#awards are pointless anyway I don’t know why I care

[petalsfordany]

good morning I see sophie nelisse has been robbed. also nothing for writing, music, or directing. cool cool cool

[carpexiem]

small rant

idk if it’s just me but i’m honestly kinda losing that love i had for kpop years ago. maybe it was a phase who knows? but i’m just tired of these idols. it’s 2022 and every other week another idol gets called out for doing smth problematic, it makes me think companies and idols truly will never understand that they’re now in the eye of the whole world which consists of different cultures and their actions will hurt people. i also believe a reason why kpop isn’t as enjoyable anymore is bc of the obsession over numbers. i personally never participated in any streaming, if i like a song i will listen to it but i won’t force myself to repeatedly watch an mv just so my faves can get an achievement no one outside the fandom cares about, or so they can win a useless award at a music show that they won’t do anything with anyways. like the pressure around having to stream your faves otherwise you’re not a real fan is bizarre to me. like i wajt to go on the internet to see people’s opinions on the song, not how many views they got in an hour?

i also realised i’ve been extending watching MV’s for a few months (there are literally some releases from groups i listen to from last year that i still haven’t heard 💀) I don’t know it just kinda makes me sad that kpop has made me feel so exhausted

despite all that i know i won’t ever be able to stop keeping up with nct and svt like i’m attached to them in a sense 💀 like i love them on a different level. sorry for the rant just kinda felt upset that we’ve come to this point (I BLAME 4th GEN STANS)

— nura who is the biggest crosaint <3

i have never ever related with something more like i have with this EVER. bcos its true.

these idols arent really redeeming themselves, seeing as many "locals" and "outsiders" already disapprove of them. like, yes, i wholly understand that korea is ery conservative and one-way with their (especially) societal views, but we're growing up in a generation where we are becoming mre open and understanding to certain idealogies, but nooooooooooo. kpop idols have backtracked their minds to the 19th century and still think that fatshaming and being racist is funny.

as for the numbers, whew, it has a been a prolonged problem in the whole community, to the point where ppl would ONLY stream a song just for views and statistics, for a chance that their faves would win a (truly pointless and trivial) award, which is most undoubtedly rigged anyways.

my interest in kpop is diminishing but i soooo want to stay for nct and p1h 😭😭

[arhvste]

002 SAKUSA KIYOOMI X SHUT UP AND DRIVE SERIES

++ MSBY GARAGE

❝ get you where you wanna go, if you know what i mean, got a ride that’s smoother than a limousine ❞

dt — @omisluvr i hope you like this, i had a lot of fun writing about you and your husband <3

warnings — nsfw : oral [recieving]

“what the fuck were you even thinking when you said yes to him anyway?”

sakusa pinched the bridge of his nose as he stood in the doorway of his high rise apartment. you were looking up at him, eyes glossy and hair drenched. your skin soaked not just from the rain, but from the fresh, hot tears that had run down your face as your hands scrunched the hem of your soaking sweater, the material quickly growing uncomfortable to wear.

the outside hitter sighed before stepping out the way to let you in.

“stay there.” his deep voice rang through your ears as he left to grab you a fresh towel to use.

you stood there, glancing around the sleek apartment as the city lights from down below leaked softly through the windows emitting a soft glow around the room. moments later, you heard footsteps approach as your eyes flickered over to the hallway.

sakusa strode over to you, handsome features highlighted and sharpened under the dim lights. sticking his hand out, he dropped the plush white towel into your awaiting arms as a plastic bag. you looked up at him confused regarding the bag, but before you could ask, he cut straight in.

“strip.”

“excuse me?” you choked out as you stared at the man in disbelief.

“you’re excused.” he muttered bluntly as you wiped your face with the warm towel. “you’re all wet. strip here and go shower and then we’ll talk.” he finished as he turned to leave you standing, dripping wet on the doormat of the entrance.

sakusa walked down the hall towards the bathroom and began to run the hot water and ensure the vents were working for you. having him out of sight, you sniffled and began to peel the wet clothing off your body and toss it into the plastic bag you’d dropped onto the floor. after stripping bare, you wrapped the inviting towel around your cold body and padded towards the bathroom. sakusa had left the light on and had already heated the water for you to prevent any time wasted.

you dropped the plastic bag on top of the white wicker laundry basket and stepped into the wet room style shower. the cool tiles beneath your feet caused shivers to run through your body as you turned the tap on for hot water to flow out.

as a fresh wave of hot water flooded down you, so did a fresh set of hot tears. you did your best to hold back the sobs you’d been keeping in, but it was all too much now.

‘better get it out now before talking.’ you thought as you let the tears flow freely down your face.

luckily, sakusa kept an array of various shower products so you knew you wouldn't have to come out the shower smelling like a six foot plus man who’d had a shower at the gym. after knowing sakusa for so many years, you knew he was picky about his products and you were eternally grateful for his favoured and toned-down scent of ‘ocean waves’.

lathering the soap across every inch of your now warming skin, your sobs slowed down and your breathing less jagged. your chest still hurt, but whether that was your crying causing chest ache or your now-ex causing heart break, you didn’t care anymore. you saw the end of your already deteriorating relationship approaching from a mile away anyway. if anything, you were partially thankful it had come crashing down, ending the anticipation that kept you on edge everyday. you just didn’t think it would actually hurt.

rinsing the soap off and feeling a bit better, you stepped away from the shower head as the water came to a halt. grabbing the fresh towel sakusa had left waiting for you on the radiator, you dried yourself as much as you could before wrapping the towel tightly around your body and stepping out the steaming room.

wandering through the dim hallway, you peeped into sakusa’s room as he scrolled through his phone, slouched on the king sized bed adorned with a firm, but certainly luxury mattress.

you knocked gently as his eyes snapped up at you. his expression still agitated looked, but softening at the sight of you.

“i don't have any spare clothes.” you murmured quietly, stepping into his clean and immaculately kept room.

he hummed before getting off the bed and rummaging through his own drawers. you stood there glancing around all of his medals and trophies won from years of playing in highschool and now pro. you had been present when he had won multiple of these awards. you happened to be one of the lucky few allowed close to sakusa. yes, you had known each other from a young age, but sakusa was ruthless in the sense of cutting people off; you had been someone exempt from that treatment though.

after a few moments, sakusa grunted with a pair of sweats in his hand as he looked down at your damp form.

you were taken aback slightly because despite sakusa slowly becoming more comfortable with personal boundaries, particularly in the recent years, you still grew slightly shocked everytime he willingly loaned you something of his own.

“thanks.” you whispered as you took the dry clothes and headed over to his en suite bathroom.

locking the door behind you, you quickly threw the sweats on and inhaled the natural scent that had rubbed off onto the clothes. sakusa smelt expensive in your opinion. yes, it was his natural scent, but anyone could tell he was a man of serious selfcare just from the scent of his clothes alone.

satisfied with your dry attire, you hung the towel on the radiator before switching off the light and stepping back into sakusa’s bedroom.

the sweats were definitely too big for you, but he had done his best to find one of his older sets in hopes of them perhaps fitting you a little more and for the sake of his own comfort knowing you weren’t wearing any clothes he’d regularly wear and fear catching too many external germs onto. you smiled weakly at him upon catching eye contact as he sighed and patted beside him on the bed.

staying close friends with the germaphobe had definitely benefited you as you had only grown closer to the pro-volleyballer over the years, allowing the two of you to naturally grow physically closer too. there’s not a lot of people in the world sakusa would’ve allowed for them to shower, wear his clothes and especially not sit on his bed, but once again, you were exempt from that, you always were; and he knew why.

“so,” he began, cutting through the thick tension lingering. “what happened exactly.”

always so straight to the point. maybe running to sakusa immediately wasn't the best choice.

“he cheated.” you spoke dryly as sakusa’s frown grew deeper.

“explain.” he pressed as you felt your chest increasingly tighten.

“i showed up to his house and-” your eyes watered as tears began to spill out. opening your mouth to continue, you struggled as no noise came out. scrunching your eyes up in frustration, you sobbed once more but stopped as you felt a warm hand take in your own.

you looked up through blurred vision as sakusa had a firm, but sincere look on his face. tightening his grip slightly on your hand, you shakily breathed out before continuing.

“the door was unlocked, i went in and i saw.”

“saw what?”

“her. the girl he told me not to worry about. the one he promised me was nothing more than a friend.”

sakusa scoffed as you sighed warily, tears dripping down your chin.

“they were um- you know-”

“-having sex. yes, i get the idea.” sakusa quipped as your heart dropped.

“um, yeah. i just left and well, here i am.” you laughed bitterly, face wet once more and vision blurred.

“what a fucking loser.” sakusa spat out bitterly as you hung your head low.

“i don't even know why you said yes to him. what the hell does he even have going for him? tell me what exactly it is that he brings to the table, i’ve been dying to know.”

you looked up as sakusa’s hand held yours tightly.

sakusa looked almost as hurt as you did. you quickly put that idea to bed and assumed it was natural protectiveness. he was your best friend after all. you just didn’t know just how badly he had wanted more than that though.

“he was just- he was just there i guess. someone for me to date. maybe i was just lonely, i don’t know. i, fuck- i dont know omi! i dont fucking know anymore!” you sobbed as sakusa’s eyes softened.

“well. what are you gonna do now?” he spoke sharply, eyes fixated on you.

“nothing i guess. i’ll get over it, i knew it was bound to end anyway.”

“and running to me was your first option?”

“are you really that surprised? i just didn’t know who else to go to.”

sakusa sighed before standing up and urging you to stand up with him.

“where are we going?” you asked, begrudgingly standing up beside his toned form.

“to take you out. i’m not having you soak my sheets with tears caused by a loser.”

“but i’m not dressed for that!” “we’re staying in the car for the most part.” he confirmed, notioning for you to follow him back to the front door where his car keys were left.

you sighed but followed suit as sakusa grabbed one of his own sweaters to put on. looking back at you, sakusa noticed your down expression as his own heart tugged slightly. he could only hope you’d perk up by the time he’d taken you to where he intended. he almost felt bad. almost.

you huffed but followed sakusa out the apartment behind him and waited as he locked the door swiftly behind him. trailing sadly behind him towards the elevator, sakusa watched as your miserable state wallowed in sadness behind him.

waiting for you to get over the damage caused seemed pointless in his opinion. ever the efficient one, sakusa knew exactly how he wanted to go about getting you over your ex faster. he could only hope you’d cooperate with him.

the ride in the elevator with the occasional sniffle from you occupying the majority of the silence. at last, the elevator had reached below ground level and into the underground parking lot for residents to use.

you followed the man out the elevator and stayed close to him and the two of you headed over to sakusa’s reserved parking space. you heart picked up slightly upon locking your eyes onto sakusa’s car.

a matte black aston martin DB11 was parked perfectly into its designated space. the tinted windows showed you back your own reflection as you were met with the sight of your downcast face. brushing stray strands of hair out of your face, you sighed and waited for sakusa to unlock the car for you to get in.

to you, getting into the pro players car was no big deal, you were simply getting into a friends car for a casual outing. to anyone else, this would’ve been a huge deal though. nobody was allowed in sakusa kiyoomi’s car. he denied requests to drop off and pick up others and even teammates. the only exceptions from this rule were yourself and komori. nobody else.

sakusa unlocked the car and you clicked the door open on the passenger side. immediately, your nose was met with the heavy scent of air freshener and leather. the clean and polished interior never failed to impress you every time you rode with sakusa.

the outside hitter climbed into his own seat before shutting his door and waiting for you to shut your own. the leather of the seat cool under your sweats. shivers ran up your spin and the cold temperature car started up at the press of a button.

“strap in.” sakusa glanced over at you before fastening his own seatbelt and looking into the mirror to back the car up safely.

“hold still for a sec.” sakusa muttered as you felt his hand land on your shoulder as he looked back. his body close to yours, sakusa swiftly swung the car out his space as your breath hitched. why the hell did he have to get so close?

“you could’ve held the back of my seat.” you looked over at him as he revved the engine ready to speed out the exit.

“yeah you’re right, i could’ve. i just didn’t want to.” and with that, sakusa hit the acceleration and the car sped out the clear exit at high speed.

your head was thrown back and your heart fluttered at his words but you kept quiet as you tried to calm your nerves. sakusa however, looked like he was out to kill. you were just thankful the roads were clear in the late night.

his jaw tense and eyes sharp, sakusa made no mistakes as he swerved in and out of lanes so cleanly, leaving other drivers with no reason to complain.

“where are we even going?” you spoke up meekly as the man beside you pulled up at a red light. clicking his tongue in annoyance of the hold up, sakusa tilted his head to face you, his wavy mop of hair flopping back as his salient eyes met your own, throwing your heart off course.

“you’ll see.” was all he said as the light flashed amber. head snapping back to the front, sakusa revved his engine once more, hands both tightly gripped the finely stitched leather of the wheel. prominent veins running down the back of his hand, sakusa flexed his fingers before gripping the wheel once more and slamming back down on the accelerator throwing your head back into the headrest for the second time of the night.

if looks could kill, you were certain any driver in your best friends field of vision would’ve been dead at least two times over. you had no idea why he was so angry, but you’d be lying if you said you didn't find him at least slightly attractive. you just couldn't bring yourself to fully admit it though. you were fresh out of an awful break up and the heartache was still there even if sakusa was capable of effortlessly throwing you into a fit of excitement.  

you gazed out the window as the car sped along the highway as pulled off the main roads and into the more separated streets. you paid no attention to where it was you were going until a wave of familiarity washed over you. your stomach tightened and your eyes flashed in fear as you quickly turned to see sakusa as focused as before, pulling into a parking space resided along the street of houses next to it.

“what the fuck kiyoomi! why are we here”

“where else would i take you?”

“oh i don't know, 7-11 maybe?!” you huffed as sakusa scrunched his face in disgust.

“that’s not going to help you get over him. this will.”

sakusa nodded towards the houses outside. more specifically, your ex's house.

“i can’t do this, i don’t need this.”

“you can and you want to don’t you?

you stared at him in disbelief as you shook your head.

“not like this, not now.”

“look at me.” sakusa demanded as his hand reached up to cup the side of your face, pulling your gaze directly onto his face.

“he’s a fucking loser. you’ve cried over him enough already and i just can’t sympathise with you anymore, show him that he fucked up.”

you opened your mouth to speak but no words came out. once again, shaking your head, you pulled away from sakusa’s grip as he stared at you confused.

“how? how can i just confront him in this state? you don't understand omi! it still hurts, and i can’t just-”

“-it hurt me too. this whole time it hurt.” sakusa cut in swiftly.

“ever since you said yes to him, i couldn’t understand why it hurt until recently. maybe i should’ve been happy for you. i just couldn’t though. i don’t like him, i never did and you know what? he didn’t deserve you, but i think i do.” he confessed, expression sincere and voice clear and sharp.

“kiyoomi i-”

“-don’t answer me now. it’s not fair of me to just throw something like that at you, i’m sorry but i’m also really not. i’ve been waiting to say this. just please, don’t let yourself fall off over someone like him okay?” he turned away, one hand still firmly gripping the wheel as his other hand reached to start the engine again to drive you both back. your hand intercepted though, stopping him from starting the ignition.  

“you’re right, i’m sorry. i promise i won’t so, let me prove it to you.” sakusa turned to face you and raised an eyebrow at your sudden change of attitude.

“i don’t want to cry anymore. not over him, not when i knew it was approaching sooner or later.” you admitted looking up at him. eyes glinting under the dim lights the streetlights provided through the tinted windows.

“then don’t let him make you cry anymore.” sakusa breathed out, voice taking on a soft tone.

“i’m relying on you to keep me in check then.” you whispered slowly leaning into him and letting him meet you halfway.

“well, don’t you worry your pretty little head about that.” his final words muttered out as his slender fingers ran under your jawline as he tilted his head up to meet his own. eyes fluttering shut, sakusa mentally thanked whoever the fuck was looking out for him, because he’d been waiting for this moment for longer than he’d ever care to admit.

pressing his lips onto your own, sakusa’s heart ran laps as you gasped at the feeling his hands gripping your jaw tighter. humming in satisfaction, he deepened the quickly escalating kiss as he pulled you closer and closer to him. god, he just couldn't have you close enough to him.

sliding his hand down to your thighs, sakusa felt the way you had them tightly pressed together as the slow and languid kiss quickly heated with each whine he drew from your lips. growing greedy to hear more, sakusa dominated the kiss completely, teeth scraping along your bottom lip ever so gently, drawing a sharp gasp from your throat. with your lips slightly parted, sakusa slipped his tongue into your mouth groaning at your responsiveness to his actions.

pulling away, he left you gasping but gave you no time to catch your breath as his lips strayed from your own and you felt his hot breath teasing the warm skin of your neck. not wasting another moment, sakusa let his canines dance along your sensitive skin, teasing you and leaving you unaware of his every next move. finally, letting his teeth drag along your collarbone for so long, sakusa kissed, sucked and bit everywhere he had access too. he needed to mark you as his. it would give him enough mental confirmation that you were finally his and you seemed to have no obligation to this in the slightest.

“omi, i can’t-” you whined, frustration building up as the clothes you were wearing now became more and more of a bother.

“i got you princex.” sakusa grunted, shifting his body away ever so slightly.

“please!” you groaned, glaring at the now smirking man.

“whatever happened to ‘i can’t do this’?” he mocked relishing in the control he had over you.

“i didn’t think you meant this!” you whined as sakusa pulled himself off of you momentarily. looking down at your hot and bothered state he felt a wave of pride hit. he did that to you.

“backseat.” he demanded notioning behind him.

“what?” you breathed out.

“you heard. backseat.” you grumbled but obliged regardless, climbing into the backseats of the luxury car. sakusa followed suit and hovered over your aching body as you rested your head against the doors tinted window, waiting for sakusa to do something, anything.

“so obedient.” he sighed trailing his fingers along the waistband of the already loose sweats, hands slowly slipping under the material, tugging them off painfully slow, much to your impatience.

your breathing stuttered as the man pressed a soft trail of kisses along your now exposed thighs, the temperature of the car only increasing as the air got thicker and thicker.

“please.” you whispered as his kisses met the ache between your legs.

eyes lustfully looking up at you, sakusa smiled against the skin of your inner thigh, breath hitting dangerously close to where you needed his attention the most.

“since you asked so nicely.” he praised, fingers hooking under the thin waistband of your soaked through panties. pulling them down, his eyes flickered up to meet your own. a look of sincerity glinted in his eyes as you nodded at him, permitting him to grant what you both wanted, what you both needed. you wanted this as much as he did and he’d be a fool to pass up an opportunity like this. the opportunity to show you what you could’ve had from the start, none of that mattered now though. you could his now, he’d make up for all the time lost, starting with now.

gasping at the sudden feeling of his tongue dipping into your slit, sakusa’s confidence only built up knowing you were comfortable with this. the warmth of his tongue causing you squeeze your eyes shut as shivers ran up and down your spine. fully trusting himself now, sakusa worked his mouth on your clit, hungrily chasing the desperate pleads ands gasps he’d quickly grown attached to. he needed to draw more of these out of you and he’d do just that.

toying with your clit with his tongue, sakusa groaned at the feeling of your hands quickly grabbing the base of his hair, tugging him closer and closer in desperate attempts to get him to go deeper. he made it his aim to get you just as hooked onto the feeling of intimacy as he was and you seemed to be following suit perfectly.

“k-kiyoomi!” you gasped, tugging harder at the dark strands tightly gripped between your fingers. his eyes flashed up at you, an almost unreadable expression shown as he pulled away momentarily. “you’re so beautiful you know,” he sighed before moving his mouth back down to your twitching core “so fucking beautiful.” he praised as he glanced up to memorize each pleasured expression that twisted across your face. he felt so proud knowing he was the one doing this to you, only he could make your eyes roll back the way he did, only he could draw out those pretty sounds that escaped your lips. he knew he was the only one capable because he knew he was always the better choice for you, he was better than your ex in every single way and he was just relieved he was finally getting the chance to prove it to yourself.

completely encasing your core between his lips once more, he swallowed everything you gave him so selfishly, refusing to let anything go to waste and spill onto the seats, it’s not like he could let anything go to waste anyway, not when you tasted this fucking good and certainly not when you were in his clean car.

“o-omi, more!” you chanted as sakusa grunted as you felt the knot inside of you progressively tighten. firm fingers gripping your hips, sakusa curled his tongue inside of you making sure to lap up everything he got out of you. you whined and chanted sakusa’s name like a mantra as he continued to worship your body with his mouth.

“please, please, please!” you recited desperately over and over again as you felt yourself closer to the edge.

“so good for me.” sakusa praised pulling away and loosening his grip on you, your arousal coating his chin. keeping one hand firmly gripped onto your waist, he moved his other hand down for his fingers to pinch and toy with the bud as his tongue quickly dipped back into your tight pussy as you felt your high quickly chase up on you.

“f-fuck!” you cried out as you felt your back arch as the ecstasy crashed down on you. his actions didn’t stop though, as his thumb continued to circle your clit with slow but firm movements only further forcing your mind to go blank. mindless babbles dribbled out your mouth as you slowly came down from your peak, sakusa continued to let every drop of arousal spill into his mouth before he pulled away panting.

face flushed, but satisfied, he caught his own breath and waited for you to fully come back to your senses. your own breathing once again jagged, you looked up at him shyly as you leaned forward to rest your head against his.

“s-shit, i didn’t think it would go this far.” sakusa admitted, grabbing a tissue from the side compartment to wipe his face. a look of disgust flashed momentarily on his face when he saw the mess on the tissue, but silently praising himself for keeping his car free from any spills onto the plush leather seats.

you laughed breathily before fluttering your eyes shut.

“i knew coming to see you was a good idea.”

“you didn’t know this was going to happen, fuck, i didn’t even know this was going to happen. i only brought you here to confront him.” the dark haired male sighed before pulling away from you.

the two of you stayed like that for a few moments, a comfortable silence lingering in the compressed air of the car. you hadn’t verbally confirmed it yet, but sakusa knew from this moment onwards you were finally his. a blissful feeling bubbled up inside of him as he processed what had just happened.

suddenly, a loud tap on the window caused the two of you to jolt in shock as you instinctively gripped the hem of the disregarded sweats in attempts to cover your exposed body. leaning over to the front drivers seat, sakusa peered at the window and was met with the furious face of your ex. scoffing, he slid into the driver's seat and let the window roll down to come face to face with the man you called your boyfriend several hours prior to what had just happened.

“what the fuck are you doing here?” you ex spat in anger as sakusa glared back equally as bitter.

“enjoying myself.” sakusa boredly stated as your ex’s face twisted into an expression of horror upon noticing you climbing back over to the front passenger seat with your clothes now back on, but appearance definitely disheveled.

“with that bitch?” the man outside of the car hissed as sakusa blocked his view.

“first of all, that so-called bitch? mine now, should’ve been from the start actually and secondly, get your disgusting presence away from my car, i’ve already had it deep cleaned this week and thanks to you, it’s gonna have to go back to be cleaned thoroughly again.”

your ex scoffed before backing up slightly.

“whatever, get the fuck out of my parking space though, and you,” he started past sakusa and directly into your eyes. “this makes you just as bad as me now so get off your high-horse.”

“actually,” you spoke up, hand resting on sakusa’s forearm to calm his peaking rage. “it doesn’t. kiyoomi was just a friend throughout the entirety of our relationship, he should’ve been the one to have been more than that though. it was never you.” you spoke briskly and cooly as sakusa smirked beside you.

before your ex could even open his mouth, sakusa let the windows slam but up before pressing the ignition.

“let’s just get out of here, you’re tired and it’s been a long day for you.” he offered a small smile as you nodded. outside, your ex was still yelling and begging for answers as the two of you took no notice. firing the engine back up, sakusa didn’t bother looking back before slamming onto the acceleration and speeding the two of you back through the streets and onto the main highway to take you back to his apartment where the two of you had things to talk about.

there was a lot lingering in the both of your minds, but you were certain the two of you were finally on the same page.

sakusa was upset you were hurt, but it didn’t matter now. you were his and over time, he’d help build you back up again, hand in hand, he wanted to put the time and effort into you that he had been wanting to do from the very start.

there weren’t a lot of people sakusa kiyoomi allowed close to him, would go out of his way for, would even care about for that matter, but as always, each and every time, you were exempt from that.

++ TAGLIST! @crescenttooru @miss-angel-ash @sarahvvictoria @babierin @omisluvr @s0utien @toobsessedsstuff @omibaby @kenkodzu @sugabeaniee @lovesunas @slutawara @bunny-on-crack @shouyouorange @memorableminds @whootwhoot @yikes-buddy @sweetsamus

[blu-joons]

Worlds Apart ~ Kim Namjoon

Your smile was forced as Namjoon came home, placing the list of nominations BTS had received for the MAMAs in front of you. When the question came, intrigued by how many nominations your group had received, you could only shake your head.

Whilst you loved how proud he was of himself, and the boys, you couldn’t help but feel so far off the mark, having barely received any recognition despite releasing your album earlier in the year.

“I’ve got some things to be getting on with,” you smiled as Namjoon sat down beside you. His eyebrows furrowed, confused as to why you stood up, almost as quickly as he sat down.

“What?” He questioned, but you’d already began to walk away from him.

Your feet raced up the stairs and into your bedroom, sitting yourself down on the end of the bed. Your hands ran through your hair, biting down on your bottom lip to try and keep yourself composed, desperately trying to push the feeling of disappointment to one side.

“What’s going on?” A voice soon asked however, following you into the room in search of answers.

Your eyes didn’t move as Namjoon moved to sit alongside you once again, this time wrapping his arms around your waist before you had the chance to escape. You knew Namjoon meant well, he wasn’t to know how bothered you were by his success.

You didn’t want to be bothered by it either, but it always seemed to follow you around. Everyone knew you as the less successful idol in your relationship, the one who would never be able to reach the heights that Namjoon and the boys had done.

“I told you that I’ve got things to do Namjoon, please.”

“Is that why I came up here to find you just sitting on the bed? That doesn’t seem like much of a job.”

You let go of a deep breath, trying to keep yourself calm and not take anymore of your own disappointments out on Namjoon. “I know that I should be happy for you right now, you’ve done really well, but I just can’t be happy. You’re doing so well, and I’m just…not.”

His left hand moved up to cup the side of your face, drawing your eyes across to look at him. “That’s why you’re upset? Because you didn’t get nominated? Y/N, nominations aren’t important, awards shows are pointless anyway, you shouldn’t get upset about it.”

“It’s not just nominations, it’s in everything that we do as idols.”

The MAMAs were the catalyst you needed to finally let go, the pent-up frustration of constantly being compared, frequently being reminded that you’d never match up, no matter how hard you, or your other group members tried.

“You know that I think you and the girls are amazing, you’ve done so well this year,” he comforted, pressing a kiss to the side of your head. “And I don’t ever compare you to us.”

“Everyone else does though,” you sighed, tilting your head back to the sky. “We’re worlds apart, you’ll always be the superstar, and I’ll be the one that’s successful because of who you are.”

Namjoon’s head shook instantly, feeling his heart break as he listened to you berate yourself. Even if there were differences between your careers, both of them were still successful.

His eyes continued to stare into yours, “there’s plenty of things that your group is better at than us. For starters, your choreography is always a lot sharper than any of ours is.”

“But no one cares about choreography, it’s the music show wins, the daesangs, that’s what matters to people these days,” you pointed out to him, “that’s what success is based on, right?”

For some time, he’d been able to tell that something wasn’t right with you, but as he placed the piece of paper in front of you, he knew straight away what the root of the problem was, although a little unsure on how to fix things.

