#at the beginning of this year my ex best friend reached out to me and i cautiously let her back into my life

[cheekblush]

i'd rather be friendless than to constantly have my boundaries disrespected

[ja3yun]

please be real | p.js

ex!jay x fem!reader warnings: angst, heartache, smut (mdni), fingering, unprotected sex, cream pie, teasing, pet names (princess, baby), crying, mentions of alcohol, drunk jay, pure heartbreak in the beginning, not proofread, anything else lmk synopsis: after a six-year relationship, you and jongseong part ways due to different needs for the future. when jongseong's first birthday post-breakup arrives, his struggle with your absence reaches a breaking point, prompting a late-night call from his friend that consequently reignites emotions and unresolved feelings. wc: 9.4k a/n: hi! it's me and it's jay's birthday so i wrote him a little something something. i didn't initially intend to rip my heart out as i wrote this yet here i am. this was oddly a healing one to write but i must warn you it does mention the reader not wanting to have children so if that doesn't appeal to you then this probs isn't the fic for you! as always, like, comments, feedback, etc. is all appreciated! ilysm and happy bday jay <3

A sharp, jarring noise pierces your ears, the peaceful sleep you were in rudely disrupted. You groan out loud, covering your face with your covers but it does nothing to stop the ringing from your phone, it doesn’t even dull it a little, the little black device only echoing around the room louder.

Disoriented and groggy, you fumble for your phone on the bedside table, clumsily searching for it in the darkness. It isn’t your alarm, the usual peaceful tones of the birds chirping would be a welcomed sound, one that eases you into the day; no this was a phone call.

Finally grasping your phone, your eyes fight themselves open as you blink away any remnants of sleep, trying to find any sort of centre from your dizzy awakening. You look at the name on your phone but your vision is so blurred you can’t make it out but answer it anyway, knowing that whoever is phoning at this ungodly hour is clearly in need of your help.

“Hello?” you ask quietly, as if you don’t want to disturb the quiet of the night, unlike the person on the other end of the call.

“Uh, Y/N? It’s Jake.” His soft Australian accent drifts from your phone speaker into your ears. He sounds unsure whether he is supposed to be making the call, which to be fair, you understand because you haven’t heard from him in months, not after…

Letting out a sigh, you rub your forehead with the base of your palm tiredly, “Jake, why the fuck are you calling me at…” you pull the phone away, inspecting the time now that you’re more alert, “3.36am?” you ask with a hint of disdain. Normally, you would welcome the boy’s surprise call, after all, you did miss him. But considering he woke you up from a good dream involving you, Jeongin from Stray Kids, and a happily ever after; he wasn’t exactly your favourite person right now.

You can faintly hear some music in the background as he stays silent and you swear to yourself if this is to give him a ride home from a concert turned party, you’ll have his head.

“Listen, I hate to ask you this but can you come to Haven?”

“The nightclub? Why?” Your earlier suspicions are proving to be right, he does want a lift home. That would be an acceptable request if you guys were actively talking every day and the best of buddies but he isn’t even your friend, not really. 

You can hear him shuffling around on the other end of the line, his voice can be heard trying to calm someone down but his words are obscured as if the phone is wrested away from his mouth, leaving only disjointed fragments of speech drifting through the receiver. 

This sounds like more than just a simple ride home and it causes you to snap to attention, your senses heightened with concern. 

Jake finally brings his attention back to you, letting out a sigh of discontentment, “It’s Jay, he’s a mess and he’s calling out for you.”

Jay. Park Jongseong.

It’s been so long since anyone has dared to mention his name to you that it almost sounds like a foreign word.

Seven months ago, you and Jongseong had decided to call off your 6-year relationship, both of you reaching the understanding that it was for the best considering your battling differences and needs within the relationship.

It wasn’t easy, the furthest thing from it actually. You and him had been inseparable since high school and once you both got together in year 12, it was always you and him against the world. He was the love of your life, that once in a lifetime kind of love that only happens in fairytales. Your souls were both painted from the same brush stroke.

But he wanted a peaceful, routine life - a classic white picket fence dream. Evenings would be spent with friends, savouring white wine and casual conversations over dinner. His heart was set on imagining the echoes of your future children's laughter filling your home, family trips to the seaside, and comforting them with kisses and band-aids when they got hurt.

And you craved spontaneity, to embrace life with vigour, travelling the world together was your dream, free from the responsibilities of parenting, cherishing moments just for yourselves. You longed for random midnight trips to Tesco for birthday cake simply because you could. All you wished for was to be with him, just the two of you.

Suddenly, your brain clicks into an important detail and you hurriedly check the calendar on your phone and the date makes you slump in your bed.

Today is Jongseong’s birthday, well technically not anymore given the time, but that means he has lived his first birthday without you by his side in so long. You would always celebrate his big day by doing something from his handwritten bucket list he has had since he was a child. Over the years he has added more to the list, each birthday scoring one out to add another.

The list wasn't extravagant; it was filled with simple yet heartfelt desires. You bought him a bundle of guitar lessons and a Taylor 114e electric guitar to fulfil his wish of learning to play. When you noticed the Download Festival marked with gold stars on his list, you surprised him with tickets for the year Metallica was headlining. And when he expressed a desire to cook a meal from scratch for his mum, you gifted him a kitchen knife engraved with his name and took the time to teach him how to prepare her favourite dish.

His birthdays were the most precious when you were in them, and you weren’t there with him.

“Y/N?” Jake’s sweet voice draws you back to his attention and out of the memory lane swirl your brain has put you in. He knows this is a tough call for you to take considering you and Jongseong said to cut ties completely; it’s better to act like you both didn’t exist than keep a thread tethered to one another that would only hurt you more.

As Jake and Sunghoon whisked Jay away for his birthday celebration, their intention was simple: to help him let loose and have a good time. Jay had been buried in overtime work lately, leaving little room for socialising. Since the breakup, the idea of going out without you - dancing together, stealing kisses in the taxi ride home - seemed unappealing.

Waking up that morning, Jay realised it marked the first birthday in six years without ticking something off his bucket list. The familiar, worn paper lay dormant on his desk, a stark reminder of your absence. He had no desire to celebrate today without you by his side. If he could fast-forward through the day to escape the weight of his birthday, he would eagerly do so.

Yet, with two very persuading friends and a whole lot of whiskey later, here he was, curled up outside Haven, yearning out for you.

“Y/N please, at least come and convince him to get up and come home with us,” Jake pleads. You can hear the cries of your ex-lover more clearly now as Jake kneels beside his friend, checking in on him.

With a resigned sigh, you nod, “Okay. Keep him warm, I’ll be there in 20 minutes.”

Hanging up the phone, you quickly put a brush through your hair and change into a baggy top, one you bought for Jongseong before breaking up, and a pair of grey sweatpants. This is a bad idea, you know it is, but you also can’t leave him to wallow in the middle of the street. You don’t think you could live with yourself if you didn’t help and Jake wouldn’t call unless it was something he couldn’t handle. 

You don’t want to see the state Jongseong is in, his wailing cries that you could slightly hear over the phone already made your heart clench in hurt.

As you drive to Haven, your heart races in anticipation with each mile that passes. Is your heart ready to face him after all these months? Staring into the love of your life’s eyes once again might break you even more. You’ve done a good job in keeping yourself together, at putting on a facade that everything is okay, when deep down you know that if one person asked you about Jongseong you would crumble and fall apart. 

He wasn’t the only one throwing himself into work to forget. You’ve worked hours and hours trying to keep your mind off the heartbreak, you thought that if you just focused and kept your head down, the phrase time heals all wounds would kick in and you’d be free of the torment of losing your first love. But it hasn’t worked out that way, you know that now as you speed down the empty roads to console the one person you are trying to forget.

As you reach Haven, you can vaguely see three boys under the illuminating sign, almost as if shining a spotlight on them to add to the spectacle that Jongseong is making. Onlookers are watching as your ex-boyfriend cries on the pavement, wishing you would come home.

With a quick exhale, you step out of the car before doubts can creep in, determined to be there for him. Jake and Sunghoon's voices float to you, attempting to soothe him and inject some sense into the moment. Bracing yourself, you approach, ready to offer whatever comfort you can, despite the storm of emotions swirling within you.

Sinking onto the balls of your feet, you lower yourself to Jongseong's level, meeting his strained figure. Instantly, the sight of his distress instantly shatters your heart into a million pieces.

An abundance of tears cascades down Jongseong's reddened face, obscuring his features like a relentless waterfall. His clenched jaw and the prominent vein on his forehead portray the intensity of his distress as he struggles to draw each laboured breath. Curled into himself, his body seems to contort with the weight of physical agony, mirroring the emotional pain that ripples through his trembling form. He’s been keeping this in for so long that his body doesn’t know how to cope with it.

Reaching out to grab his clenched fist, you shuffle forward, “Jjongie? It’s me, baby, look at me,” you say calmly, trying to reassure him with your soft voice.

As your fingers gently encircle his clenched fist, Jongseong's body tenses at the touch. Slowly, he turns his gaze towards you, his eyes bloodshot and filled with an overwhelming mixture of sorrow and longing. For a moment, there's a flicker of recognition in his eyes before they cloud over again with anguish.

He doesn’t believe you’re actually here, considering the long nights where he has conjured up the idea of you, clinging to his imagination on the lonely nights he wishes for your touch. But as you squeeze his hand, he realises this isn’t a dream-induced sighting, you’re really here in front of him.

"Y/N..." he murmurs, his voice choked with emotion. Tears stream down his face in torrents, some landing on your hand that holds his. His cries reverberate through the air, each wail a sharp stab to your chest.

Cupping his cheek, you settle yourself between his legs, ignoring the discomfort of the rocks beneath your knees, your focus solely on him. With a sad smile, you attempt to mask your own anguish, your touch a gentle reassurance amidst his storm of emotions.

"Hey, hey, enough of that now," you hush him softly, your voice a soothing melody in the tumultuous night. Using your thumb, you tenderly wipe away his tears, though they continue to flow unabated.

He leans into your touch, “I miss you so much, Y/N, please. Please,” he pleads as you feel his warm breath against your skin as he nuzzles into your palm, seeking solace in the familiar sensation he's been yearning for.

It’s hurting you just seeing him like this, the man you once knew to be strong-willed and resilient, keeping his emotions under control unless he’s sharing sweet vulnerable moments with you under the covers, is now a shell of himself, stripped bare by the weight of grief.

Turning your face to look at Jake, you offer him a small smile, “I’ll take him home.”

“You sure?” Jake asks, knowing that it’s a dangerous game for you both if you do.

“Yeah, I don’t think he’s going to move unless I do,” you chuckle sympathetically but there’s a bubble in your throat as Jongseong’s whimpers flow into your ear from beside you.

Nodding, Jake gestures to Sunghoon, silently enlisting his help in the task of ferrying the drunk man to your car. The weight of Jongseong's limp form proves cumbersome as you all struggle to navigate his dead weight, his limbs hanging heavily without offering any assistance.

"Let's get you home," you murmur softly, your hands pressing gently against Jongseong's chest to steady him, aided by his friends who lift him onto their shoulders.

His eyes lock onto yours, an intensity burning within them. "Please be real," he whispers, his voice trembling with desperation. Despite feeling your touch and catching hints of your scent, doubt gnaws at him. If this is merely a figment of his imagination, he knows he'll never forgive himself. You're so close, so tangible - it has to be you.

With much struggle, the three of you get him to your car, putting him gently in the backseat so he can lie down, but he wraps his arms around your waist as his legs stay situated outside of the vehicle, holding you close to him.

"Come on, Jjongie, lie down for a minute," you coax gently, guiding him to stretch out along the seats. But he remains unmoving, clutching onto you as if fearing you'll slip away if he lets go. With a soft sigh, you stroke the back of his head, your hands moving in a soothing rhythm. "I promise, I am not going anywhere," you whisper, your words a tender vow to him.

Yet, your attempts to reassure him seem to go unheard. His face burrows deeper into your stomach, his words muffled by the fabric of your t-shirt and the weight of his tears.

You exchange a worried glance with Jake and Sunghoon, “How much did he have to drink?” you ask, scared of the answer they will give. Your ex-boyfriend has always been so good at holding his liquor that it must have been a hefty amount he consumed.

“Like two weeks' wage worth,” Sunghoon winces, his neck tightening as he looks at his best friend.

"Oh, baby..." you sigh softly, feeling a wave of empathy wash over you. Returning your attention to Jongseong, you press a tender kiss to the crown of his head, hoping to offer some comfort amidst his distress. His response is to cling to you even tighter, his sobs echoing against your chest as he seeks solace in your embrace.

You need to get him home, he’s a mess and the longer he stays like this, the more his body is going to wear out. 

With a gentle hand, you stroke his hair, your touch a soothing caress against his trembling form. Despite the chaos swirling around you, you find a semblance of peace in this intimate moment, anchored by the bond that still lingers between you.

"I've got you, Jjongie," you whisper softly, drawing back as he eases up his grip on you. His friends go to help you but you halt them with a firm gesture, "You guys can go, I've got it from here."

Sunghoon shakes his head, concern etched on his face. "He's too heavy, Y/N. You won't be able to manage him into the flat without us," he protests.

But you stand your ground. This is your and Jongseong's mess, and you can’t let others help you clean it up, "It's okay. You guys have done your shift for tonight. Go home," you insist, your voice resolute.

Reluctantly, Sunghoon and Jake nod and bid you goodnight before going their separate ways home, leaving you alone with Jongseong and the weight of your shared history.

Taking a deep breath, you hoist him in, his body listening to you a little more now that you’ve reassured him you aren’t leaving him. He sprawls over the backseats and lays still, the alcohol consuming him into some form of comatose now that he has relaxed slightly.

You slide into the driver's seat, the engine humming to life beneath you. Glancing at Jongseong's slumbering form in the rearview mirror, you steel yourself for the journey ahead.

_____

Arriving at his house makes you more nervous than before. This wasn’t just his flat, it used to be your shared home, the place you lived for 2 and half years and made countless memories in.

You were the one to move out and find your own place, thinking it was best since your work was further away and you could find an apartment closer to it. But the truth is, you just couldn’t face being reminded of him in each room and in the pieces of furnishings.

It was selfish of you to leave him with the remnants of your relationship surrounding him, all you thought about was you and your needs, neglecting to think about how he might feel being surrounded by nothing but memories.

Lugging him into the flat, his legs are working in tandem with you now unlike before but he still isn’t proving to be the easiest person to carry. The last time you had to hold his weight like this was when he got drunk at your prom after taking sneaky shots in the hotel garden with his friends. It was funny but you blame him for some of your back pain that you’ve endured in your early twenties.

As you push open the door and step into the living room, a wave of nostalgia washes over you like a tsunami. Though only seven months have passed, it feels like a lifetime since you last stood in this space with him by your side. Everything remains unchanged, frozen in time since the day you left. The same couch sits in its familiar spot, adorned with throw pillows and blankets you bought for last season. Photographs of you both, captured during Christmases and holidays, adorn the walls, each one a snapshot of happier times. Even the vase that his mum had gotten you both for your housewarming gift, one that you loved and he hated, remains in its pride of place on the mantlepiece.

You push your thoughts down and make your way to your once-shared bedroom, walking through the memories and heaving your ex-boyfriend along slowly. His nose nudges into your hair, sweeping in your scent as he loses himself in the feeling of you.

As you reach the familiar threshold, you can't help but feel a pang of bittersweet longing. This room, once a sanctuary where you both shared your laughter and bodies, now serves as a poignant reminder of the love you've lost.

Gently, you ease Jongseong onto the bed, sitting him up, “I’m going to get you some clean boxers okay?” you ask him but he’s not here, not really, so you make your way to the drawers on the other side of the room.

Walking over, you spot a familiar t-shirt lying crumpled on your old side of the bed. You make a b-line to investigate it and as you pick up the crumpled t-shirt, a flood of memories washes over you, transporting you back to simpler times. Your fingers trace the familiar fabric, still faintly carrying the scent of you, now mingled with his cologne. You piece it all together pretty quickly, the way it still smells faintly of you but is not starting to be overpowered by his cologne. He hugs it at night to find peace of mind.

“Oh, Jjongie,” you sigh, heart reaching out to him. You’re no better, you have one of his hoodies that you snuck into your luggage as you packed and wear it when you’re at home. Just like your t-shirt, his hoodie is starting to lose its scent from the amount of times you’ve hugged yourself to sleep in it.

Jongseong has always been reserved, his emotions carefully guarded behind a facade of reason and rationale. To see him like this, vulnerable and raw, strikes a chord deep within you. If he had always worn his heart on his sleeve, perhaps it would be easier to understand. But the complexity of his emotions only serves to deepen the ache in your chest.

You place the t-shirt back on the pillow before opening the dresser drawer and retrieve a clean pair of boxers, his favourite ones with the faded Hellow Kitty print that you've always teased him about.

Gently, you begin to undress him while he rambles incoherent nonsense that you can’t understand between the mix of tears and drunk slurring. The top half is easy but the bottom half proves difficult as he only looks up at you, whispering pleas as he stares at you, keeping his bum firmly sat on the edge of the bed.

As you finally manage to remove Jongseong's jeans and boxers, leaving him naked, a new layer of vulnerability settles over the room. He sits before you bathed in the soft glow of the hallway light, his silhouette outlined in the darkness.

His beauty, illuminated by the faint light, is both captivating and heartbreaking. The familiarity of his form, once etched in your memory, now lays before you in the flesh, a tangible reminder of the love you still harbour for him. How could you not still love him? He was perfect in every way possible.

"Stay with me," he whispers, his voice a gentle plea as his hands begin to roam your sides, tracing the contours of your body beneath your shirt. Each touch ignites a flurry of sensations within you, sending butterflies fluttering in your stomach.

He pulls you onto his lap, your sweatpants becoming the barrier between his cock and your pussy. Yet, none of you are really thinking about that right now, all you both want is to hold one another again.

“Jongseong, we broke up, and for good reason,” you rationalise with not only him but yourself as you find yourself sinking into his touch as his hands roam your back.

Nuzzling his nose against yours, he begins to cry softly again, his face rubbing itself against yours as his tears transfer from his cheeks to yours, “Please, baby, don’t leave me,” he mumbles as his lips ghost over yours. 

He doesn’t just mean tonight, he means forever. A tear from your eye cascades down your face, getting lost in the mixture of his, your empathy for him overwhelming you because you feel the same way he does. You need him in every way, you need to be close to him, to feel his heart beating in synch with yours once again.

But you know better than this. You’re both just prolonging heartache if you succumb to being with him again. You can’t give each other what you need.

“Baby, don’t do this,” you beg him, knowing that he has the power to pull you back into his life with the click of his fingers, that resolve you have worked so hard to build up now hangs in the balance, “Let me get you changed and then into bed, yeah?”

Reasoning with him is a lost cause, his arms now hugging you tightly like before as he ignores your suggestion. The last thing he wants is to put on those boxers because he knows when he does that you’ll leave. 

"Please, Princess," his voice is raw with emotion, his desperation palpable in the air between you. And as you look into his eyes, you see the depth of his longing mirrored in your own. 

His plea hangs in the air, a heavy weight pressing down on your already burdened heart. You feel torn between the overwhelming desire to give in to his request and the harsh reality of the situation.

With a deep breath, you summon the strength to gently extricate yourself from his embrace, feeling the weight of his disappointment lingering in the air. His hurt expression tugs at your heartstrings, but you shake your head firmly, "Just tonight, okay?" you assure him, your voice soft but resolute.

Curse you and your heart that caves into his pleas so easily.

You disregard getting him dressed and instead, remove your sweatpants and replace them with those very boxers you planned to adorn him with and swap out your t-shirt for the one on your old pillow. Jongseong clumsily climbs into his covers, getting comfortable and finding some happiness in the fact that you’ll be in his arms at least for a little while. 

Once you climb into your side of the bed, he instinctively hugs you from behind, the comfort of your body pressed against his. He spoons you, tucking his face in your neck as he exhales in contentment. This is all he has been craving since that night you left and he couldn’t be happier. All the turmoil and anguish from earlier slowly depletes as he finds himself sinking into a much-needed sleep.

You can’t deny you feel the same, his arms wrapped around you feel like home, like you’ve been on a seven-month business trip and you’re now finally back where you belong. You sink into him further, relishing his skin against yours.

“Happy birthday, Jjongie,” you whisper, bringing his hand up to kiss it before intertwining your fingers with his.

_____

Waking up, Jongseong feels like his whole body has crashed into a brick wall. His bones ache and his head feels tight, but there is a weight that feels so familiar yet foreign, his legs tangled around something and his arms holding it close. This feels different from the t-shirt of yours he clings to every night, this has more substance.

Please don’t be some random girl he thinks to himself, scared to open his eyes. 

Even if he did want to open them he couldn’t because they are being held together so tight by something. Was he crying last night? Actually, what even happened last night?

He replays the fragments of the evening in his mind, a few scattered images begin to surface - Jake and Sunghoon dragging him to Haven, the raucous atmosphere of the bar, and the ill-advised decision to ride the mechanical bull. And then nothing.

As he tries to recounter the night, you see him attempt to pry his eyes open and decide to help him out. Swiping your thumb over his eyes, you wipe away the mix of his dried-in tears and sleep. He looks so confused when you touch him and his body tenses.

Either he is having a severe case of hallucinations to the point where he is starting to physically feel you or the girl that he took home last night resembles your touch. God, how he hoped it was the first one. 

Opening his eyes with your help, he blinks away the blur and sets his eyes on your face, his expression reading one of relief that quickly turns into astonishment.

“Y/N? Baby?” he whispers, his hands instinctively reaching for your cheek, “Please be real.” The same words he pleaded out last night leave his lips again. Jongseong has spent so many nights dreaming of you, wishing in an alternative universe that he can hold you again, so much so that this doesn’t feel real.

You don’t know what to say but obviously, you have to say something. It was one thing to confront drunk Jongseong who didn’t have a wit about him but now it feels like there’s a boulder on your chest as you try to conjure up the courage to speak to a sober, semi-alert Jongseong. 

All you can do is nod, no words escaping your dried lips. You look down to see you and his limbs mangled together just like they used to be, the feeling of his body pressed so tightly against yours almost feels like heaven.

He takes in the sight of you, the lines of disbelief on his features soften, replaced by a glimmer of hope. Slowly, almost tentatively, he reaches out to you, his fingers brushing against your cheek as if to confirm your presence.

The touch sends a jolt of electricity coursing through you, he’s caressing your cheek so tenderly it reminds you of the time you had the shift from hell and Jongseong held you the whole night, whispering sweet words into your ear and stroking your tears away, just like this.

Except there are no tears this time, you’re all cried out - months of mourning the loss of your relationship will do that to you.

As Jongseong's eyes meet yours, a flicker of recognition passes through them, followed by a wave of embarrassment. His voice is soft as he speaks, a hint of uncertainty lacing his words, "What are you doing here?" he asks, his tone laden with confusion.

"You got pretty drunk last night," understatement "And Jake asked me to come pick you up."

You can feel the tension in the air as Jongseong processes your words, his expression a mixture of shame and regret, "Sorry, I don't usually drink that much," he murmurs, his voice tinged with remorse.

The explanation stings, not because Jongseong has been drinking more, but because of the distance it creates between you. It's as if he's explaining himself to a stranger, rather than to the person who once knew him better than anyone else. The past six years you’ve known how he knows his limit and that he doesn’t tend to breach it, not subconsciously. 

All you do is nod, accepting his explanation as you slowly start to detangle yourself from him, “I better get going.”

“Y/N, please let's talk,” he pleads as his voice wavers, his grip tightening around your waist, and his desperation palpable as he pleads for your attention. But you've made up your mind, and no amount of persuasion can sway you from the path you've chosen.

"Jongseong, please, let's not do this," you implore, your voice tinged with a mixture of sorrow and resolve, "We're only going to hurt ourselves again."

You both know the reasons behind your breakup are deeply rooted, immutable truths that cannot be changed. It's not a matter of cheating or petty disagreements—this is about fundamental differences in desires and aspirations for the future.

But Jongseong refuses to accept defeat, his forehead coming to rest against yours as he breathes his love out, "Princess, we can work it out, I know we can," he insists, his words heavy with sincerity.

You steel yourself against the onslaught of his love, knowing that to give in would only prolong the inevitable pain, "We want different things, Jjongie," you remind him gently, your voice tinged with regret.

“I can do without them. It’s you I can’t live without…I can’t breathe without you here by my side.” His words are sincere and you know it, but you can’t accept it. When you both discussed your future, he looked so excited at the prospect of kids that your heart broke instantly. You knew right away that you couldn’t give him what he wanted most.

Closing your eyes and sucking in the bottom of your cheeks, you steady yourself to have this conversation yet again, “You can’t give up the idea of having kids. Having the life you want is much more important than me. You can find someone who can give you that.”

It hurts to say but you need to rip the bandaid off quickly. 

“You think I want that life with anyone but you?” His voice raises lightly, hinting at the anger rising into his chest. He needs you to listen to him, to understand him, “Y/N, if it’s not with you then I don’t want that life.”

Shaking your head determinedly, you sit up, “But I can’t give you that life, it’s not what I want.” You feel like you’re reliving the argument that ended it all those months ago.

“That’s okay.”

“No, It’s not,” It’s your turn to get angry, your eyebrows lacing together as you try to read him. How can he say all of this so easily? Like he wasn’t trying to promise you that he would change his entire life plan just to be with you. Is it romantic? Sure, but it’s also fucking stupid. No one should change just to keep someone they love because if they were meant to be, then their values would align…right?

"It's not that simple, Jongseong," you argue through the silence, your voice tinged with frustration, "You can't just sweep aside your dreams for the sake of our relationship. What about what you want? What about your own happiness?"

Jongseong sits up, the covers hiding his naked lower half; he hadn’t realised he was naked and it only adds a new layer to his vulnerability. He is laying himself bare to you.

But Jongseong's gaze remains unwavering, his determination evident in the set of his jaw, "Since we broke up, I've realised that you are the life I want," he declares, his words carrying the weight of his conviction, "Whatever that looks like for you, I want it."

You feel his words like a pickaxe, slowly breaking away at the wall you’ve spent months building around your heart and reason. A whirlwind of conflicting emotions sweeps over you. On one hand, his declaration of love sparks a glimmer of hope amidst the ruins of your fractured relationship. Yet, on the other hand, doubt claws at your insides, gnawing away at any semblance of certainty, the pure love that you have for him only wishes to make sure he’s happy and gets everything he wants in life.

"Jongseong, I..." you start, your voice wavering as you grapple with the turmoil inside. How do you express the depth of your feelings?

Grabbing your face with his large hands, he kisses you, his soft lips now coating yours. You’ve missed him so much that you become overwhelmed by his actions, a soft tear leaking from your ducts.

So much for being all cried out, you think to yourself.

"It's you, Y/N, I only need you," Jongseong whispers against your lips, his urgency evident as he seeks solace in the warmth of your embrace, stealing kisses with a hunger born from longing.

In spite of yourself, you find your lips responding to his touch, drawn in by the familiar sensation of his mouth against yours. Your arms instinctively wrap around him, fingers grazing lightly over the muscles of his back as you hold him close; your brain is telling you to push him away but your heart is pulling him tighter to you. 

"It's not fair to you, Jjongie," you murmur, the words weighted with a sense of guilt and remorse.

"I'd rather be with you happily than with kids and someone else miserably," Jongseong confesses, his words carrying the weight of his heart's deepest desires.

Jongseong wishes you could see it from his point of view; of course, he has wanted kids and a comfortable life for so long but the idea of achieving that when you are not his wife seems fucking ridiculous. There is no one in this world he wants to be with other than you and if that means he has to be an uncle rather than a dad, so be it.

You are all he has ever wanted. To grow old with you, to experience each of your accomplishments together and have you close to him. He wants to protect you and look after you the way he knows he should and that is his new life goal. This isn’t a decision he has made lightly but a decision he wanted to make.

His hands glide down your sides, trailing over your thighs as his kisses continue, each touch a manifestation of the craving that has consumed him. His need for you is overwhelming, every fibre of his being yearning for you in every possible way. Another moment without you feels unbearable, as if he might die.

You surrender to his touch, sinking back onto the bed as he hovers above you, his grip on your thighs firm yet tender. The intensity of his desire leaves marks, but in this moment, you welcome anything he offers.

It's astonishing how the feel of his lips on yours dismantles your resolve, scattering your apprehensions like leaves in the wind.

Slowly, he removes from you the t-shirt that has absorbed his tears on countless nights and the boxers you borrowed from him, leaving you exposed beneath him. As he looks upon your naked figure, his eyes drink in every curve and contour, offering silent gratitude to the heavens for letting him have you like this. You are everything he wants and more.

“You’re so fucking beautiful, Y/N,” he whispers into your mouth as he presses his body hard against yours, his member rubbing itself against your folds. 

The feeling of him rubbing against you is enough to elicit a moan. No amount of toys was enough to satisfy you, not the way Jongseong could. Over the years you learned about one another’s bodies so intimately that no one could ever know you the way he does, not even yourself. 

You couldn’t bear the thought of sleeping with someone else, even if you and Jongseong had broken up, your heart couldn’t do it. You never even considered a one night stand because deep down you knew that your body belonged to Jongseong and no one else.

He moves his hips, slowly rubbing himself against you, the bell of his cock grazing your clit teasingly. It feels like a dream for him to touch you this way again, and the fact that you were coating his cock with your wetness was enough to tell him that you need this too.

Kissing you desperately, his tongue darts into your mouth and swirls with yours as he seeks to taste you, his buds dancing along with yours. He moans into your mouth and acts as an echo of his love for you.

“I missed you so much,” he whispers as his hips continue to move slowly, teasing your hole with his tip each time he draws back. It’s becoming increasingly obvious how much it’s starting to irritate you, your need to have him inside you is evident in your whines of frustration.

"I missed you too, baby. More than anything," you confess, your hand finding his cock as you press against him, seeking to create greater friction between you. With each movement, the pressure builds, sending waves of pleasure coursing through both of you.

With each synchronised movement, the tension between you mounts, the desire for one another lingering in the warm air. His hips continue their slow, teasing rhythm, each brush against your core sending sparks of want up your heat and into your chest.

Feeling the urgency building within you, you guide his cock with precision, pressing it against your eager entrance. A soft gasp escapes your lips as you feel the head of his length dip into you only slightly, the anticipation of being filled with him heightening your senses.

"Please," you whisper, your voice laden with need and longing, a plea for him to take you.

With a teasing grin, Jongseong relents to your plea, but not in the way you expected. Instead of thrusting into you the way you want him to, he trails his fingertips along the curves of your body, igniting a trail of fire in his wake. His touch is light and tantalising, tracing patterns across your skin as he savours every moment. He wants to take his time with you, no matter how much his dick longs to be surrounded by your walls.

You like to be teased even for a little bit, the payoff at the end always hits the right spot.

You squirm beneath his touch, aching for more, but he continues with deliberate slowness. His fingers dance over your heated flesh, exploring every inch of your body with an intimacy that leaves you breathless. Each caress sends shivers down your spine, building the anticipation to unbearable heights. God, you missed his hands all over you.

As his right hand dips lower, he begins tracing circles around your sensitive clit and you can't help but arch your back in pleasure, a soft moan escaping your lips. The sensation is electrifying, sending waves coursing through your body as he expertly teases you.

Feeling your body tremble with anticipation, his touch becomes more urgent as he presses his fingers against your throbbing clit h and with practised skill, he begins to move faster, applying just the right amount of pressure to have you writhing beneath him.

“You look so fucking perfect, all desperate and whiney like this, Princess,” he says as he leans down to kiss you, breathing in deeply through his nose as he tries to fill each of his senses with you. It wasn’t just enough to feel you, he wanted to taste you, to inhale your scent, to hear you cry out for him, to see you unravel beneath him.

Your breath catches in your throat as the intensity of his touch sends you spiralling towards the edge of bliss. Each stroke of his fingers drives you closer to the brink, your body humming with the need to let go.

But just as you feel yourself teetering on the edge, Jongseong suddenly slows his movements, drawing out the pleasure with agonising slowness. It's a torturous tease, the brief moments of intensity followed by long, drawn-out strokes that leave you gasping for more.

“Please, please, please, Jjongie,” you whimper in frustration, your body aching for release as Jongseong continues to play you like a symphony, alternating between fast and slow, building the tension to unbearable levels. Just when you think you can't take it anymore, he finally gives in, his fingers dipping into your heat and thrusting into you at a rough pace, your pussy soaking his digits as he coaxes out your orgasm.

“You’re clamping down on my fingers so hard, Baby, you gonna cum?” he asks arrogantly, knowing that with each curl of his finger, he is watching your body lose control and surrender to him.

Nodding quickly, you pull him down for a long, searing kiss as his thumb joins the party and flicks your clit rapidly, “Oh my god,” you moan out into his mouth through bated breaths, “I’m gonna cum, Jongseong, please can I cum?”

“You never have to ask baby,” he moves his mouth to your ear and lightly nibbles your lobe, “Cum for me, Princess,” he gently commands.

Jongseong continues to work his magic, his fingers moving with expert precision as he guides you through the throes of ecstasy. Your vision blurs and every nerve in your body hums with pleasure as you reach the pinnacle of bliss.

With a final, desperate cry, you let go, your orgasm crashing over you like a tidal wave. You arch your back and cry out his name as pleasure consumes you, your body trembling with the intensity of it all.

His fingers remain still inside you, but his thumb maintains its relentless pace, each swipe sending jolts of pleasure coursing through your body. Your hips instinctively twitch in response, your nub throbbing with sensitivity and yearning for a respite. Yet, Jongseong shows no signs of letting up, his determined flicking only intensifying.

"You like that, baby?" Jongseong's voice is hoarse with desire as he intently watches your reactions. His eyes are dark with need as he continues to work you with wild desire. 

Your senses are overwhelmed by sensations pouring through you, so you can only respond with a gasping nod. Every single nerve in your body is buzzing with ecstasy, and all you can think of is the delicious agony of his thumb against your delicate clit.

"Tell me what you want, Princess," he asks, his voice a seductive whisper in your ear, "Do you want more?"

You can only make a frantic plea, your words barely comprehensible in the middle of intense pleasure. "Yes, please, Jongseong... More..."

Jongseong's lips curl into a wicked grin as he hears your plea, his confidence growing with each breathless gasp that escapes your lips. With a teasing twinkle in his eye, he moves his fingers again, pressing them against your contracting walls, his hot breath ghosting over your ear as he speaks.

"What do you want, Y/N?" he whispers, his voice dripping with anticipation, "Tell me, and I'll give it to you."

Your mind is a haze of desire, but amidst the fog, one thought stands out clear and demanding. You need him inside you, filling you completely with his presence. With trembling hands, you reach for him, your fingers curling around his cock, guiding him to where you need him most, pushing his hand out of the way.

"I want you," you whisper, your voice trembling with need. "I want all of you, Jongseong." When you utter the words, there’s a deeper meaning to them, a meaning that Jongseong is clinging to.

The way your fingers wrap around his rock-hard member elicits a hiss from him, your touch mixed with your words only fuels him to give you everything you need. 

Jongseong lets out a guttural groan, entirely surrendering to your touch and words. His eyes darken with want as he watches you take control, and his breath quickens with anticipation as you guide him inside you. His breath coming in ragged gasps, he looks into your eyes with a mixture of desire and adoration, "God, Y/N," he murmurs, his voice rough with need, “You feel so fucking incredible. I’ve missed how you just suck me in like this.”

You look down and watch as his entire length gets lost in your heat, his cock’s head hitting deep within you. You’ve missed how he fills you up so much but you hadn’t realised just how badly until right now as he shallowly thrusts into you.

You respond with a low moan of pleasure, your nails digging into his skin as you pull him closer, urging him to go deeper. "Yes, Jongseong," you whisper, your voice laced with longing, "just like that. I need this so much, I need you."

With each thrust, he grunts in response, his movements becoming more desperate as he seeks to satisfy your every desire, "I'm yours, Y/N," he declares, his voice filled with raw emotion, "completely and utterly yours."

As he lifts your legs and closes them, gently draping them over his left shoulder, your warmth envelops his shaft, drawing him in closer. Jongseong relishes the sensation of your tightness, revelling in the snug embrace of your canal around him. And you too find delight in the pressure of his girth, relishing the way he stretches you further with every powerful thrust.

