#anyways i just listen to wait for it when im sad lmao

[todayisafridaynight]

Literally will sit and rewatch the episode of Super Salaryman the first photo is a production image from just to see Tsutsumi's character super excited to see the monkeys <3 love him dearly and the show as a whole big serotonin boost <3 also less Hostage Situation shot of the second one

AND OKAY I WOULD'VE TOLD YOU ABOUT RASEN IF I KNEW YOU LIKED ADO THE SONG S L A P S AND SO DOES THE INTRO SEQUENCE IN GENERAL

One Google Search Later how could you not tell me bout this show sooner the premise sounds so fuckin cute hold ONNNN 😭😭

OH BUT YEAH MY ADO FANATICISM WASNT EVER MADE PUBLIC IG LMAO yeah i love her :)) the intro IS mundo cool (;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`)(;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`)

[joviepog]

EEE HI JOVIE again i love love your writing and im so glad youve been enjoying my stuff!! anyway, sweet and simple request-- wilbur and reader having an at home dinner night :)) (if u wanna make it silly tommy could be their "waiter" LMAO)

much love !!

EEK I LOVEE THIS IDEA! ITS SO SIMPLE BUT SO GOOD AHHHHHH

-♡-♡-♡-♡-♡-♡-♡-♡-♡—♡-♡-♡-♡-

Lovely night

Who: Wilbur x f!reader

Warnings: i dont think there is anything but if there is just let me know!

Pronouns: She / they

Word count: I have no clue

Requests: @poraphia

Anything’s else: I actually liked how this turned out! thanks for the idea lovely requester!

This story is NOT proofread

Listen to this while you read! <3

Both you and Wilbur aren’t the richest people around. For you, this was absolutely fine. But for Wilbur?

Well, Wilbur is just a bit disappointed about not being able to spoil you as much as he wants. Since you both have met, he’s been obsessed with getting you little gifts and taking you to cute dates. But what he really wants to do is to be able to take you to the fancy restaurant down the street from your guy’s apartment.

He’s told you about this little problem of his and you cant help but giggle every time he mentions it. The conversation always ends with a kiss on the cheek and the same six words. “Wil, i dont need all that!” But lately he wont stop talking about it. He’s been daydreaming about you in a fancy dress and him in a fancy tux. Not the old cheep one he has for all those dumb occasions. No, he wants to be able to give you a bouquet of roses and a ring that means forever. But most of all, he wants to make you happy.

You’ve noticed that this was starting to get to him. Every time you got home he would give you a kiss and a hug -per usual- then he would start talking about this dress he saw on twitter and how beautiful it would look on you. “And that dress would be perfect for that restaurant!” And every time you say that you dont need all that, he looks like a kid being rejected of a puppy.

And so, you set up a plan. While he was gone on tour, you saved up, took cooking classes, and learned how to do your best makeup possible. You called him up one night, “Hi Wil! Are you busy?” There was a slight pause and he spoke quietly, “No, i just have to be quiet.” You gave a soft laugh and spoke quietly. “I just wanted to make sure i have the right day for when your coming back.” He raised an eyebrow and smirked, “Why?” You pouted, “Why? What, I can’t miss my boyfriend?”

He apologized at least 100 times before he woke Joe up. You said hi to Joe and hung up. “I love you Wil. See you soon?” You asked with a smile. “See you soon.” You hung up and silence fell on the room. You had 1 more week. You bought the dress he had mentioned 1,000 times, you made sure Tommy was free, and you made sure the house was clean. You were ready.

-♡-♡-♡-♡-♡-♡-♡-♡-♡-♡-

“I’m two hours away.” he spoke and you could hear the boys in the back teasing him.

you fake sighed, “I guess i’ll just wait here. all alone, and sad, and-“

he stopped you, “Yeah i’ll try to hurry up.”

“No take your time, darling.”

he sighed, “All i want to do is get home and hug you.”

“Aweeee.” you put another fake eyelash on, “I miss you too baby.”

“Wilbur! The taxy is here!”

you laughed and he scoffed, “I’ll see you soon darling.”

“See you soon.” you hung up and looked at yourself in the mirror. you looked amazing. you hair was fixed, and the dress fit nicely just like wilbur said it would. everything was perfect.

2 hours: Tommy got there with a suit and a tie that was ties badly

1 hour 30 minutes: You and tommy set the table and clean the house. you fail to figure out how to tie tommy’s tie

1 hour: you start dinner and Tommy calls phil to help him tie his tie.

30 mins: you finish up dinner and you get out wilbur’s favorite wine

20 mins: you double check everything for 10 minutes

10 mins: you wake up Tommy from his nap and cehck to make sure you look good.

5 mins: you triple check that you look okay and you serve the food.

1 minute: You light the candles

0 mins: You hear a knock.

“Is that him?!?” you say with a cheerful smile. Tommy smiles, “No it’s the mailman.” he jokes. you roll your eyes and open the door. Wilbur has the biggest smile on his face and he’s holding flowers. You close the door behind you, not wanting to ruin the surprise, and jump into his arms. he gives you small kisses all around your face and neck; your giggling at his touch. he finally lets you go and you were so excited to see his reaction.

His eyes widen at the sight of you in the dress and he begins to ask questions. “YN? Where did you-“ you stopped him and grabbed his arm, interlocking your arm in his. you yelled out to tommy, “Ready!” tommy opens the door and the smell of delicious food swept through the door.

The sight of warm lighting and wine glasses were shows on the small table. Warm jazz music was playing and you couldn’t help but giggle at the sight of Wilbur. His mouth was agape and his eyes completely widened. He turned to look at Tommy, who had his hair slicked back and a napkin on his arm (still holding the door open he cleared his throat.) “Welcome Mr. Gold and Ms. LN. I have your table ready right over there. He nudged his head towards the table and you and Wilbur walked in. Tommy quickly close the door and pulled out the chairs for both you and Wilbur.

Wilbur sat down, still in shock, and looked at his plate. Tommy spoke up, “You see, we already served you food because your girlfriend here, preordered. Wilbur laughed and Tommy grabbed the wine glass. “Tell me when to stop.” He started to pour the wine and Wilbur told him to stop about halfway, you did the same.

“Anything else?” Tommy asked.

“That’ll be all. Thank you.” Tommy winked at you and nodded his head. As he walked away you turned back to Wilbur. “So?” His mouth is still slightly open but soon enough, his cheeky smile appeared back on his face.

“Well, i feel like I’m a bit underdressed.” You both laughed and spent the rest of the night talking while Tommy took photos of both of you.

What a lovely night.

[fullsunised]

hii first of all i really really love💛 your fics, its such an easy read. i was wondering could you write dreamies when they want to be babyied(? like maybe they want to sit on your lap)

ɴᴄᴛ ᴅʀᴇᴀᴍ¹⁵: ᴡᴀɴᴛɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇ ʙᴀʙʏɪᴇᴅ

➶-͙˚ ༘✶ genre: fluff

➶-͙˚ ༘✶ trigger warnings: none for the first time ( oh, swear words )

➶-͙˚ ༘✶ requests open

➶-͙˚ ༘✶ a/n: thank you for thr request and the love means a lot. hopefully this is what you wanted. keep loving my work </33. smth is wrong with this.

┊ ➶ ｡˚ ° ✧. ┊  ❝ 𝗠𝗔𝗥𝗞 𝗟𝗘𝗘 ❞

he's just gonna pout. him pouting is a rare occasion, which is why he knows that's your bare weakness. is gonna sit on the corner of the couch, with the cutest pout on his face. if you were busy with schedules, you'd ruffle his hair but if you aren't, he's pulling you down onto the couch with him.

rests his head on your lap, and loves it when you play with his hair. man just melts into your arms when you do that. isn't very vocal about what he wants because he knows you'd understand him.

you'll be playing soft music in the background, his head on your lap, your hands in his hair, and boy is trying his best not to shut his eyes and drift of to sleep CAUSE HE NEEDS IT SO MUCH.

┊ ➶ ｡˚ ° ✧. ┊  ❝ 𝗥𝗘𝗡𝗝𝗨𝗡 𝗛𝗨𝗔𝗡𝗚 ❞

grabby hands? man he's the cutest lil thing ever, stop. anyways, he's just on the couch, with his hands stretched into the air asking you to hold him. he's like a little baby. more than being word vocal, he's whiny.

probably gets irritated by every little thing, and that's when you know he's wanting some pampering? loves sitting on your lap, even if you are smaller than him, specially like sits on your lap, his head against your chest, a bowl of popcorn in his lap, and you are binging films.

run your bloody fingers through his hair pls, who doesn't like that honestly. PURRS LIKE A FUCKING CAT. best part fr. loves sitting on your lap just in all, and watching you do your everyday tasks.

┊ ➶ ｡˚ ° ✧. ┊  ❝ 𝗝𝗘𝗡𝗢 𝗟𝗘𝗘 ❞

more of a snuggler type. is gonna let you sit on his lap, cup his cheeks and kiss his face. or you two are laying across the bed, legs all tangled, his head resting on your chest, breathing evenly against his soft skin and you know he's loving life very then.

doesn't really ask you to baby him, just happens considering how in a week he's taking care of you for five days, the two are yours to go ;)) loves watching movies with his head on your lap, or with his head on your chest, his hand tucked under your's.

lmao, deffo will slide into your shirt and just stay there. prefers being on your chest more than your lap, because he loves listening to your heartbeat. loves it when you just dedicate a whole day just for him, cooking, baking and just having fun.

┊ ➶ ｡˚ ° ✧. ┊  ❝ 𝗛𝗔𝗘𝗖𝗛𝗔𝗡 𝗟𝗘𝗘 ❞

legit a koala. ( love him sm). boy is clinging all the time, doesn't even let go even if you have to go to the toilet. doesn't even let you go see your manager or some like that for world related shit. if he decides to be the baby that day, you better stop every activity in the world for him.

bro is just gonna plop onto your lap, wrap his legs and arms around your waist, and rest his head in the crook of your neck (so cute, I'm gonna cry). loves smelling that perfume he got for you, LOVES IT EVEN MORE WHEN YOU ARE JUST THERE TO ATTEND TO ALL HIS NEEDS.

give him them extra little kisses, pecks and snuggles all over his face and body. tell him how much you appreciate him, whisper comforting nothings into his ear. (BRO IM GONNA CRY) just tell him you are there if he ever wants to rest and boy is planning to marry you (this ring finger is waiting for you bbg).

┊ ➶ ｡˚ ° ✧. ┊  ❝ 𝗝𝗔𝗘𝗠𝗜𝗡 𝗡𝗔 ❞

pouts. that's all. ONG HES GONNA DO THAT BABY TALK MATE. might as well start talking in third person. 'nAnA iS sAd'. does that unconsciously, so you definetly understand him before he pulls shit like this. babying him is your unconscious practise.

but bro does he love it when you baby talk him, make his hair, do his makeup, apply his lip balm, basically make sure he doesn't lift a finger. also the type to snuggle into the crook of your neck. loves you cupping his cheeks and bombarding him with kisses.

ahh, man has these days atleast thrice a week, so prepare- how did I forget, loves it when you do his skincare. just that masks, and creams and shit.

┊ ➶ ｡˚ ° ✧. ┊  ❝ 𝗖𝗛𝗘𝗡𝗟𝗘 𝗭𝗛𝗢𝗡𝗚 ❞

his eyes are droopy, when he pushes you onto your bed, jumping onto your figure, with his whole body weight and no you can't whine about how heavy he feels because all he wants to do is to rest in your arms.

massaging his back and shit while he sleeps really does help ease everything. is a sucker for you washing his hair, just all that care you put into doing his hair before bed, bro adores you honestly. that's the only way he accepts himself to be babied.

also, the type to expect you to drop everything as soon as he calls, cause trust he would do that for you. and you do, so in the end, boy is resting on you slightly snoring while your fingers are pressed against his bare back.

┊ ➶ ｡˚ ° ✧. ┊  ❝ 𝗝𝗜𝗦𝗨𝗡𝗚 𝗣𝗔𝗥𝗞 ❞

embarrassed. but guess when you get really really close, he's being a tall baby all the time. there isn't a time where you don't baby him, even while your normal lifing, but when he needs like extra extra attention and care, he's giving you them puppy eyes.

literally pushes you onto the couch, rests his head on your lap and makes sure you are not moving for the next five hours or so. he's gonna do all that and then apologise for your sore legs. anyways, just loves listening to you talk, your voice is his favourite comfort.

would prefer baby talk but he'd rather avoid it cause his members do that all the time. just needs you to tell him he's doing great and shit cause bro he needs it. like so bad. in general, just the type to lay on your legs or tummy, while you play with his fingers. you get me.

©️FULLSUNISED.

[zyonsay]

hi z!!

could you please do a lando request??

the reader is afab and they’re pronouns are they/he and maybe he (the reader) is just having a bad day because, first of all they just woke up in a crappy mood because they’re feeling dysphoric (and i know i get cranky like hell when this happens) and then they see hate comments like purposely misgendering the reader in lando’s comment section!!

and then lando both kinda goes off on twitter about it, while comforting reader just talking about how he’s the best boyfriend/partner

(that’s all i have take it from here😭😭)

btw you’re one of the few writers that i know off that do male!readers

OH and i saw how it said to say if the afab/amab is a big thing, so YES him being a afab is a big deal to the story!!

LOVE YOU POOKIE💗💗

Love you, no matter what LN4

Fem aligned people may read but not f3tishize my work!!

Summary: Dysphoria sucks ass

Warnings: Queerphobia, Slurs: Tr@nny/f@g

Now playing: 'Blonde Chaya sped up' by Amaru & Gringo Bamba

AN: Hey there pookie! Thank you so much for this request!! I also get cranky asf when im dysphoric. ok well admittedly, im always cranky . But anyways! I made some teeny tiny changes and i hope that's alright! Love you!

