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the-fiction-witch · 4 months

Text

Passenger Princess

Media The Queens Gambit

Character Benny Watts

Couple Benny X Reader

Rating SMUT

I sat with a wide smile, on the cream bench seat of the little blue beetle. Benny's beetle to be precise. We had loaded our bags and stuffed the poor beetle almost to bursting point and left our little Brooklyn basement to head on the road to Bakersfield California. Benny had a tournament there for a few days and Benny had an 'aversion' to flying, he'll do it but only if he has to. Besides, we both thought it would be a lovely chance to spend time together on a nice road trip.

We'd been on the road a good while now and we had passed nothing interesting for ages, our fries gone, and snacks depleted. But I know Benny wouldn't stop for a good while longer. Leaving me to sip my huge seven-eleven cola.

The radio on low every so often it would fizzle out where we lost the station so I'd tune it till we found another one, the heating on as it was a rather chilly day, but it too would bounce around given the many places we would pass on this trip.

Benny sat driving, of course, hands on the wheel lazily his hat on the backseat, his jacket still on but he was shuffling and getting uncomfortable in it. Every so often I'd hear his ring clack against the wheel.

“Benny?”

“Ummm?” He didn't move his eyes from the road,

“I'm bored” I pouted laying my head on his shoulder,

He chuckled a moment, “Listen to the radio,”

“Radios boring,”

“Read the map,”

“Maps boring,”

“Read the billboards,”

“Billboards are boring,”

“They're interesting, see fireworks in five miles,”

“Can we get fireworks?”

“No princess,”

“Then why is it interesting!” I complained,

“Because… you can see the shop in five miles. So you can get excited now.”

“Whoopie! Firework store I can't go in” I sighed, “Why can't I have fireworks?”

“You honestly think I'm gonna trust you with fireworks? Explosives! I don't trust you with butter knives”

“One time I stabbed myself!”

“Yes, and I don't trust you,”

“Then what am I supposed to do all these hours?”

“Just relax and be a cute little passenger princess," He said turning to wrap an arm around me and kiss my head.

"but I'm bored Benny,"

"You wanna play chess?" He asked with excitement in his voice,

"No. We played chess four times already."

"Well, I'm sure you can find something to do." He chuckled,

I sighed and tried to relax, I had a nap, I read some billboards but still I was so bored!

"Benny?"

"Ummm?"

"I'm bored."

"I know Princess,"

"How much longer?"

"Sixteen hours?"

"How long till we get food?"

"Another couple of hours we only got McDonald's two hours ago."

"But I'm hungry,"

"you're not hungry you're bored. You're just trying to find something to do and your response to that is to shove stuff in your mouth,"

"You're mean to me."

"Love you too princess." He chuckled,

I sighed and tried to find something to do, and I saw a billboard advertising my favourite fast food place, I looked at the distance on the billboard, and I glanced at the speedometer for a moment doing maths in my mind, but how could I get him to pull over? and I smirked a little looking at Benny, with an evil plan. I would have to be smart, efficient, and time it out perfectly... so I flashed him my most innocent smile,

"Yes?" He asked noticing me looking at him,

"I found something to do,"

"Good," He nods,

I smiled and moved closer, cuddling his arm.

"Awww Hello," He smiled kissing my head, "So long as you're happy,"

I giggled a little waiting till he didn't suspect and moving to rest my hand gently on his thigh, He glanced at me giving me a questionable look but returned his focus to the road, I made sure to be gentle and slow so he wouldn't suspect but ever so slowly moving my hand up his thigh feeling the aged denim of his black jeans, running my fingers across the small divots in the denim slightly discoloured from the fact they always sat in them, until I reached the black leather of his belt.

"Yes?" He glared,

I ignored him, walking my fingers along his belt until I reached the silver buckle giving it a gentle adjust with my fingers

"Yes?" He glared again slightly louder,

"Hi Benny," I cooed as my hand fully grabbed between his legs my thumb on his fly as I squeezed him,

"AHH-" He jumped momentarily swerving the car, "Do. Not. Touch. while I'm driving." He said moving my hand to his thigh again,

"But I'm bored."

"You can find many other things to do other then grabbing my fucking cock!" he complained,

"Awww why? don't you want me too?" I giggled stroking my fingers playfully down his fly as I gave his neck little kisses feeling him slowly getting harder below his jeans,

"Princess..." He glared clearly trying to be angry with me but also uncontrollably enjoying my kisses,

"Come on, it would entertain me?" I giggled gently palming his half-hard erection through his jeans,

"Fine,"

"yay!" I giggled slowly undoing his belt, and his fly, to reveal his black boxers, His grip already began to tighten on the wheel his eyes often glancing at me, "Focus on the road," I told him as I slipped my hand under his boxers and took him in my hand "Aww hi Benny,"

"Hi Princess," He rolled his eyes a little but couldn't help his smirk giving him away, I took a gentle grip of him and rubbed my thumb across his shaft feeling him harden into my hand, Once he was fully hard I gently began to jerk my hand gripping his hilt and moving my hand back and forth slowly getting faster, "Uhhh Princess-" He groaned his fingers wrapping around the wheel tightly slightly biting his bottom lip, "Ummm Princess..."

"Focus on the road," I remind him as I moved to pull his cock completely out his pants leaving him to gasp for a few seconds feeling the cold air across him before I adjusted myself and pressed little kisses to his shaft,

"uhhhh princess!" He moaned, "Really?"

"Mhm" I nodded, moving to take just the tip into my mouth sucking and swirling my tongue around him

"Ummmm! Fuck-" He groans, holding the wheel in a vice-like grip trying not to close his eyes or throw his head back, I giggled and moved to take all of him into my mouth sucking gently and moving my head up and down at the pace I knew he couldn't resist "Ohh holy- Princess! You're really gonna do this to me?" He gasped, "You know you keep going I won't be able to say no?" He asked, I just continued slowly getting faster and sucking a little harder "Ughhhh! you evil little princess!" He groans now gnawing on his lip and squeezing his eyes shut at times rolling his head against his headrest, I knew he was close as his hand left the wheel to sit on my head twisting into my hair to keep me at his desired pace, even his hips couldn't resist me bucking up to slightly to cause me to deep throat him, "Ughhh uuuhhh! Princess please I'll-" He muttered feeling just how close he was, and right on time he pulled off the road and parked up turning the engine off and twisting both his hands in my hair throwing his head against his headrest, his mouth hung open, his eyes squeezed shut as his grip on my hair forced me a little bit faster which got him to his edge. His hips bucked in jagged unplanned movements as he buried his jizz in my mouth, I swallowed and licked him clean giving him a few gentle kisses as he gasped and moaned in his post-orgasmic state "Fuck- You did find something to entertain you didn't you princess."

"I did," I smiled sitting up and wiping my mouth before kissing his cheek, "Love you,"

"Love you too." He smiled fixing himself up,

"Oohh would you look at that?" I giggled as we had pulled over into the exact fast-food restaurant I wanted,

the moment he realized he glared at me, "You... are an evil, conniving, smart ass when you wanna be."

"I know,"

"you know... You could be a genius if you applied yourself."