Each movement of his hips is deliberate, each one designed to bring you both closer to the edge of ecstasy. As his hands stroke your legs tenderly, contrasting with the intensity of his thrusts, you find yourself lost in the intoxicating rhythm of your bodies moving as one.

His jerks grow more intense, the pace quickening as he drives deeper into you, each stroke bringing you closer to the edge, "You feel so good," he groans, his voice filled with unrestrained passion, "so fucking perfect for me, Princess."

In response, you curve your back and meet his thrusts with equal conviction, the heat between you building to an almost euphoric level. "Jongseong," you exclaim, your voice a symphony of fulfilment, "don't stop, please don't stop."

Jongseong intensifies his efforts with a wild growl, each movement driven by a burning need to push you to the edge of satisfaction and beyond. At this moment, there is only you and him, burned by the fires of passion.

With a swift motion, your lover bends you in half, positioning your legs by your head as he quickens his already rapid pace. Lost in a whirlwind of desire, your eyes roll back and your hands instinctively grip his shoulders, your chest heaving with each forceful thrust of his cock. Your nails dig into his skin, leaving marks on his shoulder blades as you cling to him, lost in the intensity of the moment.

Feeling the sting of your nails, he grits his teeth and strains his neck, the veins in his temples pulsating as he fights the overwhelming urge to release inside you right then and there.

“Fuck, claw my back, Baby,” he growls, his voice thick with desire, “make me yours again.” With determination, he continues to pound into you, each movement bringing you closer to your shared orgasm.

After hearing Jongseong’s go-ahead, you dig into his back, dragging your nails across his skin, leaving fiery red lines in their wake, just like he wants. It burns him in the most delectable way, making his cock throb inside of you.

Your breaths combine in the air, creating an ensemble of desire as you both reach the edge. The tension between you grows with each thrust, a crescendo of want reaching its peak.

As he slams into you furiously, his voice fills the room with urgency, "You gonna cum again, Princess? You want it?" His words are a mixture of want and domination, starting a fire inside you that threatens to consume everything in its path.

With a firm nod, you meet his gaze, your eyes brimming with want. "Yes, Jongseong, please," you beg, your voice a frantic appeal for release once again.

In response, he increases his efforts, his motions growing more frenzied as he propels you both to your orgasms. And then, with a final, strong thrust, you shatter, your body convulsing from the ferocity of your release. Jongseong follows closely behind, his own climax mirroring yours as he finds release within you, “Fuck!” 

His body stills as he shoots his seed into you, the tremble of both your bodies vibrates the bed beneath you. Finding it hard to keep himself up, he falls onto you, moving his cock into you further, only drawing out a final moan from your lips.

After a couple of minutes, Jongseong rolls over, his chest heaving up and down rapidly. God, he missed the way you feel under him, he could go another ten rounds if you asked. 

But that would mean you would stay, and is that even something you want? He doesn’t want to ask, your answer being the deciding factor of whether he goes on his life with misery or happiness.

He knows he can’t force you into this relationship but he hopes he has done enough to convince you that you are all he wants.

“Please be with me again, Y/N. I can’t live without you,” he whispers into the air, not daring to look at you.

You on the other hand only want to look at him, to see if you can really try this again, “Even if it means no kids? No playdates with other parents? No family trips to Jeju?”

“Even without all that.” He does look sincere, his eyes now burning into yours with a new lease of determination.

The truth is, you’ve missed him so much that it hurts. Behind the strong facade is just a girl who misses her lover. Being without him is like being in a fire with no escape, constantly fighting your way out of a blaze while your lungs collapse. He’s the clear path to fresh air you desperately need, there is no denying it. And clearly, he thinks the same about you. 

Seeing him last night so fragile and broken engulfed you in the flames, burning you alive because you know that you feel every ounce of hurt that he is. It was a mirror to how you were feeling and you don’t think you knew how badly you needed him until that moment. You were trying to be so strong about it all, giving yourself only a short amount of time to grieve that as you looked at Jongseong last night, you know he has done the same.

You need one another to extinguish the fire.

“Jongseong, truly think about this, this isn’t me saying no to letting you go on a lads holiday, I’m denying you the opportunity to be a father,” you plead with him one last time, giving him an out to all of this as you lay it all on the table.

“Princess, I have had seven months to think about it. I am not compromising or altering my needs for you, this is a decision that I have made on my own. If I truly wanted the life I thought I did, I wouldn’t be begging you to be with me right now. I know this isn’t an easy choice but I have never been more sure about anything in my life.” 

Jongseong kisses all over your face, each one a receipt of his sincerity.

His words strike straight into your heart. He’s serious. A part of you wants to still feel guilty like you’re forcing him into this but on the other hand, he’s right. You’ve given him a multitude of opportunities to leave and find a girl who will cater to him, but he hasn’t. 

He doesn’t need to because all he needs is you and your love, to Jongseong, that is all he needs in his life.

“Okay, but if you ever change your min-”

He interjects with a kiss, one filled with so much happiness and love that it’s almost intoxicating; either that or all the booze in his system has transferred its way into your bloodstream. 

You giggle as he rolls over on top of you again, peppering loud and wet kisses all over your face and neck akin to a dog licking you from utter joy. Your hands try to fight him off playfully, your laugh growing louder as he nuzzles into your neck.

“Oh, wait!” Your lover's sudden pause catches your attention, his eyes sparkling with excitement as he swiftly rolls off the bed and rushes over to the messy pile on the chair by his dresser.

Curious, you crane your neck to see what he's up to, watching as he retrieves something from the floor.

“What is it?” you inquire, intrigued by his enthusiasm.

Turning back to you, Jongseong holds up the familiar torn sheet of paper that you recognise instantly, his smile lighting up his face. He grabs a pen from the desk and returns to your side, handing you both items.

“Tick it off,” he urges, pointing to the bottom of the page where a new addition was made yesterday morning. Despite his internal conflict about the list, he couldn't bring himself to tear it up. If he never saw you again, this would be a precious memory to hold onto.

So he added a new aspiration at the bottom.

Taking the pen from his hand, you read it slowly, “Make Y/N mine again..”

You gaze up at him in awe, understanding the significance of this gesture and how much the list means to him, “You wished for this?” you ask, to which he simply nods at your question, “Then you need to tick it off.” You push the pen and paper back to him but he stops you.

“No, you made the wish come true, so you need to tick it off,” he replies, the corners of his lips upturning slightly.

So with the pen, you draw a line over the words, scoring it off once and for all as you beam proudly, happy that both of your souls are now joined together again. You pull him in for a long, deep kiss, the bucket list discarded as you lose yourselves in the moment once again.

[lolahasmoxie]

Best Friend (E.M.)

WARNING: angst with a happy ending, friends to lovers, sexy times, disgusting fluff, Eddie being too sweet and precious for this world.

NOTES: I'm in a mood. I blame this time of year. Also, the end quote is inspired by the Simpsons. Points if you know the episode it's from.

DIVIDER BY @firefly-graphics

You're at a house party, and Eddie watches you like a hawk across the kitchen.

You're here alone; your boyfriend of two years is nowhere to be seen. You're talking with Robin and a group of girls, and even though you're smiling, Eddie can tell you're faking it. You've been faking it for a week now.

Your friends don't know, but Eddie knows. Your smile hasn't reached your eyes in a week. A trivial thing that most people would miss. But Eddie has been in love with you since you were 15; when you love someone that long, you pick up on things like that.

When you excuse yourself from the group, Eddie follows as you head out into Harrington's backyard. He sees how your shoulders sag once you think no one is around. The way you sit like the world's weight is on your shoulders as you sit in a lounger by the pool.

"What do you want, Eddie?"

Eddie smiles to himself as he takes a seat next to you.

"Should ask you that; you've been off all week."

"What do you know?"

Eddie isn't phased by your snippy remark; it's more bark than bite. He gives you a "Are you serious" look as he scoots a bit closer to you, close enough that the denim of his jeans touches your bare leg.

"You don't have to tell me. But it might make you feel better if you didn't keep it in."

Eddie watches you from his periphery as your body tenses before you let out a defeated sigh.

"He cheated on me."

The words make Eddie want to hunt your man down and pummel him until he can't feel his hands. The last time he wanted to inflict that kind of violence was the last time he saw his old man.

"He's been seeing her for almost six months, and then he said he didn't love me anymore."

"He's a fucking idiot."

"You have to say that you're my best friend."

"When have I EVER said anything that I didn't want to?"

He can see the hint of a smile on your lips as you discreetly try to wipe at your waterline.

"He's an idiot. He didn't deserve you; he never did."

"Keep talking like that, and I might think you were jealous."

Eddie's body stills, his heart dropping into his ass at your words. He had spent years lying. First, to himself over his real feelings and then to you as he tried to hide those feelings as he watched you repeatedly date the wrong guy over and over.

"Eddie."

He doesn't turn to face you when you call his name. Turning will begin a conversation he doesn't know if he's ready to have. The delicate dance he's held you in will disappear, and the possibility that he will end up alone is more than he can bear.

"How long?"

Eddie turns then, brows furrowed in question.

"How long?"

"About 10 minutes after our first conversation in freshman English."

He lets out a heavy sigh, face looking straight ahead as he still refuses to look at you.

"Why didn't you say something? You had so much time?"

"You seemed happy. That's all I ever wanted. It's all I'll ever want."

He turns his head when your hand touches his chin, letting you pull him to meet your eyes. He watches as you study him like you're seeing him for the first time.

"Tell me what you're thinking, Y/N."

"Make me forget."

Eddie gasps softly at your request.

"You don't mean that."

"You think you're the only one hiding their real feelings?"

You're both staring at each other now. Your waterline is still teary, but Eddie is pretty sure this has nothing to do with your now ex. He reaches for your hand, entwining your fingers and feeling elated when you squeeze.

"If we do this, it's going to change everything. There'll be no going back."

"I hope not."

Eddie can't help but chuckle when he sees your smile finally reach your eyes.

"I'm serious; this could ruin everything."

"Oh, Eddie,"

Eddie's breath catches when you lean in closer, your lips right against the shell of his ear.

"It could also be amazing."

Eddie lets out a shaky breath before standing. He stretches out a hand and helps you out of the lounger before he leads you out of the party through the front door. He opens the door of his van for you, leaning over you to buckle you in with a cheeky grin. Then he's behind the wheel, revving the engine as he drives to your apartment without another word.

The sun is barely coming in through your curtains when you wake. Stretching your limbs like a cat, you smile at the soreness in your thighs and between your legs. You reach an arm out and sit up when you feel empty sheets next to you.

The night comes crashing back in stages. The fumbled kisses as he crowded you into your apartment. The look in his eyes as his plush lips worshipped your pussy until you had to drag him up by his hair. The way he whimpered when he was finally buried balls deep inside you. How you had both finally collapsed after what felt like hours. Eddie sending you off to sleep with a flurry of soft declarations of his love.

And now, he wasn't here.

You feel the panic bubble when you hear footsteps coming down the hall. The smell hits you next: freshly brewed coffee. Then Eddie is softly pushing into the room, naked and holding two hot cups of coffee.

"Morning, Sweetheart. Hope I didn't wake you."

You're incapable of speaking, and Eddie stops when he sees you. He puts the mugs down and quickly climbs into bed next to you.

"What's wrong? I didn't hurt you, did I?"

You shake your head as you let him pull you close.

"You weren't here, I thought. Never mind, it's stupid."

"Don't say that. Just wanted to make my girl some coffee. I know how grumpy she gets without her caffeine fix."

"Asshole."

Eddie smiles at the remark, all bark and no bite. He hands you your mug, watching you take a small sip as he rests beside you.

"So,"

Eddie freezes at your tone. He knows that tone. It's usually the harbinger of bad news. He steels himself, waiting for you to tell him that last night was a mistake and that he needs to be on his way.

"I'm your girl now, huh?"

Eddie can't hide his smile. It stretches ear to ear as he snuggles in closer to you. His head rests on your shoulder, lips pressing to your skin as he breathes you in.

"I think you've always been my girl."

"Well, I'm glad we're on the same page now."

"Yeah, but now I have this new problem."

Eddie's smile doesn't falter as he sits up. He takes your mug and places it on your nightstand. Before you can speak, he's laying you back down on the mattress, his body moving over yours like a panther.

"I meant what I said in the van last night. What did I say was gonna happen once I stopped the van?"

You sigh as he rests his weight on you. Eddie takes your hands, bringing them above your head. He entwines your fingers, both of you giving reassuring squeezes that this is what you both want.

"You said that you were gonna hug me."

A kiss to your neck.

"You were gonna kiss me."

A brush of his lips against yours.

"And?"

You feel his cock warm and heavy against your pussy.

"You were never gonna let me go."

He kisses you as he enters you, and he has you moaning as the sun rises in the East.

[jackhues]

karma - auston matthews

notes: this is based off of @matthewshisch's idea (karma is the guy on the leafs)! so s/o to her <3 also, reader is a singer :)) AND gif not mine !

likes are good, reblogs are better!

being a celebrity meant that no matter what, one thing would always be a fixed thing in your life. and that was the rumours.

one week you were dating a new guy. the next, you were engaged to some kid from your hometown. the next week, you were back with your ex.

no matter what, the dating rumours always flew around you. maybe the fact that you never made it public with anyone fuelled those even more. whatever the case, it was funny reading them.

especially when you thought about what you had planned for tonight.

a knock sounded on your door, followed by a familiar voice, "did someone order some flowers?"

you couldn't help the smile growing on your face as you made eye contact with auston in the mirror.

you were in your dressing room at the stadium, getting ready for the opening night of your multi-month tour. you'd worked hard to get to where you were now -- one of the most successful female artists in the world.

and right there by your side, supporting you for the past year, was none other than auston matthews, your boyfriend. you'd met at a leafs game years ago, but he'd only reached out to you just over a year before. ever since then, the two of you kept your relationship under wraps for the most part, doing your best to just enjoy your time together without the media's comments.

you'd talked about going public before, but for the most part, decided to let life take it's course. of course... tonight would be a pretty big surprise.

"hi, you made it," you got up from your chair, sinking into his arms for a hug.

"i wouldn't miss this for the world," he responded, placing a kiss to the top of your head. "it's my girl's big day. first tour in almost three years. nothing's gonna stop me from being here."

you grinned stupidly to yourself, finding auston's words so comforting and sweet. even after a whole year, he managed to make you feel giddy.

"i'm really happy you're here," you whispered, pulling away. "oh! i've got a surprise for you, but i can't give it to you right now. i'll give it after, okay?"

"a surprise for me?" auston repeated. "it's your day."

"hush, i wanted to do it," you said.

another knock sounded on your door, and your assistant, jenny, poked her head in. "y/n, we've got to start in ten. let's go. auston, mark's got your seat saved. head over quick, or someone'll spot you."

"that's not a big deal," auston waved it off. "if someone spots me, they spot me. it's not the end of the world."

"well, fact remains, we need y/n right now," she said. "c'mon, you can have her back when she's done her show."

"i'll see you soon," you kissed auston, before following jenny out to your position.

you adjusted your earpiece, waiting for the lights to dim. as soon as they did, the platform you were standing on moved higher, allowing you to enter directly on stage.

the lights turned back on, and the crowd went wild.

"let the show begin," you whispered to yourself.

---

"'cause karma is the thunder," you sang, "rattling your ground. karma's on your scent like a bounty hunter. karma's gonna track you down."

the crowd waved their flashlights in the air, following you as you continued dancing to the beat of the song, singing along. getting closer and closer to the surprise you planned for auston.

"step by step from town to town," you continued. "sweet like justice, karma is a queen. karma takes all my friends to the summit..."

you paused for half a second, allowing production to ready themselves and for the crowd to pay attention to the small change.

"karma is the guy on the leafs, coming straight home to me!"

you stomped on the mark, blue sparklers going off on either side of the stage -- matching with the colour of your dress and the leafs' colours.

the crowd screamed as you continued your performance, losing their minds at the confirmation that you and auston were dating.

"cause karma is my boyfriend," you locked eyes with auston in the crowd, noticing him smiling widely to himself as people nearby recorded the interaction. winking at him, you continued your song, "karma is a god."

the crowd continued chanting throughout the song, no one truly getting over the lyric change you'd done.

you had a feeling there were gonna be rumours about this for a while.

---

tags : @woodruff-edwards , @austinbutlerscaresme ,  @svechnikovvv ,  @hockeyboysarehot , @emptyflowerpots ,  @mysticaldonkey , @lam-ila ,  @babydollmarauders , @starjoyyy  ,  @kjohnson-91 , @gavinbrindley, @hischierdevils , @jackhughesily  , @panarin10 ,  @equallyshaw ,   @power2myheart  ,  @lynnismypseudonym , @beccaiscold , @akengii , @nowandkei , @cinnamonpancakes , @mitchymainer , @lifeofpriya ,  @marshmallow-babe, @hughesx3 ,  @emsully2002  ,  @starsandhughes , @huggy-hischier73 ,  @doglady5678 , @thatoneblog , @exonct07 @hughesmedicine , @qwanelledingele , @mindless-rock , @ireadthensuetheauthors , @huggy-hischier94, @slaythehousedownboots , @diary-of-jj

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[apollyonsdarksecrets]

Knight in Cowboy boots

Joel Miller x Fem!reader

Summary: emotions and buried feelings are reviled when Joel protects you from a drunk ex boyfriend

Warnings: SMUT (Minors DNI 18+ ONLY), Friends to lovers, pre-outbreak, alcohol, fighting, swearing, blood, fingering, p in v (unprotected), cream pie, pet names, maybe one Y/n I tried not to use any because I know some people don’t like it.

Word count: It’s long boo, lmao.

A/N: Y’all tumblr has some kind of hold on me because I read one Pedro Pascal fic and now I want him to pin me to the bed and have me call him daddy 😭 #hornyonmain if you like this check out my other stories for more spicy fun 🥰

Joel Miller Master List

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

“I don’t know Sally, I just… how did I not see it? Everything was great, at least I truly thought it was…” You sigh, slumping back further into your friends couch, swirling the wine in your glass.

“I knew there was something wrong with him! He always seemed so sleazy.” Sally scoffs, crossing a long leg over the other, shaking her dirty blond hair.

“Your husband is the one that set me up with Michael.” You retort, propping your chin on your hand with a sigh, you stare out the window, the party in the house was at its peak, people from around the neighborhood mingling, laughing, and sharing a good time as you and your life long best friend discuss your most recent disaster at dating.

“I never said he was a smart man.” You snort, shaking your head when movement outside catches your attention. Your eyes widen slightly, spine straightening as you catch sight of your older neighbor walking towards the house. His hands are shoved into his pockets, head tilted down slightly as he walks. He only peaks up when he reaches the walk way, face illuminated in the moonlight.

Joel Miller. The man you’ve not so secretly pinned for since moving to this neighborhood two years ago.

Your head whips around to Sally, “You didn’t tell me Joel was coming!” You gape at your friend who just shrugs a thin shoulder, taking a sip of her drink with a mischievous smirk tugging at her lips.

“I didn’t?”

Of course Joel would be invited, he’s known Sally and Tim since they moved here and had become fast friends with the couple. You begin to fidget with your outfit, regretting wearing something so basic as you tug your top down slightly, displaying more of your assets. Sally snorts beside you. “To much?”

Before she can answer her husbands loud laugh fills the air followed by the clinking of beer bottles and other guests raised voices in greetings. You turn just as the two men walk through the living room’s archway and smile brightly when Joel’s chocolate eyes land on yours. “Hey there.”

“Hey there yourself, haven’t seen you around in a hot minute darlin’.” His draw makes something inside you tick, cheeks tinting pink as the two men sit in the arm chairs opposite of you and Sally.

“You know me, hard work no play.” Joel laughs at that, tilting his beer to his lips and you force your gaze to your glass, trying and failing to not look like you were checking him out as he stretches his long denim clad legs out in front of him.

“How’s Sarah?” Sally asks, giving you time to collect yourself, the sight of the man almost always turning you into a fumbling school girl.

“She’s good, over at a friends house right now.”

“Oh so it’s just you tonight?”

“Just me.” Joel doesn’t look to Sally when he answers, eyes trained on your flushed face drinking you in.

You all spend the next hour talking about work, life, family, all the minor things in between. It’s great, you’ve missed your friends, work prioritizing most of your free time more often than not, that you never have time for simple things like this.

“I’m going to pour myself another glass, does anyone need anything?” You ask as you stand, a simultaneous no resonates from the group, Joel smiling at you with a tilt to his head that makes your knees weak.

You find the kitchen deserted, everyone either out back enjoying the table top fire or have already left for the evening. You’re humming a tune to yourself, picking through the numerous bottles for something that looks good when an arm snakes around your waist.

Nearly jumping out of your skin you push the offending appendage away and spin around, coming face to face with your now ex-boyfriend Michael.

He definitely wasn’t invited.

“What the hell are you doing here?” You hiss, stepping away only to collide with the counter top.

Michael laughs like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. His normally styled blond hair is tussled, blue eyes glazed over as he leers down at you. “Um, partying?” HIs words are slurred and he stinks of alcohol, your nose scrunching at the pungent smell.

“This isn’t that kind of party, and I don’t believe anyone invited you.” You glare up at him, nearly a foot of distance makes him taller and easier for him to crowed into your space when he takes a wobbly step closer.

“A party is always an invite. You know that sugartits.” The nickname makes you cringe, the feeling of being trapped between a drunk and a hard spot making you antsy. You and Michael dated for just under a year, everything was fine, fun, romantic even until his secret habit of getting too drunk and sticking his dick into anything with a nice set of tits came to light.

“You’re drunk, how the hell did you even get here? No no i don’t want to know, just get away from me and go home.” You move to push past him, anger and resentment bubbling in your guts, but the man in front of you has another idea.

“Who the fuck do you think you are talking to me like that?” Michael grabs your wrist, twisting until you yelp in pain. “You’d think after being with me for so long, you’d learn a little bit of respect, woman.” He shoves you into the counter, your side hitting the granite so hard you lose your breath. “Do I need to teach you a lesson?”

Fear takes root deep in your chest, freezing you to the spot as Michael's hand raises above his head, ready to strike you when a booming voice fills your ears, stopping him in his tracks.

"HEY!"

Michael's head whirls around, his grip lessoning, to find Joel and Tim standing in the doorway, Sally peeking from behind their shoulders.

“Back off man, we are having a private conversation.” Michael spits, teetering on his feet. Everything is tense and silent for a second, Joel’s eyes lock with yours, fear so clearly written across your face, and that’s all he needs.

The older man storms forward, arm back, and swings for Michael’s face, a direct hit that sends your ex stumbling backwards, freeing you as he covers his bleeding nose. You run to Sally’s open arms, and Joel doesn’t stop swinging, barely giving Michale time to react before he’s on the floor.

You’re crying, yelling for Joel to stop as Tim and another man rush forward, struggling to separate the two as a crowd forms at the patio door. By the time Joel is hauled away, the man lays limp on the ground, groaning unintelligibly. Joel's face is red, chest heaving, staring at Michael below him, shaking off the two men holding him.

“I see you around her again and it will be the last fucking thing you do.” Joel’s voice is haunting, sending shivers down your spine.

You push away from Sally, grabbing onto Joel's shirt with shaky fingers. He turns to you, the look of hatred melting into concern. "Are you okay?"

"Am- Am I okay?" You ask incredulously, eyebrows pinched.

“I think y’all should go, I’ll get him out of here just…” Tim is rightfully upset, hands in his hair as he stares down at his friend, blood splattered across the white tile of the kitchen, and the rest of the guests are visibly tense.

“I’m sorry Tim… it had to be done.”

Tim sighs, nodding but says nothing more. Joel nods back, flexing his hand by his side, before taking your arm turning you towards the door.

“Come on, I’ll walk you home.”

*~*~*~*~*~*

“Is… Is your hand okay?” It’s the third time you’ve asked since getting to your house, this time peeking around the bathroom door with a cup of coffee for him. Joel insisted on cleaning himself up instead of your request to take him to the ER, when you saw how bloody and bruised his knuckles were.

“I’m sure darlin’. Don’t fret over me.” He holds up his hand, still bruising but no longer bleeding, wagging his fingers, showing you he’s alright, before wrapping some gauze and tape around it. You lean into the door frame, staring at the steam drifting up in front of you.

“I… I can’t thank you enough for what you did, Joel… I don’t know how I can repay you.” You feel meek and miserable for what happened, that anyone would get into a fight over you. You keep thinking about how you should of prevented it, instead of letting it go that far. “I’m so sorry it got to that point, I should have done something.”

Joel leans in beside you, brushing his fingers against your shoulder, gaining your attention. You glance up, caught off guard by how close he suddenly is, eyes warm and inviting like the heat radiating off of his body, this close you can see the gray streaks starting to pepper his hair and the lines of crow's feet by his eyes. “Don’t talk like you caused any of this. I’d do it again if it meant keeping you safe.”

Your heart flutters, a small smile twitching your lips as you dip your head again. “What a knight in shinning cowboy boots you are.” Teasingly, you poke his chest, unable to bring yourself to meet his gaze. Joel just smiles, taking the cup from your hands and turning to set it on the bathroom counter.

“I thought knights usually get a kiss for saving the damsel in distress.” His hand cups your cheek fully, tilting your head back up until you're forced to meet his eyes, his words sinking into your body, popping off your nerves like fire, setting you ablaze.

“That only happens in fairytales.” You breathe, relaxing into the stroke of his thumb along the apple of your cheek, watching his eyes dance back and forth between your own. Joel leans farther in, noses a hair width apart.

"How’s this for a fairytale?" His whispers all since of thought lost as he press forward, brushing your lips against his in the most tentative kiss that you barely registers it. You smile though inviting and wanting, and his hand slips to the back of your head drawing you deep.

Your eyelids droop, hands coming to rest on his chest, leaning in closer as heat coils low in your stomach, arousal swimming through your blood making you groggy and tipsy. His lips mold to your own perfectly, maybe a little chapped, the stubble of his beard bristling at your skin causing you to whimper. Joel pulls you further into the bathroom, leaning back into the counter bodies flushed as your hands slip to his neck, holding yourself to him.

In this moment it’s just you and him, the party is forgotten, the fight, the fear, the fucking blister on your ankle from walking two blocks in heels, is all forgotten. Joel doesn’t even care when he grips your waist with his injured hand, the gauze pulling tight across the cuts, scratching his palm, irritating and relentless but far out of his mind.

The kiss slowly turns more desperate, your fingers tangling into the hairs at the back of his head, his hips pressing against your own, and when he pulls away for air you’re kissing his jaw, his cheek, his neck, having waited two years you weren’t passing up the opportunity now.

Joel groans softly, eyes pinched, need shooting through his body with every open mouth kiss you place. He wraps his fingers in your hair, tugging your head back gently earning a whimper of disappointment. You look up at him, eyes glazed over, arousal humming through your body so fiercely you think you might cry.

“Let me take you to bed, I ain’t waited this long to fuck you in a bathroom.” Your breath catches on a moan, a glimmer of defiance shooting through you as you eye him up and down. You can never make it easy for yourself.

“The bathroom is where most house hold accident happen.” You snip back, beaming as he rolls his eyes, the corner of his mouth lifting in a suppressed smile.

“Why did I punch a guy for you again?” Your bark of laughter sends him over and he’s walking you out of the bathroom into the hall. “Bedroom.” You point over his shoulder and he’s lifting you off of your feet, wrapping your legs around his middle.

“B-because you were protecting my dignity?” You giggle, grabbing his face and peppering kisses across his lips and cheeks. You don’t think you’ve ever seen Joel smile this much, your heart feeling like it might burst just from the sight.

“Dignity… right.” He stops at the foot of your bed with a cheeky look that makes you raise an eyebrow.

“What are you thinking?”

His response is hoisting you higher before dropping you, unceremoniously onto the bed with a loud screech. “Joel!” You’re laughing, trying to scold him and failing miserably.

Joel climbs onto the bed above you, fitting himself between your legs and caging you, forearms resting on the mattress by your head. Your laughter sticks in your throat, heart rate picking up as the reality of situation settles over the two of you. “I can always take you to dinner first.” He jokes, hoping secretly that isn’t what you’d want.

“If you make me wait one more day Joel Miller I swear I will have a conniption.” You mock threaten wagging a finger in his face. He smiles, taking your hand and kissing your wrist gently.

“I’ll give you what you want baby.” His teeth nip your skin, staling your breath making your thighs squeeze his. “Yeah, I’ll give you what you want.” He breaths against your skin, goosebumps lifting the hairs on your arms.

You whimper slightly, breathy and thin, hooded eyes watching as he kisses up your arm and to your neck, forcing your head back so he has more room. He bites gently at your sweet spot, gauging how you react, which movement, kiss, or bite draws the most noise from your lips.

“Joel… mmmm…” Your hands slip under his shirt nails leaving a trail of red up his back that has his hips bucking slightly, groaning into your ear.

“Gonna be the death of me pretty girl, ya know that?” He asks, voice laced with arousal, leaning back to look at you under thick lashes as he bucks his hips against yours.

All you can do it whimper in response, bringing your lips to his and kissing him messily, all teeth, and spit like you both are horny teenagers all over again. Joel’s tongue slips into your mouth, taking dominance over your own and it makes you let out a noise that will be seared into Joel’s brain for the rest of his life.

He breaks away suddenly, ripping his shirt over his head and you’re following suit, shimming out of the tight material letting it fall to the floor as your hands find the expanse of his chest. He has defined muscles, years of manual labor under his skin that makes your mouth water, his body just a little softer with age but an underlying strength you’ve already witnessed twice tonight. The man is gorgeous.

“Need you Joel… please I need you.” You beg, trailing your hands down to his jeans tugging at the rough material, earning a chuckle.

“We’ve got all night, darlin. No need to rush.” He scolds mockingly, his own fingers working at the button of your skirt, yanking it over your ass and down your legs. He stops to take you in, hands pressing your hips down, thumbs brushing over the elastic of your simple black cotton panties. “Fuck… you’re beautiful.”

And you’re spinning in drunken bliss from those two words, Joel Miller thinks you are beautiful.

“Up.” He commands and who are you to say no? Your panties join the pile, bra following shortly after, until you are laid out, bare and vulnerable before him.

And Joel takes his time, thorough with his exploration, caressing your body with burning hands. His palms cup your breasts, tweaking your nipple gently, watching your reaction for what feels the best before moving on. Hands smooth down the valley of your soft stomach, kneading your flesh, making you shiver and squirm.

“Don’t go running away from me now.” He whispers, cupping your ass and dragging you closer, legs spread wide over his hips. You keen, the apex of your desire pulsing from being manhandled to where he wants you, and Joel notices with a dark smirk.

His hands slip down the inside of your thighs and you hold your breath, desperate to feel him touch you where you want him the most. And when he does, callused thumb swiping through your soaked lips, your back bows, eyes closing as a near pornographic moan flys from your mouth.

“J-Joel…” you gasp, his thumb circling your clit before dipping back down pressing into your opening. “Ah… please… please…” Bucking your hips you search for more friction, whining into the air head pressing into the mattress.

“Such manners.” You whimper louder as the muscles in your stomach tighten, catching your lip between your teeth. “Does that mean you’re gonna be a good girl for me? Do as I say?”

“Yes… yes, I’ll be good, Joel.” You whine, warm embarrassment filling your belly, hands curling into the blankets below you. Joel smiles watching your hips twitch as he swipes his thumb back up circling your clit again before sinking a thick finger into your heat, your slick walls clamping around him. The moan you let out goes straight to his cock, making it twitch and push against the confines of his jeans.

“Yeah… I know you will be.” He whispers, adding another finger, pumping into you slowly, curling his fingers searching for that mark that will have you melting underneath him. “So tight baby, have to stretch you out if you wanna take my cock.” He presses his hand down on your stomach, trapping you as his thumb rubs circles into your clit, his fingers working faster and you mewl and cry his name, punctuated with a few ‘yess’ and ‘please’

Joel hits a spot deep inside your gummy walls that’s leaving you breathless, pussy starting to spasm as he draws you towards your orgasm faster than you’ve ever experienced before. He keeps that same pace, flexing his fingers, hurtling you towards the peak of your orgasm.

“Don’t stop! Please don’t stop!” You beg, eyes shut tight, knuckles white, body flushing with white heat, making your jaw go slack, thighs shaking uncontrollably as you teeter on the edge.

He leans over you, warm breath against your lips, thumb working your clit harder. “Cum for me darlin, soak my fingers. Take what you want.”

And your body obeys, the band snapping in your stomach making you cry his name. He keeps his steady pace, marveling at the pink straining your checks and chest, the clench of your cunt around his fingers, and the way you say his name like a prayer. Joel is completely wrapped.

“Good girl, that’s right baby.” He whispers, coaxing you through your orgasm only relenting when you whimper wiggling your hips to try and get away. He brings his fingers to his lips, sucking your release from his skin with a groan. “You taste so much better than I ever imagined.”

You’re only able to whine a soft response, languid and docile below him. It’s only when you hear his zipper do you open your eyes. “There she is.” He’s kicking off his pants and boxers, your eyes drop to his cock stiff and angry red, your mouth flooding with spit, lifting your head to take in the view before you. He’s big, big and thick with a bed of black hair at the base, a bead of precum already leaking out of his tip and you’re stomach tightens in delight.

“You’re handsome.” Your voice is hoarse laced with ecstasy and foreign to your own ears.

His eyes widen slightly before he smiles, tan skin blushing. You reach for him then, hands slipping behind his neck and dragging him down into a deep kiss, stealing his breath and groaning at the taste of him and yourself mixed together.

Joel’s arm slips under your shoulders, his bandages hand cradling the back your head as his hips rut into your own. You gasp against his lips, the tip of his cock nudging your sensitive clit, your warm release coating him making him groan. “D’ya… do I need to grab somethin’?” He mutters, pressing his forehead to yours.

“I-if you wanna, I’m … I’m on the pill though and I’m clean.”

“Fucking Christ.”

Joel angles his hips, the head of his cock slipping to your entrance and nudging forward. You lift your legs, wrapping them around his hips, nails digging into his shoulders as he pushes forward, sinking into you with one slow thrust that has you breathless and reeling at the feeling of being so stretched, so fucking full.

“O-oh God Joel.” You breath, clinging to him. Joel groans, pulling out slowly before thrusting back in, the friction and pull overwhelming and yet not enough. “Please… Please Joel.” You’re begging, you want to wake up tomorrow and know exactly who made you feel so good with each step and wince.

Joel just groans, picking up on the rut of your hips and presses down closer, his weight welcoming and restricting all at one. “Hold on to me.” With that he sets a deep, hard rhythm, the head of his cock bruising your cervix with the snap of his hips against your thighs. Your bed creaking with the force he uses to drive himself into you with, your name spilling from his lips.

“Fuck… So good baby, feel so good around my cock.” Joel moans, burying his face in the junction of your neck. He bites at your shoulder, marking the skin making you whine into the air, your breath being punched from your lungs. You can already feel your next orgasm building up inside you, muscles clamping down on his cock making him groan and stutter in his pace.

“So-so good, d-don’t want you to stop.” You’ve been broken down to a pleading mess, your slick coating not only his cock but dripping down onto his balls, and pooling on to the sheets below you. Your nails are biting his skin, leaving crescent idents on his neck and shoulders that he will proudly wear when they bruise over. “M… I’m gonna cum, I’m gonna cum!”

“I’ve got you, I’ve got you pretty girl.” He grunts into your ear, his hands moving down between your bodies to find your clit, pressing tight circles into the bundle of nerves that has you withering below him, heels digging into his ass. Your lips are in that perfect O shape, eyebrows pinched and breathy moans filling your room. Joel sits back, slipping his arm to your lower back and holding you tight as he pounds into you, your hands gripping his arms for any form of leverage.

You scream his name, the sound bouncing off the walls as your orgasm rips through you, seizing ahold of your muscles and washing over your brain making you go blank and stiff in Joel’s hold. your pussy squeezing and milking his cock just right pulling his own orgasm from him with a low growl. He stills, hips twitching as he spills inside you, milky release filling you, warming you and spilling around his cock mixing with your own release.

