won’t spread my legs for a month.”

“A month isn’t so long,” Sam smirked down at her and waved the rope. “And if you remember, Princess, I had years of being alone before I found you.”

She stuck her tongue out at him and tucked her wrists into her sides. “There’s nothing you can do that won’t stop me from helping you.”

Sam arched his eyebrows and tossed the rope to the floor. He crawled on top of her, pinning her wrists by her head. “I could simply make love to you until you’re too tired to move… I’ve done it before.”

Y/N shivered at the memory from the past winter; the week where they’d been in heat and rut simultaneously and Sam had taken her as if each time would be their last, mating her over and over until she lay trembling on their bed, unable to move or speak as pleasure radiated through her.

She struggled underneath him, fighting the urge to smile as he held her down. “And if I refuse?”

“Then I’ll allow you to,” he replied, dipping his head to kiss her, “but I’ll still tie you if you make any move to join us tonight and only let you out when it’s all over. I’d rather have you alive and angry with me than dead and happy I’d let you come along.”

“You could’ve just changed me two weeks ago when I asked and then me joining you wouldn’t be a problem.”

“I already said that I’m not ready to put you through the pain,” Sam growled, “I will keep you safe and human until I decide. Until then, I don’t want to hear any more of it. Do you understand?”

Y/N frowned up at him, but nodded anyways. “Yes.”

Sam cocked his head. “Yes… what?”

“I’m not going to say it.”

“You’re that angry with me?”

“Yes.”

Sam smiled down at her. She was so beautiful when she was angry, he couldn’t even find the capacity to care that he was the main target of her anger. “I still love you.”

“And I love you too, but I’m very unhappy with you.” She returned. “And I will torture you if you force me to stay behind.”

Sam groaned. “We have a plan already. I honestly don’t care if we have to stay in town for another week, I am not allowing you to put yourself in danger. And anyway, how could you possibly torture me? You’re half my size.”

Y/N bared her teeth, which only made Sam laugh before he pressed a soft kiss to her cheek and stood. “I already said I wouldn’t make love with you for a month. But me walking around with no clothes, swimming in the lake, lying out in the sun… you wouldn’t be able to keep your hands off me.”

Sam closed his eyes and tried to keep his cock from twitching in his pants. “And you’re probably right. But, if keeping my hands off my Omega for a month means she’s safe and alive, then it will have been worth it.”

He stood, brushing his pants off and watching as she closed her eyes, arms still folded. “Y/N.”

“What?” She frowned at him.

“You do know I’m not trying to be mean to you.”

She sat up and looked at him. “I know. You’re trying to protect me. I’m just being stubborn.”

Sam nodded. “I won’t let anything happen to you. If you’re going to—if you’re ever going to turn, and that’s a firm ‘if’—I refuse to allow an animal like a hellhound be the one to do it. It’s going to happen on my terms.”

***

That night was the last night the village of Dolgellau lived in fear.

Sam was perched on one of the wagons, bow loaded, sword heavy on his side. The night was frigid, and the stench of rotting fruit and wet dog was heavy in the air. Dean was by his side, and several men from the village were spread out in the courtyard, armed with blades and torches.

He had left Y/N asleep in their room, locking the door behind him and warning Father Michael not to let her out under any circumstances. He knew she’d be furious with him, but it was for the best.

“It’s close,” Sam breathed, “I can smell it…”

Dean sniffed the air and grimaced. “Don’t remember the one back home smellin’ nearly as bad.”

“Neither do I,” Sam replied. “It’s getting worse.”

Dean glanced at his brother. “I think I know why.”

Sam stared out into the line of trees. “Then enlighten me.”

“It smells Y/N.” Dean felt Sam stiffen next to him and exhaled slowly. “You’ve been cooped up with her all day long, she’s all over you. You stink.”

Sam roughly elbowed his brother in the side. “I could say the same for you. You’ve not bathed in days.”

“As have most of the people in the bloody town,” Dean took a long swallow from his hip flask, “you shouldn’t be such a prude about it.”

“I like to be clean,” Sam returned, “and so does Y/N.”

“Oh, she does like to keep you clean,” Dean scoffed, “making love in a church, I never thought you had the nerve.”

“It was one time.”

“Still counts.”

“Shush.”

“Sinner.”

“No, Dean, I mean it, shut up…”

The brothers fell silent. From the woods a low rumbling issued, followed by a wave of the same rotting stench they’d been smelling for over five hours. Sam turned and motioned for the men in the courtyard to gather together, back-to-back.

The snarling echoed again, closer, and Sam felt a chill run through his bones. Anger swelled in his chest, and he bristled at the thought of the vile creature lurking in the shadows, attempting to scout out a weak spot in their small group.

With a roar, the creature sprang, claws extended. The men shouted in surprise as it landed mere feet from them. Snarling, it swiped at them, sending three of them to the ground with howls of pain. Dean leapt back at the last second, swinging his sword at the hellound’s paw. The animal roared as the flat side of Dean’s blade stung its leg, and Sam nocked an arrow, then let it fly.