"I am a genius," I giggled climbing out of the car with my bag,

"Yeah, an evil genius." He said climbing out too,

"still a genius, and you still love me?" I giggled hugging his arm,

"Of course I do princess." He smiled kissing my head,

#benny smut #benny fanfic #benny #benny watts #tqg benny watts #benny watts smut #benny watts imagine #bennywattssmut #thequeensgambit #tbs #thomas brodie sangster #tbs smut #tbs imagine #thomas sangster imagine #tbs imagines #thomas brodie sangster smut #thomas brodie sangster imagine #thomasbrodiesangster #thomas sangster

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dykehayleywilliams · 8 months

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now presenting.... a showdown for the most iconic hayley williams outfit of all time!

Currently in round 2!

Active Polls: Hangout Music Fest 2015 v. SXSW 2013 | House of Blues 2009 v. Paraween 2022

#now presenting my latest insomnia fueled project democracy edition!#i love how you can tell when i'm experiencing some kind of career crisis because i do shit like this anyways slay!#y'all better participate or i will rig this whole thing for my picks to win #hayley williams #most iconic outfit of all time #<- i suck at organized tagging but i figure i should use a dedicated tag for this lol

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dingochef · 11 months

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Pairing: Jake "Hangman" Seresin x You (OFC)

Warnings: Swearing, Smut (MDNI 18+ Only), Stalking, P in V, oral (female and male receiving), Semi-public sex, light spanking,

Word Count: 2.4

Summary: You go out of town and realize the obvious.

Series Masterlist

My Masterlist

Chapter 4

Chapter 5: Duh

Monday morning is a little chaotic as you try to find your laptop charger and a few other items. Jake and you end up leaving about the same time, you headed north in Lil Blue, the Honda CR-V and Jake headed to the base on his bike.

You arrive in Bakersfield on time and are immediately slammed into meetings, finally it's 5 pm and you are headed to the hotel to check in. You had stopped by a deli and grabbed a sandwich on yourway over, your desire to go anywhere at zero.

You eat your sandwich and then head to the gym. The workout is nice and works off all the pent up energy from the hours in the car and the meetings.

Just as you're heading up to your room you get a text from Jake.

Jake: I left you a little gift in the bottom of your bag. 😉

You: Should I be concerned?

Jake: Yes

Jake: In a good way.

You enter your room and your curiosity is killing you. You go directly to your bag and rifle through till you feel a boxy object in the bottom. Pulling it out you laugh in surprise, it's a Bluetooth/WiFi enabled vibrating egg, a sex toy and a bottle of lube. There's a sticky note attached to it.

El,

Something to make our night more fun. I already downloaded the app and synced it to your phone. (Might want change your pin to something less obvious, aerospace nerd. 1969 the year of the moon landing.) Call me when you're ready.

-J

You roll your eyes at his jab at your security code, smartly everything you use for work requires your fingerprint. After a quick shower you get comfortable on the bed. You hadn't bother getting dressed. The app, discreetly named Egg Timer, which makes you laugh a little, is discreetly tucked on the last page of your phone.

As you open the app up the egg vibrates in your hand. There's a simple remote with intensity and vibrating patterns on it. You test them out to get an idea of what it's capable of. There's a little box at the bottom that says, "Other Users: J". Your phone dings and there's a text from Jake.

It's a photo of Jake, looking down at his abs with one hand just under the waistband of his boxer briefs cupping his cock under the fabric. His golden treasure trail and thick veins of his arms are visible in the photo. Sexy but not pornographic. The picture makes you shift on the bed and rub your thighs together in anticipation. The slick starts to gather between your legs and you are definitely ready to call Jake.

He answers quickly.

"Hello, El," he purrs.

"This is quite the gift here, Jake" you reply.

He laughs,

"I thought you'd like it. Fun fact, I can control it from here."

It comes to life in your hand.

"Ooh, interesting."

"What are you wearing, El?"

"Nothing, just laying here naked, fresh out of the shower. You?"

Jake groans softly, no doubt imagining your slightly wet skin and hair laid out on the bed. Your dark hair a delicious contrast to the generic white hotel sheets.

"Just that featured pair of underwear," he finally answers.

"A nice choice," you reply, trying to sound sultry and tamper the neediness you feel rising you,

"I think you have a plan for tonight, am I right?"

There's a light chuckle at the other end of the phone,

"Yes, I do. You have the toy and the lube nearby?"

"Yes," you answer, getting a little more breathless as you rub your thighs together.

"We'll get there, you just wanted you to be ready for when we do. I miss you right now, El. I want to feel your lips on mine, kiss every inch of you, taste you, feel you around my cock, and watch you come. I want you to touch yourself and tell you what you're imagining. I want to know how you make yourself come."

"I start by running my hands over myself, play with my tits, pinch my nipples, anything but going straight to my pussy."

Jake moans lightly on the other end of the phone.

"Then I finally start touching my pussy, but still not touching my clit or using any fingers inside me, just teasing myself a little bit."

"Go on," Jake breathes out more than saying.

"Next I'll test how wet I am and if I need some lube."

You dip a finger inside your slit and find that you are wet, not as wet if Jake were here with you.

"Are you wet, El?"

You add another finger,

"Yes, Jake, I'm wet. Not like you make me but enough."

He groans at the praise,

"This is a good time for that lube and you to use that toy."

You open the bottle of lube and apply some to your hand that you sweep over your clit and the rest of your pussy. Next coat the toy and gently push it inside your pussy.

You let out a little sigh of relief,

"I just put the toy inside me, it feels good, but it just makes you want your cock more, this isn't big enough."

"You'll have to wait till you get home for the good stuff," Jake laughs.

"Now, I'm touching my clit."

"What are you thinking about, what's turning you on?"

"I'm thinking of the time we fucked against the wall after we teased each other the whole way back from the beach. I thought about you fucking you against a wall when you lifted me up at that game. It made me wet right then and there, I almost dropped the ball at the thought of it."

"You were already thinking about you fucking you on the first date, dirty girl."

The toy starts to vibrate at a gentle steady hum and you can't suppress the moan of surprise and pleasure.

"Oh, ohhhh," you pant.

"Feeling stimulated?" Jake asks, you can hear the cockiness in his smile even through the phone.

"Yes."

"Keep talking, El."

"I'm thinking of how much I want your tongue on you and the though of you between my legs eating me out."

There is a slight hitch in his breath and you know Jake is touching himself.

"I'm also thinking about things I want to do with you, like let you tie me up and do anything you want. Maybe add a blindfold and have you tease me till I'm frustrated with need and then you release all your pent up lust on me and make us both come at the same time."

The vibration from the toy gets more intense.

You let out a long moan,

"Jake, that feels so good."

The intensity notches up again and a pulsing pattern starts up. Your fingers are working harder at your clit and your brain is starting to short circuit and your thoughts are coming out of your mouth in a jumble.

"I love it when you fuck me from behind, slap my ass, so good," you stutter.

Jake's moans are coming louder and closer together.

"Ready, El, ready to come?"

"Please, please, let you come," you plead.

The toy changes patterns and yet another higher intensity. That combined with Jake's low command,

"Come, El, come for me,"

you break apart.

"Oh God, oh shit," you spit out before a long low moan comes from you as you spasm around the toy.

Jake makes the sound, a strangled moan, he usually makes when he comes on the other end of the phone.

You feel the toy slowing down inside you gently until it is off.