“Fuck… shit…” Joel’s panting, eyes closed and head tilted back. “Oh baby… you’re gonna fuckin kill me.”

You pant out a small giggle, coming down from your high, thighs still twitching lightly as your brain slowly comes back to you. Joel pulls out gently, a small his through his teeth as he falls onto the bed beside you trying to catch his breath. Cracking open your eyes you stair at your ceiling for a moment, you reach across your sheets, fingers brushing against his.

Joel laces his fingers through yours, bringing the back of your hand to his lips, kissing gently. “That… that was…”

“Amazing.” You chuckle, curling into his side content and tired, body relaxing into his as sleep clouds your mind. Joel hums in agreement, the steadiness of your breathing lulling him to into his own dreamless sleep.

The end

[rans-baby]

when they think you're going on a date with someone else

a/n: I NEED A REVIVAL OF THE HAIKYUU FANDOM PLS. I NEED HAIKYUU MOOTS TO HELP W THIS BRAINROT.

tw // jealousy, possessiveness, nsfw-ish (no explicit scenes), fwb to lovers, childhood friends to lovers, exes to lovers, mutual pining

part 2 (iwaizumi, kunimi)

ATSUMU

classic fwb to lovers

you and atsumu have been messing around for about a year now, and in the beginning, neither of you wanted anything serious

but over time, you learned each others quirks and habits

he would make you coffee when you woke up and you'd make breakfast and with a chaste kiss to the cheek, you would start your days

you would spend most of your day after work in his apartment just hanging out, watching movies, making dinner, playing board games really anything to spend more time with each other

totally normal fwb behavior!

but one day he noticed that you were a little more dressed up than usual and he couldn't help but ask

"why're you all dolled up tonight sweetheart?" "oh a co-worker asked me out!"

he had never really considered the status of your relationship, but something about you going out with another man rubbed him the wrong way but he couldn't quite put his finger on what it was

you were on your way out when you thought he was going in for his usual kiss on the cheek

what you weren't expecting was him to go for your neck, leaving a trail of hickies that had you gripping his shirt and when he looked down your dress, he caught a glimpse of his favorite lingerie set, his

"wouldn't want someone to get the wrong idea, you're mine sweetheart, don't you ever forget that"

you could hear the silent desperation in his voice despite his arrogant facade

needless to say you didn't go anywhere that night

what he didn't know was that you had no intention of going on this non-existent date in the first place but what he didn't know couldn't hurt him

RINTARO

childhood friends to lovers! (personally my favorite trope)

you'd known rin since elementary school, somehow making it all the way to college together

you were inseparable and everyone around you thought you were together

with all the people both of you had rejected in the two decades of being friends, everyone had backed off of both of you after a while

lately you were busy with school and rin was also getting busy with his plans on going pro

over the past six months, you guys hadn't really spend that much time together and while you had missed spending time together you both knew there would always be time in the future for each other

or so you thought

because you had spent so much time apart, people thought that the both of you had become fair game

up until that point, you had both chalked up your lack of love lives to general disinterest in romance

but after you had saw rin at a cafe, your favorite cafe, on a date with his new manager, you came to the realization that you were in love with your best friend

but you thought it was too late, so you had entirely ceased contact with him which hurt him but he wanted to respect your boundaries so he let you be

what he didn't expect was to see you three months later during his practice but before he could reach you, he saw you waving past him, right at one of his teammates

he watched as the man jogged up to you, pulling you into a hug and talking with you animatedly

he was usually a pretty chill guy, but in that moment something lit in his chest that he had never felt before

was that jealousy? he knew he had no right to be jealous, seeing as how he'd gone on his fair share of dates in the past few months but no one caught his interest long enough to last anyways so it wasn't the same as what you were doing to him now

before you realized it, you felt someone loop their arms around your waist from behind

"hey princess, been a while. who's this?" "y/n you never told me this was the infamous rin!"

there was a petty satisfaction in knowing that you had talked about him to other men, especially to men that you were seemingly dating

"rin, this is my cousin, haven't you met before?"

he had a vague memory of meeting someone similar in appearance during high school at your 18th birthday party, but he was too enraptured on how you looked that night to really care about all the people you were introducing him to

his cheeks immediately took on a dark pink hue and he released you with a nervous chuckle

"oh hahah yeah, of course I remember I'm just.. not wearing my glasses today!" "rin, you don't wear glasses"

needless to say you still teased him about that incident to this day, your daughter finding it especially amusing that her stoic father could get flustered so easily, but only for his wife

KIYOOMI

exes to lovers, my second favorite trope!

you and kiyoomi had dated during high school, but neither of you were really ready for what being in a full blown committed relationship meant

kiyoomi had a relatively hard time expressing himself and while you tried your best to encourage him to be more open with his feelings, he genuinely couldn't and so after graduation you had broken up

once you parted ways, he realized his mistake but didn't want to disrupt the life that you were planning on building for yourself, one that he thought would be radically different than the life of a pro athlete

a few years passed and while he occasionally thought of you, it hurt less over time and eventually he had gotten over you

until he saw you with his team one day, well he had heard about you first

"have you guys seen our new athletic trainer? she's so fine, wanna bet who could get with her first?"

he was never one to entertain silly games like that, so he brushed off atsumu's words not really thinking about it

he watched in slow motion as you walked in, waving at atsumu first before turning your head and making eye contact with him before waving at him too, albeit a little less enthusiastically and that hurt him just a little

atsumu sprinted up to you, overhearing him talk about the guy that he saw you with the night before and whining about how you wouldn't give him a chance

"'tsumu he was just a friend, pinky promise!"

he couldn't control himself as he marched straight up to you, grabbing your wrist and dragging you across the gym

"well hello to you too kiyoomi, nice to see you after five years, how are you doing?"

he ignored the sarcasm

"hi y/n, nice to see you after five years too, how are you doing? who's this new guy you're with?"

to say you were surprised was an understatement, his mocking tone catching you off guard

"why do you care? he really was just a friend"

he still wasn't buying it, but after looking into your eyes after five years he couldn't help but spill out all the words that he's wanted to tell you since you had broken up

"and can you please call me omi again?"

his meek tone threw you off, but you would be lying if you didn't say that you were overjoyed at the prospect of finally being able to make things work

"omi, the guy I was meeting with the other night was komori. he needed help planning his proposal so we went out to dinner together. and by the way, I know you didn't ask but yes, I would love to hang out with you after practice"

after all these years you could still read his mind and that thought made his heart flutter in a way that it hadn't since high school

"promise I'll treat you right this time around baby, you aren't going anywhere"

[desswright29]

The Great Antipode

Pairing: Ex/Queen Shuri X Ex/Singer Reader

Word Count: A short Novel lol

Summary: Five years ago, you left Shuri on her knees in her hotel room. On the night of your wedding. The two of you moved forward with your lives both accomplishing great things. Will a celebration thrown for your latest accomplish bring the two of you back together?

Contains: Fluff, Angst, Smut, Domestic violence, slow burn, deprived Shuri

A/n: Ok y’all. Snuggle up for this one. It’s long af! But It has something for ALLL THE GIRLY’s. The romance girls, the angst girls, the smut girls, the slow burn girls, the music girls. And “Good bones” is an original poem. So I hope you all snuggle up and rub your feet together and dive in. Enjoy! Happy B-lated Valentines.

Good Bones by Shuri Udaku Who knew that the death of us could be so endearing? Laid to rest, the flesh of fearing Decaying beneath the thumb of time The stars in your eyes and my heart align

Weakness shriveled, and fell off the shape Kindred spirits take place in love’s nape A funeral began, to which we did not attend But tears fell through the soil, and growing begins

Time stood still and said “not yet” A reach in the night, yet our hands never met But I felt you, Sthandwa… I was never alone No strength in old vessels, but our love has good bones.

Walking along the foggy dock; the long coat of her tuxedo whisked gracefully in the windy night. Her vision was engrossed with the horizon of the navy sky, almost hypnotized by the green light that blinked at the top of the building in the city. The owner of the home that was a direct antipode to her own ran marathons through her mind. Though she couldn’t fully visualize it, she knew it was there. A perfect vertical axis from her home, to the home of her heart. She’d built it that way. Coming up on the end of the dock her stride  came to a halt. Her eyes shut, with the green light still invading her sight behind the lids of her eyes. She stretched out her arm,reaching for the light. For the love she’d lost five years ago. She reached for a sign. Even just a light wind to tickle the tips of her fingers. Any sign that maybe, just maybe she was thinking of her too.

“Ikumkani wam” Griot spoke through the Queens Kimoyo earrings. “Wakanda is calling.”

With a light sigh, her hand fell to her side, jaw flenching in frustration. She opened her eyes, staring right back out into the darkness that surrounded the relentless blinking green light. The darkness she deserved after the hurt she’d caused the only woman she’d ever truly loved. She turned on her heels, begining the walk back to what had become her second home. Turning her back on the darkness, and also the flashing hope of the green light.

“Bast. Hear my cry. I have done the work. If you see fit, please send my heart back to me.”

Across the axis the direct antipode to the home the Queen had built, was a JamesEdition penthouse filled with busy bodies, and buzzing conversations as everyone prepared for the big day! The fuss was partially interupted by the ringing of the doorbell. The door opened to reveal Mr. Bruno Mars. The best friend to the lady of the house. Greeted at the door by the butler, and led through the elegant grand hallway to the study. Where he was met by Mr. Michael Addai. His best friends husband. Michael quickly took the phone from his ear ending the call immediately to properly greet Bruno.

“Bruno! What’s up my brother!” He spoke with a loud booming voice, his walk just as boisterous. He stuck out his hand for Bruno to grab. 

“How’s it going man?” Bruno replies.

“Everything is everything man. That woman of mine has been talking about seeing you non-stop all week!” Bruno smiles affectionately.

“Well I should get to her then. I’m excited to see her too. I’ve missed her.” Mike smiles, wrapping an arm around Bruno’s neck.

“Inseparable the two of you. It’s quite cute!” He laughed big and loud, as the two of them entered busy living room.

The house was alive with music and bodies. It almost seemed as if it were a dance. Hair stylist, makeup artist, and wardrobe, moved gracefully around the large room. Their only mission being to perfect the beauty that sat in the center of the room. 

A luxurious silky white robe tied neatly around your waist, hung from your shoulders so elegantly. You sat leaned slightly forward, legs crossed as the makeup artist applied the last bit of gloss to your plump bottom lip.

“Well I’ll be damned! It seems as though you’ve made it my friend.” A light gasp leaves your lips. Your head turns and your eyes glimmer as they connect with your longtime bestfriend. 

“Is that you my love!?” You stood, rushing over to him with your delicately heeled feet. Arms raised prepared to be wrapped around your favorite person. You close your eyes as the two of you connect finding comfort in the warm embrace. 

“Did you miss me?” You say pulling away staring into his smiling eyes. “Everyday! Everyday I sat by my window in Rome and gazed into the nights sky missing my only friend!” He says, full of drama like only he could. You giggle pushing his shoulder, turning to take your seat back in the center of the room so that your hair could be finished.

“You’re lying. But I’m still flattered.” Bruno laughed along with you. 

“Not about the important part.” The two of you share another glance with mutual adoration.

“Bruno!” Your sister Danielle yelled as she trotted down the stairs to embrace him. “It’s been a while! I see your work in my travels often! Beautiful! Incredible!”

“Thank you Dani. I’m very flattered.” He says with a blush. 

“Yes! They are which reminds me I’m hoping to commission an original piece from you.” You chime in somewhere beneath all of the commotion. 

“I’d be honored. Especially, from a soon to be Grammy winner. Ten nominations is unfathomable!” You giggle and do a little jig.

“It still feels like a fever dream. I’m taking it moment by moment.” Someone began to fan you. Keeping you from overheating in all the commotion. 

“So Bruno, are you back in New York for good?” Michael asks, walking over to the mini bar to pour two glasses of scotch. 

“For awhile atleast, I’ll be settling. Just bought a new place over in New Rochelle. It’s nice though humble compared to the estate next door.”

“New Rochelle? Interesting. There’s an after party out there tonight. It’s being given by someone who calls themselves Sweet Lady. Have you heard of her? Anyway, I was planning for us to go there after sissy came home with the win!” Dani exclaimed, sitting elegantly on the couch in her flowing sundress. 

“Can’t say that I’ve heard of her, but I’m down to go.” Bruno replied, as Michael hands him his scotch and he nods in appreciation.

Your heart dropped to your stomach. “Sweet lady?” You say. “Sweet lady.” You say again in a whisper to yourself. Confusion crept up on your brow as the image of her sculpted face creeped into your mind. Within a blink she was again gone. 

“Y/n are you ok?” Bruno asks, bringing you out of your thoughts.

“Hm? Oh yes. I’m fine. Today is just overwhelming in this best possible way! Let’s just get through the show first and we can discuss the parties later. They’ll be plenty!”

You say, joy prevalent in your voice. But, in the back of your mind that name continued to echo.

 Sweet Lady.

Slouched in her seat, leaning slightly to the left with her elbow resting on the arm of the chair, her thumb rested underneath her chin, and her pointer finger sat thoughtfully over her lips. Shuri sat sectioned off, secluded from the masses in an area of the building that was drapped in golden curtains and flooded with security. 

Nakia and Okoye sat beside her watching the stage with expectancy. Shuri’s fingers tapped along the table before she nervously reached forward, grabbing her drink, and taking a stressed sip. She was fixated, focused in on the screen as Victoria Monet sashayed onto the stage to present the last award you had been nominated for. Album of the year. Her heart pounded against her chest, and her palms were sweaty as photos of you and the other nominees flipped onto the screen. So far, you’d cleared eight of the ten Grammy’s you were nominated for and Shuri’s heart swelled with pride.

Victoria opened the envelope, and Shuri sat forward. Her elbows sat steady on the table holding up prayer hands. Underneath the table, her knee bounced uncontrollably. It seemed the world was moving in slow motion as Victoria’s eyes lit up looking up from the envelope. 

“Oh My God!! Everybody stand to your feet right now! Give it up for my girl as she comes up to except her 9th Grammy of the night!! Making history and surpassing Michael Jackson’s record of eight in one night. Mrs. Y/n Y/l/n-Addai!!!!”

The other nominees photo’s disappear, and Shuri’s hands flew to her mouth as she jumped to her feet. Pumping her fist in the air. “Holy Shit! She’s done it! She did it! That’s my girl!”

Her eyes welled, as she looked to Nakia who stood to the left of her, grinning, clapping, and hooting like a proud big sister. “Yeeeesss!!” Okoye stood stoic a hint of a smile on her face and proud eyes. 

The camera landed on you, standing stuck at your seat, tears streaming down your beautifully made up face. Your hands covered your mouth, identical to Shuri’s. Your mom scooped you up inside her arms holding you, rocking side to side whispering her pride in your ear. 

Your sister jumped up and down, her own tears falling before she joined in with you and your mother. Your husband waited patiently, smiling down at you taking your hand and the two of you share a loving kiss. The crowd was roaring, giving you a well deserved standing ovation. 

Suddenly, a longing took over Shuri’s body. The lump in her throat getting larger, and the direction of her tears changing. Shuri’s eyes zero’d in on his hand, resting delicately on your waist as you gracefully saunter up the steps to the stage to receive your award. That should’ve been her. Guiding her beautiful wife up the stairs, waiting at the bottom as you had your moment. That should’ve been her last name hyphenated behind your own. Instead, she sat hidden away. Wanting to support, and be there for you without ruining your evening with her past transgressions.

Your dress was simple and elegant. A silky black material, with a slit that traveled all the way up to your small waist and flared out beautifully. It trailed behind you as you gave Victoria a long tearful hug before stepping up to the mic and trying to speak. Your husband stepped up beside you pressing you into him. Your mouth opened, but nothing came out and you closed your eyes opting for a wet exhale as the audience cheered you on. Shuri’s eyebrows furrowed. Why was he still there?

You try again successfully “Whew, this is…..WOW!” You broke into tears again. As you spoke HE remained attached to your hip. Pressing your body into his side while you tried to deliver your speech. Shuri cocked her head to the side in annoyance. Until the sound of your voice took over the room again.

“You’ve all had to hear a lot from me tonight, so I’ll do my best to make this short.” A few chuckles float through the crowd. “If you look around you’ll see all of my family here. My mom, my sister, my bestie even flew in from his travels to be here tonight. Heeey Bruno!” You smile and wave and he smiled pumping his fist. “And my wonderful husband who’s always standing beside me. I love you baby.”  He gave you a peck on the cheek before finally stepping back. In an instant, a flash of sadness took over your face and you took a contemplative breath before speaking again. 

“A long time ago, I had a pretty amazing friend. Under difficult circumstances that friend grew to mean the world to me. Even in the middle of loss that would’ve sent most of us into a spiral of insanity, she didn’t break. She mourned, she tried, she failed, and she learned. She never gave herself the option to quit. Now today she stands as one of the worlds most powerful, innovative, world leaders of any time. Who has not only shown an undying love for her own people, but has spread that love over into our African American culture! And let us not forget she is a BLACK…WOMAN!” 

The entire crowd stood to their feet with a loud applause. You smile while wiping away a single tear, waiting for the crowd to calm down. “During my first album she’d fly in with her busy schedule, just to be in studio sessions with me and the crew until sunrise. Making sure all of our broke ass’s  ate and atleast got some sleep.” You laughed lightly as the crowd followed. “Outside of all of my musical inspirations that I’ve listed tonight, I would be remiss to not mention my greatest inspiration. The person who inspires my resilience, my tenacity, my work ethic. The person who showed me that it wasn’t enough just to be pretty and talented. But, that I had to be smart and unafraid to be a bitch that was about my business.” A few shouts of agreement sounded throughout the crow.

“So tonight I hope that she’s watching. I hope she’s proud, and I want her to know that if it hadn’t been for her, I would not  be standing here today. Thank you for loving me the best you knew how. But, most of all thank you for believing in me. This last one is for you Queen Shuri Udaku.” You held your award in the air before crossing your arms over your chest in a Wakandan salute. “Thank y’all.” The crowd roared.

Nakia and Okoye stood on either side of Shuri tears in their eyes, arms crossed over their chest. Shuri sat in shocked. Her right hand sat over her heart and her eyes were closed, as she listened to the sound of the roaring crowd. The day she lost you. She’d prayed. Prayed to Bast that she would make you and her family proud. That somehow she could rise out of the deep dark hole she’d dug herself into, clean and in good graces. Now, here you were taking your historic moment to acknowledge not only how she had impacted you, but her impact on the world. She let out a shakey breath standing to her feet. She crossed her arms over her chest. And she, Nakia, and Okoye placed there arms down to their sides simultaneously.

You turned to walk off of the stage and landed right into your husbands arms. He pressed your body up against his, trapping your lips against his in a sloppy kiss. When he pulled back. He yelled “Love this girl!” into the microphone. The crowd went crazy, clapping, laughing, and hooting. Shuri officially couldn’t do it anymore. Her hands shook. She was overwhelmed with the storm of emotions evading her senses and she needed to get away. 

“Shuri. Do you want to go, Usisi?” Nakia spoke up, noticing the distress in her little sisters eyes. Shuri took another sip of her drink. She nodded, wordlessly placing her drink back onto the table. Everyone at the table grabbed their belongings as Shuri stood to her feet. The Dora surrounded her, and Nakia and Okoye stood in front. 

Bruno looked up from his seat out into the sea of people, just in time to catch a glimpse of what looked like the Dora Milaje exiting the building. 

“What the fuck was that?” Your husband came up behind you whispering as you exited the stage. He gripped your hips rougher than necessary pulling you against him. “It was a speech Michael.” He nuzzled into your neck, breath tickling your ear. Your skin crawled.

“She can’t save you. You know that right? You belong to me.”

“Why on earth would you acknowledge her in your moment! That was YOUR moment y/n!”

“My moment to say whatever I wanted to say Dani.” You say, uninterested in your sisters opinion. You sat at the bar in your home sharing a celebratory drink with your mother and sister.

“And it was a beautiful speech baby girl. I’m sure Shuri was very touched.” Your mother says before glaring at your sister. “Dani we all know how you feel about Shuri. Let’s not ruin a good night with it.” Dani rolled her eyes.

“I’m just saying. She may be doing great things now but she still hurt my sister, so she’ll forever be the opp to me.”

“The opp? Girl…Ok street nigga.” You say rolling your eyes back at her.

“Well, it’s obvious the woman has grown and it’s ok for your sister to acknowledge that. Because she’s grown as well. Shuri didn’t go about loving your sister in the best way. But the love she had for her was undeniable. She just had some healing to do.” Dani smacks her teeth.

“Fuck her.” Your mother furrows her brow.

“Danielle” Dani quickly straightened up.

“Sorry Mommy.”

“Mhm. That’ll be my cue. I’m headed in for the night. I’m gonna go back to my hotel.” Your mom got up from her bar stool begining to grab her things. 

“Mommy we have plenty of room. I don’t know why you felt the need to get a hotel!”

“No no! You all need your space tonight. I figured you’d all be partying all night. And I may want to find me some company.” She winks at you and your sister.

“Oh nah. We’re not there yet mama.” Danielle says.

“Absolutely not. But do your thing girl!” You say, and you all laugh.

“Goodnight beautiful girls. Be safe tonight.” You mom threw over her shoulder as she walked out of your home.

“We should be heading out now too!” You give your sister an apologetic look before speaking.

“Rain check?”

“Y/n! I don’t want to hear that shit! Please tell me you’re not bailing on your big night! You won nine Grammy’s tonight! Let’s go have some fun! Everyone is waiting and want to celebrate you! This party is supposed to be one for the books.” Your sister stares at you incredulously.

“Well you go ahead! Everything was just alot tonight. I’m a bit overstimulated and tired. You know how I get. We can celebrate tomorrow I promise.” 

“Y/n-“ she began to protest.

“Really I’m ok. Me and Michael will celebrate in our own way.” She turns up her nose. “You’ll be back to see mommy tomorrow anyway. Go have fun! This is all of our night to celebrate! Take a driver!” Your sister hesitated, but eventually gave in.

“Ok. Tomorrow y/n.” She points with a stern glare. 

“Tomorrow.” Your sister looked at you with a bit of worry in her eyes. 

“You still thinking about her?” She asks.

“Who?”

“Don’t play dumb with me.”

“She did played a huge roll in all this Dani. Part of me wishes she could’ve experienced this with me.” Your sister shook her head in disapproval. 

“Well she can’t, because she fucked up that chance. She’s doing great ruling her country well. And you’re doing damn good without her. She wasn’t concerned with how you felt when she was cheating and how she feels now is none of your concern. Keep your eyes forward baby sister.” You cast your eyes downward. She lifts your chin.

“I’m so proud of you, and I love you.” She says giving you a hug.

“I love you too.“ You smile, and walk her out of your home. You shut the door leaning against it, you close your eyes and let out a small exhale. That’s when a full bottle of alcohol flew by your head. The sound of glass crashing on the door beside your head shocked your system, as a frightened squeal left your mouth. You gripped your dress preparing for impact. Michael grabbed you by the biceps pushing you into the wet spot and tiny glass shards left on the wall. 

“Michael! Please!” You tried breaking free to no avail.

He wrapped his hand around your throat hard. Cutting off your circulation.  

“How dare you acknowledge that bitch on our night?” 

“I’m sorry.” You rasped, hanging there helplessly. The color leaving your face.

“Don’t let all of these little accolades get to your head. You’re still a little piece of trash that lucked out and got me after the queen hung you out to dry. Remember that shit the next time you decide to publicly embarrass me.” He threw you to the ground into the pile of broken glass on the floor.

“Argh!” You yell out gasping for air, as glass peirced your arms.

“Worthless.” He mumbles as he walked away. 

You lie there in the glass, and once he was far enough away you inhaled deeply before, sobbing. Wondering how you had ended up here.

Rolls Royce, Bentleys, and Maybachs OH MY! The finest cars lined up outside of Sweet Lady’s home as they tried getting into the Estate. The open invitation Grammy’s party was indeed Bruno’s next door neighbors. He watched the house from the road as it lit up the sky. The music pumped loudly, and rowdy conversations could be heard for miles. Bruno maneuvered around the cars parked in front of his driveway trying to make his way up to his front door. A black envelope, lined with gold waited for him. Taped over the peephole. He looked around before carefully walking up on his porch, taking down the envelope and opening it. 

“I have an invitation!” Bruno yelled, with the card held high above the crowd. He found himself shoulder to shoulder with a sea of people trying to enter the gates of the grand estate. 

He continuously try’d showing his invitation to the random men in black suits that stood guard. But it seemed as though it didn’t matter, being that he was the only one who had one. Placing the invite in the front pocket of his suit jacket, he walked further into the party. His eyes filled with wonder as he’d never seen anything quite like this before. The home was exquisite. Lit up like an amusement park. It almost looked like a modern museum. There was a live band playing in the center of the fountain.  Dancers and servers everywhere with whatever food you could think of. Some for the bougie. Some for the hungry. And the drinks were endless! 

This home was what dreams were made of. Who is this Sweet Lady?

“Bruno!” A feminine voice called from behind him. He turned to see Dani waving above the crowd. “Hey! I see you decided to come! This place is insane!” She said. 

“Yea I did. I found an invite on my door. Did you get one?”

“No one got an invite.” Dani shrugged.

They moved through the party sipping cocktails and continuing their conversation. 

“Do you know her?”

“Only what I’ve heard of her. But no one has ever seen her.”

“Wow. I wonder who she is? She has to be a huge deal to live this way!”

“I’ve heard she’s some invisible industry big wig. That she controls the industry. You know Illuminati type shit.” Dani said. Another individual over heard the conversation as they began to ascend the stairs, and decided to add their bit of gossip.

“I heard she was a spy.” They say, causing a domino effect.

“I heard she was a bootlegger, on the run.”

“I heard she was a politician.”

“Who ever she is I’d like to know her.” 

Everyone looked at eachother able to agree on that statement.

“Excuse me? Peter? Peter Gene Hernandez?” A man in black interupted the gossip circle. Bruno was taken aback. That was him. His full government name.

“Um y-yes. That’s me.” He says, confusion apparent.

“Madame would like to speak with you. If you would follow me.” Everyone gaped at the scene dying to know what Sweet lady wanted with Bruno. Bruno looked at Dani his heart pounding a bit in his chest. She gave him a nod to follow the man and he slowly complied.

He was led through the large doors into a grand foyer, and up a staircase that could’ve easily been mistaken for something inside of the Metropolitan. Everything about this home was tastefully over the top. Whoever this mystery woman was, two things could be said for her. One: She was Classy, And Two: She was LOADED.  After being led through a long hallway. He was taken through yet another set of double doors that entered a much cozier area of the house. With beautiful furniture. Still plenty of room to entertain and a grand piano. A figure in a black and gold suit stood watching the party from a bay window. 

She was slender. Yet powerful in stature. Her hair was cut low. And her jaw, sharp. In some cases she could be mistaken for male. But for Bruno. There was no mistaking that posture. Before him stood…..

Shuri Udaku. Queen of Wakanda.

“Bruno my friend. How have you been?”

“Shuri?” She turned from the window. Finally facing Bruno. 

“In the flesh” She says raising her martini glass. Fireworks went off outside of the large windows as if this moment had been coordinated.  

“So I wasn’t tripping when I saw Dora leaving the award show?”

“No you weren’t tripping.” She giggled. “I guess we could have been a bit more discreet in our exit.” They both stood awkwardly. Shuri took a sip of her drink and ran a hand over head. 

“So they said you wanted to see me?” 

“Of course. Yes. Yes. I did ask for you. Um. I wanted to know if.. if she came?”

“Y/n you mean?” Shuri shifted on her feet.

“Yes. Y/n.” It was all starting to click for Bruno.

“No. She said she was tired.” Shuri’s face visibly saddened, and she turned back towards the window. Placing a hand into her pocket as she held on to her glass with the other. 

“She used to love parties…This was all for her.” Her head lowered. “I guess this was my way of celebrating her without having to disrupt her day.” Bruno looked at his surroundings.

“This house for her too?” Shuri just stared into Bruno thinking of a way to answer.

“In a way. Y/n always had big dreams. When we were together she always said she wanted something like this. Something huge outside of the Citadel where she could entertain, and have garden parties and things. Just some where for us to come and relax that had endless possibilities. So, I built her dream home. An antipode of sorts. I’m aware I’ll never have her again. But I come here when I want to feel close to her.” Shuri turned away from the window and walked over to the seating area placing her glass down and taking a seat. Bruno looked on, exceedingly impressed with the love Shuri had for you. “I know it’s silly. I just hoped that tonight she could atleast see it.”

Bruno thought back to tonight at the show. The blantant show of insecurity your husband put on. The cautiousness you held around him. How he wouldn’t let you have your moment completely. The inappropriate glances with other women that he thought no one noticed. Bruno had come to the conclusion that he didn’t really like Mike pretty early on in the evening.

“How’d you know I lived next door?” Shuri smirked. “Oh Bruno. You know better. I’m still extremely aware of my surroundings.”

Bruno chuckled, joining Shuri on the plush sofa. “If it’s any consolation, this place is amazing. And this is one hell of a party. She would’ve loved it.” Shuri leaned back before running a hand over her face. 

“Nah. This was stupid. I don’t know what I was expecting.”

“It’s really a beautiful gesture. Maybe you could talk to Danielle she’s here. She could put a bug in her ear.” Shuri shook her head. “Absolutely not! She’s more angry at me than Y/n. It’d be like arguing with a rock.” Bruno’s eyebrows rose in agreement.

“That’s true.” He leaned back as well. That’s when an idea hit him. “Hey! How about I invite her over for dinner tomorrow. Tell her to come alone. And you could join us.” Shuri sat up straight, her head turned towards him. She rubbed her sweaty palms against her pants before standing and pacing. 

“Y-you think she’ll come. That would be great! Dinner? That gives us plenty of time for us to get your grass cut. No offense. Griot. Contact the gardeners!” She began rambling.

“Whoa whoa. Calm down. Yes she’ll come. I’ve been gone awhile she’ll want to catch up.” The excitement in Shuri’s eyes was almost childlike. 

“Ok. Ok. Great! That’s great!” 

“So tomorrow?” Bruno stood, outstretching his hand for Shuri. She stepped forward taking his hand in hers and shaking. 

“Tomorrow.”

Bruno walked back out into the party. Dani stood at the entrance of the mansion waiting wide eyed as she sees Bruno approaching. She quickly meets him half way.

“Wellllllll.” She said excited for answers.

“I can’t give you anything. But just know… This all makes sense.”

The next morning Bruno woke up to the sound of power tools outside of his home. He quickly jumped up grabbing his robe rushing to his front door. He swung it open to see a crew of gardeners in his yard. Cutting grass, planting flowers. And… building a fountain? Shuri stood in the center of the yard overseeing the work being done. Bruno just shook his head and walked back into the house to prepare his home for when you arrived. 

Closer to time for dinner to start, rain started to pour from the sky. Bruno glanced out of the window of his kitchen as he put together some appetizers for the evening. An army of umbrellas marched up his driveway. Shuri leading the pack dressed to the nines. Bruno  opened the door for the barrage of people, Shuri stepped aside allowing them to enter Bruno’s home. The first two people carried a large 3 teir wedding style cake. The others carried tables, food, chairs and more flowers. “They say the rain will clear by evening.” Her eyes shifted around the yard looking over the work done. Her eyes never settling on one thing. 

“Yes it should.” Bruno says. 

“Is everything alright?” Shuri asks, finally looking his way.

“Ah. The grass looks fine if that’s what you mean.” Shuri looks around and then back at Bruno. 

“Grass? What grass?” And brushed past him walking into the house.

Time ticked by as they sat quietly watching the clock in Bruno’s living room. Shuri sat fiddling with her hands on the couch facing the clock. Her foot taping rapidly. Bruno leaned against the entry way to his living room watching Shuri’s internal panic. One minute after five Shuri hopped to her feet. 

“I can’t wait all day. She’s not coming. I’m going home.” 

“Shuri she’s only a minute late.” She rushed past him. “I’ll just go. She wouldn’t want to see me. Besides no one’s coming to dinner it’s too-” She was cut off by the honking of a horn as a car pulled up. “It’s her.” Bruno said grabbing an umbrella and rushing out of the door. Shuri froze in the hall eyes wide with regret before rushing back to the living room where she tried to find the best way to present herself to you. She eventually opted for an awkward pose by the sliding doors waiting for you to enter. 

Bruno rushed outside with an umbrella waiting for your driver to let you out of the car. The driver came around laying out a carpet for you, so that you wouldn’t step into the mud. Bruno held out the umbrella as you stepped out.

“This is a beautiful place you have Bruno. Why did I have to come alone? Are you gonna confess your love for me?” He laughs.

“Oh that’s a secret! Tell your driver to go far away!” The two of you laugh. “I’ll call you back James! His name is James.” You say as you both enter the house. Bruno allows you to walk ahead of him. You stop to check your reflection in the hall mirror before heading to the living room. You were stopped in your tracks at the doorway of the living room, your mouth dropping.

“Oh my God! Did you ransack a greenhouse?” You ask walking through touching all of the beautiful flowers. “He is in love with me.” You whisper to yourself. Bruno walks in behind you looking around in confusion. Shuri was nowhere in sight. That’s when he noticed the sliding door had been left slightly ajar. He let out a sigh, and you take off your jacket. Bruno took it from you to hang in the hallway. 

“That’s funny.” He chuckles.

“Wha-“

And there was a knock at the door.

“Give me one second.” He says as He ran to the door. There Shuri stood, now soaking wet.

“What are you doing?” He whisper yelled.

“I can’t do this! This is crazy!”

“Come on Shuri she’s here now! This is what you wanted.” She shook her head turning away.

“I’m leaving.”

“Stop it! You’re acting like a child.” Bruno chastised. Shuri stopped in her tracks. Turning back towards Bruno. She stepped forward, smoothing down her jacket. She charged forward into the house. 

“Is everything ok?” You say, hearing footsteps enter the living room as you stood gazing out of the glass sliding doors. You turned only to be met with the shock of your life. There she stood, in burgundy slacks and a matching jacket with golden flower embellishments, with the shoes that matched to the T. Though she was drenched, she wasn’t any less of the African Goddess you remembered. An ethereal beauty. 

“Shuri?”

“Sthandwa.” Shuri breathed, She felt like her heart would explode as she ogled at your beauty up close for the first time in years. It’d been five years since you’d left her on her knees in her hotel. The years spent alone had not been wasted. She’d matured immensely. Though she was the youngest to have ever ruled Wakanda, it was a well known fact that she was indeed the best. She’d dedicated her life to the well being of her people. And it’d kept her sane. But everyday she awoke feeling like a continuous failure. All because she’d lost you.

Now here you were. 

You wore a simple white dress that fell off of your shoulders. The sleeves were long but sheer. The skirt short but flowing. The sunlight beaming through the glass doors, hit you just right. Casting a glow around your silhouette. One could mistake you for an Angel. You were the first to break the awkward silence. 

“I’m certainly glad to see you again.” Shuri let out a puff of air as though she had been holding her breath. 

“H-hi. I’m certainly glad to see you too.” 

Your eyes slightly water as a smile crept up on your face. In that moment Shuri felt blessed. She’d never thought that she would see your smile directed at her again. Your eyes light up with the sight of her. A sense of relief passed her over as the two of you gazed at the other from across the room. The sound of a tea kettle whistling from the kitchen sounded throughout the house. But the two of you never broke eye contact. 

“Um. That’s the tea. We should head to the dining room before the food gets cold.” Bruno cut into the tension.

“Y-yea that sounds good.” Shuri agreed.

The two of you migrated into the dining room, as Bruno excused himself to the kitchen to grab the tea. Shuri pulled out your chair and you took your seat, as she sat adjacent to you.  The silence remained awkward as you both tried catching glances at the other without each other noticing.

Bruno came and sat the tea in front of the both of you. “The servers will be out with the food in a few. But, I forgot. I have this thing in town.” Shuri’s head snapped up towards Bruno the fear in her eyes apparent. “I know forgetful. But you guys enjoy yourselves I’ll be back as soon as possible.” He said rushing out of the house. Shuri got up quickly following him. “Be right back” she said to you before running behind him. 

