#are his motivations understandable? yes! it also comes from a place of compassion but when its been so twisted to a point where he-

[frostbitesjc]

just saw someone on twitter say that geto wasn't a villain but a hero. media literacy is so dead

[wen-kexing-apologist]

Ray and Rehab

I am watching carefully for a Love Heals All plot around Sand, Ray, and Ray's alcohol dependency. But I will say, as a harm reductionist, rehab has a much lower success rate for people who unwillingly enter treatment. In order for Ray to have really any hope of maintaining a period of sobriety, he needs to be the one who makes the decision to actually take treatment seriously.

So it is really, vitally important to me, to initially be able to see Ray be emotionally impacted by the questions his therapist was asking him, deflecting, and then seeing it actually sink in a bit the next morning. It is absolutely necessary as a scene to see Ray be the one, with no one around him, with no external pressure standing in the room watching, of his own free will and volition to stop, put his glass down, and start throwing away his alcohol.

And because there are cycles of addiction, it is also very important, in my mind, to see that Ray immediately turns back to alcohol to cope with strong emotions. The second that he feels betrayed by Sand, that he turns back to alcohol.

I think there is a tenuous line to balance here, because I do think that the continuous neglect Ray experienced from his mother, the guilt he almost certainly feels around her death because he ruined her life by just existing, and the fact that his friends are compassion fatigued out with him, are decent foundations from which Ray builds a complete disregard for his life.

Which is part of what I personally think contributes to his alcoholism. So in my mind, in order for treatment to be successful, Ray needs to understand that his life has value. And I do think that it is totally fair for that realization to come through Ray having consistent support from someone.

What I do find critical in the depiction of Ray's final arc here, is that Sand is trying to get him to go to rehab, but he isn't stopping Ray from drinking. For me, this is critical for two reasons:

Again, as a harm reductionist, it is far more important to me that people with a substance dependencies are engaging in substance use as safely as possible, rather than them stopping use. Sand being with Ray where he can watch him, (potentially try to moderate), and drive Ray home is harm reduction.

Runs counter (to me), to a Love Heals All plotline, expressly because Sand takes Ray to places he can drink, (and it looks like they have beer bottles in the bathtub next week). Sand wants Ray to stop drinking but beyond giving him the resources to seek treatment, (and yes, taking Ray up on the ultimatum), he hasn't done anything else to stop Ray from drinking.

(thirdly alcohol withdrawal is super fucking dangerous, so I'm lowkey glad that Sand isn't trying to stop Ray from drinking when he's not around medical professionals. But I'm not counting that cause I doubt Sand would know this).

Like I said, there is a tenuous line to balance between Sand being Ray's savior from alcoholism, and Sand just helping Ray find enough self-motivation to attempt sobriety. And so far, I do think they have set up a couple good indicators towards the former.

[horizon-verizon]

https://www.tumblr.com/very-straight-blog/750648583572881408/it-really-tires-me-how-some-fans-try-to-make-aegon?source=share

What is your opinion about this? Personally, I don't understand why people are so diligently looking for something in Aegon that isn't there.

I wrote about Aegon HERE.

Of course he cares, that's literally the essence of his personality. He cares. He and Aemond both feel too much emotion, but if Aemond sublimates into self–improvement, trying to be strong, cold and detached, then Aegon is literally an open wound. I want to talk about this, also using Tom's interviews (yes, I think the actor's opinion is valid in this matter) and the few scenes that we have in the first season

Having emotion/passion =/= sympathy, caring about others, or altruism. sympathy, altruism, etc. can cause or fuel passion, passion can be the motivation to maintain sympathy/compassion/altruism. Dany is a perfect example caring in hand with passion. But this person conflated "caring" with "being emotional and insecure".

Aegon, bk or show, is emotional bc he doesn't want to expend much energy into doing the ambitious things his family wants him to do, except if it is him showing militaristic prowess to prove masculinity and dominance.

Yes, show!Viserys largely didn't give him the "attention" (more here later) that he gave Rhaenyra, but this neither shows that Aegon truly "cares" since he constantly rapes, has his own bastard kids fight each other when he could have easily set up much better living conditions or have them grow up well-off--as most European noblemen did in real life, even Henry VIII. Viserys not giving him attention doesn't excuse, erase, or undermine how Aegon freely chose to abuse others. Dyana didn't ask to be raped, no one does. Should we ignore her pain for Aegon's "microexpressions"? Daemon's mother passing doesn't excuse his treatment of Rhea Royce (whether he kills her or not, show or book...in the book he still is nasty towards her), while also not having ever raped or SAed women (or really, that being a apart of his character GRRM chose to highlight). Both are princes. And many other men choose not to sexually abuse women despite actual abuse at home -- Samwell Tarly. Who is also a pretty emotional but also actually caring individual. He is not a prince. Aegon doesn't need to be named heir nor will it have a positive effect on the realm if he was made king, like how Rhaenyra needed to be Queen bc it's setting a better precedent for female rulership not just for the throne, but for women/girls to be more included in noble lines of succession and/or to lessen the probability of attempts to unseat female heirs who ascend to their places (Jeyne Arryn). That how Rhaenyra, who had been slandered to be undeserving bc of her gender--something Aegon will never receive and is actual discrimination--also benefits to affirm her worth. Finally, Aegon had to start a war and kill thousands to get what he wanted; Rhaenyra would have peacefully housed him after her ascension. so there's that.

HotD is really uwuing this man, bc canonically he just sees the throne as his male-given right; it was never about "confidence in capabilities" or "who'd make the best ruler" for Aegon. Or the greens. It just never was. Even in the show, if you think for 2 seconds, the only logical reason why he would care so much abt Viserys's treatment of him vs Rhaenyra is abt the throne. Viserys didn't "like" him? Oh, well, maybe that is bc the writers decided not to include the fact that bkViserys spent a lot of time with Helaena and that his probable distance b/t his sons is precisely bc they feel that Rhaenyra, his chosen heir, should not be queen? And that is coming from Otto/Alicent coaching them that way, thus creating that divide?

Viserys actually doesn't treat Rhaenrya all that well despite her being his heir: forcing to marry Laenor, [show] punishing her or castigating her for feelings she rightly has towards marriage after he treated Aemma the way he did, reneging on his deal about Otto with he, etc.

bk!Aegon is threatening Rhaenyra before she gave her first terms, impatient to imprison Rhaenyra after the coronation before those terms, calls her a whore after hearing the terms, etc. He may feel bitter and sad about Viserys not giving what he thought was his "birthright", but I think the showrunners knew that this would not endear him to audiences or make them care abt his PoV, bc this is such a privileged sense of entitlement that is actually dangerous that goes beyond any slander against Rhaenyra's pride to be a female Targaryen heir. Viserys, as king, chose Rhaenya and that is well within his right as king, by these feudal monarchist customs. Female heirs have been chosen in Westeros. even with those girls and women having been chosen only bc there was no viable male candidate, or the ones there were too young, etc., they were still chosen and active in wars in different ways. Plus, if we actually care about victims, which a lot of those women were, you'd also see that having a female heir even with a male candidate, is a better step in the right direction of possibly minimizing that rather than to keep the male-preference primogeniture where the younger male is heir keeps going. Rhaenyra never victimized anyone at that point; Aegon had already done so to serving girls and that 12 year old. In the show, Aegon abuses Helaena by her own words about his sexing her only when he is drunk, but this is throwaway and we are not given a fuller picture (w/o actually showing us the sex, we can still witness their dynamic but as it is they have never been in the same room and we never saw them interact or try to, which HotD clearly takes advantage of bc a lot of people are not cognizant of this or care).

He "cares" about himself and pathetically whines about how he wasn't given or thought to be given what he thinks he deserves based on gender privilege. Boohoo. No one said he was emotionless in the first place! Should I feel bad for a man who doesn't get the expected privileges for being a man?

[honest-moth-of-silver-grove]

Hi hi! Can I get a matchup please? Thanks in advance dear, you are a blessing.

Anyways I have a pref for a male, my best traits are my kindness and compassion, my worst are I can be a little closed off, rather sarcastic and a huge people pleaser. My hobbies are drawing, singing and hiking. I like art, have a morbid sense of humor and can be a bit of a klutz.

Again thank you love!

A/N: Hmmm, okay, I got it! For you @elonianmisfit , I’m thinking your best BG3 matchup would be… Wyll!

🗡 Wyll would be a perfect fit for you! He’s selfless and values compassion in his companions. It’s a trait that’s shaped most of his life after all. His desire to do the right thing, to save the people of Baldur’s Gate is what got him into his contract with Mizora in the first place. 

Of course, this act of self-sacrifice has left him pretty closed off to everyone. But as you said, you can be rather closed off yourself, so you understand his hesitation to share isn’t because he doesn't like you, but because he can be overwhelmed by such affection for him. And he understands that when you back away, it’s not a sign that you aren’t interested in your relationship. You understand each other’s motivations around the subject, so neither of your feelings gets hurt. 

Wyll doesn’t mind the sarcasm. He quite enjoys it, in fact. At one point during the game, as the companions are traveling, he asks Astarion how the “rat diet is going”? It’s a pretty dark sarcastic joke to hear coming from Wyll’s mouth, but then again, he doesn’t know the context of Astarion’s backstory and was merely trying to jest about the former Blade of Frontiers currently befriending a vampire spawn. Of course, if either one of your sarcastic comments or morbid jokes crosses the line, you’ll respectfully let the other know. But for the most part, your companions seem to enjoy your occasional barbs and macabre jests. Gods know it’s hard being sweet and kind 24/7, especially when you spend your time adventuring and fighting monsters. 

And speaking of people-pleasing, oh boy. Wyll has a similar problem. Yes, he made the deal with Mizora for the betterment of Baldur’s Gate, but he also did it with pleasing his father in mind. He cares deeply about the way people view him, which is another reason why he is so hurt by Mizora giving him horns. He just wants to do right by the good people of Baldur’s Gate, by his father, and of course by you. It helps him greatly, knowing that you’ll always care for him, no matter what he looks like, even if he cannot save everyone. He tries his best. He’s an honorable man, and that’s what matters most to you. 

Wyll adores the art you create. He keeps every piece, every drawing, every little doodle tucked away safely- that’s how much it means to him. His tent at camp is starting to overflow with all the beautiful things you create. He loves how creative you are, and how you can create beauty from nothing. In his life, it’s a wonderful reminder that good things are around, they’re just waiting for us to stop and appreciate them. And please, please sing for him! He loves hearing your voice- even if you’re shy about it, that’s okay! He’ll take the two of you to a secluded spot where you can sing for him, and he can come up with a dance based on the beautiful rhythm of your song. He might even ask you to dance with him. And don’t worry about being a klutz. If you can’t dance, he’ll simply have you stand on top of his feet as he slowly steps and sways around your campfire. 

He’s so happy to have you in his life. You’re wonderful, creative, and so beautiful. You’re the light of his life. He will do everything within his power to sever his contract with Mizora so that he can live out his perfect future with you. You are his dream. He can’t wait for his fairytale happily ever after with you. 

⋯ ⋯ ⋯

I hope you like it!

⋯ ⋯ ⋯ As Always, Please Like & Reblog!

[aressida]

Old entry: "The Human’s Hellspace. What we need is Redemption." - Aressida. 13.9.19.

We are in a place on Earth here, how we all have come across which we were all being pushed with our choices that come from our heart’s desires, and we have been tested with our human spirit, right?

What we also need to remind ourselves that -> “You do not have a soul. You are a Soul. You have a body.”

A soul can be strong or unsteady. It can be lost or saved. We all know that a human soul needs atonement, and that is the part of us that is purified and protected by the truth and the work of the Holy Spirit.

“Seeing ye have purified your souls in obeying the truth through the Spirit unto unfeigned love of the brethren, see that ye love one another with a pure heart fervently:” – 1 Peter 1:22. (KJV)

I think with my understanding the human spirit is the spectral form/ethereal part of man. The human spirit includes our intellect, emotions, fears, passions, and creativity. As humanity was created as a rational, volitional agent. In other words, human beings can reason and choose. -> Free Will.