"I really liked this idea, as you can tell," you let Jake know.

"I figured it might work. The idea of being so far from you and still controlling your pleasure is a sexy one. Just about any thought you have about you is a sexy one," he says softly.

"Ditto, I'm going to let you go, sweet dreams, Jake. Love you."

"Love you,too, El."

You clean up and crawl back into bed falling asleep quickly.

Tuesday is a typical day with more meetings, some flight demonstrations, and some material demonstrations. The new heat shielding is showing promise for the next version of Darkstar.

You stay out a little later on Tuesday with your coworkers as you know Jake is out catching up with a few buddies who are in San Diego. Finally night comes and you fall asleep half in the book you're reading.

Wednesday morning luckily flies by and you're on the road at a decent time and headed home. You try not to break any land speed records and drive responsibly. Your house is a welcome sight when you pull up to the curb. Grabbing your bags you head into the house. The house is dark and quiet. You do a tour through the rooms to see if Jake is anywhere. When you don't find him, you feel let down. You grab a glass of water and sit down on the couch trying to relax. You're leaning back trying to get comfy and when the thought hits you and you spring forward.

You weren't racing to get back to your house, you were racing to get back to Jake. It's then you realize that you're ready to live together, not this almost thing you've been doing for months. You want this house to be your home with Jake. The idea of seeing Jake everyday when you get home and wake up to him every morning is making your heart full. You also realize that you've been a bit of an idiot to realize it now, when it's been here the whole time.

You call Jake, he answers on the first ring.

"Hello, El."

"Hello, Jake."

"Are you back in town? I missed you."

"I am and I missed you too. Do you mind coming over? I've got something important to talk to you about."

"Umm, you can do that babe. Is everything alright?" he asks, a slight hint of doubt in his voice.

"Oh yeah, that sounds ominous. It's a good thing, I promise."

While you wait for Jake to arrive, you change out of your work clothes and put a few things away from your overnight bag. The toy and lube go into a drawer in the night stand near the bed. Pretty soon, you hear Jake unlocking the front door and calling out,

"El, I'm here."

You walk out of your bedroom and greet him with a crushing hug and a kiss. He wraps his arms around you and he says,

"I missed you," into your hair.

"Me too," you answer back from where your head is tucked into his neck.

He pulls back and asks,

"What did you want to talk about?" His usually calm demeanor betraying a hint of nervousness.

You lead Jake over to the couch to sit down. Taking his hands in yours, you start talking,

"I drove as fast as I could today to get back here, because I thought I wanted to be home, but when I got here and you weren't around, this house just felt empty and lonely. I realized that I nearly got a speeding ticket so I could be back with you as soon as possible. I wanted to see your smiling face when I walked in the door. I want to come home to you everyday. Jake, I want us to live together, if you're ready for that."

The nervousness has dissolved from his face and is now replaced by a wide gorgeous smile. He picks up one of your hands and kisses it.

"I would love to live here with you and I'm definitely ready for that. I am over the moon that you asked, also relieved that this talk wasn't about something scary or unpleasant."

"Sorry to worry you, but it didn't seem like the thing to ask about over the phone."

He draws you for one of his all encompassing hugs and says,

"This is going to be our home," and squeezes you a little harder.

"What about rent, utilities, groceries, etc. I'll pay my share," he asks.

"So, there is no rent. I own the house outright."

"Really?" Jake's eyes wide with surprise,

"The government might want to reconsider what they're paying Lockheed Martin. I'm kidding, but wow that's an accomplishment."

You shrug,

"It was a convergence of extremely good circumstances, I had a large inheritance from my Mom's sister who passed and didn't have any kids or other nieces or nephews. I found this place as kind of a fixer upper and put a lot of sweat equity in, etc. So what we can split is the utilities, taxes, and groceries. We can work out a budget tomorrow. I'd give you a key as a symbolic gesture, but you already have one."

"That and you already have the key to your heart."

You give him a small laugh for the corny line,

"So, what do you need to do to get out of your quarters on base?" you ask.

"Not much, let the powers that be know I'll be out by the end of the month, pack up my stuff, which I think half of it is already here, so that won't take long."

"Awesome, let me know how I can help," you say as you move to straddle Jake's lap.

Taking his face into your hands you give Jake a deep kiss, and say.

"Jake, I'm so happy you said yes."

"El, I'm happy you asked."

Chapter 6

@starswholistenanddreamsanswered

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#top gun maverick #hangman fanfiction #jake seresin fanfiction #hangman #top gun fanfiction #top gun smut #hangman x you #jake hangman seresin x reader #jake hangman seresin x you #jake seresin x you

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irrelevantnostalgia · 3 months

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5. Cake Mania: Lights, Camera, Action (2011)

*Previously on Cake Mania: Main St*

It’s been a while! Throughout this entire cake mania saga I’ve applied, got accepted into, and started medical school. If I’m gonna be honest, this was not even the biggest contributor as to why the Lights, Camera, Action review took forever (I’ll get into another reason later). But I finally finished, and I’m ready to review!

🄿🄻🄾🅃: Pregnancy is the milestone in Jill’s life that is the center of this next Cake Mania game. A game that represents the entirety of her pregnancy would be pretty boring (I would still play it) and at this point they can honestly tack on literally any kind of plot to go along with Jill’s pregnancy. I mean, she’s been to the moon and in Antarctica in Cake Mania 2. She’s time traveled. There are no rules to contain Jill and her journeys. This time, we are going to be dealing with..

A movie being shot in Bakersfield. Directed by...Michele Be. It is going to be a Pride and Prejudice remake with martial arts starring Tiny as Mr Darcy. It will additionally feature: explosions, aliens, a yeti monster, angry dwarves, and ninjas. It’s very lol-so-random-xD, very in-tune with the time that the game was developed and released. Bakersfield is being overrun by all kinds of interesting characters associated with the shooting of the movie. Eventually, it turns out that Michele Be is an evil fraud of a director that treats has cast and crew like dogshit. Risha is the one who saves the day and directs the movie in her own way.

This game is also repeating the set-up that Cake Mania: Main St has, which is welcome by me. Risha has ditched her stepping stone plant nursery and is now running a business that is more in line with her passions--a boutique. Since Tiny is one of the leads of the movie, we aren’t following his sushi restaurant. Now, we get to go through Giorno’s Pizzeria.

🅆🄷🄰🅃'🅂 🄽🄴🅆

No drink station: The drink station did not make a return this time around. I’m not sure why, I didn’t mind the addition of it and thought it was a nice break when things got crazy. This is just a guess on my part, but there is a new addition to the cake-making process that made its debut, and maybe they got rid of this to make room for that.

Equipment breaking: Holy SHIT this is so annoying. The first time this happened was when I finally had enough money to upgrade my snail green oven to the slightly faster purple one. Literally the worst feeling on the planet……which is a welcome addition by me. This introduces conflict that breaks the monotony of the game once you become ultra mega gold standard equipment, where the angry and/or Blue Bubble customers become a minor nuisance instead of ruining the whole level. This also does not occur randomly, as it always occurs once you finish a certain level and the opening screen for the next level is Jack admitting to causing it. Speaking of Jack...