The shaft buried itself in the hound’s side, but Sam had missed his mark. The hound screeched in pain and backed away, haunches raised. The other men could barely see it, but Sam saw the thing in perfect detail, every wisp of matted fur, every tooth as his lips pulled back in a vicious snarl… it was just as big as Yellow Eyes had been, maybe fifteen-hundred pounds, and Sam knew exactly how much power lay behind just the animal’s bite.

Then, it lunged, throwing Sam to the ground. He hit the stone hard and felt his teeth bite into his tongue. For a second, he thought he heard Y/N screaming his name, and the animal paused mid-turn, its entire left side to Sam. He yanked an arrow from his quiver and jabbed it up, hard, heard the hound yelp in pain, and then he was on his feet. He pulled a torch from the wall and swung it fiercely, and the hot metal smacked right into the animal’s yellow eye.

Sparks and embers exploded everywhere. The resulting screech of pain was deafening. Sam actually had to cover his ears as the animal fell away, snarling and whining. He could have killed it right there, rammed his sword right through it, but he wanted to see it suffer, wanted to fight until the thing was begging to be put out of its misery.

His shoulder ached where it had been crushed beneath him, but he pushed himself to his feet and drew his sword, swinging it in the air as the hellhound stalked him in a circle. Dean raised his own blade and made to step forward, but Sam bared his teeth. “Stop!” he bellowed. “It’s mine! Don’t you lay a finger on it! It’s mine!”

He stalked in a circle, watching as the hound snarled and snapped ferociously at the air. Blood leaked from the gash on the side of its face, and it was limping slightly from when Dean had caught its front leg with his sword.

“Come at me, you bastard,” Sam growled, “if you’re going to hurt the people of this town, you’re going to have to kill me, and I’d like to see you try.”

The hound leapt, knocking Sam off his feet. He stumbled back, but kept his footing, swinging out with his sword. His bow was caught around his shoulder, and he angrily ripped it free, throwing it to the ground. With another snarl, the hound struck out again, and Sam matched the blow with his sword. Blood spurted, and the hound stumbled, a deep gash in his side. He brought his blade down again, but missed, and the hound knocked him to the ground. Pain shot from his shoulder down his arm, and he yelled as he felt the muscle strain, the joint popping loose.

He heard Y/N scream again, heard Dean shout to the other men to stay back. Blood roared in his ears as the hellhound reared back, jaws agape to deliver a bite that would surely kill its prey…

Sam struck up, his blade piercing the hound’s chest. It gave a loud, gurgling yelp of pain, and Sam sliced down. Warm, black blood and gore cascaded over him, and the hound fell to his side, twitched, and then stopped moving.

“Sam!” Dean was by his brother’s side immediately, scanning him for any major injuries. “Sam, are you hurt?”

The doors to the church crashed open, and both brothers looked up to see Y/N streaking towards them, her white nightdress trailing behind her, face wet with tears. Father Michael and several other priests followed, with villagers trailing behind, but all Sam could see was her.

“I’m all right,” he grunted and rolled onto his side, spitting blood from his mouth. His shoulder throbbed terribly, and the taste of the hound’s blood on his tongue caused nausea to roil in his stomach. “I’m all—”

He retched, emptying what little was in his stomach onto the pavement as Y/N collapsed by his head, not caring that her nightdress was slowly becoming soaked in the hellhound’s blood.

“Sam,” she cradled his head in her lap and stroked his hair away from his forehead, “Sam, I’m here… it’s over, love, it’s okay.”

The last thing Sam saw before the world went black was her tearstained face.

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TAGS FOR THIS SERIES ARE CLOSED

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[cyanidefilledcandy]

So....I started another text post trying to explain everything, but it’s just going on too long.

First of all, I want to say I’m sorry to everyone, but specifically people like @eene-fangirl, @glitterashley, and @solangeamiratennyson. People who have been messaging me with requests and projects and such that I haven’t gotten to at all. 

To make a long story short, my life is a complete shit show right now...

The biggest issue right now is about a month ago, I got what I thought was a toothache. It was out of nowhere, literally unbearable, and worst of all....CONSTANT. It didn’t stop or ease up at all...

I go to the dentist as soon as I possibly could, and they don’t find anything but recommend a root canal since they worked on the same tooth a year ago. I schedule an appointment and have to wait a full week. Not only that, but the payment for it was due THAT day since they were a “specialty” place and so they didn’t offer payment plan. Meanwhile, I’m still in unbearable and have no pain pills to speak of. I don’t know what the fuck is up with this state, but they are VERY strict about giving out pain meds... 

So, I’m forced to take over the counter meds....they do NOTHING. Anyone who knows me knows that I absolutely HATE pain meds....hate meds period, but I have to be close to killing myself in order to take pain meds. 