Fun Fact of the day: My biology teacher is a skinwalker

(i'll rage if there isn't a brit shaped present under the tree by the 24th)

A loud, irritated groan left your figure as you fought with nothing in particular. That was a lie. You fought with yourself right now.

The t shirt clung to your figure because of the cold sweat you woke up in and your hair was an absolute mess. The spot next to you on the bed was empty, you knew that your most loved one was probably on a stream.

Scrambling from the bed you passed the long mirror on the bedroom wall; another irritated huff left you. That feeling of being trapped in the wrong body snaked up your leg and pierced you right in your heart. Maybe a cup of hot tea or coffee will cheer you up.

You passed the office, hearing a loud groan from withing, followed by your boyfriend’s voice, explaining how unfair it was for him to get shot ten seconds after joining the game.

The water boiler hummed loudly as you sat on the barstool by the kitchen island, slumped over like a sad little bag of potatoes. You also felt like one. Yet another groan erupted from the office, making you think of something. Quickly fetching your phone from the pockets of your shorts, you opened Whatsapp and sent Lando a quick text. It was almost comical how you could hear him talk to his audience about you.

“My lovely boyfriend just asked if I wanted some tea!”, he giggled like a giddy child. Brits and their tea. He sent you a text back, telling you he’ll be in the kitchen in a few minutes, he just wanted to wrap the stream up.

Then his eyes landed on a username consisting of various numbers and letters. ‘Ew bro, you still dating that f@g? Thought u moved on lolz’ The blood in his veins froze and he felt the anger boiling in the pit of his stomach. Another one popped up, this time from a different viewer. ‘OMG WAIT is it that Tr@nny he once showed lmao, Lan you can do better smh’ And with that a stream of vile words erupted as the strangers on the other side of the screen began vomiting senseless hate. ‘No fucking way. I bet y’all a million bucks that I’d be a less embarrassing wag lol’

What he had missed in this mess of hate comments was that ‘y/n.02’ had joined the stream and saw the hateful words through teary eyes. You clutched your phone with a desperate grip as you sobbed.

“Y’all need to fucking grow up and accept it. I love my boyfriend.” was all he said before swiftly clicking ‘end stream’ and rushing out of the office. He found you with glistening tears streaming down your face and a red, sniffling nose. Immediately, Lando threw his arms around you, pulling you up from the barstool and into a tight hug. “Don’t listen to them darling”, his voice was sweet and almost as quiet as the breath you let out after that. His T shirt was soaked with your tears, but he couldn’t care less. “I love you so fucking much. And nothing can change that. You’re the best damn thing that happened to me.”, his big, gentle hands rubbed your back and traced patterns over your t shirt.

Lando pulled away and looked you intently in the eyes. He closed the distance between you two and embraced you in a sweet, loving kiss.

“Let’s drink some tea baby.”, Brits and their fucking tea.

[mp3chan]

plz reblog/follow if u enjoy!

pairing: chan x afab!reader (no pronouns used)

tw: praise kink, chan is bi in this, reader has a bad gag reflex lmao, MINORS DNI

wc: 1.3k lord have mercy

an: this honestly was not the direction i wanted to take this prompt and i got writer blocked like 3 times writing this but i like it anyway???

-> kinkmas 22’ masterlist!

© copyright mp3chan 2022 (don’t repost, steal, or translate!)

chan loved praise, you figured this out pretty quickly into your relationship. chan would melt into you if you held him tight and told him how he’s such a good boyfriend and leader, how you’re so proud of him, etc etc.

while chan loved praise, you didn’t react to it really, no matter how much chan tried to praise you as well.

he would constantly tell you how pretty and smart you are, how you’re such a hard worker and how he doesn’t deserve you. but it doesn’t make you melt like it does with him. you did appreciate it and loved it, but you didn’t react like chan did.

until now.

chan was relaxed back into the couch, one hand caressing your face and the other holding his cock up so you could suck him off.

you had a terrible gag reflex and were hellbent on taking as much of chan’s, seemingly monster, cock in your mouth as you could.

“baby.” chan chuckled, looking down at you amused, despite how debauched you looked with spit trailing down your chin and trails of tears on your cheeks.

you paused, panting, looking up at him immediately. you felt like you couldn’t pleasure him properly in this aspect, especially when you overhear his members talk about how good their partners are at giving head.

“we can do something else.” chan suggested, not expecting you sigh heavily and lean your head on his thigh in defeat. normally you would be so horny you’d agree with no hesitation.

“i just wanna pleasure you like that.” you admitted, looking up at him with those sad puppy eyes of yours.

chan was torn, he didn’t want to hurt you or anything, but he wanted to make you happy. “ok how about you let me guide you…yeah?” chan suggested, not really sure how he’d be able to help with this, considering he only ever got close to sucking a dick himself once but ended up chickening out last minute.

“ok…” you whispered, still feeling incredibly defeated and a little embarrassed.

“i got you baby.” chan reassured you with a gentle caress on your cheek. “now open your mouth and try to keep your tongue down ok?” he instructed you, watching you follow his commands and open your mouth like he asked.

“im gonna put my tip in, don’t close your mouth yet.” you kept your mouth open as chan pushed his cock ever so slightly into your mouth.

you could taste the pre cum on his tip and you had to restrain yourself from wanting to just start sucking him off desperately again.

“now close your mouth and relax, don’t suck.” chan was getting distracted by how you quickly obeyed him and how pretty you looked doing it. “i want you to relax your throat and breathe through your nose, baby.” chan watched you listen to him once more, all while he inched his cock just a little further into your mouth.

you kept your gaze on chan’s face, watching him stare at your mouth and you were waiting for another instruction as you patiently breathed in and out of your nose like he asked.

“baby…fuck” chan groaned, having slowly pushed his cock almost all the way inside your mouth by this point. he wanted to tell you you were almost deep throating him for the first time, wanted to praise you.

“doing so good baby….taking my cock so well.” chan managed to choke out as his pelvis touched your lips. he could hardly think, your mouth was so warm and wet and you looked so cute on your knees for him.

you only realized how far you had gotten when you reached his pelvis, so close the shaven stubble on his crotch tickled your nose. you went wide eyed and wanted to gasp but you just inhaled deeply through your nose like chan said.

you could feel your gag reflex being tickled ever so slightly as you looked up at chan. you weren’t really sure what the difference was, nor could you really think.

chan looked like he was having a hard time controlling himself at this point, when you were trying so hard it amused him. but now with his cock completely inside your mouth, he was gonna lose it. chan was trying so hard not to not thrust his cock in and out of your mouth.

“doing so good baby.,” chan groaned, the hand that wasn’t digging into the couch reaching up into your hair.

you could physically feel your cheeks go red at chan’s praise and you moaned around his cock, not expecting chan to buck his hips up.

you weren’t ready for that sudden movement and you choked around his shaft, quickly remembering how chan told you to breathe through your nose.

“that’s my good baby…following my directions so well, swallowing my cock just like i asked.” chan was still struggling to keep himself still, not wanting to make you choke or anything.

you looked so wrecked. your lips stretched wide around his shaft, cheeks still stained with tears, and innocent looking eyes staring right up at him, silently begging for praise.

“you listened so well, love. you got it all in this time.” chan smiled down at you, wanting to chuckle when he felt your hands grip tightly at his leg.

“you wanna keep being good?” he asked you, his smile turning into a grin when you nodded eagerly with his cock still in your mouth.

“alright baby. slowly start bobbing your head and suck ok? remember what i already told you.” chan instructed you, waiting for his words to actually process in your head.

it took you a second, for some reason some things sound like nonsense to you right now. you can only think of chan and how full your mouth feels, and how much you like that.

you slowly pulled your head back, feeling chan’s cock move inside your mouth, and then push back down, gently sucking as you did so.

“fuck.” chan cursed, head falling back on the couch cushion behind him, pretty much forgetting about leading you.

you swallowed around chan’s cock, your tongue moving against his shaft. your eyes went wide as chan tangled his fingers into your hair and pulled gently.

“just like that baby….so good…” chan panted, the pleasure of having his cock fully in your mouth just now setting in for him, as he was too concentrated on guiding you.

you moaned around his cock, your hips trying to rub against chan’s leg for some form of friction. you continued slowly bobbing your head up and down his shaft, not fully ready to go any faster, and licking at his cock as much as you could.

“my baby is such a fast learner…” chan rambled mindlessly. “such a good baby for me….only for me.” his cock was throbbing in your mouth at this point.

your hips were moving on their own at this point, trying to get some form of pleasure. you squeezed chan’s thighs, trying to silently tell him he could cum in your mouth. you didn’t wanna pull off and mess up all of your progress.

“so good….so good for me.” chan moaned loudly, somehow getting the hint and gripping your hair just a little tighter. “f-fuck!” chan was gasping and his release was gushing into your mouth. you struggled trying not to gag as you swallowed around him.

you waited patiently as chan came down from his high, only pulling off when he tapped your cheek. you slowly pulled away and tried your best not to cough, but failed.

“you did so well baby.” chan smiled down at you, gently pulling you up to stand in front of him, really noticing you blush at his praise finally. “i think you deserve a reward yeah?” his voice sounded sweet but his eyes were dark.

[yunalinwrites]

kids on christmas eve | gojo satoru x reader

available on wattpad

cover by me

summary: you learn about what happened with geto suguru and make him talk to you about it

about reader: gender neutral, relationship to gojo is unclear but they're close, on a first name basis + implied to be romantic

warnings: sad (if i did my job right), mild cursing, spoilers for jjk 0 + gojo's past/hidden inventory/star plasma vessel arc

notes: i know this is really out of season bc christmas has long passed but its for the plot lol as u prob know dec 24th is an important date

anyways i prob could've edited more but tbh i just wanted to post it already lmao hope its not cringe cuz i didn't shower to finish it (avg jjk degenerate) also im angry this was correctly formatted in google docs but tumblr ruined it and i cant b bothered to reread it under the new formatting so srry if theres smth wrong

"Gojo-sensei, that's not fair!"

Itadori had his bottom lip stuck out, his arms crossed tightly and his feet stomping against the snow.

"Yeah, come on!" Kugisaki agreed, mitten-clad hands full of the cold ammunition. "Turn it off, will you?"

You looked over to where Satoru stood. The snowballs that floated around him made it a little hard to see, but you could still tell his face was like it always was: smiling, the only deviation from its usual state being the pink on his pale nose. The rosy shade was just like his tongue when he stuck it out. 

"Come and make me," he taunted.

"Why, you little..." Kugisaki grumbled. "Okay, Itadori, Formation B!"

"Roger!" Itadori yelled back.

The pair performed a number of flashy poses--as if they were trying to imitate something they'd seen in a cartoon--and before you knew it, they were charging at Satoru from two sides, arms fully loaded and wound back with mounds of snow. But it seemed Satoru knew it before you, because he just tsked--didn't even bother catching the snowballs, just let them fall apart against his forcefield.

"Gojo-sensei!" the two groaned in unison.

"You're no fun!" Itadori complained.

"It's not supposed to be fun," Satoru countered with a playful shrug. "Just because it's a snow day doesn't mean you can stop training."

"But... but... But what about...!" Kugisaki sputtered, a vein popping out of her forehead as she struggled to come up with an argument. You could almost see the lightbulb pop up above her head as she pounded her fist in her palm. "But what about global warming?"

"Yeah!" Itadori followed, not thinking. "What about--Wait, what?" Scratching his head, he tilted his head at Kugisaki.

"It could totally be the last day it ever snows, you know," she claimed matter-of-factly, her hands on her hips. "And I would so hate you forever."

Itadori's mouth formed a silent "Oh!" as Kugisaki elaborated. Nodding his head in accord, he added on: "Yeah, Gojo-sensei. I don't think I could respect you after that."

Satoru put on a dramatic pout at that last sentence, but he soon returned to a smile and gave in with a sigh. "Alright, just this once."

You could see the two students loudly jumping for joy from behind him as he made his way towards where you were sitting. You smiled warmly at the sight.

"They really are something," you commented.

"Tell me about it," Fushiguro grumbled, leaning boredly against the wooden armrest of the park bench. He observed quietly as his friends built a snowman in the distance until Satoru's towering shadow prompted him to look up.

"Megumi!" Satoru called, his voice high-pitched and sing-song. "Go play with the others."

The boy scowled in response. "I'm too old for that stuff."

"You think you're old?" Satoru challenged. He pointed at his hair, at the white color it's always been. "What does that make me?" He hunched over and put his hand on his lower spine, feigning back pain. "C'mon, listen to your teacher. Let me sit next to Y/N."

Fushiguro squinted at him for a moment before finally getting up."Gross."

You chuckled, watching the boy begrudgingly drag his feet through the snow towards his classmates, but your laughter hitched as you felt something push against you. Turning to your right, you saw his lanky teacher. At first the sensation didn’t make sense, considering that there was a considerable amount of distance between the two of you, but you soon recalled his defense measures and the complaints they had garnered. 

Not noticing your discomfort, he stared up at the cloudy sky for a moment before turning to you. 

"Are you cold?" he asked.

You shook your head. "I should be asking you," you replied, referencing his lack of winter wear. "Why didn't you wear a coat?"

"Well, it would ruin my outfit, of course," he stated perkily. He wore a confident smirk on his face, but looking closer you could tell he was shivering beneath the thin fabric of his uniform.

Taking a deep breath in disapproval, you reached for your scarf. "Here," you offered, unraveling the knot you’d made earlier. But when you reached to wrap it around his neck, you felt the resistance of his invisible force.

His smile eased. "It's okay," he obliged, sniffling. "Thank you, though."

You hesitated before tying your scarf back around yourself, the garment's chunky knit giving it enough volume to nearly cover your mouth and even your ears, but you could still hear his teeth chatter. You searched your surroundings, looking past the dead snow-adorned trees and following the wet pavement until you spotted something in the distance: a cafe, just down the street from where you were.