Fruit Station: Jill cannot run around like she usually does and now has let Jack take control of operations, which was a risky move, but what business runs without risks? So while Jack is wreaking havoc around the bakery, Jill is sitting in a corner running the fruit decoration station. This game is not going to let you get away with clicking one button to add fruit to the cake, no. Instead, to add fruit to the cake you have click on the cake in a set pattern.

The equipment: There really isn’t much to say about them, just that I don’t know how I feel about the designs. They feel friendlier and more approachable, but they have less swag than the ones from Cake Mania 3 and Main St.

Here is the final set up for everything ^_^

Risha’s Boutique has a similar “fruit station” where customers can request their clothes to be put in a box with a pretty bow

Risha’s Boutique and Giorno’s Pizzeria have the same general format of the Burger Barn and Sushi Restaurant from the previous game. But let me tell y’all...I could do just about anything and beat a Cake Mania level with the superstar goal. I could move as slow as that damn green equipment and make a surplus of like $400. These two games? If I do not sit in the right position, move my arm 0.00005 m/s slower than what is ideal, and pause for 0.0007 seconds to look at the screen to figure out where to click next I am not even going to make the bare minimum goal to get to the next level. Every move has to be perfectly choreographed in order to beat the level. At least with Giorno’s Pizzeria the ingredients are splayed out so you can easily click on what you need. In Risha’s Boutique, the clothes the customers want will be the tiniest little “shirt” hidden between the jackets that are puffier than the average New Yorker’s and you will just have to angle your cursor just right to click on it. So you would think that Giorno’s Pizzeria was a breeze, huh?

Right?

Well, wrong.

Now...I pride myself on being a good Cake Mania player. I pride myself on being a tenacious one too. I am willing to play a level 60 times in a row to ensure that I do not leave the game without a 100% rate of achieving superstar goals. This time though.....I had to raise my white flag :(

Here is Level 18 of Giorno’s Pizzeria. Broke my streak and everything. This shit literally killed a large part of my soul. Had me tweaking and shaking and crying all at once. Once I hit $473 mark I just couldn’t do it anymore. I’m not sure how I pulled this off besides rapidly clicking on the TVs to keep all customers with a maximum number of hearts (thus, maximum number of tips) AND IT STILL WASN’T ENOUGH.

Level 18 is the reason why it took me so long to upload this review. This time last year, I was well on the way to finishing this game until I got to this level. I just couldn’t beat it, I would be like $20-30 off from the superstar goal most times, which is fairly significant in these two businesses, and when I was still $7 off after giving it my all I was seething. I will not bullshit y’all, the sheer butthurt I felt at not being able to achieve the superstar goal made me take a long, loooooong hiatus from finishing it. And of course, life stuff. However, towards the end of this past semester I picked the game up again, and decided to clear all my progress and restart the entire game. I still didn’t get the superstar goal on day 18 of Giorno’s Pizzeria, but I was able to get it for the rest of the levels. I’m fine with this, I guess (no I’m not).

But in all honesty, even with me being a dramatic sore loser (just guess my zodiac sign from this) one of the biggest factors I look for in these games is ways to keep it engaging and create some challenges. So I really cannot be that mad that Giorno’s Pizzeria made me work for that Superstar goal. With the cake-baking portion of the game, the monotony is inevitable even if it gets delayed with some new approaches to the recipe of the game. The kooky customers are annoying and do create troubles, but what will a Yeti that pisses everyone off really do when you have gold-standard equipment, high-speed TV, and unlimited distraction cookies? With Risha and Giorno’s games....YOU are the oven and the cake froster. Each new upgrade you get is just keeping track of more and more possibilities that customers can throw at you. Especially Giorno’s! With Risha, only the most recent clothes collections get featured while old ones are thrown out. By the end of Giorno’s Pizzeria, you will have an entire produce aisle to keep track of, the customers will want every leafy green on their pizza, AND you will have to put that shit on them in order. Your cursor will be forced to move all around the screen.

Another factor that had me seeing red during Giorno’s is that some of the dishes (like the pizza) would STILL have to bake after you compile all the ingredients

I know, strange thing to complain about, but hear me out. In all of these games, you want the customers to get their orders and gtfo as soon as possible so you can fit in the maximum # of customers and thus get the maximum number of funds. It’s why strategically upgrading equipment is so important in the cake-baking parts of these games. When it comes to Giorno’s Pizzeria, it already feels like an eternity gathering all the ingredients for an order. Longer than clicking a few buttons to make a cake. But then, on top of that for a pizza or lasagna you have to wait additional time for it to bake, and then have to wait on the damn customer to do their stupid emote before leaving!! After all of this, what do you get for an order? $40, maximum

Anyways, here are the low paying cheapskates themselves.

🄲🅄🅂🅃🄾🄼🄴🅁🅂

♥Ballerina♥

Favorite TV Show: ANTM

Omg this is so Lana Black Swan Coquette ^_^

♥Lola Fierezza♥

Favorite TV Show: World Cup

She is That Girl. Because she is That Girl, the moment she steps in and reveals her order, every other customer changes their order to match hers. The Regina George effect. There would be whole levels dedicated to her recurring appearance, and it was fun figuring out how long I should delay handing the menu to her. There is an art to it!

Farmer

Favorite TV Show: ANTM

Average Customer over the age of 50

Favorite TV Show: The Orange channel. I couldn’t think of a witty name for it so I’m just referring it by the button color on the TV

He comes in with a stank attitude, so we’re already off to a great start. It takes maybe a few seconds and then he starts swinging his axe around, which causes customers to leave. Ruining your business in the process. They should have AXED him from this game!

♥Cameraman♥

Favorite TV Show: ANTM

Before you hand him a menu, he’ll film the customers in line which will increase their hearts. I feel like something like that may produce the opposite effect, but I suppose I am living in a post-TikTok world where the sight of someone filming me without my permission would turn me into the above customer

Little Kid

Favorite TV Show: Food Network

That’s so Raven

Favorite TV Show: Food network

In a world filled with Blue Bubble Demons....the game devs decided to give us a character who is actually going to see the pearly gates. Psychic Sheila will use her crystal ball to automatically reveal the order of subsequent customers. It’s like Medieval-level power-up in Cake Mania 3, except we get an entire character who performs this task. I thank her for her service

Me in the Future if I Become a Superhero

Favorite TV Show: World Cup

Meet Super Cat Lady. She turns people into mimes. Kinda lame, would be better if she turned them into cats. Maybe that’s not actually me in the future...

Mime

Favorite TV Show: Food network

Mimes pair up together in a line.

Biblically Accurate Naruto

Favorite TV Show: ANTM

Another Blue Bubble repeat customer. Ninja does exactly what he did last time make your job harder attack people with smokebombs and make them freeze in line.

Firefighter and Stuntman

Favorite TV Shows: ANTM and Food Network

I putting these two together because it is pretty funny. This doesn’t have much consequence for the gameplay or anything, but a stuntman and firefighter being in line together causes the firefighter to hose him lmao.

Sad Sack: Chicken Edition

Favorite TV Show: Orange Channel

Only the most Noble Knight

Favorite TV Show: ANTM

He’s such a good and noble knight. Such a gentleman. He demands to be served before everyone else so that the other customers can have more time looking at the menu ♥ such admirable behavior

Yeti

Favorite TV Show: Orange Channel

He is a double whammy. Not only does he piss people off, but his ass has the nerve to freeze people so they are stuck in place. Pick *one*, jackass!