And there I was popping 20-40 a day! As some of you may know, pain pills are complete poison to your liver and kidneys if taken in high amounts...I knew that, but it was either that or be in unbearable pain....not that taking the pills was any better. I can feel them affect my body terribly from starving me to making me weak to making me pain and nausea so bad that I actually had to leave work multiple times because I literally couldn’t walk. Finally get the root canal done, but the pain doesn’t lessen and in fact feels like it’s getting worse. But, I try to soldier through it and continue working....failing miserably. I got sent home and had to call out repeatedly. Meanwhile, I’m popping pills at an alarming rate just for ANY type of relief and it’s slowly making me sicker and sicker.... And the pain is indeed getting worse, starting to radiate to other places on my face and up to my head to the point of triggering migraines, which I’d been having issues with regardless. It had gotten so bad to where most nights, I had shut off literally everything in my house (lights, fan, etc.) and just sit in the dark and the quiet because any type of sensation just seemed to amplify my symptoms. Also, my symptoms seemed to mysteriously elevate to 100 at nighttime...

After one night of nearly killing myself because they pain was just so intense, I called out of work of my own volition and called the dentist in for an emergency exam to see if I could get some pain pills (I had called him in before and he called in some antibiotics thinking it was an infection). As I mentioned before, this state is extremely strict about prescribing pain medication and he said the only way he could is if I had swelling. I did not....

But while I was there, he asked me to describe my symptoms. I did....and he said what I was describing was actually some kind of neurological condition and that I may need to see a neurologist to get to the bottom of it. He couldn’t prescribe me anything, but I was grateful for being pointed in the right direction...

However, I’m still literally careening at night, pulling my hair out, sobbing, trying my absolute best not to swallow a bottle of pills to get it to stop... However, I keep (somehow) convincing myself to give it another day....that things will be better tomorrow.... So, I once again go to an emergency medical clinic and I just straight up break down everything that’s been happening, damn near tears and the doctor can plainly see that I have not been having a good time, and suggest we get to the bottom of it as soon as possible. And I’m like “FINALLY! Someone gets it!” He writes me a referral to a neurologist and I call as soon as I can...

August. 

The first available appointment they have is in August. Like....god forbid I have a brain tumor or something. I’m sure it’ll be fine until August....

I call a different place, and they have an opening on July 18....not really any better, but fine. 

Meanwhile...I’m still fucking here. They gave me some shots at the medical center and it’s the ONLY thing that’s helped me so far, but like....what am I supposed to do when it wears off (btw, it has....only lasted about a day and a half). They did prescribe me some pain meds that I had to ask for, but it’s only a low dose and they only gave me 10....when I need 2 for it to have any effect...

Furthermore, because of this stuff, I had to take time off from work (couldn’t even work the full week in prep for it) and I’m pretty much out of vacation and personal time (I only get a week and two days). My rent is due Saturday and because of this stuff, I basically missed an entire week’s worth of work from both jobs and don’t have nearly enough... Furthermore, my car payment is a full month overdue because I spent it (plus some) on a root canal that I didn’t need...and the second payment is due. My lights have yet to be payed...and on top of all of this, the Department of Education has started garnishing my paycheck... There’s a form I can fill out for leave of absence at work so I can get paid, but 1) you have to be out at least two weeks, and 2) you have to get a doctor to sign off on it...

I was hoping to get the neurologist to do so, but I won’t see him for another month basically. I have a so called “primary care physician” who has literally stared at me the when I brought the migraines up to him at least twice before (once he literally asked me “what do you want me to do about it?”). So, I feel like I don’t have that option. I honestly can’t work, but....I also can’t afford not to, and I.... I just don’t know what to fucking do anymore guys...

Before all of this, I had planned to just quit my job and start over in Alabama with my friend. I was hoping to find a job first....even though a large part of me was terrified of that since I’m in no mental state to be trying to look for a new job anyway. I feel so dead... He even offered me a place to stay even if I WOULD be jobless for a while....and I honestly considered that as well, but...I’d like to have SOME money saved up (even just a couple hundred), so it’s not ALL on him... Though, I must admit....I came VERY close to just packing my shit and leaving because....I just CAN’T anymore. And I know that sounds like a lazy cop-out, but....it’s true. I just can’t right now...

I planned on maybe saving a couple hundred, and just leaving and finding work once I got there and had time to collect myself (I thought a big part was that I was so overworked from working 65+ hours at 2 jobs with no sleep...), but then all this shit with my health started and.....I just don’t fucking know...

I still want to just leave (honestly, I feel like I should’ve left a LONG time ago...), but my health insurance is through my job, and I can’t just....go on with these issues.  I just don’t know...

And between this literally unbearable pain, the bullshit life keeps throwing at me, and just...feeling dead anyway, I just want to just....end it. 

I’m so tired of it all. I’m so tired of pushing through. I’m so tired of fighting to live when I honestly don’t even feel alive anymore. When I have no goals. No dreams. No pleasure. No joys. Like....all of that has been sucked out of me to the point where literally nothing elicits any type of emotion for me. Where I can’t get excited about anything anymore. Like....what’s the fucking point?

....but I went off on a tangent. Sorry. I just kinda wanted to let you guys know why I haven’t been around...and why I’ve been so inactive.

All I can say is I’m sorry. I’d like to get back to that point again, but not sure I can....