In midst of such Chaos, to open yourself to a world in desperate need of the love and the light that you know, and you knew, could be manifested. This is a reflection of God’s intellect and freedom.

However, free will does not mean that you can do anything you pleases. Your choices are limited to what is in keeping with your nature. This limitation does not soothe our accountability.

The Bible is clear that we not only have the ability to choose, we also have the responsibility to choose wisely. Salvation is God’s work. At the same time, our motives, desires, and actions are voluntary, and we are rightly held responsible for them.

We have a will. We can make decisions.

And biblical speaking, we also have the responsibility to respond to what God has revealed to us, including His call. That makes predestination wins decisively.

“But there is a spirit in man: and the inspiration of the Almighty giveth them understanding.“ – Job 32:8. (KJV)

The Bible says that the human spirit is the very BREATH of Almighty God and was breathed into man at the beginning of God’s creation:

“And the Lord God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and man became a living soul.“ – Genesis 2:7. (KJV)

Humanity was created in righteousness and perfect innocence, a reflection of God’s holiness. Our conscience or moral compass is a vestige of that original state.

Therefore, the human is able to think, feel, love, design, create, and enjoy music, humor, and art. And it is because of the human spirit that we have a “free will”, that no other creature on Earth has.

Today, we still bear the image of God, but we also bear the scars of sin -> Mentally, morally, socially, and physically. We show the effects of sin. When I think like a sinner myself, like everyone else on Earth, the fellowship with God was broken, that was when our spirituality died.

“And you hath he quickened, who were dead in trespasses and sins; Wherein in time past ye walked according to the course of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that now worketh in the children of disobedience: Among whom also we all had our conversation in times past in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind; and were by nature the children of wrath, even as others. But God, who is rich in mercy, for his great love wherewith he loved us, Even when we were dead in sins, hath quickened us together with Christ, (by grace ye are saved;)” – Ephesians 2:1-5. (KJV)

“And you, being dead in your sins and the uncircumcision of your flesh, hath he quickened together with him, having forgiven you all trespasses;“ – Colossians 2:13. (KJV)

“For which cause we faint not; but though our outward man perishes, yet the inward man is renewed day by day.“ – 2 Corinthians 4:16.

“The Spirit itself beareth witness with our spirit, that we are the children of God:“ – Romans 8:16. (KJV)

“He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.“ – Psalm 23:2.

To me, it has been said that there are only two things that actually last -> The Word of God and the Souls of Men. That redemption is only available by God’s grace through faith in Jesus Christ as our Savior from the sin that separates us from God.

“Heaven and earth shall pass away: but my words shall not pass away.“ – Mark 13:31.

“For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast.“ – Ephesians 2:8-9. (KJV)

“Therefore if any man is in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things become new.“ – 2 Corinthians 5:17. (KJV)

[They] controls us by using the message of Love from Jesus.

With my involvement in the Q Movement. Q has posted this and I want to share a few:

What people should know that with everything that I am and that be, I have been staying true to my heart. I find it is much easier to live with the choices I have made from that peaceful aspect of my being I call the heart than the choices I have made from anger, fear or from wanting to please others or make them happy.

This is why I always going to be myself. An original is always worth more than a copy.

“Life is not about who you know, but rather about who knows you and what you stand for. Show the world with presence, actions and the way you lead your life, who you are.” ― Akilnathan Logeswaran.

I understand it can be scary at times. What you need to try is to and have yourself thrown into different situations, and you will know then that your heart will respond to them.

It can be hard sometimes when to say which is better, since both origin from your heart, but you can always make a choice.

[alister312]

do i even have to ask..... the character ask with gregory. Yes. All of them (if you can think of something)

THERE ARE. 50 OF THESE THINGS.

i honest to god tried but its midnight and im tired so i didn't get to all of them. maybe i will another time. here's the ask game for anyone maybe wanting to see certain ones i skipped answered.

1. Canon I outright reject

There is so little canon to him to even embrace but uhhhhhh. Him being so shit at drawing a directional compass. He's a smart boy I don't think he would fuck up a compass as badly as he did on his map in the movie.

2. A canon or headcanon hill I will die on

He has led a rich boy life. While I do love the idea of his parents as professors, it makes so much more sense if they're wealthy social elites and he's got all these immense expectations placed on his shoulders from a young age. He develops crippling imposter syndrome and anxiety due to this but is extremely good at masking it and accomplishing things so no one knows (except ofc Christophe).

3. Obscure headcanon

Big big fan of the "Gregory can play an instrument" headcanon, though I don't always see it implemented. Like, yes he sings but what if he also played the piano or violin? I think he does.

4. Favorite line

I kinda really like his little "O-ho..." after meeting Stan for the first time. It's just a solid line read and further solidifies the headcanon of him as a wealthy upperclass kid. He's clearly uninterested but he's learned he can't say that... he's gotta cage it. Maintain a good public image.

5. Best personality trait

The fact that he's so quick to stand up for others and put himself on the line for them!! Whether it's acting as Wendy's voice against Garrison or volunteering to go to the dangerous USO show, Gregory is willing to put in the work! Doesn't fall into that rich kid cliche.

6. Worst personality trait

Of course it's the flipside of his best trait: the fact that he thinks he has to do everything for everyone. He's gonna exhaust himself as well as come across as extremely controlling!!

7. Age/height/weight headcanon

Age depends on what sort of AU I have going on... though by default I tend to image him in his late twenties, early thirties? Usually makes the most sense.

Gregory maxes out at about 5'10" to me (with Christophe being more 6'1", 2"). Gregory carries himself very well though and may even wear shoes with a bit of height, so people usually believe he's a bit taller than he actually is. He's never slouched once in his life and he won't start now.

Weight I'm honestly not sure? He's fit and slim (swimmer's body type), well balanced. I know that much.

8. Unpopular opinion about them

He would never grow his hair out long. I know the Les Mis stans love to give him a ponytail and the Hell/park fans love to give him a ponytail but I absolutely don't understand. I get him maybe caring deeply about his hair, but that's why he'd keep it short. Much easier to style and manage.

9. Scene that first made me love (or hate) the character

I don't remember but it was probably the line about everyone being rogues. It's just such an iconic line.

10. Best moment on screen (or in the book)

La Resistance. Howard McGillin killed it as his singing voice and the sequence in general is just an absolute highlight of the whole film.

11. Faceclaim for the role

I don't actually have one?? Like I have a very clear image in my mind whenever I draw him but I've never sat down and found real life people who look like that. I'd know if I saw though.

12. Crack headcanon

Gregory really likes fish. Not like in the sea exactly, but big tank aquariums. He knows all about proper tank and fish care and has a beautiful one in his office. His pride and joy.

13. Dumbest thing they’ve ever done

Trusting his bestest friend Christophe to Stan and crew was a pretty dumb move. Especially when he knew how unequipped they were to handle everything.

14. Most heroic moment

Again. La Resistance. He's so good at rallying and motivating people <3

15. Worst thing they’ve ever done

Trusting his bes-- nah. Joking. Worst thing he did was what he DIDN'T do, which is run off to go find Christophe after not seeing him with Stan.

16. Deepest darkest secret they won’t even admit to themselves

Not a secret so much as a fear that all his activism and fighting will be for nothing ultimately and he'll leave the world having not changed it for the better at all. He knows on some level he will, what with the friends he's made, but he wants to do something on a grander scale.

17. Quotes, songs, poems, etc. that I associate with them

A bunch definitely but I am trying so hard to get all these questions done so I cannot dwell.

18. What they’d go to see a therapist about

what WOULDN'T he see a therapist about it. um. parental expectation issues. aforementioned terrible imposter syndrome and anxiety. probably war trauma and mercenary trauma.

19. Vices/bad habits

He can go for days without sleep and very little food. He's just too focused on being busy to really bother. Christophe has had to force him to take a nap many times before.

20. Scars

Ella had such a gorgeous way of putting it in the one gregstophe fic she wrote, with Gregory having some thin snicks of scars from sword blades? Something like that. It's good. He doesn't have scars he can't hide. He's got a public image to maintain.

21. Drink of choice (not just alcoholic)

I do see him as a tea drinker. No sugar, maybe a splash of milk depending on the kind of tea. For alcohol, he's a gin drinker. I'm only projecting a little bit there.

22. Best physical feature

His smile! He was born with perfect teeth... never needed braces and brushes and flosses after every meal. Uses whitening stripes on a regular basis. Flashes it proudly whenever he meets someone new.

23. If they were a scented candle, what would they smell like?

Pamplemousse. It's got a bit of citrus kick but it's on the sweeter side. Also it just sounds the way I imagine he comes off as.

24. Most annoying habit

Spins pens/pencils between his fingers while he's trying to concentrate. The frustrating thing is he always does this perfectly, never drops it. It's just a thing he does and doesn't get it when others ask him how he does it.

25. 3 things they’d want to take with them if they were dropped off in the middle of nowhere

Water bottle with filtration in it, multitool, and his favorite book. He's practical.

26. What they would do if stuck in an elevator with Stan (looking at his keychain rn)

Wait patiently while Stan exhausted himself panicking about being stuck and doing stuff like trying the doors in vain. Once he was done, Gregory would call the fire marshal to come get them out. Stan would hate him for how nonplussed he was the whole time.

[nemesis-is-my-middle-name]

The way you write Ingo and Akari's interactions with each other never fails to warm my heart. And after seeing how he is with Rei in oop, I'm so excited to see how Emmet interacts with Akari. And let's not forget how your Cyllene is with Rei, and how she considers him Her Boy. I just love the intergenerational relationships you have going on. Kids deserve to have good adults in their lives, especially ones like Akari and Rei who have had it so rough.

There are... a lot of things I don't like about many interpretations of Emmet in fandom, but one I especially dislike is when he's overly rude or dismissive towards the kids. You avoid that trap neatly, though that's no surprise because the way you write him is one of my all time favorites. That's maybe a bit beside the point though.

In any case, I loved the little prompt snippets you wrote yesterday about Ingo with both Akari and Rei. The one you wrote with Rei was both cool and heartbreaking with how his dedication and care was the only thing keeping him going, all so Rei might have the chance to live. And the one Akari was so sweet and heartwarming, with how gentle his love for her was. She doesn't know it, but Ingo's home isn't a place, like her it's the people he cares about, and she's included in that too now. In this au where he's so close to her, it wouldn't be complete without her there.