“If it counts for anything, I think you’re incredibly successful, and I’m very proud of everything you’ve achieved this year. I think the MAMAs are crazy for not having you guys nominated too.”

Your eyes rolled as his smile grew, desperate to get you smiling back at him too, and put a stop to you being so unnecessarily hard on yourself too.

“I get that right now you probably feel you’re on a different level to where BTS are, but I promise you, that’s not true,” he comforted, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “We’ve been there too, I know how you feel, and I know how hard it often is to force a smile onto your face, when really, you’re terribly disappointed.”

“It just feels like another rung on the ladder for people to climb up when they want to mock me for dating you. Do you know how often people stop me in the streets to remind me how successful you are?”

Whilst Namjoon was aware that a few fans liked to make you feel inferior in comparison to his own successes, he never imagined that it would get to you. You always gave off such a strong vibe, when in reality, you were struggling, which at last he could see too.

“There’s always going to be people who like to separate us and compare how we’ve done, but honestly, looking at where we both are right now, I think we’re both incredibly successful. And I don’t just mean with our careers, but look at our lives, together. I think this moment right here is by far my biggest success in life.”

At last, the smile that Namjoon had been hoping for finally appeared on your face. You knew how true his words were, and how he always knew exactly the right thing to say to make you smile.

Even if many knew that Namjoon was just saying what he said to make you feel better, by the tone of his voice, you knew how sincere he was too. Whilst he loved his career and everything that came with it, what he loved the most, was coming home to you every night and knowing he had you there to support him.

“I’m proud of you, no matter what,” he continued to speak, “even if this might feel like a kick in the teeth right now, when you look back, you’ll know you’ve had a successful year.”

“I guess, the album did do better than the company predicted,” you recalled, “that was quite a nice feeling to be able to brag about in our meetings.”

His head nodded with a chuckle, “there you go. It’s all about little things, the little successes are what’s most important, and you’ve achieved plenty of them this year.”

The two of you stayed tucked up in your embrace for a few moments, enjoying the silence and the small celebrations that had come with the year you’d had. Eventually, Namjoon leaned back, but not before pressing a kiss to the top of your head.

“What about all of those jobs you said you had to do?” He quizzed, earning himself a light slap against the chest from you.

“You know full well that I just used that as an excuse to get away from you,” you scolded, “don’t even try and play dumb with me.”

“I’m never letting you get away that easily.”

---

Masterlist

[peridot-dreams]

beautiful people | shawn mendes

Shawn sees a familiar face at the awards show, and learns the value of realness.

The setting sun leaves the Hollywood sky pink and full of possibilities. Shawn finds himself looking out the window at it, still in a daze after the events that had unfolded that day. He’d won several awards for a song he was proud of. He thinks of the look on his parents’ faces in the audience when his name was announced and smiles. That’s who I do this all for, he thinks to himself.

His limousine rolls up the venue. It’s already teeming with people, Lamborghinis, and cameras. Shawn is used to such commotion, but the second he opens the car door, he’s bombarded with excessive noise - noise so loud that he can barely hear himself think.

He’s still riding his post-awards high when he walks in, still dressed in the same red carpet outfit as before. He has a girl on his arm, but not by choice - rather, an unfortunate PR stunt planned terribly and executed even worse. He greets his celebrity friends as he passes by, offering a small smile and a thank you when they congratulate him on his win.

He’s just about to ask the girl on his arm if she’d like to come with him to the drink bar when he sees a flash of silver in the corner of his eye. Shawn realizes who had just walked past him; he feels his heart began to pound in his chest and his breathing gets shallow. “Sorry, can I go to the bathroom?” he tells the girl on his arm, not bothering to wait for a response. He detaches himself and follows the silver blur, around a corner and into a dark hallway.

The silver blur is standing in the dark, scrolling aimlessly on her phone. Shawn sighs and takes in the sight: the silver dress on her is absolutely stunning. Her hair and her makeup is perfect; he feels lost in her presence, stunned by her beauty. He’s never seen her like this, and it only adds to the pain of it all. His mother had once said that losing a best friend is worse than a break up and right now he completely understands what his mother meant.

“Y/N,” he breathes. When she looks up, he feels like running away - she’s looking at him as if he’s the dirt under her silver heels. He wishes she would stop, that she would run to him and hug him and make everything alright between them again. She’s standing right in front of him but he misses her, misses everything about their friendship and support for each other.

“What do you want, Mendes?” she mutters under her breath. She turns her attention back to her phone, tapping her toe incessantly. Shawn can’t stand the sound of her heel hitting the ground because he remembers that she tends to fidget when she’s upset; the clacking sound is only a reminder of their friendship that had crashed and burned for reasons Shawn still fails to understand.

“Why do you hate me so much?” Shawn blurts out. “I don’t get it, Y/N. We used to be best friends, and one day you just started hating me and I still don’t understand why.”

“Because,” Y/N spits, shoving her phone into her bag. “Because you’re like them now.”

“Who’s ‘them’?”

“All those fake people out there!” Y/N exclaims, her eyes glancing over to the party-goers with a disgusted look plastered on her face. Shawn feels her gaze coming back to him, judging and critical. He feels like he could wither under her stare like a plant in a drought. “Shawn, you’ve changed. You used to be so down to earth, so genuine, but now you’re caught up in the money and fame and corporate bullshit.”

“Am not!” Shawn crosses his arms as he unconsciously clenches his teeth. “That’s such bull-”

“Shawn, you’re the epitome of fake. You’re in a fucking PR relationship.”

“W-What-”

“Don’t even try to argue. It’s so obvious and even your fans know what’s going on.”

Shawn closes his eyes. He wishes that he could argue with her, but arguing in the dark hallway outside of an after party wasn’t the ideal setting to do so. From the outside looking in, he knows it looks like he’s changed but he needs her to know that it’s not true. He needs his best friend back in his life again.

“Look,” Shawn speaks, taking a deep breath. “Let’s ditch this party. I know you don’t like these kinds of events anyway, so I don’t even know why you’re here…”

“My manager made me come.”

“Right. Whatever, let’s just sneak out. Let’s hang out like we used to, okay? I’ve missed you.”

“Don’t you need to get back to fake-dating your ‘girlfriend’?” Y/N snaps, giving Shawn the most sarcastic air quotes she can muster.

“No, fuck that,” he says. Against his better judgment, he takes her hand in his. He’s relieved when she doesn’t try to yank her hand back. “Let’s just go.”

✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Thirty minutes later, Shawn finds himself sitting across from Y/N at a dingy old diner on the other side of Hollywood. He watches as she twirls the straw in her chocolate milkshake. She hasn’t said more than three words to him since they left the party, and Shawn feels like trying to salvage their friendship is pointless at this point. Shawn knew from their now-dead friendship that Y/N was a champion at holding grudges - he just never expected to find himself at the other end of one.

“So how’ve you been?” Shawn asks softly. He wants to kick himself for how awkward and nervous he sounds, but he hopes that Y/N will take his nerves as a sign of his genuine interest in rekindling their friendship.

“Fine,” she mumbles. She takes a tiny sip of her chocolate shake. “Slow year.”

Shawn knows that isn’t true. He Googles her name every few weeks and watches every single interview she appears in on YouTube. Y/N’s acting career had taken off in the past few years, and she’d been getting tons of lead roles in TV shows and movies lately. He always gets a pang of jealousy in the pit of his stomach when he sees pictures of her with friends on Instagram, because he knows full well that it could have been him travelling the world with her, experiencing new things with her.

He doesn’t tell her that he’s been keeping tabs on her. “Yeah,” Shawn mutters. “Okay.”

The tension in the air could be cut with a knife. It doesn’t help that the diner is completely empty, save for the old man who owns it and is busy complaining about how “millenials are killing the restaurant business” under his breath. Shawn tries to focus on the owner’s mutterings, desperately wanting to think about something other than the fact that Y/N is totally not into him or the conversation that he’s been trying to keep going.

“I don’t hate you, by the way.”

Shawn’s head snaps up to look at her, eyes wide with shock. “Well, you stopped talking to me out of the blue, so I just assumed you did.”

“Well, I don’t.” She stops twirling her milkshake straw and drops her hands into her lap. She meets his gaze, eyes still hard and lips pressed together in a straight line. “You’ve just...changed.”

“I think we’ve both changed.”

“No.” She shakes her head, letting out an indignant laugh. Shawn winces at the sharpness of her tone. “You’re the one who started doing brand deals, ripping off fans with overpriced tickets and merch, signing PR contracts and betraying your fans…”

“Y/N.” Shawn’s hands are starting to shake; he rubs his thighs over his jeans in an attempt to calm himself down. Her words are cutting deeper than a knife; he can barely stand it.

“You’ve completely betrayed your fans, Shawn. You’ve sold them out to every company that has approached you, taken advantage of their trust. Damn it Shawn, you’re even endorsing overpriced water now, like how stupid is-”

“That wasn’t fucking me!” Shawn slams his hand on the table. The old man stops mumbling about millenials and looks in fear at the angry boy. Y/N is barely fazed, her hard glare still targeting Shawn.

“Oh really?” She narrows her eyes at him. “‘Cause your ass is everywhere these days, every time I turn on the TV-”

“Do you remember how my career started?”

Y/N stops for a second, but rolls her eyes immediately after. “Yeah, at some overpriced convention marketed towards prepubescent teenagers.”

“Before MAGCON,” Shawn interrupts. His eyes plead with her to understand, to see where he’s coming from. “I was just a kid, sitting in my room with a guitar. Singing cover songs and making six second videos even though no one was listening. Because I felt like it. Because it made me happy.”

“Yeah. I remember.”

“Yeah. That’s the happiest I’ve ever been in my life.” A sigh leaves Shawn’s mouth; his eyes drop to his lap as he tries to calm his shaking hands and voice. He’s never felt so heated in his life, like every emotion is about to burst out of his chest. “And then everything just took off and suddenly I was signing with a record label and being thrust into the public eye. I was just a small town kid from Canada, but suddenly people were starting to expect things from me.”

“Shawn-”

“No, please. Hear me out.” The suit on his body was tailored to be comfortable, but in the heat of his rant it feels like it’s suffocating him. “It all went so fast. It was just one song after another and interviews and TV shows and concerts and tours. Everything was just going by so fast and every day, I lost a piece of myself. I was on autopilot, and my team was just signing me up for everything and I would let myself be led by them. Even now, I just sign contracts without thinking and allow myself to be molded by people who only care about money.”

“Shawn, why didn’t you tell me any of this before?” Y/N’s eyes are soft now. She suddenly notices how tired he looks under the makeup that he was forced to wear to the awards event: his sunken eyes, the dark bags under them, the lines that furrowed into his skin between his eyebrows. He looks like he’s barely hanging on to life, like the walls are caving in and he’s been trying to hold them up. She wishes she would have noticed earlier how lifeless he looks. “We were best friends, you could have told me about this.”

“Because,” Shawn starts, holding back the sob forcing itself up his throat. “I can’t ever tell anyone because I don’t want to sound ungrateful. I’m grateful, I really am...I’m lucky to have my passion be my career. But I’m so tired, Y/N. I just want to go back to being that kid in his bedroom, playing guitar because he feels like it, not because he signed a contract or because someone else wants him to.” He closes his eyes, sighing, letting his head fall back slightly. He reminds himself to relax his shoulders and take deep breaths. “When I’m on stage, I get to go back to being happy for just a moment. I get to forget about everyone’s expectations, about contracts and brand deals and PR and all the bullshit. I get to be me. Completely free.”

She’s stunned and he knows it. He’s just unloaded all of the burdens he’s been carrying; Shawn doesn’t know how Y/N is going to react, but he feels lighter, he feels better. He just hopes, so desperately, that she’ll understand his brokenness and the wreckage that has been left in his mind as a result of the stress and anxiety of the last few years. He hopes that she’ll understand him for what he is, not what he appears to be.

“So I haven’t changed, Y/N. I’m not like them; I’m like you. Money and fame, it’s just not who we are.”

“Shawn, I’m so sorry.” Her tear-filled eyes move in a frenzy as she realizes the falsity of her words and accusations. “I should have realized that you felt this way and that you were struggling. I’m so sorry for severing our friendship and for not knowing what was going on.”

“No, it’s not your fault. I just…”

Shawn groans as he sees the group of people that have congregated outside the windows of the diner. They both gaze into the parking lot, bombarded by bright flashes and deafened by the sound of cameras shuttering.

“Fuck. It’s the paps.” Shawn groans again, head rolling back in frustration. “How did they find us?”

“They were following your famous ass,” Y/N says, laughing. Shawn smiles; he resists the urge to point out that she’s famous too, and has more followers than him on Instagram.

“Should we leave?” Shawn asks.

“Hell no. They want pics, let’s give them pics.” Shawn watches in awe as Y/N stands up on her seat despite the loud protesting of the owner. She starts waving at them crazily, her peace signs occasionally replaced by a middle finger.

“Fuck you!” she yells in between her laughs. Shawn grins; he finds himself copying her and standing on his own seat. He starts waving at the cameras, reveling in the flashes and dancing like an idiot to the music inside his head.

“Fuck you!” he yells. He’s never felt so liberated in his entire life. He starts posing with her, each pose more ridiculous than the prior. They pretend to tango on the table, screaming when they nearly topple over the edges. He twirls her around, smile growing bigger and bigger with each giggle that leaves her mouth. “It’s been two years and you still suck at dancing,” he cackles. She pretends to gasp, then sticks her tongue out at him and at the paps outside.

Before he realizes what he’s doing, his lips are on hers. She doesn’t kiss back at first, shocked, but when Shawn is about to pull away he feels her hands on the back of his head pulling him closer. Suddenly, there’s nothing else in the entire world besides her; they’re not standing on top of a diner table anymore. It’s like they’re floating and Shawn’s body is leaning into hers and he’s never felt so complete before. The smell of her conditioner makes him forget his own name and he realizes that her lips taste like chocolate and friends aren’t supposed to know how each other taste but he doesn’t care because it’s her and it’s always been her.

When they finally pull away, Shawn’s gasping for breath and Y/N’s eyes are as wide as saucers as she realizes what has just happened. “S-Shawn. Your PR contract…”

“Fuck the PR contract. Let’s give the world something real.” And their lips connect again, for the paparazzi cameras and the whole world to see.

[atsukashii]

this is such a cute little event 😭 and also as a bts stab of 4 years, welcome to the club, bby 🤩💜 anyways for the event; mamushi x katsuki + she/her + emerald green + ☀️ (thank you in advance!!)

every night and day i know you always stay

✘ formal events are definitely not your thing, and its a good thing that your boyfriend hates them just as much as you.

✘ GENRE: fluff

✘ WARNINGS: none

✘ WORD COUNT: 1.2k

“I know I said what I said,” You start taking a pointed sip from the glass of champagne in your hand. “But when I was talking about the perks of being a pro hero - this was not what I meant.” There’s a bark of deep laughter from beside you, and the figure turns towards you with an ash blonde eyebrow raised in mock confusion.

“You mean to say that when you were talking about how great it was being a pro hero, you weren’t talking about the black tie gala’s we’re contracted to attend?” Katsuki says sarcastically, and you have to physically stop yourself from flipping your boyfriend off.

“I was saying it in reference to free fucking ramen Katsu.” You hiss under your breath, letting your eyes roam over the full conference room, decked out for such a large scale event. You weren’t surprised at the carpeted walkway as you arrived, with a large banner wall on one side, and countless reporters and media paparazzi crowding the other. All for the annual ‘Hero Awards’, as if being a hero to actually save lives wasn’t enough of a reward.

The fact that it wasn’t even a charity event you were obligated to attend grated on you more than you let on. Why should heroes be rewarded even more for their work? It’s one of the most fulfilling, dangerous and draining jobs on the face of the planet, so yes, let's give some already egotistical bastards a blinding gold medal, because that's what we’re really needing to celebrate.

You take another sip of your drink, feeling Katsuki’s crimson eyes practically burn into the side of your head. You wait eagerly for him to say something, but instead, he simply takes another side step towards you and leans down, whispering in your ear.

“If you glare at the director of the event any harder, they’ll combust into flames.” You shift your gaze from the woman in mention, and give Katsuki an expressionless look, completely done with his pointless commentary.

“If anything’s going to be combusting around here, it will be one hundred percent your fault.” You snip back, but there’s no fire in it, and the traitorous smile that splays across your mouth that you can’t wipe away has your boyfriend chuckling quietly to himself.

“Well at least I got to see you like that,” He finishes, and even though you’ve been together for years, the brazen flash of his eyes as he unapologetically lets his gaze run down your figure and up again still makes your cheeks flush brightly. Another reason you despised this event was the fact that it was formal, meaning you had to force yourself to go out and search for a ballgown for a month beforehand. But you knew you looked good, mainly due to the fact that the man standing by your side’s eyes almost popped out of his head when you’d emerged from your bathroom earlier this evening ready to go. You were dripping in the emerald green fabric, and had been complimented all night on your dress by your close friends, however strangers stayed far away due to the glowering and protective number two pro hero at your side.

“Want to get out of here gorgeous?” Your eyes bug out as you look to Katsuki once more, and see that he’s one hundred percent serious. There’s a high possibility that you could get into deep shit for leaving this event, although you’d already mingled and thanked the director for your invitation which has been like pulling teeth. You knew Katsuki was in the running for an award like he had been every year, and the gold medal that was stuffed in his pocket must have been the final straw.

His crimson eyes sparkle at the possible trouble you could both get into, and you don’t fight the excitement and adrenaline that starts to thrum inside you.

“Please,” Is all you have to say, before Katsuki entwines his fingers with yours and leads you through the crowd. People part around him like the red sea, and you can’t help but feel pride at the confidence in his every step. He doesn’t care that people are seeing you leave, it’s as if he’s daring them to try and stop him. Instead, everyone just lets it happen, and Kirishima even waves to you as you leave.

It’s not until you’re sitting in the passenger seat of your boyfriend's ridiculous customised Ferrari that you finally feel yourself relaxing into the bucket seats. With graceful effortlessness like everything he does, Katsuki maneuvers the vehicle into the street before practically shooting off at the speed of light. You’ve given him plenty of crap about his choices of cars before, claiming there’s no point in owning one if you never have the chance to drive it, but Katsuki says simply that you’ve just explained the premise of owning one. So instead, you just lean back into the seat with closed eyes, listening to the familiar kpop song playing on the radio.

As the car slows to a stop a few minutes later, you open your eyes knowing that you’re definitely at home. Katsuki’s figure is enveloped with the bright lights of the convenience store and you raise an eyebrow at him. Why were you stopping here?

“I’m fucking starving,” he offers and opens his door. “Since they think its alright to feed pro heroes tiny fucking snacks and think that’s an appropriate meal.” Katsuki grumbles and you immediately get out of the vehicle, your grin not leaving your face. When you were in your last year of U.A, the two of you used to sneak out some nights and wander down to the closest family mart and buy instant ramen and candy before taking your time in going back to campus. The fact that he chose to come here instead of raiding the constantly full fridge has your heart thrumming happily inside your chest.

You’re sure that the two of you are a sight, dressed in formal wear and weaving through the isles, arms full of convenience store food. It all reminds you of your high school days so much, and you’re so full of nostalgia that you pull your boyfriend to a stop in front of the chocolates.

Katsuki eyes you in confusion, but you don’t give him the chance to respond before you lean forward and place a soft kiss to his lips. Katsuki’s free hand weaves roughly into your perfectly styled hair, holding you to him for a moment longer. Kissing Katsuki is like waking up in the morning, when your mind is still foggy with sleep but your body is moving before your brain. Every kiss from him renders you speechless, and has since he first kissed you in your dorm when you were teenagers.

Pulling back, you immediately laugh as the edge of your boyfriend’s mouth is speckled with dark red lipstick. You wipe it away with your thumb, and take a moment to engrave this moment into your mind forever. Dressed in all your finery in a convenience store, buying instant noodles with Katsuki.

“You’re everything to me,” you whisper so softly you don’t know if he heard it. But the fingers that come up to your face and gently pinch your chin signal that he did.

“Ditto gorgeous.”

a/n: thank you for the request anon, and deadass those boys have made me a simp.

✘ EVENT STATUS : CLOSED ✘

[may1996s]

All of Us are dead- a long POV

The emotions I went through watching All Of Us Are Dead is something I didn't expect. I know we are in the second month of 2022 but this series definitely deserves more than one award for being the series of the year (so far), it was great. The actors were incredible and not only the main ones but also the secondary ones and those who acted as zombies did great. I loved the story of each character, from the class president to Nayeon being the bitch that in the end you feel bad about her death, (I don't know if the same thing happened to you but her death really affected me more than Jimin's ), even when teacher Park was bitten I cried because she didn't deserve it, not to mention Cheongsan's mother OH MY GOD THAT WAS SO PAINFUL AND WHEN HE SAW HER THEN!!!!! IT HURT ME AS MUCH as Gyeonsu when he turned into a zombie. There was no break to collect myself because in the next episode another student became a zombie. There were two characters that I liked a lot, one was the girl who smoked, tough and bad on the outside but she suffered so much when her friend sacrificed himself for them as well as Joonyoung did, I don't know why but I liked seeing that, how it showed that everything affected her was not as bad and cold as it seemed. The second character that I liked was Suhyeok, he take care and was always ready to sacrifice himself for Namra, if in a zombie apocalypse I don't have someone like that by my side, I let the first zombie I see bite me. Cheongsan, MY KING HE DIDN'T DESERVE TO DIE REALLY NO, HE WAS AN EXCEPTIONAL LEADER HE ALWAYS MADE SURE EVERYONE IS WELL AND THAS HOW HE GOT PAID???? HE DIDN'T DESERVE THAT!!!! Another point to note is that the humor was not lacking in the series as well as the romance and both things were light, they did not focus much on that but they still made sure that both elements were perfect as well as the chemistry of friendship and love. What was between the characters, seeing how united they were was a plus that made the series more emotional, and speaking of chemistry: PARK SOLOM AND CHA YIHUN!!!!! I LIVE FOR NAMRA AND SUKHYEOK!! THE CHEMISTRY BETWEEN THE ACTORS WERE SO PERFECT. I hope they work on a romance drama together very soon because that chemistry is perfect. Finally, in case there is a second season I hope they don't screw it like they did with the sequel to Train to Busan, for god’s sake I don’t know if some of you saw the sequel to that movie but it was so boring and pointless. What I saw is that many have hope that cheonsan is alive, in my case I don't have it, I would like it but I feel that it was obvious that he died along with the insane bully. anyways, thanks for coming to my TED talk

[stargazer-sims]

11 - Shock Value

Davian: Félix, what are you doing?

Félix: I’m trying to decide what to pack.

Davian: That’s usually not a problem for you. What’s the matter?

Félix: I don’t know what to wear.

Davian: It’s gonna be hot in Oasis Springs. A lot hotter than here, so bring something light, I guess. And pick out a couple things that are cool and comfortable for when we’re in the car. It’s a long trip, and you know how you hate being all sticky and uncomfortable.

Félix: I meant, I don’t know what to wear to our appointment.

Davian: What about that blue dress with the purple flowers on it? You know, the one with the frills or whatever around the hem. You always look cute in that one.

Félix: I… I don’t think—

Davian: Fé, are you crying?

Félix: N-no.

Davian: Hey…. Turn around and look at me for a second.

Félix: I can’t.

Davian: Yes, you can. It’s okay. Why don’t we sit down for a minute, and you can tell me what’s really going on?

Félix: I’m sorry.

Davian: For what?

Félix: I’m not usually like this. This isn’t me.

Davian: Don’t worry about saying sorry. Tell me what’s wrong.

Félix: Do you think other people think I’m odd?

Davian: Probably.

Félix: Oh.

Davian: No… Félix, don’t cry, love. Please. I don’t think it’s a bad thing. You’re unique, and I like that.

Félix: I’m weird.

Davian: You’re vibrant and amazing. Anyway, since when do you care what anybody else thinks of you? One of the things I love about you is how confident you are, and how you always do your own thing regardless of anyone else’s opinion.

Félix: Other people’s opinions never mattered before.

Davian: And now they do?

Félix: Yes. No… not everyone’s. It’s only… I don't want certain people to get the wrong impression of me.

Davian: Which people? You mean the people at the clinic?

Félix: Yes.

Davian: They're not going to care what you're wearing.

Félix: But, what if they do? I bought a pretty dress the last time Sophie and I were out shopping, and I really wanted to wear it, but what if they think I'm dressing that way for attention? What if they think I'm the sort of person who does things simply for the shock value? They might think that's the reason I want to grow our baby, too. What if they think that, and it makes them decide I'm unsuitable?

Davian: Is this about the press coverage from the Internet Awards?

Félix: Yes, a little bit.

Davian: I guess it’d be pointless to tell you to ignore it?

Félix: People have said rude things about me before and I have learned to ignore them for the most part, but for some reason, I couldn’t stop thinking about it this time. It really hurt, and I wasn’t expecting it to.

Davian: I’m sorry. I should’ve figured something like that was going to happen.

Félix: How could you know?

Davian: The press can be brutal, and they love to shine the spotlight on anyone or anything different. Those reporters don’t know a thing about you, though. They just noticed something out of the ordinary and went for it. If anybody was going for shock value, it’s them.

Félix: Honestly, I wasn't trying to shock anyone. I chose that gown because I liked it. I felt comfortable and beautiful in it, and I knew you'd like seeing me in it. I wanted to be pretty. I didn't... I didn't want to make us look bad. I—

Davian: Shh... don't cry. You didn't make us look bad.

Félix: Are you certain?

Davian: You really didn't make us look bad, mon amoureux. I promise. You didn't see the comments on my Simstagram, and the messages people are posting on the show’s website. There’s so much love and support for you on there. I think you actually inspired a lot of people.

Félix: Really?

Davian: Yeah. I'll show it to you later, and you can see for yourself.

Félix: Okay.

Davian: Know what I think?

Félix: What?

Davian: I think, if you bought a dress that you really want to wear to our appointment, you should wear it. Those people should get to see the real you. And if they think that makes you unsuitable, then they're obviously judging on the wrong criteria.

Félix: I'm sorry. I know I'm being ridiculous, worrying about this.

Davian: You're allowed to worry about it. You don't need to apologize.

Félix: You know I'm usually a lot more stable than this.

Davian: You're fine. You're allowed to crack now and then. I mean, all this is kind of stressful, isn't it? But, we'll be okay.

Félix: I trust you.

Davian: I'm glad to hear it. Now, why don't I run downstairs and grab my laptop, and we can look at all the nice things my followers said about you? And maybe after, you can show me the dress you bought.

Félix: I'd like that, but later, perhaps? I’ve got a headache. I think I should lie down.

Davian: Do you need me to bring you anything?

Félix: No, thank you.

Davian: Want me to lie down with you?

Félix: You don't have to. I know you've got other things to do.

Davian: I love you so much. You know that, right? I just want you to be happy.

Félix: I'm happy when you're with me. I want you to be with me forever.

Davian: You agreed to marry me, remember? We said that 'till death us do part' thing, so you're stuck with me for life, now.

Félix: I'm happy to be stuck with you.

Davian: Are you sure you don't need anything?

Félix: A glass of ice water? And can you come and check on me in an hour or so? I don't want to nap all afternoon.

Davian: Got it.

Félix: If I'm feeling better when I wake up, then we can look at your Simstagram and the website.

Davian: Sounds like a plan. Can I see your dress, too? Or do you want that to be a surprise?

Félix: No, you can see it. Sophie said it makes me look delicate.

Davian: I’m sure it does.

Félix: I love you.