“What are you doing?” She asked incredulously. 

“Im leaving the two of you alone. And you’re not going to get anywhere with her talking to me. Go back!”

“This is bad. This is a bad idea. It’s embarrassing!” Shuri said pacing and panicking. Bruno grabbed her shoulders.

“Hey! It’s ok. Y/n‘s inside waiting for you. Go get her.” Shuri swallowed. Giving Bruno a greatful nod. With that she went back inside.

“I’m sorry about that.” Shuri said as she sat next to you. You eye her as she sat.

“It’s fine. I’m guessing you’re nervous.”

“Yes. Yes you could say that.” You laugh softly.

“I have to say I am too. This was very unexpected.” 

“I realize that. I’m sorry if this makes you uncomfortable. I just.. uh.. I really wanted to see you. Congratulate you in person. I’ve never sat next to a nine time Grammy winner before.” The both of you laugh as the atmosphere started to feel a little less heavy. 

“Actually. Im really happy to see you Shuri.” Shuri sat forward a bit looking at you intently.

“I must tell you that your speech meant the world to me.” Your eyes widened.

“You watched?” Shuri broke eye contact. “Uh” Your face scrunches in confusion.

“You were there?” She looked back into your eyes. 

“I couldn’t have imagined missing it. I am so very proud of you. You’ve become one hell of a force, and you would’ve become that with or without me.” Your eyes glistened with tears.

“Thank you.” You whispered reaching for her hand that she slowly placed in yours. The smallest connection sent waves of electricity through the both of you. Today it would go ignored.

“There’s so much I want to share with you Shuri. We have so much to catch up on. I’ve missed you.” A tear fell from Shuri’s eye and she quickly wiped it away. “Yes we do. I’ve missed you too.” The servers began to bring out the food, it was easy to see that it was hand selected by Shuri. Everything she remembered being your favorite was on the menu. The two of you talked and laughed. It was refreshing, the way it had been in the beginning. 

When Bruno returned the two of you had made your way back into the living room with the drinks of your choice. Shuri’s arm was behind you on the couch, her body turned towards you as she listened intently to the words coming out of your mouth. He couldn’t help but smile. The sight was almost nostalgic. 

He cleared his throat, and was ignored. He rattled his keys and still wasn’t acknowledged. So he decided to just announce himself. 

“Heeey! I guess dinner went well?” You stood to your feet smiling. “Dinner was delicious.”

You turned your attention to the sliding glass doors and stepped out onto the porch. Staring out at the water. Shuri followed behind you.

“This is beautiful.. just open breathable air. You can even see the top of the buildings in the city.”

“It is quite beautiful. You have an even better view from my place.” You look at her in confusion. 

“Where is your place?”

Shuri points to the home straight across.

“So you are Sweet Lady.”

She chuckled. “I’d hoped you’d come to the party. But honestly, this was much more rewarding.”

“Well I’d love to have a tour.” Shuri’s heart soared. 

“Of course. Bruno! I’d like for you and y/n to come to my house so I can show her around.”

“Ooooh my-“ You say stepping inside the gates of Shuri’s home, stunned, thunderstruck. You couldn’t believe your eyes. A knot formed in your throat. “Shuri is.. is this-“ Shuri stepped up beside you. Taking in your reaction with an affectionate smile she replied.

“Yes. It is.”

“Our house.” You say, a lone tear fell from your eyes, as you look up at her.

“Our house, Thando.” 

“I-“ was all you could say. Words escaped you. 

“There’s so much to see. Ubusi. She directs you forward holding out her hand, gesturing for you to go ahead of her. Shuri and Bruno grabbed your hands leading you up the steps as you admire the architecture. The doors open to the entrance and your breath was taken as you stepped inside. 

Years ago, at the begining of your relationship you and Shuri designed this home as a game. A fun look into what could’ve been your future. After the two of you had finished you’d fawned over how the two of you meshed so well, and how this would be your dream home. With everything that happened the memory faded into the background. But Ofcourse Shuri’s masterful brain, brought it to life and made it into something you could have never dreamed of. 

Beautiful unique chandeliers, marble floors. The entrance with the most gorgeous tree growing in the center of the room. Shuri walked ahead of you leading you throughout the house. Introducing you to staff. Showing you every intricate and well thought out detail of the estate. 

The gardens were your favorite. There were many. An area to have garden parties. A meditation garden, a butterfly garden. Hell there was even a helicopter landing pad! Back inside, you swooned at the beautiful high ceilings of the living room, and the cat walk that surrounded it.

This was all so overwhelming. You felt like you were inside of a fairytale. You watched Shuri as she strolled leisurely through her home proudly. Her calm regality just fit so perfectly well within the home and you found your heart fluttering at not only the beauty of the home. But hers as well. 

The next area was the bedroom. Covered in marble. Cream, Olive greens, and gold. It was huge. Big as some peoples homes. It had its own living room and a bar area. A mirror sat above the bed that had another one of those gorgeous Chandeliers. The hers and hers closets were gold and grey, behind glass enclosures. Shuri’s closet being perfectly organized and the one meant for you empty. 

“Shuri?” She stopped in her tracks, hearing the tremble of your voice. She turned walking over to you. Bruno excused himself from the room leaving the two of you to talk.

“You don’t like it.” She looked worried. “I’m sorry if-“

“Shuri. I love it. How could I not! I’m just wondering. Why? Why all of this? We’ve been done for years. Why did you build our house?” Shuri was silent for a moment before reaching a hand for you to grab. “Come” You take ahold of her hand and allow her to guide you back into the room and onto the large furnished balcony. She stood behind you and pointed out over the water.

“Do you see that? That faint green light flashing on top of the building in the city. Directly across from us.” You look out, humming as it comes into your line of sight. 

“Yes, I see it.” You reply softly

“Remember the first time I messed up? You made it so difficult. One night I’d set up a picnic for you. Laid out blankets. Hung fairy lights. Had all of your favorites. You still weren’t feeling it.” She chuckled slightly, and you join her. 

“I remember that night well.”

“I told you that you could walk away if you so choosed. But that I’d always be waiting for you. That light is at the top of the building that you live in.” You gasp turning to look at her. “I excepted our fate and gave you your space. But I built this in honor of what we had, before it went bad. In memory of my greatest loss. And when I get overwhelmed and wish to be near you. This is where I come.” You gazed into her watery eyes with bated breath. A shakey breath left your lips before you spoke.

“Are you even real?” A small smile crept onto her face before she once again took your hand. “There is one last thing I’d like to show you.”

“What else could there possibly be Shuri.”

“You’ll see.” 

Shuri led you to another set of grand double doors that she opened for you. And led you down a spiral stair case. As the room came into view, a fresh set of tears fell down your face.

“A ball room.”

“Because can you really be a queen without a ballroom.” You both say recalling the moment you’d told her you’d wanted one.

“It’s official. I’m dreaming.”

“You most certainly are not.” Shuri stood behind you. Gazing at the joy radiating from you.

“Shuri this is… I don’t have words.”

You turn to her with tear stained cheeks and a glint in your eyes. You gave a mischievous smile, “Is there music?”

Shuri smiled. “Hm.” She placed a finger at her temple in faux contemplation. “Jovan!” A young gentleman entered the room onto the balcony where there sat a piano.

“My Queen.” 

“Would you play something for my friend Y/n here?” She looked up, and he gave her a nod before sitting at the piano.

The sound of light haunting piano resounded throughout the room, and Shuri looked toward you asking “May I have this dance.” Your face lights up excepting her offer, and taking her hands for her to lead you to the center of the room. It started off with Shuri’s left hand sitting lightly on your waist as her right intertwined with your left.

“ I've been waiting for something

Something I can't ignore

Maybe someone I've been waiting for

To bring me back to life one more time”

It felt personal. And when you looked up and into Shuri’s eyes you knew…These were her words.

“I've been praying for another chance 

To make me feel again

I've been sitting, reminisicing of a better day

Trying to reawake”

You found your self stepping closer into her. Your arm that had previously been on her shoulder sliding down and around her waist. 

“Coast to coast

I'm doing the most for a second chance

Just to feel again

Baby I try and try a thousand times

And I know why”

Your hand left hers and it joins your other at the small of her back. Your head lay comfortably on her chest as she wrapped you up in her arms as though you were the most precious jewel. Your body almost went into shock at the unfamiliar feeling of safety in her arms. Your lip started to tremble as you feel the vibrations in Shuri’s chest as she began to sing the words.

“When you left me,Oh you left behind every moment” Her hand lightly rubbed up and down your spine, as she rocked you side to side. “Back when you said we, Would grow old on a porch in the golden sun.” Your fist clenched the fabric of Shuri’s jacket, your body shaking with sobs. 

“It's not over

Said it's not over

As I shattered every memory across the floor” She ran her fingers through your locs before placing them behind your ear.

“When you leeeeeeeft” You let out a whimper from the words and pressed your body against hers tighter. That’s when it hit you. The pain in your side a reminder of what you had to go back home too. You flenched and Shuri pulled back.

“Are you ok?” You shook your head.

“No.” Shuri’s faced morph into one of confusion as she searched your eyes.

“W-what happened?” She softly gripped your arm and you flenched once again.

“Y/n-“

“ It’s nothing Shuri. I can’t. I-i can’t. I have to get home. Im sorry. This is too much. It’s just too much.” You took off back up the stairs to find the exit as Shuri called after you.

A choked gasp left your lips, as you lay in the center of your bed. Dress pulled up around your waist and hand inside of your panties. You rubbed quick circles into your clit as she ran marathons through your mind.Your eyes were shut tight and you bit harshly into your bottom lip as the sound of her voice, the light touches of her hand, and the security of her arms sat vividly at the forefront of your brain. Turning your head into your pillow, you bite into it to stifle your moan as you come up on your release. 

“Shuuriiiii…Ahh.” Her name tastes so sweet on the tip of your tongue. Your body trembles in the aftermath, and you let out a deep breath. Coming down from your high. 

“This is ridiculous.” You whisper. It’d been a week and you couldn’t shake her. She’d come back into your life and implanted herself inside of your brain. In the most inconvient of moments your mind would drift to her. Causing a goofy grin to spread across your face. You wanted to be near her. It was like her heart called out to you. 

You glanced at the phone on your night stand. 

“This is only going to cause trouble y/n. Don’t do it.” You spoke aloud to yourself. Unfortunately, it seemed as though you had no self-control when it came to the queen. 

“Fuck it.”

You snatched your phone up and found the number you were looking for. 

“Hey, Hey!” He answered after the second ring. 

“Heeeeyyy best friend in the world! How are you!?” Bruno let out a long sigh.

“Aw hell. What do you want?”

“Is that the way we’re greeting each other now?”

“Y/n/n” 

“Okay, okay. Did um. Do you have Shuri’s contact info by chance?” Your voice comes out light, almost shy making Bruno chuckle. 

“She left Kimoyo beads here for you.” You sit up quickly, a smile ghosting over your lips “I’m on my way.” Hopping off of the bed you run to freshen up, oiling your body, and throwing on a form fitting floral sundress. You call downstairs to have vallet bring around your car and head out of your room. 

“Where are you headed, Uto m (my sweetness)

“Oh Papa! You scared me. Um I was heading to Bruno’s. Dani’s meeting us and where going to do lunch.” 

“Hm.” He looks you up and down “You look good. You have been filled with joy lately my dear. Is it the return of your friend?” He says before wrapping his arms around your waist and kissing your neck. 

“I am happy my friend is back. Yes.” You cringe inside but you fake a giggle. Anything to get out of your suffocating house. 

“Hm. You smell like a harlot. All of this for Bruno?

“Stop babe. Don’t be silly. You bought me this perfume, and you know that Bruno is like a brother to me.  You’re gonna make me late. I already called the car up.” He took your ass into his hands squeezing before letting go. “You can go. But remember who you belong to.” You muster a smile. “I only belong to you Papa” You head out of the door with the intention of clearing your pallet by falling back into the arms of Shuri.

Your car barely rolled to a stop before you hopped out. Jogging up to Bruno’s front door begining to knock. 

“I heard you were looking for me.”

Your hand fell to your side and you turn to see Shuri leaning against your car. Eyes stalking your body lingering on your frame. She was casual today in black joggers, a plain white T, and a white Jacket with African patterned fabrics sewn into the sleeves and pockets.

“I figured I’d save you the call.” You heard Bruno’s voice come from behind the door inside of the house. If he was infront of you right now you’d kiss him.

You squirmed underneath her heated gaze. Her stare penetrating you through the form fitting dress.

“Well it seems you wanted to be found.” You say seductively, giving her a stare of your own. One of Shuri’s brows rose her curiosity officially peaked. 

“I’ve been waiting for you”

“So you knew I’d be back?” Shuri picked up on the change in your interaction with her.

“I can’t say that I did. But, I’d hoped that you would.”

“Well here I am.” The sultry tone of your voice caused Shuri’s head to tilt back eyes peering at you through hooded lids. Any other time the sex oozing from your pores would have knocked Shuri to her knees. As of now, there were more pressing matters.

“You look beautiful.” The words came out low and slow, her voice a lower pitch. “Turn for me.” She pulled moisturizer from her pocket, coating her hands before they met infront of her, rubbing together, gapping at you as though you were her prey. Your need to obey your panther was still ingrained deep into the crevices of your brain. So It was second nature for you to throw your waist length locs over your shoulder so that she would have a better look at you from behind while you turned slow, giving her a show. 

“Mm.” She egged on approvingly. When you finally faced her again there was an unreadable expression on her face. A bit of a storm brewing behind her eyes. However, your want for her made you none the wiser.

Her index finger motioned you forward and you happily obliged, wanting nothing more than to fall into her arms, searching for that feeling of safety again. Those hands, those deliciously attractive tattooed hands landed on your shoulders, slowly, achingly, her fingertips trail down to your forearms. Her thumbs began to rub gentle but firm cirles into your arm. Eyes downcast and focused on her task. The evenness of your skin tone began to wipe away as you both watched a bruised cut apear onto your arm.

Your eyes watered, trained on your arm, afraid to look up. You felt Shuri’s glower burning the side of your face, heating your body with fear and embarrassment. 

“P-performance injury’s.” You falsely claim, and Shuri hummed her disdain.

“Uyaxoka (You’re lying), I need to make something exceedingly clear, Bambo'lwami. You and I are both aware that there is not an ignorant bone in my body. Do not insult my intelligence.” A tear fell from your eye, dropping into the smeared make up on your arm.

“I did not call on you for body, Mtuwam. My intentions are not to seduce you, but to show you what you mean to me. So I will not participate in meaningless sexual banter with you, only for you to walk away from me back into the arms of an abuser. You have to know me better than that. Albeit, It’s been a while. But, my knowledge of the woman I love has not wavered. Mamela kum y/n, I’ll try not to jump the gun and allow myself to become irrational before you decide to be honest with me about whatever this is. I will not turn you away. But, I also will not use you at a time when you are vulnerable. You are loved by me completely and wholly.” Tears poured from their sockets as Shuri finally placed you inside of her protective embrace.

Your heart palpitated against your sternum as panick set in. She was calm. Too calm. What was she going to do?

“I feel you panicking Entle. It is true that everything inside of me is giving me the green light to end his life. The same thing that is driving me forward is holding me back.” She pulled away. Looking down into your eyes. “That is you. Say the word and it is handled.” 

“It doesn’t happen that often. Sometimes he just gets-“ Shuri placed a finger on your lips. A smirk that doesn’t reach her eyes settling onto her face.

“Sh. Don’t piss me off. I’m on edge here Y/n. If your not ready for me to handle it. I’d advise you not to speak to me about it. I damn sure don’t want to hear fucking excuses for him.” Her anger escaped its wall for a second before she fought it back inside. “He will be handled mtuwam. I’ll try my best to wait for you to come to terms with that.” She gently placed your head back onto her chest, placing her chin onto the top of your head as she continued to comfort you with her embrace. 

When all was said and done. Shuri stood tearfully in Bruno’s driveway, sending you back into the arms of your abuser.

Time flew by, before you knew it three months had past. Shuri had kept her promise; though she’d made it blaringly obvious that it was one of the most difficult things she’d ever had to do. She’d given you Kimoyo earrings that matched hers in multiple colors, because they were “more discreet than the bracelet”. They were to be on you at all times. Solely for her sanity while you were still with who she called “that man”. She was constantly back and forth between there and Wakanda. Still having duties to take care of, but it was clear that you intermingled with the top of her priorities.  

While in Wakanda, she was constantly checking your location. If she saw you out to dinner or shopping, extra money would appear in the hidden account she’d gotten you. If she was with you in New Rochelle, she would hire brands to bring there latest collections to the house so that you could browse from the comfort of home. Your closet at her home had filled copiously. You didn’t want to take the clothes home, so they stayed there. Being that’s where you spent the majority of your time.

Access to her home was unlimited, an obvious no brainer for her. “You are the architect. It was made for you.” She would say. Her way with words had always made you swoon. So, over three months your husband had heard excuse after excuse for why you were gone early and coming home late. You’d blamed it on your schedule picking up after the wins. Which wasn’t entirely untrue. However, you always had time to be with Shuri.

In the begining, your attraction to your ex came simply from what you already knew her to be. Resplendant, undaunted, and most importantly secure. She’d come with guaranteed saftey. But, now it was so much deeper than that. All in all, it was simply…HER.

She’d grown so much. There was such a patience and maturity to her. An air of calm that was unknown to her former self. She was slow to anger. Quick to contemplate and very solution based. Her walk, a confident saunter that made you weak in the knees when you’d see her coming in the distance. When she spoke, it was matter of fact, direct. She had no time for bullshit. Shuri had always been a hopeless romantic, grand gestures being her thing. However, the lengths she would go were impressive.

She’d take you on random excursions in her helicopter. A day trip out of the country was not uncommon. You’d go back home to your husband with a tan you hadn’t had that morning, and tell him you’d taken up tanning. Your favorite part of her that not many others didn’t get to see, was her sense of humor. She made you laugh from your belly and it felt special to witness. It was as if it was a piece of her that was only for you. Relaxed and completely wound down.

Over time, you watched her work tirelessly and still there was nothing she wouldn’t do for you, and no time she couldn’t make for you. She made that very clear. Shuri in the past few months had turned out to be many things. But, if you had to narrow it all into one simple word. Only one came to mind. 

Sexy.

It was bad. Every move she made turned you into a literal puddle. Her voice in particular made your spine tingle. And you’d be damned if she didn’t always smell edible. You felt like a preteen having your first real crush.

It’d been the longest two weeks you had ever encountered. Shuri had once again been out of the country, and this time you thought you would loose it. This was the longest stretch of time you’d not been in her presence since the two of you had reconnected and you were getting withdrawls. Today, she was due back and you couldn’t get to her fast enough. You threw on a cute tracksuit placing your hair in a high pony, to get ready to rush out of the house to head to her home. 

“FUCK!” You yell, you’d swung your room door open and your sister was on the other side.

“Whoa! Slow down sonic. Where you headed?”

“Damn! You scared the shit out of me. I was headed to the gym.” Your sister looked you over and your outfit matched your story. 

“Cool. Well I’ll join you. I could use a little sweat session. Let me borrow one of your sets and we can head out.”  She pushed past you into the room to head to your closet.

“Dani, I’m working with a trainer.” Danielle glanced over her shoulder.

“And?”

“And this is my alone time.” Dani turned to you fully. 

“Nah what’s up. What’s really happening? You’ve been M.I.A lately we always spend time together and somehow we’ve barely been in touch.” She sat on the edge of your bed. Waiting for a plausible answer.

“I-I just been working. There’s a lot of pressure on me with this new project after winning 9 Grammy’s everyone is expecting perfection.”

“I didn’t know you were even working on a new project?”

“It’s just-“ you were interupted by the flash of your Kimoyo earring against your sisters face and your eyes widened. 

“Bitch did your earring just take a picture of me?” She stood walking back over to you squinting at your ear, and then it hit her. 

She looked over your shoulder and around the room perplexed. 

“I just know damn well that this isn’t what I think it is.”

“What?” You say feigning innocence.

“Those are damn Kimoyo earrings.” 

“N-no-“

“Griot” Your sister announces.

“It’s nice to hear from you again Ms. Danielle.”

Your eyes shifted downward. Caught.

“Check the message y/n. Out loud.” You sigh.

“Griot, please open my messages.”

“Yes Nkosazana, The Queen says she will be in  shortly and has asked me to advise you to meet her in the garden.” Your sister throws her hands up dramatically walking away from you.

“Thank you Griot.” You reply softly.

“You sneaky bitch!” She whisper yells.

“You can stop whispering Mike caught a flight out this morning.”

“Good. YOU SNEAKY WHORE! You’re fucking Shuri!!” 

“Ok you’re doing a lot! And I am not fucking Shuri! We’re just friends.”

“Friends? Friends! On what planet can you be friends with someone who did you the way Shuri did. That’s not a friend!”

“Damnit Dani! Give the woman some grace! What she did was fucked up and it hurt. But it was over years before she proposed and she’d done the work, before word even got out. She’s an even better woman now. So your disdain for her is completely unwarranted. She isn’t that person anymore!”

“I call bullshit!”

“Dani it happened to me! So you should get over it! I have!” Your sister took a deep breath before continuing.

“Little sister I don’t want you to get hurt. You have a damn good man that would never hurt you the way Sh-“

“You don’t know that!” You scream. “You don’t know Shit Dani! Your talking shit but you were at her house sipping cocktails and watching fireworks on Grammy’s night; at a party she threw to celebrate me! In a house that she built in memeory of us!” Confusion took over your sisters face.

“Mike has been mentally, emotionally, and physically abusive for years! And Shuri would have NEVER done THAT! It took Shuri a second to see me and nobody else noticed! She’s kept me out of here and safe, so Mikes abuse has been minimal lately. She hates that I’m staying here. Afaid of the consequences of leaving. But she’s trying her best to be understanding, and takes damn good care of me sis. Such good care….I feel so loved. So protected, and she’s only being a friend.” Tears now poured down you and your sisters face. “So Yea. I’m leaving. And I’m going to go be with Shuri. Because I’m in love with her…You can let yourself out.” You walk out of your house leaving a stunned Dani behind.

Underneath the apple trees, you sat on a bench with your head lying on Shuri’s shoulder.  Munching on the perfectly juicy fruit, surrounded by the beauty of the garden. 

“This is nice.” Your eyes closed taking in the smell of the flowers, the fruit, and the woman. Shuri smiled. “Yes it is.”

“Shuri?” She hummed, signaling you to go ahead.

“My sister knows.” Shuri’s brown raised as she continued overlooking the garden.

“How much?”

“She knows that I’ve been spending my time here, and that you’re Sweet Lady… She also knows about Mike.” Shuri contemplated on your words a moment before she spoke.

“Thwandie?” She speaks softly in that voice you loved so dearly.

“Yes?”

“I’d like to tell you a story.” You lift your head. Eyes connecting with the sharpness of her jaw, and her handsomely gorgeous side profile. “Ok?”

“A few years ago, There was a young queen, who lost her heart. After she lost her, she felt as since of finality. A vast emptiness that scared her to her core. And as she tried to give her Princess space. Time to sit with the betrayal of the queen. That emptiness penetrated her deeply. It drove her insane.” Shuri took a deep breath and you lay unmoving on her strong shoulder as her arm found your waist. 

“So one day, she couldn’t take it anymore. She showed up to the princess’s home and she begged her forgiveness. Not for the well being of her love. Purely to mend her own brokenness caused by her own poor decision making. Needless to say the door was slammed in her face. Rightfully so. But the self righteous queen continued to bang and beg. Pleading with the princess to help her. All to no avail. So the queen placed her back to the door sitting, quietly crying. Woe is me. Until a few minutes passed and suddenly this wail comes from inside the house. Right on the otherside of the door. It was heartbreaking. Full of a deep ache. A soul wound. So she sat silently crying against the door, as her heart sobbed trying to cleanse herself of the wound the woman she’d trusted had given her.”

A solemn tear fell down your cheek, moans escaping your lips through the suppressed sound of hiccups. Shuri continued her own voice shaking as she held back tears of her own.

“I was still there. I heard it. Every body racking sob you let out. That sound etched itself in my mind for years. I got my shit together y/n. I sat and I tortured myself with the sound of the hurt I cause you. And I got up. And I got my shit together, and dedicated my life to being the type of woman who would’ve made you a proud wife. Because that’s what you deserve. That is what you have always deserved.” Tears welled from deep inside and coursed down her cheeks. “You said I inspired you. But you are THE reason. The reason for every move I make baby girl. The reason I learned to pray.” A sob escaped your lips as you turned looking out over the lake. Shuri shed tears of her own as she watched you. The sun was begining to set. Casting a beautiful light over your silhouette.

“I don’t know why you’re choosing to stay there with him. But, I’m ESTATIC that Dani knows. Because now I am sure that it will be short lived. I know it won’t be for me. But please… Leave him. I just want to see you happy.” Her eyes peirced into yours thoughtfully. You gaze back into her eyes, Your feelings beginning to bubble up ready to explode from your lips. 

“Shuri I-“

“Panther, M’Baku is trying to reach you.” 

“I apologize. I must take this.” 

“Ofcourse, I’m gonna go inside. The guys are coming over for a session I should get to the studio.” 

“Ok. I’ll be in shortly.” You smile and nod, turning to walk away, heart still racing from what had almost been said.

You stepped into the booth, befuddled by  Shuri’s words in the garden. You’d wanted so bad to let her know that she owned your heart. That and so many other parts of you. Every part. She had been the insperation behind your pen, Making words flow from you like a river. You’d pushed out soo many songs to use in the past few months, just dreaming of her being yours again. Now here you stood in her home studio, prepared to bring them to life. Bruno sat behind the sound board with your producer Leon, when the doors to the studio opened.

Shuri swaggered into the room with enough posh to bring you to your knees. She had changed from her more formal wear that she wore in the garden. Opting for purple joggers with a black button up jersey that had Wakanda written across the back in gold and purple gradient letters. A matching cap sat low over her eyes as she walked through dapping up all of the guys. Freshly showered it’d seemed. 

She sat on the leather couch directly in your line of sight, and your heart dropped into your stomach. Her smile brightened the dimmed room as she acknowledged you. Arms sitting over on the back of the couch as she man spread underneath the spotlight that was meant to highlight the art on the wall. Now there sat a much more interesting piece beneath it.

“You ready to run this one all the way through?” Leon asked. You tried peeling your eyes away from Shuri, it was as though her presence cast a spell over you. Your fingers graze against the fretboard of your guitar and you build up enough strength to nod signaling them to start. They start the countdown. And the music began.

“You got meee

You've got meeee

You've got meee

You got me speeeeechleeeess”

Your guitar sang, piercing throughout room to reach the woman you loved. 

“Where you been, baby?” Shuri laid her head back against the couch. Her eyes peering at you from underneath her cap.

“My heart starts trembling 

As I hear your footsteps pace”

At this point, everyone else had faded. There was only you and Shuri.

“Goin' out my head I think I'm losin' all my mind 

Drive me crazy burning candles, makin' love all night 

Feels so strange, it feels so crazy to be in your world 

In your arms lost for words, you got me”

You put every ounce of passion you had for Shuri into the song. Her bottom lip was now trapped between her teeth only amplifying your lust for her. 

“Layin' so closely 

I feel your skin rubbin' and touchin' me 

Only sweat between us 

Feelin' you kissin' and pleasin' me” 

Shuri began to involuntarily squeeze the cushions of the couch. Your words and voice coursing through her veins. She was now inside of your mind. Visualizing every word that came out of your beautiful mouth.

“I rub your back 

I kiss your neck 

I know that you love when we touch like that 

I can feel you need me 

Feels so good to me 

Feels so good to meeeeeee”

The tension was thick in the room. Shuri was hypnotized and you couldn’t take your eyes off of her. Wanting to see every bit of her reaction to you. The song gets more intense, your pretty breathy voice igniting a fire inside of Shuri.

“You got me 

You got meEeEee

You got meeeee

You got meee”

Your eyes open staring straight into Shuri’s.

“Speechless”

You go into another guitar solo. Your eyes shut tight as your fingers worked the strings with proficiency. 

“all I can say is 

Yeees 

Yeeess

YEEESSSS, all I can say is 

YEeEessss

YeeeEEESS

YEEEEAHHH, OOH!”

Your eyes opened and Shuri now sat on the edge of her seat. The look on her face undoubtedly lust. 

“Kiss me 

Hold mee

You've got me 

SSSpeechleeess”

The song ended and silence penetrated the room. Your eyes finally dropped away from Shuri’s. 

“I think we got it.” You say breaking the silence. 

“Yea.”

“That’s definietly it.”

“I don’t see it getting any better than that.”

Agreement scattered throughout the room. Shuri silently sat back on the sofa, her eyes never leaving you.

The rest of the night was spent perfecting and mixing the song. Discussing music for other projects, and bullshitting. You all smoke, drank, ate, and caught up. The tension however never left between you and Shuri. It was thick in the air and everyone felt it. The subtle glances. The avoidance of touching or being near eachother.

Everyone started packing up to leave one by one, until it was only you and Shuri left. 

“Bye love, I’ll come by tomorrow.” You say to Bruno as you shut the door to the studio behind him. Turning to Shuri who stood leaning against the mixing board. You cleared your throat.

“I guess I should be getting ready to head home.” Shuri nodded. 

“Yea. That’s probably a good idea.” 

“Probably so.” You agree, as you began to gather your things.

“If that’s what you want.” You hear Shuri say. It stopped you in your tracks. “It is pretty late.” She says fiddling with the rings on her fingers.

“Shuri.”

“Yea?” She finally looks up from her hands.

“I don’t want to go home.” 

“Then stay.”

“I’m gonna take a shower it’s been a pretty long day.” you announce as the two of you enter Shuri’s bedroom.

“Yea go ahead. Help yourself.” Though you were often at Shuri’s home, had a closet full of clothes, and her fridge was stocked with foods you loved. You had never spent the night. Always choosing to go home for the sake of discretion. But, tonight Mike was gone and with Shuri was were you wanted to be.

Shuri took off her shoes and unbuttoned her shirt, getting comfortable while you took your shower. She headed to her bar area fixing a drink before taking a seat in one of the plush chairs in the seating area of her bedroom, and turning on soft music. The soft warm lighting highlighted her toned stomach. Glistening against the simple gold chain around her neck as she leaned back, sinking deeper into the comfort of the chair trying to figure out what she was doing. This was dangerous. The two of you were playing with fire, and Shuri didn’t know how much longer she would be able to hold out. It was becoming apparent that the feelings the two of you had for each other were bubbling over. It was getting harder for this friend charade to last. 

She’d dreamed of the day that she could call you hers again. Nevertheless, this time she wanted to do this right. Questions flooded her mind. If the two of you crossed that line, how would you feel about her afterward? Would you regret it and run off? She didn’t want to ruin the progress that had been made with you. She could be totally misreading the signs. Shaking her head she took a sip of her drink, rings clinking against the glass. Sitting it on the side table, her finger circled the rim as she remained in deep thought.

The click of the door to the bathroom grabbed Shuri’s attention. You stepped out of the fog. A black lacy lingerie set with a robe to match decorating your frame. A diamond garter sat high on your thick thigh. Strappy stilettos graced your pretty feet as the smell of your fresh scent permeated the air. You strutted further into the room with all the grace of a super model. Shuri raised a brow as she looked to both sides of her, to be sure she wasn’t dreaming or on a trip. Her mouth sat slightly ajar as her eyes settled back onto you. 

Your walk had always been unmatched to Shuri; the sway of your curves was genuinely hypnotic. You approached the table infront of her with your alluring stride, stepping up onto the golden table, your pretty toned, gartered thigh peaked out from under the robe. Your fingers brushed against the pretty pendants that dangled from the chandelier, your eyes interlocking with Shuri’s.

“These chandeliers.. they’re made from vibranium? Yes?” You inquired seductively.

The rise and fall of Shuri’s chest was steady through the sports bra she wore under her opened shirt. Her heart pounding hard against her chest. She placed her drink against her lips  again taking a light sip, before nodding her answer.

You smile. “Good.” You pulled the tie of the robe from around your waist allowing it to fall open. You began to tie the strap to the bar inside of the Chandelier as you spoke, finally pouring your heart to Shuri. 

”You know Shuri. I wrote that song with you on my mind. I hope you felt that. Lately, all I seem to do is think of you. The smell of your cologne, the sound of your voice, the way you talk. You told me a while back that you wanted all of me, not only my body. Baby I’m ready to give myself to you. All of me. Because you deserve it.” You pur. 

“Y/n I-“ Shuri tried interupting, but you cut her off. “Shhhh. Let me talk, beautiful.” you placed a finger against your lips and Shuri obeyed.

“You treat me so fucking good Shuri. I can’t help the way my body reacts to you. The woman that you are. So strong, powerful, and yet you’re still so gentle and patient with me.” You close your eyes letting out a low moan. “Shuri. Shuri. Shuri. Just your name is enough to make my body tingle. It’s written all over me. All over her.” You grab onto the tie that now hang taught from the chandelier with one hand and your other made a trail down your body and stopped over top of your mound. “All over my kitty kat.” Your body trembled as your hand ran over your clit. Your eyes open, connecting with Shuri who was salivating. 

She had leaned forward her elbows on her knees with her drink dangling from the tips of her fingers. Her bottom lip was relaxed slightly seperated from her top, wet from her recently running her tongue over top of it. 

“Shuri, baby. You give so much. Work so hard. What I want to know is, who takes care of you?” You finally took full hold of the Chandelier and let your body hang, opening your legs wide for the Queen. “I can do that for you daddy. I’d do anything for you.” You began moving your body to the music as you hung from the Chandlier, showing off like an acrobat. Leaving Shuri In a daze “Will you let me?” Shuri let out a staggered breath. 

“Fuck.” Her voice was shakey. Her tongue once again ran slowly over her lower lip as she sat back in her chair placing her drink back on the table next to her. Moment by Victoria Monet began to play as you spun from the glistening beauty above you. Shuri was too stunned to speak as your body spun, streched, rolled and grind to the sexy song. If she was dreaming. Bast did she never want to wake up. 

“BhaBha, are you sure you want to do this?” Shuri finally found words.

“I’ll show you.” Every coherent thought that Shuri had been thinking before exited her mind as you dropped onto the table in a split. Removing the robe from your shoulders. You move out of the split onto all fours. Crawling over and placing yourself inbetween Shuri’s spread legs. You place your hands onto her knees and slowly make your way up the inside of her thighs, fingertips brushing against her womanhood before making up your way up to her beautifully toned stomach. You lean forward and kiss right above her naval. Her stomach tensed from the contact and she let out a muted groan. 

“Mm. My Queen. Do you know your power?” You continue laying sloppy kisses on her abs. “Do you see yourself?” She hisses throwing her head back against the chair, closing her eyes tight as her core began to throb. She gripped the arms of the chair. “Ahhh shhhit” She moaned.

You climb into her lap, kissing up her neck. “You’re tense baby. Have you been neglected?”

“E-entle, I-I can’t. We s-said we’d do this the r-right way.” Shuri tried to stand strong on her word, but you would always be her weakness. You bit right underneath her jaw before giving it a peck to ease the pain. 

“Touch me Sweet Lady” you moaned. “Please. I need it.” As if commanded by the sound of your voice both of her hands rose slowly from the arms of the chair, gripping the meat of your ass. The both of you moan out as if you’d waited a life for that exact moment. Shuri gently nudged the side of your head with her chin as you were busy sucking on her neck. The sexiest of bedroom eyes fell on you. 

Trailing your face down to your lips. You took your the hint, leaning in you exchanged breaths before you gave her your mouth. Sharing your first kiss in five years. You pressed into her gripping her shirt. You basked in the feel of he tounge gliding against yours. The walls crumbled. Any doubts about going further going with them. It started off slow and loving. Pecking eachothers lips softly. Slowly the Intensity built with the desire that had grown inside the both of you for months. It became a wet, sloppy, lusty display of affection. 

A groan fell from Shuri’s lips. Pulling away from you looking into those beautiful brown orbs. 

“I’ve lost restraint ubusi. It....it's..um... been a long time.” You pull back a bit searching her eyes. Yours grew in shock as you reached the realization of what she meant.

