#apple needs a chicken nugget emoji | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

Visit Blog

Explore Tumblr blogs with no restrictions, modern design and the best experience.

Fun Fact

Total funding amounts to $125.3M.

#apple needs a chicken nugget emoji

thesunflowerprince · 3 years

Text

Little Kageyama headcanons ✨

— he loves being called buttercup and angel

— his little age is 1-3

— he isn’t very big on stuffies, but he does have a few that he loves a lot

— he hates regressing in front of people and sometimes he needs a little push

— he told his team he was little to avoid any unnecessary confusion later, but it actually ended up being really good to know, since they love taking care of their little boy

— he won’t admit it, but his favourite caregivers are Tanaka and Sugawara

— he is the loudest little boy

— his favourite bottle is covered in penguins

— he loves my little pony and Apple Jack is his favourite

— his favourite thing to do when he’s little is to build a fort and then proceed to sleep, eat, and watch cartoons in the fort for the rest of the day

— usually after games he regresses on the bus ride back

— he loves being carried

— his favourite drink is strawberry milk

— he needs a pacifier or else he chews on his fingers

— he bounces a lot when he’s happy or excited

— he absolutely loves chicken nuggets

— when he has to text, he uses a ton of emojis. Sometimes they don’t even make sense, he just likes them

— he’ll play dead if he wants his caregiver to carry him to bed (cause who wants to walk all the way to bed?? Not Kageyama, that’s who)

— he has great manners

— sometimes he doesn’t listen very well and wants to do his own thing

— he loves to play with his caregivers fingers like they’re piano keys

— he loves animals, especially dogs and rodents

— his ideal little date would be a picnic with ham and cheese sandwiches

#Haikyuu agere #little kageyama

51 notes · View notes

theladyofdeath · 4 years

Text

Alone in the Ashes {24}

A Court of Thorns and Roses fanfction, characters belong to Sarah J Maas. Modern au. Revolves around Nesta x Cassian, Feyre x Rhysand, and Elain x Azriel. Other characters appear throughout. Based on multiple prompts sent in by anons tbr below.

Warning: Mature content. Alcohol abuse, verbal abuse, drugs, sex, language, eating disorders.

For summary & chapter index, click > Alone in the Ashes {Acotar}

Word Count: 2.6k

A/N: Remember that one time when Lucas and Nathan faced off on the rivercourt for Peyton’s affection? Yeah. Good times.

Anyways, even I said “What the fuck” at the end of this chapter...Enjoy “The one before the finale”. x

“I'd always thought death would be some sort of peaceful homecoming - a sweet, sad lullaby to usher me into whatever waited afterward.” ― Sarah J. Maas, A Court of Wings and Ruin

“Lain?”

It was the week before Rhysand and Feyre’s wedding, and everyone was going out to celebrate. All but Elain, who offered to stay home with Mila so that Azriel could enjoy himself. He’d been on edge too often, lately. He needed a good night out.

Besides, Elain was pregnant and nauseous and the last thing she wanted to do was be out with a bunch of people when she couldn’t drink and was too damn tired to dance.

“Yes?” Elain asked from where she was perched on the other side of the couch.

“Is the baby in your belly a boy or a girl?”

Elain chuckled. “We don’t know yet. What do you want the baby to be?”

Mila took a minute to think about it. “I don’t care. I just want someone to play with.”

Elain’s smile softened. “Well, soon enough, baby will be here.”

“I be a big sister?” she asked, with hope in her sweet, innocent eyes.

“Sure will,” Elain confirmed. “The best big sister!”

“Is Uncle Azzie going to marry you?” Mila asked. “Like Rhysie and Feyre.”

“Maybe,” Elain said, in all honesty. “But not right now.”

“I want you to marry Uncle Azzie,” Mila said, sighing as she pet Elain’s cat, Ginger. “We could all live together in a big house. Me, you, Uncle Az, and baby.”

Elain watched Mila as she kissed the kitten’s forehead. “I would like that, too.”

“Good,” Mila beamed. “Can we watch t.v.?”

“It’s getting late,” Elain said, huffing a laugh, a hand on her stomach. The morning sickness wasn’t as bad, but it tended to linger throughout the day.

“Please?” Mila sang, big eyes pleading.

“Alright, but only for a little while,” Elain said. “When i say it’s time for bed, it’s time for bed.”