Davian: I love you too, my beautiful man. You get some rest, okay? I'll be back to see how you're doing in an hour or so.

Félix: Okay.

Davian: Don’t fall asleep with your glasses on. And no books. If I come up here to check on you and I find out that you were reading instead of resting…

Félix: What would you do?

Davian: I guess I’d be forced to get into bed with you and cuddle you until you fell asleep for real.

Félix: Yes, that sounds like a terrible punishment. I suppose I’d better do as I’m told, so I can avoid that.

Davian: I think you’re probably going to bring a book to bed with you on purpose now.

Félix: No. I really am going to try to sleep.

Davian: I’ll help you pack this evening, all right? And I’ll go down and let the landlord know we’re going to be gone for a week.

Félix: I already told her, and she already knows Ollie’s going to be here while we’re away.

Davian: Yeah… I’m still not sure that’s a great idea. What if he brings his girlfriends over and they disturb the neighbours?

Félix: What? Do you think any of Ollie‘s girlfriends scream as loudly as I do?

Davian: *laughing* Watcher help me. I don’t care what anyone says. You are perfect.

[thenightgazer]

Spark of Stardust

Chapter 1 : An Interstellar Quest It's not a date. Vergil insists upon it, even when he doubts himself as he asks Lyra to accompany him to search for a perfect birthday gift for Kyrie. But just like the dying star that sparks its undying stardust; the "date" is just a start for him to get to know more about Lyra, as the librarian reveals her "little, deepest and darkest secrets"

Warning : implied psychological and drug abuse

Part 6 of Tales of Apotelesma

You can also read this fic on AO3

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3

~~~

It starts with a soft hand that brushes his face. The fuzzy sensation wakes him up. The lamp on the ceiling is the first thing he sees when he slowly opens his eyes wide awake. His eyes linger to his surroundings— and that shocks him because he’s no longer in his bedroom at Devil May Cry. He’s awakened in someone else’s bedroom. The wall is painted with warm colours and there is a large bookshelf besides the bed. When he turns his head to his left, he spots toys and trinkets which supposedly belong to a little girl, and there sits a young woman who smiles at him.

Where am I?

“How was your sleep?” she asks him. Her soft hand ruffles his hair gently. “You look so peaceful.”

He’s speechless. Not because he doesn’t want to answer, but his mouth won’t cooperate with his head. His survival instincts scream at him to get away from this situation, but all he could feel is numbness.

“I brought you dinner,” the beautiful woman continues. He observes her cautiously; she is approximately in her thirties, with long brunette hair and brown eyes. She looks like the kind of woman who looks absolutely harmless. The way her body moves is delicate. Her voice sounds appealing as she tells him the menu and hopes he will like it. She gives him the same warm impression as his own mother, but this woman seems shady. Her eyes remind him of someone... but he couldn’t remember the person. The same cold, void eyes...

“The nurse said you haven’t eaten since last night. You refused to take your medicines. Why? Don’t you want to get better?” Her voice turns colder. “When I heard that you refused to eat, I couldn’t concentrate on my work. I’m afraid you won’t get better. Now you will eat and take your medicine for me, okay?”

He can’t follow everything she has said just now. Who is this woman? What medicines? What nurse? But his head nods automatically as if his body is controlled by someone else, and that little gesture makes this woman’s warm smile appear on her pretty face again.

“Good. Let’s eat! After that, I’ll read you something exciting. How’s that sound?”

He nods obediently, opening his mouth to eat the porridge. He can’t feel the taste, nor can he sense the texture of the food. But the woman looks at him as if she would blast if he didn’t eat. The sound of friction between the spoon and the bowl drives him crazy. She’s making sure that he swallows the food as she cleans up his mouth. After the bowl is empty, she proceeds to pour something from a bottle—medicine— on a small spoon and look up at him, opening her mouth as a command for him to mimic her gesture. She seems delighted when he swallows the medicine.

“Atta girl.”

What is this nonsense? What is that thing she put inside me?

But he knows he won’t get the answer.

It’s all just a dream, right?

The woman walks to the bookshelf. Her fingers run through the book until she finds the one she desires. She sits back besides him again and opens the book, her fingers scan through the pages.

“You don’t like Cinderella, so I picked up this one,” she shows him the cover of the book. “I guarantee you’ll like it! It’s called The Hobbit, an adventure story. Your favourite, right?”  

I do like adventure stories. But it isn’t my favourite. It’s Dante’s…

She starts her storytelling in a clear voice. “In a hole in the ground, there lived a hobbit...”

There’s something in her face when she reads. She seems more relaxed and softer than before, as if she got lost in the story. His suspicion is surprisingly gone while he listens to her and the familiarity strikes him again. She reminds him of his own mother when he was a child, reading him bedtime stories. Cambions in their early childhood needed a lot of sleep just like human children, but Dante and he always refused to sleep early and asked for more stories. There’s something peaceful about this familiarity. It calms him, then he decides to close his eyes again whilst the woman’s voice slowly fades away.

---

The dream shatters as Vergil’s cell phone rings loudly.

The hybrid lays still on his bed. He was sleeping for two hours just because he had no other options left to do aside from sleeping. Yet, even though his body doesn’t particularly need to sleep, he hates it when his slumber is interrupted. His hand reaches to find his phone and immediately pick it when he finds it on the desk beside his bed without seeing who’s calling him because he doesn’t bother to open his sleepy eyes.

“Dad?”

That familiar voice forces Vergil to open his eyes.

“Nero?”

“Yeah. You busy?”

“No,” Vergil throws a blanket from his naked chest as he moves his body to sit and brushes his hair. “What’s wrong, Nero?”

Nero doesn’t reply immediately. Vergil can hear a heavy sigh from his son and that makes him a bit anxious.  

“Nothing wrong. Just...” The young devil hunter lets out another sigh. “Today is Kyrie’s birthday. She invites you and the crews for dinner at six. Uh… six as in Fortuna time, which is an hour later from Red Grave time. Just in case you got lost in time again.”

“Of course. We will be attending the dinner. Thank you for the invitation.”

“It’s Kyrie who invites you, not me.”

“...”

“... but having you around here is not so bad. The kids were always whining whenever you and Dante left the house.” Nero’s response is almost excited and eager, much to Vergil’s relief.

The picture of Julio, Carlo and Kyle somehow makes Vergil grins. “You did very well taking care of those little rascals.”

“Thanks,” there’s a pause before Nero continues. “Anyway, I should get going. Nico needs my help to do some crazy shit.”

“I hope all is well for you.”

“You too, I guess...” the young man clears his throat. “And... thank you. For accepting the invitation.”

“It’s the least I could do,” The blue devil smiles, his anxiety is gone as their interaction goes smoothly. “Carry on, son.”

“Y-yeah— bye, then.”

Warmth fills Vergil’s heart as he cleans up his bed and folds the blanket neatly. Never in his life would he have thought that he’d become a father. Even though it was unplanned, having a son does change his life. He has no parental figures to ask advice from and those parenting books are not helping at all, but he learns at his own pace. Two years of effort of atonement is nothing compared to his sins, yet he wants the very best for Nero and is very protective to him.

Then the word stings him.

Birthday, huh?  

Ever since he was a little boy, Vergil has never understood the concept of celebrating birthdays. For him, birthday is just another day to pass. If anything, it seems like people love to celebrate the day when their life spans decrease. People are getting old, so what? Why do we celebrate that irony? Is that because of the presents and cake? Little Vergil never found the answer, but he did feel happy whenever he received presents and ate his birthday cake, even if that means he had to share it with his twin, Dante (he had given up the dream of having his own cake, since being twins means sharing almost everything). He didn’t even think about birthdays until Nero reminded him.

I wonder if he knows his birthday...

Vergil walks to the bathroom and washes his face. He looks at the mirror and the man guy in the mirror stares back at him. His reflection somehow reminds him of the strange dream. What was that dream about? It seems visceral, like it was my own memory. His heartbeat gets faster when he has a dreadful negative thought that it could be Mundus’ mind manipulation. If that was Mundus, it’s too pointless. He’d use my own memories to torture me, not with some kind of irrelevant vision.

“Mornin’,” Dante shoves himself besides Vergil and yawns. “I’m hungry.”

“Pleased to meet you, Hungry.”

Dante bursts into laughter. “Since when are you into dad jokes?”

“I’ll take the shower first.” Ignoring Dante’s question, Vergil picks up a dry towel and gets inside the shower cubicle.

Dante takes off his shirt and stretches his muscles. He washes his face and begins to shave his beard. “You said you fought Angelo demons at last week’s gig, right? Heard from Lady the same Angelo demons got sighted at another city. We still don’t have any information on who created and summoned them.”

Vergil wipes the droplets of water from his face. “It seems like those Angelo demons were none like all the artificial demons we have ever seen before. Their form, their abilities, their durability. They looked rather... futuristic, I'd say. I got an impression that the new Angelo was created mostly by advanced science rather than magic.”

“Another thing happened these past weeks. There are three outbursts at restricted medical facilities in different cities.”

“What medical facility?”

“Trish said that the three of them were research laboratories owned by Ravenhill Corporation.”

“Isn’t that the same corporation that won a peace award or something like that?”

“Yeah. The Ravenhills are an influential aristocrat with power over the health and security industry. Most of the health facilities in this world are sponsored and if not, owned by Ravenhill Corporation. They have a branch company here in this city too.”

“And do you think those incidents have a connection with the appearance of Angelo demons?”      

“Just a gut feeling, but that’s worth investigating, better safe than sorry, aight?” Dante brushes his hair and flips it back like Vergil. “Hey, I look just like you with this hairstyle! Perhaps I should go with this style from now on.”

“If you’re done talking, get out of the bathroom.”

“This is MY bathroom!”

“And I’m the one who cleans up the mess you’ve created in this house, Dante.”

“Fine~!” Dante chuckles as he cleans up the remaining shaving foam from his jaw. “Have you bought something for Kyrie’s birthday? Got missed calls and a text about the dinner party from Nero.”

“Not yet.”

“I’ve been thinking of giving her a fancy revolver. Heard from Nero that she’s quite good at using guns.”

“... do you really think that women fancy weapons as a gift?”

“Trish and Lady do. But hey! You can go ask our clever librarian!” Dante's face lightens up in exhilaration.

Vergil turns off the shower and wraps a towel around his waist as he opens the cubicle. “What do you mean by ’our’?!”

“Yours, then. She’s a normal civilian woman. Perhaps she can recommend you a perfect gift for Kyrie.”

No, if only you know that she’s not normal! “... you’re probably right.”

A teasing whistle comes from Dante as he takes off his pants and walks inside the cubicle. “As Yoda said, Verge, ‘ do or do not. There is no try ’. Call her and ask her out for a date.”

“I’m not taking any advice from a man who has rotten luck with women. And who is Yoda?”

“Call it what you want it. If you’re not asking her out, I’ll go ask her by myself.”

“Not before I step over your dead body.”

“Ha! Someone’s jealous for realsies~”

Vergil walks away from the bathroom before his inner turmoil tempts him to try to kill Dante… again. His insolent brother might have been teasing him too much, but in a way he’s right. He needs to find someone trusted enough to help him buy the perfect gift for Kyrie.

But she’s on duty today is her work day. I won’t make it right on time to the party if I have to wait for her shift to end.

He’s still thinking about it when he enters his room on the second floor and grabs his phone. Lyra’s contact name is showing up, but he hesitates. It’s still 9 o’clock. The library must have just opened.

After having a quite long internal battle with himself, he decides to call her anyway.

It takes a little bit long for Lyra to finally pick up her phone. Vergil catches the sound of her voice and a man’s laugh who Vergil assumes is Nate. “Bugger off for a minute, will you? — Clayton here.”

“Lyra.”

“Oh, hello Vergil!”

“Am I interrupting?”

“Not at all! Is there anything I can help you with?”

“... yes.”

“Are you okay? You sound like you want to cry.”

“I am certainly not,” Vergil groans at Lyra’s giggle. “Yet, I do believe I need your help.”

“Name it!”

“... it’s about a birthday present.” Vergil clears his throat. “Do you remember Kyrie, my son’s fiancée? She will be celebrating her birthday this evening. She invited Dante and I to her house for dinner.”

“I see.”

“Kyrie has always been there for Nero,” he continues. “She helped guide him to become the person he is now. She took care of him while I wasn’t there for him. She’s an important person to my son. That’s why... at least I have to show her some respect.”

“By giving her a decent birthday present.”

“Yes.”

“I think she will appreciate everything you give to her.”

“She will, certainly. She’s too polite to reject a present, but I don’t want her to think that I’m a careless father-in-law by giving her a gratuitous gift.”

“You’re right. I’d be delighted to accompany you to buy the present, but…I’m on duty right now. I’m afraid I couldn't help you any further.”

“That I know. That’s why I call for your advice.”

“I suggest something small, but meaningful. You told me she love to sing, right? Maybe a vinyl of classical music would — what in the bloody—! Nate! Give me back my phone at once!”

Vergil hears them grumbling and arguing at something. He considers to just hang up the phone given to his hunch that Lyra and Nate are probably having a fight right now, but suddenly he hears Nate’s voice as the young librarian speaks to him.

“Mr. Vergil? It’s Nate!”

This scoundrel's audacity...! “I recognize your voice, Nathaniel. What are you doing with Lyra’s phone?”

“Err... sorry for the interruption, but Lyra forced me to tell you this myself, or else you won’t believe her! I told her that I don’t mind if she wants to go on a date with you! My father won’t be checking on the library today!” Nate lets out a dry chuckle to break the ice, but since Vergil says nothing, Nate continues to speak. “She insisted on at least working today, so I told her to finish the duty earlier so she could spend her time with you. That’s all! Oh yeah, a little advice here; Lyra has a terrible sense of direction, means that you should hold her close— ouch!”  

A sound of a book slapped on Nate’s head comes to Vergil’s ear. The next is Lyra’s nervous voice talking to him. “Vergil? You heard Nate. So... we meet at three. How’s that sound?”

“I’ll pick you up at the library.”

“Okay!”

“Then... I’ll see you around.”

“Cheerio!”

Vergil hangs up the phone, unexpectedly feeling the queasiness after he recalls the word ‘date’ as Dante and Nate said earlier. Foolish. We are not dating. We are just going to buy a birthday present. That’s all. Stop this unnecessary disquietude. It’s just Lyra—

“Tell me you’re not gonna go on a date with your boring clothes!”

Vergil hardly glances to his side and sees Patty’s figure standing by his door. The twenty years old girl is wearing an apron and holding a broom in her hand. “At least wear something stylish! You and Dante are all hopeless! No wonder the two of you haven’t gotten married yet!”

“I believe that’s none of your concern, Miss Lowell. And although I lack what humans would consider common sense, the last time I know about human norms and etiquette, that it is rude to trespass on someone's private space and eavesdrop on other people’s conversation.”

“I’m not eavesdropping! I just happened to pass this room while cleaning this house because lately you are not present in this house and Dante is being a lazy bastard as usual! Show some gratitude!”

“Thank you for your help. But as you can see now, I am here and that means I will do the household job while you can go disturb Dante’s peace now.”

“Hey! I heard that!” Dante shouts from the first floor.

“Anyways, let me help you to choose better clothes for you!” Patty insists. “I don’t know who this girl is because Dante won’t tell me, but she seems special to you. You need to dress at your best! Impressing a girl on their first date is a must!”

“I’ll forgive your impudent attitude this time if you kindly close the door, Miss Lowell. I need to put some clothes on.”

Realizing that Vergil wears nothing but a towel wrapped on his waist, Patty flusters as she looks away and grabs the door knob violently. “Fine!”

The blue devil chuckles softly when he hears Patty goes downstairs and screams at Dante for whatever antics that he does right now. He searches through his wardrobe, pondering if Patty was right. And maybe she is. He’s about to blend into society, that means he needs to look less suspicious. He should wear something casual and humane.

Humans and their fashion. Even demons are much simpler.

He picks some clothes with a hope that he won’t look too ridiculous.

---

“Do you think he’s the type of person who brings flowers for a date?” Nate throws paper planes at Lyra’s direction, which she blocks it all with a book.

“Why do you insist that this is a date? We are friends. Friends go hang out sometimes.” Lyra says.

“Dammit, Lyre! You are older than me but I can’t believe you’re so clueless about this. Even idiots could tell that he likes you!”

Lyra groans desperately. “That’s it. That’s the problem of modern society. People nowadays confuse politeness with flirting!”

“Sometimes both work simultaneously! And that’s the case of Mr. Vergil. Sure, he’s polite to everyone even though he always looks like he wanted to kill someone. But he’s different with you; he’s not just polite, but kind. That’s two different things!”

Lyra half-heartedly listens to Nate’s babble; despite she already knows what is inside Nate’s mind. She knows what he means about Vergil being kind only to her, and Nate’s mind interprets how soft Vergil is whenever he’s around her. The thought of those forms of romanticism confuses her. Being a telepath, she has seen and listened into people’s minds for almost her entire life. She’s no stranger to the concept of love according to universal belief, yet she still doubts its existence.

Sometimes, what people think about something isn’t always synchronized with how they feel about it.

And speaking of which, I haven’t heard Nate’s thoughts since fifteen seconds ago...

“He’s here!” Nate declares as he looks up at the window near the front door. “Wait, uh... is it really him?”

“What?”

“He looks... different.” Nate mumbles. “And he didn’t bring flowers. Guess he’s not the flower type of guy.”

“On the contrary, he is.” Lyra takes a brief look at her appearance in the mirror and puts on eyeglasses before giving a wink at Nate. “See you tomorrow!”

“Now who’s excited about the date!?”

She giggles throughout her journey to the front door, only to be surprised when she opens the door and finds Vergil standing in front of her and about to open the door too. But today he looks stunningly different; he is wearing as black shirt beneath a navy-blue casual coat. His dark trousers make him look taller than usual. He changes his footwear into a pair of black chukka boots. Even with his usual warrior clothes, Vergil Sparda is already breathtakingly handsome. His casual look just enhances his majestic stature.  

Lyra has never really given any attention to fashion, but now she can’t take her eyes off of him. “What’s with the sudden change in your sense of fashion?”  

“You don’t like it?”

“I like it!” she blurts. “You look… so… normal”

“Is it just me or does it sound like an insult?”

“It’s a compliment!”

“... thank you, I suppose,” Vergil reluctantly scratches his nape. “Shall we go now?”

“Let’s!”

Lyra glares at Nate who’s giving her double thumbs up and loudly wishing her good luck before she closes the door.

“So,” the librarian walks side by side with Vergil. “Do you remember I mentioned that I purchased my devil arm at an antique shop?”

“Yes. What’s with that?”

“I think it’s a good place to start our quest. The shop sells antique weapons, jewelries, old books and trinkets. Perfect collection for Kyrie.”

“Very well. Where’s this shop located?”

“Nova Town.”

“It’s too far from here.”

“Lucky for us, you have Yamato.”

“I’m beginning to think that you see me as a mere means tool of transportation.”

“Maybe,” she winks playfully. “But you are too decent to be a mere tool, my dearest friend.”

The hybrid rolls his eyes, “Let’s find an empty alley first.”

---

“That was the first time I saw Lyra smiling like that,” Nate mutters at himself as he taps something on his cell phone. “Good for her! Ever since I saw their chemistry on the murder in the library weeks ago, I know they’re going to form a relationship soon!”

The twenty four years old librarian giggles at his own fantasy while drowning himself further into a mobile game he always plays whenever he has free time. He almost startled himself when the bell rings and a customer comes in. Nate abruptly pauses the game and greets the guest. “Welcome to The Literarium!”

The guest — a tall and ginger-haired man — returns Nate’s greeting with a nod. A suspicion arises in Nate’s head as he observes the man’s eyes that are covered with sunglasses. Why the hell does he wear sunglasses indoors? He continues to follow the man’s movement, which is also suspicious. The man seems detached from reality as he stares at one of the shelves quite long without really doing anything, not even touching the books. He walks slowly to another section, again without any interest in the books. The man seems eager to look for something as he repeatedly tilts his head to look outside the window, but Nate is certain that he’s not here for books. Then why bother coming here if he’s not interested in books? Nate clicks his pen anxiously. Paranoia begins to consume him. What if he wants to rob this place?!

The ginger-haired man approaches the sale section and finally picks a book. He looks at the cover briefly before heading to the counter. Nate fakes a polite smile when he scans the book— Lord of the Flies by William Golding— and forces himself to make a small talk. “Fine day, isn’t it?”

The man nods while giving Nate his money. “I agree.”

“You like allegorical one, huh?”

The man furrows his brow. “Sorry?”

Nate lifts the copy of Lord of the Flies . “You don’t know that Golding wrote one of the best allegorical novels all the time?”

“I’m sorry, I don’t know. I only recognized it as one of the bestseller books,” the man chuckles. His laughter surprisingly sounds very friendly. “I picked it because the synopsis reminds me of the past.”

“Jesus, what a chaotic past you must have back then.” Nate gives him the book and his change.

“Quiet so,” the man flips the page, but Nate can sense he’s focusing on another thing. “By the way, the woman who wears eyeglasses… She came out from this place with a man about five minutes ago. Does she work here?”

Shit, another Lyra’s admirer. That explains my suspicion! “Yeah. You know her?”

“She looks like a person I used to know. Quite different, but I spot some similarities.”

“Maybe they are the same person?”

“The same person?” the man chuckles again as he closes the book. “That’s impossible.”

“Why?”

“She died years ago.”

“Oh, man… I’m so sorry...”

“It’s fine. She wasn’t related to me, just a person I knew. At first glance, your friend looks eerily similar to her,” the man’s face abruptly turns into doubt and anxious. Nate swears he can see his hands tremble. “I was terribly surprised when I saw your friend out there. I thought the woman I knew was alive again. What is the name? Your lady friend, I mean.”

“Louisa.” Nate lightly says his lie as soon as he’s aware of the man’s intention. I’m not doing anything wrong. Lyra told me to fake a name in case some flirty bastards ask me her name.

“Louisa, then. Pretty name,” the man seems pleased at Nate’s answer. “Thank you. Lovely library, anyway. Good day for you.”

“Thank you. Happy reading and have a good day!”

He’s different from any of Lyra’s secret admirers, Nate feels uneasy about the man’s strange attitude even though the man has already taken his leave. He makes a mental note to contact Lyra soon after he closes the library. “That guy looks like he’s about to plan something fishy. But I can’t disturb Lyra and Mr. Vergil right now.”

Nate grabs his cell phone and restarts the game with a hope that nothing bad would happen.

---

She’s strangely quiet today.

Ever since they arrived at Nova Town, Vergil catches something unusual from Lyra. She guides the way to the antique shop without talking to him but carefully watches her surroundings. But at the same time, she seems to lose her focus and sometimes stares blankly at something. They have been walking for almost 30 minutes and they haven’t arrived at the antique shop yet. Also, that’s not the only thing from her that is unusual... “You wear eyeglasses.”

“Huh?” Lyra automatically touches her eyeglasses. “Why? You don’t like a girl with eyeglasses?”

“I don’t dislike it.”

“You have a funny way to compliment others, don’t you?”

“I have never seen you wearing eyeglasses before. I thought I was looking at a completely different person when you opened the door earlier.”

“I always wear eyeglasses whenever I’m out to shop, just for aesthetic purposes. I’ll take it off if that makes you uncomfortable—”

“Please don’t. You look lovely with that.”

“Thanks!”

“You’re welcome. Are we getting closer to the shop?”

“… I think so?”

Vergil stops abruptly, “Tell me we are not lost.”

“W-we’re not!” she stutters in panic. “I’m just having a little confusion here, because this town looks different from the last time I came here. It has only been two years and the town is already changing...”

“Are you even certain that we are in the right town?”

“One hundred percent certain!”

“Then tell me,” Vergil curves a devilish grin. “Is Nathaniel right? That you have a terrible sense of direction?”

A light blush blooms on Lyra’s face. “Uh... yeah— but we are in the right town! For real! Just because I have a terrible sense of direction, doesn’t mean I’m an idiot!”

“Yet we are lost, aren’t we?”

“We are not! See that monument over there? It’s the town’s icon. We just have to turn left to that road and the antique shop should be on the right corner.”

Vergil watches the monument that Lyra mentioned before he glances at her again with doubtful looks. “Alright, then. But why don’t you use… what is it again... GPS?”

“Later. I’m practicing my sense of direction by practicing my telepathic ability.”

“Does your telepathic ability have something to do with your sense of direction?”

“Since the murder in the library, I’m practicing to read people’s mind whenever you’re around me because your magical defense blocks my telepathic ability. Normally, all I need to do is just focus on their minds and find out if some of them have knowledge of the place I’m about to go.”

“Why bother? You still can read minds by touching their body parts.”

“That’s impractical! Not everyone wants to be touched. Just imagine if I need to touch a person with haphephobia.”

“I thought you like it when you don’t have to read minds anymore.”

“Just in case of an emergency. Who knows if we would find any strange cases again, or if I’m stuck with Dante and there’s an urgent situation where I’m required to smuggle into someone’s head.”

“Hold on. Your telepathy doesn’t work on Dante too?”

“I guess the power of Sparda includes protection from telepaths.”

“I see. Now I understand,” Vergil scoffs. “The reason why you were awfully quiet since we stepped in this town is that you tried to practice your telepathic ability to find out the antique shop’s direction, so you won’t embarrass yourself in front of me because you have poor sense of direction and you think having to use GPS would make you look unreliable as a guide.”

Lyra hides her hands behind her back and stares at the ground, which to Vergil indicates that everything he said is true and that she’s embarrassed to admit it. To be very honest, he doesn’t think that Lyra does something wrong. He just wants to clarify things behind her unusual behavior, but it unconsciously sounds like he’s scolding her for her little secret.

“Just use the GPS if you need it. You have nothing to be ashamed of. That won’t make me think less of you.”

Lyra seems to hesitate at first, but eventually shrugs and takes her phone out from her bag. Vergil quietly smirks at her surrender.

“Fortunately, we’re on the right track!” She shows Vergil the map. “Thank you for your encouragement, Vergil. That’s the longest advice you ever said to me.”

He shrugs it off. “I guess that’s what friends are for.”

“Still, that means a lot to me.”

“Just forget it. Then how’s your practice going?”

“Still doing my best. The first time I tried to read someone’s mind without touching them whenever you were around me, it was all nothing. But now I can see blurry images and hear buzzing sound!” She smiles at him, her eyes beam as she points at the rustic shop at the corner of the street. “Look! We've arrived!”

When Vergil enters the antique shop, he expects the shopkeeper to greet them with unstoppable pestering offers like all the shopkeepers normally do. That’s why he hates shopping. Thankfully the shopkeeper is sleeping on the counter, like she doesn’t care if someone steals one of the items. The shop itself is quiet and the goods are all unique. The problem is, Vergil doesn’t know where to start searching. There are many items that Vergil puts a certain degree of interest in—necklaces, bracelets, clocks, paintings—but he doesn’t think that it would be useful or meaningful to Kyrie. He starts to think about Dante’s suggestion to give her a weapon for self-protection. It seems easier than this endless searching.

“Do you know the biggest dilemma when it comes to shopping? You expect to find a certain thing, but when you’re in the shop, suddenly you’re not sure what to buy anymore.” Lyra chuckles at Vergil’s confused expression.

“Evidently,” Vergil picks an antique revolver. “I think I want to give her a weapon.”

“Is Kyrie an excellent combatant?”

“She can take care of herself, though she still needs a lot of practice, but she won’t survive a second if she had to fight multiple opponents.”

“Mmmm... okay but... how about something for protection from the demons?”

“That will do. It’s way more practical and useful.”

“Alright. Let’s ask the shopkeeper.”

Vergil points his chin at the counter. “She’s sleeping.”

“I’ll wake her up.” Lyra fixates her focus on the shopkeeper until she slowly raises her head from the counter table and rubs her eyes.

Vergil almost couldn’t hide his amusement. She can wake someone up from slumber? How advanced is her ability actually?

The shopkeeper yawns loudly. “Welcome. How can I help y’all?”

“We’re looking for an item for protection from demons. Do you have anything suitable for that?” Lyra asks.

The shopkeeper looks straight to Lyra’s eyes, then to Vergil’s. She sighs as she walks to the weapon cabinet. “I don’t have much of that, but I have this one. Take a look.” she mumbles, handing Lyra a red music box. The music box looks captivating with a rose pattern carved on the box. When Lyra opens the music box, Vergil recognizes the box is playing Bach’s The Well-Tempered Clavier.

“Lovely, but I don’t see what’s so special about the music box,” Vergil mutters his doubt.  

“Easy, dude. Push the button near the mirror to open the secret room behind it.”

Lyra does the exact instruction until the secret room is opened and reveals a golden bracelet inside.

“What’s that for?” Lyra asks.

“It will glow red whenever there's demons nearby,” the shopkeeper lights her cigarette and walks back to the counter. “When the bracelet glows, you press it and close your eyes, because it will cast a very blinding light. It’ll blind and burn demons and that’s the best time for you to run away.”

Lyra glances at Vergil, who’s examining the music box and the bracelet. She holds her giggle when she notices that the bracelet glows in red when Vergil holds it and abruptly puts it back to the secret room behind the mirror before the shopkeeper notices it.

“I guess the bracelet couldn’t distinguish demons and cambions,” she whispers to him.

“This should be fine,” Vergil forms a satisfied grin. “It has both protection advantage and aesthetical function. Perfect.”

“You take that?!” the shopkeeper shouts eagerly.

“Yes,” Vergil replies. “Is there a money-back guarantee in case the item doesn’t properly work?”

“This is an antique shop, dude. Some items might not working at all—”

“I believe I don’t have to repeat myself.” Vergil insists.

The shopkeeper gulps at Vergil’s unspeakable death threat within his icy eyes, knowing that there’s no use to argue with a man like Vergil. “Dammit, fine! Now can I get my money?”

Lyra howls with laughter, “Blimey, you are a terrifying customer.”

Vergil grins in pride as he heads to the counter.

---

The birthday party will begin in an hour, but Vergil chooses to spend the rest of the time with Lyra at the Sparda Manor. During the day time, they only meet in the library. That makes their little adventure today seem rare... and fun. Lyra buys them ice creams at the end of their journey in Nova Town. She can’t hold her laughter when she catches Vergil’s eyes sparking in childish interest as he holds his ice cream once the magic portal opens its way to the Manor.

“The shopkeeper was different from the one whom I met two years ago. He was nice and helpful,” Lyra murmurs, licking her bubblegum ice cream. “Guess he didn’t work there anymore. We get a sleepyhead instead.”

Vergil says nothing as he examines his blueberry ice cream cone. His memory of V eating cheeseburger hits him. “Why do humans think that creating something messy is a good idea?”

“It’s called innovation, Vergil.”

“Messy innovation.”

“As long as people like it, it is considered as a great innovation.”

He finally gives up and chomps his ice cream. “This is not bad.”

“Tell me this is not your first time eating ice cream.”

“I might be inexperienced in human lifestyle, but that doesn’t mean I never tasted ice cream.”

It’s strange, Vergil recalls the moment when they used to be strangers before Almagest helped them to get closer. Now they stand side by side and talk about stuff like old friends to the point where he could never get enough of her companionship. He lets her wander around his childhood house, even if he barely calls it a house now. He lets out a silent chuckle when she lifts a pile of rocks up to the air just to see what hides behind it, only to find another ruins and she’s slightly disappointed.

“For a second I thought your father was Johann Sebastian Bach.” Lyra looks up at Sparda’s family painting.

“You are not the first person who said that.”

She laughs. “Oh look at you… stoic since you were born. And I already got a picture on Dante being impatient while the painter kept asking him to stand still.”

“Pretty much correct. He complained how itchy his feet were at the end of the session.”

“Your mother was gorgeous,” Lyra admires Eva’s angelic stature. “No wonder Sparda fell for her.”

Vergil forms a wistful smile. “She was.”

“This painting reminds me of The Picture of Dorian Gray .”

“Pray tell, why?”

“Dorian sold his soul to the devil for eternal youth, and it decayed his self-portrait painting every time he did a sin. Of course your family portrait is a different case, but you see, your mother’s face is the only one that didn’t get burned by fire. It’s like a sign that she was the only human in the family…”

“And the rest of the family members were cursed by the evil blood that ran in their veins. That’s why the faces of the three of us were burned. That’s a picturesque perspective.”

“I didn’t say that demon is always evil—”

“I know. Still, it’s a good metaphor. Haven’t thought of it myself.”

“Why don’t you take the painting with you? People keep their family portrait in their house.”

“Dante and I agreed to leave it here as a sign that this mansion once belonged to our family. Besides, I can’t imagine such a painting to be hanged on the shop’s soiled wall. It would be a disgrace for the painting itself.”

“Now that you mentioned it, I think you are right.”

Lyra continues to lift some rocks and put it back carefully once she finds nothing interesting.. “Have you been in there again after you escaped the Underworld with Dante?”

“To collect mementos, yes. Though, as you can see, nothing much was left since Urizen destroyed the whole city. Not to mention almost all parts of the house were destroyed or blocked by pillars and huge stones. We tried to remove them, but it’d cause a domino effect throughout the manor and demolish it completely.” 

“How did it feel to visit your childhood home again?”

Vergil swallows his ice cream at once. He puts a handkerchief out from his coat and wipes his lips. “It felt mostly heartbreaking.”

“I see,” Lyra nods and gives Vergil a light pat on his shoulder. “Not everyone could even come back to the place where their trauma began. Not that it’s necessary. I just found it encouraging.”

“Speaking of memento, what was the most valuable present you had ever received?” Vergil curiously asks.

“Oh, we start to have a small talk now?”

“I thought we agreed to trust each other, don’t we? Then we should start from mundane things.”

“Alright. Make sense. Let me recall it… mmmm… oh right! A lyre!”

“You play lyre? Amazing.”

“I thought you were about to say ironic.”

“Beg your pardon?”

“You know, a lyre plays a lyre.”

Vergil smirks, recalling her remark on their previous little adventure, “You’re right. It’s ironically amazing.”

The librarian rolls her eyes as she bites the ice cream cone. “My mum bought me one for my fifth birthday. It only lasted for two months before I asked her to give me a harp for the next birthday.”

“Did she finally buy you a harp?”

“She didn’t.”

“Why?”

“She died before my next birthday.”

Vergil immediately stared at Lyra’s sullen eyes. “I’m terribly sorry to hear that.”

“It’s okay,” she smiles at him, chewing the last part of her cone. “It was a long time ago.”

Lyra has so many things she hides behind her amicable demeanor, and Vergil should’ve feel relieved because after all these months, Lyra finally opens up a little bit about her family, yet he doesn’t feel it at all.

“Were you close with your mother?” Vergil’s tone is full of consideration.

Lyra taps her fingers on her chin. “I guess so. We only had each other.”

“… How did she… die?”

The librarian smirks at him. “If I told you she fell from the tree, would you believe me?”

“Only if that’s the truth.”

She goes silent for a while, seeming unwilling to continue her story. She opens an empty drawer, looking at nothingness for a while. “You might’ve heard about her.”

“Your mother?”

“Uh-uh,” Lyra nods calmly, but Vergil senses a slight hesitation. “Her name was Asteria Crescent.”

Impossible! “The award-winning astronomer?”

“Astrobiologist, yes.”

“I see. That explains your fondness of astronomy.”

The first time Vergil heard about Asteria Crescent was when he was eleven years old, still homeless and constantly moved out from place to place in search of power. Asteria’s groundbreaking research of modern astrobiology broke the news. Her discovery led the scientists to rethink human’s position in this world and question the exact location of the Underworld in the known universe, considering demons as an extraterrestrial creature with its own origin and evolution. Demons and magic are inseparable, but Asteria Crescent was brave to make a further step to explain demonology in a scientific approach. Science and magic are two sides of a coin , Vergil recalls her statements. Science just has yet to understand magic.

“Asteria was a Titan goddess of falling stars and nighttime divinations. That suited her very well,” Lyra chuckles bitterly, swinging her hand to lift a pile of ruins back to its place. “I once wondered why she didn’t name me Hecate, daughter of Asteria and goddess of witchcraft. Maybe at that time, she didn’t have a thought that someday I’ll develop this… psychic ability.”

“The media never reported anything regarding her cause of death. It happened all so sudden, they said.”

“They always spoke highly of her. But when she died, they turned the story into rumors and gossip.”

“So did she fall from the tree?”

“She did fall.”

“But not from the tree.”

Vergil’s demonic eyes catch Lyra’s body slightly flinching, but she maintains her calmness and fakes a smile. “Let’s talk about something else.”

“I'm sorry. I shouldn’t have asked you further about your private life.”

“You entrusted me your biggest secret. I intend to do so. I’m just… not ready to open up, but I know that I want to.”

“When I said that we should try to trust each other, I didn't mean that you should abruptly open yourself to me.”

“Too late. Now you know I’m the daughter of a dead astrobiologist.”

“Why did you change your surname then?”

Lyra stops and gazes at Vergil. She seems anxious while glancing at her surroundings carefully, as if she’s afraid that someone else would hear them. Vergil slightly bows his body when Lyra whispers in his ear.

“I’m being hunted.”

The furrow on Vergil’s brow is going deeper. “By whom?”

“Someone who wants to abuse my power. That’s why I need to change my surname and hang out around wearing eyeglasses, so people won’t find out about my identity.”

For a moment, they stand still there, staring at each other’s eyes to find some clues. It’s logical that Lyra’s unique ability would attract power-seekers, be it humans or demons. Vergil knows it too well; the danger of possessing a greater power. A part of him wants to believe her words…

If only he failed to spot a subtle grin on the corner of her lips.

I would be absolutely fooled by her deception, Vergil grunts discontentedly. "You are lying, aren’t you?”

Lyra’s laughter echoes throughout the lake.

Vergil snarls at her unstoppable giggle. "Quite a jester, I see.”

“I take that as a compliment.”

Vergil doesn’t bother to reply, because he knows it would lead to another bickering. He doesn’t try to hide his amused smile too, even though Lyra teases him about the ‘sly devil smile’. To be honest, he couldn’t care less. He just wants to see her smile, her true smile.

Like the way she’s smiling right now.

“Do you want to have a look at the lake?” Vergil offers, trying to lift the mood. “There’s nothing left to see here.”

“Sure!”

They sit on the cobblestone pier in the lake while admiring the twilight sky. It’s Vergil’s favorite place, ever since he was a child. This place has changed; there are no more Qliphoth roots left and there are several trees and wildflowers growing on the land. The lake no longer contains human blood. It’s mesmerizing how fast time flies and changes the entire city.

“I used to spend my days here, reading and playing with Dante,” Vergil says. “We loved being here more than staying indoors.”

“I can see the reason. It’s bloody beautiful here.” Lyra mutters her admiration. She taps her fingers on the cobblestone playfully, causing a small rift in the lake.

“Dante once pushed me to the lake because we fought over a chocolate bar,” Vergil recalls one of his precious memories. “I pretended to be drowned. He pulled me out of the water and cried, pleaded to me for not leaving him alone and that he’s sorry. Promised me that he won’t disturb me again. Right when he shook my body to wake me up, I pushed him to the lake but he managed to drag me with him.”

Lyra can’t hold her howls of laughter. She chortles until her stomach hurts and her throat gets sore. Vergil swears he never saw her laughing like this. “I’m sorry— I— HAHAHAHAHA!”

“Lower your voice,” Vergil grunts. He starts to regret his decision for rambling about his childhood antics just to get rid of Lyra’s gloomy face. “You might end up choking yourself to death.”

“ Pfffftttt!”

“Will you shut up?!”

“Sorry!” Lyra bites her thumb to hold her cackle but fails. “I just… bwahahaha! It seems that ‘never hold a grudge to the people who wronged you’ is true!”

Vergil pulls her thumb away from her teeth, caressing her reddened thumb. “A little deeper, you would bleed your thumb.”

The careful touch from Vergil distracts Lyra for a while. It’s the first time he holds her without gloves on, and it surprises her how soft his palm is despite the fact that he is a warrior who wields various weapons. Her thumb slips lightly from his palm. “Even if I bleed, I got your Lucy Pevensie’s cordial to heal me.”

Vergil sighs heavily as he removes some strands of Lyra’s hair from her forehead. “I gave it to you for an emergency case only. The cordial was made mostly from demon’s blood, mixed with rare herbs and some complicated spells to make it suitable for human’s bodies. Even the bottle was made from demon’s materials to prevent physical damage. Trish produced only a few bottles of cordial, so use it wisely.”

“I will,” Lyra picks out the cordial bottle from her bag and shows it to Vergil. “See? I haven’t used it since Capulet.”

“Put it back into your bag before it slipped from your hand and fell into the lake.”

“Alright alright! Why do you sound a lot like my mother?” Lyra puts the bottle back into her bag.

“You are clumsy and easily distracted. I have to keep my eyes on you every time. It’s rather distressing.”

“I can take care of myself!” Lyra lays a punch on Vergil’s chest. “Remember, I weakened Phantom last week, so you devil twins could kill that spider easily!”

The cambion smirks disdainfully to her weak strike. He puts something off from the back of his coat and hands it to Lyra. It’s an old book with a black leatherbound with the title engraved in a beautiful golden emboss. “Your payment for escorting me today.”

Lyra observes the front cover with beaming eyes. “The Poems of Edgar Allan Poe...”

“It’s one of the mementos I brought from the Manor. I reckon you would love Poe, given to your fondness of horror and mystery.”

“Then I have to refuse! It’s yours!”

“I believe I made myself clear when I said the book is for you.”

Lyra was about to refuse again, but quickly zip her mouth when Vergil glared at her with his terrifying and undeniable gaze. He won’t take any ‘no’ from her. She flips the pages, and something almost falls from the book before Lyra catches it quickly; an antique necklace with an obsidian pendant. She takes a closer look at the pendant and recognizes the familiar white, shiny dots pattern on it— the Lyra constellation.  

“… did you pick this one too from the manor?” Lyra asks carefully.

“… it was from the antique shop.”

“I didn’t see you strolling around the jewelry section.”

“It was displayed on the counter. Nothing special. Just normal jewelry. The pattern just reminded me of you��”

Vergil can’t finish his sentence because Lyra wraps her arms between his waist, locking him in a tight embrace. He can feel the strange, but comfortable warmth fills his body as he returns to hug her without hesitation. Her body is so small and shorter compared to his height that he needs to bow slightly in order to balance the embrace. He loves her scent— a strange mixture of peach, black tea and old roses— and quietly inhales the intoxicating fragrance from her hair. He feels like he could do this all day.

“Thank you,” Lyra’s murmur vibrates his chest. “I’ll cherish this forever.”

“It's just a book and a necklace.”

“These are the best presents since the lyre from my mum!” she chuckles. “I’m sorry. I don’t usually hug people around.”

“Neither do I.”

“So let us hug a bit longer, shall we?”

“It looks like I have no choices but to comply.”

For a moment, they banish their distrusts about each other, breaking the adamant barrier and wishing the time to stop ticking.  

---

Yesterday, Lyra dreamt of a boy who wanders around a big house.

She thought it was just a meaningless dream, at least until she realized that she was the boy himself. She looked at her—  his — reflection in the mirror; the little boy was handsome with swept back silver hair and a black pajama. His serious and grumpy expression reminded of someone she couldn’t remember yet. She— the boy —wandered off around a big and dark house. It wasn’t her own intention; like her movement was controlled by someone else. She opened a chamber and let herself in. There was a woman who lay unconscious on the bed. Lyra could see traces of tears on the woman’s sullen face. Her body forced her to lift the quilt to cover the woman’s body and tip-toed herself out from the room.

When she was about to go back to her room, she heard a wheezing cry and followed the voice to the main hall. It didn’t take her too long to find out the source of the voice as her hand reached to open a white drawer, where another little boy with the same silver hair cried inside it.

“Vergil…” that little boy stared at her with a turbulent sob coming out from his mouth. “Father… you… you d-d-don’t believe that he died… r-right?”

I am…Vergil?

Does that mean that this crying boy… Dante?

The next thing Lyra remembered was she woke up with tears stream down her face like a waterfall, soaking her pillow. She was sure the sadness she felt in the entire dream wasn’t hers, but Vergil and Dante’s. She was going to tell Vergil about her strange dream when she saw the exact same white drawer in her dream at Sparda Manor, but she thought she was biased. Vergil had told her about how devastated his family was when they heard that Sparda was deceased, and her dream must be just her brain playing a trick to her.

But then she thought, Vergil never told me that he found Dante hiding and crying in that draw…

Tonight, Lyra falls into another strange dream. Even weirder and scarier. A titanic, god-like demon tortured her in the most unimaginably painful way. Her entire body was chained and spiked. The demon was merciless. His face was full of disgust and hatred as he spat her insults and penetrated her head with dreadful illusions she couldn’t even envision. He kept calling her “disgraceful offspring of the traitor Sparda”. It was only then she realized that she wasn’t herself, but Vergil.

Lyra fights herself to wake up, and is barely successful. The dream is too visceral that she almost still can feel the pain all over the body as she opens her eyes. Her back is wet from her own sweat.

Why do I keep dreaming of him? Moreover, I never experienced this kind of pain…

Does it have something to do with our accidental mind link on that day? Strange things have happened since then...

Her wave of thoughts are interrupted by the sudden thirst in her throat. She snaps her fingers and the light from the lamp brightens the bedroom. The door cracks slowly to open its way for Lyra. The librarian walks with leaden steps as she rubs her sleepy eyes. She almost stumbled upon a chair when she entered the kitchen.

“A cuppa sounds delightful to cure nightmares,” Lyra mumbles at herself, swinging her hand to summon a cup from the drawer. The cup flies and lands right in front of her, but she makes no further movement but staring blankly at the cup. Her body is still shivering by the imaginary pain from her nightmare.

“From all the people in the world, why does it have to be Vergil? This mind link is vexing me...”

The harsh cry of a raven causes Lyra to glance over the kitchen’s window. She curves a light smile while opening the window and lets a little raven enter her house. The raven lands on her shoulder for a while before flying around the house and lands on the kitchen counter.

“Where have you been, Corvus? Haven’t seen you for days!” Lyra greets the raven.

The little bird tilts its head and squawks. Lyra giggles as she pats the raven’s head. “Hey look. My friend gave his poem book to me and one of the titles is The Raven. I like it, by the way. And I’ve been thinking about him lately, even dreaming about him. To be honest, it’s disturbing. Do you think I should invite him here and tell him the truth?”

The raven gives her a nod.

“You are right. A cuppa is best served with a friend, don’t you think?”

Corvus flaps its wings eagerly. The black bird flies around Lyra’s head before making its way outside the house.

“Leaving already? You haven’t eaten yet!” Lyra shouts at the raven. “Alright then, send my regard to your girlfriend!”

Corvus squawks something like a curse, causing Lyra to barks in laughter. She heads back to the counter as she turns on the radio to entertain her confusing state of mind, picking the channel telepathically until she finds her favourite channel. She listens to the song while summoning her phone from the bedroom, tapping the screen until Vergil’s contact name pops on the screen.

Down in the willow garden

Where me and my love did meet

As we sat a-courtin'

My love fell off to sleep

I had a bottle of burgundy wine

My love, she did not know

So I poisoned that dear little girl

On the banks below

I drew a saber through her

It was a bloody knife

I threw her in the river

Which was a dreadful sign

“By Jove, that song is sinister,” Lyra chuckles darkly. Her solemn face is turning pale. “As for the poisoned little girl… well…”

She clicks Vergil’s name, waiting for the devil to answer with fingers tangled between the black pendant on her neck, hoping half-heartedly that he wouldn’t pick her call.