Klepto Kelly

Favorite TV Show: ANTM

You Know, she looks really nice and snazzy. Her outfit must cost a lot *and* she’s ordering expensive cake. I wonder how she makes a living? Oh yeah, she steals from you, that’s how.

Tiny: Our Leading Man!

Favorite TV Channel: Orange Channel

Another customer who helps you out instead of making you wanna tear your hair out. He orders multiple times, just like he has been doing in the past games!

Risha: Our Debut Director!

Favorite TV Channel: World Cup

Jack: The dumbfuck

He is typically an endearing Himbo, but in these games......🙄........so you already know that in Risha and Giorno’s games you need to be ON IT! Well, when he walks in, the momentum that I would build up throughout the level would be thrown off because now I would need to use my peripheral vision and WAIT on the proper item to show up in his bubble before I could hand it to him and clear out another space for a proper customer. What’s more infuriating is that in Giorno’s level he would only “order” a single ingredient so I had to expend energy looking out for him only to receive $17 in return. And YES, he appeared in Level 18. Ugh!!!

♥Jill: La Reina del pastel♥

I hope the Duolingo lessons are paying off.

Also I never figured out their favorite tv shows. Probably because I didn’t need to haha.

🄼🅈 🄾🄿🄸🄽🄸🄾🄽: I mean hey, what can I say? I can’t get too mad about them repeating a good recipe a second time in a row. I really enjoyed the Main St formatting, and think repeating it one more time to experiment with different kinds of secondary games is alongside adding more “Jill lore” is not a bad idea. Cake baking game is a classic and they basically maintained the formula that everyone knows and loves. The equipment breaking was a nice touch to create more “conflict.” Even if the secondary games (especially the damn pizzeria) made me cope and seethe, I didn’t hate them. In Main St, the Burger Barn and Sushi Restaurant were easy as shit and I beat them with very little struggle. These games, on the other hand, made me work a little bit more for the superstar goals. I don’t mind the more relaxed environment in some of Main St’s secondary games, but as I expressed many times before, I appreciate a good challenge that keeps my on my toes (disregard the long stretch of temper tantrum I had about level 18 of the pizzeria).

I give this game a ⓕⓡⓔⓢⓗ rating on the tomatometer!

Now onto the choice screenshots!

When I saw this shit, I actually keeled over. Jack predicted family vlogging in 2011.

*sighs*

I love Risha talking about “high couture” and then the collection of clothes we are introduced to look like they are from JC Penny.

Look at all of them slayinggggggg. The artstyle here is so pretty I love it.

I will not lie, there were way more screenshots I could have gotten. I couldn’t though, because for some reason this game only works in full-screen. I tried changing my desktop resolution and everything, and the game still wouldn’t budge and I had to play this game full-screen. Which meant. One screenshot per every time I had the chance to play. Let me tell you, each and every screenshot featured in this review I got was very, very strategic. I never put so much brain power in determining when I want to get a screenshot of the customers in my life.

After everything, here is my trophy room.

Well, at least it doesn’t look like I’m missing a trophy from not being able to achieve superstar goals for all the levels in Giorno’s Pizzeria!

#cake mania #cake mania lights camera action #2000s nostalgia #early 2010s #old web #pc game #time management #childhood nostalgia #childhood game #nostalgia

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winguontheweb · 25 days

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That's right, another team member for the Bakersfield Blues, part of @mirrorvi's MBC! This lady's a strong force of positivity for the team!

#wingu #winguthings #mirrorg #mirrorvi #kimberley odonnell #major baseball conference #mbc #baseball #sheep #bakersfield blues

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mostlysignssomeportents · 1 year

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Serializing the first chapter of Red Team Blues

My next novel is Red Team Blues, which comes out on Apr 25; it’s easily the most “commercial” book I’ve ever written — a “grabby thriller” (to quote my publisher), or, as Molly “Web3 Is Going Just Great” White put it, “don’t start reading it at bedtime if you have to be awake for something the next morning.”

https://us.macmillan.com/books/9781250865847/red-team-blues

If you’d like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here’s a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/04/17/have-you-tried-not-spying/#unsalted-hash

Red Team Blues is the story of Martin Hench, a 67 year old, near-retirement forensic accountant who specializes in unwinding Silicon Valley finance scams, who stumbles into the most dangerous job of his life. He gets embroiled in cryptocurrency heist that exposes the finance rot at the heart of tech and the way that it curdled the dream of technology as a force for connection and good.

I’ll be doing a giant tour (San Diego, LA, Burbank, Berkeley, San Francisco, PDX, Mountain View, Vancouver, Calgary, Gaithursburg, DC, Toronto, London, Hay, Oxford, Manchester, Nottingham, Berlin); you can follow the upcoming dates in each day’s edition of my Pluralistic newsletter; here’s today’s:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/04/17/have-you-tried-not-spying/#bragsheet

And to whet your appetite, I’m going to spend the next week or so syndicating the first chapter of Red Team Blues, starting today. In this installment, we meet Martin Hench and the Unsalted Hash, his “foolish and ungainly” tour bus, just as he’s being roped in for the job of his career.

I hope you’ll consider pre-ordering the book! And if you read the book, I hope you’ll post a review or recommendation to your social media or blog. There is literally no greater favor you can do for a writer than to tell the people who trust your judgment about a book you enjoyed. It’s gift more precious than gold.

Here’s where US readers can pre-order the book:

https://us.macmillan.com/books/9781250865847/red-team-blues

Here’s pre-orders for Canadians:

https://services.raincoast.com/scripts/b2b.wsc/featured?hh_isbn=9781250865847&ht_orig_from=raincoast

And for readers in the UK and the rest of the Commonwealth:

https://uk.bookshop.org/p/books/red-team-blues-cory-doctorow/7225998?ean=9781804547755

And now, here’s today’s serial installment:

One evening, I got a wild hair and drove all night from San Diego to Menlo Park. Why Menlo Park? It had both a triple-Michelin-star place and a dear old friend both within spitting distance of the Walmart parking lot, where I could park the Unsalted Hash, leaving me free to drink as much as I cared to and still be able to walk home and crawl into bed.

I’d done a job that turned out better than I’d expected — well enough that I was set for the year if I lived carefully. I didn’t want to live carefully. The age for that was long past. I wanted to live it up. There’d be more work. I wanted to celebrate.

Truth be told, I also didn’t want to contemplate the possibility that, at the age of sixty-seven, the new work might stop coming in. Silicon Valley hates old people, but that was okay, because I hated Silicon Valley. Professionally, that is.

Getting close to Bakersfield, I pulled the Unsalted Hash into a rest stop to stretch my legs and check my phone. After a putter around the picnic tables and vending machine, I walked the perimeter of my foolish and ungainly and luxurious tour bus, checking the tires and making sure the cargo compartments were dogged and locked. I climbed back in, checked my sludge levels and decided they were low enough that I could use my own toilet, then, finally, having forced myself to wait, sat on one of the buttery leather chairs and checked my messages.