WAAAAH THIS IS SUCH A NICE ASK?? THANK YOU?? thank you so much... i'm gonna cry this is so sweet. thank youuuu... i uh rambled a lot about characters and relationships so i'm going to put the rest of that under. a cut i think. contd:

anyway. YEAH re: kids deserving Good Adults. tbh whenever i see a kid on their own in fiction it activates some kind of primal pack bonding instinct in me to protect them, so this is like, vicarious parenting. and i just REALLY like characters who are Good With Kids, it's like one of my fav character traits that makes me instantly love them. and i love all the different ways that can come through, like, like you said, cyllene who isn't so great at saying how she feels but has SO adopted these two. so. yes. this is primarily self indulgent. it all comes back to my love of picking apart character motivations lol

also WHO is making emmet not nice to kids. i'll fight them. i'll duel them in the street right now. why is everyone else so WRONG about my BLORBO. i think- not to Also get sidetracked, lol, but- i think emmet is someone who's extremely straightforward with everything he says, and doesn't back down, but the critical thing is that all that blunt directness and stubbornness is backed by an intense motivation to help and protect others. so that's what i'm trying to channel when he's with rei or anyone else—specifically because he doesn't try to hedge his words or anything, it is so obvious at all times that he Cares and wants to Help. which can be like, intensely validating/reassuring/trust-building. like short and direct and not good at subtlety don't have to be negative asshole-building character traits!! ...but uhh anyway what were we talking about again

ingo ficlets right. YEAHH THANK YOU... i think in comparison to emmet ingo is like. actually good with people, in the sense that he can read peoples' emotions from their words and actions much better, and is very understanding and patient. and obviously he's also driven by that same compassion. trying really hard not to just make this about comparing how i characterize them both ANYWAY. and i am giving him the Parenting Instincts, lol, which, i think he has an immediate reaction of "oh i need to help you" when he sees anyone who's lost/hurt/confused, but it's stronger with kids bc they obviously tend to have less ability to support themselves. so with akari in the adoption fic i keep gesturing towards and Not Finishing, and rei in the ficlet who got separated from his usual crew, he just adopts them very quickly lol. (there's also something to be said there for how i usually write amnesiac-ingo as having a kind of busted self-perception, as we've covered, so he's outsourcing his motivation and desire to continue living to others, which is sort of a Not Great aspect of this, but uhh that's getting sidetracked again)

anyway YEAH!! his home is his loved ones!! yessss exactly!! you have it spot on, i think in that snippet after akari brings it up he does have that thought of, all he has to judge his "home" by is a vague vibe that it was good and he misses it. what if it isn't as perfect as his non-memory thinks it is? what if it can't/won't make space for akari? in which case i think that despite how much he misses it, he would be fully prepared to walk out of it for her. because like you said, his home isn't a place, it's the people!! so if akari can't belong there, then it isn't his home, either. (not that it would ever come to that in reality)

so. yes. as you can probably tell i could go on about this subject forever. just adhd tangent after tangent about kids, and the ways they get treated, and what it says about characters, and character motivations in general, and bitching about how my blorbo gets misinterpreted. but. my point is. this was a very nice ask i am going to print it out and tape it in my diary thank you

[stargazeraldroth]

Balanceswap seems very interesting!!! Do you have the personalities of the primary four? I know you’ve given the basics, but how do they act and think and stuff? What kind of people are they, deep down?

Yes and no. I don't have EVERY detail of their personalities down, but I do have a general idea of how they act. I'm sorry if this is all long and hard to read, but I hope this helps! Also, Nightmare and Dream's parts are longer because they're actually the ones that initially prompted this AU, rather than it being Ink and Error.

Error is still hotheaded and easy to irritate, but he's also more mature and has more self-control than his canon self. He's more considerate of others and shows more compassion and concern, as evident in his dynamic with Ink. He takes his job seriously, if with a grain of salt, but he's not entirely subservient to the Creators' wishes. Unlike how I usually make Ink act, Error has no qualms about talking back to the Creators and even getting snappy with or disregarding them. He knows how fleeting life can be, so he's typically much more reclusive and introverted, only really establishing bonds with Outcodes like him or fellow immortals. He's observant and relatively quiet, but sometimes he speaks without thinking. He can be blunt and brutally honest, as even though he's more compassionate, he's not the greatest at understanding other people and how they feel. He's also a bit of a tsundere and gets flustered very easily. He's not the best at expressing himself with words, so he hopes to convey most of his feelings through actions instead. Error doesn't really hang out around the Omega Timeline despite being welcomed there, but I do like to think he occasionally makes scarves and things to donate to the people there. Speaking of the Omega Timeline, he doesn't really consider himself a good figure in the Multiverse either, he considers himself a neutral entity. He doesn't have a group of his own like how normal Ink's in the Star Sanses. He doesn't regularly visit the Omega Timeline and he doesn't exactly have the friendliest reputation, but he's respected. Honestly, the only one he probably likes is CORE. As for Nightmare, he mostly just tolerates him. They work with each other when it's convenient, but Error doesn't consider him an ally

Ink used to be very similar to his usual self, very curious and cheerful. Of course, everything changed once he found about his origins. Ink's initial rage over the reveal and his fallout with Error was impulsive and triggered by his emotions, and he felt so bad about it once he calmed down. He believed he ruined the one good thing in his life and, in a way, the one good thing to come from his existence as a whole. He... had to be an abandoned project for a reason, right? He has a lot of self-esteem/self-image issues following all of this. For a while, Ink just... wandered around aimlessly until he came across an AU filled with suffering. He interpreted this as another cruelty of the Creators rather than a necessity to counter positive AUs such as Haventale, which is what motivated him to become the self-proclaimed Destroyer. Ink has very mixed feelings towards the AUs in general; he's happy that they're so loved by the Creators and treated so preciously, but at the same time, but he's also jealous because he still believes he's worth less than them. He believes that the AUs were intentional, cherished projects and he was a broken toy the Creators bought at a yard sale. Literally- literally everything would've been fine if the Creators just... didn't say anything. Literally everything would've been okay. I don't remember why Ink was interested in finding Dream, but he basically treats him like his own child. He tries to help Dream learn how use his powers, but it's difficult when you're constantly hopping from one place to the next. In some ways, Ink also thinks he's... beyond redemption, in a way. He feels like it's impossible for him to come back from this, that as soon as he tries to change, people are gonna take advantage of it to jump him

Nightmare is, to put it simply, an egotistical yandere made of molten gold. He was more level-headed as a child, but also even more mature and emotionally drained than his canon self. He was protective of Dream, but wasn't controlling or crazy possessive; he was happy that Dream had friends, no matter how weird they might've been, and that he had other people to talk to in a more positive way. He was clever, but also deceptive- he wanted Dream and the Villagers to think he was oblivious to their mistreatment of him. The Villagers for obvious reasons, but he already knew Dream wouldn't open up about the abuse and lie to his face when asked about injuries. He was mostly worried that if he let Dream know he was aware of it all, Dream would start trying to defend the Villagers. Maybe a little irrational, but they're like 6 years old, of course Nightmare's logic isn't flawless. Anyway, when he triggers the Apple Incident, everything changes. His positive feelings are enhanced, such as his fondness for Dream. As for being hailed as a god by the Villagers, what he once saw as a nuisance and flattery turned into something he desired. He... wanted to be worshipped as the god he is. He was already a bit mentally unstable before hand and told Dream to pick his "favorite" apple from the Tree, but it just increases tenfold now. His solution to problems, at the time, was to just get rid of the source. So when Dream pointed out they're supposed to guard the Tree, not eat its fruits, Nightmare just... killed the Tree. Trauma! Fast forward some time, and Nightmare's grown... manipulative and coercive. He basically weaseled his way into the Council- which is run by CORE- and snagged a high position by sweet-talking his way there. He knows he isn't the sole source of authority, but... well, he does have a god complex. Maybe even a Messiah Complex. He's also a perfectionist and believes he's flawless, that there's nothing wrong with him. He can't properly handle criticism because he's so used to being praised for doing as little as blinking. He genuinely cares about Dream, but he's toxic in the sense that he's controlling and possessive. As I mentioned before, when Dream ran away to see Nightmare again, though he was genuinely concerned for his well-being due to how weak he became, he was... pleased, in a way, and delighted to have Dream be so dependent on him. Part of Ink's reputation as a villain comes from Nightmare's fury over him taking Dream away not once, but twice, and always, ALWAYS running off with him before Nightmare can reach them. Nightmare would never intentionally, knowingly hurt Dream, so he might not even realize that what he wants is harmful to him. Now, were Nightmare to ever accidentally strike Dream... well, I'll leave that to your imaginations.

Dream. Oh sweet, confused little Dream. He's a whole storm of emotions. To put it plainly, Dream's confused. About everything. He doesn't know what he should be doing, who he should believe, what the right thing to do is... and he's scared because of that. He's scared of the world, he's scared of Nightmare (trauma), and he's scared of himself. Of his powers. He doesn't know how to control them. Though he's still sweet and friendly, he's more withdrawn and reserved due to the abuse he's gone through. As a child, the Villagers ingrained it in his head that his "role" was to be the recipient of their anger due to being the Guardian of Negativity. In a lot of ways, Dream was envious of Nightmare. Nightmare was loved by the Villagers, but he also knew they made him work a lot, too... if only there was a way he could help. But he can't leave the Tree, someone has to guard it! Dream so wholeheartedly trusted Nightmare that he didn't even question it when he told him to pick his favorite black apple (mistake 1). So when the Apple Incident happened, his whole worldview just... shattered. When he ran away from Ink, it's because he wanted to believe Nightmare changed. It's been centuries! And he did change! Just... not in the way Dream had been hoping. Sometimes he wishes he could just... go to sleep and stay in the perfect world in his head. Dream's a little neutral on his own, too. He's like a neutral party that's being pulled every which way, but he sees the pros and cons of all sides. I'm reaching a limit so I can provide more context on this, just ask if you're curious

[glowyjellyfish]

OUAT Rewatch Report Part 7: Into the Deep through The Cricket Game, and Bad Blood through Dirty Little Secrets

I stalled so much on making a post that I ended up mushing two sessions into one post! Whoops.

1. I adore how Jafar’s father issues are paralleled with Alice. And it’s really intriguing to me that all the major villains in both shows so far are motivated by love—more accurately, by the loss of love. The more redeemable villains are the ones who open themselves to finding love again and changing themselves to earn it. Jafar’s motivated by having his love for his father spurned and betrayed, and it fascinates me how vicious they both get towards one another. The Sultan in the present day seems like a reasonably good guy, and we’re given little to no concrete motive for his murder of Jafar—it’s not hard at all to read between the lines and see that he was protecting his son from a bold, smart, ambitious bastard that even if he meant no harm could easily be used by someone who did, and it’s still so interesting that he has zero regrets in the present, no apparent concern that he made Jafar who he is. It’s understandable, seeing who Jafar is now, and it’s also not hard to assume Jafar might have been less cruel if his father was nicer to him, but he still would have been bold, ambitious, smart, and burning to prove himself. It does make me wonder what Jafar’s mother was like.

2. I love team Rumple-Regina-Charming-Henry doing magic alchemy and working together. Rumple’s always so nice to Henry, understandably, and it’s wonderful to see Regina and Henry together and see her working at showing love for him rather than clutching him posessively.

3. what’s with all the magic compasses, that’s the third magic compass there has been in this universe.

4. it’s great how Cyrus quickly figures Ana out and places his trust in her; really, the show had to have SOMEBODY on her side in order to keep her around Will and Alice, but it was well done, and I like that Cyrus gets positioned with Ana when we recently had Alice paralleled with Jafar. You’d expect the male hero to be paired with the male villain, while the heroine and villainess pair off, but this show went with what worked for the characters.

5. it’s kind of funny how OUATW has the three genies coming from Agrabah, with no mention of any others even existing, while regular Once also had a completely different genie from Agrabah in his own lamp. Obviously, Amara had her reasons to only seek out these three genies, but… did Jafar ever find other genies that weren’t the three brothers and discard them? I mean, Sydney became a mirror no more than maybe ten years ago (ignoring the curse years), and wasn’t a genie anymore at that point, but Jafar’s been looking for genies for a good chunk of his life (albeit we don’t know how old he is, or how old he was when Amara told him about the genies). It would be odd for the three genies plus Sydney to be the ONLY genies anyway, so I have to assume that Amara’s spell insists upon those specific genies that the show was just too vague about. The other option I can think of, that would answer some things but also cause its own problems, is that there are two different Agrabahs—one that’s a region in Fairy Tale Land, another that’s a world of its own. That would explain how it escaped the curse, but I doubt it works overall.

6. It’s fascinating to get Cora’s Wonderland backstory in between OUATW episodes. Cora seemed to feel she ruled Wonderland, and so did Ana, and yet I know they co-existed for a long time! Probably Wonderland is just a chaotic mess of little kingdoms everywhere, and Cora grabbed one for herself, and Ana happened to luck into a larger one, but it’s funny how both talk like they rule all Wonderland.