~~~

A/N : the song mentioned at the end of the chapter is “Down In The Willow Garden” by The Everly Brothers.

Tagging : @drusoona @harlot-of-oblivion @queenmuzz @shiranyaaww @andieperrie18 @rubixa-seraph @blooddrop-palace (I honestly forgot who to tag, so if you want to be tagged just send you reply or DM me! XD)

Masterlist | AO3

[ingu]

These TUA prompt drabbles you're doing are amazing. If you're up for more, how about “Is there anything you won’t do to get what you want?” and “Why didn’t you call me sooner?”

[Warning for period-typical racism affecting Allison in this fill.]

The expression on Allison’s face when she walked into the hospital room was almost enough to make Five instantly regret the phone call.

He knew he didn’t make a pretty sight, laid up in bed dressed in a hospital gown, an IV plugged into his arm. The doctors and the police officer had had far too many questions about where his injuries had come from. And the easiest way to get out of answering had been for him to play the scared kid and demand for them to call his family.

Though now that his family was here, Five found he didn’t enjoy the look of shock and worry that crossed his sister’s face in the slightest.

“Five!” Allison gasped, eyes wide as she rushed to his bedside. “Are you okay?” 

“I’m fine,” Five said, pushing himself up, wincing as the movement tugged at his injuries. “I need you to get me out of here.”

“What happened to you?” Allison insisted. “Why didn’t you call me sooner? How long have you been here?”

This was the other thing he had been dreading, the questions. Frustration flared.

“Allison, if it helps, I didn’t want to call you at all,” Five said, reaching out his hand. “Now give me your coat, and the scarf.” He had no idea where they’d put his clothes and he had to hide the gown somehow when they left.

If Five could reliably walk on his own he’d already be out of here, but even getting out of bed was a problem at the moment with the painkillers in his system. His powers were refusing to cooperate and he needed someone to get him out before the entire nightmare would drag on any longer.

“Oh for the love of-” Allison sighed, the worry on her face hardening into a glare. “Do you know how hard it was for me to get in here? Looking like this?” She gestured at her face aggressively.

Right, segregation. “Considering your powers I didn’t think it’d be a problem.”

“I’m trying to not rely on it anymore, Five. Anyway, what happened to you?” Allison insisted, making no move to acquiesce to Five’s demands. “Why are you in hospital? Answer the question.”

Five, arm still outstretched, was starting to see the lack of wisdom in antagonizing the one person he was relying on to rescue him.

Five sighed, closing his eyes briefly as he lowered his arm. “Fine, I passed out in the street, okay? Someone brought me to the hospital when they saw the blood and injuries… and then they wouldn’t let me leave.”

“What?” Shock shifted back into concern on Allison’s face, and she looked down at Five’s body, raising an arm as though she wanted to check him over. “You passed out? What injuries? Who hurt you?”

Five’s first instinct was to refuse to answer, but that was probably equally pointless since Allison could easily get it out of the doctor. Was Five ever going to live this down? Most likely not. 

“Just some bruising and scrapes, and the old shrapnel wound was bleeding again,” Five said. The doctors had also made some comment about malnourishment and exhaustion, but Allison didn’t need to know about that. Five was pretty sure he’d be fine.

“Shrapnel?” Confusion, then understanding, crossed Allison’s face in rapid succession. “Five, how long have you been in the 60s?”

Five raised an eyebrow. “Four? Five days?”

Allison’s eyes widened, and then she rubbed at her temples. “Oh my God. Why didn’t you tell us?”

“It’s not like I was hiding it,” Five said. “You guys never asked. Now give me your clothes. We need to get out of here before the nurse comes back.”

Five really didn’t want to find out if social services was already a thing in 1963, because he knew what all of it looked like right now. There were only so many conclusions a person could reach when they found what looked like an injured runaway passed out in the street.

Allison narrowed her eyes at him, before she sighed, clearly recognizing that Five was right, and started stripping off her coat and scarf. Five carefully removed his IV as she did, and then pulled the coat over his gown, before wrapping the scarf around his neck to hide the rest of it.

“Uh,” Allison looked over him. “Where are your shoes?”

Five shrugged, staring down at his toes. He’d sort of forgotten about shoes. He was going to blame it on the drugs.

“Okay, you look ridiculous,” Alison said as she looked over him, her face twisting with almost a smile. “I’m just going to ask them to give me your clothes.”

“Excuse me, who are you? How did you get in here?” 

A soft female voice suddenly piped up from the doorway, both Allison and Five looked over with wide eyes to find a middle-aged nurse staring at them both. There was a polite smile on her face that masked her clear suspicion very poorly.

They must paint quite a picture for her. A ‘strange’ black woman standing over a young white boy in a white hospital. 

Five really hated the sixties.

“I am…” Allison hesitated, an equally polite smile frozen on her face. “His babysitter.”

She smiled sweetly at the nurse, every bit of the award winning actress she was known to be.

Five grit his teeth, and did his best to smile and nod. Allison’s explanation was practical, even if it was annoying, and Allison’s expression told him she knew how much Five hated it.

“Mr and Mrs Hargreeves hired me to take care of him and his siblings while they’re out of town on vacation,” Allison smiled even harder. “He got bullied by his older brothers and ran away. I’m so glad someone found him.” 

Five watched the nurse’s expression, his heart sinking when he saw her expression grow cold. She wasn’t buying it at all.

“Thank you for taking care of him,” Allison continued, exuding gratitude and relief. “I’ll be able to take him home to his family now.”

“Well.” The nurse’s face drooped with disapproval. “You’ve certainly done an excellent job watching this child. If you would give me his parents’ contact details, I will be reporting to them what you’ve done to him.”

Five sighed internally as Allison’s smile froze on her face. This was why he wanted to leave sooner rather than later. Maybe he should have called Luther instead of counting on Allison’s power to get them both out without incident. Of all the times for her sister to go through some sort of moral crisis about her power, she had to pick the 1960s.

Though Five supposed Allison hadn’t picked it, Five was the one who had stranded her here. Fuck. He had no idea how to even begin making up for the shit she must have gone through because of him.

“And don’t think I’m going to let this boy go with you after what you’ve clearly done to him.” The nurse continued, rambling in her self-righteous rage. “You’re the one who beat this poor boy, aren’t you? He is half starved, look at how skinny he is! I bet you haven’t fed him properly in days. I’ve always known that your people couldn’t be trusted with looking after our children, you-”

The moment the slurs started coming out, Five decided it was enough.

“Would you shut the fuck up?” Five said suddenly, cutting off the woman’s tirade before it could get any more abusive.

Allison’s was shaking with rage next to him, her hands clenched into fists. She looked about ready to punch the woman herself. 

Five was tempted to do it for her, at this point. Calling Allison had definitely been a mistake. What a way to fuck up on top of passing out in the damn street.

The nurse started at Five’s interjection, and glared at him in outrage. “Excuse me, young man. I am tr-”

That was it. Five hopped off of the bed and then immediately crumpled as his legs refused to take his weight.

“Five!” Allison and the nurse rushed forward at the same time. Allison, who was closest, caught Five before he could end up completely sprawled across the floor. 

The nurse closed the distance between them rapidly, then started trying to pull Allison away as even more hate spewed from her mouth.

Pulling on all of his strength, Five threw himself forward and punched her to shut her up.

“Five!” Allison shouted, her arms wrapping around Five as the nurse reeled back with a cry of pain.

Dammit. Five was still too weak from whatever the hell it was they gave him to knock the woman out. Five refused to believe it was just a matter of exhaustion.