Mila jumped up on the couch, arms in the air. “Yay!”

Elain turned the station to a kid’s show as she pulled out her phone and texted Azriel, What did this child have for lunch? She has enough energy for all of us.

Azriel’s reply came a second later. Chicken nuggets.

Then, it was followed by, A cherry icee might have happened, too.

Elain laughed to herself as she typed out, Oh, good. Get her all sugared up then leave her with the pregnant woman.

“Lain, do you have ice cream?”

Elain shook her head. “How about an apple?”

Mila groaned. “Fine.”

As Elain went into the kitchen, her phone vibrated in her hoodie pocket. Azriel had said, I can always come home. I’m only ten minutes down the road if you need me.

Have fun, Elain had texted back. Enjoy yourself. We’re good over here. After adding a green heart emoji, she pressed send.

After washing an apple and cutting it into slices, Elain walked back into the living room, where Mila was snoring, using Ginger as a pillow. Shaking her head, Elain took her place at the other end of the couch.

When she pulled her phone out of her pocket, it read, Kiss Mila and the baby goodnight for me.

Elain’s cheeks turned pink as she smiled. Every night, Azriel pressed his soft lips to Elain’s stomach, to the bump that had formed there.

I will, Elain had typed back. Always.

~~~~~~

“I feel bad for leaving Elain,” Feyre frowned. “She deserves to have fun, too.”

“She offered,” Nesta reminded her. “Besides, she’s been up at the crack of dawn puking her guts up. The woman needs to take sleep when she can find it.”

Feyre agreed before taking another shot.

Shots were on Mor, and the rounds kept coming. Feyre had already texted Rhysand once, to see where Cassian and Azriel were taking him, but he had replied that he didn’t know, that it was a surprise, and that he was scared shitless because any surprise that involved Cassian was asking for trouble.

Feyre didn’t disagree.

“One week from today,” Amren began, eyes bright, intoxicated, “you’ll be a married woman.”

“Any idea where you’re going for the honeymoon?” Mor asked. “Rhys let anything slip?”

“Not a thing,” Feyre groaned. “And it’s been driving me crazy.”

“Any guesses?” Nesta asked.

Feyre took a second to think about it. Yes, she had guessed a few times over the past weeks, but Rhysand had let nothing slip. “My guess is Adriata. He knows I love the beach.”

And even now, as Autumn was beginning, Adriata was as warm and sunny as ever. But every time Feyre had guessed as much, Rhysand just shrugged and said, Guess you’ll have to wait and find out.

The handsome bastard.

“You know what we should do?” Mor asked, then looked to Nesta. “Designated driver, pull the car around, please. We have to get the bride prepared for her honeymoon.”

Feyre groaned, but Nesta was already on her feet, hurrying out the door.

Five minutes later, they were gathered together in Nesta’s car, driving down Main Street.

“Where are you taking me now?” Feyre asked, exasperated.

“You’ll see,” Mor crooned.

The endless list of surprises was about to drive Feyre insane.

They pulled up to a little lingerie shop and dragged Feyre out of the car.

“Is this necessary?” she asked. “Rhysand prefers me naked.”

Mor rolled her eyes as Amren said, “You can’t go on your honeymoon without a solid selection of overpriced lingerie.”

Feyre laughed, unable to argue as they entered the shop.

The room was filled with lace and silk, varying in styles and choices.

“Fine,” Feyre sighed. “Everyone pick out something and I’ll get it, no questions asked, but after this, we drink!”

Feyre was answered with laughter and hollering as she crashed in a chair near the dressing room.

She would be married, Rhysand’s wife, in one week. It almost didn’t seem real. Everything was going so well, so smoothly, so beautifully, even with the rushed planning.

One week, with her girls by her side, and apparently a bag packed full of lingerie, ready to go wherever the hell Rhys was taking her after the ceremony... She would be her best friend’s wife.

~~~~~

The back of Cassian’s truck was down, a twelve pack of shitty beer sat on the unhitched gate, and rock music poured from the radio as the three friends played basketball on the small court along the Sidra.

Rhysand’s mom used to take the three of them there, from the time they were in middle school and fell in love with the sport. It had always been a safe haven, so it made sense why his two closest friends would gather an ass-ton of beer and take him to the court for some bonding before he got hitched in a week.

Cassian had a beer can pressed to his lips as he dribbled the ball to the free-throw line.