"I'll get you some hot chocolate," you decided, standing up and brushing the snowflakes off your coat.

"You don't--"

"Shh!" You pointed your finger threateningly at him before turning around to begin your walk. "Somehow you've bent logic so far that you'll end up sick if you don't drink it. So just take this as an excuse to have more sweets, alright?"

You were just about to make your first step away from the bench, but then you felt a firm grip wrap around your arm. "Wait, Y/N--"

Before he could finish his protest, he was cut off by a particularly firmly packed snowball striking him right in the middle of his face, highlighting his nose with the sparkling white powder and dislodging his blindfold. With his cerulean eyes now exposed, he turned his head and saw the three of them: Itadori pointing and cackling on the left, Kugisaki doing the same keeled over in the middle, and even Fushiguro, on the right, had the ends of his mouth perked up as he shook his head hopelessly.

You saw Satoru grin at the picture, but it was contradictory to what you were feeling. He had let go of your arm, but not by relaxing his hand--you felt him, as if brick by brick, build that invisible wall right back up between you, seemingly stronger than ever. You could still feel it, even as he walked away towards the trio, tying his blindfold back on. Sighing, you sat back down and watched him make snow angels with the others, his head blending right in with the scene as he drowned himself in the blinding whiteness. With his blindfold now fully on, you could only imagine what it was like when he smiled with his eyes.

***

"I can't feel my toes."

Twirling her brown hair between her fingers, Shoko spun around in her chair to face the doorway.

She darted her eyes between you and Satoru for a second before a calm, amused expression painted her face. Despite knowing it was his voice she heard--though it was more nasal than usual--she directed her question at you: "To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"I told him to wear thicker socks!" you exclaimed, your arms crossed in frustration. "But look! Show her."

Rolling his eyes behind his blindfold, Satoru pulled the fabric on his thighs, lifting the hems of his pants so that they revealed his ankles. They were barely covered by the cheap red and green striped polyester; it was the kind of thing you'd spot on sale in packs at the checkouts during Christmas season.

“So I forgot… Big deal!”

“I could fill a library with all the things you forgot,’” you complained. “I mean, what are you, a fish?”

Unfazed, Shoko chuckled. "You're telling me the strongest--the one powerful enough to rival the King of Curses--was defeated by a case of frostbite?"

The both of you responded simultaneously: "Exactly." "No!"

"I was not defeated," he insisted, earning a glare from you. "Barely a scratch. She's just being dramatic."

"I am not--"

"Is there a reason you can't heal yourself?" Shoko interrupted, now turned to Satoru.

He pointed his thumb in your direction accusingly. "She wanted to come here, not me."

"Wait," you interjected. "You can heal yourself?”

“Of course, duh.”

“Since when?"

"High school," he answered dismissively, wiping his nose with his sleeve. "See, look!"

He pointed down to his shoes--through the leather of his dress boots, you could see the movement of his wriggling toes. 

You held your hands up to hide his feet from your sight. “Ew, stop that--" you grimaced. "Why didn't you tell me?"

He shrugged, smirking smugly. "My talent should go without saying."

You sighed. “Your talent to bewilder me?”

"You know it,” he asserted proudly. "But anyways–Can I go now?"

Before you could even answer, you could sense him already moving in your peripheral vision.

"Satoru, wait--"

"If you don't believe I'm fine, I'll show you my toes," he threatened, halfway out the door.

"Satoru--!"

"Go on, catch me if you can!"

You listened, trying to grab onto him but, once again, his Infinity blocked you, making you stumble into Shoko's arms as it pushed you backwards. By the time you regained your balance and rushed into the hallway, his long strides and newly healed feet had already carried him beyond your sight.

You sighed and re-entered the room, brushing yourself off. "Do you have anything for a cold?" you asked.

"I should," Shoko replied, opening up one of her medicine cabinets. "Why, are you feeling okay?"

"Yeah, no, it's for him," you explained. "He's had a runny nose all week. I told him not to go out in the snow with the kids, but... You know how he is."

She hummed in acknowledgement with an understated smile, picking out a bottle of Acetaminophen capsules. Making her way over to you, she held up the container.

"I have these," she told you, but she didn't hand them to you; she just kept holding it up as she continued, "but, in my professional opinion, I don't think he has a cold."

"What do you mean?" you asked, your brow raised.

"Y/N, do you know what tomorrow is?"

"It's... the 24th."

"Mhm."

"So... Christmas Eve?"

She looked down at the floor, placing the bottle on a nearby counter and leaning back against it, getting comfortable. She stayed quiet for a moment, biting her lip in deep thought as she continued to stare at the floor with her arms crossed. But then, finally, she sighed, and reached into her coat pocket for a cigarette.

"Would you like one?" she offered, flicking the lighter at the end of the stick

"Um... No thank you..."

"Have a seat." She gestured to the metal seat against the wall.

Still thoroughly confused, you did as you were told. You felt as if your parents were about to have a stern "talk" with you--as if you had broken a vase or--arguably worse--it was time for you to understand the birds and the bees. That thought, along with the cold steel beneath you, sent chills up your body.

In an attempt to quell your anxiety, you beat her to the punch and spoke up: "You went to high school together, didn't you?"

She blew out a lengthy tangle of smoke strings. "That's right," she answered.

You shifted in your seat. "Has he always been... like this?"

"No,” she chuckled, bringing the cigarette back to her lips. "He used to wear glasses."

Your eyebrows shot up as you leaned forward in shock. "Seriously?"

She reached into her coat pocket again, this time producing a small print of a photo. 

You took the glossy sheet from her hands and studied it, your mouth agape. Sure enough, there he was, on Shoko's right, smiling widely with his hair down and a pair of round sunglasses, both of them holding up peace signs. But, while Shoko's arm was clearly holding up the camera for the selfie, one of Satoru’s arms appeared to be wrapped around the shoulders of a black-haired man you didn't recognize.

Your brows furrowed at the sight. "Who's the one on the left?"

The scent of the nicotine got stronger as she took her time to ponder her answer, staring blankly into the back of the photo beneath your thumbs.

"That's Geto Suguru,” she finally told you.

You scanned his portrait meticulously. The man wore a grumpy expression with dark bags under his eyes and, contrary to the cheerful pose of the other two, he was flipping off the camera.

“Was he an upperclassman?” you asked.

She shook her head. “He was our classmate.” She gestured towards the photo with her cigarette. “We were all second-years there.”

“No way…” Holding the photo closer, you could have sworn you saw the outline of ear gauges behind Shoko’s head. “He looks so much older.”

You returned the photo to her and she slipped it back in her pocket, not taking even a glance at it as she did. She just spoke plainly: “He’s Satoru’s best friend.”

You tilted your head to the side. “Really? I wonder why I haven’t heard of him, then."

She took another puff, turning her face away from you as she let it out. “Tomorrow is his death anniversary.”

Your eyes widened before falling to the floor. “Oh… I see…”

You fell into a solemn trance, not knowing what you should or shouldn’t say and, consequently, opting to stay quiet out of respect. But, suddenly, you were interrupted by the sound of light laughter. 

“Even if he were still with us, I doubt you would’ve been able to tell. They bickered so much you’d think they hated each other.”

She walked around to the other side of the counter, leaning forward on it as she rested her hand on her palm.

“Who could get to class faster… Who could shoot more hoops in a minute… Who could make a bigger crater in the courtyard…”

You tried to imagine the pair wreaking havoc on an older version of the Jujutsu Tech Campus, but while it was easy to fit Satoru’s cheeky grin into all of these scenarios, it was hard to see such a mature-looking person as Geto doing these childish things.

“Ah, but you know, Y/N,” she started, looking up at you with a smile. “I think you would have been able to tell that Suguru was actually younger.”

“What?” you gasped, surprised at both the fact that he was younger and that Shoko thought that would be clear to you. “There’s no way…”

“Well, for starters, Suguru is shorter, if you put them side-by-side,” she argued. “And… Hm…”

She stopped to contemplate how to put together her next sentence–or if she should even do so at all. But in the end, she brought her cigarette back to her lips and exhaled: “I think you would have agreed with me that he’s the more immature one.”

Your brows furrowed as you scoffed in disbelief. “That's impossible… Satoru could be ten-feet tall and not a single thing on this planet could make him seem more mature than another person.”

She chuckled, though you could sense a sadness behind the sound, and you realized that your comment might’ve come off as insensitive. Clearing your throat, awkwardly, you granted her the floor: “What makes you say that?”

She took another inhale and sighed out a long cloud. Looking out the window of her office, she saw the faint glow of the multicolored lights that decorated it on the outside. She took in the sight for a quiet moment before sinking into her swivel chair, puffing once more.

“I still don’t know much about his childhood,” she began. “I never asked, and I never got to meet his parents. But I can tell you for certain that Suguru was the sort of kid who threw a tantrum when he didn’t get what he wanted for Christmas.

“I’m sure he had wishlists a mile long, but he wouldn’t be the kind to write even a single letter about it to Santa. Of course, that’d make it difficult for his family, and maybe they could've tried harder to figure it out–but he just wouldn't understand why what he wanted wasn't obvious to everyone.

“I can imagine one day someone told him the truth about Santa, and he was probably absolutely devastated. But, to him, it wouldn't be about the presents. It would be about the people around him: his mom, his dad, his teachers, his neighbors, everyone–the people who had been deceiving him his whole life.

“I don't think he ever forgave anyone for that, all the way up until he found himself as a seventeen-year-old at Jujutsu High.”

The air became thick–suffocatingly so–and your spine no longer fit right against the back of the bench.

“What exactly… did he do?” 

She rolled her chair towards her desk and put out her cigarette, pushing and twisting it into the ashtray by her desk calendar.

“In a single night, he killed one hundred and twelve civilians–non-sorcerers–including his parents. He wanted to create a world where only sorcerers exist.”

“O-oh my God…” Your hand rose up to cover your gaping mouth. “Wh.. Why?!”

“By killing non-sorcerers, you stop curses from the source.”

“But you can't just–” You cut yourself off, thousands of words rushing and racing to your mouth. “Didn't anyone try to stop him?”

“Maybe Satoru could've. If Suguru decided to tell him, that is.”

Your face was wound up in concern. “That's horrible…”

“I know, right?” she casually agreed.  “To want to be understood, but never willing to understand… Isn't it childish?” She even laughed. “Though, I suppose he was just a kid.”

“Just a kid?!” You stuck your head out in disbelief. “No, no… Satoru is childish. But that–that’s… inhumane!

You pointed to the door. “Satoru was a kid.”

You pointed to her. “You were a kid.”

Lowering your hand, you scrunched the hem of your shirt. “I might not have known you then, but I know you never would have done that.”

“To be fair, I'm not the strongest,” she defended plainly. “I'm just a doctor.”

The crease between your eyebrows deepened as you threw your arms up. “Okay–then Satoru! Satoru would never do something like that! And he… he's still a kid!”

“Satoru killed his best friend–his one and only.” She clasped her hands together on her desk. “A kid wouldn't do that, would they?”

You froze at the edge of your seat, blinking rapidly as you pieced together the puzzle.

“He… killed…?” you trailed off.

Shoko stared grimly at her hands as she tightened her grip on herself. “A kid wouldn’t have understood.”

You bore your eyes into her, waiting, begging for her to continue, to elaborate, to make it make sense, but she just stayed quiet, kept to herself.

You directed your eyes to the freshly polished floor tiles. As you stared into the blurry reflection of yourself, you tried imagining it again: Satoru, tall and white haired, and this kid grumpy little kid he called Suguru, wreaking havoc on the old campus of Jujutsu High: walking to class together, dribbling a basketball between each other, meeting up in the courtyard with one another.

 “That…” you began hesitantly. “That still doesn't excuse what happened.”

Shoko looked up at you, for the first time in what felt like an eternity, and though she wasn’t as contented as she had been before your conversation, her expression was no longer grave; she seemed satisfied. Slowly, she put her palms on her desk and pushed herself up from her seat.

“To answer your question from earlier–properly,” she started, making her way over to you. “I think that Satoru has always been that way–the way Gojo Satoru has to be.”

“But if there were ever a time that he weren’t,” she interjected, sliding her hand into her coat pocket.

“It would have been thanks to him.”

***

Your footsteps echoed down the empty hallway, stopping every once in a while to slide open one of the stiff doors only to struggle to shut it a moment later. You increased the reach of your steps, and the thump of your shoes against the wood planks competed with the hooting owl perched on the snow covered roof.

Suddenly, you heard a new noise: a honking, like that of a goose, coming from the end of the hall and slightly to the left. Now picking up to a jog, you made a beeline for the door and jerked it open.

“Well, if it isn’t my long-awaited Christmas present!” he exclaimed. “Looks like Santa’s early this year.”

He rested against the corner of one of the student’s desks, already facing you with his hands in his pocket. From behind him, you could just barely see the white crumpled-up balls of tissue that scattered the surface.

“I guess some people do gifts on Christmas Eve though, right?” he considered, putting a finger to his chin. “But, ah… choosing gifts is so hard. I need all the time I can get.”

He didn’t acknowledge your entrance at all; his Six Eyes had seen it coming miles away, allowing him enough time to get into position to pick up wherever you’d last left off. You didn’t acknowledge him either, keeping a stone face as you stepped into the room.

“What’s with the face, hm? Did you not like your presents?”

“Satoru,” you said sternly.

“Did you ask Santa for anything this year?” he went on, continuing to pay you no mind.

You sighed. You couldn’t help but let the ends of your lips pick up, but you kept your eyes down at the dirtied pattern of the floor.

“I don’t celebrate Christmas,” you admit.

“What? Why not?” he questioned astonishedly, forming a pout. “Does that mean you didn’t get me a present?”