That’s how I learned that Danny Lazer was looking for me. He was working the usual channels — DMs from people who I tended to check in with when I was looking for work — and it put a shine on my evening, because sixty-seven or no, there was always work for someone with my skill set. Danny Lazer had a problem with his Trustlesscoin keys, which relied on the best protected cryptographic secrets in the world (nominally). So I messaged him. One rest stop later, just past Gilroy, I got his reply. He was eager to see me. Would I call on him at his home in Palo Alto?

My pathetic little ego swelled up at his eagerness. I told him I had a big dinner planned the next night, but I’d see him the morning after. Truth be told, putting off a man as important as Danny Lazer, even for twenty-four hours, made me feel more important still. I could tell from his reply that the delay chafed at him. I felt petty, but not so much so that I canceled my dinner. My dear old friend was a lively sort, and it was possible we’d walk from the restaurant to her place for an hour or three before I returned to the Walmart parking lot.

Dinner didn’t disappoint, and neither did the fun and games afterward. It was a very nice capstone to a very successful job, and a very good prelude to another job for one of the nicest rich men (or richest nice men) in Silicon Valley.

Danny was old Silicon Valley, a guy who started his own UUCP host so he could help distribute the alt hierarchy and once helped Tim May bring a load of unlicensed firearms across state lines from a Nevada gun show. He’d lived like a monk for decades, writing cryptographic code and fighting with the NSA over it, and had mortgaged his parents’ house back east to keep himself and a couple of programmers in business in a tiny office for a decade while he and Galit lived in a thirty-foot motor home that needed engine tuning once a month just so it could trundle from one parking space to the next.

It was a bet that there would come a day when the internet’s innocence would end and people would want privacy from each other and their governments, and he kept doubling down on that bet through every boom and bust, living on ramen and open cereal boxes from the used food store, refusing to part with any equity except to promising hackers who’d join him, and then the bet paid off, and he became Daniel Moses Lazar, with a 75 percent stake in Keypairs LLC, whose crypto-libraries and workflow tools were the much-ballyhooed picks and shovels of the next internet revolution. Keypairs wasn’t the first unicorn in Silicon Valley, but it was the first one that never took a dime in venture capital and whose sole angels were Danny’s parents back in Jersey, to whom Danny sent at least $100 million before they made him stop, insisting that they had nothing more they wanted in this world.

Galit picked out a big place in Twin Peaks that you could see Alcatraz from on a clear day, gutted it to the foundation slab, bare studs, and ceiling joists, completely rebuilt it while being mindful of both Danny’s specification for networking receptacles throughout, and Galit’s encyclopedic knowledge of the Arts and Crafts Movement. One day, as she was bringing out some Mendocino grig and a cheese board for the two of them to enjoy from their half-built porch, she gasped, complained of pain in both arms, then her chest, and then she collapsed and was dead before the ambulance arrived.

It had been a good marriage: twenty-two years and no kids, because there was nowhere in their old RV to put them unless they wanted to hang them from the rafters. She’d been his rock while he’d built up Keypairs, but he’d been hers, too, rubbing her feet and helping her deal with the endless humiliations that a woman doing administrative work in Silicon Valley had to put up with. He didn’t see it that way, though: after he took possession of her ashes, all he could talk about was how they’d wasted nearly a quarter of a century chasing a fortune that didn’t do either of them a bit of good, and it had cost them the time they could have spent in a beach shack in the Baja while he did two hours of contract work a month to pay for machete sharpening and new hammocks once a year.

A procession of Silicon Valley’s most powerful leaders and most respected technologists filed through the Palo Alto teardown they’d bought to perch in while the Twin Peaks project was underway. People who weren’t merely wealthy but famous for their vision, their sensitivity, their insight. They argued with him about his crushing regrets and tried to tell him how much good he’d done, both for Galit and for the world, but he was unreachable. A consensus emerged among the Friends of Danny that he was not long for this world. Not that he was going to kill himself or anything but that he would simply stop caring about living, and then nature would take its course.

They were right — given all facts in evidence, that was a foregone conclusion. But there was one hidden variable: Sethuramani Balakrishnan, who was twenty-five, brilliant, and had made a series of lateral moves within Keypairs: customer support, then compliance, and finally Danny’s PA, a job she was vastly overqualified for.

She helped him flip the house, then to turn Keypairs over to a management committee carefully balanced between hackers who’d been with Danny since the PDP-8 days, people with real managerial experience and proven experience growing companies and running big teams. He got rid of all the shares he’d taken in over the years to sit on advisory boards and stuck everything into Vanguard index-tracker funds — the ones that didn’t buy a lot of tech stocks.

As far as anyone could tell, Sethu didn’t try to talk him out of any of this, just offered efficient, intelligent, and supremely organized help in getting Danny’s life’s work out of a realm in which it had to be actively managed by someone with Danny’s incredible drive, insight, and technical knowledge, and into an investment vehicle managed by an overgrown spreadsheet, one that would multiply his money ahead of the CPI, year on year, until someone built a guillotine on his lawn.

What Sethu did talk him into was buying a condo around the corner from that Palo Alto teardown, an eight-story place, quiet, built on the grave of another Palo Alto teardown that had been snapped up by property developers in the glory days before NIMBY planning ended all high-density infill within fifty miles of Stanford.

THIS IS THE LAST DAY for the Kickstarter campaign for the audiobook of my next novel, a post-cyberpunk anti-finance finance thriller about Silicon Valley scams called Red Team Blues. Amazon’s Audible refuses to carry my audiobooks because they’re DRM free, but crowdfunding makes them possible.

[Image ID: A squared-off version of Will Staehle's cover for the Macmillan edition of 'Red Team Blues.']

#pluralistic #red team blues #books #novels #technothrillers #thrillers #crypto #cryptocurrency #crypto means cryptography #fiction

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saintmeghanmarkle · 2 months

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A palate cleanser by u/Mickleborough

A palate cleanser Diplomatic dressing made simple.This is from the (then) Cambridges’ 4-day tour of Sweden and Norway in 2018. In Norway William and Kate watched ski jumping at the Holmenkollen Ski Jump in Oslo, where they also participated at an event organised by the Norwegian Ski Federation.Such wholesomeness. (And the fur trim on Kate’s gloves is faux - the gloves are thought to be from British middle-class department store John Lewis.)Kate looks Kjus right in an orange (which could pass for red) and white jacket from Norwegian brand Kjus (co-founded by a Swede, so she‘s paid homage to both host countries with 1 jacket. William’s in blue. Both together make up the colours of the Norwegian flag.Kate was 7 months pregnant in that photo.Then we have Harry and Meghan at Whistler in Canada.This screams Bakersfield outlet shopping.Meghan, a fan of Canada (‘they’re [her website (cough) designer] Canadian, so I’m a fan’) pays homage to Canada by, er... Well, she’s got it 1/3 right, with the white skinny jeans. [Not a good look on you, Meghan love. Seriously.] No red, as per maple leaf on flag. Jacket by Calvin Klein - American. Ditto CO jumper, Frame Jeans, and Sorel boots (Sorel originally was founded in Ontario, but is now owned by an American company). Burberry (as in her beanie) is British (you know, racists).As for Harry - guess it’s rough sleeper chic.Saw a headline along the lines of ‘Meghan wears 10-year-old boots - just like Kate!’, which might explain the boots. Kate too has worn Sorel (of course, she doesn’t have a monopoly on it, the way Meghan’s fans think Meghan has a monopoly on Aquazurra shoes).What I can’t figure out is: Why isn’t Meghan wearing gloves? Let’s say the temperature was 33 F / 1 C (erring on the side of warm). Isn’t that glove weather? People around them seem to think so. But then gloves would cover her finger ornaments, including the newly discovered engagement ring (something about a loose stone which apparently took 9 months to re-set). Bet she made Harry go without gloves (notice he has his free hand in his pocket, maybe to comfort todger) so that she wouldn’t look an idiot holding his gloved hand in her bare one.Meghan also wore Diana’s gold watch. Wouldn’t wearing metal next to your skin in cold weather be, well, cold? post link: https://ift.tt/wR6CAPu author: Mickleborough submitted: February 15, 2024 at 11:47PM via SaintMeghanMarkle on Reddit