“Anything new about Eris?” He asked.

Azriel cleared his throat. “No, but Amarantha calls and leaves a voicemail every other day, claiming the prick won’t give up. Which, I believe. Eris isn’t the type to be told he can’t have something and drop it.”

Azriel had gone to court a few days prior, and Eris had left furious after he’d been granted nothing. It was a win, but Rhysand could tell Azriel’s worry lingered.

“No matter what happens, she’s going to get older, you know? Eventually, she’ll have questions about them both, and I’m going to be the bad guy for saying, your mom’s in prison, and your dad’s a dick. Sorry, can’t see either of them.”

“Doesn’t make you a bad person for wanting to protect her,” Rhysand said. Cassian raised his beer in agreement.

“So I hear,” he mumbled, and surely Elain had been constantly telling him the same thing. “Nervous?” Azriel asked, where he stood beneath the hoop, undoubtedly hoping to get the conversation off of him.

“About playing against Cassian?” Rhysand asked. “Hardly.”

Azriel chuckled. “About getting married, dumbass.”

Rhysand grinned. “Not really. Nothing to be nervous about.”

People were still around, the sun yet to have completely sink down, walking or jogging along the walk by the river. None of them seemed to care that they were drinking in a public area, or that their music was obnoxiously loud.

“I’d be nervous,” Cassian muttered, throwing his empty can at his truck bed - and completely missing.

“If you were marrying Nesta?” Rhysand asked. “Fuck, any man would be nervous. Or, you know, completely terrified.”

Cassian snorted, but didn’t deny it. “About getting married in general. Everyone staring up at you, watching you stare lovingly into each other’s eyes as you proclaim your love…”

Azriel laughed, taking the ball away from Cassian and dribbling it up to half court. “That’s bullshit, you love attention.”

Cassian’s grin only widened. Rhysand said nothing as he watched Azriel dribble up to the three point line, all he could do is laugh as Cassian took a step forward to block his shot, but stumbled.

And yet, Azriel shot the ball and it missed the backboard by a foot.

Maybe they’d all had more to drink than they had thought.

But none of them chased that ball as it rolled off the court, and out onto the grass, near the riverwalk.

Where a young man picked it up, saw Rhysand, Cassian, and Azriel, and grinned.

So did his companion.

Rhysand froze, and Cassian started charging forward, but Azriel quickly grabbed him by the shirt and pulled him back.

Tamlin chuckled. “That’s right, control your bitch.”

He and Eris stopped at the edge of the court.

Those walking past must have sensed the tension, because they began receiving strange looks as they stood atop the court in silence.

And yet, they all kept walking past.

“I hear you’re getting married next week,” Tamlin went on, strutting onto the court, ball bouncing on the concrete. “I suppose I should congratulate you. And my beautiful Feyre.”

Rhysand said nothing, but Cassian spat, “Leave.”

“How about we play?” Eris suggested, but he was looking at Azriel. “It’s been a while since we played.”

“You’re not welcome here,” Azriel said.

“Where is my daughter, by the way?” Eris said, looking around. “With your whore, no doubt.”

Now it was Cassian’s turn to grab Azriel by the arm. It only made Eris’s grin wider and far more wicked.

“We don’t want trouble,” Rhysand said, plainly. “Give us our ball back and go.”

Tamlin did no such thing. “I think a game would be fun. Me and Eris against Cassian and Az. Rhysand, you could referee. Wouldn’t want you getting injured so close to your big day. Feyre will need you to be able to...perform. We all know how needy she is in bed, especially on her wedding night.”

Rhysand’s jaw hardened. “Why are you here, Tam?”

“We were walking by,” he said, shrugging. “We can’t stop and say hello?”

“No,” Cassian said, plainly.

“Then perhaps we’ll stop and say hello at the wedding, instead,” Tamlin crooned. “I hear it’s not far from here. By the woods, along the Sidra…”

“If you show up at the wedding-” Rhysand growled, but he was cut off.

“You’ll what?” Eris laughed. “Ask us to leave like you’re doing now? How’s that approach working for you?”

“I’ll handle it,” Cassian said, voice low. “And, considering the state I left you two in after our last encounter, you know that’ll end.”

Eris’ smile faded. “You were lucky, filled with that unholy rage that’s landed you in a jail cell more times than I can count.”