You shook your head lightly, making your way over to him. “I’ve always thought it was sort of weird. To celebrate the birth of a martyr.”

“Hm,” he sounded. “Well that’s no fun.”

Planting his hands on the surface, he hoisted himself up onto his desk. “Santa probably wouldn’t give anything other than coal to a non-believer,” he noted. “But since I’m so nice, I’ll get you something. Just tell me–what is it that you want for Christmas?”

His smile stayed in place as you darted your pupils around his visage, your own face beginning to fall. You took slow steps towards the desk next to him, getting as close as you could before you felt his Infinity push back

“Satoru, can you do me a favor?” you requested gently.

“Depends on what the favor is,” he chirped back.

Reaching your hand out, you traced your forefinger on the edge of the invisible barrier before applying pressure into it, testing the shield’s strength. You pushed with all your might, but all it did was whiten your finger tip and make your knuckles concave.

You retracted, looking back into his eyes. “Can you take it down?”

You could see the movement of his eyebrows raising beneath his blindfold. “You tryna kill me?”

Again, you shook your head, still solemn. 

He crossed his arms and squinted at you, biting his cheek. Leaning back, he put his weight onto his hands behind him, loosely grabbing the edge of his desk, his expression becoming relaxed. “Alright. Here you go.”

You took another small step into the newfound space until you were only inches apart. Slowly, you extended both your hands towards his face, but then suddenly reeled them back into a hesitant fist in disbelief, the lack of resistance uncomfortably foreign.

You inhaled deeply through your nose and exhaled the air shakily through your mouth, trying hard to slow the rapid beating in your chest. Ignoring the smirk on his face, you tried to reach out to him, one final time.

Letting your arms wrap around his head, your hands searched his silky hair for the knot that held up his eye covering. When you finally felt the bump, you took your time digging your nails into where the fabric held onto itself, carefully pulling apart its loops.

As the blindfold fell to his neckline, his signature grin stayed plastered on his face, but just about every other feature of his seemed to change completely when the white wisps came down to frame them. His azure eyes, for example, glimmered under the faint moonlight coming through the window, but not in the way that they usually did. They were shining like lacquer, but it was as if, from underneath that, their batteries had been taken out. In their dullness, you could see the reflection of the long white lashes resting on the eyelids above, forming sharp, unnatural shapes as they clumped together unevenly. Pink waterlines painted the bottom of his irises, and a faint red was seemingly airbrushed around the surrounding puffy skin.

You trailed your hands down the back of his head until they cupped his jawline, holding his face as you explored its entirety. Moving from his eyes to his flushed, leaking nose, his smirk grew when your gaze landed on his lips.

“Are you sure you want to use your gift on this?” he teased. “Kind of a waste, in my opinion–you could’ve just found a mistletoe.”

“Satoru.”

“Hmm?”

“I want you to stop smiling.”

For a moment, he listened to you: his mouth fell open, but then it fell back into its previous position as he flashed his teeth at you. “My bad. I didn’t mean to blind you.”

“Please?”

He kept still while your thumb gently stroked his powder-smooth cheek. He jolted slightly as his lungs forced out a nervous chuckle, but he trailed off as your touch continued on him. Realizing your relentlessness, he sucked in his lips and clamped them together with his teeth as if he was trying to stop any further laughter.

He stayed like this for a moment, waiting for you to let go, but your tender movements showed no signs of stopping–you only slowed down when your eyes flitted up to meet his. He tried his best to return your stare, but eventually, he accepted defeat in the contest. And so, little by little, he let his lips roll out and the muscles to dispose into a resting state.

His voice became low, a near whisper. “Is… everything okay?”

Finally removing your hands from him, you nodded. Returning them to yourself, you glided one into the back pocket of your pants.

Taking a step back, you held up the sheet of glossy photo paper side-by-side with his face. You could name a number of differences: the neckline of the teacher’s uniform was looser and higher, his bangs now were longer and a bit thicker, and, of course, he wasn’t wearing glasses, and he wasn’t smiling. But, somehow, now more than ever, you could see the resemblance.

“What have you got there?”

Moving towards him again, you handed him the photo. It felt strange, witnessing the rare sight of his pupils’ every rapid move. And in addition to that, ever so slightly, you could see his swollen under eyes rise as the softest of smiles pushed up his cheeks. It was nothing like the sickeningly-sweet beamings you were used to seeing from him, though; it was subdued, raw like the cacao in dark chocolate, undiluted by sugar or milk.

“Where did you get this?” he asked, incredulous.

“Like you said, Santa came early,” you joked mildly.

“No, really,” he persisted, his tone reaching a bass you’d never heard from him before. “Where did you get this?”

You sat yourself on the desk next to him. “Shoko,” you admitted.

“What did she tell you?”

Your shrug was subtle.  “As much as she could.”

He continued to scrutinize the photo in his hands, his brows drawing together.

“Satoru,” you proceeded, hushed. “If it’s okay… I’d like it if you told me about it.”

He lowered the photo so that it no longer obstructed his view of you, but he didn’t take advantage of the space he gave himself; he kept staring at the photo as he spoke: “There’s not much to tell about. I was the strongest then and I’m the strongest now.”

You rested your hands on your lap and exhaled deeply. “That’s not what I mean,” you contested. 

It was as if he couldn’t hear you, continuing to stare vapidly into the photo as if somehow your sentence didn’t make it to his ears. But that was impossible; you’d said what you said, and the room was dead silent.

“I… I want you to tell me about him,” you clarified.

He shifted in his seat, finally looking away from the photo and up at you. “You mean… Geto Suguru?” he asked, as if there were any other ‘him’ in that photo. 

“Well… he’s the worst of all curse users,” he offered. He then shoved the photo back in your direction, a sudden grin straining itself on his face. “But it’s okay. He’s gone now.”

Ignoring his move, you asked, “Is it really okay?”

“I made sure of it,” he affirmed, impatiently nudging the paper at you.

He resumed his usual playful lilt. “Are you doubting me?” he tested.

“I don’t doubt you for a second–not in that sense. You’ve always been strong,” you reassured him. “But that’s exactly why I doubt you know how to be weak.”

He scoffed. “You think Gojo Satoru would know how to be weak?”

“No, I don’t. That’s my whole point,” you upheld firmly.

He folded his arms across his chest, his mocking tone sharpening: “Why would anyone want to know how to be weak?”

“Because even Gojo Satoru needs to realize he can’t just smile and laugh all the time,” you challenged, feeling heat rise up your neck.

His eyes darkened, seemingly into a navy blue, and his inflection further condescended: “There are a lot of things you don’t understand.”

“Satoru, how on earth am I supposed to understand?!” 

As your tone cut through, just as abruptly you pushed the desk behind you and dropped heavily to your feet.

“You’re right, I don't understand you,” you confessed frustratedly, pointing to yourself. “I don’t understand you at all. Because how could I possibly understand you? I can’t see your eyes, I can’t even get near you, and I’ve never seen you not smile.”

Your voice made gaps as your vocal cords threatened sobs. “And sure, I call you by your first name, and I laugh and I smile at all your dumb jokes and… and the idiotic games you play…

“But it’s–it’s… scary, Satoru. Creepy, even. How you know just about everything there is to know about me and yet… It's like I don’t even know who you are. You’re just a toy in the corner, watching everyone come in and out of the room, but I can never make you say or be or feel anything.”

“Feelings are what made him into who he was,” he stated coldly, his eyes fixed on the grimy floor. “It’s important for sorcerers to have a hold on their emotions.”

“So you know what happens, then,” you argued firmly, your shoes coming into his view as you stepped closer. “You know what it’s like to be shut out from them.”

You pushed his chin up, forcing him to witness the way you were holding on desperately to the tears that bordered your lower waterline.

“Doesn’t it hurt?”

“Do you always get Sprite?” he’d asked, looking down as his friend retrieved his drink from the bottom of the machine.

“I mean… yeah, I guess,” Suguru replied plainly. “Why?”

A pit formed in his stomach as he heard the crack of the can opening.

“Shit. I’ve been getting you Coke this whole time,” he’d mumbled. “Why didn’t you say anything?”

Suguru shrugged, beginning to head in the direction of the classroom. “It’s not that big of a deal.”

“Dude, are you good?”

Suguru jolted awake, sitting up from the plush back of the couch and nearly spilling the bowl of popcorn in his lap.

“Do you wanna watch something else?” he’d suggested, but Suguru just shook his head.

“I thought you liked Digimon,” Suguru objected.

“Well yeah, but…”

The only lighting came from the flashing screen, but it was enough for him to see his friend yawn, making his eyes water, dark bags underneath them.

“You can turn it up if you want,” was all Suguru had to say, but even after doing what Suguru said, he couldn’t focus on his favorite TV show.

“I know you said you didn’t want anything,” he started, reaching into his bag. “But here.”

“What’s this?” Suguru questioned.

“Your Christmas present, duh.”

“But it’s Christmas Eve,” Suguru pointed out. “And I told you–”

“I know! But just open it.”

He watched as Suguru lifted the lid of the small gray box, revealing a small pair of white gauges.

“I didn’t really know what size to get… But I think they’d look cool on you.”

“Thanks, Satoru.”

He lit up, thinking that he’d finally done something right by his friend, but the way that Suguru looked up at him, the way Suguru smiled insincerely, told him he should’ve waited for Christmas Day.

The tears were warm as they rolled down his face, past his trembling lip and blooming into the blindfold that rested loosely around his neck.

“I just don't understand why he didn’t talk to me.”

You pulled him into a hug, carding your fingers in his hair as you rested his head on your shoulder.

“He thought I hated him,” he told you shakily, finding himself clutching onto your shirt. “I didn’t see him for ten years and… and that whole time he thought I hated him.”

He inhaled a sharp sniffle. “I… I don’t hate him,” he whimpered, his pitch jumping and his body beginning to tremble. “I don’t hate him, Y/N, I don’t, I don’t, I never, ever did.”

“I know,” you whispered, stroking his hair, holding him tighter as he jerked with sobs.

He placed his head on your shoulder, staring at the blindfold that had unraveled itself and fallen between you. “I hate myself.”

You pulled back, cupping his jawline and holding it in front of you.

“Don’t say that…”

“But he was my best friend, Y/N,” he insisted, gripping desperately onto your shoulders. “I saw him every single day… every single day, all of that was running through his head and I… I didn’t even know… I just watched and… and I made him think I hated him. I was supposed to be his best friend.”

“You did everything you could, Satoru.”

“It was all my fault.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“Then why did it happen?” he whined. “It had to have been for a reason–It can't just hurt and be for no reason. That wouldn’t be fair.”

“It’s not,” you told him, shaking your head gently and looking deeply into his eyes. “It’s not fair at all.”

Indicating the breaking of a dam, a deafening, siren-like wail pierced the air. His face was red and scrunched up, his nose was dripping with snot, and his hands were coming up to swipe desperately at the tears on his cheeks.

You pulled him close to you again as he kept hiccuping and sniffling into the crook of your neck. His loud weeping wet your shirt with both the fluids from his eyes and nose, but you didn’t care; you just rubbed his back, caressing him tenderly.

His voice was suddenly clearer as he took deep breaths to try and recuperate himself: “I’m sorry,” he murmured.

“Why are you sorry?” you asked, stiffening your hold on him.

“I just… I don’t know. I hate crying. I’m not a kid anymore, you know?” he tried laughing.

“Satoru,” you whispered delicately, turning your head so your words rested right by his ear. “You were never a kid.”

Gently, you pressed his head into you, stopping him from moving his lips in any way. “I want you to be one right now.”

You let him stay in your arms for a while until his tears subsided and his breathing steadied. You had moved to the floor at some point, allowing him to comfortably lean on you as you embraced him, his previous quivering replaced now by the calm rhythm of his rising and falling figure.

He hadn’t talked in a while, so you assumed he’d fallen asleep, but then, among his mellow breathing, a mumble came up right by your ear:

“Thank you,” he’d said.

Hugging him tighter, you patted him on the back softly. “Of course.”

As one hand traveled to intertwine its fingers in his hair, you reached for your phone with your other one.

You pressed the power button on its side, and flinched backward, squinting at the brightness your phone screen emitted. Despite your sudden movement, Satoru didn’t show any sort of reaction; he’d fallen asleep, for sure now.

You continued to comb through his white locks, a little more consciously now, as you made note of the time and date your phone’s clock displayed, changing right before your eyes:

December 25th, 00:00

You smiled, dragging your coat up to cover the both of you as you laid your head on his shoulder.

“Merry Christmas, Satoru.”