Five kicked the woman in the shins.

The nurse stumbled back, shouting.

“Five what are you-” Allison fumbled awkwardly, trying to pull him back from the racist nurse.

“Just let me go-” Five lunged forward, fighting Allison as her arms tightened around his frame.

“I-I heard-” Allison stammered. “I heard a rumor that you forgot everything that just happened and think everything’s fine!”

The nurse’s eyes flashed white, and then confusion fell across her face as she stared at both of them in surprise.

Five relaxed in Allison’s arms, and cautiously watched the woman.

Beside him, Allison smiled nervously, and spoke again before the nurse in front of them could come to the wrong conclusion. “I heard a rumor that you completely trust me with this boy and have no problems with me taking him home. And that you will bring me his clothes.”

The woman’s eyes flashed white again as Allison’s power took hold. Then, a friendly smile unfolded over her face.

“Well, it’s so good that you’re here to pick him up. Let me go get his clothes so you can take him home,” the woman said gently, before she turned and walked out of the room, still smiling.

“Finally,” Five sagged in Allison’s arms the moment they were alone again. “You should have just done that from the start.” 

“Five-” Allison sighed, though strangely enough, her arms tightened even more around him. “Is there anything you won’t do to get what you want?” 

“Of course,” Five answered without missing a beat. “It just happens that beating up some racist asshole isn’t on the list.”

A tremor went through Allison behind him, and then, weirdly enough, she started shaking with laughter. 

Five, feeling guilty for being the reason she’d just gone through the abuse, stood there and let her get it out of her system.

“God, I hate the past so much,” Allison mumbled after a moment, her arms loosening around Five. “Think you can stand?”

“I’ll be okay,” Five said quietly, carefully balancing himself. “Just give me your arm on the way out.”

“Alright,” Allison said, watching him with an uncomfortably soft smile on her face.

“And… sorry about that,” Five said. He’d underestimated just how messed up the period was when he decided to call her. “I won’t let it happen again.”

He was going to get her out of this time and back to 2019. That and also make sure he didn’t pass out again.

“Well,” Allison said, eyes gentle as she considered him. “You can make it up to me by buying me lunch.”

“Fine,” Five said, hoping his money would still be in his pockets when his clothes showed up again. “You can even choose where.”

Though, all things considered, pickpocketing some random so he could feed Allison was something Five was definitely willing to do.

“Getting you into a black diner is going to take a bit of explaining, though,” Allison murmured beside him suddenly.

Five sighed. He couldn’t wait to get back to 2019.

[talpup]

Light In the Darkness

Summary: Yami Sukehiro just wanted to join the Magic Knights and make his mentor proud.  He knew there would be trails.  He knew trouble would come his way.  Knew he would be faced with discrimination for being a foreigner and a peasant.  What he didn’t know.  Didn’t expect.  Was that literal Chaos would come his way.  That he and his mentor’s sister would be at the center of world ending trouble.  Or that he would fall in love with his mentor’s sister and face more than discrimination; but the jealously of Nozel Silva who loved the same woman he did.

Please remember this fic is rated mature and has warnings of violence, abuse, sexual tension, eventual sexual behavior, and other possible triggers.  For a full list of story tags please check the fics AO3 (link to that at the top of my tumblrs homepage).

***Note: Sorry for the late update, my Aunt passed Sunday and things have been kinda hectic.  Anyway, I hope you all enjoy.

Chapter 87

It was ten minutes to eleven on the morning of April fourth.  Despite all that happened two days ago, Yami knew Teris would try to make the meeting they had scheduled with Jon during the Star Awards Festival. It was foolish of her to think that Julius’ Vice Captain would keep such a meeting after everything.  But Teris’ insatiable curiosity would make her go just in case.

Yami stepped into the Black Bulls meeting room that Teris had claimed as a sort of office.  Leaning against the door jam he watched her close a stack of files and get to her feet.  “Where do you think you’re going?”

Even though her back was to him Teris did her best to cover her guilty expression.  “Why ask what you already know?”

Yami shook his head in half amused exasperation.  “We just escaped--”

Teris spun to face him.  “We didn’t escape.  We were freed.  Rescued. By them.  By him.”  She looked away wondering what would’ve happened to Yami if Alowishus Spade hadn’t shown up.  Would she and Nozel have cleared Rayla’s test in time?  Would she and Nozel have survived the test without the Agents of Chaos’ help?

Yami didn’t remember Alowishus showing up.  Too out of it with built up mana burning his body up, he didn’t even know what Teris and Nozel had been put through until yesterday’s group report at Headquarters.  “Jon knows we spent half a day at the Healer’s and most of yesterday at Headquarters.  He won’t be waiting at that tea shop.”

“He knows I’m not unconscious, still holed up at the healers, or barred from leaving the property.  He’ll be there.”  Teris argued.

Yami had to admit Teris had a point.  Jon was well acquainted with Julius’ obsessive nature and unquenchable curiosity, two traits Teris shared with her brother.  “Fine.  Let’s go.”

Teris looked at Yami in concern.  “No.  You don’t--”

“I said let’s go.”  Yami turned, exiting the room.

Teris frowned at Yami’s back and followed him down the hall.  Yami had been out longer than the rest of them.  Teris had sat by his bed at Healer’s Hall after she had woken up mostly recovered.  Though she hadn’t wanted to disturb Yami’s restorative rest, Yami had begun radiating intense cold in his sleep.  It was difficult to tell if he had experienced a communicative dream with the page of Chaos.  Or if everything Yami had been though was the cause of the radiating cold and his disorientation upon waking up.  But it had worried her, further worried her, given all that happened.  Even now Teris still worried for him.  Yami needed to stay home and rest, not travel to Castle City with her.  But telling him that would’ve been pointless.

“Stubborn. Pig headed.”  Teris muttered.

“I think you’re suppose to look in a mirror when you self identify.” Yami caught Teris’ scowl out of the corner of his eye and stopped walking.  Turning to face her, he wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her close.  “Don’t look like that.  I’m letting you go, aren’t I?”

“Letting me--”

Yami’s lips silenced her.  Teris leaned into him, hands gripping his shirt. The somewhat rough kiss turned soft.

Yami pulled back.  The loving sincerity in his eyes belied his jesting tone.  “Just so you know.  That kiss with that mad woman meant nothing.”

“Don’t even play like that.  Not yet.”  Teris held him tighter.  She pressed her face into his chest, soaking in the warmth and smell of him.  She turned her head and listened to his strong steady heartbeat.

Yami held her.  His other hand smooth her hair and pet her back.  It still amazed that Teris loved and cared so much for him.  He hated that he had worried her.  That he hadn’t been strong enough to deal with his building mana.  That he hadn’t stopped their being taken in the first place.

Yami pressed his lips to the crown of her head and breathed in the scent of her.  “We made it out. More than that, we got out of whatever other hell Greywright had in store for us.”

Teris laughed softly at that.  She pulled her head back and looked up at him.  Her mind unwillingly recalled him bound, life fading as his mana built.  If it hadn’t been for Alowishus Spade and the Agents of Chaos, Yami might’ve died.  They all might’ve.

Teris reached up, caressing his cheek.  “Don’t worry me like that again.”

Yami clasped her hand and kissed the inside of her wrist. “I can’t promise you that, Ikigai.”

“Then at least tell me what that word means.” Teris bargained.

Yami smiled down at her.  One day he’d tell her what the word meant. Maybe.  He almost made her a different promise; but it would sound too sappy so he said instead.  “We’re going to be late.  Think Julius will have a problem with just the two of us going somewhere if it’s to meet someone?”

Teris was about to answer that she didn’t care what her brother had a problem with when Julius’ voice sounded.

“No. But I do have a problem with you having secret meetings with my Vice Captain.”  Julius said.

Teris and Yami turned to see Julius’ stern expression. Jon, who stood behind the Azure Deers Captain, at least had the decency to look ashamed.  Though Yami wondered if the shame was for telling Julius about the meeting or getting caught by his Captain.

Julius shook his head in disappointed censure.  “Really you two.  Going behind my back with my Vice Captain.  And after everything you went through two days ago.”

“I was only tagging along to make sure Teris was safe and didn’t get into trouble.”  Yami said.

Teris turned to Yami, eyes wide at the betrayal.

“What? It’s true.  I even tried to talk you out of it.”  Yami told her.

“Not very hard.”  Teris argued.

Yami shrugged a shoulder.  “I know when you’ve made up your mind.”

“And apparently when to bail and serve me up to my brother.”  Teris said.

“Yami, you shouldn’t have let Teris agree to such a meeting in the first place.”  Julius said.

“Let her?  Have you met your sister?  No one lets her do anything.”  Yami said.

“That’s not what you said a moment ago.”  Teris told Yami.

“Wanna work with me here?”  Yami asked Teris.

“Not after you served me up like that.”  Teris said.

“Stop. The both of you.”  Julius silenced.  “Once confronted, Jon explained everything.  His reasoning for making the meeting and what he wanted to speak, or more correctly question you about.”  He looked at Teris.

Teris looked from Julius to Jon, wondering what Jon could have wanted to ask her.

“Commander Greywright and Captain Jax are waiting inside Jax’s office.  Let’s go.”  Julius gestured down the hall in the direction of the Black Bulls Captain’s office.

Teris turned and started walking.  She looked at Julius out of the corner of her eye.  “If you knew about our meeting with Jon; and Greywright--”

“Commander.” Julius corrected, walking beside her.

“--was already here.”  Teris continued.  “Why all this?  Just looking for another reason to get after us?”

“Jax was the one certain you would try to make the meeting.  I was hoping you wouldn’t attempt to go.”  Julius said.

Teris gave a derisive snort.  “To think Jax--”

“Captain Jax.  Come on, Teris.  At least make an effort at propriety.” Julius implored.

Teris huffed.  “I thought you knew me better.”

Julius looked at his sister wondering if she was referring to her attempt at making the meeting or her disregard of proper use of titles.

Yami entered his Captain's office. “I hope there were stakes in that bet you made with Julius.”

“Don’t sound so proud.”  Jax scolded Yami.  He grinned at Julius.  “You’re covering my tab at the Boiling Brew this month.”

Julius closed the door behind Jon.  “And here I thought you’d be drinking and gaming less since you’re sending Gilly what amounts to Bronn’s pension.”

Jax’s expression sobered.  His eyes looked over the others in nervous discomfort.

Julius caught himself far too late and softly apologized to his friend. “Sorry.”

“Is Gilly having trouble?”  Teris questioned in concern.

“If it’s that hard for her why hasn’t she come back?  Healers Hall would take her back, wouldn’t they?”  Yami asked.

“She doesn’t want to come back.  And unlike retired Magic Knights and Castle Knights, or their families if a Knight dies in service; Healers, Sentries, and Investigations Mages don’t receive some sort of monthly payment.”  Jax said.

The weight Julius constantly carried on his shoulders suddenly felt heavier at the reminder of all he had to do and change once he became Wizard King if he hoped to make things better for the kingdom and those that served it.

Jax straightened in his seat, clearing his throat as he went on.  “Bronn and Gilly were counting on his pension to supplement the lack of payment for her work as a—  You know what?  I don’t have to explain myself to anyone.  It’s my money and I’m sending her some. It’s what Bronn would’ve wanted.  Expected.  And that’s all there is to it.”

“I think it’s sweet, Captain.”  Teris said.

Yami found it honorable and gave Jax a small nod of approval.  Greywright did as well.

Jax eased a bit and ordered his Vice Captain’s.  “Sit down.”

He looked at the sofa positioned across the two upholstered chairs he and Greywright sat in.  There was no way Julius, Jon, Yami, and Teris would fit comfortably on the couch.

Pointing at the chairs in front of his desk, Jax told the Azure Deers.  “Just take a pile off one of those--”  He fell silent seeing Julius grab both chairs and pass one to Jon.  “What happened to the stack of—there were—Teris.” He turned to her.  “Have you been taking piles out of my office and doing my work?”

“No... Yes.”  Teris grimaced.  “Maybe a bit.”

“Don’t scold her for doing your ignored work.”  Greywright told Jax.  He looked at Teris.  “Though I don’t think your making many friends in the file clerks office at Investigations.  Nevertheless.  Good work.  Keep it up.  At least someone’s finally getting things done around here.”

Jax eyed Teris.  “We’ll discuss how Vice Captain’s aren’t suppose to make their Captain’s look bad, later.”

“Should’ve given both of them that talk after the Star Awards.  Or better yet, before.”  Julius told Jax.  He saw Teris’ expression and said. “No.  Getting captured and experiment on by some magical scientist from the Spade Kingdom doesn’t negate the censure you and Yami should get for causing such a commotion.”

“It wasn’t just us.”  Teris reminded.

Leaning forward in his chair, Greywright told Julius. “As the one tasked by Sir Jorah with disciplining them, I say it does.  Leave them alone least I bring up past disciplinary issues we’ve have with you, Captain.”

Julius’ eyes lowered in embarrassed shame.

Teris pressed her lips together fighting a smile.  Julius was perfect. Alright, almost perfect.  Other then the incident at Magic Investigations after Yami and she got the History of Chaos, Teris couldn’t think of a single time in her brothers career as a Magic Knight that was anything but proper, honorable, and upstanding.

Jax outright laughed at the Commander’s censure of his friend.

Greywright turned his eyes on the Black Bulls Captain.  “I’ve got plenty of stories that’ll embarrass you too Jax, so shut it.”

Jax quickly sobered.

Greywright looked over the small gathering before telling Yami and Teris. “We’re here to discuss Advisor Ellara.”

Teris turned to Jon, eyebrows furrowed in confusion.  “Is that what you wanted to meet about?”

Seated beside Teris on the sofa, Yami looked at Jax.  “You’re finely going to explain like you promised.”

“I hadn’t forgotten.”  Jax told Yami, appreciating how patient Yami had been.

Teris’ eyes darted around the men in the room trying make sense of what they were saying.  “I’m missing something.”

“Let’s start at the beginning, shall we.”  Greywright said.

They started with the suspicions about Ellara that had led to Bronn being tasked with following her, and ended with Greywright telling how he knew the Ellara that came to the safe house Teris had been kept at hadn’t been the real Advisor.

Yami’s frown had grown more and more severe as Greywright, Julius, and Jax told them everything.  When they were done Yami sat back and crossed his arms.  “I could've told you that was the real Ellara without hearing the end.  There’s no way Bronn would’ve lost her.  The bastard was too good a Mage.”

“So—you’re saying that Advisor Ellara is working with the Agents of Chaos.  And that the person that who showed up to our safe house the night of the Winter Solstice wasn’t Advisor Ellara but a Transformation Mage. That Bronn, who was tasked with following Ellara, didn’t lose her but followed the real Advisor to the geyser labyrinth where he was...“  Teris’ words faded.  She hadn’t gone to the scene once Bronn’s body had been found; but she could imagine it well enough. The question she had wondered back then returned, seeming all the more important given this recent information.  Why the  geyser labyrinth?

Greywright nodded.

“And you can’t take any of this to Sir Jorah because she might be using her magic to affect him.”  Teris finished.

Greywright nodded again.

Teris looked to her brother. The fact that he didn’t look sick with distress told her Julius had suspected Ellara of using her magic on Sir Jorah for quite some time. She swallowed, mouth suddenly dry.

Yami placed a steadying hand on her knee.  With what he had overheard and sensed in their Ki when Advisor Ellara was around or they spoke of her, he had surmised some kind of trouble; but nowhere close to this extent.

Teris barely registered Yami’s touch.  Her heart banged in her chest, rushing blood roaring in her ears like a tidal wave in a storm. She recalled the last Entrance Exams when she had been lost and looking for the arena viewing room.  How Ellara had acted and asked about the communicative dreams with the page of Chaos.  How Ellara had offered to help her try and remember.  How she had asked if she could see the scars on her chest.  Wait.  Did that mean Ellara had been there during the Summer Solstice?

Teris shoved the unsettling thought away and focused on another disturbing question.  “So the reason Alowishus and his lunatic lackeys showed up at Rayla’s was because of her?  Ellara got word to him, telling what happened and where to look for us.”

“I got to the scene far too late to see anything.  The only thing I was able to tell was the way the wind was blowing.”  Julius said.

“Which was enough.”  Jax said, attempting to make Julius feel better. “From the lack of ground disturbance and signs of struggle we figured it was a passive attack.  Kess and I were able to find where they had stood, letting the toxin magic travel on the wind to where you all had been.”

Feeling like a failure, Julius sighed. “It still gave us nothing to go on.  We had no better clue who had taken you, where you were, or why you all were taken.  How Ellara could've figured it out and got word to the Agents of Chaos is a mystery. Maybe all she did was get word to them and they figured it out.  In any case when we were called into Sir Jorah’s office and told that you all had been taken…”  His eyes unfocused, remembering Ellara’s tension and expression.  “Her concern was real.”

“Just because the Agents of Chaos got us, or rather you two out of immediate danger doesn’t mean they have your interests or well being in mind.”  Greywright told Yami and Teris.

“Of course not.  They helped cause they still need us for at least one more ritual if not more.”  Yami looked at the Commander and two Captain’s seeing that they too knew that their concerns over this past winter solstice had been for not.  Sighing he confessed.  “I’ve been contacted by the page of Chaos at least twice since the solstice.”

“What about Olsen?”  Teris asked, at the same time as Yami’s admission.

Yami turned to Teris.  “What about Olsen?”

Teris stared at Yami, her concern realized.  “Why haven’t you told me!”

“First things first.”  Greywright said.  “Yam--”

“Commander Greywright.”  A voice sounded.

Greywright pulled the communication crystal from his pocket.  “I’m in a meeting.”  He said informing the person that he wasn’t alone should the message be confidential as well as not to bother him if the message could wait.

“There’s been two Wild Fire outbreaks in the Forsaken Realm.  One near Hornsby.  The other just outside of Hage.”  The voice said.

“Actual Wild Fire?”  Greywright questioned.

“Yes, sir.  Teams of Magic Knights have been dispatched but there are multiple outbreaks at both locations.”  The voice said.

Jax used his rock magic to shake the foundations of the house, signaling anyone home to gather in the great room and await orders.

“Sir Jorah wants you at Hage.  It’s the closest to the Spade Kingdom border.”  The voice went on.

“I’ll report back once I assess the situation.”  Greywright said, already rising to his feet.

Jax, Julius, Jon, Yami, and Teris were already making for the door.

Seeing them coming down the hall, Tobin questioned.  “Captain?”

“Olsen and I found a system that worked well together during the Wild Fire near Clade.”  Yami told Jax and Greywright.

“Wild Fire?”  Olsen echoed.

“You and Olsen with me.” Greywright told Yami. He glanced at Jax trusting the man to know better than he.  “I need a few to help get the people of Hage to safety.”

“Iban, Venice, Abril.  You’re with Greywright.”  Jax stepped to the Blood Mage.  “This is not the time for your games.  If I hear of one complaint you’re done.”

“Yes, sir.”  Iban smirked.

“Teris, Tobin, Gendry, Bran.  You’re with me in Hornsby.”  Jax said.

Julius stepped forward.  “Jon and I will--”

Greywright held up a hand to Julius.  “From what I understand, you used all of your mana stopping that bridge from collapsing yesterday.  You’ll be of little use out there.  Sorry, Julius.  I can’t be worrying about you.  You stay.”

“I’ll take Jon.”  Jax said, with a sympathetic look to his friend.

Julius’ hands fisted as the two groups disappeared; Greywright using a transportation crystal, Teris light traveling the others.  Proud as he was that his sister seemed to finally be getting a handle on the spell, he was disgusted with himself.  Great as it was to save several dozens of people yesterday as he single-handedly slowed an explosion and stopped a rushing river all the while halting a bridge’s collapse, what kind of Wizard King would he be if he couldn’t save people today because his efforts yesterday had taken up so much of his mana?

He simply had to get stronger.

87.2

Bran was relieved and impressed Teris had light traveled their group without leaving them with so much as a sunburn; though his vision was still a bit spotty on arrival from her magics intense light.  Still, his Vice Captain must’ve been putting in some serious time training.

As Bran’s vision cleared he looked over the area in horrored awe. “When they said multiple, they weren’t kidding.”

“Teris. Start incinerating a kilometer wide break between the flames and the town.” Jax ordered.

Teris balked.

“One strong gust and it’ll jump any smaller break.”  Jax said.

Stopping the spread and saving lives was more important than the farmlands crops that would be destroyed.  Even so, Jax hated giving the order and didn’t envy Teris the job.

Teris gave a stiff nod and disappeared, setting to work.

“Bran. Get to a safe distance and control a beast of burden that’s hitched to a wagon, take it to find anyone stuck out in the fields and get them back to town.  Jon, Tobin, Gendry.”  Jax rolled his neck.  “Let’s get to work.”

They worked well into the night.  Even with the addition of several teams of Magic Knights, they still struggled.  There were just too many fires.

Mereoleona wiped her brow.  “It’s no use, Jax.  It’s like the stuff’s been condensed, burning hotter and faster than any Wild Fire should. You were the first on the scene.  You have to call it.”

Jax ground his teeth.  To leave it and admit defeat would've meant burning everything within a two kilometer perimeter in a best case scenario.  Given the higher volatility of the Wild Fire and the seasons stronger wind gusts, it would mean doubling the firebreaks to four kilometers.  Doing so would mean taking out a quarter of Hornsby itself.  But it was either that or chance the fire jumping and losing the whole town, possibly more.

The Black Bulls Captain swallowed. “Four kilometers. Get every fire mage burning a break of four kilometers.”

Mereoleona stared.  “Including the earlier one kilometer break?”

“Burn four more kilometers.”  Jax snapped.  “I’ll send a team to oversee the evacuation of the populace from the parts of Hornsby that will be lost.”

Mereoleona growled.  While she would’ve made the same call if in Jax’s position, it didn’t make the order any easier to carry out.

“Captain!” Randall pointed.

Mereoleona and Jax turned, Mereoleona thinking she had to teach Randall how to better use his words.  She scratched that notion instantly seeing what Randall had been pointing to.  Even in the green-white smoke and flames the line of Sorcery Lances from the Spade Kingdom were clearly visible due to their numbers.  The mass was five hundred meters out at most.

“Retribution for the death of one of their leading scientist?”  Win guessed, the Green Mantis Captain coming up beside them with Jack at his side.

“They took our Commander and Knights first.”  Mereoleona sneered, wanting to kill them for taking her brother.

“You think they’ll hold off fighting so we can explain that to them?” Win wondered.

“Since they’re probably the ones that started this mess.  Doubtful.” Jax said, and muttered.  “Why did I have to be the one that showed up first?”

“Quit complaining.  I’ll take command if you want.”  Mereoleona said.

“And never live it down!  I don’t think so.”  Knowing the citizenry’s safety was of paramount importance, Jax told Mereoleona.  “Help the other fire mages create a four kilometer break that extends fifteen hundred meters to the right and left of Hornsby. Then come join the fight and push the Sorcery Lances back with utmost hostility.”

Mereoleona almost argued, wanting to stay and fight; but her oath as a Magic Knight stated the safety of the citizens came first. “Keep Randall.  He’ll be able to divert some of the Wild Fire flames with his air magic.”

“You’ll have to order someone to clear out the populace.”  Jax told her, as he’d be too busy to send a team the way he had planned.

Kess appeared at Jax’s side.

“I’m taking Neyres.”  Mereoleona told the Silver Eagles Captain.

Kess nodded.

Mereoleona turned to her brother and the other Fire Mage on her squad.  “Leon! Forte!  Four kilometer addition to the break starting with fifteen hundred meters spreading to either side of town.  Neyres!  Go with them.”

Eyes wide at the level of destruction their order entailed, the three nodded and took off.

“Big guy!”  Mereoleona called to Tobin as she passed.

Tobin turned.

“Need you to kick some people out of their homes. Carry them if you have to.”  Mereoleona said.

“I can force them out.  Make the air in their homes just noxious enough.”  Win offered.

“Your toxin magic is needed to wipe out Sorcery Lances.”  Jax told the Green Mantis Captain in between issuing his own orders.

On her way to met and help Fuegoleon, Forte, and Neyres, Mereoleona caught sight of the Azure Deers Sonic Mage battling a wall of Wild Fire.  “Emelia!  Go help Tobin.”  She pointed at the Black Bulls Giant Mage who had raced ahead of her.  “He’ll explain your orders.  Just don’t permanently deafen the citizenry unless you have to.”

Emelia blinked, perplexed, and nodded; rushing after Tobin.

“Burning down some poor peasants home after kicking them out.  Jax better save a squad of Sorcery Lances for me to beat to a pulp.”  Mereoleona muttered under her breath.

Jax scanned the field and questioned.  “Where’s my Vice Captain?”

Jack had subtlety done what he could to keep track of Teris for Yami, not that the big lug would ever ask.  Having recently found her after losing track of her for a time, Jack opened his mouth to answer.  But before he could a flash of light lit up the night making the fiery surroundings seem dim.

“Never mind.”  Jax rushed to join the fight.  The others falling in beside and behind him.

87.2.2

Nozel stood a dozen paces away from Teris leaving them both room to fight. In the heat of the surrounding Wild Fire he was having trouble keeping the density of his mercury for his mercury rain spell to be effective.  He’d have to remember to work on that during his and Fuegoleon’s training sessions.

“At least we can see the enemy this time.”  Nozel quipped to Teris.

Teris huffed, surprised that Nozel would make a jest in the middle of a battle.

Nozel hated to admit it but if the three Agents of Chaos hadn’t shown to assist them, they definitely wouldn’t have completed Rayla’s test in time to save Yami’s life.  A part of him wondered if he and Teris would've made it out of the so called test alive.  Though that didn’t speak to the greatness or superiority of the Spade Kingdoms fighting force.  If anything him and Teris holding out so long spoke of their capability given their exhaustion, wounds, and the magic dampening cuffs.

Teris saw one of the Sorcery Lances prepare to throw something.  The action notable because it didn’t look like the man was preparing for a magical assault.  She caught sight of a small jar just as it was leaving the Sorcery Lances hand.

“Nozel!” Teris light traveled to the Silver Eagle, wrapped her arms around him, and light traveled away right before Wild Fire erupted where he had stood.

Nozel blinked, sight slowly returning from the blinding light.  He looked over Teris’ shoulder at the green-white flames. “Are they crazy!”

The Wild Fire posed as much danger to the Sorcery Lances as it did to them.  As the night cooled the wind swirled, slowly changing directions.  It caused the flames to spread all the more quickly and unpredictably.

Teris growled seeing the Sorcery Lance who had thrown the jar pull out another.

Nozel reached out trying to grab her.  “Teris!”

Teris sprinted and launched herself at the man.

“Teris!” Jax yelled.

Teris and the Sorcery Lance went tumbling.  The jar broke, Wild Fire exploding around them.

Nozel made for the flames.

Reaching him, Jack and Jon held Nozel back.

Teris pushed up to her knees and away from the charred Sorcery Lance.  The Mages form crumbled into a pile dust beneath her. She clamped a hand over her mouth, stifling a shocked noise of disgust.  That’s when she noticed it.  The tell tale green-white flames of Wild Fire.  It was burning on her the same way it did on water. While it hurt and took everything she had not to writhe and scream, the flames didn’t burn her flesh.

Teris collapsed onto all fours, the pain growing.  The dim glow that had been radiating from her since the Wild Fire strike brightened. As it did so, the heat coming off her intensified.

Teris screamed.

Though not as consuming, the feeling was similar to the morning of the Summer Solstice.