Cassian took a step forward, and this time, Azriel didn’t stop him. “You know what you’re problem is?” Cassian asked, looking between the two of them. “You grow up, spoiled, getting everything you’ve ever wanted, and now, you have this unwavering entitlement that makes you think you’re fucking invincible.” He took another step forward. “But you’re not. One day, you’ll get what’s coming to you, and your daddys won’t be there to help you out.”

Tamlin grinned as he met Cassian in the lane, closing the distance between them. “Spoken like a true bastard, who killed his own mommy and whose daddy didn’t want him.”

Cassian’s body went still.

Azriel’s face went pale.

Yes, Cassian had a lot of anger. And that anger came from somewhere. And that somewhere was just declared, outright, from Tamlin’s mouth.

Cassian didn’t talk about it, but Rhysand and Azriel knew. In high school, Cassian had found his mother dead in their living room. Then, unable to handle the pain of loss, he fled for weeks and no one saw him. The rumors that came from that were unbearable. But that’s all they were, of course, fucked up rumors.

That Rhysand was certain Tamlin and Eris had been the ones to spread.

“You need to leave,” Rhysand warned.

But Tamlin didn’t move.

Nor did Eris.

Instead, Eris pulled a small knife out of his pocket and flicked it open. He used the sharp tip to clean the dirt out from under his fingernails.

Utter rage consumed Azriel’s face.

That man was Mila’s father.

Cassian was unleashed.

He instantly tackled Tamlin to the ground, Cassian’s fist colliding with his jaw. Then Eris was on the move, charging at Azriel, but he stood his ground.

Rhysand’s can fell out of his hand, spilling across the pavement as he moved toward them, one foot in front of the other, to where Tamlin now had Cassian held down, just barely, by his throat.

What happened after that was a blur of blood and chaos.

Women who walked past walked by quickly, and a few men eventually came to try and break it up, but they were only swept into the fight themselves.

It became an all out war.

“Call the police!” a woman yelled, and Rhysand had hardly heard her above the madness surrounding him, above the pounding in his ears.

He had just brought a man down that had gotten him good in the nose when Rhysand spun around, and saw it.

Eris had Azriel pinned against the ground by his knees, one hand holding his face still, the other holding that knife to Azriel’s neck.

Azriel laid perfectly still, breathing hard. Any movement, and the blade would get him.

Rhysand screamed Eris’ name, but when he started to run that direction, he was caught by a random jogger who threw him against the court. Cassian was still tumbling around with Tamlin, completely unaware of what was happening outside of their feud.

It was then that a middle-aged man, who should have been nowhere near the court, stepped behind Eris and tried to haul him off of Azriel.

But Eris was strong, much stronger. He pulled the knife away from Azriel’s neck, only to push the man down with such force that Rhysand could hear him hit the concrete. Rhysand was already on his feet, moving as quickly as he could toward the scene, but he was still too far away.

Azriel took Eris’ distraction to his advantage, though. He grabbed the knife from Eris’ hand and stabbed him in the side. Eris cried out in agony, but Azriel was pushing Eris off of him, and was hurrying to the middle-aged man lying on the concrete, hazel eyes full of horror.

“Call a fucking ambulance!” he screamed, his voice so loud, so panicked, that the fight surrounding them began to dissipate.

Even Tamlin looked at the sight, looked at Azriel hovering over the man, in horror.

Because he knew that man.

Cassian’s face paled as he dropped Tamlin to the concrete and, blood running from his nose, ran to his truck for his phone.

Because lying on the ground, still as stone, was Isaac Archeron.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

tag List (to be tagged, comment or send me an ask!)