7. So, yes, Hook was deliberately being completely sincere when he was adventuring with Emma, including the part about being willing to follow whoever would get him to his goal. I think he was also using his charm and swagger to try to get her to like him enough to trust him, or at least wear down her defenses. And he probably would have preferred going with the heroes because he’s not stupid, Cora is clearly dangerous even to those close to her, while the heroes are honorable enough that all he’d have to do is play nice and he’d be pretty safe. But he also just does not give a single shit about anything but his revenge at this point, and he has absolutely zero qualms about anything he might have to do to get there. Nice and manipulative? Cruel and aggressive? Whatever gets the job done. He’s also pointedly honorable in a way appropriate to Hook (well, a version of Hook that is a bit of a weenie imo), but while I appreciate the show using “good form” a few times, sometimes they don’t seem to understand what it means. No, OUAT, it has nothing to do with sword form, what are you smoking?

8. it’s a bit hard to take seriously how single-mindedly Hook pursues revenge for the death of his true love for centuries, knowing that in like a season he’ll be making googly eyes at Emma for real, but it does at least tie back to my note about redeemable villains being the ones capable of finding love again. And it also does make sense considering that he spent most of that time in Neverland, and it isn’t hard to conclude that not aging in Neverland would also hamper one’s ability to mature, change, and grow even if one is already fully adult. Definitely does not seem like a healthy place to grieve.

9. I complained a lot about the split seasons back in the day, but honestly in this rewatch, this first half of s2 is pretty well done. Fairly tightly written, where even plots that seem like filler either come back later or contribute to the theme or character development. A solid theme, as I described, and it just barely manages to juggle three plot threads (Storybrooke, Fairy Tale Land, and Flashbacks) without staying away from any one plot for too long or dragging too much—although it does come close to dragging. And it’s setting up a lot for the second half of the season, too. Aurora and Mulan are good characters, and on top of that they are useful to the plot, filling needed roles and making them unique and memorable. It didn’t even drop the ensemble cast like s3a does in my memory, and managed to give several minor recurring characters their own arcs. I love to talk about what I would want to change about this show, and right now I’m not sure I would change a thing. Well… I might give Hook a wig or at least long hair. He can lose it in mourning, just give him his dignity! And it’s tempting to say I would tone down his obnoxious hitting on Emma (well mostly Emma), but I feel like I need to rewatch more and figure out his character wholly before making sweeping decisions like that. It’s not that I think this half-season is perfect; it doesn’t have any great wham episodes like Red-Handed or Skin Deep or anything, but to me, it doesn’t have any glaring flaws that any fic writer could do better with, and it doesn’t have anything incredibly stupid like Dreamy. Just standard nitpicky flaws, character flaws, and bad CG in a pretty respectable half-season.

10. Super love Ana getting kidnapped and almost murdered for being a bad queen, and her emotional reaction to that. It’s the sort of thing I wish Regina had to face, but then again Ana never got as bad as Regina, and there’s no evidence one way or the other how Regina did at ruling. OUAT works hard to sell Regina changing, and it’s not that I think she isn’t, it’s that all her change has been “behaving herself” and very little “making amends” or “admitting she wronged people”. The two shows reflected one another, showing Regina trying to change in one, followed by Ana struggling to redeem herself in the other. I love that Ana recognizes and owns up to all her mistakes, and not just the ones that cost her directly. I love that she comes up with a plan to do better and be better for everyone, on the assumption that it’s not even possible to win Will back anyway. And I love that it’s not easy, that she still has to face all the shit she’s done, and all the darkness and shallowness inside her head. Regina’s feelings are always great, and in this rewatch I did notice that her time living in Storybrooke with Henry had already changed her quite a bit, even if she’s quick to revert when threatened, but I wish there was more struggle with her redemption. Regina’s redemption feels very black and white. She’s either behaving herself and deserves to be fully accepted immediately, or she’s totally murderous and rejecting everybody before they can reject her. There is no in between, nobody talks about the possibility of making real amends with the townspeople or anything. Maybe it just speaks to her forceful and dramatic personality.

11. Episodes in this section are what inspired my theories about how genie magic works. Of course, it’s impossible to tell from what is given whether the magic was so cruel because it was inflicting a price for extravagant and impossible wishes, or if it might be because it was filtered through Will’s cynically heartless ass and his perception of things, or possibly both. I mean, logically, the magic definitely understood and followed his intent when he made his wish, because that could have easily been creatively misunderstood and led to Alice’s death. I could posit a theory that the only way to truly end Alice’s suffering included defeating Jafar, which meant there had to be a replacement genie to reach that point… but I’m not sure whether magic is that farsighted or sensible.

12. I really liked Emma being the one willing to reach out to Regina, showing that what Regina did to everyone is less real to Emma than to them; that Emma recognized how much Regina loves Henry and that she was willing to put him above everything else; and that Emma doesn’t see herself as being that much better a person.

13. Season 2 has been reminding me that I really wanted to ship Regina and Archie back in the day. I don’t think I got to the point of actively shipping them; Robin Hood was fine and clearly more her type. I just loved that Archie was nice to her and wanted something to come of that. Of course, during s2 that would be a tad unethical, but still.

14. I haven’t been actively trying to update my Unexpected Disney Songs For OUAT Characters playlist, but it has occurred to me that Surface Pressure is an excellent Emma song, probably much better than any of the songs I had for her before.

15. I think avoiding Alice’s questions about his backstory is the most intriguing Cyrus ever was; I don’t think he’s boring like some other people I could mention, but he was emphatically not the reason I tuned in, adoring literally every other character significantly more. I do love the way his backstory fits perfectly with everything we’ve seen him do, and I found it very interesting that OUATW explored some of the aftermath—what happens after they find each other and get to be together, and it wasn’t afraid to show them having to figure out the reality after putting each other on pedestals for so long.

I struggled a bit with finding a good collection of gifs this time, and decided to just scrape together a set describing Emma. I can probably do better, given time; I think Leela will be a great source for Emma-like incorrect quotes.

[vampyrial]

I don’t think Alucard would turn anyone, not even out of loneliness, to be honest. I firstly don’t think Alucard as someone who is a dhampir can ever completely relate to the vampires because he’s just as much human as he is a vampire. He shows disgust at the evidence of the Belmonts killing vampires, yes, but that to me is just because he has basic empathy and respect for what is the other half of his heritage, not really because he feels kindred to other vampires on a personal level. He has no vampire friends, doesn’t seem to be even acquainted with his father’s court and kills them without hesitation. Hell, he doesn’t even seem to know other vampires. 

As much as Alucard deeply loves and respects his father, I can’t imagine his connection to Dracula, the emotionally constipated vampire, would ever be the same as his level of connection to Lisa who was very open even from the first time we see her on screen. He takes after his mother more both in appearance and moral compass. He feels a lot of guilt for killing Dracula whom he loves, not just for the sheer fact that he’s had to kill someone dear to him, but also because of his mother (I can’t properly phrase it properly but you get it). Lisa loved the humans very deeply and I can’t assume that he wouldn’t have grown up inheriting a bit of her attitude towards them due to upbringing or at least being very slightly more biased towards them than to vampires due to his affection for Lisa.

I know people like to characterize Alucard as being more vampire than human (which I get yk because vampires sexy and it’s more interesting to some people to view him that way) but in all reality, he’s nothing like any of the other vampires we've seen. Their relationships with and to humans do not share many similarities. He does seem to see both Sypha and Trevor as equals. Lenore, even though her relationship with Hector seems to deepen, is not one based in equality and empathy. Striga and Morgana don’t see humans as equals, they don’t engage with them in relationships at all, to them they are a totally different species – like pigs to humans, is the analogy I think they used. Dracula cared for and saved Isaac but even though he calls Isaac a friend, their relationship more resembles a loyal knight and the lord who commands him. And Isaac himself seems to also put Dracula above himself. Carmilla is all violence when it comes to humans. Moreover,  Alucard is not at all phased by the fact that T*ka and S*mi literally come to him - a half vampire, for help with…killing vampires. Alucard is unable to be fully human, to fully relate to other humans but that doesn’t mean he isn’t turned more to that direction.  

I think for as much as Alucard understands his father, he doesn’t necessarily fear becoming him. Trauma after trauma, he’s still self sacrificing and mostly motivated by good intention, even when he slips into behavior that resembles his father’s, he’s still quite quick to show concern for others and be helpful. More than being motivated by his own wounds, he’s motivated by his own view of what is right. When he looks in the mirror at the beginning of season 4 and sees who he currently is, the entire joke is that he’s supposed to be horrified at having “become his father” but he’s more horrified at the fact that he's become Trevor in the worst way possible. More often his loneliness doesn’t amount to selfishness, it amounts to self harm (ex. isolating in the castle instead of figuring out some way to move the materials his father collected elsewhere or securing it in some way so that he doesn’t have to stay in the place where he murdered his father).

Alucard is a very deeply lonely character but he’s also one of the most self sacrificial and emotionally masochistic and self flagellating characters I have ever seen (aside from Isaac). People have already said that the reason Alucard stayed in the sad, demolished castle even after everything was over was more for his own isolation as punishment than it was for practical reasons and I agree. Emotionally, Alucard is much more restrained than his father, he’s also stronger in some respects. On some level, he thinks it’s his responsibility to be. He shouldered the burden of stopping his father and then dealing with the aftermath of that. Then with protecting what his father cultivated…and then helping humans kill a vampire in no small part because it’s what he thinks his mother would want and the right thing to do. This enormous loneliness he carries, it’s also something like a duty to him, a punishment, something he dives head first into. 

Lisa never becoming a vampire was likely more her choice than it ever was Dracula’s. With his hatred for all humans aside from her, I don’t see why he wouldn’t have jumped at the chance if she wanted it. I doubt he simply cherished her humanity so much he came to the conclusion on his own, to him she was quite different from other humans and that was her draw. There's also the fact that Dracula was so attached to her, I can’t see him not being tempted by the idea of not having to spend his eternity alone, being able to share it with his beloved. I hc that it was Lisa’s desire, Lisa loves humanity and is rather passionate about other humans. She had little incentive to want something different. She strikes me as someone who would embrace growing old and even embrace dying at an old age. Lisa never got to do that, she never got to grow old and I think somewhere in him, there would be that inability to turn someone and effectively rob their chance to grow old or to go out like they wanted to, like what was done to Lisa. It’s not that he thinks Dracula not turning Lisa is the reason for what happened, it’s the way she went out. When he talks about the tragedy of his father’s madness, he doesn’t remark upon it by implying it was in any part due to either Dracula’s or Lisa’s decision not to turn her, he instead blames the religious inquisition who killed his mother and in turn proved true Dracula’s greatest misgivings about humanity. It’s not simply that his mother died that impacted Dracula so deeply, it’s the fact that she was killed, taken before her time. If she had lived as long as she was supposed to, there would have been no reason for the entire central conflict. Aside from that, nobody wants to lose a beloved parent at the tender age of 19, (no one wants to lose their beloved parents at all but especially not at an age where you are still realistically in need of a lot more support from them) it’s a similarly devastating but entirely different ordeal as losing them when you’re in your 50s-60s.

I don’t think Alucard would see the people he loves age and die and wish they could be eternal, I think he’d see the people he loves age and wish he could age right along with them. When you’re immersed within a culture, it’s more likely that you’ll want to be more like them than you’ll want them to be more like you, if that makes sense, especially if it is a dominant culture which seems to be the case with humans vs vampires. Alucard only has human friends and now an entire village of humans that will probably remain for generations. He identifies with his mother heavily as I said, already sharing some of her same views/morals and I could see him sharing more of her sentiments towards life too. Rather than “someone wants to live eternity with me”, for him I think what would be most appealing is “someone wants to grow old with me, someone would want to die with me and if I suffer from losing them first, I know there will be an end”. He’s surrounded by humans so they become the norm, he knows no vampires so I can’t see their side of life really appealing to him more than that. Besides, vampirism will not eliminate the possibility of watching someone he loves die, almost all the vampires we know of died/were killed…some of them fairly easily comparably and by humans at that. At most you could say that it reduces the chances by a great amount but even Carmilla was killed despite her viciousness and strength by ONE singular human (Isaac wasn’t the one who finished her off but it’s all but flat out said that if Carmilla hadn’t ended it, he would have). Dracula himself wanted to die after Lisa was killed, Alucard knew that and was the one who called him out on it. Even in his rantings about his hatred for humanity, Dracula never mentions that he never turned her as a regret he harbors or implies that he should have done so, even if it was ultimately what he desired. He’s even annoyed at Carmilla for suggesting otherwise. His desire at that point was to die like she had. 