Jax grimaced at his Vice Captain's agonized cry.  Teris shouldn’t be alive, but she was.  Though he didn’t have time to be grateful for that.  From the looks of it, Teris’ mana and magic was rising to somehow burn out the Wild Fire.  The deduction set his galloping heart to race even faster as another shot of adrenaline coursed through him.

“Shields!” Jax yelled, pulling up a thick wall of stone long enough to shelter those beside and just behind him.

He looked about and cursed.  There were too many Magic Knights incapable of creating the type of shield that could withstand an exploding force; and they were too spread apart to reach someone who was. After over six hours of using his magic to bury and snuff out Wild Fires, he simply didn’t have the mana store left to create numerous thick rock walls to shield everyone.

Blinking the sweat out of his eyes, Nozel gritted his teeth and created a massive curved wall of mercury that sheltered all the Magic Knight’s. It didn’t matter how tired and drained he was, he was the royal heir of House Silva.  What kind of Vice Captain would he be if he didn’t risk his own life to protect his comrades.

Seeing what the Silver Eagle was attempting, Jon used his magic to freeze the space around the liquid metal.  Thanks to the Azure Deers’ assistance Nozel was able to strengthen and thicken the shield wall.

There was a brief moment of deafening silence as if time and space itself held its breath.  Then, an explosion of light.

The banging shock wave whipped the air around in frenzied howl.  Dirt and clumps of debris rained down.

Ears ringing, Jax stood and looked over the stone wall to check on Teris. He found a lingering shield wall of mercury, so thin he could see through it.

Weak and woozy, Nozel gave Jon a clumsy nod.  There was no way his mercury would’ve withstood the blast if it weren’t for the man’s assistance.  He had barely managed to hold it as it was.

Jon gave the Silver Eagle a returning nod, knowing several Magic Knights would’ve perished if not for Nozel’s quick thinking and magical power.

The Magic Knights stood to find that the surrounding Wild Fires had been burned out by the explosion of incinerating light.

Teris slowly uncurled, the pain and searing heat subsiding.

“Impressive.” A voice said, from above her.

Teris opened her eyes and saw a Sorcery Lance standing over her.  He stepped back as she got slowly to her feet on unsteady legs.

“You took out more than half of my forces.  And that wasn’t even combining your magic with the Dark Magic User.” The man’s eyes lifted and scanned the field.  “Where is he by the way?”

“You can’t have him.”  Teris told, her growl far less threatening given her panting breath and clear fatigue.

The Sorcery Lance looked back at her.  “I have no interest in either of you, child.  My King might, once he learns what you’re capable of on your own.  We heard you were a powerful force when combined but had no idea what you were capable of alone.”

“Good luck relaying the message dead.”  Teris said.

“You don’t want to fight me.  After an release of mana like that...”  The Sorcery Lance shook his head.  “Look at you. You can barely stand.”

“Teris. Get back.”  Jax ordered making his way to her.  “This one’s mine.”

The Sorcery Lance smiled.  “Vice Captain Jax.”

“It’s Captain.”  Jax corrected.

“So the Magic Knights promotes failures?  I see why the Clover Kingdom will never be a threat to us.”  The man taunted.

Jax stepped in front of Teris.

The Colonel smirked.  “Attempting to protect yet another girl, Jax.  This one your lover too?  Looks kind of young; but who am I to judge.” He blocked Jax’s attack with a pool of lava that melted the rock.  “You’re going to have to try harder then that Captain. Unless you want to lose this girl too.”

Teris was buffeted back by a cloud of volcanic ash.  Jon grabbed her by the arm.  Not knowing who it was, Teris spun, nearly falling over in the process.

“It’s okay.”  Jon calmed.  “Let’s get you out of here.”

“No. I can still fight.” Teris said, looking back at her battling Captain.

Kess looked at Win, the Green Mantis being the senior Captain.

“I have two tones.  Scary and snide. Don’t see either one working on her. You order her back.”  Win told Kess.

Kess glared.  She stepped to Teris.  “Teris.”

Teris turned to the Silver Eagles Captain.  “I can--”

Still holding Teris steady, Jon was able to stop her fall.  He looped her arm over his shoulder and held up her unconscious body.

“Get her to safety, Vice Captain.”  Kess ordered Jon.

Not wanting to leave Kess in this mess, Jon questioned.  “Captain?”

“You heard me.”  Kess snapped, daring her boyfriend to challenge her command.

“I can take her.”  Nozel offered.

“You’re with me.”  Kess told her Vice Captain.  She gave Jon a hard look.

“Yes, sir.”  Jon submitted.  “Be careful.”

Kess turned away, ignoring his concern.  She was Captain of the Silver Eagles.  While a part of her found Jon’s care sweet, the greater part of her found it insulting.

Knowing Nozel was weakened from shielding them from the blast, Kess ordered. “Nozel, hold this line and stop any Sorcery Lances that get passed us.”  She raised her voice.  “Everyone else.  Take out or push back the Sorcery Lances still standing.”

87.2.3

“I can make it to safety.”  Teris said, having regained consciousness. “Go back and help the others.”

“You can barely stand.  What if you lose consciousness again?  I’m not--”  Jon tensed seeing a creature coming out of the smoke. “What’s an elk doing in the middle of a Wild Fire?”

Bleary eyed, Teris turned to the animal.  “Bran?”

The elks head lowered and raised in an odd nod.

“Good man.” Teris praised. To Jon she said.  “Help me up.”

Jon looked uncertain.  “Teris, I--”

“Hornsby is at least eight kilometers out.  It’ll take forever for you to get me there.  With the other Magic Knights still burning the break to protect the town, they need you fighting.”

Jon looked at her.  He could hardly argue.  It was why he had faltered at Kess’ order.  If only Teris wasn’t so weakened and could light travel to safety.

“Alright.” Jon relented.  “But you have to get to Hornsby and stay.  Swear to me, Teris.”

“I’m not stupid or have a death wish.”  Teris told.

Jon could've argued with that but didn’t.  He looked up at the elk wondering how he was going to get a mostly dead weight Teris on it when the beast laid down.  He helped Teris on and stood back.  The creature rose.  Teris began to slide off.  Jon rushed forward, reaching out.

Teris managed to hold on and right herself.  “I’m good.  I’m good.”

Jon looked at up at her thinking this a terrible idea. She would have to go through a storm of Wild Fire. What if she fell off or lost consciousness again? What if she ran into a team of Sorcery Lance’s? An eruption of lava flew into the sky.  The ash cloud ballooned out, further covering them in dust and smoke.

“Go!” Jon ordered, already rushing back to the fight.

Teris’ arms tightened around the elks neck.  The elk ran, avoiding green flames.  The beast lept over downed burning trees that had been set aflame by the Wild Fires heat.  Teris lost all sense of direction in the dense smoke.  She buried her face into the crevice of her arm and the beasts neck.  It was a battle just to hold on and stay conscious.

Teris managed to last until the end of the break.  Her arms loosened unable to hold on anymore.  She fell off the elk with a thud.

“Teris!” Bran rushed to her.

He controlled the animal long enough to trot it a safe distance so it wouldn’t trample them and released it.  The elk darted away to safety.

Bran knelt and lifted Teris up onto her knees.  He swung her arm around his neck and stood them up.  “You’re heavier than you look, Vice Captain.”

“Bran.” Teris breathed, her slow blinking eyes unfocused.  “Never tell a woman that.”

“Yes, sir.  Sorry, sir.”  Bran stumbled and they both fell over.

“Leave me and go be useful.”  Teris ordered, barely holding on to consciousness.

Bran stood them up again.

Teris frowned vision spotting.  “I said go be useful.  Don’t disobey--”

“Seeing my Vice Captain to safety is being useful.”  Bran argued.

Teris would've called him a cheeky smart-ass but her vision tunneled and she lost consciousness.

87.3

Given what Greywright had heard from Mereoleona, who had commanded Yami on two separate battlefields, the Knights Commander had expected to have trouble keeping Yami from moving too far into the enemy’s line. But that wasn’t a problem.  Greywright figured it had to do with Yami now being Vice Captain and feeling a greater sense of responsibility for the other Magic Knights.  Though that’s not to say Yami didn’t move further ahead than Greywright would’ve liked.  But the Vice Captain didn’t lose himself in the battle and always seemed to pull himself back right before Greywright felt the need to call him back.

The Magic Knights Commander hadn’t seen Yami fight since the Squad Challenge over a year and a half ago.  Yami’s growth in ability and power, both magical and physical, was impressive.  Yami’s unique, more physically fighting style meant that those facing him for the first time dealt with an adjustment period. In most cases Yami had his foe incapacitated or killed before that adjustment was realized.

The Colonel leading the Sorcery Lances called for retreat.

Yami and a few other Magic Knights made to follow.

“Let them go.”  Greywright commanded.  “We’ve still got a village to save and Wild Fires to put out.  Charlotte.  William.  Abril.  Follow the Sorcery Lances at a distance.  Make sure they cross the boarder and don’t turn back for another attack.  Yami. Olsen.  Get back and deal with the fires closest to the village.  Take three others with you.  The rest of you.  Focus on the most outer fires and work your way in.  Tryn.  Siren.  Continued working on that break. Two kilometers.”

“Venice. Alecdora.  Puli.  With me.”  Yami ordered.

Greywright watched Alecdora glare daggers at the Black Bulls Vice Captain as he followed behind Puli, Olsen, and Venice in Yami’s wake. The Golden Dawn was a noble who didn’t respect anyone that he considered socially beneath him.  It was obvious the Sand Mage wasn’t fond of having to obey a foreigner on how best to save Hage, a peasant village out in the Forsaken Realm. That said Greywright didn’t see Yami tolerating disobedience well. He just hoped Yami was capable of controlling his temper well enough not to land Alecdora in the infirmary.

Comments are VERY MUCH appreciated and really make my day.  Thank you to those who have left hearts.  And a special THANK YOU to those who have recently left comments or re-blogged. They really mean a lot.

Next chapter snippet:

Yami pulled his hand free and leaned forward, forearms resting on his thighs. He hadn’t caught that, and understood why Teris would be upset about it.  They faced so many dangers already.  To learn that there were even more groups wanting at them only added to the danger. Yet what good would knowing do?  Greywright had known of the Spade Kingdoms interest in them and had wound up in Rayla’s lab right along with them.  They had thought they’d known the Agents of Chaos wanted them for the Winter Solstice.  Wrong as they were, the Agents of Chaos had proven they knew exactly where they had been hidden and could get to them.

[marybeatriceofmodena]

Ben Solo’s Story Arc - An Autopsy

This will be the second post before I publish the full TROS review, mainly because it’s yet another thing I want to get out of the way first. After which, I’ll be posting an announcement about the future of this blog, but no worries – I’ll be sticking around.

After Rey and her parentage, I’ll be talking about Ben here specifically – mainly because I have a pretty big inkling that his plotline for TROS was mutilated, and that he initially actually had an arc.

Except, somewhere in the executive meddling, for reasons I myself am not sure of (okay, I got some theories but it’s pointless to share them here), it got cut.

The Rise of Kylo Ren might be an inkling that there was something more in the works, also that when it comes to its take on Snoke, it directly contradicts things TROS sets up. The simplest explanation is that the Lucasfilm Story Group had a hand in TRoKR, and not for TROS. But even then… the comic reveals things that make me BAFFLED they didn’t put that in the films. I don’t want to be that person who thinks 30 minutes of TLJ should have been dedicated to Snoke’s origins, but stuff like how Ben didn’t even destroy Luke’s Jedi Camp? THAT’S the kind of thing you need to include in your film.

Also, I 110% believe the rumors that JJ Abrams just ignored the Story Group’s existence entirely. Wanna know why? Just the fact that Exogol is established as the Sith world… when we know thanks to The Clone Wars that it’s Moraband – which would have been super easy to use. But fuck continuity I guess.

I will say though, I am NOT surprised it’s leaking out that the movie was severely tempered with and was constantly changing during production, simply because from my first (and only) viewing… I could tell something was wrong. Namely, I could tell that Ben’s arc had been mutilated – and the more I think about it, the more glaring it gets. It’s not even that I’m mad that Adam Driver (aka Golden Globe/Academy Award nominee Adam Driver) gets relegated to playing Darth Exposition for 75% of the film (and godawful exposition at that), it’s literally that so much of what remains of his arc makes no sense, and it affects Palpatine and Rey by extension.

I explained why Rey’s character arc was butchered here, and I’ve also talked about how Palpatine’s implication in her arc didn’t work either, so I won’t talk about it too much here, nor do you need to have read it prior in order to understand this post. I will also point out that a lot of what will be my speculation – so for all I know, I could be wrong, but I’m trying to fill in the holes here.

So, for starters… somehow, Ben knows that Palpatine is still alive. Somehow, he knows how to get to him. AND SOMEHOW, THE WRITERS DECIDED NOT EXPLAINING SHIT WAS THE WAY TO GO. This is not even on the level of not explaining who the fuck Snoke is in the two previous films – while I do think there could have been a throwaway line in TLJ, it didn’t “hinder” the story.

HOWEVER, not explaining how Palpatine is still around and kicking (well, he’s on life support so kicking might be a little too flattering), why he decided to reveal himself right there, right then, and how the hell Ben knows he’s around, how he figured out how to get to Exogol using the holocrons… THAT IS A BIG PROBLEM. This is the triggering element of the rising action in your story. But before you do that, YOU. NEED. EXPOSITION. TO. SET. UP. THE. CONTEXT. OF. YOUR. STORY.

What TROS did would be like skipping Finn’s intro when he’s with his Stormtrooper squad on Jakku, removing the interrogation with Poe and Kylo entirely, and just start TFA with him escaping with Poe without any explanation given. Oh, and also cut out Rey’s introduction as well, and we first meet her when she kicks Finn’s ass in Niima Outpost. You’d just have a bunch of characters coming out of nowhere, and you’d have no frigging clue what they’re doing, and what they want. And that’s what TROS does with Ben and Palpatine.

Take the handling of Snoke, for instance. I’d be a lot more mad about the Snoke retconning if it wasn’t for… what I’m going to call the “Snoke Stew” (and I’d crack a joke about how it was probably made with the DNA of a guy called Stu, which is not funny but still funnier than most of the jokes in TROS). That’s pretty much the one thing that stops me from being mad, because of how STUPID it is.

But the explanation for Snoke’s origins just… retcons so much that has been established before, INCLUDING INFO FROM A COMIC THAT CAME OUT AFTER TROS. We knew Snoke had a past, even if we weren’t privy to it yet. We did kind of know that he was a rich guy, like all the shitty rich people we saw in Canto Bight, who happened to be a Dark Sider and was seemingly smart enough to kill his way to the top. Considering how exploitative the First Order is when it comes to resources and that a rich patron would be welcomed with open arms, it makes sense.

With the explanation given by TROS, it just provides a fuck ton of plotholes to the fact he took over the First Order while killing off old Imperial higher-ups to establish himself as Supreme Leader. Do you really think a guy in a golden bathrobe would just be able to take over out of fucking nowhere because he killed all the higher-ups? No. And even if some of the higher-ups knew that Snoke was a Palps plant (like Pryde seems to), I doubt Ben would have stayed Supreme Leader for as long as a year.

But that’s not even the biggest problem! Seriously, I don’t know if Palps is senile in this film, because we got an ENTIRE trilogy explaining how the guy is one of the worst evil masterminds to have ever lived, in the Galaxy Far Far Away and even in today’s culture. Here, you don’t even understand what the fuck he even wants! I’m “guessing” he fucked with Ben to get his revenge on Anakin, because he uses Ben as his lackey while being seemingly totally oblivious that Ben is working against him (what happened to “every voice in your head”???). He wants Ben to kill Rey… while knowing Rey is his granddaughter, and while telling her when she shows up that he wants to use her as a new host or some shit. Seriously, MAKE UP YOUR MIND ALREADY.

This said… I honestly wonder if Ben was initially meant to be the new host, and not Rey. Because not only that was an actual theory I had pre-TROS, but it would make a shit ton more sense than having Rey be the host – not to mention it’d be the ultimate revenge against Anakin (and if you want to get REAL yucky, he may have planned to have Rey be his new consort, but I’ll spare you more speculation about that aspect). But nah, I guess.

The most damning thing in all this is that there’s no difference in Ben’s overall behavior and actions AFTER Snoke has been killed, when it’s clear Snoke was the biggest influence on him. Saying that Palpatine just kept messing with him makes no sense because with Snoke dead, any voice Ben would still hear would make him go “NOPE” and do exactly the opposite of what said voice tells him to do.

Like, for real, with Snoke dead, unless he’s REALLY stupid (I mean… Ben is reckless, but not stupid), why would Ben do anything a now Random Voice would tell him to do?

The thing is, there have been hints in previous material that Ben isn’t exactly 110% on board with what the First Order does. He’s clearly against blowing up planets, he snarks about how Stormtroopers should be clones instead – which could just be a throwaway snarky line, but considering Ben’s past… I can see him not being too fuzzy about the Stormtrooper program. Like, I’m not saying he’d start a Galactic Free Donut Day, but there would be a change. It wouldn’t be Business as Usual – especially that Ben wasn’t that young (23) when he joined Snoke, and it’s a little hard to go from “My uncle tried to kill me in my sleep and I’m going towards the one figure I think can protect me” to “Blowing up planets and enslaving people is the way to go”. It would have worked if Ben had been brainwashed from his teens, but not so much as an adult – hence you need a little more nuance with Supreme Leader Kylo Ren.

Oh yeah, and the Knights of Ren? They’re just there to look cool. “But they kidnapped Chewie!” Yeah, what was the fucking point of them kidnapping Chewie apart from giving a reason for the Beautiful Friendship Gang to get on the Star Destroyer and give us fake suspense because we all know how it’s gonna end, just end my suffering already. Also, NO INTERRACTION WITH BEN? DID YA FORGET CHEWIE IS LIKE, HIS UNCLE? DID YALL FORGET BEN WAS PART OF YOUR FAMILY OR…

Seriously, that sequence on Pasaana where they’re just standing there on top of a fucking mountain? I called that part the Backdesert Boys. That tells ya how much I hated it.

Oh yeah, and they’re fighting fodder for Benny Boy in the end, because of course they were Palps’ lackeys all along, can’t think of anything else that’s more imaginative.

So what could they possibly add to Ben’s arc, that would explain so much, like how Ben finds Palpatine, or how he’s always one step ahead from the Beautiful Friendship Gang in their Wild Goose Chase no one fucking cares about?

This is where I got into speculation/conspiracy theory territory. Brace yourselves. 

*

So, the film has Lando reveal that he and Luke “knew” about Palps being around thanks to snooping around… except that makes no bloody sense. Lando was never involved in a Force plot of any kind, and he was never that close to Luke anyway. I mean, Lando’s a nice guy and all, but he’s not really besties with Luke – he’s Han’s friend.

So that research should have taken place either before Ben joined Luke at Jedi Camp, either after. Then again, before would make no sense, because why would Luke leave that critical of a search on the ice for 10 to 15 years? The only place where I can place it in time, where it would make logical sense… would be when Ben was around, and it’d make WAY more sense to have him be Luke’s sidekick in that search.

It would have totally explained why Luke freaked the fuck out reading Ben’s mind, because only Palpatine can give her that severe of a PTSD-like reaction. It would have totally explained why Ben would run to Snoke, grooming and desperation set aside, under the promise that they’d associate to defeat Palps, because if you ignore the plot hole extravaganza of TROS, you’d bet Snoke wouldn’t want Palps anywhere near his throne – mainly because Snoke is a wannabe Palpatine who targeted Ben to get his own Vader. It would have totally explained why Ben thought becoming Supreme Leader is a good idea – even if it’s morally wrong, it makes logical sense. It would have totally explained why Kylo was collecting Sith artefacts in the year gap while keeping in mind he made his distaste for the Sith clear in TLJ. It would have totally provided the audience (and Rey) a good reason to forgive Ben, because even if he had godawful methods, he wanted to do the right thing and save the galaxy from the person who came this close to destroying them, as well as his family. That would have provided for him the means to realize that he cannot defeat Palpatine using Palpatine’s means – as Rose said, he’ll win by saving what he loves, and not destroying what he hates. That would have made Rey the glitch in the matrix, who must join forces with Ben because without her, he would have been doomed despite his best efforts.

And before you tell me that would have been unnecessary… let me put it to you this way. Ben keeps saying it's too late, and if it was just that, it could be interpreted as him thinking he went too far to come back. But he also adds that he has "something to do", and I'm here waving my arms like "WHAT? WHY? FUCK, YOU DIDN'T EVEN KILL YOUR FELLOW STUDENTS!!! THEY'RE NOT EVEN BOTHERED TO SAY THAT IN THE ACTUAL FILM!!!"

Hence why my theory is the simplest way to just tie it all neatly together, without retconning anything. There.

IT WOULD HAVE BEEN SUPER SIMPLE TO DO. Except that, as I mentioned earlier, they mutilated Ben’s arc, and left him to play the part of Darth Exposition, until the very end, when they have Ben save what he loves… but even then, I can’t even appreciate that either, because it happens in a way that makes EVERYONE look horrible, while Ben is, from a storytelling perspective, a saint… a saint everyone ultimately forgot about.

[spongebob-connoisseur]

honestly parents who didn’t let their kids watch spongebob were either karens (not the computer though), upper middle class white families who expect too much from their 7 year old to be “smart” and yeah that’s usually what i got from my dominantly white catholic school lol

Yeah that's a good way to describe them. They're either Karens, adults who get mad when things aren't personally catered to them and get so intensely angry seeing their kids enjoy things like a cartoon that they personally may not care for.

Or like my aunt and those upper middle class white predominately christian people who expect too much from their children and essentially rob them of their childhood, thinking they'll be Einstein by teaching them to stress over test scores and stuff at the age of 6.

My aunt is like this. She isn't white but she tries so hard to fit in with them. One of those people who meticulously obsess over things like that and trying to have her family as Facebook picture perfect and pointless things and restricting fun stuff because they think it'll make their kids dumb somehow. She is so fake, so mean and manipulative.

I also have a friend who was raised like that too and jeez the stuff her parents did to her still shock me.

These things are the reason why I don't believe in ""child geniuses"" when they come from upper middle class white families. Their parents have the resources and time to grill all the happiness out of a child so they can show them off like an award winning puppy. They have the money and time to get their successes handed to them. I knew plenty of smart kids growing up from poorer working class families who tried their best with what little resources they have. They should have been considered child geniuses but they weren't born as fortunate as them. But they still worked harder then those kids ever have.

Then there is flat out Homophobes who are scared being happy and expressing yourself will make you a sinful gay™ which is so strange. I remember in 3rd grade, I had a friend who once said she wasn't allowed to watch spongebob and I didn't really understand the reason why. Yeah my parents we're strict with the shows I watched but spongebob never did anything on their list of what they considered inappropriate for a kids show. Yeah now I get what she meant. But also there were a lot of signs her parents were abusing her too but I just didn't really recognize besides things I thought were slightly weird.

You know I remember when I was younger, I have a medical condition so I had to go to a children's hospital for appointments a lot as a kid. It was always so long and so boring in the waiting room.

To the least they had a tv you could watch cartoons on. Usually because the activity table was full and you usually had to wait your turn. One time a lady asked for the channel to be changed to the news and she said "cartoons rot your brain". This is a CHILDREN'S HOSPITAL. can't you let some kids who are in PAIN enjoy some cartoons? My dad asked "you aren't upset about that are you?" And I had an overwhelming fear of most adult figures anyways so I didn't want to say anything to make them feel less of me. It was just easier to say I'm fine and mind my own business. Then she goes on talking about how cartoons are just mindless and pointless to my dad like it was a fun silly conversation. How its a pointless distraction. It might have been a pointless distraction but it was at least something when you have nothing to do and awaiting an appointment that is discussing about your condition and that you'll probably need surgery.

Can you not let kids enjoy things??

Some adults feel so entitled sometimes. I didn't get it as a kid besides "adults are strange" but now being one, I really see how weird and fucked up they can be over something so trivial.

[winterfrostlovetriangle]

Hi, I'm sorry, right now I'm very angry and sad because I haven't slept for like 26 hours and I can't sleep for the next 4 hours sooooo May I request a loki or tom x reader where she is VERY pissed off because of lack of sleep and they end up fighting but then Loki/Tom understands that she only needs cuddles and some good sleep? (sorry if there are some grammatical errors but, plz understand me,, English is not my native lenguage + I really need to sleep)

Hi! First of all, I hope you have been able to get some sleep! As one who also struggles to sleep, please take care of yourself. Secondly, I am SO sorry this is late. I have been super busy. I hope you enjoy!

Pairing: Tom Hiddleston x reader

Masterlist

Cuddles

Tom was sitting on his bed reading a book, enjoying his night. He would be happier if his girlfriend, Y/N, was with him but you were working late again. The hospital was very demanding recently, and you hadn’t been home for almost three days straight. He sighed, put his book aside, and scrubbed his hands over his face. It was late and you should have been home two hours ago. He missed you terribly! He didn’t like your spot being empty. Yawning, he stood up and walked to the bathroom to get ready for bed. 

Tom heard the door open and smiled, but frowned quickly when he heard it shut. 

SLAM!

“Oh dear,” he mutters. He cringes as he hears things being banged about in the living room and kitchen. Tom rushes out of the bedroom to find out what is wrong and comfort you if necessary. 

“Y/N,” he called. Tom’s voice is drowned out by more banging. What is she looking for?

“Y/N! Love, what are you doing?” he asked louder making his way over to the kitchen.

“Think you could be of some use?” you huffed. Tom raised his eyebrows.

“As soon as you tell what you are looking for, yes.”

You glared at him and rolled your eyes, continuing your search. You opened every cupboard in the kitchen only to slam it shut a few seconds later. Glancing at Tom, you saw shock and concern written all over his face. You narrowed your eyes and moved on to the next cabinet.

“You already looked in that one.” Tom’s voice drifted over to you.

“And your point is?”

Tom yanked you to face him. “Stop, just tell me what you are looking for and I will get it.” He kissed the top of your head before pulling back to look you in the face.

All you saw in his eyes was pity and concern. You felt a little guilty, but you were far too upset to stop now.

“Why? You don’t think I can do it on my own? That I am some lowly damsel in distress?” you snapped.

Tom took a breath, “No, because your behavior is concerning. I want to know what is bothering you, Y/N.”

“Nothing, I’m fine. You wouldn’t understand anyway.”

“Try me,” Tom said.

“I just want food. I need a pan.”

“Y/N, I told you there would be food in the fridge for you so you wouldn’t have to cook.” Tom stood in front of you trying to calm you down. 

Comfort was the last thing you wanted right now, you were too worked up. You turned away and started cleaning the kitchen, you needed to keep your hands busy. You sighed heavily, frustrated. You felt Tom watching you again.

“You know, it would be nice if you helped out every once in a while,” you grumbled. “You’re always away galavanting at parties and ceremonies, only to lay around all day and contribute nothing to this household. I work my butt off for days at a time, and then I have to come home and take care of you and your mess. And I’m sick of it!” You were boiling and didn’t care anymore. You couldn’t keep your emotions in check and took them out on the first person you saw.

Tom had an unreadable expression on his face. “Forgive me,” he said quietly. “I didn’t realize I was such a burden.”

“Ugh!” Stop apologizing,” you yelled. Would you stop being such a bloody gentleman for one minute?”  “You’re always so nice and it is so annoying!” 