“Shuri? Have you not..Have you not had sex since we broke up?”

She buried her head into you, a bit embarrassed to say.

“I-I Uh…we… I couldn’t.” She whispered. You felt your core pulsate. Knowing that this gorgeous woman who could have had anyone in the world at her disposal waited for you. It made you want to give her the world. You wanted to please her in every possible way. She belonged to you. And you belonged to her. 

You grabbed ahold of her hands. Intertwining them in yours and placing a sweet kiss to her soft lips. You take one of her hands placing it over your breast. You take the other and place it on your clothed pussy.

“Don’t worry baby. It’s just like riding a bike. I know you still got it.” Shuri’s hand rubbed slowly against your pussy, her other hand squeezing your breast. She left open mouthed kisses all over the exposed skin of your chest, trembling at the feel of you. Your wetness coating her fingers through your panties. Your body was so hot you felt as though you would scorch her lips. Pulling down the lace of your bra, she freed your breast out of its confinement, before flicking her tongue over your nipple. She then began to suckle, moaning at the taste of your skin on her lips again. You roll your hips into her hand. And gripped the back of her neck, head rolling back.

“Oh yes. Just like that. You got it baby.”  You moan.

“You sound so fucking pretty like this.” Shuri whispered as she gave your other nipple some attention. The sound of her voice mixed with the sensation of her mouth on you and her fingers pressing against your clit made your vision blur.

“Fuck..we’re really doing this.” Her eyes were glassed over, trained on the whine of your waist. “We’re d-doing this Shuri. I need you. N-need you to make me feel good”

Her eyes shut tight. A groan of desperation reverberating from her throat. She bit into your nipple and your head lolled back letting out a whine.

“Demethi.” She whispered

Suddeny she was up on her feet with you settled easily in her strong grasp. She carried you the short distance, to a cushioned bench laying you gently onto your back. She stood above you, her sweats dipping low on her hips. The muscles from her hips and pelvic region making a perfect V. You moan at the sight of the African Goddess.

My God, this woman is in love with me? 

You thought to yourself as her hooded eyes stared down at you in admiration. The sight of you must have been erotic. Your breast pulled over the top of your bra, legs spread wide as your fat wet pussy soaked through your panties. As diamonds twinkled against your thigh. 

“Ubuhle bakho bundigqiba amazwi (Your beauty renders me speechless)” 

“Shuri Please baby. I need you. Let me show you how I feel for you.” 

“Patience Phakade lam(My forever). I want to take my time beauty. I’ve waited so long for you to be back in my arms. Let me take my time.” 

She settles herself between your legs, lifting your right leg placing a kiss against the jewlery on your ankle. She kissed, sucked, and licked  down to the garter on your thigh, before biting into the thickness beneath it. Unable to resist. She grasped the garter with her teeth pulling it down your leg maintaining eye contact. Once she got it over your heeled foot she sat up straight dropping it from her mouth. She repeated the same actions on your ungartered leg, except she made her way all the way up to the crotch of your panties. Nuzzling her nose into you. Taking in your smell. You grind your pussy against her face

“Baby please she’s aching. I need you so bad.”

“Turn for me.” You eagerly sit up making a show of turning over onto your stomach for her. You lay flat, and she grabs your hips pulling your ass up, making you arch your back for her. You spread open wide for her and bounced each ass cheek seperatly. Showing off. 

“Bast, so beautiful” She leaned down, pulling the string of the thong and setting it to the side of your ass cheek and spread you wide open. 

“I’ve missed you sphalaphala sam (my pretty one)”

Your hips began to rotate in anticipation. She placed her face between the cheeks of your ass and placed a lick to your needy cunt. 

“YES!” You yell, eager for her mouth on you. You go deeper into your arch. 

“Ooohh that’s what you want pretty girl?”

“Fuck yes Shuri. Please!”

Shuri lapped at your pussy a few more times before taking all of it into her mouth. She moaned at the taste of your wetness as she gripped each side of your thighs, spreading you unforgivingly. Your moans were trapped in your throat as a tear rolled down your cheek. Yes! It was finally happening. You threw your ass back against Shuri’s face as she opened wide, sticking out her deliciously long tongue. Placing it inside of your hole. She fucked you with her tongue as your ass slapped against her face. 

“Mmm. Smother me sthandwa.” She moaned into your pussy.

“Oh my God Shuri. Eat this pussy! Eat it. You better eat this shit! Just like that.! Yeeeessss!” Your praises landed on Shuri’s ears and sent signals directly to her swollen thick clit. She straddled the bench, getting comfortable as she cleaned her plate involuntarily grinding into the seat beneath her.

Her body quivered from the sounds coming from your mouth mixed with the squelching of your cunt. Fuck was she going to cum untouched.

“Uhn, uhn! Shuri! Oh Shuri! I’m gonna cum.”

“Let it go baby! Drown me! Cum on my fucking face!” On command your thighs began to shake and Shuri pressed your ass into her face taking hold to your clit trapping it between her lips. 

“I’m cumming! I’m cumming! I’m cuuuummiiiiiinng!” You scream as Shuri held you against her as your body convulsed. Trying to fall flat against the bench. Shuri felt herself on the cusp of her own release and quickly removed herself from the bench. Face drenched in your nectar. 

“Stay arched for Nkosazana. Please.” The sexiest groan left her lips. “I need to cum.”

You felt her hips grinding into you desperately from behind, She remained fully clothed much to your dismay. You felt her heavy breath against your neck and you panted along with her. Feeling high from her touch.

She pressed herself up against you. Running her hand up your spine she unclasped your bra with expertise. As she continued rolling her hips. Bending over she began placing kisses along your spine. Her hot breath making your body shiver. She made it up to your collar bones wrapping her arms around you gripping at your breast. She planted sloppy kisses on the back of your neck. Grunting as she grinded making your clit jump aching for her to touch you again

“Shuri baby?”

“Hm.” She groaned as she continued to kiss you.

“Use me. Please use me baby. Make yourself cum on me. Take what you need.”

Without hesitation, Shuri sat up on her knees not bothering to stand to take off her pants and boxers. She pulled them just below her ass and placed her thick swollen clit onto your ass grinding against it as you pressed yourself into her. “AhOooh. Oh Bast.” She moaned deep as her body jerked on contact, her clit sensitive and aching for release. She began thrusting into you with fervor. Face scrunched biting hard into her lip as she selfishly cosintrated on her release.

You reach between your thighs rubbing circles into your clit as Shuri ground her pussy into you. 

“Oh Fuck Shuri! You like how that feels daddy. You like how this thick ass feels against that big clit daddy.” 

“Fuck. Yes! Yes y/n don’t stop. Ah! Keep g-grinding that shit for me uuhhnnn r-right there. Oouu you feel sooo good.” She wound her waist behind you.

“Oouuu Panther, Never. I’ll never stop! I love it when you use me!” 

Shuri gripped the back of your thong with both hands using it as leverage to press you further into her as she leaned her torso back slightly watching you work against her. Her head lulled back, her eyes rolling to the back of her head. You could her breathing start to pick up behind you as she began thrusting against you. You arched harder and she gripped the flesh of your ass hard. You knew it would surely leave bruises. She let go of you with one hand getting one of her pants legs off with the other to get a better angle against her clit. She began to spread you open as she concentrated on her nut. That’s when her engorged clit slipped into your folds. Your hungry hole sucking her in. Both of your mouths fell open at the sensation. Shuri’s thrust got impossibly faster as your pussy clenched onto her clit doing kegals. 

A moan attempted to escape Shuri’s lips but it only came out in choked gasps.

“Pretty girl. T-take it eaaaasy on me!” You were insatiable feeling Shuri inside you. Teasing your hole as you rubbed your clit ferociously. It was like nothing either of you had ever experienced before. 

“I want to feel it! I want to feel your pussy cum inside me!”

Shuri felt the pressure building and she could no longer hold it. She reached forward grabbing your locs, bending over to get her clit as deep inside of you as possible.

“You’re s-so fucking nasty. It’s so u-unladylike Entle.”

“I don’t want to be a lady. I want to be your dirty little slut. The Queens whore.” You spit back at Shuri. She let out a low growl, grabbing your hips, slapping her own against yours, fucking into you hard. 

“Bast! I’m cumming! I’m cumming! G-Grip me! Bhaby grip me! I wanna fill that pussy.”

“Yes Shuri yes! Explode in this pussy!”

An animalistic howl left Shuri’s mouth, the sound triggering your own release.“Uuuuuhhhnnn.” She pulled your body up completely by your hair. Pressing you against her. Her hips stuttering and body shaking as she released years worth of cum onto your waiting ass. “Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck.” She mumbled as you continue rubbing your ass against her, wanting to milk her of all her essence. She burried her head into your neck. Still quivering from her release. Both of you collapse onto the bench.

“You Definietly still got it Shuri.” You say breathlessly. You both laugh.

“The Queens whore huh? Oh Thando. You’re in for a long night.” Shuri says. You turn your head around, capturing her lips in a kiss. 

“You waited for me. I have all night tonight and every other night after. Just tell me what you want. Now, I want to taste your cum.” 

Shuri rose to her knees and you turned to face her straddling the bench. You came face to face with Shuri’s pretty brown soaked pussy. 

“So beautiful.” 

You smiled having missed the sight of her thick clit that  jutted out from her pussy lips. You give it a lick and her body jolts. Still sensitive from her orgasam. You give it a few more licks before immersing it with your mouth. Sucking it up and down as if giving her a blow job. Shuri wrapped your locs up in her hand as she gently thrust herself into your mouth.

“Oooh baaaaby.” She groaned. “Just like that. Good fucking job.”

You moan at her taste and encouragement. Your hands travel up her legs caressing her hamstrings. One of your hands continued up finding its way between her thighs. Your middle finger finding its way to her tight hole. 

“Shit. Mtuwam fuck me. Ahh!” It came out in a blissed out whisper as she continued to control the movements of your head.

“Mm, so needy” you moan into her aching twat. Shuri’s eyes were closed her mouth ajar concentrating on the pleasure you were giving her. You watched her abs contract with each thrust as your other hand found it’s way back between your legs. Shuri’s breathing sync’s with her thrust and you knew she was close again. Slurping at her bud you add another finger going a bit faster. Her legs began to tremble and you got ready to drink her sweet nectar. 

“Yes that’s right give me another one Panther. Bless my mouth. You deserve it.” you whined.

“It’s coming baby! Catch it for me!” You opened your mouth wide and flicked your tongue over her clit. 

“Uuuhhh it’s coming baby! It’s -“ Grabbing the back of your head she pressed you into her and her juices splashed onto your tongue and all over your face as you fucked her through it. 

“Ugh it so good! Soso good!” Shuri screams as she let go again. You continue lapping at her getting her all cleaned up. Once she caught her breath she released you from her core. Bending down to place her lips on yours.

“Thank you so much for pulling that out of me. I needed that. Now daddy’s going take over pretty girl.” She smirked. Your core clenched around nothing anticipating Shuri’s next move. 

She motioned you closer to her with her head wanting nothing more than to please the panther, you obeyed. She grabbed your arms wrapping them around her neck, and stood from the bench. Gripping underneath your thighs, wrapping your legs around her waist, she finally shook the other pants leg from her leg and carried you over to the bed. She tapped your ass twice signaling you to stand on the bed, motioning to the chandelier that hung from the mirrored ceiling. You smirked jumping slightly to grasp onto the bar inside. 

“Show me how wide you can open up for me.”  She said as she removed her shirt and sports bra. Finally standing before you completely naked. You spread wide open for her. Revealing your bare and soaking wet cunt. 

“Stay just like that for me.” She pulled up her camera on her Kimoyo beads. “You don’t mind if I take pictures do you?” She stood back watching you. “You just look so beautifully erotic.” Her sensual gaze caused your core to pulse, and you spread wider for her camera.

“Mmm, that’s my girl. Look at how fucking wet you are. Hanging from my pretty Chandelier.” She saunters over to you closer placing her thumb onto your clit. You hiss. 

“This shit is innovative sthandwa. I love your mind.” She said as she rubbed her thumb up and down your sensitive bud. “Let’s play a game. How much longer can you hold on while I taste you? Hm?” She stepped forward placing a kiss directly to your clit. You moan thrusting your pelvis forward chasing her mouth. 

“Oouu look at you. You needed daddy’s mouth?” She didn’t waste anymore time. She dove in with an open mouthed kiss right to your core. You placed your thighs on her shoulders grinding into her face as you literally hang from the ceiling. 

“Oh God! I missed that fucking tongue daddy!” You threw your head back watching the scene play out on the ceiling. She went between sucking your clit and fucking you with her tongue hands free. 

“You taste *slurp* so fucking *slurp* good *pop*” She slapped your ass hard. The stinging pain mixing perfectly with the pleasure she gave.

“Mmm. It’s so good! You’re the fucking best!.”

The longer she went, the more your body began to tense and shake. Concentrating on holding on becoming an after thought along with your hands becoming sweaty. Your hands slipped and Shuri’s panther reflexes came in handy. She caught you by the ass, both of you landing roughly onto the bed. Shuri didn’t miss a beat. Your legs started to close as you got closer to your peak. Shuri slapped the inside of your thigh.

“Be a good girl. Keep them open for me.”

She carressed your thighs as she enjoyed her meal. You spread them wider and she rewarded you with those beautiful long fingers. Pumping in and out of your pulsating hole. 

You look down, watching her long tongue circle your clit, before disappearing inside of you. Her eyes closed savouring your taste as she made your body feel better than it had in years. 

“You feel s-so good Shuri. Ssss so good.”

Shuri curved her fingers hitting your spot, she opened her mouth wide using her entire tongue to place over the entire length of your clit pressing against it putting the perfect amount of pressure. Moving her head up and down. She looked up at you as she worshipped your pussy. Your back arched pressing against her more. Your legs began to shake. Your hands reach between your legs and to the top of Shuri’s head. Her movements became short and choppy knowing you were close. 

“Give it to me gorgeous. I’m thirsty.” She demanded.

You gasp. Pressing her further into you as your body began to quake. “Mmmm baby baby baby!” You shout over and over, gasping for air as you cream heavily onto Shuri’s face. 

“Mmhmm, mhmm, Let it out.” She pulled back after you stop shaking taking a look at her work. Watching the cream leak from you. 

“I missed you pretty girl.” She spoke into your pussy nudging it with her nose before diving back in to clean her up. “Thank you for keeping me hydrated mama.”

She kissed up your body now hovering over you. “And thank you for letting me taste her again. I promise she’ll never want for a thing.”

Your juices sat on Shuri’s face, dripping from her chin. Her eyes, blown and focused. You opened your mouth and she smiled, opening her own and sticking out her tongue. You lift up sucking your juices from her tongue, and cleaning her face with your own. She lay between your legs grinding up against you as the two of you share your juices in a kiss. 

“I need to fuck you now baby. Can you give me more. I want to make you cum all night.” Her breath against your ear sent tingles down your spine and there was nothing you wouldn’t do for her in that moment.

“Please. Please fuck me.” Before you knew it Shuri had plucked one of her Kimoyo beads from her bracelet, placing it against her twat. She tapped it and it expanded into her wide curved strap. She places one of your legs on her shoulder slowly entering you with a groan.

“Ohhh Shuriiiiii”

She enters you in one smooth push, making you gasp like a virgin on her first time. Lovingly, she looks into your eyes, and begins to fuck you into oblivion. She knows... instinctively knows...what you need. She whispers into your ear, "Ooooh y/n…...I'm going to cum in your pussy.” The notion fills you.  All you want is her cum. At this moment she could talk you into having her baby.

“I missed this. Uhn, being inside of you. The f-feeling of you g-gripping me. So wet, so fucking  tight.”

She rolled her hips one of your legs on her shoulder the other around her waist. Tears began running down your cheeks. Speechless. Your pussy was so sensitive. Shuri kissed the tears from your cheeks as she continued to thrust inside of you. Your moans of pleasure her motivation.

“So pretty, such a pretty pretty sound. The prettiest song you’ve ever made.”

Her thrust started to speed up. “I want more of it.” She took the leg from around her waist placing it on her other shoulder and sat up on her knees. She was completely in control, as she gripped your hips bouncing you on her dick allowing deep penetration. You moan salaciously "Fuck me....fuck me deeper!" She pounds you banging hard into you. You were so out of it in your pleasure that you hadn’t noticed Shuri moving you two up the bed until your back hit the headboard. 

“Damnit Shuri I c-can’t! I c-can’t take it! Too gooooood! Sooo deep!” Her thrust made your words staccato as you did your best to fuck back into her. 

“Yes you can. You’re taking this shit baby. Taking me so well.” One of her arms was straight out holding onto the headboard as her other assisted in bouncing you into her. 

“Shuriiiiiii!!!” You yell as the pleasure became overwhelming. This caused her to press into you deeper pausing to feel your pussy squeezing against her. She slowed down. Choosing slow hard strokes, so you could feel all of her. You were full out crying now. A delirious mess.

“That’s right baby cry for me. The only tears I want to see. This pussy is mine now. Nobody else can have my pussy..”

You tried to reply but it only came out as gibberish. “I want to hear you baby. Who’s pussy is this?” You gather up strength to reply.

“YOURS PANTHER!!” She gives another slow and hard stroke. “What’s my name?!” Your head fell to her shoulder as tears continued to pour. “Uuuggghhh.” Your moan came out in a gurgle.”

Shuri’s hand that had been on the wall was now around your throat. “Uhuh. I asked you a question. What’s. My. Fucking. Name?” She punctuated each word with a thrust. 

“AhhhUuuuhhhhnn!” You screamed. “SHURI!!”

“All of it b-baby! Say your wife’s name.”

“AAAAAja-A-A Adanna SSSShuri FUCKING UDAKUUU!”

“That’s a g-good f-fucking girl.” She praises against your lips.

Dazed and fucked out you began to speak gibberish. Spewing out whatever came to mind and Shuri replied the two of your foreheads pressed together lips ghosting over one another’s, as the two of you reached your peaks.

“I don’t ever wanna leave.”

“You don’t have too”

“I wanna have your b-babies”

“We can have as many as you want.”

“You fuck me so good”

“I’ll fuck you like this everyday for the rest of our lives”

“Uhn God your so sexy”

“And I’m all yours Entle.”

“Ooouuuu I’m cuuuummmmiinnng.”

You feel her body stiffen and know she will cum too. Finally she groans, "Oh y/n....I'm cumming with you!" Deep inside, you feel the cum shooting into you, and it tips you over the edge. You cum savagely, squirting onto Shuri’s strap, and your world shattered into bright shards of light and colour. Shuri had captured your mouth as the two of you came both of your moans and groans of pleasure shooting down eachothers throats. Shuri’s hips continued to stutter inside of you as she gave slow less powerful thrust. Your head lolled down onto her shoulder, as the two of you slide down the head board.

Your body was spent and you were dozing. You hadn’t been fucked that good since you and Shuri broke up. Just quick sessions of huffs and puffs until Mike got his. Leaving you to fend for yourself. She fucked you so good you could suck your thumb. 

“Sthandwa, let me hear you.” Shuri said after a moment of recuperation. All you could manage was a hum. Her hand came to the top of your head massaging your scalp as you lay on top of her body.

“Uthando Iwami lungangolwandle. Impilo yami ngeke ibe lutho ngaphandle kwakho, Ndiyakuthanda.” (My love for you is greater than the ocean. My life is nothing without you. I love you)

“I love you too Shuri. My dear Aja-Adana.” Shuri lifted her head kissing your forehead.

“Thando?”

“Hm.”

“Can you give me one more?” Your body was screaming at you. Bone achingly tired, and your pussy was at capacity. But you wanted nothing more than to continue making love to Shuri. So you rolled over onto your back and spread your legs for her. She sat up, looking down at you as if you were the worlds most precious gift. 

“Awusemhle (You’re beautiful)” Your tired eyes looked up into hers that had glazed over. She bent down placing a kiss to your tired sloppy cunt, and you jerk at how sensitive you are. She gave loving licks to your pussy. Doing her best to ease the ach before getting your last orgasam from you. 

“One second.” She got up and headed to the closet. When she came back she held in her hand a double sided dildo. “Can you take it mtuwam?” You didn’t know. But you were definitely going to try. You held out your hand to her and she placed the toy inside. You lubricated the toy with your mouth and slowly inserted it into your aching hole.

Shuri’s eyes lowered as she watched you pump it slowly in and out. She crawled over to you, and sat legs open wide. She pulled you closer to her by the backs of your knees, and placed your legs over top of hers, inserting her end of the dildo.

“Ahhhhh” you both let out satisfied moans as the two you began moving your hips, your clits kissing as you meet in the middle. Shuri wrapped her arms around your waist, and you wrapped your arms around her neck. Moans and groans resounded throughout the room over the music that was now Victoria and Kehlani crooning about wanting to be touched. You could relate. Hands probing and carressing every inch of eachothers body as you bounced against Shuri’s lap. Your bodies dripped with sweat, intertwined, moving against eachother like well oiled machines. You leaned back so that she could get a better view of your beautiful breast bouncing. She leaned forward catching one in her mouth, bitting into your nipple and then running her tounge in a circle around it before sucking, and repeating with the other one. 

She pulled you up placing her head in the crook of your neck. Biting licking and sucking. At some point it all stopped and the two of you could only focus on the feel of eachothers bodies this close to eachother again. You had found your way back into eachothers arms. When Shuri pulled back, you both recognized the stain of tears streaming down eachothers cheeks. 

“I’m so sorry I ever hurt you.” She choked out with a sob. Your hands cupped the back of her neck as you brought your foreheads together. “Thank you baby. Thank you for giving me another chance. I promise you won’t regret it.”

“I know Shuri. I know.“ Shuri’s hips began to move faster in a circular motion. Sighing, moaning, and crying the two of you were experiencing a pleasure neither of you had felt before. It was otherworldly. Your lips ghosted over eachothers breath combining as you made love. 

“Bast. You feel so good. I don’t ever want to loose you y/n. Be mine again. Please baby. L-let me call y-you mine. Shit!”

“Aaahh! I’m already yours Shuri. I belong to you.” Shuri’s pussy squeezed the dildo and she took control. Fucking you harder. 

“Oh Shuri! Im about to cum. Cum with me!”

“Mm Mm. Not yet. Let go now baby. I’ll join your next one.” 

Your body couldn’t hold it you released hard all over the toy. Shuri gripped your waist harder not stopping.

“SH - SH-SHURI!!! I-I can’t! OOOOOHHHH GOOOODDDUUUHHH!!! I can’t cum anymooore”

Shuri grabbed your neck continuing fucking herself on the dildo as it also stroked your sensitive inside. She nodded. “You can take it, Entle. You’ve been wanting me to fuck this pretty pussy for a while now. Let me get the big one out of you!” Your mouth was frozen open tears pouring down your face. The look on your face had Shuri ready to explode. She could no longer hold it. 

“Come on baby! Finish for me. You can do it! I’m cumming y/n! Pull it out of me!” An intense pressure built up inside the two of you as the sun rose over the horizon, and the both of you reached your final explosive climax’s.

“UuuuhhhAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!” You let out a guttural scream as your body convulsed and squirted.

“FUUUUUUCCCKKKK, Fuuucck, Fuuuuuckkk!!!!” Shuri groaned as her own juices splashed against yours. You both reached down rubbing your hand quickly side to side over your clits, juices still flowing splattering all over eachother. 

The two of you collapsed, seperating from eachother; but, covered in eachothers cum.

“We should take a shower.” Shuri said after slightly coming down from her high.

“I can’t move.” You say half dead. Shuri laughs. She sits up grabbing a blanket from the end of the bed. She grabbed your hands pulling you up, wrapping your arms around her neck. And bringing you over to a dry side of the bed. She wrapped you both in the blanket as you intertwined your legs with hers lying on her chest. 

“The suns coming up.” You say.

“I noticed. I guess we got a bit carried away.” She chuckles

“A little.” You join her.

“Sthandwa.”

“Ewe.” Shuri smiled at your use of her native language, before turning serious. 

“He cannot have you any longer. I mean that.” She grabbed your chin lifting it so that you could look at her. “The marriage is done. Time is up. You are mine and I want you here with me.” You smile, placing your bottom lip into your mouth. 

“And here is the only place I want to be.” You say before the two of you drift into a peaceful sleep.

Click, Click 

The sun blared into the room. Soft music still playing over the speakers. Shuri lie flat on her back, as you lie betwixt her legs, head resting on her naked stomach. The room was blurry as you streched opening your eyes. Your movement caused Shuri to stir beneath you, her grip tightening around your upper back. You lift your head to rub your eyes when the back of your head was met with cold steel. Your heart fluttered, as you turned your head only to be met with a familiar silhouette. 

“Shuri.. Shuri baby..” You call out tapping her side frantically as tears began to form. 

“Don’t be scared now, Waka. You disrespectful cunt.”

Shuri’s eyes popped open, at the sound of the male voice inside of her room. 

“What the fu-“ She came face to face with your husbands calm demeanor. As he held a pistol to the back of your head. The anger in his eyes unmistakeable. Her eyes found your panicked ones looking up to her with sheer terror. Your breathing was erratic, and your palms began to sweat.

“Be calm Thandiwe. You are safe with me.” Calm, steady, not an ounce of fear, could be detected in her tone. 

“You are a smart man Mr. Addai. Atleast that’s what I gathered from my extensive research.” Shuri brought her hands up to rest underneath her head. Her small perky breast exposed, however she was unfazed. Mike brought the gun up to her quickly. 

“I already have a bullet in the chamber. I suggest you not move a muscle.”

“Relax. What are you afraid of? You’ve got the upper hand. The gun, the element of surprise. We’re only two women. What are we going to do?” Staring Shuri down, he kept the gun, and his attention on her. “Ubusi, go fix me and your husband a drink, and bring my robe. Cover yourself, your body is no longer his to see.” 

Mike began to move the gun back to your head and Shuri quickly reached up grabbing the barrel, placing it back onto  her.

“Ah ah on me oo.” She looks him dead in the eye, She acknowledges you again only with her words. “Do as I say my love.” You instantly get up from the bed taking the covers with you revealing Shuri’s naked, cum stained body. His eyes followed you as you scurried off of the bed.

“Don’t even think about it.” She whispered, bringing his attention back to her. His eyes trailed Shuri’s beautiful toned, cum stained body. “Excuse, the mess. We got a little carried away and passed out. So much cum. Have you ever made her cum? Didn’t seem like it last night.”

“You talk a lot of shit for a bitch with a gun to her head.” 

Shuri chuckles. “Common sense. It betrays you Michael. What was your plan? To walk armed into the home of the Queen of a nation, quote undetected end quote, into an unguarded room. Hold a gun to my babes head, and somehow make it out alive to take her home?” She once again chuckles. “Did it not feel wrong when you walked the halls and not one guard or Dora spotted you? And here I believed you where at the very least a critical thinker.” Shuri cocked her head to the side, sizing him up. “We all but rolled out the red carpet for you. Idiot.” She whispered. Fear resonated behind his eyes, they darted from side to side now searching for Shuri’s henchmen.

Demure in the presence of the Queen, now clothed in your robe you approach her with her own, and the drinks that she’d requested. Composed and unafraid she stood to her feet without warning.

“I said don’t move!” Michael screamed, clearly unnerved. You place the drinks on the table beside the bed, and Shuri turns her back to you as you hold her robe open, so that she could ease it on. Shuri side eyed Mike, amused at his irratic behavior. Choosing not to acknowledge him at the moment, she placed a finger underneath your chin.

“Enkosi, Bambo'lwami. Be a good girl for me and stay out of the way.” She spoke sweetly as she placed a sweet kiss to your lips. Your gaze met hers adoringly. Even in imminent danger, she made you feel as though you were the only ones in the room, making your body react to her. You nod, “Whatever you want, baby.” It came out more seductively than you intended, and Shuri smirked, raising a brow. You turned to walk away and she bit into her lip.

“I’m going to have fun with that later. You smell that?…” Shuri sniffed the air. “That’s her arousal.” Shuri smirked. Picking up her drink from the table. 

“Fuck you!” Mike yells, Shuri cringed.

“I think not.” She says, cooly taking a sip.

“My problem is not with you.”

“I bet it isn’t.”

 “You saw an opportunity and you took it.”

“Is that what I did?”

“I’m leaving here with my wife.” Shuri stepped forward into his gun, the barrel between her eyes.

“I wish the fuck you would.” Mike took a shakey breath and In the blink of an eye straightened his arm out to the side pointing it towards you, letting out a shot. You scream falling to the floor, and Shuri took the thick glass and shattered across Mikes face. Dora rushed into the room. “Take her! I’ll handle him.” Shuri’s attention now lie on the groaning man on the floor. She bent down to his level, gripping him by the neck.

“I hear you like to fight women. Fight me.” Her demeanor was still calm as she spoke. Mikes face scrunched in pain. 

“Come oooon now. No way way my little weak woman blow has you out already? Big strong man. Goooriiiillaaa!” Her laugh was sinister as she placed her face close to his, scrunching her eyes in faux confusion as he tried backing away from her.

“No? Nothing? Mchht, Demethi! I was wrong about you! I thought this would be fun! But you are truly pathetic.” She picked him up by his neck walking out onto her balcony hanging his body over the side.

“No! Please!” He screamed. Grabbing onto her robe for dear life.

“Please. Please he says.” His body thrashed under the strength of the Panther. Tears streaming from his eyes. “And he’s crying? My God! This is embarrassing for you. I see why that beauty downstairs made you so insecure.”

“Please just let me go.” Shuri raised a brow smiling. “Well if that’s what you want.” Panicked gasps left his lips as Shuri pretended to drop him. “Nononono! GAAHD!” 

“You should be more specific with your requests Michael.” She held him a bit further over the edge. “I’ll tell you what. I’m going to go ahead and take my lady off your hands. You obviously can’t don’t no what you’re doing, so she’s mine now baby boy.”

“I honestly couldn’t have done it without you. All of the odds were in your favor, you had the power to make her never want to see me again. But you were negligent with a prize. Intimidated by her value. You brought her right back to me. And for that….” She pulled him up throwing him to the ground infront of her. “I’ll let you live. You are of no threat to me, and you can watch her be treated like the queen she’ll be.”

“The me before would have thrown you from the balcony, gutted you, and fed you to the lions. But I’m better now. And I’ll admit. I lied. This was fun. Now get out of my house.” Mike scrambled to his feet. Piss staining the front of his pants, bleeding from the side of his head as he rushed past Shuri, while she followed him out. 

“Ikumkaziwam!” A Dora called out as they reached the top of the stairs trying to get Shuri’s attention. “Give me a moment to see him out of my home.”

“Y/n was hit by the bullet my Queen.” Instantly it felt as though the walls started to close in on her. Everything started to move in slow motion. The front doors opened and in ran your mother and your sister right as Shuri gave Mike a swift kick causing him to tumble down the stairs

“Where’s my sister?! Where’s my fucking sister?!” Mike reached the bottom of the stairs and Dani was on him immediately. 

“You been putting your hands on my sister nigga! You shot my sister!” She screamed and threw punches to the unconcious man’s face. Your mother tried to pull Dani off of Mike but she was relentless. Shuri snapped out of her shock long enough to get to Dani pulling her off of him. 

“He’s out Dani! He’s gone! Let me take you to your sister!” Dani pulled and tugged against Shuri trying to get herself out of her grip and Shuri let go. Dani snatched away, turning to Shuri placing a finger in her face. 

“Don’t fucking touch me! This shit is on you!” She turned. “Somebody take me to my sister!” A Dora stepped in leading Dani to where you were. 

“FUUUUUUUUCK!!!” Shuri yelled falling to her knees in tears. 

“Pick yourself up little girl.” The voice of your mother came from over top of Shuri.

“I-I’m sorry.” Your mother shook her head. “Danielle is upset and irrational. You have nothing to apologize for. You know that.” Shuri sniffled.

“Yes mama I know.”

She bent to Shuri’s level grabbing her chin. “All you’ve done is love my baby. And you would never cause her harm. That’s why I called you to come get her. I knew you were ready. You’re not here for Dani or anyone else. You’re here for y/n. So get up.. and go be with her.” Shuri nodded standing to her feet. 

Shuri entered the medical area of her lab inside of the house. She’d thrown on some sweats and a tshirt and rushed to your side. Bruno, your mom, and sister all surrounded you as She approached, seeing you lying unresponsive an open wound to your belly. “I’m sooo sorry sthandwa. I’m going to make this right. I promise.” She whispered standing over you, a sob breaking from her lips.

“Oh yea? And how do you plan on doing that?” Your sister glared at Shuri across from her. “Dani, now isn't the time for this.” Your mother interjects. “Then when is the time!? She shouldn't be here! Standing here acting hurt like she didn't cause my sister just as much pain as Mike did! It may not have shown up physically but you did just as much if not more damage and you couldn't fix that. So just how the fuck do you think you’re gonna fix this your highness!”

Your mother opened her mouth prepared to intervene, only to be interupted by Shuri. “Dani, I’m aware of what I did. I’ve received my karma everyday i had to wake up with her not next to me. I don't want any trouble. Your sister has forgiven me. And I hope in time you can too. Because I’m not going anywhere.”

The room was silenced. The Queen had spoken. She held onto your hand. Leaning down to whisper in your ear.

“It’s time to get up baby. This isn’t where our story ends.”

It was approaching midnight in Wakanda as Shuri stood outside of the river tribes village. People lined the streets dancing and chanting holding there sage and torches. Her eyes were misty, as Nakia, Toussaint, Okoye, and M’Baku stood steps behind her in support

“Usisi, they are ready for you.” Nakia says placing an encouraging hand onto Shuri’s back.

Shuri walked forward, watching her people celebrate the woman she loved. Tears finally fell as she thought back on all the time she’d wasted. The years the two of you could’ve spent had she not hurt you. The memories lost. You had always been a beckon of light for her, even when she couldn’t be near you. Your mere existence had brung her hope. Whether you knew it or not, you were the reason for the difference Shuri had made in the world. You’d made an immutable change in her life and she would forever be grateful. As Shuri reached the end of the alter she was met with the Elders.

“Ikumkazi wam, come.” The Merchant tribe elder stepped forward beckoning Shuri to her.

Shuri stepped forward and turned towards the crowd. 

“Citizens of Wakanda, I Elder of the merchant tribe present to you Queen Shuri Udaku the Black Panther.”

Shuri gave her warriors salute and kneeled before the crowd. Their arms crossed over there chests in Salute to their Queen. The elder stepped aside, welcoming you and your family as you stepped forward in your traditional Wakandan garb.

“Heavy is the head that wears the crown.”The elder speaks up. “Tomorrow you will bare that weight, once conjoined  with our beloved Queen and Panther. Today her shoulders are strong, mighty. As a gracious gift from bast runs through her veins. But she will not always carry the strength of the Black Panther. Tonight we test your willingness to bare the weight with your lover.”

Another elder steps forward handing you a wooden bowl with a deep iridescent purple liquid. 

“Now my dear you will place this to your loves lips and strip away the powers of the Black Panther.” Slowly you walk up to Shuri who gave you a reassuring smile.

“Will it hurt?” You say concern filling your voice. Shuri looks up to you.

“My love, you don’t need to be concerned for me. I will be fine.” She reaches out squeezing your hand reassuringly. 

With that, you place the liquid to her lips and she sips. 

It immediately takes effects, veins poping from her forehead and neck, her teeth clenching, and brows furrowing. The people closed their eyes bouncing their shoulders to beat of the drums as Shuri groans in agony. As fast as it started it was over. She gave herself a second and stood to her feet, as the girl you met in your dorm several years ago. She’d grown her hair back. Once again rocking the curly top that you loved so dearly. Love filled her gaze as she took your hand. This was who you loved Not the Queen of Wakanda, not the Black Panther just Shuri. 

She led you forward as the dancing and chanting began to start again your families combining behind you as she led you to the river. The two of you stopped at the edge the water, it tickling the tips of your toes before you turn your heads locking eyes adoringly before Shuri nods her head in reassurance. Together the two of you step into the water submerging yourselves in the blessed water. 

People came, baring gifts of fruits and herbs to anoint your union as the full moon reached its peak. The Elders reached their hands out to you praying for the success of your marriage and reign as Queens of Wakanda.