***

might do a toji x megumi's teacher reader if u wanna follow

[stonyponyofficial]

aw sweet! see what it says on the calendar?summer has sprung, it seems! some might say its time to show u sillies some songs for the season!

spotify link :3 :: yt link :3

full list + notes under the cut ^w^

Aluralura - Sweet Trip: this somg is soooooo fucking smooth. and cool. using the strictest definition of cool i can. perhaps cooler than cool. dk what ud even call that but this is it. sounds like i should be cruisin down the information highway to this straight up. feels like im being hit with a million little lightning bolts in. a good way? that doesnt sound good but it is. ull get it just listen pls just li

Babe of the Abyss - Girls Rituals: UGH devi.. i was so sad when this was pulled from streaming for a bit like some of the other singles from the upcoming girls rituals, but thankfully it did return :3 unlike the rest of those songs :/ eh this one is good enough to make up for it! so glittery and clicky and kinda unlike a lot of other songs devis done but it's v unique like that :3 the cover is interesting to me too bc it looks ai generated and it reminds me of a video devi made explaining her songwriting process a bit and after setting an arpeggiater (dk if i spelled that right lmao) to random she said she likes the collaboration between her and her computer and letting the computer decide some things like that :3 idk just a neat little factoid for ya

BALD! - JPEGMAFIA: was gonna put one of the tracks off scaring the hoes in this spot but, after deciding to go through peggys solo stuff a bit i liked this one even more than those ones :3 he has a very interesting and wide ranging sound tho so im really excitied to listen to more. uhh nothing else to say really. juts good song 👍

Cops and robbers - underscores: new underscores era hello anyone rockin wit it???? ME im rocking with jt thank u very much!! that one song count of three (you can eat $#@!), which ive heard is very good :3, was the end of the fishmonger era for them, where the "thing" was apparently that underscores wanted guitar on each track. still trying to find The thing about this eras sound, and maybe its the deeming it "the Wallsocket era", but to me everything just feels very buzzy, very electrically alive idk. like theres just this CRT/fluorescent light hum that backs the bass at the beginning. and the middle section just sounds like im listening to a fucking tesla coil make a pop song. shit Rocks. and Fucks. i give this one the Makes Violet Sing And Dance Around In Her Room Alone award this season, which is something i will absolutely be doing from now on and will not forget for the fall hehe :3

Dariacore Song Tutorial - leroy/Jane Remover: wait i thought there was YEAH there was dariacore on the last one, but as ive seen it so elegantly explained, this is a jane song more than a dariacore song. i mean obviously sonically right, no memey hyperpop mash up font, just some loud ass guitars n drums, but its good!!! jane literally incapable of missing.

Dress Down - Kaoru Akimoto: one of my many music moments recently has been getting into city pop more! i kiiinda only know the hits, of which this is definitely one of them, but ive seen my way around a bit B) (my cool sunglasses guy do not steal.) and even after my journey round the city.. pop, this is still one of my faves.

FELL - Varg^2™️ (im toolazy to make it superscript sowwy) & Bladee: since i began my drain journey i thought id listened to most if not all of bladees stuff besides like really old stuff that actually isnt good. like, bladee isnt good, but u get used to it as the saying goes and u kinda get to see his artistic vision unfold as he releases new stuff. but old bladee really isnt good. anyway imagine my delight and splendor when i see theres another Varg^2TM, Bladee collab... besides ecco and the rest of drain gang varg is probably my favorite bladee collaborator. in fact i almost put SHINIE, another collab from them, on some spring songs but it didnt make the cut unfortch. glad i could find something new from them to dig into mm yummy bladee :3

!¡! find the answer ¡!¡ - six impala: holy FUCK i am listening to six impala!

光の中へ (hikari no naka e)- Kessoku Band: yeah yeah i know there was kessoku band on the last one BUT THEY MADE MORE SO I LISTENED TO IT. they have such good push and pull with their tunes. like the moments of silence/slowing down before going all out. the quick drum interjections to pick things back up again. like nijikas fuckin getting it!!!! actually i read something recently about the critical reception to kessoku band, the self titled album, that makes a similar point. they were saying that although the album is just good j-rock on its own, the strength of the individual instruments and the texture of the songs themselves embodies the characters in your mind. like i listened to the beginning a bit closer one time and heard the little shreds the guitar was giving at the top and it instantly made me think like "oh shit bocchis fucking tearing it up!" soooo good instantly one of my faves from them.

It Was A Good Day - Ice Cube: fuuuuuuck i cant fucking find it i wasngonna put it here bc its the reason i added it to my playlist and have been listening to it so mch recently but. i cant find it. it was a top text bottom text cat meme edit of this song, in the same vein as that one of death grips' hacker. a very good morning walk song btw, cuz even tho it would be very easy for that situation to feel trite, im like shit. mama cooked the breakfast with no hog! todays gonna be a good day. it usually isnt with where im heading on my morning walk but. eventually itll be a good day! and the iced cube told me that.

Les Os - The Unicorns: sooooo this song is extremely horny to me sorry. also very kinda toxic t4t core but thats juts meeeeeee :3... + the singers voice is very similar in register to mine when in singing so it makes it v easy to project who daid that.... uhh anywag in the ol violet amv machine (what i call my brain) i imagine the singer with the mic stand tilted back between their legs, perhaps a cheeky little leg wrap around like sexy singers tend to do, as they stare down from the stage into yuor eyes specifically. asking u directly, out of everyone. tell me bout ur love affairs.. tell me bout ur moral resignations... so then u meet after the show and [transmission lost]

LOU - whoTF (Folie & Forget Basement), Fraxiom: [transmission regained] and from the production stylings of new hyperpop ish duo whoTF comes another lyrical miracle from the mind and pen of fraxiom music!!! includes such bangers as "I’m blowing up your car/I see Mercedes boom/I’m off four drinks of alcohol/Pissing in the ladies room!" rhyming "you can watch a youtube video" with "get your fitted tutu biddie hoe" (LIKE?) and also the amazing outro from which i could just paste the whole thing but this part resonates especially "I need to become alive, in the morning, like a rooster!/Don't talk to me until I've had my coffee and foodstuffs"..."Estradiol, finasteride, adderall, and thc im juiced up!" making rooster rhyme with foodstuff and juiced up and also everything else in that part god. they dont call them fraxiom fucking music for nothing. um but also whoTF is v good, for one without frax that is still good listen to cigs up as well :3

Natural Disasters - Enon: love me a song with a strange guitar hook! ive heard this bands like top 2 songs (which include this one) bc it was just a night of spotify surfing, but those two songs are quite good. very boucy, good energy. makes me wanna do the bounce in place dance and flail my arms as i sing only the chorus and maybe try to approximate the sounds of the lyrics i dont know. sounds like a good time to me!

Overflow - Een Glish, Tyfty, Ben Glish: eek! so ai voiced songs specifically rap is very good to me. that family ties edit with spongebob and patrick is probably one of my favorite pieces of music. but this artist is v interesting to me :3 een glish is a vocaloid (? not sure if entirely correct but u get what im getting at) made from the google translate ladys voice. and its GOOD this one specifically is very catchy but she has bars too!!! check out rap game bob ross too, and also the remix with bars from SONIC HELLO? im giving this one the Sound of the Summer distinction bc not only is it a very summery jam, but it is the one im really telling u to check out if u get the chance. lots of good jams here.

Scatman - Scatman John (DJ Kadozer 2003 Remix): (why did i accidentally type out 'evil remix' at first?) sooooo i was having a bit of a scatman moment recently, as was documented in THIS other epic music post u should go check out if u havent already hihhii :3 tho she TOTALLY STOLE the one i was gonna do, Scatman's World, cuz everyone knows scatman right? skabadaba bweebopbopbadop bop? bopbop badop bop? yeah that one! but.... have u ever heard scatman. like this???? probably not... all im sayin... scat vocals/eurobeat foundation translated to this stabbing edm remix.. its quite good. good enough that the first few seconds alone get me to smile big like this :)

Shop - Toby Fox: songs to order a You. Pick. 2... to...... haha but seriously guys this ones just a really chill one :3 i can alwasy hear the you. pick. 2. part in the song bc theyre punctuated exactly the same way its kinda hell. im chillin. like usual. listenin to undertale musicand then how boutta You. Pick. 2. with some brawwwcolli cheddah. onsecond th... and then were done with that and back to the normal undertale song! like an angle in the knight.. or tiers in the reign...... here and then gone forever. truly, ephemeral..............................

The Flag Is Raised - Asian Glow: in case we couldn't drain enough this summer, asian glow put out this really neat interpretation of one of my faves off bladee and ecco2k's recent masterpiece, Crest. follows in the footsteps of many a bladee cover for me where the cover often plays over the actual song in my head. like i expect certain isntrumentation when i listen to the original that is only present in the cover but that just means theyre both good ! the guitars and the cymbals all over this make this version feel so shiny... aww and they use the little sigil ring from Crest on the cover for it too :"3

THE FLIES - Operation Sodasteal: think i mentioned this in the tags of a post that im sure uve all read before coming to class today, but ive been listening to a lot of these guys recently! just some furry emo nightcore rock that sounds plucked right out of 2007. the one vocalist, slaney(in)famous i think? im not confident which is which, has such a good voice for it too like they have all the good vocal inflections of ur typical lead pop punk vocalist, and i usually just end up singing the lyrics like them bc im just a silly little mirror huh?

This Must Be The Place (Naive Melody) - Talking Heads: ooobh i got plany off time....... yeag ive been getting down with this jam recently :3 another good morning walk tune. been trying to get into talking heads a bit more too bc every song i hear is soooo good. like i almost put the girl wants to be with the girls here bc of that OTHER meme edit i actually dont remember if it was lolcats again. it was specifically the "girls are getting into.. abstract analysis!" OHHBB it was a rose homestuck thing bc i memba her sitting at her lappytop :3 doin some fuckin abstract analysis i suppose..

Tin Man - feeble little horse: this is another single turned favorite-song-on-the-full-album-bc-i-took-too-long-making-this-list-again-lol. i love what theyre doin to these guitars maan theyre really fuckin em up in there..... also i love that this band just calls its music guitar music. its fuckin true.

Vicinity of Obscenity - System Of A Down: songs that have done irreversible damage to my psyche and syntax. i will bust out a banana banana banana terracotta banana terracotta terracotta pie when the fuck ever just let me know the time and place my man. it is such a vocal stim for me. this whole song is honestly. some of the silliest nu metal u can get ur paws on i checked (she is lying to u again tho it is quite silly with it 😳) + had to go with the 2008 youtube editor lyric video for the youtube playlist obviously.

ahmmmmm so thanks u all once again for enjoying some more songs with me (summer edition)!!!!! <3333 see yall...... in the fall.. with some more songs hehe (or perhaps for summer......2! who knowce :3 the summers still got plany off time as some might say)

[nightcolorz]

i’m late but for the ask game: armand 6, 8, 25

YIPPIE!! Thank u sm for sending this, I’ve been pretty severely injured lately and I woke up feeling so shit and sad, so getting this notif absolutely made my day. Armand !!! He is my favorite character in anything ever. I have literally never been so insane about a guy before. U picked some great questions so I’m super excited about this.

6. What's something you have in common with this character?

I identify strongly with Armand for a lot of weird little reasons. I think the root of it is transgender and autism stuff if I’m honest 😭 Im going to try not to get tooo personal 👍👍 but I will let’s be honest, I will get personal. I can relate to being fetishized and characterized for my sort of androgynous/pretty/boyish appearance while I feel like how I look doesn’t truly reflect who I am as a person. I definitely get the struggle of being demeaned and treated like a child bcus of the juvenile ish appearance transitioning can give you. I also can relate to being demeaned and treated like a child because of my social awkwardness (due to autism) that causes many ppl to assume I’m unintelligent or immature, need to be treated gently or talked to slowly, etc. I see these parts of myself reflected in Armand ofc in different more vampiric ways, and having a character who is infantilized and talked down to while also fetishized and sexually exploited for a perceived innocence that isn’t reflective of who he really is at all, a guy who is also very strange and awkward and doesn’t act right, who is also simultaneously very bad ass (imo lmao) in his shamelessness and his overtly violent and freak of nature attitude, is weirdly very validating and empowering for me, lmao. He is like the weak shameful parts of myself if the weak shameful parts of myself had teeth. 👍👍👍 Yeah 😁😁😁😁 Armand 🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶

8. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you despise?

lmfaooo, I’m so happy u picked this one bcus I love complaining and being a hater 😍 I am sorry in advance if I say anything that ruffles any bodies feathers, just bcus I don’t like these things ppl do doesn’t mean I don’t like the ppl who do them, y’all do u I’m not stopping u. Anyways.

I don’t enjoy how a handful of amc exclusive fans characterize Armand, because you can tell they rlly only understand him based on Wikipedia reads and his brief appearance in the show so far, which results in this sort of glaring simplification of his character in fan content. This wouldn’t rlly bother me if not for how prevalent it is 😭 like it’s genuinely difficult for me to find interesting and in character fanfic about Armand bcus so much of it is uniformed. The amc fandom sort of dominates the tvc fandom, it’s just so big. I don’t like when Armand is reduced to Louis’s new scary hot boyfriend/Lestat replacement/potential villain. It feels like he’s often perceived through this lens of a role in the story, like “hm this guy seems like a potential villain”, “no I think he’s a new love interest”, which is a conversation I find no appeal in at all considering you can’t fit the Armand I love into any of these narrative boxes. This isn’t rlly smth I have personal beef with bcus there’s no harm in fans of the show characterizing armand based on there limited knowledge while they wait for the next season, but for me it’s a pet peeve you know, as someone who rlly rlly likes armand a lot 😭.

(This is the exception to my no hate to u if u do this disclaimer btw, all the hate to u). on the subject of amc fans, I also often see this hostility towards fans of book Armand, where I’ll see amc fans talking about how perverse he is conceptually in the books and how gross ppl who like him are, which REALLY makes me very mad, because ok. Listen. Show armand is not a character yet, any and all things you enjoy about armand as of now as someone who hasn’t read the books are 1. How he looks. And 2. Things from the books that you apply to him in a new context. Assad’s performance, the people working on the show, the writers, everything that you base your enjoyment of armand in, is from the books 😭 But god forbid someone enjoy the source material over the hypothetical character who barely exists yet? God forbid someone do the same thing u do (take smth arguably morally dubious and interpret it in a way that u find interesting and compelling while acknowledging the morally dubious source material) just not in the context of an adaption. Ok. God forbid I enjoy and identify with an adult character trapped in the body of a child who is misperceived for his youth and sexually abused, it’s not like this is the same concept of beloved amc Claudia anyway. It’s also not like I am capable of enjoying something while criticizing it and disliking it’s flaws, and coming to conclusions based on critical thinking and analysis of concepts that may have been executed poorly, that I still admire and enjoy, bcus I am capable of complex thinking, and I don’t need to blindly enjoy every part of smth and perceive it as flawless to enjoy it. We all know that’s fake ! Anyways sorry for the angry rant 😭😭😭 moving on.