“Fine, you want me to stop being nice?” Tom asked. “Then here goes. My so-called galavanting is my livelihood. I love acting, but I hate going to parties, award shows, and being away for months at a time! I hate being the center of attention, but I do it for my fans. I talk about you all the time in interviews and said parties, but you don’t know that because you never come, you are always working too,” he growled. “So don’t you DARE lecture me on how much I’m away!  I haven’t complained about you working, have I?” His jaw clenched. “I miss you so much, but I don’t say anything because I know it would just stress you out even more. And as for not doing anything around here - I make sure the flat is spotless when you come home so that you can relax and de-stress. I clean the house on my days off, I cook, and pay the bills so we can live here.”

You gave no response, but stared at the carpet, no longer able to hold his gaze.

“You know what? This is pointless.” Tom pinched the bridge of his nose. “I am going to stay at Ben’s tonight. I need to stop before I say something I really will regret.” Tom stood still for a moment hoping you would say something. He shook his head, raking his fingers through his ginger locks and walked to the bedroom. Leaning against the inside of the door, he closed his eyes. He felt awful for what he’d said and how he yelled. He hated yelling, especially at you. Tom knew he shouldn’t have let you get him riled up. He knew you were probably exhausted and just needed to let off some steam. Sighing, he thought about what he could do to make you feel better. He smiled as he remembered the one thing you loved to do to relax, and set to work.

After Tom slammed the bedroom door, you sank down on the couch. The realization of what just happened hit you and you felt like trash. You had never once lashed out at Tom like that before. You had your spats, but nothing close to this. You were exhausted and wanted to sleep for a week, work was terrible and today you almost quit. Lost in thought, you didn’t hear your boyfriend call you. Tom stood in front of you, taking in your appearance. You looked haggard and pale. He knelt down and placed one hand on your thigh and the other hand on your cheek. 

“Love? Please look at me.”

You shook your head, but Tom crooked a finger under your chin so he could look you in the eyes.

“I’m sorry love. I shouldn’t have gotten so upset with you. And I didn’t mean to make it seem like I do all of the housework. You do a lot,” he apologizes. Tears welling in his eyes. “I hate you being angry with me. Please forgive me?”

“Oh Tom, you have nothing to be sorry for,” you began “It was my fault. I was so angry and instead of just talking with you, I blew up in your face.”

“Y/N” 

“Please let me finish, babe,” you shushed him. He nodded and waited for you to continue. “I am SO sorry. I couldn’t hold it in anymore. It wasn’t you, honest. I-I’m just so tired. Beyond exhausted, actually.“ You tried to blink back tears, but it was too late. “I…”

Tom pulled you close as you sobbed on his chest. 

“It’s alright, Y/N. Let it out. I’m right here, love,” he soothed. 

He rubbed your back soothingly and whispered sweet things in your ear. Not sure how long you sobbed, you slowly started feeling better. You put your hands around Tom’s waist and hugged him tightly, your way of a silent thanks. He smiled and kissed your temple.

You pulled away. “Will you forgive me, Tom? I acted horribly and I am so sorry.” 

He cupped your cheek and used the pad of his thumb to wipe away a few stray tears. “Of course, darling. But on one condition. You talk with me next time you are angry and we’ll work through it.” 

You nodded and gave him a tired smile. 

“Good,” he said before pecking the tip of your nose causing you to giggle. “I have a surprise for you. Let’s go to our room.”

You looked up at him curiously. 

Tom picked you up bridal style and carried you to the bedroom. You snuggled into him, your head on his chest. You noticed his heartbeat picked up a little. Tom stopped just inside the doorway and gently tapped your side. Opening your eyes you gasped. There were candles all over the room; you didn’t know you owned so many. The smell of vanilla and lavender wafted through the air. Tom knew you so well.

“Tom, it’s beautiful! But I don’t deserve any special treatment.”

He walked you to the bed and placed you on your side. “Ah, my little dove, that is where you are wrong,” he chuckled. “You do. You are exhausted and in need of some cuddles.” Tom kissed your cheek before climbing over you to sit down. You giggled at his antics, knowing full well he was trying to get you to laugh. 

He sat down pulled you close to him. You instantly melted into him, molding your bodies to become one. You tangled your feet in his until every part of you was touching. You were beginning to relax. The calming effect of the candles and the feeling of the man you loved wrapped around you. You were home. It wasn’t the building that made it home, it was being in Tom’s arms that made you feel safe, warm, and loved. No matter how cruel and dark the world got, Tom would always be there for you.

“Thank you, Tom. I love you.”

Tom kissed your head. “I love you too, darling,” he whispered as you finally fell into a deep, dreamless sleep.

Thank you to my editor, @lokiodinsonking!

[miraculouscontent]

“favorite salt blogger” eXcUse yOu

But yes, I am absolutely up for another Alya roast.

[All’s Fair in Love and Lore]

First things first, I want to reiterate something I brought up a long time ago (back when I talked about “Mayura”), which is my relationship with lore and how it affects my opinion of an episode.

I see lore as a seasoning, not as a main course, so it’s rather difficult to get me riled up over details about lore. I mean, a lot of people complained about Mayura’s power, for example, but I was not one of those people. The core of my critique and analysis lie in character interactions and plot details, not lore. If the lore is good, great, but if it’s lackluster/bad, I’m not as likely to hammer away at it compared to say, someone like Alya (we’ll get to her in a moment, I promise).

Anyway, I’m gonna be honest in saying that I wasn’t expecting Fu’s foe to be a sentimonster of his own creation. I mean, we’d known for a long time that the destruction of the temple was caused by something that Fu did, but we didn’t know what until now.

As for the reasoning itself, I’m mostly on board because Fu was like, a dumb teenager who didn’t even want to be a guardian, so the fact that it was a silly mistake makes sense to me. My biggest gripe is honestly just that they didn’t clarify how Fu dropped his staff and then couldn’t go after it. Is it going to be revealed after all this time that the man can’t swim?

(that problem might’ve been solved had the flashbacks shown less and been more vague visually; same applies to him talking about losing the grimoire and peacock+butterfly)

I’m aware that a lot of people thought that there’d be more build-up/tension from Fu making a mistake that literally destroyed a whole temple, and I think the reason for that is that we, as an audience, weren’t told that it was such a small mistake. When we see the temple being destroyed and Fu looking on with regret, it makes the situation seem really big and important, like Fu trusted someone he shouldn’t have and that someone was a big bad of some kind.

I can’t blame people for being disappointed, but considering that the temple and all its residents were brought back in the end, I’m glad it was just a foolish mistake made by a salty hungry teen that could simply be reversed, because Fu didn’t deserve to live his entire life feeling guilty over it. Like, yeah, there are some obvious things that should probably be addressed (i.e: the fact that these residents have been gone for almost 200 years) but eh, details, I don’t really care that much.

Though, I guess we know why Wang “bicycle away from all problems” Fu isn’t that great as a guardian now; he’s had a few years of training at best. It doesn’t excuse everything he did and I wish it was more of a plot point but still.

Plus, him being like, “yeah, forget how the actual guardians tried to teach me because clearly that did nothing for me mentally,” was very amusing to me and also, yeah, I don’t think that starving teens for 24 hours who don’t even want this darn job is a great idea either.

That said, I do feel like this episode kind of has the “Ladybug” problem where they’re focusing on two characters at once, and in both “Ladybug” (an episode that should be Marinette-centric) and “Feast” (an episode that should be Fu-centric), that second character is Nathalie/Mayura. I don’t technically have an issue with Nathalie getting focus in a narrative sense (though, am I the only one who thinks that the foreshadowing in “Ladybug” over Emilie using the peacock is pointless now? I felt like Adrien saying “the same thing happened to my mom” is enough.), but when Fu already doesn’t get a lot of focus outside of plot-centric episodes (technically Marinette doesn’t either but she has screen time), I feel bad for the guy. I think Nathalie’s plot points could’ve been used better in an episode like “Miraculer” since Chloe already gets more than enough focus.

Granted, if this episode was a two-parter, I would’ve been all for Nathalie getting focus because this episode is about a sentimonster, so it makes sense, but I don’t think the episode was able to touch on both topics in full in the time it had, and it’s just weird in general that this season is a downgrade from Season 2 in that respect, where Season 2 had multiple two-parters (one of them technically being a three-parter) whereas Season 3 only has one two-parter. I believe I’ve talked about it before, but now it’s two episodes that could’ve been worthy of being two-parters (three if counting “Miraculer” but I was reaching on that one), so it’s even more noticeable than before.

What I do like about the episode is the Marinette and Fu interactions along with Marinette and Adrien being heroic civilians. It was also interesting to see Wayzz lecturing Fu about how Fu was making a mistake because it’s nice seeing Wayzz have more input on the matter.

Also, Plagg playing piano with Adrien was good. I guess Sadrien was inevitable since Nathalie’s sick but thank goodness it’s brief.

...you know what I didn’t like though?

[Abandon Hope, Alya Who Enter Here]

Gosh darn--Alya, I swear, I leave you alone for one episode (for the most part) and I guess you didn’t like that or something because DANG.

Now, look, I totally get Alya being in pursuit of more information. In fact, I'd be in full support if we got to see more of Alya coming up with in-depth theories, whether they're true or not.

The problem is that Alya has no tact when doing so, and this brings me all the way back to "Oblivio" when I rambled about the fact that Alya took that photo and posted it online without Ladybug's permission, despite Ladybug having trusted her, given her an interview, and gave her a miraculous on multiple occasions.

And I do not believe for one second that Alya ever gave up on figuring out Ladybug's identity here. She clearly gets nervous when Marinette calls her out for it, and I don't see "figuring out Hawk Moth's identity" as her only goal.

Her actions here are particularly insulting because of the severity in what she's doing. Either Alya believes that her theory isn't accurate and that's why it's okay to post it, or she's just that reckless in what she's doing.

Considering her track record, I'm inclined to go with the latter.

Furthermore, Alya explaining all of these things when she already has a video about it on her blog is dumb for two reasons. One is that she's presuming that neither Marinette nor Alix follow her blog (at the very least, she presumed that Marinette did back in "Dark Cupid"), and two, she put her blog first and her friends second when prioritizing who should know. It just seems superfluous for her to tell her friends this information when she's already made a video about it (at least run it by them for a quality check first jfjisoshfhf).

And speaking of prioritizing who should know, Ladybug should know and Alya doesn’t even run it by her first either. Presuming that “The Mime” happened by now (basically impossible for it to have not), Marinette has already given Alya an interview with Ladybug, so Marinette should be the first one that Alya goes to so she can be like, “Hey, can you get a hold of Ladybug again so I can ask if this is accurate/helpful?”

I dread what would’ve happened had Alya gotten her hands on the grimoire somehow. Every single page would’ve been posted to the Ladyblog without a single thought and the mere idea of that is horrifying.

The fact that Alya mentions Hawk Moth yet doesn’t even realize the gravity of what she’s doing is ridiculous, and going further to have Marinette apologize to Fu for giving Alya the fox miraculous but not having it be directly addressed (i.e: not having Ladybug visit Alya to talk about privacy; again, having this be a two-parter would’ve been nice) while Alya clearly learns nothing by the end of the episode is just--

it’s dumb. Alya wouldn’t even have needed to get a talking to by Ladybug anyway if the episode had just had Alya see the crushed/missing statue at the museum and made the connection that, “oh, I posted a video about this statue and now the statue is gone and a terrible monster hungry for miraculouses with that same symbol on its head showed up not too long after HMMMMMMM.” The episode claims that Alya is a great journalist only to then not have her connect the dots because... like, tunnel vision, I guess???

And that wouldn’t be a problem if it were just addressed, but instead, now we have yet another female character who has their hero status brought into question, leaving Ladybug as the only female who is undoubtedly trustworthy (not counting Alix, the eventual bunny holder).

It’s so baffling to me that the episode goes out of its way to bring up the issue of what Alya’s doing and why it’s dangerous, only to then not discuss it further. I don’t know if the episode went through rewrites that ended with the scene cut out, but that scene would’ve been important unlike... say, Alya getting on Marinette’s case for staring at Adrien (and the award for the most irrelevant scene in this episode goes to--).

I mean, despite what I said about the episode itself and it needing more time in general, the episode can’t spend time on pointing out that Alya has made a mistake only to then not take the time to address it and instead show that Alya hasn’t learned anything.

Thus, given “Reflekdoll” and now this, we see that even if Alya is clearly at fault and/or needs to learn a lesson, regardless of whether the writers are aware of it/point it out or not, nothing will come of it.

*sigh*

[arinaco]

Keith and Shiro: The Hero’s Journey

Translated and edited by @Nadezhda932 

Once I was asked if I would write a meta about Keith or Shiro, and then I refused, because their story at that moment seemed to me simple and clear. But since then, a certain amount of nuance has accumulated that could be written about, so I decided to write a meta.

Warning – the topic of Sheith won’t be raised. All the ships are respected here, but in order to avoid any controversy, in this meta the relationship between Shiro and Keith will be considered exclusively in the context that was declared by the series itself, where Shiro became like an older brother for Keith.

Shiro and Keith’s storylines are closely related, so it’s pointless to look at them separately. Moreover, if Keith’s story is in many ways the standard story of a teenager growing up, then Shiro’s story touches on a completely different – not childish – question.

And I’ll start with the most scandalous – if I may say so – part of Shiro’s storyline. His flashbacks in S7. In the interviews, EPs said they planned to introduce these flashbacks much earlier, but many didn’t believe them. And I’ll start with them because they have an important storyline for Shiro in S8, and most likely one of the reasons why Shiro’s story arc was practically cut out there.

To answer the question of whether these flashbacks were inserted at the last moment, we need to go right back to the first seasons to remember the strange behavior of Shiro, the weirdness of which passed us by, because at that moment there was no clear explanation.

In S1, Shiro appeared before us as a young strong man, mature and confident in his professionalism. He’s almost 30, and this is the very age when a military man can finally begin to count on some serious shoulder straps and a promotion. And suddenly this young man begins to talk with Keith that he may lead the paladins instead of Shiro. As if he was about to retire and needed someone to replace him, although future successors of people at this age usually command an army of plush toys.

I want you to lead Voltron.

After being wounded, Shiro remembered that he was mortal… and that death was very close to him

Of course, the situation was difficult and there was a constant risk, but only Shiro prepared a successor in advance… as if he was about to die. Why did the young man have so many thoughts about death? And here I’ll ask you to remember the plot of flashbacks from S7. Because it’s only in the flashbacks of S7 where we find out… that Shiro was really going to die.

He was ill. Terminally ill. And he knew that soon the very time would come when he lay down in a hospital bed and would never leave its walls again. Yes, the Galra, who had big plans for their new champion, cured the disease, but Shiro didn’t know about it.

And this can serve as the main proof that yes – the flashbacks were indeed planned initially. And only the creators of the series know why they were introduced to the series so late. And they must be taken into account when we talk about Shiro’s storyline, as well as his relationship with Adam.

So where does Shiro’s journey actually begin? It’s unknown when exactly Shiro found out about his illness. Perhaps already in adulthood, or perhaps he even experienced difficulties when entering the Garrison, because the selection for pilots in terms of health has always been very strict. The main thing is different – how Shiro reacted to his illness. He turned out to be one of those people who decided that if they were destined to burn like a match, then they had to shine so as to eclipse the supernova. The entire closet in his house is filled with commemorative awards and diplomas; he’s called the best pilot of the Garrison in plain text. And that’s why his close friend, Professor Holt, decided to take him to Kerberos – this was a gift before his death. At that time, this would probably have been the highest achievement for a space pilot. The title of the discoverer of deep space for planet Earth. Gagarin of a new era, who, by the way, also died young – at 34.

Clear your mind. Now imagine your Lion.

At the same time, of course, it should be noted that Shiro as a whole was a selfless person, striving to take care of others. Perhaps it was a way for him to come to terms with impending death – to live for others, forgetting about himself. The presence of the disease made him a person who doesn’t think about his future and believes that his personal problems don’t matter. If he dies soon anyway, what’s the difference?

There was a difference, though not for Shiro himself. Adam is the very best friend of the hero who always remains in the shadows, behind his back. They started as co-pilots, friends and associates. They worked in one team. Pilots often work in pairs to duplicate each other, and Adam was the one to back Shiro on combat missions. And so their photo together was in the same closet where the awards that Shiro had so eagerly sought to receive were located.

And to better understand Adam… how do you think, who in this situation made sure that Shiro took pills on time, followed the regimen and went to the doctors? Despite the fact that Shiro chose the path of absolutely not giving a damn about his life.

I think the answer is obvious.

While Shiro dedicated his life to the stars and serving the community, Adam dedicated his life to caring for Shiro. And from a moral point of view, this is a very difficult role: to take care of an incurable patient, to take him to hospitals, to monitor his condition, to look at disappointing forecasts with despair, but still continue to fight the disease, winning if not a year, then at least a month… Shiro told Keith that he had only a year or two left, but I think Adam could have given more accurate numbers.

And the problem with this situation is that… Shiro didn’t look back. Only forward, only to the stars. And Adam couldn’t help but start wondering how much Shiro appreciated his efforts. Shiro had a couple of years of normal life left, and Adam wanted them to spend these years together, but then a dangerous, though truly starry peak appeared on the horizon, and of course, Shiro decided to conquer it, even though the high command spoke out against it…

But this is more than a mission, this is your life at stake.

And… Adam just couldn’t stand it. All these years he obediently covered his back, but now Shiro was going on a solo mission, and if something happened, Adam wouldn’t even have anything to bury. So he just left. Broken. It’s very hard to love and care for someone if you don’t feel the same in return.

Takashi, how important am I to you?

How did Shiro feel about this? Perhaps, at that particular moment, he even thought that it would be better this way, because Adam one way or another would have to continue to live without him. Being a selfless person, he probably wanted Adam to be happy after his death, and in order to move on, the dead must be left in the past.

I’m going on a mission.

It didn’t even occur to him that Adam would fulfill his promise in the most literal sense. And that the very question «How important am I to you?» would remain unanswered.

This was the starting point of his journey. The journey of a person who, due to illness, began to regard his life and problems as something insignificant. A person who’s used to devaluing his personal needs and health. And it’s the question of depreciation that runs like a red thread throughout his entire storyline.

Only… it’s easy to devalue your health and feelings when you’re generally a happy person. Maybe Shiro even wanted to die before becoming a helpless vegetable. Better to die a hero than live bedridden. But then the Galra appeared in his life – the very variable that he couldn’t take into account. And uninvited guests «rewarded» him not only with good health, but also with strong PTSD. After all, Shiro, like all other paladins, including Allura, grew up without war. He didn’t know the war. The difficult tasks that Shiro had to solve in space came from an aggressive environment, not from aggressive neighbors. The last war on Earth took place long before his birth.

And Shiro was really shocked when he met the Galra. «We’re unarmed, what are you doing?» – quite a classic reaction of a person who lived in a prosperous, peaceful society. There were thousands of them – boys who, from their usual peaceful environment, unexpectedly went to war, and then returned as crippled combatants. And PTSD in Shiro’s situation is a tragic, but quite natural development of events.

If you open some serious scientific text on PTSD (and I found one, not even a very old one – 2015 edition), then it’ll be written there that one of the main problems of sufferers of PTSD is that they don’t perceive symptoms as one whole and just don’t understand that they need help. And a man like Shiro thought that amnesia, flashbacks and nightmares were his own problem, which shouldn’t prevent him from playing the important role of leader and nanny of other paladins. No, under favorable conditions, PTSD can really go away on its own – new emotions and positive experience repeatedly assure a person that now everything will be fine, and after a certain time his psyche relaxes. But Shiro didn’t have such conditions. He sharply turned out to be the most important and eldest in the company of children, and his task was not to go into space to conduct experiments, but to stop the aggression of a huge empire. And his PTSD from the acute phase just turned into a chronic one.

And here we need to briefly recall how PTSD affects a person. PTSD is a state when tragedy doesn’t let go, when a person continues to cycle through events, and as a result begins to fear their repetition. And he spends all his efforts to prevent this from happening. The simplest case: I was bitten by a dog – so I’ll avoid all dogs. By keeping my distance, I’ll be safe.

And all of Shiro’s changes – his desire to control the situation, his bitterness throughout the series – it all grows out of this. And that’s not even considering the influence of Haggar. Ever wonder why the clone had the memory of the real Shiro? Because Haggar thrust her fingers into Shiro’s mind and didn’t want to let go. As she appropriated the souls of the old paladins, so she did with Shiro, and then used him to protect herself from the White Lion. Only in S7 Allura managed to rid Shiro of the last fragments of this influence.

I won’t listen to you!

Are you saying this to Sendak or to your memory?

Fortunately, Keith was next to Shiro. At the time of their first acquaintance, Keith was still a child whom Shiro took into care. Shiro saw in him that very problematic teen who needed support, and naturally he couldn’t pass by. Under his leadership, Keith became more balanced and was able to reveal his pilot talent. Shiro saw potential in him and wanted to help Keith channel his energies in a positive direction.

Keith, being a lonely child and an orphan, saw Shiro as his only close person and naturally couldn’t agree that Shiro’s health and well-being were something unimportant and unnecessary. He was ready to tear his veins in order to save the only semblance of a family that he had, and thus repeatedly proved to Shiro that yes, Shiro was important, that yes, he must live, because his life was valuable even without victories and awards. Keith literally forced Shiro to accept help, forced him to put up with the fact that Shiro couldn’t always control the situation. Keith helped Shiro learn to rely on others again.

And that’s why they win Sendak together. Sendak has been Shiro’s personal enemy since the first episode, but the truth is, alas, that Sendak and Shiro are fighters of different weight classes. Sendak is more than ten thousand years old, he’s a Galra from the days of old Daibazaal, he was trained personally by Zarkon. There were only three fighters of this level in the universe at that time, and, unfortunately, Shiro wasn’t included in this three. And Lotor wasn’t allowed to kill Sendak, otherwise it would have been a shame that Lotor had killed all the main enemies of the paladins.

Shiro objectively couldn’t defeat Sendak alone. And that’s why Shiro killed Sendak together with Keith – Shiro accepted his help and said not «How many times will you save me again?», but a simple «Thank you».

But then… after S7 everything goes downhill. And scraps of Shiro’s story arc stick out like torn threads. And this applies to two aspects:

Shiro’s personal life;

his being a paladin;

First, I’ll tell you about him as a paladin. Despite the fact that Shiro is no longer a Black Paladin, the last episodes of S8 clearly show us that he’s still a paladin. His eyes also shine along with everyone else, and… against a WHITE background. And the background at that moment was the color of the paladin’s Lion.

Because Shiro became a White Paladin, although this has never been officially confirmed. Most likely, this moment fell under the carving knife along with many other cut scenes. But we still can trace the general outline of this story arc.

And here we need to remember the Alteans and their culture. The Alteans had a real cult of sacrifice, most likely as a consequence of the potential danger of the alchemists (say hello to Honerva). Therefore, the test on Oriande isn’t a check on whether you’re good or bad, but a check on the conformity of belonging to the Altean culture.

Stage 1 is a pass from Honerva’s storage. Perhaps this pass was given to every alchemist without any explanation of how to use it. The alchemist had to guess it, but Honerva for some reason couldn’t. And only an Altean could get such a pass.

Stage 2 is checking basic knowledge. In the space age, the ability to use the Teludav was most likely a must-have for any alchemist.

Stage 3 is the most important. White Lion, testing not your moral qualities, but your belonging to the culture of the Alteans. Understanding the cult of sacrifice. That’s why Lotor didn’t pass this stage – his upbringing is different. A true Galra must not die for his homeland, he must make his enemies die for their own.

But Shiro, one might say, is the ideal member of this cult. Pass a sea of quintessence through yourself so that Professor Holt can hack the ship? Yes, please, he doesn’t mind. The White Lion appreciated that. More precisely, the White Lion appreciated Shiro even earlier, when Honerva used Shiro’s soul to pass the trial. And Shiro… actually passed the trial of sacrifice in her place. The White Lion saw him and realized that Shiro was really selfless to the extent that a true Altean should be selfless.

And Atlas didn’t transform into a robot because the brilliant Professor Holt was able to build a second Voltron. It happenned because the White Lion came and said to the other Lions: «Hold my beer, now I’ll show you how to save the universe». By sacrificing himself, Shiro initiated himself as a White Paladin, and combined with the Castle’s crystal this allowed him to summon the Lion to the Atlas.

A very important nuance in fact. But it flies past us, forcing us to wonder how a huge bucket of nuts from the backward Earth managed to catch up with the creation of King Alfor.

The loss of the second aspect of Shiro’s storyline was so great that couldn’t be unnoticed. Shiro abruptly lost touch with other paladins, and his behavior became authoritarian and aggressive. As if as soon as Shiro sat in the admiral’s chair, power hit him in the head.

And then at the end of the story, he unexpectedly quits his job and marries a random character. I’m sorry, what?! O_o

For unknown reasons, someone abruptly decided to delete Shiro’s line from the story, due to which the character completely lost the logic of his behavior. And we can only guess what was really there, armed with common sense and a reference book on psychology.

The most obvious line that was cut (of which I’m 90% sure) is the line of Adam’s death. When Shiro learns about Adam’s death in S7, he remembers his name with great anguish. Until then, the thought that Adam might die before him seemed inconceivable to Shiro. And here he was left alone with the very last question, to which he never gave an answer. And when Shiro says that «their deaths won’t be in vain», he speaks first of all about Adam. And he rushes into space «to do good» with thoughts of Adam. Despite the fact that the Galra Empire is no longer there, there’s no one to fight with. Only to catch small associations throughout the universe that do no more harm than ordinary pirates, and in most cases they just try to survive. Shiro in S8 behaves exactly like Allura in S1, who shook her fist and threatened all Galra with revenge in a desire to fulfill the command of her deceased father and save the universe.

Adam…

He never told Adam that he was really important to him, and tried to express these words with his actions. And against the background of this grief, which remained unmourned in the series, the wedding looks weird. He didn’t refuse Kerberos mission for the sake of Adam, but gave up his life’s work for the sake of the first comer.

All Shiro’s experiences, all his pain were simply put under the knife, as if it never existed. As a result, we got a character whose behavior changed dramatically, as if instead of Shiro there’s again another clone.

And if you evaluate the arc from the point of common sense, Shiro should have shared his grief with his friends. With Keith at least. Express it, rather than go through this stress alone. Otherwise, it turns out that Shiro’s entire storyline was just about nothing. So many times Keith saved him, but he still continued to keep all the problems in himself, not telling anyone about them.

It truly feels like the light has gone out in our lives

The rest of the storylines have no real confirmation, except for theories, so I won’t describe them. Moreover, against the background of the main experience mentioned above, they look less significant and practically don’t affect the plot.

The epilogue of Shiro in the original script, most likely, was supposed to be a significant political position, but a peacemaker, not an aggressor. The conduct of diplomatic negotiations between the races, which flashed for a couple of seconds, fits well into this image.

Now let’s talk about Keith. It’s even sadder with the end of his arc, because it’s completely lost. And as a result, instead of normal development, Keith sharply turned into Marty Stu. And I have to admit, probably the Keith’s storyline in S8 is what comes second on my list called «Things That Piss Me Off In This Season». Only Romelle’s storyline pisses me off more than Keith’s one. And the reasons why it pisses me off can be divided into two categories:

Category 1 – Keith as a «good Galra»

Category 2 – Keith as a «great leader»

I don’t like the first one for one simple reason: Keith is not a Galra. Because belonging to a people isn’t determined by a set of genes. Because any nation is primarily a language, culture and history. When an invader wants to demonstrate his power, he forbids the people to speak their native language. And the fact that Keith is very similar to his mom doesn’t make him a Galra. Keith was born on Earth, raised on Earth and is psychologically an Earthling. He’s an Earthling with Galran blood, nothing more, nothing less. And that’s why, when he tells Lahn that he’s also a Galra, Lahn replies something like «You don’t say» with obvious skepticism in his voice. Because the Galra are a people with a very ancient culture and their own special collective psychology, and all this can’t simply be inherited through genes. Through genes, only temperament is inherited, and a certain belonging to culture in a person appears only during upbringing. Moreover, in the series we see an example of the fact that no matter how strong the desire to become a part of another culture is, it doesn’t always help. Who is this example? The answer is simple – Lotor.