@throne-of-ashes-and-beauty @starkovsnesta @redisriding @photofeesh

@mariamuses @tswaney17 @amaranthas-whore @awesomelena555

@danika-defendyr @rachaels14 @faequeenaelin @theshadowsinger-and-thefawn

@hashtolanashoba @poisonous00 @chemicha @samotita

@mynewdreamwasyou @humming-asong

@candid-confetti @awkward-avocado-s @sensitiveillyrian

@my-fan-side @queen-of-glass @stars-falling

@ifangirlninja @sleeping-and-books @burritowithfeels

@morebooks-pls @kindofawalkingpoem

@sannelovesreading @empressnesrynfaliq

@halstudies @sleeping-and-books @alwayss-reading

@amren-courtofdreams @b00kworm

@wifeofchrishemsworth @booksstorm

@goldr0ses @blackjacks-donuts

@humanexile @over300books

@booksbooksbooksworld @starrynightsbooks

@girl-who-reads-the-books @mockingjayusa

@mis-lil-red @mini-monster-amren

@shhhimreading03 @brittneym15

@emilyrose111294 @queen-of-glass

@negativenesta @keshavomit

@argentumstella @sebxstianbarnes

@itsme-malin

@flora-and-fae

@feyrethedarklady

@starryandbooks

@gingerglides @candid-confetti

@gloriouspaintercreatorbandit @iliketoasterstrudels

@6255igntm @moondancer-204

@littlehoneyybee @acourtofbookworms

@the-regal-warrior

@awkward-avocado-s @nightcourtcinnamonroll

@aelin-rowan-whitehorn @bamchickawowow

@julemmaes @itsme-malin

@regular-nessian-trash @made-of-stardust-and-wanderlust

@ugh-avila @awkward-avocado-s

@superspiritfestival @the-dark-swan @girlgotattitude448 @eversincebeirut

@midnightrose-reader @lord-douglas-the-third @thestarguidingyouhome

@empress-ofbloodshed @starkovsnesta @nickjgoodsell

Prompts:

{ “I’m gonna fuck you so hard that you forget you ever met that asshole” - Feysand } -anonymous

{ “How about Nessian needing to fake date when they go home for the holidays?!” } - anonymous

{ “could u pls do like an elriel fic where azriel is like this mysterious bad boy and elain is a goody two shoes lik aaaaa i cant get that image out of my head” } - anonymous

#acotar #acomaf #acowar #acofas #sjm #fanfic #fanfiction #nessian #feysand #elriel #tacmc aita

227 notes · View notes

chubbletea · 3 years

Text

https://www.change.org/p/apple-the-world-needs-a-chicken-nugget-emoji?recruiter=false&utm_source=share_petition&utm_medium=copylink&utm_campaign=share_petition

#that's it #that's the post

4 notes · View notes

plumbobteasociety · 7 years

Note

If you were a family, who's the Mom and Dad? Aunt? Cousin? Creepy kid next door?

Deetron is dad. Dad has lots of puns and always makes us smile, she’s the backbone of the group and always inspired us to keep doing better.

Tea is mom, the most caring sweetest loving person on the planet. She keeps us sane and separates us when we fight.

Grouch is the aunt who shows up half drunk and sits outside smoking and cussing about the neighbors.

Noire is the precious baby of the family.

Nolan is the cute girl next door with impeccable style.

Mama is the woke cousin who stays up late playing video games.

Femme is the cool aunt with the awesome dog who worries too much about everything but is adorable.

Deelite is the cool neighbor who always has cookies and pickles.

Sjane is the really cool older cousin who bridged the gap between kids and adults, and who gives you mix tapes you never asked for.

Mags is the cool, intimidating, sarcastic cousin who’s really just joking around.

Picky is the sleepy oldest sibling who keeps dragging her siblings around fixing our mistakes.

Apple is the goofball sister who is cute and always photographs well, and always has emojis and strange facts when we need em.

Mlys is the overthinking, introspective exchange student who feels like a member of the family.

Martine is the boy-crazy, adventurous cousin who always manages to put herself in strange situations and send a message to one of us in a random moment to tell that she’s lost in the middle of a forest.

Zee is the trendy aunt who is well traveled but sassy and would buy us beer, but who warns us not to get the chicken nuggets.

HSL is the teacher who ended up being a friend of the family.

Simplesimmer is the caring godmother.

Java is the precious soft cousin who is always there to listen and always has perfectly matching outfits, too good for this world.

#anonymous #tea time #pts tea time #pts

47 notes · View notes

news-mashable-yahoopartner-blog · 5 years

Text

I don't miss being single, but I do miss swiping

In our Love App-tually series, Mashable shines a light into the foggy world of online dating. Just in time for cuffing season.

There was a time in my life when I wanted nothing more than to get off dating apps.

Back when I was in my twenties, I thought that dating apps were the end of our culture and the precipitating factor behind all my pain. Too sad to get up in the morning? It's probably because XxGothGirlxX never responded to my very funny OkCupid message that referenced Foxfire (seriously, who else could she find who knew that movie?). Too anxious to eat? Well, that's because I wasn't getting enough Tinder matches. Everyone on there was clearly threatened by my extraordinarily clever bio.