Alucard is a very guilt ridden character, one who is very morally driven as I’ve said over and over in so many ways. I think he would view turning someone even at their will as being immoral. Besides that, what's next afterwards? What if it has the opposite effect entirely, they regret such a big decision and end up turning away or growing apart from him? What if they live a horrible life and suffer mental anguish from suddenly being an entirely different creature, one of the creatures who stalked and terrorized their kind at that? That pain is lasting and Alucard is far too empathetic to take something like that in stride with no regrets. “Better off dead” is a sentiment that Alucard is all too familiar with. I don’t see him ever being able to let go of his own sense of morals to cope with his loneliness, I don’t see him being able to indulge that selfish desire.

[findingjoynweirdstuff]

Dream SMP Recap (December 6/2020) - End of Week

What started as a sad but calm day ended with a revolution where morality was questioned and blood was shed. The server’s first canon death since the three lives rule was implemented occurred, and all hell broke loose.

Dream’s motivations have started to be laid bare, but whether or not he’s in the wrong or right remains foggy as ever in a world where everyone’s morals are gray.

Also, the prison’s construction continues and some strange red corruptions called “Blood Vines” have sprouted up on the server.

A short summary of the week’s total events is at the end of the post.

---

- HBomb hosts Niki and Wilbur’s L’Cast

- Fundy continues work on the chess board

- Ranboo is leaving a book with messages to communicate with Tommy

- Fundy and Ranboo visit Tommy and help him through the Nether to find blaze rods. It’s a very...interesting...time... Fundy fills Tommy in on the fact that Dream is officially recognizing L’manburg as a country.

- Tommy falls in lava and loses all his stuff

- Then he burns to death

- Then he falls in lava and loses all his stuff again

- He FINALLY gets an ender chest

- Lazar asks him for help since he’d fallen in lava and needed help getting out. As Tommy does so, Lazar questions why Tommy hasn’t turned against L’manburg. Tommy says it’s because Tubbo is there, but Lazar points out that Tubbo was the one who exiled him.

- Ghostbur comes on and says he has a gift.

- Tommy attempts to rescue Lazar from the depths of the lava pit. Techno starts arguing with him.

- Tommy falls in lava and loses all his stuff again. He gives up on helping Lazar, who is understandably annoyed at him.

- Philza joins the call wondering wtf is happening and why Tommy keeps dying, but Tommy just ends stream

- Psyche! After credits scene. Ghostbur asks Tommy to return to Logstedshire so he dies in lava to fast-travel back. Ghostbur gives Tommy a lodestone compass named “Your Tubbo” that points back to L’manburg at all times. Tommy puts the compass in his ender chest right next to the discs, saying he’ll keep it close to his heart.

- Thunder’s frustrated that Tommy got exiled exiled because the Prank War he was setting up between Dream and Tommy can no longer happen and Thunder’s great villain arc has been cancelled - he is no longer a villain now.

- Now, he wants to do the clay prank to George instead to try and get Dream and George to turn on each other as revenge for Dream burning his house.

- Puffy builds Tommy a second Christmas Tree.

--- Note: From this point on I tried to include more specific details than normal since it’s an important and confusing event ---

- Quackity declares war on the Dream SMP from Mexican L’manburg. He gets George, Sapnap and Karl on to help. He’s rigged TNT under Eret’s castle bridge and wants to invoke the same ideas as the Mexican Revolution. He wants to put M.L. on the map by staging an assassination and using George’s dethronement as an excuse to start a political movement.

- Sapnap wants to take on Technoblade but Quackity tells him that they have to take things step by step and that it’s an extremely bad idea to do it now.

- Eret asks Hbomb to be one of his knights. HBomb agrees.

- George wants his kingship back 

The explosion goes to plan with H and Puffy as witnesses.

--- ---

CANON DEATH: KARL 

Cause: Death by explosion and falling

--- ---

- George distracts Eret while Quackity, Sapnap and Karl steal his throne. Punz joins Eret’s side as one of his other knights.

 - The M.L. side reconvenes in L’manburg and drink invisibility potions. Dream is in Mexican L’manburg. He is tearing the dirt to shreds. Meanwhile, Eret gives a speech to his Knights as they head to Party Island. Dream, alone, is invisible in Boomerville.

- Sapnap gets Dream to log (he says it’s lag). The Dream SMP faction blows up M.L. with TNT. The Mexican L’manburgians kill Puffy. 

- They want to head to the Holy Land. Dream says he wants to talk. They collect at the Church.

- They argue. Dream threatens to kill Quackity permanently and make sure Mexican L’manburg can never rise again. (Also Karl’s acting is genuinely good holy shit)

- Sapnap tells George that he thinks Dream has completely turned against them, and that they’re better off disowning him.

---

Dream: “You’re painting me as this tyrant when I’m just trying to maintain peace.”

He refers to it as his castle, his throne. He calls the people of M.L. “terrorists.”

---

He says that in his eyes, Mexican L’manburg does not even exist, and that he’ll speak to Tubbo about making sure he sees that it doesn’t exist as well.

M.L. argues that putting a human life above a few blocks of gold is more important.

Dream refers to himself as the “ruler” of the Dream SMP, the “leader,” letting it slip that “king” is a meaningless title.

He says that Quackity is causing the most problems, the number one “enemy” of the SMP right now. Similar to how he referred to Tommy defying him.

He says that Quackity is not like Tubbo, who is a “fair, just ruler” and that is why New L’manburg is recognized and Mexican L’manburg is not. Tubbo would never do what Quackity did. Wilbur and Jschlatt and Tommy would. He says that he waited until New L’manburg had a reasonable leader to recognize it.

- “Un-killing” is implied to be a thing, where the person who gave you your canon death can take it back. 

---

 Dream: “The king is a figurehead and he knows that!”

Eret: “I do.”

Quackity: “So that’s what you are Eret -- a puppet--”

Dream: “Yes! -- no he’s not a puppet-- h-he has no power and I have - and - it’s the same thing and--”

(Dream proceeds to deny Eret being a “puppet”)

---

- Quackity decides to dissolve Mexican L’manburg for a clean slate and call it something else. He wants the server to have a precedent of establishing new countries without having to go to Dream for recognition every time.

- Eret agrees to recognize Quackity’s new country if they apologize and return the throne.

--- ---

CANON UNDEATHING: KARL (?)*

* Dream says that the death is still canon later since plot was based around it. I don’t know what Karl considers his death count to be? 

--- ---

- Sapnap declares that he no longer wants to fight Techno but Dream instead. He says he wants to slay Dream in front of everyone.

- Overall, Dream and Eret declare it a “failed coup” and say that the destruction is just a consequence of “what happens when you don’t plan anything” but Quackity is satisfied that his new country has been “put on the map.” 

- Quackity declares the country to be named “El Rapids” in honor of Cedar Rapids.

- Punz no longer wants to be an official Knight.

- Quackity misses Ghostbur and wants to speak with him. He tells Ghostbur about the war. Ghostbur asks if it was a revolution - Quackity says yes! Ghostbur also informs Quackity that he burnt the sacred texts - How to Sex 2 - in lava.

- Karl streams with the intention of rebuilding and preparing for Pokimane’s visit

- Karl steals Eret’s Museum Llamas and gets caught in the act. Fortunately this doesn’t spark up the war again. They take a llama to Party Island.

- They get into trouble at Boomerville and Lazar joins.

- Dream comes online and asks Sam about the prison’s progress. Bad gets annoyed at Sam for destroying the beachfront property value, and he didn’t authorize the seizure of the land. Dream is there helping to shovel but Bad wants him to stop. Bad is angry about the prison being built and starts shouting at Sam.

- Bad tries to negotiate with Dream. Dream refers to the prison as containing a “prisoner.” Singular. And that the prisoner would have nothing, and Bad would be in charge of helping to guard it. There are going to be multiple “layers.”

- The prison will be in the middle of the ocean bit, and Bad would have a terraformed beachfront property. All of the land would be considered property of the Badlands - including the prison.

- People are going to have to go through PORTALS to escape the prison.

- Bad starts to come around to the prison idea. Dream tells Sam he thinks they need more hands to help, potentially Ant and Eret.

- A strange, giant red “egg” has appeared in the corner of Bad’s statue room. He feels a strange aura coming from it, and he’s unable to bring himself to break it.

- Dream says Eret can’t help with the prison but he can help make the beach nicer. Bad says he might want to put Tommy in the prison but Dream says no, Tommy’s already exiled. So the prison isn’t for Tommy.

- Once the prisoner is in there, Dream says they would only be able to be let out “by the server.” It’s got certain secrets that only Dream and Sam know about. Sam says that he could potentially escape from it, but it will be so impenetrable that even if you know the secrets it would still be difficult to escape from.

- Bad shows Dream the Egg. Dream gets creeped out by it.

- Another Red Corruption has appeared near Hutt’s Pizza, and another at the Mansion. Everyone swears that it wasn’t there before, and there wasn’t enough time for someone to place all of it manually in the time that they were down there.

- Bad stabs Dream for trying to “hurt it.” He likes it for some reason.

- Bad asks Dream about who the prison’s for. Dream says “if you can’t kill somebody, you need to lock them up.” He mentions that it’s one of the more powerful people on the server, someone who either provides a threat now or in the future. He has someone in mind.

--- ---

Dream explains to Bad and Sam that the reason he switched sides in the Manberg-Pogtopia War was because Schlatt gave him something.

And that thing is “a card up his sleeve” until he needs it.

A book of great value.

It puts Dream in danger if people know of it, but also gives Dream power.

The “most valuable thing on the server.”

Something pertaining to the prison.

Something where they wouldn’t believe Dream if he told them what he was given.

--- ---

- The corruption grows AGAIN despite Dream, Sam and Bad all being in the middle of the ocean

- Another corruption appears on Tommy’s Power Tower

- The water level in New L’manburg has risen again, covering George and Quackity’s mushroom house

- The prison is going to be as tall as a MOUNTAIN

- Dream proposes the idea of Bad giving him the disc to piss off Tommy. Bad says that Skeppy has it so he’ll have to ask some other time. He might trade some information about Schlatt’s book in return for the disc.

- Bad says he likes the name a dono came up with for the corruption -- “Blood Vines”

- Dream and Sam removed the Blood Vines on the Mansion to Bad’s dismay. Sam burns the Vines and Bad goes on a murderous rampage against him.

- Technoblade got a “Bee our guest” achievement

- Dream burns down the Eiffel Tower again.

- The prison will be reinforced with 15 layers of obsidian, and the guards will have Ender Pearl Stasis Chambers that are alarm-activated.

- The Blood Vines have sprouted up from Schlatt’s Grave.

The prison’s unofficial name as of right now is “Pandora’s Vault,” but it is subject to change.

Upcoming events:

- Karl will be touring Pokimane around soon

Potentially Scrapped:

- Elytra Challenge

- Bad and Skeppy’s plan to burn the disc *

* Bad mentioned it on stream, but it’s unclear if it’ll still happen

END OF WEEK RECAP:

11/30: Fundy bonds with Wilbur, Cursed Lore Day

12/01: Creation of Mexican L’manburg, Girl Dream visits, Mexican Manhunt

Note: not sure what’s up with 12/02. Probably messed up the dates? Whoops.

12/03: Sleepy Bois Family splits in half, dethroning of George

12/04: Day of the Exile, Badlands start to divide

12/05: Tommy’s first full day in Logsted, Sean’s visit

12/06: The Mexican L’manburg Revolution, end of M.L., start of El Rapids

---

!!! SPOILERS AHEAD !!! 