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spacetimewithstuartgary · 11 months

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Tulare Lake Grows The San Joaquin Valley sits like a bowl at the base of the southern Sierra. Close to the middle of that bowl is the historic lakebed of Tulare Lake, which was once the largest freshwater lake west of the Mississippi River. Since the 1920s, the rivers that fed the lake have been dammed and diverted for agriculture and other uses. The lakebed has since been covered with farms that produce a variety of crops and livestock. But after two major storms hit southern California in March 2023, water once again returned to Tulare. The image above (centre), acquired by the Operational Land Imager (OLI) on Landsat 8, shows flooded farm fields in the lakebed on April 30, 2023. The image on the top—acquired by the OLI-2 on Landsat 9—shows the same area on February 1, before significant flooding started. These images are false color, which makes the water (dark blue) stand out from its surroundings. Vegetation is green and bare ground is brown. The lower images show the progression of flooding in the Tulare Lake basin. They were acquired by the Moderate Resolution Imaging Spectroradiometer (MODIS) on NASA’s Aqua satellite between March 2 and April 28, 2023. Flooding in the lakebed is likely to continue into 2024, which will affect residents and farmers in the area, as well as some of the most productive cropland in the Central Valley. The lakebed contains farms that produced cotton, tomatoes, dairy, safflower, pistachios, wheat, and almonds. The town of Corcoran, on the edge of Tulare’s historic extent, is at risk of flooding from the rising waters. A 14.5-mile L-shaped levee stands between the farm town and the flooding. The community recently began a project to raise the height of the levee by 4 feet, to prevent the levee from being overtopped. Meltwater from the snowpack on the southern Sierra—which was four times the average in April—is a major source of water for the Tulare Lake basin. Sierra meltwater streams into Kern River, which flows from the Sequoia National Forest in the southern Sierra, past Bakersfield, and ultimately empties into Tulare Lake. Along the way, the river also contributes to Lake Isabella, a dammed reservoir in Sequoia National Forest that has been filling with water this year. High levels of water along the Kern have led managers to discharge water from the river into ponds just west of Bakersfield. Flooding these recharge ponds allows water to seep into aquifers for long-term storage. The graphic below shows these flooded ponds on April 30, 2023, compared to February 1. The images were acquired by the OLI on Landsat 8 and the OLI-2 on Landsat 9, respectively. “All the dark blue water you see is being managed in recharge ponds,” said Kern River watermaster Mark Mulkay, after seeing the images. In anticipation of more meltwater coming down from the Sierras, local and federal water managers are releasing water into ponds like these not only to store water for future use but also to prevent uncontrolled flooding along the river and the Isabella Reservoir to the east. “This early water recharge will keep flood water from the Kern out of Tulare Lake to help minimize the flood damages in that area,” Mulkay added. Snowpack in the Sierras is not finished delivering challenges to the San Joaquin Valley. Spring snowmelt has just begun, and according to the May 1 snow survey by the California Department of Water Resources, snowpack on the entire range is still twice the normal level. NASA Earth Observatory images by Lauren Dauphin, using Landsat data from the U.S. Geological Survey and MODIS data from NASA EOSDIS LANCE and GIBS/Worldview. Story by Emily Cassidy.

#space #science #earth observatory #nasa #news #california

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hippography · 1 year

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EZRA HAWKINS 20693

Sire: Dara Peavine 9157

Dam: Sally O. 17596

Owned by MRS. H. S. SUMERLIN, San Diego, Calif.

This upstanding gelded son of Dare Peavine is as bold and spectacular in his performances as any horse showing on the Pacific Coast today. He was a consistent ribbon winner in every one of the eight shows in which he started during 1948. He won the stake at Silvergate in San Diego and was reserve in the $1000.00 championship stake at Bakersfield, also reserve champion at Imperial and reserve in the gelding stake at Del Mar.

Although he placed way down at Pomona, there is no question in the minds of many horsemen and thousands of spectators that he made the greatest performance of any stallion, more or gelding in the championship stake. It was the consensus of Saddle horse men who witnessed that event that Ezra Hawkins was the "most cheated horse of the season" when he did not place higher in that particular stake. It is admitted that the gelding lacks quality and fineness, but the outstanding performance that he turned in at Pomona was of the caliber that is expected of stake horses and stood out by comparison with several of the other contestants.

Ezra Hawkins is by Dare Peavine, the stallion which sired such equine celebrities Blue Secret, Romantic Lady, Brandywine, Yankee Doodle Dare, Sally May's King, et al.

The dam of Ezra Hawkins is Sally O. by Edna May's King. She was a better than average show mare and has proven to be an exceptional matron, having produced Romantic Lady, Four Roses, Lem Hawkins and Sadie Hawkins.

The gelding was "made" from his very beginning by Poncho Kibbee and was trained and shown by Mr. Kibbee, who is up in this picture. He is owned by Mrs. H. S. Sumerlin of San Diego, California, who also is the owner of *Bonita Valley King, winner of the yearling colt class in California's 1948 Futurity. It was Mrs. Sumerlin who, in 1941, brought out from the East that great little gelding, Artist's Love, and Hazel Twigg (a bay walk-trot mare), both of which now are consistent ribbon winners for other owners.

Betty Jellinek (ed.), 1949, Here's who in Horses of the Pacific Coast, Vol. 5

#American Saddlebred #Ezra Hawkins #gaited horse #Poncho Kibbee #Cosner #1949 #Here's Who in Horses of the Pacific Coast

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horizon-forbidden-sheesh · 4 months

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Hey, here’s a nifty reference tool that’s been sitting in my drafts for over a year!!

Location key & more notes on distances and travel below the break.

*Locations aren’t always exact, but were chosen to determine approximate distance & travel times.