You leaned forward, foreheads touching as Shuri’s hands snaked around your waist, your arms wrapped around her neck. And you heard her sniffles.

“They’re here Shuri. They’re watching. And they are proud.” She lifted her head allowing herself to be proud.

“I’m so exited to live the rest of my life with you bambo’lwami.” Your smile gave the moon a run for its money. 

“I’m so glad you said yes.”

Shuri believed in the green light, the orgasmic future that year by year recedes before us. It eluded us then, but that's no matter- tomorrow we will run faster, stretch out our arms farther ... So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past.

[somethingswift19]

Who? JJ Maybank x Tattooed (f) Reader

| Warnings: mentions of abuse, swearing, over protective JJ (mildly), alternative reader

| Summary: JJ noticed your medusa tattoo for the first time. All characters are in their 20s in this

| (a/n): I don't know how I feel about this ending. But I hope y'all enjoy!

You weren't like the others on Kildare Island. Technically you were a kook like Kie, but also like Kie you were a pouge through and through. Your dad was ex military and now worked for the local prison while your mom owned the only tattoo shop in the county. Due to this, your family tended to stand out which also meant you lacked in the friends department. That was until you met Kiara.

You and Kie had been inseparable since you met at the kook academy your freshman year. Neither of you wanted to be there but were forced by your mothers to attend. For her 16th birthday present, the two of you even got matching dolphin tattoos. Then when Sarah came along it became the three of you.

This led you to now. You were a 23 year old bartender at The Wreck, Kie's family restaurant, and the two of you had just gotten off shift. Running to the back you threw on your black "I <3 Hot Dads" hoodie, jean shorts, and red high top vans before throwing your messy, curly hair up into a bun. "Hey (y/n), are you ready?" your best friend yelled from the doorway.

"Yeah I'm coming!" grabbing your backpack, you followed her out. You had plans to meet the boys at the beach for a bonfire tonight after work. You had only met them a few times, and all of said times a certain blonde had caught your attention. Getting in the car you got settled but Kie didn't stop staring. "Can I help you?" you laughed.

"Oh no. Just wondering if you were gonna spend the whole night drooling over JJ again and not make a move like last time," she shrugged. Rolling your eyes you told her to just go.

Grabbing the beer out of the back, the two of you made your way towards the beach. "Hey girlies!" the familiar voice of Sarah Cameron rang out. "We were beginning to wonder when the two of you were showing up!"

"Blame the one who had to get ready before we came here," Kiara side eyed you before all three of you began to laugh.

"Listen! Is it a crime to want to look half way decent for my two besties other friends? I mean gotta make a good impression right?" you continued laughing.

"Yeah right. I'm sure it had nothing to do with the fact that JJ is here tonight," Sarah teased you causing you to lightly hit her in the arm as the three of you headed down to the sand. After reaching the firepit you got settled onto the soft sand sitting crisscross applesauce. "Where's Pope?"

"He had homework for his fancy college program," the blonde boy you had been looking forward to seeing all night responded as he sat down next to you and handed you a beer. Nodding your head you took a swig out of the bottle you had been handed. The other three in the group were busy talking about something Sarah's brother did when JJ leaned over and broke the silence between the two of you. "Don't take this the wrong way, but you don't look like anyone I've ever seen around here." You gave him a funny look before he quickly added, "Like it's a good thing! It's cute! Just very different!"

A blush formed on your freckled cheeks, "Thank you...I Think." He was right though. You had long curly black hair with tiny bits of green throughout, both sides of your nose pierced along with your septum, and both ears pierced all the way up. Not to mention the tattoos. Yet you still had a sweetness or "innocence" to you.

"You're welcome!" he smiled proudly to himself for causing the pink tinge. "Now tell me about your tattoos!"

"Well what do you wanna know?" You inquired. The two of you being so wrapped up in your own conversation to realize the other three had left you two alone.

"Well for starters, how many do you have?" genuine curiosity was shown on his face. You fascinated him. "I mean I can see you have your traditional patchwork leg done here, but do you have any more?"

"Well," you began. "I have my leg sleeve (of course), then I also have a full arm sleeve, and one down my side. And then a secret one that matches Sarah and Kie's." you smirked before beginning to giggle when he looked astonished.

"We are gonna circle back to the mystery tattoos later!" the blonde boy exclaimed. "But can I see your sleeve?" You nodded with a hint of reluctance only because of one tattoo. You took off your hoodie so you were only in your tank top. JJ began examining all of the colorful pieces you had but quickly stopped when he saw the medusa adorning your upper arm. His face went from curious and playful to stern. "Who?"

"It's really not important," fixated on the fire you really were hoping to not have this conversation yet. You were always cold but the hoodies also helped keep that hidden.

"You can talk to me," his blue eyes softened. He didn't want to push you but wanted to at least offer. "My dad...he used to beat the shit out of me. I used to blame myself. Would convince myself that I deserved it somehow. My fiends helped snap me out of that."

The two of you sat there in silence for several minutes before you brought yourself to open up, "It was my ex. He had a hard time taking no for an answer." JJ didn't say anything but just let you confide in him. "But before that, I went through something similar to you. My dad was an angry guy. I remember showing up to school with black eyes and having to have my friends cover for me. Then when I was 16, things got particularly bad. He slapped me so hard I fell down and he stormed out. Said 'He should have left me and my bitch of a mom a long time ago'...he came back the next morning in tears and never laid a hand on me since. So then when my ex did what he did, it just brought out suppressed memories."

JJ immediately brought you into a hug while wiping a tear off your cheek, "I am so sorry." You looked up into his beautiful baby blue eyes when the two of you leaned in. He kissed you so gently and tasted so sweet you thought you were in heaven. That was until he whispered onto your lips "So what are these secret tattoos the three of you girls share?" Laughing you buried your face into his chest.

"It's so embarrassing," you blushed as he started to chuckle right when the other three showed back up from what looked like swimming. "Oh! Just in time! (y/n) here was just about to enlighten me on these secret tattoos of yours!"

"Don't do it!" and "She was not!" were said in unison by other two.

"Come on guys we should tell them," you smiled and you all three agreed. "Ok, so just know the three of this did this to celebrate graduating high school. We were young and dumb."

"Oh this is gonna be good," John B mumbled.

"We all have a different fruit," Sarah continued.

"On each of our asses," Kiara finished. The two boys burst out laughing.

"Are you being for real?" John B asked. "I mean I knew about yours Sarah, but all three of you?" he couldn't hold back the laughter anymore.

JJ leaned over and whispered just to you, "I can't wait to see what yours is." Causing you to once again turn bright red. You knew you were in trouble with this boy when he just smirked down and kissed you again saying, "You're too damn cute when you blush like that."

[hlficlibrary]

HL Fic Library 🌲 Stuck in a Cabin Fics

Remember to leave kudos and a comment on the fics you enjoyed to show your appreciation! You can find the library's other recs here.

🌲 Snow by Septic_Styles {M, 70k}

The snow was packed high, completely covering the doorway. Louis reached out to touch it but Harry pulled his arm back in.

"What are you doing?" he hissed.

"It's snow, Harry, not some creature from Mars." Louis rolled his eyes and pressed his index finger to it. It wasn't soft, it was firm and had an almost crunchy texture like the freezing temperature had turned it into ice as the night passed on. It had been sitting there for some time. "Yeah, just as I suspected," Louis said, closing the front door.

"What?"

"We're fucked."

Louis is set to travel thirteen hours up the country to stay with his family at a holiday rental in Edinburgh for Christmas, but when he makes an overnight stop at his cabin in the woods in the Lake District, an unexpected, unlikely face - which Louis has spent all of his teenager and most of his adult years resenting - comes knocking, seeking for help.

Little did they know that the heaviest snowfall England had ever seen would snow the two foes in for a week...

🌲 To the Ends of the Earth by stylinsoncity / @aliensingucci {M, 68k}

During a yearlong hiatus, Louis visits Harry at his cabin in Idaho, where long-buried feelings ignite like the fire keeping them warm.

🌲Take on Me by @haztobegood {E, 60k}

Actor Harry Styles is preparing for his next leadi ng role as Antonius the Gladiator with the help of Louis Tomlinson, Hollywood’s top stunt coordinator. When the demands of Harry’s career get in the way of their training, the pair head to a secluded cabin to complete their training. Then, Louis begins to share senses with Harry. What is causing this mysterious connection and can Louis and Harry figure out how to stop it before they leave the cabin?

🌲 Warming Up to You by @youreyesonlarry {E, 56k}

“I feel you,” Harry nods along as he zips his bag open, carefully pulling out his fancy looking camera before pressing a button to turn it on. “I love taking pictures for a number of reasons, but I think the best part of the whole thing is that I’m able to go through my older pictures and have all these memories from those moments come back to me.”

He puts the camera against his eye and points at Louis, and before the shorter one can even react, he hears a ‘click’, and Harry’s smiling down at the screen of his camera.

“And I don't think I want to forget about the day I got stranded in a cabin with a pretty stranger,” he finishes off.

Prompt 111: Louis and Harry are strangers that somehow got stranded during a blizzard. They find themselves in an abandoned cabin and have to cuddle for warmth. Cuddling leads to much more.

🌲 Cabin Fever by @germericangirl {E, 46k}

“What the fuck is he doing here?“ He asked still looking at him, before he turned back to look at Niall for an answer.

Niall’s mouth fell open and he looked at him with wide eyes "He um changed his mind?“

Harry stared at Niall for a few seconds in silence, before grabbing a bag and walking towards a bedroom without looking at anyone else, slamming the door shut behind himself.

Liam flinched in front of Louis.

“Well I’m happy to see you too.“ Louis mumbled, some of the tension leaving his body. This wasn’t exactly how he thought their first meeting would go. It was quiet for a moment before Louis finally spoke up “Did you seriously not tell him I was coming?“

Or: One cabin, one bed, two ex-boyfriends. What could possibly go wrong?

🌲 Snow Job by @duchesskitty16 {E, 42k}

Harry is a world famous rock star who is closeted and never gives interviews. Louis is a failed novelist and reporter for a gossip magazine that has fallen on hard times. Louis is promised a promotion if he can get the ultimate get - an interview with Harry Styles. Louis finds out that Harry has a mountain cabin near where his friends Zayn and Niall live and heads up to try and meet him. In a twist of fate, Louis has an accident and Harry saves him. Will Louis get his story, or will the fact that he's falling in love change things? Will Harry forgive him when he finds out Louis is lying to him? Will Harry find the courage to come out of the closet and finally be happy?

🌲 too much, but it’s enough by @ohpleaselarry {E, 40k}

There are about a thousand things Louis wishes he could go back in time and fix. A thousand things, and nearly all of them include Harry.

There are the more simple things, like showing him more support, telling him it’s okay to be himself, gently reminding him that a condom in his pocket is rather obvious in skinny jeans, but if he could just choose one thing, just one to change, he’d probably just have told the lad he loves him.

Always has. And always will.

🌲 Something As Simple As This by frenchkiss {E, 34k}

Trapped in a cabin in the middle of nowhere after a blizzard derails Louis from getting home, he and the attractive stranger who owns the place have nothing to do but... well, each other. It would be a real shame if feelings got in the way, and even more of a shame if a secret about this stranger's identity turned both their lives upside down and inside out.

🌲 Etched in Salt (is a cathedral of the world) by @helloamhere {E, 24k}

Louis asks for very few things in life, and they are: to solve cases, to keep bad people from doing their bad things, to get good coffee, to go home to a spacious apartment with nobody else in it, and to manage his stupid telempathy powers with minimal interference. And now he's stuck in a tiny cabin in a snowstorm in the middle of god-awful-nowhere with Harry Styles. Because of course he is.

🌲 you’re the habit that i can’t break by @ohpleaselarry {NR, 24k}

The boys decide to have a belated band reunion, just the five of them. One week, one cabin in the mountains, five boys.

Harry and Louis haven’t spoken sober in a year.

🌲 An Aurora Grove Christmas by @dandelionfairies {T, 17k}

Harry gets lost on his way to St. Louis. The roads are horrid because of the snow and he ends up spinning into a ditch. Lucky for him, he finds a cabin nearby, as well as a cute blue-eyed man who immediately helps him. Unfortunately, his car is stuck for the night, but at least he has a place to stay with Louis. With the snow continuing to fall and another storm front coming through, will he ever make it out of Aurora Grove? Does he even want to?

🌲 The fic where Harry calls Louis an idiot for ten days straight because he is one. by @mercurial-madhouse {M, 16k}

They’ve found the perfect get away from their busy lives as nationally-famous footie player and well-respected restaurant critic, escaping to the isolation of a cabin in the woods where they can simply be Louis and Harry.

If only both were actually here.

A gift forgotten in London, the untameable force of the weather, and the scent of burnt snickerdoodle biscuits find Harry and Clifford pitifully alone and Louis... Where is Louis?

🌲 Darling, Just Hold My Hand by likelarry {E, 10k}

Louis and Harry decide to spend a week at a skii resort with their families during the Christmas holidays.

On Christmas night, Harry goes into labor but the family gets snowed in which forces him to give birth in the cabin in the middle of nowhere.

Luckily, his husband is a surgeon who can help.

🌲 heaps of blankets by gemma {E, 7k}

You know when you and the one you love go for a not-so-adventurous adventure? And you do everything that's crazy, everything you want and just enjoy each other's company? That's Harry's plan when he rents a cabin at a resort in the mountains for him and Louis.

🌲 Orchids by talasArchivesx / @talasarchive {M, 7k}

“Do you find me sensible yet?” Twenty-two letters and six words, yet it lingers on Louis’ mind like an old song playing from a worn cassette. Such a memory holds so much significance it visits Louis’ mind every unsuspecting moment.

The words are a dreamy reminder of such precious seconds of his life.

A story about losing against the drifting tide, and finally coming home; featuring a cabin, winter blizzard and “one bed”.

🌲 Let It Snow by @jaerie {E, 6k}

With a blizzard approaching, Louis planned to spend his birthday with a drink and a good book. In his self exile at his remote cabin, he never expected a poorly dressed stranger to show up shivering and covered in snow. He also didn’t expect to have one of his best birthdays on record.

🌲 wish i knew how to break this spell by eleadore {E, 6k}

Maybe it should be more of a surprise to open the door and find Harry wrapped up in about a dozen blankets, face pink from the cold and soft from sleep. It isn’t.

Harry, Louis, and a cabin. It's cold outside.

🌲 Strange Trails by bananazine {G, 4k}

After one of Harry Style's third-years lost their favourite hat on a class hike, Harry goes back the next day to retrieve it. To his demise, a downpour of rain strikes, forcing him to search for shelter. He runs without a stop towards the nearest clearing and his prayers get answered when he sees an old hunting cabin. With trepidation slowing his steps, he finally makes it towards the presumably vacant cabin. Though, to be polite, he knocks, only to be faced by the bluest eyes he has ever seen.

🌲 (not) driving home for christmas by BeautifulWisdom / @justanotherghostblr {T, 3k}

Spending the holidays alone at his cabin, driving through a snowstorm Harry hits an animal. He takes the large dog back to his cabin to see if he can keep it alive until the storm breaks and he can get to a vet. Colour him surprised and woefully unprepared when said dog turns into a very bloody and very naked man.

[imaginespazzi]

Part 1: Don't Be A Stranger

Masterlist - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5

But if (my) world was ending, you'd come over right?

(In which UCLA anon's roman empire became this writer's roman empire and we've finally reached the beginning)

Pairing: Paige Bueckers X Azzi Fudd

Themes: Angst, Pining, Hurt/Comfort and a little bit of Fluff

Words: 8.4 K (other parts will be shorter....maybe)

TW: Swearing, Alcohol, Injuries, Alludes to Sexual Content

A/N: Hello my lovelies <3 Gonna keep this as short and sweet as possible but we've finally, finally gotten to the UCLA fic. A huge shout out to UCLA anon, because this is their master idea. Couple of things, I've never been to LA or UCLA and therefore some things are out of whack. The timeline is also a little out of whack but I swear I will try to keep it as consistent as possible. In the mean time, just ignore some of the inconsistencies pretty please. As always, feel free to let me know what's bad, what's good and what else you'd like to see. I hope y'all enjoy this first part and let's get another W today!

August 2021

where are you 

i literally have to be at the airport in an hour paige where are you 

dude 

are you on your way?

you better be driving and that’s why you’re not answering 

PAIGE

i’m sorry about last night i shouldn’t have said that 

but you said a lot of shit too so call it even?

this isn’t funny where are you?

i have to leave in 15 mins 

are you actually not coming?

wtf????

this is actually bullshit

get over yourself bueckers 

wow 

fuck you

just landed 

thought you might like to know 

sorry my plane didn’t crash i guess 

September 2021

dude enough okay 

can you just call me back??

i just wanna talk 

i know you're mad i get it but i miss you   

November 2021 

hi i’mma be in dc over christmas

nvm 

idk why i’m trying again  

maybe i should block you 

this is kinda pathetic of me what the fuck 

December 2021

i thought i saw you today but idk

couldn’t have been you cause if it was 

would you really not even say hi?

i’m done trying paige 

merry christmas i guess

March 2022 

i misz you 

lyke a wot

love uuuuu pppppp

even if ur a bwtich 

pkese pick up 

ignore that 

people drunk text exes apparently i drunk text you 

wait 

i don’t need to tell you that 

you already ignore it all anyways

 

August 2022 

i heard about the acl 

i’m sorry 

idk if it means anything, but if you wanna talk

nvm 

***

September 2022 

When the doorbell rings, on a quiet Thursday afternoon during a rare moment of alone time, Paige expects it to be a lot of people. One of her parents deciding that they actually weren’t going to leave her alone. Someone else in her family showing up out of the blue to provide comfort. Maybe one of her teammates popping up to keep her entertained. She even thinks it might be some random fan who got too invested and figured out the address for her air BnB. It’s the saddest testament to how broken they are, that the idea of it being Azzi Fudd standing outside her door, never once crosses her mind. But there she is, when Paige opens the door, dressed in ripped jean shorts and a light blue tank top, the girl that had been her best friend, and maybe a little bit more. 

Silence stretches between them as Azzi fidgets with her hands and Paige continues to stoically stare at her. It’s been almost a year since they’ve seen each other, even longer since they’d last shared a happy smile. And you’d have to go back to before she’d told her about her future plans, to find the last time Azzi had properly looked Paige in the eyes.  

“Hi,” Azzi says finally, mustering up a small smile. Paige doesn’t know if hearing that voice, soft and subdued but still so familiar, fixes a crack or breaks her heart even further. She wills herself to be polite in response, to match Azzi’s polite greeting with a greeting of her own. But there’s clear discord between her mouth and her head, because her words are harsh and hollowed. 

“What are you doing here?”

Azzi swallows, smile disappearing as she immediately digs her fingernails into her palms and Paige feels the guilt settle into her stomach. It’s like the night before all over again. If she closes her eyes, Paige can still hear her voice loudly echoing in Azzi’s childhood bedroom. She can hear the angry words that she’d hurled at her best friend, each one like a well-aimed arrow piercing the other’s girl's heart and tearing into Paige’s own soul. Some would call what she’d done self-preservation. She’d call it her biggest mistake. 

“I um-,” Azzi sucks in her bottom lip, “I was in the area and thought, maybe I’d check in.”

“How did you even know where I was?” Paige hates how cold and accusatory her voice sounds. It’s a version of herself she doesn’t quite know how to deal with, one that hasn’t ever appeared for anyone other than the girl in front of her, “I know I didn’t tell you.”

Any semblance of calm is gone from Azzi’s face, as she seems to realise that she’s not going to be getting any cordiality from her old friend. 

 “And we’re off to a great start,” she mutters under her breath before replying to Paige’s exact question, “no you didn’t. Your dad-”

“You talked to my dad?”

“Yeah. I mean you know Drew looks up to Jon and José so much and they still talk and stuff and he came over- Drew I mean- and then your dad was there and we just got to talking and you came up and yeah. He told me and well I live here, kinda, so I thought- well I thought maybe you’d like some company?”

As Azzi’s rambling explanation comes to an end, Paige doesn’t miss the tinge of hopefulness in her voice at the last bit. The younger girl shuffles her feet, as she stares at the blonde expectantly. 

“I don’t-” Paige struggles to draw in a breath as the voices in her head argue, “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

Her words are met with silence as Azzi stares at her blankly. 

“I- you,” she blinks rapidly, clearly at a loss for what to say at the blatant rejection, “I can’t come in?”

“It’s just- I’ve had a lot of people visit you know,” Paige bullshits, suddenly feeling very exhausted, “and my family were here a couple days and my friends are coming soon and-”

“And I’m neither of those things,” Azzi says, her tone low and breathy. 

“That’s not what-”

“It is,” Azzi closes her eyes for a brief second, when she opens them, the flash of hurt in them feels like a dagger through Paige’s chest, “it is like that and it is what you meant and it’s- it’s fine.”

“Az-” Paige chokes out, feeling her lungs collapse when the other girl moves to leave, “please,” and she’s not even sure she’s asking for, but it’s not this. It’s never been this.

Azzi stops and when she turns back around, there’s a determined look on her face.

“I just-” she rubs her face, composing herself before focusing her eyes on Paige, “you’re the strongest person I know. And you’re going to come back from this, better than ever. I know it. The whole world knows it. Because you’re Paige Bueckers. You’re something else.  You’re the hardest worker, you’re just- you’re the best.”

“You don’t-”

“Just- just let me finish okay and then, then I’ll go or whatever but Paige, you’re all of those things you know? Strong, brave, the best fucking player- but, it’s also okay if sometimes-, if sometimes you aren’t. It’s okay because this- this is hard, I know it is. So if sometimes you’re not strong or-, or brave- or not feeling like working hard- it’s okay. And if there are moments where you- where you want to give up, that’s okay too. It doesn’t make you- it doesn’t make you any less than what you are. It just makes you human, and it’s okay you know- to be human. It’s okay if- if you hurt and it’s okay if you’re not okay. It’s- it’s okay.”

The two girls stare at each other, eyes shining with tears, as Paige let’s Azzi’s words wash over her. She’s been told a lot of platitudes about her injury, from her coaches to her teammates to her family. And she knows she has plenty of people in her corner, who root for her and who genuinely do believe she’ll have the greatest comeback ever. But the motivational speeches get draining after a while and all she’s wanted to do for the last couple of weeks is wallow. Then she felt guilty about wallowing, that little voice in her head yelling at her to be productive and work on getting back to herself because that’s what everybody expected. Paige hadn’t even realised how badly she needed someone to give her permission to not be okay, not until the only person who’d ever known that part of her, had finally said the words she so desperately needed to hear.

The thing is, when she was younger, Paige used to keep everything bottled inside. She’d always been hyper aware of her privilege and her problems had always just seemed so insignificant in front of her parents’ or her friends. So she’d kept them to herself, trapping herself in a web of her own burdens that sometimes threatened to strangle her. And then she’d met a girl at a USA basketball camp when she was 15, a girl who had gently flicked her fingers and Paige’s walls had fallen like dominoes. She hadn’t even known she was drowning, until Azzi had shown up with a lifeboat.

“I just-,” Azzi breaks Paige out of her trance by breaking the eye contact between them, “I didn’t know if anybody had said that to you yet and I just- I wanted you to hear it.”

In the span of a minute, a thousand and one phrases take birth in Paige’s mind and then die on the tip of her tongue. She opens and closes her mouth, trying to express even one of the myriad of emotions that are swirling like a tornado in her brain. But nothing comes out except a litany of incomprehensible noises. And Azzi seems to find the wrong answer in the silence, giving the blonde a timid nod. 

“Take care of yourself P,” her voice catches on the familiar nickname, as she shoots Paige a sad smile, before beginning to walk away. When Azzi chose UCLA, she’d lit Paige's heart on fire. So, Paige had drowned their friendship. And while all this time Azzi has struggled to breathe, Paige has burned but god, is she so fucking tired of it. 

“Fuck, Azzi wait,” Paige curses, hobbling to catch up to the brunette, who stops with a sigh but doesn’t make a move to return. Stubborn as always, Paige thinks, continuing her way over. When she does catch up, she’s not fully sure what to say and so,  “I uh- I’m out of milk.”

Azzi raises her eyebrows in question, crossing her arms protectively around her chest. 

“I can’t drive,” Paige explains slowly, “or walk obviously.”

Realisation dawns on Azzi’s face, “you’re asking me to drive you to the grocery store?”

“I guess,” Paige shrugs, trying to be nonchalant. 

“Seems like the kind of favour someone asks of their family, or their friends,” Azzi emphasises bitterly, never one to let go of an opportunity for sarcasm. 

Paige flinches, “right, I kinda deserved that one.”

She gets a raised eyebrow in response that very much says “ya think?”

“I’m trying here,” she says quietly, and Azzi’s hard demeanour softens, “I’m raising a white flag Az, calling a truce or whatever but it kinda needs to go both ways.” 

“What do you think me coming here was supposed to be?” the younger girl says exasperatedly, but she’s smiling again. It’s the third one Paige has gotten out of her today, and finally, she smiles back. They look a little foolish, standing in the apartment hallway, cheshire-cat-grinning at each other like idiots, but it feels like something has clicked into place again.  

“I’ll go grab my wallet, you go heat up the car.”

“It’s like 110 degrees dude.”

“Bro shut up, you know what I mean,” Paige huffs and when it makes Azzi laugh, she feels like she’s floating. It’s not as if she hasn’t been happy in a year because won’t you look at that, her world did keep turning after that one decision. But this is different. She feels airy and light, like she could jump off a cliff and fly instead of fall. 

“Well hurry up, I have things to do outside of just being your chauffeur.”

“Poor passenger princess, how the roles have reversed,” Paige mocks and it earns her an ever so familiar fond eye roll and for the first time in a year, she feels free. 

***

When she gets downstairs, Azzi’s leaning against her car door, a pair of sunglasses shielding her eyes. The hot California sun shines brightly against her tan skin, and Paige’s heart stutters because fuck, Azzi is golden. She looks every bit reminiscent of the girl Paige still has memorised and yet, every bit the promise of a girl Paige wants to learn by heart. 

“Nice car,” Paige smirks, alerting the younger girl of her presence.  

“It does the job,” Azzi says, looking up with a smile of her own, opening the passenger door for Paige to get in, “not all of us are raking in NIL deals to get the big guns, but we make do.”

“Steph Curry brand ambassador say what now?” the blonde girl teases as she slides into the car. When she looks up, Azzi’s frozen in place, “what?”

“Nothing I just-” she’s wearing sunglasses, but Paige knows Azzi's trying to avert her gaze, “I’m kinda surprised you know that.”

It’s Paige’s turn to look away, their newfound comfort giving away to that old awkwardness, “I keep up with most basketball news.”

To Azzi’s credit she doesn’t push. Instead, she makes her way into the driver seat without another sound. She’s about to connect her phone to the aux but Paige beats her to it. 

“Hey,” Azzi squeals, making grabby hands, “my car, my rules, my music.”

“Nuh-uh injury privileges,” Paige gloats, sticking out her tongue. 

“That’s not a thing.”

“Is too.”

“Fine, we’ll listen to your crap music.”

“I resent that,” Paige retorts, as Drake blasts through the speakers. The sound of it makes Azzi groan, and she dramatically bangs her head against the steering wheel. Paige spends the rest of the car ride singing at the top of her lungs. Azzi spends the rest of the car ride alternating between shaking her head and joining in with the singing. It’s like they’re back in 2020 all over again, back before they found themselves in the whirlwind of life, back when they were just Paige and Azzi.

*** 

Their trip inside the grocery store takes less time than the ride to get there, even if Paige takes her time dilly-dallying in the dairy section, pretending she’s going to get anything other than just regular milk. She’s overly conscious of the fact that their time together might be coming to an end, that this time she might actually have to deal with saying goodbye. But she’s not ready to go back to missing Azzi just yet. 

“Maybe you can show me your dorm,” she says quietly, once they're both back in the car, playing with the hem of her shirt. Beside her, Azzi draws in a sharp intake of breath, clearly not having expected Paige to want that of all things. In all honesty, the idea of stepping into the world that had stolen Azzi from her is not all that appealing to Paige but she wants to hold onto this moment just a little bit longer. 

“You wanna see my dorm?” 

“A chance to see how the non-blue blood peasants live? I’d never pass it up.”

“Non blue blood,” Azzi scoffs, "Ever heard of John Wooden?”

“I was talking about women’s basketball but yeah I have heard of him. I won the award last year. Over you,” Paige smirks, wiggling her eyebrows. 

“Not everyone’s a phenom their freshman year,” Azzi retorts fondly, unable to mask the hint of pride in her voice. 

“Well we’ll see this year-” Paige stops herself, cold seeping into her lungs, as she remembers why she’s in the stupid state of California in the first place. The lighthearted mood in the car goes tumbling out the window as her words hang like a dagger in the air. 

“Paige,” Azzi whispers, trying to wrap that one syllable in comfort. She reaches out to touch the blonde’s shoulder but must think better of it because her hand hovers mid-air for a second, before she pulls it back. Paige is suddenly hyper aware of the fact they haven’t touched yet. It’s a reminder of the fact that whatever progress they’ve made today, there’s still so much they haven’t even begun to unpack. 

“It’s fine,” Paige’s voice is steely, “just drive.”

Azzi opens and closes her mouth a couple of times, before simply nodding and starting the ignition. She’s clearly holding back and Paige doesn’t know how to feel about it. There’s a part of her that wants Azzi to push her to talk like she would before, but there's another part of her that knows this new rope they’re trying to string between them is fragile. 

They ride in silence to Azzi’s apartment, both of them too caught up in their own thoughts to bother with music this time. As the UCLA campus nears, Paige can’t help but hate it just a little bit. She’s aware she’s being petty. Acting like Storrs, Connecticut is some hub of beauty is probably a stretch of the imagination for anyone but she’s determined to dislike this place out of principle.

“Hmm not too shabby but like where’s the fucking cows?” Paige jokes, as the car comes to a stop in front of Azzi’s apartment building. She steps out gingerly, pretending to inspect her surroundings, making tsk-tsk noises at the most random things. 

“I’ve seen your apartment Bueckers, don’t even try,” Azzi retorts. 

It shouldn’t surprise Paige to see one of Azzi’s teammates when they enter her living room. It’s just like UConn really in the sense that there’s always someone there when you walk in but something about seeing Charisma Osborne just chilling in Azzi’s space suddenly makes it more real that the younger girl is definitely a UCLA Bruin. 

“Oh,” Charisma gives Paige a once-over, clearly not having expected to see her, “hi Paige.”

Paige waves, shuffling her weight on her crutches, unsure what to say. It’s not like she doesn’t know Charisma, they’ve literally won a gold medal together for USA basketball. She’s even met the girl a couple of times after and she likes her, she does. But her bitter brain is focused on the fact that this is one of those girls who had gotten Azzi as their teammate, one of the girls who got to see Azzi everyday. All things Paige had not gotten. 

“You didn’t tell me you were bringing company Az,” Charisma says pointedly, looking at Azzi and Paige bristles at the use of the nickname. She’s being all sorts of ridiculous but at least she’s self-aware of it. 

“Last minute decisions,” Azzi replies airily. The two girls lock eyes and Paige can tell they’re having some sort of unspoken conversation and now the green-eyed envy monster is out in full force. 

“I insisted on seeing her dorm,” she says finally, breaking into whatever staring competition the two UCLA guards are having. 

“It’s not a problem,” Charisma reassures, standing up from her position on the couch, and coming over to give Paige a tentative hug, “I just didn’t know you were coming. But it’s good to see you, Paige.”

“Yeah,” Paige tries to muster up a proper smile as she leans in to return the hug but it comes out more like a grimace, “you too.”

“We’re gonna go chill in my room,” Azzi says, beckoning to one of the doors in the hallways and Paige obediently follows her, waving a half-hearted goodbye to Charisma. She’s secretly pleased to have Azzi back to herself. 

The room is nothing out of the ordinary except it has Azzi all over it. She’s in the pink comforter that is thrown haphazardly over a clearly not made bed. She’s in the unicorn plushies laid delicately over a dark blue couch. She’s in the little flower stickers that outline the mirror on the far side of the room. There’s a wall dedicated solely to pictures and fairy lights on one side and Paige is immediately drawn to it. A familiar ache reverberates in her chest as her eyes flicker over the pictures of Azzi’s family. She’s missed them. Then there’s the photographs of Azzi in her UCLA uniform, her teammates surrounding her and Paige has to resist the dangerous urge to rip those off the wall. Be happy for her happiness, the logical part of her brain yells, not seeming to realise she’d left any chance of that in the dirt a year ago. As she tears her eyes away from those offending pictures, they land instead on a whole other set of photographs and she feels her heart catch in her throat. 

It’s a set of three images of her and Azzi, taken at various moments. Paige brushes her thumb against the one of the two of them with their arms around each other at the Minnesota  state fair. Azzi’s beaming at the camera and Paige is beaming at Azzi. They look so young, so naive, so happy. 

“I’m on your wall,” Paige breathes out, turning to face her best friend, “Fuck, I’m on you wall.”

“Of course you are,” Azzi affirms, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world but she shuffles nervously, giving away the reality behind her stable demeanour. 

“I never answered your texts. I didn’t call you back,” Paige lists quietly as the first tear falls from her eyes; she’s been holding them back all day, “and I’m on your fucking wall.”

Azzi looks away, unsure how to deal with the fact that apparently they’re no longer tip-toeing around the past. She doesn’t know how to tell the blonde that there had never really been a second thought about whether or not those photos were going up on the wall.

“Doesn’t matter,” she shrugs finally, “you’re my best friend. You’re always gonna be my best friend. Ride or die right?”

“Ride or die,” Paige repeats in a whisper before she all but throws herself at Azzi, practically moulding herself into the younger girl’s body. Caught off guard, Azzi stiffens for a second, before relaxing into it. It’s late outside and the sun has set, but in this moment, the world shines the brightest it has in a year as two stubborn girls finally find their way home to each other. 

***

That night, Azzi asks her tentatively if she wants to stay over and of course Paige agrees. Lying awake next to a familiar stranger, she lets herself finally remember the day things had first started unravelling.

November 2020

“You’ll probably get one of the upstairs apartments, so we probably won’t actually be living together which is good because can you imagine if I had to see your goofy ass 24/7?” Paige puts a dramatic hand to her forehead, as she leads Azzi into her room.

She’s too caught up in her excitement having Azzi at UConn, and planning what’ll happen next year, to notice that the girl in question isn’t participating at all in her enthusiasm. Paige has been waiting for what feels like a year (in reality it’s only been a few months) to finally have her best friend come visit. The minute the car had pulled up, she’d taken it upon herself to start her sales pitch all over again, missing the sympathetic smiles she’d gotten from the rest of the Fudd family as she pulled Azzi away to show her the glories of the campus. 

“Did you see my assist to Christyn today?” Paige gloats, falling onto her bed with a smirk. 

“It was pretty great,” Azzi concedes. 

“It was fucking perfect thank you very much. I set her up perfectly, exactly how she likes it.”

“Right.”

“And then did you see how excited the team was for her? For everyone? Never gonna find a greater group of girls.”

“They seem wonderful P.”

Paige furrows her eyebrows as she catches Azzi still lingering by the door instead of joining her on the bed. The brunette fidgets with the sleeve of her sweater, chewing on her lips.

“Are you allergic to my bed?” Paige waits for some smartass response. When she doesn’t get one, she frowns, instincts going haywire, “Az, you good?”

“I- '' Azzi looks away, swallowing nervously, “I need to tell you something and I- I’m not sure how you’re gonna react.” 

“You get a boyfriend or a girlfriend or something in the last few months that I don’t know about?” She says it light-heartedly enough, but the thought of it sends a sharp sting through Paige’s heart. In hindsight, she thinks maybe she could have dealt with it having been that. 

“What? No. Just- just don’t- dont take it personally okay. Like you can be upset about it but- but don’t hold it against me yeah? My parents- they said- they said you’d get it. You’d be upset but you’d- you’d get it because you- you get me right?”

Paige’s chest hammers as she watches the younger girl draw in a deep breath, “you’re scaring the shit out of me right now.”

“I’mcommittingtoUCLA” Azzi says all in one breath, the words blending together. 