- Wilbur had two special lodestone compasses in his inventory. He didn’t want HBomb to see, but H looked anyway.

[aboveallarescuer]

I love that Daenerys Targaryen has significant parallels with all the major ASOIAF characters (as well as with many of the minor and the historical ones too). I love that comparing and contrasting her with them almost always highlights her epicness and/or how special her place in the narrative is.

Daenerys Targaryen is not just a queen, she’s a queen regnant and Lord of the Seven Kingdoms, i.e., a she-king. This means that she can be compared and contrasted not only with Cersei and Margaery or with Alysanne and the other Targaryen queens consort, but also (in fact, especially) with Stannis and Robb or with Aegon the Conqueror and the other Targaryen monarchs that succeeded him.

Daenerys Targaryen is not just a claimant to the Iron Throne like Stannis, Young Griff and Renly, she’s the only one of them who is a POV character.

Daenerys Targaryen is not just one of the POV rulers, she also happens to be the only POV ruler with power in her own right and who isn’t in a subservient position in any way (Jon is Lord Commander, but he’s also the king’s advisor and is running the equivalent of a penal colony, so the stakes are much lower than Daenerys ruling a city and dealing with opposition from half the world; Tyrion and Ned are Hands of the King; Cersei is queen regent, which means that her power stems from Tommen’s kingship). Also, Daenerys has the clearest parallels with Aragorn and her ADWD storyline was deliberately written by GRRM as a response to the lack of information from Tolkien about what makes Aragorn a good king. Finally, if one compares her ADWD storyline with Jon’s, one can see how many roles she occupies at the same time: the administrator (Jon), the monarch (Stannis), the most magical character linked to fire and prophecies (Melisandre) and the leader of the disenfranchised (Mance; note that Daenerys was forced to leave her homeland, was enslaved and currently doesn’t belong anywhere - that’s the exact same situation of many of the former slaves of Slaver’s Bay, who come from different places and have different races, ethnicities and backgrounds. Daenerys empathized with them right away because she is one of them. Her detractors may accuse her of being an outsider, but that’s because they prioritize the viewpoint of the Ghiscari slavers. The freedmen, like Daenerys, come from many different places and are outsiders to the noblemen too).

Daenerys Targaryen is an extraordinary conqueror and strategist. Aegon the Conqueror made the Westerosi bend the knee with the help of his dragons, 15-year-old Daenerys Targaryen overthrew the slave masters primarily thanks to her own battle plans, not her dragons. Robb Stark captured castles in the westerlands motivated by personal injury and his actions had local impact; Daenerys Targaryen conquered three cities motivated by her desire to abolish slavery and her actions had worldwide impact.

Daenerys Targaryen is not a typical member of her family, she is the main leader and representative of House Targaryen in a way that Jon/Bran/Arya/Sansa or Cersei/Jaime/Tyrion can’t ever claim to be. Their fathers Ned Stark and Tywin Lannister had large roles in the main story and, in the Starks’ case, their older brother Robb is more well-remembered than any of them (at least so far). Meanwhile, Daenerys’s father Aerys II was already dead before she was born and before the main story began, which allowed her to carve her own path outside of his influence. Moreover, her accomplishments are already greater than both of her older brothers’. She became the face of her family in a way that matches (in fact, even surpasses) Ned with House Stark and Tywin with House Lannister.

Daenerys Targaryen is not a typical mother, she’s both Mother of Dragons and Mhysa. Her motherhood is transcendental in a way that Catelyn’s or Cersei’s aren’t because it is not related to blood ties or to her fertility. Instead, it’s associated with her unprecedented feat of reviving an extinct species, with her ability to make up the magic as she goes along, with her leadership, with her revolutionary nature, with her compassion for thousands of people. Additionally, unlike the other major mothers, Daenerys is the only one who isn’t doomed to go “mad” despite all the losses and hardships she faced.

Daenerys Targaryen is a hero, which is especially clear when her actions are contrasted with House Stark’s, whose brand of “heroism” has been mostly to react to personal injury so far. Ned Stark participated in Robert's Rebellion because his father and brother were killed. Ned’s son Robb wanted Northern independence because his father was killed. Ned’s vassals want to start another war in the name of the Starks because of their loyalty and their outrage about the Red Wedding. Their motivations, sympathetic as they may be, have never involved the commoners. In contrast, GRRM had Daenerys empathize with the former slaves, start a war in their name and abolish slavery despite them not being associated with her through oath of fealty or blood relations or lands. She was specifically singled out by the author as the one leader who “wants equality for everyone”. It’s a stark contrast (pun intended) to the actions of the main family (at least as a unit) of the story. Sadly, it’s easier (for some fans) to root for the heroes mostly reacting to personal injury who never made any mistakes of large scale consequences since they never got to be in authority. Or for the heroes fighting against ice zombies (though, to be fair, Jon haven’t even faced them in ADWD, his main challenge was to conciliate the Free Folk and the Night’s Watch, so the stakes of his storyline are much lower when one compares his problems with Dany dealing with enemies from all over Essos raising armies to defeat her). It’s harder to do the same with the hero who takes an active stance against social injustices and who wrestles with hard questions about when political violence is justified (which never have easy, clear-cut answers) and all the negative ramifications that come with them.

Oh, and have I mentioned that Daenerys Targaryen is the character with the most overt clues of being Azor Ahai/Prince That Was Promised/Stallion Who Mounts the World? Like with the birth of the dragons, uniting all the khalasars and then leading humanity to victory against the Others will be two more unparalleled feats of hers among the characters of the current timeline. Additionally, as she becomes surrounded and influenced by prophecies, we get to see how Daenerys has a healthy relationship with them in contrast to other characters like Cersei and Stannis.

All these attributes and accomplishments are made even more remarkable when one contrasts them with what doesn’t necessarily make Daenerys Targaryen unique. Yes, Daenerys became the most powerful person in her world, but she also lived in poverty among lowborn people without the privilege of a castle or a formal education, which lends itself to comparisons with Davos and Melisandre. Yes, Daenerys is a queen, but she’s also a young girl who loves songs and stories and idealizes her family members, which lends itself to comparisons with Arya, Brienne and Sansa. Yes, Daenerys is a loving, compassionate mother, but she was also raised by her abuser throughout all of her formative years, which lends itself to comparisons with dysfunctional families like the Lannisters, the Greyjoys and the Cleganes. And so on.

Daenerys Targaryen has a very special place in the narrative, which I think should be acknowledged not only to appreciate her character, but also to understand why GRRM chose to isolate her from everyone else. Why would GRRM be confident that his readers would still be interested in Daenerys despite the fact that she doesn’t interact with any of his other major characters for most of the story? Is it merely because of her dragons, as her detractors say?

No.

It’s because, as the list above showed, Daenerys’s narrative importance and accomplishments are unmatched. They had to be. Daenerys’s character and storyline had to be connected to pretty much everyone else’s in significant, thematic ways in order for her to earn an entire continent, as well as her place as the Fire of ASOIAF. That is why Daenerys is guaranteed to have a major role in all the three main plotlines of ASOIAF. That is why Daenerys is so iconic and represents this book series in a way that no individual Stark could ever do. That is why Daenerys has to be so many things at the same time: a POV character and a claimant to the Iron Throne, a mother and the main representative of her family, the most powerful person in her world and a former slave, a ruler and a conqueror, a she-king and a young girl, quite possibly the story’s main hero and savior. That no other ASOIAF character can come close to her narrative importance or to her in-universe accomplishments is kind of the point because Daenerys had to encompass everything that is great about ASOIAF in order to carry her own storyline. And I'm excited for TWOW because, as she moves closer to Westeros, her importance will only increase more and more.

Daenerys Targaryen is like fine wine. She gets better and better the more time passes, the more you think about her and the more you realize how all the other ASOIAF storylines somehow lead back to hers. Dany’s storyline almost always looks that much more epic and greater in comparison to them because she carries her storyline on her own, so the author had to make sure she caught our attention.

[gffa]

Do you think one could follow the Jedi Code/Lifestyle in real life as a positive manner of living or do you think it only works in Star Wars? I asked this on r/Mawinstallation and the answers I got were either:

''The Jedi code is oppressive so no'' ( this was the most upvoted answer )

''The Jedi code works but only for the Jedi''

''The Jedi code requires the force to work and since the force doesn't exist in the real world, the code cannot work''

And finally, I got only a single reply that said

''Yes, the Jedi code does work in real life, that's the entire point of Star Wars''.

What is your take on this?