NORA (Blue)

- Mother’s Watch = Colorado Springs, CO

- Hunter’s Gathering = Montrose, CO

BANUK (Teal)

- Stone Yield = Yellowstone, WY

- Song’s Edge = Moran, WY

- Banuk Encampment = Hahns Peak Village, CO

OSERAM (Orange)

- Free Heap = Green River, UT

- Hidden Ember = Las Vegas, NV

- The Claim = ???, ID

CARJA (Red)

- Dawn’s Sentinel = Grand Junction, CO

- Daytower Gate = Gateway, CO

- Gatelands = Canyonlands, UT

- Meridian = Red Mesa, AZ

- Sunfall = Bryce Canyon

- Chainscrape = Big Water, UT

- Barren Light = Page, AZ

UTARU (Green)

- Plainsong = Dixie Forest, UT

- Riverhymn = Frisco Peak, UT

- Stone’s Echo = Fredonia, AZ

THE BASE (Nora Blue)

- Wheeler Peak, NV

TENAKTH (Clan Colors)

- Arrowhand = Caliente, NV

- Scalding Spear = Duckwater, NV

- Memorial Grove = Silver Peak, NV

- The Bulwark = Yosemite Valley, CA

- Thornmarsh = Bakersfield, CA

QUEN (Coral)

- Legacy’s Landfall = San Francisco, CA

OLD ONES (Grey)

- Maker’s End = Salt Lake City, UT

- The Greenhouse = Sacramento, CA

- Zenith Lab = Los Angeles, CA

TRAVEL SPEEDS

Jogging (6mph / 10mph sprint)

*half travel day: 4 hrs (25 mi.)

*full travel day: 8 hrs (50-60 mi.)

*through the night: 12 hrs (100 mi.)

Riding (25mph / 45mph sprint / 3x Jogging)

**half travel day: 3 hrs (80 mi.) /= 1.5 days of travel by foot

**full travel day: 6 hrs (150 mi.) /= 3 days of travel by foot

**through the night: 12 hrs (450 mi.) /= 1-2 weeks of travel by foot

Flying (80mph / 10x Jogging / 3x Riding)

***half travel day: 3 hrs (250 mi.) /= 1 week of travel by foot

***full travel day: 6 hrs (500 mi.) /= 1 week of travel by charger

DISTANCES

Base to Scalding Spear = ~100 mi (on foot: thru night / on charger: 4hrs / on sunning: 1hr)

Base to Memorial Grove = ~300 mi (on foot: 3-5 days / on charger: 1 day / on sunwing: 2hrs)

Base to Bulwark = ~450 mi (on foot: 1 week / on charger: thru night / on sunwing: 4hrs)

Base to Thornmarsh = ~500 mi

Base to Legacy’s Landfall = ~700 mi (on foot: 2-3 weeks / on charger: 2 days / on sunwing: 6hr)

Base to Plainsong = ~80 mi (but assume you can glide most of it and get there in half a day)

Base to Barren Light = ~250 mi

Base to Chainscrape = ~300 mi

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disappearinginq · 10 months

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One of these days, I’ll tell the story about how my roommates and I did a more thorough job investigating another roommate’s disappearance that got me on the NCIS watch list, but today is not that day.

Instead, today is the day when I am reminded that some Navy buddies truly were ‘ride or die’.

There were three of us - me, Jackie, and Natalie - who were older than most recruits in the barracks by several years. I was the baby of the bunch, Natalie was the oldest, and Jackie was in between, which meant that we hung out more often than most because we didn’t have to worry about stupid teenagers dragging us into their bullshit. We were thick as thieves at one point, but life happens, the Navy separated us, and we wound up on opposite ends of the country, only really talking through the occasional Facebook posts - for the last eight years.

This past Monday, I got an out of the blue text from Natalie saying she was in, of all fucked up places, Harrison, Arkansas. You might not know the name, but I bet you know the pictures - huge billboards on the highway say things like this:

Natalie is not white. She is not even passably white-ish. Last I knew, she was a minister in California somewhere near Bakersfield with her husband. I have no idea what possessed her to not only go to this town, but to stop there and take up residency.

Anyway - she sends me a text asking me to go out to Satan’s asshole Arkansas for a week on her dime, and “take pictures of her bruises” so that “if/when I die, it will not cause an uproar in this town with beautiful people I have come to love” and then proceeds to send me a bunch of pictures of her that make it look like she was in a motorcycle accident - bruises everywhere, bandages and bandaides, a hospital bracelet, and what looks like where an IV was placed and tells me “pictures of my body after being dragged through the street and and up and down hospital hallways.”

At this point, I’m lowkey freaking out because it sounds like she was assaulted in the street and wound up at the hospital for her injuries from a racially motivated attack and now she’s trying to down play the severity of it so I don’t end up rolling into town like fucking Sherman rolled into Atlanta, but she’s not answering any direct questions about what happened. She says she’s going to bed, she gives me her phone number, and tells me good night (it was past midnight where I live). I tell her I don’t have any time to be able to come down because I just started a new job, but she was more than welcome to get the hell out of dodge and come to my house.

I try to call in the morning, afternoon, and evening, and her number goes straight to voicemail. I give her my two numbers and tell her to call me. She doesn’t. Monday night, she sends a text saying that I won, she’d come to see me, couldn’t wait to bring a second income to my family which was now her family (which is also weird because last I knew, she had a family of 8-9 siblings that were all super close) and she would be leaving expressly - but she needed a new phone and a new credit card because "I'm not taking any chances with folks who ACT like they support the Vets but really do not....” . SO now I’m freaking out that she’s being actively PERSUED by the people who assaulted her, and I try calling six-ish more times and never get a reponse from her, and now I’m thinking she’s dead in a ditch in Arkansas killed by a fucking lynchmob and I have to go fucking torch this place, but I text Jackie instead, asking if she’s heard from Natalie lately, and give her the whole lowdown.

Summed up:

Jackie: I’M ON IT.

She proceeds to call the local hospitals asking if they have a patient with Natalie’s name, but gets nothing. And we’re trying to remember what the hell Natalie’s last name is because she was married, and she’s using her middle name to go by, and I finally back track a conversation from YEARS ago, find it, and again start calling the hospitals. Then we try the police. They admit that they have a record of someone with her name, but it’s not recent. Jackie is very diplomatic and says that we’re worried about our friend, could someone do a welfare check, and the police hedge and say that the address isn’t really anywhere they can do a welfare check.

I scan back through Natalie’s texts, and I get the sudden impression Natalie is living out of her van (which isn’t actually all that weird, her mother used to travel between all the kids and grandkids like that), but she’s quite possibly actually homeless.

So then we start back tracking through her Facebook profile, texting every one of her friends, Jackie working top down, and me from the bottom up. Jackie gets a hit with one of them, a woman who says she’s Natalie’s best friend. So we send her the texts and pictures Natalie sent me, and her only reaction is: “I think she’s not feeling well again.”

The assault Natalie was describing was her fighting with the fucking hospital that she was being checked into for a mental health crisis. This is apparently a semi regular occurence, or at least, a repeat issue, because it’s happened more than once. Her husband either left or she left him because of it, at least four years ago. Nobody knows how the fuck she settled on Harrison, AR, of all places, but we can’t reach her on her phone because they confiscate your phone when you’re checked in by the police. The last time anyone spoke directly with her is the 9th of July, and that’s it. It turns out her family had no idea where she was, but had been trying to contact her with no response, but Detective JACKIE for the win managed to track down her apartment and got the manager to send someone to do a welfare check to see if she was even still living there. Currently waiting on a response.

SO THAT’S BEEN FUN. HOW WAS EVERYONE ELSE’S WEEK?!

#weirdly reassuring to think she's in the mental ward #because I'd rather her be schizophrenic than DEAD #BUT WHAT THE FUCK IS SHE EVEN DOING THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE?!#And I don't mean the hospital #I mean RACIST AS FUCK MIDDLE AMERICA

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