The truth was that dating apps could make me sad, but they could also provide intense, immensely satisfying bursts of narcissistic pleasure.

Some part of me will always long for my swiping days of yore.

SEE ALSO: House hunting apps make me want to gouge my eyes out

To be clear (especially to my girlfriend who is probably reading this post right now), I don't long for being single at all. There are people who are perfectly happy living life without a partner and that's wonderful. I, however, am not one of them.

I don't miss the days of microwaving Morningstar Farms chicken nuggets, now that I come home to a partner who cares about her lifespan and making food that's actually supposed to go in your body. I don't ever want to go on a date again with someone obsessed with reading me sections from her dissertation on queer performance theory and Weimar Republic clown art. I want to go home to my partner who ... doesn't do that.

[Trigger warning for extreme cheesiness] I'm in a happy, loving relationship, and I'm not interested in turning back the clock.

Here's what I do miss about dating apps:

1. It was a place to feel superior

I wasn't the hottest ticket on OkCupid by a long shot. What I was, however, was a snob. I felt such a gross tug of superiority when I saw people list Fight Club as their favorite book or listed traveling as one of their favorite hobbies in their Tinder bio. Never mind that I actually liked both of those things — I would never dare to be that unoriginal and write them down in my profile.

I'm not proud of this particular part of my history, but I'm not going to deny that this feeling once existed.

2. There was something to swipe on when I was bored waiting for the train

We all need activities to satisfy our minuscule attention spans. Reading is great. Swiping? Even better. I once loved the feeling of euphoria I got from making a match, even if I didn't like the person on the other end.

Nowadays, I'm forced to go on Twitter to keep my brain engaged. Compared to Tinder and OkCupid, it's a devastatingly depressing platform. I'd much rather be turned down by a bunch of self-professed Slytherins on Tinder than read about Sen. Lindsey Graham's latest emotional outburst.

3. I had a home for my hottest selfies

Every once in a while, I'll get a haircut that I think looks good, and I'll want to post it somewhere. My girlfriend, who is a better person than me, is automatically supportive. I feel awkward about posting a sexy selfie on Instagram, where old coworkers follow me. Does my old boss who I worked with in foster care really want to see me making duck lips? She does not.

To get my full high, I need the affirmation of strangers. If I was on Tinder, I'd have the space to indulge my crudest, most narcissistic impulses.

4. It was a place to get style inspo

Without the internet, I'd probably dress entirely out of the L.L. Bean catalogue. Nothing makes me happier than a well-crafted New England loafer.

As a queer person, Tinder is where I used to go for sartorial inspiration. There aren't that many style blogs out there for gender non-conforming folks, so the best way to search out queer style is by scrolling through queer people on dating apps.

Tinder is the reason I have a floral bomber jacket today. For that, I am grateful.

5. It forced me to write funny jokes

Some of my best comedic material is in my 2009 OkCupid profile. Before I was able to write for the internet, I wrote for an audience of potential girlfriends on OkCupid. Folks, I killed it — at least with my *sassy* copy.

Nowadays, most of my writing on social media is limited to calling people fascists or using the vomit emoji to describe the subway system.

OkCupid and Tinder held me to a higher editorial standard than Twitter.

6. I got a lot of great recommendations

My music taste is mostly limited to music you'll find on Now That's What I Call Music. Thanks to OkCupid, I was able to browse the music interests of people who were far cooler than me. Love my Apple Music playlists? You can thank the OkCupid community of 2005.

The same goes for film and television. Before OkCupid, I was watching the same episodes of The L Word over and over again. Now I have an expanded range of crap I watch on the reg.

7. Tinder and OkCupid brought me community

I'm ashamed to admit this, but online dating gave me most of my current network of friends. It can be hard to find friends in the queer community, which, statistically, is much smaller than the straight population. Often on Tinder or OkCupid, I'd find people just looking for friends, and I'd go out and befriend them (assuming we were compatible/they weren't too serious about astrology).

People I once dated became close friends. Heck, people I met for half a beer became best friends.

For all of the despair dating apps gave me, they still gave me this.

Listen — assuming my girlfriend reads this post and doesn't dump me, I'll never go back. But I can still manage to be grateful.