This is going to be sort of a long, roundabout answer, but the short version is: In the finer details, we're not space psychics, but as a general idea? Yes. First of all, what even IS the Jedi Code?  Are we talking about the whole “there is no emotion, there is peace”/”emotion, yet peace” meditation mantra, which we should point out is nowhere in the movies or TV shows, but is entirely in the novels and comics supplementary material?  Are we talking about a more generalized idea of Jedi philosophy?  And what, precisely, does that mean?  I mean, what’s oppressive about it and what scene evidences that that’s what the Jedi taught? Second, there are two talks that George Lucas gave that I think really illustrate this view of emotional navigation and how that impacts Star Wars and the Force: There’s the writers meeting of The Clone Wars where he talks about the light side and the dark side and there’s an Academy of Achievement Speech from 2013 where he talks about joy vs pleasure:     “Happiness is pleasure and happiness is joy. It can be either one, you add them up and it can be the uber category of happiness.     “Pleasure is short lived. It lasts an hour, it lasts a minute, it lasts a month. It peaks and then it goes down–it peaks very high, but the next time you want to get that same peak you have to do it twice as much. It’s like drugs, you have to keep doing it because it insulates itself. No matter what it is, whether you’re shopping or you’re engaged in any other kind of pleasure. It all has the same quality about it.     “On the other hand is joy and joy is the thing that doesn’t go as high as pleasure, in terms of your emotional reaction. But it stays with you. Joy is something you can recall, pleasure you can’t.  So the secret is that, even though it’s not as intense as pleasure, the joy will last you a lot longer.     “People who get the pleasure they keep saying, ‘Well, if I can just get richer and get more cars–!’ You’ll never relive the moment you got your first car, that’s it, that’s the highest peak. Yes, you could get three Ferraris and a new gulf stream jet and maybe you’ll get close. But you have to keep going and eventually you’ll run out.  You just can’t do it, it doesn’t work.     “If you’re trying to sustain that level of peak pleasure, you’re doomed. It’s a very American idea, but it just can’t happen. You just let it go. Peak.  Break. Pleasure is fun it’s great, but you can’t keep it going forever.     “Just accept the fact that it’s here and it’s gone, and maybe again it’ll come back and you’ll get to do it again. Joy lasts forever. Pleasure is purely self-centered. It’s all about your pleasure, it’s about you. It’s a selfish self-centered emotion, that’s created by self-centered motive of greed.     “Joy is compassion, joy is giving yourself to somebody else or something else. And it’s the kind of thing that is in it’s subtlty and lowness more powerful than pleasure.  If you get hung up on pleasure you’re doomed. If you pursue joy you will find everlasting happiness.”  –George Lucas And how I like to compare that to The Hijacking of the American Mind by Robert Lustig, MD, MSL, which is a book about how corporations have hijacked our pleasure centers to make us focused on reward over pleasure.  It talks about the exact same concepts, with only slight word adjustments, but otherwise might as well be verbatim: “At this point it’s essential to define and clarify what I mean by these two words—pleasure and happiness—which can mean different things to different people.     “Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary defines “pleasure” as “enjoyment or satisfaction derived from what is to one’s liking”; or “gratification”; or “reward.” While “pleasure” has a multitude of synonyms, it is this phenomenon of reward that we will explore, as scientists have elaborated a specific “reward pathway” in the brain, and we now understand the neuroscience of its regulation. Conversely, “happiness” is defined as “the quality or state of being happy”; or “joy”; or “contentment.” While there are many synonyms for “happiness,” it is the phenomenon that Aristotle originally referred to as eudemonia, or the internal experience of contentment, that we will parse in this book. Contentment is the lowest baseline level of happiness, the state in which it’s not necessary to seek more. In the movie Lovers and Other Strangers (1970), middle-aged married couple Beatrice Arthur and Richard Castellano were asked the question “Are you happy?”—to which they responded, “Happy? Who’s happy? We’re content.” Scientists now understand that there is a specific “contentment pathway” that is completely separate from the pleasure or reward pathway in the brain and under completely different regulation. Pleasure (reward) is the emotional state where your brain says, This feels good—I want more, while happiness (contentment) is the emotional state where your brain says, This feels good—I don’t want or need any more.     “Reward and contentment are both positive emotions, highly valued by humans, and both reasons for initiative and personal betterment. It’s hard to be happy if you derive no pleasure for your efforts—but this is exactly what is seen in the various forms of addiction. Conversely, if you are perennially discontent, as is so often seen in patients with clinical depression, you may lose the impetus to better your social position in life, and it’s virtually impossible to derive reward for your efforts. Reward and contentment rely on the presence of the other. Nonetheless, they are decidedly different phenomena. Yet both have been slowly and mysteriously vanishing from our global ethos as the prevalence of addiction and depression continues to climb.     “Drumroll … without further ado, behold the seven differences between reward and contentment: Reward is short-lived (about an hour, like a good meal). Get it, experience it, and get over it. Why do you think you can’t remember what you ate for dinner yesterday? Conversely, contentment lasts much longer (weeks to months to years). It’s what happens when you have a working marriage or watch your teenager graduate from high school. And if you experience contentment from a sense of achievement or purpose, the chances are that you will feel it for a long time to come, perhaps even the rest of your life.Reward is visceral in terms of excitement (e.g., a casino, a football game, or a strip club). It activates the body’s fight-or-flight system, which causes blood pressure and heart rate to go up. Conversely, contentment is ethereal and calming (e.g., listening to soothing music or watching the waves of the ocean). It makes your heart rate slow and your blood pressure decline.       - “ Reward can be achieved with different substances (e.g., heroin, nicotine, cocaine, caffeine, alcohol, and of course sugar). Each stimulates the reward center of the brain. Some are legal, some are not. Conversely, contentment is not achievable with substance use. Rather, contentment is usually achieved with deeds (like graduating from college or having a child who can navigate his or her own path in life).       - “Reward occurs with the process of taking (like from a casino). Gambling is definitely a high: when you win, it is fundamentally rewarding, both viscerally and economically. But go back to the same table the next day. Maybe you’ll feel a jolt of excitement to try again. But there’s no glow, no lasting feeling from the night before. Or go buy a nice dress at Macy’s. Then try it on again a month later. Does it generate the same enthusiasm? Conversely, contentment is often generated through giving (like giving money to a charity, or giving your time to your child, or devoting time and energy to a worthwhile project).       - Reward is yours and yours alone. Your sense of reward does not immediately impact anyone else. Conversely, your contentment, or lack of it, often impacts other people directly and can impact society at large. Those who are extremely unhappy (the Columbine shooters) can take their unhappiness out on others. It should be said at this point that pleasure and happiness are by no means mutually exclusive. A dinner at the Bay Area Michelin three-star restaurant the French Laundry can likely generate simultaneous pleasure for you from the stellar food and wine but can also generate contentment from the shared experience with spouse, family, or friends, and then possibly a bit of unhappiness when the bill arrives.       - Reward when unchecked can lead us into misery, like addiction. Too much substance use (food, drugs, nicotine, alcohol) or compulsive behaviors (gambling, shopping, surfing the internet, sex) will overload the reward pathway and lead not just to dejection, destitution, and disease but not uncommonly death as well. Conversely, walking in the woods or playing with your grandchildren or pets (as long as you don’t have to clean up after them) could bring contentment and keep you from being miserable in the first place.       - Last and most important, reward is driven by dopamine, and contentment by serotonin. Each is a neurotransmitter—a biochemical manufactured in the brain that drives feelings and emotions—but the two couldn’t be more different. Although dopamine and serotonin drive separate brain processes, it is where they overlap and how they influence each other that generates the action in this story. Two separate chemicals, two separate brain pathways, two separate regulatory schemes, and two separate physiological and psychological outcomes. How and where these two chemicals work, and how they work either in concert or in opposition to each other, is the holy grail in the ultimate quest for both pleasure and happiness.”                                – Robert Lustig, MD, MSL And then lets add in what Dave Filoni has said about the Force and the core themes of Star Wars:     "In the end, it’s about fundamentally becoming selfless moreso than selfish.  It seems so simple, but it’s so hard to do.  And when you’re tempted by the dark side, you don’t overcome it once in life and then you’re good.  It’s a constant.  And that’s what, really, Star Wars is about and what I think George wanted people to know.  That to be a good person and to really feel better about your life and experience life fully you have to let go of everything you fear to lose. Because then you can’t be controlled.        “But when you fear, fear is the path to the dark side, it’s also the shadow of greed, because greed makes you covet things, greed makes you surround yourself with all these things that make you feel comfortable in the moment, but they don’t really make you happy.  And then, when you’re afraid of something, it makes you angry, when you get angry, you start to hate something, sometimes you don’t even know why.  When you hate, do you often know why you hate?  No, you direct it at things and then you hate it.  And it’s hard because anger can be a strength at times, but you can’t use it in such a selfish way, it can be a destroyer then.        “These are the core things of Star Wars.“  –Dave Filoni So, the core things of Star Wars and the Jedi teachings (because Jedi teachings are basically almost word for word how GL described how the Force works) can very much be a reflection of real world teachings and ways to live by, because all of the above are about how GL viewed the world and what he wanted to put into his movies. Further, Jedi teachings are basically just reworded Buddhism + Acceptance and Commitment Therapy.  And both of those are very livable by our real world standards, if you so choose.  GL was very much about how SW had themes that were meant to be picked up on by the audience and even DF has said this:  “ Jedi have the ability to turn the tide, to make a significant moment, to give hope where there’s none.  That’s their ultimate role to play, to be this example of selflessness.  And that’s what makes them a hero, when no one else can match that heroic thing.  And then our job is to emulate that, to use that example, and further our own lives.” --Dave Filoni Ultimately, the Jedi are specifically focused on disciplining themselves (which GL has said is the only way to overcome the dark side, in that TCW writers’ meeting), probably to a degree most of us wouldn’t have the room to devote to, but that doesn’t mean that the broader strokes aren’t meant to be applicable to our lives or don’t echo real world teachings.

[valkyrieandstrangeridingaragorn]

The Breaking of “Narrative Promises” Through the Lens of Supernatural, Marvel, & More

[Article: x]

The tone shift from Infinity War to Endgame is so jarring that it is metaphorically neck-breaking. [...] Instead of continuing the narrative arc set forth, Endgame relies only on moments that never build into really anything.

One of the most painful narrative promises that is yanked back, for some fans, is the one the audience is offered in their first realizations something has gone wrong when, of all the characters, Bucky Barnes is the first to vanish into dust in front of Steve Rogers.

[...]

The most glaring of these moments comes in the early scenes of Endgame, when Steve is sitting in therapy listening to a man describe the pain of losing his partner to the snap and, in response, Steve is not allowed to use the scene to acknowledge his own pain from the events of Infinity War, but rather discusses losing Peggy. Whether one sees the relationship between Bucky and Steve as romantic or simply intimate, he is the clear choice for Steve’s therapy discussion, as the resonant figure the story has told viewers Steve, specifically, lost to the snap.

In terms of where the story has taken its viewers, Steve lost Bucky to the snap five years prior and is in a discussion group for snap survivors. It is the highlighted thought and the purpose to have the discussion at all. Peggy, meanwhile, who Steve has yet no knowledge of being in the future of his narrative, was lost to natural causes almost a decade before that therapy scene. This moment was kissed with Bucky’s name and would also have been an appropriate place to discuss Steve’s other losses, Sam or Wanda, but the narrative suddenly, sharply implies whatever story the audience had been watching in prior movies about Steve and his future family is gone.

This feeling is underscored again when Steve looks at the compass with Peggy’s image before going to face Thanos. Narratively, she has nothing to do with Thanos. Narratively, this would be a great moment to think about the people Steve lost because of the Titan as motivation for embarking upon his defeat.

And in fact, though Tony, for instance, thinks about Peter from time to time and even tells Steve, “I lost the kid,” Bucky’s name is never mentioned in grief by Steve. The brief emotionality Steve faces is attributed to anything but this. It is carefully given to the overall state of the world, vaguely, to losing Peggy, from out of the blue, but never to watching Bucky fade from his life again, for a traumatic fourth time, the way the death scene in Infinity War whispered that it would. There is never an exploration of that pain while Bucky is gone, and glaringly, a mirror to the loss, a reunion, on the battlefield or off, is never given to the fans that felt most intensely what the story asked of them to feel.

And of course, literally and more harrowingly, the whole promise of Steve’s arc across his many movies is undone by Endgame, as Steve’s project of growth, evolution, and settling into a new life and home in the future is suddenly and determinedly wiped clean to fulfill an arc that gathered dust for a decade.

This is time that was allotted to these storylines by canon, offering an expectation of meaning and importance, offering what results in a promise—not time the fans imagined or made up, not something they feel nebulously entitled to, but time they spent on plots the canon gave to them.

But instead of saying, yes, you spent all this time watching these scenes, feeling these moments, taking this in—you grew with this character, with these relationships (grew in many cases away from the set starting point)—here is your promised meaning, again and again, these properties snatch the rug away and then pretend blithely they cannot understand why “entitled fans” are so upset.

And just to be clear, this is not “just about the ship,” it is about the story. In many cases, the ship and the story are, indeed, inextricably linked, because the story is the basis of the ship. But I promise that not a singular person truly believed that Marvel would make Stucky a romantic relationship in Endgame—not one. But what they did believe was that there would be even a breath given to the meaning of this relationship, after it was at the center of Steve Rogers’ arc for so long—a belief that was promised to them by everything in nearly every part of Steve’s story, by Steve watching Bucky disappear into a puff of dust, up until the last.

But instead of a promised reunion, there was a loss, and then a loss, and nothing—the narrative, the relationship, the friendship, sacrificed on the altar. And, if in the cases of Dean & Cas and Jaime & Brienne, if the fans did truly believe the ship could happen, it is because the story led them there. While it is not “just about the ship,” it does not feel coincidental that the reneging of narrative promises happens to characters and relationships that orbit queer ships so often. In fact, it feels purposeful.

[ruby-whistler]

You've probably talked about this kinda thing before (I'm willing to hunt down the post if so), but I'm pretty new to your blog and I'm curious; what makes you like c!Dream so much? Other than, like, his potential - or the skill that went into writing him - I mean specifically as a character, what causes you to sympathize with him as opposed to others like Wilbur or Quackity?

If it's personal you obviously don't have to answer! I've just read tons of posts like that from c!Tommy apologists and I realized I'd never read one from the other side of things (so to speak) and I think you present your ideas and stuff rly well :p

Alright, I’ve made a couple of replies like this, but this one is going in the masterpost to later link it to people - thank you for your interest, and I hope you don’t mind this one being a bit detailed.

Initially, on more of an emotional level, the answer to that question would be Dr3. It was how I got into Dream apologism, it justified my compassion for the character, and made me feel more comfortable where the rest of the fandom was overwhelmingly negative.

The c!Dream that people portray seems unsympathetic, and pretty fitting on the surface - a relentless manipulative villain with an insatiate thirst for power who threw away his friends in order to gain control over others for the sake of being on top.

Until you actually look into canon, and do some analysis, and realize that's,,, rather far from the truth.

See, the thing about c!Dream is, that he's a person much like anyone else in the story. He's not a "villain" or some morally black character only because of his actions. It's all about context, which doesn't excuse actions, but it might explain them and make an impact on the way we view the character himself.