On a separate note, I also sometimes have beef with how fellow book armand fans portray him. This is small and sort of petty but it bothers me when Armand is drawn as like, very small and skinny. Maybe it’s bcus I head canon him as chubby and sort of cherub-built, maybe it’s bcus in TVA armand describes himself as strong in build and “not waif-ish”, but either or it does feel sort of wrong and off putting when I see Armand drawn as like, so small and petite that it’s emphasized. To me this reads as a missing of the point, if you will. An emphasis on physical qualities representative of innocence and youth that aren’t reflective of Armand’s character, only rlly how some other characters see him. I can often tell when an Armand fan enjoys him for the superficial qualities (eternally young, angelic looking, etc) over who he is, and it always encourages me to steer clear. I hope I’m making sense lol. This is also sometime present in fic but it’s more subtle and difficult to describe. Anyways

25. What was your first impression of this character? How about now?

I was thinking about this yesterday! I was first introduced to Armand when I was maybe 11 or 12, my dad put on 94 interview with the vampire for me and my twin sister while he did work around the house etc. he started watching it with us (he loves 94 iwtv) but by the time Armand showed up at the half way point he got up and started doing other things, so my sister and I were alone in front of the screen. For some reason lost to time my sister and I were very excited about seeing Antonio Banderas, maybe because we knew him from Zorro, so in the aftermath of the buffoon scene with Santiago that we found really funny, when Antonio Banderas appeared on screen we were hyped tf up. We were so enthralled in the moment of his cunty ass entrance we started cheering and clapping and screaming 😭 I think shrieking ARMANNNDDD!!!! At the screen (with no knowledge of who armand even was) Till I started laughing to tears is in my top ten formative moments. My first viewing of iwtv was just like that 😭 there was smth in the water that had my sister and I loosing our fucking minds with excitement over that movie. Anyways, I only immersed myself into the fandom and got rlly into tvc just last year, when I read interview with the vampire (smth that’s always been in the back of my mind since my first viewing, I really did love that movie) and then the rest of tvc. When I was reading interview with the vampire I had that subconscious excitement over Armand’s half way point appearance brewing from the get go (every time my sister and I have watched iwtv together since we were 12 we’ve done the same screaming at the screen ritual for armand) so when I was re introduced to him I was instantly attached to him. I very quickly discovered how much I was enthralled by this guy, like by his first appearance and description it went from a weird little nostalgic affection to a “omfg I feel many inexplicably strong feelings for this guy”. He was just so magnetic and weird, I was intrigued by every thing about him, like Louis lol. I started drawing him a bunch b4 I’d even finished the first book, and by the time I was introduced to him in tvl he was my favorite character. Tvl really solidified my armand obsession, and queen of the damned made me the person I am today 😭 insane. I think my impression of him now should be obvious at this point 😔 he is my silliest guy every morning I wake up and he is the first thought in my mind I cry about him daily I worship him like he’s my god sometimes I see a blender and I am so overwhelmed with emotion I want to scream if a professional looked into my brain and saw all the armand in there they’d diagnose me with super mega autism. I like him a lot. 🫶

Thank you sm for sending this ask once again! I’m sorry it’s so long lol, hope my responses were interesting. This is the ask game in question for anyone who may potentially want to send me more asks: https://www.tumblr.com/nightcolorz/734243514562510848?source=share I would cry with joy if so.

[yakultstanreblog]

I kid you not I was just sitting in the uni library and before getting up to give up for the day and leave I wrote in my notes app kinda jokingly but kinda not:

“maybe western beliefs are just so wrong maybe no amount of doctor can fix me maybe I am simply cursed lol for I have sinned many times and seek no forgiveness - a new level of insanity or clarity” (Ik my notes are full of weird shit.. I was also studying medical dominance and how westerners have made it seemingly superior to other forms of health practices/understandings such as religious sin etc for context)

AND I WALK OUT OF THE LIBRARY, START WALKING HOME WITH MY SAD MUSIC ON REPEAT, ON THE VERGE OF TEARS FOR NO REASON(bc life rough but im fine), ON THE EDGE OF CAMPUS AND AM FULLY FINDING MYSELF WILLINGLY BEING PREACHED TO BY A CULT about the heavenly mother oh my god they’re getting smarter LIKE SM SMARTER cause I almost believed this was just a hella feminist Christian for a solid 10 minutes help im out of practice I haven’t been approached by a cult member in like 6 months cos I rarely leave the house ANYWAYS luckily for me I have an unhealthy special interest? in the researching of cults and every single step of their indoctrination particularly the correlation of various korean cults indoctrinating australian white women (when I say cults I don’t just mean religious organisation, cos while there is valid argument that all religion could TECHNICALLY be cult-like, I need u to know I respect religion for others and what it is and am aware there are some prominent factors which differentiate normal religious organisation from genuine proper cult) luckily this particular cult wasn’t going to take me to meet its rapist leader in korea like most the other in melb but it does isolate u from ppl u know and force u to “donate” all ur money lmao fail bc im already socially isolated and I have no money LOLOOL anyways usually they ask for ur number but they also have half given up when u tell them u used to be religious and ur not anymore bc ur critical but this time they just gave me their number cos I think they thought I was like fully convinced cos I was stupidly engaging in the discourse with half interest (but only bc I was trying to make sense if what they were telling me was accurate or not from a religious standpoint bc I was raised Catholic) but sneakily she was telling me all about the Hebrew bible and shit with examples of Hebrew text I couldn’t read LOLOL and what I rlly should have said is god is not my mother or father bitch my (ex) god ain’t male or female, my god if existent be a genderless non human spirit referred to as “he” bc we live in a patriarchal society where male pronouns are pretty standard in referring to just about anything in English language ANYWAYS I lowkey love engaging w cult members while some ppl say dangerous I usually detach my interest while talking as further research into their communicative ways but today I was caught so off guard bc at my particular uni there are usually just religious preachers sometimes who have no ill intent and see my gay stickers on my laptop and give up before they even start knowing they are gonna fail but these ppl defs didn’t go to my uni they were just waiting on the outskirts for sad uni students to approach LMAO mission accomplished also they told me im a good listener when I was like zoning out bc I said yes yes yes when they asked me if I was aware of particular religions events and terms lol that was not very convincing bc I was not demonstrating good listening at all ANYWAYS this was a pointless and probably an incomprehensible story that I cbf reading over hope u enjoyed stay safe don’t go getting indoctrinated into a cult

[satankilledmyghost]

Request for Eugene gale with a older sister figure friend, shes kind and eays worrying about him. thank you:)

eugene x reader - sisterly love

AKSJJDHSJ- I GOT MY FIRST REQUEST! THANK YOU, ANON!!!

first of all, i'm so, so sorry that it has taken so long, i feel horrible that i've made you wait this long. i've been fighting writer's block for this fic with my life lmao. secondly, i cannot express how excited i was when i first saw your request in my inbox- i was on crack and cloud nine for the rest of the day.

IM STILL WORKING ON THE OTHER REQUESTS I PROMISE. I SWEAR IM NOT FORGETTING ABOUT YOU😭 i'll try to have another one out later tonight and if not, it'll be out tomorrow.

thank you for your patience anon and all the other anons. i really appreciate it :)

i hope i have done your request justice!

warnings: swearing, f/n means friend's name

It was Saturday and you were supposed to be out and about the town with F/N, but your mind seemed to wander back to the same thing.

Is he okay??

You haven't heard from Eugene in a long time, and while you know he has his own life and doesn't solely revolve around you, you get anxious at the thought of his absence.

You weren't stupid, you know what Eugene's been through all of middle school and you can't imagine what's happened in high school that has caused Eugene to stop contacting you like he's currently doing.

You can't even try to estimate how many times you've met up with Eugene after school a year ago just to see bruises and bandages on his face, his glasses messed up, his clothes stained and drawn on with insults.

It infuriated you every time you saw it, but you knew that you couldn't do anything. Eugene wasn't even in the same school as you, and you going up against whoever bullied Eugene was definitely not a good idea. You'd die, probably, if you were lucky.

You watered down your rage for his bullies by helping Eugene clean off and hanging out with him until you knew that he felt better. You were always there for him- you always will be.

You try to believe that he's finally made other friends beside Rowan, that Eugene's found his little group that accept him for who he is. But that stupid, tiny part of doubt in your brain takes that string of hope and lights it on fire, leaving a pile of ashes to lay meaningless on the floor.

"Y/N? Are you even listening to me??" You blink, your conscious throttled back to reality. "Huh?" You turn to look at your friend who was holding up a book. "I asked if you've read this before? I don't know if I want to get it because of how expensive it is, but if it's worth the money, I'm getting it." She rambled.

You take a moment to look at the cover. "Well, if you're thinking like that, you should just get it. You haven't bought a new book in, what, a month? Two? Just buy it. You have the money." You reasoned, shrugging. F/N bites her lip and narrows her eyes at the book, flipping it in her hand to look at the cover again.

"Hmmm- okay! I will!" F/N finalized, visibly brightening up at her decision and skipping towards the checkout counter. You watch her retreating figure and start to follow her.

Waving goodbye to the cashier, you both head out the door. It takes one block for F/N to abruptly stop, causing you to look back at her. "What's wrong?" You ask.

"My mom needs to run to the store but she doesn't want to leave my brother home alone so I have to go back and watch him." F/N looks up at you with sad, puppy dog eyes. "I'm so sorry! I really wanted to hang out with you more! I'll make it up to you, I promise."

You smile and wave her off. "Don't worry about it- when duty calls, you answer. I'll see you at school tomorrow, anyways." Your sentence was ended with F/N flinging herself onto you for a hug. "Oh thank you! You're always so understanding! Bye!" And before you knew it, F/N was racing down the cracked pavement and out of your sight.

You sigh and turn to continue your way through town. You didn't have a specific place in mind and you didn't want to go back home so you chose to just walk. Passing by a local connivence store, you decide to go in- your rumbling stomach helping you to make the decision.

Whilst flitting through the aisles trying to decide what to eat, your thoughts drift away and back to Eugene. What was someone supposed to do in this situation? Sure, you've known Eugene for years and you're basically his older sister by now, but that doesn't mean you can pry into his life like you were his actual sister.

You know that Eugene is forgetful about things when a lot is going on in his life, which doesn't help comfort the nagging fear that he's being severely bullied. Again. You sigh and limply reach for your comfort food, trudging to the cashier.

You made it ten steps before you heard your name being called out to you and a hand on your shoulder. You spun around real quick at the contact and was met with Eugene right behind you.

"H-Hey! What are you doing here? I haven't seen you in awhile." Your eyes widened at the sight of Eugene. A million thoughts raced through your mind, questions you wanted to ask and have answered.

Your eyes scanned him for any signs of bullying, happy that you found none. And then the emotions came. Sure, it hadn't been years since you two had talked last, but you grew up with the boy in front of you. You knew him inside and out. Every look, every tell, you knew. You always did. You gaped at him, "E-Eugene?! Where have you been? I haven't heard from you in weeks!"

A regretful look crossed over Eugenes face, and he sheepishly pushes up his glasses. "Yeah, I guess I haven't talked to you in a long while, huh? I have a lot to catch you up on- Actually, I can tell you everything in a second. Let's go pay so I can introduce you to some people." You quirked a brow at his change and suddenly became aware of the abundance of snacks he was carrying.

Your heart fell. A bread shuttle, again?? He led the way to the cashier, and as soon as you both had paid, he took your hand and dragged you to the door.

Eugene was babbling incoherencies but you managed to follow along. "You're going to love them! And they'll love you! Oh! Rowan's here, too! It's been a while since you two talked, right? Then he'll have to catch you up on his stories from when he was in Australia!" You would bet a million yen that your body looked like a rag doll being dragged behind Eugene.

You were in shock, Rowan was back? Why didn't you know that? How long has he been back? What does he look like now?

You and Eugene managed to leave the store in which you were abruptly blocked by a wall of orange. You looked up, and to say that you were shocked was an understatement. "Hey what took ya so long?" Someone said, punching Eugene in the shoulder. That someone, you quickly realized, was Rowan. He looked a lot different- he was way taller than you remembered and he looked older, more mature.

And his hair- you let out a little giggle which caught both Eugene's and Rowan's attention. He looked at you, confused, for a quick moment before his face lit up in realization. "Y/N? Is that you!?" Rowan's haircut looked even more ridiculous when he was facing you and you broke out laughing.

"I'm sorry. It's just- your hair. What'd you do to it?" You broke out laughing and Eugene joined in with you. Rowan was fuming, protesting while you two continued to poke fun.

"You're meaner than I remembered you to be, y/n, how could you do this?? I thought we were friends!" Rowan wailed when you finally settled down and stopped laughing. "I'm sorry, but it's good to see you again. And why haven't you bothered to tell me that you were back?" You asked, pointedly looking at him.

Before Rowan could respond, another voice interrupted you three. "Hey! You guys! What are you doing? I'm hungry!" You turn to look at the origin of the voice and reality was suddenly slammed back into you.

Is this the guy that's making Eugene be a bread shuttle? The figure catches up to your group and you take in his features. He's tall, has toned skin and reddish hair.

His dark eyes flicked to you and he faltered, about to say something. “Oh, hey, Big Ben! This is my friend, y/n, we haven’t talked in a while so I was just taking her to meet everyone.” Eugene greeted,

Big Ben’s eyes went wide. “You have friends besides us and you didn’t tell me?! Eugene, how could you!” He pouted, but that isn’t what ticked you. “Friends??” You meekly asked, looking in between the three guys in front of you.

Eugene puffed out his chest and you could see his eyes gleam when he nodded in confirmation. “Yeah! That’s who I’m trying to introduce you to. The rest of the group is gathered around the corner. Come on, guys, let’s go. I’m sure Gray and the others are waiting.”