Lotor has spent his entire life studying the culture of the Alteans, and he’s nearly ten thousand years old. But at the same time he was born among the Galra, was brought up by the Galra and lived according to the principles of the Galra. As a result, Oriande said goodbye to him. Lotor wanted to be part of the Alteans, but he couldn’t – despite the fact that he’s half Altean. Half the blood didn’t help him in any way.

But for some reason, Keith has suddenly become a real «good Galra» just by the wave of a magic wand. Despite the fact that he never showed interest in the Galran culture, and even among the Blades he remained on his own special wave. He felt at home among the Blades not because he was a Galra, but because Galran society was historically formed to be able to live in close groups and get along with each other. And when Keith went to the Blades, they just took him under their wing, and thereby gave him what he needed then. Therefore, this is why Keith felt that he belonged, not because of some mythical voice of blood.

The second category is worth talking about after analyzing Keith’s storyline.

Keith’s storyline is the Hero’s Journey. Almost a classic version. A young man must leave the comfort zone, perform a feat, receive a reward for this feat, and return home matured after the trials he has endured.

The reward for Keith is finding a family, and his trial is becoming a leader. Now remember his epilogue. Do you remember what happened there?

In the epilogue, Keith never appeared with his family – neither with Shiro, nor with Krolia, nor with Kolivan, but he got a chance to take the imperial throne. The trial was turned into a reward, and Lotor’s generals, almost strangers to him, became his circle of friends. Who, by the way, betrayed Lotor, so Keith should watch his back.

It looks so cute, if you forget that Zethrid has problems with aggression, and Ezor is a hidden sadist…

Just because Keith had to become a leader doesn’t mean he wanted to be. The fact that he has assumed responsibilities doesn’t mean that he has dreamed of fulfilling them all his life. But, in order not to be unfounded, let’s take a closer look at how Keith’s personality changes according to the plot.

The Hero’s Journey of Keith

Stage 1. Everyday World

To understand what his Call to Adventure was, as well as the Unknown World and the Trial, you need to look at where it all started.

After the decision was made to change S8, Keith was compared to Lotor, despite the fact that they’re two completely different people with completely different fates. And if Lotor’s childhood was stable and predetermined (from birth he was in the hands of the governess and from birth he knew that his destiny was to rule the Galra), the situation with Keith turned out to be radically opposite. He knew nothing about his mother, except that she was missing. It was even sadder with his father – he died, leaving behind only a dagger. It’s sadder, because it was the father who embodied for Keith the stability and security that every child needs. And although everyone said that Heath died as a hero, Keith, who ended up in an orphanage, didn’t get any easier from this knowledge. The exact period of his father’s death wasn’t named, but most likely Keith at that moment was at least 6-7 years old, mature enough to remember his parent well.

Keith was by nature a classic introverted child (which, by the way, isn’t a Galran character trait at all) who needs his own corner and wants to be able to be alone in this corner. An introvert prefers that his social circle is limited to a certain list of people, and he’s morally stressed by the constant need to be in society, since he’s simply mentally tired of this.

But, alas, the orphanage isn’t the place where they will give you your own room when you want to be alone. And against the background of a hot temper, this led to the fact that Keith didn’t get along with the children and educators. He desperately wanted to regain the very cozy world where he and a strong loving dad were, but those around him simply couldn’t give it.

Ultimately, this resulted both in the absence of friends, and in the reluctance of educators to spend time on him. After all, they had others – talented, not problematic, excellent pupils with perfect discipline. And without support – especially the support of wise adults – Keith has turned into a kind of a little mouse that wants to sit in a mouse hole, categorically unwilling to protrude into this dangerous unknown world, where everyone can offend him. And if this tiny mouse does get out, it begins to run and grind its teeth on everyone, so that every potential aggressor knows that this mouse, although small, can bite you.

Stage 2. Call to Adventure. The first Mentor appears

Maybe you’ve got what it takes?

At first glance, it may seem that the Blue Lion has become the Call to Adventure for Keith. But in fact, the Unknown World for Keith was not distant space, but life itself. And this Call happened much earlier than the events of the first episode.

Namely, the appearance of Shiro. The very moment when he came to school to tell the children about piloting and offer to play the simulator. The big man saw this very little mouse sitting in the corner and offered him his hand. He offered to show that the world outside the mouse hole isn’t so scary, and even interesting and wonderful.

What did our mouse do in the first moment? That’s right, he bit this hand. Keith perceived Shiro as another potential aggressor and didn’t want to make contact.

But Shiro’s tenacity was beyond measure. He told Keith over and over again that he needed to be bolder. He showed him the spaceship and told him about the astronauts who weren’t afraid to go into the unknown. He jumped off the cliff with him, demonstrating by his example his willingness to step towards this terrible frightening thing called life. And he explained that even such a flight can be controlled if you’re prepared for it in advance.

The mouse bit him on the finger, but he continued to offer his hand, promising to protect and help, to become a guide in the world around him, and under the guidance of Shiro, our tiny animal got out of the hole and began to gradually look around. Keith kept snapping at the people around him, but Shiro’s guardianship helped him start to feel a kind of security and certainty. He got a new father figure in Shiro and began to stabilize mentally.

But this process was cut short in the middle.

The first alarming call was the news about the illness. Keith of course told Shiro that he’s grown up enugh for this kind of news, but just remember how hysterically he spoke about it. The possibility of losing a father figure (for the second time!), guaranteeing stability and security, seemed daunting to Keith. He didn’t want to believe it, he refused to believe it, and by the events of the first season he simply threw this knowledge out of his head as unwanted information.

But then something happened that we already know. The expedition with Shiro disappeared, and the mouse, left without a protector, scaredly bit everyone who was nearby, and at the first cosmic speed rushed back into the hole. Keith quarreled with others and was expelled from the Garrison for deviant behavior, and then returned to his old house, where he once lived with his father. We now know that Heath lived there because he was guarding the Blue Lion, but then Keith simply returned to that one place where he felt comfortable and safe.

2.1 Supernatural Aid

As the saying goes, sometimes a decisive step forward is the result of a good kick from behind. Either the Blue Lion sensed the approach of the Galra, or she was simply bored, but she started sending Keith signals to go to look for the «anomaly» and, in the end, brought all the main characters of the series to her.

And by the will of the magic princess, for a more comfortable confrontation with the world around him, Keith receives a transforming sword, a stylish suit and a mechanical cat with character.

2.2 Refusal of the Call

No, I can’t take it.

Keith refused the Call from the beginning. But. Up to this point, Shiro played the role of the Good Father: he didn’t demand that Keith decide something himself, he stroked his head and persuaded him to trust father’s decisions. He took full responsibility for himself, allowing Keith to remain in the role of a child.

Now, with the arrival of the Galra, everything has changed. Shiro was no longer the same, and the world around him wasn’t the same. Shiro found himself in a situation where he was appointed commander-in-chief in a war against a huge hostile empire, and instead of the army he was given a handful of teenagers. Moreover, Shiro was sincerely convinced that he would soon become incapacitated, and the newly acquired PTSD demanded to keep everything under control. This means that he – Shiro – must take care of everything, including what will happen when he can no longer lead the team.

And in this situation, it turned out that Shiro really knew well only Keith. He knew what Keith could, and he knew Keith was trustworthy. In Shiro’s eyes, there was no longer a child, but a rather grown up guy, and Shiro treated him as an equal. And he began not to persuade Keith to go forward, holding his hand – he began to insist that Keith go and lead the others.

If you become a leader, you’ll have to act wisely.

From that moment, from a Good Father, Shiro began to gradually turn into an Evil Father, who demands that his son pull himself together and grow up. The Evil Father isn’t actually bad, he loves his son, but he believes that it’s time for the boy to stop being afraid of the outside world and become a man.

But Keith wasn’t ready yet. The child has just learned to stand on trembling legs, but here they’re demanding that he not only run forward, but also drag someone along with him.

So Keith began to refuse. To give up not so much the role of a leader as the obligation to take responsibility for himself. From the obligation to become an adult.

But the more the son resists, the angrier the father becomes. Because you can’t hide forever, and you can’t remain a child forever. Sooner or later, a moment may come when a father, out of love for his son, simply throws him out of the nest so that he forcibly learns to fly.

Stage 3. First Threshold. The second Mentor appears

3.1 Threshold Guardians

Trials can only have two outcomes.

First Threshold is the line that the hero needs to pass in order to enter a new unknown world. In Keith’s case, a new, unexplored world of maturity. At this turn, depending on the behavior of the protagonist, he’s met by either the Threshold Guardians or the Belly of a Whale.

What’s the difference? In the first case, the hero meets the Guardians, and they check the hero, whether he’s ready to cross this line. And only after passing their check, the hero receives permission to go further. In the second case, the hero is metaphorically killed, that is, he’s forced to change so that he meets the necessary requirements for entering a new unknown world.

Knowledge or death.

In Keith’s case, the first scenario happened. And Kolivan, accompanied by the Blades, becomes the Guardian at the turn of the new adult life. The one who will later become Keith’s guide through this world.

When the Blades meet Keith, they demand that he return the dagger to them, but Keith refuses. The fact is that for Keith the dagger embodied the very bright past that he desperately wanted to return. The last connection with that wonderful childhood, where he and his loving dad were. And the hope that if he tries, if he’s lucky, he’ll understand what this dagger means, and will know who he is and where he belongs. Where is his home and family.

But the Blades, as Guardians of the threshold of maturity, ask Keith how much he’s willing to give for this last hope. What are his priorities. For a very long time Keith turned away from people, from the whole world, in order to cherish dreams of a bright past in his head. And then he was forced to ask the question: how much he values these dreams. And he had to answer. Give the answer not to them, but to himrself.

Ultimately, between a childhood dream of a family and an adult responsibility to others, Keith chooses the latter. He passes the test of his willingness to begin the journey to maturity, and the Guardians let him through.

But think: what marks the passage of this milestone for Keith?

It’s marked by the battle with Zarkon, in which Shiro is killed and merged with the Black Lion.

Moreover, after these events, Shiro, in the person of Kuron, finally turns into the Evil Father. He simply refuses to lead Keith by the hande. And he inherits the Black Lion and the title of the Black Paladin.

Remember my words about throwing a chick out of the nest?

This is exactly what Shiro did. By becoming one with the Black Lion, he forcibly made Keith the Black Paladin.

Stage 4. Road of Trials

You wanted me to lead Voltron? This is the kind of leader I am.

It’s difficult to say how correct this decision was. Rather, Shiro simply didn’t see other options, since the Black Lion itself was made for an adult, responsible leader, and such ones don’t lie on the road.

And Keith, who was left with no choice, began his journey. On his trembling legs, the child began to walk forward, constantly falling and dropping the rest of the children following him. Naturally, he wasn’t happy about this. He constantly looked back, looking for thefsther figure and hoping to take him by the hand again. But dad saw was no longer a kid, but an adult and wasn’t going to help at all.

However, such a harsh decision did bear fruit. Other kids helped the main character; they walked tightly holding each other’s hands, and Keith began to feel grateful for the support and responsibility for the fact that when he falls, everyone else falls.

But then comes the second most important event in Keith’s life.

4.1 Test challenge & prepare hero

Shiro: Here’s the plan. Keith: Okay, team, we need to…

A sure sign: two housewives in the kitchen will lead to broken plates.

To accurately understand the meaning of this stage, I’ll briefly describe this stage in understandable language: this is the moment when the main character tries to defeat the main boss of the game for the first time. The main boss kicks him, but doesn’t kill, and the main character retreats, realizing that his level is too low.

And yes, the main boss of Keith’s game is the Evil Father in the person of Kuron. Kind dad has become a terrible dragon, and the boy must figure out what to do with it.

Kuron-Shiro returns. He returns, and the paladins receive not one, but two Black Paladins at once, which entails the need to establish a hierarchy. Because two drivers can’t sit behind the wheel at once – sooner or later a conflict will begin.

And on the one hand, Kuron actively advocates for Keith to be in command, and on the other hand, out of habit, gives instructions himself. And Keith needs to enter into some kind of rivalry in order to arrange roles and finally establish himself as a leader.

The boy has just begun to walk firmly, and dad is already offering to run a hundred meters for a bet.

And what does Keith do in this situation? He runs away He runs away to the Blades because he feels completely unprepared for such a challenge.

There’s only one question: why to the Blades? At first glance, the answer seems obvious: Keith learned that he was half Galra, saw his own kind in the Blades and decided to go to them. This is exactly what the paladins thought, and therefore they forgave Keith for such a decision.

In reality, the main motivating reason wasn’t race, but the behavior of the Blades in relation to Keith. More precisely – Kolivan’s behavior.

You broke protocol.

Statement of fact without any punishment.

If Shiro saw Keith as an adult and treated him like an adult, then for Kolivan – from the height of his past centuries – Keith was still a child. Colivan didn’t read him speeches about the need to become a leader and didn’t arrange competitions, and therefore, faced with an insurmountable obstacle, Keith simply fled under his wing.

And he got in Kolivan exactly the one he needed all these long years. Kolivan saw how the boy was unstable on his feet, took his hand and led him. He didn’t require Keith to walk on his own, but didn’t interfere with his attempts to do so. And he didn’t threaten with this terrible word «responsibility», but only reminded that every action has consequences, that if Keith falls in his desire to rush forward without looking, it will hurt.

You didn’t consider that something could have happenned to you.

Kolivan didn’t go easy on him, because such behavior was contrary to the Galran culture based on survival. But under his leadership, Keith became calmer, more concentrated and more confident in himself. He was in the position of an ordinary soldier, and therefore he wasn’t required to make decisions. On the other hand, Kolivan kept him nearby and from his example Keith learned what it means to be a leader.

Shiro: You must defeat the dragon! Keith: o_o Dragon called Life: You can’t defeat me, hero! Keith: O_O Kolivan: Dayak’s Galran Recreational School offers dragon-fighting training services Keith: Six months, please.

The evil Shiro demanded that Keith go ahead and lead everyone. Kolivan the mentor showed Keith how to do it.

The long-lost father returned home, and the child, having ceased to fear for his future, finally regained his balance. He began to stand harder on his feet and walk harder, because he felt that now he wouldn’t fall.

Again, speaking in gaming language, up to this point, Keith was offered to level up in locations with enemies above his level. It went slowly, the enemies were killed badly, and they could also kill Keith himself, and then he would lose experience and go back. Now he found a location with enemies of his level, and the process went quickly, fervently and without unnecessary risk.

Stage 5. Nadir/Abyss

So, Keith has leveled up and is ready to face his dragon again. What happens to him when he comes close to the moment X?

5.1 Meeting with the Goddess

The Goddess embodies for the Hero the personification of unconditional love, as the beginning of life. And meeting with her allows the protagonist to learn this aspect and understand that life is not only a series of suffering.

And here I can’t help but remember that initially a pairing with Acxa was planned for Keith, but then, to the great joy of some of the fans, this pairing was cut out. Since I hate it when the screenwriters cut a ready-made script, I can’t say that I’m satisfied with this fact, but at the same time I can’t but admit that this pairing practically didn’t play any role for Keith’s storyline. In Keith’s storyline, pairing isn’t at all important or even needed, because an abandoned child needs a completely different manifestation of love.

And his mother becomes his Goddess, the one who bestows unconditional love. Kolivan – who probably quickly guessed whose son Keith was – gives Keith a task and sends him to meet with Krolia. Subsequently, they travel together for several years, allowing Keith to satisfy the need for maternal love and close the state of his relationship with the maternal figure.

5.2 Woman as Temptress

And here we’re beginning to say hello to the edited S8. Temptress or Deceiver. A person encountered on the path of the protagonist, who takes advantage of his weaknesses and manipulates him for their own purposes. Historically, most often this person appears in the image of a seductive woman, because:

men in life easily trust beauties;

intrigue is a favorite female way of achieving a goal

Keith’s Journey at this stage is still a classic version, but thanks to the people who edited S8 this moment is completely lost. And it’s very bad.

Because the moment disappears when the hero realizes that he was deceived. When he realizes that his weaknesses have been taken advantage of. When he realizes that weaknesses can’t be indulged if you don’t want bad consequences.

So who is our very woman-temptress? That’s right, this is a sweet helpless girl Romelle, tearing out the metal sheathing with her bare hands and knocking out the hatches with her foot. (In this meta, I went through the scenes with Romelle in detail to explain why I consider her a liar )

Keith, look at those sad innocent eyes, how can you not believe them? Look how lonely she is, how she suffers after losing her brother.

What is Keith doing? Keith makes a stand: I see the goal, I believe in myself, I don’t notice obstacles.

When they flew to the moon base, he was already mentally prepared to see evidence of Lotor’s villainy. At the base, they didn’t see either guards or any warehouses with quintessence, but he immediately concluded that Lotor would get it from the Alteans. Why? Because «Do first, think later» is the main motto of the Red Paladin. After all, they were following the trail of the blue quintessence, and Romelle said that Lotor was taking away the Alteans. And Keith hastily decided that there’s a direct connection between the two events.

In mathematical logic, there’s such a concept as necessary and sufficient conditions. A sufficient condition is a condition that is sufficient to declare that the theory is correct. A necessary condition is a condition without which it’s impossible to prove that a theory is correct. The sufficient condition can’t exist without the necessary, but the necessary condition can’t replace the sufficient.

And it so happened that Keith used the necessary condition as sufficient and as a result came to the wrong conclusions. And inspired by righteous rage, our protector of the innocent flew to punish the big bad Lotor. Punished, well done. So that the whole universe backfired.

5.3 Atonement with Father

Here it is, here is the main moment of the feat. When the hero is faced with the dual figure of the father: both a protector and a tyrant. Literally dual in the face of Shiro and Kuron.

Kit tries to save the Good Father, Shiro, and at the same time – save the last echo of his childhood. But the Good Father says that he’s lost forever and can’t be returned in any way, and Keith has to come to terms with this. Because his friends need him. Because paladins need their leader.

And only at this moment, when Keith agrees to give up childhood and accept responsibility, he comes to terms with his father figure.

The Evil Father waited until his son became an adult, and ceased to be a source of fear and aggression. Kuron and Shiro merge, returning not Good or Evil, but just a Father to Keith. Not an all-powerful protector, but a person who’s ready to support his son and needs to be supported.

The feat was finally accomplished. The dragon is defeated without firing a shot.

But is this the end? No, this is not at all the end of the Hero’s Journey, but only the middle. The only problem is that the next stage – leading up to the recieving of the award – has been ripped out of Keith’s storyline.

But this is the most important stage.

Stage 6. Transformation

Having accomplished the feat, the hero changes internally and looks at the world with new eyes.

This stage for Keith began in S7 and should have reached its top by the middle, if not the end of S8.

Keith stopped running from responsibility. He agreed to become a leader. But he must also understand how to do it correctly. Draw conclusions from everything that happened in the past.

Shiro taught him to be decisive and not afraid of the unknown. Keith learned this lesson.

Now it’s time to learn Kolivan’s lesson. A lesson of realizing that every action has its consequences. And that you need to calculate and think before you do something.

But thanks to the changes in S8, instead of a process of awareness, instead of seeing the consequences of his actions and drawing conclusions, Keith suddenly turned into a «wise leader», infallible and invincible. So wise that he even teaches Zarkon.

Keith. Teaches. Zarkon.

You know, I sincerely admire Zarkon as a person. A great warrior, a great strategist, a wise ruler who concluded peace treaties and alliances for the good of his people. A loving husband and father. He was mistaken in only one thing – when, in desperation, he risked everything to save his wife and son.

Whatever one may say, but this is the most well-written pairing of the series.

And even mad after the shock dose of the quintessence, he – having in his hands only a disadvantaged people and a handful of ships practically left without energy – managed to build the strongest empire in the universe.

And Keith teaches him. The same Keith, who more than once abandoned everything and everyone to save Shiro.

When I watched this scene, I wanted to say only one thing: boy, you are now lecturing a man who came out against your Red Lion with one bayard and almost rolled you into a pancake. And you screwed up so many times that the entire universe burns with a bright flame.

Who are you to teach him?

Neither you nor your whole bunch of paladins were able to defeat Zarkon. Lotor did it, in a fair one-on-one duel.

Who are you to look down on him and claim victory over him? You didn’t defeat him. You weren’t even with the team at that moment.

And who is Keith for the Galra to offer him the throne of the emperor? He’s a savior to Earth, but to the Galra he’s nothing. They don’t care that he’s a Black Paladin, but they know that the paladins of Voltron destroyed the empire and thus broke the lives of many representatives of their people.

I could understand if they tried to make Lahn the ruler. Lahn tried to save at least something left of the empire and took care of his people. Or Kolivan, although the Blades always tried to stay in the shadows. But Keith has done absolutely nothing for the Galra to claim such a title.

Child, instructing adults – quite silly content for children. And all I can do in this case is an endless facepalm.

Someone who seemed to have Keith as a favorite character decided to give him a cookie in the end. To take this cookie from another – hated – character and give it to Keith. True, Keith didn’t need it at all, but the main thing is that another – hated – character has lost his cookie.

But let’s get back to the Hero’s Journey. What was really going to happen there?

Fortunately for us, the initial outline of Keith’s transformation is still being felt. This allows us to make fairly strong assumptions, and not just poke a finger in the sky.

The first – the earliest demonstration of Keith’s internal changes – is the scene with Zethrid. The episode was added in S8, but let’s keep in mind that it was originally planned for the beginning of S7.

Keith forgives Zethrid. Remember what Keith did to any hurt he got as a child? He got into a fight. Why did he do it? Because an insecure, scared person is afraid to appear weak. Therefore, any aggression is immediately responded to, if suddenly someone decides that they can offend him with impunity.

You need to have inner strength and confidence in order to respond to aggression with calmness and mercy. Lotor forgave his generals not only out of sentimentality, but also because he was confident in his abilities. A person filled with inner strength remains calm and merciful even to enemies, because in his soul there’s no fear for his life.

Keith became more confident, and therefore calmer, and most importantly, more merciful. And he found the strength to understand Zethrid, forgive and respond to her aggression with compassion.

There’s nothing special about killing your enemy. True valor is needed to understand them and forgive them. And he needed it, it took him later at the end of S7 to learn an important new lesson.

Unfortunately, to really understand the essence of my reasoning below, you’ll need to read my meta about Admiral Sanda. There’s a lot written there, and I wouldn’t want to drag it all here, so I’ll just build my ideas on what I wrote there.

Now I’ll return to the most recent events of S7. When the team of paladins ends up in prison and learns that it was Admiral Sanda’s fault.

Have you ever wondered why at the moment of confession we’re shown Keith’s face? And what was that face like?

Keith had been running away from the title of leader for so long, because even then he realized that this was a difficult role. Keith became a leader against his will and felt that he was carrying a huge burden.

But becoming more self-confident, more mature, Keith also learned to be more indulgent towards other people’s mistakes.

He understood Sanda because he knew how terrible it was to hold other people’s lives in his hands. And he forgave her, because he found the strength to respond to the stab in the back with compassion.

And Sanda taught him something that no one had ever taught him. Neither Kolivan nor Shiro.

Sanda taught him how to behave as a leader if he realized that he had made a total mistake.

She made no excuses, throwing the blame on Sam Holt.

She didn’t quarrel with the paladins, proving her case to the last.

When she realized that she was mistaken, thereby substituting people who depend on her, she admitted she was wrong. She admitted and asked for forgiveness. And she did everything to fix it – standing up to protect the paladins in a moment of danger.

And this is the most difficult option for taking responsibility. Taking responsibility for the fact that your actions have hurt other people. Who aren’t obliged to forgive you just because you threw up your hands and said «I’m sorry».

And Keith, whose actions brought trouble on dozens, if not hundreds of planets, badly needed this lesson. Sanda, without knowing it, gave Keith advice on how to act in such a situation, and later – in S8 – Keith began to use this advice.

When? Remember the conversation with Lahn. Did Keith have any need to reveal that it was he and Krolia who released the monster? No. Would Lahn ever know about this? Also no. Only Keith and Krolia knew why this creature was free. They might have shoved responsibility on the long-dead Galra, and no one could ever prove otherwise.

But Keith felt guilty for the death of Lahn’s subordinates and felt it right to confess. To take the responsibility. Would Keith from the first seasons, who sought to hide from responsibility behind his Father’s back, have done this? No. That Keith would have said nothing.

The completion of Keith’s Transformation stage, alas, is associated with the return of Lotor and therefore has been completely cut out. After the events of Clear Day, the true details of the events on the Altean colony were to surface, and Keith had to decide how to react to this information.

One thing I can say for sure: a conversation with Zarkon would have had a completely different tone. It’s unlikely that Zarkon would have been struck to tears by the fact that he fought with the entire universe, because for the Galra, all life is war. But he wouldn’t forgive himself an attempt to kill his own child. He wouldn’t forgive himself for the betrayal of his only son.

And Keith, from the height of his guilt – after all, it was he who left Lotor to die – couldn’t help but try to support Zarkon in this moment. And in the end, Zarkon would talk to him about responsibility, not that «Galra blood is cool, it made you a leader».

Upbringing made Keith a leader, the Galra blood gave him only beautiful eyes and chic hair.

Stage 7. Apotheosis

The hero receives his reward, consolidates the experience gained and sets new goals for himself.

Everything is quite simple here. The Blades in the face of Kolivan and Krolia join the celebration of life again, and they all decide what to do with Honerva. Keith has a mom, dad and an older brother. Keith paid off his debts, got his family, and the only obstacle to returning a quiet life is Honerva, not Keith’s personal problems.

Stage 8. Return Threshold

8.1 Refusal of the Return

About this, alas, nothing is known. The only thing I can assume is a state when a person who has returned from the war can’t learn to live peacefully again. In the case of Keith, he’s used to being the leader of the paladins and perhaps so got used to this role that he will no longer want to leave it. But whether Keith had this in reality is unknown.

8.2 Magic Flight

Flight of the paladins between realities on the mega-Voltron.

8.3 Rescue from Without

The Lion Goddess helps the paladins follow Honerva.

8.4 Final Challenge

Paladins meet Honerva in the space between realities. Allura and Lotor leave to restore the worlds, the guys return home.

Stage 9. Return

Free life, the hero becomes the master of his destiny. Epilogue.

From my point of view, there could be no disbandment of the Blades of Marmora. There are enough problems in the universe to require the services of an elite combat unit. And Keith could have stayed there as Kolivan’s assistant. It’s a bit early for the leadership, and it’s not a fact that Keith wants this. By the standards of the Galra, he’s still a very young man, with a whole life ahead of him. Surely there would be scenes with family and friends. Keith should be shown as a serene mature person.

What conclusions can be drawn from everything described above? Well, I personally understood for myself why it was Keith who gained such wild popularity among fans. Monomyth, as always, worked flawlessly and took the minds of people with it. I’m even beginning to suspect that the screenwriters simply took Campbell’s book and used it as a scheme for work, as Lucas once did when creating the old Star Wars trilogy. Keith had every chance of becoming Luke Skywalker of VLD, but, alas, not with that ending.

It’s a pity that such a wonderful work was let down the drain, I hope the screenwriters will please us in the future, and the result of their work will fall into more gracious hands.