In this fandom, people usually look at him, and then throw both accurate characterization and any of that context out the window.

Because power, and hurting people, and chaos isn't his goal or his motive. It's a means to an end. Everything is a means to the end to this character, including himself, which I find fascinating.

Is it wrong to do? Yes. Will it get him closer to his goals? Yes? Then he's going to do it, no matter who gets hurt in the process. No matter if he gets hurt in the process.

And this ruthlessness is not inspired by cruelty, this efficiency isn't out of enjoyment. It's out of genuine attachment and perhaps even desperation, but that's difficult to get into.

He's had such a downward spiral into doing continuously worse things - and for what? For control? For power? No, he never cared about that in the first place, why would he start now?

Do you know what he did care about?

His friends. The server. The people he feels responsible for.

c!Dream's goals have never been selfish at all, no matter how much people try to paint it that way. His ends were always for others - considering how likely the theory that he got himself locked up on purpose is, that enforces the sentiment even more.

If he didn't care about the server, why would he fight against L'Manberg and then list his reasons for it always as reasons "we" had? He pretty much never used "I" when talking about it, I know because I counted it.

If he didn't care about the people, why would he stand against Schlatt - despite understandably still despising L'Manberg - and actively support them in getting their country back when he could've just left them alone? Schlatt wasn't hurting him. Wilbur taking a tiny piece of land wasn't threatening him.

Manberg was threatening the server's peace, which is why he fought against it. L'Manberg threatened (and ruined) the server's relative peace and unity, which is why he fought against it.

It was never him fighting to control the server, it was him fighting for the server and the people in it, even if he ended up hurting them in the process, and that's pretty clear from analysing his motives before the second season.

And yeah, his thinking is flawed, I noticed - but cc!Dream has confirmed his goal in the end is for everyone to get along and, well, stop hurting each other, as well as him having an "ends justify the means" mentality.

And I guess that silent realization of - hell, he cares - was what drew me to have such a strong attachment towards the character.

So thinking about him forcing himself to do all this terrible stuff - about him being stuck powerless inside a cell, hurt over and over again - about just how desperate he must've been, alternatively, how ready to sacrifice himself he must've been back at the Finale.

If you recontextualize the story from c!Dream's perspective, it all falls into this picture of someone who wanted to protect people more than anything, and who cared more than anyone, and ended up losing everything, not entirely by his own fault, but because of the cycle of violence he was actively trying to stop.

The road to hell is paved with good intentions.

Dream is incredibly selfless both in his overarching goals, and in his smaller more immediate ones. He will, more often than not, put himself in a disadvantageous situation if it means his friends or allies aren’t caught in the crossfire or harmed.

His relationship with his friends - Punz, George and Sapnap specifically - is incredibly tragic. He wanted to protect Punz, he showed genuine concern about him, he was willing to have one less person on his side just so that people wouldn't target him.

He wanted to protect George, but he hurt him in the process, because he was too caught up in being in the right, and Sapnap was distraught thanks to Tommy telling him that Dream doesn't care about him, and Quackity who despised Dream was there to fan the flames, so they fell apart rather easily.

He wanted to protect the cat, and he failed.

He wanted to protect Techno, stand up to Quackity, and he failed.

If you think about it, he failed to protect everyone miserably.

Alright before I break down sobbing incoherently - as you can probably see, my sympathy towards c!Dream doesn't come from him being a good person to any degree, more from just incredible amounts of sadness.

You see, c!Dream is a very reserved character, and he puts up the "cruel scary villain" front on purpose, and he doesn't talk about his emotions on purpose. However what we see of him is pretty much enough to classify him as a rather tragic character.

Most of his actions, with enough context, shift the way I think about the character in a more positive direction only because if I like the way a character is written, it's going to bleed into my feelings for the character himself. Ruthless villains are my jam. A character being fun to analyse and too complex to complicate further is pretty much the only thing I need to become attached.

Did I mention the prison arc yet? I cannot see a character suffering and not be sympathetic, I don't think that's a thing with me. Healing arc potential, isn't it?

A lot of people also relate to the character on a deeply personal level! Trauma responses such as cutting people off and emotionally isolating yourself, trying to regain control of your environment or to get back the past, some people even relate to,, what's being done to him during the prison arc. There's definitely some amount of projection going on, but I'd say I only do it to a degree where when I'm depressed I'll start relentlessly posting about a healing arc.

It's just hard to see a villain with good intentions hurt and alone, even if he's done terrible things, and not feel some amount of empathy. Most people don't care to see him that way, but my blog's mostly a place for those who do.

Anyways, here are some essays to check out perhaps if you've read this far that elaborate on some of the points further-

[ x ] [ x ] [ x ] [ x ] [ x ] [ x ]

- and here's an explanation like this from a fellow Dream apologist. Might be useful to get multiple perspectives on the subject. Feel free to also send asks if you have any questions! That's what I'm here for.

[juliabohemian]

oh dear

I have noticed a number of posts circulating which imply that ANY character being mean to Loki EVER and for ANY reason = abuse.

I will admit that I initially felt mostly irritation at what appeared, on the surface, to constitute such a complete and utter lack of critical thinking. What I’ve realized, though, is that people who make such posts definitely believe what they are saying. And like everything people do and say, there’s a deeper reason for it. The fact is, traumatized characters attract traumatized fans. And not all of those fans are in a good place, emotionally. And those people are perfectly valid, even if the conclusions they draw are not.

When it comes to fiction, good characters are complex. That means they are conflicted and flawed. They make mistakes. They lash out when they are afraid or hurting. They sometimes hurt other characters. Loki fits that bill very well. It’s one of the reasons he is so popular. Not just with traumatized people, but with people in general. He’s relatable.

The problem comes when fans relate to fictional characters, but really aren’t conscious of why, because they aren’t all that conscious of themselves. They haven’t done a whole lot of self-reflection. Maybe because they aren’t ready, because their trauma is too fresh. Or maybe they are still living in crisis and don’t have the freedom to self-reflect. Those possibilities are all valid.

But very often, when a person goes through trauma and doesn’t have the luxury (and yes, it is a luxury) of working through it, their reasoning skills can become flawed as a result. Trauma, especially childhood trauma, tends to have a negative effect on our ability to socialize and form intimate relationships, because it damages our ability to interpret the intentions of others. We call this hostile attribution bias.

The problem with hostile attribution bias, is that it makes it difficult to tell when people genuinely mean you harm. If a person’s words, actions, or facial expressions are ambiguous in any way, they will be interpreted as being hostile in nature. This keeps one on the offensive, constantly, always anticipating the next blow. Very often, no such blow is coming. But it doesn’t matter. Fear is real, and the experience of it is real.

It stands to reason that someone who struggles to interpret the intentions of real-life people would also experience the same difficulty with fictional characters. For instance, fans who identify with Loki because they perceive him as being a victim will have a hard time seeing him as anything else. Thus, anyone who harms Loki in any way is just further proof that the universe is against him and always will be.

This is referred to as an external locus of control. It means that a person sees life as something that is happening TO them, and that they are powerless to affect the outcome. It’s also important to note that people with this mentality struggle deeply to heal from their trauma. They are stuck in a sort of Groundhog Day scenario, living the same thing out over and over again. Because of their flawed perception, everything that happens to them feels like an extension of that initial trauma.

So, it would make perfect sense that a person with a history of trauma, who suffers from attribution bias, and who has an external locus of control, would be extremely uncomfortable watching anything bad happen to Loki. In fact, it would probably be traumatic for them.

And while their feelings and their experience of those feelings are 100% real, their perception of reality is not entirely accurate. In other words, what they think is happening is not necessarily what is happening.

Loki’s initial trauma, believe it or not, was just being abandoned as an infant. Even though he can’t remember it, that experience alone can result in lifelong emotional struggles. In real life, we refer to this as an attachment disorder. A person with an attachment disorder usually develops major issues with abandonment. They also suffer from (wait for it) attribution bias. And that bias absolutely affects their perception.

Loki’s next trauma was being raised in a dysfunctional family. Not only were they dysfunctional, but they weren’t a very good fit for Loki. Loki was a quiet, contemplative person. He was a thinker, an intellectual. He would rather read or do magic. So, not a good fit for Asgardian society. The combination of Loki’s initial trauma, with his inherent temperament, and his dysfunctional family is what led to the inevitable breakdown that is regarded as Loki’s “villain” arc. I’d like to point out that, in reality, such a person would have probably suffered a breakdown much sooner than that. Typically, prior to reaching adulthood.

Loki’s next trauma was encountering Thanos. Now, we have no idea exactly what happened between Loki and Thanos. We know only that it wasn’t good and that it resulted in Loki being absolutely terrified of him. Other than that, details are fuzzy. I think it’s fair to assume that whatever mistreatment Loki endured probably qualified as torture. Whether it was physical or psychological, we cannot know for sure.

While Loki’s Thanos-related trauma was NOT an extension of his family-related trauma, his decision to entangle himself with Thanos was a product of that trauma. By which I mean that his willingness to align himself with someone like Thanos came from a place of desperation, and a desire to prove himself to someone who he perceived as being qualified to validate him.

So, fast forward to the LOKI show. Our version of Loki never returned to Asgard in chains, was never told that it was his birthright to die, nor endured any gaslighting from Ragnarok-Thor. He never got his neck broken by Thanos. He never went through any of that. He arrived at the TVA, fresh off his failed attempt to take over planet Earth. He was all fired up and defensive, as anyone in his situation would probably be.

Now, here’s where we need to put our critical thinking caps on. Because, I hate to tell you this, folks...but unlike most of the Loki content we’ve gotten prior, this content is actually well written. It’s VERY well written. And while it might be tempting to respond to it with pure emotion, it is imperative that we don’t abandon all logic and reason. This show is not an extension of the gauntlet of trauma we’ve watched Loki endure since he first appeared on screen. The creative minds involved in this venture ALL care deeply about Loki’s character and want to see him succeed (whatever that means for him).

Enter Mobius. He’s a cog in a very big machine. He likes to think of himself as being more than that. He establishes a rapport with his boss in the hopes of distinguishing himself from his peers. His interest in his work is personal. He likes what he does.

From Mobius’ point of view, Loki is an asset. He has information that could help solve the bigger puzzle. But Mobius exists in a world that affords him access to multiple realities. He has probably met dozens of Lokis. And he has probably seen hundreds of people casually pruned or executed or reset. It’s just part of the world he happens to be in. And he doesn’t question it, because he has been brainwashed.

So, does Mobius attempt to manipulate Loki? Absolutely. Just another day at the office. And it works, because he knows Loki better than Loki knows himself, has studied him and other Lokis. And it’s hard not to be mad at Mobius for causing Loki pain. Especially when that is followed up by Loki eagerly taking Mobius up on his offer to help track down the other Loki variant.

I think some people might find Loki’s enthusiasm disconcerting. And there are certainly aspects of it that can be considered such. Loki, at his core, just wants to be told that he is doing a good job, that his contributions matter. That part of him is definitely a product of trauma. But is Loki motivated entirely by his trauma? Not really. Despite his manipulations, Mobius offers Loki the closest thing to warmth and compassion that he has seen for a while. Some of that is genuine and some of that is not. And faced with the reality that everything he knows is gone, Loki does what most people in his situation would do, he tries to be productive. He gets busy. He distracts himself. Because at the moment, little else is under his control.

Despite all of that, you simply cannot have compassion for Loki and none for Mobius. Because Mobius is a victim too. He was abducted from his own reality. He is living a lie. He is part of something that, upon deeper reflection, he realizes he doesn’t agree with. He is so very much like the Loki we first met in 2011. He is such a well-written and multi-faceted character, I thoroughly enjoy his on screen time with Loki.

But I understand that there are people who are not in a place, emotionally, where they can overlook such plot devices. And I sincerely hope that those eventually people find healing. In the meantime, let’s try to remember that this is a work of fiction. And unlike real-life trauma, when it becomes upsetting, we can turn it off and walk away.