She’s sure she’s heard it wrong. There’s no way. After all this time, after all their conversations, all the pitches, how hard she had worked, there was no way this was going to be the end to all of Paige’s efforts. 

“What?” she whispers, crossing her fingers that she has in fact misheard. 

When Azzi averts her eyes, she knows she hasn’t, “I’m committing to UCLA.”

The first time Paige and Azzi met was somewhat awkward, what with Azzi’s shyness and Paige being slightly overeager to make a new friend. When they’d become bus buddies, they’d progressed to being casual acquaintances who could small talk and share smiles. And then the flight back to Minnesota happened and everything had changed. Every moment after was filled with conversation or laughs or a comfortable silence. Until this one, where the sudden silence between them foreshadows an ominous future.

“Say something,” Azzi says finally, her voice shaking. 

Paige stares at her for a second before, “you named your dog Stewie.”

“What?”

“You named your dog Stewie. After Breanna Stewart who played at UConn. It’s not-” Paige wracks her brain, hands flying animatedly “it’s not Meyers or something, after someone who played at fucking UCLA. You named your dog after a UConn great. How are you going to take him to UCLA with you?”

Azzi stares at her, clearly not having expected that level of questioning of all things. Who could blame her when Paige herself feels a little insane. 

“This is a joke right? You’re fucking with me? Ha ha ha very funny,” she claps deliriously,  “hilarious prank seriously, like hats off you’ve outdone yourself but enough okay? Say sike right fucking now.”

Azzi makes a strangled noise, “it’s not a joke Paige. That’s- that’s my decision.”

“Then change it,” Paige yells, catapulting off the bed.

“Paige-”

“Have you told UCLA yet?”

“I wanted to tell my family and you first.”

“Oh wow, how kind of you. How fucking generous of you to do that Azzi,” Paige bites back sarcastically and Azzi flinches. 

In a flash, Paige’s expression goes from angry to desperate, “you still have time to change your mind . Please just- just think about it again okay? You still have so much time and you know what, stay here for a couple more days. Spend time with the team, with the coaches, with me and you’ll see-. UCLA just sounds nice you know? California, the sun, I get it, of course it’s tempting. But just- just stay here okay? And you’ll see this is where you belong,” she leaves the, with me, unsaid. 

“Paige,” Azzi’s voice cracks. She takes a step toward her and then pauses. It’s the first time in a long time that Azzi’s hesitated when it comes to Paige. It won’t be the last. And when she looks at Paige through her long eyelashes, tears threatening to fall from her dark brown eyes, Paige knows she’s lost. 

“No,” she’s pacing now, chest heaving up and down in a combination of frustration, anger and misery, “this is not fucking happening. We’re not doing this. I made you a whole recruitment video. Did you watch it? Do you know how long it took me to make it? Has the last year been a fucking joke to you?”

“Of course not-”

“Don’t even. Because clearly- clearly it has. Must’ve been hilarious watching me beg and plead with you when you already fucking knew you were going to committ somewhere else.”

“That’s not fair,”  Azzi’s voice rises at the accusation, “I had no idea where I was going until a couple of weeks ago. You can’t seriously think that low of me.”

“Not fair? You know what’s not fair, Azzi? We’ve been talking about playing together, about finally being on the same team, the same fucking state, for years. What’s not fair is you throwing all of that away on a whim.”

“I’m not committing to UCLA on a whim. This is my whole future we’re talking about. You don’t even know how much thought I’ve put into it. And I’m choosing what’s best for me. You can’t hold that against me Paige. You can’t.”

They stand on opposite sides of the room, taking in harsh staggered breaths and glaring at each other. The tension in the room is electric as the string connecting them frays. Paige and Azzi bicker, they don’t argue. Or at least, that’s how it used to be. 

“Az?” their stare down is broken by a knock on the door as Katie Fudd lets herself in. Immediately, as she stares between her daughter and the girl who’d become just as important, Katie knows what has happened, “we’re going back to the air BnB, are you staying here?”

The answer should be obvious, like it used to be. Of course she would stay here. It was meant to be a no-brainer. But before Azzi can say that, Paige intervenes and the string snaps. 

“She’s going with you,” the blonde says firmly, before turning her back. She won’t let Azzi see the tears, she won’t. For her part, the brunette stares at Paige’s back silently for a couple of seconds, before a mask of determination slips on. 

“Fine. If that’s what you fucking want,” Azzi sneers before brushing past her mom, eager to get away and hide her own tears. 

When Paige turns back around, Katie is already looking at her. The older woman walks the length of the room and pulls the younger girl into a hug that she readily melts into. Paige sniffles as Azzi’s mom soothingly rubs her back. 

“We’re driving back tomorrow morning,” Katie whispers quietly into Paige’s hair, “I know you’re mad sweetheart but come say goodbye okay?”

And she does. She shows up with only half an hour or so remaining before Azzi leaves, but Paige shows up. They hug stiffly, exchanging maybe a sentence or two but in that moment it’s enough. They’ll call later when Azzi gets home and it’ll be awkward for a little bit but they’ll break through. They’ll figure out a way to go on without having to talk about the “big thing”. They’ll hold on as long as they can, until they can’t anymore. 

***

September 2022

After the night Paige stays over at Azzi’s apartment, they're attached at the hip for the next few weeks, just like old times. They’ve fallen into a routine of sorts. Azzi shows up without fail every day after practice to pick Paige up from her rehab, and then the rest of the younger girl’s time is Paige’s. The first time she’d seen the brunette leaning casually against her car, Paige had had to stop herself from jumping into her arms. She’d played it as nonchalant as possible, joking about Azzi being stalker, but inside, she could feel it again, the dangerously familiar tap of this is all I’ll ever need. 

On days Paige doesn’t have rehab, Azzi still shows up right on time on her doorstep with a board game or food or something.  It’s gotten to the point where every time the doorbell rings, Paige opens it expecting Azzi. The couple times it’s not, she tries and fails to hide the disappointment on her face. It earns her an eye roll from the delivery guy but it’s worth it for the laugh it elicits from Azzi when she tells her the story. They fall back together as if they’d never fallen apart. And what’s more terrifying than finding out that she’d never truly gotten over old Azzi, is realising how easy it would be to fall in love with new Azzi. 

When Caroline, Nika and Piath come to visit the weekend after, all three of them can immediately tell that something's changed. Their teammate seems lighter, as if she’s finally found a sense of calm. But their incessant prodding and raised eyebrows are only met with shrugs from a tight-lipped Paige. It isn’t until Azzi calls, and Nika snatches the phone out of Paige’s hands, gasping at the callerID, that they finally figure out why their point guard has a new kick in her step. 

“You should invite her out with us tonight,” Caroline is the first to speak, giving Paige an encouraging smile. 

“Carol,” Nika hisses, “we can’t just invite the enemy.”

“She’s not the enemy,” Paige defends immediately, “we don’t even have a rivalry with UCLA.”

Nika scoffs indignantly, “of course she is. She picked a different school over us. Over UConn! That’s weird. Who even does that?”

“Lots of people do,” Caroline, who occasionally texts Azzi (albeit she’s kept that somewhat of a secret), supplies helpfully, shrugging when the Croatian glares at her. 

Piath nudges Paige when she notices the other girl has gone quiet, “ignore Nika. She doesn’t mean it, you know that. If you wanna invite her, invite her.” 

And she does, she wants to so badly. It’s insane really because it hasn’t even been a full day since they’d last seen each other but Paige swears something inside her has been missing since. There’s something awfully terrifying about letting Azzi back into the UConn version of her world, the world that the younger girl had once rejected. Still, if they’re going to try this again, she supposes sooner or later, it’ll have to happen. 

“Put her on speaker,” Nika orders when Paige grabs her phone back from her. 

“Nika,” Caroline, younger only by age, warns, pulling the other girl away, “we’re supposed to be cheering her up, not making life harder.”

Azzi answers on the third ring, her voice teasing  “miss me already?”

Yes, Paige thinks, sometimes I think I miss you even when you’re right here next to me, sometimes I think I’ll miss you forever. But she doesn’t say any of that. 

“Not a chance,” she scoffs instead, “besides you called me first.”

“Butt dial.”

“Mmmhmm I’m sure.”

“Shut up,” Azzi laughs and Paige is glad her teammates aren’t here to see the goofy grin that appears on her face at the sound of it, “I just wanted to see if we were doing something tonight?”

“Yeah- umm- you remember I told you about the girls coming down this weekend. They- uh- they wanted to go out tonight and uh- you could come along?” 

There’s a pause on the other end and Paige knows Azzi’s going through the same thought process as her. 

“I don’t wanna intrude on your time with your team P-”

“You wouldn’t be intruding,” Paige cuts in immediately and although she figured her teammates were definitely eavesdropping, Nika cursing about her being “pussywhipped” followed by in-sync shushing from Piath and Caroline, gives them away. 

On the other end of the line, Azzi’s quiet again, “it’s okay P, you go have fun with your friends. We don’t have to spend every night together. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

What she doesn’t say is that maybe they need to learn how to live like that again, how to live apart again. Paige is almost done with the LA part of her rehab, something both of them are still in denial about. It’s only a matter of time before they return back to their two separate worlds and neither of them are sure they’ve managed to repair their friendship enough to not slip back into their foolishness again. 

“But I wanna see you tonight,” Paige whines, her tone teetering on the edge of sounding like a desperate girlfriend, “please.”

“Paige-”

“Pleaseeeeeee. I’m literally injured and begging Az, it’d be mean to say no.”

“What does your injury even have to do with any of this?” Azzi sighs exasperatedly, “but yeah okay fine calm down Bueckers. Send me an address, I’ll be there.”

“You don’t wanna come pregame here?” 

“Dude, let's not push it, okay?”

“Yeah, yeah okay see you,” Paige pauses, “hey Az?”

“Hmm?”

“I’m really happy you’re coming tonight.”

“I’m really happy you’re happy P.”

***

Azzi Fudd is a menace. See, people often get fooled by her soft-spoken nature and shy demeanour, but Paige has been around her long enough to know the truth. In the beginning it was the witty quips the younger girl always had ready whenever they were having some ridiculous argument. After that, it was the direct pranks that wreaked havoc on Paige’s life. But tonight, in Paige’s opinion, tonight is Azzi’s worst offence. She had to have done it on purpose, had to have known the sheer effect it would have on Paige to see her dressed like that. The red criss-cross tank top fits her like a mould and the way her ripped jeans shorts cling to her hips leaves little to the imagination. Her diamond belly button piercing shines against her skin, taunting Paige. She wants to touch, she wants to feel, she wants to do all the unspeakable things in her mind but she’s forced to just watch. 

What she hates most though, is that everybody else is watching too. Since Azzi’s walked into the club, Paige has had to fight the urge to strangle every stranger who had given her best friend an appraising once-over. Some of them let their eyes linger long enough to give her time to plot out the perfect murder strategy (it’s the only way she can stop herself from actually committing a crime tonight). And, as Azzi dances with Caroline, hips swaying to the beat and holding the other girl a little closely, Paige has the irrational urge to hit sweet, kind Caroline of all people. 

The thing is, Azzi’s been a little too attached to Caroline since she got here in Paige’s opinion. And she gets it. Piath, bless her soul, is trying but has always been a little awkward around new people. Nika is definitely not trying, loyally holding onto a grudge on behalf of Paige. Which leaves Caroline, who’s already familiar territory and the younger girl has grasped onto her like a lifeline. But enough is enough Paige decides, as she slips out of her seat with a determined look. Smoothly, she cuts right in between Caroline and Azzi.

“Nika’s a little wasted and I don’t want to deal with,” it’s a blatant lie but Paige knows appealing to Caroline’s more motherly instincts will get her what she wants. She gets a raised eyebrow in return, her teammate clearly catching her ruse because Nika looks visibly fine. But it works anyway and Paige gets Azzi to herself. She reaches for the other girl’s hand, twirling her just so she can hear that stupid silly laugh, and then pulling her back so she’s facing Paige. 

“You having fun?” 

“Always have fun with you P,” Azzi replies. She’s clearly tipsy but there’s no hint of insincerity in her voice. It makes Paige’s breath hitch. 

“Yeah?” she whispers, taking a step closer, “more than with Carol?”

Azzi giggles, “more than anyone.”

The song in the club changes and as the crowd adjusts to it, someone jostles Azzi and immediately Paige grabs at her hips to steady her. As she finds her balance, Azzi’s giggles subside, realising just how close she is to the blonde now. They’re stuck in slow motion as the world dances around them. The combination of adrenaline and alcohol pumping through her veins is what convinces Paige to test the limits. One hand still squeezing at Azzi’s bare waist, revelling in finally getting to touch, she brings up her thumb to trace around Azzi’s lips. The younger girl gulps, but when she doesn’t try to move away, confidence pulses through Paige. Her heart is beating frantically out of her chest, years and years of want and need that she’d shoved as far away as possible, desperately fighting to get to the surface. 

Pushing herself closer, so their chests are now pressed to each other and Azzi’s hands have no choice but to latch onto her biceps, Paige places a delicate, teasing kiss to the corner of Azzi’s lips. She wishes she could record the whine it elicits and listen to it on loop for hours. Smirking, she moves to place another one on the other side, this time pressing her lips a little harder, a little longer. Azzi’s eyes are closed shut, hands gripping onto Paige so tightly, she knows there’ll be a mark on her biceps tomorrow. She cups Azzi’s face with both hands now, her own eyes shutting involuntarily, as she finally, finally brushes their lips together. 

This time, the strangled noise that leaves Azzi’s throat, is one Paige wishes she could forget as the younger girl rips herself away from Paige, the force of it creating almost a foot of distance between them. It doesn’t take long for the familiar sting of rejection to make itself home in her heart. Azzi’s eyes are brimming with tears as she manically shakes her head. Without a word, she rushes through the crowd, making a beeline for the exit, leaving Paige confused and craving for another taste. 

***

It takes Paige a second to gather her thoughts before following the brunette. She ignores the confused glances from her teammates, making some bullshit excuse about fresh air as she fights her way outside. When she gets there, Azzi’s leaning against the wall, eyes closed as she takes in long deep breaths. 

“That’s not usually how girls react when I try to kiss them,” Paige says after a second, trying to make light of the situation, even if her heart is heavy with anxiety. 

It’s the wrong thing to say because Azzi scoffs, “you kiss a lot of girls don’t you.”

“Yeah and most of them kiss me back,” Paige bites back. 

She’s taken aback by the fire in the darker-skinned girl’s eyes as Azzi finally opens them, heaving herself off the wall. 

“I won’t be one of your groupies Paige. I won’t be one of your desperate one night stands. I won’t be just some other hookup. I won’t!”

Frankly she’s a little offended Azzi would even think that of her. She’s aware of her reputation. In fact she’d probably fed into it a little bit, exaggerating her escapades to Azzi on the phone her freshman year, when they had been on the verge of combusing and she’d been desperate to get a rise out of the younger girl. Last year though, last year was different. But Azzi doesn’t know that. 

“I don’t want you to be any of that,” she replies feebly. 

“Then what, do you want me to be?” Azzi’s voice rises with each syllable. 

Paige stutters, the words getting stuck in her throat. The truth is she wants Azzi to be everything. The truth is, Azzi already is everything. Except there’s too much between them and she just can’t say it. They stand in silence until Azzi finally breaks it.

“I think these last few weeks of summer might have been the best of my life,” she says miserably, “and that might be the worst thing ever you know? Because it’s not real. You’re gonna go back to your world and you’ll- you’ll stop replying to my texts and you’ll stop- you’ll stop calling me and I- I don’t know if I can do that again.”

“That’s an awful lot of assumptions you’re making about me,” Paige is on defensive mode now, feeling a fight brewing. 

“Because that’s what happened. Go back through your fucking phone Paige. Look at all the times I tried. And all the times you never did. You just- you cut me out Paige.”

“That’s not fair. You chose fucking UCLA. Over me.”

“No,” Azzi corrects immediately, anger seeping into her tone, “I chose UCLA over UConn. You made it about yourself.”

Paige swallows back a bitter response in favour of trying to prevent a full-fledged argument, “okay, okay let’s not- let’s not do this okay. It’ll be better this time- I- I won’t ignore your calls or texts or you okay? Just- can we just go back inside please?”

“That’s the thing,” Azzi’s anger is gone, replaced by a sad wistful smile, “I don’t know if I believe that you will,” a single tear rolls down her cheek, “I- I don’t fully trust you and you haven’t fully forgiven me. So where do we go from here?”

It’s a lie what they say about the truth setting you free, Paige thinks as Azzi’s words squeeze at her heart, because all it’s done is unleash shackles of despair that holds them both hostage. It had been easy the last couple of weeks, to pretend the last year had never happened. It had been easy for Paige to pretend that she was over what happened, to ignore the part of her brain that still felt so utterly betrayed. 

“Azzi, what are you saying? You don’t- you don’t wanna be friends?” Paige feels nauseous even saying it. 

“No I-” Azzi chews at her bottom lip, “I’m saying this- us- we’re too fragile to complicate even more. I barely- fuck- Paige, I barely survived losing my best friend. I don’t think I could survive losing something more.” 

The worst thing about it all, is that it makes sense. And really, Paige doesn’t know what she’d expected to happen if Azzi hadn’t pulled away when she did. They’d kiss, maybe give in and do more and then what? Shake hands and walk away? Or make false promises that would ultimately lead to resentment? No, Years and years of something deserved better than either of those masochistic endings. It makes sense, it does but it doesn’t mean Paige has to like it. 

In front of her, all the fight evaporates from Azzi’s body, as the younger girl leans back against the brick wall of the club, sliding down and pulling her knees to her chest. She looks every bit as miserable as Paige feels and all the blonde wants to do is wipe away the stress lines creasing against the younger girl’s beautiful phase. She moves to sit down next to her best friend, shuffling so their shoulders are pressed together and intertwines their fingers together. A sigh of relief escapes her when Azzi doesn’t immediately pull away. Instead, she squeezes their hands tighter, as if she’s scared that if she lets go, Paige will disappear. 

“You didn’t lose me you know,” Paige says softly after a second, nudging Azzi’s shoulder when the other girl lets out a noise of protest, “I know, I know it feels like you did. It felt like that to me too except- every time something good or bad happened to me, I heard your voice or- or maybe I just really wanted too. We got lost a little bit but I didn’t- I didn’t lose you and you didn’t lose me. There’s a difference. I don’t think we could ever lose each other like that. Not really.”

When Azzi turns to look at her, the golden glow of the street lights illuminate the emotions in her eyes. She gives Paige a soft smile, “well Bueckers, if basketball doesn’t work out, maybe you have a future in poetry.”

“I could do whatever I wanted,” except what I want to do the most. 

It doesn’t take long for the Uber Azzi’s already called to start pulling up and that familiar ache of longing creeps into Paige’s spine. She knows tonight isn’t their final goodbye; they still have a couple more days. But those days will be spent ignoring and pretending, unlike tonight and the firm grip they have on reality. They rise off of the cold pavement together, dusting themselves off. It takes a second of awkward glances before they’re surging into each other’s arms, squeezing each other so tightly that it’s hard to breathe. Paige wills herself not to cry, hiding her face in the crook of Azzi’s neck. 

“We’ll be okay,” she whispers, unsure if it’s more for her benefit or Azzi’s. 

The unwanted beep of a car is the only reason they reluctantly pull away, hurriedly wiping away unshed tears, they pretend the other can’t see. Azzi musters up a brave smile, before slowly moving away and it takes everything in Paige not to crumble and begs her to stay. Azzi’s halfway to the car when she turns back and it feels like Paige can breathe again. The brunette’s face is conflicted for a second before turning determined, as she starts walking back up. 

“Az-”

Paige’s confusion is stifled as Azzi fists her shirt, pulling her into a searing kiss. It’s desperate and needy and it’s only a few seconds before the dark-haired girl is pulling away again, but it sets Paige’s entire world off balance. 

“I just-” Azzi’s breathing is rapid and uneven, “I’ve wanted to do that since I was fifteen and- just- fuck- I just-,” she blinks up at Paige, “I hate- I hate leaving things unfinished and for fucks sake if you don’t call me back this time Bueckers- just- don’t be a stranger.”

Paige doesn’t get time to answer, she doesn’t think she could even if she did, because Azzi scurries away almost immediately. She stops when she gets to the car, turning back to give Paige one final look, a look that will haunt Paige forever, before getting into the backseat. As Paige watches the back of Azzi’s uber gets smaller and smaller, her tongue darts across her lips as she tries to memorise the faintest taste of Azzi’s strawberry-flavoured lipstick. And she knows, she’s so utterly and completely and terribly fucked.

[margareth-lv]

🏳️‍🌈 Every girl needs a gay best friend 🏳️‍🌈

Last week, I wrote a post here about the morbid shyness of a certain music manager.

My text was based on an interview Caitríona gave in mid-February 2018, shortly after her so-called 'engagement' and after she'd just won the Irish IFTA for her work on Outlander.

In the interview, Caitríona talked about how she met her fake fiancé. In the February 2018 version, Caitríona met her PA through one of her best friends.

So I decided to look into the subject of this "best friend" who brought the unfortunate music manager to Caitriona.

What I'm going to write today is, I think, 100% obvious to veterans of the fandom. But for those just starting out, I hope it'll be news. And I, well, I'm somewhere in the middle, between newbie status and more than three years of wading through the facts and the myths.

For me, the fun part has been reconstructing the chronology of events. The dates are interesting.

*** *** ***

The beginning of my story is quite surprising. Because we reach Caitríona's 'best friend' by clicking on a link in an article published in 'People Magazine' on 15 August 2019.

The article is entitled: 'Everything to Know About Caitriona Balfe's Super Private Relationship with Husband Tony McGill' and it tells us that: 'the couple tied the knot in England last weekend'.

😱

What excellent investigative journalists People Magazine have (bravo, bravo!), that in a twelve sentence article they could link to a post from Donal Brophy's Instagram.

👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

And look at this description:

"It’s unclear exactly when Balfe and McGill started dating, but the earliest evidence of their romance dates back to 2015, when a friend posted a video of her sitting on his lap at a bar in Ireland on Instagram. (McGill was not tagged and does not appear to have any social media accounts of his own.)"

🤯

Isn't that brilliant work from Starz/TPTB/whatever's PR Dept?

*** **** *** From the above it seems fair to conclude that the 'best friend' who brought Caitriona bad luck in the form of an unfulfilling music manager was Donal Brophy, because who else could it be?

*** *** ***

And now, let's take a quick look at the Instagram post (dated 1 January 2015) linked to the 'People Magazine' article. We all know it, of course! Here is the irrefutable proof of the passion between our two lovebirds: the rhythmic (and how sexy!) patting on the hip.

🥱

Well, hip-slapping is boring (and not at all sexy).

Far less boring, however, is the look on the music manager's face, the look that seeks Donal's approval (tell me I'm patting her well, do tell!). Could it be that, like the People Magazine link, this video was made to show? I wouldn't rule it out.

*** *** *** Now let's talk about dates: the sexy (not 🤢) slap on the hip was posted by Donal with a date of 1 January 2015, but two days earlier, on 30 December 2014, Donal shared another photo on Instagram featuring both the hapless music manager and Caitríona. ⬇️⬇️⬇️

Perhaps the decidedly less seductive and sensual appearance of the 'fiancée' in the December photo was the deciding factor in "People Magazine" not publishing a link to it?

Who could know?

*** *** ***

It certainly wasn't love at first sight. The new boyfriend seems rather tired of Caitriona's presence. 😉

I know this is a mischievous conclusion. I am so, so sorry, my friends.

❓

But one thing is for sure: Donal is an old friend of Caitríona.

I haven't done too much in-depth research, but the oldest photo I've been able to find of both Caitríona and Donal is… a photo in a Flickr album belonging to Caitríona's ex-boyfriend, Dave Milone. The photo is dated… 2002.

😨

You get the idea - Caitríona's ex (and real) boyfriend, Dave, Donal, and after many, many years a new 'fiancé'. It feels like my brain is exploding. 🤯🤯🤯

*** *** ***

But back to Donal: I have a feeling that Donal may have been Caitríona's +1 at times when she did not have an official boyfriend.

*** *** *** And let's not forget: Caitríona has a sweet and tender relationship with Donal.

June 2013, Miss you babe!

December 2013, Caitríona on IG:

December 2013, Donal on IG:

April 2014: They even went hiking together in the Scottish Highlands.

I wonder, by the way, who was their mountain guide? Was it an unfortunate music manager? I think not.

I would rather point to someone else, someone who loves (and knows!) the (S)cottish (H)ighlands. But I won't name him.

⛰️🧗🏻‍♂️

*** *** ***

For those who are unfamiliar with the name Donal Brophy, here are a few words about his professional profile:

You know, it works for me: "While in New York, Donal was also known for epic parties. Everything he organized automatically became a “must-attend” event for New York’s most with-it residents."

You know, that kind of vibe (2007):

😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫

*** *** ***

Had he been Caitríona's false fiancé, it would have been easy for us to believe in the beautiful, loving bond that existed between them. But he was only the messenger of bad news. What wouldn't you do for your best friend?

❓

PS. Unless something has changed, Donal was married to Emrhys Cooper, a British actor, singer, dancer, and filmmaker. Together they run Idyllwild Pictures, an entertainment company.

Taken in July 2023:

[January 23, 2024]

[katsukiizmoon]

╰┈➤ ꒰🍰🍓🥛 ┊Katsuki will always put you together.꒱

『♡』 hurt comfort, best friend! katsuki, talks of your ex, overstimulation talk (non sexual), besties to lovers, heartache, sensory overload, reader is neurodivergent implied, confession, bunny pet name used, soft katsuki, unedited

You curl into a thick, warm chest and breathe in the scent of Katsuki. A heavy arm wraps around your shoulders, hand stopping mid back to pull you in.

You inhale, sighing deeply. Worries float from the back of your head where they’ll be buried into the ground and sprout. The hand gripping your middle rubs up and down, soothing the ache in your chest.

With a rattle, Katsuki’a chest vibrates to life as he hums. The faint sound of the AC whirring in the background calms the heat bubbling in your soul. Anger.

You’re angry. You aren’t sure why. You stopped dating your ex boyfriend a year ago. Your life is better without dating him. But.. he was once a friend.

And that makes you angry. It bubbles and boils over like a pot left on a hot eye. The heat burns and sizzles the water that is your emotions, steam swooshing throughout.

“D’ya wanna talk about it?” The blonde above you mutters, not moving from his spot. He knows you don’t like eye contact.

You find a place to hide your face between his clothed pecs and you sigh. A whine leaves your lips as you debate, unsure of whether it makes sense to talk about.

“The light was too bright and my sock felt weird, n’ the sound of the tv hurt m’teeth and and- he said he wanted to be friends still and then blocked me.” You muster out, pulling back to breathe.

Katsuki’s eyes shut and his chest sinks, his turn to take a deep breath. And he hums again, turning his face to press a kiss to the top of your head.

His voice comes out hushed, in almost a whisper, “Mmm well that’s not good, do your teeth feel better?”

You nod and one of his hands comes behind your head to tug at the roots of your hair. The tension begins leaving your forehead and you almost cry in relief.

“I’ve got some of your favorite socks, too, bunny.” Katsuki kisses your head again, slow, and with purpose. Your heart stutters and you weakly reach down to yank your current socks off.

“You do?” You ponder lowly, tilting your head to look up at the blonde.

Crimson eyes peer into your own and you bounce your eyes around the corners of the room.

“Mmm n’ let me close these curtains for ya. We’ll get comfy n take a nap.” He mutters, bed creaking.

You sniff, trying to use the tools you’ve always been told to, to not grind your teeth or clench. But before you can start having a fit, overwhelmed with everything going on, the room darkens and he comes back.

He holds a water bottle between his peck and forearm, squished there. Socks and a teether are in his other hand, separated by his fingers.

You snatch the teether and socks, quickly adjusting yourself. The bed feels too out of place and you jerk up. Slinging the blankets off to rearrange them.

Katsuki looks at the bounce in your leg and snatches your bonnet, holding it out. It relieves some of the excess stimulation. Thank god.

You flip onto the bed and chew, worrying the poor thing between teeth and lips. He crawls in after you, AC turned down and you curl into him.

He spends his time humming lowly, soothing the ache and anxiety within your poor soul. You’re met with a familiar wave of heartache and love.

Katsuki is so pretty, so perfect, and it terrifies you. Because here he is kissing your tension headache away while you fidget, near tears over the way your sock felt.

The world slowly begins to calm down, no longer hurts just to exist, by just a little.

And like every other time he’s picked your pieces up and glued you back together, you look at him like he’s everything. He’s the universe, the stars, the moons and the planets. Every galaxy has to have him in it or you’ll damn them for eternity.

He tugs at the roots of your hair again and you curl into him and let the tears leak from your eyes. Sniffling, you rub your face into his shirt and chew on the teether.

“Somethin’ else on your mind ?” He murmurs, pressing his fingers into your back in a way that relieves the muscle ache.

You let out a whine again, upset that you’ve been caught. The blanket still feels wrong and you know that no matter how you change it, it won’t fix. You know that your tongue and jaw will hurt no matter what. And it’s all too frustrating.

“M in love with you, I fink.” You barely get out, voice muffled from the spit covered baby-fidget and your face being pressed into him. Your arms shake and your chest makes you feel like you’re on a run.

The air leaves Katsuki all at once, letting out a breathy, “oh”.

And you assume the worst. You don’t even have to say it for him to know it because his arm tightens around you and he presses another kiss to the top of your head.

Your lip quivers and you start to hug, ready to sob. You crumble once again like a vase that’s been smashed against a wall. Into many pieces, where you feel like no one can ever fix you.

“Okay, fuck, okay sweetness. We’re gonna talk about this after you feel better mkay? So breathe, I’m right here.” He whispers, hushed. You nod against his chest.

Ah, there he is. Standing with the glue in his hand to pick up all your finicky, sharp pieces and glue you back together.

[117luv]

THE PARENT TRAP — LHS | CHAPTER 18

synopsis: jungwon and ni-ki met each other at a summer camp and found out they were fraternal twins. this leads to events where the two ex-lovers, heeseung and yn, are reunited after 14 years by their children.

genre: exes to lovers, smau, fluff

pairing: lee heeseung x fem!reader

warnings: cursing, poor attempts in humor, grammatical errors, marriage, pregnancy, parenthood, miscommunication

taglist: CLOSED!

a/n: 2024 is here and i cant believe how time flies so fast. also cant believe i didnt follow my sched for finishing the smau before 2023 ends but writers block and finals slowed me badly but im back and this time around, i will be finishing the smau this month. although im not to sure about the bonus chapters but will try to make one, ne ways i love every single one of you and i hope this year brings you all the best.

masterlist | previous | next

Heeseung had been preparing the proposal for months. He wanted everything to be perfect and prepared everything, from the ring to the location. He felt a rush of nervousness as he prepared the remaining things. He is remarrying the woman he loved for many years, and this time they can be together without any hindrance. He wanted the memories made with her to be nothing but full of happiness.

The boys were in charge of making sure that their mom arrived at the venue without raising any suspicion. They asked their mom to drop them off at a place where they would meet their friends, which was a lie to get her to the location. The boys alerted their dad in regards to their upcoming arrival. The moment they arrived at the venue, they made their mom walk with them until she reached a pathway.

"Follow the flowers," written on the sign in front of her, left her confused looking at her sons, but they persuaded her to just follow the sign. She was hesitant at first, but eventually followed through. As she reached the end, classical music started playing in the background. Heeseung was holding a bouquet of flowers as she walked towards him. "What is this all for?" she asked while he gave her the flowers. "My way of showing you the love that you deserve after all these years," he said as he started to kneel in front of her. "I know our time together in the beginning was rough. It has been nothing but pain and sadness after those events, but I know that was the only way at that time for the boys. But this time around, I wanted to be with you for a lifetime, and I will do everything to keep you and the boys by my side. Yn, will you marry me?" while pulling a ring box in his pocket. She quickly hugged him and uttered multiple "yes" as she grabbed his face to kiss him. He was startled for a moment, but he returned the kiss. She couldn't ask for more, and she wishes to stay like this for a long time.

After almost a year of preparation, the wedding day is finally approaching. It was a day before the wedding, and everyone was preparing for the big day. Everyone is excited, but much more so for the bride and groom. She had invited her father and brother to the wedding, while her father was hesitant to join due to their past. She wanted him to be the one to walk her down the aisle, and he was happy to do so. Sunghoon volunteered to be the ring bearer, despite her thinking he was joking at first.

The big day had come, and everyone was busy preparing for it. As she finished up her touch-ups, she walked to the door where her dad and brother were waiting. Her father saw her in the dress and couldn't help but tear up while complimenting her. Sunghoon hugged her as he wished for her to finally have the life she deserved after all these years. Now, it's time to walk down the aisle and finally meet the groom. As she walked alongside her father, Heeseung couldn't control his tears as he watched her father pass her to him. The ceremony went by, and they kissed. It was a day to cherish for years to come, and they finally got their well-deserved happiness.

taglist [CLOSED] : @yangwaa @emikisses @yohanabanana @arizejkt19 @skuwu-blog @beatr2x @svarcq @softiehee @enhastolemyheart @deobitifull @emxshu @bucketofhiros @lost-leopard-beanie @soobin-my-beloved @azurez @flwrshee @beomgyusonlywife @lalalalawon @yanagisprettygf @astrae4 @myjaeyunn @sesame-street-lol @yumilovesloona @omgjwon @yoonjunshi @wannatinyus @yeahhemmings- @coupscheri @neozon3nha @mevalemadrws @wonyoungsvirus @ilvsoup @dneltrise @chirokookie @noascats @sxftiell @onionzzzs @nokacchan @i-yeseo @02zluvbot @iamliacamila @en-happiness @nicholasluvbot @ilovewonyo @ddazed-lhs @enhaz1 @tobiosbbyghorl @youmenotyummy @minhoie @beoms-sugar

[heavyhitterheaux]

It Was Always You (NSFW 18+)

AN: second chances don't always come around, so if you see an opportunity take it. This is my first fic for Joe so go easy on me! lol

Synopsis: You and Joe both attended LSU and although you both had feelings for each other, he told you when you least expected it.... when you had a boyfriend your senior year. What happens when you see him at the LSU spring game and all of those feelings are now rushing back towards you? The feelings that you tried so hard to put in the back of your mind?

Pairing: Joe Burrow x Reader

Requested by: @soaharleys and @a-moment-captured 💖

Joe Burrow Masterlist

Do not engage if you are not 18+

Please Do Not Repost My Content Anywhere

Your breath hitched in your throat when you had finally caught sight of him standing next to Ja’Marr and looked around to see if you could make an escape.

Because right now you wanted to disappear into thin air.

You were now back at LSU for the spring game and knew that it was only a matter of time before you ran into him.

Joe.

The ex that wasn’t really your ex

The one that got away

Because of the way that the two of you left things, if it was up to you, you wouldn't have bothered showing up knowing that he would be here. But your two best friends dragged you along so you didn't really have a choice. They were always Team Y/N and Joe from the beginning and it doesn't look like that was changing any time soon.

The two of you were basically inseparable during your time at LSU, but a relationship never bloomed and there were so many factors as to why. After he got drafted to the NFL, you watched his professional career closely and always congratulated him on social media. He did the same with you seeing as you were now a professional gymnast.

And the crazy part of it all was that you trained in Cincinnati.

But that was as far as it went, social media and nothing else. He also followed your career closely just like you did his and would always tell you underneath your posts how proud he was of you.

Even though there was a time that it was rare to see either of you without each other, it was almost as if you were now strangers and you couldn’t understand how it got to this point.

You just figured both of your careers were now taking off and left it at that even though deep down you did miss him and wanted to reach out to him.

But you were scared.

Scared of what, you didn’t exactly know but you figured that you were scared of your feelings that you had towards him which you didn’t want to admit. 

But you had to be honest with yourself. You did know how the two of you got to that point.

During your senior year, you had a boyfriend.

And Joe did not like that one bit. You could tell he was against the relationship from the beginning, but seeing how happy you were, he let it go.

Then it all came to a head.

You admit that you did spend less time with him and in return he decided to tell you how your boyfriend didn't deserve you and was cheating on you every chance he got.

Then the argument happened.