Big Ben got over his fit and straightened up immediately, clearing his throat. He turned and lead the way down a couple blocks to a place with outdoor tables. It was kind of busy, as expected on a nice afternoon.

Towards the outside of the group of tables, you could see four boys who looked about your age. The taller one with the green hair and a shorter, black-haired guy were bickering between themselves while the other two were sitting there, watching the scene go down.

"HEY GUYS! WE'RE BACK AND WE GOT A SURPRISE!" Big Ben's loud voice startles you and you take notice of the four people now staring at you.

Coming to a halt in front of the table, you stand awkwardly next to Big Ben while Eugene passes out the contents of his plastic bag. "Guys, this is y/n, Eugene's friend!" Big Ben puts a hand on your shoulder and you nearly jump from the contact. "Y/n, this is Alex, Gray, Gerard, and Teddy." Eugene adds in, pointing to the names respective person.

You nod and manage a wave and a small smile. Gray smiles back with a simple "nice to meet you" while Gerard and Alex seem more enthusiastic to meet you. Teddy stays quiet, studying your interactions with his friends.

When Eugene was done passing out snacks, he comes to stand by you. While you knew Eugene inside and out, he also knew you inside out and meeting a bunch of new people at once wasn't your best situation to be in.

"Where'd you two meet?" Gray's voice cuts everyone else's off and you reply. "We grew up only a few doors down from each other. Our moms are friends so it was only natural for us to hang out a lot because of that."

"And then I came in and made the friendship more awesome!" Rowan exclaims coming up behind you both. You instinctively roll your eyes, "Sure you did. You keep telling yourself that, Rowan." Rowan pouts at you and you flick his forehead, laughing. "Ow! That hurt!"

"Says the one that took down a ranked Daehyeon member" Eugene mutters. Your eyes widen and you quickly spin your attention to Eugene and Rowan. "What??" You were well informed about Shuttle Patch and anything and everything else that came with it- you were friends with Eugene and Rowan, after all. "You haven't heard about Rowan's fight with Daehyeon's Eunchan?" Big Ben asks. You look at him and shake your head. "No, Eugene hasn't talked to me since the beginning of the school year so I have no idea what's going on-"

"Don't worry, I'll tell you! I was so amazing- I could take on Donald Na next!" Rowan exclaims, taking up everyone's attention with his reenactment of what happened(according to him). You ended up taking a seat halfway through Rowan's story. Gray was next to you and eventually everyone settled down into their seats.

Rowan was finishing up his story when he cut himself off. "Oh! And let's not forget about the time me and Eugene took on Wolf!" Your eyes bugged out. "Wolf Keum?!" You gasped. Rowan nodded proudly, "Yep! I decked him right in the jaw with my trusty elbow!" You squinted your eyes doubtably at him, but the red head just nodded in reassurance. "It's true! Eugene and Gray were there! Tell them!" Eugene blushed and stammered his way through his part of the story. Big Ben and eventually Gray joined in, finishing it off, and you listened intently, on the edge of your seat.

It went on like that for who knows how long. It was one story after another and by the time they were all done, the group moved on to other topics of conversation. They all made sure you were included and put your two cents in on the topic.

The next time you were aware of how much time had passed was when you noticed the sun was setting. The loud bantering and side conversations dulled in your ears as you sat back and watched everyone.

Time seemed to slow as you took in Eugene's smiling face, his demeanor felt care-free and he looked at home. Were you seeing this right? Did Eugene really, finally find his group of true friends? A safety net he can fall back on? Someone besides you? You felt a sense of relief bubble up within you, and something told you that maybe, just maybe, that the little pile of ashes that are on the floor aren't meaningless after all.

[sleptwithinthesun]

I NEED Steve reacting to Eddie’s kitten sneezes.

lmao don't we all. please enjoy a humble 1.8K fic, written straight from my goddamn soul because im insane about these two :)

It's beyond late when Steve pulls up to the Munson trailer, almost breathless with worry, shaking with the amount of pure anxiety and adrenaline in his system right now. He hates this, so much more than words will ever be able to express. The Upside Down has a special way of fucking with his psyche, pulling everything he's worked so hard to push down up to the surface and letting it breathe for the first time in years, life regained even though it was buried long ago. But for them, buried never really seems to mean dead, does it?

He pulls his Members Only jacket tighter around himself, the normally-calming night breeze biting into him. April in Hawkins is no joke, with the temperatures tending to be pleasantly cool during the day and plummeting back down during the night. As he approaches the trailer, he notices that most of the lights are still on, meaning that Eddie might still be awake. At least Steve won't be waking him up.

Three knocks on the door are all it takes for him to hear movement from inside the trailer, and he breathes out a sigh of relief as Eddie's footsteps move closer to the door. "Uncle Wayne? I thought you weren't going to be back until Thur—" He cuts himself off as soon as he sees Steve standing there, obviously taken aback. To his credit, though, his recovery is swift, even as tension bleeds into his limbs. "Oh, uh, hi. What're you... what are you doing here?"

"I'm sorry," Steve starts, drinking in the sight of Eddie. It's a relief to see him like this, messy-haired and in baggy pajamas and breathing, "for barging in on you. I just... I needed to make sure you were okay."

As soon as the words leave his mouth, he realizes how stupid they sound. He could have just picked up the phone and called him, there was no need to drive all the way over here, not really, but Steve needed to see. To confirm Eddie's safety with his own eyes.

Eddie stares at him for a moment, before nodding, a sad smile tugging at his lips. "Yeah, I get that. Do you want to come in? It's a bit of a mess since I was cleaning, but the couch is fine." He lets Steve lead the way before following, closing the door behind the two of them and locking it, like he doesn't expect Steve to leave for a while. "Are you alright?"

Steve laughs humorlessly, sitting on the couch and looking down at his clasped hands. "No, not really."

To his surprise, Eddie wastes no time taking a seat next to him. "Do you, I don't know, maybe want to talk about it? I've been told I'm a good listener."

"And who told you that?"

"Most of the people who actually talk to me," Eddie says, shrugging. "My uncle, for one. Gareth. Dustin. And, uh, that's kind of it."

Steve leans back, turning his head so that he's looking at the other man. Eddie's not quite looking at him, in a similar position to Steve's just moments previous, his blank gaze transfixed on a bottle of cleaning spray that he must have left on the coffee table. "That's still not a lot."

"Not a lot of people wanted to talk to me even before I was a fugitive, Harrington."

"Fair point," Steve concedes. "Are you sure? I don't want to, like, crash your night or whatever."

Eddie scoffs, finally glancing over at Steve, even if it just lasts for a second. "Don't worry, you're not crashing anything. So far, it's just been a party between me and the dust bunnies." At Steve's tired expression, he sobers slightly. "It can wait until tomorrow, seriously. Besides, I wasn't going to be sleeping anyway."

He brings his legs up to sit in lotus style, and weirdly enough seems comfortable in it, relaxing against the back of the couch. His slumped posture causes his T-shirt to practically swallow him. It depicts the Metallica logo, because really, what else would Eddie sleep in? His sweatpants even have tiny bolts of lightning printed all over them. "What's bugging you?"

"The Upside Down," Steve tells him, averting his gaze again, absently cracking his knuckles, one by one, as he speaks. "I don't know if you've felt it, too, but it, like... it plays with your mind, man. Makes you remember things you don't want to, things you didn't even think you could remember anymore. And I don't know, I guess I've just been a bit paranoid about it all."

"I know what that's like." He glances over, sees Eddie with that far-off look again, and looks away. "Hell, I haven't slept in almost six days because of the nightmares." His nose twitches, and he inhales sharply, breaths stuttering with what Steve assumes to be emotion. "It's all just on repeat, right? Childhood memories combined with everything that happened, warping until they're the same fucking thing and—"

"—there's no escape," Steve finishes. "Yeah. It's exactly like that."

Silence stretches between the two of them, oddly comfortable, until Eddie breaks it with a sudden gasp. "hh'hg'nxt! gKT! hih'hh'kXsht!"

"Bless you," Steve tells him, taken aback by the suddenness of the triple. In the past week, he's gotten used to Eddie's common sneezes. Sort of. He's no longer surprised by the amount of them, at least.

"Ugh, sorry," Eddie mumbles, wiping at his nose with ringless fingers. "It's all this goddamn dust from cleaning. I'm listening if you still want to talk, I promise. Might just interrupt you a couple times."

"That's alright. I didn't really have much more to say, anyway, just needed someone to talk to." He shifts his weight, leaning forward and preparing to stand. "Sorry, again, for barging in on you."

Eddie looks up from where he's rubbing at his nose, which is already turning pink near his nostrils. "Wait, are you trying to leave?"

"Um, yes?"

"Dumbass," Eddie says, shaking his head affectionately. "Stay here. It's pitch-fucking-black outside, you really think I can let you drive in good conscience? I've got a couch and a bedroom, so take your pick. Or don't, I can always choose for you." With that, he turns away and crushes another set of sneezes into his shoulder. Steve's impressed. Only six since he's been here, which has to be some kind of all-time low. Eddie was a mess in the warehouse with all the dirt and dust. "h'kTt! ktsh! nGxt!"

Steve glances around, hoping there's a tissue box in the room, and comes up empty. "Bless you."

"Thanks." He stands up, pressing his bandana against his nose, and holds out his free hand to Steve. "I'm putting you in an actual bed, okay? No arguing."

"But—"

"That's an argument. You just sealed your fate," Eddie says, grabbing his hand when Steve doesn't go for his and dragging him down the hall. "My room."

Steve huffs out a breath, allowing Eddie to guide him for a few moments before an actual argument pops into his head. "You're just going to get worse if you stay in the living room, though. I mean, you said it yourself, it's all the dust."

Eddie actually pauses at that, contemplating, then keeps moving forward. "Well, then, I suppose we'll just have to share."

Oh.

See, the thing about Eddie Munson is that while he may be lacking in actual confidence in himself, once there's an idea in his mind, there's nothing anyone can do to talk him out of it. Meaning, Steve's about to spend the rest of the night in his bed. With him.

Jesus Christ.

"Fine," he manages, shrugging his jacket off the moment Eddie lets go of his wrist, intent on getting this over with as soon as possible. While a part of him is secretly thrilled at the prospect, the majority of him is anxious as hell. Steve's pretty sure he hasn't had a good night's sleep ever since he heard Chrissy was murdered.

Steve's still in pajamas, at least, so he doesn't have to borrow any of Eddie's clothes. He drapes his jacket over the back of the chair in the room, then glances over at his apparent bedmate for the night. "Are you coming?"

"Y-yeah, just gohhtta..." He breathes slowly for a couple seconds, knuckle pressed against his nose, but still loses the fight. "Shit, fuck, oh my GohhdT'sh! gxt'uh! mpt'shh!"

"Stop stifling. For the love of God, how many times do I have to tell you this? You're just going to make it worse," Steve says, walking over to the bed and lifting the covers. Maybe this won't be so bad.

Eddie stares at him for a second, nose still twitchy. "You know what, you're bossy. Has anyone ever told you that before?"

"Sure," he says, with a private roll of his eyes before his tone softens. "Get in. You need to sleep too, Eddie."

"Yeah, yeah, I know." Eddie grumbles as he crosses over to the bed, grabbing a tissue on the way and quietly blowing his nose. There's a whole box of them on the floor, Steve realizes, carefully placed so that they're within easy reach, with a small wire trash can right next to them. "I'm glad you're staying."

He exhales slowly as Eddie turns off the lights. "I am, too," he admits to the ceiling.

"I'm glad that you're glad," Eddie says, sliding into bed next to him.

"Don't get all sappy on me now, Munson."

"Me? Sappy? Unheard of."

Steve laughs quietly, the last sound before they both start settling down. Now that he's in bed with the lights off, all the exhaustion he's been carrying around finally sinks into him, and he wants nothing more than to sleep. He's almost there, too, when Eddie suddenly crumples with an actual fit of uncovered sneezes.

"h'iTshh'uh! ik'tsCh! hih'kshh! kSHh! Fuck, sorry— h'isHh! ishH'uh!" He's panting by the end of it, sniffling back sudden congestion and barely even noticing what he's just revealed.

"Are you kidding me?" Steve asks, pushing himself up on his elbow. "You've been stifling all this time for that?"

He can only imagine the quizzical look Eddie's sending him. "Fuck, Eddie, that's adorable. You sound like a kitten. I mean, that's barely even different from when you stifle, Christ, why do you even bother?"

"Shut up," Eddie whines, rolling over so that he's facing Steve and poking him on the face, landing just to the side of the incredulous smile that's gracing his face. "Go to sleep."

Miracles upon miracles, he does end up sleeping through the night. And when he wakes up in the morning, Eddie is curled into his side, sinuses swollen and exhaling wheezily before Steve pulls him out of the dust-ridden trailer and into the fresh April air so that he can actually breathe.

[yutaholic]

Jungwoo/Mark’s tweet earlier got me sooo mad I was heated again like so quick after the nj concert the very next day you’re like “back to koreaaaaa💚” like I’m upset bc i am into 2 other groups, all of which I’ve supported since their respective debuts (except for the fact that I’d been around and waited for neos since 2014 smrookies…since their fucking name sounded like a citation in a legal contract, SR14B! That’s right, all the way from Florida, I’ve been down for them since before THEY WERE EVEN “THEM”, THEIR DAMN SELVES!! I remember when Haechan spelled his birth name without a ‘c’ in it, you little muskrats, i— anyway ) but 80% of my attention time and money for the last few years has been to nct, including superm. First it was it was like 50-55%, then it progressed a couple years ago to 65-75, now here we are. To the point that I still care about my favs but all I talk about & most of I listen to & only I voted for, has been nct. On top of that, I’m Black. And was most active on Twitter. Do y’all know how hard it is to be a black ifan to these mfs for over half a decade, sometimes I wonder if im in my right mind cus part of me lookin in the mirror like “bitch u sure u good over there?🤨” 😭

The confidence…the gall, the audacity, the mf TEMERITY of these people to either not gaf enough about the majority of their fans that they’ll pussyfoot around and kiss the feet of Korean nctzens so much that they are actively disrespecting us. A few of them lurk, I know they do, esp Ty. ik cus he’s my bias & what he texts in bubble proves he knows things he wouldn’t be aware of without looking at our tweets. I am so upset with him & I have never been mad enough about anything he’s done as I am rn. If you’ve seen anything Tyongf have said, you know we are a little shocked and a lot disappointed. I’d planned to say sumn but that video showing he was insecure in his position came out so I used my allotted texts on that but the minute he sends smth (3 replies allowed per message of the artist) it’s ON, on.