You called him jealous and the only thing that came out of his mouth was 'Well what if I am? He doesn't treat you right!'

'Oh and I suppose you know someone who can do better? You are so jealous of him that it's actually pathetic. I thought you would be happy for me. You're supposed to be one of my best friends!'

'Anybody can do better than his ass! How can I be happy for you when I'm absolutely in love with you?! You belong with me, NOT him!'

'Joey...'

Next thing you knew his lips were on yours and as bad as you wanted to push him away, you didn't.

It wasn't until your phone went off to tell you that he was downstairs waiting for you for date night.

You abruptly pushed Joe away from you and all he could do was sigh in defeat because he knew.

He knew that you would go back to him despite everything that he had put you through.

'Joe, why would you kiss me knowing that I have a boyfriend?'

'Then why would you kiss me back when you know the exact same thing?'

You didn't have a response for him and just stared anywhere but his eyes. It wasn't until he lifted your chin for you to look at him that your eyes welled up with tears.

'Let me show you how you deserve to be treated. Leave him. You already know being with me that you'll want for nothing.'

You didn't know how long you stood there staring back into his blue eyes, but you finally broke.

'Joey, I love you but I love him too and I...'

'You're choosing him over me.'

'No, babe just wait a minute please.' You said while trying to catch his arm as he turned around to leave out of your apartment.

'Wait for what? I'm not waiting for the person that I'm completely in love with go and love someone else in front of my face and that someone else doesn't deserve it. I love you, but I can't do this anymore Y/N. Just.... take care of yourself.'

Joe then placed a kiss on your forehead as you suddenly raised your voice to ask him what that meant.

He couldn't just leave you and your friendship behind, you wouldn't let him.

'Joe...'

Joe turned around to walk away from you and was making his way through the living room as you kept calling him.

'Joey... what does that mean? What does that mean? ANSWER ME DAMN IT! Don't do this, I... I need you in my life. Ever since you came into it, I can't see myself without you.'

'I can't be friends with you anymore and watch you love someone else that isn't me as selfish as that sounds. Y/N, don't call me when he breaks your heart either because I'm here trying to save you from the heartbreak, but your falling into head first.'

As hard as it was to leave your apartment seeing you with tears run down your face, Joe walked out of the door and never looked back.

Not even a week later, your boyfriend broke up with you.

You tried to call Joe right after it happened and of course....

he didn't answer.

"Ooh, look! It’s your man. Go and talk to him.” Your friend Jada said while pushing you towards him, but you immediately shook your head no.

Jada was with you on the gymnastics team at LSU along with your other friend Destiny and the three of you remained close after graduation. They didn't know the story behind what actually happened between you two seeing as you would get upset every time you thought about it. Because of that, you just let it go. 

“Why not? He literally has not stopped looking in this direction since you came through the door.” Destiny added while looking over at you confused.

“He doesn’t want to talk to me.”

“Uhh?? His bedroom eyes that he’s giving you is saying different and what makes you think that? There was a time where the two of you were inseparable and I was convinced you wanted to be in his nutsack so that you could hang with him all day.”

“JADA!”

“Tell me I’m lying. All of us just knew that the two of you were going to end up together and were very surprised that the two of you just went your separate ways.”

“We talk on social media.”

“Barely. You should have been sending him nudes to get his attention. A little titty pic never hurt anybody” Jada added and Destiny just shook her head at her.

“Not everyone can be successful from their only fans, Jada.”

“I only did it for six months!”

You and Joe had formally met when there was one night when you couldn’t sleep and decided to go to the gym on campus. You were in there for about ten minutes by yourself before Joe came in with his headphones on. He sent you a small smile and you went back to doing your workout. It wasn’t until you needed a spotter for your chest press that you actually spoke to him. Of course he agreed and the two of you had been close ever since. 

“Oh shit, oh shit, he’s coming, he’s coming!” You whispered to them as you noticed Joe starting to make his way over to the three of you. 

“Oh Y/N will definitely make sure that he’s coming later if I have anything to do with it.”

“And this is why we never want to take your ass in public. You don’t know how to act.” Destiny said while shaking her head.

“All I’m trying to do is make sure my bestie gets dicked down, there’s no harm in that.”

“Ladies.” Joe greeted the two of them while you just stayed quiet.

“Hiiii Joe.” Jada and Destiny responded while you just tried to stifle a laugh. They were so incredibly full of it.

He then turned to you and gave you his famous smile and of course you couldn’t help but to smile back at him.

“Y/N, long time no see.”

“Too long in my opinion.” You heard Jada say and Destiny immediately pinched her.

“It’s so good to see you.” It almost came out like a sigh of relief, but your heart rate had definitely begun to pick up even more now that he was right in front of you.

You should have chosen him over your ex-boyfriend and you regret making that decision every day.

“You mind if we go somewhere and talk?” Joe asked while scratching the back of his neck and you immediately nodded your head.

“I slipped a condom in your purse earlier just in case. I got the largest size that I could find. Because we KNOW it's big.” Jada whispered in your ear and all you did was look at her in disbelief before turning back to Joe.

“Sure.”

The two of you walked in a comfortable silence until you reached downstairs in the hallway leading to the locker rooms knowing that you two would be able to have privacy.

You were looking down, being more interested in your shoes when Joe placed his finger under your chin so that you could look up at him. Just like old times when he desperately wanted your attention.

“I actually had this whole speech about what I was going to say to you when I saw you today, but now that you’re in front of me all of that has gone out the window.”

“Whole speech for what?” You curiously asked while you felt your chest was about to burst.

“I… I hate the way that we drifted and there’s really no excuse for it. You were one of my biggest supporters while I was here and you were the first one I told when I said that I wanted to enter the draft. I left you in a time where you probably needed me the most and I feel like I failed you. Even if you didn't feel the same way, I should have been a better friend to you and support you in whatever was going on with him.”

“Who said that I didn't feel the same way?”

“You did?”

“Yes and I thought that I was making it obvious. I just didn't expect to be in love with two people at the same time.”

“I liked you since I first laid eyes on you, but not knowing if you felt the same, I didn’t bother saying anything. At that time, being your friend was good enough for me. Especially because I didn’t know if you felt the same way. Even though I could have just asked you, I didn't know what I would do if you said you didn't share those same feelings. But, I couldn’t risk losing our friendship. When I got drafted and then moved to Cincinnati, I tried to push the feelings to the back of my mind. I thought if I wasn’t always around you that they would go away, but that couldn’t have been further from the truth. And seeing you today, I realized that the feelings never left. I thought that distance would help but it didn't. Still want you just as much as I wanted you then and I'm sorry for not being there for you when you needed it.”

You were quiet for a few minutes taking everything in while Joe on the other hand was starting to grow nervous because you hadn’t said anything in response to him.

“Y/N?”

“I wish that you would have told me sooner.”

“Why? Do you have a boyfriend that I don’t know about? Again?”

Joe asked while once again getting a defeated look on his face. You decided for him to sweat it out a little bit before answering.

“No, but we have barely spoken in three years and I fucking missed you but didn’t know if you missed me too and that was why I didn’t say anything. That fight we had? Joey we never fought.. EVER.”

“I know. I've replayed it so many times in my head and walking away from you is the hardest thing that I've ever done. It was always you and I hated how long it took for me to realize it. No matter how much I tried to suppress my feelings I get it if you don’t…” You immediately cut him off.

“If I don’t what? I thought it was obvious that I liked you too and still want you in my life despite how much you pushed me away. I did agree to talk to you today after all. I just didn't expect you to wait to tell me that until I had a boyfriend. Come on, I would get us both Starbucks every morning before class and I shared my apple cinnamon muffins with you and no one else every time I made them. No one got that same treatment. I woke up at 6 in the morning for you, I didn’t even do that for my ex-boyfriend.”

“Ja’Marr also pointed that out, but I didn’t notice.”

"You don't know how hard I had to suppress my feelings for you while I was with him. I thought that you were giving me all of these signs that you liked me back, but when you didn't ask me out, I thought that I had misunderstood you. But then you finally did tell me and I was put in a difficult situation."

"If I would have just told you then we wouldn't even be here right now having this conversation because we would be together."

“So, what now?” You asked wanting an immediate answer.

“I’m doing it the right way this time. Date night later? Now I'm really going to show you how you deserve to be treated.”

—-

Joe was now pounding into you as you reached up to wrap your arms around his shoulders in order to bring him closer to you if that was even possible.

Luckily that condom Jada slipped into your purse earlier came in handy.

As your left thigh wrapped around him, he adjusted both of you in order to be able to grab your hip tighter to continue his movements in and out of you. It was a long time coming with built up frustration on both of your parts since no one wanted to admit their feelings first.

But you had to admit that the wait had been worth it. You had lost count of how many times he had made you cum and you knew for a fact that he wasn’t going to be done any time soon. And if he was, it was only for a small break and then this would continue later.

He then reached down to place kisses all along your breasts before taking one nipple into his mouth and massaging the other one making a moan quickly escape from your lips. As much as you were trying to hold back, you were failing miserably. Joe was doing everything he could to get you to come undone in front of him and you knew that it was only a matter of time.

“Mmm, baby you feel so good around me.” Joe whispered into your ear as he reached down to massage your clit and you only gave him a moan in response. Your back immediately arched up from the mattress beneath you as Joe was trying to hold you in place so that you didn’t move.

“Oohhh shit, right there, baby stay right there.” Joe heard you say and immediately slipped out of you to then put his mouth on you while adding two fingers.

“You going to be a good girl and cum for me again? Been waiting for this.”

You eagerly nodded your head yes as he put his mouth back on you without breaking eye contact. He grabbed your legs tighter to pull you closer to him so that now they were both resting on his shoulders. Your breathing had picked up and you knew that you were close. Joe knew it too as he began to suck on your clit which immediately made you gasp.

“I know you’re not running from me, baby. Spread those legs. You have a few more left in you, don't you?”

“Joeyyyyyyy….”

“Didn’t realize how much I missed you calling me that.”

Less than a minute later, you were coming undone in front of him as he continued sucking on your clit making you cry out in pleasure.

As you rode out your high, Joe was placing kisses on the insides of your thighs as he waited for your breathing to become even again. When it finally did, you sat up to meet him halfway as you brought your lips to his in an intense kiss. It almost seemed desperate at this point wanting for him to explore every inch of you and wanting to do the same for him. 

You then made a motion to flip the two of you over and Joe had gotten a surprised look on his face as he looked up at you.

“Damn, I forgot how strong your ass was.”

“You should know better since I could almost lift just as heavy as you could.” You replied as you slowly sat down on him letting him fill you up as moans escaped from the both of you.

His hands immediately went to your hips to help guide you as you were slowly riding him. You could tell that he wanted for you to go faster, but you wanted to take your time. The clock on the nightstand read 1 am and you knew that you still had a few more rounds left in you.

“Come on, babe.” Joe breathlessly said and you could tell that he was growing impatient.

“Patience, Joseph.”

“I am being patient. Take your time, but hurry up.”

“And I see that some things still haven’t changed.” You said in response to him as you rolled your eyes.

“You said how much you missed me earlier so you better ride this dick like it.”

That was all he needed for you to say as you lifted up and slammed back down on him and increased your pace.

“Fuckkkk, baby.”

“You coming undone underneath me is a sight that I’ll never get tired of seeing.” You confessed as Joe gripped your hips even tighter. You had a feeling that was going to leave a mark later, but for now you didn’t care. 

“I’m close, babe.”

You then placed your hands on Joe’s stomach to help you lift up as you were also close and could feel him start to twitch inside you.

“Shit!”

As Joe was cumming you continued to ride him and finally lifted yourself off of him to lay beside him. He immediately brought you back on top of him while kissing you as you were eagerly kissing him back. 

After discarding the used condom, Joe turned the shower on to a comfortable temperature before going back into the bedroom to pick you up off of the bed to lead you back into the bathroom. 

Joe helped you put your box braids into a high bun in the hopes of not getting your hair wet when both of you stepped into the shower with him going first and holding his hand out towards you. Joe was staring down at you smiling and you couldn’t help but to smile back.

“What? Why are you looking at me like that?” You asked as you reached to the side of him to grab your mango body wash that was perched on the side while he had begun to wash his hair.

“Just happy you agreed to go on a date with me. Despite how I left things between us. I just... I won't let that ever happen again. If problems arise, we work through it.”

“Did you think that I was going to say no?”

“To be honest, I wasn’t sure. That’s why it took me so long to say anything.”

“Well, I’m glad I didn't so now Jada and Destiny can shut up about it.”

“You know they all had a bet going since we were at LSU right?” Joe asked you and you immediately looked at him confused.

“A bet for what?”

“To see how long it would take for us to start talking to each other again. I don’t think anyone thought that it would take this long.”

“Me either, but it worked out how it was supposed to.”

“And I now owe Ja’Marr 1500 dollars. He said that you were going to say yes to the date and work on moving on from what happened between us.”

"Oh, shit. YOU OWE HIM TOO?"

"Wait?! He?"

"Text me and told me the exact same thing yesterday and said I would owe him 1500 if you proved me wrong."

"Can't stand his ass, he always was right about everything."

"He will never let us live this one down."

Liked by joeyb_9, lahjay10_, lsuladytigers, msjada, chooseyourowndestiny, simonebiles, zendaya, and 836,204 others

y/nthegymnast: date night 💕

y/nupdates: OH, WE GOT A NEW MAN!

msjada: HOLD ON, WHOSE HAND IS THAT?!

chooseyourowndestiny: msjada you are so damn slow. you know whose hand that is! Y/N GET IN HERE!

lahjay10_: joeyb_9 BITCH BETTER HAVE MY MONEY. BOTH OF YOU PAY UP!

joeyb_9: lahjay10_ how do you know it's even me in the pic?!

lahjay10_: joeyb_9 currently looking in the imaginary camera like I'm on the office. you been after her since forever. PAY ME RIGHT NOW.

y/nthegymnast: okay this would have been REAL awkward if that wasn't in fact joeyb_9 🙄

msjada: y/nthegymnast I take it you probably used what I slipped you earlier? 👀

y/nthegymnast: msjada and had to go get more

msjada: MY GIRL!

chooseyourowndestiny: msjada actually does know what she's talking about sometimes

lahjay10_: okay cool, so when's the wedding?

y/nthegymnast: lahjay10_ you should have seen how red he turned just now after reading that

I plan on doing a separate taglist for my Joey girls so message me if you want to be on it 💖

[magicfootballstuff]

Strictly Unprofessional - part 7 (alexia putellas x reader)

Summary: You’ve just landed your dream job as a photographer at FC Barcelona Femení. The only problem? You hooked up with the captain five years ago and haven’t seen her since.

Part 7/9

Previous parts here.

———

Part 7

five years ago

You’ve moved on from the beach club. You spent a good few hours with Alexia earlier, drinking, dancing, getting to know each other, before the afternoon Ibizan sun became too much. 

You returned to your separate hotels to cool off and get changed with a plan to meet up again later, which is what led you here. There are eight of you crammed into a booth at the bar you’ve picked to start your night - you and your two best friends, Alexia and her sister Alba, as well as a group of three girls that Alba seems to have befriended at the beach club this afternoon while all Alexia’s attention was on you. But you only really have eyes for Alexia.

Neither of you is being subtle about it. Alexia’s hand found its way into your lap with remarkable ease and you’ve been absently toying with each other’s fingers ever since. 

The group is mixed but everyone seems to be getting along well. There’s something unspoken in the air, the understanding that the main reason this particular group is hanging out is because you and Alexia are trying to pretend that you aren’t just thinking about getting each other alone later, but once the shots start flowing and the drinking games begin, everybody seems to forget about that.

When it’s Alexia’s turn to get the group a round of drinks, you go with her to the bar, claiming that you’ll help her carry the drinks back to the table when really you just want the chance to talk to her alone. She’s unbelievably attractive, even under the dim lighting in the bar, and you can’t stop looking at her.

Your staring doesn’t go unnoticed.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” Alexia asks, as you wait at the bar to be served.

You’ve lost count of how much you’ve had to drink, spread out enough across the whole day that you’re buzzed rather than drunk, but it’s enough to embolden you into admitting, “You’re really pretty, that’s all. Also, I kind of want to kiss you right now.”

The corners of Alexia’s mouth twist up, though she keeps her gaze straight ahead.

“What?” you nudge her.

“I’m not used to a girl being so direct about what she wants,” Alexia replies, finally turning and leaning sideways on the bar as she smirks at you.

“We’ve been dancing around this for half a day,” you point out. “That’s hardly direct.”

“You know what I mean,” Alexia says, in a low voice.

“So can I?” you dare to ask.

“What?” Alexia frowns.

“Kiss you.”

In lieu of an answer, Alexia lifts a hand to cup your face, her fingers tangling into your hair, and dips her head to close the gap between you, pressing her lips to yours. Your own hands seek her hips, pulling her closer to eliminate all space between you as you return her kiss.

You can’t believe after an entire afternoon and evening together - dancing, flirting, touching - that it’s taken you this long to finally reach this point, but the wait only makes it better. Your ex is long forgotten, as are the protests you gave earlier that you didn’t want to find somebody new, because the spark you feel as Alexia’s tongue swipes across the seam of your lips until you grant her entry feels inevitable.

You’re eventually pulled apart by a loud heckle from the booth where your friends are sitting.

“Alexia!” Alba shouts. “You can do that after I’ve got my drink.”

Alexia just lifts her middle finger to flip off her sister as she grins against your lips and pulls you in for another kiss.

———

present day

In hindsight, it probably wasn’t the best idea to have a moment with Alexia the night before you have to pretend everything is normal in front of twenty other people in the executive box at Camp Nou.

It had been so effortless back in Ibiza, so easy to tell Alexia you wanted to kiss her and follow through. Back when there were zero consequences, when you thought you were never going to see her again.

Out of all the options yesterday, you realise you probably picked the worst one. It probably would have been simpler if you’d just gone for it and kissed her instead of whatever mess you’ve ended up creating in the process of trying to do the right thing for both your careers.

Because now you’re here, introducing your dad to somebody you can barely make eye contact with. 

“Papi, this is Alexia. The one who got us the tickets.”

“I know who this is,” your dad says, already intent on embarrassing you. “A Barcelona legend.”

You knew that your dad follows the women’s team as well as the men’s, especially since you started working for them. He’s even been to a couple of games at the Johan Cruyff. But nothing could have prepared you for the way he greets Alexia like an enthusiastic fanboy.

Alexia doesn’t seem fazed by your dad’s enthusiasm. Instead, she greets him with a handshake and says, “You’ve got a very talented daughter. She’s been teaching me how to take good photos.”

Your cheeks flush. So far, your version of “teaching” Alexia has involved letting her try out your camera a few times and then almost kissing her during your impromptu photoshoot last night. Alexia’s flattery to charm your dad is an exaggeration, but it’s working.

“I wish I could say she got her artistic talent from me but I’m colourblind,” he jokes. “Maybe you could teach her a few things with a football in return. I tried to encourage her to play when she was younger but she was an uncoordinated little thing.”

“Okay, Papi,” you interject. “That’s enough. Don’t embarrass me. Do you want something to eat before the game starts?”

“Yes, that sounds nice.”

You glance at Alexia, who meets your gaze with an amused glint in her eyes, before she turns back to your dad and says, “It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

You quickly steer your dad away before you regret introducing him to Alexia, and attempt to distract him with the food provided for the guests. Luckily for you, your dad is a simple man to please and he’s soon forgotten all about trying to embarrass you.

Alexia has invited a few of the other players too and you seek out Mapi as soon as you possibly can, once you’ve left your dad alone with a beer and a plate of food.

“I nearly kissed her last night,” you admit to Mapi, in a hushed voice, unable to keep the secret any longer.

“Who?”

“Ingrid,” you reply sarcastically, causing Mapi to roll her eyes at you. “No, who do you think? Alexia.”

“And why didn’t you?” Mapi asks.

“I don’t know,” you confess. “Gay panic?”

Mapi smiles and shakes her head, and you could swear that you can feel the judgement radiating off her.

“I thought this is what you wanted.”

“It is, I think,” you say. “But I don’t know what she wants. Maybe she only wants to hook up again.”

“Have you talked to her about this?” Mapi asks, arching an eyebrow.

“I can’t just…”

“Why not?” Mapi demands, as if talking about your feelings is the easiest thing in the world. “Listen, I know Alexia very well and the best thing you can do is just be honest with her. If she doesn’t want to be with you I promise she’s not going to make it weird. Just tell her you’re sorry for being an idiot and that you want to kiss her.”

“What, now?” you ask, glancing across to where Alexia stands talking to somebody who you recognise instantly from Ibiza as her younger sister.

“Oh my god, you’re useless,” Mapi groans. “I can’t tell you everything. But if you want to confess your eternal love in front of her entire family, your dad, and half of her teammates, be my guest.”

Sensing the sarcasm dripping off Mapi’s voice, you hum and say, “Right. I’ll wait for a better time.”

“Thank you, by the way,” Mapi says.

You frown in confusion and ask, “What for?”

“There’s been an uncharacteristic lack of drama at this club recently, but this? This is feeding me.”

“Oh, fuck off.”

———

When the game starts, you watch it from the seating area just outside the suite. You’ve got your dad on one side and a few of the players on the other, but it’s Alexia, sitting a few seats to the right in the row in front with some of her family, that has your attention more than the football playing out on the pitch below.

You want to talk to her, to erase last night’s mistake by apologising for your panic, but Mapi is right that it’s not a good time.

But you watch Alexia, the passion that she shows on the pitch seeping out as she cheers for the team she loves. She’s out of her seat every time Barcelona get close to the goal, bellowing instructions to the players like she’s a coach on the sidelines not a fan in the stands, and when Barcelona finally go a goal ahead just before half time, she’s on her feet and embracing her sister in celebration immediately.

At half time, you head back into the hospitality suite with your dad.

“Alexia is nice,” he comments. “I wondered if she’d be all ego but she seems very normal.”

“All the players are great,” you say, trying to divert his attention away from Alexia.

Unsuccessfully.

“Is she single?” he asks.

“Papi!” you scold him.

“What?” he has the audacity to ask, as if he doesn’t know the problem with what he’s just asked.

“I work with her,” you point out, though your mind immediately wanders back to last night. What if you’d kissed her? What if you hadn’t run away?

“Sorry,” your dad apologises. “You can’t blame me for asking though. I just want to see you happy. And who wouldn’t want a daughter-in-law who can get them free tickets to Camp Nou?”

“Stop it,” you warn him again. “This isn’t an appropriate conversation to have at all, but especially not here.”

“Sorry,” he says again. “I’m going to find the bathroom.”

Your dad leaves, much to your relief, but the relief is short-lived because somebody else comes to stand beside you.

“She is,” they say.

You turn your head to find that the voice belongs to Alexia’s sister, Alba. The first and only other time you’ve met her was in Ibiza, and you were far more interested in getting off with her sister than getting to know her, which is why it surprises you that she wants to talk now.

“What?” you ask, confused.

“Alexia,” Alba elaborates. “She’s single, just in case you were wondering.”

Your cheeks burn red with embarrassment as you realise she must have overheard every word of the conversation you had with your dad a minute ago. But if she heard him asking if Alexia was single, then she must also have heard your insistence on keeping things professional.

“That’s all in the past,” you insist. “We work together. Nothing more.”

“Then we can agree that I know Alexia better than you?” Alba asks.

You nod cautiously, fully aware that you’re probably nodding yourself into a trap.

“Alexia and I are really close,” Alba continues. “She tells me everything. But she didn’t tell me that she’d seen you again at all, let alone that she sees you every day. You can read into that.”

“That she doesn’t care?” you ask with a shrug.

“Or that she does and she knew I’d make a big deal out of it so she kept it from me to avoid that stress while she figures out how she feels. Who knows what goes on in her mind? She’s an overthinker. It’s one of the things that makes her so good at football but useless when it comes to things like this.”

“Funny,” you say, shaking your head, “I’ve been called useless tonight too.”

“Mapi?” Alba asks, arching an amused eyebrow and you nod. “Well at least you know you’ve got one thing in common with Alexia. Listen, I shouldn’t be saying this but you left quite an impression on Alexia in Ibiza.”

“So much of an impression that she forgot who I was?”

Alba grimaces and says, “Okay, I agree, that was bad. But she was hung up on you for a couple of weeks after we got back.”

“I find that hard to believe.”

“Just talk to her,” Alba says, starting to back away as she nods at something behind you, and you turn to see Alexia approaching.

“What are you talking to my sister about?” Alexia asks, once Alba has moved out of earshot, leaving you alone with the one person you don’t trust yourself to be alone with.

“The match,” you lie.

You can tell Alexia doesn’t believe you, but you’re grateful she doesn’t push it. Remembering Alba’s comment about telling each other everything, maybe Alexia hopes she can get the truth out of her sister later.

“Alba recognised you right away,” Alexia tells you. “The second she saw you, she said “Isn’t that the hot one you slept with in Ibiza?” In front of my mami too. Talk about embarrassing.”

“Not quite as embarrassing as the fact your sister recognised me after five years and you didn’t,” you say, unable to stop yourself from teasing her.

The air is tense between you. You know you probably need to say something about last night, anything to try and put things back to normal, but you’ve never been good at difficult conversations. That much was proven last night when you chose to run away instead of staying to talk about your feelings.

One thing you can do, however, is humour, which is why you nudge Alexia, anything to try to cut through the tension, and ask, “So, your sister thinks I’m hot?”

“Stop it,” Alexia says, swatting your arm and pouting, before she mumbles, “I thought I was your type, not her.”

“Ah, so you do remember,” you say, grinning at the memory of your first ever conversation with Alexia at the beach party in Ibiza. You wonder how different your life would have ended up being if it had been Alba who approached you that day instead of Alexia.

“You’re never going to let me live that down, are you?”

“Not a chance.” You laugh and shake your head, before adding as an afterthought. “You are my type, by the way.”

Alexia winces and your stomach drops, worried that you’ve said the wrong thing.

“What?”

“About last night…” Alexia starts.

It’s the conversation you both really need to have, but you’re punished for procrastinating and not having it earlier as Mapi calls out to interrupt your conversation.

“Come on Alexia, the match is about to… oh.” Mapi trails off as she sees the two of you standing together alone, and her eyes widen as she realises that she’s probably interrupting something important. “Sorry. Carry on.”

Through the open door leading back out to your seats, you can hear the rest of Camp Nou erupt into cheers and you assume that the players must be returning to the pitch for the second half.

This conversation will have to wait.

“Can we talk?” you plead with Alexia. “Later - after the match - or another time soon?”

“What are you doing tomorrow?” Alexia asks.

“Nothing.”

“How about we go for lunch?” she suggests. “We can talk then.”

“Sounds good.”

“I’ll text you later,” Alexia says, and you realise the conversation is over for now as she makes her way back outside for the second half. You follow her out, ignoring Mapi’s searching gaze as you squeeze past her to get back to your seat beside your dad.

For the rest of the match, your mind is far from football.

[funkycatbruh]

jungkook recs 2

one shots y series sin terminar

INCOMPLETAS

SERIES

Dilf Iinstalments - @mercurygguk

SYNOPSIS. this series follows jungkook’s life as a divorced father. but wait, how exactly does one balance being a father, a boyfriend, a friend, and a respectable boss at the same time? read the installments below to find out!

GENRE. established relationship, smut/angst/fluff

♡ an ode to a broken heart - @smoochkooks

pairing ↠ jeon jungkook x reader

SYNOPSIS. you’ve watched jeon jungkook slip out of your reach your entire life. now it’s time for you to finally move on, bury the past and open a new chapter. however, you’re doing it in your own, unconventional way - by publishing anonymously a novel about your miserable relationship.

GENRE. unrequited love, best friends to (?), heavy angst, future smut

Colour Me In - @taegularities

pairing ↠ artist/fuckboy!Jungkook x reader

SYNOPSIS. Jungkook's door only opens for you when there's a barter: a trade of lust and haze. But today you knock for something more, as intriguing as it is frightening – and you hope it doesn't close his door forever.

GENRE. fwb, fake dating, college!au; fluff, angst, smut

Our Beloved Summer - @jeonqkooks

pairing ↠ producer!jungkook x songwriter!reader

SYNOPSIS. You made a vow to hate Jeon Jungkook ever since he packed up and left you without a single explanation, but when he shows up at your door after years of radio silence, it turns out that maybe your resolve isn’t as strong as you thought.

GENRE. exes to lovers, slow burn, fluff, angst, eventual smut; individual warnings for each part

Gold Is Dull - @kookluvre

pairing ↠ jeon jungkook x female reader

SYNOPSIS. your once-love abandoned you to chase his dreams as a boxer, leaving you and unknowingly, at the time, his son. as much as you want to forget him, you can't. you see him on the billboard, tv commercials, and in your son's room, reminding you of everything you once were.

GENRE. boxer!jk, dilf!jk, single mom! oc, heavy angst, ex-boyfriend, eventual smut, fluff

Bloodline - @jjkeverlast

pairing ↠ fuckboy!jk x fuckgirl!f.reader

SYNOPSIS. a relationship was the last thing you wanted, but having wild and experimenting sex? now that was something, and jeon jungkook is there to give you simply that. as long as either catch feelings... but that won't be hard for you knowing you'd never go for a guy like jungkook, although jungkook might have another opinion about you. let the (fun) begin!

GENRE. slow burn, smut , humor, angst and college au.

All I Want - @sxtaep

pairing ↠ fuckboy!jk x textbooknerd!reader

SYNOPSIS. you fall into the temptation of fucking your best friend, aka the biggest fuckboy on campus.

GENRE. bf2l, smut, angst, fluff, dom!jk, sub!reader, annoying jk, awkwardness, tension, some pining, teasing, making out

Tears Dry - @codebts

pairing ↠ jungkook x reader, ft. eunwoo

SYNOPSIS. he walks away, the sun goes down. he takes the day, but i’m grown. and in your grey, in this cool shade, my tears dry on their own.

GENRE. smut, angst; hybrid au, university au; one-sided love

♡ Hustlers - @jinconda

pairing ↠ Jungkook x Reader

SYNOPSIS. When Jeongguk’s girlfriend, Jihyo is taken by the Daechwita gang, everyone’s friendships are tested as Jeongguk does anything in pursuit of getting her back.

GENRE. : violence, killing , graphic themes, dark themes, swearing, angst.

Dilf jk series - @venusiangguk

pairing ↠ jungkook x reader / dilf jk x grocery store clerk oc

SYNOPSIS. you find a baby in your store and in turn, a dilf finds you

GENRE. strangers to lovers, friends with benefits, smut, fluff

♡ For What Its Worth - @citrustan

pairing ↠ student!reader x crush!jungkook

SYNOPSIS. you make an awful revelation about your crush of two years.

GENRE. angst, fluff (this comes in a bit later), light smut, college

♡ Love Lies - @kooktrash

HIATUS

pairing ↠ jungkook x reader

SYNOPSIS. an arrogant womanizer who’s spent his life numb to love. an unlovable romantic who’s been hurt one too many times. he’s your friend’s ex boyfriend but he tells you he wants you. he’s obsessive and you’re not as much of a victim as you make yourself out to be. you’ll both do whatever it takes to get what you want.

GENRE. angst. smut. future yandere jungkook. college student au. rich kid jungkook. f!reader. unhealthy attachment.. slutshaming. toxic friendships. implied emotional trauma from both ends

Paired and Pierced - @yoon-kooks

pairing ↠ hotnerd!jungkook x popular!reader(

SYNOPSIS.  When your professor assigns a collaborative midterm project, you’re paired up with Jeon Jungkook, the quiet grumpy smartass who keeps to himself and doesn’t fuck with popular kids like you. If you can win him over, he might give you a taste of the tatted and pierced body he’s carefully tucked away beneath those

GENRE.  smut, fluff, college!au

The Hit List - @whoretan

pairing ↠ Fuckboy!JK, introvert!Reader

SYNOPSIS. The Bangtan Frat is known for its prestige reputation of top GPAs, hosting the hottest most qualified students in the country, and above all: their undefeated list of heartbreaks. What happens when one of the seven ends up drunkenly at your doorstep?

GENRE. Smut (Future), emphasize on the Angst, and Romance

♡ Polarity - @darkestcorners

pairing ↠ yandere!jungkook x (f) reader

SYNOPSIS. Your best friend’s new boyfriend becomes infatuated with you…

GENRE. toxic relationships, unhealthy and obsessive behavior , mentions of mental health, manipulation, blackmail, cheating,

This Is Us - @btsgotjams27

pairing ↠ jungkook x f!reader

SYNOPSIS. after fighting to be in a relationship with jungkook, you begin to wonder if it's all worth it.

GENRE. drama, romance, angst, fluff, smut | est!relationship, age gap. cheating

If you love someone, say it - @letsstargaze

pairing ↠ jungkook x reader

SYNOPSIS. jungkook and you made a promise to each other five years ago, one you feared he would keep. now that the promise was close to being broken, shouldn't you feel relieved? why is it he's the happiest he's ever been, and you're wishing you were anywhere but here?

GENRE. angst, implied s*x, mentions of alcohol use.

♡ Ecstasy - @gdjyho

pairing ↠ jungkook x female reader

SYNOPSIS. jungkook fucks the reader completely dumb. you need him so bad. you can’t help it

GENRE. cheating, side chick au

»»————-　♡　————-««

UPCOMING

Wrong Time - @spideyjimin

SYNOPSIS. meeting ten years later the girl he deeply fell in love with is something Jungkook never thought would happen. but here you are, standing before his eyes with a bright smile on your face as you walk through the massive lobby of his company. at that exact moment, he realizes that the two of you fell in love at the wrong time but is now the right time?  

GENRE. parent au, exes to lovers, ceo au, angst, fluff, and smut

Over Wine - @koocycle

pairing ↠ husband! jungkook x ex-model! fem reader

SYNOPSIS. designer dresses, spa weekends and rare wines are no longer enough to keep your marriage afloat. with your husband gone from home and a marriage standing on shaky grounds, you stumble back to your neglected career in the hopes it’ll fulfill the void in your life. you’re ready to take the risk this time, whether that is with the emerald cut diamond around your ring finger, or without.

GENRE. rich couple! au, established relationship! au, married couple! au, semi sugar daddy! au, suburban couple! au, angst, fluff and smut.

TO BE READ

ONE SHOT

The Lines Between Us - @chateautae

pairing ↠ detective!jungkook x detective!reader

SYNOPSIS. you’re detective partners who hate each other’s guts and everyone knows it. what they don’t know however, is that there’s so much more between the lines, and he knows damn well how to rearrange your guts too.

GENRE. detective!au, partner!jungkook, e2l!au, fwb!au, slight fantasy!au, one-shot, smut, angst

SERIES

The Rule Book - @another-army-spot

pairing ↠ Jungkook x reader

SYNOPSIS. Despite being the notorious fuck girl on campus, you have morals and values that you stick to with a solid set of rules.  One of your rules excludes Golden Boy, Jungkook, from ever getting a chance with you, much to both of your dismay.  And he intends to change that, with one really irresistible bet. 

GENRE. friends-to-lovers, college!au, softfuckboy!jk, fuckgirl!oc, fraternity!au, eventual smut 

INCOMPLETA

Chasing Pavements

hiatus

pairing ↠ dad!jk/married!jk/bff!jk x reader (ft. taehyung) 

SYNOPSIS. But tonight, Jungkook is taking a different route. One that does not lead to his home, but to your apartment building instead. He never takes it unless it’s Friday, the day he drops Sunhi off in your care for a few hours while he pretends he wants to fix whatever marital issues he has.

GENRE. f2l, angst, unrequited feelings au, sad stuff, future smut, cheating

Hate At First Weeb

pairing ↠ weeb!jungkook x weeb!reader

SYNOPSIS. You just want to weeb in peace but your annoying downstairs neighbour just won’t let you bREATHE.

GENRE. college au, e2l, weeb!reader, weeb!jungkook, weeb!jimin, jimin is lgbt, taehyung is lgbt

You Belong With Me - @joonscroll

pairing ↠ jungkook x reader

SYNOPSIS. you’ve been in love with jungkook since the moment you first saw him. he's always seen you as a friend. watching him date other girls and having to pretend you’re not in love with him is killing you.  

GENRE. : angst, fluff