I remember superhuman era quite well but what strikes me is how large the treatment gap has widened since then. There came to a time where we were lowered another peg (cus we knew we weren’t equal) to please and appease kfans. Then it’s gotten worse and worse when their fandom size jump quite a bit with Kick It but EXPONENTIALLY abroad with Sticker & favorite last year. But the acknowledgement has been less! How long does sm think we will sit & take this from them before we find another group that doesn’t mistreat their fans abroad lmao. One of those I’m into is BTS. Do you think I would’ve been calling radio stations regularly to get & then keep their songs on there, buying the albums in store to help with physicals and doing all the other projects if they treated intl army like NCT treats nctzens outside of Korea🧐?!?? Does NCT and sm think GRAMMY NOMINATIONS came to BTS twice by intl armys getting treated like second class citizens?! LMAOOO chile they have bumped their damn heads.

Atp I want Chris Lee and some other people’s heads on pikes!! Whoever make them type of decisions to shun us!! They really bending over backwards for people who tanked their entire era in anger bc American fans got fan service like taking pics with them on the street & shit?? That just shows how shallow they can be! Clown asses! Usually I’m like “Bubu don’t go on Twitter there aren’t good things there” but rn I’m sooo close to going off that it got me boutta text him to go on Twitter & exactly what to search if he wanna see whats really good in the fandom rn. I’m tired of being understanding & acting like I’m fine and is being the bigger person. I want to evoke emotions, I want them feel upset and worry and FEAR👹 It sounds unhinged and petty but I want them for even just a MINUTE, to have a bodily experience of fright and sadness and the realization that we very can leave in droves! But not boycotting an era and cursing them out, oh no, by legitimately just dropping them. That we CAN leave their asses silently and put another group on the map. We can drop not just the unit but the whole brand, ending that nct Hollywood bullshit RIGHT NOW if they don’t appreciate us being around. We don’t expect to be superior just at least toe the mf line??

It’s funny, they call us grass sometimes bc of our light sticks. I’m all about not feeling insecure or conflicted in the past but…These days? I’d thoroughly enjoy them having an “oh shit…” feeling of despair, and epiphany that if they don’t water ALL the “grass” in their yard, there WILL be noticeably large patches of nothing but dirt and dead plants.

I need you to know that I thoroughly enjoyed reading this ask. You have a way with words. I could feel the rage through my screen. I also felt like I was being scolded even though I did nothing wrong. You know how like when you're in the room and your friend is getting chewed tf out by their mom? That's how I felt for a hot minute lol

I said in an earlier ask that all this ncity discourse has me feeling like I'm on the couch with a bag of popcorn watching my bestie fight with her boyfriend. You are now that bestie and I will cheer you on while you read our men to filth. 👏 also hell yes kill nct hollywood early so we never gotta deal with that shit! hahahaha

[minilpark]

Hi🎀

Could you do a list of your Head Canons for Coyote as your husband?

Hes so cute i love him🥺🥺

Thanks!!🧚🏻‍♀️

i will do my best to give you some good hcs of coyote! i hope you enjoy :")

i fully believe this man has a big family and he's one of the older siblings (not the oldest maybe like 3rd out of 6 or 7) so he's had to help out with chores around the house and taking care of his younger siblings

so when you two got married, he was totally prepared to take care of you

of course you insisted that this relationship should be 50/50 where you two split the chores etc.

that really doesn't stop him though

if he sees you're feeling down, out of it, or just tired, he is more than willing to pick up the slack

house is spotless. dirty dishes? he's on them and he's playing music while washing them to pass the time. laundry needs to be done? he's loading it into the washer- you need to start cooking dinner? he's there to help you out

honestly a godsend he is peak house husband

he is definitely the type to sing/dance with you in the kitchen while you two cook dinner don't question me on this

he also loves a breakfast in bed type moment

despite his job not allowing him to be home with you as often as he wants, he still does his best to do his part

besides the grunt work of the relationship, javy is definitely in tune with your emotions

if he senses something- anything off, he puts whatever he's doing down and asks you if you'd like to talk about it

of course, you don't have to but he always reminds you he is available to listen because he doesn't want you to feel troubled

and if you're emotionally available, he asks if he can talk to you about his problems (which mainly concern things at work lmao)

speaking of work, he knows it can get frustrating when he's gone for a while so to make it up to you, on his off days he takes you out or you two stay in to spend quality time together

he also definitely introduces you to everyone if you arent already familiar with them

i feel like you and jake would become besties since he is one of the people who are really close to javy

anyways another thought is, before he goes off for missions he never says goodbye it's always "i'll see you as soon as i can" and he gives you a kiss (or a couple) before heading off

he also keeps a pic of you two (from one of your first dates) in his flight suit just as motivation and a reminder to make it home to you as safely as he can

oh i definitely think when you two start getting serious about potentially starting a family, he moves from being a fighter pilot to having more of a leading position, he just wants to be more considerate of your family

oh my god wait speaking of family, his family adores you

whenever you two have enough time to visit them (i saw a hc the other day that said his family is from nc and i fully agree not just because im also a north carolinian but he totally gives the vibes- anyways), they always plan a cookout- food is definitely the love language of the machado family,,

his siblings always check in on how you're doing and how well he treats you

sometimes you tease that he might not be doing his job well and then his momma scolds him lmao

it's all in good fun though

and despite it feeling like you two just got there, suddenly a week has gone by and it's time to head back home

everyone is sad of course because they love you two so much, but they're already planning for the next visit :")

[purrvaire]

so. this is going to be a personal post, free to skip etc

cw // grieving

today it's my granny's bday. she passed away in July - she would be 93 today - after being sick for quite sometime. and i guess im feeling it particularly bc life has been absurd and i didnt have much time for processing when it happened - i had to help mum sort out stuff before and after the funeral, uni exams of course didn't stop for me. like, i realized i have troubles dealing with it bc i gathered the courage to watch the last video mum took of her - the day before she passed - only yesterday and it hurt so bad. anyway, i don't want to wallow in painful memories so ill tell you some of the happy ones <3

me and my grandma were very close; she lived with me while i was growing up and we used to share a room; she had her quirks, mind you, my sister and her would fight a lot and, as always, i was left to placate both of them lol but the thing is, she was always ready to listen. when i came back from school, i would tell her all about my day and my friends. in the last months i needed to repeat her stuff bc her memory failed her a bit. and she helped me as far as she could with school or, when she wasn't able bc she finished school at 15, she would listen. And she was so interested in what I was learning! Istg I prepared a whole ass exam about linguistics and she wanted to hear all about it! When I had exams, she would comfort me the day before and she was the first person I would call after bc I knew she would be waiting anxiously for me to call. Actually, I had an exam at the end of July and I got the top mark (30 e lode, which I guess is A+? Idk) and I had to stop myself from calling her number, it was so automatic the routine we had.

When she could still read easily, we used to read books together; we read the Secret Garden and Wuthering Heights and Pride and Prejudice and Anne of Green Gables - the last one was the topic of my undergraduate dissertation which I dedicated to her.

AND my old lady was such a great football fan! NO BUT SERIOUSLY she wouldn't miss a match, we supported the same team of course and she would get fond of players too LMAO the night she was hospitalised, I remember she didn't want to leave home because - and I quote - she was busy watching the Champions League. I get it from her. In fact, this year, chances are that my team could win the league after 30+ years and it's bittersweet, you know? Knowing that she isn't there to enjoy it.

Anyway, I'm typing this while I'm waiting at the hairdresser - she liked my hair long and was sad when I cut it but anyway she believed it suited me - and tomorrow I'm taking a plane to Belgium to visit a friend; I'm telling you bc I can't tell her. She was very religious - as all old southern italian ladies are - while I'm not so much anymore, but just for today I'll believe she is watching me from up there. 🤍

[freedomfireflies]

ok so i’m sorry for rambling but you’re such a safe account and i feel like i have to get this out somehow 😭 so well, last year i was supposed to go to italy with my parents which i was so excited for and literally couldn’t wait, i was dreaming about going back there for year and was just so happy that we’re gonna go there, everything was ready when well, our car broke down when we were still in the country and had to go back. i was so sad and angry for days, i still have some trauma with it ig, idk it just angered me so bad lmao and anyway this year we’re planning to go again in just a few days which is rather spontaneous and we are going this exact same route we had planned for last year. well, technically the car is fixed but it’s been constantly a disaster, my dad had to bring it to the mechanic multiple times in just a few months. and i have like massive ocd and intrusive thoughts and i always feel like i can’t be too excited for something because then it’ll ruin it and something will go wrong but i also feel like i can’t be too negative cause i’m gonna jinx it. 😭 long story short, im just so anxious and i want this to work out this time so bad, i don’t know what to do. i know it’s silly as hell but it’s really bugging me lol you obvs don’t have to answer me or anything if you don’t want to, i just sort of had to get this off my chest 😭 thank you for reading

Hi!!! I'm gonna answer this here, but if you're not comfortable with that, let me know, and I will take it down ASAP!!

First of all, I'm so glad you feel safe here! You never have to apologize for needing to get something off your chest, and I will always be here to listen!!

Second, this makes perfect sense! Trauma and coping methods can manifest in many different ways and forms. It makes sense that you'd be hesitant about reliving something that caused you so much stress!

I was once stranded in the middle of nowhere with no cell service for six miles, and believe me, I was not too quick to get back in that car going forward!

It's not at all silly to hope that this trip is what you want it to be and that there are no repeats of the last time! Unfortunately, our brains are gonna think things we wish they wouldn't. But...if you can find a way to pull yourself back, distract yourself from going down that rabbit hole, and find a way to accept that whatever happens is gonna happen...you might be okay!

I know that's easier said than done, but sometimes we just have to take each day one tiny baby step at a time. Focus on getting from Point A to Point B. And once you're there, you did it! You can check it off the list and feel good about what you did! Now...you focus on the next task to complete! And if you have to trick yourself into thinking about literally anything else (like looking at cute gifs of Harry, or reading something juicy, or playing some good music), that's okay!

Again, I know this doesn't magically fix anything, and it might not end up being a solution that works for you but...you are not a jinx! You are doing the best you can and I'm proud of you!! 💞 This trip will be wonderful! And if there are some bumps along the way, they'll be stories to tell one day!

[jimimn]

as a very wise man once said: i don't have think.

no but actually what the fuck? first of all, he's drop dead gorgeous, but like we all knew that. i couldn't see much of the outfits, but what i could see.. yeah, let's not talk about it lmao

and also, the way he has been saying it for months (since this was shot last year) how he wants to show a raw side of his? and we have no idea what to expect?? and now you reblogged that post with Freud's theory?? i googled it (and this is like a 2 minute research so yeah), but not only is it part of the mind that contains sexual drives, but it also deals with meeting the basic needs (like it seeks gratification for our wants and needs, which could be sexual but also could be just like 'i'm hungry'), so i have no clue what to expect from him?? there are references to artemis too, goddess of moon and hunting (hence the deer antlers)?? this teaser has so MANY LAYERS ALREADY and we have barely seen anything.

i'm honestly terrified of his album because in my opinion there is only so much you can do during a photoshoot but with songs and lyrics, and a music video you can do so much more... i don't think we are ready for anything he wants to show us but i'm so excited for when his album comes. his older songs are already so different from each other, imagine what he could do with new ones. he said in the festa dinner that they couldn't show us everything, and that's a sad thing (but understandable and necessary), but he said it so many times that he wants to show more of himself. i'm very curious of the jimin he wants us to see.

i wanted to say he is in his dom/bdsm era but after listening to his explanation i will no longer say this also tae has been very quiet since the video dropped lmao the tannies probably have all seen each other's photos already, but still. i know he's clutching his phone at home

-🦋

he put so much thought into this it makes my brain go brrrrrrrrrrrr. he keeps saying its his raw side and the concept is his inner self and its his original self .. im just so in awe. i really wish i had better words 😭 his thought process and his visualization is so deep and he’s so damn intelligent and knowledgeable. he’s kind of, i think, getting a little bolder (for the lack of a better word) in terms of what he wants to show and it is setting my brain on fire because yeah we have no idea what to expect from him, even music wise and not just for this particular shoot. and like you said, JUST the teaser has dropped and it has so many layers already 😭😭😭 jimin has put so much thought into this god. and yes yes I agree! thats the thing we have no idea what to expect from his music either because jimin has a lot of range i think bc promise and christmas love and friends are such different sounds and so are his solos in the albums. he said in the LV vlive (when they were talking about with you) that he wants to try a lot of different things. im so excited to see what he does in the future. honestly even if its something simple, im excited to hear it anyway because it will be ‘jimin’. i hope you get what im trying to say hdjfhdj. AND PLSDHJDHJ i read that on twitter too after just the picture teasers were out from the scans 😭 also omg that look (from the scans) the leather pants and the antlers, that was nowhere to be seen in the teaser 😳 please i need everything soon i can’t wait 😭😭 AND PLS LMAOOOOOO TAE LEFT AS SOON AS THE VIDEO DROPPED ur so right tho tae is just like us: whipped for jimin <3